1
00:00:00,017 --> 00:00:02,747
I'm an early bird
and I'm a night owl.

2
00:00:02,820 --> 00:00:05,550
So I'm wise and I have worms.

3
00:00:07,758 --> 00:00:09,225
Oh, breakfast.

4
00:00:09,293 --> 00:00:11,318
I got your sausage,
egg and cheese biscuit.

5
00:00:11,395 --> 00:00:14,364
Yummy, yummy, thank you, Ryan.

6
00:00:15,766 --> 00:00:19,224
What was the thing you needed
me to come in early for?

7
00:00:19,837 --> 00:00:20,826
Um...

8
00:00:22,006 --> 00:00:25,305
The sausage, egg and cheese
biscuit. But, thank you.

9
00:00:25,376 --> 00:00:30,313
And why don't you just take a
couple hours. Office is yours.

10
00:00:30,781 --> 00:00:35,343
Home Alone, Risky Business.
Take your pants off, run around.

11
00:00:36,787 --> 00:00:38,687
Whatever you want to do.

12
00:00:38,756 --> 00:00:40,917
I'm just going to take a nap
in my car till work starts.

13
00:00:40,992 --> 00:00:42,118
Okay.

14
00:00:44,028 --> 00:00:47,555
See? Healthier,
got to watch those carbs.

15
00:01:21,341 --> 00:01:25,876
Today, I, Michael Scott, am becoming
a homeowner, investing in real estate.

16
00:01:25,988 --> 00:01:27,421
Diversifying. Smart.

17
00:01:27,489 --> 00:01:29,582
Yes, it is. Yes, it is.

18
00:01:30,425 --> 00:01:33,019
It is very important
to own property.

19
00:01:33,328 --> 00:01:36,923
Back in olden days, they
would not even let you vote

20
00:01:36,999 --> 00:01:40,560
unless you owned property, and they'd
throw you in the stocks and humiliate you.

21
00:01:40,635 --> 00:01:41,761
And it worked.
Yes.

22
00:01:41,837 --> 00:01:43,998
They should bring the stocks
back, people would obey the law,

23
00:01:44,072 --> 00:01:45,061
there'd be less troublemakers.

24
00:01:45,140 --> 00:01:46,664
Maybe.

25
00:01:53,715 --> 00:01:56,650
Every so often,
Jim dies of boredom.

26
00:01:57,452 --> 00:02:00,819
I think today it was the
expense reports that did him in.

27
00:02:00,889 --> 00:02:04,052
And our deal is, that it's
up to me to revive him.

28
00:02:04,960 --> 00:02:07,053
You see Dwight's coffee mug?

29
00:02:07,129 --> 00:02:09,620
Sometimes when he's not here,
I try to throw stuff in it.

30
00:02:09,698 --> 00:02:10,926
No way.

31
00:02:12,868 --> 00:02:13,994
Let's do this.

32
00:02:19,775 --> 00:02:22,005
Here, try paperclips.

33
00:02:22,477 --> 00:02:25,378
Oh, wait, this message,
for Dwight.

34
00:02:25,447 --> 00:02:26,436
Perfect.

35
00:02:29,985 --> 00:02:30,974
You should go.

36
00:02:31,053 --> 00:02:32,714
Yes, yes. Final walk-through.

37
00:02:33,422 --> 00:02:34,582
Sign the papers at the condo.

38
00:02:34,656 --> 00:02:35,953
You have your lawyer there?

39
00:02:36,024 --> 00:02:37,013
I don't need one.

40
00:02:37,092 --> 00:02:38,081
Can I be your representative?

41
00:02:38,160 --> 00:02:39,684
I think I should be there.
I don't need representation.

42
00:02:39,761 --> 00:02:41,058
No, no.
No, I'm good. I can make sure

43
00:02:41,129 --> 00:02:42,790
things are up to code.
No, Dwight. Please.

44
00:02:42,864 --> 00:02:44,627
I'm always the guy
that you rely on at work.

45
00:02:44,699 --> 00:02:47,429
Well, this isn't about work.
This is closing on a condo.

46
00:02:47,502 --> 00:02:48,833
It's completely personal.

47
00:02:48,904 --> 00:02:51,099
So, you're taking
a personal day?

48
00:02:51,840 --> 00:02:54,331
Except that it's about
my living arrangement

49
00:02:54,409 --> 00:02:58,971
and as boss I need to have a living
arrangement in order to do work.

