1
00:00:05,805 --> 00:00:08,035
What?
Oh, nothing.

2
00:00:09,809 --> 00:00:11,640
Pam's on vacation

3
00:00:11,711 --> 00:00:14,703
and she gets back tomorrow,
so it'll be nice to see her.

4
00:00:14,781 --> 00:00:15,839
It'll be nice.

5
00:00:15,915 --> 00:00:18,975
And she set a date
for the wedding with Roy.

6
00:00:19,552 --> 00:00:22,612
June. Summer.
So, that'll be nice.

7
00:00:23,823 --> 00:00:25,347
And that's that.

8
00:00:28,461 --> 00:00:31,123
What?
Oh, nothing.

9
00:00:33,666 --> 00:00:37,602
Jim's been looking at me,
kind of, a lot all week.

10
00:00:38,671 --> 00:00:40,298
I would be creeped out by it,

11
00:00:40,373 --> 00:00:43,740
but it's nothing compared to
the way Michael looks at me.

12
00:01:28,354 --> 00:01:29,719
Spamster!

13
00:01:32,392 --> 00:01:34,622
Pam, plus Spam, plus...

14
00:01:34,694 --> 00:01:35,956
Hamster.
Right.

15
00:01:36,029 --> 00:01:38,259
Welcome back. How was your
vacation? It was great.

16
00:01:38,331 --> 00:01:40,128
Yeah? Did you get lucky?

17
00:01:41,334 --> 00:01:42,460
Boink.

18
00:01:42,535 --> 00:01:45,026
Roy and I just got back
from the Poconos.

19
00:01:45,505 --> 00:01:47,473
I get 10 vacation days a year

20
00:01:47,540 --> 00:01:50,941
and I try to hold off taking
them for as long as possible.

21
00:01:51,211 --> 00:01:54,703
And this year I got to
the third week in January.

22
00:01:56,082 --> 00:01:58,880
"I am Pam. " Spicoli guy.

23
00:01:59,385 --> 00:02:01,319
Oh, God.

24
00:02:01,688 --> 00:02:03,383
Names, numbers. Okay.

25
00:02:03,456 --> 00:02:06,425
Whoa! God! Yuck! Yuck! Yuck!

26
00:02:06,526 --> 00:02:08,960
What? Yuck! Wow, what happened in there?

27
00:02:09,028 --> 00:02:12,520
I don't know. There is
stink in there. My God.

28
00:02:12,799 --> 00:02:14,562
What is that?

29
00:02:14,934 --> 00:02:16,902
Oh, I don't know.
Is that a bird?

30
00:02:16,970 --> 00:02:19,803
No, I don't think it's a bird. Oh, God.

31
00:02:19,873 --> 00:02:23,741
How could that happen? How could...
Right in the middle of the carpet.

32
00:02:23,810 --> 00:02:24,936
What's going on?

33
00:02:25,011 --> 00:02:28,105
Somebody vomited right in the
middle of the carpet in my office.

34
00:02:28,181 --> 00:02:30,979
I don't think that's vomit.
Check it out.

35
00:02:31,050 --> 00:02:32,745
Me?
Check it out.

36
00:02:35,355 --> 00:02:38,654
Don't be a wuss. Just get...
No, I'm not holding your coffee.

37
00:02:38,725 --> 00:02:40,716
Tell me what it is.
Oh, that's ridiculous.

38
00:02:40,793 --> 00:02:42,090
What is it?

39
00:02:43,062 --> 00:02:44,393
Michael.
What is it?

40
00:02:44,464 --> 00:02:45,863
No, just tell me what it is!

41
00:02:45,932 --> 00:02:49,629
Michael, I gotta get out of here.
I can't hold my breath that long.

42
00:02:49,702 --> 00:02:51,067
Open the door up.

43
00:02:51,437 --> 00:02:53,371
It smelled terrible.

44
00:02:58,278 --> 00:02:59,802
Oh!
Jeez...

45
00:03:00,246 --> 00:03:01,645
Oh, no...

46
00:03:03,583 --> 00:03:05,813
I cannot believe a pipe
burst and left that there.

47
00:03:05,885 --> 00:03:08,945
That's no burst pipe. How do
you know that? What is it then?

48
00:03:09,022 --> 00:03:11,354
Hey, guys.
Somebody making soup?

