1 00:00:04,067 --> 00:00:05,967 [tapping on glass] 2 00:00:06,067 --> 00:00:08,000 Anyone watching thinking you know 3 00:00:08,100 --> 00:00:10,733 fuck all about knowing fuck all about 4 00:00:10,833 --> 00:00:12,167 needs to watch their back. 5 00:00:12,267 --> 00:00:13,333 Ow! 6 00:00:13,433 --> 00:00:15,500 So you've had your Labour reclassifying skunk, 7 00:00:15,600 --> 00:00:19,167 sending prices sky high-- literally, literally. 8 00:00:19,267 --> 00:00:21,767 Taking the grass from its own roots! 9 00:00:21,867 --> 00:00:25,167 Now you've got ConDemNation Liberals 10 00:00:25,267 --> 00:00:27,667 noshing Tories like altar boys picking dimps up. 11 00:00:27,767 --> 00:00:31,767 Have we had a national fucking stroke or what? 12 00:00:31,867 --> 00:00:35,633 Is revolution a word or was it never? 13 00:00:35,733 --> 00:00:39,567 Anybody watching needs to know we cope better than average 14 00:00:39,667 --> 00:00:41,167 with irony in Chatsworth. 15 00:00:41,267 --> 00:00:44,933 Well, for fuck's sake, we live in Manchester, 16 00:00:45,033 --> 00:00:47,800 and they charge us for water! 17 00:00:47,900 --> 00:00:52,500 I wandered lonely as a cloud, making mushrooms rarely found. 18 00:00:52,600 --> 00:00:55,633 This green and pleasant land in ancient times. 19 00:00:55,733 --> 00:00:56,900 Yak, yak, yak. 20 00:00:57,000 --> 00:00:59,033 [screaming] Yak, yak, yak. 21 00:00:59,133 --> 00:01:02,167 It's not theirs any more. 22 00:01:02,267 --> 00:01:04,067 This is our England now! 23 00:01:04,167 --> 00:01:07,600 [cheering] 24 00:01:07,700 --> 00:01:10,533 [theme music] 25 00:01:12,033 --> 00:01:14,467 MIMI (VOICEOVER): My family's everything to me. 26 00:01:14,567 --> 00:01:15,733 They are me. 27 00:01:15,833 --> 00:01:17,100 I made them. 28 00:01:17,200 --> 00:01:20,233 Made them strong and resilient. 29 00:01:20,333 --> 00:01:23,800 It's a mother's duty to prepare kids for the harsh realities 30 00:01:23,900 --> 00:01:24,833 of life. 31 00:01:24,933 --> 00:01:26,567 I mean, it's not easy, is it? 32 00:01:26,667 --> 00:01:29,433 Taught them from day one, it's family first. 33 00:01:29,533 --> 00:01:31,400 I'll stick this up your fucking ass. 34 00:01:31,500 --> 00:01:33,233 MIMI (VOICEOVER): To look out for each other, 35 00:01:33,333 --> 00:01:36,900 watch each other's backs, because as we all know, 36 00:01:37,000 --> 00:01:38,233 blood is thicker than water. 37 00:01:38,333 --> 00:01:39,733 I doubt you'd find it. 38 00:01:39,833 --> 00:01:41,300 You missed every other fucking hole. 39 00:01:41,400 --> 00:01:42,667 MIMI (VOICEOVER): And you know what? 40 00:01:42,767 --> 00:01:44,567 They're a credit to me. 41 00:01:44,667 --> 00:01:45,800 Shut up, Micky! 42 00:01:45,900 --> 00:01:46,733 Mum! 43 00:01:46,833 --> 00:01:47,733 [music playing] 44 00:01:47,833 --> 00:01:50,567 Somebody you just love to burn. 45 00:01:50,667 --> 00:01:52,100 Fuck's sake! 46 00:01:52,200 --> 00:01:54,000 You shouldn't have got in the way of that, should ya? 47 00:01:54,100 --> 00:01:55,933 Shit, soft arse. 48 00:01:56,033 --> 00:01:58,200 MIMI (VOICEOVER): Family is everything. 49 00:01:58,300 --> 00:02:02,367 Family's the be all and end all, the start and the finish. 50 00:02:02,467 --> 00:02:05,767 Family is king. 51 00:02:05,867 --> 00:02:10,600 Even when the king's long since departed, family lives on. 52 00:02:10,700 --> 00:02:12,633 And the hard fist that keeps you in line. 53 00:02:12,733 --> 00:02:13,533 [music playing] 54 00:02:13,633 --> 00:02:14,767 It's a family affair. 55 00:02:19,467 --> 00:02:20,833 I'd have to leave it parked around there. 56 00:02:20,933 --> 00:02:22,867 You're going to have to sort this out with the brewery. 57 00:02:22,967 --> 00:02:24,633 I ain't got that kind of cash on me. 58 00:02:24,733 --> 00:02:26,267 It's been fine to park around here for years. 59 00:02:26,367 --> 00:02:27,767 Who the fuck's clamped it? 60 00:02:27,867 --> 00:02:29,167 Comes to something when you can't 61 00:02:29,267 --> 00:02:30,700 get a tit roll without your vehicle being impounded. 62 00:02:30,800 --> 00:02:34,233 [sighing] 63 00:02:39,067 --> 00:02:40,167 That wasn't tackling. 64 00:02:40,267 --> 00:02:41,100 You were trying to put me in hospital. 65 00:02:41,200 --> 00:02:42,400 You saw it, Mark. 66 00:02:42,500 --> 00:02:43,967 Went in heavier than a fucking prop forward. 67 00:02:44,067 --> 00:02:45,767 It's footy, mate. Not rugby. 68 00:02:45,867 --> 00:02:47,633 Stop whining, you losers! 69 00:02:47,733 --> 00:02:48,800 Ooh! 70 00:02:48,900 --> 00:02:50,033 Defend yourself. 71 00:02:50,133 --> 00:02:51,600 Should have given the bastard a slap. 72 00:02:51,700 --> 00:02:52,533 It's a game. 73 00:02:52,633 --> 00:02:53,833 A game with rules. 74 00:02:53,933 --> 00:02:55,167 Forget them and you're fucked. 75 00:02:55,267 --> 00:02:56,133 We're all fucked. 76 00:02:56,233 --> 00:02:57,400 Get real, will you, Jackson? 77 00:02:57,500 --> 00:02:59,267 The world's full of dirty little no marks 78 00:02:59,367 --> 00:03:01,600 like him just waiting to take what's yours. 79 00:03:01,700 --> 00:03:03,000 Don't get me wrong. 80 00:03:03,100 --> 00:03:04,800 You try it again in a replay, and I'll have your-- 81 00:03:04,900 --> 00:03:06,100 You reckon? 82 00:03:06,200 --> 00:03:07,267 Anyone can make a mistake, but do it again, 83 00:03:07,367 --> 00:03:08,633 and I'll eat you alive. 84 00:03:08,733 --> 00:03:10,533 - Oooh! - That's like it. 85 00:03:10,633 --> 00:03:11,433 You know it. 86 00:03:11,533 --> 00:03:12,700 Quick scoop before you head off? 87 00:03:12,800 --> 00:03:13,633 Too right. 88 00:03:13,733 --> 00:03:14,800 Ches! 89 00:03:14,900 --> 00:03:15,733 Not me. 90 00:03:15,833 --> 00:03:17,767 I've got an early start. 91 00:03:17,867 --> 00:03:21,567 Jackson, better luck next time, lad. 92 00:03:21,667 --> 00:03:22,567 Surprised you asked him. 93 00:03:22,667 --> 00:03:23,400 Why? 94 00:03:23,500 --> 00:03:25,533 His lot don't drink, do they? 95 00:03:25,633 --> 00:03:29,100 [music playing] 96 00:03:42,400 --> 00:03:43,567 At least there's one name. 97 00:03:43,667 --> 00:03:46,000 I think it's one name. 98 00:03:46,100 --> 00:03:48,967 Conchita Maria Teresa Bonita Ricardo Martinez. 99 00:03:49,067 --> 00:03:50,133 No, that's me. 100 00:03:50,233 --> 00:03:51,800 Just wanted to get the ball rolling. 101 00:03:51,900 --> 00:03:54,333 I thought you were doing a course on wiping babies' asses. 102 00:03:54,433 --> 00:03:59,933 I'm doing drama, contemporary dance, and needlecraft now. 103 00:04:00,033 --> 00:04:01,067 Needlecraft? 104 00:04:01,167 --> 00:04:03,167 We've got to put a variety show on. 105 00:04:03,267 --> 00:04:05,233 The best act gets to perform in front of Royalty. 106 00:04:05,333 --> 00:04:07,967 So long as it's not fucking Edward or that ginger one. 107 00:04:08,067 --> 00:04:09,233 Or Charles or Willy. 108 00:04:09,333 --> 00:04:10,633 The one with the teeth and the horses. 109 00:04:10,733 --> 00:04:12,867 Or the old Greek one or the other ginger one. 110 00:04:12,967 --> 00:04:14,233 I just want to win it. 111 00:04:14,333 --> 00:04:16,133 All that lot think I'm a right retard. 112 00:04:16,233 --> 00:04:17,667 Did you know the student's union only 113 00:04:17,767 --> 00:04:19,800 thought I was there as part of the mental health awareness 114 00:04:19,900 --> 00:04:20,900 week? 115 00:04:21,000 --> 00:04:21,867 Am I the only one serving here? 116 00:04:21,967 --> 00:04:23,600 - Yeah! - Cheeky fuckers. 117 00:04:23,700 --> 00:04:25,833 You've got showbiz running through your veins. 118 00:04:25,933 --> 00:04:26,900 He's got a lot of stuff running 119 00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:28,033 through his veins, Mimi. 120 00:04:28,133 --> 00:04:29,600 I don't know if any of it's showbiz. 121 00:04:29,700 --> 00:04:32,600 My brother, his Uncle Robert, toured the clubs as a magician 122 00:04:32,700 --> 00:04:33,933 and worked the liners, too. 123 00:04:34,033 --> 00:04:35,200 Uncle Bobby, yeah. 124 00:04:35,300 --> 00:04:36,600 Robert. 125 00:04:36,700 --> 00:04:38,400 I remember him saying cruising was his life in the magic ring 126 00:04:38,500 --> 00:04:39,333 and all that. 127 00:04:39,433 --> 00:04:40,233 Circle. 128 00:04:40,333 --> 00:04:41,667 How come I've never met him? 129 00:04:41,767 --> 00:04:42,833 I got married and moved away. 130 00:04:42,933 --> 00:04:45,233 And he had his career, showbiz pals. 131 00:04:45,333 --> 00:04:46,467 I loved the bones of him. 132 00:04:46,567 --> 00:04:48,967 But we moved in different worlds. 