1 00:00:40,665 --> 00:00:42,124 On the count of three. 2 00:00:42,292 --> 00:00:46,003 One, two, three! 3 00:00:47,714 --> 00:00:50,632 Try the ring toss. Three for a quarter. Look how easy it is. 4 00:00:50,800 --> 00:00:53,093 There you go, a winner! 5 00:00:53,261 --> 00:00:57,014 And now, for my shocking finale. 6 00:00:57,182 --> 00:00:59,558 Not for the squeamish. 7 00:00:59,726 --> 00:01:03,020 Not for the faint of heart. 8 00:01:03,772 --> 00:01:08,067 I call my trick "The Jaws of Death." 9 00:01:10,028 --> 00:01:12,488 Now. Say it. Say it. 10 00:01:12,655 --> 00:01:16,283 Harold, use your awesome might to save me from this hopeless plight. 11 00:01:16,451 --> 00:01:18,952 No harm will come to you. Alakazam ! 12 00:01:26,419 --> 00:01:28,212 Help me! Help me! 13 00:01:41,059 --> 00:01:42,726 I'm going to be an actress. 14 00:03:34,672 --> 00:03:36,590 Hard to believe it was last Christmas. . . 15 00:03:36,758 --> 00:03:38,675 . . .that me and Harmony changed the world. 16 00:03:38,843 --> 00:03:42,638 And we didn't mean to. And it didn't last long, you know. 17 00:03:42,805 --> 00:03:44,139 A thing like that can't. 18 00:03:44,307 --> 00:03:48,143 Now that l'm in L.A., l go to parties. The kind where if a girl is named Jill... 19 00:03:48,311 --> 00:03:50,771 ...she spells it J-Y-L-L-E, that bullshit. 20 00:03:51,397 --> 00:03:55,692 That's me there. My name's Harry Lockhart, l'll be your narrator. 21 00:03:55,860 --> 00:03:57,236 Welcome to L.A. 22 00:03:57,403 --> 00:03:58,737 Welcome to the party. 23 00:04:12,543 --> 00:04:16,004 The guy smoking, that's Dabney Shaw, my producer. He discovered me. 24 00:04:16,172 --> 00:04:20,342 The man with him is Perry Van Shrike, a.k.a. Gay Perry. 25 00:04:20,510 --> 00:04:24,096 Honest-to-God private eye, consults in film, TV. Just incorporated. 26 00:04:24,264 --> 00:04:26,682 He's bigtime. Also, he's gay. 27 00:04:26,849 --> 00:04:28,183 Don't start, Perry, huh? 28 00:04:28,351 --> 00:04:31,353 I seen you play ball. You're tough. But you see a naked guy. . . 29 00:04:31,521 --> 00:04:33,188 . . .your brain says, "I want that." 30 00:04:33,356 --> 00:04:36,733 I don't make that leap. It's like, "Look, there's an elephant. Quick. . . 31 00:04:36,901 --> 00:04:39,736 . . . let's drain its blood to paint my boathouse." 32 00:04:39,904 --> 00:04:42,864 It's just that that's not the first thing you think of. 33 00:04:43,032 --> 00:04:44,700 L.A. 34 00:04:44,867 --> 00:04:47,828 By now you may wonder how l wound up here, or maybe not. 35 00:04:47,996 --> 00:04:51,081 Maybe you wonder how Silly Putty picks shit up from comic books. 36 00:04:51,249 --> 00:04:54,293 Point is, I don't see another goddamn narrator, so pipe down. 37 00:04:54,460 --> 00:04:57,296 How did l get here? See for yourself. 38 00:05:04,679 --> 00:05:06,930 Chloe, just run the name by me one more time. . . 39 00:05:07,098 --> 00:05:09,016 . . . because I must be missing something. 40 00:05:09,183 --> 00:05:11,893 I'm going nuts. I've been through the store three times. 41 00:05:12,061 --> 00:05:14,813 Cyber Agent. C-Y-B-E-- Why don't you ask... 42 00:05:14,981 --> 00:05:17,649 -...an employee or something? -No, they're all busy. 43 00:05:19,235 --> 00:05:23,113 "Protocop, protector of man." Is that it? Protocop? He protects men. 44 00:05:23,281 --> 00:05:26,450 Uncle Harry, look around. There are signs. 45 00:05:26,617 --> 00:05:31,455 That show was cancelled two years ago. Just ask-- Wait, are they even open? 46 00:05:31,622 --> 00:05:34,499 Yeah, it's holiday hours. Look-- Get away from the window. 47 00:05:34,667 --> 00:05:37,085 --I gotta go, but I'll find this. 48 00:05:40,465 --> 00:05:42,549 -Great. -Shit, Harry, that shit went wrong ! 49 00:05:42,717 --> 00:05:44,718 -Give me the gun ! -No. Give me the bullets! 50 00:05:44,886 --> 00:05:46,845 Freeze! 51 00:05:47,388 --> 00:05:51,183 -You gotta be fucking kidding me. -We'll stand here and wait for the police. 52 00:05:51,351 --> 00:05:54,895 Drop the gun. We didn't do anything. We are not dangerous. Drop the gun. 53 00:05:55,063 --> 00:05:57,981 -Hey, lady, gun is not loaded-- -Ritchie, no! 54 00:05:59,067 --> 00:06:00,108 Richie! 55 00:06:00,610 --> 00:06:02,027 Shit! 56 00:06:07,116 --> 00:06:08,992 Oh, boy. 57 00:06:20,338 --> 00:06:21,588 Take it easy. 58 00:06:22,673 --> 00:06:25,926 Jesus. Oh, no, no. We're not ready for you yet, sir. 59 00:06:26,094 --> 00:06:29,221 -Go wait with the others. -Grace, do me a favor, let's take him. 60 00:06:29,389 --> 00:06:30,972 -He's ready. You're ready? -Ready? 61 00:06:31,140 --> 00:06:32,516 Okay, come on. 62 00:06:33,559 --> 00:06:35,394 You know the setup? Got any questions? 63 00:06:35,561 --> 00:06:37,938 He's got no questions. Look at him. Let's go. 64 00:06:38,106 --> 00:06:39,439 Let's read. 65 00:06:42,735 --> 00:06:45,445 -Where is he? Where's Raphael? -Where is he? 66 00:06:45,613 --> 00:06:46,947 Where's--? 67 00:06:52,370 --> 00:06:56,081 Beat up on me all night. You want me to give up my partner, you can go spit. 68 00:06:59,669 --> 00:07:01,878 Quit acting like the good guy, jerk-off. 69 00:07:02,130 --> 00:07:03,672 You got your partner killed. 70 00:07:04,424 --> 00:07:06,925 He was in over his head, you knew it. 71 00:07:07,093 --> 00:07:09,261 You may as well have pulled the trigger. 72 00:07:09,429 --> 00:07:10,971 You killed him ! 73 00:07:14,267 --> 00:07:17,853 No, I didn't-- I didn't kill him. He wanted in. 74 00:07:19,313 --> 00:07:20,647 Why--? 