1 00:00:04,433 --> 00:00:05,900 [tapping] 2 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:09,300 Anyone watching thinking they know fuck all about knowing 3 00:00:09,400 --> 00:00:12,533 fuck all about owt, needs to watch their backs. 4 00:00:12,633 --> 00:00:15,567 So you've had your Labour reclassifying skunk, 5 00:00:15,667 --> 00:00:19,767 sending prices sky high, literally, literally taking 6 00:00:19,867 --> 00:00:21,833 the grass from its own roots. 7 00:00:21,933 --> 00:00:24,167 Now you've got you're Con-Dem-Nation, 8 00:00:24,267 --> 00:00:28,167 Liberals noshing Tories like alter boys picking DIMPs up. 9 00:00:28,267 --> 00:00:31,833 Have we had a national fucking stroke, or what? 10 00:00:31,933 --> 00:00:35,700 Is revolution a word, or was it never? 11 00:00:35,800 --> 00:00:39,633 Anybody watching needs to know we cope better than average 12 00:00:39,733 --> 00:00:41,100 with irony in Chatsworth. 13 00:00:41,200 --> 00:00:45,000 Well, for fuck's sake, we live in Manchester, 14 00:00:45,100 --> 00:00:47,600 and they charge us for water? 15 00:00:47,700 --> 00:00:52,300 I wandered lonely as a clown, necking mushrooms rarely found. 16 00:00:52,400 --> 00:00:55,967 This green and pleasant land in ancient times. 17 00:00:56,067 --> 00:00:59,100 Yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak. 18 00:00:59,200 --> 00:01:02,167 It's not theirs anymore. 19 00:01:02,267 --> 00:01:04,967 This is our England now! 20 00:01:05,067 --> 00:01:06,033 Party! 21 00:01:10,500 --> 00:01:11,400 [music playing] 22 00:01:17,833 --> 00:01:20,500 Cogito ergo sum. 23 00:01:20,600 --> 00:01:24,367 Pardon my French, well, Latin, actually. 24 00:01:24,467 --> 00:01:28,333 The English is, "I think, therefore I am," 25 00:01:28,433 --> 00:01:31,100 a phrase captured by some snail-chewer 26 00:01:31,200 --> 00:01:32,600 called Rene Descartes. 27 00:01:35,367 --> 00:01:38,167 Essentially, it means that because you 28 00:01:38,267 --> 00:01:40,700 are capable of logical thoughts, you 29 00:01:40,800 --> 00:01:42,633 are aware of your existence. 30 00:01:45,000 --> 00:01:49,333 But by the same method, you haven't got the foggiest what's 31 00:01:49,433 --> 00:01:52,767 going on in my head, so there's no real way 32 00:01:52,867 --> 00:01:55,200 of knowing I definitely exist. 33 00:01:55,300 --> 00:01:57,467 I could be a figment of your imagination. 34 00:01:57,567 --> 00:02:02,733 Me and everything, you know, everyone in your world. 35 00:02:19,400 --> 00:02:20,300 [whirring] 36 00:02:28,367 --> 00:02:29,267 [drumming] 37 00:02:33,367 --> 00:02:34,267 [beeping] 38 00:02:35,367 --> 00:02:36,267 [whirring] 39 00:02:38,133 --> 00:02:39,233 [music - david bowie, "starman"] 40 00:02:39,333 --> 00:02:43,500 There's a starman waiting in the sky. 41 00:02:43,600 --> 00:02:46,667 He'd like to come and meet us but he 42 00:02:46,767 --> 00:02:48,500 thinks he'd blow our minds. 43 00:02:48,600 --> 00:02:53,233 There's a starman, waiting in the sky. 44 00:02:54,733 --> 00:03:21,033 [music playing] 45 00:03:21,133 --> 00:03:22,733 [beeping] 46 00:04:21,867 --> 00:04:23,433 Fuck off! 47 00:04:23,533 --> 00:04:24,867 Come on. 48 00:04:24,967 --> 00:04:26,533 What, a stag night? 49 00:04:26,633 --> 00:04:29,633 If I wanted an evening of ritual humiliation, I'd stay at home. 50 00:04:29,733 --> 00:04:31,600 Are you sure you want to go through with this wedding? 51 00:04:31,700 --> 00:04:34,200 You won't catch me getting married again. 52 00:04:34,300 --> 00:04:37,400 I am not going to stay and have my private life dissected 53 00:04:37,500 --> 00:04:39,933 and judged by the likes of you. 54 00:04:40,033 --> 00:04:41,033 Same again, Jamie. 55 00:04:41,133 --> 00:04:42,133 My round, lads. 56 00:04:44,967 --> 00:04:48,300 'Cause I don't know how I can even 57 00:04:48,400 --> 00:04:53,433 begin to explain what it is that me and Libby have got, 58 00:04:53,533 --> 00:04:54,567 precisely. 59 00:04:54,667 --> 00:04:56,133 Er, try. 60 00:05:00,367 --> 00:05:02,033 Well, starters, we're in love. 61 00:05:02,133 --> 00:05:03,133 [laughing] 62 00:05:04,567 --> 00:05:06,567 [laughing] 63 00:05:06,667 --> 00:05:09,400 Just because you've never had the love of a good man. 64 00:05:09,500 --> 00:05:11,400 Oh, the only things Frank loves 65 00:05:11,500 --> 00:05:14,033 come with the government's health warning. 66 00:05:14,133 --> 00:05:15,533 We're soul mates. 67 00:05:15,633 --> 00:05:17,400 [laughing] 68 00:05:17,500 --> 00:05:18,333 [laughing] 69 00:05:19,200 --> 00:05:21,367 Her soul, my soul. 70 00:05:21,467 --> 00:05:22,200 Arsehole! 71 00:05:22,300 --> 00:05:23,700 Well said, sweet pea. 72 00:05:23,800 --> 00:05:25,800 I don't need a ring on my finger, or a blessing from fuck 73 00:05:25,900 --> 00:05:27,533 knows who, but she does. 74 00:05:27,633 --> 00:05:29,333 She's happy, I'm happy. 75 00:05:29,433 --> 00:05:32,767 OK, he's not perfect, but who the bloody hell is? 76 00:05:32,867 --> 00:05:33,933 I'm not far off. 77 00:05:34,033 --> 00:05:35,367 A few minor blemishes, but-- 78 00:05:35,467 --> 00:05:36,633 This is no time for jokes. 79 00:05:36,733 --> 00:05:38,100 Who's joking? 80 00:05:38,200 --> 00:05:39,867 Any wonder she's been on the shelf 81 00:05:39,967 --> 00:05:41,400 as long as she has with that attitude. 82 00:05:41,500 --> 00:05:43,767 When I were her age, men were falling all over themselves 83 00:05:43,867 --> 00:05:45,000 to get to me. 84 00:05:45,100 --> 00:05:47,267 Falling over their fucking guide dogs. 85 00:05:52,200 --> 00:05:54,333 We were just pulling your leg. 86 00:05:54,433 --> 00:05:55,600 That's what I was just saying. 87 00:05:55,700 --> 00:05:57,933 Frank altered since they've been together. 88 00:05:58,033 --> 00:05:59,900 Often hear him in the pub talking about you. 89 00:06:00,000 --> 00:06:03,467 People saying they've never seen him so happy. 90 00:06:03,567 --> 00:06:07,933 The cause of all the trouble in all the world, 91 00:06:08,033 --> 00:06:13,167 since the dawn of time, can be traced right back by a one, 92 00:06:13,267 --> 00:06:17,233 singular route to the mustache. 93 00:06:17,333 --> 00:06:23,400 Hitler, Stalin, Lenin, Mandelson, down you go! 94 00:06:23,500 --> 00:06:24,333 [gasping] 95 00:06:25,833 --> 00:06:26,700 Freddie Mercury! 96 00:06:31,200 --> 00:06:32,933 I'm not stupid. 97 00:06:33,033 --> 00:06:35,033 I'm aware of his shortcomings. 98 00:06:35,133 --> 00:06:40,133 And I'm going into this with my eyes open. 99 00:06:40,233 --> 00:06:42,667 Well if only you'd set your sights a little higher. 100 00:06:46,233 --> 00:06:47,633 And the cupboard was bare. 101 00:06:47,733 --> 00:06:49,200 Right, girls, pub. 102 00:06:49,300 --> 00:06:51,200 I'll be over as soon as Liam shows. 103 00:06:51,300 --> 00:06:53,367 Oh, should have asked Mickey to keep an eye on her, 104 00:06:53,467 --> 00:06:54,567 he's got Cilla. 105 00:06:54,667 --> 00:06:56,933 Just as easy to look after two kids as it is one. 106 00:06:57,033 --> 00:06:59,233 How the fuck would you know? 107 00:06:59,333 --> 00:07:00,933 You're sticking with with then, Cilla? 