133 00:04:49,067 --> 00:04:51,067 He was globetrotting, and I was rearing a family. 134 00:04:51,167 --> 00:04:52,167 You should get in touch. 135 00:04:52,267 --> 00:04:55,667 You think I haven't tried? 136 00:04:55,767 --> 00:04:57,467 With ya now, love. 137 00:04:57,567 --> 00:04:59,567 [laughing] 138 00:04:59,667 --> 00:05:00,900 Crack. 139 00:05:01,000 --> 00:05:04,333 [music playing] 140 00:05:06,200 --> 00:05:08,233 Jesus, what charity is it this time? 141 00:05:12,167 --> 00:05:13,133 Are you serious? 142 00:05:13,233 --> 00:05:14,933 - BAP. - Tit. 143 00:05:15,033 --> 00:05:15,867 BAP. 144 00:05:15,967 --> 00:05:16,933 Tit. 145 00:05:17,033 --> 00:05:19,667 BAP! 146 00:05:19,767 --> 00:05:23,367 B-A-P. British Alliance Party. 147 00:05:23,467 --> 00:05:25,100 Raffle tickets for their social club. 148 00:05:25,200 --> 00:05:26,300 Wouldn't have thought you'd have fit 149 00:05:26,400 --> 00:05:27,533 in their demograph, Jackson. 150 00:05:27,633 --> 00:05:28,933 And why would that be? 151 00:05:29,033 --> 00:05:33,867 On account of you being black, black, black, black, and black. 152 00:05:33,967 --> 00:05:35,367 That's not what they're about. 153 00:05:35,467 --> 00:05:38,600 Compulsory repatriation, a complete ban on immigration, 154 00:05:38,700 --> 00:05:40,800 and laws discriminating against gays and women. 155 00:05:40,900 --> 00:05:42,067 What else could they be about? 156 00:05:42,167 --> 00:05:43,267 Whatever. 157 00:05:43,367 --> 00:05:44,767 See ya! 158 00:05:44,867 --> 00:05:48,267 [music playing] 159 00:05:49,767 --> 00:05:51,133 Jamie's doing his nut. 160 00:05:51,233 --> 00:05:53,167 Shouldn't have clamped him. - Bastards! 161 00:05:53,267 --> 00:05:55,367 Uh, we shouldn't have clamped him, Micky. 162 00:05:55,467 --> 00:05:58,533 That's me, you, and Manchester Clamping Solutions. 163 00:05:58,633 --> 00:05:59,667 He won't pay up, will he? 164 00:05:59,767 --> 00:06:01,133 You know what he's like. 165 00:06:01,233 --> 00:06:02,300 Who gives a shit? 166 00:06:02,400 --> 00:06:03,033 Well, I do. 167 00:06:03,133 --> 00:06:04,100 I put money into it. 168 00:06:04,200 --> 00:06:05,000 I've got a say. 169 00:06:05,100 --> 00:06:05,967 No, you haven't! 170 00:06:06,067 --> 00:06:07,267 You're a silent partner. 171 00:06:07,367 --> 00:06:09,067 Now shut the fuck up! 172 00:06:09,167 --> 00:06:11,100 It'll kick off. 173 00:06:11,200 --> 00:06:12,033 Fuck's sake! 174 00:06:12,133 --> 00:06:14,133 Stop whining, will ya! 175 00:06:14,233 --> 00:06:15,233 I'll take it off, all right? 176 00:06:15,333 --> 00:06:16,267 Why do you and Jamie always have 177 00:06:16,367 --> 00:06:18,300 to have a pop at each other? 178 00:06:18,400 --> 00:06:19,800 Why can't you just get on? 179 00:06:19,900 --> 00:06:21,167 You're brothers, for fuck's sake. 180 00:06:21,267 --> 00:06:23,367 Nothing more than a biological accident, Micky. 181 00:06:23,467 --> 00:06:24,733 If I hadn't been the fast swimmer, 182 00:06:24,833 --> 00:06:27,067 or Dad decided to have one off the wrist instead 183 00:06:27,167 --> 00:06:28,800 of impregnating Mum, we wouldn't even 184 00:06:28,900 --> 00:06:29,967 be having this conversation. 185 00:06:30,067 --> 00:06:32,067 Look, Jamie is a cunt. 186 00:06:32,167 --> 00:06:34,633 A prize cunt who thinks and cares about 187 00:06:34,733 --> 00:06:36,333 no one other than himself. 188 00:06:36,433 --> 00:06:37,500 Believe. 189 00:06:37,600 --> 00:06:40,000 Fuck's sake! 190 00:06:40,100 --> 00:06:43,700 [music playing] 191 00:06:46,033 --> 00:06:47,000 Fucking amateurs. 192 00:06:47,100 --> 00:06:48,367 Won't they charge you more? 193 00:06:48,467 --> 00:06:49,867 Look, you'll be destroying their property, 194 00:06:49,967 --> 00:06:50,900 and them clamps aren't cheap. 195 00:06:51,000 --> 00:06:51,933 It's a scam! 196 00:06:52,033 --> 00:06:53,933 You get yourself a phony license, 197 00:06:54,033 --> 00:06:55,700 stick a few photocopied signs up. 198 00:06:55,800 --> 00:06:57,267 You're wrong there, Jamie. 199 00:06:57,367 --> 00:06:59,567 No, they're subcontracted and endorsed by Manchester Clamping 200 00:06:59,667 --> 00:07:02,200 Solutions, and they're operating according to local bylaws 201 00:07:02,300 --> 00:07:03,733 and governmental legislations. 202 00:07:03,833 --> 00:07:05,567 How the fuck would you know? 203 00:07:05,667 --> 00:07:06,933 I heard it somewhere. 204 00:07:07,033 --> 00:07:08,200 Look, why don't you go back in the pub? 205 00:07:08,300 --> 00:07:09,267 I'll handle this. 206 00:07:09,367 --> 00:07:10,700 You? 207 00:07:10,800 --> 00:07:12,533 You don't want to mess with these guys, Jamie. 208 00:07:12,633 --> 00:07:13,467 I've seen them. 209 00:07:13,567 --> 00:07:15,467 You've seen them? 210 00:07:15,567 --> 00:07:16,567 What do they look like? 211 00:07:16,667 --> 00:07:18,400 About that big. 212 00:07:18,500 --> 00:07:20,367 Chinese Triads. 213 00:07:20,467 --> 00:07:21,233 Hard fuckers. 214 00:07:21,333 --> 00:07:24,967 Micky, do me a favor, will ya? 215 00:07:25,067 --> 00:07:26,900 Look, this is too dangerous! 216 00:07:27,000 --> 00:07:28,467 Look, we can't afford to lose you. 217 00:07:28,567 --> 00:07:32,300 I'll handle it. You go back in there. 218 00:07:32,400 --> 00:07:33,933 You'll make Connor an orphan. 219 00:07:34,033 --> 00:07:36,500 The poor kid will grow up not knowing his dad. 220 00:07:36,600 --> 00:07:38,600 I mean, I'll talk about you, obviously, 221 00:07:38,700 --> 00:07:40,033 and keep your memory alive. 222 00:07:40,133 --> 00:07:43,633 Micky, will you fuck off! 223 00:07:43,733 --> 00:07:44,567 Oi! 224 00:07:44,667 --> 00:07:45,600 The fuck you doing? 225 00:07:45,700 --> 00:07:46,967 Oh, it's all right. 226 00:07:47,067 --> 00:07:48,067 I'm on it. 227 00:07:48,167 --> 00:07:50,567 That's my property. 228 00:07:50,667 --> 00:07:51,800 You? 229 00:07:51,900 --> 00:07:54,100 I thought you said it belonged to a Chinese dwarf. 230 00:07:54,200 --> 00:07:55,200 No, it's my new business. 231 00:07:55,300 --> 00:07:56,400 Look, it's all sorted now, innit? 232 00:07:56,500 --> 00:07:57,167 No harm done. 233 00:07:57,267 --> 00:07:58,667 You parked illegally. 234 00:07:58,767 --> 00:07:59,900 You've damaged a clamp. 235 00:08:00,000 --> 00:08:01,367 That'll be 70 quid. 236 00:08:01,467 --> 00:08:02,500 In your dreams. 237 00:08:02,600 --> 00:08:04,267 Pay the fine, or I'll just keep putting it on. 238 00:08:04,367 --> 00:08:05,767 And I'll just keep cutting it off. 239 00:08:05,867 --> 00:08:06,867 I'll pay it. 240 00:08:06,967 --> 00:08:10,200 You keep your fucking nose out. 241 00:08:10,300 --> 00:08:12,900 I won't tell you again! 242 00:08:13,000 --> 00:08:14,233 Who the fuck do you think you are? 243 00:08:14,333 --> 00:08:14,867 What? 244 00:08:14,967 --> 00:08:15,800 He's your brother. 245 00:08:15,900 --> 00:08:16,933 You know, we're brothers. 246 00:08:17,033 --> 00:08:18,033 The guy who's about to reach down 247 00:08:18,133 --> 00:08:19,333 and rip out your fucking lungs! 248 00:08:19,433 --> 00:08:20,533 That's enough! 249 00:08:20,633 --> 00:08:22,500 [grunting] 250 00:08:23,567 --> 00:08:27,367 Oh, for fuck's sake! 251 00:08:27,467 --> 00:08:29,700 [chatter] 252 00:08:34,133 --> 00:08:35,800 Guess who won the raffle? 253 00:08:35,900 --> 00:08:38,433 Fix! 254 00:08:38,533 --> 00:08:39,567 What the fuck? 255 00:08:39,667 --> 00:08:40,500 [laughing] 256 00:08:40,600 --> 00:08:41,767 Really? 257 00:08:41,867 --> 00:08:43,033 What have you won? 258 00:08:43,133 --> 00:08:47,033 Dinner at the Meat and Two Veg restaurant. 259 00:08:47,133 --> 00:08:48,033 In Burnley? 260 00:08:48,133 --> 00:08:49,367 Fucking Burnley? 261 00:08:49,467 --> 00:08:50,367 Wow. 262 00:08:50,467 --> 00:08:51,900 All homegrown produce, British beef. 263 00:08:52,000 --> 00:08:54,600 Ever heard of Stockholm symptom, Jackson? 264 00:08:54,700 --> 00:08:55,800 They're not brainwashing me. 265 00:08:55,900 --> 00:08:57,300 It's sport, not politics. 266 00:08:57,400 --> 00:08:59,367 They're decent people, once you get to know them. 267 00:08:59,467 --> 00:09:01,333 They used to say the same thing about Mengele. 268 00:09:01,433 --> 00:09:03,967 He's not too bad once you scratch the surface. 269 00:09:04,067 --> 00:09:05,700 Get over that whole genocide thing! 270 00:09:05,800 --> 00:09:09,000 They just want us to look after ourselves. 271 00:09:09,100 --> 00:09:10,400 Brits. 