1
00:00:02,401 --> 00:00:06,462
There is nothing wrong,
nor will there ever be wrong,
2
00:00:06,538 --> 00:00:08,472
with any Sabre printers.
3
00:00:08,540 --> 00:00:09,564
Case closed.
4
00:00:12,110 --> 00:00:14,203
Michael Scott,
as seen on TV.
5
00:00:14,279 --> 00:00:18,238
I saw you on the news
and I want to pinch your tiny wiener.
6
00:00:18,316 --> 00:00:19,840
Oh, my God.
7
00:00:19,918 --> 00:00:21,078
It's Packer.
8
00:00:21,186 --> 00:00:24,553
Oh! Pac-Man,
I thought you were a girl.
9
00:00:24,623 --> 00:00:27,319
Apparently,
there are allegations
10
00:00:27,392 --> 00:00:29,826
that Sabre printers
can cause a fire.
11
00:00:30,395 --> 00:00:33,523
So, they asked me to give
a statement to the press.
12
00:00:33,598 --> 00:00:36,328
I'm like,
"What? All right."
13
00:00:36,668 --> 00:00:38,067
So, I do it.
14
00:00:38,136 --> 00:00:42,038
It's on TV last night,
and it's in the paper today,
15
00:00:42,107 --> 00:00:43,631
and it's online.
16
00:00:43,708 --> 00:00:47,735
And then I call Froggy 98.7,
their request line.
17
00:00:47,813 --> 00:00:49,644
I talked to the host
about it on the air.
18
00:00:49,714 --> 00:00:52,410
It's like,
"Come on, people, enough."
19
00:00:52,918 --> 00:00:55,011
Everybody,
we are at DEFCON 5.
20
00:00:55,086 --> 00:00:58,249
I am officially the second
most watched clip of the day
21
00:00:58,323 --> 00:01:00,188
on the WBRE news site.
22
00:01:00,258 --> 00:01:01,247
What's number one?
23
00:01:01,326 --> 00:01:04,295
Oh? That teacher who was wrongfully
accused of being a pedophile.
24
00:01:04,362 --> 00:01:07,525
Now, we cannot let
the pedophile win again.
25
00:01:07,899 --> 00:01:11,391
I would like you all to go to the
Web site and watch my clip 11 times.
26
00:01:11,470 --> 00:01:12,994
So, instead of working, you want... Yes.
27
00:01:13,071 --> 00:01:14,436
Okay.
Yes.
28
00:01:14,506 --> 00:01:15,734
Come on.
29
00:01:16,875 --> 00:01:20,971
Get it up. That's what... Let's do it.
30
00:01:21,947 --> 00:01:24,006
Oh! Did you
see this report
31
00:01:24,082 --> 00:01:25,879
that the zoo
got a baby otter?
32
00:01:26,051 --> 00:01:27,177
It's on the same site.
33
00:01:27,252 --> 00:01:29,482
Aw!
It's kissing its mommy.
34
00:01:29,554 --> 00:01:30,782
Please. Michael,
you have to see this.
35
00:01:30,856 --> 00:01:32,448
This is, like,
the cutest thing ever.
36
00:01:34,192 --> 00:01:39,425
Really? A baby otter? Okay,
count me in as "Who cares?"
37
00:01:39,698 --> 00:01:42,690
It's not even that
interesting, the baby otter.
38
00:01:43,001 --> 00:01:45,128
It can't even stand up.
39
00:01:45,203 --> 00:01:46,830
It's trying to stand up.
40
00:01:49,741 --> 00:01:51,231
There he goes.
41
00:02:17,836 --> 00:02:19,235
Howdy.
42
00:02:20,272 --> 00:02:22,206
I hope I'm not
interrupting anything.
43
00:02:22,274 --> 00:02:24,333
Jo, we were
not expecting you.
44
00:02:24,409 --> 00:02:26,104
But you all no doubt
know why I'm here.
45
00:02:26,177 --> 00:02:28,873
No. Turns out our printers are famous.
46
00:02:29,748 --> 00:02:31,648
They're all over
the news.
47
00:02:31,917 --> 00:02:33,179
It's an
interesting story.
48
00:02:34,119 --> 00:02:36,587
Cheap, foreign printers
49
00:02:37,088 --> 00:02:38,783
attacking
innocent Americans.
50
00:02:39,190 --> 00:02:42,421
Well, actually the real
story isn't quite as racy.
51
00:02:43,161 --> 00:02:44,219
But
52
00:02:47,065 --> 00:02:48,225
let's give it a go.
53
00:02:48,466 --> 00:02:50,661
Jo, I think that
I know what happened.
54
00:02:51,236 --> 00:02:53,136
I'm not sure you do,
teddy bear.
55
00:02:53,471 --> 00:02:55,530
Well, now I think
I might not.
56
00:02:56,308 --> 00:02:59,402
Not long ago, we discovered a
defect in one of our printers.
57
00:02:59,477 --> 00:03:01,911
So, we got a software
patch, fixed it right up.
58
00:03:01,980 --> 00:03:03,242
Just like that.
