1
00:00:05,400 --> 00:00:07,367
FRANK (VOICEOVER): Now, nobody's
saying that Chatsworth Estate

2
00:00:07,467 --> 00:00:11,733
is the Garden of Eden, but it's
been a good home to us, to me,

3
00:00:11,833 --> 00:00:14,867
Frank Gallagher,
and me kids who I'm

4
00:00:14,967 --> 00:00:17,867
proud of 'cause every
single one of them

5
00:00:17,967 --> 00:00:20,000
reminds me a little of me.

6
00:00:20,100 --> 00:00:22,067
They can all think
for themselves,

7
00:00:22,167 --> 00:00:23,567
which they've me to thank for.

8
00:00:23,667 --> 00:00:24,467
CARL: Run!

9
00:00:24,567 --> 00:00:25,933
Run for it!

10
00:00:26,033 --> 00:00:28,500
FRANK: Fiona, who's
a massive help.

11
00:00:28,600 --> 00:00:31,467
Lip, who's a bit of a gobshite,
which is why nobody calls him

12
00:00:31,567 --> 00:00:32,867
Philip anymore.

13
00:00:32,967 --> 00:00:35,133
Ian, a lot like
his mam, which is

14
00:00:35,233 --> 00:00:36,533
handy for the
others 'cause she's

15
00:00:36,633 --> 00:00:37,900
disappeared into thin air.

16
00:00:38,000 --> 00:00:40,733
And Carl, we daren't let him
grow his hair for two reasons.

17
00:00:40,833 --> 00:00:43,667
One, it stands on end and
makes him look like Toyah.

18
00:00:43,767 --> 00:00:44,933
Two, nits love him.

19
00:00:45,033 --> 00:00:47,067
Debbie, sent by God.

20
00:00:47,167 --> 00:00:48,500
Total angel.

21
00:00:48,600 --> 00:00:50,667
You have to check your change,
but she'll go miles out

22
00:00:50,767 --> 00:00:51,967
of her way to do you a favor.

23
00:00:52,067 --> 00:00:55,233
Plus, Liam, gonna
be a star once we've

24
00:00:55,333 --> 00:00:57,867
got the fits under control.

25
00:00:57,967 --> 00:01:00,700
Steve, Fiona's boyfriend.

26
00:01:00,800 --> 00:01:02,733
The truth is out there.

27
00:01:02,833 --> 00:01:03,933
Not.

28
00:01:04,033 --> 00:01:06,667
Fantastic neighbors,
Kev and Veronica.

29
00:01:06,767 --> 00:01:07,567
Lend you anything.

30
00:01:07,667 --> 00:01:08,767
Well, not anything.

31
00:01:08,867 --> 00:01:12,700
But all of them to a man
know, first and foremost,

32
00:01:12,800 --> 00:01:15,900
one of the most vital
necessities in this life

33
00:01:16,000 --> 00:01:19,333
is they know how throw a party!

34
00:01:19,433 --> 00:01:20,233
[laughs]

35
00:01:20,333 --> 00:01:21,867
Scatter!

36
00:01:21,967 --> 00:01:25,833
MAN: What the fuck
are you doing?

37
00:01:25,933 --> 00:01:27,233
Hey, gives me bike back!

38
00:01:27,333 --> 00:01:30,767
BOY: Use it or lose it, fatso!

39
00:01:30,867 --> 00:01:33,333
[music playing]

40
00:01:42,167 --> 00:01:43,200
FRANK: For fuck's sake.

41
00:01:47,133 --> 00:01:48,367
DEBBIE: Ooh!

42
00:01:48,467 --> 00:01:50,133
I don't know why
everybody thinks

43
00:01:50,233 --> 00:01:53,267
Christmas is such a big deal.

44
00:01:53,367 --> 00:01:56,200
What is good about the
world standing still

45
00:01:56,300 --> 00:01:57,967
when the only shops
open don't actually

46
00:01:58,067 --> 00:01:59,467
sell anything worth having?

47
00:01:59,567 --> 00:02:02,433
FRANK: Didn't think
we had a white duvet.

48
00:02:02,533 --> 00:02:06,233
DEBBIE: If I hear anyone trying
to tell me the point of it all,

49
00:02:06,333 --> 00:02:08,100
I think I'll just
punch their lights out.

50
00:02:11,733 --> 00:02:12,600
MAN 1: Watch it.
[zap]

51
00:02:12,700 --> 00:02:13,767
[groans]
MAN 2: Hey!

52
00:02:13,867 --> 00:02:15,233
What have you gone and done now?

53
00:02:15,333 --> 00:02:16,900
WOMAN: What do you
mean, what have I done?

54
00:02:17,000 --> 00:02:20,300
MAN 2: What's the good of--

55
00:02:20,400 --> 00:02:23,300
[shouting]

56
00:02:26,200 --> 00:02:27,467
DEBBIE: Since our
family only ever

57
00:02:27,567 --> 00:02:30,767
got bigger, never
smaller right, Christmas

58
00:02:30,867 --> 00:02:32,533
seemed worse every year.

59
00:02:32,633 --> 00:02:34,733
Well, as far as I
could see anyway.

60
00:02:34,833 --> 00:02:38,433
And the more it cost, the
more everybody smiled.

61
00:02:38,533 --> 00:02:40,167
It never occurred
to them that two

62
00:02:40,267 --> 00:02:43,900
days later you could have bought
everything for half the price.

63
00:02:44,000 --> 00:02:47,633
I mean, it's fine right if you
can pretend the Earth has gone

64
00:02:47,733 --> 00:02:50,267
into hibernation and that
only good things happen

65
00:02:50,367 --> 00:02:51,800
once spring comes around.

66
00:02:51,900 --> 00:02:55,633
Not fine if you know for a
fact that every Christmas

67
00:02:55,733 --> 00:03:01,200
is as boring as the last one
'cause nothing ever happens.

68
00:03:01,300 --> 00:03:03,667
[indistinct chatter]

69
00:03:06,467 --> 00:03:10,433
STEVE: I think it's the
other away around, like this.

70
00:03:10,533 --> 00:03:12,500
You, stop fidgeting.

71
00:03:12,600 --> 00:03:15,533
IAN: What were you doing,
pushing and pulling?

72
00:03:15,633 --> 00:03:17,800
What is clever
about watching a tree

73
00:03:17,900 --> 00:03:20,133
dying in your living room?

74
00:03:22,800 --> 00:03:24,067
LIP: Oh, what's wrong with her?

75
00:03:24,167 --> 00:03:25,767
It's sad that she
hates Christmas.

76
00:03:25,867 --> 00:03:26,667
LIP: Come on.

77
00:03:26,767 --> 00:03:27,600
Hurry up.

78
00:03:27,700 --> 00:03:30,000
Let's get it in the house.

79
00:03:30,100 --> 00:03:31,567
Lip, Christmas shopping.

80
00:03:35,033 --> 00:03:36,333
Oi!

81
00:03:36,433 --> 00:03:38,233
SHEILA: So you didn't
see who mugged you?

82
00:03:38,333 --> 00:03:39,833
FRANK: No, just a bloke.

83
00:03:39,933 --> 00:03:42,400
A big bloke.

84
00:03:42,500 --> 00:03:43,400
[sighs]

85
00:03:43,500 --> 00:03:44,867
Christmas and they
take your wallet.

86
00:03:44,967 --> 00:03:47,967
So what was the Peterloo
Massacre all about?

87
00:03:48,067 --> 00:03:52,267
You haven't got
a wallet, Frank.

88
00:03:52,367 --> 00:03:54,200
No.

89
00:03:54,300 --> 00:03:57,967
I'd just bought one in the pub--

90
00:03:58,067 --> 00:04:01,267
a little crocodile skin--

91
00:04:01,367 --> 00:04:03,333
so I knew how much I
had 'cause I'd just

92
00:04:03,433 --> 00:04:05,500
transferred 55 quid into it.

93
00:04:05,600 --> 00:04:08,967
No, 'cause you went out
with less than a tenner.

94
00:04:09,067 --> 00:04:11,000
I said, "When you
get my prescriptions,

95
00:04:11,100 --> 00:04:12,467
can you pick us up
a box of formula

96
00:04:12,567 --> 00:04:16,667
to practice with in
case the baby rejects me

97
00:04:16,767 --> 00:04:19,800
and I can't breastfeed?"

98
00:04:19,900 --> 00:04:20,933
And you said,
"I've only a tenner

99
00:04:21,033 --> 00:04:22,967
so you'll have to sub us."

100
00:04:23,067 --> 00:04:24,100
- Did I?
- Yeah.

101
00:04:24,200 --> 00:04:25,300
So you probably
sent him on his way

102
00:04:25,400 --> 00:04:27,267
thinking it weren't
worth the effort.

103
00:04:27,367 --> 00:04:28,000
Have I?

104
00:04:28,100 --> 00:04:29,300
Yeah.

105
00:04:29,400 --> 00:04:32,133
So he won't be trying
that one twice, will he?

106
00:04:32,233 --> 00:04:33,633
No, I dare say not.

107
00:04:33,733 --> 00:04:38,367
SHEILA: Good, 'cause I've
got some news for you.

108
00:04:38,467 --> 00:04:41,167
Me mum's gone doolally
so our Karen's

109
00:04:41,267 --> 00:04:43,733
coming home for Christmas!

110
00:04:43,833 --> 00:04:45,300
[chuckles]

111
00:04:54,233 --> 00:04:55,433
Hoowah, right.

112
00:04:55,533 --> 00:04:57,067
Hey, this is gonna
fit Carl, isn't it?

113
00:04:57,167 --> 00:04:58,433
Yeah, no probs.

114
00:04:58,533 --> 00:05:00,800
And I'll tell you what,
Debbie's gonna love this.

115
00:05:00,900 --> 00:05:01,900
Oh!

116
00:05:02,000 --> 00:05:03,300
She once borrowed
one from school.

117
00:05:03,400 --> 00:05:05,633
Spent a week
magnifying head lice.

118
00:05:05,733 --> 00:05:06,633
Yeah?

119
00:05:06,733 --> 00:05:07,533
Ooh.

120
00:05:10,933 --> 00:05:11,833
Oi, oi, no.

121
00:05:11,933 --> 00:05:12,733
Oi!

122
00:05:12,833 --> 00:05:13,700
Not that one, all right?

123
00:05:13,800 --> 00:05:15,100
What is it?

124
00:05:15,200 --> 00:05:19,400
Well, you'll find out
when-- when Mr. Santa comes.

125
00:05:19,500 --> 00:05:21,767
When did you get it?
You were never out of my sight.

126
00:05:21,867 --> 00:05:23,467
Well, so she thought.

127
00:05:23,567 --> 00:05:24,667
What shop?

128
00:05:24,767 --> 00:05:25,633
I'm saying nothing.

129
00:05:25,733 --> 00:05:26,533
Come here.

130
00:05:26,633 --> 00:05:28,733
Oh, yeah?

131
00:05:28,833 --> 00:05:32,033
STEVE: Get that off.

132
00:05:32,133 --> 00:05:34,333
[kissing noises]

133
00:05:34,433 --> 00:05:37,400
FIONA: (QUIETLY) Come here.

134
00:05:37,500 --> 00:05:38,767
[laughs]

135
00:05:38,867 --> 00:05:40,100
No, cut it out.
Stop!

136
00:05:40,200 --> 00:05:41,300
STEVE: Whoa.

137
00:05:41,400 --> 00:05:43,067
Carl, fuck are you
doing down there?

138
00:05:43,167 --> 00:05:44,433
I wanted to know
what you got us.

139
00:05:44,533 --> 00:05:46,800
Why can't you both just
wait until Christmas day?

140
00:05:46,900 --> 00:05:48,033
I didn't want clothes.

141
00:05:48,133 --> 00:05:48,933
You haven't got clothes.

142
00:05:49,033 --> 00:05:49,867
I heard you.

143
00:05:49,967 --> 00:05:51,200
"Will these fit our Carl?"

144
00:05:51,300 --> 00:05:52,267
Yeah.

145
00:05:52,367 --> 00:05:53,967
A pair of earmuffs
and a big, fat nappy.

146
00:05:54,067 --> 00:05:55,800
Downstairs.

147
00:05:55,900 --> 00:05:59,167
CARL: Clothes aren't presents.

148
00:05:59,267 --> 00:06:01,667
MAN 1: This is his fault,
stopping at his girlfriend's

149
00:06:01,767 --> 00:06:02,567
in Rawtenstall.

150
00:06:02,667 --> 00:06:03,900
MAN 2: Will you shut up?

151
00:06:04,000 --> 00:06:05,433
MAN 1: What, he didn't warn you?

152
00:06:05,533 --> 00:06:08,467
Barry went to
Rawtenstall in 1987.

153
00:06:08,567 --> 00:06:10,100
Not been seen since.

154
00:06:10,200 --> 00:06:12,133
Bloody Bermuda Triangle.

155
00:06:12,233 --> 00:06:15,000
MAN 2: This fuel pipe's
completely shagged.

156
00:06:15,100 --> 00:06:18,200
I'll have to send for parts.

157
00:06:18,300 --> 00:06:19,767
LIP: (QUIETLY) You're
a bad man, Kev.

158
00:06:22,767 --> 00:06:23,600
KEV: Ho ho!

159
00:06:23,700 --> 00:06:25,733
LIP: Oh.

160
00:06:25,833 --> 00:06:27,133
KEV: What did I tell you?

161
00:06:27,233 --> 00:06:28,700
LIP: Quick, get that door.

162
00:06:28,800 --> 00:06:29,667
KEV: Come on.

163
00:06:29,767 --> 00:06:32,233
LIP: (QUIETLY) Here, grab these.

164
00:06:32,333 --> 00:06:32,967
[grunts]

165
00:06:33,067 --> 00:06:34,533
KEV: Here, here.

166
00:06:34,633 --> 00:06:36,133
[dog barking]

167
00:06:37,633 --> 00:06:40,000
LIP: OK, are you ready?

168
00:06:40,100 --> 00:06:41,100
KEV: Yep.

169
00:06:44,000 --> 00:06:44,900
Jez.

170
00:06:45,000 --> 00:06:46,367
Jez!

171
00:06:46,467 --> 00:06:48,100
Jez, come here.

172
00:06:48,200 --> 00:06:49,900
Come over here a minute.

173
00:06:50,000 --> 00:06:53,700
WOMAN: How come you always smell
of cheese and onion crisps?

174
00:06:53,800 --> 00:06:56,500
FRANK: 'Cause we always end
up sitting next to you, yeah?

175
00:06:56,600 --> 00:06:57,433
WOMAN: Ah.

176
00:07:02,800 --> 00:07:04,367
What's in it for me?

177
00:07:04,467 --> 00:07:07,233
Ten percent of what we
take and a couple of joints.

178
00:07:07,333 --> 00:07:08,967
Grass, skunk, or resin?

179
00:07:09,067 --> 00:07:11,600
No, lamb, pork, or beef.

180
00:07:11,700 --> 00:07:13,833
Hands up anybody
who's not collected

181
00:07:13,933 --> 00:07:15,967
their meat for Christmas yet.

182
00:07:16,067 --> 00:07:18,267
Oh, no, we've heard
it all before, girls,

183
00:07:18,367 --> 00:07:21,167
but maybe your Christmases
have all come early!

184
00:07:21,267 --> 00:07:23,467
Bring it in, fellas!

185
00:07:23,567 --> 00:07:24,833
[music playing]

186
00:07:24,933 --> 00:07:25,867
Half market price.

187
00:07:25,967 --> 00:07:27,167
Come on, girls.

188
00:07:27,267 --> 00:07:29,667
Get your meat and your
chops on these chops.

189
00:07:29,767 --> 00:07:30,900
Eh?

190
00:07:31,000 --> 00:07:32,167
Beef!

191
00:07:32,267 --> 00:07:33,667
Leg of lamb and
a shoulder of pork!

192
00:07:33,767 --> 00:07:35,767
KEV: Come on, girls.

193
00:07:35,867 --> 00:07:38,133
Two-- make that two of them.

194
00:07:38,233 --> 00:07:39,100
KEV: Yes, love?

195
00:07:39,200 --> 00:07:41,967
Little tough.

196
00:07:42,067 --> 00:07:42,967
Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa.

197
00:07:43,067 --> 00:07:44,467
I've got a piece of pork here.

198
00:07:44,567 --> 00:07:45,433
Who wants this?

199
00:07:45,533 --> 00:07:46,400
Don't be shy.

200
00:07:46,500 --> 00:07:47,367
Come and get it.

201
00:07:47,467 --> 00:07:49,300
[chatter]

202
00:07:52,200 --> 00:07:53,533
FRANK: For fuck's sake.

203
00:07:53,633 --> 00:07:55,067
A total shambles.

204
00:07:55,167 --> 00:07:56,167
Fucking animals.

205
00:07:59,400 --> 00:08:04,533
See, I don't like what we've
become, you know, as a nation.

206
00:08:04,633 --> 00:08:05,967
Massive pressure.

207
00:08:06,067 --> 00:08:08,100
Massive.

208
00:08:08,200 --> 00:08:10,567
People with nothing spend
money they can't afford.

209
00:08:10,667 --> 00:08:14,400
People with shitloads spend
money they don't notice.

210
00:08:14,500 --> 00:08:16,667
And for what?

211
00:08:16,767 --> 00:08:17,933
Little baby Jesus is it?

212
00:08:18,033 --> 00:08:19,433
Fuck.