75 00:07:21,149 --> 00:07:23,150 Why?! 76 00:07:23,317 --> 00:07:25,610 I didn't want him to come in on it. He insisted. 77 00:07:25,778 --> 00:07:30,699 I said, "Stay at home." But he doesn't listen. He's such a stupid son of a bitch. 78 00:07:31,242 --> 00:07:32,742 I killed him, didn't I? 79 00:07:32,910 --> 00:07:36,872 Oh, fuck, this is my fault. I'm sorry. 80 00:07:43,212 --> 00:07:44,921 Sorry. 81 00:07:45,381 --> 00:07:48,383 Hey, good luck. 82 00:07:49,719 --> 00:07:52,512 See, this is what I'm talking about. Old school. Method. 83 00:07:52,680 --> 00:07:55,015 -Studio. -Brando. Put this in the pouch to L.A. 84 00:07:55,183 --> 00:07:56,516 Get Gay Perry on the phone. 85 00:07:57,101 --> 00:08:00,270 Now, get this, they're screen-testing me. ls that wild? 86 00:08:00,897 --> 00:08:03,440 One minute, l'm boosting Xboxes in the East Village... 87 00:08:03,608 --> 00:08:05,901 ...the next, l'm sipping champagne in L.A. 88 00:08:06,068 --> 00:08:07,903 -Hi. -Hey. 89 00:08:08,070 --> 00:08:09,488 So, what do you do? 90 00:08:09,655 --> 00:08:12,240 I'm retired. I invented dice when I was a kid. 91 00:08:14,035 --> 00:08:16,786 -How about you? -I do a little acting. 92 00:08:20,750 --> 00:08:22,250 I'm gonna see who else is here. 93 00:08:22,418 --> 00:08:24,628 Anyway, that's how l got to the party. 94 00:08:26,172 --> 00:08:28,757 Now, Harmony, different story. 95 00:08:28,925 --> 00:08:32,093 Some will tell you she got here on account of the giant robot. 96 00:08:32,261 --> 00:08:33,762 l'll show you that in a minute. 97 00:08:33,930 --> 00:08:37,057 But for me, robot-schmobot, she was destined to be here. 98 00:08:37,225 --> 00:08:39,017 Jeez, look at those stems, will you? 99 00:08:39,185 --> 00:08:42,270 Not that that's what constitutes why she should be here. 100 00:08:42,438 --> 00:08:44,231 Yes, racist. I'm serious. 101 00:08:44,398 --> 00:08:47,943 The other reindeer laughed at him. Then, out of the blue, they need him. 102 00:08:48,110 --> 00:08:50,070 He's as good as a fog light or whatever. 103 00:08:50,238 --> 00:08:53,490 You know what, so you tell me, how is it any different than: 104 00:08:53,658 --> 00:08:55,867 "Don't talk to Reggie, he's black. 105 00:08:56,035 --> 00:08:59,579 Oh, wait, he can play basketball. Sign him up." 106 00:08:59,747 --> 00:09:02,123 Rudolph, Reggie. 107 00:09:03,501 --> 00:09:06,836 Harmony Faith Lane was your typical L.A. girl, she wasn't from there. 108 00:09:07,004 --> 00:09:09,130 She grew up in a burg in southern lndiana. 109 00:09:09,298 --> 00:09:12,634 "When in doubt, cut up a pig." That was the town motto. 110 00:09:12,802 --> 00:09:16,846 Like most soon-to-be-fucked-up girls, Harmony was wicked smart. 111 00:09:17,014 --> 00:09:18,890 Of course, credit where credit's due... 112 00:09:19,058 --> 00:09:21,643 . . .she had a terrific mentor. No, not her. 113 00:09:21,811 --> 00:09:22,852 Him. 114 00:09:24,730 --> 00:09:26,106 "'Go to hell, Jonny Gossamer!' 115 00:09:26,274 --> 00:09:29,109 She poured herself into a seamless dress. 116 00:09:29,277 --> 00:09:31,820 From the looks of it, she spilled some." 117 00:09:31,988 --> 00:09:34,364 Jonny spoke from the pages of cheap paperbacks... 118 00:09:34,532 --> 00:09:37,701 ...and told of a promised land known as "the Coast"... 119 00:09:37,868 --> 00:09:41,997 ...and a magical city called Los Angeles. 120 00:09:42,164 --> 00:09:45,750 As the years progressed, she wished he was real. 121 00:09:45,918 --> 00:09:50,547 Wished that he would come to lndiana to save her IittIe sister, Jenna. 122 00:09:51,424 --> 00:09:55,385 You see, Papa was at her night after night. 123 00:09:55,678 --> 00:09:57,345 But Jonny never showed. 124 00:09:58,014 --> 00:10:00,682 And then the guy writing the books died. 125 00:10:00,850 --> 00:10:02,559 Age 1 6, she split. 126 00:10:02,727 --> 00:10:05,645 Took the bus to L.A., the promised land. 127 00:10:05,813 --> 00:10:08,523 She'd get rich and famous and then help little sis. 128 00:10:08,691 --> 00:10:10,025 Before he died. . . 129 00:10:10,192 --> 00:10:12,736 ...the guy who wrote the books said Jonny was a joke. 130 00:10:12,903 --> 00:10:14,904 He wrote it for money, and it was bullshit. 131 00:10:15,072 --> 00:10:18,408 Harmony ignored this. She knew better. I mean, who the heII was he? 132 00:10:19,076 --> 00:10:20,410 He was just a writer. 133 00:10:20,578 --> 00:10:23,121 And that's how she got to the same party as me-- 134 00:10:23,289 --> 00:10:24,914 Oh, shit. l skipped something. 135 00:10:25,082 --> 00:10:27,917 Damn it. This robot bit. l made a big deal, then l forgot. 136 00:10:28,085 --> 00:10:30,670 Fuck, bad narrating. Like my dad telling a joke. 137 00:10:30,838 --> 00:10:34,758 "Oh, wait, back up. l forgot to tell you the cowboy rode a blue horse." Fuck. 138 00:10:34,925 --> 00:10:38,595 l don't know if you want to see it now, but here's the fucking robot stuff. 139 00:10:38,763 --> 00:10:40,096 Can l say "fuck" more? 140 00:10:40,264 --> 00:10:42,807 Now back to Protocop, starring Jeff Neal. 141 00:11:08,084 --> 00:11:10,168 What the--? 142 00:11:13,714 --> 00:11:15,006 Oh, my God. 143 00:11:17,009 --> 00:11:18,635 Hey! 144 00:11:24,725 --> 00:11:28,228 Sources close to Neal, who has not worked as an actor in two years... 145 00:11:28,396 --> 00:11:30,563 ...say he seemed despondent earlier tonight... 146 00:11:30,731 --> 00:11:32,732 ...during a rerun of Protocop. 147 00:11:32,900 --> 00:11:35,860 The actor, who stiII retains a costume he wore on the show. . . 