59
00:03:03,315 --> 00:03:04,714
I don't know
how it works.
60
00:03:05,684 --> 00:03:07,982
Just as we
were about to
61
00:03:08,053 --> 00:03:10,544
send out a letter to
our affected customers,
62
00:03:10,722 --> 00:03:14,123
giving them free toner,
and we keep them happy.
63
00:03:14,526 --> 00:03:16,960
But somebody here, they
liked that first story better.
64
00:03:17,228 --> 00:03:19,287
The one where
we lose half our clients
65
00:03:19,497 --> 00:03:21,522
For no damn good reason!
66
00:03:23,335 --> 00:03:27,203
Whoever it was who talked to the
press, just come forward, please.
67
00:03:27,372 --> 00:03:28,361
Jo,
68
00:03:28,607 --> 00:03:30,165
I can assure you it was
no one in this office.
69
00:03:30,542 --> 00:03:32,237
Can you, now?
Absolutely.
70
00:03:32,377 --> 00:03:34,504
Anyone who talked to the
press, please raise your hand.
71
00:03:37,148 --> 00:03:38,445
Put your hand up,
Norma Rae.
72
00:03:38,917 --> 00:03:41,681
If you say anything,
so help me God,
73
00:03:41,753 --> 00:03:43,345
I'll break off the
temples of your glasses
74
00:03:43,421 --> 00:03:44,945
and stick them in
your eye sockets.
75
00:03:45,023 --> 00:03:46,388
So unfair.
76
00:03:46,591 --> 00:03:49,890
Even if I thought that our
printers killed baby seals,
77
00:03:49,961 --> 00:03:52,293
I would not be
a whistleblower.
78
00:03:52,364 --> 00:03:55,959
The Bernards, for generations,
have silenced whistleblowers.
79
00:03:56,034 --> 00:03:58,025
It's how
we made all our money.
80
00:03:58,103 --> 00:03:59,900
Woody Guthrie
wrote a song about us.
81
00:04:00,872 --> 00:04:02,703
Old Mister Bernard
82
00:04:02,774 --> 00:04:04,503
Old Mister Bernard
83
00:04:04,843 --> 00:04:07,744
Who have you silenced today?
84
00:04:07,812 --> 00:04:10,838
It's a little form.
Says, "I did not do it."
85
00:04:11,182 --> 00:04:13,116
There is no reason for
anyone here to sign this
86
00:04:13,184 --> 00:04:15,618
because I know everything there
is to know about these people.
87
00:04:15,987 --> 00:04:17,511
I know when
their birthdays are,
88
00:04:17,589 --> 00:04:19,056
I know what their
favorite kind of cake is,
89
00:04:19,124 --> 00:04:20,614
I know what color
streamers they like.
90
00:04:21,526 --> 00:04:23,118
All that's just birthday
information, Michael.
91
00:04:23,194 --> 00:04:25,719
Yes, yes, but it
shows a bigger picture.
92
00:04:25,797 --> 00:04:27,196
Why don't you
come with me?
93
00:04:27,365 --> 00:04:29,595
We'll start out with the
honcho, what d'you say?
94
00:04:29,668 --> 00:04:30,760
Okay.
95
00:04:31,102 --> 00:04:33,195
When Mama was working
as a prison guard,
96
00:04:33,271 --> 00:04:36,331
and something went missing,
she'd ask one question,
97
00:04:37,075 --> 00:04:39,475
"What do we do when we
find the guilty party?"
98
00:04:39,811 --> 00:04:41,608
And if they said,
"Come down on them
99
00:04:41,680 --> 00:04:44,740
"with that swift hammer
of justice," innocent.
100
00:04:45,483 --> 00:04:47,917
A clear conscience
don't need no mercy.
101
00:04:48,553 --> 00:04:52,751
But if they said, "Officer Bessie,
well, they may have had a reason."
102
00:04:52,824 --> 00:04:54,724
Blah, blah, blah, blah...
103
00:04:54,926 --> 00:04:58,327
Well, nine times out of 10,
that's the anus they checked.
104
00:04:58,897 --> 00:05:00,762
So, say we catch
this whistleblower.
105
00:05:00,832 --> 00:05:02,026
What do you think
I should do with them?
106
00:05:02,100 --> 00:05:05,001
We should give them a
one-way ticket to Montego Bay.
107
00:05:05,737 --> 00:05:07,329
Where they keep
all the al-Qaeda.
108
00:05:08,740 --> 00:05:12,506
Uh, that's Guantanamo Bay. Yes.
109
00:05:12,744 --> 00:05:14,006
You put them in jail
for a long time,
110
00:05:14,079 --> 00:05:15,944
you put them in jail
for as long as you can.
111
00:05:16,014 --> 00:05:17,641
Well, I guess we're
all right, Michael.
112
00:05:17,982 --> 00:05:20,382
I want these people to really
pay. I want them to suffer.
113
00:05:21,086 --> 00:05:23,111
I'd prefer it
if they died.
114
00:05:23,188 --> 00:05:24,212
Because it's not right.
115
00:05:24,289 --> 00:05:25,381
Yeah.