50
00:02:59,047 --> 00:03:01,208
Please. I'll make you proud.

51
00:03:02,284 --> 00:03:03,581
Okay, fine. Yes, you can come.

52
00:03:03,652 --> 00:03:04,812
Yes. As your representative?

53
00:03:04,886 --> 00:03:06,376
As my associate.
Same thing.

54
00:03:06,455 --> 00:03:07,786
No, it is not.

55
00:03:07,856 --> 00:03:11,155
I have been Michael's number
two guy for about five years

56
00:03:11,226 --> 00:03:12,887
and we make a great team.

57
00:03:12,961 --> 00:03:15,293
Why, we're like one of
those classic, famous teams.

58
00:03:15,397 --> 00:03:18,992
He's like Mozart
and I'm like Mozart's friend.

59
00:03:20,168 --> 00:03:23,103
No, I'm like Butch Cassidy,

60
00:03:23,171 --> 00:03:25,935
and Michael is like Mozart.

61
00:03:26,875 --> 00:03:30,743
You try and hurt Mozart, you're
gonna get a bullet in your head,

62
00:03:30,812 --> 00:03:32,837
courtesy of Butch Cassidy.

63
00:03:34,149 --> 00:03:36,344
Most honorable Pamela.

64
00:03:36,918 --> 00:03:39,284
Not offensive, because that's
the way they talk in movies.

65
00:03:39,354 --> 00:03:40,878
You headed out?
We are.

66
00:03:40,956 --> 00:03:43,186
Dwight and I
are going to the big thing.

67
00:03:43,325 --> 00:03:46,294
So, why don't you have everybody
work on their expense reports

68
00:03:46,361 --> 00:03:48,454
and I'd like them in by
the end of the day. Okay.

69
00:03:48,530 --> 00:03:49,622
Very good.
Have a great time.

70
00:03:49,698 --> 00:03:52,667
We will. Did you do the thing I
asked you to do about the magazines?

71
00:03:52,734 --> 00:03:54,725
Yeah, I changed them to
your new address. Good.

72
00:03:54,803 --> 00:03:57,271
The Small Business Man?
Yep.

73
00:03:58,039 --> 00:03:59,563
Maxim?

74
00:03:59,641 --> 00:04:01,336
American Way? CRACKED?

75
00:04:01,977 --> 00:04:05,310
Yes, I changed your CRACKED
magazine subscription.

76
00:04:06,448 --> 00:04:09,110
How about Fine Arts

77
00:04:10,652 --> 00:04:12,677
Aficionado Monthly?

78
00:04:14,489 --> 00:04:18,186
No? Okay. Well, could you get on
that, 'cause I don't just read CRACKED.

79
00:04:18,260 --> 00:04:19,318
Thank you.
Yeah.

80
00:04:19,394 --> 00:04:21,157
Okay. See you soon.

81
00:04:21,263 --> 00:04:23,493
What kind of shocks
you got on this baby?

82
00:04:23,565 --> 00:04:25,499
I don't know,
regular, normal ones.

83
00:04:26,234 --> 00:04:29,032
Nothing fancy, not my style.

84
00:04:30,105 --> 00:04:31,970
What are you doing?
I want to put the top down.

85
00:04:32,040 --> 00:04:35,203
What are you... No, Dwight.
It's 50 degrees outside, please.

86
00:04:35,277 --> 00:04:36,710
But then
no one can see us.

87
00:04:36,778 --> 00:04:39,144
I... Just...
Would you put it up?

88
00:04:39,981 --> 00:04:43,314
Okay, fine,
just leave it down. Whiner.

89
00:04:45,554 --> 00:04:48,079
Check it out. Terminator.

90
00:04:48,490 --> 00:04:51,653
I do not understand
what you spend your money on.

91
00:04:53,261 --> 00:04:57,459
Hey, Oscar. These new expense reports, do
we really have to go back to last quarter?

92
00:04:57,532 --> 00:05:00,160
Yeah, it's a terrible system,
I know.

93
00:05:01,870 --> 00:05:04,304
What does "2005 Season" mean?

94
00:05:05,540 --> 00:05:06,598
Wait a minute. What is this?

95
00:05:06,675 --> 00:05:07,937
It's a scoreboard.

96
00:05:08,009 --> 00:05:08,976
What?

