1 00:00:04,667 --> 00:00:07,167 Look at me right. 2 00:00:07,267 --> 00:00:09,033 And look at the Queen. 3 00:00:09,133 --> 00:00:11,367 I was never a fan until it occurred to me, 4 00:00:11,467 --> 00:00:13,400 how much me Mom have in common. 5 00:00:13,500 --> 00:00:16,133 Bringing up kiddies you can't remember the names of. 6 00:00:16,233 --> 00:00:18,067 And no, she's not a single parent. 7 00:00:18,167 --> 00:00:19,533 But she might as well be. 8 00:00:19,633 --> 00:00:22,067 Plus, the pair of us, we stuck to our guns, 9 00:00:22,167 --> 00:00:23,933 her literally sometimes. 10 00:00:24,033 --> 00:00:26,233 And flagshipped a dying breed. 11 00:00:26,333 --> 00:00:28,533 Admired and despised equally. 12 00:00:28,633 --> 00:00:30,933 Not for never lifting a finger, no. 13 00:00:31,033 --> 00:00:33,900 For setting examples through extremity. 14 00:00:34,000 --> 00:00:36,667 And whether you're a big wig on her end or a big wig on mine, 15 00:00:36,767 --> 00:00:39,033 you still got all your dickheads in the middle to deal with, 16 00:00:39,133 --> 00:00:41,000 snip-snip-snipping at your benefits. 17 00:00:41,100 --> 00:00:43,700 I mean, she can't not be looking at me and thinking, 18 00:00:43,800 --> 00:00:45,833 what's your secret, Frank? 19 00:00:45,933 --> 00:00:48,467 I got shot on my kids' yonks back. 20 00:00:48,567 --> 00:00:50,367 Whereas she yet to do the back of a single one. 21 00:00:50,467 --> 00:00:51,400 Fine. 22 00:00:51,500 --> 00:00:53,200 I've had to get out of bed on occasion 23 00:00:53,300 --> 00:00:55,667 to make ends meet, whereas she-- she's done 24 00:00:55,767 --> 00:00:59,300 the whole thing from a chair. 25 00:00:59,400 --> 00:01:00,833 Oh, and a drink for the lady. 26 00:01:00,933 --> 00:01:02,467 Oh, sure there's perks. 27 00:01:02,567 --> 00:01:03,500 but look at her lot. 28 00:01:03,600 --> 00:01:05,967 Brian May, prancing about on her roof. 29 00:01:06,067 --> 00:01:08,467 Now, look at my lot. 30 00:01:08,567 --> 00:01:12,000 We know how to throw a proper fucking party. 31 00:01:20,667 --> 00:01:22,500 DOMINIC (VOICEOVER): The more I think about it, 32 00:01:22,600 --> 00:01:24,500 the more I realize that pretty much everyone's 33 00:01:24,600 --> 00:01:26,333 got a secret identity. 34 00:01:29,200 --> 00:01:31,700 And I'm not, you know, meaning like Batman or Superman. 35 00:01:31,800 --> 00:01:34,567 Although, when I was 10, I did put my pants on my head 36 00:01:34,667 --> 00:01:37,667 and run around pretending to be a superhero, the Catholic 37 00:01:37,767 --> 00:01:38,867 Avenger. 38 00:01:38,967 --> 00:01:40,567 Exorcised the next door neighbor's cat. 39 00:01:40,667 --> 00:01:41,967 Worked as well. 40 00:01:42,067 --> 00:01:43,167 No. 41 00:01:43,267 --> 00:01:45,167 I mean the secret identity being you, 42 00:01:45,267 --> 00:01:48,433 the real you, the one behind all that bluster and front. 43 00:01:51,433 --> 00:01:53,333 Like, the woman who pretended she didn't need 44 00:01:53,433 --> 00:01:55,467 love, but found it closer to home 45 00:01:55,567 --> 00:01:59,100 than she could have ever imagined. 46 00:01:59,200 --> 00:02:01,133 Or the boy who's doing his best to be a loving 47 00:02:01,233 --> 00:02:02,267 husband and good father. 48 00:02:05,100 --> 00:02:07,067 Those good looks and easy smile distracting you 49 00:02:07,167 --> 00:02:08,333 from the stench of blood and death 50 00:02:08,433 --> 00:02:09,800 that came with his family name. 51 00:02:12,567 --> 00:02:15,267 Or the friendly local janitor, always got a smile 52 00:02:15,367 --> 00:02:16,833 and wink for the kiddies. 53 00:02:16,933 --> 00:02:18,800 Some of them say they want to be like him when they grow up. 54 00:02:26,333 --> 00:02:28,633 Or the man who thought he was happy enough, drinking, 55 00:02:28,733 --> 00:02:32,233 womanizing, getting by, until he realized, he'd 56 00:02:32,333 --> 00:02:34,000 never known what happiness was at all. 57 00:02:36,800 --> 00:02:38,233 [knocking] 58 00:02:40,600 --> 00:02:41,400 Coming. 59 00:02:41,500 --> 00:02:42,667 Oh, shit. 60 00:02:42,767 --> 00:02:43,667 Coming. 61 00:02:43,767 --> 00:02:44,933 Package for Gloria Meak. 62 00:02:45,033 --> 00:02:46,200 - She doesn't live here. - Oh. 63 00:02:46,300 --> 00:02:47,867 I mean, she does. Sorry. 64 00:02:47,967 --> 00:02:48,867 She does. 65 00:02:48,967 --> 00:02:49,833 She;s just not here right now. 66 00:02:49,933 --> 00:02:51,933 Oh, pay no attention to him. 67 00:02:52,033 --> 00:02:53,600 Mince for brains til he has his first cuppa. 68 00:02:53,700 --> 00:02:54,867 Yeah, my wife's the same. 69 00:02:54,967 --> 00:02:56,333 Oh, no, no. We're not married. 70 00:02:56,433 --> 00:02:57,100 No. 71 00:02:57,200 --> 00:02:59,700 We're brother and sister. 72 00:02:59,800 --> 00:03:00,967 What? 73 00:03:01,067 --> 00:03:03,033 It's not weird is it, us living together? 74 00:03:03,133 --> 00:03:05,167 Especially not in this economic climate. 75 00:03:05,267 --> 00:03:07,233 I'm a priest anyway, you know, a man of the cloth. 76 00:03:07,333 --> 00:03:09,633 I told you, mince. 77 00:03:23,067 --> 00:03:23,967 What's with you? 78 00:03:24,067 --> 00:03:25,133 Nothing. 79 00:03:43,333 --> 00:03:47,300 As you all know, tomorrow is a Red Letter day. 80 00:03:47,400 --> 00:03:49,867 The school inspector calls. 81 00:03:49,967 --> 00:03:55,867 So big smiles, friendly faces, and we'll all get through it. 82 00:03:55,967 --> 00:03:59,800 And there is one other thing. 83 00:03:59,900 --> 00:04:05,167 In light of recent solicitors' letters that I've received, 84 00:04:05,267 --> 00:04:10,933 it seems that our exclusion of Adam Wiggins 85 00:04:11,033 --> 00:04:13,133 may not have been entirely legal. 86 00:04:13,233 --> 00:04:14,667 You better be joking. 87 00:04:14,767 --> 00:04:16,200 [interposing voices] 88 00:04:23,967 --> 00:04:25,767 Russell, that little fucker comes back, 89 00:04:25,867 --> 00:04:27,667 you'll have a walk out on your hands. 90 00:04:27,767 --> 00:04:29,033 You can't do that. 91 00:04:29,133 --> 00:04:30,600 We've got an inspection. 92 00:04:30,700 --> 00:04:34,833 Seems to me, you're doing it all wrong, punishing the lad, 93 00:04:34,933 --> 00:04:37,467 excluding him, not going to work. 94 00:04:37,567 --> 00:04:41,200 Now, what you need is a nice little frilly 95 00:04:41,300 --> 00:04:43,167 pink dress and a pair of heels. 96 00:04:43,267 --> 00:04:45,267 Dress up this Adam like a little girl. 97 00:04:45,367 --> 00:04:48,167 Two or three days tottering around the corridors having 98 00:04:48,267 --> 00:04:50,467 the shit ripped out of him by all and sundry, 99 00:04:50,567 --> 00:04:53,067 he'll be humble as pie. 100 00:04:53,167 --> 00:04:54,100 It's all right. 101 00:04:54,200 --> 00:04:57,267 You can thank me later. 102 00:04:57,367 --> 00:05:02,133 Just to remind you, you are PTA, not actual staff. 