1
00:00:11,643 --> 00:00:12,632
Hello, Dunder Mifflin.

2
00:00:12,711 --> 00:00:14,144
No, no, no. No.

3
00:00:17,483 --> 00:00:19,576
I believe that every man,
woman, and child in this country

4
00:00:19,651 --> 00:00:21,084
should learn how
to speak Spanish.

5
00:00:21,153 --> 00:00:25,419
They are our neighbors to the south,
and this would be a healing thing

6
00:00:26,158 --> 00:00:28,251
for all of North America.

7
00:00:29,595 --> 00:00:33,861
And I am going on vacation
next week to Cancún.

8
00:00:48,747 --> 00:00:51,272
I don't understand why Michael
is wasting his time with Spanish.

9
00:00:51,350 --> 00:00:53,784
I have it on very good
authority that within 20 years,

10
00:00:53,852 --> 00:00:56,286
everyone will be
speaking German.

11
00:00:56,688 --> 00:00:58,781
Or a Chinese-German hybrid.

12
00:01:04,263 --> 00:01:08,029
Michael's having a hard time
with the gender part of Spanish.

13
00:01:08,100 --> 00:01:09,658
So, I told him
to mark everything

14
00:01:09,735 --> 00:01:12,260
with the international
symbol for gender.

15
00:01:12,337 --> 00:01:13,497
And...

16
00:01:15,307 --> 00:01:17,241
I should have been
more specific.

17
00:01:17,376 --> 00:01:19,776
Your office is full
of genitalia.

18
00:01:23,749 --> 00:01:24,773
"That's what he says"?

19
00:01:24,850 --> 00:01:26,078
Damn it.

20
00:01:26,385 --> 00:01:27,818
Ah, Angelo!

21
00:01:27,886 --> 00:01:28,978
Angela.

22
00:01:30,956 --> 00:01:32,947
Michael.

23
00:01:58,083 --> 00:02:02,144
All right, so I'll finish up on bulk pricing
and then you go into delivery guarantees.

24
00:02:02,221 --> 00:02:05,713
You know, maybe there's an
opportunity for a joke there, like...

25
00:02:05,791 --> 00:02:08,259
Like, "I just
delivered a baby.

26
00:02:08,760 --> 00:02:11,251
"They didn't offer
me a guarantee."

27
00:02:11,830 --> 00:02:13,525
Yeah. Maybe we don't
even need that.

28
00:02:13,599 --> 00:02:16,693
Can you smell the power?
Halperts, power couple.

29
00:02:16,835 --> 00:02:18,632
You know what? I should be
getting this client, Michael.

30
00:02:18,704 --> 00:02:20,262
My numbers are better
than either of theirs.

31
00:02:20,339 --> 00:02:23,274
I went with the people I thought
would put the best face on the company.

32
00:02:23,342 --> 00:02:25,742
If you want people to put
the best face on something,

33
00:02:25,811 --> 00:02:26,835
why would you
get two people

34
00:02:26,912 --> 00:02:30,814
who probably have never cut the
face off of anything in their lives?

35
00:02:30,883 --> 00:02:31,872
It's a good point.

36
00:02:32,317 --> 00:02:34,251
This is our first
joint sales pitch.

37
00:02:34,319 --> 00:02:35,809
I think we're gonna work
really well together.

38
00:02:35,888 --> 00:02:38,755
Yeah. I think we have
complementary strengths.

39
00:02:38,824 --> 00:02:39,813
We understand
each other.

40
00:02:39,892 --> 00:02:41,723
We have good
give and take.

41
00:02:41,793 --> 00:02:43,420
I give, he takes!

42
00:02:45,063 --> 00:02:47,122
I don't even know
who you are anymore.

43
00:02:51,303 --> 00:02:54,466
Hi. Donna Newton.
Here to see Michael Scott.

44
00:02:55,474 --> 00:02:58,705
Hey, Miss Newton. Hi.
I'm Jim. How are you?

45
00:02:58,777 --> 00:03:01,177
Did somebody order
a hooker over here?

46
00:03:01,246 --> 00:03:02,270
Stop that. Hi.

47
00:03:02,347 --> 00:03:03,644
Hi. How are you?

48
00:03:03,782 --> 00:03:05,750
There's this woman
I met a few weeks ago.

49
00:03:05,817 --> 00:03:09,275
Her name is Donna. Manager
of a Sid and Dexter's.

50
00:03:09,621 --> 00:03:13,455
And right now, we're in the
midst of a passionate love affair.

51
00:03:15,661 --> 00:03:19,654
No, but she is coming by today,
maybe to buy some printers, so...

52
00:03:20,966 --> 00:03:23,833
Right here, we have the wonder
twins, Jim and Pam Halpert.

53
00:03:23,902 --> 00:03:25,529
They will be
assisting you today.

54
00:03:25,604 --> 00:03:27,595
You look exactly alike.

55
00:03:27,673 --> 00:03:29,106
No, we're
actually married.