213
00:08:19,533 --> 00:08:25,200
Sticking money in the pockets
of overpaid shites like--

214
00:08:25,300 --> 00:08:26,600
shops.

215
00:08:26,700 --> 00:08:30,433
Keeping you way down the pecking
order in a mountain of debt.

216
00:08:30,533 --> 00:08:34,500
Do you know what the perfect
Christmas is for me, Frank?

217
00:08:34,600 --> 00:08:39,400
Not having to listen to bone
idle, miserable, old wankers

218
00:08:39,500 --> 00:08:41,600
like you.

219
00:08:41,700 --> 00:08:44,867
That's why I bought this.

220
00:08:44,967 --> 00:08:47,267
Make way for a chronic duodenum.

221
00:08:50,467 --> 00:08:51,767
Shift, shift.

222
00:08:51,867 --> 00:08:55,800
With any luck you'll be dead
this time next year, smelly old

223
00:08:55,900 --> 00:08:56,733
cunt.

224
00:09:00,133 --> 00:09:01,233
LIP: [laughing]

225
00:09:01,333 --> 00:09:02,133
Yeah!

226
00:09:05,533 --> 00:09:06,567
Oh.

227
00:09:06,667 --> 00:09:08,100
Does that smell like an
old lady's tush to you?

228
00:09:08,200 --> 00:09:09,700
How the fuck should I know?

229
00:09:09,800 --> 00:09:10,633
[laughs]

230
00:09:10,733 --> 00:09:12,000
Eww, you knobhead!

231
00:09:15,833 --> 00:09:18,267
WOMEN: [chatter and laughter]

232
00:09:20,733 --> 00:09:21,900
Hey.

233
00:09:22,000 --> 00:09:23,700
Listen, are you sure
you don't mind, mate?

234
00:09:23,800 --> 00:09:25,233
Joking, are you?

235
00:09:25,333 --> 00:09:26,700
I'm in me element
wrapping presents.

236
00:09:26,800 --> 00:09:28,967
Little Carl's obsessed so
I can't leave them at ours.

237
00:09:29,067 --> 00:09:30,500
Oh, bless him.

238
00:09:30,600 --> 00:09:32,933
I tormented me mam
rooting for presents

239
00:09:33,033 --> 00:09:34,833
until I looked under the
bed and found a kitten.

240
00:09:34,933 --> 00:09:35,767
Aww.

241
00:09:35,867 --> 00:09:37,200
Yeah, not wrapped.

242
00:09:37,300 --> 00:09:38,233
No.

243
00:09:38,333 --> 00:09:42,700
Oi, Kev, show them
your drinks thingy.

244
00:09:42,800 --> 00:09:43,633
Well.

245
00:09:47,400 --> 00:09:49,200
It looks like an
ordinary beer barrel.

246
00:09:49,300 --> 00:09:50,367
OK.

247
00:09:50,467 --> 00:09:52,333
Wrong.

248
00:09:52,433 --> 00:09:54,333
[laughter]

249
00:09:55,367 --> 00:09:58,600
FIONA: Oh, it's
champion, is that.

250
00:09:58,700 --> 00:09:59,867
VERONICA: That's what I said.

251
00:09:59,967 --> 00:10:01,533
Champion.

252
00:10:01,633 --> 00:10:03,800
It's what you say to
kiddies when their drawing's

253
00:10:03,900 --> 00:10:05,967
absolutely fucking awful.

254
00:10:06,067 --> 00:10:07,567
So where'd you this, Kev?

255
00:10:07,667 --> 00:10:08,600
I made it.

256
00:10:08,700 --> 00:10:09,833
[laughter]

257
00:10:09,933 --> 00:10:10,767
I did.

258
00:10:13,733 --> 00:10:14,533
MARTY: Slag!

259
00:10:14,633 --> 00:10:15,533
Mum's a slag!

260
00:10:15,633 --> 00:10:16,933
Mm.

261
00:10:17,033 --> 00:10:19,067
[stammering]

262
00:10:20,567 --> 00:10:21,433
[barks]

263
00:10:22,533 --> 00:10:24,400
[laughter]

264
00:10:27,433 --> 00:10:29,733
FIONA: Marty?

265
00:10:29,833 --> 00:10:30,967
Oh, no, Marty.

266
00:10:31,067 --> 00:10:31,867
Not again.

267
00:10:31,967 --> 00:10:33,200
KEV: Oh, here we go.

268
00:10:33,300 --> 00:10:35,100
If there's a party,
there's a Marty.

269
00:10:35,200 --> 00:10:36,767
No, I'm on parole.
Legit.

270
00:10:36,867 --> 00:10:37,733
CAROL: Out of me way!

271
00:10:40,467 --> 00:10:41,633
Jesus, Mum.

272
00:10:41,733 --> 00:10:43,767
Look at the state of you.

273
00:10:43,867 --> 00:10:45,233
[sobbing]

274
00:10:47,600 --> 00:10:49,367
Are you OK, Carol?

275
00:10:49,467 --> 00:10:52,400
You will not believe this.

276
00:10:52,500 --> 00:10:53,333
Tell them.

277
00:10:53,433 --> 00:10:55,400
Never mind me.

278
00:10:55,500 --> 00:10:59,067
He's just burnt my house down.

279
00:10:59,167 --> 00:11:00,033
FIONA: Oh, my God.

280
00:11:00,133 --> 00:11:01,100
You're joking me, Carol?

281
00:11:01,200 --> 00:11:02,000
What about her?

282
00:11:02,100 --> 00:11:02,933
You're disgusting.

283
00:11:03,033 --> 00:11:05,567
Consenting sex is normal!

284
00:11:05,667 --> 00:11:06,833
Not at your age!

285
00:11:06,933 --> 00:11:09,933
There's nothing
wrong with my age!

286
00:11:10,033 --> 00:11:12,367
You!

287
00:11:12,467 --> 00:11:13,800
[grunting]

288
00:11:15,000 --> 00:11:16,333
VERONICA: Pack it in!
- Bastard!

289
00:11:16,433 --> 00:11:17,333
Slag!

290
00:11:17,433 --> 00:11:18,733
[shouting]

291
00:11:22,167 --> 00:11:24,633
You dirty bastard!

292
00:11:24,733 --> 00:11:26,600
[sobbing]

293
00:11:30,100 --> 00:11:31,233
Why have they let
you out if you're

294
00:11:31,333 --> 00:11:32,700
still pulling shit like this?

295
00:11:32,800 --> 00:11:34,933
Significant breakthroughs
with a cognitive therapist.

296
00:11:35,033 --> 00:11:36,033
[barks]

297
00:11:37,267 --> 00:11:39,900
But you can still torch
your own mam's house?

298
00:11:40,000 --> 00:11:40,967
I lets meself in, yeah.

299
00:11:41,067 --> 00:11:42,433
Surprise, surprise.

300
00:11:42,533 --> 00:11:43,800
Nobody in.

301
00:11:43,900 --> 00:11:47,500
Nips for a leak and she's having
a jump in the shower with--

302
00:11:47,600 --> 00:11:49,233
[stammering]

303
00:11:50,667 --> 00:11:51,933
[spits]

304
00:11:52,033 --> 00:11:52,967
Thingy.

305
00:11:53,067 --> 00:11:54,600
The redhead.

306
00:11:54,700 --> 00:11:57,200
Eddie Singer's middle lad.

307
00:11:57,300 --> 00:11:57,967
Sean?

308
00:11:58,067 --> 00:12:00,233
Sean.

309
00:12:00,333 --> 00:12:03,600
You were shagging Sean Singer?

310
00:12:03,700 --> 00:12:04,533
So?

311
00:12:04,633 --> 00:12:05,800
He's only twenty-odd.

312
00:12:05,900 --> 00:12:07,700
Yeah, he's a very
good-looking lad.

313
00:12:07,800 --> 00:12:09,667
You said I were
too old for him.

314
00:12:09,767 --> 00:12:13,733
So, I had the nous to
offer a cash incentive.

315
00:12:13,833 --> 00:12:14,733
You paid?

316
00:12:14,833 --> 00:12:16,200
For sex?

317
00:12:16,300 --> 00:12:18,233
It wasn't put like that.

318
00:12:18,333 --> 00:12:22,167
I offered an extra 50 quid
to smarten me bathroom tiles.

319
00:12:22,267 --> 00:12:23,967
A message sinks in.

320
00:12:24,067 --> 00:12:27,033
I'm having one of
my pleasanter days

321
00:12:27,133 --> 00:12:29,300
when fiery Jack
turns up screaming

322
00:12:29,400 --> 00:12:33,533
the odds and thick, black
smoke coming up the stairs.

323
00:12:33,633 --> 00:12:36,200
That's Marty's best mate.

324
00:12:36,300 --> 00:12:37,867
Oh, they're not twins.

325
00:12:37,967 --> 00:12:39,633
They're like twins.

326
00:12:39,733 --> 00:12:42,567
Yeah, but they're not twins.

327
00:12:42,667 --> 00:12:43,867
KEV: Sean Singer?

328
00:12:43,967 --> 00:12:44,967
Never mind that.

329
00:12:45,067 --> 00:12:46,300
What about my house?

330
00:12:49,133 --> 00:12:52,100
All your presents were in there.

331
00:12:52,200 --> 00:12:54,667
My entire Christmas.

332
00:12:54,767 --> 00:12:57,900
My whole bloody life.

333
00:12:58,000 --> 00:13:00,833
Thank you!

334
00:13:00,933 --> 00:13:02,400
[barking]

335
00:13:02,500 --> 00:13:03,800
[whimpering]

336
00:13:07,467 --> 00:13:08,300
There.

337
00:13:12,567 --> 00:13:16,000
So, we've nowhere else till
the council sorts us out,

338
00:13:16,100 --> 00:13:17,933
have we, Pepe?

339
00:13:18,033 --> 00:13:19,500
[sobbing]

340
00:13:22,033 --> 00:13:24,067
[barking]

341
00:13:24,667 --> 00:13:25,500
MARTY: Ah!

342
00:13:33,000 --> 00:13:33,900
BOY 1: [coughs]

343
00:13:34,000 --> 00:13:37,100
Where's all the snow gone?

344
00:13:37,200 --> 00:13:38,333
BOY 2: Me dad says
it's 'cause your mam

345
00:13:38,433 --> 00:13:40,000
never paid a council tax.

346
00:13:40,100 --> 00:13:41,100
BOY 1: Oh.

347
00:13:48,667 --> 00:13:50,967
We shift more meat than
this in a normal week,

348
00:13:51,067 --> 00:13:53,000
never mind Christmas.

349
00:13:53,100 --> 00:13:54,767
What if we've over-priced it?

350
00:13:54,867 --> 00:13:57,000
We always over-price it.

351
00:13:57,100 --> 00:13:57,933
True.

352
00:13:58,033 --> 00:13:59,800
What's up?

353
00:13:59,900 --> 00:14:02,200
Can you re-do
labels on these, Ian?

354
00:14:02,300 --> 00:14:03,667
Knock 50 pee off everything.

355
00:14:03,767 --> 00:14:06,700
We won't shift it.

356
00:14:06,800 --> 00:14:08,567
Well, there's tons of
knock-off flying about.

357
00:14:08,667 --> 00:14:10,200
Turkeys, beef, everything.

358
00:14:10,300 --> 00:14:11,933
Sheila brought us a couple
of legs of lamb 'round.

359
00:14:12,033 --> 00:14:13,533
She only paid about
a fiver for them.

360
00:14:13,633 --> 00:14:14,533
How fair is that, eh?

361
00:14:14,633 --> 00:14:15,467
From who?

362
00:14:15,567 --> 00:14:16,833
I don't know.

363
00:14:16,933 --> 00:14:20,033
But everyone's got, so I don't
think 50 pee is gonna help.

364
00:14:20,133 --> 00:14:21,200
That's all we need!

365
00:14:21,300 --> 00:14:22,767
Right, price them up at cost.

366
00:14:22,867 --> 00:14:23,733
Cost plus 50 pee.

367
00:14:23,833 --> 00:14:24,667
Cost.

368
00:14:24,767 --> 00:14:26,000
Plus 25.

369
00:14:26,100 --> 00:14:28,233
Yvonne, if we don't
shift this by its sell-by,

370
00:14:28,333 --> 00:14:30,367
it's gonna smell like a
bloody graveyard in here.

371
00:14:35,733 --> 00:14:37,367
Cost plus 25.

372
00:14:37,467 --> 00:14:38,800
I'll do a sign.

373
00:14:38,900 --> 00:14:40,800
[door bell rings]

374
00:14:52,333 --> 00:14:53,933
KEV: You tossed a house, Marty.

375
00:14:54,033 --> 00:14:56,267
The police will be after you.

376
00:14:56,367 --> 00:15:00,633
So, where did you
go from the nick?

377
00:15:00,733 --> 00:15:02,767
A bed and breakfast
someone told me about.

378
00:15:02,867 --> 00:15:04,167
Sheila Jackson's.

379
00:15:04,267 --> 00:15:05,400
KEV: Sheila and Frank's.

380
00:15:05,500 --> 00:15:06,833
And you never set
foot outside the house

381
00:15:06,933 --> 00:15:08,300
again that day, all right?

382
00:15:10,667 --> 00:15:11,967
Marty?

383
00:15:12,067 --> 00:15:13,033
Yes.

384
00:15:15,000 --> 00:15:16,633
Bucket of spunk!

385
00:15:16,733 --> 00:15:19,100
If anyone asks you lot,
he stayed in his room.

386
00:15:19,200 --> 00:15:21,467
What, Karen's room?

387
00:15:21,567 --> 00:15:24,133
Yeah, but call
it the spare room.

388
00:15:24,233 --> 00:15:26,133
Veronica, the cops
are around yours.

389
00:15:26,233 --> 00:15:27,600
Jesus.
Right.

390
00:15:27,700 --> 00:15:29,067
You'll have to get back to
yours so if anyone asks you

391
00:15:29,167 --> 00:15:30,267
can say Marty lodged with you.

392
00:15:30,367 --> 00:15:31,133
All right?

393
00:15:31,233 --> 00:15:32,600
Are you OK with that, Sheila?

394
00:15:32,700 --> 00:15:33,567
Yeah.

395
00:15:33,667 --> 00:15:34,300
I think.

396
00:15:34,400 --> 00:15:35,667
DEBBIE: They'll catch him.

397
00:15:35,767 --> 00:15:36,633
They always do.
- No!

398
00:15:36,733 --> 00:15:37,533
Oh.

399
00:15:37,633 --> 00:15:38,900
Hang on a minute.

400
00:15:39,000 --> 00:15:40,267
What would he have
done for supper

401
00:15:40,367 --> 00:15:42,167
if he came 'round at 3:00?

402
00:15:42,267 --> 00:15:43,100
VERONICA: He wasn't hungry.

403
00:15:43,200 --> 00:15:44,133
But he's a growing lad.

404
00:15:44,233 --> 00:15:45,100
I wouldn't have not fed him.

405
00:15:45,200 --> 00:15:46,333
Fine, just say you fed him!

406
00:15:46,433 --> 00:15:47,267
No.

407
00:15:47,367 --> 00:15:48,967
I don't want it
to look bad on me.

408
00:15:49,067 --> 00:15:50,067
Not if I'm charging rent.

409
00:15:50,167 --> 00:15:51,700
Whatever you like, Sheila.

410
00:15:51,800 --> 00:15:53,433
I'll say I gave him ham.

411
00:15:53,533 --> 00:15:57,033
That's very tasty for
the price, isn't it?

412
00:15:57,133 --> 00:15:58,967
It is.
Oh, thanks.

413
00:15:59,067 --> 00:16:00,033
Thanks, Sheila.

414
00:16:04,500 --> 00:16:06,233
[dog barking]

415
00:16:06,333 --> 00:16:08,600
POLICEMAN: Double up
and go around the back.

416
00:16:08,700 --> 00:16:12,167
They've sealed off
both ends of the street.

417
00:16:12,267 --> 00:16:14,667
Jesus, Mam,
they're everywhere!

418
00:16:14,767 --> 00:16:15,633
God in heaven.

419
00:16:15,733 --> 00:16:16,567
Go get Steve.

420
00:16:16,667 --> 00:16:17,800
Find out where Marty is.

421
00:16:17,900 --> 00:16:19,167
Get after Sheila.

422
00:16:19,267 --> 00:16:20,267
Make sure none of this is
freaking her out 'cause

423
00:16:20,367 --> 00:16:21,633
she don't look well to me.

424
00:16:21,733 --> 00:16:23,333
If she's the alibi, we'll
all be on prison food.

425
00:16:23,433 --> 00:16:26,167
She's bailing you out so just
give it a rest there, Carol.

426
00:16:26,267 --> 00:16:28,133
Hey, don't talk
to my mam like that!

427
00:16:28,233 --> 00:16:29,733
You can fuck off and all.

428
00:16:29,833 --> 00:16:30,633
This isn't our problem.

429
00:16:30,733 --> 00:16:32,067
No.

430
00:16:32,167 --> 00:16:33,733
And how many of your problems
have I helped out with?

431
00:16:33,833 --> 00:16:34,833
Veronica, I can defend myself.

432
00:16:34,933 --> 00:16:36,133
Yeah.

433
00:16:36,233 --> 00:16:38,433
What you can't seem to
do is control yourself.

434
00:16:38,533 --> 00:16:40,133
And you wonder where
Marty gets it from.