148 00:11:36,028 --> 00:11:37,487 ...allegedly dressed up... 149 00:11:37,655 --> 00:11:41,616 ...stumbled down the bike path and wandered into this Venice Beach house. . . 150 00:11:41,784 --> 00:11:46,413 ...where aspiring actress Harmony Faith Lane was shocked to discover him. 151 00:11:46,580 --> 00:11:49,874 l'd jog by, "Hi, hello," you know, that sort of thing. 152 00:11:50,042 --> 00:11:51,584 -Who's this? -l feel for the guy. 153 00:11:51,752 --> 00:11:54,129 This city can't get enough of messing with people. 154 00:11:54,296 --> 00:11:57,590 Like putting a whoopee cushion on the seat of an electric chair. 155 00:11:57,758 --> 00:11:59,676 -Like that. -They always do this. 156 00:11:59,844 --> 00:12:03,722 You can never see below the waist. It's like a Playmate in 1 964. 157 00:12:03,889 --> 00:12:07,100 It was always behind the bedpost or there's a shadow. You never-- 158 00:12:07,268 --> 00:12:09,978 What am I telling you for? Invite her to something. 159 00:12:10,604 --> 00:12:12,939 And there it was. Bingo. 160 00:12:14,150 --> 00:12:16,151 Destiny. 161 00:13:19,632 --> 00:13:22,300 You know what, you better be her doctor. 162 00:13:22,885 --> 00:13:24,803 Walk away. Don't think, just do it. 163 00:13:24,970 --> 00:13:28,807 What, are you her brother or something? It's none of your business, man. 164 00:13:30,434 --> 00:13:33,228 -I will fuck you up. -No, you'll try. 165 00:13:33,395 --> 00:13:36,189 And that little experiment will end in tears, my friend. 166 00:13:36,357 --> 00:13:40,443 So again, for the cheap seats, do not think, walk the fuck away. 167 00:13:40,611 --> 00:13:42,737 Or let's you and me go outside right now. 168 00:13:42,905 --> 00:13:45,323 It's past my bedtime. 169 00:13:45,491 --> 00:13:47,534 Make a choice. 170 00:14:03,300 --> 00:14:05,343 Asshole. 171 00:14:09,265 --> 00:14:11,015 You all right? 172 00:14:11,809 --> 00:14:13,601 Yeah. 173 00:14:14,103 --> 00:14:15,436 Thanks, bro. 174 00:14:15,604 --> 00:14:17,939 One day, I'll actually learn how to fight. 175 00:14:18,107 --> 00:14:20,441 -Perry Van Shrike. -Hey. Harry Lockhart. 176 00:14:21,777 --> 00:14:25,697 I heard about you. You're the whatchamacallit, the consultant. 177 00:14:25,865 --> 00:14:29,200 -You must be-- Anyway. . . . -Gay Perry? 178 00:14:29,368 --> 00:14:32,412 Yeah. Right. Dabney calls you that. 179 00:14:32,580 --> 00:14:34,956 -I guess you guys are old buddies. -Five years. 180 00:14:35,124 --> 00:14:37,292 Wow, five years. 181 00:14:37,459 --> 00:14:38,918 -Still gay? -Me? No. 182 00:14:39,086 --> 00:14:43,882 I'm knee-deep in pussy. I just like the name so much, I can't get rid of it. 183 00:14:44,550 --> 00:14:49,012 You should know better than to fall asleep at a party. There's freaks here. 184 00:14:51,390 --> 00:14:53,474 Dabney wants you to take detective lessons. 185 00:14:53,642 --> 00:14:56,269 -Come again? -For your acting. 186 00:14:56,437 --> 00:14:58,354 I've got surveillance tomorrow. You game? 187 00:14:58,522 --> 00:15:00,273 What's the person like? Crime lord? 188 00:15:00,441 --> 00:15:03,526 Please. I'm guessing some sad, lonely little man. . . 189 00:15:03,694 --> 00:15:06,863 . . .who single-handedly haunts his own home in the Hollywood Hills. 190 00:15:07,031 --> 00:15:09,365 That was incredibly gay. 191 00:15:09,533 --> 00:15:12,785 -Good God. Ouch. -Yeah, you should see the other guy. 192 00:15:12,953 --> 00:15:16,205 Harry, this is our generous host, Harlan Dexter. 193 00:15:16,373 --> 00:15:20,877 Ah, yes, of course. You're Dabney's golden boy from back East. 194 00:15:21,045 --> 00:15:22,795 I hope it isn't past your bedtime. 195 00:15:22,963 --> 00:15:25,381 No, sir. My mom used to say I had the neon disease. 196 00:15:25,549 --> 00:15:27,550 When the neon lights came on, I woke up. 197 00:15:27,718 --> 00:15:31,888 I'm afraid I'm similarly afflicted. My daughter just lived 1 0 years in Paris. 198 00:15:32,056 --> 00:15:35,642 She says it is heaven for the vampire set. 199 00:15:37,019 --> 00:15:41,898 If you'll excuse me, apparently I'm meant to help cut this monstrosity. 200 00:15:42,650 --> 00:15:46,486 Mom's gone, so it's just him and his born-again little bundle of joy. 201 00:15:46,654 --> 00:15:48,696 -Born-again? That's precious. -Isn't it? 202 00:15:48,864 --> 00:15:51,574 Three months ago, she was suing him over Mom's millions. 203 00:15:51,742 --> 00:15:53,785 He called her a-- Well, a bad word. 204 00:15:55,204 --> 00:15:58,831 Cunt. Welcome to Hollywood. 205 00:15:58,999 --> 00:16:01,709 Okay, l apologize. 206 00:16:01,877 --> 00:16:05,380 That is a terrible scene. lt's like, "Why was that in the movie? 207 00:16:05,547 --> 00:16:07,966 Gee, you think maybe it'll come back later, maybe?" 208 00:16:08,133 --> 00:16:11,094 I hate that. A TV's on, talking about the new power plant. 209 00:16:11,261 --> 00:16:13,012 Wonder where the climax will happen. 210 00:16:13,180 --> 00:16:17,100 Or that shot of the cook in Hunt for Red October. Sorry. 211 00:16:17,267 --> 00:16:19,727 Hi, thank you for coming. 212 00:16:19,895 --> 00:16:22,814 Hey, do you know that blond gal who just left? 213 00:16:22,982 --> 00:16:26,567 Oh, the one with the guy that beat the shit out of you? No. 214 00:16:26,735 --> 00:16:28,528 Bye, have a better night. 215 00:16:28,696 --> 00:16:30,947 She had something, that gal, this quality. 216 00:16:31,115 --> 00:16:32,740 Like the girl from high school. . . 