272 00:09:10,500 --> 00:09:13,067 The state the economy is in, charity begins at home. 273 00:09:13,167 --> 00:09:14,933 We need to take care of our own before we 274 00:09:15,033 --> 00:09:16,033 can help anybody else. 275 00:09:18,933 --> 00:09:20,333 You'll be invading Poland next. 276 00:09:24,800 --> 00:09:27,500 What are you up to? 277 00:09:27,600 --> 00:09:30,033 They're obliged by law to accept membership 278 00:09:30,133 --> 00:09:31,267 from all walks of life-- 279 00:09:31,367 --> 00:09:33,167 black, Asian, gay, whatever. 280 00:09:33,267 --> 00:09:34,667 And I want to see if they will. 281 00:09:34,767 --> 00:09:36,533 I want to see if they genuinely accept me, 282 00:09:36,633 --> 00:09:38,167 or they're just paying lip service. 283 00:09:38,267 --> 00:09:39,467 And what if they are? 284 00:09:39,567 --> 00:09:41,300 I expose the two-faced fascist bastards for who 285 00:09:41,400 --> 00:09:43,600 they are and close them down. 286 00:09:43,700 --> 00:09:46,100 I thought we were going to have to call an ambulance. 287 00:09:46,200 --> 00:09:47,200 I'm all right. 288 00:09:47,300 --> 00:09:48,100 Do you want help getting there? 289 00:09:48,200 --> 00:09:49,333 I bit my tongue. 290 00:09:49,433 --> 00:09:50,633 Did you do this to your own? 291 00:09:50,733 --> 00:09:52,267 None of this would have happened if Shane hadn't 292 00:09:52,367 --> 00:09:53,567 clamped the delivery van. 293 00:09:53,667 --> 00:09:54,700 Jamie should have paid up. 294 00:09:54,800 --> 00:09:57,133 And what's it got to do with you, little Hitler? 295 00:09:57,233 --> 00:09:58,267 We're business partners. 296 00:09:58,367 --> 00:10:00,000 Fuck business partners. 297 00:10:00,100 --> 00:10:01,767 Your brother's sitting here concussed, 298 00:10:01,867 --> 00:10:04,200 and you're still tearing at each other. 299 00:10:04,300 --> 00:10:07,967 What's it going to take for you to grow the fuck up? 300 00:10:08,067 --> 00:10:10,233 I'm ashamed to call you family. 301 00:10:10,333 --> 00:10:12,167 BOBBI: I recognize those dulcet tones. 302 00:10:19,367 --> 00:10:20,900 - Robert? - You came. 303 00:10:21,000 --> 00:10:21,933 Uncle Robert! 304 00:10:22,033 --> 00:10:25,033 Bobbi, with an I, like Liza-- 305 00:10:25,133 --> 00:10:26,033 Minnelli, that is. 306 00:10:26,133 --> 00:10:27,133 Not Tarbuck. 307 00:10:29,300 --> 00:10:30,500 No kiss for your little sis? 308 00:10:38,100 --> 00:10:39,100 Fuck me! 309 00:10:42,500 --> 00:10:44,133 BOBBI: Sorry to hear about you and Paddy. 310 00:10:44,233 --> 00:10:45,833 You hated the fucking sight of him. 311 00:10:45,933 --> 00:10:47,133 Well, true enough. 312 00:10:47,233 --> 00:10:49,133 Micky traced me down via my agent, 313 00:10:49,233 --> 00:10:53,667 said you'd been looking for me, said you'd been missing me. 314 00:10:53,767 --> 00:10:55,467 I missed you, too, you know. 315 00:10:55,567 --> 00:10:58,400 It's just one minute you were seeing that gobshite. 316 00:10:58,500 --> 00:11:00,400 Next minute you were up the duff, married. 317 00:11:00,500 --> 00:11:02,600 Then at the wrong end of the M62. 318 00:11:02,700 --> 00:11:03,600 Whirlwind romance. 319 00:11:03,700 --> 00:11:05,533 Shotgun wedding. 320 00:11:05,633 --> 00:11:07,667 You know, I did try and keep in touch. 321 00:11:07,767 --> 00:11:09,633 I did a few gigs here years back. 322 00:11:09,733 --> 00:11:11,667 Gave you a knock, but you were never in. 323 00:11:11,767 --> 00:11:13,367 Meems! 324 00:11:13,467 --> 00:11:14,333 [knocking] 325 00:11:14,433 --> 00:11:15,267 Meems? 326 00:11:17,833 --> 00:11:19,600 Did write. 327 00:11:19,700 --> 00:11:22,067 [music playing] 328 00:11:23,233 --> 00:11:24,767 I just thought you were dropping a hint. 329 00:11:24,867 --> 00:11:25,800 So it's OK. 330 00:11:25,900 --> 00:11:27,333 You're me little baby brother. 331 00:11:27,433 --> 00:11:29,700 If only we had mobiles in them days, eh? 332 00:11:29,800 --> 00:11:30,833 Emails? 333 00:11:30,933 --> 00:11:32,467 Oh, well, we're here now, aren't we? 334 00:11:32,567 --> 00:11:35,600 Hepburn sisters back together again at last. 335 00:11:35,700 --> 00:11:37,033 I'll be Audrey. 336 00:11:37,133 --> 00:11:38,900 You can be the one with a voice like a man. 337 00:11:39,000 --> 00:11:40,167 [chuckling] 338 00:11:40,267 --> 00:11:41,567 Robert, listen, I hate to say this-- 339 00:11:41,667 --> 00:11:42,567 Bobbi! 340 00:11:42,667 --> 00:11:45,000 Nobody's called me Robert in an age. 341 00:11:45,100 --> 00:11:46,833 Bobbi! - Bob. 342 00:11:46,933 --> 00:11:48,133 Bee! 343 00:11:48,233 --> 00:11:51,267 Bobbi, it might be an idea to tone 344 00:11:51,367 --> 00:11:54,867 down the whole, erm, showbiz angle while you're here. 345 00:11:54,967 --> 00:11:57,067 Just cut the camp shit. 346 00:11:57,167 --> 00:11:58,933 People round here like the women to be 347 00:11:59,033 --> 00:12:00,767 women and the men to be men. 348 00:12:00,867 --> 00:12:02,067 Oh, don't we all? 349 00:12:02,167 --> 00:12:03,300 No, I hear you. 350 00:12:03,400 --> 00:12:04,700 I hear you. 351 00:12:04,800 --> 00:12:05,933 Good. 352 00:12:06,033 --> 00:12:07,533 Suitcase is at ours. 353 00:12:07,633 --> 00:12:09,567 No brother of mine's staying in a scabby B 354 00:12:09,667 --> 00:12:11,867 and B. Micky's on the couch. 355 00:12:11,967 --> 00:12:13,133 You'll have his room. 356 00:12:13,233 --> 00:12:14,267 Did you change the sheets? 357 00:12:14,367 --> 00:12:15,100 Yeah. 358 00:12:15,200 --> 00:12:17,667 Get rid of the wanky hankies? 359 00:12:17,767 --> 00:12:18,933 Thanks very much, Micky love. 360 00:12:19,033 --> 00:12:19,867 It's very kind of you. 361 00:12:19,967 --> 00:12:21,533 You're family. 362 00:12:21,633 --> 00:12:25,733 The only other uncles I've got are either dead or in-- 363 00:12:25,833 --> 00:12:26,667 Argentina. 364 00:12:29,233 --> 00:12:30,400 I need to get back to work. 365 00:12:30,500 --> 00:12:32,233 And how about I take my favorite nephew 366 00:12:32,333 --> 00:12:33,700 for a proper drink? 367 00:12:33,800 --> 00:12:34,633 A real drink. 368 00:12:34,733 --> 00:12:35,600 Come on. 369 00:12:39,133 --> 00:12:40,800 Two days max, and he's out of here. 370 00:12:40,900 --> 00:12:41,700 Get that! 371 00:12:48,433 --> 00:12:50,700 Shane. 372 00:12:50,800 --> 00:12:52,433 You kept that fucking quiet. 373 00:12:52,533 --> 00:12:54,033 Yeah, when I was a kid, I always thought 374 00:12:54,133 --> 00:12:56,533 he was a magician, not the fucking assistant. 375 00:12:56,633 --> 00:12:57,900 What's the big deal? 376 00:12:58,000 --> 00:12:59,200 He looks like a woman. 377 00:12:59,300 --> 00:13:01,233 Hey, Mum's been singing his praises for years. 378 00:13:01,333 --> 00:13:03,100 Why wouldn't she mention he was a tranny? 379 00:13:03,200 --> 00:13:05,067 Because it obviously doesn't matter to her. 380 00:13:05,167 --> 00:13:07,300 They were dead happy to see each other. 381 00:13:07,400 --> 00:13:09,833 He's the only family she's got besides you lot. 382 00:13:09,933 --> 00:13:12,033 Don't go spoiling it! 383 00:13:12,133 --> 00:13:14,400 The fuck is that supposed to be? 384 00:13:14,500 --> 00:13:15,500 A transvestite. 385 00:13:15,600 --> 00:13:19,200 A man who likes to eat, drink, and be merry. 386 00:13:19,300 --> 00:13:22,533 It takes balls to be a tranny, and a penis. 387 00:13:22,633 --> 00:13:23,633 I should know. 388 00:13:23,733 --> 00:13:25,667 MAN: Hey, love, what big hands you've got! 389 00:13:25,767 --> 00:13:26,767 What big feet you've got. 390 00:13:26,867 --> 00:13:27,967 WOMAN: What a big cock you've got! 391 00:13:28,067 --> 00:13:29,767 [laughter] 392 00:13:31,033 --> 00:13:33,433 Have I got cunt written on my forehead? 393 00:13:33,533 --> 00:13:34,267 No, Mimi. 394 00:13:34,367 --> 00:13:35,900 Then don't treat me like one. 395 00:13:36,000 --> 00:13:37,767 And the same goes for my sis-- 396 00:13:37,867 --> 00:13:38,667 brother. 397 00:13:43,000 --> 00:13:43,800 Spread the word! 398 00:13:43,900 --> 00:13:45,467 [dull slapping] 399 00:13:45,567 --> 00:13:46,367 Cheers. 400 00:13:52,300 --> 00:13:53,433 That's eight pound please, guys. 401 00:13:53,533 --> 00:13:55,367 Third cup replay we've lost on the trot. 402 00:13:55,467 --> 00:13:57,267 We need to up the training regime. 403 00:13:57,367 --> 00:13:59,600 A few less lagers and a few more 5K runs. 404 00:13:59,700 --> 00:14:01,267 10K runs. 405 00:14:01,367 --> 00:14:02,833 We'll put a program together. 406 00:14:02,933 --> 00:14:04,467 There's still time to finish the season with a bit of dignity. 407 00:14:04,567 --> 00:14:06,600 That's what I like, a bit of positivity. 408 00:14:06,700 --> 00:14:07,700 A bit of delusion. 