49
00:03:14,928 --> 00:03:18,056
Here she comes.
All clean? Great.

50
00:03:21,701 --> 00:03:23,692
It's still stinky.
That is worse.

51
00:03:23,770 --> 00:03:27,228
She probably scrubbed it
into the fibers of the carpet.

52
00:03:27,440 --> 00:03:29,067
Total permeation.

53
00:03:29,175 --> 00:03:31,200
I am a big Fear Factor fan.

54
00:03:31,978 --> 00:03:34,845
I'm a big fan of anything
Joe Rogan does, actually.

55
00:03:35,048 --> 00:03:37,710
So this is sort of
like my audition tape.

56
00:03:42,555 --> 00:03:46,184
I can't stand it. I can't stay
in here another second.

57
00:03:46,426 --> 00:03:47,552
No!

58
00:03:49,896 --> 00:03:52,592
Hey. Welcome back.
Thanks!

59
00:03:52,665 --> 00:03:56,567
So, how was the resort?
Did you ski a lot? A little.

60
00:03:57,737 --> 00:03:58,897
Good.

61
00:04:00,073 --> 00:04:01,768
What's going on in here?

62
00:04:03,743 --> 00:04:06,143
What? I did not do that.

63
00:04:07,213 --> 00:04:08,874
That sounds disgusting.

64
00:04:10,216 --> 00:04:11,706
It wasn't me.

65
00:04:13,987 --> 00:04:16,547
It wasn't me. It was not me.

66
00:04:18,091 --> 00:04:19,080
Oh.

67
00:04:20,493 --> 00:04:21,755
Wow.

68
00:04:27,367 --> 00:04:28,391
Hey, Jim.

69
00:04:28,468 --> 00:04:32,234
I thought that we would be desk
buddies while they changed my carpet.

70
00:04:32,872 --> 00:04:35,773
That might be a little
difficult with the one computer.

71
00:04:35,842 --> 00:04:37,332
Oh, it's...

72
00:04:37,410 --> 00:04:40,311
There's definitely a desk
open in the back. Yeah.

73
00:04:42,315 --> 00:04:43,577
Which I guess I'll be taking.

74
00:04:43,650 --> 00:04:45,242
No, no, no. Seriously,
I don't mind sharing.

75
00:04:45,318 --> 00:04:48,219
No, no, no. Seriously,
I'll be in the back.

76
00:04:52,058 --> 00:04:53,525
Hey, Kelly.

77
00:04:55,161 --> 00:04:56,822
Are you moving back here?

78
00:04:56,896 --> 00:04:59,763
Just for the day,
while Michael's at my desk.

79
00:04:59,832 --> 00:05:01,459
Because Toby
used to sit there,

80
00:05:01,534 --> 00:05:04,526
but then he had to move over
there because of an allergy.

81
00:05:04,604 --> 00:05:07,767
Allergy to... the desk?

82
00:05:08,474 --> 00:05:09,771
Weird.

83
00:05:10,977 --> 00:05:14,208
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Old bullpen.

84
00:05:15,348 --> 00:05:18,078
The old bullpen.
Don't ape me.

85
00:05:18,151 --> 00:05:19,175
Okay.

86
00:05:19,252 --> 00:05:21,777
This is great.
Yeah.

87
00:05:22,121 --> 00:05:24,089
The pressures
of my office are insane.

88
00:05:24,157 --> 00:05:27,854
I just... You couldn't understand, but
man, you guys have it easy out here.

89
00:05:27,927 --> 00:05:30,293
You know, I used
to sit right here?

90
00:05:30,363 --> 00:05:31,830
No way.
Yeah.

91
00:05:32,165 --> 00:05:34,133
And who had your office?

92
00:05:35,068 --> 00:05:36,399
Ed Truck.

93
00:05:37,603 --> 00:05:41,596
Ed Truck was the manager before
me. Horrible. He hated fun.

94
00:05:41,808 --> 00:05:45,107
It was like, "Oh, Ed Truck is
walking toward us, so stop having fun.

95
00:05:45,178 --> 00:05:47,112
"Start pretending to do work. "

96
00:05:47,613 --> 00:05:49,672
What a jerk. He's...