Okay.
116
00:05:25,557 --> 00:05:27,525
Hey, Dwight.
Hey, IT guy.
117
00:05:27,892 --> 00:05:29,450
You mind if I get in
there for a second?
118
00:05:29,527 --> 00:05:30,892
Oh, sure thing,
go ahead.
119
00:05:32,964 --> 00:05:34,955
Just...
120
00:05:35,033 --> 00:05:36,398
Dwight, what the hell?
121
00:05:36,468 --> 00:05:38,629
Apache persuasion hold,
that's the hell.
122
00:05:38,703 --> 00:05:39,829
What are you doing
to my computer?
123
00:05:39,904 --> 00:05:43,203
The lawyers are searching our hard
drives for information on the leak.
124
00:05:43,408 --> 00:05:44,397
Thanks a lot, Big Brother.
125
00:05:44,476 --> 00:05:45,602
You're with Big Brother?
126
00:05:45,677 --> 00:05:47,440
Okay, go ahead.
I got nothing to hide.
127
00:05:47,979 --> 00:05:49,378
Wait, are they searching
all our computers?
128
00:05:49,447 --> 00:05:50,505
Yeah.
129
00:05:51,116 --> 00:05:53,209
I already
got to yours, Kev.
130
00:05:56,054 --> 00:05:59,217
No, that's cool.
Sometimes I run.
131
00:06:00,091 --> 00:06:01,649
I'm a runner.
132
00:06:02,260 --> 00:06:03,852
Everybody knows
it was Andy,
133
00:06:03,928 --> 00:06:07,728
and it is not fair for us all to take
the fall for his big, stupid mouth.
134
00:06:07,799 --> 00:06:09,790
Ridiculous, Angela.
135
00:06:09,868 --> 00:06:11,768
And like I'm going to believe
one of his spurned lovers.
136
00:06:12,270 --> 00:06:15,899
Look, he's been complaining about
this for a while. It's not crazy.
137
00:06:22,280 --> 00:06:23,872
Okay, Dwight.
Hold that thought.
138
00:06:23,948 --> 00:06:24,937
I don't want to
waste your time
139
00:06:25,016 --> 00:06:26,483
and I wouldn't
dare waste mine.
140
00:06:26,551 --> 00:06:27,609
I didn't do it.
141
00:06:27,685 --> 00:06:29,619
Now, I don't know
exactly who did it,
142
00:06:30,221 --> 00:06:33,088
but I have a list
right here.
143
00:06:34,025 --> 00:06:35,856
You should fire
the following people.
144
00:06:36,394 --> 00:06:37,793
Well, I'm inclined
to believe you.
145
00:06:37,862 --> 00:06:39,159
Why would I disparage
a company that has
146
00:06:39,230 --> 00:06:40,754
made me rich beyond
my wildest dreams?
147
00:06:40,832 --> 00:06:42,595
Yeah, I noticed
you've had a great year.
148
00:06:42,667 --> 00:06:44,134
Good boy.
149
00:06:44,202 --> 00:06:46,329
You turning that money
into more money?
150
00:06:49,007 --> 00:06:50,998
Are you referring
to alchemy?
151
00:06:51,910 --> 00:06:53,571
I don't like to tell a man
what to do with his money,
152
00:06:53,645 --> 00:06:55,078
but if you ain't
investing in property,
153
00:06:55,146 --> 00:06:56,477
then you're
dumber than a dummy.
154
00:06:56,681 --> 00:06:58,239
I'm not dumb, I'm smart.
155
00:06:58,416 --> 00:07:01,112
Well, buy property.
That's my advice.
156
00:07:03,087 --> 00:07:04,952
Is there something
that you would like to say to me?
157
00:07:05,557 --> 00:07:08,720
About talking to the
press? Uh, I do... No...
158
00:07:08,793 --> 00:07:11,353
I didn't do that. Okay?
159
00:07:12,530 --> 00:07:14,498
Didn't do it.
I don't believe you.
160
00:07:14,566 --> 00:07:17,535
I swear on the graves of my
parents who aren't even dead yet.
161
00:07:17,802 --> 00:07:19,827
That's a little much.
All right, all right.
162
00:07:19,904 --> 00:07:21,496
I don't care.
That's how much, I swear.
163
00:07:21,573 --> 00:07:23,063
Okay, I believe you.
I believe you.
164
00:07:23,308 --> 00:07:24,969
How come no one's
giving Darryl any crap?
165
00:07:25,109 --> 00:07:26,804
He was more bothered
about it than me.
166
00:07:29,781 --> 00:07:32,682
Did you tell anyone
outside of this office
167
00:07:33,251 --> 00:07:35,048
that the printers
were catching on fire?
168
00:07:37,388 --> 00:07:38,377
Yeah, I did.
169
00:07:39,791 --> 00:07:41,349
I was talking to
this girl at a bar.
170
00:07:41,659 --> 00:07:42,648
Oh, no, no, no.
171
00:07:43,061 --> 00:07:45,256
I think she could
sense my sadness.
172
00:07:45,330 --> 00:07:48,788
And I found out too late that
she was a copyeditor at the Trib.