435
00:16:40,233 --> 00:16:43,267
Excuse me, I've never
burnt anything in my life!

436
00:16:43,367 --> 00:16:47,767
Well, you can't fucking
cook, that's for sure.

437
00:16:47,867 --> 00:16:48,700
Sorry, kid.

438
00:16:48,800 --> 00:16:49,600
Me and all.

439
00:16:55,833 --> 00:16:57,667
All right, we'll take
him 'round to my place till

440
00:16:57,767 --> 00:16:58,833
we figure out what's going on.

441
00:16:58,933 --> 00:17:00,300
You don't talk to
any of my tenants,

442
00:17:00,400 --> 00:17:02,533
you don't touch anything,
and you do not offer

443
00:17:02,633 --> 00:17:03,833
anyone a light, all right?

444
00:17:03,933 --> 00:17:04,767
Come on.

445
00:17:04,867 --> 00:17:06,233
[siren]

446
00:17:08,433 --> 00:17:09,800
MARTY: Are they all for me?

447
00:17:09,900 --> 00:17:11,333
Well, if they want a name,
I won't need asking twice.

448
00:17:11,433 --> 00:17:13,300
- I'm here!
- What is your fucking problem?

449
00:17:13,400 --> 00:17:14,633
I don't like the
way you've always

450
00:17:14,733 --> 00:17:16,033
got answers for everything.

451
00:17:16,133 --> 00:17:17,167
Why should that bother anyone?

452
00:17:17,267 --> 00:17:18,467
And anyway, I meant him.

453
00:17:18,567 --> 00:17:20,200
I've had another
cognitive therapist.

454
00:17:20,300 --> 00:17:23,200
Or assuming any suggestion Kev
makes a fucking waste of time.

455
00:17:23,300 --> 00:17:25,067
Yeah and that's not about
having two sides of a brain

456
00:17:25,167 --> 00:17:26,600
that communicate.

457
00:17:26,700 --> 00:17:28,967
So it's my fault I'm dyslexic?

458
00:17:29,067 --> 00:17:30,433
Dyslexic my arse, mate.

459
00:17:30,533 --> 00:17:32,033
You're illiterate.
It's all right.

460
00:17:32,133 --> 00:17:33,033
Admit it.
Get help.

461
00:17:33,133 --> 00:17:34,300
Come on let's go.

462
00:17:34,400 --> 00:17:35,367
You're asking from
a twatting now, Steve.

463
00:17:35,467 --> 00:17:37,233
Fuck off, Kev.

464
00:17:37,333 --> 00:17:38,633
Oi!

465
00:17:38,733 --> 00:17:41,233
[siren wailing]

466
00:17:42,067 --> 00:17:45,067
[police radio chatter]

467
00:17:46,567 --> 00:17:49,033
[crowd murmuring]

468
00:17:49,900 --> 00:17:52,467
This stinks.

469
00:17:52,567 --> 00:17:55,200
[police radio chatter]

470
00:17:55,300 --> 00:17:56,533
OFFICER: Found one!

471
00:17:56,633 --> 00:17:58,700
FIONA: They're not after, Marty.
- Don't run away.

472
00:17:58,800 --> 00:17:59,700
FIONA: It's the meat.

473
00:17:59,800 --> 00:18:01,567
They're after the meat!

474
00:18:01,667 --> 00:18:02,700
Oh, shit!

475
00:18:02,800 --> 00:18:04,033
OFFICER: What I am
supposed to do with this?

476
00:18:04,133 --> 00:18:05,267
OFFICER 2: I'm not
sticking for this.

477
00:18:07,833 --> 00:18:10,867
OFFICER: Lads, don't leave me.

478
00:18:10,967 --> 00:18:13,800
[suspenseful music playing]

479
00:18:20,733 --> 00:18:23,233
Oi.
FIONA: And that.

480
00:18:23,333 --> 00:18:24,600
Yeah, I've licked that bit.

481
00:18:24,700 --> 00:18:25,500
Tough.

482
00:18:27,433 --> 00:18:28,433
What are we gonna do with it?

483
00:18:28,533 --> 00:18:29,900
You're not
bringing it in 'ere.

484
00:18:30,000 --> 00:18:31,467
CAROL: Don't bin it.

485
00:18:31,567 --> 00:18:32,833
Why are you binning it?

486
00:18:32,933 --> 00:18:33,800
It's knock-off.

487
00:18:33,900 --> 00:18:35,167
The meat's knockoff.

488
00:18:35,267 --> 00:18:37,033
CAROL: Yeah, but nobody
pays full price for meat

489
00:18:37,133 --> 00:18:38,367
at this time of year.

490
00:18:38,467 --> 00:18:40,367
Yeah, and judging
from that turnout,

491
00:18:40,467 --> 00:18:42,400
it must have come
from an armed robbery.

492
00:18:42,500 --> 00:18:43,733
Or worse.

493
00:18:43,833 --> 00:18:45,000
VERONICA: Shit.

494
00:18:45,100 --> 00:18:47,267
What should we with it?

495
00:18:47,367 --> 00:18:50,033
FIONA: Well we chuck
it in the bins, can we?

496
00:18:50,133 --> 00:18:52,567
[music playing]

497
00:18:55,067 --> 00:18:56,933
[brakes squealing]

498
00:18:57,033 --> 00:18:58,900
Fuck!

499
00:18:59,000 --> 00:19:01,300
[helicopter blades turning]

500
00:19:01,400 --> 00:19:02,833
FIONA: Here, boy.
Here, boy.

501
00:19:02,933 --> 00:19:03,833
Come 'ere then.

502
00:19:03,933 --> 00:19:05,100
What's this, then?

503
00:19:05,200 --> 00:19:07,067
What's this tasty
bit of meat, then?

504
00:19:07,167 --> 00:19:09,033
Just a couple of chops to go.

505
00:19:09,133 --> 00:19:10,267
How you doing, V?

506
00:19:10,367 --> 00:19:11,733
VERONICA: Not bad.
Come on, then.

507
00:19:11,833 --> 00:19:13,233
Come on.
Come on boy.

508
00:19:15,667 --> 00:19:16,467
That's it.

509
00:19:16,567 --> 00:19:17,233
That's it.

510
00:19:17,333 --> 00:19:18,233
That's it boy, take it.

511
00:19:18,333 --> 00:19:19,300
Take it to your mom.

512
00:19:19,400 --> 00:19:21,200
Go on.

513
00:19:21,300 --> 00:19:24,333
[music continues]

514
00:19:30,800 --> 00:19:33,667
[car engine coming to a stop]

515
00:19:34,767 --> 00:19:38,000
[car doors opening]

516
00:19:38,100 --> 00:19:39,467
Steve.

517
00:19:39,567 --> 00:19:41,667
Where have you been?

518
00:19:41,767 --> 00:19:42,967
What?

519
00:19:43,067 --> 00:19:44,267
What's he doing here.

520
00:19:44,367 --> 00:19:45,233
There's cops everywhere.

521
00:19:45,333 --> 00:19:46,400
Yeah, well nevermind the cops.

522
00:19:46,500 --> 00:19:47,333
Look.

523
00:19:52,300 --> 00:19:53,367
FIONA: Bloody hell.

524
00:19:53,467 --> 00:19:54,267
VERONICA: What?

525
00:19:57,700 --> 00:19:59,400
KEV: Bloody hell, it's
like "Kelly's Heroes".

526
00:19:59,500 --> 00:20:00,400
Isn't it?

527
00:20:00,500 --> 00:20:01,833
ARMY OFFICER (ON
LOUDSPEAKER): Stay Stay

528
00:20:01,933 --> 00:20:05,700
in your homes with your
doors locked and your windows

529
00:20:05,800 --> 00:20:09,100
closed until further notice.

530
00:20:09,200 --> 00:20:11,800
Everything is under control.

531
00:20:11,900 --> 00:20:16,900
Please do as you're told and
no harm will come to you.

532
00:20:17,000 --> 00:20:19,267
This is not a drill.

533
00:20:19,367 --> 00:20:23,200
Repeat, this is not a drill.

534
00:20:23,300 --> 00:20:26,733
Stay in your homes
with your doors

535
00:20:26,833 --> 00:20:28,533
locked and your windows closed.

536
00:20:28,633 --> 00:20:30,100
Could make the
nationals with this.

537
00:20:30,200 --> 00:20:32,333
ARMY OFFICER: We need
that street cordoned off.

538
00:20:32,433 --> 00:20:34,933
Jump to it.

539
00:20:35,033 --> 00:20:39,467
ARMY OFFICER (ON LOUDSPEAKER):
Everything is under control.

540
00:20:39,567 --> 00:20:43,533
Please do as you're told and
no harm will come to you.

541
00:20:43,633 --> 00:20:45,667
It can't be another
bloody gas leak.

542
00:20:45,767 --> 00:20:46,800
YVONNE: No.

543
00:20:46,900 --> 00:20:48,167
I think they're filming.

544
00:20:48,267 --> 00:20:48,967
Oi!

545
00:20:49,067 --> 00:20:50,867
Is this for Corrie?

546
00:20:50,967 --> 00:20:52,333
No.

547
00:20:52,433 --> 00:20:55,033
Corrie only film 'round here
if it's a rape or a siege.

548
00:20:55,133 --> 00:20:56,567
NEWSCASTER (ON TV):
News News coming

549
00:20:56,667 --> 00:20:59,300
in here of an extraordinary
story breaking in Manchester.

550
00:20:59,400 --> 00:21:01,267
Chatsworth Estate
has been sealed

551
00:21:01,367 --> 00:21:04,100
off by the Ministry of Defense.

552
00:21:04,200 --> 00:21:07,100
We have a statement here
from a spokesman for the MoD.

553
00:21:07,200 --> 00:21:08,767
'everything possible is
being done to ensure--

554
00:21:08,867 --> 00:21:10,000
What's going on here, mate?

555
00:21:10,100 --> 00:21:11,567
JUSTIN (ON RADIO):
The the big news today

556
00:21:11,667 --> 00:21:13,533
out of the Chatsworth Estate in
Manchester, it has been sealed

557
00:21:13,633 --> 00:21:15,633
off by the Ministry of Defense.
Really.

558
00:21:15,733 --> 00:21:16,867
This is not a joke.

559
00:21:16,967 --> 00:21:17,800
It's not April the 1st.

560
00:21:17,900 --> 00:21:18,967
Check your calendars.

561
00:21:19,067 --> 00:21:20,200
I've got some
callers on the phone.

562
00:21:20,300 --> 00:21:21,500
Apparently I've got
Eileen on line one.

563
00:21:21,600 --> 00:21:23,067
Hello, Eileen.
EILEEN (ON PHONE): Hi, Justin.

564
00:21:23,167 --> 00:21:24,433
JUSTIN (ON RADIO): Hi.
You been down to Chatsworth.

565
00:21:24,533 --> 00:21:25,833
You've been trying to get
in, haven't you, today?

566
00:21:25,933 --> 00:21:27,133
EILEEN (ON PHONE): Well, yeah.

567
00:21:27,233 --> 00:21:28,433
I said to the soldier
on the gate, "Excuse me,

568
00:21:28,533 --> 00:21:31,333
me dad's lived on that
estate for 45 years now.

569
00:21:31,433 --> 00:21:32,967
Never missed a
Christmas meal with him.

570
00:21:33,067 --> 00:21:34,267
JUSTIN (ON RADIO): And
were they helpful to you,

571
00:21:34,367 --> 00:21:35,100
Eileen, the soldiers?
EILEEN (ON PHONE): No.

572
00:21:35,200 --> 00:21:36,167
He said, "Fuck off."

573
00:21:36,267 --> 00:21:37,767
Can I say, fuck off?
- No.

574
00:21:37,867 --> 00:21:38,700
You can't, Eileen.

575
00:21:38,800 --> 00:21:39,833
Hi, boys.

576
00:21:39,933 --> 00:21:41,900
Stan Waterman,
community liaison.

577
00:21:42,000 --> 00:21:44,300
Nobody in or out, my orders.

578
00:21:44,400 --> 00:21:45,867
Chatsworth Estate's my patch.

579
00:21:45,967 --> 00:21:47,433
Eh, who's arguing?

580
00:21:47,533 --> 00:21:49,633
But like Afghanistan,
Iraq, Northern Ireland

581
00:21:49,733 --> 00:21:51,700
and Timbuk-fucking-tu,
you can your patch

582
00:21:51,800 --> 00:21:53,667
back once we've milked it dry.

583
00:21:53,767 --> 00:21:55,533
All right?

584
00:21:55,633 --> 00:21:56,767
Me mum's in there.

585
00:21:56,867 --> 00:21:58,600
TONY: Leave it, Stan.

586
00:21:58,700 --> 00:21:59,567
Come on.

587
00:21:59,667 --> 00:22:00,533
Get back in the car.

588
00:22:05,500 --> 00:22:07,000
Go

589
00:22:07,100 --> 00:22:09,600
That's it, go on.

590
00:22:09,700 --> 00:22:11,000
Keep going.

591
00:22:11,100 --> 00:22:12,933
Go on.

592
00:22:13,033 --> 00:22:13,867
That's it.

593
00:22:13,967 --> 00:22:17,000
Piss off your street.

594
00:22:17,100 --> 00:22:18,733
What a mug.

595
00:22:18,833 --> 00:22:20,733
[car engine revving]

596
00:22:20,833 --> 00:22:21,700
Get out of the way!

597
00:22:21,800 --> 00:22:23,700
Out the way!

598
00:22:23,800 --> 00:22:26,700
[tires squealing]

599
00:22:30,233 --> 00:22:32,533
TONY: We're responsible for
social order 'round here.

600
00:22:32,633 --> 00:22:34,200
So I want to know
why I wasn't informed

601
00:22:34,300 --> 00:22:35,700
of your silly bugger maneuvers?

602
00:22:35,800 --> 00:22:38,000
COMMANDER: Your chief
constable forgot you existed,

603
00:22:38,100 --> 00:22:39,667
so you weren't
cleared for security.

604
00:22:39,767 --> 00:22:40,833
Oh can we go?

605
00:22:40,933 --> 00:22:42,433
Not until I know
what's going on.

606
00:22:42,533 --> 00:22:44,267
OK.

607
00:22:44,367 --> 00:22:45,167
Sign this.

608
00:22:48,800 --> 00:22:51,367
Last night, thieves stole
200-weight of freight.

609
00:22:51,467 --> 00:22:52,400
Yeah.

610
00:22:52,500 --> 00:22:53,433
All this for a bit
of bloody knock-off?

611
00:22:53,533 --> 00:22:55,467
Oh, no.
That happens every week.

612
00:22:55,567 --> 00:22:56,933
We tried nipping it
in the buds, but they

613
00:22:57,033 --> 00:22:58,000
keep the prices very low.

614
00:22:58,100 --> 00:22:59,200
Especially electricals.

615
00:22:59,300 --> 00:23:00,800
The freight was all meat.

616
00:23:00,900 --> 00:23:02,100
Yeah, it's Christmas.

617
00:23:02,200 --> 00:23:03,367
Easter it'll be chocolate.

618
00:23:03,467 --> 00:23:06,167
August it'll be
sunbeds and sarongs.

619
00:23:06,267 --> 00:23:07,267
COMMANDER: The
meat was on its way

620
00:23:07,367 --> 00:23:10,233
into an army base in Scotland.

621
00:23:10,333 --> 00:23:13,000
To a defense laboratory.

622
00:23:13,100 --> 00:23:15,533
One that specializes
in biological warfare.

623
00:23:18,400 --> 00:23:20,767
Which-- which kind of means
we talking abouts exactly?

624
00:23:20,867 --> 00:23:22,133
COMMANDER: All manners of meat.

625
00:23:22,233 --> 00:23:24,367
Hinds and rinds, legs and
segs, heads and innards.

626
00:23:24,467 --> 00:23:30,000
With-- "not for human
consumption" labels, like this.

627
00:23:30,100 --> 00:23:31,667
That's why we've
quarantined this area.

628
00:23:31,767 --> 00:23:35,433
Oh, fuck's sake!

629
00:23:35,533 --> 00:23:38,400
[cell phone dialing]

630
00:23:40,467 --> 00:23:41,467
STAN: Mom.

631
00:23:41,567 --> 00:23:42,733
Don't cook that lamb.

632
00:23:42,833 --> 00:23:45,700
Do not cook that lamb, because--

633
00:23:45,800 --> 00:23:47,467
Hello?

634
00:23:47,567 --> 00:23:50,133
Well-- where's me mum?

635
00:23:50,233 --> 00:23:52,867
SOLDER (ON RADIO): Casualties
arriving with unit 6-1-5.

636
00:23:52,967 --> 00:23:57,700
One male, aged 25, female, 64.

637
00:23:57,800 --> 00:23:59,533
Married apparently.

638
00:23:59,633 --> 00:24:02,333
Large number of suspected
cases in the same house.

639
00:24:02,433 --> 00:24:03,500
Big family.

640
00:24:03,600 --> 00:24:06,833
Massive actually, 14
kids and counting, Sarge.

641
00:24:06,933 --> 00:24:08,100
All cross-eyed.

642
00:24:08,200 --> 00:24:09,233
Unless that's one
of the symptoms.

643
00:24:09,333 --> 00:24:10,600
Le me check on that.

644
00:24:10,700 --> 00:24:12,267
Touch it and your dead!

645
00:24:12,367 --> 00:24:14,400
This meat is the
property of the Ministry--

646
00:24:14,500 --> 00:24:15,400
The meat is mine.

