1
00:00:04,905 --> 00:00:07,135
What?
Oh, nothing.

2
00:00:08,909 --> 00:00:10,740
Pam's on vacation

3
00:00:10,811 --> 00:00:13,803
and she gets back tomorrow,
so it'll be nice to see her.

4
00:00:13,881 --> 00:00:14,939
It'll be nice.

5
00:00:15,015 --> 00:00:18,075
And she set a date
for the wedding with Roy.

6
00:00:18,652 --> 00:00:21,712
June. Summer.
So, that'll be nice.

7
00:00:22,923 --> 00:00:24,447
And that's that.

8
00:00:27,561 --> 00:00:30,223
What?
Oh, nothing.

9
00:00:32,766 --> 00:00:36,702
Jim's been looking at me,
kind of, a lot all week.

10
00:00:37,771 --> 00:00:39,398
I would be creeped out by it,

11
00:00:39,473 --> 00:00:42,840
but it's nothing compared to
the way Michael looks at me.

12
00:01:27,454 --> 00:01:28,819
Spamster!

13
00:01:31,492 --> 00:01:33,722
Pam, plus Spam, plus...

14
00:01:33,794 --> 00:01:35,056
Hamster.
Right.

15
00:01:35,129 --> 00:01:37,359
Welcome back. How was your
vacation? It was great.

16
00:01:37,431 --> 00:01:39,228
Yeah? Did you get lucky?

17
00:01:40,434 --> 00:01:41,560
Boink.

18
00:01:41,635 --> 00:01:44,126
Roy and I just got back
from the Poconos.

19
00:01:44,605 --> 00:01:46,573
I get 10 vacation days a year

20
00:01:46,640 --> 00:01:50,041
and I try to hold off taking
them for as long as possible.

21
00:01:50,311 --> 00:01:53,803
And this year I got to
the third week in January.

22
00:01:55,182 --> 00:01:57,980
"I am Pam. " Spicoli guy.

23
00:01:58,485 --> 00:02:00,419
Oh, God.

24
00:02:00,788 --> 00:02:02,483
Names, numbers. Okay.

25
00:02:02,556 --> 00:02:05,525
Whoa! God! Yuck! Yuck! Yuck!

26
00:02:05,626 --> 00:02:08,060
What? Yuck! Wow, what happened in there?

27
00:02:08,128 --> 00:02:11,620
I don't know. There is
stink in there. My God.

28
00:02:11,899 --> 00:02:13,662
What is that?

29
00:02:14,034 --> 00:02:16,002
Oh, I don't know.
Is that a bird?

30
00:02:16,070 --> 00:02:18,903
No, I don't think it's a bird. Oh, God.

31
00:02:18,973 --> 00:02:22,841
How could that happen? How could...
Right in the middle of the carpet.

32
00:02:22,910 --> 00:02:24,036
What's going on?

33
00:02:24,111 --> 00:02:27,205
Somebody vomited right in the
middle of the carpet in my office.

34
00:02:27,281 --> 00:02:30,079
I don't think that's vomit.
Check it out.

35
00:02:30,150 --> 00:02:31,845
Me?
Check it out.

36
00:02:34,455 --> 00:02:37,754
Don't be a wuss. Just get...
No, I'm not holding your coffee.

37
00:02:37,825 --> 00:02:39,816
Tell me what it is.
Oh, that's ridiculous.

38
00:02:39,893 --> 00:02:41,190
What is it?

39
00:02:42,162 --> 00:02:43,493
Michael.
What is it?

40
00:02:43,564 --> 00:02:44,963
No, just tell me what it is!

41
00:02:45,032 --> 00:02:48,729
Michael, I gotta get out of here.
I can't hold my breath that long.

42
00:02:48,802 --> 00:02:50,167
Open the door up.

43
00:02:50,537 --> 00:02:52,471
It smelled terrible.

44
00:02:57,378 --> 00:02:58,902
Oh!
Jeez...

45
00:02:59,346 --> 00:03:00,745
Oh, no...

46
00:03:02,683 --> 00:03:04,913
I cannot believe a pipe
burst and left that there.

47
00:03:04,985 --> 00:03:08,045
That's no burst pipe. How do
you know that? What is it then?

48
00:03:08,122 --> 00:03:10,454
Hey, guys.
Somebody making soup?