409 00:14:07,800 --> 00:14:10,367 There you go. 410 00:14:10,467 --> 00:14:14,700 Hey, lads, what do blondes say after sex? 411 00:14:14,800 --> 00:14:16,600 Thanks, guys. 412 00:14:16,700 --> 00:14:18,567 Lads, we're off for a bit of scran if you fancy it. 413 00:14:18,667 --> 00:14:19,700 We've got plans for later. 414 00:14:19,800 --> 00:14:20,600 Where you off? 415 00:14:20,700 --> 00:14:21,533 Chinky. 416 00:14:23,667 --> 00:14:25,900 Prick. 417 00:14:26,000 --> 00:14:27,467 It's a joke. 418 00:14:27,567 --> 00:14:29,467 Like the one you just laughed along with. 419 00:14:29,567 --> 00:14:30,300 Come on, mate. 420 00:14:30,400 --> 00:14:31,867 He's just having a bit of fun. 421 00:14:31,967 --> 00:14:32,767 It's just a word. 422 00:14:32,867 --> 00:14:35,600 Like Paki or nigger. 423 00:14:35,700 --> 00:14:37,133 But that never fails to have me pissing 424 00:14:37,233 --> 00:14:39,533 myself laughing every time I hear it, eh, Jackson? 425 00:14:39,633 --> 00:14:42,100 Rolling around on the floor, splitting my fucking sides. 426 00:14:52,400 --> 00:14:54,133 Everyone knows he's in the wrong. 427 00:14:54,233 --> 00:14:55,767 Shane's a dickhead. 428 00:14:55,867 --> 00:14:57,067 You're smarter. 429 00:14:57,167 --> 00:14:59,567 Just shrug it off for the sake of the family. 430 00:14:59,667 --> 00:15:00,900 The bigger man walks away. 431 00:15:01,000 --> 00:15:02,033 You know you're in the right. 432 00:15:02,133 --> 00:15:03,167 We know you're in the right. 433 00:15:03,267 --> 00:15:04,500 It's not like you're losing face. 434 00:15:04,600 --> 00:15:07,833 It's another bit of hassle we could do without. 435 00:15:07,933 --> 00:15:08,867 Please. 436 00:15:08,967 --> 00:15:09,800 For me. 437 00:15:12,100 --> 00:15:13,933 OK, for you. 438 00:15:14,033 --> 00:15:15,667 My little West End Wendy. 439 00:15:15,767 --> 00:15:17,233 Now, I just want to frighten you. 440 00:15:17,333 --> 00:15:19,800 But you've got a show in a few days, 441 00:15:19,900 --> 00:15:21,233 and you haven't got one fucking act. 442 00:15:21,333 --> 00:15:23,767 So can I get everyone's attention, please? 443 00:15:23,867 --> 00:15:27,467 Now, anyone with an artistic flair that they don't mind 444 00:15:27,567 --> 00:15:29,967 showing, nothing pornographic, can sign up 445 00:15:30,067 --> 00:15:32,900 for Micky's variety show. 446 00:15:33,000 --> 00:15:39,300 This is your chance to show us what you can do. 447 00:15:42,100 --> 00:15:44,667 Forgot to say, anyone who is participating, 448 00:15:44,767 --> 00:15:47,067 it's free ale all night. 449 00:15:47,167 --> 00:15:48,267 What the fuck you doing? 450 00:15:48,367 --> 00:15:49,733 I can't shell out for this? 451 00:15:49,833 --> 00:15:51,267 You don't have to. 452 00:15:51,367 --> 00:15:53,367 Charge at the door, you'll make your money back in no time. 453 00:15:53,467 --> 00:15:55,367 Mum, sort this out, will you? 454 00:15:55,467 --> 00:15:57,133 Oh, Mimi, isn't he gorgeous when he's riled? 455 00:15:57,233 --> 00:15:59,867 If I wasn't his auntie. 456 00:15:59,967 --> 00:16:03,033 [muffled music playing] 457 00:16:15,467 --> 00:16:16,867 You all right? 458 00:16:16,967 --> 00:16:18,200 Why wouldn't I be? 459 00:16:18,300 --> 00:16:19,667 It's just you don't look like somebody's whose 460 00:16:19,767 --> 00:16:21,767 found a long lost brother, the one that you told us you 461 00:16:21,867 --> 00:16:22,733 worshipped. 462 00:16:22,833 --> 00:16:24,233 I've made up to see him. 463 00:16:24,333 --> 00:16:26,700 So made up, you want him out of the house in 24 hours? 464 00:16:26,800 --> 00:16:28,000 Drop it, eh? 465 00:16:28,100 --> 00:16:31,133 Leave it, Micky. 466 00:16:31,233 --> 00:16:32,967 Karen said she needs some more vodka, chips, 467 00:16:33,067 --> 00:16:34,067 and nuts from the seller. 468 00:16:43,367 --> 00:16:45,233 Gullability obviously runs in the family. 469 00:16:48,767 --> 00:16:49,567 Micky. 470 00:16:49,667 --> 00:16:50,367 Micky! 471 00:16:50,467 --> 00:16:53,500 Let me out of here, you bastard. 472 00:16:53,600 --> 00:16:54,433 Just sort it. 473 00:17:02,167 --> 00:17:05,633 He reckons it's about time me and you ought to talk. 474 00:17:05,733 --> 00:17:06,533 And I think he's right. 475 00:17:22,933 --> 00:17:25,567 All the wives take their turn. 476 00:17:25,667 --> 00:17:27,233 That's so considerate. 477 00:17:27,333 --> 00:17:28,367 Thanks. 478 00:17:28,467 --> 00:17:29,900 Otherwise it means that one person ends up doing 479 00:17:30,000 --> 00:17:31,200 the whole lot, week after week. 480 00:17:31,300 --> 00:17:32,600 Which will be right at all, would it? 481 00:17:36,400 --> 00:17:37,067 Oops. 482 00:17:37,167 --> 00:17:38,500 Oh for fuck's-- 483 00:17:38,600 --> 00:17:41,533 I do yours out of some misplaced sense of obligation. 484 00:17:41,633 --> 00:17:44,767 The SS can do their own. 485 00:17:47,967 --> 00:17:49,500 Take turns cooking for each other, too? 486 00:17:49,600 --> 00:17:51,033 Oh, fuck right off. 487 00:17:51,133 --> 00:17:52,800 It will help me infiltrate the group. 488 00:17:52,900 --> 00:17:54,000 You're a trainee teacher! 489 00:17:54,100 --> 00:17:56,200 You're not a member of MI bleeding 5. 490 00:17:56,300 --> 00:17:57,900 No way. - Please. 491 00:17:58,000 --> 00:17:59,200 No! 492 00:17:59,300 --> 00:18:00,533 If I stand any chance of bringing him down. 493 00:18:00,633 --> 00:18:02,300 And who put you in charge of social justice? 494 00:18:02,400 --> 00:18:03,667 Someone needs to make a stand. 495 00:18:03,767 --> 00:18:06,233 And that someone is you? 496 00:18:06,333 --> 00:18:09,667 Jackson, you can't even even put a fucking shelf up. 497 00:18:09,767 --> 00:18:11,067 I'm coming for dinner tonight. 498 00:18:11,167 --> 00:18:13,967 [door slams] 499 00:18:14,067 --> 00:18:17,000 [liquid trickling] 500 00:18:18,333 --> 00:18:19,467 What are you fucking doing? 501 00:18:19,567 --> 00:18:20,833 Oh, that vodka's gone right through me. 502 00:18:20,933 --> 00:18:22,133 I'm pissing like a shire horse. 503 00:18:22,233 --> 00:18:24,433 Well I don't want to see your dangly bits. 504 00:18:24,533 --> 00:18:27,933 Try standing up against the wall and doing it like a normal man. 505 00:18:28,033 --> 00:18:28,900 Normal? 506 00:18:29,000 --> 00:18:30,600 And what the fuck is normal? 507 00:18:30,700 --> 00:18:31,867 Certainly not you. 508 00:18:31,967 --> 00:18:32,800 You have no idea what it's like to be me. 509 00:18:32,900 --> 00:18:34,300 Oh yeah? 510 00:18:34,400 --> 00:18:36,100 You're not the only one with facial hair and hemorrhoids. 511 00:18:36,200 --> 00:18:37,667 How bad my life has when you pissed off. 512 00:18:37,767 --> 00:18:39,067 At least had a life. 513 00:18:39,167 --> 00:18:42,400 All my life was spent coping with being your sister, 514 00:18:42,500 --> 00:18:45,967 while were swanning around being Quentin fucking Crisp. 515 00:18:46,067 --> 00:18:47,833 I had to deal with the fallout. 516 00:18:47,933 --> 00:18:49,100 Quentin fucking Crisp? 517 00:18:49,200 --> 00:18:50,500 I'm not a gay man. 518 00:18:50,600 --> 00:18:51,700 I'm a woman. OK? 519 00:18:51,800 --> 00:18:52,967 Born with a cock. 520 00:18:53,067 --> 00:18:54,200 Yeah. 521 00:18:54,300 --> 00:18:55,433 Definition of a woman with a cock, man. 522 00:18:55,533 --> 00:18:57,633 - I feel like a woman inside. - Oh yeah? 523 00:18:57,733 --> 00:19:00,300 Well I feel like bleedi Pamela Anderson inside. 524 00:19:00,400 --> 00:19:04,567 But not much chance of seeing me in fucking "Baywatch" is there? 525 00:19:04,667 --> 00:19:05,900 - I'm a woman. - Cock. 526 00:19:06,000 --> 00:19:07,167 - Woman. - Cock. 527 00:19:07,267 --> 00:19:08,367 - Woman. - Cock. 528 00:19:08,467 --> 00:19:09,833 Cock. Cock. 529 00:19:09,933 --> 00:19:13,000 [punching sound] 530 00:19:14,367 --> 00:19:15,933 I've been fighting your battles for you, 531 00:19:16,033 --> 00:19:17,333 defending you while you were prancing round 532 00:19:17,433 --> 00:19:18,667 the street in my Ma's heels. 533 00:19:18,767 --> 00:19:23,467 You were a self-indulgent spoiled little bastard. 534 00:19:23,567 --> 00:19:26,533 You've got no idea what I went through! 535 00:19:26,633 --> 00:19:28,033 The pain that I suffered. 536 00:19:28,133 --> 00:19:31,567 All that time you were laughing at me, Mimi. 537 00:19:31,667 --> 00:19:34,400 I was screaming for help. 538 00:19:34,500 --> 00:19:36,500 I was begging for somebody to give me their hand. 539 00:19:36,600 --> 00:19:38,867 And all that time you were laughing 540 00:19:38,967 --> 00:19:41,133 at me, taking the piss. 541 00:19:41,233 --> 00:19:43,733 While I was drowning. 542 00:19:43,833 --> 00:19:44,667 I was drowning. 