1 00:00:00,533 --> 00:00:04,233 [music playing] 2 00:00:04,333 --> 00:00:06,167 [theme music playing] 3 00:00:06,267 --> 00:00:09,433 Tickets this way for the Chatsworth Express. 4 00:00:09,533 --> 00:00:10,800 YVONNE: Oi! 5 00:00:10,900 --> 00:00:13,167 FRANK: Come and watch pikeys making a mess of the lives that 6 00:00:13,267 --> 00:00:18,200 were given by him upstairs, and kids they're convinced 7 00:00:18,300 --> 00:00:19,300 aren't actually theirs. 8 00:00:19,400 --> 00:00:20,033 Wicked! 9 00:00:20,133 --> 00:00:21,567 Piss off. 10 00:00:21,667 --> 00:00:25,767 FRANK: What sounds on earth could ever replace kids needing 11 00:00:25,867 --> 00:00:28,200 money or wives in yer face? 12 00:00:28,300 --> 00:00:31,433 'Cause this, people reckon, me included, 13 00:00:31,533 --> 00:00:33,767 is why pubs and drugs we're kindly 14 00:00:33,867 --> 00:00:37,333 invented, to calm us all down and stop us going mental. 15 00:00:37,433 --> 00:00:43,267 These are Chatsworth Estate's basic essentials. 16 00:00:43,367 --> 00:00:49,167 We are worth every penny for grindin' your axes. 17 00:00:49,267 --> 00:00:52,800 Well, you shit on our 'ead, but you pay the taxes. 18 00:00:52,900 --> 00:00:54,433 [cheering and shouting] 19 00:00:54,533 --> 00:00:57,800 Imagine a Britain without Chatsworth buccaneers, 20 00:00:57,900 --> 00:01:00,767 who'll come on your face for the price of a beer, eh? 21 00:01:00,867 --> 00:01:01,667 [shane screaming] 22 00:01:01,767 --> 00:01:04,567 Make poverty history. 23 00:01:04,667 --> 00:01:07,100 Cheaper drugs now! 24 00:01:07,200 --> 00:01:09,433 Make poverty history. 25 00:01:09,533 --> 00:01:10,833 Cheaper drugs now! 26 00:01:10,933 --> 00:01:13,233 [frank cackling and babbling] 27 00:01:13,333 --> 00:01:16,767 [upbeat music playing] 28 00:01:19,833 --> 00:01:20,900 [rooster crowing] 29 00:01:21,000 --> 00:01:24,133 [IMPOSING ORCHESTRAL MUSIC PLAYING] 30 00:01:24,233 --> 00:01:26,533 [mysterious music playing] 31 00:01:26,633 --> 00:01:29,200 MIMI (VOICEOVER): I'm not sentimental about my kids. 32 00:01:29,300 --> 00:01:31,067 Woman I knew was convinced her brat 33 00:01:31,167 --> 00:01:32,533 was gonna be prime minister. 34 00:01:32,633 --> 00:01:35,333 Cold meats at Asda, since you asked. 35 00:01:35,433 --> 00:01:36,733 I know what my lot can do. 36 00:01:36,833 --> 00:01:39,633 They're not gonna surprise me. 37 00:01:39,733 --> 00:01:41,433 You don't choose your family. 38 00:01:41,533 --> 00:01:42,733 They're your gift. 39 00:01:42,833 --> 00:01:44,733 Or your burden. 40 00:01:44,833 --> 00:01:46,967 Or a by-product of the real choice. 41 00:01:47,067 --> 00:01:48,567 I do a lot for my kids. 42 00:01:48,667 --> 00:01:50,500 Mommy, daddy, pigs! 43 00:01:53,200 --> 00:01:55,200 MIMI: But I'd do anything for my Paddy. 44 00:01:55,300 --> 00:01:56,133 POLICE OFFICER: Police! 45 00:01:56,233 --> 00:01:57,400 A positive outrage. 46 00:01:57,500 --> 00:02:00,967 I play golf with the Chief Constable. 47 00:02:01,067 --> 00:02:04,200 See you in an hour, Mimo. 48 00:02:04,300 --> 00:02:07,200 Solicitor's waiting at the station, squirrel. 49 00:02:07,300 --> 00:02:07,933 Cow. 50 00:02:08,033 --> 00:02:09,467 Why didn't they nick me? 51 00:02:09,567 --> 00:02:11,400 I'm a threat. 52 00:02:11,500 --> 00:02:12,167 You knew. 53 00:02:12,267 --> 00:02:15,567 [mysterious music playing] 54 00:02:17,967 --> 00:02:19,300 Give this to our Mandy. 55 00:02:19,400 --> 00:02:20,800 I've done the stock take. 56 00:02:20,900 --> 00:02:21,967 You're responsible. 57 00:02:22,067 --> 00:02:23,067 Personally. 58 00:02:25,100 --> 00:02:28,500 [door slamming] 59 00:02:30,967 --> 00:02:33,567 [frank gibbering] 60 00:02:34,567 --> 00:02:35,433 FRANK: Siamese. 61 00:02:35,533 --> 00:02:36,400 Conjoined. 62 00:02:36,500 --> 00:02:37,733 Conjunction. 63 00:02:37,833 --> 00:02:38,700 [frank gibbering] 64 00:02:38,800 --> 00:02:39,667 Conjunctivitis. 65 00:02:39,767 --> 00:02:41,533 [distorted warbling] 66 00:02:41,633 --> 00:02:42,467 All of them? 67 00:02:42,567 --> 00:02:43,900 That's a lot of drugs, even for 'im. 68 00:02:44,000 --> 00:02:45,500 He must have sensed them. 69 00:02:45,600 --> 00:02:47,233 I went in there, watched "Supernanny." 70 00:02:47,333 --> 00:02:49,000 Sneaked upstairs and must have inhaled 'em. 71 00:02:49,100 --> 00:02:50,100 I don't know. 72 00:02:50,200 --> 00:02:51,667 He's a one. 73 00:02:51,767 --> 00:02:52,867 Where is he? 74 00:02:52,967 --> 00:02:55,633 [DISTORTED SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING] 75 00:02:55,733 --> 00:02:58,533 [frank gasping and gibbering] 76 00:02:59,600 --> 00:03:03,433 We're gonna owe your mom git loads. 77 00:03:03,533 --> 00:03:04,567 I'll have a word. 78 00:03:04,667 --> 00:03:06,000 She'll want something though, deffo. 79 00:03:06,100 --> 00:03:07,300 NEWSCASTER (ON TV): --In grammar skills, 80 00:03:07,400 --> 00:03:09,700 mathematics and science is low for children. 81 00:03:09,800 --> 00:03:10,933 The government's latest-- 82 00:03:11,033 --> 00:03:12,433 You don't earn that much selling these. 83 00:03:12,533 --> 00:03:14,267 You said it were 250 quid a pop. 84 00:03:14,367 --> 00:03:18,000 Well, someone's making some money at them shit-suckers. 85 00:03:18,100 --> 00:03:19,833 Bollocks. 86 00:03:19,933 --> 00:03:21,300 Can you find out how much we owe her? 87 00:03:21,400 --> 00:03:23,100 NEWSCASTER (ON TV): Now the weather is gonna be dry-- 88 00:03:23,200 --> 00:03:24,167 See what I can do. 89 00:03:27,067 --> 00:03:29,933 [suspenseful music playing] 90 00:03:30,033 --> 00:03:32,700 Are we straight? 91 00:03:32,800 --> 00:03:34,067 Have I cleared my debt? 92 00:03:34,167 --> 00:03:39,233 You're in hock till I say, (POINTEDLY) Sergeant. 93 00:03:39,333 --> 00:03:42,933 Why did they search our gaff, Sergeant? 94 00:03:43,033 --> 00:03:44,600 I only knew about the raid. 95 00:03:44,700 --> 00:03:47,667 Why am I still here, (POINTEDLY) Sergeant? 96 00:03:47,767 --> 00:03:48,567 I really don't know. 97 00:03:51,367 --> 00:03:54,667 [door creaking and slamming] 98 00:03:54,767 --> 00:03:56,567 [keys clinking, lock clicking] 99 00:03:56,667 --> 00:03:57,500 TOM: Hey, Carrie. 100 00:03:57,600 --> 00:03:59,767 "Sarge" is the traditional title. 101 00:03:59,867 --> 00:04:00,867 You are joking. 102 00:04:00,967 --> 00:04:01,900 Before, I was a natural leader. 103 00:04:02,000 --> 00:04:03,633 And now, I'm appointed. 104 00:04:03,733 --> 00:04:08,233 Tell me again why they let you re-sit your exam? 105 00:04:08,333 --> 00:04:10,967 You are under surveillance, (POINTEDLY) Constable. 106 00:04:11,067 --> 00:04:13,933 [door creaking and slamming] 107 00:04:14,033 --> 00:04:17,500 [suspenseful music playing] 108 00:04:23,567 --> 00:04:24,833 Oh. 109 00:04:24,933 --> 00:04:31,367 A V. As in very, very lucky to have me on your side, Sergeant. 110 00:04:31,467 --> 00:04:36,400 I'm looking forward to getting acquainted with you as agreed. 111 00:04:36,500 --> 00:04:39,267 Wanna sit in on the Maguire pow-wow? 112 00:04:39,367 --> 00:04:41,100 Yeah. 113 00:04:41,200 --> 00:04:42,600 Where's my solicitor? 114 00:04:42,700 --> 00:04:46,033 He canna wait, whackin' away with his little fat fists. 115 00:04:46,133 --> 00:04:47,467 Most amusin'. 116 00:04:47,567 --> 00:04:49,733 Fancy an afternoon at the flicks? 117 00:04:49,833 --> 00:04:51,233 Nasty armed blag. 118 00:04:51,333 --> 00:04:54,700 Prescription drugs, all-night chemists, two perps. 119 00:04:54,800 --> 00:04:57,700 Little Muscles threatens to cut chemist's hand off. 120 00:04:57,800 --> 00:04:58,633 Chemist gives in. 121 00:04:58,733 --> 00:04:59,767 Well, you would. 122 00:04:59,867 --> 00:05:01,400 Leads them in back for the stuff. 123 00:05:01,500 --> 00:05:05,667 The other one, he's the leader, he's got indigestion. 124 00:05:05,767 --> 00:05:07,800 Helps himself to some tablets. 125 00:05:07,900 --> 00:05:10,567 Safe though, 'cause he knows where the cameras are. 126 00:05:13,167 --> 00:05:14,033 Or does he? 127 00:05:14,133 --> 00:05:16,167 [suspenseful music playing] 128 00:05:16,267 --> 00:05:21,500 What if they'd fitted a new camera day before? 