49
00:03:14,028 --> 00:03:17,156
Here she comes.
All clean? Great.

50
00:03:20,801 --> 00:03:22,792
It's still stinky.
That is worse.

51
00:03:22,870 --> 00:03:26,328
She probably scrubbed it
into the fibers of the carpet.

52
00:03:26,540 --> 00:03:28,167
Total permeation.

53
00:03:28,275 --> 00:03:30,300
I am a big Fear Factor fan.

54
00:03:31,078 --> 00:03:33,945
I'm a big fan of anything
Joe Rogan does, actually.

55
00:03:34,148 --> 00:03:36,810
So this is sort of
like my audition tape.

56
00:03:41,655 --> 00:03:45,284
I can't stand it. I can't stay
in here another second.

57
00:03:45,526 --> 00:03:46,652
No!

58
00:03:48,996 --> 00:03:51,692
Hey. Welcome back.
Thanks!

59
00:03:51,765 --> 00:03:55,667
So, how was the resort?
Did you ski a lot? A little.

60
00:03:56,837 --> 00:03:57,997
Good.

61
00:03:59,173 --> 00:04:00,868
What's going on in here?

62
00:04:02,843 --> 00:04:05,243
What? I did not do that.

63
00:04:06,313 --> 00:04:07,974
That sounds disgusting.

64
00:04:09,316 --> 00:04:10,806
It wasn't me.

65
00:04:13,087 --> 00:04:15,647
It wasn't me. It was not me.

66
00:04:17,191 --> 00:04:18,180
Oh.

67
00:04:19,593 --> 00:04:20,855
Wow.

68
00:04:26,467 --> 00:04:27,491
Hey, Jim.

69
00:04:27,568 --> 00:04:31,334
I thought that we would be desk
buddies while they changed my carpet.

70
00:04:31,972 --> 00:04:34,873
That might be a little
difficult with the one computer.

71
00:04:34,942 --> 00:04:36,432
Oh, it's...

72
00:04:36,510 --> 00:04:39,411
There's definitely a desk
open in the back. Yeah.

73
00:04:41,415 --> 00:04:42,677
Which I guess I'll be taking.

74
00:04:42,750 --> 00:04:44,342
No, no, no. Seriously,
I don't mind sharing.

75
00:04:44,418 --> 00:04:47,319
No, no, no. Seriously,
I'll be in the back.

76
00:04:51,158 --> 00:04:52,625
Hey, Kelly.

77
00:04:54,261 --> 00:04:55,922
Are you moving back here?

78
00:04:55,996 --> 00:04:58,863
Just for the day,
while Michael's at my desk.

79
00:04:58,932 --> 00:05:00,559
Because Toby
used to sit there,

80
00:05:00,634 --> 00:05:03,626
but then he had to move over
there because of an allergy.

81
00:05:03,704 --> 00:05:06,867
Allergy to... the desk?

82
00:05:07,574 --> 00:05:08,871
Weird.

83
00:05:10,077 --> 00:05:13,308
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Old bullpen.

84
00:05:14,448 --> 00:05:17,178
The old bullpen.
Don't ape me.

85
00:05:17,251 --> 00:05:18,275
Okay.

86
00:05:18,352 --> 00:05:20,877
This is great.
Yeah.

87
00:05:21,221 --> 00:05:23,189
The pressures
of my office are insane.

88
00:05:23,257 --> 00:05:26,954
I just... You couldn't understand, but
man, you guys have it easy out here.

89
00:05:27,027 --> 00:05:29,393
You know, I used
to sit right here?

90
00:05:29,463 --> 00:05:30,930
No way.
Yeah.

91
00:05:31,265 --> 00:05:33,233
And who had your office?

92
00:05:34,168 --> 00:05:35,499
Ed Truck.

93
00:05:36,703 --> 00:05:40,696
Ed Truck was the manager before
me. Horrible. He hated fun.

94
00:05:40,908 --> 00:05:44,207
It was like, "Oh, Ed Truck is
walking toward us, so stop having fun.

95
00:05:44,278 --> 00:05:46,212
"Start pretending to do work. "

96
00:05:46,713 --> 00:05:48,772
What a jerk. He's...

