1 00:00:04,733 --> 00:00:07,967 FRANK: Now, nobody's saying that Chatsworth Estate is the Garden 2 00:00:08,067 --> 00:00:10,367 of Eden, but it's been a good home 3 00:00:10,467 --> 00:00:15,700 to us, to me, Frank Gallagher, and me kids, who I'm proud of. 4 00:00:15,800 --> 00:00:20,000 Because every single one of them reminds me a little of me. 5 00:00:20,100 --> 00:00:22,200 They can all think for themselves, 6 00:00:22,300 --> 00:00:23,667 which they've me to thank for. - Run! 7 00:00:23,767 --> 00:00:24,633 Run for it! - Quick! 8 00:00:24,733 --> 00:00:25,533 Leg it! 9 00:00:25,633 --> 00:00:26,500 Move it! 10 00:00:26,600 --> 00:00:28,467 FRANK: Fiona, who's a massive help-- 11 00:00:28,567 --> 00:00:31,467 Lip, who's a bit of a gobshite-- which is why nobody calls him 12 00:00:31,567 --> 00:00:32,833 Philip anymore. 13 00:00:32,933 --> 00:00:36,033 Ian-- a lot like his mam, which is handy for the others, 14 00:00:36,133 --> 00:00:37,567 'cause she's disappeared into thin air. 15 00:00:37,667 --> 00:00:40,633 And Carl-- we didn't let him grow his hair for two reasons. 16 00:00:40,733 --> 00:00:43,533 One, it stands on end and makes him look like Toya. 17 00:00:43,633 --> 00:00:44,900 Two, nits love him. 18 00:00:45,000 --> 00:00:46,133 (SCREAMING) No! (SCREAMING) No! 19 00:00:46,233 --> 00:00:48,300 FRANK: Debbie-- sent by god, total angel. 20 00:00:48,400 --> 00:00:50,700 You've to check your change but she'll go miles out 21 00:00:50,800 --> 00:00:52,133 of the way to do you a favor. 22 00:00:52,233 --> 00:00:55,200 Plus Liam-- gonna be a star, once we've 23 00:00:55,300 --> 00:00:56,867 got the fits under control. 24 00:00:56,967 --> 00:00:58,600 [liam screaming] 25 00:00:58,700 --> 00:01:00,100 Sheila-- me bird. 26 00:01:00,200 --> 00:01:01,500 Couldn't be happier. 27 00:01:01,600 --> 00:01:03,433 One plate short of a full set, like. 28 00:01:03,533 --> 00:01:06,367 Fantastic neighbors-- Kev and Veronica. 29 00:01:06,467 --> 00:01:08,667 Lend you anything-- well, not anything. 30 00:01:08,767 --> 00:01:12,600 But all of them to a man know, first and foremost, 31 00:01:12,700 --> 00:01:15,967 one of the most vital necessities in this life 32 00:01:16,067 --> 00:01:18,700 is to know how to throw a party! 33 00:01:18,800 --> 00:01:21,100 [laughter] Scatter! 34 00:01:21,200 --> 00:01:24,333 CARL: The reason everyone loves dogs is, it's dead easy 35 00:01:24,433 --> 00:01:26,067 to know what they're thinking. 36 00:01:26,167 --> 00:01:28,933 With people, it's a bit more tricky. 37 00:01:29,033 --> 00:01:30,933 KASH: State of her! 38 00:01:31,033 --> 00:01:32,667 Imagine waking up to that every morning! 39 00:01:32,767 --> 00:01:34,300 She looks like a bloke. 40 00:01:34,400 --> 00:01:38,200 [laughter] 41 00:01:38,300 --> 00:01:39,800 Thought you said you'd be ready. 42 00:01:39,900 --> 00:01:40,700 Shit. 43 00:01:40,800 --> 00:01:41,633 Sorry, Mandy. 44 00:01:41,733 --> 00:01:42,767 I lost track of time. 45 00:01:42,867 --> 00:01:43,967 Grab these two. 46 00:01:44,067 --> 00:01:45,767 I need a couple of things. 47 00:01:45,867 --> 00:01:49,067 KASH: Why do you need to carry on this charade anyway? 48 00:01:49,167 --> 00:01:50,400 Your mum thinks you're gay anyway. 49 00:01:50,500 --> 00:01:51,400 IAN: I know. 50 00:01:51,500 --> 00:01:52,667 But now, Lip's shagging her, isn't he? 51 00:02:00,600 --> 00:02:03,633 CARL: People have too many secrets. 52 00:02:03,733 --> 00:02:05,867 They're always saying things that mean something else. 53 00:02:05,967 --> 00:02:08,367 With dogs, what you see is what you get. 54 00:02:16,733 --> 00:02:18,567 [sigh] 55 00:02:18,667 --> 00:02:19,467 What's up? 56 00:02:19,567 --> 00:02:20,200 Nothing. 57 00:02:20,300 --> 00:02:26,267 I just-- Do we have to? 58 00:02:26,367 --> 00:02:29,567 I'm not really in the mood. 59 00:02:29,667 --> 00:02:31,967 Suit yourself. 60 00:02:32,067 --> 00:02:33,967 (IN PAIN) Oh! 61 00:02:34,067 --> 00:02:34,867 What was that? 62 00:02:34,967 --> 00:02:37,133 We're in deep shit. 63 00:02:37,233 --> 00:02:39,500 Well, how sure are you? 64 00:02:39,600 --> 00:02:41,767 Five weeks late. 65 00:02:41,867 --> 00:02:43,267 Five weeks? 66 00:02:43,367 --> 00:02:44,600 Kept thinking it would come. 67 00:02:49,533 --> 00:02:50,767 Got this. 68 00:02:50,867 --> 00:02:52,267 We'd best find out. 69 00:02:59,000 --> 00:03:02,800 Give us a bit of privacy then. 70 00:03:02,900 --> 00:03:04,733 [urinating] 71 00:03:06,200 --> 00:03:07,700 I used johnnies every time. 72 00:03:07,800 --> 00:03:09,033 Well, something's gone wrong. 73 00:03:13,800 --> 00:03:16,933 MANDY: Takes two minutes. 74 00:03:17,033 --> 00:03:19,733 Blue line's positive. 75 00:03:19,833 --> 00:03:22,267 [music playing] 76 00:03:33,133 --> 00:03:35,967 Is it definitely his? 77 00:03:36,067 --> 00:03:38,000 Well, it's not yours, is it? 78 00:03:38,100 --> 00:03:39,533 No, I just meant-- 79 00:03:39,633 --> 00:03:40,867 I'm not a slapper, Ian. 80 00:03:40,967 --> 00:03:43,100 [door banging] 81 00:03:43,200 --> 00:03:44,033 CARL: I'm bursting! 82 00:03:44,133 --> 00:03:44,967 Tough shit! 83 00:03:45,067 --> 00:03:45,967 Go next door! 84 00:03:46,067 --> 00:03:47,267 CARL: Martin's in there! 85 00:03:47,367 --> 00:03:48,967 It stinks! 86 00:03:49,067 --> 00:03:50,500 LIP: Use the milk bottle! 87 00:03:50,600 --> 00:03:51,400 Fuck off! 88 00:03:54,767 --> 00:03:56,233 [groaning loudly] 89 00:04:11,067 --> 00:04:13,000 Congratulations. 90 00:04:13,100 --> 00:04:15,000 You're gonna be a daddy. 91 00:04:15,100 --> 00:04:17,100 [sigh] 92 00:04:24,700 --> 00:04:26,833 Kev, pint of lager when you're ready. 93 00:04:26,933 --> 00:04:28,167 Pint, is it, love? 94 00:04:28,267 --> 00:04:30,033 What the-- who are you? 95 00:04:30,133 --> 00:04:32,100 Cassie Weston, relief manager. 96 00:04:36,833 --> 00:04:37,833 What's happened to Jez? 97 00:04:37,933 --> 00:04:39,000 CASSIE: Enforced sabbatical, love. 98 00:04:39,100 --> 00:04:40,300 Cassie's from the brewery. 99 00:04:40,400 --> 00:04:42,433 She's covering while Jez retrains. 100 00:04:42,533 --> 00:04:43,433 CASSIE: Yeah. 101 00:04:43,533 --> 00:04:45,167 The trouble with pubs, see, is, people 102 00:04:45,267 --> 00:04:47,600 start taking them for granted. 103 00:04:47,700 --> 00:04:49,033 Thing slide. 104 00:04:49,133 --> 00:04:50,400 Profits dip. 105 00:04:50,500 --> 00:04:52,767 And then, before you know it, you might as well 106 00:04:52,867 --> 00:04:54,767 be giving the beer away. 107 00:04:54,867 --> 00:04:55,700 I'm sorry. 