129 00:05:21,600 --> 00:05:22,400 Eh? 130 00:05:29,133 --> 00:05:31,333 Bang to fuckin' rights. 131 00:05:31,433 --> 00:05:32,567 You're not obliged to say anything, 132 00:05:32,667 --> 00:05:34,100 but we'd like it if you did, 'cause we 133 00:05:34,200 --> 00:05:37,367 could do with a fuckin' laugh. 134 00:05:37,467 --> 00:05:39,600 20 years. 135 00:05:39,700 --> 00:05:40,667 I can't! 136 00:05:40,767 --> 00:05:42,267 I can't live without-- 137 00:05:45,600 --> 00:05:48,500 We could die at our age, die apart! 138 00:05:48,600 --> 00:05:49,900 That's not the plan. 139 00:05:50,000 --> 00:05:51,500 I can't do that. 140 00:05:51,600 --> 00:05:54,400 Fat Todd says I should plead guilty. 141 00:05:54,500 --> 00:05:55,733 Fat Todd? 142 00:05:55,833 --> 00:05:58,467 We only went with him 'cause of his poncy card. 143 00:05:58,567 --> 00:06:00,500 We can do better than him, we can-- 144 00:06:00,600 --> 00:06:02,100 I'll cop a plea. 145 00:06:02,200 --> 00:06:04,433 Good judge, serve half, out in 10. 146 00:06:08,767 --> 00:06:10,200 (SOFTLY) Christ. 147 00:06:14,533 --> 00:06:16,300 No. 148 00:06:16,400 --> 00:06:17,900 Noel. 149 00:06:18,000 --> 00:06:19,333 Noel! 150 00:06:19,433 --> 00:06:20,167 Think about it. 151 00:06:20,267 --> 00:06:21,533 We could do something with him. 152 00:06:24,700 --> 00:06:27,300 I'd rather serve 20 without remission than speak to that. 153 00:06:27,400 --> 00:06:28,067 No. 154 00:06:28,167 --> 00:06:29,267 We need him. 155 00:06:29,367 --> 00:06:31,033 He can get you off this. 156 00:06:31,133 --> 00:06:32,667 D'you hear me? 157 00:06:32,767 --> 00:06:36,633 I've cut him off like a dead fucking limb. 158 00:06:36,733 --> 00:06:37,700 He's no part of me. 159 00:06:37,800 --> 00:06:39,967 [door clicks and creaks] 160 00:06:40,067 --> 00:06:41,133 TOM: You all right there? 161 00:06:41,233 --> 00:06:42,700 Fucking rot, then. 162 00:06:42,800 --> 00:06:46,833 I'm not waitin' for ye. 163 00:06:46,933 --> 00:06:49,167 [door creaks and slams] 164 00:06:49,267 --> 00:06:51,300 Mom's too upset to talk. 165 00:06:51,400 --> 00:06:53,900 Havin' a bit of family bother. 166 00:06:54,000 --> 00:06:57,500 Very bad timin' on Frank's part. 167 00:06:57,600 --> 00:07:01,833 I have managed to persuade 'er not to burn your house down. 168 00:07:01,933 --> 00:07:04,467 But you do owe 'er three grand. 169 00:07:04,567 --> 00:07:06,000 Pay up, fast. 170 00:07:12,900 --> 00:07:14,067 Good job Mandy's here to protect us. 171 00:07:14,167 --> 00:07:14,967 She'll see us right. 172 00:07:15,067 --> 00:07:16,467 Me dad's going down. 173 00:07:16,567 --> 00:07:18,233 She's not as malleable as normal. 174 00:07:18,333 --> 00:07:20,800 Shit. 175 00:07:20,900 --> 00:07:22,200 So, what are we gonna do? 176 00:07:22,300 --> 00:07:25,033 There's only one thing to do. 177 00:07:25,133 --> 00:07:28,133 Bugger it off mates who are minted. 178 00:07:28,233 --> 00:07:31,133 [melancholy music playing] 179 00:07:31,233 --> 00:07:32,600 LILLIAN: Have you seen it? 180 00:07:32,700 --> 00:07:33,967 It woke me up. 181 00:07:34,067 --> 00:07:35,333 LILLIAN: Everyone's heard the bugger. 182 00:07:35,433 --> 00:07:36,133 What's up? 183 00:07:36,233 --> 00:07:37,200 Lillian's lost her rooster. 184 00:07:37,300 --> 00:07:38,400 (AMERICAN ACCENT) Rooster. 185 00:07:38,500 --> 00:07:40,967 Goddammit, I'm gonna bomb your village. 186 00:07:41,067 --> 00:07:42,600 Can't call it a cock in our house. 187 00:07:42,700 --> 00:07:44,267 Cause all manner of palaver. 188 00:07:44,367 --> 00:07:45,933 Only got it for that Latvian girl. 189 00:07:46,033 --> 00:07:48,433 Thought it might make her feel more at home. 190 00:07:48,533 --> 00:07:49,167 She's allergic. 191 00:07:49,267 --> 00:07:51,467 [jamie and kelly laughing] 192 00:07:51,567 --> 00:07:53,600 I need a favor, yeah? 193 00:07:56,233 --> 00:07:58,667 I feel a right twat. 194 00:07:58,767 --> 00:08:00,833 I need a loan. Three grand. 195 00:08:00,933 --> 00:08:01,833 My dad's had your mom's drugs. 196 00:08:01,933 --> 00:08:03,800 It's an emergency. 197 00:08:03,900 --> 00:08:05,167 - We can't do it, mate. - Please. 198 00:08:05,267 --> 00:08:06,067 I've seen the safe. 199 00:08:06,167 --> 00:08:07,000 I know you've got it. 200 00:08:07,100 --> 00:08:08,067 It's all gone. 201 00:08:08,167 --> 00:08:09,100 Deposit for a kitchen. 202 00:08:09,200 --> 00:08:11,600 Yep, doing the Thai food thing. 203 00:08:11,700 --> 00:08:12,733 Three grand's not that much. 204 00:08:12,833 --> 00:08:13,900 It is going to your family. 205 00:08:14,000 --> 00:08:15,100 Sorry. 206 00:08:15,200 --> 00:08:16,567 Look, we know you're good for it but-- 207 00:08:16,667 --> 00:08:18,100 We would. 208 00:08:18,200 --> 00:08:20,733 We really would, but-- 209 00:08:20,833 --> 00:08:22,033 Pot's dry. 210 00:08:22,133 --> 00:08:25,033 [glassware rattling] 211 00:08:25,900 --> 00:08:27,600 New staff. Victor. 212 00:08:27,700 --> 00:08:28,700 He's a cook. 213 00:08:28,800 --> 00:08:30,233 You know, with you off traveling. 214 00:08:30,333 --> 00:08:31,500 I'm not going for ages. 215 00:08:31,600 --> 00:08:32,433 KELLY: Sorry. 216 00:08:32,533 --> 00:08:33,467 [jamie sighs] 217 00:08:33,567 --> 00:08:35,200 We'll still need you for loads of shifts. 218 00:08:35,300 --> 00:08:36,433 It's plenty o' work. 219 00:08:40,200 --> 00:08:41,567 Here, mate. 220 00:08:41,667 --> 00:08:42,633 Have one on the management. 221 00:08:42,733 --> 00:08:43,633 They're not just my bosses. 222 00:08:43,733 --> 00:08:44,667 They're my mates. 223 00:08:44,767 --> 00:08:46,033 No such thing. 224 00:08:46,133 --> 00:08:49,733 Capital, labor, cast off your chains, us and them. 225 00:08:49,833 --> 00:08:51,600 I'm still with them. 226 00:08:51,700 --> 00:08:53,500 Class traitor, are ya? 227 00:08:53,600 --> 00:08:55,067 Piss off. 228 00:08:55,167 --> 00:08:57,567 [suspenseful music playing] 229 00:08:57,667 --> 00:09:01,033 [vacuum cleaner roaring] 230 00:09:04,833 --> 00:09:06,000 Suction central. 231 00:09:06,100 --> 00:09:07,900 One o' your gents slaps this on for a posh wank, 232 00:09:08,000 --> 00:09:08,833 won't need a hospital. 233 00:09:08,933 --> 00:09:10,167 They'll need a morgue. 234 00:09:10,267 --> 00:09:11,900 Will it vac up chicken poo? 235 00:09:12,000 --> 00:09:14,367 Strong enough for human cack. 236 00:09:14,467 --> 00:09:16,867 Actually that might be handy. 237 00:09:16,967 --> 00:09:18,567 I need to launder some bills. 238 00:09:24,133 --> 00:09:25,267 Bye love. 239 00:09:25,367 --> 00:09:27,767 Filled your boots there. 240 00:09:27,867 --> 00:09:28,967 That mine, then? 241 00:09:29,067 --> 00:09:29,867 No. 242 00:09:29,967 --> 00:09:31,233 That's the demonstrator. 243 00:09:31,333 --> 00:09:32,267 You get a brand-new one. 244 00:09:32,367 --> 00:09:33,867 Firm will deliver it. 245 00:09:33,967 --> 00:09:34,833 [distant siren] 246 00:09:34,933 --> 00:09:35,800 [suspenseful music playing] 247 00:09:35,900 --> 00:09:39,433 [dog barking] 248 00:09:39,533 --> 00:09:40,167 [heads cracking] 249 00:09:40,267 --> 00:09:41,100 [ian yelping in pain] 250 00:09:41,200 --> 00:09:44,167 [blows thudding] 251 00:09:44,267 --> 00:09:46,367 THUG: Gimme that fuckin' money. 252 00:09:46,467 --> 00:09:47,133 [kick thudding] 253 00:09:47,233 --> 00:09:50,367 [ian whimpering] 254 00:09:51,200 --> 00:09:54,667 [ian shouting] 255 00:09:56,033 --> 00:09:59,500 Great fire will surely rain down upon them, 256 00:09:59,600 --> 00:10:00,700 and will smite-- 257 00:10:00,800 --> 00:10:02,533 Shut up. 258 00:10:02,633 --> 00:10:03,600 Think, Shane. 259 00:10:07,667 --> 00:10:09,800 He's not even gone down yet, and they're 260 00:10:09,900 --> 00:10:10,933 puttin' the squeeze on us. 261 00:10:11,033 --> 00:10:11,833 What's next, eh? 262 00:10:11,933 --> 00:10:12,767 War. 263 00:10:12,867 --> 00:10:13,767 No. 264 00:10:13,867 --> 00:10:16,367 We're nothing without your dad. 265 00:10:16,467 --> 00:10:17,967 Are you scared? 