56
00:03:29,174 --> 00:03:30,436
We're not
brother and sister.

57
00:03:30,509 --> 00:03:32,374
I have a sense about
these things. All right.

58
00:03:32,444 --> 00:03:36,676
You have some ancestors
in common somewhere back.

59
00:03:36,949 --> 00:03:39,543
I knew it. You should see their baby.

60
00:03:41,286 --> 00:03:45,450
So, yes, laser printers are more
expensive, but they cost less to operate,

61
00:03:45,524 --> 00:03:46,718
so it's a trade-off.

62
00:03:46,792 --> 00:03:48,521
Hi. Sorry to interrupt.

63
00:03:48,894 --> 00:03:51,454
Little time sensitive. Do
you, Donna, by any chance

64
00:03:51,530 --> 00:03:53,054
shop at Victoria's Secret?
What?

65
00:03:53,131 --> 00:03:56,294
Because I keep getting
these magazines sent to me

66
00:03:56,702 --> 00:04:00,866
via the address of the woman who
used to live in my condo before me.

67
00:04:00,939 --> 00:04:02,201
None of this
is time sensitive.

68
00:04:02,274 --> 00:04:04,708
Yes, the sale's on
now through May.

69
00:04:04,776 --> 00:04:05,868
Oh, yeah, thank you.

70
00:04:05,944 --> 00:04:07,343
Okay. I have more of them.

71
00:04:07,412 --> 00:04:11,314
You would have weekly conference
calls with executives in corporate,

72
00:04:11,383 --> 00:04:14,250
a two week training program at
the Yale School of Management.

73
00:04:14,319 --> 00:04:18,085
Obviously you would be high on the
list for advancement opportunities.

74
00:04:18,156 --> 00:04:19,214
Sounds all right.

75
00:04:19,291 --> 00:04:20,451
What is this?

76
00:04:20,525 --> 00:04:22,049
This is Print
In All Colors,

77
00:04:22,127 --> 00:04:24,994
Sabre's minority
executive training program.

78
00:04:25,063 --> 00:04:27,361
It doesn't just sound
"aite," it sounds amazing.

79
00:04:27,432 --> 00:04:28,763
I didn't say "aite."

80
00:04:28,834 --> 00:04:30,062
How do I apply?

81
00:04:30,135 --> 00:04:31,727
You have to be a minority.

82
00:04:32,104 --> 00:04:34,572
Glasses wearers,
cholera survivors,

83
00:04:34,640 --> 00:04:37,871
geniuses, non-organic family
farmers. The list goes on and on.

84
00:04:37,943 --> 00:04:39,376
You want me to keep going?
Those don't really count.

85
00:04:39,444 --> 00:04:42,470
We're thinking more ethnic
and racial minorities.

86
00:04:42,547 --> 00:04:44,742
Come here. Come here.

87
00:04:45,550 --> 00:04:48,314
Ten seconds ago this guy
was driving a forklift, okay?

88
00:04:48,387 --> 00:04:53,222
Now, all of a sudden, he's Cinderella of
the office? What are you guys thinking?

89
00:04:53,525 --> 00:04:55,516
I like the sound of this.

90
00:04:55,627 --> 00:04:58,562
Maybe one day I'll be
sitting in Michael's chair.

91
00:04:58,630 --> 00:05:00,359
Wouldn't that be something?

92
00:05:00,432 --> 00:05:03,333
One minority from this branch
is going to get into this program.

93
00:05:03,568 --> 00:05:05,559
Who would I prefer? Hmm.

94
00:05:06,171 --> 00:05:09,698
The competent hardworking one
who does things his own way,

95
00:05:10,042 --> 00:05:14,479
or the malleable simpleton who can
be bought for a few fashion magazines?

96
00:05:15,147 --> 00:05:18,014
This is the second time that
you've sent me the wrong size.

97
00:05:18,083 --> 00:05:19,482
I mean, I know what
a four should feel like.

98
00:05:19,551 --> 00:05:21,041
I've been a four
my whole life.

99
00:05:21,119 --> 00:05:24,418
You know what? You can go to hell,
all right? Thanks for nothing.

100
00:05:24,489 --> 00:05:27,583
Oh, man.
White people, right?

101
00:05:27,659 --> 00:05:28,717
I don't know
if she was white.

102
00:05:28,960 --> 00:05:31,087
Well, you can kind of
tell from their voice.

103
00:05:31,163 --> 00:05:32,255
Yeah.

104
00:05:32,331 --> 00:05:35,596
I bet you get pulled over by the
cops a lot just because of your race.

105
00:05:35,667 --> 00:05:38,500
Well, they say it's because of
texting, but maybe you're right.

106
00:05:38,570 --> 00:05:42,597
I think you should consider applying for
the executive minority training program.

107
00:05:42,674 --> 00:05:44,835
I never thought of myself
as an executive before.

108
00:05:44,910 --> 00:05:46,810
I know, 'cause you
have no role models.

109
00:05:46,878 --> 00:05:49,608
How many Indian CEOs
can you think of?