108 00:04:55,800 --> 00:04:57,600 I didn't catch your name. 109 00:04:57,700 --> 00:04:58,533 Frank. 110 00:04:58,633 --> 00:04:59,800 Frank Gallagher. 111 00:04:59,900 --> 00:05:01,667 [alarm sound] 112 00:05:06,900 --> 00:05:08,033 Right. 113 00:05:08,133 --> 00:05:10,400 That will be one pound 90 for your lager, 114 00:05:10,500 --> 00:05:14,300 and the rest can come off your tab, 115 00:05:14,400 --> 00:05:16,200 not that it'll make much impact. 116 00:05:21,133 --> 00:05:23,600 [laughing] 117 00:05:24,967 --> 00:05:26,433 VERONICA: (LAUGHING) He totally fancied you! 118 00:05:26,533 --> 00:05:28,433 FIONA: He looked like Uncle Fester! 119 00:05:28,533 --> 00:05:31,000 [laughter] Talk about ugly tree! 120 00:05:31,100 --> 00:05:32,600 He hit every branch-- 121 00:05:32,700 --> 00:05:34,000 [laughter] 122 00:05:34,100 --> 00:05:35,400 VERONICA AND FIONA: Twice! 123 00:05:35,500 --> 00:05:38,400 FIONA: Oi, stop it, you little shit! 124 00:05:38,500 --> 00:05:39,667 Get off of me! VERONICA: Ow! 125 00:05:39,767 --> 00:05:40,567 Ow! 126 00:05:40,667 --> 00:05:41,567 Get off of her! 127 00:05:41,667 --> 00:05:43,967 [alert noise] 128 00:05:44,067 --> 00:05:45,567 You little bastard! 129 00:05:45,667 --> 00:05:47,600 [noise stops] 130 00:05:47,700 --> 00:05:49,333 FIONA: Veronica! 131 00:05:49,433 --> 00:05:50,100 Sorry. 132 00:05:50,200 --> 00:05:53,333 I thought it might help. 133 00:05:53,433 --> 00:05:55,500 Two pounds 50 that cost me. 134 00:05:55,600 --> 00:05:56,767 [groaning] 135 00:05:56,867 --> 00:05:59,067 VERONICA: You all right? 136 00:05:59,167 --> 00:06:00,800 Did it have much in it? 137 00:06:00,900 --> 00:06:02,100 FIONA: It's not the money! 138 00:06:02,200 --> 00:06:03,933 The first night I met Steve, he tried to stop 139 00:06:04,033 --> 00:06:07,067 me getting me bag nicked. 140 00:06:07,167 --> 00:06:09,333 Why does everything have to remind me of him? 141 00:06:15,367 --> 00:06:16,000 Oh! 142 00:06:16,100 --> 00:06:18,133 [urinating] 143 00:06:25,367 --> 00:06:26,800 Will she get rid of it? 144 00:06:26,900 --> 00:06:28,700 How the hell should I know? 145 00:06:28,800 --> 00:06:31,200 There's still plenty of time for an abortion. 146 00:06:31,300 --> 00:06:33,633 It's up to 16 weeks. 147 00:06:33,733 --> 00:06:35,667 She can't keep it. 148 00:06:35,767 --> 00:06:36,633 She can't. 149 00:06:42,167 --> 00:06:44,133 I wouldn't mind, I was going to knock it on the head. 150 00:06:44,233 --> 00:06:46,600 I didn't even want the sex anymore. 151 00:06:46,700 --> 00:06:47,533 What? 152 00:06:47,633 --> 00:06:48,967 It were only a jump. 153 00:06:49,067 --> 00:06:50,067 It weren't supposed to mean owt. 154 00:06:50,167 --> 00:06:51,167 She's a fuckin' Maguire. 155 00:06:58,200 --> 00:07:00,400 - Why weren't you more careful? - Than what? 156 00:07:00,500 --> 00:07:01,333 Johnnies? 157 00:07:01,433 --> 00:07:03,600 What do you use, Ian, bin liners? 158 00:07:03,700 --> 00:07:05,600 No, you use Kash's arse. 159 00:07:05,700 --> 00:07:06,533 [footsteps] 160 00:07:06,633 --> 00:07:08,000 IAN AND LIP: Piss off! 161 00:07:08,100 --> 00:07:09,900 CARL: I'm moving out of this house! 162 00:07:10,000 --> 00:07:12,033 [door slams] 163 00:07:14,767 --> 00:07:16,667 Can't you just go around to see what she's thinking? 164 00:07:16,767 --> 00:07:17,600 No way! 165 00:07:17,700 --> 00:07:19,333 You go around. 166 00:07:19,433 --> 00:07:20,533 Who am I? 167 00:07:20,633 --> 00:07:22,033 You're the one who's supposed to be shagging her. 168 00:07:25,233 --> 00:07:27,200 [baby crying] 169 00:07:29,067 --> 00:07:31,033 Can't you shut the fucking kids up? 170 00:07:34,000 --> 00:07:38,567 Sheila, where do you keep that little box with the 2p's in? 171 00:07:38,667 --> 00:07:39,867 Hey, what's going on? 172 00:07:39,967 --> 00:07:41,900 Remember that article you showed me about the dog that 173 00:07:42,000 --> 00:07:43,233 joined Mensa? 174 00:07:43,333 --> 00:07:44,500 Yeah. 175 00:07:44,600 --> 00:07:46,133 Well, on the other side, there was a piece 176 00:07:46,233 --> 00:07:48,967 about toxins in breast milk. 177 00:07:49,067 --> 00:07:52,200 Everything that goes into me goes into them. 178 00:07:52,300 --> 00:07:54,567 I'm damaging them, Frank. 179 00:07:54,667 --> 00:07:56,200 I'm damaging them! 180 00:07:56,300 --> 00:07:58,000 Wait, hey, hey, hey! 181 00:07:58,100 --> 00:07:59,400 No, no, hold on. 182 00:07:59,500 --> 00:08:01,933 Because you know, you're on this stuff for a reason. 183 00:08:02,033 --> 00:08:03,067 Eh? 184 00:08:03,167 --> 00:08:06,400 Medication, medication-- tell her. 185 00:08:06,500 --> 00:08:08,400 He's right, Mam, you can't just throw them all out. 186 00:08:08,500 --> 00:08:11,500 FRANK: You'll be climbing the fuckin' walls! 187 00:08:11,600 --> 00:08:16,467 Sometimes, Frank, we have to make sacrifices. 188 00:08:16,567 --> 00:08:17,400 Look at Joan of Arc. 189 00:08:23,400 --> 00:08:26,633 KAREN: I've got to go now, mum. 190 00:08:26,733 --> 00:08:29,733 A pint of Dog, when you're ready, please, stout yeoman. 191 00:08:32,833 --> 00:08:36,167 One pound and 90 pence. 192 00:08:39,300 --> 00:08:42,433 [sigh] That's one pound ninety off of your tap, 193 00:08:42,533 --> 00:08:44,033 ain't it, Frank? 194 00:08:44,133 --> 00:08:46,700 Hey, wait, no, no, 'cause that's not 195 00:08:46,800 --> 00:08:48,000 playing by the fucking rules. 196 00:08:48,100 --> 00:08:49,800 CASSIE: And what rules are those, Frank? 197 00:08:49,900 --> 00:08:52,467 This is a pub, not a charity. 198 00:08:52,567 --> 00:08:57,267 That's 365 pounds. 199 00:08:57,367 --> 00:08:59,500 And I want every penny back. 200 00:09:08,300 --> 00:09:09,767 Dad wants words. 201 00:09:15,167 --> 00:09:17,367 MIMI: You know why we've brought you. 202 00:09:17,467 --> 00:09:21,333 Our Mandy can't keep secrets, not from her mother. 203 00:09:21,433 --> 00:09:23,400 I only have to look in them pretty brown eyes 204 00:09:23,500 --> 00:09:25,400 to know exactly what's going on. 205 00:09:25,500 --> 00:09:26,733 Up here. 206 00:09:26,833 --> 00:09:28,133 [dog growling] 207 00:09:28,233 --> 00:09:32,600 She's very precious to us, our Mandy, 208 00:09:32,700 --> 00:09:35,433 our one and only daughter. 209 00:09:35,533 --> 00:09:37,433 And you've turned her into a woman. 210 00:09:43,200 --> 00:09:45,700 [dog panting] 211 00:09:46,700 --> 00:09:47,733 Welcome to the family. 