217 00:16:32,908 --> 00:16:36,244 . . .the one that got away. You know what I mean? That haunts you still. 218 00:16:36,412 --> 00:16:38,371 -Yeah, I had that. -You did? 219 00:16:38,539 --> 00:16:40,790 Bobby Mills. 220 00:16:42,710 --> 00:16:44,877 Well, maybe you should try to get in touch. 221 00:16:45,045 --> 00:16:47,338 I got 5 bucks says you could still get him. 222 00:16:47,506 --> 00:16:50,800 Really? That's funny. I got a 1 0 says, "Pass the pepper." 223 00:16:50,968 --> 00:16:53,720 I got two quarters harmonizing on "Moonlight in Vermont." 224 00:16:53,887 --> 00:16:55,930 -What? -Talking money. 225 00:16:56,098 --> 00:16:58,266 -A talking monkey? -Talking monkey, yeah. 226 00:16:58,434 --> 00:17:01,769 Came here from the future. Ugly sucker. Only says, "Ficus." 227 00:17:03,188 --> 00:17:04,939 Detective lessons tomorrow. 228 00:17:05,107 --> 00:17:06,482 -Don't forget. -Okay. 229 00:17:06,650 --> 00:17:07,984 And Harry. . . . 230 00:17:08,152 --> 00:17:09,902 Come here. 231 00:17:10,070 --> 00:17:12,488 That girl, I know her. She's done some work for me. 232 00:17:13,365 --> 00:17:15,324 Try the Domino Room. 233 00:17:15,492 --> 00:17:17,160 Where's that? 234 00:17:34,261 --> 00:17:37,221 -Hey there. I'm Flicka. -Hey. 235 00:17:37,389 --> 00:17:40,308 -How are you? -Good. So, what do you do? 236 00:17:41,977 --> 00:17:45,354 -I'm a private detective. And you? -I'm a stewardess. 237 00:17:45,522 --> 00:17:47,315 -Really? -Yeah. 238 00:17:47,483 --> 00:17:49,650 -Well, nice to meet you. -That it? 239 00:17:49,818 --> 00:17:51,944 -Yeah. -Yep. 240 00:17:59,036 --> 00:18:01,913 Could I have a Jack and soda? Thanks. 241 00:18:02,331 --> 00:18:04,957 Evening. Harry. 242 00:18:06,752 --> 00:18:08,377 God, I'm sore. 243 00:18:08,545 --> 00:18:12,799 I mean, physically, not like a guy who's angry in a movie in the 1 950s. 244 00:18:16,845 --> 00:18:20,264 -Didn't I see you at a party hours ago? -Why? 245 00:18:20,432 --> 00:18:22,058 -Why what? -Why me? 246 00:18:22,226 --> 00:18:27,063 Seriously, why not the girl over there? Look, she's very pretty. 247 00:18:27,231 --> 00:18:28,564 Which one? 248 00:18:28,732 --> 00:18:31,109 On the leftt, next to Brazilian Billy Bob Thornton. 249 00:18:31,276 --> 00:18:33,361 Oh, that's a bit of a reach. 250 00:18:33,529 --> 00:18:36,072 I'm interrupting. I feel badly. What are you drinking? 251 00:18:36,240 --> 00:18:38,866 -Bad. -Bad? Sorry? 252 00:18:39,034 --> 00:18:40,701 -You feel bad. -Bad? 253 00:18:40,869 --> 00:18:44,247 "Badly" is an adverb. To say you feel badly says that the mechanism. . . 254 00:18:44,414 --> 00:18:49,127 -. . .which allows you to feel is broken. -Well, that one over there? 255 00:18:49,294 --> 00:18:51,129 Between-- Oh, God, nix, nix. That's-- 256 00:18:51,964 --> 00:18:54,715 -The blond. The blond's pathetic. -Because? 257 00:18:54,883 --> 00:18:59,595 For starters, she's been fucked more times than she's had hot meals. 258 00:18:59,763 --> 00:19:02,557 I heard. It was neck and neck, and then she skipped lunch. 259 00:19:02,724 --> 00:19:04,392 -Worst thing, though. . . . -Do tell. 260 00:19:04,560 --> 00:19:07,520 Worst thing is she's 35 years old and still trying to act. 261 00:19:08,021 --> 00:19:10,523 I see her at auditions all the time. 262 00:19:11,024 --> 00:19:13,860 -It's over, baby. You missed. -That's charitable of you. 263 00:19:14,027 --> 00:19:15,570 May I ask how old you are? 264 00:19:16,613 --> 00:19:18,281 -Go for it. -Okay, how old are you? 265 00:19:18,448 --> 00:19:19,824 -Thirty-four. -Yeah? 266 00:19:19,992 --> 00:19:23,661 -I'm a baby. -Where's your buddy? The guy you-- 267 00:19:23,829 --> 00:19:27,165 -The guy you left the party with? -He's a fucking asshole. 268 00:19:27,332 --> 00:19:29,375 I just needed a ride. Sorry, I swear a lot. 269 00:19:29,543 --> 00:19:31,544 -I know. It's okay. -Did you know the host? 270 00:19:31,712 --> 00:19:34,046 -No. -He looked familiar, though. 271 00:19:34,214 --> 00:19:36,174 Probably an actor. 272 00:19:38,177 --> 00:19:39,427 Go away, Mr. Fly. 273 00:19:40,804 --> 00:19:43,973 -I was talking to your friend. -She doesn't want to talk to you. 274 00:19:44,141 --> 00:19:46,642 Sunshine, she'll be back to you in a minute. Relax. 275 00:19:46,810 --> 00:19:48,686 She doesn't have a minute. 276 00:19:51,815 --> 00:19:54,650 Tell you what, if you change your mind about that drink. . . 277 00:19:54,818 --> 00:19:58,112 . . . I'll be over there with Native American Joe Pesci. 278 00:20:01,200 --> 00:20:03,784 -You are so. . . . -That was good, right? 279 00:20:03,952 --> 00:20:05,786 Why are you humoring him? Stop it. 280 00:20:05,954 --> 00:20:08,789 You know what, there's an empty table over there. 281 00:20:08,957 --> 00:20:11,959 I hear it's a recommended cheeseball hangout. 282 00:20:12,127 --> 00:20:14,503 Your mouth is a recommended place to put a sock. 283 00:20:14,671 --> 00:20:17,256 Princess. Scary friend. 284 00:20:18,258 --> 00:20:19,675 Goddamn it. 285 00:20:19,843 --> 00:20:23,971 Harry Lockhart, are you gonna recognize me or what? 286 00:20:24,139 --> 00:20:26,390 God ! Embrey, Indiana! 287 00:20:28,727 --> 00:20:31,145 Loves snakes, afraid of spiders. 288 00:20:33,065 --> 00:20:35,858 Come on, remember? You were Amazing Harry-- 289 00:20:36,026 --> 00:20:38,527 -No, no, no. Harold the Great. -Harmony? 290 00:20:38,695 --> 00:20:40,071 You cut me in half, remember? 291 00:20:40,239 --> 00:20:44,200 Oh, shit. Oh, my God. How are you? 292 00:20:44,368 --> 00:20:46,535 Okay, l was a bad narrator again... 