543 00:19:52,967 --> 00:19:54,200 Oh, your bollock's out. 544 00:19:59,733 --> 00:20:03,533 It was like "The Crying Game" all over again, only in 3D. 545 00:20:03,633 --> 00:20:05,333 Are you two OK now? 546 00:20:10,500 --> 00:20:11,667 If I'd had known. 547 00:20:11,767 --> 00:20:14,900 If we'd had talked, your burden could have been lighter. 548 00:20:15,000 --> 00:20:18,767 We could have gone on Trisham or that gobshite on Granada. 549 00:20:18,867 --> 00:20:20,000 Talked things through. 550 00:20:20,100 --> 00:20:21,800 Reached and understanding. 551 00:20:21,900 --> 00:20:24,200 A resolution. 552 00:20:24,300 --> 00:20:27,600 But from now on, mi casa es su casa. 553 00:20:27,700 --> 00:20:28,800 English, please. 554 00:20:28,900 --> 00:20:30,200 It means her house is my house, love. 555 00:20:30,300 --> 00:20:33,167 As long as you want to stay, you've a welcome here. 556 00:20:33,267 --> 00:20:35,933 Such a lot to catch up on. 557 00:20:36,033 --> 00:20:39,000 Come here, love. 558 00:20:39,100 --> 00:20:40,567 And one more thing you need to now. 559 00:20:40,667 --> 00:20:42,967 Jamie and Shane obviously aren't too comfortable with me around. 560 00:20:43,067 --> 00:20:46,233 So I might as well say this here. 561 00:20:46,333 --> 00:20:48,167 We had a homo play for the football team last year, 562 00:20:48,267 --> 00:20:49,533 and we're cool with him. 563 00:20:49,633 --> 00:20:51,633 I mean, apart from touching him during a tackle. 564 00:20:51,733 --> 00:20:53,100 Or bending down for the ball. 565 00:20:53,200 --> 00:20:55,000 Or him kissing them if they scored. 566 00:20:55,100 --> 00:20:58,800 And the showers, and well, having him on the team. 567 00:20:58,900 --> 00:21:00,167 I've rehearsed this a million times, 568 00:21:00,267 --> 00:21:06,067 and I never got it right, so forgive my bluntness. 569 00:21:06,167 --> 00:21:11,167 Robert Hepburn's days on Earth are numbered. 570 00:21:14,200 --> 00:21:15,033 It's the AIDS, isn't it! 571 00:21:15,133 --> 00:21:16,800 It's God's judgment. 572 00:21:16,900 --> 00:21:19,933 You've been smitten, I fucking knew it. 573 00:21:20,033 --> 00:21:20,867 Oh, sweet Jesus. 574 00:21:20,967 --> 00:21:22,400 I'm going to be next. 575 00:21:22,500 --> 00:21:23,700 Mimi-- 576 00:21:23,800 --> 00:21:25,467 I told your dad more than once it's not in God's plan. 577 00:21:25,567 --> 00:21:26,533 Mimi, love. 578 00:21:26,633 --> 00:21:29,233 If he'd had meant us to do it like that, 579 00:21:29,333 --> 00:21:31,467 he'd have made it easier to get it in. 580 00:21:31,567 --> 00:21:32,833 [slapping sound] 581 00:21:32,933 --> 00:21:33,800 Mimi! 582 00:21:33,900 --> 00:21:35,667 It's not fucking AIDS, OK. 583 00:21:35,767 --> 00:21:37,267 It's not AIDS. 584 00:21:37,367 --> 00:21:39,633 I've been living as a woman for years. 585 00:21:39,733 --> 00:21:41,267 - With a woman? - As. 586 00:21:41,367 --> 00:21:46,100 Undergoing psychiatric evaluation, hormone therapy. 587 00:21:46,200 --> 00:21:49,800 And now I'm just waiting to get the nod. 588 00:21:49,900 --> 00:21:52,133 Come on, I've always said that my John Thomas gets in the way. 589 00:21:52,233 --> 00:21:53,733 Well, pretty soon it won't. 590 00:21:53,833 --> 00:21:55,933 John Thomas? 591 00:21:56,033 --> 00:21:57,433 Snip. 592 00:21:57,533 --> 00:21:59,433 Ooh. 593 00:21:59,533 --> 00:22:00,600 Oh. 594 00:22:00,700 --> 00:22:01,500 [knocking at door] 595 00:22:01,600 --> 00:22:03,167 They're here. 596 00:22:03,267 --> 00:22:04,767 You're fucking kidding. 597 00:22:04,867 --> 00:22:07,467 One word out of place and I will rip their heads off 598 00:22:07,567 --> 00:22:09,167 and shit down necks. 599 00:22:11,500 --> 00:22:12,333 All right. 600 00:22:12,433 --> 00:22:13,800 Come in. 601 00:22:13,900 --> 00:22:14,700 You must be Avril. 602 00:22:14,800 --> 00:22:16,167 Hope you like white. 603 00:22:16,267 --> 00:22:19,833 I like most whites. 604 00:22:19,933 --> 00:22:21,367 Thanks for coming, mate. 605 00:22:21,467 --> 00:22:23,667 Our pleasure. 606 00:22:23,767 --> 00:22:25,867 Welcome. 607 00:22:25,967 --> 00:22:26,767 This is Ellen. 608 00:22:30,833 --> 00:22:31,733 Jackson? 609 00:22:31,833 --> 00:22:32,667 Coats. 610 00:22:35,700 --> 00:22:37,667 Thanks, mate. 611 00:22:37,767 --> 00:22:38,567 Going through. 612 00:22:45,833 --> 00:22:48,700 Two G and Ts please, Micky. 613 00:22:48,800 --> 00:22:50,100 The Scouse transvestite. 614 00:22:50,200 --> 00:22:51,767 Hardly convincing. 615 00:22:51,867 --> 00:22:53,000 Why is that? 616 00:22:53,100 --> 00:22:54,800 The wrong shade of orange for a start. 617 00:22:54,900 --> 00:22:57,200 [punching sound] 618 00:22:58,800 --> 00:23:01,767 Dana wants to audition for the talent night. 619 00:23:01,867 --> 00:23:02,700 Hardly talent. 620 00:23:02,800 --> 00:23:04,167 Even I can do that. 621 00:23:04,267 --> 00:23:06,400 She's got a grip like a python. 622 00:23:06,500 --> 00:23:08,967 The punters call her the penis flytrap. 623 00:23:09,067 --> 00:23:10,633 The things she can do with her labia. 624 00:23:10,733 --> 00:23:13,733 Anyone can smoke a cigar. 625 00:23:13,833 --> 00:23:17,100 What, like that? 626 00:23:17,200 --> 00:23:20,267 [farting noises] 627 00:23:21,800 --> 00:23:23,067 Admittedly not. 628 00:23:23,167 --> 00:23:24,233 No, no, no. 629 00:23:24,333 --> 00:23:25,733 But I'm going to fucking learn one day. 630 00:23:25,833 --> 00:23:27,000 Right, Micky. 631 00:23:27,100 --> 00:23:29,600 Get her third on the bill behind the deaf kid 632 00:23:29,700 --> 00:23:30,667 that did the yodeling you know? 633 00:23:30,767 --> 00:23:32,100 [yodeling] 634 00:23:32,200 --> 00:23:34,133 Audience is going to a picking up after that I think. 635 00:23:34,233 --> 00:23:36,600 And er, me and Bobbi will be rehearsing a 636 00:23:36,700 --> 00:23:38,233 little special something, too. 637 00:23:38,333 --> 00:23:39,533 Won't we? - Yeah. 638 00:23:39,633 --> 00:23:40,467 Sister act. 639 00:23:45,367 --> 00:23:48,367 Shane's clamping anything with wheels. 640 00:23:48,467 --> 00:23:52,433 I'm worried for my mobility. 641 00:23:52,533 --> 00:23:54,133 They've only clamped the bloody pram! 642 00:23:54,233 --> 00:23:55,200 MAN: Bastards. 643 00:24:01,033 --> 00:24:02,833 My punters or too scared to park. 644 00:24:02,933 --> 00:24:05,400 How are the acts going to get their gear in here, Micky? 645 00:24:05,500 --> 00:24:08,300 Where are your tutors expected to park their cars? 646 00:24:11,000 --> 00:24:12,133 What have you done to Shane? 647 00:24:12,233 --> 00:24:13,400 I don't know what you're talking about. 648 00:24:13,500 --> 00:24:15,033 He's not answering his phone. 649 00:24:15,133 --> 00:24:16,533 Well, maybe he's tied up. 650 00:24:16,633 --> 00:24:17,667 You've done something. 651 00:24:17,767 --> 00:24:18,567 Where is he? 652 00:24:24,467 --> 00:24:26,133 Bastards! 653 00:24:26,233 --> 00:24:28,067 I'll fucking kill you. 654 00:24:28,167 --> 00:24:29,500 [shouting] 655 00:24:29,600 --> 00:24:31,167 - You said you'd back off. - What is going on? 656 00:24:31,267 --> 00:24:32,900 I'm just showing our Shane what an inconvenience 657 00:24:33,000 --> 00:24:34,867 it is when you're clamped? 658 00:24:34,967 --> 00:24:36,900 [punching sound] 659 00:24:37,000 --> 00:24:37,800 Pack it in! 660 00:24:37,900 --> 00:24:40,100 You said you'd walk! 661 00:24:40,200 --> 00:24:42,667 You'd do best to remember who pays your wages. 662 00:24:42,767 --> 00:24:46,500 Yeah, time for you to nail your colors, Micky. 663 00:24:46,600 --> 00:24:48,633 He's in on the business. 664 00:24:48,733 --> 00:24:50,300 Silent partner. 665 00:24:50,400 --> 00:24:53,033 You work for me, or you work for him. 666 00:24:53,133 --> 00:24:55,067 Not both. It's time to choose. 667 00:25:01,600 --> 00:25:04,100 Smells fantastic, don't you think Ellen? 668 00:25:04,200 --> 00:25:05,867 It's an old family recipe. 669 00:25:05,967 --> 00:25:11,400 Braised crocodile cheeks in an apricot and prickly pear sauce. 670 00:25:11,500 --> 00:25:15,567 It's a delicacy where my family come from. 671 00:25:15,667 --> 00:25:18,333 Just pulling your leg. Creole chicken. 672 00:25:21,067 --> 00:25:22,333 Really nice of you to invite us. 673 00:25:22,433 --> 00:25:24,967 That's entirely down to Jackson. 674 00:25:25,067 --> 00:25:27,567 I wouldn't normally piss on a member of the BAP 675 00:25:27,667 --> 00:25:28,500 if he were on fire. 676 00:25:32,567 --> 00:25:36,000 We've got a bad reputation, something we're working on. 677 00:25:36,100 --> 00:25:37,067 How, exactly? 