97
00:05:49,082 --> 00:05:51,380
You know what?
I swore to myself

98
00:05:51,452 --> 00:05:53,647
that if I ever got to walk
around the room as manager,

99
00:05:53,720 --> 00:05:56,052
people would laugh
when they saw me coming

100
00:05:56,123 --> 00:05:58,853
and would applaud
as I walked away.

101
00:05:59,126 --> 00:06:02,323
I'm serious. My closet doors
will not shut.

102
00:06:02,396 --> 00:06:05,797
I mean, it only takes so long to measure
to make sure that clothes will hang up.

103
00:06:05,866 --> 00:06:08,027
'Cause aren't all hangers,
like, that big?

104
00:06:08,101 --> 00:06:10,831
So I don't understand why the
closet engineer didn't think of that.

105
00:06:10,904 --> 00:06:12,462
So now I'm doing
this new thing

106
00:06:12,539 --> 00:06:14,564
where I just leave piles
of clothes on the floor

107
00:06:14,641 --> 00:06:16,802
and I walk around the piles
to get an outfit...

108
00:06:17,311 --> 00:06:18,676
You know who used
to sit at that desk?

109
00:06:18,745 --> 00:06:21,873
That guy Miles, who quit
to form his own company?

110
00:06:22,382 --> 00:06:23,679
Todd Packer.
No.

111
00:06:23,750 --> 00:06:25,217
Yeah. I thought he was out on the road.

112
00:06:25,285 --> 00:06:26,946
He was, but

113
00:06:27,654 --> 00:06:30,885
that desk was empty. He'd come
in and sit there sometimes.

114
00:06:33,861 --> 00:06:37,194
When I was in training, many
years ago, not so long ago,

115
00:06:37,998 --> 00:06:41,434
I worked side-by-side with
a fellow named Todd Packer.

116
00:06:42,035 --> 00:06:44,435
And together
we rocked the office.

117
00:06:47,908 --> 00:06:51,503
Packer and I once spent a
whole day with our pants off.

118
00:06:51,812 --> 00:06:54,645
And when people noticed, we
convinced them that they were crazy.

119
00:06:54,715 --> 00:06:57,707
I will gladly pay you Tuesday
for a hamburger today.

120
00:06:57,784 --> 00:06:59,581
Excuse me one second, please?

121
00:06:59,653 --> 00:07:02,315
What is it that you need
right now that can't wait

122
00:07:02,389 --> 00:07:04,118
until I'm off the phone
with a customer?

123
00:07:04,191 --> 00:07:06,989
A customer.
Well, sound the alarm.

124
00:07:08,262 --> 00:07:09,388
Okay.

125
00:07:09,463 --> 00:07:13,126
Another time, Packer held this guy's
head in the toilet for like, a minute.

126
00:07:13,200 --> 00:07:16,226
The guy had no sense of humor about
it. Probably why he wasn't hired.

127
00:07:17,638 --> 00:07:19,936
What did you hit me for?
Charley horse!

128
00:07:20,007 --> 00:07:21,531
What?
Charley horse!

129
00:07:21,608 --> 00:07:23,576
You shouldn't have
hit me, Michael. Okay.

130
00:07:23,644 --> 00:07:27,842
Once, as a joke, Packer banged
every chick in the office.

131
00:07:28,048 --> 00:07:29,777
It was hysterical.

132
00:07:30,918 --> 00:07:34,911
Beyonce, pink the color,
Pink the person,

133
00:07:35,088 --> 00:07:38,023
hot dogs, basically
anything that is awesome.

134
00:07:38,392 --> 00:07:40,087
Snow cones...
Hey, Jim,

135
00:07:40,160 --> 00:07:43,789
Michael wanted me to ask you
how to raise your desk chair.

136
00:07:44,064 --> 00:07:47,659
It's the lever on the side.
That's what I told him. Thanks.

137
00:07:52,406 --> 00:07:55,637
Oh, my God, he is so cute.

138
00:07:56,276 --> 00:07:59,177
Would you talk to him for me
and see if he likes me?

139
00:08:00,280 --> 00:08:03,807
No, I don't think I can... Oh,
please, Jim. Please, please, Jim.

140
00:08:03,884 --> 00:08:06,944
Please, please, please, he's
so cute. I like him so much.