173
00:07:48,867 --> 00:07:49,856
Oh, my God.
174
00:07:50,134 --> 00:07:51,123
Was she cute?
175
00:07:51,369 --> 00:07:54,133
No.
Oh, God, Darryl.
176
00:07:54,239 --> 00:07:57,436
I basically swore up and down
that none of my employees did it.
177
00:07:57,508 --> 00:07:59,874
And then I find out that
one of my best ones did.
178
00:08:00,378 --> 00:08:02,437
And now he's probably
going to get fired for it.
179
00:08:03,681 --> 00:08:07,208
And if that is not poetic
justice, I don't know what is.
180
00:08:09,187 --> 00:08:11,985
Sounds like you were as
blind-sided by this as I was.
181
00:08:12,056 --> 00:08:13,045
Yes.
182
00:08:13,124 --> 00:08:15,058
And we didn't find anything
on your computer.
183
00:08:15,260 --> 00:08:16,318
Good.
184
00:08:16,394 --> 00:08:17,793
Except this.
185
00:08:18,463 --> 00:08:22,763
Wow. This is just a mystery
novel that I've been working on.
186
00:08:22,967 --> 00:08:25,333
I know what it is.
I skimmed the first chapter.
187
00:08:25,470 --> 00:08:26,528
I'm just curious,
188
00:08:26,604 --> 00:08:28,595
why would a man
who hates people
189
00:08:28,673 --> 00:08:31,301
want to have
a relationship with a maid?
190
00:08:32,310 --> 00:08:33,800
I don't know...
The way I look at it,
191
00:08:33,878 --> 00:08:35,539
there's only one
of two reasons.
192
00:08:35,613 --> 00:08:38,548
He knows a secret about her
that she doesn't know herself.
193
00:08:40,285 --> 00:08:44,585
Or he wants to use her services
to mop up after a murder.
194
00:08:46,024 --> 00:08:47,184
Yes.
195
00:08:47,959 --> 00:08:49,620
Write your own damn novel.
196
00:08:50,762 --> 00:08:51,786
It was me.
197
00:08:52,030 --> 00:08:53,088
What was you?
198
00:08:54,499 --> 00:08:56,626
You were the leak?
Okay,
199
00:08:56,701 --> 00:08:58,100
I'm talking to this
woman at day care,
200
00:08:58,503 --> 00:09:01,700
she's telling me all about her amazing
trip to Vietnam. I have nothing.
201
00:09:01,773 --> 00:09:04,435
I tell her our printers
catch on fire spontaneously.
202
00:09:04,509 --> 00:09:05,567
Why'd you do that? Her
husband's a reporter.
203
00:09:05,643 --> 00:09:06,735
Yeah.
204
00:09:07,211 --> 00:09:09,771
So, now everyone hates Andy,
and it's this whole mess,
205
00:09:09,847 --> 00:09:12,008
and I don't know what
to do. Okay, just relax.
206
00:09:12,884 --> 00:09:14,283
Just need to relax.
207
00:09:14,485 --> 00:09:17,613
I could tell Jo,
or I could tell Michael.
208
00:09:18,756 --> 00:09:20,451
This is a very good idea.
This is good.
209
00:09:20,525 --> 00:09:23,119
Let's get all the bad ideas
out now. Flush them out.
210
00:09:23,328 --> 00:09:24,522
You leaked it?
211
00:09:24,595 --> 00:09:26,995
I don't know what to do.
Do I go tell Jo or...
212
00:09:27,065 --> 00:09:28,930
I don't want everyone to
keep blaming the wrong person.
213
00:09:29,000 --> 00:09:31,264
I don't know what
the best plan is, Pam.
214
00:09:32,470 --> 00:09:33,732
Oh, God.
215
00:09:34,305 --> 00:09:35,897
My mind is going
a mile an hour.
216
00:09:35,974 --> 00:09:37,305
That fast?
217
00:09:38,843 --> 00:09:41,311
Two whistleblowers. Two.
218
00:09:42,246 --> 00:09:43,235
I always thought
Darryl and Pam
219
00:09:43,314 --> 00:09:45,714
might get me fired
for something I said.
220
00:09:48,553 --> 00:09:49,542
Yeah?
221
00:09:58,296 --> 00:10:00,355
I weirdly know exactly
what you're saying to me.
222
00:10:00,531 --> 00:10:02,158
So, I'll see you in
Meredith's van in five minutes.
223
00:10:02,300 --> 00:10:04,029
Okay, you didn't need
to actually say that.
224
00:10:05,703 --> 00:10:07,933
I have never seen
so many parking tickets.
225
00:10:08,406 --> 00:10:10,067
All right,
this is just messed up.
226
00:10:10,141 --> 00:10:11,802
No, you know
what's messed up?
227
00:10:11,876 --> 00:10:15,107
This situation all up in
here is what's messed up.
228
00:10:15,179 --> 00:10:17,170
We need to brainstorm,
we need to get out of this.
229
00:10:17,248 --> 00:10:20,115
Brain-hurricane, come on.
Think. What have we got?