110
00:05:49,681 --> 00:05:51,808
I can't think of
any CEOs, any race.

111
00:05:51,883 --> 00:05:54,181
You could be
the Indian Bill Gates.

112
00:05:55,053 --> 00:05:57,578
You could be
the Indian Ted Turner.

113
00:05:59,291 --> 00:06:01,816
I could be
the Indian Julia Roberts.

114
00:06:02,294 --> 00:06:05,559
That's not... She's...
Okay. Yes.

115
00:06:06,498 --> 00:06:10,025
I took the liberty to scan a few things
earlier, and I want to show you...

116
00:06:10,102 --> 00:06:13,663
There we go! Look at those
vivid colors. Look at my eyes.

117
00:06:13,805 --> 00:06:15,670
Those are
Shrek-green eyes.

118
00:06:15,741 --> 00:06:20,303
That is me again. I think this
displays the crisp, dazzling white.

119
00:06:21,146 --> 00:06:22,841
And that would
be a display

120
00:06:22,914 --> 00:06:24,040
of the crisp,
gorgeous black.

121
00:06:24,116 --> 00:06:25,208
Yeah.

122
00:06:25,484 --> 00:06:28,544
It's subtle.
It's how it works.

123
00:06:29,020 --> 00:06:30,783
I show her an image
that turns her on,

124
00:06:30,856 --> 00:06:32,847
and then she looks at me,
then she looks at the image,

125
00:06:32,924 --> 00:06:34,289
then back at me,
then back at the image.

126
00:06:34,359 --> 00:06:37,328
Soon she doesn't know what
is me, what is the image,

127
00:06:37,396 --> 00:06:39,421
she just knows
that she's turned on.

128
00:06:40,165 --> 00:06:43,828
This is a place that I like to
go to be alone with my thoughts.

129
00:06:43,902 --> 00:06:46,530
I've never taken
anybody there before.

130
00:06:46,671 --> 00:06:48,696
Who took the photo?
Ryan.

131
00:06:48,774 --> 00:06:49,798
Oh.

132
00:06:50,375 --> 00:06:51,865
And that's it.

133
00:06:53,612 --> 00:06:56,172
That's me.
That's who I am.

134
00:06:56,848 --> 00:06:58,941
Not bad.

135
00:06:59,017 --> 00:07:00,484
Oh, thanks.

136
00:07:01,086 --> 00:07:02,519
You're not bad, either.

137
00:07:02,587 --> 00:07:03,747
Thank you.

138
00:07:10,896 --> 00:07:12,022
Oh, my God.

139
00:07:12,097 --> 00:07:14,395
Jim, could you come
in here for a sec?

140
00:07:15,667 --> 00:07:17,999
What was that printer
we were looking at?

141
00:07:20,038 --> 00:07:21,938
You didn't see it, Pam.

142
00:07:22,107 --> 00:07:24,632
She was giving me all sorts of signals
that she wanted me to make a move.

143
00:07:24,709 --> 00:07:25,767
Shortbread?
No.

144
00:07:25,844 --> 00:07:27,277
I'll have one.

145
00:07:27,345 --> 00:07:29,779
Well, maybe you shouldn't
try to kiss people at work.

146
00:07:29,848 --> 00:07:32,282
Oh, really, Jim?
What about Pam?

147
00:07:32,350 --> 00:07:34,341
And you did a heck
of a lot more than kiss.

148
00:07:34,419 --> 00:07:35,750
Maybe this could
be my Pam.

149
00:07:35,821 --> 00:07:37,311
Okay, well,
all that is irrelevant...

150
00:07:37,389 --> 00:07:39,414
Maybe Michael
has a point.

151
00:07:39,758 --> 00:07:43,785
I mean, if she was really that
upset, she wouldn't still be here.

152
00:07:44,229 --> 00:07:46,197
Was it professional? No.

153
00:07:47,566 --> 00:07:50,694
But I work in the nightlife
industry. I get hit on all the time.

154
00:07:50,769 --> 00:07:53,897
In my 20s,
it would've been annoying.

155
00:07:53,972 --> 00:07:56,031
In my late 20s,
I find it really flattering.

156
00:07:56,808 --> 00:07:58,776
Look, I know that
I screwed up in there.

157
00:07:58,844 --> 00:08:00,539
I know that I probably
messed up your sale.

158
00:08:00,612 --> 00:08:02,079
I just want to go
in and fix it.

159
00:08:02,147 --> 00:08:04,672
What if I back out and you
finish the pitch with Jim?

160
00:08:04,749 --> 00:08:05,841
What?

161
00:08:06,551 --> 00:08:08,178
What was that?
Just let him flirt with her.

162
00:08:08,253 --> 00:08:10,187
People meet each
other all sorts of ways.

163
00:08:10,255 --> 00:08:13,190
Pam, you know he's not gonna get
anywhere and he's gonna blow our sale.

164
00:08:13,258 --> 00:08:14,657
Who cares?
It's not that huge a sale.