97
00:05:09,044 --> 00:05:10,841
Kevin and I play
this paper football game

98
00:05:10,912 --> 00:05:12,140
when Michael's out.
Really?

99
00:05:12,214 --> 00:05:14,910
Or when we're bored. Oh, my God.

100
00:05:15,217 --> 00:05:17,310
Wait, this goes back
two years.

101
00:05:17,452 --> 00:05:18,441
We're bored a lot.

102
00:05:21,089 --> 00:05:22,113
Sweet.

103
00:05:22,190 --> 00:05:23,953
Yes, so close.

104
00:05:24,759 --> 00:05:28,695
I really love the "paper triangle
flicking and hitting things" game.

105
00:05:28,763 --> 00:05:30,355
Yeah. We call it
"Hate Ball. "

106
00:05:30,432 --> 00:05:31,456
Why?

107
00:05:31,533 --> 00:05:34,093
Because of how much
Angela hates it.

108
00:05:34,736 --> 00:05:36,636
Hey, do you guys have
any other games?

109
00:05:36,705 --> 00:05:40,402
Sometimes we play "who can put
the most M&M's in their mouth. "

110
00:05:40,475 --> 00:05:41,669
You play that.

111
00:05:41,743 --> 00:05:44,940
You should ask Toby
to teach you "Dunder Ball. "

112
00:05:47,148 --> 00:05:47,910
Home, sweet home.

113
00:05:49,050 --> 00:05:50,142
Which one's yours?

114
00:05:50,885 --> 00:05:55,185
Right there.
My sanctuary, my party-pad.

115
00:05:56,691 --> 00:06:01,526
Someday, I can just see my grandkids
learning how to walk out here.

116
00:06:02,564 --> 00:06:06,660
Hang a swing from this tree,
push them back...

117
00:06:08,603 --> 00:06:11,538
Wait. No,
it's this one right here.

118
00:06:12,474 --> 00:06:14,169
Home, sweet home.

119
00:06:18,146 --> 00:06:21,047
So that's what this sound is
all day.

120
00:06:21,182 --> 00:06:23,776
Michael, this is Bill. He's the
head of the condo association.

121
00:06:23,852 --> 00:06:27,515
Oh, hey, how are you? Nice to
meet you, Bill. Bill, Mr. Bill.

122
00:06:27,589 --> 00:06:30,786
Oh, no, Mr. Bill!

123
00:06:33,028 --> 00:06:35,758
SNL. When they
pull him apart?

124
00:06:37,232 --> 00:06:39,496
He would always get
rolled over by something.

125
00:06:40,001 --> 00:06:41,696
Nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you, too.

126
00:06:41,770 --> 00:06:43,499
This is smaller
than your old place.

127
00:06:43,571 --> 00:06:45,664
Yes, well, I'm buying it.
I'm not renting it.

128
00:06:46,274 --> 00:06:48,299
So, it's still an upgrade.

129
00:06:49,411 --> 00:06:53,108
He doesn't know anything about property
ownership. He's kind of an idiot.

130
00:06:53,748 --> 00:06:55,409
Actually,
I do own property.

131
00:06:56,017 --> 00:06:58,952
My grandfather left me
a 60 acre working beet farm.

132
00:06:59,020 --> 00:07:01,045
I run it with my cousin Moes.

133
00:07:01,122 --> 00:07:04,353
We sell beets to local
stores and restaurants.

134
00:07:05,427 --> 00:07:07,418
It's a nice little farm.

135
00:07:08,430 --> 00:07:10,955
Sometimes teenagers
use it for sex.

136
00:07:11,299 --> 00:07:12,664
Are we ready to sign
some papers?

137
00:07:12,734 --> 00:07:15,464
Actually, no,
we have a couple of questions.

138
00:07:15,603 --> 00:07:17,161
About the neighborhood.

139
00:07:17,238 --> 00:07:18,262
It's very safe.

140
00:07:18,340 --> 00:07:19,932
It's very clean.

141
00:07:20,041 --> 00:07:23,272
Also, it's very accepting
of all lifestyles.

142
00:07:25,380 --> 00:07:28,008
It's a very gay-friendly
neighborhood.

143
00:07:28,917 --> 00:07:30,782
Oh, good, that's good.

144
00:07:31,820 --> 00:07:34,311
It's good to be accommodating
of that.

145
00:07:34,756 --> 00:07:37,384
Let's go check out
the master bedroom.