230
00:10:20,184 --> 00:10:21,276
Um...
231
00:10:22,286 --> 00:10:23,583
Hey, guys,
sorry I'm late.
232
00:10:23,654 --> 00:10:24,712
We're not going
for yogurt.
233
00:10:24,789 --> 00:10:27,314
It's okay, she's cool.
She also whistle-blew.
234
00:10:27,392 --> 00:10:29,986
Guys, I couldn't help it. It
is so boring where we work.
235
00:10:30,061 --> 00:10:31,926
I mean, it's as interesting
as a morgue.
236
00:10:32,063 --> 00:10:33,928
It might be less interesting
than a morgue.
237
00:10:34,132 --> 00:10:36,430
Hey, hey, it's as
interesting as a morgue.
238
00:10:36,601 --> 00:10:38,796
Of course I'm the leak.
I think I tweeted it.
239
00:10:39,070 --> 00:10:40,298
I can't control
what I say to people.
240
00:10:40,371 --> 00:10:41,497
I spend
the whole day talking.
241
00:10:41,572 --> 00:10:45,702
I mean, I video chat, I skype,
I text, I tweet, I phone, I woof.
242
00:10:46,144 --> 00:10:47,406
Woof is a site that
I'm launching to be
243
00:10:47,478 --> 00:10:49,105
the last word in
social networking.
244
00:10:49,180 --> 00:10:51,205
For just $12.99 a month,
Woof links up
245
00:10:51,282 --> 00:10:52,306
all your
communication portals,
246
00:10:52,383 --> 00:10:53,714
so you are
always within reach.
247
00:10:53,785 --> 00:10:55,275
It's part of the dog pack,
as I call it.
248
00:10:55,353 --> 00:10:58,151
But look, why tell you,
249
00:10:58,222 --> 00:11:00,782
when I can show you?
250
00:11:01,259 --> 00:11:03,284
I just sent myself a woof.
251
00:11:06,197 --> 00:11:07,596
Ryan,
you have a woof on line one.
252
00:11:07,665 --> 00:11:09,132
Thank you, Erin.
253
00:11:09,734 --> 00:11:10,826
Woof!
254
00:11:11,002 --> 00:11:15,098
Okay, here's what we do. I say
we just smash all the computers.
255
00:11:15,273 --> 00:11:17,571
We destroy the evidence.
No evidence, no case.
256
00:11:17,642 --> 00:11:19,940
Wouldn't we get fired for
smashing all the computers?
257
00:11:20,011 --> 00:11:23,208
No, okay, not all the
computers. Just our computers.
258
00:11:23,281 --> 00:11:24,839
That idea sucks. PAM: I don't
think that's a good idea.
259
00:11:24,916 --> 00:11:25,940
Just don't say no.
260
00:11:26,017 --> 00:11:28,781
Mike, you know you don't
have to turn us all in.
261
00:11:30,121 --> 00:11:32,089
All you need is
one scapegoat.
262
00:11:32,924 --> 00:11:34,915
Uh, if you turn me in,
I'm turning in Darryl.
263
00:11:35,093 --> 00:11:38,290
That's just what we need, another
black man in prison, you know?
264
00:11:38,362 --> 00:11:41,024
Nobody's going
to prison. Okay?
265
00:11:41,999 --> 00:11:45,730
All right, Michael, you need
to convince Jo to go easy on us.
266
00:11:45,803 --> 00:11:48,499
And then we'll all confess
once we know our jobs are safe.
267
00:11:48,940 --> 00:11:50,965
Okay, you can
count on me.
268
00:11:53,778 --> 00:11:55,177
Let me give you
a hand.
269
00:11:55,346 --> 00:11:56,540
Ready?
On three.
270
00:11:59,250 --> 00:12:01,047
Oh, shoot. Got it?
271
00:12:01,119 --> 00:12:02,347
Got it.
272
00:12:03,754 --> 00:12:04,778
Dwight Schrute.
273
00:12:04,856 --> 00:12:06,721
The property you're
looking at is in great shape.
274
00:12:06,791 --> 00:12:09,351
By the way, it has a very
spacious basement office.
275
00:12:09,660 --> 00:12:12,993
Basement office?
You mean like a lair?
276
00:12:14,532 --> 00:12:16,591
Hey, Jo.
Michael.
277
00:12:17,568 --> 00:12:19,502
I was thinking about
our little leak problem.
278
00:12:19,570 --> 00:12:20,764
I was up all lunch
thinking about
279
00:12:20,838 --> 00:12:22,669
what we should do
to this individual.
280
00:12:23,708 --> 00:12:25,505
You know what I
think we should do?
281
00:12:25,576 --> 00:12:29,034
We make them come to
work. And we work them,
282
00:12:29,113 --> 00:12:32,412
and we make them sit next to
all the people they screwed over.
283
00:12:32,984 --> 00:12:35,043
And we pay them,
284
00:12:35,119 --> 00:12:39,579
but we make them feel like
they did something really wrong.
285
00:12:39,724 --> 00:12:42,090
The one question I have is, "Do
we give them a Christmas bonus?"
