1 00:00:02,001 --> 00:00:06,062 There is nothing wrong, nor will there ever be wrong, 2 00:00:06,138 --> 00:00:08,072 with any Sabre printers. 3 00:00:08,140 --> 00:00:09,164 Case closed. 4 00:00:11,710 --> 00:00:13,803 Michael Scott, as seen on TV. 5 00:00:13,879 --> 00:00:17,838 I saw you on the news and I want to pinch your tiny wiener. 6 00:00:17,916 --> 00:00:19,440 Oh, my God. 7 00:00:19,518 --> 00:00:20,678 It's Packer. 8 00:00:20,786 --> 00:00:24,153 Oh! Pac-Man, I thought you were a girl. 9 00:00:24,223 --> 00:00:26,919 Apparently, there are allegations 10 00:00:26,992 --> 00:00:29,426 that Sabre printers can cause a fire. 11 00:00:29,995 --> 00:00:33,123 So, they asked me to give a statement to the press. 12 00:00:33,198 --> 00:00:35,928 I'm like, "What? All right." 13 00:00:36,268 --> 00:00:37,667 So, I do it. 14 00:00:37,736 --> 00:00:41,638 It's on TV last night, and it's in the paper today, 15 00:00:41,707 --> 00:00:43,231 and it's online. 16 00:00:43,308 --> 00:00:47,335 And then I call Froggy 98.7, their request line. 17 00:00:47,413 --> 00:00:49,244 I talked to the host about it on the air. 18 00:00:49,314 --> 00:00:52,010 It's like, "Come on, people, enough." 19 00:00:52,518 --> 00:00:54,611 Everybody, we are at DEFCON 5. 20 00:00:54,686 --> 00:00:57,849 I am officially the second most watched clip of the day 21 00:00:57,923 --> 00:00:59,788 on the WBRE news site. 22 00:00:59,858 --> 00:01:00,847 What's number one? 23 00:01:00,926 --> 00:01:03,895 Oh? That teacher who was wrongfully accused of being a pedophile. 24 00:01:03,962 --> 00:01:07,125 Now, we cannot let the pedophile win again. 25 00:01:07,499 --> 00:01:10,991 I would like you all to go to the Web site and watch my clip 11 times. 26 00:01:11,070 --> 00:01:12,594 So, instead of working, you want... Yes. 27 00:01:12,671 --> 00:01:14,036 Okay. Yes. 28 00:01:14,106 --> 00:01:15,334 Come on. 29 00:01:16,475 --> 00:01:20,571 Get it up. That's what... Let's do it. 30 00:01:21,547 --> 00:01:23,606 Oh! Did you see this report 31 00:01:23,682 --> 00:01:25,479 that the zoo got a baby otter? 32 00:01:25,651 --> 00:01:26,777 It's on the same site. 33 00:01:26,852 --> 00:01:29,082 Aw! It's kissing its mommy. 34 00:01:29,154 --> 00:01:30,382 Please. Michael, you have to see this. 35 00:01:30,456 --> 00:01:32,048 This is, like, the cutest thing ever. 36 00:01:33,792 --> 00:01:39,025 Really? A baby otter? Okay, count me in as "Who cares?" 37 00:01:39,298 --> 00:01:42,290 It's not even that interesting, the baby otter. 38 00:01:42,601 --> 00:01:44,728 It can't even stand up. 39 00:01:44,803 --> 00:01:46,430 It's trying to stand up. 40 00:01:49,341 --> 00:01:50,831 There he goes. 41 00:02:17,436 --> 00:02:18,835 Howdy. 42 00:02:19,872 --> 00:02:21,806 I hope I'm not interrupting anything. 43 00:02:21,874 --> 00:02:23,933 Jo, we were not expecting you. 44 00:02:24,009 --> 00:02:25,704 But you all no doubt know why I'm here. 45 00:02:25,777 --> 00:02:28,473 No. Turns out our printers are famous. 46 00:02:29,348 --> 00:02:31,248 They're all over the news. 47 00:02:31,517 --> 00:02:32,779 It's an interesting story. 48 00:02:33,719 --> 00:02:36,187 Cheap, foreign printers 49 00:02:36,688 --> 00:02:38,383 attacking innocent Americans. 50 00:02:38,790 --> 00:02:42,021 Well, actually the real story isn't quite as racy. 51 00:02:42,761 --> 00:02:43,819 But 52 00:02:46,665 --> 00:02:47,825 let's give it a go. 53 00:02:48,066 --> 00:02:50,261 Jo, I think that I know what happened. 54 00:02:50,836 --> 00:02:52,736 I'm not sure you do, teddy bear. 55 00:02:53,071 --> 00:02:55,130 Well, now I think I might not. 56 00:02:55,908 --> 00:02:59,002 Not long ago, we discovered a defect in one of our printers. 57 00:02:59,077 --> 00:03:01,511 So, we got a software patch, fixed it right up. 58 00:03:01,580 --> 00:03:02,842 Just like that. 59 00:03:02,915 --> 00:03:04,314 I don't know how it works. 