647
00:24:15,500 --> 00:24:16,300
Von!

648
00:24:16,400 --> 00:24:17,067
No!

649
00:24:17,167 --> 00:24:18,633
Let 'em have it!

650
00:24:18,733 --> 00:24:19,567
The meat.

651
00:24:19,667 --> 00:24:20,833
Let them have the meat!

652
00:24:20,933 --> 00:24:21,767
Fuck off!

653
00:24:21,867 --> 00:24:23,300
We've lost enough on this.

654
00:24:23,400 --> 00:24:27,433
I am sick of having to compete
with knock-off 'round here!

655
00:24:27,533 --> 00:24:28,867
Come on love,
you're being daft.

656
00:24:28,967 --> 00:24:30,667
Hey, bud, I've run
down bigger than that.

657
00:24:30,767 --> 00:24:32,300
Don't corner her, you'll
only make her worse!

658
00:24:32,400 --> 00:24:35,233
All right.
Come-- come on, Von.

659
00:24:35,333 --> 00:24:38,200
You mean more to me
than a bloody shop.

660
00:24:38,300 --> 00:24:39,733
SOLDIER: Come on.

661
00:24:39,833 --> 00:24:40,733
Silly girl.

662
00:24:46,600 --> 00:24:48,900
All right then,
let's get it cleared.

663
00:24:49,000 --> 00:24:52,333
[shop door opens]

664
00:24:52,433 --> 00:24:53,533
[door closes]

665
00:24:53,633 --> 00:24:56,767
SOLDIER: Give us a
little bag, will you?

666
00:24:56,867 --> 00:24:57,700
Yes Lillian.

667
00:24:57,800 --> 00:24:58,600
Packet of fags, Yvonne.

668
00:25:01,733 --> 00:25:04,800
Couple a scratchcards,
were only your lucky ones.

669
00:25:08,333 --> 00:25:10,233
You wouldn't have
any broken biscuits?

670
00:25:15,400 --> 00:25:17,233
Fetch them back, you
can have 20 pence off.

671
00:25:22,400 --> 00:25:25,900
Did you mean what
you said, Kash?

672
00:25:26,000 --> 00:25:29,600
Not physically,
obviously, 'cause--

673
00:25:29,700 --> 00:25:31,333
well, yeah.

674
00:25:31,433 --> 00:25:32,867
You mean the world to me.

675
00:25:32,967 --> 00:25:35,600
Of course you do.

676
00:25:35,700 --> 00:25:39,033
I've just come to say,
that I feel a bit rough.

677
00:25:39,133 --> 00:25:40,733
Yeah, you look it.

678
00:25:40,833 --> 00:25:41,867
Thanks.

679
00:25:41,967 --> 00:25:43,700
So I'm going to
give this afternoon

680
00:25:43,800 --> 00:25:44,967
a miss if that's right, Yvonne?

681
00:25:45,067 --> 00:25:47,333
Yeah, of course it is, love.

682
00:25:47,433 --> 00:25:48,267
See ya.

683
00:25:52,600 --> 00:25:54,300
They're bit more hammered
than what I wanted.

684
00:26:03,167 --> 00:26:04,533
On me Lillian.

685
00:26:04,633 --> 00:26:07,800
Season's greetings.

686
00:26:07,900 --> 00:26:11,800
[door opens and bell rings]

687
00:26:11,900 --> 00:26:12,700
Did you buy any meat?

688
00:26:12,800 --> 00:26:14,233
What if we did?

689
00:26:14,333 --> 00:26:15,500
DEBBIE: It says nothing if I
didn't know where it came from.

690
00:26:15,600 --> 00:26:17,333
TONY: Have you
actually eaten any?

691
00:26:17,433 --> 00:26:18,667
FIONA: I gave most
of mine to dogs.

692
00:26:22,100 --> 00:26:24,333
TONY: They've just carted
a load of dogs away.

693
00:26:24,433 --> 00:26:26,433
A couple of them were half
cripple to start with.

694
00:26:26,533 --> 00:26:27,767
Poor sods.

695
00:26:27,867 --> 00:26:28,767
All dead.

696
00:26:28,867 --> 00:26:31,600
The lot of 'em.
- From what?

697
00:26:35,567 --> 00:26:39,233
Listen, I am in deep shit if
they know I'm repeating this.

698
00:26:39,333 --> 00:26:40,500
They made me sign
Official Secrets,

699
00:26:40,600 --> 00:26:45,067
but the meat was on its
way from Porton Down.

700
00:26:45,167 --> 00:26:46,900
VERONICA: Porton Down?

701
00:26:47,000 --> 00:26:48,567
I thought that were
a made-up place.

702
00:26:48,667 --> 00:26:50,133
You know, with rabbits?

703
00:26:50,233 --> 00:26:52,133
Oh no, that's Watership Down.

704
00:26:52,233 --> 00:26:54,600
TONY: No, Porton Down is
a defense installation.

705
00:26:54,700 --> 00:26:56,600
The meat was part of
a war games exercise.

706
00:26:56,700 --> 00:26:59,567
It's contaminated with
something from team A, then sent

707
00:26:59,667 --> 00:27:01,867
for analysis to team
B who are given 24

708
00:27:01,967 --> 00:27:03,300
hours to work out what's in it.

709
00:27:03,400 --> 00:27:05,567
Except they can't
because it never arrived.

710
00:27:05,667 --> 00:27:07,967
STEVE: Yeah, contaminated
with something like what?

711
00:27:08,067 --> 00:27:09,433
Well that's the
whole point, nobody

712
00:27:09,533 --> 00:27:12,200
knows until they get team A
back from Christmas leave.

713
00:27:12,300 --> 00:27:15,567
How long's that going to take?

714
00:27:15,667 --> 00:27:18,033
TONY: I need to know if
any of you have eaten it?

715
00:27:24,200 --> 00:27:25,633
Eh, you have.

716
00:27:25,733 --> 00:27:27,400
- I had no appetite.
- No.

717
00:27:27,500 --> 00:27:28,633
You said you
couldn't stomach it,

718
00:27:28,733 --> 00:27:29,667
but you wolfed the lot down.

719
00:27:29,767 --> 00:27:31,400
I never.

720
00:27:31,500 --> 00:27:32,600
Carol, I watched.

721
00:27:32,700 --> 00:27:33,667
You were still licking the
fucking plate while you

722
00:27:33,767 --> 00:27:34,600
were doing the washing up.

723
00:27:36,933 --> 00:27:38,100
TONY: Right.

724
00:27:38,200 --> 00:27:40,400
Well, so far we've had
two human fatalities

725
00:27:40,500 --> 00:27:43,333
and 12 people have
gone down poorly.

726
00:27:43,433 --> 00:27:45,267
Now nobody's sure what
symptoms to look out

727
00:27:45,367 --> 00:27:47,900
for, apart from nosebleeds
and stomach pains.

728
00:27:48,000 --> 00:27:49,333
Colicy stomach pains.

729
00:27:49,433 --> 00:27:52,300
They've set up a field
hospital at the junior school.

730
00:27:52,400 --> 00:27:54,033
Everybody inside
the quarantined area

731
00:27:54,133 --> 00:27:55,467
is going to have to
give a blood sample.

732
00:27:55,567 --> 00:27:56,233
Right.

733
00:27:56,333 --> 00:27:59,000
You all need testing now.

734
00:27:59,100 --> 00:28:00,367
Question.

735
00:28:00,467 --> 00:28:03,833
[snorts] Is anyone out
there mentioning my name?

736
00:28:03,933 --> 00:28:04,933
TONY: What's your name?

737
00:28:05,033 --> 00:28:06,833
Marty Fisher.

738
00:28:06,933 --> 00:28:07,967
No.

739
00:28:08,067 --> 00:28:08,933
[marty snorts]

740
00:28:09,033 --> 00:28:10,300
Ian.

741
00:28:10,400 --> 00:28:12,233
He's still at work.
You'll have to tell him.

742
00:28:12,333 --> 00:28:13,200
-

743
00:28:13,300 --> 00:28:14,200
COMMANDER: He's
put himself to bed.

744
00:28:14,300 --> 00:28:14,733
Said he was feeling a bit rough.

745
00:28:20,133 --> 00:28:22,400
[rock music playing]

746
00:28:22,500 --> 00:28:23,933
JEZ: Do you know
what's going on, Kev?

747
00:28:24,033 --> 00:28:25,133
Fucking right I do.

748
00:28:25,233 --> 00:28:26,133
They're after the meat.

749
00:28:26,233 --> 00:28:28,467
Where's the meat?

750
00:28:28,567 --> 00:28:29,733
No one should eat it.

751
00:28:29,833 --> 00:28:33,767
It's not for human consumption.

752
00:28:33,867 --> 00:28:35,800
Where's all the meat, Jez?

753
00:28:35,900 --> 00:28:37,900
They've cleaned me out.

754
00:28:38,000 --> 00:28:41,000
[music continues]

755
00:28:43,633 --> 00:28:44,967
Good man, that's it.
Get it up, Felix.

756
00:28:45,067 --> 00:28:46,667
Save some room for your pudding.

757
00:28:46,767 --> 00:28:47,767
Yeah.
All right.

758
00:28:47,867 --> 00:28:49,200
Thank you.
Yeah, you've had enough.

759
00:28:49,300 --> 00:28:50,200
Yeah.

760
00:28:50,300 --> 00:28:51,233
We've got darts coming
up now, so we've

761
00:28:51,333 --> 00:28:52,267
got to clear the space.
Yeah.

762
00:28:52,367 --> 00:28:53,333
Good.

763
00:28:53,433 --> 00:28:54,633
MAN: Hey, hold on
that's my bloody dinner.

764
00:28:54,733 --> 00:28:55,900
KEV: Yeah.

765
00:28:56,000 --> 00:28:56,933
How's your Kevin, is
he all set over here?

766
00:28:57,033 --> 00:28:57,933
Yeah.
WOMAN: What's your game?

767
00:28:58,033 --> 00:28:59,033
KEV: OK.
You on a diet, you?

768
00:28:59,133 --> 00:28:59,900
WOMAN: That's our
dinner, that is.

769
00:29:00,000 --> 00:29:00,867
We paid for that.

770
00:29:00,967 --> 00:29:01,800
KEV: That's it, good.

771
00:29:04,500 --> 00:29:06,733
I need see your
kitchens ma'am.

772
00:29:06,833 --> 00:29:08,467
Not without a
warrant you don't.

773
00:29:08,567 --> 00:29:09,533
That's it for you, mate.

774
00:29:09,633 --> 00:29:10,733
Only speak if you
don't need your face.

775
00:29:18,167 --> 00:29:20,800
All right, Felix?

776
00:29:20,900 --> 00:29:24,200
You all right, me old mate?

777
00:29:24,300 --> 00:29:27,267
[rock music playing]

778
00:29:29,167 --> 00:29:32,167
[quiet music playing]

779
00:29:38,600 --> 00:29:39,233
Look.

780
00:29:39,333 --> 00:29:40,567
Come on, look at him.

781
00:29:40,667 --> 00:29:41,700
He has to be in a hospital.

782
00:29:41,800 --> 00:29:42,933
A proper hospital.

783
00:29:43,033 --> 00:29:44,100
That's not possible.

784
00:29:44,200 --> 00:29:45,100
We can't break the quarantine.

785
00:29:45,200 --> 00:29:46,300
But he's burning up.

786
00:29:46,400 --> 00:29:47,633
DOCTOR: I'll get his
temperature down.

787
00:29:47,733 --> 00:29:49,800
We'll keep him supervised
on a regular basis.

788
00:29:49,900 --> 00:29:51,033
You're up with saline.

789
00:29:51,133 --> 00:29:52,433
What the bloody good
is that going to do?

790
00:29:52,533 --> 00:29:54,000
It's the only thing
we'd use until we

791
00:29:54,100 --> 00:29:55,533
can identify the contamination.

792
00:29:55,633 --> 00:29:56,533
You lot put it there.

793
00:29:56,633 --> 00:29:57,800
You should fucking
know what's in it.

794
00:29:57,900 --> 00:29:59,400
DOCTOR: Where have
you heard that?

795
00:30:03,000 --> 00:30:05,733
FIONA: It's just a
rumor someone started.

796
00:30:05,833 --> 00:30:08,133
DOCTOR: All right, Ian, I'm
going to need your other arm.

797
00:30:08,233 --> 00:30:09,967
I need to take a blood sample.

798
00:30:10,067 --> 00:30:11,533
OK?

799
00:30:11,633 --> 00:30:13,300
Only a small sting.

800
00:30:13,400 --> 00:30:15,033
I'll be as gentle as I can.

801
00:30:19,700 --> 00:30:22,400
SOLDIER: Listen, just form
an orderly queue, all right?

802
00:30:22,500 --> 00:30:24,033
Keep in line.

803
00:30:24,133 --> 00:30:25,900
COMMANDER: Jesus, Peebles.

804
00:30:26,000 --> 00:30:27,700
It's like a worn-out gene pool.

805
00:30:31,400 --> 00:30:33,667
None of the women comb
their hair at the back.

806
00:30:33,767 --> 00:30:35,300
Is that a religious thing?

807
00:30:35,400 --> 00:30:36,833
SOLDIER: I'm not sure, sir.

808
00:30:36,933 --> 00:30:38,900
I'll make it my business
to find out, sir.

809
00:30:39,000 --> 00:30:45,267
Oh-- little men dressed
in brief authority.

810
00:30:45,367 --> 00:30:46,500
Eh?

811
00:30:46,600 --> 00:30:47,600
19th century.

812
00:30:47,700 --> 00:30:48,867
Shakespeare.

813
00:30:48,967 --> 00:30:50,933
Plus other stuff, so
don't think you're hard.

814
00:30:51,033 --> 00:30:52,867
Never poke your
cousin if you can't find

815
00:30:52,967 --> 00:30:55,100
a cardigan with three sleeves.

816
00:30:55,200 --> 00:30:56,700
Socrates, 400BC.

817
00:30:59,767 --> 00:31:02,533
You didn't know that.

818
00:31:02,633 --> 00:31:05,067
Or you.

819
00:31:05,167 --> 00:31:06,533
Somebody must have
poked a bloody goat

820
00:31:06,633 --> 00:31:07,767
to come up with that one.

821
00:31:07,867 --> 00:31:08,667
Sir.

822
00:31:14,233 --> 00:31:16,500
FRANK: Vernon Francis Gallagher.

823
00:31:16,600 --> 00:31:19,400
Vernons as in Pools, though
I've never won a fucking bean.

824
00:31:19,500 --> 00:31:21,467
I used to be a blood donor
until they stopped because I

825
00:31:21,567 --> 00:31:23,400
got slightly addicted.

826
00:31:23,500 --> 00:31:26,367
Out with the old,
in with the new.

827
00:31:26,467 --> 00:31:28,833
It's quite seductive in a way.

828
00:31:28,933 --> 00:31:30,900
Don't you think?

829
00:31:31,000 --> 00:31:34,833
So are you taking any regular
medication at all, Sheila?

830
00:31:34,933 --> 00:31:36,267
Well as a matter
of fact, I am.

831
00:31:36,367 --> 00:31:37,000
Hey.

832
00:31:37,100 --> 00:31:39,367
No way BCG in third year.

833
00:31:39,467 --> 00:31:41,533
I'm still having nightmares.

834
00:31:41,633 --> 00:31:42,433
Passed out.

835
00:31:42,533 --> 00:31:43,800
Woke up color-blind.

836
00:31:43,900 --> 00:31:46,667
Can't tell the difference
between dexidrine and nurofen.

837
00:31:46,767 --> 00:31:50,033
Which-- no, around here
bastards take advantage.

838
00:31:50,133 --> 00:31:51,233
Would you just let me--

839
00:31:51,333 --> 00:31:54,500
You are not coming
near me with that.

840
00:31:54,600 --> 00:31:57,300
Ow!

841
00:31:57,400 --> 00:31:59,400
Fat cunt.

842
00:31:59,500 --> 00:32:03,333
On the plus side, I've got
20/20 vision, you know, so--

843
00:32:03,433 --> 00:32:04,600
all my--

844
00:32:04,700 --> 00:32:07,000
[mumbling]

845
00:32:07,100 --> 00:32:08,567
STEVE: Listen, if
you know it's not

846
00:32:08,667 --> 00:32:10,167
airborne, where's the problem
in letting us off the Estate.

847
00:32:10,267 --> 00:32:11,967
DOCTOR: Because until we
know that level of contagion,

848
00:32:12,067 --> 00:32:13,700
Christmas isn't a good
time to send people

849
00:32:13,800 --> 00:32:15,567
off kissing their relatives.

850
00:32:15,667 --> 00:32:16,400
STEVE: Fair point.

851
00:32:16,500 --> 00:32:17,933
What's Ian's blood tests saying?

852
00:32:18,033 --> 00:32:20,300
DOCTOR: Well
nothing helpful yet,

853
00:32:20,400 --> 00:32:22,233
but please, just
believe me, none of us

854
00:32:22,333 --> 00:32:23,933
want to be here either.

855
00:32:24,033 --> 00:32:26,000
The only mortalities
so far have occurred

856
00:32:26,100 --> 00:32:27,833
in people with a
history of diabetes

857
00:32:27,933 --> 00:32:29,267
or chronically high
blood pressure.

858
00:32:29,367 --> 00:32:32,000
Now Ian's 15, no
medical complications.