108 00:07:01,033 --> 00:07:02,133 Are you a fan? 109 00:07:02,233 --> 00:07:04,800 Step Inside Love's a great song. 110 00:07:04,900 --> 00:07:06,333 Is it a Liverpoodlian thing? 111 00:07:06,433 --> 00:07:08,533 But I always preferred Lulu. 112 00:07:08,633 --> 00:07:11,700 That thing she did with her accent, Scottish one minute, 113 00:07:11,800 --> 00:07:14,333 English the next, such talent. 114 00:07:17,233 --> 00:07:20,200 It's got nothing to do with being Scouse, Lillian, 115 00:07:20,300 --> 00:07:21,933 and everything to do with the birth being one 116 00:07:22,033 --> 00:07:23,900 fuck of a Surprise Surprise. 117 00:07:24,000 --> 00:07:25,467 Cilla Maguire, then. 118 00:07:25,567 --> 00:07:26,333 Stop fishing. 119 00:07:26,433 --> 00:07:28,667 Come on, Mimi, who's the daddy? 120 00:07:28,767 --> 00:07:31,400 You really do want your face rearranging, don't you? 121 00:07:34,100 --> 00:07:35,400 Who could blame her? 122 00:07:35,500 --> 00:07:36,333 Later, Libs. 123 00:07:42,233 --> 00:07:43,300 [music playing] 124 00:07:46,800 --> 00:07:47,700 Hiya, Avril. 125 00:07:50,767 --> 00:07:52,233 Is everything all right? 126 00:07:54,933 --> 00:07:57,200 Letitia. 127 00:07:57,300 --> 00:07:58,867 Letitia! 128 00:07:58,967 --> 00:08:00,533 Your father's here. 129 00:08:00,633 --> 00:08:01,733 He's at football. 130 00:08:01,833 --> 00:08:05,033 Goalie got a groin strain, match was cancelled. 131 00:08:05,133 --> 00:08:06,567 Why didn't you get changed? 132 00:08:06,667 --> 00:08:08,533 If your father finds out I've sent you to private school, 133 00:08:08,633 --> 00:08:09,733 he'll kill me! 134 00:08:09,833 --> 00:08:11,033 I don't know how much longer I can keep this up. 135 00:08:11,133 --> 00:08:12,133 Once you're in uni, it's all over. 136 00:08:12,233 --> 00:08:13,633 I might not even get into uni. 137 00:08:13,733 --> 00:08:15,567 Oh, you better bloody had. 138 00:08:15,667 --> 00:08:19,600 The amount I spent sending you to that place. 139 00:08:19,700 --> 00:08:24,433 I want the lot, GCSEs, A-levels, and first-class degree. 140 00:08:27,767 --> 00:08:30,800 Liam's asked if she can give him a hand with his homework again. 141 00:08:30,900 --> 00:08:32,533 Should bring him in here. 142 00:08:32,633 --> 00:08:37,700 He doesn't like anyone knowing he's struggling. 143 00:08:37,800 --> 00:08:41,233 [music playing] 144 00:08:41,333 --> 00:08:43,000 Mm. 145 00:08:43,100 --> 00:08:45,533 I'll put the lock on. 146 00:08:53,667 --> 00:08:55,400 This do ya? 147 00:08:55,500 --> 00:08:56,767 [grunting] 148 00:09:01,400 --> 00:09:02,200 Ah! 149 00:09:02,300 --> 00:09:03,033 Ah ah! 150 00:09:03,133 --> 00:09:04,033 Too soon! 151 00:09:04,133 --> 00:09:06,633 Too soon! 152 00:09:06,733 --> 00:09:10,633 You like it like that, eh? 153 00:09:10,733 --> 00:09:11,700 You want a bit of that. 154 00:09:11,800 --> 00:09:12,600 Yeah. 155 00:09:15,700 --> 00:09:17,600 Oh! 156 00:09:17,700 --> 00:09:18,600 Oh! 157 00:09:18,700 --> 00:09:19,533 Yeah! 158 00:09:22,267 --> 00:09:23,267 Oh! 159 00:09:23,367 --> 00:09:24,167 Ah! 160 00:09:35,100 --> 00:09:36,500 Go to mummy. 161 00:09:36,600 --> 00:09:38,500 Look after the baby a bit longer, will you, son? 162 00:09:44,767 --> 00:09:46,033 [music playing] 163 00:09:46,133 --> 00:09:47,400 Hiya, Stevie. 164 00:09:47,500 --> 00:09:50,233 Don't know if you remember me, but-- 165 00:09:50,333 --> 00:09:51,433 Mimi? 166 00:09:51,533 --> 00:09:53,867 Phil, I know this sounds weird, and believe me 167 00:09:53,967 --> 00:09:55,167 all I'm after is answers. 168 00:09:55,267 --> 00:09:57,067 Would it be possible to talk inside? 169 00:09:57,167 --> 00:09:58,800 I don't think the wife would be too impressed. 170 00:09:58,900 --> 00:10:01,033 What I need to know is if you can 171 00:10:01,133 --> 00:10:04,367 remember when we got together? 172 00:10:04,467 --> 00:10:05,800 I need you to take a blood test. 173 00:10:05,900 --> 00:10:06,900 Shit. 174 00:10:07,000 --> 00:10:08,133 You've not got the AIDS, have you? 175 00:10:08,233 --> 00:10:09,067 Definitely August? 176 00:10:09,167 --> 00:10:10,500 Look, I was pissed. 177 00:10:10,600 --> 00:10:12,200 To see if you're me child's father. 178 00:10:12,300 --> 00:10:13,167 No chance of that, Mimi. 179 00:10:13,267 --> 00:10:15,133 I got the snip 20 years ago. 180 00:10:15,233 --> 00:10:18,233 It was a one-night stand and I'm cool with that. 181 00:10:18,333 --> 00:10:19,700 What was a one-night stand? 182 00:10:19,800 --> 00:10:20,633 Shit. 183 00:10:20,733 --> 00:10:22,033 It's not what you think. 184 00:10:22,133 --> 00:10:26,533 And what the fuck would you know about what I think? 185 00:10:26,633 --> 00:10:27,800 She's out tonight. 186 00:10:27,900 --> 00:10:30,567 Ohh, any chance of a rematch? 187 00:10:30,667 --> 00:10:33,433 I took advantage, hon-- oh! 188 00:10:33,533 --> 00:10:34,367 [yelling] 189 00:10:37,167 --> 00:10:38,367 You bitch! 190 00:10:38,467 --> 00:10:39,767 You've ruined everything! Going 191 00:10:39,867 --> 00:10:40,700 Mimi? 192 00:10:44,933 --> 00:10:46,233 Can I see your dad, please, Andy? 193 00:10:46,333 --> 00:10:47,133 Sure. 194 00:11:08,433 --> 00:11:09,900 I'm off t'pub. 195 00:11:10,000 --> 00:11:11,033 Planning the wedding. 196 00:11:11,133 --> 00:11:13,100 I'm so excited I can't tell you. 197 00:11:13,200 --> 00:11:15,633 We're having ice sculptures, famous Mancunians 198 00:11:15,733 --> 00:11:16,567 in literature. 199 00:11:16,667 --> 00:11:18,133 [knocking] 200 00:11:22,633 --> 00:11:24,133 I'm sorry to disturb you. 201 00:11:24,233 --> 00:11:27,267 Is it possible to speak to Mr. Gallagher, please? 202 00:11:27,367 --> 00:11:29,233 Vernon Francis Gallagher? 203 00:11:29,333 --> 00:11:31,733 I'm afraid he's not in at the moment. 204 00:11:31,833 --> 00:11:33,567 I'm his fiance, can I help you? 205 00:11:38,800 --> 00:11:43,733 It's about his daughter, Deborah Gallagher. 206 00:11:43,833 --> 00:11:46,233 So what's all this about? 207 00:11:46,333 --> 00:11:48,833 You might be missing Connor. 208 00:11:48,933 --> 00:11:50,933 I know he's been missing you. 209 00:11:51,033 --> 00:11:54,000 Thought you might want to see him. 210 00:11:54,100 --> 00:11:56,533 So you and Joe? 211 00:11:56,633 --> 00:11:59,567 This is about me and you. 212 00:11:59,667 --> 00:12:03,667 Joe told me Connor was his, showed me the DNA results. 213 00:12:03,767 --> 00:12:04,800 Well, they called your bluff. 214 00:12:04,900 --> 00:12:05,967 And if you'd had opened the envelope, 215 00:12:06,067 --> 00:12:09,667 you'd have seen it was a gas bill. 216 00:12:09,767 --> 00:12:11,467 What's going on? 217 00:12:11,567 --> 00:12:12,833 I said I'd kill him, and it meant it, 218 00:12:12,933 --> 00:12:13,867 so why would hey agree to this? 219 00:12:13,967 --> 00:12:15,167 I haven't got time for this. 220 00:12:15,267 --> 00:12:16,400 Offer's on the table. 221 00:12:16,500 --> 00:12:19,933 Call me when you're thinking straight. 222 00:12:20,033 --> 00:12:21,433 You're dumping Connor. 