97
00:05:49,982 --> 00:05:52,280
You know what?
I swore to myself

98
00:05:52,352 --> 00:05:54,547
that if I ever got to walk
around the room as manager,

99
00:05:54,620 --> 00:05:56,952
people would laugh
when they saw me coming

100
00:05:57,023 --> 00:05:59,753
and would applaud
as I walked away.

101
00:06:00,026 --> 00:06:03,223
I'm serious. My closet doors
will not shut.

102
00:06:03,296 --> 00:06:06,697
I mean, it only takes so long to measure
to make sure that clothes will hang up.

103
00:06:06,766 --> 00:06:08,927
'Cause aren't all hangers,
like, that big?

104
00:06:09,001 --> 00:06:11,731
So I don't understand why the
closet engineer didn't think of that.

105
00:06:11,804 --> 00:06:13,362
So now I'm doing
this new thing

106
00:06:13,439 --> 00:06:15,464
where I just leave piles
of clothes on the floor

107
00:06:15,541 --> 00:06:17,702
and I walk around the piles
to get an outfit...

108
00:06:18,211 --> 00:06:19,576
You know who used
to sit at that desk?

109
00:06:19,645 --> 00:06:22,773
That guy Miles, who quit
to form his own company?

110
00:06:23,282 --> 00:06:24,579
Todd Packer.
No.

111
00:06:24,650 --> 00:06:26,117
Yeah. I thought he was out on the road.

112
00:06:26,185 --> 00:06:27,846
He was, but

113
00:06:28,554 --> 00:06:31,785
that desk was empty. He'd come
in and sit there sometimes.

114
00:06:34,761 --> 00:06:38,094
When I was in training, many
years ago, not so long ago,

115
00:06:38,898 --> 00:06:42,334
I worked side-by-side with
a fellow named Todd Packer.

116
00:06:42,935 --> 00:06:45,335
And together
we rocked the office.

117
00:06:48,808 --> 00:06:52,403
Packer and I once spent a
whole day with our pants off.

118
00:06:52,712 --> 00:06:55,545
And when people noticed, we
convinced them that they were crazy.

119
00:06:55,615 --> 00:06:58,607
I will gladly pay you Tuesday
for a hamburger today.

120
00:06:58,684 --> 00:07:00,481
Excuse me one second, please?

121
00:07:00,553 --> 00:07:03,215
What is it that you need
right now that can't wait

122
00:07:03,289 --> 00:07:05,018
until I'm off the phone
with a customer?

123
00:07:05,091 --> 00:07:07,889
A customer.
Well, sound the alarm.

124
00:07:09,162 --> 00:07:10,288
Okay.

125
00:07:10,363 --> 00:07:14,026
Another time, Packer held this guy's
head in the toilet for like, a minute.

126
00:07:14,100 --> 00:07:17,126
The guy had no sense of humor about
it. Probably why he wasn't hired.

127
00:07:18,538 --> 00:07:20,836
What did you hit me for?
Charley horse!

128
00:07:20,907 --> 00:07:22,431
What?
Charley horse!

129
00:07:22,508 --> 00:07:24,476
You shouldn't have
hit me, Michael. Okay.

130
00:07:24,544 --> 00:07:28,742
Once, as a joke, Packer banged
every chick in the office.

131
00:07:28,948 --> 00:07:30,677
It was hysterical.

132
00:07:31,818 --> 00:07:35,811
Beyonce, pink the color,
Pink the person,

133
00:07:35,988 --> 00:07:38,923
hot dogs, basically
anything that is awesome.

134
00:07:39,292 --> 00:07:40,987
Snow cones...
Hey, Jim,

135
00:07:41,060 --> 00:07:44,689
Michael wanted me to ask you
how to raise your desk chair.

136
00:07:44,964 --> 00:07:48,559
It's the lever on the side.
That's what I told him. Thanks.

137
00:07:53,306 --> 00:07:56,537
Oh, my God, he is so cute.

138
00:07:57,176 --> 00:08:00,077
Would you talk to him for me
and see if he likes me?

139
00:08:01,180 --> 00:08:04,707
No, I don't think I can... Oh,
please, Jim. Please, please, Jim.

140
00:08:04,784 --> 00:08:07,844
Please, please, please, he's
so cute. I like him so much.