103 00:05:02,233 --> 00:05:04,333 I was just helping. 104 00:05:04,433 --> 00:05:06,900 I've got experience with these things. 105 00:05:07,000 --> 00:05:08,133 Kids of me own. 106 00:05:08,233 --> 00:05:10,433 I understand the whole world of education 107 00:05:10,533 --> 00:05:13,733 must seem fascinating and new to you. 108 00:05:13,833 --> 00:05:14,967 What's that mean? 109 00:05:15,067 --> 00:05:17,800 How old were you when you left school? 110 00:05:17,900 --> 00:05:19,100 Exactly. 111 00:05:19,200 --> 00:05:20,967 But this is not a free for all. 112 00:05:21,067 --> 00:05:22,500 And I'm not blind. 113 00:05:22,600 --> 00:05:25,467 I'm well aware of you slithering your tentacles into places 114 00:05:25,567 --> 00:05:26,267 they're not welcome-- 115 00:05:26,367 --> 00:05:28,333 You better watch your tone. 116 00:05:28,433 --> 00:05:31,300 You better watch out you don't overstep the mark. 117 00:05:31,400 --> 00:05:36,033 Because one little word from me and you're gone. 118 00:05:36,133 --> 00:05:37,100 Gone with the wind. 119 00:05:50,100 --> 00:05:51,933 He's not going to call. 120 00:05:52,033 --> 00:05:54,333 He might. 121 00:05:54,433 --> 00:05:55,900 Look, I know things got a little bit out of hand, 122 00:05:56,000 --> 00:06:00,533 but you know, now me and Kassi have had a time to cool down. 123 00:06:00,633 --> 00:06:02,567 Jamie, he popped in here for a drink 124 00:06:02,667 --> 00:06:04,567 and you tried to beat the shit out of him. 125 00:06:04,667 --> 00:06:07,700 He's hardly going to be throwing lunch dates and friend 126 00:06:07,800 --> 00:06:09,200 requests in your direction. 127 00:06:12,700 --> 00:06:14,167 He's not answering my calls. 128 00:06:14,267 --> 00:06:17,733 Because he knows your number. 129 00:06:17,833 --> 00:06:19,200 But he doesn't know mine. 130 00:06:22,100 --> 00:06:23,567 [phone ringing] 131 00:06:28,600 --> 00:06:29,467 KASSI (PHONE): Hello? 132 00:06:33,433 --> 00:06:34,567 It's me, Jamie. 133 00:06:37,800 --> 00:06:38,967 Don't hang up. 134 00:06:39,067 --> 00:06:41,433 Hey, there you are, Mimi. 135 00:06:41,533 --> 00:06:44,333 How's it hanging? 136 00:06:44,433 --> 00:06:49,333 Hey, fucking-- this place doesn't clean itself, you know. 137 00:06:49,433 --> 00:06:51,400 What are we doing, Frank? 138 00:06:51,500 --> 00:06:52,133 Look at us. 139 00:06:52,233 --> 00:06:54,667 We look like dicks. 140 00:06:54,767 --> 00:06:56,567 I don't. 141 00:06:56,667 --> 00:06:58,200 Hey, come on. 142 00:06:58,300 --> 00:06:59,933 You shouldn't let them get you down, kid. 143 00:07:00,033 --> 00:07:01,833 You're the big, strong woman. 144 00:07:01,933 --> 00:07:02,833 No, I'm not. 145 00:07:02,933 --> 00:07:04,467 Yes, you are. 146 00:07:04,567 --> 00:07:07,100 Come on. 147 00:07:07,200 --> 00:07:10,533 In fact, I'm going to close the book on this place, 148 00:07:10,633 --> 00:07:12,567 take them them for everything I can, 149 00:07:12,667 --> 00:07:15,000 show those fuckers what over stepping 150 00:07:15,100 --> 00:07:16,967 the line really looks like. 151 00:07:17,067 --> 00:07:18,933 Yeah, good for you. 152 00:07:19,033 --> 00:07:20,167 Hey, you know, I-- 153 00:07:20,267 --> 00:07:24,033 I've been very impressed by that-- 154 00:07:24,133 --> 00:07:27,867 you know, that mushroom industry that you've got going. 155 00:07:27,967 --> 00:07:29,600 You're a trailblazer. 156 00:07:29,700 --> 00:07:33,100 You know, Amelia Earhart, Marie Curie, a Pocahontas-- 157 00:07:33,200 --> 00:07:35,900 I haven't got Hovis stamped on my ass. 158 00:07:36,000 --> 00:07:37,633 You can stop buttering me up, Frank. 159 00:07:37,733 --> 00:07:39,500 What you want? 160 00:07:39,600 --> 00:07:44,033 Well, seeing that you're doing very well with this mushroom 161 00:07:44,133 --> 00:07:47,933 thing, you know, maybe tip a few caps this way 162 00:07:48,033 --> 00:07:49,533 to your old friend and neighbor. 163 00:07:53,767 --> 00:07:55,500 Fill your boots, Frank. 164 00:08:01,333 --> 00:08:05,767 Enjoy it while it lasts, because I'm getting the gold mine. 165 00:08:05,867 --> 00:08:08,733 And these are getting the shaft. 166 00:08:08,833 --> 00:08:11,733 Laters, Frank. 167 00:08:11,833 --> 00:08:12,700 Yeah. 168 00:08:12,800 --> 00:08:13,633 Laters. 169 00:08:17,000 --> 00:08:20,900 But you get on all right, as family, when you finally got 170 00:08:21,000 --> 00:08:22,200 to spend some time together. 171 00:08:22,300 --> 00:08:25,633 Which was lovely, til she opened her mouth. 172 00:08:25,733 --> 00:08:27,633 He was so drunk he thought I was twins. 173 00:08:27,733 --> 00:08:29,367 Oh, come on, Jamie. You're a class act. 174 00:08:29,467 --> 00:08:30,600 I mean, what's not to like, eh? 175 00:08:30,700 --> 00:08:32,200 Black guy, couple of bruises. 176 00:08:32,300 --> 00:08:34,567 Jamie, he's agreed to meet you again. 177 00:08:34,667 --> 00:08:36,133 He's coming in for a drink. 178 00:08:36,233 --> 00:08:37,300 Don't over think it. 179 00:08:37,400 --> 00:08:39,067 You know what you should try doing? 180 00:08:39,167 --> 00:08:40,167 Mom, it's all right. 181 00:08:40,267 --> 00:08:41,367 I was just saying-- 182 00:08:41,467 --> 00:08:43,933 I don't want this opened up to the floor. 183 00:08:44,033 --> 00:08:45,133 I just wanted to hear from a couple 184 00:08:45,233 --> 00:08:46,300 of folk who'd been there. 185 00:08:50,500 --> 00:08:52,533 Right, listen up. 186 00:08:52,633 --> 00:08:54,000 My brother's coming in here tonight. 187 00:08:54,100 --> 00:08:55,167 I'm already here, you div. 188 00:08:55,267 --> 00:08:56,933 My other brother. 189 00:08:57,033 --> 00:09:00,500 And I want to show him that this place isn't a fucking cesspool. 190 00:09:00,600 --> 00:09:05,467 So no fighting, no drugs, no pissing, and no puking. 191 00:09:05,567 --> 00:09:06,400 You got that? 192 00:09:06,500 --> 00:09:08,133 It's you he needs to worry about. 193 00:09:17,600 --> 00:09:19,867 No, it's good to laugh. 194 00:09:19,967 --> 00:09:21,700 A pub full of happy people joking about, you 195 00:09:21,800 --> 00:09:23,267 got the right idea, John. 196 00:09:23,367 --> 00:09:26,067 So go on, laugh again. 197 00:09:26,167 --> 00:09:28,833 I want to hear you, a big old fucking chuckle. 198 00:09:28,933 --> 00:09:33,333 [chuckling] 199 00:09:33,433 --> 00:09:35,900 You can do better than that. 200 00:09:36,000 --> 00:09:38,733 All of you. 201 00:09:38,833 --> 00:09:41,067 Did I say stop? 202 00:09:41,167 --> 00:09:44,767 Laugh it up, you fucking fuzzballs. 203 00:09:44,867 --> 00:09:48,333 All together now. 204 00:09:48,433 --> 00:09:50,767 [laughing] 205 00:09:50,867 --> 00:09:51,733 That's better. 206 00:09:56,700 --> 00:09:59,267 Computer room, at the back, first corridor. 207 00:09:59,367 --> 00:10:01,733 They've got a brand new server, whatever the fuck that is. 208 00:10:01,833 --> 00:10:06,333 So go in, after midnight, rip it out, sell it on. 209 00:10:06,433 --> 00:10:07,500 Right? 