859
00:32:32,100 --> 00:32:33,633
That's all I can say for sure.

860
00:32:33,733 --> 00:32:34,600
OK?

861
00:32:34,700 --> 00:32:35,500
We won't say you said.

862
00:32:35,600 --> 00:32:37,933
CAROL: Ah!

863
00:32:38,033 --> 00:32:39,300
VERONICA: Mom!
Mom!

864
00:32:39,400 --> 00:32:40,500
MARTY: What's wrong with her?

865
00:32:40,600 --> 00:32:42,300
STAN: Well it's not
fucking flu is it?

866
00:32:42,400 --> 00:32:44,533
CAROL: Pepe!

867
00:32:44,633 --> 00:32:48,667
If you let this
happen, we're finished.

868
00:32:48,767 --> 00:32:51,467
[crying]

869
00:32:53,267 --> 00:32:57,367
Swear to me you
won't cut him open!

870
00:32:57,467 --> 00:33:00,333
[wailing]

871
00:33:00,433 --> 00:33:01,767
Pepe.

872
00:33:01,867 --> 00:33:04,733
Pepe!

873
00:33:04,833 --> 00:33:07,700
[ventilator starts]

874
00:33:07,800 --> 00:33:10,667
[tense music playing]

875
00:33:23,100 --> 00:33:24,800
You!
You fucking--

876
00:33:24,900 --> 00:33:25,733
Hey, hey, hey, no.

877
00:33:25,833 --> 00:33:26,633
Hang on a minute, Stan.

878
00:33:26,733 --> 00:33:27,867
He caused all this.

879
00:33:27,967 --> 00:33:29,033
Him!

880
00:33:29,133 --> 00:33:29,800
That's where they
got the meat from.

881
00:33:29,900 --> 00:33:31,033
FIONA: Oh, Kev.

882
00:33:31,133 --> 00:33:33,233
STAN: A fiver for
the shoulder of lamb.

883
00:33:33,333 --> 00:33:34,633
And worth it, was it, Kev, eh?

884
00:33:34,733 --> 00:33:35,533
Nice little wedge?

885
00:33:39,600 --> 00:33:42,467
[clears throat]

886
00:33:47,933 --> 00:33:48,800
Help us out, Lip.

887
00:33:55,433 --> 00:33:56,333
Little shit.

888
00:34:00,467 --> 00:34:01,267
STAN: Come here!

889
00:34:03,833 --> 00:34:04,667
Bring him in.

890
00:34:04,767 --> 00:34:05,567
Sir.

891
00:34:08,733 --> 00:34:12,300
Merry Fucking Christmas.

892
00:34:12,400 --> 00:34:14,767
[crying]

893
00:34:15,800 --> 00:34:16,667
[toy squeaks]

894
00:34:16,767 --> 00:34:19,067
[crying]

895
00:34:19,167 --> 00:34:21,867
MARTY: Sorry mum.

896
00:34:21,967 --> 00:34:23,667
Yes I know.

897
00:34:23,767 --> 00:34:25,233
'Cause you caused this.

898
00:34:28,333 --> 00:34:31,467
[barks]

899
00:34:31,567 --> 00:34:34,467
I've been sent
down three times.

900
00:34:34,567 --> 00:34:36,400
When did you cry for me?

901
00:34:36,500 --> 00:34:37,800
Call

902
00:34:37,900 --> 00:34:41,500
Apart from worms and diarrhea,
when did Pepe ever let me down?

903
00:34:41,600 --> 00:34:43,800
He's got a brain
about this big.

904
00:34:43,900 --> 00:34:46,033
What difference does that
make when brain you've got

905
00:34:46,133 --> 00:34:47,500
is wired like an old Allegro?

906
00:34:53,600 --> 00:34:56,133
COMMANDER: I'm not Interested
in how little you made on it.

907
00:34:56,233 --> 00:34:58,400
We need to know, as a matter
of urgency, whether any of it

908
00:34:58,500 --> 00:35:00,533
was sold outside the community.

909
00:35:03,233 --> 00:35:07,200
Well not sold, but I took
a rack of lamb 'round me

910
00:35:07,300 --> 00:35:08,600
Aunty Pat's in Denton.

911
00:35:08,700 --> 00:35:10,733
Address?

912
00:35:10,833 --> 00:35:13,633
Is she likely to have
shared it with anyone else?

913
00:35:13,733 --> 00:35:14,567
Pat?

914
00:35:14,667 --> 00:35:15,933
No way.

915
00:35:16,033 --> 00:35:19,033
Only thing that she's given
anyone in 50 years is herpes.

916
00:35:19,133 --> 00:35:22,167
VERONICA: Come here!

917
00:35:22,267 --> 00:35:24,167
You're a fucking liar
'cause everyone 'round here

918
00:35:24,267 --> 00:35:25,567
knows it we you.
- Fine!

919
00:35:25,667 --> 00:35:27,400
OK!
Me.

920
00:35:27,500 --> 00:35:28,867
Me and Lip.

921
00:35:28,967 --> 00:35:30,567
But not 'cause me
knew what it was.

922
00:35:30,667 --> 00:35:31,500
So?

923
00:35:31,600 --> 00:35:32,500
So!

924
00:35:32,600 --> 00:35:34,233
We just thought it
was fucking meat!

925
00:35:34,333 --> 00:35:36,567
Where's the money?

926
00:35:36,667 --> 00:35:38,433
You're wearing most of it.

927
00:35:38,533 --> 00:35:39,767
What?

928
00:35:39,867 --> 00:35:44,067
How much do you think lace
crotchless panties cost me?

929
00:35:44,167 --> 00:35:46,333
Right, Kev, that's the
last beef curtain you'll

930
00:35:46,433 --> 00:35:48,733
be seeing in a long time.

931
00:35:48,833 --> 00:35:52,633
Where's the rest of it?

932
00:35:52,733 --> 00:35:55,567
[jar rattles]

933
00:35:58,467 --> 00:35:59,800
This money's got blood on it.

934
00:35:59,900 --> 00:36:04,267
You're in deep shit and
everybody wants you dead, Kev.

935
00:36:04,367 --> 00:36:07,667
This is all your
fault. Twisted shit!

936
00:36:07,767 --> 00:36:09,833
Yeah, I know.
Everything is.

937
00:36:09,933 --> 00:36:11,100
Pepe.
[barks]

938
00:36:11,200 --> 00:36:13,767
Arndale Centre,
crucifixion, miner's strike.

939
00:36:13,867 --> 00:36:16,133
Fine, bring it on!

940
00:36:16,233 --> 00:36:19,300
[music playing]

941
00:36:34,133 --> 00:36:35,600
Can I get you anything?

942
00:36:40,667 --> 00:36:43,200
Could skin up if it'll help.

943
00:36:43,300 --> 00:36:44,133
No.

944
00:36:58,000 --> 00:36:58,900
Ian, I'm really sorry.

945
00:36:59,000 --> 00:37:03,767
This is my fault. The meat.

946
00:37:03,867 --> 00:37:05,300
It was me-- me and Kev.

947
00:37:05,400 --> 00:37:07,767
We ripped a lorry
off on the bypass.

948
00:37:07,867 --> 00:37:08,867
[sighs]

949
00:37:08,967 --> 00:37:14,400
Well-- It was
just for a laugh.

950
00:37:14,500 --> 00:37:17,900
I promise you, we're going
to get you a proper hospital.

951
00:37:18,000 --> 00:37:19,033
I don't care what I have to do.

952
00:37:19,133 --> 00:37:20,500
Honestly, Ian.

953
00:37:20,600 --> 00:37:22,333
I'd do anything for you not
to be laid here like this.

954
00:37:26,400 --> 00:37:28,100
I'm sorry.

955
00:37:28,200 --> 00:37:31,233
[helicopter blades turning]

956
00:37:32,733 --> 00:37:35,600
[music playing]

957
00:37:40,467 --> 00:37:42,267
SOLDIER (ON RADIO):
Breaker in sector

958
00:37:42,367 --> 00:37:44,267
nine coming over the roof.

959
00:37:48,067 --> 00:37:49,467
SOLDIER: Whoa!

960
00:37:49,567 --> 00:37:50,433
Keep walking.

961
00:37:50,533 --> 00:37:51,233
Just keep walking.

962
00:37:51,333 --> 00:37:52,700
No, not towards me, darling.

963
00:37:52,800 --> 00:37:55,100
The other way.

964
00:37:55,200 --> 00:37:56,700
How old are you, Debbie?

965
00:37:56,800 --> 00:37:58,067
11.

966
00:37:58,167 --> 00:38:00,867
Well, 11 if you ask my
dad, 12 if you ask my mum.

967
00:38:00,967 --> 00:38:02,500
COMMANDER: Where
were you going?

968
00:38:02,600 --> 00:38:03,533
Shopping.

969
00:38:03,633 --> 00:38:06,700
COMMANDER: At 01:25?

970
00:38:06,800 --> 00:38:08,500
The Trafford Centre's
open all night for Christmas

971
00:38:08,600 --> 00:38:10,000
and the they're
letting free buses on.

972
00:38:10,100 --> 00:38:11,600
I've six presents still to buy.

973
00:38:11,700 --> 00:38:13,133
And it's Christmas tomorrow, so.

974
00:38:13,233 --> 00:38:14,667
COMMANDER: You knew
perfectly well that you

975
00:38:14,767 --> 00:38:16,633
were leaving a restricted zone.

976
00:38:16,733 --> 00:38:20,733
You've lied to my officers
and you're lying to me.

977
00:38:20,833 --> 00:38:21,667
DEBBIE: OK.

978
00:38:21,767 --> 00:38:23,267
I've five presents to buy.

979
00:38:23,367 --> 00:38:24,800
I'll give Carl something
I got last year,

980
00:38:24,900 --> 00:38:27,267
but its still got the plastic
on so it looks spanking new.

981
00:38:27,367 --> 00:38:28,967
'Cause he loves
driving, but everyone

982
00:38:29,067 --> 00:38:30,800
'round here keeps the
batteries dead to stop

983
00:38:30,900 --> 00:38:32,467
truckers going ape.

984
00:38:32,567 --> 00:38:35,167
A pair of jump leads.

985
00:38:35,267 --> 00:38:37,433
Please, can somebody
help me out here?

986
00:38:37,533 --> 00:38:38,233
SOLDIER: Yes, sir.

987
00:38:38,333 --> 00:38:39,500
I'm from around these parts.

988
00:38:39,600 --> 00:38:41,367
DEBBIE: Oh are you
playing maisonette?

989
00:38:41,467 --> 00:38:42,700
No, Pontoon.

990
00:38:42,800 --> 00:38:44,833
Oh, well we call it maisonette,
because when you turn 21,

991
00:38:44,933 --> 00:38:46,567
that's what you
get at the council.

992
00:38:46,667 --> 00:38:48,533
[laughing]

993
00:38:48,633 --> 00:38:51,500
[music playing]

994
00:38:56,800 --> 00:38:59,300
There's three cameras
covering the Causeway,

995
00:38:59,400 --> 00:39:02,800
two monitoring Denver
Road, and about 3,000

996
00:39:02,900 --> 00:39:03,933
soldiers on Plymouth Street.

997
00:39:04,033 --> 00:39:04,833
All right.

998
00:39:04,933 --> 00:39:05,967
Come on, Debbie.

999
00:39:06,067 --> 00:39:06,900
About 100.

1000
00:39:07,000 --> 00:39:08,000
But at least 100.

1001
00:39:08,100 --> 00:39:09,533
And they didn't
shove you around?

1002
00:39:09,633 --> 00:39:14,000
No, I got a tuna salad and
I won a fiver on maisonette.

1003
00:39:14,100 --> 00:39:16,867
FIONA: Debbie did you
get anything or not?

1004
00:39:16,967 --> 00:39:19,467
[bells jingling]

1005
00:39:20,467 --> 00:39:22,567
Yes.

1006
00:39:22,667 --> 00:39:24,033
DEBBIE: Didn't have
normal number plates,

1007
00:39:24,133 --> 00:39:24,967
just a number on the tag.

1008
00:39:25,067 --> 00:39:26,433
STEVE: Right.

1009
00:39:26,533 --> 00:39:27,900
Let's get Ian out of here
of here as fast as possible.

1010
00:39:28,000 --> 00:39:29,267
If we spread out, we'll
find the vehicle faster.

1011
00:39:29,367 --> 00:39:30,633
Lip, you'll have to
take Kev with you.

1012
00:39:30,733 --> 00:39:32,600
Tell him to keep his face
covered or he's dead.

1013
00:39:32,700 --> 00:39:34,067
Marty, you go with them.

1014
00:39:34,167 --> 00:39:35,467
I'm sure you could start a
distraction if we need one.

1015
00:39:35,567 --> 00:39:37,100
Fiona, you best tell
Ian what's happening

1016
00:39:37,200 --> 00:39:38,533
so he doesn't freak out.
All right?

1017
00:39:38,633 --> 00:39:39,933
SHEILA: Oh!
Oh!

1018
00:39:40,033 --> 00:39:40,900
Oh, dear!

1019
00:39:41,000 --> 00:39:42,467
Oh!
- Sheila?

1020
00:39:42,567 --> 00:39:43,433
SHEILA: Oh, yeah.

1021
00:39:43,533 --> 00:39:45,400
Oh, it's OK.

1022
00:39:45,500 --> 00:39:46,433
He just kicked.

1023
00:39:46,533 --> 00:39:47,767
He?
He!

1024
00:39:47,867 --> 00:39:49,100
So you know it's a boy?

1025
00:39:49,200 --> 00:39:52,967
Oh, God, that was
supposed to be a big secret.

1026
00:39:53,067 --> 00:39:54,867
Nice, deep breaths.

1027
00:39:54,967 --> 00:39:57,067
Mom, brandy.

1028
00:39:57,167 --> 00:39:58,500
SHEILA: Don't tell your dad.

1029
00:39:58,600 --> 00:40:00,133
It's supposed to
be a big surprise.

1030
00:40:00,233 --> 00:40:02,167
DEBBIE: Have you got
a name for him yet?

1031
00:40:02,267 --> 00:40:06,367
Yeah-- if we
ever get that far.

1032
00:40:06,467 --> 00:40:08,633
FIONA: Oh, don't talk like
that, Sheila, sweetheart.

1033
00:40:08,733 --> 00:40:11,600
SHEILA: What if I passed
something on to him

1034
00:40:11,700 --> 00:40:13,400
through the meat?

1035
00:40:13,500 --> 00:40:14,767
Ah, ooh, hey.

1036
00:40:14,867 --> 00:40:17,667
[screaming]

1037
00:40:17,767 --> 00:40:20,033
MARTY: Bucket biff.

1038
00:40:20,133 --> 00:40:21,733
JILLIAN: I told
him to come 'round.

1039
00:40:21,833 --> 00:40:23,800
The meats come from Al-Qaeda.

1040
00:40:23,900 --> 00:40:26,967
And if they scan the bar
code it comes up in Arabic.

1041
00:40:27,067 --> 00:40:30,200
I mean, I'm not being
a racist, but they're

1042
00:40:30,300 --> 00:40:31,933
a fucking nightmare that lot.

1043
00:40:32,033 --> 00:40:32,933
FRANK: One more.

1044
00:40:33,033 --> 00:40:34,033
No.

1045
00:40:34,133 --> 00:40:35,333
FRANK: Oh, more one, Jez.
Please!

1046
00:40:35,433 --> 00:40:36,300
No.

1047
00:40:36,400 --> 00:40:37,967
Four units each and
that's your lot.

1048
00:40:38,067 --> 00:40:39,267
Otherwise we'll be
dry by tomorrow.

1049
00:40:39,367 --> 00:40:41,500
Look, I can't get
another delivery through.

1050
00:40:41,600 --> 00:40:42,833
Hello!

1051
00:40:42,933 --> 00:40:45,500
If you name your price, you
could shift the lot tonight.

1052
00:40:45,600 --> 00:40:46,733
Hello!

1053
00:40:46,833 --> 00:40:51,400
If I ration it, I could name
twice me price tomorrow.

1054
00:40:51,500 --> 00:40:52,333
Robbing bitch.

1055
00:40:52,433 --> 00:40:53,167
On your way.

1056
00:40:53,267 --> 00:40:54,167
SERVER: All right!

1057
00:40:54,267 --> 00:40:55,433
I said I'm coming.

1058
00:40:55,533 --> 00:40:56,467
Bottle.

1059
00:40:56,567 --> 00:40:59,467
A little bottle to
be going home with.

1060
00:40:59,567 --> 00:41:02,533
[CROWD NOISE AND GLASSES
CLINKING]

1061
00:41:07,333 --> 00:41:09,167
[cash register rings]

1062
00:41:09,267 --> 00:41:10,367
[door bell rings]

1063
00:41:10,467 --> 00:41:11,233
FIONA: Kash I need
to speak to your mum

1064
00:41:11,333 --> 00:41:12,233
Hey, where's your Ian?

1065
00:41:12,333 --> 00:41:13,700
We need a hand 'round here.

1066
00:41:13,800 --> 00:41:15,200
I heard they're about to
ration the booze at the pub

1067
00:41:15,300 --> 00:41:16,900
because they can't get
a delivery through.

1068
00:41:17,000 --> 00:41:19,400
I have stuck a quid on
the price of everything.

1069
00:41:19,500 --> 00:41:22,300
And look, I can say it
out loud and not one peep.

1070
00:41:22,400 --> 00:41:23,433
Ho!