60 00:03:05,284 --> 00:03:07,582 Just as we were about to 61 00:03:07,653 --> 00:03:10,144 send out a letter to our affected customers, 62 00:03:10,322 --> 00:03:13,723 giving them free toner, and we keep them happy. 63 00:03:14,126 --> 00:03:16,560 But somebody here, they liked that first story better. 64 00:03:16,828 --> 00:03:18,887 The one where we lose half our clients 65 00:03:19,097 --> 00:03:21,122 For no damn good reason! 66 00:03:22,935 --> 00:03:26,803 Whoever it was who talked to the press, just come forward, please. 67 00:03:26,972 --> 00:03:27,961 Jo, 68 00:03:28,207 --> 00:03:29,765 I can assure you it was no one in this office. 69 00:03:30,142 --> 00:03:31,837 Can you, now? Absolutely. 70 00:03:31,977 --> 00:03:34,104 Anyone who talked to the press, please raise your hand. 71 00:03:36,748 --> 00:03:38,045 Put your hand up, Norma Rae. 72 00:03:38,517 --> 00:03:41,281 If you say anything, so help me God, 73 00:03:41,353 --> 00:03:42,945 I'll break off the temples of your glasses 74 00:03:43,021 --> 00:03:44,545 and stick them in your eye sockets. 75 00:03:44,623 --> 00:03:45,988 So unfair. 76 00:03:46,191 --> 00:03:49,490 Even if I thought that our printers killed baby seals, 77 00:03:49,561 --> 00:03:51,893 I would not be a whistleblower. 78 00:03:51,964 --> 00:03:55,559 The Bernards, for generations, have silenced whistleblowers. 79 00:03:55,634 --> 00:03:57,625 It's how we made all our money. 80 00:03:57,703 --> 00:03:59,500 Woody Guthrie wrote a song about us. 81 00:04:00,472 --> 00:04:02,303 Old Mister Bernard 82 00:04:02,374 --> 00:04:04,103 Old Mister Bernard 83 00:04:04,443 --> 00:04:07,344 Who have you silenced today? 84 00:04:07,412 --> 00:04:10,438 It's a little form. Says, "I did not do it." 85 00:04:10,782 --> 00:04:12,716 There is no reason for anyone here to sign this 86 00:04:12,784 --> 00:04:15,218 because I know everything there is to know about these people. 87 00:04:15,587 --> 00:04:17,111 I know when their birthdays are, 88 00:04:17,189 --> 00:04:18,656 I know what their favorite kind of cake is, 89 00:04:18,724 --> 00:04:20,214 I know what color streamers they like. 90 00:04:21,126 --> 00:04:22,718 All that's just birthday information, Michael. 91 00:04:22,794 --> 00:04:25,319 Yes, yes, but it shows a bigger picture. 92 00:04:25,397 --> 00:04:26,796 Why don't you come with me? 93 00:04:26,965 --> 00:04:29,195 We'll start out with the honcho, what d'you say? 94 00:04:29,268 --> 00:04:30,360 Okay. 95 00:04:30,702 --> 00:04:32,795 When Mama was working as a prison guard, 96 00:04:32,871 --> 00:04:35,931 and something went missing, she'd ask one question, 97 00:04:36,675 --> 00:04:39,075 "What do we do when we find the guilty party?" 98 00:04:39,411 --> 00:04:41,208 And if they said, "Come down on them 99 00:04:41,280 --> 00:04:44,340 "with that swift hammer of justice," innocent. 100 00:04:45,083 --> 00:04:47,517 A clear conscience don't need no mercy. 101 00:04:48,153 --> 00:04:52,351 But if they said, "Officer Bessie, well, they may have had a reason." 102 00:04:52,424 --> 00:04:54,324 Blah, blah, blah, blah... 103 00:04:54,526 --> 00:04:57,927 Well, nine times out of 10, that's the anus they checked. 104 00:04:58,497 --> 00:05:00,362 So, say we catch this whistleblower. 105 00:05:00,432 --> 00:05:01,626 What do you think I should do with them? 106 00:05:01,700 --> 00:05:04,601 We should give them a one-way ticket to Montego Bay. 107 00:05:05,337 --> 00:05:06,929 Where they keep all the al-Qaeda. 108 00:05:08,340 --> 00:05:12,106 Uh, that's Guantanamo Bay. Yes. 109 00:05:12,344 --> 00:05:13,606 You put them in jail for a long time, 110 00:05:13,679 --> 00:05:15,544 you put them in jail for as long as you can. 111 00:05:15,614 --> 00:05:17,241 Well, I guess we're all right, Michael. 112 00:05:17,582 --> 00:05:19,982 I want these people to really pay. I want them to suffer. 113 00:05:20,686 --> 00:05:22,711 I'd prefer it if they died. 114 00:05:22,788 --> 00:05:23,812 Because it's not right. 115 00:05:23,889 --> 00:05:24,981 Yeah. Okay. 116 00:05:25,157 --> 00:05:27,125 Hey, Dwight. Hey, IT guy. 117 00:05:27,492 --> 00:05:29,050 You mind if I get in there for a second? 