141
00:08:07,920 --> 00:08:11,788
And I would do it, but I'm too shy.
Please, Jim. Please, please, please.

142
00:08:11,858 --> 00:08:14,656
Please, Jim. Please,
please, please.

143
00:08:14,961 --> 00:08:17,054
Dwight?
Michael.

144
00:08:18,164 --> 00:08:20,189
Let's send up Accounting.

145
00:08:21,367 --> 00:08:24,063
What? Old-fashioned
raid. Sales on Accounting.

146
00:08:24,837 --> 00:08:26,668
Yeah, follow my lead.

147
00:08:29,642 --> 00:08:30,870
Hey, guys.

148
00:08:30,977 --> 00:08:32,638
Hey, Michael.
What's up?

149
00:08:32,712 --> 00:08:33,701
Hey, Dwight.

150
00:08:42,722 --> 00:08:44,883
Come on, come on,
come on, come on!

151
00:08:47,293 --> 00:08:49,227
Sales rules!
Yes!

152
00:08:49,295 --> 00:08:51,160
Yeah!
Yeah!

153
00:08:53,666 --> 00:08:55,190
Should we help them
pick up their stuff?

154
00:08:55,268 --> 00:08:57,236
No, no, no, no. We don't
do that. We don't do that.

155
00:08:57,303 --> 00:08:59,999
Okay.
Watch out, Pam. You're next.

156
00:09:00,072 --> 00:09:01,539
You're gonna throw
my things on the ground?

157
00:09:01,607 --> 00:09:02,904
Maybe.

158
00:09:03,809 --> 00:09:05,970
What happened in
Michael's office was wrong.

159
00:09:06,045 --> 00:09:08,240
I understand it.
It makes sense.

160
00:09:11,484 --> 00:09:13,679
But it was still wrong.

161
00:09:14,053 --> 00:09:17,454
Why would somebody ruin
a perfectly good carpet?

162
00:09:18,457 --> 00:09:19,924
I don't know.

163
00:09:22,094 --> 00:09:25,791
It could be done out of hate.
It could be done out of love.

164
00:09:26,165 --> 00:09:28,463
It could be
completely neutral.

165
00:09:29,001 --> 00:09:30,992
Maybe somebody hates
the cleaning lady.

166
00:09:31,070 --> 00:09:33,903
And, well, she doesn't do
a very good job, obviously,

167
00:09:33,973 --> 00:09:38,239
because my office still reeks
like you would not believe.

168
00:09:39,278 --> 00:09:40,643
I hate her.

169
00:09:44,951 --> 00:09:49,183
You know what? I am beginning to
think that what happened to my carpet

170
00:09:49,522 --> 00:09:52,650
was an act of terrorism
against the office.

171
00:09:53,025 --> 00:09:54,993
The only thing that
makes any sense.

172
00:09:55,061 --> 00:09:57,154
Hello, am I the 107th caller?

173
00:10:00,333 --> 00:10:03,029
Hello, Rock 107,
am I the 107th caller?

174
00:10:06,372 --> 00:10:09,034
Hello, Rock 107,
am I the 107th caller?

175
00:10:10,509 --> 00:10:13,069
I'm totally gonna win
us that box set. Stop.

176
00:10:13,145 --> 00:10:15,136
Jethro Tull...
Stop it.

177
00:10:16,983 --> 00:10:18,450
Stop it.

178
00:10:21,120 --> 00:10:22,280
Don't.

179
00:10:23,222 --> 00:10:24,484
Don't.

180
00:10:24,890 --> 00:10:27,017
I need to make a sales call.

181
00:10:28,828 --> 00:10:30,796
Please?
All right.

182
00:10:41,140 --> 00:10:43,005
Am I the 107th caller?

183
00:10:43,976 --> 00:10:46,240
Back so soon.
We can go back.

184
00:10:46,312 --> 00:10:48,177
We can go back in, like,
a couple of weeks maybe.

185
00:10:48,247 --> 00:10:50,943
Yeah, right. Okay, maybe another month,

186
00:10:51,017 --> 00:10:53,212
like, maybe for, like,
Presidents' Day or something?

187
00:10:53,285 --> 00:10:55,310
Yeah, that's right. We
could do a three-day weekend.

188
00:10:55,388 --> 00:10:58,255
I wonder if I could, like,
call in sick on the Friday.