223 00:12:21,533 --> 00:12:23,767 He's found out Connor's mine, fucking cuckoo in the nest 224 00:12:23,867 --> 00:12:25,700 and he wants rid. 225 00:12:25,800 --> 00:12:28,100 Wants to play happy families, have his own kids. 226 00:12:28,200 --> 00:12:29,867 Sends you to sweet talk me so you can offload. 227 00:12:29,967 --> 00:12:30,800 Karen! 228 00:12:38,700 --> 00:12:42,033 I said I'd kill you if I ever saw you again! 229 00:12:42,133 --> 00:12:44,600 It's not him! 230 00:12:44,700 --> 00:12:46,200 It's not him! 231 00:12:53,933 --> 00:12:56,733 Oh, it's not another fucking Doctor Who convention, is it, 232 00:12:56,833 --> 00:12:57,767 Lillian? 233 00:12:57,867 --> 00:12:59,067 No, why? 234 00:12:59,167 --> 00:13:01,600 It's just, after tickets. 235 00:13:04,600 --> 00:13:05,433 Hey. 236 00:13:05,533 --> 00:13:07,300 Oh, can't get a minute's peace. 237 00:13:07,400 --> 00:13:08,967 What is it? 238 00:13:09,067 --> 00:13:10,433 I'm sorry. 239 00:13:10,533 --> 00:13:12,133 I'm so, so sorry. 240 00:13:12,233 --> 00:13:15,800 All I'm after is a quiet fucking pint with the lads, 241 00:13:15,900 --> 00:13:18,833 and in she walks. 242 00:13:18,933 --> 00:13:19,767 It's Debbie. 243 00:13:22,567 --> 00:13:24,733 She's been killed in Afghanistan. 244 00:13:24,833 --> 00:13:25,733 [music playing] 245 00:13:51,533 --> 00:13:53,900 Fucking ragheads. 246 00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:56,833 If you need anything Frank. 247 00:13:56,933 --> 00:13:59,733 You could chuck us 40 fags 'til the giro hits my account. 248 00:14:04,200 --> 00:14:06,667 Just need to anaesthetise. 249 00:14:06,767 --> 00:14:09,567 Cheers. - No credit. 250 00:14:09,667 --> 00:14:10,800 Leave it. 251 00:14:10,900 --> 00:14:12,533 You're hemorrhaging profit left, right, and center, 252 00:14:12,633 --> 00:14:13,367 and this is why. 253 00:14:13,467 --> 00:14:14,933 He's just lost his daughter. 254 00:14:15,033 --> 00:14:17,267 And our family will lose the shop if you carry on like this. 255 00:14:17,367 --> 00:14:18,100 Name? 256 00:14:18,200 --> 00:14:19,533 Frank Gallagher. 257 00:14:19,633 --> 00:14:22,267 Frank, 32 pounds and 85p outstanding on your slate, 258 00:14:22,367 --> 00:14:23,500 Gallagher. 259 00:14:23,600 --> 00:14:25,667 Frank, my daughter died defending Queen and country 260 00:14:25,767 --> 00:14:26,800 for the likes of you, Gallagher's 261 00:14:26,900 --> 00:14:28,867 got a bad ring to it, yeah. 262 00:14:28,967 --> 00:14:30,233 Your bang out of order, Sita. 263 00:14:30,333 --> 00:14:32,433 You know what, don't even worry about it, mate. 264 00:14:39,267 --> 00:14:40,667 I'll take over here. 265 00:14:40,767 --> 00:14:41,967 I'm fine. 266 00:14:42,067 --> 00:14:43,933 I know for a fact you haven't slept a wink. 267 00:14:44,033 --> 00:14:47,933 Looking after Liam, Carl, Frank. 268 00:14:48,033 --> 00:14:49,167 Let me look after you. 269 00:14:53,867 --> 00:14:55,033 Beans on toast, do you? 270 00:14:55,133 --> 00:14:56,200 We've nothing in. 271 00:14:56,300 --> 00:14:58,067 Yeah, I'm not that hungry. 272 00:14:58,167 --> 00:15:00,100 You've not had any breakfast. 273 00:15:00,200 --> 00:15:02,133 Got to eat something. 274 00:15:02,233 --> 00:15:03,333 I'll go round the shop. 275 00:15:03,433 --> 00:15:05,033 Liam? 276 00:15:05,133 --> 00:15:06,200 [sniffing] 277 00:15:21,633 --> 00:15:25,567 It's OK, mom's here. 278 00:15:25,667 --> 00:15:30,000 Liam, Carl. 279 00:15:30,100 --> 00:15:31,000 Monica? 280 00:15:31,100 --> 00:15:35,933 Oh, oh, oh! 281 00:15:36,033 --> 00:15:39,167 Frank, our little girl! 282 00:15:39,267 --> 00:15:43,200 Don't worry, I'm here now. 283 00:15:43,300 --> 00:15:45,700 I don't know what came over me. 284 00:15:45,800 --> 00:15:47,733 I'm not the fainting type. 285 00:15:47,833 --> 00:15:48,867 It's the shock. 286 00:15:48,967 --> 00:15:50,300 You've suffered a terrible loss. 287 00:15:50,400 --> 00:15:53,000 And you're God knows how many months up the spout. 288 00:15:53,100 --> 00:15:55,433 My children need me. 289 00:15:55,533 --> 00:15:56,667 You need me. 290 00:16:00,100 --> 00:16:02,367 Could you give us a few moments in private? 291 00:16:06,033 --> 00:16:09,333 Oh, of course. 292 00:16:09,433 --> 00:16:10,267 Sorry. 293 00:16:16,333 --> 00:16:18,367 You heard from Carl? 294 00:16:18,467 --> 00:16:19,100 Texted him. 295 00:16:19,200 --> 00:16:20,633 Not heard back yet. 296 00:16:20,733 --> 00:16:23,833 I think he's best left. 297 00:16:23,933 --> 00:16:25,000 What are you doing here? 298 00:16:25,100 --> 00:16:27,733 Saving you from yourself. 299 00:16:27,833 --> 00:16:31,833 I'd appreciate it if you didn't serve him with alcohol again. 300 00:16:31,933 --> 00:16:32,733 Bird? 301 00:16:32,833 --> 00:16:34,033 Cousin. 302 00:16:34,133 --> 00:16:36,633 Sita, I told granddad I don't need his help. 303 00:16:36,733 --> 00:16:38,667 So you reject his help, but accept his money? 304 00:16:38,767 --> 00:16:40,233 Back off. 305 00:16:40,333 --> 00:16:42,233 As soon as you prove you can behave like the good Muslim boy 306 00:16:42,333 --> 00:16:44,400 I know you to be, I will. 307 00:16:58,833 --> 00:17:02,400 I'll top and tail with mom, Frank can take the couch. 308 00:17:02,500 --> 00:17:04,233 Can't have you cramped in your condition. 309 00:17:04,333 --> 00:17:06,667 Six weeks to go, I can't wait. 310 00:17:06,767 --> 00:17:07,933 Little bundle of love. 311 00:17:08,033 --> 00:17:10,167 Oh, that big bundle of cash. 312 00:17:10,267 --> 00:17:12,600 I'm a surrogate for a gay couple in Oldham 313 00:17:12,700 --> 00:17:15,667 who've got everything they could possibly want, bar kids. 314 00:17:15,767 --> 00:17:17,200 You're going to give it away? 315 00:17:17,300 --> 00:17:20,633 Oh no, I get 18k for him, Ricky Martin. 316 00:17:20,733 --> 00:17:24,067 I haven't formed an emotional attachment. 317 00:17:24,167 --> 00:17:25,033 You got kids? 318 00:17:25,133 --> 00:17:26,567 The timing was never right. 319 00:17:26,667 --> 00:17:29,667 Didn't find a man 'til mother nature withdrew her favors. 320 00:17:29,767 --> 00:17:30,667 Aw. 321 00:17:30,767 --> 00:17:32,567 Career women? - Librarian. 322 00:17:32,667 --> 00:17:35,700 Hardly worth it, was it? 323 00:17:35,800 --> 00:17:37,567 Where'd you meet? 324 00:17:37,667 --> 00:17:42,067 He was in the poetry section, reading Byron, Wordsworth. 325 00:17:42,167 --> 00:17:43,800 "I wandered lonely as a cloud." 326 00:17:43,900 --> 00:17:45,267 In a cloud, if I know Frank. 327 00:17:45,367 --> 00:17:46,633 We had an immediate attraction. 328 00:17:46,733 --> 00:17:48,200 Oh yeah, we had one of them. 329 00:17:48,300 --> 00:17:50,633 I got knocked up in the gents in the Wigan Casino all-nighter. 330 00:17:50,733 --> 00:17:54,733 That's where we made little Fifi, Fiona. 331 00:17:54,833 --> 00:17:56,700 Oh! 332 00:17:56,800 --> 00:17:58,233 Supposed to be in three weeks. 333 00:17:58,333 --> 00:17:59,933 I really don't see how we can go ahead. 334 00:18:00,033 --> 00:18:02,667 Oh, but it's exactly what Debbie would 335 00:18:02,767 --> 00:18:06,000 have wanted, new beginnings. 336 00:18:06,100 --> 00:18:08,067 Oh, you must go ahead. 337 00:18:08,167 --> 00:18:09,167 I don't think Frank-- 338 00:18:09,267 --> 00:18:11,533 I know how to get around Frank. 