293 00:20:46,703 --> 00:20:49,830 ...because the kid at the beginning, the magician, that was me. 294 00:20:49,998 --> 00:20:51,749 l don't want to put this on you... 295 00:20:51,917 --> 00:20:54,877 ...but if you've been paying attention, l shouldn't have to-- 296 00:20:55,045 --> 00:20:57,421 Great. No wonder. Ma and Pa Kettle. l got an idea. 297 00:20:57,589 --> 00:21:01,259 Why not put these two lame-o extras in front of the mammoth fucking lens? 298 00:21:01,426 --> 00:21:03,511 Boo. Scat. Fat lady, leave. 299 00:21:03,679 --> 00:21:05,972 See there? "Harold." 300 00:21:06,139 --> 00:21:08,766 Remember how l said this high school chick haunted me? 301 00:21:08,934 --> 00:21:10,977 How seeing Harmony made me think of her? 302 00:21:11,144 --> 00:21:13,646 That's because it was her. lt all came flooding back. 303 00:21:15,274 --> 00:21:17,233 How l was the one she confided in. 304 00:21:18,860 --> 00:21:20,278 While she was doing every other guy. 305 00:21:21,655 --> 00:21:24,323 lt was the first time l felt that how pitying someone... 306 00:21:24,491 --> 00:21:27,618 ...and wanting to fuck them can get all tangled up in your head. 307 00:21:27,786 --> 00:21:30,204 Overwhelming sadness. Meanwhile, you got a rodney. 308 00:21:30,372 --> 00:21:34,292 ls that sick? l think-- Yeah, I think that's sick. 309 00:21:35,294 --> 00:21:40,172 Leaving my sister back home, leaving her there all alone. . . . 310 00:21:42,259 --> 00:21:44,844 Hardest thing I ever did. 311 00:21:47,556 --> 00:21:51,559 Do you remember when we were real little. . . 312 00:21:51,727 --> 00:21:54,854 . . .and a movie crew came to town? 313 00:21:55,022 --> 00:21:57,982 That mystery flick with the guy, Jonny what's-his-name? 314 00:21:58,150 --> 00:22:00,026 -Gossamer. -Jonny Gossamer. Right. 315 00:22:00,193 --> 00:22:03,362 Your mom went nuts, and she bought all the books and stuff. 316 00:22:03,739 --> 00:22:07,908 -That was-- God, that was forever ago. -Yeah, that was back in the day. 317 00:22:09,244 --> 00:22:10,703 Harry. . . 318 00:22:11,872 --> 00:22:13,998 . . . I didn't get famous. 319 00:22:15,959 --> 00:22:17,793 Yet. 320 00:22:21,048 --> 00:22:22,798 I did. . . 321 00:22:22,966 --> 00:22:24,884 . . .get to do this one commercial. 322 00:22:25,052 --> 00:22:27,428 You're shitting me. Which one? 323 00:22:27,596 --> 00:22:30,097 Well, you know the one with the bear? 324 00:22:30,265 --> 00:22:33,642 And it goes-- Well, this is funny. 325 00:22:33,810 --> 00:22:36,729 -"I prefer Genaros, but--" -"But I'm a bear, what do I know? 326 00:22:36,897 --> 00:22:38,731 I suck heads off fish." That was you? 327 00:22:38,899 --> 00:22:41,734 -Oh, my God. -Yeah, it was. Yeah. 328 00:22:41,902 --> 00:22:43,611 -That's awesome. -Commercial. 329 00:22:43,779 --> 00:22:45,279 Come on, that's a big deal. 330 00:22:45,447 --> 00:22:47,531 -That's a national commercial. -Harry, stop. 331 00:22:47,699 --> 00:22:51,410 It's nothing. There was actually this kind of cool moment where I got. . . 332 00:22:51,578 --> 00:22:53,579 . . .to sort of do the wave. 333 00:22:56,416 --> 00:22:58,000 "I prefer Genaros." 334 00:22:58,168 --> 00:23:00,461 -Whatever, it's nothing. -It's pretty cool. 335 00:23:00,629 --> 00:23:03,464 -It's nothing special at all. -Well, I think it's special. 336 00:23:04,341 --> 00:23:07,009 Punk-rock Steven Seagal thinks it's special. 337 00:23:07,177 --> 00:23:09,762 Right there, at your 1 1 o'clock. 338 00:23:09,930 --> 00:23:11,430 That's dead-on, right? 339 00:23:11,598 --> 00:23:14,392 That's all right. I had him pegged when I came in. 340 00:23:15,310 --> 00:23:19,271 Come back to the hotel for a little while, just have one drink. Bring your friend. 341 00:23:19,439 --> 00:23:23,401 It'd just be a drink. You'll be home faster than you can say "Jack Robinson." 342 00:23:23,568 --> 00:23:25,778 I don't know about that. I can say. . . 343 00:23:27,197 --> 00:23:30,741 -. . ."Jack Robinson" pretty fast. -I'm timing you. 344 00:23:32,244 --> 00:23:34,286 Jack Robinson. 345 00:24:02,899 --> 00:24:05,651 -Do you have any idea what time it is? -I'm really sorry. 346 00:24:05,819 --> 00:24:08,529 God, you still look great. You're just stunning. I like-- 347 00:24:08,697 --> 00:24:10,489 -Why are you here? -Good question. 348 00:24:10,657 --> 00:24:13,075 Sounds crazy, but I don't remember what occurred. . . 349 00:24:13,243 --> 00:24:15,244 . . . between the hours of 2 and 5, a blur. 350 00:24:15,412 --> 00:24:17,496 -Really? Where's Marleah? -Marleah? 351 00:24:17,664 --> 00:24:20,374 -The girl you. . . . -Marleah fell asleep at my place. . . 352 00:24:20,542 --> 00:24:22,042 . . .and I didn't see you leave-- 353 00:24:22,210 --> 00:24:24,587 I left when you had your tongue down her throat. 354 00:24:24,754 --> 00:24:26,088 -I did? -Yeah. 355 00:24:26,256 --> 00:24:28,632 God. No, wrong throat, wrong woman. That's bad. 356 00:24:28,800 --> 00:24:31,051 Yeah, that's bad. You got 1 0 seconds, Harry. 357 00:24:31,219 --> 00:24:33,220 Oh, boy, pressure, pressure. I came here. . . 358 00:24:33,388 --> 00:24:35,890 . . . because I think you're intelligent and attractive-- 359 00:24:36,057 --> 00:24:39,518 That's plenty. Stop. Oh, my God ! I can't believe you'd come here. . . 360 00:24:39,686 --> 00:24:42,396 . . .to tell me you like me after you fucked my friend ! 361 00:24:42,564 --> 00:24:45,024 That's just it, I didn't. I believe that I did not. 362 00:24:45,192 --> 00:24:46,901 What? You said you don't remember! 