146
00:07:37,792 --> 00:07:41,421
Stanley, I just played
Dunder Ball with Toby.

147
00:07:41,496 --> 00:07:42,656
What about you?
You got any games?

148
00:07:42,731 --> 00:07:43,755
Yeah, I got a game.

149
00:07:43,832 --> 00:07:46,960
It's called "work hard, so
my kids can go to college. "

150
00:07:47,635 --> 00:07:48,932
Fair enough.

151
00:07:50,105 --> 00:07:54,064
This, my friends,
is the master bedroom.

152
00:07:54,142 --> 00:07:58,169
Check out the cathedral ceilings.
Those are, like, 17 feet high.

153
00:07:58,246 --> 00:08:02,706
We have cable readiness right there.
I'm going to totally pimp this place out.

154
00:08:02,784 --> 00:08:05,184
I'm going to put
a surround sound system.

155
00:08:05,320 --> 00:08:07,880
I'm going to put a plasma
screen right against this wall.

156
00:08:07,956 --> 00:08:09,924
Oh, terrible idea. Here's where
I'm putting my bed, right here.

157
00:08:09,991 --> 00:08:12,186
No, no, no, no,
this is a shared wall.

158
00:08:12,260 --> 00:08:13,887
Neighbor throws his wife
into the wall,

159
00:08:13,962 --> 00:08:15,930
plasma screen hits the floor,
totally smashed.

160
00:08:15,997 --> 00:08:17,362
Well, then I will get
a warranty.

161
00:08:17,432 --> 00:08:18,456
Warranties don't cover it.

162
00:08:18,533 --> 00:08:19,557
Plus they're a rip-off.

163
00:08:19,634 --> 00:08:20,623
Well, then I won't get
a warranty.

164
00:08:20,769 --> 00:08:22,236
Wait. So, that's the
problem, it's solved. What?

165
00:08:22,303 --> 00:08:23,292
I don't hear you
practicing.

166
00:08:23,371 --> 00:08:25,635
Listen.
Can you hear that?

167
00:08:27,142 --> 00:08:28,370
Oh, man,

168
00:08:29,477 --> 00:08:31,536
these babies are thin.

169
00:08:43,425 --> 00:08:47,156
This scented candle, which I
found in the men's bathroom,

170
00:08:48,897 --> 00:08:52,060
represents the eternal

171
00:08:52,934 --> 00:08:55,698
burning of competition,

172
00:08:56,037 --> 00:08:57,163
or something.

173
00:08:57,238 --> 00:08:58,227
It smells like cookies.

174
00:08:58,773 --> 00:09:02,072
Yes, it does.
Yes, it does, my friend.

175
00:09:02,744 --> 00:09:07,408
Okay, we will be competing for
gold, silver and bronze yogurt lids.

176
00:09:07,882 --> 00:09:09,907
Now, the bronze
are really blue

177
00:09:09,984 --> 00:09:12,418
and they're also the backside
of the gold, so no flipping.

178
00:09:12,487 --> 00:09:14,250
Okay, honor system.

179
00:09:19,060 --> 00:09:20,322
I do play games.

180
00:09:20,595 --> 00:09:23,962
I sing and I dangle things
in front of my cats.

181
00:09:24,265 --> 00:09:27,063
I play lots of games,
just not at work.

182
00:09:27,602 --> 00:09:29,502
Let the games begin.

183
00:09:35,543 --> 00:09:37,807
And then I just need you
to sign here at this arrow.

184
00:09:37,879 --> 00:09:39,676
What kind of mortgage
did you get?

185
00:09:40,148 --> 00:09:41,137
Ten year.

186
00:09:41,916 --> 00:09:45,044
Well, 10 over 30.
So 30 year total.

187
00:09:45,286 --> 00:09:46,275
What? What?

188
00:09:46,888 --> 00:09:48,685
You said 10.

189
00:09:49,357 --> 00:09:53,885
Ten year fixed,
over 30, 30 year total.

190
00:09:53,962 --> 00:09:55,327
Oh, 30 years.

191
00:09:55,396 --> 00:09:56,863
Okay, okay, okay.

192
00:09:57,198 --> 00:09:59,962
Wow, you'll be paying
this off in your mid-70s.

193
00:10:00,034 --> 00:10:01,661
All right.

194
00:10:01,736 --> 00:10:03,863
Forget about retiring
when you're 65.