210 00:10:07,600 --> 00:10:08,567 You got masks? 211 00:10:08,667 --> 00:10:10,900 Don't want any of this coming back to me. 212 00:10:11,000 --> 00:10:12,900 Right, then. 213 00:10:13,000 --> 00:10:14,367 And don't smash the place up. 214 00:10:14,467 --> 00:10:16,500 Some of the kids have worked quite hard on the projects 215 00:10:16,600 --> 00:10:19,067 and-- 216 00:10:19,167 --> 00:10:20,167 just keep it clean. 217 00:10:31,400 --> 00:10:33,467 That way. 218 00:10:33,567 --> 00:10:36,933 Are you sure about us being here? 219 00:10:37,033 --> 00:10:38,700 Oh, yeah, because being at home's 220 00:10:38,800 --> 00:10:42,800 so much better with Aidan tramping around with his tag on 221 00:10:42,900 --> 00:10:47,067 and little one mewling and whining all the fucking time. 222 00:10:47,167 --> 00:10:50,133 It's just we always hated school. 223 00:10:50,233 --> 00:10:52,167 Worst years of our lives. 224 00:10:52,267 --> 00:10:56,033 I promise you, after this evening's over, 225 00:10:56,133 --> 00:11:00,100 you'll think of school in a whole different light. 226 00:11:00,200 --> 00:11:02,500 I'm not pissing on you, Frank. 227 00:11:02,600 --> 00:11:03,900 What? 228 00:11:04,000 --> 00:11:06,333 Eh, what's pissing got to do with it? 229 00:11:06,433 --> 00:11:08,500 Just whenever you start talking like this, 230 00:11:08,600 --> 00:11:10,567 usually ends with me pissing on you. 231 00:11:10,667 --> 00:11:14,367 That's not strictly true, but let's not rule anything out. 232 00:11:14,467 --> 00:11:16,733 You know, what happens in school, stays in school. 233 00:11:22,233 --> 00:11:24,067 He's not coming. 234 00:11:24,167 --> 00:11:26,033 Maybe it's just running late. 235 00:11:26,133 --> 00:11:27,100 Maybe it's for the best. 236 00:11:29,833 --> 00:11:32,433 It's not like you could've shared life stories, is it? 237 00:11:32,533 --> 00:11:33,767 I'll tell you what. 238 00:11:33,867 --> 00:11:35,733 Let's talk about the time I was banged up or the time I 239 00:11:35,833 --> 00:11:37,600 offed three fellas. 240 00:11:37,700 --> 00:11:39,433 Or maybe the time when I-- 241 00:11:39,533 --> 00:11:41,033 I dug up the corpse of some guy's dad, 242 00:11:41,133 --> 00:11:42,533 because he had his sticky fingers on my missus. 243 00:11:42,633 --> 00:11:45,433 Shane, let's play shut the fuck up. 244 00:11:45,533 --> 00:11:46,767 You go first. 245 00:11:46,867 --> 00:11:48,767 Just saying. 246 00:11:48,867 --> 00:11:50,033 I'm going to clear up. 247 00:12:09,667 --> 00:12:10,567 Hey. 248 00:12:13,033 --> 00:12:13,833 Hey, man. 249 00:12:13,933 --> 00:12:14,867 Easy, easy. 250 00:12:14,967 --> 00:12:17,433 Sorry, mate. 251 00:12:17,533 --> 00:12:20,167 Karen told me you were out here shifting crates. 252 00:12:20,267 --> 00:12:21,733 I know it's late-- 253 00:12:21,833 --> 00:12:23,100 We're closing up, but we can still get a couple of beers-- 254 00:12:23,200 --> 00:12:24,367 How about tomorrow? 255 00:12:24,467 --> 00:12:25,133 Day out. 256 00:12:25,233 --> 00:12:26,333 Banley Manor? 257 00:12:26,433 --> 00:12:27,800 Tam's off school for a few days. 258 00:12:27,900 --> 00:12:28,900 I have to look after him anyway. 259 00:12:29,000 --> 00:12:31,333 Why Banley? 260 00:12:31,433 --> 00:12:32,633 Is this to do with my dad? 261 00:12:35,300 --> 00:12:35,967 Yes. 262 00:12:36,067 --> 00:12:37,133 Yes, it is. 263 00:12:37,233 --> 00:12:43,400 That's where his ashes were scattered. 264 00:12:43,500 --> 00:12:44,300 Tomorrow then? 265 00:12:49,033 --> 00:12:50,300 I've got a taxi waiting. 266 00:12:50,400 --> 00:12:51,233 Tomorrow. 267 00:13:04,600 --> 00:13:06,067 They're gone. 268 00:13:13,267 --> 00:13:15,267 - Frank-- - Almost done. 269 00:13:15,367 --> 00:13:17,767 Don't know about this. 270 00:13:17,867 --> 00:13:19,200 Makes me look like a prossie. 271 00:13:19,300 --> 00:13:21,000 No. 272 00:13:21,100 --> 00:13:23,667 You look like a painted lady. 273 00:13:30,100 --> 00:13:31,600 Don't that look like Siobhan? 274 00:13:31,700 --> 00:13:32,800 Fuck, it does. 275 00:13:32,900 --> 00:13:34,667 Got the cornrows and everything. 276 00:13:34,767 --> 00:13:35,933 Talented little bastards. 277 00:13:36,033 --> 00:13:38,667 They're not talented. 278 00:13:38,767 --> 00:13:41,400 This-- this is talent. 279 00:13:41,500 --> 00:13:44,233 Rembrandt would be spinning in his tomb. 280 00:13:44,333 --> 00:13:47,733 This stuff, this is rubbish. 281 00:13:47,833 --> 00:13:49,933 Just bollocks, isn't it? 282 00:13:50,033 --> 00:13:53,067 Fingers like penises. 283 00:13:53,167 --> 00:13:54,200 Smiley faces. 284 00:13:57,900 --> 00:14:03,333 Yeah, that's kids for you. they see things differently. 285 00:14:03,433 --> 00:14:05,267 Blue sky. 286 00:14:05,367 --> 00:14:07,767 Big old Mr. Sunshine. 287 00:14:07,867 --> 00:14:09,067 [laughter] 288 00:14:11,100 --> 00:14:14,867 Everything's beautiful. 289 00:14:14,967 --> 00:14:19,400 Everything's just perfect. 290 00:14:19,500 --> 00:14:21,767 Frankie. 291 00:14:21,867 --> 00:14:23,400 Frankie. 292 00:14:23,500 --> 00:14:24,300 Oh. 293 00:14:29,733 --> 00:14:30,600 Frank. 294 00:14:30,700 --> 00:14:31,700 Are you looking at me? 295 00:14:31,800 --> 00:14:33,700 Wait, this is-- this is important. 296 00:14:33,800 --> 00:14:35,633 Here I am, Frank. 297 00:14:35,733 --> 00:14:37,367 Frank. 298 00:14:37,467 --> 00:14:41,767 This is fucking brilliant. 299 00:14:41,867 --> 00:14:43,800 It's like a moment. 300 00:14:48,367 --> 00:14:49,233 No. 301 00:14:49,333 --> 00:14:50,000 No. 302 00:14:50,100 --> 00:14:51,833 Don't change. 303 00:14:51,933 --> 00:14:54,067 Stay the same. 304 00:14:54,167 --> 00:14:56,633 Don't grow old, because your fucking 305 00:14:56,733 --> 00:15:01,200 kids just fucking up and away. 306 00:15:01,300 --> 00:15:02,200 Frank. 307 00:15:10,300 --> 00:15:12,600 Frank. 308 00:15:12,700 --> 00:15:15,600 You looking at me now, Frank? 309 00:15:15,700 --> 00:15:16,600 Have you finished? 310 00:15:16,700 --> 00:15:17,600 No. 311 00:15:17,700 --> 00:15:20,167 I'm not fucking finished. 312 00:15:25,700 --> 00:15:26,600 Frank. 313 00:15:26,700 --> 00:15:27,567 FRANK: Stop it. 314 00:15:52,300 --> 00:15:54,233 You fucking leech. 315 00:15:54,333 --> 00:15:57,667 Iraq not enough for you? 316 00:15:57,767 --> 00:15:59,800 I am not fucking finished. 317 00:16:11,767 --> 00:16:12,633 No. 318 00:16:12,733 --> 00:16:13,633 No. 319 00:16:13,733 --> 00:16:14,633 No. 320 00:16:14,733 --> 00:16:15,533 No. 321 00:16:24,600 --> 00:16:26,067 [bell ringing] 322 00:16:34,500 --> 00:16:35,567 All set? 323 00:16:35,667 --> 00:16:36,733 Yeah, think so. 324 00:16:39,567 --> 00:16:42,333 Packed lunch, just some sandwiches. 325 00:16:42,433 --> 00:16:44,933 You ever been to Banley Manor before? 326 00:16:45,033 --> 00:16:45,867 Oh, god. 327 00:16:45,967 --> 00:16:47,100 It's boring. 