266 00:10:18,067 --> 00:10:18,900 Course I am. 267 00:10:19,000 --> 00:10:21,300 I'm not stupid. 268 00:10:21,400 --> 00:10:25,033 [suspenseful music playing] 269 00:10:27,933 --> 00:10:29,000 Been robbed. 270 00:10:29,100 --> 00:10:30,267 Took my cash, the demonstrator. 271 00:10:30,367 --> 00:10:31,167 We're totally screwed! 272 00:10:31,267 --> 00:10:32,633 What we gonna do? 273 00:10:32,733 --> 00:10:33,667 Can't borrow the money. 274 00:10:33,767 --> 00:10:35,167 Can't earn it. 275 00:10:35,267 --> 00:10:36,900 No, this isn't gonna happen. 276 00:10:37,000 --> 00:10:38,067 I'm not gonna let it. 277 00:10:38,167 --> 00:10:39,533 It's time for us to all muck in. 278 00:10:39,633 --> 00:10:40,267 Work? 279 00:10:40,367 --> 00:10:41,433 [scoffs] In my condition? 280 00:10:41,533 --> 00:10:42,167 Right. 281 00:10:42,267 --> 00:10:43,133 Yeah, I'm the dickhead. 282 00:10:43,233 --> 00:10:44,300 It's my fault. 283 00:10:44,400 --> 00:10:45,400 Dad's. 284 00:10:45,500 --> 00:10:46,600 DEBBIE: Yeah, well, we all need to chip in. 285 00:10:46,700 --> 00:10:48,567 Mimi has to be paid. 286 00:10:48,667 --> 00:10:49,533 Yeah? 287 00:10:49,633 --> 00:10:50,700 Yeah. 288 00:10:50,800 --> 00:10:52,233 DEBBIE: Carl? 289 00:10:52,333 --> 00:10:53,033 Yeah. 290 00:10:53,133 --> 00:10:54,000 DEBBIE: Ian? 291 00:10:54,100 --> 00:10:54,967 Right. 292 00:10:55,067 --> 00:10:56,400 Come on, let's get to work. 293 00:10:56,500 --> 00:10:57,667 Oh, yeah. 294 00:10:57,767 --> 00:11:00,533 MIMI: None of the kids can deal while you're on bail. 295 00:11:00,633 --> 00:11:02,200 Business on hold. 296 00:11:02,300 --> 00:11:03,933 How are we gonna manage? 297 00:11:04,033 --> 00:11:04,867 We'll find a way. 298 00:11:04,967 --> 00:11:06,067 I'm not getting involved. 299 00:11:06,167 --> 00:11:08,333 Neither am I. 300 00:11:08,433 --> 00:11:11,100 We're goin' down the pan. 301 00:11:11,200 --> 00:11:14,167 Only one chance. 302 00:11:14,267 --> 00:11:15,667 I can't do that. 303 00:11:15,767 --> 00:11:16,567 Why not? 304 00:11:16,667 --> 00:11:19,167 Mind your own business. 305 00:11:19,267 --> 00:11:21,200 Mom's rang Noel. 306 00:11:21,300 --> 00:11:25,533 If you ask him yourself, he'll drop everything and come. 307 00:11:25,633 --> 00:11:26,467 You rang him? 308 00:11:26,567 --> 00:11:27,967 I've got to help you. 309 00:11:28,067 --> 00:11:29,300 What else can we do? 310 00:11:41,733 --> 00:11:43,633 I can't do it. 311 00:11:43,733 --> 00:11:44,767 Not even for you. 312 00:11:52,567 --> 00:11:53,433 CARRIE: You're out. 313 00:11:53,533 --> 00:11:54,967 Your brief's better then I thought. 314 00:11:55,067 --> 00:11:55,867 Shut your mouth, bitch. 315 00:11:55,967 --> 00:11:57,167 I own ye. 316 00:11:57,267 --> 00:11:58,700 S'not much point owning me where you're going, 317 00:11:58,800 --> 00:12:02,367 and I can't do anything to stop that, (POINTEDLY) boss. 318 00:12:05,833 --> 00:12:09,267 [suspenseful music playing] 319 00:12:15,133 --> 00:12:18,567 [mobile phone beeping] 320 00:12:24,600 --> 00:12:25,500 It's me. 321 00:12:29,033 --> 00:12:32,500 I need your help, and it's not a kidney. 322 00:12:32,600 --> 00:12:34,433 Please, Noel. 323 00:12:43,100 --> 00:12:44,733 Oh, you'll consider me? 324 00:12:44,833 --> 00:12:46,200 Really? 325 00:12:46,300 --> 00:12:50,067 (STAMMERS) I've um, got absolutely no experience, 326 00:12:50,167 --> 00:12:51,167 and I'm very preggy. 327 00:12:53,700 --> 00:12:55,867 Oh, what a shame. 328 00:12:55,967 --> 00:12:57,800 No, don't worry about it. 329 00:12:57,900 --> 00:13:00,833 Soon as you mention that, brick wall. 330 00:13:00,933 --> 00:13:01,800 Mm. 331 00:13:01,900 --> 00:13:03,867 Yeah, there should be a law. 332 00:13:03,967 --> 00:13:08,700 (SIGHS IN RELIEF) 333 00:13:08,800 --> 00:13:10,367 I need another demonstrator. 334 00:13:10,467 --> 00:13:13,733 In this scenario, I will be willing to sell you another, 335 00:13:13,833 --> 00:13:15,333 special circs, et cetera. 336 00:13:15,433 --> 00:13:18,100 All we need is 100 pounds, and before you know it, 337 00:13:18,200 --> 00:13:20,533 the cash lorry's backin' into your depot. 338 00:13:20,633 --> 00:13:22,900 Beep, beep, beep. 339 00:13:23,000 --> 00:13:24,033 I'm skint. 340 00:13:24,133 --> 00:13:25,067 Can't I get an advance? 341 00:13:25,167 --> 00:13:27,367 Oh, company policy. 342 00:13:27,467 --> 00:13:28,100 Hands tied. 343 00:13:28,200 --> 00:13:31,133 [harsh sad music playing] 344 00:13:31,233 --> 00:13:33,967 [pop music playing] 345 00:13:34,067 --> 00:13:35,067 Hey, get off if you want. 346 00:13:35,167 --> 00:13:36,300 Come back tonight. 347 00:13:36,400 --> 00:13:38,333 I know you need to get sellin'. 348 00:13:38,433 --> 00:13:40,633 Yeah, I do. 349 00:13:40,733 --> 00:13:42,433 You're all right, then. 350 00:13:42,533 --> 00:13:43,767 Yeah, why? 351 00:13:43,867 --> 00:13:45,633 Got a text sayin' you been stabbed and you were in A&E. 352 00:13:45,733 --> 00:13:47,867 That's that evil wanker who took my phone, 353 00:13:47,967 --> 00:13:49,433 and my money, and my hoover. 354 00:13:49,533 --> 00:13:50,467 Nasty. 355 00:13:50,567 --> 00:13:51,733 And why aren't you looking for work? 356 00:13:51,833 --> 00:13:53,000 I've tried. 357 00:13:53,100 --> 00:13:55,100 No one wants an unqualified, pregnant woman 358 00:13:55,200 --> 00:13:56,333 of my advanced years. 359 00:13:56,433 --> 00:13:58,133 Sexism, ageism, womb-ism. 360 00:13:58,233 --> 00:14:01,067 Give us a whiskey and a tomato juice. 361 00:14:01,167 --> 00:14:04,133 That's what me body wants. 362 00:14:04,233 --> 00:14:05,400 JAMIE: Where you off? 363 00:14:05,500 --> 00:14:06,133 Dry cleaners. 364 00:14:06,233 --> 00:14:07,700 You gonna cash up? 365 00:14:07,800 --> 00:14:10,900 Just do it all in one go tonight. 366 00:14:11,000 --> 00:14:12,000 Listen, I'll get Vic. 367 00:14:12,100 --> 00:14:12,933 You leg it. 368 00:14:13,033 --> 00:14:14,000 IAN: Yeah, OK. 369 00:14:18,000 --> 00:14:21,467 [CASH REGISTER BEEPING AND RATCHETING] 370 00:14:23,367 --> 00:14:26,800 [suspenseful music playing] 371 00:14:39,767 --> 00:14:41,933 [jamie and victor chattering] 372 00:14:42,033 --> 00:14:42,867 Cheers. 373 00:14:42,967 --> 00:14:45,767 I'll see ya tonight. 374 00:14:45,867 --> 00:14:48,567 See ya. 375 00:14:48,667 --> 00:14:49,967 (QUIETLY) Oh, fuck. 376 00:14:50,067 --> 00:14:51,300 CARRIE: I've put in for firearms. 377 00:14:51,400 --> 00:14:54,067 I want shifts at the airport with machine guns. 378 00:14:54,167 --> 00:14:55,100 STAN: Why would you have those? 379 00:14:55,200 --> 00:14:56,400 We know those civilians. 380 00:14:56,500 --> 00:14:58,100 Surely, machine gun's the last thing you need. 381 00:14:58,200 --> 00:15:00,133 CARRIE: They look really cool. 382 00:15:00,233 --> 00:15:02,167 KITTY: Sergeant. 383 00:15:02,267 --> 00:15:03,867 I've been looking for you. - Ma'am. 384 00:15:03,967 --> 00:15:04,767 Mm. 385 00:15:04,867 --> 00:15:05,700 Ma'am. 386 00:15:05,800 --> 00:15:07,700 I like that. 387 00:15:07,800 --> 00:15:09,267 Next week, Los Angeles. 388 00:15:09,367 --> 00:15:10,767 Fact finding mission, gang scum. 389 00:15:10,867 --> 00:15:12,733 (AMERICAN ACCENT) Poppin' caps in yo' ass, (NORMALLY) 390 00:15:12,833 --> 00:15:14,067 and so on. 391 00:15:14,167 --> 00:15:16,167 Want to come, wi' me? 392 00:15:16,267 --> 00:15:19,067 I'd love to, but I haven't got a passport, ma'am. 393 00:15:19,167 --> 00:15:23,000 - I'll go. - (SCOFFS) I don't think so. 394 00:15:23,100 --> 00:15:25,800 I'm disappointed. 395 00:15:25,900 --> 00:15:27,833 Very. 396 00:15:27,933 --> 00:15:29,867 She thinks I made that up. 397 00:15:29,967 --> 00:15:31,900 - Well, you did. - I didn't. 398 00:15:32,000 --> 00:15:33,133 I ain't got a passport. 399 00:15:33,233 --> 00:15:34,067 Yes, ye have. 400 00:15:34,167 --> 00:15:35,433 Shut up, Tom. 401 00:15:35,533 --> 00:15:36,433 Who's the sergeant? 402 00:15:36,533 --> 00:15:37,867 Don't see why she wouldn't take me. 403 00:15:37,967 --> 00:15:39,267 You lack a vagina. 404 00:15:39,367 --> 00:15:40,967 How do you think she became sergeant? 