189
00:10:58,324 --> 00:10:59,689
Then I get
a four-day weekend.

190
00:11:01,260 --> 00:11:02,488
And when I wake up,
I feel fine.

191
00:11:02,561 --> 00:11:04,290
But it's so weird to fall
asleep. And I just hate it

192
00:11:04,363 --> 00:11:07,332
'cause I try to go to bed at,
like, 9:30. Are you kidding?

193
00:11:07,400 --> 00:11:08,765
No.
Hi, guys.

194
00:11:08,834 --> 00:11:11,564
We haven't finished getting things
in order from your last visit.

195
00:11:11,637 --> 00:11:12,729
I'm just walking around.

196
00:11:12,805 --> 00:11:14,170
Were you?
Well, yeah.

197
00:11:14,240 --> 00:11:16,333
It's just that we're really
swamped over here, Michael.

198
00:11:16,409 --> 00:11:18,206
Oh, and I'm not?
Why would you say that?

199
00:11:18,277 --> 00:11:19,642
Because I'm having fun?

200
00:11:19,712 --> 00:11:22,738
You guys just are working
for the weekend, aren't you?

201
00:11:22,815 --> 00:11:24,180
I am working for the week.

202
00:11:24,250 --> 00:11:28,550
Sales team. Listen to me.
This is what we're gonna do.

203
00:11:29,321 --> 00:11:31,789
I'm gonna up the ante
a little bit, literally.

204
00:11:31,857 --> 00:11:34,348
Right here I'm gonna
put a crisp $100 bill.

205
00:11:34,427 --> 00:11:37,419
The person with the most sales at the
end of the day gets to keep the cash.

206
00:11:37,496 --> 00:11:38,986
Sound good?
Yeah!

207
00:11:39,065 --> 00:11:41,295
Seventy, eighty,
one, two, three.

208
00:11:41,734 --> 00:11:45,670
$83. Still a lot of money
and I'm going to...

209
00:11:46,806 --> 00:11:51,209
I'm gonna leave it right over
here where everybody can see it.

210
00:11:52,044 --> 00:11:55,207
I will be taking
Jim's clients today

211
00:11:55,281 --> 00:11:59,115
because he is not here, and out
of sight. Out of the contest.

212
00:11:59,185 --> 00:12:01,312
Let's see who winds up
with the cash, shall we?

213
00:12:01,387 --> 00:12:02,911
You're gonna compete
against us?

214
00:12:02,988 --> 00:12:04,751
Oh, it is on, Phyllis.
It is so on!

215
00:12:04,824 --> 00:12:07,224
It is so on!
God, this is gonna be fun.

216
00:12:08,828 --> 00:12:11,558
Michael is gonna
wipe the floor with us.

217
00:12:20,940 --> 00:12:23,704
So, you have
40 boxes going out

218
00:12:23,776 --> 00:12:26,244
and I will deliver those
personally in a Sebring.

219
00:12:26,312 --> 00:12:29,179
Very good. Nice doing
business with you. Thank you.

220
00:12:29,448 --> 00:12:31,109
Yes!

221
00:12:31,450 --> 00:12:33,111
Oh! Yeah.

222
00:12:33,285 --> 00:12:36,812
Read it and weep.
Oh! Oh, look at that!

223
00:12:36,922 --> 00:12:40,187
Look at me, Phyllis! Oh,
what is that? That's my sale!

224
00:12:48,033 --> 00:12:49,898
What's that? What are
you doing? Nothing.

225
00:12:49,969 --> 00:12:51,994
I think he's dancing.
No, just...

226
00:12:52,071 --> 00:12:53,436
That was definitely
not dancing.

227
00:12:53,506 --> 00:12:55,269
You know what, guys?
It's none of your concern.

228
00:12:55,341 --> 00:12:56,808
It was official business,
so just...

229
00:12:56,876 --> 00:12:58,309
Paper business.
Yeah, paper business.

230
00:12:58,377 --> 00:13:00,072
Is this done?
Nope.

231
00:13:00,579 --> 00:13:03,377
Extreme Home Makeover puts
together a house in an hour.

232
00:13:03,449 --> 00:13:06,350
If you were on that crew,
you'd be fired like that.