328 00:16:47,200 --> 00:16:49,200 I went there years ago on a school trip. 329 00:16:49,300 --> 00:16:50,333 Connor might enjoy it though. 330 00:16:50,433 --> 00:16:52,633 Don't think you have to come. 331 00:16:52,733 --> 00:16:54,100 I can do this. 332 00:16:54,200 --> 00:16:57,133 Like I said, I mean, boring for me. 333 00:16:57,233 --> 00:16:58,867 But for Connor though-- 334 00:16:58,967 --> 00:17:00,233 Yeah, OK. 335 00:17:00,333 --> 00:17:03,233 But I'm not sharing my sandwiches. 336 00:17:03,333 --> 00:17:05,733 I'll just go and get some stuff together. 337 00:17:05,833 --> 00:17:10,900 He's bringing his kid too, my nephew I suppose. 338 00:17:11,000 --> 00:17:12,600 Have you got him something? 339 00:17:12,700 --> 00:17:13,767 What? 340 00:17:13,867 --> 00:17:14,800 You think I should get him a present? 341 00:17:14,900 --> 00:17:16,100 I don't know. 342 00:17:16,200 --> 00:17:17,533 It's polite. 343 00:17:17,633 --> 00:17:19,167 I mean, these middle classes-- oh, that'll be great, 344 00:17:19,267 --> 00:17:20,367 showing up empty handed. 345 00:17:20,467 --> 00:17:21,300 He'll think I'm a right fucking loser. 346 00:17:21,400 --> 00:17:22,167 We're meeting him at 11. 347 00:17:22,267 --> 00:17:23,500 You haven't got time. 348 00:17:32,667 --> 00:17:35,100 Hey, what's going on. 349 00:17:35,200 --> 00:17:37,967 Well, it's Christmas, sir, Christmas morning. 350 00:17:38,067 --> 00:17:39,300 Seriously? 351 00:17:39,400 --> 00:17:42,700 No, assembly in the hall, isn't it? 352 00:17:42,800 --> 00:17:44,700 Coo-ee, Frank. 353 00:17:44,800 --> 00:17:46,267 [interposing voices] 354 00:17:52,767 --> 00:17:54,100 Oh, eh up. 355 00:17:54,200 --> 00:17:55,667 Eh up. Eh up. 356 00:17:55,767 --> 00:17:56,667 Jannie coming through. 357 00:17:56,767 --> 00:17:58,233 Jannie coming through. 358 00:18:04,733 --> 00:18:06,067 Frank, I'm stuck. 359 00:18:06,167 --> 00:18:07,000 Just jump. 360 00:18:07,100 --> 00:18:08,467 I can't. 361 00:18:08,567 --> 00:18:10,867 I've got impetigo. 362 00:18:10,967 --> 00:18:12,400 What? 363 00:18:12,500 --> 00:18:14,333 Look, the place is gonna be crawling with kids and teachers 364 00:18:14,433 --> 00:18:15,100 in a minute. 365 00:18:15,200 --> 00:18:16,533 I'll catch you. 366 00:18:16,633 --> 00:18:17,767 Trust me. 367 00:18:17,867 --> 00:18:18,767 Trust me. 368 00:18:18,867 --> 00:18:20,333 [bell ringing] 369 00:18:22,833 --> 00:18:25,100 Ow. 370 00:18:25,200 --> 00:18:26,667 Oh, fucking hell. 371 00:18:26,767 --> 00:18:30,067 Oh, Jesus. 372 00:18:30,167 --> 00:18:32,033 Come on. 373 00:18:32,133 --> 00:18:33,600 Up and at them. 374 00:18:33,700 --> 00:18:35,400 You said you'd catch me. 375 00:18:35,500 --> 00:18:38,933 I've got bruises, more bruises. 376 00:18:39,033 --> 00:18:40,500 Fucking hell, Frank. 377 00:18:40,600 --> 00:18:42,067 You throw like a girl. 378 00:18:45,400 --> 00:18:48,567 We haven't got time for this. 379 00:18:48,667 --> 00:18:49,933 [bell ringing] 380 00:18:50,033 --> 00:18:51,067 Oh, shit. 381 00:19:02,167 --> 00:19:03,467 You got any Frisbees? 382 00:19:03,567 --> 00:19:04,900 We don't sell that kind of stuff here. 383 00:19:05,000 --> 00:19:06,067 You know that. 384 00:19:06,167 --> 00:19:07,267 Have you got anything similar then? 385 00:19:07,367 --> 00:19:08,000 Jaime, I don't deal drugs, all right? 386 00:19:08,100 --> 00:19:09,000 Bet he does. 387 00:19:09,100 --> 00:19:10,000 This place has to be a front. 388 00:19:10,100 --> 00:19:10,867 It's not a bloody code word. 389 00:19:10,967 --> 00:19:11,967 It's a Frisbee. 390 00:19:12,067 --> 00:19:13,433 It's an object you throw and catch. 391 00:19:13,533 --> 00:19:14,867 Oh, right. 392 00:19:14,967 --> 00:19:16,300 Frisbee. 393 00:19:16,400 --> 00:19:17,400 No. 394 00:19:17,500 --> 00:19:18,567 I also don't sell that kind of thing here. 395 00:19:18,667 --> 00:19:19,733 Here. 396 00:19:19,833 --> 00:19:20,833 I'm in a rush. I can't be late. 397 00:19:20,933 --> 00:19:21,767 So how much? 398 00:19:21,867 --> 00:19:23,200 Just take it, man. 399 00:19:28,967 --> 00:19:29,767 Biscay. 400 00:19:29,867 --> 00:19:33,567 Get East or Northwest? 401 00:19:33,667 --> 00:19:35,900 Four or five. 402 00:19:36,000 --> 00:19:38,833 Slight or moderate. 403 00:19:38,933 --> 00:19:40,800 Mainly fair. 404 00:19:40,900 --> 00:19:42,067 Good. 405 00:19:42,167 --> 00:19:44,633 Occasionally, very poor. 406 00:19:44,733 --> 00:19:47,833 Trafalgar, variable southerly. 407 00:19:47,933 --> 00:19:48,767 Frank. 408 00:19:48,867 --> 00:19:51,100 Three or four. 409 00:19:51,200 --> 00:19:53,433 Occasionally, five. 410 00:19:53,533 --> 00:19:55,600 Slight or moderate. 411 00:19:55,700 --> 00:19:58,733 Fair, good. 412 00:19:58,833 --> 00:20:03,233 Well, that concludes today's shipping forecast. 413 00:20:03,333 --> 00:20:07,933 I'd like to welcome someone back into the fold. 414 00:20:08,033 --> 00:20:14,033 And I'm sure that once you've heard what Adam Wiggins has 415 00:20:14,133 --> 00:20:17,700 to say, I'm sure that you'll agree 416 00:20:17,800 --> 00:20:19,900 he deserves a second chance. 417 00:20:20,000 --> 00:20:21,000 Adam. 418 00:20:43,400 --> 00:20:45,700 No way. 419 00:20:45,800 --> 00:20:47,267 [interposing voices] 420 00:21:06,100 --> 00:21:09,000 Just great. 421 00:21:09,100 --> 00:21:10,333 Just great. 422 00:21:10,433 --> 00:21:11,100 Go on. 423 00:21:11,200 --> 00:21:12,600 Fight the system. 424 00:21:12,700 --> 00:21:13,533 Solidaritnost. 425 00:21:27,433 --> 00:21:29,200 Shouldn't you be in school? 426 00:21:29,300 --> 00:21:30,567 There was a walk out. 427 00:21:30,667 --> 00:21:33,600 There's only like three teachers and 40 kids left. 428 00:21:33,700 --> 00:21:34,533 When? 429 00:21:34,633 --> 00:21:36,367 In assembly. 430 00:21:36,467 --> 00:21:38,533 Heard them say they'll probably shut the school down now. 431 00:21:42,067 --> 00:21:43,600 Hang on a minute, love. 432 00:21:43,700 --> 00:21:45,067 What are you doing, miss? 433 00:21:45,167 --> 00:21:46,667 Protecting my investment. 434 00:21:50,567 --> 00:21:53,233 So how are things at-- 435 00:21:56,533 --> 00:21:57,333 Inspector HQ. 436 00:21:57,433 --> 00:21:58,100 Right. 437 00:21:58,200 --> 00:21:59,867 Let us begin. 438 00:21:59,967 --> 00:22:01,200 English. 439 00:22:01,300 --> 00:22:03,833 Well, how about geography instead? 440 00:22:03,933 --> 00:22:06,367 Mr. Farman's class is fascinating. 441 00:22:06,467 --> 00:22:07,500 Oh, would you like to meet-- 442 00:22:07,600 --> 00:22:09,467 Year four English. 