118 00:05:29,127 --> 00:05:30,492 Oh, sure thing, go ahead. 119 00:05:32,564 --> 00:05:34,555 Just... 120 00:05:34,633 --> 00:05:35,998 Dwight, what the hell? 121 00:05:36,068 --> 00:05:38,229 Apache persuasion hold, that's the hell. 122 00:05:38,303 --> 00:05:39,429 What are you doing to my computer? 123 00:05:39,504 --> 00:05:42,803 The lawyers are searching our hard drives for information on the leak. 124 00:05:43,008 --> 00:05:43,997 Thanks a lot, Big Brother. 125 00:05:44,076 --> 00:05:45,202 You're with Big Brother? 126 00:05:45,277 --> 00:05:47,040 Okay, go ahead. I got nothing to hide. 127 00:05:47,579 --> 00:05:48,978 Wait, are they searching all our computers? 128 00:05:49,047 --> 00:05:50,105 Yeah. 129 00:05:50,716 --> 00:05:52,809 I already got to yours, Kev. 130 00:05:55,654 --> 00:05:58,817 No, that's cool. Sometimes I run. 131 00:05:59,691 --> 00:06:01,249 I'm a runner. 132 00:06:01,860 --> 00:06:03,452 Everybody knows it was Andy, 133 00:06:03,528 --> 00:06:07,328 and it is not fair for us all to take the fall for his big, stupid mouth. 134 00:06:07,399 --> 00:06:09,390 Ridiculous, Angela. 135 00:06:09,468 --> 00:06:11,368 And like I'm going to believe one of his spurned lovers. 136 00:06:11,870 --> 00:06:15,499 Look, he's been complaining about this for a while. It's not crazy. 137 00:06:21,880 --> 00:06:23,472 Okay, Dwight. Hold that thought. 138 00:06:23,548 --> 00:06:24,537 I don't want to waste your time 139 00:06:24,616 --> 00:06:26,083 and I wouldn't dare waste mine. 140 00:06:26,151 --> 00:06:27,209 I didn't do it. 141 00:06:27,285 --> 00:06:29,219 Now, I don't know exactly who did it, 142 00:06:29,821 --> 00:06:32,688 but I have a list right here. 143 00:06:33,625 --> 00:06:35,456 You should fire the following people. 144 00:06:35,994 --> 00:06:37,393 Well, I'm inclined to believe you. 145 00:06:37,462 --> 00:06:38,759 Why would I disparage a company that has 146 00:06:38,830 --> 00:06:40,354 made me rich beyond my wildest dreams? 147 00:06:40,432 --> 00:06:42,195 Yeah, I noticed you've had a great year. 148 00:06:42,267 --> 00:06:43,734 Good boy. 149 00:06:43,802 --> 00:06:45,929 You turning that money into more money? 150 00:06:48,607 --> 00:06:50,598 Are you referring to alchemy? 151 00:06:51,510 --> 00:06:53,171 I don't like to tell a man what to do with his money, 152 00:06:53,245 --> 00:06:54,678 but if you ain't investing in property, 153 00:06:54,746 --> 00:06:56,077 then you're dumber than a dummy. 154 00:06:56,281 --> 00:06:57,839 I'm not dumb, I'm smart. 155 00:06:58,016 --> 00:07:00,712 Well, buy property. That's my advice. 156 00:07:02,687 --> 00:07:04,552 Is there something that you would like to say to me? 157 00:07:05,157 --> 00:07:08,320 About talking to the press? Uh, I do... No... 158 00:07:08,393 --> 00:07:10,953 I didn't do that. Okay? 159 00:07:12,130 --> 00:07:14,098 Didn't do it. I don't believe you. 160 00:07:14,166 --> 00:07:17,135 I swear on the graves of my parents who aren't even dead yet. 161 00:07:17,402 --> 00:07:19,427 That's a little much. All right, all right. 162 00:07:19,504 --> 00:07:21,096 I don't care. That's how much, I swear. 163 00:07:21,173 --> 00:07:22,663 Okay, I believe you. I believe you. 164 00:07:22,908 --> 00:07:24,569 How come no one's giving Darryl any crap? 165 00:07:24,709 --> 00:07:26,404 He was more bothered about it than me. 166 00:07:29,381 --> 00:07:32,282 Did you tell anyone outside of this office 167 00:07:32,851 --> 00:07:34,648 that the printers were catching on fire? 168 00:07:36,988 --> 00:07:37,977 Yeah, I did. 169 00:07:39,391 --> 00:07:40,949 I was talking to this girl at a bar. 170 00:07:41,259 --> 00:07:42,248 Oh, no, no, no. 171 00:07:42,661 --> 00:07:44,856 I think she could sense my sadness. 172 00:07:44,930 --> 00:07:48,388 And I found out too late that she was a copyeditor at the Trib. 173 00:07:48,467 --> 00:07:49,456 Oh, my God. 174 00:07:49,734 --> 00:07:50,723 Was she cute? 175 00:07:50,969 --> 00:07:53,733 No. Oh, God, Darryl. 