286
00:12:42,260 --> 00:12:44,785
I say yes, it's Christmas,
287
00:12:44,862 --> 00:12:48,161
but right after, they're
back into the thick of it.
288
00:12:48,232 --> 00:12:49,859
Michael Scott.
289
00:12:51,202 --> 00:12:52,601
What do you know?
290
00:12:53,371 --> 00:12:54,565
What?
291
00:12:55,640 --> 00:12:56,937
It doesn't matter
what I know.
292
00:12:57,008 --> 00:12:59,101
If it doesn't matter, then tell me. Why?
293
00:12:59,177 --> 00:13:01,702
Because I wanna deal with it
the way I deal with it.
294
00:13:01,779 --> 00:13:03,576
Well, deal with this.
295
00:13:05,550 --> 00:13:07,415
Empathize with me
for a moment.
296
00:13:07,485 --> 00:13:09,112
I came up here
with a big problem,
297
00:13:09,187 --> 00:13:11,052
and now,
I've got a branch manager
298
00:13:11,122 --> 00:13:12,885
who's giving me
the silent treatment.
299
00:13:14,559 --> 00:13:15,719
Speak to me.
300
00:13:17,094 --> 00:13:18,083
Speak.
301
00:13:22,466 --> 00:13:23,660
Come with me.
302
00:13:24,235 --> 00:13:25,224
What?
303
00:13:28,172 --> 00:13:32,575
Are you leaving? Oh, my. Should
I continue with the investigation?
304
00:13:46,123 --> 00:13:47,647
Are you gonna kill me?
305
00:13:53,664 --> 00:13:55,655
I just need you to come
by later and sign a few forms.
306
00:13:55,733 --> 00:13:58,031
Okay. What time works for you?
307
00:13:59,470 --> 00:14:02,132
Mr. Schrute? What time works?
308
00:14:05,376 --> 00:14:09,676
Cancel it. I want you to make
an offer at 1725 Slough Avenue.
309
00:14:10,514 --> 00:14:12,675
Make them an offer
they can't refuse.
310
00:14:12,750 --> 00:14:15,184
No, on second thought,
lowball them.
311
00:14:15,987 --> 00:14:17,750
Don't call me
till you have it.
312
00:14:17,822 --> 00:14:18,880
But...
313
00:14:20,858 --> 00:14:22,450
Are we going
someplace far away?
314
00:14:22,526 --> 00:14:24,721
I know you said
no questions,
315
00:14:27,531 --> 00:14:30,056
but I have an early dinner
that I need to get to.
316
00:14:31,736 --> 00:14:33,203
With the chief of police.
317
00:14:33,771 --> 00:14:36,137
I'm very relieved
to learn it wasn't you.
318
00:14:37,208 --> 00:14:39,506
All right.
Stan, you're up.
319
00:14:39,777 --> 00:14:41,074
It wasn't me.
320
00:14:41,846 --> 00:14:44,144
What a rich timbre
your voice has.
321
00:14:44,715 --> 00:14:47,775
Okay, I am prepared to
conclude the investigation.
322
00:14:49,020 --> 00:14:50,920
And?
You did it.
323
00:14:51,622 --> 00:14:54,147
What? Based on what?
324
00:14:54,592 --> 00:14:58,153
Just all the evidence. And it
really seems like it was you.
325
00:14:58,863 --> 00:15:00,797
Can we all agree to say
that it was Andy for now
326
00:15:00,865 --> 00:15:02,924
and sit with it,
see how it feels?
327
00:15:03,000 --> 00:15:04,399
All right, sounds good. Okay.
328
00:15:04,468 --> 00:15:06,231
Guys, I think that
seems a little unfair.
329
00:15:06,304 --> 00:15:08,499
I mean, I feel like we don't
definitely know it was Andy.
330
00:15:08,572 --> 00:15:13,168
Yeah, you know? I mean, for all
we know, it could have been Jim.
331
00:15:14,045 --> 00:15:15,069
Really?
332
00:15:15,146 --> 00:15:16,704
Michael.
I have rights.
333
00:15:17,281 --> 00:15:18,373
Let's just talk.
334
00:15:18,449 --> 00:15:20,144
I am not going to
tell you anything.
335
00:15:20,618 --> 00:15:23,451
Honey, you don't seem
like your normal self.
336
00:15:24,822 --> 00:15:26,756
Well, I'm going through a
little bit of a rough patch.
337
00:15:26,824 --> 00:15:28,815
Mama Jo knew
there was something up.
338
00:15:28,893 --> 00:15:30,758
The whole year, actually.
339
00:15:31,696 --> 00:15:33,561
My favorite restaurant closed down. Oh.
340
00:15:33,998 --> 00:15:35,226
I hate that.
341
00:15:35,299 --> 00:15:37,859
And my new favorite
restaurant sucks.
342
00:15:40,705 --> 00:15:42,673
I bought a video camera
last year
343
00:15:42,740 --> 00:15:44,469
and I was looking
at the tapes,
344
00:15:44,775 --> 00:15:48,643
and there were only, like, 12
minutes that I felt was worth taping.