678 00:25:37,167 --> 00:25:39,133 Well, we're opening the doors. 679 00:25:39,233 --> 00:25:42,200 If you're British born and bred, you're welcome. 680 00:25:42,300 --> 00:25:45,100 We all know that's to fit in with the legal requirement. 681 00:25:45,200 --> 00:25:48,400 You wouldn't do it if you didn't have to. 682 00:25:48,500 --> 00:25:49,300 Eat. 683 00:25:52,433 --> 00:25:54,067 Avril has every right to be suspicious. 684 00:25:54,167 --> 00:25:56,367 Country's gone to the dogs. 685 00:25:56,467 --> 00:25:57,700 Agreed? 686 00:25:57,800 --> 00:25:59,967 We're all getting ready for that spring, summer, autumn, 687 00:26:00,067 --> 00:26:01,467 and winter of discontent. 688 00:26:01,567 --> 00:26:04,667 So your party isn't waging a war against race anymore? 689 00:26:04,767 --> 00:26:06,767 It's a class war now? 690 00:26:06,867 --> 00:26:09,967 The country's is being run by gang of public school boys 691 00:26:10,067 --> 00:26:12,567 who don't know the meaning of doing without. 692 00:26:12,667 --> 00:26:15,567 A millionaire boys' club who've got the temerity 693 00:26:15,667 --> 00:26:17,467 to tell us to tighten our belts, while they're 694 00:26:17,567 --> 00:26:19,900 heading off to their holiday homes in Barbados. 695 00:26:20,000 --> 00:26:21,533 So it's equality you're after? 696 00:26:21,633 --> 00:26:25,867 Half the British people being treated fairly, put first. 697 00:26:25,967 --> 00:26:27,800 We've got a march this Saturday. 698 00:26:27,900 --> 00:26:29,667 Lefties and students are onto it. 699 00:26:29,767 --> 00:26:31,567 Some contacts at the police have told me they're 700 00:26:31,667 --> 00:26:32,767 going to meet us mob handed. 701 00:26:32,867 --> 00:26:34,633 You're canceling, I hope? 702 00:26:34,733 --> 00:26:37,133 We've got democratic rights of our opinion. 703 00:26:37,233 --> 00:26:38,633 The march is going ahead. 704 00:26:38,733 --> 00:26:41,367 They won't be able to chant their usual racist insults 705 00:26:41,467 --> 00:26:43,167 at us. 706 00:26:43,267 --> 00:26:45,067 Not once they've clocked our poster boy. 707 00:26:52,233 --> 00:26:53,233 You up for it? 708 00:26:53,333 --> 00:26:54,133 Deffo. 709 00:27:00,933 --> 00:27:04,433 You know as well as I do that march will turn into a riot. 710 00:27:04,533 --> 00:27:06,367 You'll be at the front of it. - It won't come to that. 711 00:27:06,467 --> 00:27:09,167 If you're lucky enough not to end up a slab in the morgue, 712 00:27:09,267 --> 00:27:10,600 you'll lose your job. 713 00:27:10,700 --> 00:27:12,133 That won't happen. 714 00:27:12,233 --> 00:27:15,633 Will you take your fucking head from up your ass and wake 715 00:27:15,733 --> 00:27:18,967 up to what it is you're getting involved in, Jackson. 716 00:27:19,067 --> 00:27:20,767 Anyone accuses me of actually going along 717 00:27:20,867 --> 00:27:22,267 with what that lunatic's preaching, 718 00:27:22,367 --> 00:27:26,733 and I remind them that I was the one that leaked this. 719 00:27:26,833 --> 00:27:28,267 What is it? 720 00:27:28,367 --> 00:27:33,000 A list of every BAP member registered to vote in the UK. 721 00:27:33,100 --> 00:27:34,067 Where do you get it? 722 00:27:38,000 --> 00:27:41,067 [keys jangling] 723 00:27:46,967 --> 00:27:49,000 I get this to the papers before the march, 724 00:27:49,100 --> 00:27:50,500 and I save a few heads being kicked. 725 00:27:50,600 --> 00:27:52,600 They'll know it's you. 726 00:27:52,700 --> 00:27:54,267 Not me. 727 00:27:54,367 --> 00:27:56,433 I asked Chesney to do it. 728 00:27:56,533 --> 00:27:59,000 Stop worrying. 729 00:27:59,100 --> 00:28:01,067 Come here. I've got it covered. 730 00:28:05,900 --> 00:28:07,233 [applause] 731 00:28:07,333 --> 00:28:09,267 You nervous, Michael? 732 00:28:09,367 --> 00:28:11,333 You have every fucking right to be. 733 00:28:11,433 --> 00:28:13,233 These are your two choices. 734 00:28:13,333 --> 00:28:14,800 It's all down to you. 735 00:28:14,900 --> 00:28:18,833 And over to the lovely Roberta for that last minute reminder. 736 00:28:18,933 --> 00:28:20,167 Thank you. 737 00:28:20,267 --> 00:28:21,533 Oh, stop it, cheeky. 738 00:28:21,633 --> 00:28:24,733 OK, choose Jamie, and you condemn Shane and Kelly 739 00:28:24,833 --> 00:28:29,200 to a life on the outside, with absolutely no backup whatsoever 740 00:28:29,300 --> 00:28:30,333 from any Maguire. 741 00:28:30,433 --> 00:28:32,233 Within weeks, they'll be sleeping 742 00:28:32,333 --> 00:28:34,133 rough, forced to sell what little they 743 00:28:34,233 --> 00:28:37,933 do have in order to survive. 744 00:28:38,033 --> 00:28:40,567 And choice B, please, Roberta. 745 00:28:40,667 --> 00:28:42,000 Choice B, Shane. 746 00:28:42,100 --> 00:28:44,233 By choosing him, you'll essentially 747 00:28:44,333 --> 00:28:47,000 be dismantling the family business, which means that you 748 00:28:47,100 --> 00:28:48,800 and Jamie will not be able to work for the family, 749 00:28:48,900 --> 00:28:52,300 therefore rendering the family business, by definition, 750 00:28:52,400 --> 00:28:53,933 redundant. 751 00:28:54,033 --> 00:28:55,967 You remember though, Michael choice B 752 00:28:56,067 --> 00:28:57,967 carries the hidden bonus of a return for your Ma 753 00:28:58,067 --> 00:28:59,033 to the Holy Land. 754 00:29:02,467 --> 00:29:03,433 That's right. 755 00:29:03,533 --> 00:29:05,300 Mom will get an all expenses paid 756 00:29:05,400 --> 00:29:09,533 one way trip all the way back to the banks of the Mersey. 757 00:29:09,633 --> 00:29:12,067 Michael, it's time to. 758 00:29:12,167 --> 00:29:14,833 ANNOUNCER: Make your choice. 759 00:29:14,933 --> 00:29:16,467 Choose, choose, choose, choose. 760 00:29:23,933 --> 00:29:27,400 [voices chanting "choose"] 761 00:29:45,167 --> 00:29:46,533 It's time, Micky. 762 00:29:46,633 --> 00:29:47,567 We need a decision. 763 00:29:47,667 --> 00:29:48,467 Not yet. 764 00:29:48,567 --> 00:29:49,433 Do it now. 765 00:29:49,533 --> 00:29:50,200 I can't. 766 00:29:50,300 --> 00:29:51,100 You're going to have to. 767 00:29:51,200 --> 00:29:52,067 I need more time. 768 00:29:52,167 --> 00:29:53,600 Well you haven't got it. 769 00:29:53,700 --> 00:29:55,133 I need an extension. 770 00:29:55,233 --> 00:29:57,900 There's too much to consider on such short notice. 771 00:29:58,000 --> 00:29:59,300 You know what I'm like. 772 00:29:59,400 --> 00:30:01,000 It takes me half an hour to decide which side of bed 773 00:30:01,100 --> 00:30:02,400 to get out of in the morning. 774 00:30:02,500 --> 00:30:05,300 There's only side you can get out, you daft twat. 775 00:30:05,400 --> 00:30:07,467 Your bed's against the wall. 776 00:30:07,567 --> 00:30:08,733 It was a metaphor. 777 00:30:08,833 --> 00:30:11,967 Cornflakes, Weetabix, Cocoa Pops. 778 00:30:12,067 --> 00:30:13,533 Black socks, white socks, sports socks, 779 00:30:13,633 --> 00:30:15,733 boxers, y-front, g-string! 780 00:30:19,067 --> 00:30:21,367 There's too many decisions to make as it is. 781 00:30:21,467 --> 00:30:23,067 Micky, what color do you want these? 782 00:30:23,167 --> 00:30:24,633 How the fuck should I know? 783 00:30:24,733 --> 00:30:28,900 Sorry, Karen. 784 00:30:29,000 --> 00:30:30,433 Two soft whites, please. 785 00:30:34,600 --> 00:30:35,867 Is it true then? 786 00:30:35,967 --> 00:30:37,467 You're just waiting for the snip? 787 00:30:37,567 --> 00:30:39,200 Oh, jungle drums been banging, have they? 788 00:30:39,300 --> 00:30:41,333 What do you do with it while you waiting? 789 00:30:41,433 --> 00:30:44,000 I mean, where do you put it? 790 00:30:44,100 --> 00:30:46,400 Well, let me get the drinks in, 791 00:30:46,500 --> 00:30:50,467 and then I'll tell you all you need to know. 792 00:30:50,567 --> 00:30:53,100 Mimi, can I get a G and T, and whatever 793 00:30:53,200 --> 00:30:54,200 my new best M are having? 794 00:30:54,300 --> 00:30:56,800 These are on me, love. 795 00:30:56,900 --> 00:30:57,700 Oh. 796 00:31:00,467 --> 00:31:04,067 You know, I was always the one with the talent, and the looks. 797 00:31:04,167 --> 00:31:06,767 People used to say to me, I was more of a woman 798 00:31:06,867 --> 00:31:08,733 than she could ever be. 799 00:31:08,833 --> 00:31:09,700 No, they did. 800 00:31:16,967 --> 00:31:18,733 Spag bol all right for you, Bobby? 801 00:31:18,833 --> 00:31:19,667 You know me. 802 00:31:19,767 --> 00:31:22,133 Love a bit of spick. 803 00:31:22,233 --> 00:31:24,433 My slacks ready yet, Mims? 804 00:31:24,533 --> 00:31:25,667 MIMI: Oh, upstairs. 