405 00:15:41,067 --> 00:15:43,800 You and me are gonna fall out. 406 00:15:43,900 --> 00:15:46,533 I thought we already had. 407 00:15:46,633 --> 00:15:50,100 [telephone trilling] 408 00:15:56,433 --> 00:16:00,067 [suspenseful music playing] 409 00:16:11,933 --> 00:16:15,400 [upbeat music playing] 410 00:16:19,467 --> 00:16:22,367 Please. 411 00:16:22,467 --> 00:16:25,767 [bills rustling] 412 00:16:28,933 --> 00:16:29,733 What? 413 00:16:33,233 --> 00:16:36,700 [ian huffing] 414 00:16:42,633 --> 00:16:44,833 (SIGHS) You were two hours ago, love. 415 00:16:44,933 --> 00:16:46,167 I still don't want one. 416 00:16:49,000 --> 00:16:52,367 [door clacks shut and rattles] 417 00:16:54,567 --> 00:16:55,967 - Oh, admit it, Vic! - Thievin' twat! 418 00:16:56,067 --> 00:16:57,467 You stole money outta the fucking till! 419 00:16:57,567 --> 00:16:58,400 I didn't! 420 00:16:58,500 --> 00:16:59,367 I fucking swear. 421 00:16:59,467 --> 00:17:00,700 I'm a working man, not a thief. 422 00:17:00,800 --> 00:17:01,900 What's going on? 423 00:17:02,000 --> 00:17:03,067 This one's had his hand in the till. 424 00:17:03,167 --> 00:17:04,667 It wasn't me! 425 00:17:04,767 --> 00:17:05,867 Typical boss class. 426 00:17:05,967 --> 00:17:06,967 Um. 427 00:17:07,067 --> 00:17:08,200 Maybe it wasn't him. 428 00:17:08,300 --> 00:17:10,200 Don't you go all Workers United on us! 429 00:17:10,300 --> 00:17:11,733 This is well out of order. 430 00:17:11,833 --> 00:17:13,433 Fuck you both. 431 00:17:13,533 --> 00:17:15,800 You're a pussy-whipped bastard, and you're a fucking slag. 432 00:17:15,900 --> 00:17:16,700 Oh yeah? 433 00:17:16,800 --> 00:17:20,167 [ominous music playing] 434 00:17:24,333 --> 00:17:26,600 Chrissake, you cannot get the staff. 435 00:17:31,333 --> 00:17:33,667 SHANE: So why'd you fall out again? 436 00:17:33,767 --> 00:17:35,700 Don't want to talk about it. 437 00:17:35,800 --> 00:17:37,800 It's 'cause Uncle Noel's gay. 438 00:17:37,900 --> 00:17:39,700 Who told you? 439 00:17:39,800 --> 00:17:41,967 That's not-- Shut it. 440 00:17:42,067 --> 00:17:43,033 We all know. 441 00:17:43,133 --> 00:17:46,467 Don't talk about it. 442 00:17:46,567 --> 00:17:48,200 It's bad enough havin' a pillow-biter in the family 443 00:17:48,300 --> 00:17:49,367 without voicin' it. 444 00:17:51,900 --> 00:17:53,633 So you're eh, you're identical twins? 445 00:17:56,700 --> 00:18:00,400 (THOUGHTFULLY) Oh. 446 00:18:00,500 --> 00:18:02,333 (MENACINGLY) What do you mean by "Oh?" 447 00:18:02,433 --> 00:18:03,100 Dunno. 448 00:18:03,200 --> 00:18:05,167 It's just identical. 449 00:18:05,267 --> 00:18:07,800 It means exactly the same. 450 00:18:07,900 --> 00:18:09,133 PADDY: You so much as fucking hint 451 00:18:09,233 --> 00:18:11,500 that I'm some bum-burgling no mark again, 452 00:18:11,600 --> 00:18:14,500 and I'll rip your fucking entrails out, 453 00:18:14,600 --> 00:18:16,400 d'you understand me? 454 00:18:16,500 --> 00:18:17,300 Do you? 455 00:18:20,367 --> 00:18:22,067 There's only one pervert in this family. 456 00:18:22,167 --> 00:18:23,000 [door clacks shut] 457 00:18:23,100 --> 00:18:25,667 What do you say? 458 00:18:25,767 --> 00:18:27,767 'Ello, Uncle Noel. 459 00:18:27,867 --> 00:18:31,033 [suspenseful music playing] 460 00:18:31,133 --> 00:18:33,267 [speaking french] 461 00:18:34,533 --> 00:18:35,367 Bonjour, Patrick. 462 00:18:40,367 --> 00:18:41,933 Look, I'm not sticking up for him. 463 00:18:42,033 --> 00:18:43,700 I'm just saying there's other possibilities. 464 00:18:43,800 --> 00:18:45,333 Do you want your shifts back, or should we go 465 00:18:45,433 --> 00:18:46,433 and try and find someone else? 466 00:18:46,533 --> 00:18:48,967 [PATRONS CHATTERING AND LAUGHING] 467 00:18:49,067 --> 00:18:50,467 Yeah, I'll have 'em. 468 00:18:50,567 --> 00:18:51,400 Cheers. 469 00:18:56,467 --> 00:18:58,800 He's never forgiven me for being the oldest. 470 00:18:58,900 --> 00:19:00,367 I am the oldest. 471 00:19:00,467 --> 00:19:02,833 I was in the birth canal when you came out of the C-section. 472 00:19:02,933 --> 00:19:04,467 That's the real risk. 473 00:19:04,567 --> 00:19:07,833 I breathed air first, ergo oldest. 474 00:19:07,933 --> 00:19:09,067 It's the oldest argument too. 475 00:19:09,167 --> 00:19:10,467 I've missed it. 476 00:19:10,567 --> 00:19:11,633 I haven't. 477 00:19:11,733 --> 00:19:13,867 And I was mommy's favorite. 478 00:19:13,967 --> 00:19:15,467 She liked going shoppin' with you. 479 00:19:15,567 --> 00:19:16,867 We know why you're so good at it now. 480 00:19:16,967 --> 00:19:18,433 That doesn't make you favorite. 481 00:19:18,533 --> 00:19:20,967 Who wouldn't prefer shopping to waitin' in police stations? 482 00:19:21,067 --> 00:19:22,100 I was a good boy. 483 00:19:22,200 --> 00:19:24,400 What's so good about gay pride, eh? 484 00:19:24,500 --> 00:19:25,167 What a laugh. 485 00:19:25,267 --> 00:19:26,267 What's to be proud of? 486 00:19:26,367 --> 00:19:28,467 Clearly nothing, for you. 487 00:19:28,567 --> 00:19:30,067 And for that, I'm out of your life, 488 00:19:30,167 --> 00:19:31,467 and I miss your family growing up? 489 00:19:31,567 --> 00:19:32,233 MIMI: Stop it. 490 00:19:32,333 --> 00:19:33,733 There's no time for this. 491 00:19:33,833 --> 00:19:35,633 Paddy's in a hole. 492 00:19:35,733 --> 00:19:39,233 Lookin' at 20 years inside. 493 00:19:39,333 --> 00:19:40,800 [noel sighing] What do you want me to do? 494 00:19:40,900 --> 00:19:43,733 We want to confuse the police with this identical twin thing. 495 00:19:43,833 --> 00:19:47,133 Restage the robbery on the chemist with one of you 496 00:19:47,233 --> 00:19:49,533 in custody as Paddy. 497 00:19:49,633 --> 00:19:50,700 Crime. 498 00:19:50,800 --> 00:19:52,200 Mercy. 499 00:19:52,300 --> 00:19:54,367 Exactly the same job. 500 00:19:54,467 --> 00:19:57,533 But with Paddy inside, he'll have a definite alibi. 501 00:19:57,633 --> 00:20:00,267 Means it might not have been him the first time. 502 00:20:00,367 --> 00:20:02,333 Creates a reasonable doubt. 503 00:20:02,433 --> 00:20:03,900 They'll never get a conviction. 504 00:20:04,000 --> 00:20:05,300 What about me? 505 00:20:05,400 --> 00:20:07,133 They'll be seeking a looky-likey. 506 00:20:07,233 --> 00:20:08,767 Why not try twinny? I would. 507 00:20:08,867 --> 00:20:10,100 'Cause nobody knows shit about you. 508 00:20:10,200 --> 00:20:11,533 I made sure o' that. 509 00:20:11,633 --> 00:20:12,767 And what if I get caught? 510 00:20:12,867 --> 00:20:16,067 Think of all the men (LAUGHS) desperate for sex. 511 00:20:16,167 --> 00:20:19,500 There are easier ways than-- 512 00:20:19,600 --> 00:20:21,067 Why do I bother? 513 00:20:21,167 --> 00:20:23,733 Why would I risk that for you? 514 00:20:23,833 --> 00:20:25,700 You despise me. 515 00:20:25,800 --> 00:20:27,733 Family. 516 00:20:27,833 --> 00:20:30,533 MIMI: We'll do everything to keep you out the frame. 517 00:20:30,633 --> 00:20:32,867 It's a risk. 518 00:20:32,967 --> 00:20:34,100 Scared, gay-boy? 519 00:20:37,100 --> 00:20:38,500 Not as scared as you, this time. 520 00:20:41,900 --> 00:20:43,767 Oh, Patrick. 521 00:20:43,867 --> 00:20:47,033 We were as close as could be. 522 00:20:47,133 --> 00:20:49,133 You're still an angry fuck. 523 00:20:49,233 --> 00:20:50,233 I won't do it. 524 00:20:54,000 --> 00:20:57,233 MIMI: Nice one, Prisoner 5645. 525 00:20:57,333 --> 00:20:59,567 What's your fall-back plan, Houdini? 526 00:21:03,867 --> 00:21:04,667 Micky. 527 00:21:07,500 --> 00:21:08,267 Uncle Noel. 528 00:21:08,367 --> 00:21:10,000 Go fetch him back. - Why me? 529 00:21:10,100 --> 00:21:11,867 'Cause you're the nearest thing we got to a pansy. 530 00:21:11,967 --> 00:21:13,033 Piss off. 531 00:21:13,133 --> 00:21:13,733 PADDY: Don't come back without him. 532 00:21:17,667 --> 00:21:18,900 [door slamming] 533 00:21:19,000 --> 00:21:19,867 [door clanking] 534 00:21:19,967 --> 00:21:21,033 IAN: You all right? 535 00:21:21,133 --> 00:21:23,033 See you later, Teddy. 