345
00:15:48,713 --> 00:15:50,237
The whole year.
346
00:15:50,815 --> 00:15:53,215
And most of that was just
birds in my condo complex.
347
00:15:53,684 --> 00:15:54,878
What is that?
348
00:15:57,722 --> 00:15:59,155
And I miss Holly.
349
00:15:59,757 --> 00:16:01,190
Who's Holly?
350
00:16:01,359 --> 00:16:04,089
Holly Flax.
From the Nashua branch.
351
00:16:04,729 --> 00:16:07,254
Best HR rep that Dunder
Mifflin has ever seen.
352
00:16:10,334 --> 00:16:12,734
It has not been a blockbuster
year for me financially.
353
00:16:13,170 --> 00:16:15,070
My Blockbuster
stock is down.
354
00:16:15,840 --> 00:16:18,274
I think that
the real question is,
355
00:16:19,176 --> 00:16:20,973
"Who is the whistleblower?"
356
00:16:21,645 --> 00:16:22,634
Just...
357
00:16:22,980 --> 00:16:25,540
I may have heard from an old
client and I may have immediately
358
00:16:25,616 --> 00:16:29,074
started spreading the news to other
clients and potential clients, yeah.
359
00:16:29,987 --> 00:16:31,352
But I'm not here
to talk about that.
360
00:16:31,422 --> 00:16:34,858
I'm here to talk
about Suck lt. Suck lt...
361
00:16:34,925 --> 00:16:38,122
Gabe, I told you all
about the printers.
362
00:16:38,195 --> 00:16:39,355
I mean,
it could be you, Gabe.
363
00:16:39,730 --> 00:16:41,197
Yes, it's totally obvious.
I mean, that's the point.
364
00:16:41,298 --> 00:16:44,631
I think we all can agree
it's either Gabe or Angela.
365
00:16:45,236 --> 00:16:46,828
It's Angela.
Get her, boys.
366
00:16:47,438 --> 00:16:49,565
Hey, guys.
Sorry to interrupt.
367
00:16:49,640 --> 00:16:51,232
I just wanted to say
goodbye to everyone.
368
00:16:51,308 --> 00:16:52,536
Through Teach For America,
369
00:16:52,610 --> 00:16:53,634
I'm going to go
down to Detroit
370
00:16:53,711 --> 00:16:55,611
and teach inner-city kids
about computers.
371
00:16:56,247 --> 00:16:57,646
Not now. NICK: Yeah,
it's just that my friends
372
00:16:57,715 --> 00:16:59,740
are in the car waiting,
so I thought I'd...
373
00:16:59,950 --> 00:17:02,180
Phyllis, what's
this guy's name again?
374
00:17:02,319 --> 00:17:05,618
I don't know. Is it Shadow or
Garth? It's something weird, I...
375
00:17:05,790 --> 00:17:06,882
My name is Nick.
376
00:17:06,957 --> 00:17:09,790
Okay, well, "Nick,"
we're in a meeting.
377
00:17:10,161 --> 00:17:14,154
Okay, look, I get it, people. I'm the
lame IT guy and everybody hates me.
378
00:17:14,565 --> 00:17:16,192
Hey, listen, man, you
can't take it personally.
379
00:17:16,567 --> 00:17:18,558
You call me "man"?
I just said my name,
380
00:17:18,636 --> 00:17:20,263
just now. Did you
forget it already?
381
00:17:20,337 --> 00:17:21,326
No,
382
00:17:22,506 --> 00:17:23,564
sport.
383
00:17:24,275 --> 00:17:26,869
You guys have 15 parties a
week. You can't learn my name?
384
00:17:26,944 --> 00:17:29,378
Hey, hey, hey, IT guy.
385
00:17:29,447 --> 00:17:30,709
Here's the story, champ.
386
00:17:30,781 --> 00:17:32,646
None of us have spent a lot of
time getting to know you, okay?
387
00:17:32,716 --> 00:17:36,277
We liked the last guy, Sadiq,
because he kept to himself.
388
00:17:36,353 --> 00:17:37,945
And we also thought he
might have been a terrorist.
389
00:17:38,189 --> 00:17:40,214
You know what? I'm going to
leave you with one other thought.
390
00:17:40,291 --> 00:17:43,818
Inner-city kids use computers
for two things, games and porn.
391
00:17:43,894 --> 00:17:46,727
So, good luck
wasting your life, Lurch.
392
00:17:46,797 --> 00:17:48,264
Thank you so much for that.
393
00:17:48,332 --> 00:17:50,323
I saw all of your hard
drives. And guess what?
394
00:17:50,968 --> 00:17:53,869
You're not a photographer. And you
definitely can't fit into a size two.
395
00:17:53,938 --> 00:17:55,565
Darryl, man,
you're on Facebook.
396
00:17:55,639 --> 00:17:57,334
Why have you been telling
people you're not on Facebook?
397
00:17:57,575 --> 00:17:59,236
People want to be your
friend, man. KELLY: Hey.
398
00:17:59,610 --> 00:18:01,976
All right?
And you... This guy.