233
00:13:06,719 --> 00:13:09,517
Somebody did something bad
to Michael's carpet.

234
00:13:10,823 --> 00:13:12,916
Maybe that's all
we need to know.

235
00:13:19,365 --> 00:13:22,459
Who do you think did it? Are you
kidding? I thought it was you.

236
00:13:22,535 --> 00:13:24,298
Really? I thought you.

237
00:13:32,478 --> 00:13:34,673
This was no act
of God. A person did this.

238
00:13:34,747 --> 00:13:38,114
A person who works in this
office. Maybe all of them.

239
00:13:39,718 --> 00:13:41,083
You know what?

240
00:13:41,253 --> 00:13:45,053
Today is not a good day
for a sales contest.

241
00:13:45,124 --> 00:13:47,024
We're not doing this today.

242
00:13:47,092 --> 00:13:49,890
That doesn't seem fair.
You want to talk about fair?

243
00:13:49,962 --> 00:13:52,487
Does anyone need
to smell my old carpet?

244
00:13:52,565 --> 00:13:56,001
You explain to me how that was fair and
I'll explain to you how this is fair.

245
00:13:56,068 --> 00:13:57,467
Plus, I just...

246
00:13:57,536 --> 00:13:59,731
I think that picking today
was sort of taking advantage.

247
00:13:59,805 --> 00:14:03,764
But you're the one who picked
today. I am a victim of a hate crime.

248
00:14:04,677 --> 00:14:06,167
Stanley knows what
I'm talking about.

249
00:14:06,245 --> 00:14:07,974
That's not what
a hate crime is.

250
00:14:08,047 --> 00:14:12,040
Well, I hated it a lot,
okay. I... You know what?

251
00:14:12,618 --> 00:14:16,418
If the guilty person would just come
forward and take their punishment,

252
00:14:16,488 --> 00:14:17,955
we'd be done.

253
00:14:22,628 --> 00:14:24,960
Very well, then
you're all punished.

254
00:14:25,030 --> 00:14:27,863
What's our punishment?
You're all on a time out.

255
00:14:28,634 --> 00:14:30,499
Just sit there quietly.

256
00:14:34,006 --> 00:14:36,497
No, no.

257
00:14:43,015 --> 00:14:44,778
Hey.
What's up?

258
00:14:44,850 --> 00:14:46,112
Nothing much.

259
00:14:46,585 --> 00:14:49,918
Let me ask you something.
It's actually a little awkward.

260
00:14:50,356 --> 00:14:53,189
What?
What do you think of Kelly?

261
00:14:54,526 --> 00:14:58,053
I don't know. It depends if
you like a little junk in...

262
00:14:59,531 --> 00:15:01,055
She's really cool.

263
00:15:01,133 --> 00:15:03,658
Are you interested in her?
Yeah, totally.

264
00:15:03,903 --> 00:15:05,666
Really?
Did she say something?

265
00:15:05,738 --> 00:15:07,467
She said lots of things.

266
00:15:07,673 --> 00:15:10,403
Do you know if she's looking
for a long-term thing

267
00:15:10,476 --> 00:15:13,343
or if she'd be cool
just hanging out?

268
00:15:14,413 --> 00:15:16,881
I have no idea.
Can you find out?

269
00:15:18,684 --> 00:15:20,914
Yeah. Sure.

270
00:15:23,122 --> 00:15:24,953
Oh, long-term, definitely.

271
00:15:25,024 --> 00:15:28,687
Fall in love, have babies,
spend every second together.

272
00:15:28,761 --> 00:15:31,958
But don't tell him that, okay? Just
tell him I'm, like, up for anything.

273
00:15:32,031 --> 00:15:34,158
I mean, I'm not a slut,
but who knows?

274
00:15:34,233 --> 00:15:37,225
Do you remember Ed Truck?
Sure. He hired me.

275
00:15:37,369 --> 00:15:39,860
How's he doing?
How would I know?

276
00:15:40,239 --> 00:15:42,002
I thought you might.

277
00:15:42,174 --> 00:15:44,369
My biggest fear is
turning into him.

278
00:15:44,443 --> 00:15:47,105
Michael, you should have
much bigger fears than that.

279
00:15:47,179 --> 00:15:49,477
I wasn't talking
literally, Creed.