339 00:18:11,633 --> 00:18:12,700 You leave him to me. 340 00:18:24,933 --> 00:18:25,767 Usual, Monica? 341 00:18:28,333 --> 00:18:31,467 In my state, just a single. 342 00:18:35,333 --> 00:18:37,167 Oh. 343 00:18:37,267 --> 00:18:39,700 Debbie would have loved that. 344 00:18:39,800 --> 00:18:41,133 Except for the flowers. 345 00:18:41,233 --> 00:18:42,933 She weren't big on lilies. 346 00:18:43,033 --> 00:18:44,167 On the house. 347 00:18:44,267 --> 00:18:45,800 Sorry for your loss. 348 00:18:45,900 --> 00:18:46,700 Thanks, Jamie. 349 00:18:57,400 --> 00:18:59,900 To Debbie. 350 00:19:00,000 --> 00:19:01,067 [crying] 351 00:19:12,300 --> 00:19:14,967 It's our little girl. 352 00:19:15,067 --> 00:19:16,633 It's our Debbie. 353 00:19:16,733 --> 00:19:20,933 Please, Frank, don't. 354 00:19:21,033 --> 00:19:22,500 We had a whip-round. 355 00:19:22,600 --> 00:19:23,767 The wake's on us. 356 00:19:23,867 --> 00:19:26,200 Food, booze. 357 00:19:26,300 --> 00:19:28,233 Oh that's such comfort. 358 00:19:32,133 --> 00:19:35,100 Debbie wouldn't have wanted this. 359 00:19:35,200 --> 00:19:36,800 All these miserable faces. 360 00:19:40,200 --> 00:19:42,467 Let's celebrate her life, eh? 361 00:19:42,567 --> 00:19:43,400 [crying] 362 00:19:45,300 --> 00:19:47,000 Drinks for everyone! 363 00:19:47,100 --> 00:19:47,900 [cheering] 364 00:19:48,000 --> 00:19:49,700 A toast! 365 00:19:49,800 --> 00:19:51,833 For Debbie! 366 00:19:51,933 --> 00:19:54,000 It's not that we can't afford it, 367 00:19:54,100 --> 00:19:56,600 I've got some cash coming my way. 368 00:20:03,067 --> 00:20:04,133 Cilla's out like a light. 369 00:20:04,233 --> 00:20:09,600 [snoring sound] 370 00:20:09,700 --> 00:20:10,500 You OK? 371 00:20:13,067 --> 00:20:14,933 Feel like shit. 372 00:20:15,033 --> 00:20:16,967 Exhausted with it all. 373 00:20:17,067 --> 00:20:18,300 Mam, don't be embarrassed. 374 00:20:18,400 --> 00:20:19,967 When me and your dad separated, 375 00:20:20,067 --> 00:20:24,333 I did anything and everything to get some sense of self-worth, 376 00:20:24,433 --> 00:20:29,567 to prove to myself that I was still attractive, desirable. 377 00:20:34,800 --> 00:20:37,033 I think you're lovely. 378 00:20:37,133 --> 00:20:38,600 Even in the light. 379 00:20:38,700 --> 00:20:41,467 A beauty all your own. 380 00:20:41,567 --> 00:20:42,767 Do you think? 381 00:20:42,867 --> 00:20:45,267 Yeah. 382 00:20:45,367 --> 00:20:48,333 And once you get past the accent and that, 383 00:20:48,433 --> 00:20:50,400 you always reminded me a bit of Dawn French. 384 00:20:50,500 --> 00:20:53,400 Fucking hell, Mickey, she's twice the size of me. 385 00:20:53,500 --> 00:20:54,800 But gorgeous. 386 00:20:54,900 --> 00:20:57,033 When Cilla asks me where Dad is, 387 00:20:57,133 --> 00:20:59,400 I want to be able to tell her. 388 00:20:59,500 --> 00:21:02,033 I want to look her in the eye and give her his name. 389 00:21:05,400 --> 00:21:09,100 Must thing I'm some kind of slut. 390 00:21:09,200 --> 00:21:12,867 Mam, I'm a 21st century type of guy. 391 00:21:12,967 --> 00:21:15,767 I've probably slept with more than that on a busy weekend. 392 00:21:15,867 --> 00:21:17,400 You know, birds, obviously. 393 00:21:17,500 --> 00:21:18,767 Tits and stuff. 394 00:21:18,867 --> 00:21:19,700 Flange. 395 00:21:34,733 --> 00:21:39,300 Tell her Dad was the most handsome man you'd ever met. 396 00:21:39,400 --> 00:21:40,833 Yeah, he was here on a fact-finding trip 397 00:21:40,933 --> 00:21:44,600 from the states, something to do with housing policy, 398 00:21:44,700 --> 00:21:48,500 under a directive from Baracks Obama. 399 00:21:48,600 --> 00:21:51,167 You fell for his manly charms, the way 400 00:21:51,267 --> 00:21:54,700 his muscles strained against the pure white cotton of his shirt. 401 00:21:54,800 --> 00:21:59,533 You had one night of love, and Cilla was born from that love. 402 00:21:59,633 --> 00:22:01,600 Months later he found out you was up the spout. 403 00:22:01,700 --> 00:22:04,167 He was on his way back, died in a plane crash. 404 00:22:04,267 --> 00:22:06,267 Do you reckon she'll buy that? 405 00:22:06,367 --> 00:22:07,167 Yeah. 406 00:22:14,100 --> 00:22:15,600 [music playing] 407 00:22:20,267 --> 00:22:22,067 Silver lining for your black cloud. 408 00:22:25,167 --> 00:22:26,733 [MUSIC - BETTE MIDLER, "WIND BENEATH MY WINGS"] 409 00:22:26,833 --> 00:22:29,533 Ever know that you're my hero. 410 00:22:33,067 --> 00:22:36,767 Everything I would like to be. 411 00:22:36,867 --> 00:22:38,467 This is just a warm-up. 412 00:22:38,567 --> 00:22:42,200 When we have the real wake, we'll give our Debbie 413 00:22:42,300 --> 00:22:44,767 one hell of a send-off. 414 00:22:44,867 --> 00:22:49,700 We'll give her a celebration she'll never forget. 415 00:22:49,800 --> 00:22:52,067 We'll never forget. 416 00:22:52,167 --> 00:22:53,033 [laughing] 417 00:22:53,133 --> 00:22:54,400 What are you having? 418 00:22:54,500 --> 00:22:58,100 Jamie, a drink for the future Mrs. Gallagher. 419 00:22:58,200 --> 00:22:59,733 No, I'm fine, thanks. 420 00:22:59,833 --> 00:23:00,633 Sure? 421 00:23:01,733 --> 00:23:03,533 Don't worry, he's safe. 422 00:23:03,633 --> 00:23:05,733 It's just that we've got a past, me and him. 423 00:23:05,833 --> 00:23:06,933 Past? 424 00:23:07,033 --> 00:23:09,600 I gave him the best years of my life. 425 00:23:09,700 --> 00:23:10,667 Twice. 426 00:23:10,767 --> 00:23:13,033 He's all yours, Libby. 427 00:23:13,133 --> 00:23:16,467 My heart belongs to another. 428 00:23:16,567 --> 00:23:18,467 My civil partner. 429 00:23:18,567 --> 00:23:19,433 I'm gay. 430 00:23:19,533 --> 00:23:21,767 Got married in a posh tent in Devon. 431 00:23:21,867 --> 00:23:22,933 You shocked? 432 00:23:23,033 --> 00:23:24,100 I was just wondering if-- 433 00:23:24,200 --> 00:23:25,833 I'm so, so sorry. 434 00:23:25,933 --> 00:23:28,133 It's terrible when children die before you. 435 00:23:28,233 --> 00:23:30,233 Not nature's way. 436 00:23:30,333 --> 00:23:32,633 You have never lost a kid. 437 00:23:32,733 --> 00:23:36,433 I might as well have lost my Rodney for all the use he is. 438 00:23:36,533 --> 00:23:38,767 Oh. 439 00:23:38,867 --> 00:23:39,867 I was just wondering when you'd 440 00:23:39,967 --> 00:23:41,033 be coming back to the house. 441 00:23:41,133 --> 00:23:43,633 It's Liam, he needs his mom. 442 00:23:43,733 --> 00:23:46,067 He needs you there. 443 00:23:46,167 --> 00:23:48,700 So I'm a bad mother now. 444 00:23:48,800 --> 00:23:50,167 No, no. 445 00:23:50,267 --> 00:23:53,033 Someone who can't even produce a child their own, 446 00:23:53,133 --> 00:23:54,667 calling me a bad mother! 447 00:23:54,767 --> 00:23:55,967 That's not what I said! 448 00:23:56,067 --> 00:23:58,533 Here's me grieving, and she's telling me 449 00:23:58,633 --> 00:24:00,467 that I'm a bad mother. 450 00:24:00,567 --> 00:24:01,433 I didn't. 451 00:24:01,533 --> 00:24:02,533 I didn't say that. 452 00:24:02,633 --> 00:24:06,600 Fuck's sake, Libby, show some sensitivity. 453 00:24:06,700 --> 00:24:10,200 You should be helping instead of hindering. 