399
00:18:02,146 --> 00:18:03,238
You're the one
who told the press.
400
00:18:03,314 --> 00:18:04,645
You wrote
an e-mail to the editor.
401
00:18:04,715 --> 00:18:06,740
I saw it and I also
saw a Quicktime movie
402
00:18:06,817 --> 00:18:09,183
of your little printer fire
test on your hard drive.
403
00:18:09,253 --> 00:18:12,484
This guy's the snitch, he's the
snitch. So, that's it. Check it out.
404
00:18:15,226 --> 00:18:17,160
We're going to
believe that guy?
405
00:18:18,095 --> 00:18:19,756
When I was growing up,
406
00:18:19,830 --> 00:18:23,493
there was nothing better than
being a big old business tycoon.
407
00:18:24,335 --> 00:18:26,462
And I thought I'd
break that glass ceiling
408
00:18:26,537 --> 00:18:29,734
and be a hero to all those
little girls out there.
409
00:18:30,674 --> 00:18:32,733
And they'd make
a Barbie out of me.
410
00:18:35,279 --> 00:18:37,577
I hate that
I sell cheap printers.
411
00:18:38,716 --> 00:18:39,808
I do.
412
00:18:41,085 --> 00:18:43,110
But if I have to go out
there in front of the press
413
00:18:43,187 --> 00:18:46,384
and make one of them
public apology recalls,
414
00:18:46,457 --> 00:18:50,951
I mean, that's all I'll
ever be remembered for.
415
00:18:51,562 --> 00:18:53,689
Nobody will want to
play with my Barbie.
416
00:18:56,433 --> 00:18:58,458
Well, you know,
I would be willing,
417
00:18:58,536 --> 00:19:00,094
under the right
circumstances,
418
00:19:00,170 --> 00:19:01,728
to do that for you.
419
00:19:01,839 --> 00:19:05,104
Oh, honey, surely
you don't want that.
420
00:19:07,411 --> 00:19:10,107
I surely do,
and don't call me honey.
421
00:19:16,487 --> 00:19:17,784
Airplane II.
422
00:19:18,055 --> 00:19:20,114
I'm about to buy
this building, you know?
423
00:19:21,725 --> 00:19:23,249
You don't say.
424
00:19:23,627 --> 00:19:26,790
I own a one-eighth share in a
rental property down in Pittston.
425
00:19:27,064 --> 00:19:29,589
Well, I'm one-eighths
proud of you.
426
00:19:31,602 --> 00:19:33,229
Enjoy that chair for now.
427
00:19:34,471 --> 00:19:37,668
'Cause pretty soon you
will be on your feet.
428
00:19:38,175 --> 00:19:39,802
Like Buckingham Palace.
429
00:19:45,015 --> 00:19:46,915
Hey, Phyllis,
have you seen my bag?
430
00:19:48,953 --> 00:19:50,215
You deserve it.
431
00:19:51,121 --> 00:19:53,817
Look, I didn't want
houses and schools
432
00:19:53,891 --> 00:19:56,291
to burn down
and children to die.
433
00:19:58,095 --> 00:19:59,426
Does that make me a hero?
434
00:19:59,496 --> 00:20:01,361
No, it does not.
435
00:20:03,801 --> 00:20:06,463
Well, it doesn't make me the
worst guy in the world, either.
436
00:20:06,537 --> 00:20:07,765
It does!
437
00:20:10,274 --> 00:20:12,139
Andy?
Hey.
438
00:20:12,576 --> 00:20:17,377
I wanted to say that I think it was
very brave of you to go to the press.
439
00:20:24,888 --> 00:20:26,185
Thanks.
440
00:20:27,024 --> 00:20:28,821
Yeah, you know.
441
00:20:30,060 --> 00:20:32,051
Just seemed like
the right thing to do.
442
00:20:32,129 --> 00:20:33,118
Yeah.
443
00:20:38,869 --> 00:20:40,530
"We at Sabre have
betrayed the trust
444
00:20:40,604 --> 00:20:42,731
"that we have built
with our customers.
445
00:20:42,806 --> 00:20:46,902
"We regret our slow response and
our lapse in candor and judgment.
446
00:20:47,478 --> 00:20:52,438
"At this time, we are issuing a full
recall of all Sabre GH400 printers.
447
00:20:53,183 --> 00:20:55,617
"We will not rest until
this problem is solved.
448
00:20:55,753 --> 00:20:59,052
"There will be no questions."
Are there any questions?
449
00:21:04,662 --> 00:21:07,961
Hey, I appreciate you reading that
statement. You looked pretty up there.
450
00:21:08,032 --> 00:21:09,226
That was fun.
451
00:21:09,299 --> 00:21:11,096
I hope your rough patch
ends soon.
452
00:21:11,168 --> 00:21:12,499
Thanks. Today helped.
453
00:21:13,003 --> 00:21:15,665
Well, give a shout
if I can brighten your life.
454
00:21:15,939 --> 00:21:19,033
Okay. Hey, you could transfer
Holly back from Nashua.
455
00:21:21,712 --> 00:21:22,974
Let me see what I can do.