195
00:10:04,038 --> 00:10:05,938
Hey, I have an idea.
You know that extra bedroom?

196
00:10:06,007 --> 00:10:09,204
If the whole girlfriend thing never
happens, that's where the nurse can live.

197
00:10:09,277 --> 00:10:12,371
Okay, all right. Oh, boy.

198
00:10:12,514 --> 00:10:13,538
Okay, now, this is it.

199
00:10:13,615 --> 00:10:14,604
Whenever you're ready.

200
00:10:14,682 --> 00:10:15,774
Yeah.

201
00:10:16,684 --> 00:10:20,120
Oh, okay,
is that supposed to come off?

202
00:10:20,255 --> 00:10:21,244
Actually, yeah.

203
00:10:21,322 --> 00:10:22,311
Hey, look, cool,
carpenter ants.

204
00:10:23,358 --> 00:10:26,816
I'm going to take a little
breather for a second, excuse me.

205
00:10:26,961 --> 00:10:28,553
We'll be here
waiting for you.

206
00:10:28,630 --> 00:10:29,619
Oh, man.

207
00:10:30,064 --> 00:10:31,929
A 30-year mortgage
at Michael's age

208
00:10:32,000 --> 00:10:34,161
essentially means
that he's buying a coffin.

209
00:10:34,402 --> 00:10:38,168
Now, if I were buying my coffin,
I would get one with thicker walls

210
00:10:38,439 --> 00:10:40,771
so you couldn't hear
the other dead people.

211
00:10:44,479 --> 00:10:46,242
Whenever you're ready,
Michael.

212
00:10:48,016 --> 00:10:52,476
You have what is the national
sport of Icelandic paper companies.

213
00:10:53,454 --> 00:10:56,548
And I'm blanking on the name.
Could you help me out, Pam?

214
00:10:56,624 --> 00:11:00,526
Jim, they refer to it
as "Flonkerton. "

215
00:11:01,262 --> 00:11:03,992
In English, "box-of-paper
snowshoe racing. "

216
00:11:04,632 --> 00:11:07,226
Fair enough,
but I like Flonkerton.

217
00:11:07,635 --> 00:11:09,535
The thing about Jim is

218
00:11:10,438 --> 00:11:13,601
when he's excited about something,
like the Office Olympics,

219
00:11:13,675 --> 00:11:17,304
he gets really into it and
he does a really great job.

220
00:11:17,879 --> 00:11:20,746
But the problem with Jim
is that he works here,

221
00:11:20,815 --> 00:11:22,976
so that hardly ever happens.

222
00:11:23,585 --> 00:11:27,351
So, who will be challenging
Kevin in Flonkerton?

223
00:11:28,056 --> 00:11:29,546
Anyone?
I'll do it.

224
00:11:29,624 --> 00:11:30,989
Yes, Phyllis.

225
00:11:31,059 --> 00:11:32,321
Phyllis.

226
00:11:34,429 --> 00:11:38,695
Phyllis, if you just put your foot right
through here, right through the flonk.

227
00:11:38,866 --> 00:11:41,892
The ceilings are lower
than they were last week.

228
00:11:41,970 --> 00:11:43,028
That... I don't...

229
00:11:43,104 --> 00:11:44,332
What? I don't know if you showed me

230
00:11:44,405 --> 00:11:45,736
the same unit or not.

231
00:11:45,807 --> 00:11:47,502
Michael,
this is the unit you saw.

232
00:11:47,575 --> 00:11:50,373
And where are
all the hot people?

233
00:11:50,478 --> 00:11:53,606
I was told that there would be
all these attractive singles.

234
00:11:53,815 --> 00:11:55,214
Who told you that?
And as far as I can tell,

235
00:11:55,283 --> 00:11:57,217
I'm the best-looking
person here.

236
00:11:57,285 --> 00:11:59,014
There's a basic principle
in real estate,

237
00:11:59,087 --> 00:12:02,318
that you should never be the
best-looking person in the development.

238
00:12:02,523 --> 00:12:03,751
It's just sort of
common sense.

239
00:12:03,825 --> 00:12:08,524
Because if you are, then
you've no place to go but down.

240
00:12:09,297 --> 00:12:10,491
Is this a financial thing?

241
00:12:10,565 --> 00:12:14,057
If it's a financial thing, what some people
do is they rent out the third bedroom.