165
00:08:14,726 --> 00:08:17,820
Hey, the Schwab guy told us to treat
every sale like it was a huge sale.

166
00:08:17,896 --> 00:08:21,263
Don't act like you understood
anything that guy said.

167
00:08:22,834 --> 00:08:24,563
Good luck, wingman.

168
00:08:27,272 --> 00:08:29,832
How has being
a minority affected you?

169
00:08:29,908 --> 00:08:31,466
Well, there's a lot of
pressure from my parents

170
00:08:31,543 --> 00:08:33,875
to settle down
and marry an Indian guy.

171
00:08:33,945 --> 00:08:36,277
Oh, good. And you
resent this because...

172
00:08:36,348 --> 00:08:39,977
Indian guys always wear their cell
phones outside their pants. It's so dorky.

173
00:08:40,051 --> 00:08:44,715
No, no, no. That's not dorky. Look,
it's easily accessible. Boom. Like this.

174
00:08:45,090 --> 00:08:47,581
911, hello. Scranton
Strangler's in the house.

175
00:08:47,659 --> 00:08:49,286
Inside the house!

176
00:08:50,195 --> 00:08:52,060
Just put it
in your pocket.

177
00:08:53,665 --> 00:08:56,862
Look at that. She's
totally flirting with him.

178
00:08:57,035 --> 00:09:00,835
You don't know that. Some people
can't help oozing sexuality.

179
00:09:01,506 --> 00:09:03,906
You ever notice you can
only ooze two things?

180
00:09:03,975 --> 00:09:06,944
Sexuality and pus.
Man, I tell you.

181
00:09:07,479 --> 00:09:09,811
She just crossed her
arms together. That's bad.

182
00:09:09,881 --> 00:09:14,215
Maybe she's just pushing her breasts
together to make them look bigger.

183
00:09:18,823 --> 00:09:19,949
Like that?

184
00:09:20,025 --> 00:09:22,459
Is this the best
you can do right now?

185
00:09:22,527 --> 00:09:23,926
For that printer, yes.

186
00:09:24,129 --> 00:09:26,563
Unfortunately we don't
have a lot of flexibility.

187
00:09:26,631 --> 00:09:30,397
Oh. Well, I guess I'm just used
to the restaurant business where,

188
00:09:30,468 --> 00:09:33,198
if you're in charge then
you can always get discounts

189
00:09:33,271 --> 00:09:34,465
for the people
that you like.

190
00:09:34,539 --> 00:09:35,801
Yeah.

191
00:09:36,341 --> 00:09:38,935
Maybe we can find
a little wiggle room, right?

192
00:09:39,010 --> 00:09:40,034
What's that?

193
00:09:40,111 --> 00:09:41,703
Maybe we can find some
wiggle room.

194
00:09:41,780 --> 00:09:42,940
I don't...
I don't think so.

195
00:09:43,014 --> 00:09:44,879
I think we could.

196
00:09:46,818 --> 00:09:50,447
I don't see how we could possibly sell
these for that little without losing money.

197
00:09:50,522 --> 00:09:52,012
Delivery alone will cost...

198
00:09:52,090 --> 00:09:53,318
Okay, well, sometimes,

199
00:09:53,391 --> 00:09:58,590
sometimes it makes financial sense to
lose money, right? Like, for tax purposes.

200
00:09:58,830 --> 00:10:01,924
Actually, I ran the numbers
on this, and in this case,

201
00:10:02,000 --> 00:10:03,763
it makes more financial
sense to gain money.

202
00:10:03,835 --> 00:10:04,859
Why don't you
run them again?

203
00:10:04,936 --> 00:10:07,234
What if she's just flirting
with you to get a better price?

204
00:10:07,305 --> 00:10:08,465
If she is,
it's working.

205
00:10:08,540 --> 00:10:12,476
Yeah, Michael, here's a trick.
Ask her if she wants a mint.

206
00:10:12,944 --> 00:10:16,812
If she says no, then
she is not interested.

207
00:10:16,881 --> 00:10:18,712
She does not like him.

208
00:10:18,783 --> 00:10:23,482
You can flirt with someone to get what
you want and also be attracted to them.

209
00:10:23,555 --> 00:10:24,920
How do you think
we got together?

210
00:10:24,990 --> 00:10:26,753
'Cause I stopped by your
desk, like, 15 times a day.

211
00:10:26,825 --> 00:10:28,656
I was after your money.

212
00:10:28,727 --> 00:10:29,921
Well, the joke was on you.

213
00:10:29,995 --> 00:10:31,360
Yes, it was.

214
00:10:32,330 --> 00:10:33,763
Can you stop
micromanaging?

215
00:10:33,832 --> 00:10:35,663
I know how to do this.
You're yelling... Okay. Okay.

216
00:10:35,734 --> 00:10:36,723
What are you guys doing?

217
00:10:36,801 --> 00:10:38,530
This girl was really rude
to me at the mall,

218
00:10:38,603 --> 00:10:41,504
so I created a fake IM account
from a hot guy at her high school,

219
00:10:41,573 --> 00:10:43,006
and now I'm trying
to make her anorexic.