1071
00:41:23,533 --> 00:41:25,033
Form an orderly queue or
you're getting fuck all!

1072
00:41:25,133 --> 00:41:26,033
CUSTOMER: Cheery-bye

1073
00:41:26,133 --> 00:41:27,967
Merry Christmas, love.

1074
00:41:28,067 --> 00:41:29,133
Where's your mum, Kash?

1075
00:41:29,233 --> 00:41:30,200
Upstairs helping
the kids counting

1076
00:41:30,300 --> 00:41:32,133
the money to keep them calm.
Why?

1077
00:41:32,233 --> 00:41:36,100
Sheila's gone into labor,
plus Ian's in a right state.

1078
00:41:36,200 --> 00:41:39,567
[register rings]

1079
00:41:39,667 --> 00:41:40,667
[dog barks] Can

1080
00:41:40,767 --> 00:41:42,833
SHEILA: Can somebody
change the wallpaper?

1081
00:41:42,933 --> 00:41:44,933
It's doing in me head in!

1082
00:41:45,033 --> 00:41:46,367
You're really hurting
my hand, Sheila.

1083
00:41:46,467 --> 00:41:47,133
Ow!

1084
00:41:47,233 --> 00:41:48,733
Sheila, this is Umi.

1085
00:41:48,833 --> 00:41:49,867
It's OK, Sheila.

1086
00:41:49,967 --> 00:41:52,133
Keep calm.

1087
00:41:52,233 --> 00:41:53,633
She's a midwife.

1088
00:41:53,733 --> 00:41:54,700
She's not just saying that?

1089
00:41:54,800 --> 00:41:55,867
Oh-ho, Ho-ho!

1090
00:41:55,967 --> 00:41:57,600
Why would I say it
if it wasn't true?

1091
00:41:57,700 --> 00:41:59,533
I don't know!

1092
00:41:59,633 --> 00:42:00,633
No.

1093
00:42:00,733 --> 00:42:01,567
Don't push.

1094
00:42:01,667 --> 00:42:03,433
Just breath 'round it.

1095
00:42:03,533 --> 00:42:06,100
I had a dentist once who
turned out to be a brickie,

1096
00:42:06,200 --> 00:42:07,900
so I'm a bit phobic.

1097
00:42:08,000 --> 00:42:09,833
Stop pushing!

1098
00:42:09,933 --> 00:42:11,200
[tense music playing]

1099
00:42:11,300 --> 00:42:14,133
Just keep back, like I said.

1100
00:42:14,233 --> 00:42:15,933
Listen, if I don't
get this giro cashed,

1101
00:42:16,033 --> 00:42:17,467
I'm going to have
nothing to feed my kids!

1102
00:42:17,567 --> 00:42:19,200
Look, this is
from a week back.

1103
00:42:19,300 --> 00:42:20,200
Why didn't you cash it then.

1104
00:42:20,300 --> 00:42:22,000
Because it's not in my name.

1105
00:42:22,100 --> 00:42:24,667
I've had to work on the
signature, smart ass.

1106
00:42:24,767 --> 00:42:26,000
Fuck.
Cheers.

1107
00:42:26,100 --> 00:42:27,267
What, starving
children and you're not

1108
00:42:27,367 --> 00:42:28,700
going to let me through, yeah?
Cheers!

1109
00:42:28,800 --> 00:42:29,600
Thanks a lot.

1110
00:42:29,700 --> 00:42:31,000
You too as well, mate.

1111
00:42:31,100 --> 00:42:32,533
And that's it for you, mug.
KEV: Yeah, all right.

1112
00:42:32,633 --> 00:42:33,433
Yeah, all right.

1113
00:42:33,533 --> 00:42:34,467
Stay cool.

1114
00:42:34,567 --> 00:42:37,033
Nobody's going to
recognize like this.

1115
00:42:37,133 --> 00:42:39,600
[music continues]

1116
00:42:39,700 --> 00:42:42,567
[crowd yelling]

1117
00:42:49,033 --> 00:42:50,100
Fuck's sake!

1118
00:42:50,200 --> 00:42:51,000
That's hopeless.

1119
00:42:51,100 --> 00:42:52,200
I know.

1120
00:42:52,300 --> 00:42:53,900
I can't believe it's
on the wrong side

1121
00:42:54,000 --> 00:42:54,933
of the fucking fence.

1122
00:42:55,033 --> 00:42:56,000
MARTY: It's great, this.

1123
00:43:00,867 --> 00:43:01,700
Lip?

1124
00:43:04,233 --> 00:43:06,733
What's going on?

1125
00:43:06,833 --> 00:43:08,067
Your mum's gone into labor.

1126
00:43:08,167 --> 00:43:09,067
Right, let me through.

1127
00:43:09,167 --> 00:43:10,533
SOLDIER: Hey, nobody in or out.

1128
00:43:10,633 --> 00:43:11,900
I want me mum!

1129
00:43:12,000 --> 00:43:13,067
This is for your
own safety, love.

1130
00:43:13,167 --> 00:43:16,100
Stay where you are, right.
LIP: Karen!

1131
00:43:16,200 --> 00:43:19,167
[crowd yelling angrily]

1132
00:43:27,267 --> 00:43:28,700
PETE: I didn't say Swindon.

1133
00:43:28,800 --> 00:43:29,967
I said Swinton.

1134
00:43:30,067 --> 00:43:31,667
SOLDIER: Yeah, and I
said, you going nowhere.

1135
00:43:31,767 --> 00:43:33,867
No one leaves until their
blood tests are cleared.

1136
00:43:33,967 --> 00:43:35,133
We're all vegetarians.

1137
00:43:35,233 --> 00:43:36,500
We're not, are we?

1138
00:43:36,600 --> 00:43:39,133
No, son, and neither is
the other 100 over there.

1139
00:43:42,267 --> 00:43:43,167
Cheers, Clinton.

1140
00:43:43,267 --> 00:43:44,867
What are you like, you?

1141
00:43:44,967 --> 00:43:48,133
Me real dad.

1142
00:43:48,233 --> 00:43:51,233
[music continues]

1143
00:43:53,700 --> 00:43:56,533
[radio chatter]

1144
00:43:59,533 --> 00:44:02,233
Oh.

1145
00:44:02,333 --> 00:44:05,567
Has it got warmer
or is it just me?

1146
00:44:05,667 --> 00:44:07,867
I think it's
dropping to be honest.

1147
00:44:07,967 --> 00:44:09,700
KAREN: I think it's
all the tension.

1148
00:44:21,667 --> 00:44:24,533
[moaning]

1149
00:44:24,633 --> 00:44:28,067
[music continues]

1150
00:44:31,967 --> 00:44:35,000
[angry crowd yelling]

1151
00:44:40,667 --> 00:44:43,167
SOLDIER: I tell you what,
Colchester's all right.

1152
00:44:43,267 --> 00:44:45,133
I mean like anywhere's lonely
at Christmas doing this job,

1153
00:44:45,233 --> 00:44:47,267
you know what I mean?

1154
00:44:47,367 --> 00:44:48,600
I tell you something
now, darling,

1155
00:44:48,700 --> 00:44:49,967
it's better than Basra.

1156
00:44:50,067 --> 00:44:51,233
I can't tell ya how glad
I was to get out of there.

1157
00:44:51,333 --> 00:44:53,200
It was a right dump.

1158
00:44:53,300 --> 00:44:55,133
It's a right dump now, isn't it?

1159
00:44:55,233 --> 00:44:56,667
Mind you it's not as
bad as 'round here.

1160
00:44:56,767 --> 00:44:57,600
Oh.

1161
00:44:57,700 --> 00:44:58,800
Oh babe, that's it.

1162
00:44:58,900 --> 00:45:00,000
OFFICER (ON RADIO):
Corporal Pollack?

1163
00:45:00,100 --> 00:45:00,967
CORPORAL POLLACK: Oh.

1164
00:45:01,067 --> 00:45:02,433
Oh man, sorry babes.

1165
00:45:02,533 --> 00:45:03,467
Shit!

1166
00:45:03,567 --> 00:45:07,067
I'll speak to you
later on, all right?

1167
00:45:07,167 --> 00:45:10,200
[music continues]

1168
00:45:11,733 --> 00:45:13,200
CORPORAL POLLACK: All right.

1169
00:45:20,700 --> 00:45:23,567
[rock music playing]

1170
00:45:39,033 --> 00:45:41,933
[brakes squeak]

1171
00:45:42,033 --> 00:45:43,333
LIP: Come on then,
let's get him!

1172
00:45:43,433 --> 00:45:47,200
We can be at St.
George's in ten minutes.

1173
00:45:47,300 --> 00:45:49,400
I'll keep it running
'case we have to shift it.

1174
00:45:49,500 --> 00:45:51,633
All right.

1175
00:45:51,733 --> 00:45:54,567
[engine idling]

1176
00:45:57,033 --> 00:45:58,400
PETE: Stan!

1177
00:45:58,500 --> 00:46:00,467
Found him!

1178
00:46:00,567 --> 00:46:03,467
[angry mob yells]

1179
00:46:09,300 --> 00:46:10,400
Are you all right, sweetheart?

1180
00:46:10,500 --> 00:46:12,233
No, I feel sick.

1181
00:46:12,333 --> 00:46:14,300
VERONICA: Yeah, we all do.

1182
00:46:14,400 --> 00:46:15,967
I've got an old
wheelchair next door.

1183
00:46:16,067 --> 00:46:19,367
That's all right,
just get these undone.

1184
00:46:19,467 --> 00:46:22,300
[mob yelling]

1185
00:46:23,833 --> 00:46:24,667
Shit!

1186
00:46:24,767 --> 00:46:26,767
Kev!

1187
00:46:26,867 --> 00:46:28,333
Steve, Sheila needs ya.

1188
00:46:28,433 --> 00:46:30,467
STEVE: Listen, put him back to
bed, and then go find a media.

1189
00:46:30,567 --> 00:46:32,267
All right?

1190
00:46:32,367 --> 00:46:35,367
[mob continues to shout]

1191
00:46:36,867 --> 00:46:38,133
Fuck off!

1192
00:46:38,233 --> 00:46:40,667
STAN: That was my
mother, you twat!

1193
00:46:40,767 --> 00:46:41,667
I'm going to have your neck!

1194
00:46:41,767 --> 00:46:42,633
It wasn't me.

1195
00:46:42,733 --> 00:46:43,567
You're joking.

1196
00:46:43,667 --> 00:46:46,100
For fuck's sake!

1197
00:46:46,200 --> 00:46:47,033
VERONICA: Right!

1198
00:46:47,133 --> 00:46:49,600
CARL: What are you doing?

1199
00:46:49,700 --> 00:46:50,567
VERONICA: Kevin!

1200
00:46:50,667 --> 00:46:51,767
[mob yelling]

1201
00:46:51,867 --> 00:46:52,933
TONY: Calm down!

1202
00:46:53,033 --> 00:46:54,333
Calm down!

1203
00:46:54,433 --> 00:46:55,900
What good's this doing anyone?

1204
00:46:56,000 --> 00:46:57,467
I'm giving you one choice!

1205
00:46:57,567 --> 00:47:00,433
Get of!

1206
00:47:00,533 --> 00:47:01,467
VERONICA: All right!

1207
00:47:01,567 --> 00:47:04,700
Back off or one of
you's getting this!

1208
00:47:04,800 --> 00:47:05,633
CARL: Get off it.

1209
00:47:05,733 --> 00:47:07,000
Look what he's done.

1210
00:47:07,100 --> 00:47:09,367
People dropping
like fucking flies!

1211
00:47:09,467 --> 00:47:10,900
Yeah, so why aren't
you blaming the army?

1212
00:47:11,000 --> 00:47:12,533
JILLIAN: We didn't
buy it off the army.

1213
00:47:12,633 --> 00:47:14,133
LIP: But we didn't bloody
load it with Anthrax

1214
00:47:14,233 --> 00:47:15,300
or whatever it is?

1215
00:47:15,400 --> 00:47:16,400
Anthrax!

1216
00:47:16,500 --> 00:47:17,433
Are you serious?

1217
00:47:17,533 --> 00:47:18,933
LIP: I don't know,
but it's there fore

1218
00:47:19,033 --> 00:47:20,567
because the army put it there.

1219
00:47:20,667 --> 00:47:22,333
Ask him.

1220
00:47:22,433 --> 00:47:23,267
Me?

1221
00:47:23,367 --> 00:47:24,500
Why me?

1222
00:47:24,600 --> 00:47:26,700
For fuck's sake, Tony,
none of this is down to us.

1223
00:47:26,800 --> 00:47:27,933
Ask him.

1224
00:47:28,033 --> 00:47:28,833
Will you listen, right.

1225
00:47:28,933 --> 00:47:30,033
Just listen.

1226
00:47:30,133 --> 00:47:31,000
The lad's right.

1227
00:47:31,100 --> 00:47:32,100
Nearly right.

1228
00:47:32,200 --> 00:47:33,600
All this shit's got
a lot more to do

1229
00:47:33,700 --> 00:47:35,867
with the army than anything
to do with this lot.

1230
00:47:35,967 --> 00:47:37,167
PETE: Deliberately?

1231
00:47:37,267 --> 00:47:38,333
Look, the army
is the only place

1232
00:47:38,433 --> 00:47:40,000
you're going to get vaccine.

1233
00:47:40,100 --> 00:47:41,967
Tell 'em, Tony.

1234
00:47:42,067 --> 00:47:43,533
PETE: They said
there wasn't one.

1235
00:47:43,633 --> 00:47:46,367
That's what they told us, but
I reckon they're bullshitting.

1236
00:47:46,467 --> 00:47:48,133
Fuck would you
know, Gallagher?

1237
00:47:48,233 --> 00:47:52,767
What if they're just waiting
to see what happens, eh?

1238
00:47:52,867 --> 00:47:54,267
So there is a vaccine.

1239
00:47:54,367 --> 00:47:55,900
But he's telling
you what we think.

1240
00:47:56,000 --> 00:47:58,800
And we know more than most.

1241
00:47:58,900 --> 00:48:00,200
[music playing]

1242
00:48:00,300 --> 00:48:03,333
MOB: Come on, then!

1243
00:48:03,433 --> 00:48:04,333
Oh, fuck.

1244
00:48:04,433 --> 00:48:05,733
PETE: Come on!

1245
00:48:05,833 --> 00:48:07,700
Come on!

1246
00:48:07,800 --> 00:48:10,100
This is our Estate not yours!

1247
00:48:10,200 --> 00:48:11,667
Giving us anthrax!

1248
00:48:11,767 --> 00:48:13,267
We'll give you anthrax!

1249
00:48:13,367 --> 00:48:14,600
Come on!

1250
00:48:14,700 --> 00:48:17,867
This is the Chatsworth Estate
and we're taking it back!

1251
00:48:17,967 --> 00:48:21,900
We've had enough of the army
and the police coming down here!

1252
00:48:22,000 --> 00:48:23,867
It's a redemption zone.

1253
00:48:23,967 --> 00:48:27,133
Jah Rastafari!

1254
00:48:27,233 --> 00:48:28,300
Give me a consonant.

1255
00:48:28,400 --> 00:48:30,100
Oh, C.

1256
00:48:30,200 --> 00:48:31,667
Give me a vowel.

1257
00:48:31,767 --> 00:48:33,067
U.

1258
00:48:33,167 --> 00:48:34,900
Give me another consonant.

1259
00:48:35,000 --> 00:48:37,967
N. How we're gonna get Ian
out now we've lost the truck?

1260
00:48:38,067 --> 00:48:38,900
FIONA: Don't know, Lip.

1261
00:48:39,000 --> 00:48:40,833
Is nobody up there with him?

1262
00:48:40,933 --> 00:48:42,100
I'll go up.

1263
00:48:42,200 --> 00:48:44,100
Give me another
consonant, Carol.

1264
00:48:46,667 --> 00:48:47,367
T

1265
00:48:47,467 --> 00:48:48,600
VERONICA: Are you all right?

1266
00:48:48,700 --> 00:48:50,067
Oh.

1267
00:48:50,167 --> 00:48:51,667
VERONICA: Look, kid, if you
throw up, I can't help ya.

1268
00:48:51,767 --> 00:48:52,567
I want Frank!

1269
00:48:55,500 --> 00:48:58,967
FRANK: Life under
President Blair!

1270
00:48:59,067 --> 00:49:00,233
SOLDIER (ON SPEAKER):
Could you please

1271
00:49:00,333 --> 00:49:01,867
all return to your homes.

1272
00:49:01,967 --> 00:49:03,800
PETE: Go on, get out of here.

1273
00:49:03,900 --> 00:49:06,833
SOLDIER: (ON SPEAKER) The
situation is under control.

1274
00:49:06,933 --> 00:49:08,200
PETE: Take it to
the White House!

1275
00:49:08,300 --> 00:49:09,333
FRANK: Not in my name!

1276
00:49:09,433 --> 00:49:10,867
PETE: We don't want
you 'round here.

1277
00:49:10,967 --> 00:49:13,067
We're not having you
on this Estate anymore!

1278
00:49:13,167 --> 00:49:14,733
Let us through!

1279
00:49:14,833 --> 00:49:18,167
We've heard it straight from
the fucking horse's mouth.

1280
00:49:18,267 --> 00:49:20,000
You know a lot more
than you're telling us!

1281
00:49:20,100 --> 00:49:21,100
And we've had enough!

1282
00:49:24,067 --> 00:49:26,467
FRANK: You know why
they call 'em fatigues?