242
00:12:14,135 --> 00:12:15,329
That's an extra income for you. No, no.

243
00:12:15,403 --> 00:12:18,133
I'm not going to rent
the third bedroom.

244
00:12:18,206 --> 00:12:21,642
I want a price reduction
or I am a-walking.

245
00:12:22,243 --> 00:12:26,111
You will lose $7,000
if you walk away right now.

246
00:12:29,917 --> 00:12:33,114
I made the right decision.
I'm glad I signed.

247
00:12:33,354 --> 00:12:35,788
Look, I'm a homeowner. Right?

248
00:12:35,990 --> 00:12:38,982
Good to be a homeowner,
diversified. This is good.

249
00:12:39,427 --> 00:12:41,224
This is fun.
We're having fun.

250
00:12:41,295 --> 00:12:42,284
Totally having fun.

251
00:12:42,830 --> 00:12:45,355
Can you imagine those poor
saps stuck at the office today?

252
00:12:47,602 --> 00:12:48,899
Here we go. Here we go.

253
00:12:48,970 --> 00:12:50,164
Go, go, go!

254
00:12:50,238 --> 00:12:53,298
Pair of shoes.
Dig deep. Dig deep.

255
00:12:55,943 --> 00:12:58,002
It's Phyllis,
Phyllis by a nose.

256
00:12:58,146 --> 00:13:01,115
Gold medal in Flernenton.
Flonkerton.

257
00:13:01,182 --> 00:13:03,047
Thank you,
delegate from Iceland.

258
00:13:09,874 --> 00:13:13,002
Wow, okay,
no one else should even try.

259
00:13:13,078 --> 00:13:16,241
Gold medals. Give him medals.

260
00:13:17,249 --> 00:13:18,238
Wow.

261
00:13:20,686 --> 00:13:24,019
There's something else, Dwight,
I want to talk to you about.

262
00:13:24,089 --> 00:13:26,990
I have a surprise for you,
for helping me out today.

263
00:13:27,059 --> 00:13:28,151
Oh, you didn't have to...

264
00:13:28,227 --> 00:13:29,956
No, no, I insist,
I insist.

265
00:13:30,029 --> 00:13:32,361
Because you've really done
some great work, great work.

266
00:13:32,431 --> 00:13:35,059
And that is why
I'm going to let you

267
00:13:35,134 --> 00:13:38,729
move into my third bedroom
and pay me rent.

268
00:13:41,006 --> 00:13:42,234
Why did I do it?

269
00:13:42,308 --> 00:13:45,675
Because I believe in rewarding
people for their efforts.

270
00:13:46,479 --> 00:13:50,176
I rewarded Dwight
with the room

271
00:13:50,749 --> 00:13:53,274
and he is rewarding me back

272
00:13:53,586 --> 00:13:56,180
with $500 plus utilities.

273
00:13:56,722 --> 00:13:58,280
I don't even know
what to say.

274
00:13:58,357 --> 00:14:01,918
I'm thinking, lock you
into a four-year commitment.

275
00:14:01,994 --> 00:14:03,825
We'll go month-to-month
after that.

276
00:14:03,896 --> 00:14:07,764
Or until I start dating, have
a girlfriend and then, you're...

277
00:14:08,100 --> 00:14:09,727
You know,
you're gone. So...

278
00:14:09,802 --> 00:14:12,327
Question. Where can I put my terrarium?

279
00:14:14,607 --> 00:14:16,404
What the hell
is a terrarium?

280
00:14:16,509 --> 00:14:18,409
It's a fish tank
for snakes and lizards.

281
00:14:19,111 --> 00:14:20,874
Oh, so, an aquarium?

282
00:14:22,748 --> 00:14:26,650
That will not come
into this place, okay?

283
00:14:27,119 --> 00:14:28,416
Question.
Oh, my God.

284
00:14:28,487 --> 00:14:32,548
My grandparents left me
a large number of armoires.

285
00:14:32,625 --> 00:14:33,990
Are you sure
you don't want to play?

286
00:14:34,059 --> 00:14:35,048
I'm sure.

287
00:14:35,194 --> 00:14:37,890
Come on, Angela,
don't you have a game?

288
00:14:37,997 --> 00:14:39,828
I have one, yes.

289
00:14:39,899 --> 00:14:41,230
Well, let's play.
What is it?