363 00:24:47,068 --> 00:24:50,488 If I don't remember because I was drunk, how could I have gotten it up? 364 00:24:50,655 --> 00:24:52,656 I know this is outrageous and not normal. 365 00:24:52,824 --> 00:24:56,702 I'm not pretending that I'm normal. I just chickened out-- 366 00:24:57,162 --> 00:25:00,956 Moron. Why? Why? Why? 367 00:25:30,570 --> 00:25:34,031 And the plots, they all have this thing, this formula that was so cool. 368 00:25:34,199 --> 00:25:36,492 Seriously, I would go through one in a day. 369 00:25:36,660 --> 00:25:40,204 -A whole book in one day. Wow. -See, Gossamer would always take on. . . 370 00:25:40,372 --> 00:25:42,540 . . .two cases that were seemingly unrelated. 371 00:25:42,707 --> 00:25:45,042 One's normal and the other's some wild shit. . . 372 00:25:45,210 --> 00:25:47,461 . . .then you'd find out that they're connected. 373 00:25:47,629 --> 00:25:49,630 That it's all one case. 374 00:25:49,798 --> 00:25:51,257 That's the essence of the-- 375 00:25:51,424 --> 00:25:55,844 Yeah, I get that all the time. Would you mind not rooting around in there? 376 00:25:56,680 --> 00:25:58,138 It's tiny. Is this real? 377 00:25:58,306 --> 00:26:01,475 Yeah, it's a derringer. It's loaded. 378 00:26:01,935 --> 00:26:05,187 -I call it my faggot gun. -Because? 379 00:26:05,355 --> 00:26:09,441 It's only good for a couple shots, then you gotta drop it for something better. 380 00:26:10,819 --> 00:26:12,695 You asked, chief. 381 00:26:14,114 --> 00:26:16,198 On with our lesson. 382 00:26:16,908 --> 00:26:21,203 -My client is one Allison Ames. A-M-E-S. -Ames. 383 00:26:21,371 --> 00:26:24,582 Female. She hired me to do some video surveillance. 384 00:26:24,749 --> 00:26:26,333 -Is she a looker? -Oh, man. 385 00:26:26,501 --> 00:26:29,795 She opens the door, she got nothing on but the radio. 386 00:26:30,338 --> 00:26:32,339 Invites me to sit down, sits on my lap. . . 387 00:26:32,507 --> 00:26:34,842 -. . .fires up a smoke. -Really? 388 00:26:35,010 --> 00:26:37,511 No. Idiot. 389 00:26:37,679 --> 00:26:39,638 She hired me over the phone. 390 00:26:39,806 --> 00:26:42,850 -Paid for it with a credit card. -Okay. 391 00:26:43,018 --> 00:26:48,564 Rule number one: This business, real life, it's boring. 392 00:26:48,732 --> 00:26:51,108 -Do you have to smoke? -You want me to put it out? 393 00:26:51,276 --> 00:26:55,446 Yeah, soon as you find a large, brown clump of shrubs, just throw it in there. 394 00:26:55,614 --> 00:26:59,408 So you knew Harmony in high school. You said she dissed you. 395 00:26:59,576 --> 00:27:01,994 No, not really. She fucked every other guy but me. 396 00:27:02,162 --> 00:27:04,371 No, that's not true. She made one concession. 397 00:27:04,539 --> 00:27:07,041 She agreed not to fuck my best friend, Chook Chutney. 398 00:27:07,208 --> 00:27:09,501 He was my best friend, so she gave me that. 399 00:27:09,669 --> 00:27:13,422 -Well, that was nice of her. -Even if he asked, she said she wouldn't. 400 00:27:13,590 --> 00:27:16,467 Stay put. Be quiet. 401 00:27:16,635 --> 00:27:20,638 "Chook Chutney"? Yeah, he's gay. 402 00:27:35,862 --> 00:27:39,698 -What's wrong with his car? -Do I look like a mechanic? 403 00:27:41,660 --> 00:27:44,370 -Are we gonna follow him? -Where'd he go? 404 00:27:44,537 --> 00:27:48,040 He was right in front of us, then he cut in-- Where is he? 405 00:27:51,878 --> 00:27:55,297 What the hell. He's gotta be somewhere. He turned right in front of us. 406 00:28:01,221 --> 00:28:03,681 -Jesus! -Shit! 407 00:28:03,848 --> 00:28:05,349 Harry, come back. 408 00:28:05,517 --> 00:28:06,892 Harry. 409 00:28:07,060 --> 00:28:09,937 -There's no one in the car. Harry. -What? 410 00:28:10,105 --> 00:28:12,231 Harry, stop. 411 00:28:13,108 --> 00:28:15,234 -I think it's going down. -Wait, the sound. 412 00:28:15,402 --> 00:28:17,528 -Check the back seat. -No, get the keys! 413 00:28:17,696 --> 00:28:19,905 The keys! Get the keys! 414 00:28:25,412 --> 00:28:26,662 Perry. 415 00:28:28,623 --> 00:28:30,499 Perry? 416 00:28:31,835 --> 00:28:33,460 Shit. 417 00:28:36,756 --> 00:28:38,841 Perry! 418 00:28:41,970 --> 00:28:44,346 Where'd she come from? 419 00:28:44,514 --> 00:28:47,975 She was in the trunk. I had to shoot the lock to get it open. 420 00:28:48,143 --> 00:28:49,476 Oh, Jesus. 421 00:28:50,979 --> 00:28:53,063 God, what did they do to her face? 422 00:28:54,941 --> 00:28:58,736 -Is she dead? -No. She's resting her eyes for a minute. 423 00:28:58,903 --> 00:29:01,196 Of course she's fucking dead. Her neck's broken. 424 00:29:15,003 --> 00:29:17,421 -Hey, what the hell's going on? -Shut up. 425 00:29:18,506 --> 00:29:20,883 -Hey, we got a dead girl here! -Hey, shut up. 426 00:29:21,050 --> 00:29:23,510 Two guys in masks, and there they go. 427 00:29:23,678 --> 00:29:25,554 What the fuck is going on? This is bad. 428 00:29:25,722 --> 00:29:27,598 We gotta roll before the cops come. 429 00:29:27,766 --> 00:29:30,726 -Nix. We go right to the cops. -Exactly, to the cops. . . 430 00:29:30,894 --> 00:29:34,563 . . .who'll believe that she broke her neck before you shot her in the head. 431 00:29:34,731 --> 00:29:36,148 What? 432 00:29:36,316 --> 00:29:38,609 -Come on, we gotta go. -Oh, God. 433 00:29:38,777 --> 00:29:41,236 -We gotta go. Go, go, go. -Oh, God. 434 00:29:41,404 --> 00:29:43,155 Oh, God. 435 00:29:43,323 --> 00:29:46,241 -All right, we're out of here. -We gotta go, go, go. 436 00:29:46,409 --> 00:29:47,743 Where's my gun? 437 00:29:47,911 --> 00:29:49,745 -No, I-- -Give me my gun. 438 00:29:49,913 --> 00:29:51,413 -I got rid of it. -Say again. 