443 00:22:09,567 --> 00:22:11,633 Actually, I think the year four teacher might be off. 444 00:22:11,733 --> 00:22:14,200 Well, then you'll have a substitute teacher, won't you? 445 00:22:14,300 --> 00:22:16,533 Or are you so incompetent you can't even manage that? 446 00:22:16,633 --> 00:22:19,500 Wait, look, there's something I need to tell you. 447 00:22:19,600 --> 00:22:22,833 Of course, if I was to tell you the next story we were 448 00:22:22,933 --> 00:22:27,533 looking at featured murder, paranoia, insanity, revenge, 449 00:22:27,633 --> 00:22:30,133 and ghosts, you'd probably think I was talking 450 00:22:30,233 --> 00:22:32,600 about an X-rated oeuvre of Mr. Tarantino or Mr. 451 00:22:32,700 --> 00:22:34,800 Stallone, but no. 452 00:22:34,900 --> 00:22:36,300 It's called "Hamlet." 453 00:22:36,400 --> 00:22:38,533 And it's by a bright young gun named William Shakespeare. 454 00:22:38,633 --> 00:22:39,467 Anybody know him? 455 00:22:44,400 --> 00:22:47,567 Ah, gentlemen, please, take a seat. 456 00:22:50,900 --> 00:22:52,200 OK. 457 00:22:52,300 --> 00:22:53,133 OK. 458 00:22:53,233 --> 00:22:55,400 So where was I. "Hamlet, Hamlet." 459 00:22:59,300 --> 00:23:01,133 Warms a very sickness in my heart 460 00:23:01,233 --> 00:23:03,900 that I shall live and tell him to his teeth. 461 00:23:04,000 --> 00:23:05,500 Thus diest thou. 462 00:23:09,267 --> 00:23:10,400 Slightly carried away there. 463 00:23:10,500 --> 00:23:12,200 But everybody open your books. 464 00:23:12,300 --> 00:23:13,600 Turn to page one. 465 00:23:13,700 --> 00:23:16,633 Hang on to your hats, because it's "Hamlet" time. 466 00:23:16,733 --> 00:23:20,467 Right now, your career is bent over the table, 467 00:23:20,567 --> 00:23:24,533 trousers down, cheeks splayed, about to get the ass fucking 468 00:23:24,633 --> 00:23:27,233 to end all ass fuckings. 469 00:23:27,333 --> 00:23:29,867 You're too old to retrain for anything else. 470 00:23:29,967 --> 00:23:32,100 And no other school will touch you 471 00:23:32,200 --> 00:23:34,900 with the proverbial dirty barge pole. 472 00:23:35,000 --> 00:23:37,667 So I'm your only hope. 473 00:23:37,767 --> 00:23:42,733 Now, I've called in favors from friends, good friends, 474 00:23:42,833 --> 00:23:46,667 to bail you out of your own mess. 475 00:23:46,767 --> 00:23:49,933 I just hope I haven't overstepped the mark. 476 00:23:50,033 --> 00:23:52,000 Is everything all right, Mr. Banbury? 477 00:23:52,100 --> 00:23:53,733 Everything's fine. 478 00:23:53,833 --> 00:23:56,000 Then, pay attention. 479 00:23:56,100 --> 00:23:59,267 You might learn something. 480 00:23:59,367 --> 00:24:00,467 My liege. 481 00:24:00,567 --> 00:24:06,667 Art, chemistry, physical education, mathematics. 482 00:24:06,767 --> 00:24:12,500 Oh, and there was recently a big investment in a school server. 483 00:24:12,600 --> 00:24:14,967 I would very much like to see that up and running. 484 00:24:15,067 --> 00:24:17,367 The computer room at the back, brand 485 00:24:17,467 --> 00:24:20,300 new server worth thousands. 486 00:24:20,400 --> 00:24:21,433 Rip it out. 487 00:24:21,533 --> 00:24:24,767 Sell it on. 488 00:24:24,867 --> 00:24:25,767 No problem at all. 489 00:24:30,733 --> 00:24:32,900 I need you to get that server back to me 490 00:24:33,000 --> 00:24:39,733 ASA-fucking-P. I don't care if you've got football tonight. 491 00:24:39,833 --> 00:24:43,067 Billy, do you want to spend the rest of your married life 492 00:24:43,167 --> 00:24:46,367 sleeping on the couch? 493 00:24:46,467 --> 00:24:47,300 Right. 494 00:24:47,400 --> 00:24:49,733 Thank you. 495 00:24:49,833 --> 00:24:51,733 You, here, now. 496 00:24:55,400 --> 00:24:57,133 Bet you're happy with yourself. 497 00:24:57,233 --> 00:24:58,933 School's in chaos. 498 00:24:59,033 --> 00:25:01,000 Most of the teachers have buggered off. 499 00:25:01,100 --> 00:25:02,500 Come on. 500 00:25:02,600 --> 00:25:04,500 Let's see if you're still smiling when I'm done with you. 501 00:25:07,200 --> 00:25:10,333 You might have half the school shitting themselves 502 00:25:10,433 --> 00:25:11,900 every time you look round. 503 00:25:12,000 --> 00:25:13,500 Might have the teachers on the run. 504 00:25:13,600 --> 00:25:18,433 But I'll give you this, you do scrub up pretty well. 505 00:25:18,533 --> 00:25:22,467 Now, you totter along to the kitchen to help out, 506 00:25:22,567 --> 00:25:24,633 for all those lovely dinner ladies 507 00:25:24,733 --> 00:25:26,767 walked out when you walked in. 508 00:25:26,867 --> 00:25:31,200 And eh, son, make sure that food's de-fucking-liscious. 509 00:25:31,300 --> 00:25:33,233 Michelin star, or you'll be walking 510 00:25:33,333 --> 00:25:35,167 around in my knickers and bra. 511 00:25:40,467 --> 00:25:47,667 So I guess you come here a lot, to visit Dad's dashes. 512 00:25:47,767 --> 00:25:48,767 Yeah, yeah. 513 00:25:48,867 --> 00:25:52,667 We make the trip every week or so. 514 00:25:52,767 --> 00:25:53,667 It's boring. 515 00:25:53,767 --> 00:25:55,133 It doesn't have to be boring. 516 00:25:55,233 --> 00:25:56,500 And Jamie's brought you something. 517 00:25:56,600 --> 00:25:57,733 Give it to him. - What? 518 00:25:57,833 --> 00:25:58,633 This? 519 00:26:00,433 --> 00:26:01,400 No, no. 520 00:26:01,500 --> 00:26:05,300 I didn't bring this to play with it's-- 521 00:26:05,400 --> 00:26:07,000 it's some kid's birthday on our street. 522 00:26:07,100 --> 00:26:10,267 He's mentally deficient. 523 00:26:10,367 --> 00:26:12,567 That's really good of you, mate. 524 00:26:28,600 --> 00:26:32,100 These are a little basic, aren't they? 525 00:26:32,200 --> 00:26:33,700 I mean, at this level, they really should 526 00:26:33,800 --> 00:26:34,667 be up to a higher standard. 527 00:26:38,267 --> 00:26:43,300 Yeah, but in order to draw like the child, 528 00:26:43,400 --> 00:26:46,767 one must think like the child, yeah? 529 00:26:46,867 --> 00:26:49,967 They are children. 530 00:26:50,067 --> 00:26:54,933 You are a man who understands art. 531 00:26:55,033 --> 00:26:59,467 Well, I-- well, I do dabble. 532 00:26:59,567 --> 00:27:00,400 Yeah. 533 00:27:00,500 --> 00:27:01,767 [phone ringing] 534 00:27:04,200 --> 00:27:06,300 FRANK: You do dabble. 535 00:27:06,400 --> 00:27:08,300 Billy, give me some good news. 536 00:27:08,400 --> 00:27:10,500 They've sold the server on already. 537 00:27:10,600 --> 00:27:12,233 The problem is it's to another school. 538 00:27:12,333 --> 00:27:13,567 Look, just delay your man. 539 00:27:13,667 --> 00:27:14,500 I'm on it. 540 00:27:16,767 --> 00:27:17,600 Right. 541 00:27:17,700 --> 00:27:18,500 I'll wait here. 542 00:27:18,600 --> 00:27:19,767 It's your wife. 543 00:27:19,867 --> 00:27:21,400 Well, I can't just walk into a strange school, can I? 544 00:27:21,500 --> 00:27:22,800 Everyone will think I'm a paedo. 545 00:27:22,900 --> 00:27:24,367 Then, you can't hang around the school gates either. 546 00:27:24,467 --> 00:27:26,067 You'll look even more paedo-tastic. 547 00:27:26,167 --> 00:27:27,133 So grow some. 548 00:27:37,333 --> 00:27:38,067 Right. 549 00:27:38,167 --> 00:27:39,000 Which-- which one's the server? 550 00:27:39,100 --> 00:27:40,200 That big thing there. 