212 00:09:47,833 --> 00:09:50,233 [laughter] 213 00:09:53,067 --> 00:09:54,933 [laughter] 214 00:09:55,033 --> 00:09:56,700 My Mimi was up the duff when we got hitched, 215 00:09:56,800 --> 00:09:58,300 don't you worry about it. 216 00:09:58,400 --> 00:10:00,133 Hey, hey! Well done! 217 00:10:00,233 --> 00:10:01,367 Here's to you, son. 218 00:10:01,467 --> 00:10:04,500 And we're gonna be grandparents! 219 00:10:04,600 --> 00:10:06,067 MIMI: Have a drink, Ian! 220 00:10:09,533 --> 00:10:10,433 Ian! 221 00:10:10,533 --> 00:10:13,100 Can I have a word? 222 00:10:13,200 --> 00:10:14,533 Tell me that you love her. 223 00:10:14,633 --> 00:10:15,900 IAN: I love her. 224 00:10:16,000 --> 00:10:17,567 Honest, Mimi, I love her. 225 00:10:17,667 --> 00:10:20,067 You'd better, Ian. 226 00:10:20,167 --> 00:10:22,333 Because she's our princess, Mandy. 227 00:10:22,433 --> 00:10:28,100 And if you ever do anything to hurt her, 228 00:10:28,200 --> 00:10:30,200 your bollocks come off. 229 00:10:30,300 --> 00:10:32,067 Come on, let's get pissed. 230 00:10:39,400 --> 00:10:40,533 IAN: What are we gonna do, Mandy? 231 00:10:44,767 --> 00:10:46,567 You could not have it. 232 00:10:46,667 --> 00:10:48,900 You could just pretend that you lost it. 233 00:10:49,000 --> 00:10:50,200 It happens all the time. 234 00:10:50,300 --> 00:10:51,833 Cindy Baler lost two kids before. 235 00:10:51,933 --> 00:10:52,800 Ian! 236 00:10:52,900 --> 00:10:55,033 We're Catholics. 237 00:10:55,133 --> 00:10:56,333 Mum's pro-life. 238 00:10:56,433 --> 00:10:58,167 She deals drugs out the back door! 239 00:10:58,267 --> 00:10:59,100 So? 240 00:11:01,833 --> 00:11:04,733 It's not the end of the world. 241 00:11:04,833 --> 00:11:07,133 It's a baby. 242 00:11:07,233 --> 00:11:09,433 We'll deal with it. 243 00:11:09,533 --> 00:11:11,767 [sobbing] 244 00:11:16,700 --> 00:11:17,867 She's gonna have it. 245 00:11:17,967 --> 00:11:19,133 There's no two ways. 246 00:11:19,233 --> 00:11:21,333 You're going to be a dad, and everyone's 247 00:11:21,433 --> 00:11:22,700 going to think it's mine! 248 00:11:22,800 --> 00:11:25,300 They've even got a list of freakin' names lined up! 249 00:11:25,400 --> 00:11:28,167 So what do you suggest, Ian? 250 00:11:28,267 --> 00:11:30,167 Announce the truth? 251 00:11:30,267 --> 00:11:32,767 Because that would mean exposing your little secret, bum boy! 252 00:11:36,833 --> 00:11:39,300 [groaning loudly] 253 00:12:05,533 --> 00:12:10,967 LIP: You know, if I got you pregnant, would you keep it? 254 00:12:11,067 --> 00:12:14,000 [laughter] 255 00:12:16,300 --> 00:12:19,100 Would you want me to? 256 00:12:19,200 --> 00:12:20,267 I don't know. 257 00:12:20,367 --> 00:12:21,100 Sort of. 258 00:12:21,200 --> 00:12:23,167 It wouldn't be so bad with you. 259 00:12:23,267 --> 00:12:25,600 You know how to sweet-talk a girl. 260 00:12:25,700 --> 00:12:28,967 You know what I mean. 261 00:12:29,067 --> 00:12:30,100 You're older. 262 00:12:30,200 --> 00:12:33,867 You know, you'd know what you wanted. 263 00:12:33,967 --> 00:12:35,267 Don't worry, Lip. 264 00:12:38,500 --> 00:12:39,633 We'll be careful. 265 00:12:59,533 --> 00:13:00,367 Oi! 266 00:13:08,200 --> 00:13:10,700 You little shit! 267 00:13:10,800 --> 00:13:13,633 CRAIG: All right, all right. 268 00:13:13,733 --> 00:13:15,167 Where's the fire? 269 00:13:15,267 --> 00:13:17,100 A kid that just legged it in here-- and don't deny it, 270 00:13:17,200 --> 00:13:18,233 because I saw him. 271 00:13:18,333 --> 00:13:19,500 He snatched me bag last night. 272 00:13:19,600 --> 00:13:23,433 I want him back, and I'm calling the police. 273 00:13:23,533 --> 00:13:24,433 Dylan! 274 00:13:24,533 --> 00:13:25,533 Out here, now! 275 00:13:28,433 --> 00:13:29,533 Caught you! 276 00:13:29,633 --> 00:13:31,000 This lady thinks she might have took your bag-- 277 00:13:31,100 --> 00:13:32,433 I don't think! He did! 278 00:13:32,533 --> 00:13:35,667 Thinks you might have taken a bag last night. 279 00:13:35,767 --> 00:13:37,033 No, she's lying. 280 00:13:37,133 --> 00:13:38,333 Why would she do that, Dylan? 281 00:13:38,433 --> 00:13:39,567 Don't know. 282 00:13:39,667 --> 00:13:42,567 But I ain't got no bag, and I ain't seen her before. 283 00:13:42,667 --> 00:13:44,133 CRAIG: Maybe you've got the wrong kid. 284 00:13:48,200 --> 00:13:50,633 Little wanker! 285 00:13:50,733 --> 00:13:52,000 Fine. 286 00:13:52,100 --> 00:13:53,600 We'll see what the police have to say about it. 287 00:14:06,567 --> 00:14:07,233 Hi. 288 00:14:07,333 --> 00:14:09,000 How are you feeling, love? 289 00:14:10,233 --> 00:14:13,833 (BREATHING HEAVILY) I feel like a new woman. 290 00:14:13,933 --> 00:14:15,967 17 hours, drug-free. 291 00:14:16,067 --> 00:14:20,000 All those pills were drugging up my system. 292 00:14:30,467 --> 00:14:33,700 Well, like Francis of Assisi said, when he got 293 00:14:33,800 --> 00:14:35,567 stigmata, one day at a time. 294 00:14:42,167 --> 00:14:44,300 KASH: Hey, Ian, fancy a break? 295 00:14:44,400 --> 00:14:45,233 No. 296 00:14:47,533 --> 00:14:48,367 All right. 297 00:14:52,400 --> 00:14:53,267 Where's Ian? 298 00:14:58,133 --> 00:14:59,300 Hey, Ian, get your coat. 299 00:14:59,400 --> 00:15:01,233 We're going to the footie. 300 00:15:01,333 --> 00:15:02,067 Hey! 301 00:15:02,167 --> 00:15:03,367 Well, look lively! 302 00:15:03,467 --> 00:15:04,367 Motor's running. 303 00:15:04,467 --> 00:15:07,167 KASH: He's, uh, supposed to be working. 304 00:15:07,267 --> 00:15:08,433 Not anymore, he isn't. 305 00:15:08,533 --> 00:15:10,600 The day he got my Mandy pregnant is the day 306 00:15:10,700 --> 00:15:13,533 he earned himself respect. 307 00:15:13,633 --> 00:15:16,400 Unless you think that doesn't apply. 308 00:15:16,500 --> 00:15:17,633 Chop-chop. 309 00:15:17,733 --> 00:15:23,767 A pint of lager-- not until I am holding it. 310 00:15:23,867 --> 00:15:35,300 [rowdy pubgoers] 311 00:15:35,400 --> 00:15:36,600 PADDY: What's he lookin' at? 312 00:15:36,700 --> 00:15:37,533 Hey! 313 00:15:37,633 --> 00:15:38,800 Want a fucking picture? 314 00:15:38,900 --> 00:15:41,267 Get him over here, Donny. 315 00:15:41,367 --> 00:15:43,133 FRANK: Hey, hey, no, it's all right. 316 00:15:43,233 --> 00:15:44,267 It's-- I'll just-- 317 00:15:44,367 --> 00:15:45,533 Ian, Ian! 318 00:15:45,633 --> 00:15:47,033 I'll come quietly. 