454 00:24:10,300 --> 00:24:12,767 It's all right, it's OK. 455 00:24:15,500 --> 00:24:16,300 Oh! 456 00:24:20,133 --> 00:24:21,033 About before. 457 00:24:21,133 --> 00:24:23,867 The less from you, the better. 458 00:24:23,967 --> 00:24:25,567 You need to lie down, kid. 459 00:24:25,667 --> 00:24:27,133 You're exhausted. 460 00:24:27,233 --> 00:24:30,700 That baby will come out pie-eyed. 461 00:24:30,800 --> 00:24:32,267 Should be ashamed of herself. 462 00:24:32,367 --> 00:24:35,533 Everyone deals with grief in different ways. 463 00:24:35,633 --> 00:24:38,633 And getting pissed and moving back in with their ex is hers, 464 00:24:38,733 --> 00:24:40,900 I suppose? 465 00:24:41,000 --> 00:24:42,733 I thought you were cleverer than that. 466 00:24:46,633 --> 00:24:51,333 Your aura's all wrong, for a soon-to-be married man. 467 00:24:51,433 --> 00:24:56,900 Oh, that'll be the small matter of losing our daughter. 468 00:24:57,000 --> 00:24:59,133 Don't grieve, love. 469 00:24:59,233 --> 00:25:02,300 She's on a higher plane. 470 00:25:02,400 --> 00:25:06,133 I studied under a Reiki master in Glastonbury. 471 00:25:06,233 --> 00:25:08,300 Three months in a year. 472 00:25:11,000 --> 00:25:14,467 Your Kundalini needs raising. 473 00:25:14,567 --> 00:25:18,933 Your chakras can't function properly. 474 00:25:19,033 --> 00:25:20,633 Oh, I feel for you. 475 00:25:20,733 --> 00:25:24,733 There is nothing wrong with me other than the obvious. 476 00:25:27,567 --> 00:25:29,533 You're in denial. 477 00:25:29,633 --> 00:25:34,600 Spirits battling-- am I doing the right thing? 478 00:25:34,700 --> 00:25:38,600 If you mean Libby, I am doing the right thing. 479 00:25:43,033 --> 00:25:44,633 Someone needs to tell Fiona. 480 00:25:44,733 --> 00:25:45,933 Then call her. 481 00:25:46,033 --> 00:25:47,467 It's not something you can do over the phone. 482 00:25:47,567 --> 00:25:48,200 She'll be upset. 483 00:25:48,300 --> 00:25:49,533 Need family with her. 484 00:25:49,633 --> 00:25:52,133 She's got a husband. 485 00:25:52,233 --> 00:25:53,433 I'll call you when I get there. 486 00:25:53,533 --> 00:25:55,967 Then me and Fiona can drive over and see Lip. 487 00:25:56,067 --> 00:25:58,033 There's no way I can let you leave. 488 00:25:58,133 --> 00:26:00,333 You can't stop me. 489 00:26:00,433 --> 00:26:02,533 Wait there, I'll fetch your mom and dad. 490 00:26:02,633 --> 00:26:04,567 [music playing] 491 00:26:04,667 --> 00:26:05,467 Liam's-- 492 00:26:09,900 --> 00:26:12,800 Oh no. 493 00:26:12,900 --> 00:26:13,733 Fuck. 494 00:26:18,333 --> 00:26:19,200 Lib? 495 00:26:19,300 --> 00:26:22,000 Oh! 496 00:26:22,100 --> 00:26:23,533 It wasn't how it looked! 497 00:26:23,633 --> 00:26:25,867 Her on her knees, you with your trousers 498 00:26:25,967 --> 00:26:26,967 'round your ankles? 499 00:26:27,067 --> 00:26:28,533 Libby, she was just trying it on. 500 00:26:28,633 --> 00:26:30,733 You know, Indian head massages, she was 501 00:26:30,833 --> 00:26:32,533 trying to raise me diphthong. 502 00:26:32,633 --> 00:26:33,967 You've got cold feet. 503 00:26:34,067 --> 00:26:36,333 Been having second thoughts, it's obvious! 504 00:26:36,433 --> 00:26:38,500 I've been having them ever since we named the day. 505 00:26:41,467 --> 00:26:42,300 Fuck. 506 00:26:45,100 --> 00:26:46,700 I've been thinking about me track record, 507 00:26:46,800 --> 00:26:49,433 and whether I've got the stamina for another stab at matrimony. 508 00:26:49,533 --> 00:26:53,200 And the fact that I'm still here says yes, says I still 509 00:26:53,300 --> 00:26:56,500 want to marry you, doesn't it? 510 00:26:56,600 --> 00:26:57,500 I don't know. 511 00:27:02,533 --> 00:27:03,833 Nothing happened. 512 00:27:03,933 --> 00:27:07,000 And if you don't believe that, let's call the whole thing off. 513 00:27:19,767 --> 00:27:22,033 I owe you an apology. 514 00:27:22,133 --> 00:27:25,533 I was rude, insensitive. 515 00:27:25,633 --> 00:27:32,367 Obviously I didn't know, and I'm sorry. 516 00:27:32,467 --> 00:27:33,300 Cheers. 517 00:27:36,100 --> 00:27:39,100 How about you buy me a drink sometime? 518 00:27:39,200 --> 00:27:40,633 Make up for it? 519 00:27:40,733 --> 00:27:43,433 I don't drink. 520 00:27:43,533 --> 00:27:44,733 I'm Muslim. 521 00:27:44,833 --> 00:27:48,167 Are you not supposed to drink? 522 00:27:48,267 --> 00:27:51,100 How about something to eat, then? 523 00:27:51,200 --> 00:27:52,133 Muslims eat, don't they? 524 00:27:52,233 --> 00:27:53,533 It's been known. 525 00:27:53,633 --> 00:27:56,267 Chinese buffet in town, all you can eat for a fiver. 526 00:28:04,300 --> 00:28:06,100 Can't blame a man for trying, can you, Ches? 527 00:28:06,200 --> 00:28:07,933 Do yourself a favor, mate. 528 00:28:08,033 --> 00:28:09,133 Don't go there. 529 00:28:09,233 --> 00:28:10,633 She's more trouble than she's worth. 530 00:28:10,733 --> 00:28:12,067 You'll never change him. 531 00:28:12,167 --> 00:28:14,233 Two previous wives failed miserably, 532 00:28:14,333 --> 00:28:16,967 and you've got nothing they weren't equipped with. 533 00:28:17,067 --> 00:28:19,967 It's time to admit defeat, surrender. 534 00:28:20,067 --> 00:28:21,400 There's no shame in it. 535 00:28:24,600 --> 00:28:26,900 You want to be with me? 536 00:28:27,000 --> 00:28:28,267 Say it. 537 00:28:28,367 --> 00:28:30,200 I want to be with you. 538 00:28:34,933 --> 00:28:38,000 Say it again. 539 00:28:38,100 --> 00:28:40,933 I want to be with you. 540 00:28:41,033 --> 00:28:43,267 I want to marry you. 541 00:28:43,367 --> 00:28:44,033 Prove it. 542 00:28:44,133 --> 00:28:45,133 [music playing] 543 00:28:50,067 --> 00:28:51,333 It's a start. 544 00:28:51,433 --> 00:28:53,233 Anyway, as soon as Milly's here in the morning, 545 00:28:53,333 --> 00:28:54,733 I'll be gone. - Good. 546 00:28:58,500 --> 00:29:01,033 That's my house, you old bitch! 547 00:29:04,267 --> 00:29:05,333 Stopped being your house when you 548 00:29:05,433 --> 00:29:07,733 walked out, the second time. 549 00:29:07,833 --> 00:29:10,767 Oh, give it a bloody rest, Liam. 550 00:29:10,867 --> 00:29:12,033 I had to go. 551 00:29:12,133 --> 00:29:13,500 This place was killing me, and you know it. 552 00:29:13,600 --> 00:29:14,700 Why did you come back? 553 00:29:14,800 --> 00:29:17,167 For you, and Carl. 554 00:29:17,267 --> 00:29:18,733 Your sister's dead. 555 00:29:18,833 --> 00:29:20,033 Why did you really come back? 556 00:29:20,133 --> 00:29:21,800 I'm your mother, isn't that reason enough? 557 00:29:21,900 --> 00:29:23,767 No. 558 00:29:23,867 --> 00:29:25,100 Anyway, what's between your dad 559 00:29:25,200 --> 00:29:27,367 and me is above right and wrong. 560 00:29:27,467 --> 00:29:29,367 No, not now! 561 00:29:29,467 --> 00:29:31,867 Someone's trying to get through. 