1283
00:49:26,567 --> 00:49:31,100
'Cause we're sick of the
fucking sights of ya!

1284
00:49:31,200 --> 00:49:35,033
Stopping vital deliveries.

1285
00:49:35,133 --> 00:49:39,900
While the rest of us just--

1286
00:49:40,000 --> 00:49:42,700
no, thinking.

1287
00:49:42,800 --> 00:49:43,600
Baby Jesus.

1288
00:49:50,400 --> 00:49:52,867
Well I've been on the
blower to Brussels

1289
00:49:52,967 --> 00:49:55,800
and you are all sacked!

1290
00:49:55,900 --> 00:49:58,767
[CROWD FIGHTING
& GLASS BREAKING]

1291
00:50:03,200 --> 00:50:04,667
SOLDIER: Who threw that?

1292
00:50:04,767 --> 00:50:06,067
Oi, you!

1293
00:50:06,167 --> 00:50:10,333
COMMANDER: Will you please
just shut the fuck up?

1294
00:50:12,933 --> 00:50:17,900
While you've been making your
lives a lot more difficult

1295
00:50:18,000 --> 00:50:20,767
for yourselves and
the rest of us,

1296
00:50:20,867 --> 00:50:27,100
people have been working 'round
the clock to find the solution.

1297
00:50:27,200 --> 00:50:31,167
The contamination
has been identified.

1298
00:50:31,267 --> 00:50:34,567
Vaccines are already being
administered to high priority

1299
00:50:34,667 --> 00:50:36,533
cases as I speak.

1300
00:50:36,633 --> 00:50:40,100
They'll be with you
as soon as possible.

1301
00:50:40,200 --> 00:50:44,133
But until they arrive,
will you please continue

1302
00:50:44,233 --> 00:50:49,000
to just shut the fuck up!

1303
00:50:49,100 --> 00:50:50,167
I don't like his tone.

1304
00:50:53,133 --> 00:50:56,067
FRANK: It's like being in
fucking Guantanamo Bay.

1305
00:50:56,167 --> 00:50:57,400
You don't know.

1306
00:50:57,500 --> 00:51:00,433
[mumbling]

1307
00:51:00,533 --> 00:51:01,867
IAN: Leave me alone!

1308
00:51:01,967 --> 00:51:03,100
Leave me alone!

1309
00:51:03,200 --> 00:51:04,567
Ian, I have to do this.

1310
00:51:04,667 --> 00:51:07,167
It takes less than a minute
if you just keep still.

1311
00:51:07,267 --> 00:51:08,800
FIONA: Come on Ian, no
one's messing about.

1312
00:51:08,900 --> 00:51:09,833
Now he knows what he's doing!

1313
00:51:09,933 --> 00:51:10,767
IAN: I don't care.

1314
00:51:10,867 --> 00:51:11,967
Fuck off!

1315
00:51:12,067 --> 00:51:13,433
Pin him down.

1316
00:51:13,533 --> 00:51:14,567
Kev.

1317
00:51:14,667 --> 00:51:16,533
Look, it's pretty heavy.

1318
00:51:16,633 --> 00:51:18,467
It'll hurt when it
goes in a little bit.

1319
00:51:18,567 --> 00:51:20,167
A bit of a dead leg.

1320
00:51:20,267 --> 00:51:22,600
But I promise you,
it's effective.

1321
00:51:22,700 --> 00:51:24,533
IAN: Oh.

1322
00:51:24,633 --> 00:51:25,467
Ow!

1323
00:51:29,367 --> 00:51:30,033
Ow!

1324
00:51:30,133 --> 00:51:32,300
You fucking bastard!

1325
00:51:32,400 --> 00:51:35,167
Ow!

1326
00:51:35,267 --> 00:51:37,433
Ow.

1327
00:51:37,533 --> 00:51:40,667
Now if keep his leg
moving it'll circulate it.

1328
00:51:40,767 --> 00:51:42,033
He'll be fine.
- Honestly?

1329
00:51:42,133 --> 00:51:43,567
DOCTOR: Just keep
his leg moving.

1330
00:51:49,433 --> 00:51:51,767
KEV: Ian, mate.

1331
00:51:51,867 --> 00:51:53,233
I can't tell you how sorry I am.

1332
00:51:56,600 --> 00:51:58,967
IAN: Well you can, Kev.

1333
00:51:59,067 --> 00:52:00,767
Try.

1334
00:52:00,867 --> 00:52:04,300
DOCTOR: 16 Princess
Margaret Drive.

1335
00:52:04,400 --> 00:52:05,700
CARL: Have you
got any more puns?

1336
00:52:09,333 --> 00:52:11,033
Shit!

1337
00:52:11,133 --> 00:52:14,167
[labored breathing]

1338
00:52:15,733 --> 00:52:16,533
FIONA: Shit!

1339
00:52:16,633 --> 00:52:17,333
What now?

1340
00:52:17,433 --> 00:52:19,133
Have we got any fuse wire?

1341
00:52:19,233 --> 00:52:22,267
SHEILA: Give us
another consonant.

1342
00:52:22,367 --> 00:52:23,467
L.

1343
00:52:23,567 --> 00:52:26,033
DEBBIE: Don't know why you
boiling water for, Carl.

1344
00:52:26,133 --> 00:52:27,967
Mother of God!

1345
00:52:28,067 --> 00:52:29,533
No, Sheila!

1346
00:52:29,633 --> 00:52:31,133
You only do that when you are
actually getting a contraction.

1347
00:52:31,233 --> 00:52:33,933
Oh, yeah, sorry.

1348
00:52:34,033 --> 00:52:36,933
I'm all over the
place, aren't I?

1349
00:52:37,033 --> 00:52:38,800
Give us a couple of vowels.

1350
00:52:38,900 --> 00:52:40,700
A. I.

1351
00:52:40,800 --> 00:52:42,133
You're getting one now.

1352
00:52:42,233 --> 00:52:43,333
Boy or girl?

1353
00:52:43,433 --> 00:52:44,467
STEVE: I thought you
said it was a boy?

1354
00:52:44,567 --> 00:52:46,000
Oh, yeah.

1355
00:52:46,100 --> 00:52:47,300
And I meant a contraction.

1356
00:52:47,400 --> 00:52:49,800
Five, four, three, two, one.

1357
00:52:49,900 --> 00:52:50,800
[groaning]

1358
00:52:50,900 --> 00:52:53,333
Come on, Sheila!

1359
00:52:53,433 --> 00:52:55,700
Lunatic!

1360
00:52:55,800 --> 00:52:57,500
[laughing]

1361
00:52:57,600 --> 00:53:01,033
I've never had
seven letters before!

1362
00:53:01,133 --> 00:53:04,133
[all laughing]

1363
00:53:07,367 --> 00:53:08,000
Come

1364
00:53:08,100 --> 00:53:10,867
[doorbell rings]

1365
00:53:10,967 --> 00:53:11,967
[christmas music playing]

1366
00:53:12,067 --> 00:53:12,933
STEVE: Come on, Sheila.

1367
00:53:13,033 --> 00:53:14,500
UMI: That's it, Sheila.

1368
00:53:14,600 --> 00:53:16,867
It wasn't for nothing.

1369
00:53:16,967 --> 00:53:18,433
It's a boy!

1370
00:53:18,533 --> 00:53:19,833
You have a son!

1371
00:53:19,933 --> 00:53:21,400
FIONA: He's beautiful.

1372
00:53:27,233 --> 00:53:29,533
Oh, geez, is that what
they come out looking like?

1373
00:53:29,633 --> 00:53:31,267
Mine were both a bit
smoother than that.

1374
00:53:31,367 --> 00:53:32,700
Oh, no offense, Sheila.

1375
00:53:32,800 --> 00:53:33,633
Congratulations.

1376
00:53:33,733 --> 00:53:36,167
[baby cries]

1377
00:53:36,267 --> 00:53:38,933
Oh.

1378
00:53:39,033 --> 00:53:40,600
Where's Frank, anyway?

1379
00:53:44,367 --> 00:53:46,900
Slag!

1380
00:53:47,000 --> 00:53:49,800
[choir sings]

1381
00:53:49,900 --> 00:53:52,567
[baby cries]

1382
00:53:52,667 --> 00:53:56,067
[choir continues]

1383
00:54:06,600 --> 00:54:10,867
Bombs on planes and
contaminated meat at--

1384
00:54:10,967 --> 00:54:11,933
you know, thingy.

1385
00:54:12,033 --> 00:54:13,200
Little baby Jesus.

1386
00:54:13,300 --> 00:54:16,300
It's fucking ridiculous.

1387
00:54:16,400 --> 00:54:18,933
Who suffers?

1388
00:54:19,033 --> 00:54:20,233
The likes of us.
That's who.

1389
00:54:20,333 --> 00:54:21,733
What have we done wrong?

1390
00:54:21,833 --> 00:54:24,333
Apart from fixing the odd
meter and ringing the odd car.

1391
00:54:24,433 --> 00:54:27,133
I said to Conrad,
"Call 'em all you want.

1392
00:54:27,233 --> 00:54:29,700
If they all went on
strike, we'd be legless."

1393
00:54:29,800 --> 00:54:35,000
You know, shops, hospitals,
the entire fucking transport

1394
00:54:35,100 --> 00:54:36,600
system.

1395
00:54:36,700 --> 00:54:40,567
If every immigrant on
this sceptered Isle

1396
00:54:40,667 --> 00:54:42,500
downed tools for one day--

1397
00:54:42,600 --> 00:54:49,333
one day-- we'd come to a
total fucking standstill.

1398
00:54:49,433 --> 00:54:52,267
Then they'd really
have us by the balls.

1399
00:54:52,367 --> 00:54:55,133
[laughing]

1400
00:54:55,233 --> 00:54:59,900
Hey, but don't let that go
giving you any ideas, Gandhi.

1401
00:55:00,000 --> 00:55:01,867
Otherwise, you know,
we'll have, er--

1402
00:55:01,967 --> 00:55:04,500
I forget-- what's his name.

1403
00:55:04,600 --> 00:55:06,967
You know, Kilroy,
on your doorstep,

1404
00:55:07,067 --> 00:55:09,200
pestering you for the vote.

1405
00:55:09,300 --> 00:55:12,900
Yak, yak, fucking yak.

1406
00:55:13,000 --> 00:55:15,900
Nightmare.

1407
00:55:16,000 --> 00:55:16,800
Hey.

1408
00:55:28,700 --> 00:55:29,733
Shouldn't you be lying down?

1409
00:55:29,833 --> 00:55:31,300
IAN: No.

1410
00:55:31,400 --> 00:55:33,500
I don't want to be
in this room anymore.

1411
00:55:33,600 --> 00:55:35,433
Medic said I should
stretch my legs anyway.

1412
00:55:35,533 --> 00:55:36,833
It

1413
00:55:36,933 --> 00:55:38,800
So how come you never phoned
me somehow to tell me how ill

1414
00:55:38,900 --> 00:55:40,400
you were?

1415
00:55:40,500 --> 00:55:41,133
Too tired.

1416
00:55:41,233 --> 00:55:43,933
I couldn't be fucked.

1417
00:55:44,033 --> 00:55:48,800
Look, if I'm in the way between
you and Yvonne, just say so.

1418
00:55:48,900 --> 00:55:50,733
Yvonne has been good to us.

1419
00:55:50,833 --> 00:55:52,933
We should be grateful.

1420
00:55:53,033 --> 00:55:55,100
Me, for the kids.

1421
00:55:55,200 --> 00:55:57,167
You, for the wages.

1422
00:55:57,267 --> 00:55:58,267
The pair of us,
because she never

1423
00:55:58,367 --> 00:56:01,900
put out a gay-bashing fatwa.

1424
00:56:02,000 --> 00:56:05,000
She could have ended
all this and she ain't.

1425
00:56:05,100 --> 00:56:09,767
She's far from perfect,
but neither are we.

1426
00:56:13,267 --> 00:56:15,167
So what did you
get me for Christmas?

1427
00:56:15,267 --> 00:56:17,700
Eh, slippers with
built-in headlamps.

1428
00:56:17,800 --> 00:56:19,400
Fuck off!
Yeah, what'd you get me?

1429
00:56:19,500 --> 00:56:20,300
Penis enlarger.

1430
00:56:23,933 --> 00:56:24,833
Same goes for you.

1431
00:56:24,933 --> 00:56:26,067
- Me?
- Yeah, you.

1432
00:56:26,167 --> 00:56:27,133
VERONICA: Oh, yeah?

1433
00:56:27,233 --> 00:56:28,300
I don't like your bathroom.

1434
00:56:28,400 --> 00:56:30,033
Well stay out of
then, smelly ass.

1435
00:56:30,133 --> 00:56:31,600
KEV: Ah, leave him
alone, he's tanked.

1436
00:56:31,700 --> 00:56:32,633
Who let him get like that?

1437
00:56:32,733 --> 00:56:33,867
LIP: She did.

1438
00:56:33,967 --> 00:56:34,867
VERONICA: We're just
celebrating the fact

1439
00:56:34,967 --> 00:56:35,933
that you're not dead, Ian!

1440
00:56:36,033 --> 00:56:37,833
Come on Carl, drink this.

1441
00:56:37,933 --> 00:56:39,567
And you, your robbing bastard!

1442
00:56:39,667 --> 00:56:40,933
Carl cut it out.

1443
00:56:41,033 --> 00:56:43,000
How much your
Twix meant to be?

1444
00:56:43,100 --> 00:56:44,367
KASH: 49p.

1445
00:56:44,467 --> 00:56:46,500
So how much is quarter of
midget gems meant to be?

1446
00:56:46,600 --> 00:56:47,633
28 Pence.

1447
00:56:47,733 --> 00:56:49,467
Yes, so how much is it
meant to come to then,

1448
00:56:49,567 --> 00:56:50,233
you robbing bastard?

1449
00:56:50,333 --> 00:56:51,733
IAN: Carl, I'm warning ya.

1450
00:56:51,833 --> 00:56:53,000
77 Pence.

1451
00:56:53,100 --> 00:56:54,733
No it's not, It's 77.

1452
00:56:54,833 --> 00:56:56,900
Yeah, I said 77 Pence.

1453
00:56:57,000 --> 00:56:59,000
Did ya?

1454
00:56:59,100 --> 00:57:00,500
OK, sorry.

1455
00:57:00,600 --> 00:57:01,700
Sorry Kash.

1456
00:57:01,800 --> 00:57:05,167
I love your shop and your
daughter is a stunner.

1457
00:57:05,267 --> 00:57:06,400
[church bell rings]

1458
00:57:06,500 --> 00:57:09,067
PRIEST: Will you, Carl
Francis Gallagher,

1459
00:57:09,167 --> 00:57:12,700
take Meena Karib to be
your lawful, wedded wife?

1460
00:57:12,800 --> 00:57:17,000
Would you love
her, cherish her--

1461
00:57:17,100 --> 00:57:20,133
[music playing]

1462
00:57:23,600 --> 00:57:25,467
Frank!

1463
00:57:25,567 --> 00:57:27,833
It's Nigel.

1464
00:57:27,933 --> 00:57:30,400
Little Nigel.

1465
00:57:30,500 --> 00:57:31,433
FRANK: Is it?

1466
00:57:31,533 --> 00:57:33,267
Where the bloody
hell have you been?

1467
00:57:33,367 --> 00:57:34,033
FRANK: Oh.

1468
00:57:34,133 --> 00:57:36,333
A couple of riots.

1469
00:57:36,433 --> 00:57:38,500
Pub.

1470
00:57:38,600 --> 00:57:40,600
[music continues]

1471
00:57:40,700 --> 00:57:41,500
Well.

1472
00:57:50,933 --> 00:57:53,000
Where's Nigel come from?

1473
00:57:53,100 --> 00:57:55,400
SHEILA: Little Nigel.

1474
00:57:55,500 --> 00:57:57,867
Little Delia.

1475
00:57:57,967 --> 00:57:58,900
What is it?

1476
00:57:59,000 --> 00:57:59,867
UMI: It's OK, Frank.

1477
00:57:59,967 --> 00:58:00,767
It is a boy!

1478
00:58:05,000 --> 00:58:07,267
FIONA: What now?

1479
00:58:07,367 --> 00:58:08,833
What's happening to her?

1480
00:58:08,933 --> 00:58:10,033
UMI: I don't know.

1481
00:58:10,133 --> 00:58:12,600
Sheila, the baby is here.

1482
00:58:12,700 --> 00:58:14,700
It's twins!

1483
00:58:14,800 --> 00:58:16,433
Mind your backs.

1484
00:58:16,533 --> 00:58:17,633
Here comes Delia!

1485
00:58:20,367 --> 00:58:22,800
It's a surprise for Frank.

1486
00:58:22,900 --> 00:58:23,800
Where are you, Frank?

1487
00:58:23,900 --> 00:58:26,367
It's a surprise.

1488
00:58:26,467 --> 00:58:29,733
[sirens wail]

1489
00:58:29,833 --> 00:58:32,700
[helicopter blades turning]

1490
00:58:32,800 --> 00:58:35,667
[distant church bells]

1491
00:58:38,733 --> 00:58:41,633
[truck engine passing]

1492
00:58:41,733 --> 00:58:44,600
[distant church bells]

1493
00:58:48,633 --> 00:58:50,133
SOLDIER: Right, next.

1494
00:58:58,367 --> 00:58:59,967
All right, you're
not shoving that down

1495
00:59:00,067 --> 00:59:02,100
my 'til I know what's in it?