141
00:08:07,020 --> 00:08:10,888
And I would do it, but I'm too shy.
Please, Jim. Please, please, please.

142
00:08:10,958 --> 00:08:13,756
Please, Jim. Please,
please, please.

143
00:08:14,061 --> 00:08:16,154
Dwight?
Michael.

144
00:08:17,264 --> 00:08:19,289
Let's send up Accounting.

145
00:08:20,467 --> 00:08:23,163
What? Old-fashioned
raid. Sales on Accounting.

146
00:08:23,937 --> 00:08:25,768
Yeah, follow my lead.

147
00:08:28,742 --> 00:08:29,970
Hey, guys.

148
00:08:30,077 --> 00:08:31,738
Hey, Michael.
What's up?

149
00:08:31,812 --> 00:08:32,801
Hey, Dwight.

150
00:08:41,822 --> 00:08:43,983
Come on, come on,
come on, come on!

151
00:08:46,393 --> 00:08:48,327
Sales rules!
Yes!

152
00:08:48,395 --> 00:08:50,260
Yeah!
Yeah!

153
00:08:52,766 --> 00:08:54,290
Should we help them
pick up their stuff?

154
00:08:54,368 --> 00:08:56,336
No, no, no, no. We don't
do that. We don't do that.

155
00:08:56,403 --> 00:08:59,099
Okay.
Watch out, Pam. You're next.

156
00:08:59,172 --> 00:09:00,639
You're gonna throw
my things on the ground?

157
00:09:00,707 --> 00:09:02,004
Maybe.

158
00:09:02,909 --> 00:09:05,070
What happened in
Michael's office was wrong.

159
00:09:05,145 --> 00:09:07,340
I understand it.
It makes sense.

160
00:09:10,584 --> 00:09:12,779
But it was still wrong.

161
00:09:13,153 --> 00:09:16,554
Why would somebody ruin
a perfectly good carpet?

162
00:09:17,557 --> 00:09:19,024
I don't know.

163
00:09:21,194 --> 00:09:24,891
It could be done out of hate.
It could be done out of love.

164
00:09:25,265 --> 00:09:27,563
It could be
completely neutral.

165
00:09:28,101 --> 00:09:30,092
Maybe somebody hates
the cleaning lady.

166
00:09:30,170 --> 00:09:33,003
And, well, she doesn't do
a very good job, obviously,

167
00:09:33,073 --> 00:09:37,339
because my office still reeks
like you would not believe.

168
00:09:38,378 --> 00:09:39,743
I hate her.

169
00:09:43,301 --> 00:09:47,533
You know what? I am beginning to
think that what happened to my carpet

170
00:09:47,872 --> 00:09:51,000
was an act of terrorism
against the office.

171
00:09:51,375 --> 00:09:53,343
The only thing that
makes any sense.

172
00:09:53,411 --> 00:09:55,504
Hello, am I the 107th caller?

173
00:09:58,683 --> 00:10:01,379
Hello, Rock 107,
am I the 107th caller?

174
00:10:04,722 --> 00:10:07,384
Hello, Rock 107,
am I the 107th caller?

175
00:10:08,859 --> 00:10:11,419
I'm totally gonna win
us that box set. Stop.

176
00:10:11,495 --> 00:10:13,486
Jethro Tull...
Stop it.

177
00:10:15,333 --> 00:10:16,800
Stop it.

178
00:10:19,470 --> 00:10:20,630
Don't.

179
00:10:21,572 --> 00:10:22,834
Don't.

180
00:10:23,240 --> 00:10:25,367
I need to make a sales call.

181
00:10:27,178 --> 00:10:29,146
Please?
All right.

182
00:10:39,490 --> 00:10:41,355
Am I the 107th caller?

183
00:10:42,326 --> 00:10:44,590
Back so soon.
We can go back.

184
00:10:44,662 --> 00:10:46,527
We can go back in, like,
a couple of weeks maybe.

185
00:10:46,597 --> 00:10:49,293
Yeah, right. Okay, maybe another month,

186
00:10:49,367 --> 00:10:51,562
like, maybe for, like,
Presidents' Day or something?

187
00:10:51,635 --> 00:10:53,660
Yeah, that's right. We
could do a three-day weekend.

188
00:10:53,738 --> 00:10:56,605
I wonder if I could, like,
call in sick on the Friday.