290
00:14:41,767 --> 00:14:43,291
I call it "Pam-Pong. "

291
00:14:43,369 --> 00:14:45,394
I count how many times
Jim gets up from his desk

292
00:14:45,471 --> 00:14:47,803
and goes to reception
to talk to you.

293
00:14:48,474 --> 00:14:49,600
We're friends.

294
00:14:49,775 --> 00:14:50,764
Apparently.

295
00:14:51,544 --> 00:14:52,875
Very nicely done.

296
00:14:52,945 --> 00:14:57,109
Okay, so, I think that's H.O.R.
For Stanley and H.O. For Phyllis.

297
00:14:57,182 --> 00:14:58,809
Are you calling me a ho?

298
00:14:58,884 --> 00:14:59,873
Oh, my God.

299
00:15:00,653 --> 00:15:02,746
Phyllis coming alive,
I like it.

300
00:15:02,821 --> 00:15:06,120
Question. What about
car-pooling? Who pays for the gas?

301
00:15:06,191 --> 00:15:07,556
We take separate cars.

302
00:15:07,626 --> 00:15:09,594
Okay, question. Can sometimes I
drive your car and you drive mine?

303
00:15:09,662 --> 00:15:11,493
Why would we do that?
Just for fun.

304
00:15:11,564 --> 00:15:12,622
No.
Okay, question.

305
00:15:12,698 --> 00:15:14,097
Who's the primary
on the fire insurance?

306
00:15:15,401 --> 00:15:16,390
Game over.

307
00:15:17,570 --> 00:15:19,470
Offer revoked, Dwight.

308
00:15:20,039 --> 00:15:23,372
I'm sorry, but you reach out
and you try to be a nice guy

309
00:15:23,442 --> 00:15:26,275
and help out a friend
and this is what happens.

310
00:15:26,345 --> 00:15:28,108
This is what I get.

311
00:15:28,180 --> 00:15:31,411
Oh, God, I'm... Okay.

312
00:15:33,619 --> 00:15:35,177
Thank God.

313
00:15:35,254 --> 00:15:39,020
It was nice of him to offer, but
I live in a nine-bedroom farmhouse.

314
00:15:39,592 --> 00:15:43,426
I have my own crossbow range.
It's a perfect situation for me.

315
00:15:43,696 --> 00:15:45,596
Although, two bathrooms
would have been nice.

316
00:15:45,664 --> 00:15:47,097
We just have the one.

317
00:15:48,601 --> 00:15:50,159
And it's under the porch.

318
00:15:52,805 --> 00:15:54,932
Who had somebody
from Vance Refrigeration?

319
00:15:55,007 --> 00:15:56,634
I did.
Ryan Howard.

320
00:15:57,343 --> 00:15:59,368
Ryan, gold medal.

321
00:16:00,245 --> 00:16:02,509
I made something
for our closing ceremonies.

322
00:16:02,581 --> 00:16:06,779
What? Oh, my God. Where did
you have time to make that?

323
00:16:06,952 --> 00:16:11,048
Automatic voicemail.
All right, Pam, all right.

324
00:16:12,157 --> 00:16:13,522
Nice work.

325
00:16:23,002 --> 00:16:25,766
You know, you can always
refinance your mortgage.

326
00:16:25,838 --> 00:16:28,602
We had a 15-year on our beet
farm, we paid it off early.

327
00:16:28,674 --> 00:16:32,166
Yeah, well, you know what? Nobody
cares about your stupid beet farm.

328
00:16:32,244 --> 00:16:33,734
Beets are the worst.

329
00:16:33,812 --> 00:16:35,439
People love beets.
Nobody likes beets.

330
00:16:35,514 --> 00:16:36,503
Everyone loves beets.

331
00:16:36,582 --> 00:16:38,777
Nobody likes beets, Dwight.

332
00:16:39,118 --> 00:16:41,985
Why don't you grow something
that everybody does like?

333
00:16:42,054 --> 00:16:43,954
You should grow candy.

334
00:16:45,357 --> 00:16:47,917
I'd love a piece of candy
right now.

335
00:16:48,494 --> 00:16:49,893
Not a beet.

336
00:16:50,562 --> 00:16:52,826
Let's get this roof going. Stop it!

337
00:16:53,032 --> 00:16:54,932
Final lap, final lap.

338
00:16:55,000 --> 00:16:59,096
The time to beat is 1:15. Time
to beat is one minute, 15 seconds.