1496
00:59:02,200 --> 00:59:03,567
COMMANDER: It's just
an antibiotic coagulant

1497
00:59:03,667 --> 00:59:05,967
in a zinc-phosphate-based
emulsion.

1498
00:59:06,067 --> 00:59:07,033
Oh, right you are.

1499
00:59:19,700 --> 00:59:22,767
Actually, I think I've
had this one before.

1500
00:59:32,800 --> 00:59:35,333
[music playing]

1501
00:59:35,433 --> 00:59:36,100
They're here.

1502
00:59:36,200 --> 00:59:37,067
Yeah, Fiona's here.

1503
00:59:37,167 --> 00:59:39,067
Quick, quick, quick.

1504
00:59:39,167 --> 00:59:40,633
ALL: Hooray!

1505
00:59:40,733 --> 00:59:42,033
[clapping]

1506
00:59:42,133 --> 00:59:43,167
I know that's mine.

1507
00:59:43,267 --> 00:59:45,600
I know that's mine.

1508
00:59:45,700 --> 00:59:47,067
[babies crying]

1509
00:59:47,167 --> 00:59:49,533
You've done well there, Frank.

1510
00:59:49,633 --> 00:59:50,933
Get fucked.

1511
00:59:51,033 --> 00:59:53,367
Tosser.

1512
00:59:53,467 --> 00:59:56,367
[babies crying]

1513
01:00:04,867 --> 01:00:07,333
ALL: Yeah!

1514
01:00:07,433 --> 01:00:08,333
LIP: Whoa!

1515
01:00:12,233 --> 01:00:13,133
All right, who's next?

1516
01:00:13,233 --> 01:00:14,133
LIP: Come on, then.

1517
01:00:14,233 --> 01:00:16,700
Come on, Carl.

1518
01:00:16,800 --> 01:00:17,667
Whoa!

1519
01:00:17,767 --> 01:00:18,600
Cheers, Fiona!

1520
01:00:23,467 --> 01:00:25,767
LIP: Open it up.

1521
01:00:25,867 --> 01:00:27,333
What have you got?

1522
01:00:27,433 --> 01:00:28,700
Whoa!

1523
01:00:28,800 --> 01:00:32,333
A microscope!

1524
01:00:32,433 --> 01:00:33,267
Ah!

1525
01:00:33,367 --> 01:00:37,600
[laughing] An ass
and face towel.

1526
01:00:40,667 --> 01:00:43,500
FIONA: Ass face!

1527
01:00:43,600 --> 01:00:44,833
STEVE: Quick, Ian.

1528
01:00:44,933 --> 01:00:46,167
LIP: Go on.

1529
01:00:46,267 --> 01:00:48,067
CARL: Yeah, who's that off, Ian?

1530
01:00:48,167 --> 01:00:50,133
IAN: It's from Kash and Yvonne.

1531
01:00:53,700 --> 01:00:54,533
No way.

1532
01:00:54,633 --> 01:00:55,633
Look at you Ian.

1533
01:00:55,733 --> 01:00:57,233
FIONA: What are you
employee of the month?

1534
01:00:57,333 --> 01:00:59,000
IAN: What are you on about?

1535
01:01:03,000 --> 01:01:05,367
STEVE: Hope you like it.

1536
01:01:05,467 --> 01:01:07,433
FIONA: Wow.

1537
01:01:07,533 --> 01:01:08,367
Wow.

1538
01:01:15,300 --> 01:01:16,767
[everyone cheers]

1539
01:01:16,867 --> 01:01:19,333
LIP: That was a good one, that.

1540
01:01:19,433 --> 01:01:22,167
Whoa!

1541
01:01:22,267 --> 01:01:23,333
Happy Christmas!

1542
01:01:28,833 --> 01:01:30,733
SHEILA: Happy Christmas!

1543
01:01:30,833 --> 01:01:32,167
What did you get?

1544
01:01:32,267 --> 01:01:33,733
Let's have a look
at what you got.

1545
01:01:33,833 --> 01:01:37,167
Hey, happy Christmas.

1546
01:01:37,267 --> 01:01:38,267
Did you see Santa?

1547
01:01:51,100 --> 01:01:54,167
[footsteps]

1548
01:01:55,067 --> 01:01:57,467
FIONA: It's open.

1549
01:01:57,567 --> 01:01:58,533
Can I share your mirror?

1550
01:01:58,633 --> 01:02:00,067
They're really bugging me.

1551
01:02:02,867 --> 01:02:04,067
Thanks for the present.

1552
01:02:04,167 --> 01:02:05,933
It suits ya.

1553
01:02:06,033 --> 01:02:07,200
Did you like yours?

1554
01:02:07,300 --> 01:02:08,100
Yeah.

1555
01:02:10,567 --> 01:02:14,233
Look, I know why you never
enjoy this time of year.

1556
01:02:16,967 --> 01:02:22,333
'Cause-- Christmas
is when mum left.

1557
01:02:22,433 --> 01:02:24,300
So?

1558
01:02:24,400 --> 01:02:26,300
Not that?

1559
01:02:26,400 --> 01:02:28,533
No.

1560
01:02:28,633 --> 01:02:33,833
'Cause Christmas is when
dad first got sent down?

1561
01:02:33,933 --> 01:02:35,500
No.

1562
01:02:35,600 --> 01:02:39,267
'Cause it's when you get
expelled from St. Ellen's?

1563
01:02:39,367 --> 01:02:40,833
Big deal.

1564
01:02:40,933 --> 01:02:44,133
What's with the face?

1565
01:02:44,233 --> 01:02:47,567
I've started my periods.

1566
01:02:47,667 --> 01:02:48,967
When?

1567
01:02:49,067 --> 01:02:50,967
Last night.

1568
01:02:51,067 --> 01:02:52,167
You're too young.

1569
01:02:52,267 --> 01:02:55,133
I'm not the first in our year.

1570
01:02:55,233 --> 01:02:57,867
Why didn't you come to me?

1571
01:02:57,967 --> 01:02:59,567
I told Yvonne in the shop.

1572
01:02:59,667 --> 01:03:00,567
Rather than me?

1573
01:03:00,667 --> 01:03:03,400
No, 'cause, I had to buy--

1574
01:03:03,500 --> 01:03:04,967
stuff.

1575
01:03:05,067 --> 01:03:07,367
YVONNE: Never apologize
for the anger, Debbie.

1576
01:03:07,467 --> 01:03:09,800
Feel it in your womb
and learn to use it,

1577
01:03:09,900 --> 01:03:11,733
otherwise you'll
go bleeding nuts.

1578
01:03:11,833 --> 01:03:12,700
[door bell rings]

1579
01:03:12,800 --> 01:03:14,067
You, out!

1580
01:03:14,167 --> 01:03:15,633
You're barred!

1581
01:03:15,733 --> 01:03:18,033
And anyway, you were busy.

1582
01:03:22,267 --> 01:03:25,067
I am never too busy to
talk to you, sweetheart.

1583
01:03:25,167 --> 01:03:26,400
You can come to
me with anything.

1584
01:03:26,500 --> 01:03:27,300
You know that.

1585
01:03:31,367 --> 01:03:34,300
I'm way too old
for that microscope.

1586
01:03:34,400 --> 01:03:37,767
If I can persuade Carl it's
worth double what you paid,

1587
01:03:37,867 --> 01:03:40,733
would you be offended if
I had his leather jacket?

1588
01:03:40,833 --> 01:03:41,667
No.

1589
01:03:41,767 --> 01:03:42,800
Yeah!

1590
01:03:42,900 --> 01:03:44,267
He loves that jacket.

1591
01:03:44,367 --> 01:03:48,800
Yeah, but not if I told
him he looks a bit gay.

1592
01:03:48,900 --> 01:03:50,600
OK.

1593
01:03:50,700 --> 01:03:51,967
Don't wipe the floor with him.

1594
01:03:52,067 --> 01:03:53,367
Of course not.

1595
01:03:53,467 --> 01:03:55,967
I'll make him think
it's his idea.

1596
01:03:56,067 --> 01:03:58,933
Oh.

1597
01:03:59,033 --> 01:04:01,933
[footsteps]

1598
01:04:02,033 --> 01:04:05,100
[soft music playing]

1599
01:04:16,600 --> 01:04:17,900
VERONICA: Oi!

1600
01:04:18,000 --> 01:04:20,067
I asked you to keep
an eye on the veg,

1601
01:04:20,167 --> 01:04:21,567
not plan the next
bleedin' bonfire.

1602
01:04:21,667 --> 01:04:23,333
All right, bin.

1603
01:04:23,433 --> 01:04:24,467
Bi-nah.

1604
01:04:24,567 --> 01:04:26,500
Now, just listen to
the sounds, mate.

1605
01:04:26,600 --> 01:04:27,400
All right, here we go.

1606
01:04:27,500 --> 01:04:30,533
Ba in na.

1607
01:04:30,633 --> 01:04:31,567
Banana.

1608
01:04:31,667 --> 01:04:33,333
Jesus, no!

1609
01:04:33,433 --> 01:04:35,267
Just listen to the sounds, Kev.

1610
01:04:35,367 --> 01:04:38,133
See, what did I say, your
head won't help, will it?

1611
01:04:38,233 --> 01:04:40,800
Just makes me feel
like a complete prick.

1612
01:04:40,900 --> 01:04:42,067
I'm really sorry, Kev.

1613
01:04:42,167 --> 01:04:44,000
Just-- let's just start
from the beginning.

1614
01:04:44,100 --> 01:04:46,600
KEV: I'm going around ours
to get some more beers.

1615
01:04:46,700 --> 01:04:48,133
Fucking hell!

1616
01:04:48,233 --> 01:04:49,433
Will someone please make sure
I'm not sitting next to him

1617
01:04:49,533 --> 01:04:50,467
at the table?

1618
01:04:50,567 --> 01:04:51,800
I tried giving him
lessons, young twat.

1619
01:04:51,900 --> 01:04:53,400
DEBBIE: Me now, I
gave him an hour,

1620
01:04:53,500 --> 01:04:56,700
then I said me best friend
had died so I had to go home.

1621
01:04:56,800 --> 01:05:03,600
Lip, Ian-- give us a hand.

1622
01:05:03,700 --> 01:05:04,567
That's Delia.

1623
01:05:04,667 --> 01:05:05,567
That's Nigel.

1624
01:05:09,067 --> 01:05:10,133
IAN: Hi, what do you need?

1625
01:05:16,067 --> 01:05:17,467
Trestle.

1626
01:05:17,567 --> 01:05:19,233
Go and fetch a
trestle table from ours,

1627
01:05:19,333 --> 01:05:21,600
then nip around for
Veronica's chairs.

1628
01:05:21,700 --> 01:05:22,567
LIP: How many are we?

1629
01:05:22,667 --> 01:05:23,700
Too many.

1630
01:05:23,800 --> 01:05:24,700
12.

1631
01:05:24,800 --> 01:05:25,667
IAN: 13.

1632
01:05:25,767 --> 01:05:27,233
Dad's not hungry.

1633
01:05:27,333 --> 01:05:29,633
Yeah, but you'll be joining us
at the table, won't you, Frank?

1634
01:05:29,733 --> 01:05:31,200
Get fucked.

1635
01:05:31,300 --> 01:05:31,933
No!

1636
01:05:32,033 --> 01:05:33,800
I'm not having that.

1637
01:05:33,900 --> 01:05:36,567
Proud, new father.

1638
01:05:36,667 --> 01:05:37,867
Get Frank a chair.

1639
01:05:37,967 --> 01:05:39,967
Center table.

1640
01:05:40,067 --> 01:05:43,567
Where you belong, darling. d

1641
01:05:51,733 --> 01:05:53,133
Debbie.

1642
01:05:53,233 --> 01:05:56,333
Go and see if you can find
dad something decent to wear.

1643
01:05:56,433 --> 01:05:58,933
LIP AND IAN: Not from my room.

1644
01:05:59,033 --> 01:05:59,900
Come on.

1645
01:06:00,000 --> 01:06:02,300
You're filthy.

1646
01:06:02,400 --> 01:06:05,867
[acoustic guitar music playing]

1647
01:06:05,967 --> 01:06:08,433
For what we are
about to receive,

1648
01:06:08,533 --> 01:06:11,133
may the Lord our God
make is us a little bit

1649
01:06:11,233 --> 01:06:14,333
more thankful than we
might otherwise have been.

1650
01:06:14,433 --> 01:06:19,000
May he grant us wealth,
and peace, and happiness--

1651
01:06:19,100 --> 01:06:20,733
and wealth.

1652
01:06:20,833 --> 01:06:25,800
Plus thanks for
Pepe's resurrection.

1653
01:06:25,900 --> 01:06:28,400
PRIEST: In the name of the
Father, Son and Holy Spirit.

1654
01:06:28,500 --> 01:06:29,533
Amen.

1655
01:06:29,633 --> 01:06:31,600
We have entrusted our
dearly beloved brother

1656
01:06:31,700 --> 01:06:32,767
to God's merciful keeping.

1657
01:06:32,867 --> 01:06:33,900
And we now commit
his body to the--

1658
01:06:34,000 --> 01:06:34,967
[dog barks]

1659
01:06:35,067 --> 01:06:36,567
What?

1660
01:06:36,667 --> 01:06:40,000
CAROL: You heard me, oh
Lord, if my hour of need,

1661
01:06:40,100 --> 01:06:44,033
crying like a baby for my baby.

1662
01:06:44,133 --> 01:06:46,467
FRANK: Fuck's sake.

1663
01:06:46,567 --> 01:06:47,900
We're not religion

1664
01:06:48,000 --> 01:06:51,033
I'm not finished.

1665
01:06:51,133 --> 01:06:55,267
CAROL: No wonder you're
all plagued by misfortune.

1666
01:06:55,367 --> 01:07:00,167
Thanks all the more for bringing
me and Marty back together.

1667
01:07:00,267 --> 01:07:04,067
For uniting my babies
at this special time

1668
01:07:04,167 --> 01:07:06,900
with these special people.

1669
01:07:07,000 --> 01:07:09,767
If you do your best
for peace and wealth,

1670
01:07:09,867 --> 01:07:11,800
I'll work my socks off for you.

1671
01:07:11,900 --> 01:07:12,700
Amen.

1672
01:07:12,800 --> 01:07:13,867
ALL: Amen.

1673
01:07:13,967 --> 01:07:15,867
FIONA: Come on
everybody, let's eat!

1674
01:07:15,967 --> 01:07:17,833
Happy Christmas!

1675
01:07:17,933 --> 01:07:20,800
[all cheering]

1676
01:07:20,900 --> 01:07:23,767
[laughter]

1677
01:07:23,867 --> 01:07:27,133
[music playing]

1678
01:07:27,233 --> 01:07:30,667
[chatter and laughter]

1679
01:07:30,767 --> 01:07:34,233
[music continues]

1680
01:07:44,467 --> 01:07:47,133
[laughter]

1681
01:07:53,900 --> 01:07:56,333
STEVE: Oh here we go.

1682
01:07:56,433 --> 01:07:59,667
No, Frank.

1683
01:07:59,767 --> 01:08:01,567
Oh, for fuck's sake, Frank.

1684
01:08:01,667 --> 01:08:02,467
What?

1685
01:08:02,567 --> 01:08:04,067
I'll use your drink.

1686
01:08:04,167 --> 01:08:06,300
Hey dad, I think
you've had enough.

1687
01:08:06,400 --> 01:08:10,633
Oh, no truer words said.

1688
01:08:10,733 --> 01:08:12,033
Too right.

1689
01:08:12,133 --> 01:08:15,167
'Cause care as soon
as the doctor is open,

1690
01:08:15,267 --> 01:08:17,567
I am having the snip.

1691
01:08:17,667 --> 01:08:18,967
No, Frank!

1692
01:08:19,067 --> 01:08:23,533
FRANK: Oh, fucking yes!

1693
01:08:23,633 --> 01:08:27,100
[music continues]

1694
01:09:05,700 --> 01:09:08,733
FRANK: Talk about taking
it up the shitter.

1695
01:09:08,833 --> 01:09:11,333
Eight kids on half a wage.

1696
01:09:11,433 --> 01:09:14,533
What's that If it's not
a total fucking ambush.

1697
01:09:14,633 --> 01:09:15,900
Fucked.

1698
01:09:16,000 --> 01:09:18,367
[electricity crackling]

1699
01:09:19,267 --> 01:09:21,500
Oh, come on, Frank.

1700
01:09:21,600 --> 01:09:22,567
Starter for ten.

1701
01:09:22,667 --> 01:09:24,000
No conferring.

1702
01:09:24,100 --> 01:09:25,767
Queens, can you take it?

1703
01:09:25,867 --> 01:09:33,333
Was David Carradine all about
if you learn fuck all, eh?

1704
01:09:33,433 --> 01:09:35,600
Where's your
grasshopper now, Frank?

1705
01:09:35,700 --> 01:09:38,733
Snip, snip, fucking snip!

1706
01:09:38,833 --> 01:09:41,633
[electricity crackling]

1707
01:09:43,100 --> 01:09:44,567
WOMAN: Ooh.

1708
01:09:44,667 --> 01:09:46,333
Oh.

1709
01:09:46,433 --> 01:09:51,567
Frozen chips, triple-A
batteries, drinking chocolate--

1710
01:09:55,567 --> 01:09:58,733
[filmrise jingle]