536 00:21:23,133 --> 00:21:26,600 [distant dog barking] 537 00:21:31,100 --> 00:21:34,600 [ominous music playing] 538 00:21:51,033 --> 00:21:54,533 [glass shatters, flame whooshes] 539 00:21:57,600 --> 00:22:01,067 [fire crackling] 540 00:22:11,967 --> 00:22:15,467 [whimsical music playing] 541 00:22:16,967 --> 00:22:19,867 [sex toy buzzing] 542 00:22:19,967 --> 00:22:23,433 [ominous music playing] 543 00:22:38,300 --> 00:22:40,867 [MUSIC - EDVARD GRIEG, "MORGENSTIMMUNG"] 544 00:22:40,967 --> 00:22:41,767 [ominous music playing] 545 00:22:41,867 --> 00:22:44,833 [rooster crowing] 546 00:22:44,933 --> 00:22:46,900 Roast dinner dodging bastard. 547 00:22:47,000 --> 00:22:48,467 Jesus. 548 00:22:48,567 --> 00:22:50,467 What's the time? 549 00:22:50,567 --> 00:22:52,533 [rooster crowing] 550 00:22:52,633 --> 00:22:53,433 What's that smell? 551 00:22:56,500 --> 00:22:57,400 [siren wailing] 552 00:22:57,500 --> 00:22:58,333 Fuck! 553 00:22:58,433 --> 00:22:59,233 Shit! 554 00:22:59,333 --> 00:23:02,800 [serene music playing] 555 00:23:11,033 --> 00:23:12,000 Goblin Teasmade. 556 00:23:24,533 --> 00:23:26,600 Surprisingly comfortable, your fanny magnet. 557 00:23:30,033 --> 00:23:32,467 I'm not outing anyone. 558 00:23:32,567 --> 00:23:33,367 I know what he's like. 559 00:23:37,800 --> 00:23:40,367 When did you last see 'im? 560 00:23:40,467 --> 00:23:41,467 Ooh. 561 00:23:41,567 --> 00:23:43,467 When he said, stay away from me you dirty poof. 562 00:23:47,367 --> 00:23:51,567 Can't have been all his fault. 563 00:23:52,933 --> 00:23:56,867 He thought we were completely honest with each other. 564 00:23:56,967 --> 00:23:58,467 Caught me in flagrante. 565 00:23:58,567 --> 00:23:59,767 That a nightclub? 566 00:23:59,867 --> 00:24:01,100 In the act. 567 00:24:01,200 --> 00:24:02,200 I know what it means. 568 00:24:04,733 --> 00:24:06,600 Kicked my head in. 569 00:24:06,700 --> 00:24:08,100 Felt betrayed. 570 00:24:08,200 --> 00:24:11,800 Couldn't trust me. 571 00:24:11,900 --> 00:24:13,400 Irrevocable breakdown. 572 00:24:16,100 --> 00:24:17,567 And then you fucked off to uni and started 573 00:24:17,667 --> 00:24:19,633 wankin' on like a student. 574 00:24:19,733 --> 00:24:20,633 Indubitably. 575 00:24:24,133 --> 00:24:27,233 We'd stopped gettin' along before he knew. 576 00:24:27,333 --> 00:24:31,767 He used it as an excuse to formalize the break. 577 00:24:31,867 --> 00:24:33,633 He betrayed me. 578 00:24:33,733 --> 00:24:37,800 He did, and he knows it. 579 00:24:37,900 --> 00:24:39,033 Why do you think he's so guilty? 580 00:24:43,600 --> 00:24:46,000 I know he's a bastard. 581 00:24:46,100 --> 00:24:49,900 But I still don't want him to go down. 582 00:24:50,000 --> 00:24:52,367 Please, Uncle Noel. 583 00:24:55,833 --> 00:24:59,300 [melancholy music playing] 584 00:25:05,767 --> 00:25:07,833 Could have been worse. 585 00:25:07,933 --> 00:25:09,900 We could look like this. 586 00:25:10,000 --> 00:25:11,933 What the fuck? 587 00:25:12,033 --> 00:25:12,867 You all right? 588 00:25:12,967 --> 00:25:13,767 What happened? 589 00:25:13,867 --> 00:25:14,900 JAMIE: Torched. 590 00:25:15,000 --> 00:25:16,767 That prat, Victor. 591 00:25:16,867 --> 00:25:18,533 I'm going to rip his spleen out. 592 00:25:18,633 --> 00:25:21,700 Jesus, I thought-- 593 00:25:21,800 --> 00:25:22,867 I'm so sorry. 594 00:25:22,967 --> 00:25:25,267 (SCOFFING) It's hardly your fault, mate. 595 00:25:25,367 --> 00:25:26,200 It is. 596 00:25:30,300 --> 00:25:31,833 I should have been nicer to 'im. 597 00:25:31,933 --> 00:25:33,033 I felt sorry for him. 598 00:25:33,133 --> 00:25:35,300 Lost his last job. 599 00:25:35,400 --> 00:25:36,300 What? 600 00:25:36,400 --> 00:25:38,000 He lost his last one when the pub-- 601 00:25:41,133 --> 00:25:41,967 Burnt down. 602 00:25:42,067 --> 00:25:44,967 Chrissake, Jamie. 603 00:25:45,067 --> 00:25:48,500 We'd be dead if it weren't for that bird. 604 00:25:48,600 --> 00:25:49,833 Lillian's rooster. 605 00:25:49,933 --> 00:25:51,467 Woke us up cock-a-doodlin'. 606 00:25:51,567 --> 00:25:52,567 Bloody fire brigade. 607 00:25:52,667 --> 00:25:54,433 Why couldn't they watch where they're goin'? 608 00:25:54,533 --> 00:25:57,967 I'll take it (STAMMERING) to Lillian's. 609 00:25:58,067 --> 00:25:59,633 Might have to lay you off for a bit, mate. 610 00:26:04,133 --> 00:26:07,600 [grim music playing] 611 00:26:09,100 --> 00:26:11,000 [ian sighs heavily] 612 00:26:11,100 --> 00:26:13,233 [flute music playing] 613 00:26:13,333 --> 00:26:14,333 Well, you could try. 614 00:26:19,667 --> 00:26:20,467 What's up? 615 00:26:25,700 --> 00:26:28,633 Done somethin' really stupid. 616 00:26:28,733 --> 00:26:31,900 Well, can you fix it? 617 00:26:32,000 --> 00:26:33,167 Don't you wanna know what I did? 618 00:26:36,767 --> 00:26:39,900 Don't know if I can. 619 00:26:40,000 --> 00:26:42,767 I mean, I could shut up about it, 620 00:26:42,867 --> 00:26:46,633 and no one would know the difference. 621 00:26:46,733 --> 00:26:50,000 I've been a total twat to mates. 622 00:26:50,100 --> 00:26:54,033 And what good would tellin' the truth do? 623 00:26:54,133 --> 00:26:57,733 It might make me feel better. 624 00:26:57,833 --> 00:26:58,967 Just keep it shut. 625 00:26:59,067 --> 00:27:01,533 Cope with the guilt on your own. 626 00:27:01,633 --> 00:27:04,667 That's a punishment. 627 00:27:04,767 --> 00:27:08,600 [ian sighs heavily] 628 00:27:08,700 --> 00:27:10,400 (QUIETLY) Fuckin' hell. 629 00:27:10,500 --> 00:27:14,367 [CHEERING AND GRUNTING ON VIDEO GAME] 630 00:27:14,467 --> 00:27:16,433 VIDEO GAME CHARACTER: You lose. - What are you doin'? 631 00:27:16,533 --> 00:27:17,167 You had me. 632 00:27:17,267 --> 00:27:19,200 I can't be arsed. 633 00:27:19,300 --> 00:27:21,800 I only play for ye. 634 00:27:21,900 --> 00:27:22,800 Have you found Noel? 635 00:27:22,900 --> 00:27:24,767 In car, waitin' for youse. 636 00:27:24,867 --> 00:27:27,700 We've been campin' out all night. 637 00:27:27,800 --> 00:27:31,267 [grim music playing] 638 00:27:32,167 --> 00:27:35,633 [mimi sighs in relief] 639 00:27:40,100 --> 00:27:43,000 [car window whirring] 640 00:27:43,100 --> 00:27:44,533 [paddy sighs heavily] 641 00:27:44,633 --> 00:27:47,200 I see you're gonna make me pay for all the years of hurt. 642 00:27:47,300 --> 00:27:48,700 Who wants the favor? 643 00:27:48,800 --> 00:27:51,967 And am I going to have to bend over backwards or forwards? 644 00:27:52,067 --> 00:27:55,500 [car window whirring] 645 00:27:55,600 --> 00:27:56,367 Sorry. 646 00:27:56,467 --> 00:27:57,433 [hollow thudding on window] 647 00:27:57,533 --> 00:27:59,800 Sorry. 648 00:27:59,900 --> 00:28:03,367 [car window whirring] 649 00:28:08,233 --> 00:28:12,833 Why does it matter to you what I do with my cock? 650 00:28:12,933 --> 00:28:15,500 We-- 651 00:28:16,533 --> 00:28:18,900 Wanked together. 652 00:28:19,000 --> 00:28:20,967 You're not gay, Pat. 653 00:28:21,067 --> 00:28:22,633 I would have died for you, and you were lying. 654 00:28:22,733 --> 00:28:23,667 You lied. 655 00:28:23,767 --> 00:28:25,333 You loved me being gay. 656 00:28:25,433 --> 00:28:27,267 Meant you could break away. 657 00:28:27,367 --> 00:28:29,767 Be on your own, not part of a pair. 658 00:28:29,867 --> 00:28:34,633 And then you end up with a wife who's as close as a twin. 659 00:28:34,733 --> 00:28:36,233 Is that irony? 660 00:28:36,333 --> 00:28:37,133 I can never remember. 661 00:28:37,233 --> 00:28:39,200 I'll have to look it up. 662 00:28:39,300 --> 00:28:41,433 I'll let you in on a little secret. 663 00:28:44,100 --> 00:28:46,067 I wasn't the favorite. 664 00:28:46,167 --> 00:28:47,533 She just hated me less. 665 00:28:52,600 --> 00:28:55,500 Jesus, I'd forgotten how much of a bleedin' know-all you are. 666 00:28:55,600 --> 00:28:57,200 Are you gonna help me? 667 00:29:00,833 --> 00:29:01,933 I might. 668 00:29:02,033 --> 00:29:03,600 [hollow thumping] 669 00:29:03,700 --> 00:29:05,967 And what fucking silly-arsed hoops are you gonna 670 00:29:06,067 --> 00:29:07,400 make me leap through first? 