189
00:10:56,674 --> 00:10:58,039
Then I get
a four-day weekend.

190
00:10:59,610 --> 00:11:00,838
And when I wake up,
I feel fine.

191
00:11:00,911 --> 00:11:02,640
But it's so weird to fall
asleep. And I just hate it

192
00:11:02,713 --> 00:11:05,682
'cause I try to go to bed at,
like, 9:30. Are you kidding?

193
00:11:05,750 --> 00:11:07,115
No.
Hi, guys.

194
00:11:07,184 --> 00:11:09,914
We haven't finished getting things
in order from your last visit.

195
00:11:09,987 --> 00:11:11,079
I'm just walking around.

196
00:11:11,155 --> 00:11:12,520
Were you?
Well, yeah.

197
00:11:12,590 --> 00:11:14,683
It's just that we're really
swamped over here, Michael.

198
00:11:14,759 --> 00:11:16,556
Oh, and I'm not?
Why would you say that?

199
00:11:16,627 --> 00:11:17,992
Because I'm having fun?

200
00:11:18,062 --> 00:11:21,088
You guys just are working
for the weekend, aren't you?

201
00:11:21,165 --> 00:11:22,530
I am working for the week.

202
00:11:22,600 --> 00:11:26,900
Sales team. Listen to me.
This is what we're gonna do.

203
00:11:27,671 --> 00:11:30,139
I'm gonna up the ante
a little bit, literally.

204
00:11:30,207 --> 00:11:32,698
Right here I'm gonna
put a crisp $100 bill.

205
00:11:32,777 --> 00:11:35,769
The person with the most sales at the
end of the day gets to keep the cash.

206
00:11:35,846 --> 00:11:37,336
Sound good?
Yeah!

207
00:11:37,415 --> 00:11:39,645
Seventy, eighty,
one, two, three.

208
00:11:40,084 --> 00:11:44,020
$83. Still a lot of money
and I'm going to...

209
00:11:45,156 --> 00:11:49,559
I'm gonna leave it right over
here where everybody can see it.

210
00:11:50,394 --> 00:11:53,557
I will be taking
Jim's clients today

211
00:11:53,631 --> 00:11:57,465
because he is not here, and out
of sight. Out of the contest.

212
00:11:57,535 --> 00:11:59,662
Let's see who winds up
with the cash, shall we?

213
00:11:59,737 --> 00:12:01,261
You're gonna compete
against us?

214
00:12:01,338 --> 00:12:03,101
Oh, it is on, Phyllis.
It is so on!

215
00:12:03,174 --> 00:12:05,574
It is so on!
God, this is gonna be fun.

216
00:12:07,178 --> 00:12:09,908
Michael is gonna
wipe the floor with us.

217
00:12:19,290 --> 00:12:22,054
So, you have
40 boxes going out

218
00:12:22,126 --> 00:12:24,594
and I will deliver those
personally in a Sebring.

219
00:12:24,662 --> 00:12:27,529
Very good. Nice doing
business with you. Thank you.

220
00:12:27,798 --> 00:12:29,459
Yes!

221
00:12:29,800 --> 00:12:31,461
Oh! Yeah.

222
00:12:31,635 --> 00:12:35,162
Read it and weep.
Oh! Oh, look at that!

223
00:12:35,272 --> 00:12:38,537
Look at me, Phyllis! Oh,
what is that? That's my sale!

224
00:12:46,383 --> 00:12:48,248
What's that? What are
you doing? Nothing.

225
00:12:48,319 --> 00:12:50,344
I think he's dancing.
No, just...

226
00:12:50,421 --> 00:12:51,786
That was definitely
not dancing.

227
00:12:51,856 --> 00:12:53,619
You know what, guys?
It's none of your concern.

228
00:12:53,691 --> 00:12:55,158
It was official business,
so just...

229
00:12:55,226 --> 00:12:56,659
Paper business.
Yeah, paper business.

230
00:12:56,727 --> 00:12:58,422
Is this done?
Nope.

231
00:12:58,929 --> 00:13:01,727
Extreme Home Makeover puts
together a house in an hour.

232
00:13:01,799 --> 00:13:04,700
If you were on that crew,
you'd be fired like that.