319 00:15:47,133 --> 00:15:48,867 Jesus, Ian, Ian! 320 00:15:48,967 --> 00:15:50,833 What the fuck are you doing here? 321 00:15:50,933 --> 00:15:52,800 PADDY: Shut it! 322 00:15:52,900 --> 00:15:54,367 You know this joker, Ian? 323 00:15:54,467 --> 00:15:55,133 IAN: Yeah. 324 00:15:55,233 --> 00:15:56,433 That's my dad. 325 00:15:59,133 --> 00:16:00,600 PADDY: Granddaddy Gallagher, huh? 326 00:16:00,700 --> 00:16:02,767 [laughter] 327 00:16:04,100 --> 00:16:05,233 Yeah, well, it's a good job you've found 328 00:16:05,333 --> 00:16:08,100 a proper family to belong to. 329 00:16:08,200 --> 00:16:09,733 Was there something else? - What? 330 00:16:09,833 --> 00:16:11,033 No, I just-- 331 00:16:11,133 --> 00:16:12,233 PADDY: Well, piss off back under your stone. 332 00:16:19,400 --> 00:16:21,300 We'll get you another at The Crosses. 333 00:16:24,767 --> 00:16:27,200 [laughter] 334 00:16:39,767 --> 00:16:43,433 CRAIG: Your address was on the work pass. 335 00:16:43,533 --> 00:16:46,000 It's all about pride for kids, isn't it? 336 00:16:46,100 --> 00:16:48,700 He thinks he's street, giving it the mouth. 337 00:16:48,800 --> 00:16:50,600 He's one strike away from the young offenders. 338 00:16:50,700 --> 00:16:52,500 Shouldn't go around nicking people's bags, then. 339 00:16:52,600 --> 00:16:53,833 CRAIG: I agree. 340 00:16:53,933 --> 00:16:54,800 Stepbrother. 341 00:16:54,900 --> 00:16:56,100 Doesn't even live here. 342 00:16:56,200 --> 00:16:57,267 Just darts in when he needs a quick getaway. 343 00:17:01,933 --> 00:17:03,300 Something missing? 344 00:17:03,400 --> 00:17:04,233 Tenner. 345 00:17:06,367 --> 00:17:08,267 No, forget it. It was the bag I wanted. 346 00:17:15,067 --> 00:17:17,267 Craig, by the way. 347 00:17:17,367 --> 00:17:18,200 Fiona. 348 00:17:31,967 --> 00:17:36,567 Under what circumstances would I be called granddad? 349 00:17:40,700 --> 00:17:45,000 I'm no expert, Frank, but I'd say, when one of your kids 350 00:17:45,100 --> 00:17:45,933 has a baby. 351 00:17:46,033 --> 00:17:47,600 Exactly. 352 00:17:47,700 --> 00:17:50,400 The question is, which one? 353 00:17:50,500 --> 00:17:51,467 This one? 354 00:17:51,567 --> 00:17:53,133 Obvious choice. 355 00:17:53,233 --> 00:17:54,200 Frank, I've no idea. 356 00:17:54,300 --> 00:17:57,267 Who is our Ian's girlfriend? 357 00:17:57,367 --> 00:17:59,533 Mandy Maguire, has been for ages. 358 00:17:59,633 --> 00:18:00,433 But they're not even-- 359 00:18:03,100 --> 00:18:07,033 no, he hasn't-- oh. 360 00:18:07,133 --> 00:18:08,700 Fuckin' hell. 361 00:18:08,800 --> 00:18:11,600 Fucking granddad. 362 00:18:14,600 --> 00:18:17,533 (SINGING) My old man said, be a Man U fan. 363 00:18:17,633 --> 00:18:20,033 ALL: (SINGING) But I said, fuck off, you're a cunt. 364 00:18:20,133 --> 00:18:20,967 Oh, yeah! 365 00:18:21,067 --> 00:18:22,367 [laughter] 366 00:18:22,467 --> 00:18:23,733 DONNY: Yee-ha! 367 00:18:23,833 --> 00:18:26,500 [laughter] 368 00:18:26,600 --> 00:18:28,500 Dad, Dad, there's Vinnie MacKinnon. 369 00:18:28,600 --> 00:18:29,233 Yee-ha! 370 00:18:29,333 --> 00:18:30,800 PADDY: Catch him, son! 371 00:18:30,900 --> 00:18:31,800 All right, Vinnie? 372 00:18:31,900 --> 00:18:33,200 Hello there, Vinnie! 373 00:18:33,300 --> 00:18:34,400 PADDY: How are you doin', son? 374 00:18:34,500 --> 00:18:35,167 [car screeching] 375 00:18:35,267 --> 00:18:36,367 Hold it there, boys. 376 00:18:36,467 --> 00:18:38,933 Out you get. 377 00:18:39,033 --> 00:18:40,333 DONNY: Come on, Ian! 378 00:18:40,433 --> 00:18:41,233 Yee-ha! 379 00:18:50,833 --> 00:18:53,333 [groaning in pain] 380 00:18:56,533 --> 00:18:58,800 PADDY: People have got to learn to pay their debts, Ian. 381 00:18:58,900 --> 00:19:00,433 You're one of us now. 382 00:19:00,533 --> 00:19:06,300 Need anything sorted, say the word. 383 00:19:06,400 --> 00:19:08,300 All right, all right, all right, lads. 384 00:19:08,400 --> 00:19:10,667 Pack it in! 385 00:19:10,767 --> 00:19:13,267 Still want his mommy to recognize him, huh? 386 00:19:13,367 --> 00:19:16,033 Here, Ian, hold those. 387 00:19:16,133 --> 00:19:19,767 A Maguire takes it on the chest, beats one man! 388 00:19:19,867 --> 00:19:21,067 What a goal! 389 00:19:21,167 --> 00:19:23,200 What a goal from Patrick Maguire! 390 00:19:23,300 --> 00:19:28,767 In the dying seconds, he makes it 2-0, and that surely is it, 391 00:19:28,867 --> 00:19:32,333 the World Cup is theirs! 392 00:19:32,433 --> 00:19:33,333 DONNY: Hey, Ian! 393 00:19:33,433 --> 00:19:34,267 Come on! 394 00:19:48,900 --> 00:19:49,700 LIP: Ian? 395 00:19:49,800 --> 00:19:52,267 [ian sobbing] 396 00:19:52,367 --> 00:19:53,100 Ian! 397 00:19:53,200 --> 00:19:55,100 IAN: Piss off, Lip. 398 00:19:55,200 --> 00:19:57,700 Ian, look at me. 399 00:19:57,800 --> 00:19:59,000 Go fuck yourself. 400 00:19:59,100 --> 00:20:01,533 Look, we've got to talk about this, Ian. 401 00:20:01,633 --> 00:20:04,000 It's not just your problem, you know. 402 00:20:04,100 --> 00:20:06,133 I'm the one in this shit. 403 00:20:06,233 --> 00:20:08,000 Listen to me, you smart-ass prick. 404 00:20:08,100 --> 00:20:10,067 The hardest family on the estate, and I'm 405 00:20:10,167 --> 00:20:11,500 the fucking son-in-law. 406 00:20:11,600 --> 00:20:12,600 And why, Lip? 407 00:20:12,700 --> 00:20:13,533 Why? 408 00:20:13,633 --> 00:20:14,567 Because of you! 409 00:20:14,667 --> 00:20:16,733 LIP: Oh, like you have no part in it! 410 00:20:16,833 --> 00:20:18,000 Why have you got fake bird, Ian? 411 00:20:18,100 --> 00:20:20,833 Because it suited you! 412 00:20:20,933 --> 00:20:24,233 Because that's what you are. 413 00:20:24,333 --> 00:20:27,067 That is what you do, fucking queen. 414 00:20:32,400 --> 00:20:36,367 Well, ask me where I've been today! 415 00:20:36,467 --> 00:20:38,900 Fucking ask me! 416 00:20:39,000 --> 00:20:42,167 Football with the Maguires. 417 00:20:42,267 --> 00:20:44,367 A few beers, a bit of a laugh. 418 00:20:44,467 --> 00:20:46,233 Oh, yeah, and on the way home, we kick the living 419 00:20:46,333 --> 00:20:47,600 crap out of somebody. 420 00:20:47,700 --> 00:20:48,600 And not just kicking, Lip. 421 00:20:48,700 --> 00:20:49,867 They hammered him. 422 00:20:49,967 --> 00:20:51,600 And I mean, hammered. 423 00:20:51,700 --> 00:20:53,200 And they enjoyed it. 424 00:20:53,300 --> 00:20:54,433 I can't be part of that family, Lip. 425 00:20:54,533 --> 00:20:57,467 They're maniacs, proper fucking maniacs. 426 00:20:57,567 --> 00:20:58,700 This is your mistake! 427 00:20:58,800 --> 00:20:59,600 You live with it! 428 00:21:04,900 --> 00:21:06,167 VERONICA: Break it up! 429 00:21:06,267 --> 00:21:08,000 Pack it in, the pair of you! 430 00:21:08,100 --> 00:21:08,900 FIONA: Oi! 431 00:21:09,000 --> 00:21:10,267 Oi! 432 00:21:10,367 --> 00:21:12,567 Oi! 433 00:21:12,667 --> 00:21:14,867 LIP: Come on! 434 00:21:14,967 --> 00:21:16,300 Now, you tell me what's going on! 435 00:21:32,967 --> 00:21:33,867 Somebody better start talking. 