671 00:29:10,767 --> 00:29:14,100 [suspenseful music playing] 672 00:29:15,967 --> 00:29:18,033 Noel has very kindly agreed to help. 673 00:29:18,133 --> 00:29:19,033 'Bout fucking time. 674 00:29:19,133 --> 00:29:20,533 [slap thudding] 675 00:29:20,633 --> 00:29:22,733 In return, I'd like youse all to make space in your diary 676 00:29:22,833 --> 00:29:23,733 for Noel's nuptials. 677 00:29:23,833 --> 00:29:24,633 You what? 678 00:29:24,733 --> 00:29:27,700 Noel's marrying-- 679 00:29:27,800 --> 00:29:29,567 Lionel. 680 00:29:29,667 --> 00:29:33,133 PADDY: I'm giving him away, and paying for it. 681 00:29:33,233 --> 00:29:35,433 I'm really happy for you, Noel. 682 00:29:35,533 --> 00:29:38,267 Thanks. 683 00:29:38,367 --> 00:29:40,367 Nice one. 684 00:29:40,467 --> 00:29:41,533 SHANE: What ye talkin' about? 685 00:29:41,633 --> 00:29:43,333 It's two fucking blokes. 686 00:29:43,433 --> 00:29:44,267 Shut it. 687 00:29:44,367 --> 00:29:45,267 If he's keepin' me out of prison, 688 00:29:45,367 --> 00:29:47,067 he can marry a fuckin' horse. 689 00:29:47,167 --> 00:29:50,467 Not that I'd ever, ever, compare Leonard-- 690 00:29:50,567 --> 00:29:51,367 Lionel. 691 00:29:51,467 --> 00:29:52,867 Lionel. 692 00:29:52,967 --> 00:29:54,100 To a horse. 693 00:29:54,200 --> 00:29:55,167 Thanks, Pat. 694 00:29:58,100 --> 00:30:00,133 We need a dress rehearsal. 695 00:30:00,233 --> 00:30:02,367 [upbeat chord playing] 696 00:30:02,467 --> 00:30:04,933 Why do I have to be the chemist? 697 00:30:05,033 --> 00:30:07,033 SHANE: This is a robbery, motherfucker! 698 00:30:07,133 --> 00:30:08,400 NOEL: Shane, language. 699 00:30:08,500 --> 00:30:10,700 SHANE: But that's what I said last time. 700 00:30:10,800 --> 00:30:11,867 I'm sorry. (STAMMERING) I thought 701 00:30:11,967 --> 00:30:13,333 we were doing exactly the same. 702 00:30:13,433 --> 00:30:15,933 We are. 703 00:30:16,033 --> 00:30:18,200 SHANE: Open the back, or I'll chop your fuckin' hand off. 704 00:30:18,300 --> 00:30:21,833 NOEL: No, I (STAMMERING) can't do this. 705 00:30:21,933 --> 00:30:24,100 It's so violent. 706 00:30:24,200 --> 00:30:25,867 I mean, it's just not me. 707 00:30:25,967 --> 00:30:27,700 Christ on a bike! 708 00:30:27,800 --> 00:30:32,300 When you asked me to do this, and I very kindly, 709 00:30:32,400 --> 00:30:36,167 and perhaps foolishly, agreed, I assumed 710 00:30:36,267 --> 00:30:38,967 it was going to be me in prison for the evening 711 00:30:39,067 --> 00:30:40,433 pretending to be you. 712 00:30:40,533 --> 00:30:41,800 Hm? 713 00:30:41,900 --> 00:30:46,933 Now there's doing you a favor, and there's total stupidity. 714 00:30:47,033 --> 00:30:48,233 There's only so much I can do. 715 00:30:54,600 --> 00:30:56,267 OK, fine. 716 00:30:56,367 --> 00:30:57,967 Your way. 717 00:30:58,067 --> 00:30:59,600 I do the robbery. 718 00:30:59,700 --> 00:31:01,333 I take all the risk. 719 00:31:01,433 --> 00:31:02,433 [light upbeat music playing] 720 00:31:02,533 --> 00:31:03,367 Seems fair. 721 00:31:08,600 --> 00:31:11,933 STAN: See you, Yvonne. 722 00:31:12,033 --> 00:31:14,000 Just had a whisper from a [inaudible] New dealer 723 00:31:14,100 --> 00:31:16,133 we're after, small, 'bout 10. 724 00:31:16,233 --> 00:31:18,133 White, roundish face, brown hair. 725 00:31:18,233 --> 00:31:19,233 What, like him? 726 00:31:21,733 --> 00:31:22,567 Or him? 727 00:31:27,933 --> 00:31:29,067 No, like him. 728 00:31:29,167 --> 00:31:29,967 [chase music playing] 729 00:31:30,067 --> 00:31:30,900 Oi! 730 00:31:31,000 --> 00:31:33,400 Gallagher! 731 00:31:33,500 --> 00:31:34,400 Come here, you. 732 00:31:34,500 --> 00:31:35,400 Get off me! 733 00:31:40,000 --> 00:31:40,900 What's this? 734 00:31:41,000 --> 00:31:41,867 TOM: Where'd you get that, Liam? 735 00:31:41,967 --> 00:31:43,000 Sellin' fairy cakes. 736 00:31:43,100 --> 00:31:44,400 Sounds a bit far-fetched. 737 00:31:44,500 --> 00:31:46,167 It's true. 738 00:31:46,267 --> 00:31:50,000 Go home, and if you're up to bad stuff, stop now, 739 00:31:50,100 --> 00:31:51,733 d'you hear me? - No chance. 740 00:31:51,833 --> 00:31:52,633 He's nicked. 741 00:31:52,733 --> 00:31:53,833 LIAM: What, he let me go! 742 00:31:53,933 --> 00:31:55,300 CARRIE: Ain't gonna happen. 743 00:31:55,400 --> 00:31:56,133 Fairy cakes? 744 00:31:56,233 --> 00:31:57,167 What happened to questioning? 745 00:31:57,267 --> 00:31:58,300 Now look, we're lettin' him go. 746 00:31:58,400 --> 00:32:00,067 - It is quite a lot. - Get off! 747 00:32:00,167 --> 00:32:01,200 You've just blown it. 748 00:32:01,300 --> 00:32:03,600 Last chance, you're finished. 749 00:32:03,700 --> 00:32:04,667 Let him go, Wendy! 750 00:32:04,767 --> 00:32:07,600 [ominous music playing] 751 00:32:07,700 --> 00:32:08,600 Wendy? 752 00:32:08,700 --> 00:32:09,500 Who's Wendy? 753 00:32:13,467 --> 00:32:14,333 Scarper. 754 00:32:14,433 --> 00:32:15,267 STAN: Oi, kid. 755 00:32:27,200 --> 00:32:28,367 We both done wrong. 756 00:32:28,467 --> 00:32:31,167 Not obeying insane sergeant, wrist slap. 757 00:32:31,267 --> 00:32:34,600 Assuming false identity to get job in police, five years. 758 00:32:34,700 --> 00:32:36,767 So I said I was my sister. Big balumba. 759 00:32:36,867 --> 00:32:38,967 Yes, it is. 760 00:32:39,067 --> 00:32:40,333 Why? 761 00:32:40,433 --> 00:32:42,033 Failed the psychological tests. 762 00:32:42,133 --> 00:32:42,967 Not suitable. 763 00:32:43,067 --> 00:32:44,200 Joke! 764 00:32:44,300 --> 00:32:46,733 That ink spot did look like Myra Hindley. 765 00:32:46,833 --> 00:32:48,233 I'm a born copper. 766 00:32:48,333 --> 00:32:49,500 Where's your sister? 767 00:32:49,600 --> 00:32:50,400 Dead. 768 00:32:53,000 --> 00:32:55,633 TOM: Did you? 769 00:32:55,733 --> 00:32:56,800 Kill her? 770 00:32:56,900 --> 00:33:01,133 She died in a plane crash, in Africa. 771 00:33:01,233 --> 00:33:04,333 There was some confusion over the death certificate. 772 00:33:04,433 --> 00:33:06,733 That's how I got myself another shot. 773 00:33:06,833 --> 00:33:08,700 TOM: How did you pass the test? 774 00:33:08,800 --> 00:33:11,867 I learned all the answers. 775 00:33:11,967 --> 00:33:13,500 Look, I'm a sergeant. 776 00:33:13,600 --> 00:33:14,433 Everything's good. 777 00:33:14,533 --> 00:33:15,500 I'm good. 778 00:33:15,600 --> 00:33:17,367 Please, Tom. 779 00:33:17,467 --> 00:33:19,000 I live for this job, you know I do. 780 00:33:19,100 --> 00:33:20,633 I'm nothing without it. 781 00:33:20,733 --> 00:33:22,133 I don't know. 782 00:33:22,233 --> 00:33:23,533 CARRIE: I'll do anything to stay on the force, anything. 783 00:33:23,633 --> 00:33:26,133 Please. 784 00:33:26,233 --> 00:33:27,467 D'you wanna have sex with me? 785 00:33:27,567 --> 00:33:28,633 No! Yes. 786 00:33:28,733 --> 00:33:29,533 No. 787 00:33:29,633 --> 00:33:30,633 Go on. 788 00:33:30,733 --> 00:33:31,567 Any position. 789 00:33:31,667 --> 00:33:32,467 Any kink. 790 00:33:32,567 --> 00:33:33,867 Stop it! 791 00:33:33,967 --> 00:33:35,933 I don't want sex with you. 792 00:33:36,033 --> 00:33:40,067 You're all sorts of strange, bad things. 793 00:33:40,167 --> 00:33:42,433 Don't do it to me. 794 00:33:42,533 --> 00:33:43,367 Please? 795 00:33:49,600 --> 00:33:52,233 I'm beggin'. 796 00:33:52,333 --> 00:33:55,667 [tom sighs heavily] 797 00:33:56,933 --> 00:33:59,733 I can't see you thrown outta the force. 798 00:33:59,833 --> 00:34:00,667 I won't say anything. 799 00:34:04,500 --> 00:34:06,567 [DOOR CREAKING AND CLANKING SHUT] 800 00:34:06,667 --> 00:34:07,500 (QUIETLY) Yes. 801 00:34:10,533 --> 00:34:13,767 [brush scrabbling] 802 00:34:16,800 --> 00:34:19,033 Ah, another hand for the deck. 803 00:34:19,133 --> 00:34:22,433 Be like new in no time. 804 00:34:22,533 --> 00:34:23,267 JAMIE: That Victor. 805 00:34:23,367 --> 00:34:25,633 He's workin' at The Feathers. 806 00:34:25,733 --> 00:34:27,667 You haven't done anythin' yet? 807 00:34:27,767 --> 00:34:29,100 We thought we'd leave 'im a bit. 808 00:34:29,200 --> 00:34:30,967 They're the competition. 809 00:34:31,067 --> 00:34:34,133 A fire there wouldn't be bad news. 810 00:34:38,800 --> 00:34:41,600 It was me who took the money. 