220
00:10:43,074 --> 00:10:45,304
Tell her everyone in
homeroom thinks she's fat.

221
00:10:45,377 --> 00:10:46,401
That is so good.

222
00:10:46,478 --> 00:10:48,571
You know, we really should keep
practicing for this interview.

223
00:10:48,647 --> 00:10:50,114
Oh, that's okay.
Ryan coached me.

224
00:10:50,181 --> 00:10:52,046
Ryan? What does he know?

225
00:10:52,117 --> 00:10:54,176
It's easy. You just turn
every question around on them.

226
00:10:54,252 --> 00:10:56,049
Do you think you're treated
differently because of your race?

227
00:10:56,121 --> 00:10:58,783
Would you ask that same
question if I was white?

228
00:10:58,857 --> 00:11:00,552
We're so in.
We?

229
00:11:01,026 --> 00:11:03,392
When I become executive,
I'm gonna make Ryan manager.

230
00:11:03,461 --> 00:11:06,294
And then the two of us
are cleaning house.

231
00:11:06,931 --> 00:11:08,922
Kelly will be
even worse than Darryl.

232
00:11:09,234 --> 00:11:10,394
If you'd have told
me this morning

233
00:11:10,468 --> 00:11:14,199
that today I'd be creating a monster
capable of my own destruction,

234
00:11:14,272 --> 00:11:18,174
I'd have thought you were referring to the
bull Mose and I are trying to reanimate.

235
00:11:18,443 --> 00:11:23,244
"So, corporate approval of this contract
is contingent upon buyer and seller

236
00:11:23,314 --> 00:11:26,147
"obtaining..."
Blah-de-blah-de-blah.

237
00:11:26,217 --> 00:11:29,482
"Boilerplate, pound
of fish." Just kidding.

238
00:11:30,488 --> 00:11:32,456
Do you like mints?
Yes.

239
00:11:32,524 --> 00:11:34,355
I carry mints
with me sometimes.

240
00:11:34,426 --> 00:11:35,620
Oh, I haven't
tried those.

241
00:11:35,694 --> 00:11:36,718
Ever tried those?
No.

242
00:11:36,795 --> 00:11:37,819
They're good.

243
00:11:37,896 --> 00:11:38,920
You want one?

244
00:11:40,198 --> 00:11:42,029
Sure.
It's like...

245
00:11:43,468 --> 00:11:47,199
"Cool... Certified cool." I
like how they say "certified."

246
00:11:48,206 --> 00:11:51,039
Like there's some
consortium of...

247
00:11:53,478 --> 00:11:54,536
Michael!

248
00:11:54,612 --> 00:11:55,772
I'm sorry.

249
00:11:56,948 --> 00:11:58,381
I can't stop myself
from kissing her.

250
00:11:58,450 --> 00:12:02,511
Yeah. Now you know how I feel
sitting next to those M&M's all day.

251
00:12:02,887 --> 00:12:04,320
Well, why don't you
just move the M&M's?

252
00:12:04,389 --> 00:12:05,822
Why don't you shut up?

253
00:12:05,890 --> 00:12:10,020
Okay. Guys, guys, guys, just tell me it's
not totally insane to try one more time.

254
00:12:10,095 --> 00:12:11,119
It is totally insane.

255
00:12:11,196 --> 00:12:13,721
Michael, he's right. You
are turning into a stalker.

256
00:12:13,798 --> 00:12:15,629
Okay.
What do you think?

257
00:12:16,034 --> 00:12:17,365
I think it's over, man.

258
00:12:17,702 --> 00:12:18,794
Andy?

259
00:12:21,206 --> 00:12:22,264
Okay, some for,
some against.

260
00:12:22,340 --> 00:12:23,364
Nobody's for.

261
00:12:23,441 --> 00:12:24,499
Pam.
Hmm?

262
00:12:24,576 --> 00:12:25,668
What do you think?

263
00:12:27,479 --> 00:12:28,673
I think it's really,
really unlikely.

264
00:12:28,747 --> 00:12:29,771
Okay.

265
00:12:29,848 --> 00:12:31,440
Really unlikely.

266
00:12:32,183 --> 00:12:33,741
But I can't say
that it's impossible.

267
00:12:33,818 --> 00:12:35,012
What?

268
00:12:35,186 --> 00:12:37,177
I'm not saying
she's in love with him,

269
00:12:37,255 --> 00:12:39,587
but she could have
left a while ago.

270
00:12:39,657 --> 00:12:43,058
Most printer sales are done
over the phone, Miss Boob Shirt.

271
00:12:43,194 --> 00:12:44,821
I'm going
with Pam's group.

272
00:12:44,896 --> 00:12:46,830
Wait. Michael.

273
00:12:47,999 --> 00:12:49,364
Okay.
Michael. Michael.