176 00:07:53,839 --> 00:07:57,036 I basically swore up and down that none of my employees did it. 177 00:07:57,108 --> 00:07:59,474 And then I find out that one of my best ones did. 178 00:07:59,978 --> 00:08:02,037 And now he's probably going to get fired for it. 179 00:08:03,281 --> 00:08:06,808 And if that is not poetic justice, I don't know what is. 180 00:08:08,787 --> 00:08:11,585 Sounds like you were as blind-sided by this as I was. 181 00:08:11,656 --> 00:08:12,645 Yes. 182 00:08:12,724 --> 00:08:14,658 And we didn't find anything on your computer. 183 00:08:14,860 --> 00:08:15,918 Good. 184 00:08:15,994 --> 00:08:17,393 Except this. 185 00:08:18,063 --> 00:08:22,363 Wow. This is just a mystery novel that I've been working on. 186 00:08:22,567 --> 00:08:24,933 I know what it is. I skimmed the first chapter. 187 00:08:25,070 --> 00:08:26,128 I'm just curious, 188 00:08:26,204 --> 00:08:28,195 why would a man who hates people 189 00:08:28,273 --> 00:08:30,901 want to have a relationship with a maid? 190 00:08:31,910 --> 00:08:33,400 I don't know... The way I look at it, 191 00:08:33,478 --> 00:08:35,139 there's only one of two reasons. 192 00:08:35,213 --> 00:08:38,148 He knows a secret about her that she doesn't know herself. 193 00:08:39,885 --> 00:08:44,185 Or he wants to use her services to mop up after a murder. 194 00:08:45,624 --> 00:08:46,784 Yes. 195 00:08:47,559 --> 00:08:49,220 Write your own damn novel. 196 00:08:50,362 --> 00:08:51,386 It was me. 197 00:08:51,630 --> 00:08:52,688 What was you? 198 00:08:54,099 --> 00:08:56,226 You were the leak? Okay, 199 00:08:56,301 --> 00:08:57,700 I'm talking to this woman at day care, 200 00:08:58,103 --> 00:09:01,300 she's telling me all about her amazing trip to Vietnam. I have nothing. 201 00:09:01,373 --> 00:09:04,035 I tell her our printers catch on fire spontaneously. 202 00:09:04,109 --> 00:09:05,167 Why'd you do that? Her husband's a reporter. 203 00:09:05,243 --> 00:09:06,335 Yeah. 204 00:09:06,811 --> 00:09:09,371 So, now everyone hates Andy, and it's this whole mess, 205 00:09:09,447 --> 00:09:11,608 and I don't know what to do. Okay, just relax. 206 00:09:12,484 --> 00:09:13,883 Just need to relax. 207 00:09:14,085 --> 00:09:17,213 I could tell Jo, or I could tell Michael. 208 00:09:18,356 --> 00:09:20,051 This is a very good idea. This is good. 209 00:09:20,125 --> 00:09:22,719 Let's get all the bad ideas out now. Flush them out. 210 00:09:22,928 --> 00:09:24,122 You leaked it? 211 00:09:24,195 --> 00:09:26,595 I don't know what to do. Do I go tell Jo or... 212 00:09:26,665 --> 00:09:28,530 I don't want everyone to keep blaming the wrong person. 213 00:09:28,600 --> 00:09:30,864 I don't know what the best plan is, Pam. 214 00:09:32,070 --> 00:09:33,332 Oh, God. 215 00:09:33,905 --> 00:09:35,497 My mind is going a mile an hour. 216 00:09:35,574 --> 00:09:36,905 That fast? 217 00:09:38,443 --> 00:09:40,911 Two whistleblowers. Two. 218 00:09:41,846 --> 00:09:42,835 I always thought Darryl and Pam 219 00:09:42,914 --> 00:09:45,314 might get me fired for something I said. 220 00:09:48,153 --> 00:09:49,142 Yeah? 221 00:09:57,896 --> 00:09:59,955 I weirdly know exactly what you're saying to me. 222 00:10:00,131 --> 00:10:01,758 So, I'll see you in Meredith's van in five minutes. 223 00:10:01,900 --> 00:10:03,629 Okay, you didn't need to actually say that. 224 00:10:05,303 --> 00:10:07,533 I have never seen so many parking tickets. 225 00:10:08,006 --> 00:10:09,667 All right, this is just messed up. 226 00:10:09,741 --> 00:10:11,402 No, you know what's messed up? 227 00:10:11,476 --> 00:10:14,707 This situation all up in here is what's messed up. 228 00:10:14,779 --> 00:10:16,770 We need to brainstorm, we need to get out of this. 229 00:10:16,848 --> 00:10:19,715 Brain-hurricane, come on. Think. What have we got? 230 00:10:19,784 --> 00:10:20,876 Um... 231 00:10:21,886 --> 00:10:23,183 Hey, guys, sorry I'm late. 232 00:10:23,254 --> 00:10:24,312 We're not going for yogurt. 