811 00:34:41,700 --> 00:34:43,467 [melancholy music playing] 812 00:34:43,567 --> 00:34:45,133 I'm sorry. 813 00:34:45,233 --> 00:34:47,133 I thought I could borrow it and get it back. 814 00:34:47,233 --> 00:34:48,933 I wasn't gonna nick it. 815 00:34:49,033 --> 00:34:53,400 I'm really, really fucking sorry. 816 00:34:53,500 --> 00:34:54,467 I'll pay you back. 817 00:34:54,567 --> 00:34:55,200 I'll redecorate. 818 00:34:55,300 --> 00:34:56,700 I shouldn't ha' done it. 819 00:34:56,800 --> 00:34:58,167 I'm sorry. 820 00:34:58,267 --> 00:35:00,367 You were family. 821 00:35:00,467 --> 00:35:02,233 I'm sorry. 822 00:35:02,333 --> 00:35:03,133 Keys. 823 00:35:06,900 --> 00:35:08,700 Now piss off. 824 00:35:08,800 --> 00:35:12,133 [plaintive music playing] 825 00:35:17,200 --> 00:35:19,900 [door clicking shut] 826 00:35:20,000 --> 00:35:23,500 [keys jangling on wood] 827 00:35:25,000 --> 00:35:25,900 [quiet sniffling] 828 00:35:26,000 --> 00:35:26,933 Right. 829 00:35:27,033 --> 00:35:28,333 Let's take stock. 830 00:35:28,433 --> 00:35:31,067 Now then, I've run up against society's prejudice, 831 00:35:31,167 --> 00:35:32,700 so I've earnt nothing. 832 00:35:32,800 --> 00:35:35,433 22 pounds 73. 833 00:35:35,533 --> 00:35:37,333 200. 834 00:35:37,433 --> 00:35:40,567 Minus 350. 835 00:35:40,667 --> 00:35:41,933 [debbie sighs quietly] 836 00:35:42,033 --> 00:35:45,133 Me an' Liam did it together. 837 00:35:45,233 --> 00:35:51,900 You have won 3,850 pounds! 838 00:35:52,000 --> 00:35:53,467 What the fuck! 839 00:35:53,567 --> 00:35:55,033 Fairy cakes. 840 00:35:55,133 --> 00:35:57,500 With hash in. 841 00:35:57,600 --> 00:35:58,833 You're drug dealers? 842 00:35:58,933 --> 00:36:00,567 You can use the leftover cash and pay back what you owe 843 00:36:00,667 --> 00:36:01,500 and that. 844 00:36:01,600 --> 00:36:03,133 Where'd you get the drugs to sell? 845 00:36:03,233 --> 00:36:04,467 [mischievous music playing] - You want them wholesale? 846 00:36:04,567 --> 00:36:05,800 Why not? 847 00:36:05,900 --> 00:36:07,967 You can't sell any. 848 00:36:08,067 --> 00:36:08,867 OK. 849 00:36:08,967 --> 00:36:12,400 On a very temporary basis. 850 00:36:12,500 --> 00:36:13,433 It's only dope. 851 00:36:13,533 --> 00:36:14,400 Drugs caused it. 852 00:36:14,500 --> 00:36:15,533 Dad caused it. 853 00:36:15,633 --> 00:36:17,100 Is he still in your room? 854 00:36:17,200 --> 00:36:18,300 FRANK: No, mommy. 855 00:36:18,400 --> 00:36:21,467 I don't wanna join the navy. 856 00:36:21,567 --> 00:36:22,400 Oh, shoe. 857 00:36:22,500 --> 00:36:24,633 Oh, shoe. 858 00:36:24,733 --> 00:36:25,767 Why didn't you tell me? 859 00:36:25,867 --> 00:36:26,700 'Cause you would have stopped us. 860 00:36:26,800 --> 00:36:27,867 Too fuckin' right I would! 861 00:36:27,967 --> 00:36:30,033 Well, look, there's some left. 862 00:36:30,133 --> 00:36:34,533 I'm jobless and friendless 'cause of-- 863 00:36:34,633 --> 00:36:35,500 Right. 864 00:36:35,600 --> 00:36:36,900 I'm gonna sort this out with Paddy. 865 00:36:37,000 --> 00:36:39,767 [FAST PACED SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING] 866 00:36:39,867 --> 00:36:42,600 DEBBIE: (SOFTLY) Ian, what you doing? 867 00:36:42,700 --> 00:36:44,000 I can't-- 868 00:36:44,100 --> 00:36:45,733 Debbie can't deal drugs for you any more. 869 00:36:45,833 --> 00:36:46,967 I'm stopping anyway. 870 00:36:47,067 --> 00:36:48,100 IAN: She's too-- PADDY: Mimi? 871 00:36:48,200 --> 00:36:49,333 What's goin' on? 872 00:36:49,433 --> 00:36:51,100 This little girl deals drugs for us? 873 00:36:51,200 --> 00:36:53,300 Three grand, paid. 874 00:36:53,400 --> 00:36:55,767 I'm sorry, but we're not doing any more dealin'. 875 00:36:55,867 --> 00:36:57,133 MIMI: No, temporary. 876 00:36:57,233 --> 00:36:59,333 I should've told you, Paddy. 877 00:36:59,433 --> 00:37:00,267 Mi-mo. 878 00:37:03,167 --> 00:37:05,300 You must always share with me. 879 00:37:05,400 --> 00:37:07,967 I woulda put a stop to it. 880 00:37:08,067 --> 00:37:10,833 Back to school, young lady. 881 00:37:10,933 --> 00:37:11,733 Go on. 882 00:37:15,867 --> 00:37:16,700 And you. 883 00:37:20,600 --> 00:37:23,100 Thank you very much for bringing it to my attention. 884 00:37:38,533 --> 00:37:40,833 NOEL: [sighing] You know, maybe youse 885 00:37:40,933 --> 00:37:42,200 all deserve to be in prison. 886 00:37:42,300 --> 00:37:43,767 Don't have second thoughts. 887 00:37:43,867 --> 00:37:44,867 Don't. 888 00:37:44,967 --> 00:37:45,767 Please. 889 00:37:49,867 --> 00:37:51,433 Good luck, Noel. 890 00:37:54,000 --> 00:37:55,233 Good luck, Pat. 891 00:37:55,333 --> 00:37:58,700 [suspenseful music playing] 892 00:38:00,700 --> 00:38:04,067 [distant siren wailing] 893 00:38:04,967 --> 00:38:05,900 You! 894 00:38:06,000 --> 00:38:06,967 Yes, you. 895 00:38:07,067 --> 00:38:10,600 You're a big bald-- 896 00:38:10,700 --> 00:38:12,867 Bumhole, that's what you are. 897 00:38:12,967 --> 00:38:14,000 Had a couple too many, eh Paddy? 898 00:38:14,100 --> 00:38:16,133 So what if I have, hm? 899 00:38:16,233 --> 00:38:17,800 What are you gonna do about it? 900 00:38:17,900 --> 00:38:19,533 [noel grunting] 901 00:38:19,633 --> 00:38:21,667 I've got a few too many. 902 00:38:21,767 --> 00:38:22,933 [noel grunting and cackling] 903 00:38:23,033 --> 00:38:24,533 Aw, Paddy, come on. 904 00:38:27,667 --> 00:38:31,800 NOEL: All right, what are you doing with me? 905 00:38:31,900 --> 00:38:33,200 What's he in for? 906 00:38:33,300 --> 00:38:34,433 D&D. 907 00:38:34,533 --> 00:38:36,900 Did you have any intention ever of keeping 908 00:38:37,000 --> 00:38:38,767 your side of the bargain? 909 00:38:38,867 --> 00:38:39,933 CARRIE: Of course. 910 00:38:40,033 --> 00:38:42,467 'Cause I'm not seein' muff here, am I? 911 00:38:42,567 --> 00:38:45,100 I can imagine a scenario where your career 912 00:38:45,200 --> 00:38:46,700 stutters at sergeant. 913 00:38:46,800 --> 00:38:48,100 [noel shouting drunkenly] 914 00:38:48,200 --> 00:38:50,667 [ominous music playing] 915 00:38:50,767 --> 00:38:52,067 This is a fuckin' robbery-- 916 00:38:52,167 --> 00:38:53,367 Oh, not again! 917 00:38:53,467 --> 00:38:55,067 SHANE: One false move, and you're a hand down. 918 00:38:55,167 --> 00:38:57,133 PADDY: He's all bluster. I'm the real deal. 919 00:38:57,233 --> 00:38:58,767 One word, one look, and your balls 920 00:38:58,867 --> 00:38:59,967 are in the post to your wife. 921 00:39:00,067 --> 00:39:02,100 SHANE: Get! 922 00:39:02,200 --> 00:39:03,533 CHEMIST: Please take whatever you want. 923 00:39:03,633 --> 00:39:04,667 Don't hurt me, please. 924 00:39:04,767 --> 00:39:08,233 [suspenseful music playing] 925 00:39:19,067 --> 00:39:22,200 IAN: It's everything I could get. 926 00:39:22,300 --> 00:39:25,567 For the decoratin' and the um, and the money I borrowed. 927 00:39:25,667 --> 00:39:27,100 JAMIE: Nicked. 928 00:39:27,200 --> 00:39:29,133 I can't believe I did that. 929 00:39:29,233 --> 00:39:31,167 I was so sure you'd lend it us. 930 00:39:31,267 --> 00:39:33,733 I was hurt when you didn't take the cash. 931 00:39:33,833 --> 00:39:34,733 Was your fuck you. 932 00:39:34,833 --> 00:39:35,633 IAN: No. 933 00:39:37,700 --> 00:39:39,700 I just nicked it. 934 00:39:39,800 --> 00:39:40,633 I'm sorry. 935 00:39:40,733 --> 00:39:41,800 I'm so sorry. 936 00:39:41,900 --> 00:39:42,767 We're mates. 937 00:39:42,867 --> 00:39:44,433 Turn the fucking taps off. 938 00:39:48,267 --> 00:39:51,500 We'll keep this, so just go. 939 00:39:51,600 --> 00:39:53,200 [grim music playing] 940 00:39:53,300 --> 00:39:57,000 Thought you'd know something about second chances. 941 00:39:57,100 --> 00:39:58,267 You got one. 942 00:39:58,367 --> 00:40:01,767 [plastic bag rustling] 943 00:40:01,867 --> 00:40:02,767 Got you that. 944 00:40:09,433 --> 00:40:10,233 What? 945 00:40:21,000 --> 00:40:22,933 [huffing quietly] 946 00:40:23,033 --> 00:40:25,900 PADDY: Where is he? 947 00:40:26,000 --> 00:40:28,800 Why haven't we heard anything? 948 00:40:28,900 --> 00:40:30,733 What if the cameras weren't working? 