805 00:31:25,767 --> 00:31:27,767 I'll just give them a quick once over with the iron. 806 00:31:31,233 --> 00:31:32,900 You know, we're not that different, me and you. 807 00:31:33,000 --> 00:31:34,833 No, you mean apart from you been 808 00:31:34,933 --> 00:31:39,567 a two-faced shit and slagging off my mom behind her back. 809 00:31:39,667 --> 00:31:40,500 It's grown teeth. 810 00:31:40,600 --> 00:31:41,400 She's my mom. 811 00:31:41,500 --> 00:31:43,367 She's my sister. 812 00:31:43,467 --> 00:31:44,400 I'll tell her. 813 00:31:44,500 --> 00:31:45,767 No, you won't. 814 00:31:45,867 --> 00:31:47,900 You know as well as I do if you let her know that I really 815 00:31:48,000 --> 00:31:50,733 think she's a fat fucking ugly embarrassing waste of space, 816 00:31:50,833 --> 00:31:52,200 it will break her heart. 817 00:31:52,300 --> 00:31:53,600 Don't. 818 00:31:53,700 --> 00:31:55,633 Leaving me alone in Liverpool is the best favor she ever did. 819 00:31:55,733 --> 00:31:57,133 The only reason I'm here is because I've 820 00:31:57,233 --> 00:32:00,167 got nowhere else to go. 821 00:32:00,267 --> 00:32:03,700 You going to tell her that as well? 822 00:32:03,800 --> 00:32:04,800 No. 823 00:32:04,900 --> 00:32:07,300 You haven't got the balls, Micky. 824 00:32:07,400 --> 00:32:10,100 Why don't wait a few weeks? You can have mine. 825 00:32:10,200 --> 00:32:11,700 I'll tell her. 826 00:32:11,800 --> 00:32:13,933 Mimi, Micky's he's got something 827 00:32:14,033 --> 00:32:17,400 he'd like to say I was just saying 828 00:32:17,500 --> 00:32:21,533 I'm really looking forward to your duet with Uncle Robert. 829 00:32:21,633 --> 00:32:23,700 Steal the show. 830 00:32:23,800 --> 00:32:24,867 It's Bobby. 831 00:32:24,967 --> 00:32:26,000 Fucking Robert. 832 00:32:37,033 --> 00:32:38,000 All right, Frank? 833 00:32:41,800 --> 00:32:44,033 [rock music playing] 834 00:32:44,133 --> 00:32:47,233 I'm so high, I don't want to come down, Jimi. 835 00:32:50,233 --> 00:32:53,233 See you on the flip side. 836 00:33:01,000 --> 00:33:03,867 Wanker. 837 00:33:03,967 --> 00:33:05,767 I was hoping you'd be in. 838 00:33:05,867 --> 00:33:07,167 Get in the car. 839 00:33:18,067 --> 00:33:20,733 Some fucker robbed the membership list. 840 00:33:20,833 --> 00:33:22,267 We got a lot of support up on high, 841 00:33:22,367 --> 00:33:24,967 but people would be terrified to back us if this gets out. 842 00:33:25,067 --> 00:33:26,067 If it gets out? 843 00:33:30,967 --> 00:33:33,233 I always keep this memory stick on me. 844 00:33:33,333 --> 00:33:35,867 A mate of My a journo at the paper that got contacted. 845 00:33:35,967 --> 00:33:37,967 He dialed 1-4-7-1. 846 00:33:38,067 --> 00:33:39,333 Got the number. 847 00:33:39,433 --> 00:33:44,467 We did a bit of research, found out who it was. 848 00:33:44,567 --> 00:33:45,467 Go on. 849 00:33:45,567 --> 00:33:47,300 That little Paki bastard you know. 850 00:33:47,400 --> 00:33:48,433 Chesney. 851 00:33:48,533 --> 00:33:51,600 Listen, Chesney isn't politically minded. 852 00:33:51,700 --> 00:33:53,000 Not in that sense. 853 00:33:53,100 --> 00:33:54,267 He's been through my stuff in the changing rooms 854 00:33:54,367 --> 00:33:55,700 while we've been playing footie. 855 00:33:55,800 --> 00:33:56,800 So are you going to do? 856 00:33:56,900 --> 00:33:57,967 You're going to give him a hiding? 857 00:33:58,067 --> 00:34:00,267 I'm going to make an example of him. 858 00:34:00,367 --> 00:34:01,767 What do you mean, an example? 859 00:34:01,867 --> 00:34:04,733 A couple of the lads are on their way over, tooled up. 860 00:34:04,833 --> 00:34:06,900 We're going to have a few cocktails. 861 00:34:07,000 --> 00:34:08,267 Cocktails? 862 00:34:08,367 --> 00:34:10,267 Always have a few drinks at a barbie, don't you? 863 00:34:19,833 --> 00:34:23,100 - Mimi, same again. - OK. 864 00:34:23,200 --> 00:34:26,300 It can't have been easy growing up, knowing what you 865 00:34:26,400 --> 00:34:29,133 knew, that you were trapped. 866 00:34:29,233 --> 00:34:31,900 I can't imagine what that must feel like. 867 00:34:32,000 --> 00:34:33,633 - I can. - Oh, well. 868 00:34:33,733 --> 00:34:35,367 Everyone's got their burden, haven't they? 869 00:34:35,467 --> 00:34:36,967 How come it's taken this long? 870 00:34:37,067 --> 00:34:38,900 You mean, having his cock cut off? 871 00:34:39,000 --> 00:34:40,800 I didn't have the confidence. 872 00:34:40,900 --> 00:34:42,733 It's not like I had the backing of my family, either. 873 00:34:42,833 --> 00:34:45,833 To be fair, it can't have been easy news for your mother 874 00:34:45,933 --> 00:34:47,100 and father to absorb. 875 00:34:47,200 --> 00:34:48,300 When Rodney told me he was a philatelist, 876 00:34:48,400 --> 00:34:50,500 I couldn't get out of bed for a month. 877 00:34:50,600 --> 00:34:52,167 Expect that from the older generation. 878 00:34:52,267 --> 00:34:54,500 But the one place I expected just a little bit of support 879 00:34:54,600 --> 00:34:57,800 was from my own sister. 880 00:34:57,900 --> 00:34:59,700 And it never came. 881 00:34:59,800 --> 00:35:04,967 Tried to end it all a few times, scream for help 882 00:35:05,067 --> 00:35:07,700 that was never answered. 883 00:35:07,800 --> 00:35:09,700 Abandoned at 16. 884 00:35:09,800 --> 00:35:10,933 Mom and dad dead. 885 00:35:11,033 --> 00:35:13,567 With burden of a penis you never wanted. 886 00:35:13,667 --> 00:35:16,167 When I had my appendix out, they gave it to me in a jar. 887 00:35:16,267 --> 00:35:18,000 Are you thinking-- - No. 888 00:35:18,100 --> 00:35:20,167 Here you go, girls. 889 00:35:20,267 --> 00:35:23,700 Run off my feet here. 890 00:35:23,800 --> 00:35:25,633 Everything all right? 891 00:35:25,733 --> 00:35:26,533 Fine. 892 00:35:35,267 --> 00:35:36,833 Need to get some scram, need to get some bread 893 00:35:36,933 --> 00:35:38,900 rolls, mayo, cans of tuna. 894 00:35:39,000 --> 00:35:40,467 Cans of ham. 895 00:35:40,567 --> 00:35:42,133 We can rustle up a decent buffet between us. 896 00:35:42,233 --> 00:35:43,500 Well, you know what they say? 897 00:35:43,600 --> 00:35:45,167 When the going gets tough, the tough go shopping. 898 00:35:45,267 --> 00:35:47,000 I'll get a few bob out of petty cash. 899 00:35:47,100 --> 00:35:48,733 Will you go for it? 900 00:35:48,833 --> 00:35:51,900 In these heels? 901 00:35:52,000 --> 00:35:53,867 Well, I'd rather have ham. 902 00:35:53,967 --> 00:35:56,133 I'll put cheese on the bit. 903 00:35:56,233 --> 00:35:57,700 Come here! You shit. 904 00:35:57,800 --> 00:35:58,767 I know your dad! 905 00:35:58,867 --> 00:36:00,267 Well, I fucking don't. 906 00:36:00,367 --> 00:36:01,167 Dickhead. 907 00:36:05,133 --> 00:36:06,433 At least we know he's in. 908 00:36:06,533 --> 00:36:08,200 Soon as the lads arrive, we're on. 909 00:36:08,300 --> 00:36:10,633 It's time for you to prove yourself. 910 00:36:10,733 --> 00:36:11,767 We're shaping history, Jackson. 911 00:36:11,867 --> 00:36:13,067 You should be proud. 912 00:36:18,467 --> 00:36:19,967 It'll be fine, son, the show. 913 00:36:20,067 --> 00:36:21,567 It'll be great, I can feel it. 914 00:36:21,667 --> 00:36:22,367 You reckon? 915 00:36:22,467 --> 00:36:23,767 The whole estate's buzzing. 916 00:36:23,867 --> 00:36:26,567 It's going to be one to remember. 917 00:36:26,667 --> 00:36:28,400 Proud of you. 918 00:36:28,500 --> 00:36:29,700 Yeah. 919 00:36:29,800 --> 00:36:31,833 Well, not everyone could organize a night like this. 920 00:36:31,933 --> 00:36:34,100 Takes a lot of dedication and skill. 921 00:36:34,200 --> 00:36:36,667 And don't forget, there's a little of Bobby's 922 00:36:36,767 --> 00:36:38,433 DNA running through them veins. 923 00:36:43,600 --> 00:36:44,500 Decision time. 924 00:36:44,600 --> 00:36:45,900 Time to make your choice, Micky. 925 00:36:46,000 --> 00:36:46,933 I can't. 926 00:36:47,033 --> 00:36:48,800 I need a slash. 927 00:36:48,900 --> 00:36:50,167 Straight in, straight out. 928 00:36:50,267 --> 00:36:51,667 Come on, we've got plans to make. 929 00:36:51,767 --> 00:36:53,067 We've got plans to make. 930 00:37:04,867 --> 00:37:07,733 [sound of urinating] 931 00:37:18,133 --> 00:37:19,333 BOBBI: We need some bread rolls. 932 00:37:19,433 --> 00:37:20,333 MIMI: Could you go for it? 933 00:37:20,433 --> 00:37:21,433 BOBBI: What, in these heels? 934 00:37:30,033 --> 00:37:31,733 You can work this to your advantage. 935 00:37:31,833 --> 00:37:33,400 Soft ass. 936 00:37:33,500 --> 00:37:36,167 All you've ever done is give to those bastards. 937 00:37:36,267 --> 00:37:37,700 And what they given you in return? 