280
00:15:49,548 --> 00:15:53,507
Yeah, being buried alive would be
worse. Happy? Why am I talking to you?

281
00:15:54,153 --> 00:15:57,782
Ed? Hi, thanks for meeting me.

282
00:15:58,090 --> 00:16:01,992
It must be kind of neat coming
back. Yeah. Shall we go upstairs?

283
00:16:02,261 --> 00:16:05,788
Well, honestly, Ed, I really don't
want to be up there right now.

284
00:16:06,231 --> 00:16:08,392
So, what's the problem
with my pension?

285
00:16:08,467 --> 00:16:11,868
Oh, no, no, no, you're good.
It was clerical. You're good.

286
00:16:12,705 --> 00:16:15,139
Well, somebody did
something in my office

287
00:16:15,207 --> 00:16:18,301
and I now think that they did it on
purpose and it was directed at me.

288
00:16:18,377 --> 00:16:19,639
Well, what was done?

289
00:16:19,712 --> 00:16:22,442
I didn't get
a good look at it,

290
00:16:22,514 --> 00:16:25,312
but it smells horrible.

291
00:16:25,617 --> 00:16:28,814
Yeah, somebody once
did that in my office.

292
00:16:29,221 --> 00:16:30,279
Really?
Yeah.

293
00:16:30,356 --> 00:16:33,325
Well, that figures.
So, how did you deal

294
00:16:33,392 --> 00:16:35,121
with people not liking you?

295
00:16:35,194 --> 00:16:37,856
You can't expect to be
friends with everybody.

296
00:16:37,930 --> 00:16:40,125
Well, sure I can.
No.

297
00:16:40,199 --> 00:16:43,999
They'll always think of you as
a boss first. Not necessarily.

298
00:16:44,069 --> 00:16:46,333
You can love a boss
like you do a father.

299
00:16:46,405 --> 00:16:48,965
I'm not sure that ever
happens. Well, okay.

300
00:16:49,041 --> 00:16:51,168
Different management styles.

301
00:16:51,243 --> 00:16:53,541
Why can't your workers
be your workers,

302
00:16:53,612 --> 00:16:56,513
family be your family,
your friends be your friends?

303
00:16:57,216 --> 00:17:00,674
Last week I would have given a
kidney to anyone in this office.

304
00:17:00,786 --> 00:17:04,119
I would've reached right into my
stomach and pulled it out for them.

305
00:17:04,189 --> 00:17:05,588
But now, no.

306
00:17:05,758 --> 00:17:09,091
I don't have the relationship with
these people that I thought I did.

307
00:17:09,161 --> 00:17:10,594
I hope they ask,

308
00:17:11,263 --> 00:17:13,231
so they can hear me say,

309
00:17:14,099 --> 00:17:17,364
"No. I only give my organs
to my real friends.

310
00:17:17,536 --> 00:17:19,663
"Go get yourself
a monkey kidney. "

311
00:17:20,606 --> 00:17:24,599
Hey, Brenda, this is
Jim Halpert, from the boat?

312
00:17:25,244 --> 00:17:28,077
And I got your number
from the corporate directory,

313
00:17:28,147 --> 00:17:31,207
and well, I was assuming that
you probably gave it to them

314
00:17:31,283 --> 00:17:34,013
because you wanted me
to ask you out, right?

315
00:17:35,387 --> 00:17:37,355
So, give me a call back.

316
00:17:37,756 --> 00:17:40,247
You can get my number
from said directory.

317
00:17:41,627 --> 00:17:45,188
Or just check your e-mail,
'cause I just sent you one.

318
00:17:46,498 --> 00:17:49,899
Yikes. Give me
a call back. I hope.

319
00:17:50,202 --> 00:17:52,329
I'll talk to you later. Bye.

320
00:17:55,507 --> 00:17:58,203
You just asked a girl out
on the phone.

321
00:17:59,878 --> 00:18:00,936
Yep.

322
00:18:03,849 --> 00:18:04,941
Yes.

323
00:18:05,017 --> 00:18:08,953
Hello, yes, I'm looking for a
gay nerd named Michael Scott.

324
00:18:09,021 --> 00:18:11,285
Who is this?
How did you get this number?

325
00:18:11,356 --> 00:18:13,551
Your mom, you gay nerd.