436 00:21:33,967 --> 00:21:35,133 It's nothing to do with me. 437 00:21:40,700 --> 00:21:41,967 Must have been hidden. 438 00:21:42,067 --> 00:21:44,233 Must have come out when we were scrapping. 439 00:21:44,333 --> 00:21:46,000 Well, if it doesn't belong to either of you-- 440 00:21:46,100 --> 00:21:47,267 Fiona, me dad's here. 441 00:21:47,367 --> 00:21:50,833 He says he wants to have a word with you. 442 00:21:50,933 --> 00:21:53,000 All I'm saying is, she doesn't look like her usual self. 443 00:21:53,100 --> 00:21:54,533 Yeah. 444 00:21:54,633 --> 00:21:56,900 Well, you'd better learn to keep that out and that-- oh, here 445 00:21:57,000 --> 00:21:57,800 he is! 446 00:21:57,900 --> 00:21:59,000 Mr. Big Shot! 447 00:21:59,100 --> 00:22:01,667 Mr. Friend-of-the-fucking-Maguires! 448 00:22:01,767 --> 00:22:05,367 Well, you'd better tell us your big secret, Mr. Big Shot. 449 00:22:05,467 --> 00:22:06,500 Because I thought it was just me, 450 00:22:06,600 --> 00:22:08,900 but no other fucker seems to know! 451 00:22:09,000 --> 00:22:10,300 Leave him alone, Dad! 452 00:22:10,400 --> 00:22:13,633 He doesn't have to tell us until he's ready! 453 00:22:13,733 --> 00:22:14,633 What are you on about? 454 00:22:14,733 --> 00:22:15,833 He's got some bird up the duff. 455 00:22:15,933 --> 00:22:16,833 We've got a right to know! 456 00:22:16,933 --> 00:22:18,067 Especially that slapper! 457 00:22:22,967 --> 00:22:24,100 Fuck off! 458 00:22:24,200 --> 00:22:25,700 Just fuck off, the lot of you! 459 00:22:25,800 --> 00:22:28,933 Just leave me alone! 460 00:22:29,033 --> 00:22:30,467 Can I have his haddock? 461 00:22:35,233 --> 00:22:37,400 CASSIE: What can we do to put a smile on them chops? 462 00:22:38,500 --> 00:22:39,600 FRANK: Chuck yourself off a bridge. 463 00:22:39,700 --> 00:22:40,567 CASSIE: Come on. 464 00:22:40,667 --> 00:22:41,533 You don't mean that, Frank. 465 00:22:45,200 --> 00:22:50,200 FRANK: I just found out my son is going to have a kiddie. 466 00:22:50,300 --> 00:22:54,700 15-year-old lad got his girlfriend lumbered. 467 00:22:54,800 --> 00:23:00,833 He's just tossed his life away before it's started. 468 00:23:00,933 --> 00:23:04,100 What's the sodden world coming to? 469 00:23:04,200 --> 00:23:06,533 This isn't about him at all, is it, Frank? 470 00:23:09,333 --> 00:23:11,933 Hey, bet you don't look at me and think grandma. 471 00:23:12,033 --> 00:23:13,467 [chuckle] 472 00:23:13,567 --> 00:23:15,033 It don't mean you've got to start wearing zip-up slippers, 473 00:23:15,133 --> 00:23:16,133 you know? 474 00:23:33,133 --> 00:23:34,600 Tell you what. 475 00:23:37,667 --> 00:23:39,533 I'll buy you a drink. 476 00:24:05,367 --> 00:24:08,000 Hey. Thought we should have a talk. 477 00:24:08,100 --> 00:24:11,000 What for? 478 00:24:11,100 --> 00:24:12,300 Because we never do. 479 00:24:12,400 --> 00:24:13,200 So? 480 00:24:17,400 --> 00:24:21,667 Carl, they'll still love you, you know, no matter what. 481 00:24:24,767 --> 00:24:27,400 It's Nothing to be ashamed of. 482 00:24:27,500 --> 00:24:28,333 What isn't? 483 00:24:37,967 --> 00:24:38,900 That's not mine. 484 00:24:39,000 --> 00:24:39,800 It's gay! 485 00:24:44,867 --> 00:24:47,333 [knocking on the door] 486 00:24:48,833 --> 00:24:52,933 Dylan sent you these as an apology. 487 00:24:53,033 --> 00:24:54,067 Dylan sent them? 488 00:24:57,733 --> 00:24:58,600 OK. 489 00:24:58,700 --> 00:25:02,167 It might have been my idea. 490 00:25:02,267 --> 00:25:03,733 Tell me to piss off if you want. 491 00:25:03,833 --> 00:25:05,033 No. 492 00:25:05,133 --> 00:25:06,100 I appreciate it. 493 00:25:09,300 --> 00:25:12,633 They're beautiful. 494 00:25:12,733 --> 00:25:13,567 Oh. 495 00:25:17,667 --> 00:25:18,500 It's a long story. 496 00:25:21,900 --> 00:25:23,333 Do you fancy a drink? 497 00:25:28,600 --> 00:25:30,867 You're gonna have to tell them, Ian. 498 00:25:30,967 --> 00:25:31,933 It's the only way out of it. 499 00:25:32,033 --> 00:25:33,600 - The Maguires? - Kash! 500 00:25:33,700 --> 00:25:36,167 I know, it's just, what do you think they're going to say? 501 00:25:36,267 --> 00:25:38,167 They'll hate him for it. 502 00:25:38,267 --> 00:25:39,500 He won't just be a liar. 503 00:25:39,600 --> 00:25:41,467 He'll be a queer liar. 504 00:25:41,567 --> 00:25:43,833 So what's your advice? 505 00:25:43,933 --> 00:25:45,300 Live a lie? 506 00:25:45,400 --> 00:25:46,233 Marriage? 507 00:25:46,333 --> 00:25:47,167 Kids? 508 00:25:50,200 --> 00:25:52,233 Mandy's a nice girl, Ian. 509 00:25:52,333 --> 00:25:54,300 You can't do that to her. 510 00:25:54,400 --> 00:25:55,633 You can't do that to yourself. 511 00:25:59,033 --> 00:26:01,933 You're not doing the honorable thing. 512 00:26:02,033 --> 00:26:06,633 You're just ruining everyone's life. 513 00:26:06,733 --> 00:26:09,600 [dogs barking] 514 00:26:24,900 --> 00:26:28,567 So [clears throat] there's no mum. 515 00:26:28,667 --> 00:26:32,000 She pissed off years ago and moved in with another woman. 516 00:26:32,100 --> 00:26:33,600 What, moved in, moved in? 517 00:26:33,700 --> 00:26:34,533 (LAUGHING) Yes. 518 00:26:34,633 --> 00:26:36,600 [laughter] Sorry. 519 00:26:36,700 --> 00:26:39,033 You can't say she didn't give being straight a decent shot. 520 00:26:39,133 --> 00:26:41,667 I mean, what, six kids? 521 00:26:41,767 --> 00:26:42,567 Who's the bloke? 522 00:26:46,033 --> 00:26:47,233 [door opens and shuts] 523 00:26:47,333 --> 00:26:48,000 Sorry. 524 00:26:48,100 --> 00:26:49,533 Grab another drink. 525 00:26:49,633 --> 00:26:51,167 Ian? 526 00:26:51,267 --> 00:26:53,900 Don't want to talk about it. 527 00:26:54,000 --> 00:26:55,600 FIONA: OK. 528 00:26:55,700 --> 00:26:56,633 You know I'm here when you do. 529 00:27:01,133 --> 00:27:04,100 Listen, I should get back. 530 00:27:07,267 --> 00:27:08,067 No. 531 00:27:12,633 --> 00:27:13,467 Stay. 532 00:27:23,967 --> 00:27:26,033 CASSIE: He writes me these letters, 533 00:27:26,133 --> 00:27:28,933 begging, pleading with me to stand by him. 534 00:27:29,033 --> 00:27:30,200 [patrick chuckling nervously] 535 00:27:30,300 --> 00:27:32,333 I wouldn't mind, but he's doing life. 536 00:27:32,433 --> 00:27:34,900 [patrick chuckling nervously] 537 00:27:35,000 --> 00:27:36,967 You get lonely, though, Frank-- 538 00:27:37,067 --> 00:27:41,667 all them nights, sleeping on your own. 539 00:27:41,767 --> 00:27:42,967 Yeah, yeah. 540 00:27:43,067 --> 00:27:44,433 I'm the same, you know, single bloke on me own. 541 00:27:44,533 --> 00:27:47,500 It's not easy. 542 00:27:47,600 --> 00:27:48,900 Yeah. 543 00:27:49,000 --> 00:27:51,300 Sometimes, all you want is the warmth 544 00:27:51,400 --> 00:27:54,067 of another body next to yours. 