938 00:37:37,800 --> 00:37:39,400 Their respect? 939 00:37:39,500 --> 00:37:40,133 Their love? 940 00:37:40,233 --> 00:37:42,367 Fuck off, they love me. 941 00:37:42,467 --> 00:37:44,367 They've got a fucked up way of showing it. 942 00:37:44,467 --> 00:37:47,133 It's hardly surprising, with the parenting you've had. 943 00:37:51,400 --> 00:37:53,833 50/50? 944 00:37:53,933 --> 00:37:55,500 Come on. 945 00:37:55,600 --> 00:37:56,633 Come away with me. 946 00:37:56,733 --> 00:37:58,400 Sun all year round. 947 00:37:58,500 --> 00:37:59,733 Sandy beaches. 948 00:37:59,833 --> 00:38:01,000 And all the cock you can handle. 949 00:38:01,100 --> 00:38:02,100 Come on. 950 00:38:09,833 --> 00:38:10,733 Jamie! 951 00:38:10,833 --> 00:38:12,167 Shane! 952 00:38:12,267 --> 00:38:13,100 They're going to shit on you the rest of your life 953 00:38:13,200 --> 00:38:14,200 if you let them. 954 00:38:23,033 --> 00:38:24,033 Bang on time. 955 00:38:35,267 --> 00:38:36,567 You know the drill, boys. 956 00:38:41,567 --> 00:38:45,167 Soon as it's alight, chuck the can into the flames, and walk. 957 00:38:48,900 --> 00:38:50,533 No. 958 00:38:50,633 --> 00:38:52,467 Everything I've worked for, everything 959 00:38:52,567 --> 00:38:54,200 I've built up over the past 10 years, 960 00:38:54,300 --> 00:38:56,933 has been fucked over good and proper by that little bastard. 961 00:38:57,033 --> 00:38:58,033 And he's going to pay. 962 00:38:58,133 --> 00:38:59,700 Get your fucking bala on. 963 00:39:12,867 --> 00:39:13,867 Mark, Mark, Mark. 964 00:39:13,967 --> 00:39:16,333 I'll do anything. 965 00:39:16,433 --> 00:39:17,467 Stand up for your rights Jackson. 966 00:39:17,567 --> 00:39:19,800 That's all I'm asking for you to do. 967 00:39:19,900 --> 00:39:20,767 Get out! 968 00:39:20,867 --> 00:39:22,733 Everyone out! 969 00:39:22,833 --> 00:39:25,700 Get out! 970 00:39:25,800 --> 00:39:27,667 Fuck! 971 00:39:27,767 --> 00:39:30,633 [punching sound] 972 00:39:30,733 --> 00:39:32,600 Piss off, love. 973 00:39:32,700 --> 00:39:35,133 [man grunting] 974 00:39:37,600 --> 00:39:40,467 [rock music playing] 975 00:39:42,933 --> 00:39:44,933 FRANK GALLAGHER: I've Go back, Jimi! 976 00:39:45,033 --> 00:39:46,067 Cheers, Frank! 977 00:39:49,567 --> 00:39:52,433 [punching sounds] 978 00:39:57,567 --> 00:39:58,367 Fucker! 979 00:40:08,633 --> 00:40:10,700 It was me you copied your membership list. 980 00:40:10,800 --> 00:40:13,100 And when I see you again, if I have any trouble from you, 981 00:40:13,200 --> 00:40:16,000 it will find its way to the national press. 982 00:40:16,100 --> 00:40:17,567 You got that? 983 00:40:17,667 --> 00:40:18,500 Good. 984 00:40:25,900 --> 00:40:26,800 And this is for Ches. 985 00:40:36,700 --> 00:40:39,967 You robbed the takings from your own sister? 986 00:40:40,067 --> 00:40:41,867 Well what can I say? 987 00:40:41,967 --> 00:40:43,333 I'm sorry. 988 00:40:43,433 --> 00:40:45,733 I'm still trying to get my head around this. 989 00:40:45,833 --> 00:40:49,800 From your own flesh and blood. 990 00:40:49,900 --> 00:40:50,967 Oh, cut the bullshit, please. 991 00:40:51,067 --> 00:40:52,067 Will you, girl? 992 00:40:52,167 --> 00:40:53,400 Flesh and blood? 993 00:40:53,500 --> 00:40:56,400 We never even fucking liked each other. 994 00:40:56,500 --> 00:40:59,067 We misunderstood each other. 995 00:40:59,167 --> 00:41:00,733 We will young, immature. 996 00:41:00,833 --> 00:41:03,467 Mimi, can I just set the record straight here? 997 00:41:03,567 --> 00:41:05,233 You've said often enough I was never 998 00:41:05,333 --> 00:41:06,700 the brother that you wanted. 999 00:41:06,800 --> 00:41:08,300 Well, here's funny thing. 1000 00:41:08,400 --> 00:41:10,967 You were never the fucking sister I wanted. 1001 00:41:11,067 --> 00:41:12,133 You watch your fucking mouth. 1002 00:41:12,233 --> 00:41:13,500 You think I'm frightened of you? 1003 00:41:13,600 --> 00:41:15,200 You think cause I act like this, dress like this, 1004 00:41:15,300 --> 00:41:16,567 I can't handle myself. 1005 00:41:16,667 --> 00:41:19,500 Back the fuck off, pretty boy. - Leave it, Jamie. 1006 00:41:23,200 --> 00:41:25,500 Your Ma said she used to be embarrassed of me. 1007 00:41:25,600 --> 00:41:27,933 Well, it was nothing to what I felt when I'd see her waddling 1008 00:41:28,033 --> 00:41:30,267 down the street with her fucking bobble perm, 1009 00:41:30,367 --> 00:41:33,400 and her fucking shellsuits. 1010 00:41:33,500 --> 00:41:35,767 More of a woman than you'll ever be, though. 1011 00:41:35,867 --> 00:41:38,467 It's debatable. 1012 00:41:38,567 --> 00:41:40,400 There wasn't one ounce of femininity about you 1013 00:41:40,500 --> 00:41:42,033 when we were being dragged up. 1014 00:41:44,433 --> 00:41:47,133 When I got up in the morning, it was to get the house ready, 1015 00:41:47,233 --> 00:41:49,400 and you to school. 1016 00:41:49,500 --> 00:41:52,000 Then I nursed my Ma until she died. 1017 00:41:52,100 --> 00:41:54,767 Then I helped my dad deal with the grief. 1018 00:41:54,867 --> 00:41:58,133 When was I supposed to find time to paint my nails 1019 00:41:58,233 --> 00:41:59,200 and do my hair? 1020 00:41:59,300 --> 00:42:00,800 Oh the trials of Saint Mimi. 1021 00:42:00,900 --> 00:42:03,167 You have to be careful, the stigmata will start playing up. 1022 00:42:03,267 --> 00:42:04,500 Watch your mouth. 1023 00:42:04,600 --> 00:42:06,033 If you want fucking knocking out by a pre-op, 1024 00:42:06,133 --> 00:42:08,700 Shane, you just go for it. 1025 00:42:08,800 --> 00:42:10,133 Leave us, the three of you. 1026 00:42:25,133 --> 00:42:27,500 What will it cost? 1027 00:42:27,600 --> 00:42:30,100 To go from pole to hole? 1028 00:42:30,200 --> 00:42:32,100 You mean to complete my dream? 1029 00:42:32,200 --> 00:42:34,767 Give me the life you should have had, but never did? 1030 00:42:34,867 --> 00:42:36,233 Give me the start I should have had? 1031 00:42:42,767 --> 00:42:43,567 Priceless. 1032 00:42:53,567 --> 00:42:54,433 Bye, Bobbi. 1033 00:43:08,800 --> 00:43:10,467 You let Bobbi go? 1034 00:43:10,567 --> 00:43:13,567 With the cash, why? 1035 00:43:13,667 --> 00:43:15,433 Cause he's my brother. 1036 00:43:15,533 --> 00:43:16,867 Sort of. 1037 00:43:16,967 --> 00:43:19,033 And that's what you do. 1038 00:43:19,133 --> 00:43:22,267 And any more talk of choosing sides, and Bobbi 1039 00:43:22,367 --> 00:43:25,767 won't be the only one getting his cock cut off. 1040 00:43:25,867 --> 00:43:26,700 Comprende? 1041 00:43:31,200 --> 00:43:32,567 She might have a point. 1042 00:43:32,667 --> 00:43:34,200 Yeah. 1043 00:43:34,300 --> 00:43:35,300 But you're fucking barred. 1044 00:43:47,733 --> 00:43:50,000 Listen, listen. 1045 00:43:50,100 --> 00:43:52,167 Right, if anything goes wrong, improvise, yeah? 1046 00:43:52,267 --> 00:43:53,567 The audience won't give a fuck. 1047 00:43:53,667 --> 00:43:55,133 They'll be pissed anyway. 1048 00:43:55,233 --> 00:43:57,433 So let's get our royal seal of approval. 1049 00:44:00,067 --> 00:44:01,867 Remember, there's no "I" in showbiz. 1050 00:44:01,967 --> 00:44:02,800 Yeah, there is. 1051 00:44:06,433 --> 00:44:07,100 Ready? 1052 00:44:07,200 --> 00:44:08,167 Go break your legs! 1053 00:44:19,100 --> 00:44:22,567 [drumroll] 1054 00:44:22,667 --> 00:44:25,567 [squishing sound] 1055 00:44:38,500 --> 00:44:41,367 Someone get that pin off her, for fuck's sake. 1056 00:44:44,433 --> 00:44:47,300 [crowd gasping] 1057 00:44:56,567 --> 00:44:58,633 MIMI: (SINGING) For a special treat. 1058 00:45:06,100 --> 00:45:09,967 Yeah, one can take a walk in the moonlight, 1059 00:45:10,067 --> 00:45:11,967 thinking that it's really nice. 1060 00:45:12,067 --> 00:45:14,700 (SINGING) But two walking hand in hand 1061 00:45:14,800 --> 00:45:20,133 is like adding just a pinch off-- 1062 00:45:20,233 --> 00:45:24,100 (SINGING) It takes two, baby. 1063 00:45:24,200 --> 00:45:26,633 Me and you. 1064 00:45:26,733 --> 00:45:28,033 MIMI: Face facts. 1065 00:45:28,133 --> 00:45:30,600 No family is perfect. 1066 00:45:30,700 --> 00:45:34,400 Might appear to be on the surface, but open it up, 1067 00:45:34,500 --> 00:45:37,233 and you find all the shit no one wants 1068 00:45:37,333 --> 00:45:40,567 to acknowledge even exists. 1069 00:45:40,667 --> 00:45:44,500 You've got to take your head out of the sand in the end. 1070 00:45:44,600 --> 00:45:46,300 All families are fucked. 1071 00:45:46,400 --> 00:45:49,533 Ignore that advice at your peril. 1072 00:45:49,633 --> 00:45:51,367 [music playing] 1073 00:46:48,467 --> 00:46:51,667 [screaming]