233 00:10:24,389 --> 00:10:26,914 It's okay, she's cool. She also whistle-blew. 234 00:10:26,992 --> 00:10:29,586 Guys, I couldn't help it. It is so boring where we work. 235 00:10:29,661 --> 00:10:31,526 I mean, it's as interesting as a morgue. 236 00:10:31,663 --> 00:10:33,528 It might be less interesting than a morgue. 237 00:10:33,732 --> 00:10:36,030 Hey, hey, it's as interesting as a morgue. 238 00:10:36,201 --> 00:10:38,396 Of course I'm the leak. I think I tweeted it. 239 00:10:38,670 --> 00:10:39,898 I can't control what I say to people. 240 00:10:39,971 --> 00:10:41,097 I spend the whole day talking. 241 00:10:41,172 --> 00:10:45,302 I mean, I video chat, I skype, I text, I tweet, I phone, I woof. 242 00:10:45,744 --> 00:10:47,006 Woof is a site that I'm launching to be 243 00:10:47,078 --> 00:10:48,705 the last word in social networking. 244 00:10:48,780 --> 00:10:50,805 For just $12.99 a month, Woof links up 245 00:10:50,882 --> 00:10:51,906 all your communication portals, 246 00:10:51,983 --> 00:10:53,314 so you are always within reach. 247 00:10:53,385 --> 00:10:54,875 It's part of the dog pack, as I call it. 248 00:10:54,953 --> 00:10:57,751 But look, why tell you, 249 00:10:57,822 --> 00:11:00,382 when I can show you? 250 00:11:00,859 --> 00:11:02,884 I just sent myself a woof. 251 00:11:05,797 --> 00:11:07,196 Ryan, you have a woof on line one. 252 00:11:07,265 --> 00:11:08,732 Thank you, Erin. 253 00:11:09,334 --> 00:11:10,426 Woof! 254 00:11:10,602 --> 00:11:14,698 Okay, here's what we do. I say we just smash all the computers. 255 00:11:14,873 --> 00:11:17,171 We destroy the evidence. No evidence, no case. 256 00:11:17,242 --> 00:11:19,540 Wouldn't we get fired for smashing all the computers? 257 00:11:19,611 --> 00:11:22,808 No, okay, not all the computers. Just our computers. 258 00:11:22,881 --> 00:11:24,439 That idea sucks. PAM: I don't think that's a good idea. 259 00:11:24,516 --> 00:11:25,540 Just don't say no. 260 00:11:25,617 --> 00:11:28,381 Mike, you know you don't have to turn us all in. 261 00:11:29,721 --> 00:11:31,689 All you need is one scapegoat. 262 00:11:32,524 --> 00:11:34,515 Uh, if you turn me in, I'm turning in Darryl. 263 00:11:34,693 --> 00:11:37,890 That's just what we need, another black man in prison, you know? 264 00:11:37,962 --> 00:11:40,624 Nobody's going to prison. Okay? 265 00:11:41,599 --> 00:11:45,330 All right, Michael, you need to convince Jo to go easy on us. 266 00:11:45,403 --> 00:11:48,099 And then we'll all confess once we know our jobs are safe. 267 00:11:48,540 --> 00:11:50,565 Okay, you can count on me. 268 00:11:53,378 --> 00:11:54,777 Let me give you a hand. 269 00:11:54,946 --> 00:11:56,140 Ready? On three. 270 00:11:58,850 --> 00:12:00,647 Oh, shoot. Got it? 271 00:12:00,719 --> 00:12:01,947 Got it. 272 00:12:03,354 --> 00:12:04,378 Dwight Schrute. 273 00:12:04,456 --> 00:12:06,321 The property you're looking at is in great shape. 274 00:12:06,391 --> 00:12:08,951 By the way, it has a very spacious basement office. 275 00:12:09,260 --> 00:12:12,593 Basement office? You mean like a lair? 276 00:12:14,132 --> 00:12:16,191 Hey, Jo. Michael. 277 00:12:17,168 --> 00:12:19,102 I was thinking about our little leak problem. 278 00:12:19,170 --> 00:12:20,364 I was up all lunch thinking about 279 00:12:20,438 --> 00:12:22,269 what we should do to this individual. 280 00:12:23,308 --> 00:12:25,105 You know what I think we should do? 281 00:12:25,176 --> 00:12:28,634 We make them come to work. And we work them, 282 00:12:28,713 --> 00:12:32,012 and we make them sit next to all the people they screwed over. 283 00:12:32,584 --> 00:12:34,643 And we pay them, 284 00:12:34,719 --> 00:12:39,179 but we make them feel like they did something really wrong. 285 00:12:39,324 --> 00:12:41,690 The one question I have is, "Do we give them a Christmas bonus?" 