545 00:27:59,400 --> 00:28:02,033 CASSIE: Do you fancy clearing that bar tap, Frank? 546 00:28:02,133 --> 00:28:03,500 Does the pope shit in the woods? 547 00:28:13,800 --> 00:28:17,867 We're talking all of it. 548 00:28:17,967 --> 00:28:19,633 Like it never existed. 549 00:28:29,467 --> 00:28:30,733 You two get off. 550 00:28:30,833 --> 00:28:32,100 I'll finish up here. 551 00:28:37,567 --> 00:28:38,567 No, no, no way! 552 00:28:38,667 --> 00:28:41,367 Look, she's going to clear the whole lot! 553 00:28:41,467 --> 00:28:42,700 Tap gone! 554 00:28:42,800 --> 00:28:45,033 350 smackers vanished! 555 00:28:45,133 --> 00:28:46,633 For sex with you? 556 00:28:46,733 --> 00:28:49,033 Shut up! 557 00:28:49,133 --> 00:28:50,267 What about Sheila? 558 00:28:50,367 --> 00:28:53,033 You can't fucking shag someone for money! 559 00:28:53,133 --> 00:28:54,900 That's scraping it, even by your standards. 560 00:28:55,000 --> 00:28:58,033 Hello, that's why I need you to spring me! 561 00:28:58,133 --> 00:29:01,633 Look, just, you know, feel her up a bit, 562 00:29:01,733 --> 00:29:03,067 get the motor running. 563 00:29:03,167 --> 00:29:05,467 Then, wham! 564 00:29:05,567 --> 00:29:09,067 Kevus interruptus. 565 00:29:09,167 --> 00:29:10,033 Oh, fuck it. 566 00:29:10,133 --> 00:29:11,033 You owe me for this, Frank. 567 00:29:11,133 --> 00:29:12,433 We're talking big time. 568 00:29:18,900 --> 00:29:23,333 [cassie moaning] 569 00:29:23,433 --> 00:29:24,167 Whoa, whoa! 570 00:29:24,267 --> 00:29:25,700 Whoa, whoa, whoa! 571 00:29:25,800 --> 00:29:28,367 Cassie, Cassie, Cassie. 572 00:29:28,467 --> 00:29:32,067 Why don't we take it nice and slow? 573 00:29:32,167 --> 00:29:33,000 Fuck that. 574 00:29:33,100 --> 00:29:34,100 I want you in me. 575 00:29:36,967 --> 00:29:37,867 FRANK: Oh, god! 576 00:29:37,967 --> 00:29:39,400 I want you! 577 00:29:39,500 --> 00:29:41,233 Oh, I want you! 578 00:29:41,333 --> 00:29:42,500 Now! 579 00:29:42,600 --> 00:29:43,433 Now! 580 00:29:45,833 --> 00:29:46,967 CASSIE: Suck them! 581 00:29:47,067 --> 00:29:47,933 Oh! 582 00:29:48,033 --> 00:29:49,100 Oh! 583 00:29:49,200 --> 00:29:50,700 FRANK: You want me to suck your tits? 584 00:29:50,800 --> 00:29:52,633 CASSIE: I want you to bang me. 585 00:29:52,733 --> 00:29:53,600 Treat me rough. 586 00:29:53,700 --> 00:29:54,967 I want you to spit on me. 587 00:29:55,067 --> 00:29:58,800 [grunting] 588 00:29:58,900 --> 00:30:00,033 See, Cassie, no! 589 00:30:00,133 --> 00:30:01,433 Cassie, I can't do this. CASSIE: You can-- 590 00:30:01,533 --> 00:30:02,267 No, fuck! 591 00:30:02,367 --> 00:30:03,900 It's not that I don't want to. 592 00:30:04,000 --> 00:30:05,033 I'd love to. 593 00:30:05,133 --> 00:30:06,767 Are you playing hard-to-get, Frank? 594 00:30:06,867 --> 00:30:09,233 We'll see about that! 595 00:30:09,333 --> 00:30:09,967 No. 596 00:30:10,067 --> 00:30:10,933 No. 597 00:30:11,033 --> 00:30:18,200 Wait-- [groaning] Oh, oh oh. 598 00:30:18,300 --> 00:30:20,633 [glass shattering] 599 00:30:20,733 --> 00:30:21,800 CASSIE: What the! 600 00:30:21,900 --> 00:30:23,067 What are the fucking chances of that? 601 00:30:23,167 --> 00:30:25,000 Come back here, you bastards! 602 00:30:25,100 --> 00:30:26,800 Two lads, druggies-- I just seen them 603 00:30:26,900 --> 00:30:27,967 running off towards the park! 604 00:30:28,067 --> 00:30:29,167 CASSIE: Right! 605 00:30:29,267 --> 00:30:30,733 I'm calling the police! 606 00:30:36,167 --> 00:30:37,767 FRANK: Big help you were! 607 00:30:37,867 --> 00:30:39,667 You got out of it, didn't you? 608 00:30:39,767 --> 00:30:41,333 Fucking come here! 609 00:30:41,433 --> 00:30:43,533 KAREN: She was all over you! 610 00:30:43,633 --> 00:30:44,900 No! 611 00:30:45,000 --> 00:30:46,567 You can't keep that out of other people's business, can you? 612 00:30:46,667 --> 00:30:47,600 We had a plan! 613 00:30:47,700 --> 00:30:48,800 We had it all sorted out till you came 614 00:30:48,900 --> 00:30:50,200 along and fucked it all up! 615 00:30:50,300 --> 00:30:53,133 Frank, she was sucking you off! 616 00:30:53,233 --> 00:30:55,733 I wouldn't say, sucking. 617 00:30:55,833 --> 00:30:57,567 Do you know your problem, Frank? 618 00:30:57,667 --> 00:30:59,300 You never think about anyone but yourself. 619 00:30:59,400 --> 00:31:00,733 You never take any responsibility 620 00:31:00,833 --> 00:31:01,933 for your actions. 621 00:31:02,033 --> 00:31:04,100 Oh, you're like a pathetic little kid! 622 00:31:04,200 --> 00:31:07,400 Takes one to know one! 623 00:31:07,500 --> 00:31:10,567 Touch her again, and I'll ruin your life. 624 00:31:10,667 --> 00:31:11,467 [chuckle] 625 00:31:11,567 --> 00:31:13,367 KAREN: I mean it, Frank. 626 00:31:13,467 --> 00:31:18,200 Me mum, the house, the kids-- 627 00:31:18,300 --> 00:31:20,200 you'll lose the lot. 628 00:31:30,667 --> 00:31:33,133 [baby cooing] 629 00:31:36,667 --> 00:31:38,133 FRANK: What's up with you? 630 00:31:42,067 --> 00:31:44,533 It's the twins. 631 00:31:44,633 --> 00:31:46,533 The twins. 632 00:31:46,633 --> 00:31:47,533 FRANK: What? 633 00:31:47,633 --> 00:31:49,933 What's wrong with them? 634 00:31:50,033 --> 00:31:50,933 Here we go. 635 00:31:51,033 --> 00:31:51,933 SHEILA: Christ, they're evil! 636 00:31:52,033 --> 00:31:53,500 They're evil! 637 00:31:53,600 --> 00:31:56,067 [pigs squealing] 638 00:32:12,533 --> 00:32:13,833 Don't touch me! 639 00:32:13,933 --> 00:32:17,433 Don't touch me! 640 00:32:17,533 --> 00:32:19,833 [screaming] 641 00:32:19,933 --> 00:32:22,400 [babies crying] 642 00:32:24,633 --> 00:32:25,633 Who'd have kids? 643 00:32:52,033 --> 00:32:52,933 Hey. 644 00:32:53,033 --> 00:32:56,767 You should have woken me. 645 00:32:56,867 --> 00:32:57,700 You OK? 646 00:33:01,367 --> 00:33:03,433 Gotta get the kids ready for school and then off to work, 647 00:33:03,533 --> 00:33:04,333 so-- 648 00:33:06,700 --> 00:33:08,400 Should I use the door, or would you rather I 649 00:33:08,500 --> 00:33:10,033 disappeared in a puff of smoke? 650 00:33:16,233 --> 00:33:17,100 [knocking on door] 651 00:33:17,200 --> 00:33:18,633 FIONA: Here's your dinner money. 652 00:33:18,733 --> 00:33:20,100 That's for your trip. 653 00:33:22,733 --> 00:33:23,567 All right. 654 00:33:23,667 --> 00:33:26,133 Is your Ian in? 655 00:33:26,233 --> 00:33:29,967 Engaged party, tomorrow night. 