274
00:12:49,434 --> 00:12:53,393
No. Guys, guys, guys, guys,
just thank you for talking.

275
00:12:54,639 --> 00:12:56,300
Wish me luck.
- No.

276
00:12:56,641 --> 00:12:59,474
What sort of movie would Rudy
have been if he had just stopped

277
00:12:59,544 --> 00:13:01,978
and given up
after two rejections?

278
00:13:04,082 --> 00:13:07,279
Would have been a lot shorter,
probably been a lot funnier,

279
00:13:07,352 --> 00:13:10,617
but it would have ultimately
been a disappointment.

280
00:13:10,822 --> 00:13:16,522
I still would have seen it,
but that's not the point.

281
00:13:19,531 --> 00:13:21,795
Kelly is disqualified.
What?

282
00:13:22,000 --> 00:13:23,991
You said the program
is not open to Caucasians.

283
00:13:24,068 --> 00:13:27,902
Well, anthropologically,
she is Indian.

284
00:13:27,972 --> 00:13:31,100
Indians migrated from the
Caucasus region of Europe.

285
00:13:31,176 --> 00:13:34,509
Therefore, technically, she is
Caucasian. You're welcome, America.

286
00:13:34,579 --> 00:13:36,069
Yeah, but she's
not white, though.

287
00:13:36,147 --> 00:13:38,547
Well, obviously
she's brownish,

288
00:13:38,616 --> 00:13:41,585
but come on. I mean,
Darryl is far more ethnic.

289
00:13:41,653 --> 00:13:43,450
Darryl withdrew
his application.

290
00:13:43,521 --> 00:13:48,356
The dates of the Yale program interfered
with his softball league, so he's gone.

291
00:13:49,093 --> 00:13:51,687
I got my whole life
to be a minority executive.

292
00:13:51,763 --> 00:13:54,425
I only have about a year
left in these knees, though.

293
00:13:54,599 --> 00:13:56,499
So Kelly is
the only applicant.

294
00:13:56,568 --> 00:13:58,559
Yeah, unless somebody
else applies today.

295
00:14:01,940 --> 00:14:04,568
Oh, dear God. Okay.

296
00:14:06,077 --> 00:14:09,808
Don't make any decisions just
yet. Okay? I'll be right back.

297
00:14:11,382 --> 00:14:12,542
Hello.

298
00:14:12,617 --> 00:14:15,108
That's very nice. I
never noticed that before.

299
00:14:15,186 --> 00:14:16,813
Sometimes my bangs cover it.

300
00:14:16,888 --> 00:14:21,154
Yeah. I don't want to be offensive,
but may I ask you what that means?

301
00:14:21,259 --> 00:14:23,750
I do find that offensive,
actually.

302
00:14:24,662 --> 00:14:27,722
We should have your
contract done by Thursday.

303
00:14:28,166 --> 00:14:31,158
Oh, great! Great. I will
look out for that stuff, then.

304
00:14:31,236 --> 00:14:32,726
Okay.
And...

305
00:14:33,671 --> 00:14:37,698
You know, I just wanted to say it was really,
really nice to do business with you.

306
00:14:37,775 --> 00:14:40,642
Yeah. It was nice to do
business with you, too.

307
00:14:40,712 --> 00:14:42,043
Thank you.

308
00:14:43,348 --> 00:14:44,906
Did I get everything?

309
00:14:44,983 --> 00:14:46,041
I don't know.

310
00:14:46,117 --> 00:14:47,209
I think so.

311
00:14:47,285 --> 00:14:48,343
Yeah, I think so.

312
00:14:49,087 --> 00:14:50,179
Okay.

313
00:14:52,824 --> 00:14:54,883
So... Oh! Donna?
- Yeah.

314
00:14:54,959 --> 00:14:57,621
Do you need validation?
We don't validate.

315
00:14:57,695 --> 00:14:58,855
No. It's just
in the lot, so...

316
00:14:58,930 --> 00:15:00,056
Thank you so much.

317
00:15:00,131 --> 00:15:03,862
You're welcome.
You're welcome.

318
00:15:04,335 --> 00:15:05,495
Mmm.

319
00:15:06,838 --> 00:15:07,896
Bye.

320
00:15:09,941 --> 00:15:12,933
So, if you have...

321
00:15:13,011 --> 00:15:14,911
If there's any other
questions that you have...

322
00:15:14,979 --> 00:15:18,642
I don't have any
other questions.

323
00:15:19,117 --> 00:15:22,917
I'm just gonna make
my way down to...

324
00:15:22,987 --> 00:15:24,511
Okay.
All right. Bye.

325
00:15:24,589 --> 00:15:25,715
Bye-bye.

326
00:15:25,790 --> 00:15:27,087
Have a good elevator ride.

327
00:15:27,158 --> 00:15:28,182
Okay.

328
00:15:30,528 --> 00:15:32,428
What's that out there?

329
00:15:37,068 --> 00:15:38,968
Michael,
how did it go?