439 00:29:51,581 --> 00:29:53,665 Threw it in the lake. You wouldn't, I would. 440 00:29:53,833 --> 00:29:56,502 I got priors in New York, so I can't be messing around-- 441 00:29:56,669 --> 00:29:58,462 -You threw it away? -It's evidence. 442 00:29:58,630 --> 00:30:00,964 -Watch it. Relax. -Okay, okay. No, I'm sorry. 443 00:30:01,132 --> 00:30:04,176 -I got a little nonplussed there. -This is crazy. I understand. 444 00:30:04,636 --> 00:30:07,095 -What is that? Is that a clue? -What do you mean? 445 00:30:07,263 --> 00:30:08,764 -Do you see that? -In the thing? 446 00:30:09,641 --> 00:30:10,974 What were you thinking? 447 00:30:11,142 --> 00:30:14,269 My $2000 ceramic Vektor my mother got me as a special gift. . . 448 00:30:14,437 --> 00:30:17,773 . . .you threw next to the car. What happens when they drag the lake? 449 00:30:17,941 --> 00:30:19,608 You think they'll find my pistol? 450 00:30:19,776 --> 00:30:23,362 Jesus. Look up "idiot" in the dictionary. You know what you'll find? 451 00:30:23,530 --> 00:30:25,113 -A picture of me? -No. . . 452 00:30:25,281 --> 00:30:28,742 . . .the definition of the word "idiot," which you fucking are. 453 00:30:30,620 --> 00:30:32,538 Bitch client. 454 00:30:32,705 --> 00:30:34,873 Hires me, has me witness a murder. 455 00:30:35,041 --> 00:30:37,334 -Can I use a dry towel? This towel's wet. -No. 456 00:30:37,502 --> 00:30:39,753 -This towel is wet. -The towel is for the seat. 457 00:30:39,921 --> 00:30:42,714 This was for your shoes. You handed it to me for my face? 458 00:30:42,882 --> 00:30:45,300 -This is wet. Can I use a dry--? -It's dirty. No. 459 00:30:45,468 --> 00:30:48,178 -Can I--? -No. Stop dripping. 460 00:30:48,555 --> 00:30:51,515 Shit better be improving your acting. 461 00:31:03,611 --> 00:31:05,237 -Get out. -Sorry about the gun. 462 00:31:05,405 --> 00:31:07,155 Whatever. Out. 463 00:31:07,782 --> 00:31:09,533 Go. Sleep badly. 464 00:31:10,410 --> 00:31:12,411 Any questions, hesitate to call. 465 00:31:12,579 --> 00:31:14,538 -Bad. -Excuse me? 466 00:31:14,706 --> 00:31:16,039 Sleep bad. 467 00:31:16,207 --> 00:31:19,209 Otherwise, it seems like the mechanism that allows sleep-- 468 00:31:19,377 --> 00:31:22,921 What, fuckhead? "Badly" is an adverb. Who taught you grammar? Out. Vanish. 469 00:31:25,800 --> 00:31:27,509 -I'll give you a buzz. -Die. 470 00:31:37,562 --> 00:31:39,438 That's all right, don't apologize. 471 00:31:39,606 --> 00:31:42,941 -Blow me. You forgot this. -Oh, thanks. 472 00:31:43,860 --> 00:31:45,986 -Hello? -l'm trying to locate Harry Lockhart. 473 00:31:46,154 --> 00:31:47,905 -Speaking. -l'm detective Sgt. Kale. 474 00:31:48,072 --> 00:31:50,198 Mind answering a question or two? 475 00:31:50,366 --> 00:31:52,451 Of course, no problem. Fire away, officer. 476 00:31:52,619 --> 00:31:55,954 Are you familiar with a woman by the name of Harmony Faith Lane? 477 00:31:56,122 --> 00:31:57,456 Yeah, what's this--? 478 00:31:57,624 --> 00:32:00,542 Are you aware of giving your number to Miss Lane recently? 479 00:32:00,710 --> 00:32:02,794 -On a slip of paper, perhaps? -No. 480 00:32:02,962 --> 00:32:05,964 -Are you sure? -Well, maybe she had my number. Why? 481 00:32:06,132 --> 00:32:09,968 We're required by law to treat every suicide as a potential homicide. 482 00:32:10,136 --> 00:32:12,262 Harmony Lane shot herself, sir. 483 00:32:12,430 --> 00:32:14,932 -Suicide? -Yes-- 484 00:32:15,099 --> 00:32:18,560 Hello? 485 00:32:21,481 --> 00:32:23,398 -I'll be goddamned. -Jesus. 486 00:32:28,696 --> 00:32:30,447 Don't blame yourself. Listen. . . 487 00:32:30,615 --> 00:32:33,867 -. . .sometimes these things just happen-- -For a reason. 488 00:32:34,035 --> 00:32:36,203 For a reason? Fuck that. 489 00:32:38,039 --> 00:32:41,041 Why? Because I fall off a building, 1 0 people in Baltimore. . . 490 00:32:41,209 --> 00:32:43,043 . . .survive a bus crash? 491 00:32:43,211 --> 00:32:47,547 Swell, they're enjoying Baltimore. I'm lying here with my brains out. 492 00:32:49,008 --> 00:32:51,051 I've been to Baltimore, you win. 493 00:32:52,553 --> 00:32:54,721 Listen. . . 494 00:32:56,516 --> 00:32:59,935 -. . . I'm really sorry. I gotta go. -Yeah. 495 00:33:02,188 --> 00:33:04,189 I gotta go. 496 00:33:06,150 --> 00:33:07,859 I have to go. 497 00:33:22,375 --> 00:33:25,377 Genaros. Pure drinking pleasure. 498 00:33:25,545 --> 00:33:28,547 l prefer Genaros. But what do l know? l'm a bear. 499 00:33:28,715 --> 00:33:31,591 l suck the heads off fish. 500 00:33:33,136 --> 00:33:34,928 Genaros. 501 00:33:37,390 --> 00:33:41,977 l was tired. l was pissed. l was wetter than Drew Barrymore at a grunge club. 502 00:33:42,145 --> 00:33:45,605 I needed a hot bath, a warm bed. 503 00:33:47,525 --> 00:33:50,068 But the night had other plans for me. 504 00:33:50,236 --> 00:33:52,279 -Oh, you did? -l got the Cyber Agent. 505 00:33:52,447 --> 00:33:55,365 -You got the Cyber Agent. -lt has all the cool weapons. 506 00:33:55,533 --> 00:33:56,992 You got Protocop coming too. 507 00:33:57,160 --> 00:34:00,912 It's gonna be worth more too because I think he's, like, paralyzed now. 508 00:34:02,665 --> 00:34:03,999 Son of a bitch ! 509 00:34:04,167 --> 00:34:08,462 See, l forgot, old Jonny, he always had two cases. Remember? 510 00:34:08,629 --> 00:34:10,213 How are you? 511 00:34:10,423 --> 00:34:12,215 Hey. 512 00:34:14,343 --> 00:34:16,261 She's gone, Harry. 