286 00:12:41,860 --> 00:12:44,385 I say yes, it's Christmas, 287 00:12:44,462 --> 00:12:47,761 but right after, they're back into the thick of it. 288 00:12:47,832 --> 00:12:49,459 Michael Scott. 289 00:12:50,802 --> 00:12:52,201 What do you know? 290 00:12:52,971 --> 00:12:54,165 What? 291 00:12:55,240 --> 00:12:56,537 It doesn't matter what I know. 292 00:12:56,608 --> 00:12:58,701 If it doesn't matter, then tell me. Why? 293 00:12:58,777 --> 00:13:01,302 Because I wanna deal with it the way I deal with it. 294 00:13:01,379 --> 00:13:03,176 Well, deal with this. 295 00:13:05,150 --> 00:13:07,015 Empathize with me for a moment. 296 00:13:07,085 --> 00:13:08,712 I came up here with a big problem, 297 00:13:08,787 --> 00:13:10,652 and now, I've got a branch manager 298 00:13:10,722 --> 00:13:12,485 who's giving me the silent treatment. 299 00:13:14,159 --> 00:13:15,319 Speak to me. 300 00:13:16,694 --> 00:13:17,683 Speak. 301 00:13:22,066 --> 00:13:23,260 Come with me. 302 00:13:23,835 --> 00:13:24,824 What? 303 00:13:27,772 --> 00:13:32,175 Are you leaving? Oh, my. Should I continue with the investigation? 304 00:13:45,723 --> 00:13:47,247 Are you gonna kill me? 305 00:13:53,264 --> 00:13:55,255 I just need you to come by later and sign a few forms. 306 00:13:55,333 --> 00:13:57,631 Okay. What time works for you? 307 00:13:59,070 --> 00:14:01,732 Mr. Schrute? What time works? 308 00:14:04,976 --> 00:14:09,276 Cancel it. I want you to make an offer at 1725 Slough Avenue. 309 00:14:10,114 --> 00:14:12,275 Make them an offer they can't refuse. 310 00:14:12,350 --> 00:14:14,784 No, on second thought, lowball them. 311 00:14:15,587 --> 00:14:17,350 Don't call me till you have it. 312 00:14:17,422 --> 00:14:18,480 But... 313 00:14:20,458 --> 00:14:22,050 Are we going someplace far away? 314 00:14:22,126 --> 00:14:24,321 I know you said no questions, 315 00:14:27,131 --> 00:14:29,656 but I have an early dinner that I need to get to. 316 00:14:31,336 --> 00:14:32,803 With the chief of police. 317 00:14:33,371 --> 00:14:35,737 I'm very relieved to learn it wasn't you. 318 00:14:36,808 --> 00:14:39,106 All right. Stan, you're up. 319 00:14:39,377 --> 00:14:40,674 It wasn't me. 320 00:14:41,446 --> 00:14:43,744 What a rich timbre your voice has. 321 00:14:44,315 --> 00:14:47,375 Okay, I am prepared to conclude the investigation. 322 00:14:48,620 --> 00:14:50,520 And? You did it. 323 00:14:51,222 --> 00:14:53,747 What? Based on what? 324 00:14:54,192 --> 00:14:57,753 Just all the evidence. And it really seems like it was you. 325 00:14:58,463 --> 00:15:00,397 Can we all agree to say that it was Andy for now 326 00:15:00,465 --> 00:15:02,524 and sit with it, see how it feels? 327 00:15:02,600 --> 00:15:03,999 All right, sounds good. Okay. 328 00:15:04,068 --> 00:15:05,831 Guys, I think that seems a little unfair. 329 00:15:05,904 --> 00:15:08,099 I mean, I feel like we don't definitely know it was Andy. 330 00:15:08,172 --> 00:15:12,768 Yeah, you know? I mean, for all we know, it could have been Jim. 331 00:15:13,645 --> 00:15:14,669 Really? 332 00:15:14,746 --> 00:15:16,304 Michael. I have rights. 333 00:15:16,881 --> 00:15:17,973 Let's just talk. 334 00:15:18,049 --> 00:15:19,744 I am not going to tell you anything. 335 00:15:20,218 --> 00:15:23,051 Honey, you don't seem like your normal self. 336 00:15:24,422 --> 00:15:26,356 Well, I'm going through a little bit of a rough patch. 337 00:15:26,424 --> 00:15:28,415 Mama Jo knew there was something up. 338 00:15:28,493 --> 00:15:30,358 The whole year, actually. 339 00:15:31,296 --> 00:15:33,161 My favorite restaurant closed down. Oh. 340 00:15:33,598 --> 00:15:34,826 I hate that. 341 00:15:34,899 --> 00:15:37,459 And my new favorite restaurant sucks. 342 00:15:40,305 --> 00:15:42,273 I bought a video camera last year 343 00:15:42,340 --> 00:15:44,069 and I was looking at the tapes, 344 00:15:44,375 --> 00:15:48,243 and there were only, like, 12 minutes that I felt was worth taping. 