656 00:33:30,067 --> 00:33:33,633 Mum thinks everyone should meet. 657 00:33:33,733 --> 00:33:35,333 See you later, sweetheart. 658 00:33:38,067 --> 00:33:40,500 I've asked her to marry me. 659 00:33:40,600 --> 00:33:44,867 Does that mean we'll be related? 660 00:33:44,967 --> 00:33:45,800 Speak for yourself. 661 00:33:48,833 --> 00:33:49,667 Hey! 662 00:33:49,767 --> 00:33:53,367 Are you right in the head? 663 00:33:53,467 --> 00:33:54,967 - I have no option. - What are you on about? 664 00:33:55,067 --> 00:33:55,867 You can't marry! 665 00:33:55,967 --> 00:33:57,100 You're fucking gay! 666 00:33:59,700 --> 00:34:01,467 Went around last night to talk to her parents, 667 00:34:01,567 --> 00:34:03,167 and I was gonna tell them the truth. 668 00:34:03,267 --> 00:34:05,767 About everything. 669 00:34:05,867 --> 00:34:07,567 But the words wouldn't come out! 670 00:34:07,667 --> 00:34:08,367 They thought I was nervous. 671 00:34:08,467 --> 00:34:10,500 They started talking for me. 672 00:34:10,600 --> 00:34:12,233 Before I knew it, I was getting engaged. 673 00:34:12,333 --> 00:34:14,133 They even gave us a bleeding ring! 674 00:34:17,267 --> 00:34:18,733 You can't do it, Ian. 675 00:34:21,567 --> 00:34:23,200 I've no fucking choice! 676 00:34:43,800 --> 00:34:45,667 What do you want? 677 00:34:45,767 --> 00:34:47,100 Engagement party. 678 00:34:47,200 --> 00:34:48,367 Why are you doing this, Mandy? 679 00:34:48,467 --> 00:34:49,667 He's a better man than you. 680 00:34:49,767 --> 00:34:51,900 Oh, what, are you going to let him marry you? 681 00:34:52,000 --> 00:34:53,633 Mandy, what do you want? 682 00:34:53,733 --> 00:34:55,100 Lip, nothing I want to hear. 683 00:34:55,200 --> 00:34:56,067 What do you mean? 684 00:34:56,167 --> 00:35:00,033 It's my baby! 685 00:35:00,133 --> 00:35:04,667 Ian's brother offering his congratulations. 686 00:35:10,700 --> 00:35:13,167 [yelling in frustration] 687 00:35:24,367 --> 00:35:26,300 Jesus, it's like, meet the mob. 688 00:35:29,900 --> 00:35:30,967 Pleased to meet you. 689 00:35:31,067 --> 00:35:32,133 I'm Mimi. 690 00:35:32,233 --> 00:35:33,367 This is Patrick. 691 00:35:33,467 --> 00:35:34,600 Fiona. 692 00:35:34,700 --> 00:35:35,800 Me dad, Frank. 693 00:35:35,900 --> 00:35:36,733 PADDY: We've met. 694 00:35:36,833 --> 00:35:37,633 FRANK: Yeah. 695 00:35:37,733 --> 00:35:38,833 Happy occasion, eh? 696 00:35:38,933 --> 00:35:41,100 Two families joined together by love. 697 00:35:41,200 --> 00:35:42,333 LIP: You can't go through with this. 698 00:35:42,433 --> 00:35:44,100 FRANK: Just like Romeo and Juliet, innit? 699 00:35:44,200 --> 00:35:47,400 Except, you know, without the suicides. 700 00:35:47,500 --> 00:35:49,367 That Shakespeare was no comedy writer, was he? 701 00:35:49,467 --> 00:35:51,400 PADDY: Let the celebrations commence! 702 00:35:51,500 --> 00:35:52,933 FRANK: Yay! 703 00:35:53,033 --> 00:35:53,900 PADDY: Come on! 704 00:35:54,000 --> 00:35:55,600 Pile into the car! 705 00:35:55,700 --> 00:35:57,033 Plenty of room! 706 00:35:57,133 --> 00:35:58,633 Screens up, screens up. 707 00:35:58,733 --> 00:35:59,933 Room for a little one? 708 00:36:00,033 --> 00:36:00,900 Yeah. 709 00:36:01,000 --> 00:36:03,100 If you don't mind the boot. 710 00:36:03,200 --> 00:36:04,267 Don't do this to yourself! 711 00:36:07,367 --> 00:36:08,633 I've changed my mind. 712 00:36:14,100 --> 00:36:16,567 [party music playing] 713 00:36:55,167 --> 00:36:56,067 PADDY: Come on, ladies! 714 00:36:56,167 --> 00:36:57,833 Let's have a dance! 715 00:36:57,933 --> 00:36:59,167 FIONA: We're all right here, thanks! 716 00:36:59,267 --> 00:37:00,333 PADDY: That wasn't a question. 717 00:37:09,533 --> 00:37:11,033 I thought your family were bad. 718 00:37:11,133 --> 00:37:13,400 But they're like the Windsors compared to this lot. 719 00:37:13,500 --> 00:37:14,733 Well, this is what happens when 720 00:37:14,833 --> 00:37:16,267 Willie don't wear a rain hat. 721 00:37:24,800 --> 00:37:27,033 PADDY: Everybody, can I have your attention, please? 722 00:37:27,133 --> 00:37:30,200 Pray silence for the master of ceremonies. 723 00:37:30,300 --> 00:37:33,733 Now, then, as the old saying goes, 724 00:37:33,833 --> 00:37:37,033 we're not so much losing a daughter as gaining a son. 725 00:37:37,133 --> 00:37:39,300 And we want our Mandy to be happy, 726 00:37:39,400 --> 00:37:41,500 and I know this young fellow is going to make her happy. 727 00:37:41,600 --> 00:37:42,500 You'd better hide. 728 00:37:42,600 --> 00:37:43,900 Because if he doesn't, I'll kill him. 729 00:37:44,000 --> 00:37:45,767 [laughter] 730 00:37:48,167 --> 00:37:50,733 There's a young baby on the way, and I know he's 731 00:37:50,833 --> 00:37:52,633 going to make a great father. 732 00:37:52,733 --> 00:37:55,233 So I want you all to raise your glasses for a toast. 733 00:37:58,200 --> 00:38:00,667 To Mandy and Ian! 734 00:38:00,767 --> 00:38:03,600 To Mandy and Ian! 735 00:38:03,700 --> 00:38:05,967 [cheering] 736 00:38:06,067 --> 00:38:07,933 Call it off! 737 00:38:08,033 --> 00:38:11,033 [cheering] 738 00:38:12,533 --> 00:38:14,667 Call it off! 739 00:38:14,767 --> 00:38:15,600 Call it off. 740 00:38:15,700 --> 00:38:18,233 The whole thing's a joke. 741 00:38:18,333 --> 00:38:19,367 Donny, get him out of here. 742 00:38:26,633 --> 00:38:27,733 The baby's mine. 743 00:38:30,967 --> 00:38:33,200 MANDY: Sorry. 744 00:38:33,300 --> 00:38:36,000 I should have told you, Ian. 745 00:38:36,100 --> 00:38:38,067 [mandy groaning] 746 00:38:40,867 --> 00:38:42,400 You bastard! 747 00:38:42,500 --> 00:38:44,200 [people yelling] 748 00:38:44,300 --> 00:38:45,333 VERONICA: Back off! 749 00:38:45,433 --> 00:38:46,333 Ian! 750 00:38:46,433 --> 00:38:47,300 Ian, Ian! 751 00:38:59,067 --> 00:39:00,533 Tell me you're lying. 752 00:39:07,567 --> 00:39:10,133 Tell me you're lying. 753 00:39:10,233 --> 00:39:12,267 [lip groaning in pain] 754 00:39:12,367 --> 00:39:13,700 FIONA: Get your hands off of him! 755 00:39:13,800 --> 00:39:15,033 Your baby brother, eh? 756 00:39:15,133 --> 00:39:17,000 [people yelling] 757 00:39:17,100 --> 00:39:17,933 MANDY: Stop it, please! 758 00:39:18,033 --> 00:39:18,933 It's my fault! 759 00:39:19,033 --> 00:39:20,100 It's my fault! 760 00:39:27,000 --> 00:39:28,333 CASSIE: Break it up, the lot of you! 761 00:39:28,433 --> 00:39:32,367 All of you, out of my pub, now! 762 00:39:32,467 --> 00:39:35,533 Oh, you don't scare me, love. 763 00:39:35,633 --> 00:39:37,533 [cassie groaning in pain] 764 00:39:42,433 --> 00:39:44,333 Look at the state of him. 765 00:39:44,433 --> 00:39:45,733 You're a bleeding animal. 