551 00:27:43,100 --> 00:27:47,900 You know, you should've unplugged it first. 552 00:27:48,000 --> 00:27:50,267 Has everyone just run off and left you? 553 00:27:50,367 --> 00:27:51,800 Animals, man, the lot of them. 554 00:27:51,900 --> 00:27:52,700 Billy. 555 00:27:52,800 --> 00:27:53,833 It's wrong. 556 00:27:53,933 --> 00:27:54,767 The wheels. 557 00:27:57,000 --> 00:27:58,433 We're going to hell. We're going to hell. 558 00:27:58,533 --> 00:27:59,200 We're going to hell. 559 00:27:59,300 --> 00:28:00,400 We're going to hell. 560 00:28:00,500 --> 00:28:03,633 [MUSIC - THE VACCINES, "NORGAARD"] 561 00:28:04,633 --> 00:28:05,967 Great Danes cheekbones. 562 00:28:06,067 --> 00:28:06,933 Teenage hormanes. 563 00:28:07,033 --> 00:28:08,533 Young complexion. 564 00:28:08,633 --> 00:28:09,933 Non-physical affection. 565 00:28:10,033 --> 00:28:11,500 You're a godsend. 566 00:28:11,600 --> 00:28:12,900 Do you want a boyfriend. 567 00:28:13,000 --> 00:28:15,467 Crazy, Crazy, easy tiger. 568 00:28:15,567 --> 00:28:16,867 Her mind's made up. 569 00:28:16,967 --> 00:28:18,300 She don't want to go steady. 570 00:28:18,400 --> 00:28:20,867 She's only 17, so she's probably not ready. 571 00:28:20,967 --> 00:28:23,667 A-M-A-N-D-A Norgaard. 572 00:28:23,767 --> 00:28:26,800 I saw you on a cover on Cross Bay Boulevard. 573 00:28:26,900 --> 00:28:28,400 [whistle blowing] 574 00:28:29,433 --> 00:28:32,200 Smaller tits and skinny framework. 575 00:28:32,300 --> 00:28:34,600 Tall sharp hips, and you're all in the same work. 576 00:28:34,700 --> 00:28:37,867 Give me the sweet talk, walking down the catwalk. 577 00:28:37,967 --> 00:28:38,767 Go in there. 578 00:28:38,867 --> 00:28:40,200 Go in there. 579 00:28:40,300 --> 00:28:41,200 Her mind's made up. 580 00:28:41,300 --> 00:28:42,600 She don't want go steady. 581 00:28:42,700 --> 00:28:45,633 She's only 17, so she's probably not ready. 582 00:28:45,733 --> 00:28:48,300 A-M-A-N-D-A Norgaard. 583 00:28:48,400 --> 00:28:51,800 I saw you on the cover on Cross Bay Boulevard. 584 00:28:55,367 --> 00:28:56,167 Go. 585 00:28:56,267 --> 00:28:57,100 Go. 586 00:29:05,533 --> 00:29:12,767 So Dad, our dad, where'd you scatter the ashes? 587 00:29:20,733 --> 00:29:22,000 Over the flowerbed? 588 00:29:22,100 --> 00:29:23,900 It's what he wanted. 589 00:29:24,000 --> 00:29:26,067 He used to sit here on the bench. 590 00:29:26,167 --> 00:29:28,233 He loved it here. 591 00:29:28,333 --> 00:29:30,733 Suppose I should go and say something. 592 00:29:50,500 --> 00:29:52,100 I have no fucking idea what I'm doing here. 593 00:29:55,700 --> 00:29:57,733 I mean you're a pile of ashes in a flower bed. 594 00:29:57,833 --> 00:29:59,633 You obviously can't hear me. 595 00:29:59,733 --> 00:30:02,533 Are you exclusive? 596 00:30:02,633 --> 00:30:04,200 You and the big lab? 597 00:30:04,300 --> 00:30:07,300 Because I ain't got a girlfriend at the moment 598 00:30:07,400 --> 00:30:13,000 and I can be very discreet. 599 00:30:13,100 --> 00:30:14,900 Blah, blah, blah. 600 00:30:15,000 --> 00:30:17,067 Talking to a fucking flower bed. 601 00:30:17,167 --> 00:30:19,233 Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. 602 00:30:23,000 --> 00:30:26,200 So yeah. 603 00:30:26,300 --> 00:30:28,267 I hope he would've been proud of me. 604 00:30:28,367 --> 00:30:31,867 It's unlikely, but I hope so. 605 00:30:31,967 --> 00:30:33,433 Nice one, mate. 606 00:30:43,867 --> 00:30:45,933 Late for school? 607 00:30:46,033 --> 00:30:47,800 There's a punishment for that. 608 00:30:47,900 --> 00:30:50,467 I was kind of hoping there would be. 609 00:30:53,367 --> 00:30:56,933 Just pay the fucking bills on time, you alcoholic twat bag. 610 00:30:57,033 --> 00:30:58,033 All right, Mims? - No. 611 00:30:58,133 --> 00:30:59,267 Not all right. 612 00:30:59,367 --> 00:31:01,067 Does anyone know anything about computers? 613 00:31:01,167 --> 00:31:02,333 Yeah. I know a little bit. 614 00:31:02,433 --> 00:31:04,533 Good, because we've got about three minutes 615 00:31:04,633 --> 00:31:07,133 to get this server up and running before the inspector 616 00:31:07,233 --> 00:31:08,533 gets to the computer room. 617 00:31:08,633 --> 00:31:11,800 And I've no fucking idea what a server actually does. 618 00:31:11,900 --> 00:31:14,500 Come on. 619 00:31:14,600 --> 00:31:15,400 No. 620 00:31:15,500 --> 00:31:16,333 No. 621 00:31:16,433 --> 00:31:18,167 Other cable. 622 00:31:18,267 --> 00:31:20,267 You don't think she suspected anything, do you? 623 00:31:20,367 --> 00:31:21,633 What? 624 00:31:21,733 --> 00:31:22,933 Apart from you being an who can't pay your bills on time? 625 00:31:23,033 --> 00:31:24,300 No. 626 00:31:24,400 --> 00:31:25,800 Second time this week we've almost been caught. 627 00:31:25,900 --> 00:31:27,567 You don't think we're one of those couple who, you know-- 628 00:31:27,667 --> 00:31:29,367 Get off on danger? 629 00:31:29,467 --> 00:31:31,333 No. 630 00:31:31,433 --> 00:31:34,733 In fact, it makes me even more frustrated. 631 00:31:34,833 --> 00:31:35,800 I want to do normal things. 632 00:31:35,900 --> 00:31:37,400 Why don't we then? 633 00:31:37,500 --> 00:31:40,633 Tonight, Grand Hotel, meal, get drunk. 634 00:31:40,733 --> 00:31:43,900 It's weird isn't it? 635 00:31:44,000 --> 00:31:46,600 It just feels right. 636 00:31:46,700 --> 00:31:48,400 Yeah. 637 00:31:48,500 --> 00:31:51,500 Does that. 638 00:31:51,600 --> 00:31:52,567 Everything good? 639 00:31:52,667 --> 00:31:53,833 Yeah. DOMINIC: Yeah. 640 00:31:53,933 --> 00:31:55,833 Yeah. Never been better. 641 00:31:55,933 --> 00:31:56,733 OK. 642 00:31:56,833 --> 00:31:58,700 So we have lift off. 643 00:32:05,067 --> 00:32:07,467 Oh. 644 00:32:07,567 --> 00:32:08,367 Yeah. 645 00:32:14,533 --> 00:32:15,167 Yeah. 646 00:32:15,267 --> 00:32:16,767 So who can spell proper? 647 00:32:16,867 --> 00:32:18,567 Katie. 648 00:32:18,667 --> 00:32:21,833 Just another hour, and we're in the clear. 649 00:32:21,933 --> 00:32:23,233 So what is this? 650 00:32:23,333 --> 00:32:24,333 Go on. 651 00:32:24,433 --> 00:32:25,867 You're really into all this, aren't you? 652 00:32:25,967 --> 00:32:29,533 The school, the way the kids look up to you, the teachers. 653 00:32:29,633 --> 00:32:32,267 It's called protecting your investment. 654 00:32:32,367 --> 00:32:34,200 Are you sure that's all it is. 655 00:32:34,300 --> 00:32:35,533 Of course I'm fucking sure. 656 00:32:35,633 --> 00:32:37,633 These corridors are paved with gold. 657 00:32:37,733 --> 00:32:39,800 And let's all going straight into my pocket. 658 00:32:39,900 --> 00:32:41,100 All right. 659 00:32:41,200 --> 00:32:42,633 If anyone's too into this. 660 00:32:42,733 --> 00:32:43,567 It's your Dom. 661 00:32:43,667 --> 00:32:45,000 Yeah. 662 00:32:45,100 --> 00:32:47,633 A real showman that one. 663 00:32:47,733 --> 00:32:50,400 He just loves pretending to be somebody else. 664 00:33:00,000 --> 00:33:02,267 Is there a union we can join or something? 