233
00:13:05,069 --> 00:13:07,867
Somebody did something bad
to Michael's carpet.

234
00:13:09,173 --> 00:13:11,266
Maybe that's all
we need to know.

235
00:13:17,715 --> 00:13:20,809
Who do you think did it? Are you
kidding? I thought it was you.

236
00:13:20,885 --> 00:13:22,648
Really? I thought you.

237
00:13:30,828 --> 00:13:33,023
This was no act
of God. A person did this.

238
00:13:33,097 --> 00:13:36,464
A person who works in this
office. Maybe all of them.

239
00:13:38,068 --> 00:13:39,433
You know what?

240
00:13:39,603 --> 00:13:43,403
Today is not a good day
for a sales contest.

241
00:13:43,474 --> 00:13:45,374
We're not doing this today.

242
00:13:45,442 --> 00:13:48,240
That doesn't seem fair.
You want to talk about fair?

243
00:13:48,312 --> 00:13:50,837
Does anyone need
to smell my old carpet?

244
00:13:50,915 --> 00:13:54,351
You explain to me how that was fair and
I'll explain to you how this is fair.

245
00:13:54,418 --> 00:13:55,817
Plus, I just...

246
00:13:55,886 --> 00:13:58,081
I think that picking today
was sort of taking advantage.

247
00:13:58,155 --> 00:14:02,114
But you're the one who picked
today. I am a victim of a hate crime.

248
00:14:03,027 --> 00:14:04,517
Stanley knows what
I'm talking about.

249
00:14:04,595 --> 00:14:06,324
That's not what
a hate crime is.

250
00:14:06,397 --> 00:14:10,390
Well, I hated it a lot,
okay. I... You know what?

251
00:14:10,968 --> 00:14:14,768
If the guilty person would just come
forward and take their punishment,

252
00:14:14,838 --> 00:14:16,305
we'd be done.

253
00:14:20,978 --> 00:14:23,310
Very well, then
you're all punished.

254
00:14:23,380 --> 00:14:26,213
What's our punishment?
You're all on a time out.

255
00:14:26,984 --> 00:14:28,849
Just sit there quietly.

256
00:14:32,356 --> 00:14:34,847
No, no.

257
00:14:40,715 --> 00:14:42,478
Hey.
What's up?

258
00:14:42,550 --> 00:14:43,812
Nothing much.

259
00:14:44,285 --> 00:14:47,618
Let me ask you something.
It's actually a little awkward.

260
00:14:48,056 --> 00:14:50,889
What?
What do you think of Kelly?

261
00:14:52,226 --> 00:14:55,753
I don't know. It depends if
you like a little junk in...

262
00:14:57,231 --> 00:14:58,755
She's really cool.

263
00:14:58,833 --> 00:15:01,358
Are you interested in her?
Yeah, totally.

264
00:15:01,603 --> 00:15:03,366
Really?
Did she say something?

265
00:15:03,438 --> 00:15:05,167
She said lots of things.

266
00:15:05,373 --> 00:15:08,103
Do you know if she's looking
for a long-term thing

267
00:15:08,176 --> 00:15:11,043
or if she'd be cool
just hanging out?

268
00:15:12,113 --> 00:15:14,581
I have no idea.
Can you find out?

269
00:15:16,384 --> 00:15:18,614
Yeah. Sure.

270
00:15:20,822 --> 00:15:22,653
Oh, long-term, definitely.

271
00:15:22,724 --> 00:15:26,387
Fall in love, have babies,
spend every second together.

272
00:15:26,461 --> 00:15:29,658
But don't tell him that, okay? Just
tell him I'm, like, up for anything.

273
00:15:29,731 --> 00:15:31,858
I mean, I'm not a slut,
but who knows?

274
00:15:31,933 --> 00:15:34,925
Do you remember Ed Truck?
Sure. He hired me.

275
00:15:35,069 --> 00:15:37,560
How's he doing?
How would I know?

276
00:15:37,939 --> 00:15:39,702
I thought you might.

277
00:15:39,874 --> 00:15:42,069
My biggest fear is
turning into him.

278
00:15:42,143 --> 00:15:44,805
Michael, you should have
much bigger fears than that.

279
00:15:44,879 --> 00:15:47,177
I wasn't talking
literally, Creed.