339
00:16:59,171 --> 00:17:00,195
Here they come!

340
00:17:00,272 --> 00:17:03,002
Go, go, go!

341
00:17:06,445 --> 00:17:07,571
Guys.

342
00:17:09,715 --> 00:17:11,478
What is going on?
Nothing.

343
00:17:12,151 --> 00:17:14,415
Guys, timer's still going.

344
00:17:15,054 --> 00:17:16,681
That's my stopwatch.

345
00:17:35,274 --> 00:17:37,105
Here you go. All done.

346
00:17:37,209 --> 00:17:38,198
Great.

347
00:17:38,610 --> 00:17:40,703
Yeah, I filled out
the expense reports.

348
00:17:40,913 --> 00:17:45,213
That took about five minutes and
then I closed two sales at lunchtime,

349
00:17:45,884 --> 00:17:49,251
so, about as productive
as any other day,

350
00:17:49,922 --> 00:17:51,446
if not more so.

351
00:17:58,964 --> 00:18:00,955
I figured I could
throw it away now

352
00:18:01,400 --> 00:18:05,063
or I could keep it for a couple
of months and then throw it away.

353
00:18:06,205 --> 00:18:08,036
I mean, it was really
nice of Pam to make them,

354
00:18:08,107 --> 00:18:09,631
but what am I going to do

355
00:18:09,708 --> 00:18:14,042
with a gold medal made of
paperclips and an old yogurt lid?

356
00:18:24,223 --> 00:18:25,212
Hey.

357
00:18:25,290 --> 00:18:26,279
I have 59 voicemails.

358
00:18:28,160 --> 00:18:32,153
Hey, can you ignore those and
do something for me, instead?

359
00:18:32,698 --> 00:18:34,165
Sure.

360
00:18:34,233 --> 00:18:36,793
Okay, today, 5:00,

361
00:18:37,836 --> 00:18:39,667
closing ceremonies.

362
00:18:39,738 --> 00:18:40,762
Really?

363
00:18:40,839 --> 00:18:42,238
Notify the athletes.

364
00:18:42,307 --> 00:18:43,535
Cool.

365
00:18:46,345 --> 00:18:47,607
Michael?

366
00:18:47,679 --> 00:18:48,941
Yeah. Jim. Slim Jim.

367
00:18:50,082 --> 00:18:52,414
What's going on?
Nothing.

368
00:18:52,484 --> 00:18:55,044
I just wanted to congratulate
you on your condo.

369
00:18:55,187 --> 00:18:57,621
Oh, thanks, thanks.
It's very cool.

370
00:18:57,723 --> 00:19:00,487
It's three bedroom, gay-friendly. Nice.

371
00:19:00,559 --> 00:19:01,617
You know.

372
00:19:01,693 --> 00:19:03,490
Hey, would you mind coming
out here for a second?

373
00:19:03,562 --> 00:19:05,359
I just have something for you.

374
00:19:05,430 --> 00:19:06,419
Really?

375
00:19:08,667 --> 00:19:10,066
What's this?

376
00:19:10,335 --> 00:19:13,202
These are the closing
ceremonies. Step up.

377
00:19:16,208 --> 00:19:17,470
Here, on the top one.

378
00:19:18,944 --> 00:19:22,710
Congratulations to Michael,
because he closed on his condo,

379
00:19:23,048 --> 00:19:24,572
so gold medal.

380
00:19:30,289 --> 00:19:33,486
I don't really know
what to say.

381
00:19:37,162 --> 00:19:40,154
I'm not one
for making speeches,

382
00:19:41,266 --> 00:19:43,860
but my heart is very full
at this moment.

383
00:19:46,839 --> 00:19:49,672
And for Dwight Schrute,
the silver medal.

384
00:19:51,610 --> 00:19:53,237
Get on up here, Dwight.

385
00:19:59,151 --> 00:20:00,277
Silver medal.

386
00:20:00,352 --> 00:20:01,717
Yeah, not as good
as gold.

387
00:20:09,027 --> 00:20:10,961
Why are you playing
the National Anthem?

388
00:20:12,364 --> 00:20:14,662
'Cause your condo's
in America.

389
00:20:21,807 --> 00:20:23,206
What the hell is that?

390
00:20:23,275 --> 00:20:24,765
Those are the doves.

391
00:20:53,639 --> 00:20:55,539
All right.