665 00:33:02,367 --> 00:33:05,767 Lil, you do realize we're not real teachers, right? 666 00:33:05,867 --> 00:33:08,067 Oh, you might not be a real teacher. 667 00:33:20,600 --> 00:33:22,567 Pizza. 668 00:33:22,667 --> 00:33:23,900 Really? 669 00:33:24,000 --> 00:33:26,133 Well, it covers four of-- 670 00:33:26,233 --> 00:33:28,500 Stop babbling. 671 00:33:28,600 --> 00:33:30,000 You're getting a pass. 672 00:33:30,100 --> 00:33:32,067 A weak one, with notes in the margin. 673 00:33:32,167 --> 00:33:33,500 But it's still a pass. 674 00:33:33,600 --> 00:33:35,133 I've always tried to maintain the highest standards-- 675 00:33:35,233 --> 00:33:38,633 The less you speak, the better it'll be for everybody. 676 00:34:13,500 --> 00:34:16,400 Oh, shit. 677 00:34:16,500 --> 00:34:17,800 Get out. 678 00:34:17,900 --> 00:34:20,333 Get out. 679 00:34:20,433 --> 00:34:21,333 [alarm] 680 00:34:21,433 --> 00:34:22,733 [screaming] 681 00:34:43,133 --> 00:34:45,267 We shouldn't be exposed to these kinds of things. 682 00:34:45,367 --> 00:34:48,000 We're fucking courtesans, ladies of pleasure. 683 00:34:48,100 --> 00:34:49,567 Fire. 684 00:34:49,667 --> 00:34:50,633 Fire. Coming through. 685 00:34:50,733 --> 00:34:51,567 Fire. 686 00:34:57,033 --> 00:34:59,033 What was that? 687 00:34:59,133 --> 00:35:01,633 Al-Qaeda or the fucking paddies starting up? 688 00:35:16,567 --> 00:35:21,033 Let Hercules himself do what he may. 689 00:35:21,133 --> 00:35:24,667 The cat will mew and dog will have his day. 690 00:35:27,367 --> 00:35:30,167 That is from "Hamlet." 691 00:35:30,267 --> 00:35:34,333 And it means you are all in a hell of a lot of trouble. 692 00:35:43,733 --> 00:35:45,267 I feel sorry for you. 693 00:35:45,367 --> 00:35:48,933 You went to all that effort to set up those microwaves, 694 00:35:49,033 --> 00:35:50,800 the cans in them. 695 00:35:50,900 --> 00:35:52,133 Big boom. 696 00:35:52,233 --> 00:35:55,700 And you didn't even scratch me. 697 00:35:55,800 --> 00:35:58,000 I mean, that's pathetic. 698 00:36:00,433 --> 00:36:02,600 There are kids your age in Sierra 699 00:36:02,700 --> 00:36:08,700 Leone with AK-47s and twice the balls you'll ever have. 700 00:36:08,800 --> 00:36:14,000 You know, when I first heard about you, I thought maybe 701 00:36:14,100 --> 00:36:17,000 here's a lad who's gonna show me something new, 702 00:36:17,100 --> 00:36:18,967 something interesting. 703 00:36:19,067 --> 00:36:22,800 Maybe he'll even surprise me. 704 00:36:22,900 --> 00:36:25,233 But you can't, can you, Adam? 705 00:36:25,333 --> 00:36:29,233 Because you're mediocre. 706 00:36:29,333 --> 00:36:30,600 And you always will be. 707 00:36:39,533 --> 00:36:43,533 So how does it feel, now that you've spoken to Dad? 708 00:36:43,633 --> 00:36:44,500 Yeah, great. 709 00:36:44,600 --> 00:36:49,600 I-- you know, a weight off my mind. 710 00:36:49,700 --> 00:36:51,933 All right, I can't do this Kass. 711 00:36:52,033 --> 00:36:54,567 I didn't feel a thing. 712 00:36:54,667 --> 00:36:55,500 I'm a bad person. 713 00:36:55,600 --> 00:36:57,000 This was a mistake. 714 00:36:57,100 --> 00:36:57,900 Jamie-- 715 00:36:58,000 --> 00:36:59,600 I've done time in jail. 716 00:36:59,700 --> 00:37:01,733 I've been involved in shit that would turn your shit white. 717 00:37:01,833 --> 00:37:03,500 You're clever. You're driven. 718 00:37:03,600 --> 00:37:05,567 You've got this great kid who's all sorted. 719 00:37:05,667 --> 00:37:07,033 I'm just a fuck up. 720 00:37:07,133 --> 00:37:07,933 It's not funny. 721 00:37:08,033 --> 00:37:08,867 It's-- 722 00:37:08,967 --> 00:37:13,367 Jamie, I lied to you. 723 00:37:13,467 --> 00:37:15,133 Dad's ashes weren't scattered here. 724 00:37:17,900 --> 00:37:20,000 Then, where are they scattered then? 725 00:37:20,100 --> 00:37:21,100 Don't know. 726 00:37:21,200 --> 00:37:23,100 I don't even know where they are. 727 00:37:23,200 --> 00:37:25,633 Left them in the back of a taxi when I was doing a runner. 728 00:37:25,733 --> 00:37:26,867 Why? 729 00:37:26,967 --> 00:37:28,567 Well, because it was eight quid fifty. 730 00:37:28,667 --> 00:37:29,367 And I only had a fiver. 731 00:37:29,467 --> 00:37:30,867 And you know, they always-- 732 00:37:30,967 --> 00:37:33,667 Why did you tell me they we're here, acting all serious? 733 00:37:37,100 --> 00:37:39,400 Because I thought that's what you wanted. 734 00:37:39,500 --> 00:37:43,100 I'm only here because I thought that's what you wanted. 735 00:37:43,200 --> 00:37:47,033 Mate, I'm a fuck up too. 736 00:37:47,133 --> 00:37:49,200 And not just losing Dad's ashes. 737 00:37:49,300 --> 00:37:51,233 I mean, I've been bankrupt. 738 00:37:51,333 --> 00:37:56,067 And Tam, well-- well, they gave him a little holiday 739 00:37:56,167 --> 00:37:58,967 from school for sending photos of his cock 740 00:37:59,067 --> 00:38:02,400 to the English teacher. 741 00:38:02,500 --> 00:38:04,600 Looks like he's just shown it to my missus. 742 00:38:13,600 --> 00:38:18,067 The point is fucking up happens. 743 00:38:18,167 --> 00:38:19,700 And I figured, two brothers walking 744 00:38:19,800 --> 00:38:22,567 around acting all serious, trying to make the other one 745 00:38:22,667 --> 00:38:27,767 feel better, well, it can't be all bad. 746 00:38:27,867 --> 00:38:31,567 Right 747 00:38:31,667 --> 00:38:33,067 You really are a fuck-up. 748 00:38:38,967 --> 00:38:42,433 [children shouting] 749 00:38:51,333 --> 00:38:55,533 Listen, you can't blame Banbury for this. 750 00:38:55,633 --> 00:38:56,800 He let a kid come back. 751 00:38:56,900 --> 00:38:59,200 Teacher's walked out. 752 00:38:59,300 --> 00:39:02,867 Look, I'm going to be nice and save you 753 00:39:02,967 --> 00:39:04,833 the trouble of a beautiful speech, 754 00:39:04,933 --> 00:39:11,267 some wonderful oration to melt my heart and stay my pen. 755 00:39:11,367 --> 00:39:13,500 It's not going to happen. 756 00:39:13,600 --> 00:39:20,500 There are rules, regulations, correct ways of doing things. 757 00:39:20,600 --> 00:39:21,400 He touched me. 758 00:39:24,367 --> 00:39:25,200 What? 759 00:39:25,300 --> 00:39:26,400 Him. 760 00:39:26,500 --> 00:39:29,133 He touched me in my private area in the toilets. 761 00:39:29,233 --> 00:39:31,800 This-- this is ridiculous. 762 00:39:31,900 --> 00:39:33,767 Obviously, just another set up. 763 00:39:33,867 --> 00:39:35,933 Nothing to do with me. 764 00:39:36,033 --> 00:39:37,633 Nobody is going to believe him. 765 00:39:37,733 --> 00:39:41,100 All allegations of abuse must be dealt with seriously. 766 00:39:41,200 --> 00:39:42,800 If the child is in immediate trouble, 767 00:39:42,900 --> 00:39:44,300 the police should be called. 768 00:39:44,400 --> 00:39:46,633 Otherwise, it must be taken to the Council 769 00:39:46,733 --> 00:39:48,267 Children's Services. 