280
00:15:47,248 --> 00:15:51,207
Yeah, being buried alive would be
worse. Happy? Why am I talking to you?

281
00:15:51,853 --> 00:15:55,482
Ed? Hi, thanks for meeting me.

282
00:15:55,790 --> 00:15:59,692
It must be kind of neat coming
back. Yeah. Shall we go upstairs?

283
00:15:59,961 --> 00:16:03,488
Well, honestly, Ed, I really don't
want to be up there right now.

284
00:16:03,931 --> 00:16:06,092
So, what's the problem
with my pension?

285
00:16:06,167 --> 00:16:09,568
Oh, no, no, no, you're good.
It was clerical. You're good.

286
00:16:10,405 --> 00:16:12,839
Well, somebody did
something in my office

287
00:16:12,907 --> 00:16:16,001
and I now think that they did it on
purpose and it was directed at me.

288
00:16:16,077 --> 00:16:17,339
Well, what was done?

289
00:16:17,412 --> 00:16:20,142
I didn't get
a good look at it,

290
00:16:20,214 --> 00:16:23,012
but it smells horrible.

291
00:16:23,317 --> 00:16:26,514
Yeah, somebody once
did that in my office.

292
00:16:26,921 --> 00:16:27,979
Really?
Yeah.

293
00:16:28,056 --> 00:16:31,025
Well, that figures.
So, how did you deal

294
00:16:31,092 --> 00:16:32,821
with people not liking you?

295
00:16:32,894 --> 00:16:35,556
You can't expect to be
friends with everybody.

296
00:16:35,630 --> 00:16:37,825
Well, sure I can.
No.

297
00:16:37,899 --> 00:16:41,699
They'll always think of you as
a boss first. Not necessarily.

298
00:16:41,769 --> 00:16:44,033
You can love a boss
like you do a father.

299
00:16:44,105 --> 00:16:46,665
I'm not sure that ever
happens. Well, okay.

300
00:16:46,741 --> 00:16:48,868
Different management styles.

301
00:16:48,943 --> 00:16:51,241
Why can't your workers
be your workers,

302
00:16:51,312 --> 00:16:54,213
family be your family,
your friends be your friends?

303
00:16:54,916 --> 00:16:58,374
Last week I would have given a
kidney to anyone in this office.

304
00:16:58,486 --> 00:17:01,819
I would've reached right into my
stomach and pulled it out for them.

305
00:17:01,889 --> 00:17:03,288
But now, no.

306
00:17:03,458 --> 00:17:06,791
I don't have the relationship with
these people that I thought I did.

307
00:17:06,861 --> 00:17:08,294
I hope they ask,

308
00:17:08,963 --> 00:17:10,931
so they can hear me say,

309
00:17:11,799 --> 00:17:15,064
"No. I only give my organs
to my real friends.

310
00:17:15,236 --> 00:17:17,363
"Go get yourself
a monkey kidney. "

311
00:17:18,306 --> 00:17:22,299
Hey, Brenda, this is
Jim Halpert, from the boat?

312
00:17:22,944 --> 00:17:25,777
And I got your number
from the corporate directory,

313
00:17:25,847 --> 00:17:28,907
and well, I was assuming that
you probably gave it to them

314
00:17:28,983 --> 00:17:31,713
because you wanted me
to ask you out, right?

315
00:17:33,087 --> 00:17:35,055
So, give me a call back.

316
00:17:35,456 --> 00:17:37,947
You can get my number
from said directory.

317
00:17:39,327 --> 00:17:42,888
Or just check your e-mail,
'cause I just sent you one.

318
00:17:44,198 --> 00:17:47,599
Yikes. Give me
a call back. I hope.

319
00:17:47,902 --> 00:17:50,029
I'll talk to you later. Bye.

320
00:17:53,207 --> 00:17:55,903
You just asked a girl out
on the phone.

321
00:17:57,578 --> 00:17:58,636
Yep.

322
00:18:01,549 --> 00:18:02,641
Yes.

323
00:18:02,717 --> 00:18:06,653
Hello, yes, I'm looking for a
gay nerd named Michael Scott.

324
00:18:06,721 --> 00:18:08,985
Who is this?
How did you get this number?

325
00:18:09,056 --> 00:18:11,251
Your mom, you gay nerd.