562 00:29:31,967 --> 00:29:32,867 Away! 563 00:29:32,967 --> 00:29:33,767 Away! 564 00:29:33,867 --> 00:29:35,400 Get away from me! 565 00:29:35,500 --> 00:29:36,400 [music playing] 566 00:29:48,133 --> 00:29:49,567 [crying in next room] 567 00:29:57,567 --> 00:29:58,800 She came to me. 568 00:29:58,900 --> 00:30:00,767 Debbie came to me. 569 00:30:00,867 --> 00:30:02,200 She can't rest. 570 00:30:02,300 --> 00:30:04,133 She was holding a dress, a wedding dress, 571 00:30:04,233 --> 00:30:07,100 and she was shaking her head. 572 00:30:07,200 --> 00:30:09,300 Came to you in a dream, as opposed 573 00:30:09,400 --> 00:30:11,633 to you just having a dream? 574 00:30:11,733 --> 00:30:14,600 You won't stifle my spirit with your cynicism. 575 00:30:14,700 --> 00:30:17,500 I've had visitations in the past, all proved true. 576 00:30:17,600 --> 00:30:21,033 A coalition government, collapse of the banking system, 577 00:30:21,133 --> 00:30:22,933 Dannii Minogue's pregnancy. 578 00:30:23,033 --> 00:30:24,867 Her spirit's in torment. 579 00:30:24,967 --> 00:30:28,667 She can't pass over until she's healed. 580 00:30:28,767 --> 00:30:30,900 Only you can heal her, Frank. 581 00:30:31,000 --> 00:30:33,333 You have the power. 582 00:30:33,433 --> 00:30:34,300 [phone ringing] 583 00:30:38,500 --> 00:30:41,600 We've got to focus, concentrate. 584 00:30:41,700 --> 00:30:42,800 Can you switch your phones off? 585 00:30:42,900 --> 00:30:44,033 What's going on, mom? 586 00:30:44,133 --> 00:30:45,633 Just clearing the channels. 587 00:30:45,733 --> 00:30:49,000 She's trying to come through. 588 00:30:49,100 --> 00:30:50,133 [phone ringing] 589 00:30:54,000 --> 00:30:54,933 It's bad spirits. 590 00:30:55,033 --> 00:30:55,867 [tapping] 591 00:30:55,967 --> 00:30:57,433 Out! 592 00:30:57,533 --> 00:30:58,867 Out! 593 00:30:58,967 --> 00:30:59,800 Out! 594 00:30:59,900 --> 00:31:00,767 [phone shutting down] 595 00:31:00,867 --> 00:31:01,967 [banging] 596 00:31:02,067 --> 00:31:03,067 [knocking] 597 00:31:04,733 --> 00:31:06,100 She says she's been trying to call you, 598 00:31:06,200 --> 00:31:07,700 but there's something wrong with your phones. 599 00:31:07,800 --> 00:31:08,667 Eh? 600 00:31:08,767 --> 00:31:09,567 Debbie. 601 00:31:13,667 --> 00:31:16,533 She's alive. 602 00:31:16,633 --> 00:31:18,533 Alive! 603 00:31:18,633 --> 00:31:19,533 [fireworks] 604 00:31:29,800 --> 00:31:31,267 Don't be waiting for a wedding invitation. 605 00:31:31,367 --> 00:31:33,767 You won't be invited. 606 00:31:33,867 --> 00:31:36,033 He'll let you down. 607 00:31:36,133 --> 00:31:40,600 It might take months, might take years. 608 00:31:40,700 --> 00:31:43,500 Probably take weeks. 609 00:31:43,600 --> 00:31:44,767 But he'll let you down. 610 00:31:54,733 --> 00:31:58,033 | was just a joke that got out of hand. 611 00:31:58,133 --> 00:31:59,367 You knew what you were doing, mom. 612 00:31:59,467 --> 00:32:03,333 I find out our marriage is over in a letter. 613 00:32:03,433 --> 00:32:04,133 A letter! 614 00:32:04,233 --> 00:32:05,467 You brought it on yourself. 615 00:32:05,567 --> 00:32:06,400 Abandonment! 616 00:32:06,500 --> 00:32:07,233 Phone. 617 00:32:07,333 --> 00:32:09,167 I never even had him to abandon. 618 00:32:09,267 --> 00:32:11,833 He always had something more interesting to occupy himself 619 00:32:11,933 --> 00:32:13,867 with than me or his kids. 620 00:32:13,967 --> 00:32:17,333 I just wanted to hurt him like he hurt me. 621 00:32:17,433 --> 00:32:19,967 So you tell him Debbie's dead to hurt him. 622 00:32:20,067 --> 00:32:20,900 All right, so I was wrong. 623 00:32:21,000 --> 00:32:22,700 Naughty mommy. 624 00:32:22,800 --> 00:32:24,333 You hurt the rest of us, too. 625 00:32:24,433 --> 00:32:27,100 How dare he be so fucking happy! 626 00:32:31,433 --> 00:32:34,367 I've got 18 grand coming my way. 627 00:32:34,467 --> 00:32:35,933 Come with me. 628 00:32:36,033 --> 00:32:37,833 No. 629 00:32:37,933 --> 00:32:39,567 Disneyland. 630 00:32:39,667 --> 00:32:41,267 Florida, not the shit one. 631 00:32:44,467 --> 00:32:45,267 All right. 632 00:32:45,367 --> 00:32:46,267 You better be off, then. 633 00:32:46,367 --> 00:32:48,233 I'll wait until the bus comes. 634 00:32:48,333 --> 00:32:50,233 It'll only make it worse. 635 00:32:50,333 --> 00:32:52,700 Anyway, your dad will need you. 636 00:32:52,800 --> 00:32:54,167 He'll be all right. 637 00:32:54,267 --> 00:32:55,533 Stag night should sort him out. 638 00:32:55,633 --> 00:32:56,967 Stag night? 639 00:32:57,067 --> 00:32:58,233 Tonight. 640 00:32:58,333 --> 00:32:59,167 Bye. 641 00:33:04,967 --> 00:33:06,467 [music playing] 642 00:33:27,533 --> 00:33:28,867 Jackson! 643 00:33:28,967 --> 00:33:30,600 Stag do, tonight? 644 00:33:30,700 --> 00:33:31,733 Sorry, I'm busy, Carl. 645 00:33:31,833 --> 00:33:32,967 Relatives coming. 646 00:33:33,067 --> 00:33:34,200 Lockdown! 647 00:33:34,300 --> 00:33:36,533 Forgot to tell you, they've cancelled. 648 00:33:36,633 --> 00:33:39,100 He'll be there. 649 00:33:39,200 --> 00:33:41,200 Fuck did you do that for? 650 00:33:41,300 --> 00:33:43,033 Because it's the third time you've been asked, 651 00:33:43,133 --> 00:33:44,300 and the third time you've said no. 652 00:33:44,400 --> 00:33:46,533 What have I got in common with any of them? 653 00:33:46,633 --> 00:33:49,033 Football, politics, and I'm sure one or two of them 654 00:33:49,133 --> 00:33:50,500 might have even heard of Martin Luther King, 655 00:33:50,600 --> 00:33:52,867 and swung their pants to Bob Marley in their time. 656 00:33:52,967 --> 00:33:54,233 You think this is about color. 657 00:33:54,333 --> 00:33:56,700 No, I think it's about you being 658 00:33:56,800 --> 00:34:00,633 an uptight conceited tosspot with a superiority complex. 659 00:34:00,733 --> 00:34:04,767 You're a trainee teacher, not a fucking Nobel Prize winner. 660 00:34:04,867 --> 00:34:06,933 And if we've got any chance of fitting in 'round here, 661 00:34:07,033 --> 00:34:08,267 you'd do well to remember that. 662 00:34:11,000 --> 00:34:13,833 I am not having a stag do. 663 00:34:13,933 --> 00:34:16,133 But we need to celebrate. 664 00:34:16,233 --> 00:34:17,833 Liam's coming as well to keep an eye on him. 665 00:34:17,933 --> 00:34:19,967 Someone's gotta make sure he gets home in one piece, 666 00:34:20,067 --> 00:34:20,900 and it ain't gonna be me. 667 00:34:21,000 --> 00:34:22,033 No, no, no, no. 668 00:34:22,133 --> 00:34:23,767 We need to a theme. 669 00:34:23,867 --> 00:34:26,067 Come as your favorite blonde. 670 00:34:26,167 --> 00:34:29,500 Marilyn, Madonna, Hulk Hogan. 671 00:34:29,600 --> 00:34:30,267 Elvis. 672 00:34:30,367 --> 00:34:32,067 Oh I'm liking that one. 673 00:34:32,167 --> 00:34:34,300 Young Elvis, old Elvis, fat Elvis. 674 00:34:34,400 --> 00:34:35,267 Dead Elvis. 675 00:34:35,367 --> 00:34:37,600 I am not fucking dressing for anyone. 676 00:34:37,700 --> 00:34:40,433 Which means there's only one thing for it then. 677 00:34:40,533 --> 00:34:41,433 [music playing] 678 00:34:53,267 --> 00:34:54,667 Jackson, voddie chaser? 679 00:34:54,767 --> 00:34:56,467 Bit early, cheers, Jamie. 680 00:34:56,567 --> 00:34:57,400 Half a lager will do me. 681 00:34:57,500 --> 00:34:58,633 Good call, mate. 682 00:35:09,500 --> 00:35:10,367 Where's Frank's? 683 00:35:17,167 --> 00:35:19,600 That's more like it, baby. 684 00:35:40,100 --> 00:35:42,000 Open them legs! 685 00:35:42,100 --> 00:35:43,633 Fuckin' have some of that! 686 00:35:43,733 --> 00:35:44,567 Ooh, ooh, ooh! 687 00:36:03,633 --> 00:36:04,933 Get up, lad! 688 00:36:05,033 --> 00:36:06,933 Get up, lad! 689 00:36:07,033 --> 00:36:08,933 Party games! 