770 00:39:48,367 --> 00:39:51,267 These are the rules, the regulations, 771 00:39:51,367 --> 00:39:54,167 the correct way of doing things. 772 00:39:54,267 --> 00:39:56,300 I'm sure your name will be cleared. 773 00:39:56,400 --> 00:39:59,700 Family, friends, colleagues won't ever think less of you. 774 00:39:59,800 --> 00:40:04,000 No nagging doubt Smoke without fire, so to speak. 775 00:40:06,633 --> 00:40:08,200 Are you threatening me? 776 00:40:08,300 --> 00:40:10,733 Offering you a solution, love. 777 00:40:10,833 --> 00:40:14,300 One word in this kid's ear, he'll keep his trap shut. 778 00:40:14,400 --> 00:40:18,000 I'll make sure the teachers come back, the world keeps turning. 779 00:40:18,100 --> 00:40:22,000 And you can wheel on in next week, full inspection, 780 00:40:22,100 --> 00:40:23,500 proper this time. 781 00:40:23,600 --> 00:40:25,667 You have no justification for this. 782 00:40:25,767 --> 00:40:27,733 I am here to make sure the school runs properly. 783 00:40:27,833 --> 00:40:30,967 Believe me, I give more of a shit about this place 784 00:40:31,067 --> 00:40:32,567 than anyone else. 785 00:40:32,667 --> 00:40:34,300 You have my word on that. 786 00:40:34,400 --> 00:40:36,333 Your word. 787 00:40:36,433 --> 00:40:38,333 I don't even know what you are. 788 00:40:38,433 --> 00:40:41,433 I'm Mrs. Tutton, head of the PTA. 789 00:40:56,333 --> 00:40:57,000 OK. 790 00:40:57,100 --> 00:41:00,600 That got my attention. 791 00:41:00,700 --> 00:41:03,967 Now, go away and ask about the Maguire family. 792 00:41:04,067 --> 00:41:06,100 Look them up online. 793 00:41:06,200 --> 00:41:07,433 Have a read. 794 00:41:07,533 --> 00:41:09,567 Have a think. 795 00:41:09,667 --> 00:41:14,300 Could always use someone like you, when you get out. 796 00:41:14,400 --> 00:41:16,167 Because the way you're going now, 797 00:41:16,267 --> 00:41:20,300 it's Borstal then Strangeways, then a life pissed away. 798 00:41:23,467 --> 00:41:25,100 And I'd hate to see that happen. 799 00:41:35,067 --> 00:41:36,833 You can take those glasses off now. 800 00:41:36,933 --> 00:41:38,233 No, I like them. 801 00:41:38,333 --> 00:41:41,333 Makes me look intellectual, even more intellectual. 802 00:41:41,433 --> 00:41:44,167 We can nip away every so often, be someone else, 803 00:41:44,267 --> 00:41:45,733 like we were today. 804 00:41:45,833 --> 00:41:48,033 So we'd lie about who we are? 805 00:41:48,133 --> 00:41:49,300 Lie's a bit strong. 806 00:41:49,400 --> 00:41:51,433 It's more like we'd have secret identities. 807 00:41:54,600 --> 00:41:59,400 Don't you think, if we have to work that hard to try and hide 808 00:41:59,500 --> 00:42:01,900 something, well, then there's a bigger 809 00:42:02,000 --> 00:42:03,267 problem at the heart of it all. 810 00:42:03,367 --> 00:42:06,133 Let he who is without sin cast the first stone. 811 00:42:14,100 --> 00:42:17,067 I'll give you that, Dom. 812 00:42:17,167 --> 00:42:19,367 Always managed to find faith somewhere. 813 00:42:30,133 --> 00:42:31,200 Come on. 814 00:42:35,467 --> 00:42:39,900 This was a fucking disaster. 815 00:42:40,000 --> 00:42:42,033 Oh, come on, Russell. 816 00:42:42,133 --> 00:42:44,100 You got another shot at the inspection. 817 00:42:44,200 --> 00:42:46,100 Adam Wiggins is out your hair. 818 00:42:46,200 --> 00:42:47,633 And all the teachers are back on Monday. 819 00:42:54,267 --> 00:42:58,433 I believe there's something you want to say to me. 820 00:43:02,867 --> 00:43:05,267 Thank you, Mrs. Tutton. 821 00:43:16,833 --> 00:43:17,900 DOMINIC (VOICEOVER): Maybe the thing 822 00:43:18,000 --> 00:43:19,933 about our secret identities is that they 823 00:43:20,033 --> 00:43:22,700 might be hidden to ourselves. 824 00:43:22,800 --> 00:43:25,533 Oh, you remind me of that fella. 825 00:43:25,633 --> 00:43:26,500 Who's that? 826 00:43:26,600 --> 00:43:27,667 James Bond? 827 00:43:27,767 --> 00:43:28,600 No, the other one. 828 00:43:28,700 --> 00:43:30,167 Simon Templar, the Saint? 829 00:43:30,267 --> 00:43:31,267 Hurricane Higgins. 830 00:43:36,000 --> 00:43:37,333 DOMINIC (VOICEOVER): Like the man 831 00:43:37,433 --> 00:43:39,700 who discovered the simple joys of a hard day's work. 832 00:43:45,167 --> 00:43:47,367 On the house. 833 00:43:47,467 --> 00:43:48,800 Oh, cheers. 834 00:43:48,900 --> 00:43:50,467 Hey, you did good today, kid. 835 00:43:50,567 --> 00:43:53,533 They'll be calling this place St. Mimi's before too long. 836 00:43:53,633 --> 00:43:54,700 Shut up. 837 00:44:01,000 --> 00:44:04,167 We'll just do half this time, eh? 838 00:44:04,267 --> 00:44:05,267 DOMINIC (VOICEOVER): Or the woman 839 00:44:05,367 --> 00:44:06,767 who found a place a million miles 840 00:44:06,867 --> 00:44:10,000 from where she expected it. 841 00:44:10,100 --> 00:44:12,900 That's a million miles metaphorically, obviously. 842 00:44:13,000 --> 00:44:14,100 Not like she went to outer space, 843 00:44:14,200 --> 00:44:16,567 you know, Mars or something. 844 00:44:16,667 --> 00:44:18,367 Or the boy who grew up and found a brother 845 00:44:18,467 --> 00:44:20,467 that he had more in common with than he'd ever heave realized. 846 00:44:20,567 --> 00:44:21,733 There's room for one more, mate. 847 00:44:27,933 --> 00:44:29,400 Cheers, mate. 848 00:44:29,500 --> 00:44:30,433 Nice to meet you. 849 00:44:35,733 --> 00:44:37,567 DOMINIC (VOICEOVER): And the man who found love 850 00:44:37,667 --> 00:44:38,667 found a purpose in life. 851 00:44:43,267 --> 00:44:45,733 I'd search for God in the strangest of places, 852 00:44:45,833 --> 00:44:50,500 but found it in her crooked smile, her dolphin blue eyes, 853 00:44:50,600 --> 00:44:52,600 the way her hair hung upon her face. 854 00:44:57,367 --> 00:44:59,300 But didn't realize that wasn't who he was at all. 855 00:45:03,467 --> 00:45:04,967 Are you waiting for someone? 856 00:45:05,067 --> 00:45:07,333 DOMINIC (VOICEOVER): He was just a man, 857 00:45:07,433 --> 00:45:11,200 waiting for the girl he loved, who was never going to show. 858 00:45:14,600 --> 00:45:17,200 She told herself that this was for the best, that leaving was 859 00:45:17,300 --> 00:45:20,100 the only thing she could do. 860 00:45:20,200 --> 00:45:24,667 She would just be Gloria again, somewhere else. 861 00:45:24,767 --> 00:45:28,267 [music playing] 862 00:46:05,133 --> 00:46:06,033 [knocking] 863 00:46:06,133 --> 00:46:07,600 Come on, Frank. 864 00:46:07,700 --> 00:46:09,600 Come back out. 865 00:46:09,700 --> 00:46:10,667 Frank. 866 00:46:10,767 --> 00:46:11,600 OK. 867 00:46:14,867 --> 00:46:15,667 OK. 868 00:46:24,633 --> 00:46:25,933 Ah, you fucking parasite. 869 00:46:26,033 --> 00:46:27,500 You are a criminal. 870 00:46:34,500 --> 00:46:35,333 Fuck it. 871 00:46:35,433 --> 00:46:38,067 Let's have another go on the swing.