326
00:18:13,659 --> 00:18:18,323
Oh, my God. Packer. Packster.
Whacky Pack, how you doing?

327
00:18:18,397 --> 00:18:21,389
Hey, listen, did you get that
package I left for you?

328
00:18:22,634 --> 00:18:25,967
No. Did anybody see
a package here today?

329
00:18:26,672 --> 00:18:29,232
No. How big was it?
It was pretty big.

330
00:18:29,308 --> 00:18:30,639
Really?
Yeah!

331
00:18:30,709 --> 00:18:32,438
Did you see a big package?

332
00:18:32,544 --> 00:18:35,809
Where did you leave it? Look
in the middle of your office.

333
00:18:35,881 --> 00:18:39,248
Really? Guys, did you see
a big package in my office?

334
00:18:40,385 --> 00:18:41,977
You mean, the thing?

335
00:18:45,891 --> 00:18:47,620
Are you kidding me?

336
00:18:50,295 --> 00:18:52,263
Special delivery.
That was Packer!

337
00:18:52,331 --> 00:18:55,994
You are dead!
You are dead, my friend.

338
00:18:56,068 --> 00:18:58,434
That is... Oh, God!

339
00:18:58,971 --> 00:19:00,700
Of course it was you.

340
00:19:00,906 --> 00:19:02,965
Sit on the throne, Michael.

341
00:19:03,242 --> 00:19:05,210
Yeah! Yeah!

342
00:19:06,145 --> 00:19:08,340
Oh, my God! It was Packer!

343
00:19:08,480 --> 00:19:12,143
It takes an advanced sense of humor.
I don't expect everybody to understand.

344
00:19:12,217 --> 00:19:14,845
It was done out of love,
just like I thought.

345
00:19:14,920 --> 00:19:18,822
It's... God, these people are
so... These are good people.

346
00:19:19,758 --> 00:19:22,318
We have fun. We just have fun.

347
00:19:23,228 --> 00:19:26,026
Oh, I'm just so sorry
that I threw the thing out.

348
00:19:36,909 --> 00:19:39,275
You have
seven unheard messages.

349
00:19:40,412 --> 00:19:41,777
Hey, Jim, it's Pam.

350
00:19:41,847 --> 00:19:43,474
I keep looking up to
say something to you

351
00:19:43,549 --> 00:19:45,915
and then Michael's there
and it's horrible.

352
00:19:45,984 --> 00:19:48,452
Anyway, I'm bored. Come back.

353
00:19:48,854 --> 00:19:50,082
Hey, guess what?

354
00:19:50,155 --> 00:19:52,521
I moved my computer
so I can't see Michael's head.

355
00:19:52,591 --> 00:19:56,687
It's working. I think I can have a career
as a very specific type of decorator.

356
00:19:56,762 --> 00:19:59,856
Sudoku. Level, moderate.
Time, 18 minutes.

357
00:19:59,932 --> 00:20:01,593
Suck on that, Halpert.

358
00:20:02,568 --> 00:20:03,933
I'll transfer you.

359
00:20:04,369 --> 00:20:07,167
Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam.
Hold, please.

360
00:20:07,940 --> 00:20:09,965
Dunder Mifflin, this is...
Okay, sorry.

361
00:20:10,042 --> 00:20:12,033
Michael was standing at my
desk, and I needed to be busy

362
00:20:12,110 --> 00:20:14,476
or who knows what would have
happened. So, thank you.

363
00:20:14,546 --> 00:20:18,277
Hey, what's that word we made up for
when you have a thing stuck in your shoe?

364
00:20:18,350 --> 00:20:20,784
Anyway, I have a thing
stuck in my shoe.

365
00:20:21,186 --> 00:20:23,245
Hey, I have a chance
to sneak out of here early

366
00:20:23,322 --> 00:20:26,018
and I'm not messing this up.
So, I'll see you tomorrow.

367
00:20:26,091 --> 00:20:27,820
Calling from my cell phone.

368
00:20:27,893 --> 00:20:30,919
I don't know if you guys figured out
who did that to Michael's carpet yet,

369
00:20:30,996 --> 00:20:34,397
but I have a theory that involves
an inter-departmental conspiracy.

370
00:20:34,466 --> 00:20:37,026
Everybody in the office.
We need to talk.