690 00:36:09,033 --> 00:36:09,933 Oh, fuck that. 691 00:36:10,033 --> 00:36:11,033 How old do you think I am? 692 00:36:11,133 --> 00:36:12,100 [yelling] 693 00:36:15,033 --> 00:36:16,500 Bouncy castle! 694 00:36:16,600 --> 00:36:17,500 [cheering] 695 00:36:20,600 --> 00:36:22,100 Don't be shy! 696 00:36:27,433 --> 00:36:30,900 Pin the tail on the donkey. 697 00:36:31,000 --> 00:36:32,500 [cheering] 698 00:36:32,600 --> 00:36:33,500 [music playing] 699 00:36:55,533 --> 00:37:01,333 [chanting] 700 00:37:01,433 --> 00:37:06,133 You know, to say I was not looking forward to tonight 701 00:37:06,233 --> 00:37:07,667 is an understatement. 702 00:37:07,767 --> 00:37:09,167 Obviously. 703 00:37:09,267 --> 00:37:13,533 It has been fucking montu-fucking-mental! 704 00:37:13,633 --> 00:37:15,033 For 705 00:37:15,133 --> 00:37:16,300 Yeah, baby! 706 00:37:19,400 --> 00:37:25,200 It's times like this when you know who your real friends are? 707 00:37:25,300 --> 00:37:29,367 Aw, we love you too, Frank. 708 00:37:29,467 --> 00:37:32,233 Carl, your dad's getting all emotional. 709 00:37:32,333 --> 00:37:34,267 Friends, brothers in arms, you know. 710 00:37:34,367 --> 00:37:37,433 Who cares, you know, who's willing to go that extra mile. 711 00:37:37,533 --> 00:37:38,667 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 712 00:37:38,767 --> 00:37:41,400 I think that's going a bit too far, actually, mate. 713 00:37:41,500 --> 00:37:42,367 [yelling] 714 00:37:46,167 --> 00:37:47,600 Fuck right off! 715 00:37:47,700 --> 00:37:50,000 Have a great night's sleep! 716 00:37:50,100 --> 00:37:51,100 Bastards! 717 00:37:54,433 --> 00:37:56,633 You bast-- Liam! 718 00:37:56,733 --> 00:37:59,600 Liam! 719 00:37:59,700 --> 00:38:01,567 Liam! 720 00:38:01,667 --> 00:38:03,967 Liam! 721 00:38:04,067 --> 00:38:05,033 [howling] 722 00:38:08,267 --> 00:38:10,200 You look like shit, mimi. 723 00:38:10,300 --> 00:38:12,033 And And you sell your fanny for a living, 724 00:38:12,133 --> 00:38:13,867 but do you hear me going on about that? 725 00:38:13,967 --> 00:38:16,900 What was it exactly they were arrested for? 726 00:38:17,000 --> 00:38:25,133 [MUSIC - VANGELIS, "CHARIOTS OF FIRE"] 727 00:38:26,000 --> 00:38:27,033 [yelling] 728 00:38:32,967 --> 00:38:34,533 So did Frank behave himself? 729 00:38:34,633 --> 00:38:35,900 I made sure it. 730 00:38:36,000 --> 00:38:37,733 Home, please, now. 731 00:38:37,833 --> 00:38:39,400 Sorry? 732 00:38:39,500 --> 00:38:41,700 She's due a feed in an hour. 733 00:38:41,800 --> 00:38:42,633 Good night? 734 00:38:42,733 --> 00:38:44,233 It was all right. 735 00:38:44,333 --> 00:38:46,333 Wouldn't have bothered if you hadn't pushed me. 736 00:38:46,433 --> 00:38:48,700 Fry up back at home, Carl. 737 00:38:48,800 --> 00:38:51,033 Vitamin C, and a darkened room. 738 00:38:52,900 --> 00:38:53,733 Morning. 739 00:39:00,433 --> 00:39:01,233 Wait! 740 00:39:04,567 --> 00:39:05,400 Where's Frank? 741 00:39:10,733 --> 00:39:14,700 It was a night of revelry, high spirits. 742 00:39:14,800 --> 00:39:20,033 All I want to know is, where is he? 743 00:39:20,133 --> 00:39:22,167 Will you please take this seriously? 744 00:39:22,267 --> 00:39:24,000 Frank is missing. 745 00:39:24,100 --> 00:39:26,167 The man I intend to marry has disappeared, 746 00:39:26,267 --> 00:39:28,333 and I need to know where he's got to. 747 00:39:28,433 --> 00:39:31,633 Off dipping his wick somewhere it's not wanted, 748 00:39:31,733 --> 00:39:33,733 spilling his seed. 749 00:39:33,833 --> 00:39:36,133 Look, we're sorry, we really can't remember much. 750 00:39:36,233 --> 00:39:38,800 Where did you see him last? 751 00:39:38,900 --> 00:39:41,933 Before we proceed, I think Liam should leave the room, 752 00:39:42,033 --> 00:39:42,933 this could get ugly. 753 00:39:43,033 --> 00:39:44,967 He's fine with ugly. 754 00:39:45,067 --> 00:39:46,467 That brass was a right minger, wasn't she? 755 00:39:50,800 --> 00:39:51,700 [music playing] 756 00:39:59,033 --> 00:40:01,033 A prostitute? 757 00:40:01,133 --> 00:40:02,033 No offense. 758 00:40:02,133 --> 00:40:03,167 None taken. 759 00:40:03,267 --> 00:40:05,133 Even I draw the line at prepubescent! 760 00:40:05,233 --> 00:40:06,933 And whose bright idea was that? 761 00:40:07,033 --> 00:40:09,133 What were you doing in a brothel? 762 00:40:09,233 --> 00:40:11,500 You weren't treating Frank to anything, were you? 763 00:40:11,600 --> 00:40:13,433 No, he weren't there then, he'd left. 764 00:40:13,533 --> 00:40:14,333 Left? 765 00:40:14,433 --> 00:40:15,500 You let him go. 766 00:40:15,600 --> 00:40:16,467 On his own? 767 00:40:16,567 --> 00:40:17,600 Libby, we were pissed. 768 00:40:20,333 --> 00:40:22,733 What those men did-- 769 00:40:22,833 --> 00:40:25,133 call them men. 770 00:40:25,233 --> 00:40:26,700 Your first time only happens once, 771 00:40:26,800 --> 00:40:29,100 and it shouldn't happen at the age of 12, shoved into a room 772 00:40:29,200 --> 00:40:31,400 with a woman old enough to be your mother. 773 00:40:31,500 --> 00:40:32,233 She's was 18. 774 00:40:32,333 --> 00:40:33,367 I don't know if that's worse. 775 00:40:36,067 --> 00:40:38,567 We didn't do it. 776 00:40:38,667 --> 00:40:42,167 You mean you're intacto? 777 00:40:42,267 --> 00:40:45,933 I'm not sure that term applies to the male of the species. 778 00:40:46,033 --> 00:40:48,000 I gave her money for her time, won it back 779 00:40:48,100 --> 00:40:50,133 in the game of three-card brag. 780 00:40:50,233 --> 00:40:54,400 Kept enough for a fish supper and a cab home. 781 00:40:54,500 --> 00:40:57,200 When was the last time you saw him? 782 00:40:57,300 --> 00:41:00,533 Think, Liam, please. 783 00:41:00,633 --> 00:41:03,533 In the cemetery. 784 00:41:03,633 --> 00:41:04,933 He'll be all right. 785 00:41:05,033 --> 00:41:07,833 I know he will be. 786 00:41:07,933 --> 00:41:09,767 [music playing] 787 00:41:09,867 --> 00:41:12,433 Yeah. 788 00:41:12,533 --> 00:41:13,333 No. 789 00:41:13,433 --> 00:41:14,833 Yeah, but no. 790 00:41:14,933 --> 00:41:17,100 But it can't be yeah but no. 791 00:41:17,200 --> 00:41:18,567 You either saw him or you didn't. 792 00:41:18,667 --> 00:41:21,633 It was someone like that, but black. 793 00:41:21,733 --> 00:41:24,167 This guy was dressed like that, but a dwarf. 794 00:41:24,267 --> 00:41:25,633 No, he was definitely Asian. 795 00:41:25,733 --> 00:41:29,567 He had a terrible problem with saliva, kept dribbling. 796 00:41:36,200 --> 00:41:37,733 These are from Mimi. 797 00:41:37,833 --> 00:41:39,933 You told her we were having Libby's hen do here. 798 00:41:40,033 --> 00:41:40,867 Mm-hmm. 799 00:41:40,967 --> 00:41:41,967 Why? 800 00:41:42,067 --> 00:41:43,400 Because Libby needs cheering up. 801 00:41:43,500 --> 00:41:45,433 And I fancy a bit of female company. 802 00:41:45,533 --> 00:41:46,433 Who's invited? 