766 00:39:49,633 --> 00:39:53,133 I'm so sorry. 767 00:39:53,233 --> 00:39:54,200 Really sorry. 768 00:40:00,100 --> 00:40:03,933 [screaming] They've got the baby! 769 00:40:04,033 --> 00:40:05,933 They've got the baby! 770 00:40:06,033 --> 00:40:07,067 KAREN: Fucking do something! 771 00:40:07,167 --> 00:40:09,100 (SCREAMING) They've got the baby! 772 00:40:14,100 --> 00:40:16,000 CASSIE: You bloody wanker! 773 00:40:16,100 --> 00:40:19,767 You're barred! 774 00:40:19,867 --> 00:40:23,467 Gallaghers, nothing but scum. 775 00:40:26,033 --> 00:40:28,433 PADDY: Stay the fuck away from this baby. 776 00:40:28,533 --> 00:40:31,500 It's got nothing to do with you cunts anymore. 777 00:40:38,367 --> 00:40:39,033 Scum! 778 00:40:39,133 --> 00:40:39,933 PADDY: Come on, everybody. 779 00:40:40,033 --> 00:40:40,900 Get a drink. 780 00:40:41,000 --> 00:40:42,000 Don't waste all this drink. 781 00:40:42,100 --> 00:40:45,933 Come on, we're the fucking Irish! 782 00:40:46,033 --> 00:40:52,000 [yelling] Fuck all of you! 783 00:40:52,100 --> 00:40:53,100 Welcome back. 784 00:41:11,867 --> 00:41:12,700 Thanks. 785 00:41:16,567 --> 00:41:17,833 Did they hurt you? 786 00:41:17,933 --> 00:41:18,733 Yeah, right. 787 00:41:21,300 --> 00:41:22,633 Felt like an effeminate chimp. 788 00:41:25,033 --> 00:41:26,400 Couldn't let you go through with it, Ian. 789 00:41:29,700 --> 00:41:32,100 You were gonna chuck your life away because of my mistake. 790 00:41:36,367 --> 00:41:39,800 You've made yourself the villain. 791 00:41:39,900 --> 00:41:41,700 They're gonna hate you for it. 792 00:41:41,800 --> 00:41:43,233 Yeah. 793 00:41:43,333 --> 00:41:44,600 Well, that's just something we'll just have to live with. 794 00:41:52,533 --> 00:41:54,067 Don't 795 00:41:54,167 --> 00:41:55,000 Don't worry. 796 00:41:55,100 --> 00:41:56,500 I'm not staying. 797 00:41:56,600 --> 00:41:58,367 You should be ashamed of yourself. 798 00:42:36,500 --> 00:42:37,300 I need a favor. 799 00:42:40,633 --> 00:42:42,567 Don't hate Lip. 800 00:42:42,667 --> 00:42:46,500 You can't hate him, because I knew all along about him 801 00:42:46,600 --> 00:42:47,800 and Mandy. 802 00:42:47,900 --> 00:42:50,367 And what about the baby? 803 00:42:50,467 --> 00:42:54,200 There was no way it could be mine. 804 00:42:54,300 --> 00:42:56,800 And yet, you were gonna go along with it? 805 00:42:56,900 --> 00:42:58,300 The engagement and the wedding? 806 00:43:17,600 --> 00:43:18,900 Mandy was my cover. 807 00:43:19,000 --> 00:43:20,100 We'd never even done it. 808 00:43:22,867 --> 00:43:25,433 Don't tell anyone. 809 00:43:25,533 --> 00:43:27,567 Please, Fiona, don't tell anyone. 810 00:44:02,000 --> 00:44:02,933 Look, it wasn't you. 811 00:44:03,033 --> 00:44:04,067 OK? 812 00:44:04,167 --> 00:44:06,433 I just can't get into all that again. 813 00:44:06,533 --> 00:44:07,333 All that? 814 00:44:13,400 --> 00:44:14,533 He broke your heart, yeah? 815 00:44:14,633 --> 00:44:16,867 And you still love him? 816 00:44:16,967 --> 00:44:19,400 That guy in the picture? 817 00:44:22,433 --> 00:44:23,300 I'm sorry. 818 00:44:26,767 --> 00:44:27,633 I was just lonely. 819 00:44:34,133 --> 00:44:37,933 I hardly even know you. 820 00:44:38,033 --> 00:44:39,200 Ain't that the point? 821 00:44:43,233 --> 00:44:46,133 LIP: I never imagined I'd have a kid at this age. 822 00:44:46,233 --> 00:44:48,300 It's what all the fuck-ups do. 823 00:44:48,400 --> 00:44:49,967 Shag some bird, and then piss off and leave 824 00:44:50,067 --> 00:44:51,900 someone else to bring it up. 825 00:44:52,000 --> 00:44:54,700 CSA chasing them for money. 826 00:44:54,800 --> 00:44:56,100 Except, now I am the fuck-up. 827 00:45:01,267 --> 00:45:04,033 She were a good jump, though. 828 00:45:04,133 --> 00:45:06,200 I see you two have kissed and made up. 829 00:45:06,300 --> 00:45:10,000 FRANK: Look who's found her marbles! 830 00:45:10,100 --> 00:45:11,800 SHEILA: The doctors said I should have 831 00:45:11,900 --> 00:45:13,567 never come off the Seroxin. 832 00:45:13,667 --> 00:45:14,400 Hi, you two. 833 00:45:14,500 --> 00:45:16,567 Oh, what's the matter, baby? 834 00:45:16,667 --> 00:45:18,967 Were you missing your daddy? 835 00:45:19,067 --> 00:45:19,967 Oh! 836 00:45:20,067 --> 00:45:21,267 No, give it to him. 837 00:45:21,367 --> 00:45:22,633 It'll be good practice. 838 00:45:22,733 --> 00:45:23,933 Hey, who fancies a beer? 839 00:45:24,033 --> 00:45:25,467 Courtesy of Sheila. 840 00:45:25,567 --> 00:45:28,033 They broke the mould after you, love, didn't they? 841 00:45:28,133 --> 00:45:30,600 Keep taking the tablets. 842 00:45:30,700 --> 00:45:31,600 Hello, Carol! 843 00:45:31,700 --> 00:45:33,000 CAROL: Oh, surprise. 844 00:45:33,100 --> 00:45:35,567 Sheila! 845 00:45:35,667 --> 00:45:36,833 Sheila! 846 00:45:36,933 --> 00:45:38,667 [THEME - THE DANDY WARHOLDS, "WE USED TO BE FRIENDS"] 847 00:45:38,767 --> 00:45:41,400 THEME SONG: A long time ago, we used to be friends. 848 00:45:41,500 --> 00:45:46,967 But I haven't thought of you lately at all. 849 00:45:47,067 --> 00:45:50,833 If ever again, a greeting I send to you-- 850 00:45:50,933 --> 00:45:54,333 CARL: Being a human is rubbish, especially in this house. 851 00:45:54,433 --> 00:45:57,333 If it comes to a toss-up between people and dogs, 852 00:45:57,433 --> 00:45:59,033 give me a wet nose every time. 853 00:46:05,933 --> 00:46:06,933 You're not my dad. 854 00:46:07,033 --> 00:46:08,600 Of course I'm your fucking dad. 855 00:46:08,700 --> 00:46:13,833 Fiona had sexual intercourse with Joey Dawson. 856 00:46:13,933 --> 00:46:16,400 Gary Bennett. 857 00:46:16,500 --> 00:46:17,800 FRANK: Fucker. 858 00:46:17,900 --> 00:46:19,800 What do you think, eh? 859 00:46:19,900 --> 00:46:20,733 Mr. And Mrs. Dawson. 860 00:46:24,033 --> 00:46:26,900 [screaming] 861 00:46:27,000 --> 00:46:30,067 [music playing] 862 00:47:06,100 --> 00:47:08,567 GALLAGHERS: One, two, three, cheese! 863 00:47:08,667 --> 00:47:09,900 Er, two, three. 864 00:47:10,000 --> 00:47:11,233 VERONICA: Er, wrong family. 865 00:47:11,333 --> 00:47:12,733 GALLAGHERS: Go on, Sheila. 866 00:47:12,833 --> 00:47:14,467 (SINGING) So long, farewell. 867 00:47:14,567 --> 00:47:16,800 Auf wiedersehen, adieu. 868 00:47:16,900 --> 00:47:19,567 Adieu, adieu, to you and you and you. 869 00:47:27,567 --> 00:47:32,300 So long, farewell, au revoir, auf wiedersehen. 870 00:47:32,400 --> 00:47:35,267 I think I'd better lower the dose.