330
00:15:42,273 --> 00:15:45,800
How would one of you feel if I told
you I could put you on a fast track

331
00:15:45,877 --> 00:15:48,141
to an executive position
at this company?

332
00:15:48,212 --> 00:15:50,237
Holy cow.
I'd be so happy.

333
00:15:50,515 --> 00:15:51,880
I wasn't talking to you,
pale face.

334
00:15:51,950 --> 00:15:53,781
I know. I meant
I'd be happy for them.

335
00:15:53,851 --> 00:15:58,049
What I'm offering is a ticket on a bullet
train straight to middle management.

336
00:15:58,122 --> 00:16:00,352
Dwight, I know
these programs.

337
00:16:00,425 --> 00:16:04,521
Every color is important, because
together we make a rainbow.

338
00:16:04,662 --> 00:16:05,686
Yes.

339
00:16:05,763 --> 00:16:07,060
I'll slap you in the
face with a rainbow.

340
00:16:07,131 --> 00:16:08,496
Mmm.

341
00:16:09,167 --> 00:16:13,433
Speaking of rainbows, Oscar, you
are kind of a double minority.

342
00:16:14,305 --> 00:16:15,363
Gay.

343
00:16:15,440 --> 00:16:18,170
So, we at Sabre could really
benefit from your perspective.

344
00:16:18,242 --> 00:16:20,472
Dwight, we know
Kelly applied.

345
00:16:22,280 --> 00:16:25,215
We're not going to cross her, no
matter how good the program is.

346
00:16:25,283 --> 00:16:26,648
I can protect
you from Kelly.

347
00:16:27,785 --> 00:16:29,446
Will you get out
of here? Seriously.

348
00:16:29,754 --> 00:16:33,451
For hobbies, yoga,
belly dancing,

349
00:16:33,758 --> 00:16:36,318
snake-charming, beds of
nails, I like lying...

350
00:16:36,394 --> 00:16:40,888
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
This is Hidetosha Hacigawa.

351
00:16:40,965 --> 00:16:43,695
He would like to apply for the Sabre
Minority Executive Training Program,

352
00:16:43,768 --> 00:16:44,996
Print In All
Colors initiative.

353
00:16:45,069 --> 00:16:46,400
Dwight, what
are you doing?

354
00:16:46,471 --> 00:16:50,066
Helping heal America in a dramatic
fashion in the eleventh hour.

355
00:16:50,141 --> 00:16:52,075
God, I hate you so much.

356
00:16:52,143 --> 00:16:53,906
Caucasians.
Am I right?

357
00:16:55,279 --> 00:16:56,473
Have a seat.
I'll translate.

358
00:16:56,547 --> 00:16:58,071
Why? I don't
need translator...

359
00:16:58,149 --> 00:17:00,743
You don't know
what you need, just...

360
00:17:00,818 --> 00:17:03,446
Why don't you tell me
a little about yourself, Hide.

361
00:17:25,476 --> 00:17:26,841
Hey, Michael,
how you doing?

362
00:17:26,911 --> 00:17:29,106
I don't know.
I don't know.

363
00:17:29,547 --> 00:17:31,105
Can't really trust
my feelings anymore.

364
00:17:31,182 --> 00:17:34,845
You know what, Michael? For what
it's worth, I was wrong, too.

365
00:17:34,919 --> 00:17:36,477
I thought she was
interested in you.

366
00:17:36,554 --> 00:17:39,717
She suckered you, too?
Was it the cleavage?

367
00:17:39,791 --> 00:17:41,622
Yeah, and the shoulder cutouts. Yep.

368
00:17:41,692 --> 00:17:44,286
Michael, you know,
it's easy to get fooled.

369
00:17:44,362 --> 00:17:48,628
Bob's warehouse guys flirt with me
all the time. It's mostly harmless.

370
00:17:49,100 --> 00:17:50,829
Usually I don't
let it go too far.

371
00:17:50,902 --> 00:17:54,030
You know, when I tore
my scrote, I was...

372
00:17:55,073 --> 00:17:59,203
I was seeing this really hot urologist
about it and thought she was into me,

373
00:17:59,277 --> 00:18:03,543
but now I think she was just doing
a bunch of stuff to bill my HMO.

374
00:18:03,614 --> 00:18:06,048
You know, she's touching
around down there.

375
00:18:06,117 --> 00:18:07,778
It's easy to
get confused.

376
00:18:07,852 --> 00:18:09,342
Michael, I think
Donna left this here.

377
00:18:09,420 --> 00:18:12,514
Should I put it in the lost and found
for 14 days and then I can take it home?

378
00:18:12,590 --> 00:18:13,648
God.

379
00:18:15,026 --> 00:18:17,017
She left this here? Okay.

380
00:18:18,596 --> 00:18:21,326
Maybe she wants me to return
this to her at her work.

381
00:18:21,399 --> 00:18:22,593
What? No.
No.

382
00:18:22,667 --> 00:18:23,656
No.

383
00:18:23,734 --> 00:18:25,133
Yeah. This could
be a signal.