803 00:41:46,533 --> 00:41:48,067 Plenty more where this came from. 804 00:41:48,167 --> 00:41:49,600 Loads left in the kitty, too. 805 00:41:49,700 --> 00:41:51,900 We can splash what's left on the stripper. 806 00:41:52,000 --> 00:41:53,933 Bit of a busman's holiday for me, Lillian. 807 00:41:54,033 --> 00:41:55,433 No cock, please. 808 00:41:55,533 --> 00:41:59,767 So lager, cider, vodka, mixers, and no cock? 809 00:41:59,867 --> 00:42:01,367 I'll have a cock if it's on offer. 810 00:42:01,467 --> 00:42:02,467 You'll have to bring your own. 811 00:42:02,567 --> 00:42:04,067 Can we not just have a little cock? 812 00:42:04,167 --> 00:42:06,467 Well, the little one's hardly worth having, is it? 813 00:42:09,500 --> 00:42:10,400 [music playing] 814 00:42:11,867 --> 00:42:13,133 Just off to the pub. 815 00:42:13,233 --> 00:42:16,667 Don't do anything I wouldn't do. 816 00:42:16,767 --> 00:42:18,033 Don't rush back. 817 00:42:18,133 --> 00:42:19,400 And ladies! 818 00:42:19,500 --> 00:42:22,433 Sorry, can I just ask you don't touch the vinyl. 819 00:42:22,533 --> 00:42:23,367 Collector's items. 820 00:42:23,467 --> 00:42:25,233 Alphabetized, would you believe? 821 00:42:25,333 --> 00:42:27,667 I would if I knew what it meant. 822 00:42:27,767 --> 00:42:30,467 And I should move this too. 823 00:42:30,567 --> 00:42:32,000 Bloody hell, it looks brewery under here. 824 00:42:32,100 --> 00:42:33,867 Oh, shit! 825 00:42:33,967 --> 00:42:35,233 You've not toasted Libby yet. 826 00:42:35,333 --> 00:42:37,633 And you're not getting out of here until you do. 827 00:42:49,700 --> 00:42:52,867 Put a smile on your face, for everyone's sake, 828 00:42:52,967 --> 00:42:54,133 if not your own. 829 00:42:54,233 --> 00:42:55,800 Something's wrong, mom. 830 00:42:55,900 --> 00:42:57,000 I can feel it. 831 00:42:57,100 --> 00:42:59,167 Liam said he's done this type of thing 832 00:42:59,267 --> 00:43:00,800 a thousand times when he was with Monica. 833 00:43:00,900 --> 00:43:04,200 But he's never done it once while he's been with me. 834 00:43:04,300 --> 00:43:05,767 Maybe he's got cold feet. 835 00:43:05,867 --> 00:43:08,667 There's no maybe about it, the man doesn't want to marry you. 836 00:43:08,767 --> 00:43:10,967 What more does he need to do to convince you? 837 00:43:11,067 --> 00:43:12,867 You're determined to see me unhappy. 838 00:43:12,967 --> 00:43:15,200 I'm determined to make you see sense. 839 00:43:15,300 --> 00:43:17,200 You asked him to prove he loved you, 840 00:43:17,300 --> 00:43:21,400 and he's failed miserably, end of story. 841 00:43:21,500 --> 00:43:22,867 [music - rihanna, "rude boy"] 842 00:43:22,967 --> 00:43:24,867 All right, you don't mind, do you? 843 00:43:24,967 --> 00:43:26,300 The pub was a bit empty. 844 00:43:26,400 --> 00:43:28,333 Food's that way, booze on the table. 845 00:43:28,433 --> 00:43:30,467 Anything could land us in courts in the backyard 846 00:43:30,567 --> 00:43:32,000 and at your own risk. 847 00:43:35,233 --> 00:43:38,633 How many's he had? 848 00:43:38,733 --> 00:43:39,733 One? 849 00:43:39,833 --> 00:43:40,633 Yes, lads! 850 00:43:40,733 --> 00:43:41,867 You made it! 851 00:43:41,967 --> 00:43:42,800 [cheering] 852 00:43:42,900 --> 00:43:43,767 Cheers, Jackson! 853 00:43:43,867 --> 00:43:45,833 I think mum might be right. 854 00:43:45,933 --> 00:43:47,900 Maybe I pushed him too far. 855 00:43:48,000 --> 00:43:50,133 Made too many demands. 856 00:43:50,233 --> 00:43:53,100 Maybe I frightened him off. 857 00:43:53,200 --> 00:43:55,900 Maybe he's sleeping off mother of all hangovers, 858 00:43:56,000 --> 00:44:00,733 and you'll see him bright and bushy-eyed tomorrow morning. 859 00:44:00,833 --> 00:44:02,533 Chill, Libs. 860 00:44:02,633 --> 00:44:04,833 Stress is a killer! 861 00:44:04,933 --> 00:44:06,233 Never happier than when she's got 862 00:44:06,333 --> 00:44:08,667 something to complain about. 863 00:44:08,767 --> 00:44:09,633 [cheering] 864 00:44:10,700 --> 00:44:14,500 Would you look at that? 865 00:44:14,600 --> 00:44:15,900 Terrible behaviour. 866 00:44:16,000 --> 00:44:19,800 Off, off, off, off off off! 867 00:44:19,900 --> 00:44:20,867 Off! Off! 868 00:44:20,967 --> 00:44:21,867 Off! Off! 869 00:44:21,967 --> 00:44:22,800 Off! Off! 870 00:44:22,900 --> 00:44:23,733 Off! 871 00:44:23,833 --> 00:44:24,667 Off! 872 00:44:24,767 --> 00:44:27,833 What is it you're on, Mimi? 873 00:44:27,933 --> 00:44:29,067 Off! Off! 874 00:44:29,167 --> 00:44:30,067 Off! Off! 875 00:44:30,167 --> 00:44:31,233 Off! Off! 876 00:44:31,333 --> 00:44:32,167 Off! 877 00:44:32,267 --> 00:44:34,133 Off! 878 00:44:34,233 --> 00:44:35,100 Off! Off! 879 00:44:35,200 --> 00:44:36,233 Off! Off! 880 00:44:36,333 --> 00:44:37,167 Off! 881 00:44:37,267 --> 00:44:38,900 Off! 882 00:44:39,000 --> 00:44:40,700 Off! 883 00:44:40,800 --> 00:44:41,767 Holy Mother preserve us. 884 00:44:49,867 --> 00:44:51,200 Come on, Mimi. 885 00:44:51,300 --> 00:44:52,533 It's not that big. 886 00:44:52,633 --> 00:44:53,500 Come on, mom. 887 00:44:53,600 --> 00:44:54,267 Mom. 888 00:44:54,367 --> 00:44:56,533 Oh fuck, ambulance, quick! 889 00:44:56,633 --> 00:44:58,000 Mam? Mam! 890 00:44:58,100 --> 00:44:59,200 Give us your phone. 891 00:45:08,033 --> 00:45:11,900 Good luck, Mimi! 892 00:45:12,000 --> 00:45:13,067 [siren] 893 00:45:21,967 --> 00:45:22,800 Frank! 894 00:45:27,700 --> 00:45:31,500 FRANK: (VOICEOVER) And even if you do find that you are indeed 895 00:45:31,600 --> 00:45:36,900 the only being in existence, and that everyone else-- every 896 00:45:37,000 --> 00:45:38,667 thing else in your world-- 897 00:45:38,767 --> 00:45:44,467 is merely a figment of your imagination, just enjoy it. 898 00:45:47,567 --> 00:45:48,467 [whirring] 899 00:46:01,367 --> 00:46:02,533 [theme music playing] 900 00:46:03,533 --> 00:46:06,433 Ba ba da ba. 901 00:46:06,533 --> 00:46:09,433 Ba ba da ba da ba. 902 00:46:09,533 --> 00:46:12,833 Ba ba da ba. 903 00:46:12,933 --> 00:46:15,833 Ba ba da ba da ba. 904 00:46:15,933 --> 00:46:18,400 Ba ba da da. 905 00:46:18,500 --> 00:46:21,233 Ba ba da ba da ba. 906 00:46:21,333 --> 00:46:30,400 Ba ba da ba da ba ba da ba ba ba da ba, ba da ba ba ba. 907 00:46:47,300 --> 00:46:49,233 FRANK: (VOICEOVER) You hear about these alien abductions, 908 00:46:49,333 --> 00:46:51,533 and it's all terror and fear, one- 909 00:46:51,633 --> 00:46:54,567 eyed green monsters dragging you across the universe 910 00:46:54,667 --> 00:46:58,233 to aid their experiments. 911 00:46:58,333 --> 00:47:02,767 But That's not been my experience. 912 00:47:02,867 --> 00:47:05,600 Quite the opposite, in fact. 913 00:47:05,700 --> 00:47:07,533 No complains thus far. 914 00:47:07,633 --> 00:47:10,767 No interference of any sort, you know, no temperature taken, 915 00:47:10,867 --> 00:47:13,133 no blood pressure, no blood samples. 916 00:47:13,233 --> 00:47:15,300 Even managed to escape the old anal probing. 917 00:47:21,033 --> 00:47:22,500 I think I spoke too soon. 918 00:47:22,600 --> 00:47:23,400 [farting] 919 00:47:27,933 --> 00:47:28,733 [yelling] 920 00:47:31,167 --> 00:47:33,367 [groaning]