345 00:15:48,313 --> 00:15:49,837 The whole year. 346 00:15:50,415 --> 00:15:52,815 And most of that was just birds in my condo complex. 347 00:15:53,284 --> 00:15:54,478 What is that? 348 00:15:57,322 --> 00:15:58,755 And I miss Holly. 349 00:15:59,357 --> 00:16:00,790 Who's Holly? 350 00:16:00,959 --> 00:16:03,689 Holly Flax. From the Nashua branch. 351 00:16:04,329 --> 00:16:06,854 Best HR rep that Dunder Mifflin has ever seen. 352 00:16:09,934 --> 00:16:12,334 It has not been a blockbuster year for me financially. 353 00:16:12,770 --> 00:16:14,670 My Blockbuster stock is down. 354 00:16:15,440 --> 00:16:17,874 I think that the real question is, 355 00:16:18,776 --> 00:16:20,573 "Who is the whistleblower?" 356 00:16:21,245 --> 00:16:22,234 Just... 357 00:16:22,580 --> 00:16:25,140 I may have heard from an old client and I may have immediately 358 00:16:25,216 --> 00:16:28,674 started spreading the news to other clients and potential clients, yeah. 359 00:16:29,587 --> 00:16:30,952 But I'm not here to talk about that. 360 00:16:31,022 --> 00:16:34,458 I'm here to talk about Suck it. Suck it... 361 00:16:34,525 --> 00:16:37,722 Gabe, I told you all about the printers. 362 00:16:37,795 --> 00:16:38,955 I mean, it could be you, Gabe. 363 00:16:39,330 --> 00:16:40,797 Yes, it's totally obvious. I mean, that's the point. 364 00:16:40,898 --> 00:16:44,231 I think we all can agree it's either Gabe or Angela. 365 00:16:44,836 --> 00:16:46,428 It's Angela. Get her, boys. 366 00:16:47,038 --> 00:16:49,165 Hey, guys. Sorry to interrupt. 367 00:16:49,240 --> 00:16:50,832 I just wanted to say goodbye to everyone. 368 00:16:50,908 --> 00:16:52,136 Through Teach For America, 369 00:16:52,210 --> 00:16:53,234 I'm going to go down to Detroit 370 00:16:53,311 --> 00:16:55,211 and teach inner-city kids about computers. 371 00:16:55,847 --> 00:16:57,246 Not now. NICK: Yeah, it's just that my friends 372 00:16:57,315 --> 00:16:59,340 are in the car waiting, so I thought I'd... 373 00:16:59,550 --> 00:17:01,780 Phyllis, what's this guy's name again? 374 00:17:01,919 --> 00:17:05,218 I don't know. Is it Shadow or Garth? It's something weird, I... 375 00:17:05,390 --> 00:17:06,482 My name is Nick. 376 00:17:06,557 --> 00:17:09,390 Okay, well, "Nick," we're in a meeting. 377 00:17:09,761 --> 00:17:13,754 Okay, look, I get it, people. I'm the lame IT guy and everybody hates me. 378 00:17:14,165 --> 00:17:15,792 Hey, listen, man, you can't take it personally. 379 00:17:16,167 --> 00:17:18,158 You call me "man"? I just said my name, 380 00:17:18,236 --> 00:17:19,863 just now. Did you forget it already? 381 00:17:19,937 --> 00:17:20,926 No, 382 00:17:22,106 --> 00:17:23,164 sport. 383 00:17:23,875 --> 00:17:26,469 You guys have 15 parties a week. You can't learn my name? 384 00:17:26,544 --> 00:17:28,978 Hey, hey, hey, IT guy. 385 00:17:29,047 --> 00:17:30,309 Here's the story, champ. 386 00:17:30,381 --> 00:17:32,246 None of us have spent a lot of time getting to know you, okay? 387 00:17:32,316 --> 00:17:35,877 We liked the last guy, Sadiq, because he kept to himself. 388 00:17:35,953 --> 00:17:37,545 And we also thought he might have been a terrorist. 389 00:17:37,789 --> 00:17:39,814 You know what? I'm going to leave you with one other thought. 390 00:17:39,891 --> 00:17:43,418 Inner-city kids use computers for two things, games and porn. 391 00:17:43,494 --> 00:17:46,327 So, good luck wasting your life, Lurch. 392 00:17:46,397 --> 00:17:47,864 Thank you so much for that. 393 00:17:47,932 --> 00:17:49,923 I saw all of your hard drives. And guess what? 394 00:17:50,568 --> 00:17:53,469 You're not a photographer. And you definitely can't fit into a size two. 395 00:17:53,538 --> 00:17:55,165 Darryl, man, you're on Facebook. 396 00:17:55,239 --> 00:17:56,934 Why have you been telling people you're not on Facebook? 397 00:17:57,175 --> 00:17:58,836 - People want to be your friend, man. - Hey. 398 00:17:59,210 --> 00:18:01,576 All right? And you... This guy. 399 00:18:01,746 --> 00:18:02,838 You're the one who told the press. 