949 00:40:30,833 --> 00:40:33,000 What if he didn't get arrested? 950 00:40:33,100 --> 00:40:35,633 All sorts of things could go wrong. 951 00:40:35,733 --> 00:40:38,500 Why hasn't Fat Todd called? 952 00:40:38,600 --> 00:40:39,633 Relax. 953 00:40:39,733 --> 00:40:41,733 We've got to assume he knows what he's doing. 954 00:40:41,833 --> 00:40:44,900 [door clacking] 955 00:40:45,000 --> 00:40:46,467 Thank fuck. 956 00:40:46,567 --> 00:40:47,467 Where've you been? 957 00:40:47,567 --> 00:40:51,333 In a cell, until Fat Todd arrived. 958 00:40:51,433 --> 00:40:52,267 He's there now. 959 00:40:54,767 --> 00:40:55,667 [sighing in relief] 960 00:40:55,767 --> 00:40:59,100 [upbeat musical chord playing] 961 00:41:01,400 --> 00:41:03,700 Is it true about the CCTV? 962 00:41:03,800 --> 00:41:04,833 Yep. 963 00:41:04,933 --> 00:41:06,267 There goes the tape with the lawyer. 964 00:41:06,367 --> 00:41:08,300 Apparently, Paddy Maguire's superhuman. 965 00:41:08,400 --> 00:41:09,300 Win some-- 966 00:41:09,400 --> 00:41:10,667 We can't let him get away with it! 967 00:41:10,767 --> 00:41:12,133 It's a scam. 968 00:41:12,233 --> 00:41:13,533 Probably, but I've had a word with the boys upstairs. 969 00:41:13,633 --> 00:41:14,533 No one's interested. 970 00:41:14,633 --> 00:41:15,967 Well, they've gotta be. 971 00:41:16,067 --> 00:41:17,433 He's a villain! 972 00:41:17,533 --> 00:41:18,933 He's a major face. 973 00:41:19,033 --> 00:41:20,033 We need to nick him. 974 00:41:20,133 --> 00:41:21,967 He belongs inside. 975 00:41:22,067 --> 00:41:25,833 Do you always go all Sweeney when you're angry? 976 00:41:25,933 --> 00:41:27,967 Ask them again, please. 977 00:41:28,067 --> 00:41:29,067 I'll look a right twat. 978 00:41:29,167 --> 00:41:30,233 No, I won't. 979 00:41:30,333 --> 00:41:31,367 Ask him, and I'll have sex with you. 980 00:41:34,033 --> 00:41:34,867 Nah. 981 00:41:34,967 --> 00:41:36,567 Too late. 982 00:41:36,667 --> 00:41:39,900 WPC Flannery, now there's a woman with ambition. 983 00:41:40,000 --> 00:41:43,433 [music playing] 984 00:41:44,533 --> 00:41:47,167 CARRIE: They're dropping all charges. 985 00:41:47,267 --> 00:41:49,600 How d'you do that? 986 00:41:49,700 --> 00:41:51,767 You on CCTV and in the cell. 987 00:41:55,167 --> 00:41:58,267 CID know something's gone on, but you're 988 00:41:58,367 --> 00:42:00,900 just not big enough for them to bother putting the work in. 989 00:42:01,000 --> 00:42:04,500 That cuts me to the very core. 990 00:42:04,600 --> 00:42:07,500 I'm deeply wounded. 991 00:42:07,600 --> 00:42:09,333 What's the matter? 992 00:42:09,433 --> 00:42:11,700 You don't look too pleased for me. 993 00:42:11,800 --> 00:42:12,900 I don't want to work for you. 994 00:42:13,000 --> 00:42:13,933 PADDY: But you do. 995 00:42:14,033 --> 00:42:16,000 Tough titty. 996 00:42:16,100 --> 00:42:18,600 What if we had sex? 997 00:42:18,700 --> 00:42:20,933 Would that be quits? 998 00:42:21,033 --> 00:42:23,067 Christ, no. 999 00:42:23,167 --> 00:42:26,367 Only need one look to know you're a crap shag. 1000 00:42:26,467 --> 00:42:31,700 You're mine, in a much better way than that. 1001 00:42:31,800 --> 00:42:32,600 [door slamming] 1002 00:42:32,700 --> 00:42:36,133 [menacing music playing] 1003 00:42:38,867 --> 00:42:41,567 PRESENTER (ON TV): Just down the road from where the [inaudible] 1004 00:42:41,667 --> 00:42:42,500 What? 1005 00:42:45,033 --> 00:42:46,033 What? 1006 00:42:56,267 --> 00:42:58,500 You're a fucking twat, Ian. 1007 00:42:58,600 --> 00:42:59,967 Yeah. 1008 00:43:00,067 --> 00:43:01,267 But you're our fucking twat. 1009 00:43:04,333 --> 00:43:07,600 Will you come back? 1010 00:43:07,700 --> 00:43:09,700 You sure? 1011 00:43:09,800 --> 00:43:11,367 You really want me? 1012 00:43:11,467 --> 00:43:12,700 No. 1013 00:43:12,800 --> 00:43:16,200 We want somebody trustworthy. 1014 00:43:16,300 --> 00:43:17,367 But you'll have to do. 1015 00:43:17,467 --> 00:43:18,900 JAMIE: We're not redecoratin'. 1016 00:43:19,000 --> 00:43:20,200 We're going on holiday. 1017 00:43:20,300 --> 00:43:21,700 With your money. 1018 00:43:21,800 --> 00:43:22,833 Ibiza. 1019 00:43:22,933 --> 00:43:24,933 And we're going now. 1020 00:43:25,033 --> 00:43:27,900 JAMIE: You're late. 1021 00:43:28,000 --> 00:43:30,833 Right. 1022 00:43:30,933 --> 00:43:33,833 [ian chuckles softly] 1023 00:43:33,933 --> 00:43:34,733 [pop music playing] 1024 00:43:34,833 --> 00:43:36,200 Ian! 1025 00:43:36,300 --> 00:43:39,867 Bottles of your best burt champagne. 1026 00:43:39,967 --> 00:43:41,733 [paddy clapping and cackling] 1027 00:43:41,833 --> 00:43:43,767 I love it when a plan comes together. 1028 00:43:43,867 --> 00:43:46,100 Nice one, dad. 1029 00:43:46,200 --> 00:43:48,100 I can't stay, Pat. 1030 00:43:48,200 --> 00:43:49,500 You don't have to come to our weddin'. 1031 00:43:49,600 --> 00:43:50,733 What? 1032 00:43:50,833 --> 00:43:53,367 And I don't want you to pay for it or give me away. 1033 00:43:53,467 --> 00:43:54,300 Why not? 1034 00:43:57,867 --> 00:44:03,167 I want you to come because you want to, that's all. 1035 00:44:03,267 --> 00:44:06,667 You're invited, you all are. 1036 00:44:06,767 --> 00:44:09,733 Come if you want. 1037 00:44:09,833 --> 00:44:10,633 No. 1038 00:44:13,933 --> 00:44:17,000 It would be an honor for me to dance at your weddin'. 1039 00:44:32,567 --> 00:44:34,400 Right I'm off. 1040 00:44:38,300 --> 00:44:41,733 [noel clicking tongue] 1041 00:44:47,767 --> 00:44:48,800 Dance at his fucking weddin'? 1042 00:44:48,900 --> 00:44:52,300 [laughing hoarsely] (SINGING) YMCA, 1043 00:44:52,400 --> 00:44:54,967 it's fun to stay at the YMC-- 1044 00:44:55,067 --> 00:44:56,400 It's true then? IAN: There You go. 1045 00:44:56,500 --> 00:44:57,300 What's true? 1046 00:44:57,400 --> 00:44:58,500 The rumors. 1047 00:44:58,600 --> 00:44:59,633 What rumor? 1048 00:44:59,733 --> 00:45:03,233 Well, the CCTV of you gobblin' PC Matheson. 1049 00:45:03,333 --> 00:45:05,733 When you were in custody. 1050 00:45:05,833 --> 00:45:06,900 Was you, wasn't it? 1051 00:45:07,000 --> 00:45:07,833 [mischievous music playing] 1052 00:45:07,933 --> 00:45:11,233 [noel slurping and cackling] 1053 00:45:14,033 --> 00:45:15,567 I'm not gay. 1054 00:45:15,667 --> 00:45:16,800 SHANE: Suckin' someone off? 1055 00:45:16,900 --> 00:45:18,333 That is quite gay. 1056 00:45:18,433 --> 00:45:19,300 I'm. 1057 00:45:19,400 --> 00:45:20,900 Not. 1058 00:45:21,000 --> 00:45:22,800 Gay! 1059 00:45:22,900 --> 00:45:24,267 I'm not! 1060 00:45:24,367 --> 00:45:25,867 MIMI (VOICEOVER): There's somethin' in the gene stuff. 1061 00:45:25,967 --> 00:45:27,867 I know I love Paddy, but I love the people 1062 00:45:27,967 --> 00:45:29,233 who remind me of him, too. 1063 00:45:29,333 --> 00:45:32,067 Sons, brothers, even his mother. 1064 00:45:32,167 --> 00:45:33,633 Well, she did give birth to him. 1065 00:45:33,733 --> 00:45:37,333 Sometimes, I'm so full of love, I could kill anyone. 1066 00:45:37,433 --> 00:45:39,133 I'm not gay! 1067 00:45:39,233 --> 00:45:41,300 [chair clattering] 1068 00:45:41,400 --> 00:45:42,133 Get her. 1069 00:45:42,233 --> 00:45:45,700 [theme music playing] 1070 00:46:20,467 --> 00:46:23,800 I've had the weirdest dream. 1071 00:46:23,900 --> 00:46:26,100 You lot were in it. 1072 00:46:26,200 --> 00:46:27,967 Well, not exactly leadin' parts, but-- 1073 00:46:28,067 --> 00:46:30,767 Is that all you've got to say? 1074 00:46:30,867 --> 00:46:31,767 How you feelin'? 1075 00:46:31,867 --> 00:46:32,967 Fine. 1076 00:46:33,067 --> 00:46:35,400 Fuckin' starvin', but fine. 1077 00:46:35,500 --> 00:46:38,600 Why shouldn't I? 1078 00:46:38,700 --> 00:46:41,767 What's for brekky? 1079 00:46:41,867 --> 00:46:43,033 [spider legs skittering in pan] 1080 00:46:43,133 --> 00:46:44,800 We meet again, Gallagher. 1081 00:46:44,900 --> 00:46:45,767 [frank screaming] 1082 00:46:45,867 --> 00:46:46,700 [ominous music playing] 1083 00:46:46,800 --> 00:46:48,100 FRANK: Just say no, kids! 1084 00:46:54,700 --> 00:46:56,733 [music playing]