326
00:18:11,359 --> 00:18:16,023
Oh, my God. Packer. Packster.
Whacky Pack, how you doing?

327
00:18:16,097 --> 00:18:19,089
Hey, listen, did you get that
package I left for you?

328
00:18:20,334 --> 00:18:23,667
No. Did anybody see
a package here today?

329
00:18:24,372 --> 00:18:26,932
No. How big was it?
It was pretty big.

330
00:18:27,008 --> 00:18:28,339
Really?
Yeah!

331
00:18:28,409 --> 00:18:30,138
Did you see a big package?

332
00:18:30,244 --> 00:18:33,509
Where did you leave it? Look
in the middle of your office.

333
00:18:33,581 --> 00:18:36,948
Really? Guys, did you see
a big package in my office?

334
00:18:38,085 --> 00:18:39,677
You mean, the thing?

335
00:18:43,591 --> 00:18:45,320
Are you kidding me?

336
00:18:47,995 --> 00:18:49,963
Special delivery.
That was Packer!

337
00:18:50,031 --> 00:18:53,694
You are dead!
You are dead, my friend.

338
00:18:53,768 --> 00:18:56,134
That is... Oh, God!

339
00:18:56,671 --> 00:18:58,400
Of course it was you.

340
00:18:58,606 --> 00:19:00,665
Sit on the throne, Michael.

341
00:19:00,942 --> 00:19:02,910
Yeah! Yeah!

342
00:19:03,845 --> 00:19:06,040
Oh, my God! It was Packer!

343
00:19:06,180 --> 00:19:09,843
It takes an advanced sense of humor.
I don't expect everybody to understand.

344
00:19:09,917 --> 00:19:12,545
It was done out of love,
just like I thought.

345
00:19:12,620 --> 00:19:16,522
It's... God, these people are
so... These are good people.

346
00:19:17,458 --> 00:19:20,018
We have fun. We just have fun.

347
00:19:20,928 --> 00:19:23,726
Oh, I'm just so sorry
that I threw the thing out.

348
00:19:34,609 --> 00:19:36,975
You have
seven unheard messages.

349
00:19:38,112 --> 00:19:39,477
Hey, Jim, it's Pam.

350
00:19:39,547 --> 00:19:41,174
I keep looking up to
say something to you

351
00:19:41,249 --> 00:19:43,615
and then Michael's there
and it's horrible.

352
00:19:43,684 --> 00:19:46,152
Anyway, I'm bored. Come back.

353
00:19:46,554 --> 00:19:47,782
Hey, guess what?

354
00:19:47,855 --> 00:19:50,221
I moved my computer
so I can't see Michael's head.

355
00:19:50,291 --> 00:19:54,387
It's working. I think I can have a career
as a very specific type of decorator.

356
00:19:54,462 --> 00:19:57,556
Sudoku. Level, moderate.
Time, 18 minutes.

357
00:19:57,632 --> 00:19:59,293
Suck on that, Halpert.

358
00:20:00,268 --> 00:20:01,633
I'll transfer you.

359
00:20:02,069 --> 00:20:04,867
Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam.
Hold, please.

360
00:20:05,640 --> 00:20:07,665
Dunder Mifflin, this is...
Okay, sorry.

361
00:20:07,742 --> 00:20:09,733
Michael was standing at my
desk, and I needed to be busy

362
00:20:09,810 --> 00:20:12,176
or who knows what would have
happened. So, thank you.

363
00:20:12,246 --> 00:20:15,977
Hey, what's that word we made up for
when you have a thing stuck in your shoe?

364
00:20:16,050 --> 00:20:18,484
Anyway, I have a thing
stuck in my shoe.

365
00:20:18,886 --> 00:20:20,945
Hey, I have a chance
to sneak out of here early

366
00:20:21,022 --> 00:20:23,718
and I'm not messing this up.
So, I'll see you tomorrow.

367
00:20:23,791 --> 00:20:25,520
Calling from my cell phone.

368
00:20:25,592 --> 00:20:28,618
I don't know if you guys figured out
who did that to Michael's carpet yet,

369
00:20:28,696 --> 00:20:32,097
but I have a theory that involves
an inter-departmental conspiracy.

370
00:20:32,166 --> 00:20:34,726
Everybody in the office.
We need to talk.