400 00:18:02,914 --> 00:18:04,245 You wrote an e-mail to the editor. 401 00:18:04,315 --> 00:18:06,340 I saw it and I also saw a Quicktime movie 402 00:18:06,417 --> 00:18:08,783 of your little printer fire test on your hard drive. 403 00:18:08,853 --> 00:18:12,084 This guy's the snitch, he's the snitch. So, that's it. Check it out. 404 00:18:14,826 --> 00:18:16,760 We're going to believe that guy? 405 00:18:17,695 --> 00:18:19,356 When I was growing up, 406 00:18:19,430 --> 00:18:23,093 there was nothing better than being a big old business tycoon. 407 00:18:23,935 --> 00:18:26,062 And I thought I'd break that glass ceiling 408 00:18:26,137 --> 00:18:29,334 and be a hero to all those little girls out there. 409 00:18:30,274 --> 00:18:32,333 And they'd make a Barbie out of me. 410 00:18:34,879 --> 00:18:37,177 I hate that I sell cheap printers. 411 00:18:38,316 --> 00:18:39,408 I do. 412 00:18:40,685 --> 00:18:42,710 But if I have to go out there in front of the press 413 00:18:42,787 --> 00:18:45,984 and make one of them public apology recalls, 414 00:18:46,057 --> 00:18:50,551 I mean, that's all I'll ever be remembered for. 415 00:18:51,162 --> 00:18:53,289 Nobody will want to play with my Barbie. 416 00:18:56,033 --> 00:18:58,058 Well, you know, I would be willing, 417 00:18:58,136 --> 00:18:59,694 under the right circumstances, 418 00:18:59,770 --> 00:19:01,328 to do that for you. 419 00:19:01,439 --> 00:19:04,704 Oh, honey, surely you don't want that. 420 00:19:07,011 --> 00:19:09,707 I surely do, and don't call me honey. 421 00:19:16,087 --> 00:19:17,384 Airplane II. 422 00:19:17,655 --> 00:19:19,714 I'm about to buy this building, you know? 423 00:19:21,325 --> 00:19:22,849 You don't say. 424 00:19:23,227 --> 00:19:26,390 I own a one-eighth share in a rental property down in Pittston. 425 00:19:26,664 --> 00:19:29,189 Well, I'm one-eighths proud of you. 426 00:19:31,202 --> 00:19:32,829 Enjoy that chair for now. 427 00:19:34,071 --> 00:19:37,268 'Cause pretty soon you will be on your feet. 428 00:19:37,775 --> 00:19:39,402 Like Buckingham Palace. 429 00:19:44,615 --> 00:19:46,515 Hey, Phyllis, have you seen my bag? 430 00:19:48,553 --> 00:19:49,815 You deserve it. 431 00:19:50,721 --> 00:19:53,417 Look, I didn't want houses and schools 432 00:19:53,491 --> 00:19:55,891 to burn down and children to die. 433 00:19:57,695 --> 00:19:59,026 Does that make me a hero? 434 00:19:59,096 --> 00:20:00,961 No, it does not. 435 00:20:03,401 --> 00:20:06,063 Well, it doesn't make me the worst guy in the world, either. 436 00:20:06,137 --> 00:20:07,365 It does! 437 00:20:09,874 --> 00:20:11,739 Andy? Hey. 438 00:20:12,176 --> 00:20:16,977 I wanted to say that I think it was very brave of you to go to the press. 439 00:20:24,488 --> 00:20:25,785 Thanks. 440 00:20:26,624 --> 00:20:28,421 Yeah, you know. 441 00:20:29,660 --> 00:20:31,651 Just seemed like the right thing to do. 442 00:20:31,729 --> 00:20:32,718 Yeah. 443 00:20:38,469 --> 00:20:40,130 "We at Sabre have betrayed the trust 444 00:20:40,204 --> 00:20:42,331 "that we have built with our customers. 445 00:20:42,406 --> 00:20:46,502 "We regret our slow response and our lapse in candor and judgment. 446 00:20:47,078 --> 00:20:52,038 "At this time, we are issuing a full recall of all Sabre GH400 printers. 447 00:20:52,783 --> 00:20:55,217 "We will not rest until this problem is solved. 448 00:20:55,353 --> 00:20:58,652 "There will be no questions." Are there any questions? 449 00:21:04,262 --> 00:21:07,561 Hey, I appreciate you reading that statement. You looked pretty up there. 450 00:21:07,632 --> 00:21:08,826 That was fun. 451 00:21:08,899 --> 00:21:10,696 I hope your rough patch ends soon. 452 00:21:10,768 --> 00:21:12,099 Thanks. Today helped. 453 00:21:12,603 --> 00:21:15,265 Well, give a shout if I can brighten your life. 454 00:21:15,539 --> 00:21:18,633 Okay. Hey, you could transfer Holly back from Nashua. 455 00:21:21,312 --> 00:21:22,574 Let me see what I can do.