384
00:18:25,470 --> 00:18:27,335
People don't just
take barrettes off.

385
00:18:27,405 --> 00:18:29,669
It's not a signal.
It's just a coincidence.

386
00:18:29,740 --> 00:18:30,934
No, it's not even
a coincidence.

387
00:18:31,008 --> 00:18:32,236
It's just something
that happened.

388
00:18:32,310 --> 00:18:33,470
Michael.
Well...

389
00:18:33,544 --> 00:18:37,981
She doesn't want you to return the
barrette. She's not interested in you.

390
00:18:39,183 --> 00:18:41,174
I know. I know. I know.
I'm sorry.

391
00:18:41,252 --> 00:18:44,710
I know. You're right. Thank
you. Thanks, everybody.

392
00:18:46,991 --> 00:18:48,015
No.

393
00:18:48,726 --> 00:18:49,954
Michael!

394
00:18:58,903 --> 00:19:00,131
Michael!

395
00:19:01,305 --> 00:19:04,502
Oh, you're still here.
I have your baguette.

396
00:19:06,377 --> 00:19:09,005
Everyone, it is my
pleasure to announce

397
00:19:09,080 --> 00:19:12,311
our newest member of the Sabre
Minority Executive Training Program,

398
00:19:12,383 --> 00:19:14,408
Kelly Rajanigandha Kapoor.

399
00:19:17,655 --> 00:19:19,782
They're going to be pretty
pleased in Tallahassee

400
00:19:19,857 --> 00:19:22,291
that I snagged
an Indian for the program.

401
00:19:22,360 --> 00:19:24,521
She'll be the first.
The program's mostly black.

402
00:19:24,595 --> 00:19:26,460
It's almost too black.

403
00:19:27,732 --> 00:19:29,700
That didn't sound right.

404
00:19:30,234 --> 00:19:32,828
And the best part is, is
that I get a business stipend

405
00:19:32,904 --> 00:19:34,804
to buy all new clothes.
- Awesome.

406
00:19:34,872 --> 00:19:36,464
So you can totally buy
any of my old clothes

407
00:19:36,541 --> 00:19:37,599
that I'm not gonna
need anymore.

408
00:19:37,675 --> 00:19:38,767
Oh, my God,
thank you so much.

409
00:19:38,843 --> 00:19:41,835
I love that denim jumpsuit
you have. How much?

410
00:19:42,280 --> 00:19:45,772
Actually, I was thinking about clothes that I
was just going to give to Goodwill anyway.

411
00:19:45,850 --> 00:19:47,579
Great.
Hey, kiddo.

412
00:19:48,853 --> 00:19:51,845
Congratulations are in order.
You deserve it.

413
00:19:55,593 --> 00:19:57,254
Thank you, Dwight.
Oh.

414
00:19:57,695 --> 00:19:59,595
I'll never forget everything
that you've done for me.

415
00:19:59,664 --> 00:20:01,393
Gosh.

416
00:20:01,465 --> 00:20:02,898
Because I never
forget anything.

417
00:20:05,603 --> 00:20:09,835
Just once I would like to be a puppet
master and have nothing go wrong.

418
00:20:09,907 --> 00:20:11,602
Is that too much to ask?

419
00:20:11,809 --> 00:20:16,212
You know what? Everybody told me that
you weren't interested. Everybody.

420
00:20:16,280 --> 00:20:18,305
And I didn't believe them.

421
00:20:19,317 --> 00:20:21,080
And they were right.

422
00:20:22,386 --> 00:20:24,946
So, here's your barrette.

423
00:20:26,457 --> 00:20:28,891
No, you were right.

424
00:20:29,927 --> 00:20:31,861
Who?
You were right.

425
00:20:32,530 --> 00:20:34,122
About what?

426
00:20:34,198 --> 00:20:35,460
You were right.

427
00:20:42,173 --> 00:20:44,198
I'm sorry.
No. No. No.

428
00:20:44,275 --> 00:20:45,742
I'm...
Nope.

429
00:20:52,550 --> 00:20:53,574
What happened?

430
00:20:53,651 --> 00:20:55,448
Kelly got into the
minority training program.

431
00:20:55,519 --> 00:20:59,819
Really? Oh, that's great.
That's such good news. I did it.

432
00:21:01,292 --> 00:21:02,657
I kissed. We kissed.

433
00:21:02,727 --> 00:21:03,785
Oh, Michael...

434
00:21:03,861 --> 00:21:06,227
No, I'm serious.
The... This happened.

435
00:21:07,031 --> 00:21:11,195
I went down to the parking lot and
I was... I returned her barrette.

436
00:21:15,339 --> 00:21:16,431
We...

437
00:21:17,341 --> 00:21:19,536
We did. Okay.
We did. We did.

438
00:21:20,311 --> 00:21:21,835
You know what?
It doesn't matter,

439
00:21:21,912 --> 00:21:25,541
because I know what happened,
and that is all that counts.

440
00:21:27,351 --> 00:21:28,750
I did do it!