513 00:34:16,429 --> 00:34:19,181 -Yeah. -She's gone. 514 00:34:19,348 --> 00:34:22,434 I know. Who? 515 00:34:22,935 --> 00:34:25,937 Fact is, she stole not only your credit card, but your ID. 516 00:34:26,147 --> 00:34:28,648 We're very sorry about the mix-up on our part. 517 00:34:28,816 --> 00:34:32,110 So are you willing to positively identify this woman as your-- 518 00:34:32,320 --> 00:34:34,237 -My sister! Yes! -Your sister was here? 519 00:34:34,447 --> 00:34:36,490 Oh, God ! God, we haven't spoken in years. 520 00:34:36,657 --> 00:34:39,201 She's never forgiven me for leaving her all alone. 521 00:34:39,410 --> 00:34:42,245 -I'm just gonna get you a blanket. -I don't want a blanket! 522 00:34:42,413 --> 00:34:44,122 -But you're shivering. -I don't care! 523 00:34:44,332 --> 00:34:46,458 You're freaking me out. Will you relax, okay? 524 00:34:46,626 --> 00:34:48,627 -Oh, God. -I'm so glad that you're okay. . . 525 00:34:48,795 --> 00:34:51,963 . . . but now, I don't know, you're making me more nervous. Sit down. 526 00:34:52,131 --> 00:34:53,548 -Okay. -Tell me what happened. 527 00:34:53,716 --> 00:34:57,219 Yesterday, Jenna, she got into my house, Harry. 528 00:34:57,386 --> 00:34:59,346 She must have been broke, I don't know. 529 00:34:59,514 --> 00:35:02,974 She swiped 200 bucks, a credit card, California ID, God knows what else. 530 00:35:03,142 --> 00:35:05,060 -Right. -Oh, God. 531 00:35:05,228 --> 00:35:06,812 -No more lies, Harry. -No. 532 00:35:07,021 --> 00:35:08,563 No. 533 00:35:08,731 --> 00:35:10,607 Are you a detective? 534 00:35:13,361 --> 00:35:15,320 -Are you a detective? -Who told you that? 535 00:35:15,530 --> 00:35:18,198 Flicka. Flicka. You know, my friend? She told me. 536 00:35:18,366 --> 00:35:19,950 She told me you were a detective. 537 00:35:20,118 --> 00:35:22,536 -If you are, then I really need your help. -Well-- 538 00:35:22,703 --> 00:35:24,371 That's empty, honey. 539 00:35:24,580 --> 00:35:29,334 Okay, I know this sounds crazy, Harry, but listen. Okay. Okay. 540 00:35:29,544 --> 00:35:33,213 -My sister's been living out here. . . . -Harmony's sister, dead. What the hell? 541 00:35:33,381 --> 00:35:36,800 What was she even doing here? The lady in the lake, now the sister. 542 00:35:36,968 --> 00:35:40,345 This was two corpses in three hours. Am l crazy? That's unusual, right? 543 00:35:40,513 --> 00:35:43,140 Yeah, looking back, l maybe should've told her... 544 00:35:43,307 --> 00:35:45,267 ...l wasn't really a nipple-- Detective. 545 00:35:45,476 --> 00:35:49,020 Detective. Sorry. l should've said something, but she wouldn't shut up. 546 00:35:49,188 --> 00:35:51,398 The card she stole from me was maxed out. 547 00:35:51,566 --> 00:35:56,153 Right before she died, she charged over $2000 on it. That's weird, isn't it? 548 00:35:56,362 --> 00:36:00,240 Sentron something. Some bullshit company! Plus-- 549 00:36:00,449 --> 00:36:03,785 Red flag, Harry. She took her birth control pill for the day. 550 00:36:03,995 --> 00:36:06,121 Why would she even bother with the pill, huh? 551 00:36:06,289 --> 00:36:09,332 She was murdered, Harry. She was murdered. She was murdered. 552 00:36:09,500 --> 00:36:12,127 Honey, all right. Relax, relax, relax. Okay, relax. 553 00:36:12,295 --> 00:36:13,962 Are you gonna help me, Harry? 554 00:36:14,172 --> 00:36:17,007 -I gotta check my schedule-- -If you're not gonna help me. . . 555 00:36:17,175 --> 00:36:20,051 . . . I need to get out of here, find someone that'll help me. 556 00:36:20,219 --> 00:36:22,596 -I just gotta check my schedule. -Can you help me? 557 00:36:22,763 --> 00:36:25,432 If you're not gonna help me, I need to find somebody else! 558 00:36:25,600 --> 00:36:28,518 -My caseload is pretty-- -Oh, Harry, thank you. 559 00:36:57,757 --> 00:37:00,008 Yuck, come on. 560 00:37:12,021 --> 00:37:14,856 -It was nothing. I didn't do anything. -What are you doing? 561 00:37:15,024 --> 00:37:17,442 -I didn't do anything. -You were grabbing my tit. 562 00:37:17,610 --> 00:37:20,153 No, there was a spider. There was a big spider. 563 00:37:20,321 --> 00:37:22,906 -Oh, please, whatever. -I swear to God. 564 00:37:23,115 --> 00:37:27,994 Look, I'll find it. I'll find the thing. Where are you? Fuzzy little bitch. 565 00:37:28,204 --> 00:37:31,623 -Whatever. It's okay, I believe you. -Clearly, you don't. 566 00:37:31,874 --> 00:37:35,210 Look, Harry, you grabbed my tit. It's life, all right? It's no biggie. 567 00:37:36,879 --> 00:37:41,007 No biggie? Guy grabs your tit, "That's life, no biggie"? 568 00:37:41,217 --> 00:37:44,261 I mean, what kind of talk is that? 569 00:37:44,428 --> 00:37:47,806 No, you tell me. What kind of talk is that? I can't believe you. 570 00:37:47,974 --> 00:37:50,976 I can't believe that that's the reaction that-- 571 00:37:55,815 --> 00:37:57,232 See there? 572 00:37:57,525 --> 00:37:59,067 Yeah. 573 00:37:59,277 --> 00:38:02,904 -I trust you. -Right. 574 00:38:03,114 --> 00:38:06,783 What is your problem? I'm letting you off the hook. You didn't do anything. 575 00:38:06,951 --> 00:38:08,535 No, but you thought I did. 576 00:38:08,744 --> 00:38:12,122 Do you get it? I'm on the hook. The hook is my home. Do you understand? 577 00:38:12,498 --> 00:38:16,751 Listen to me. I grab your tit, it's a fucking biggie! 578 00:38:16,919 --> 00:38:19,212 That came out wrong. But what I'm saying is. . . 579 00:38:19,380 --> 00:38:23,425 . . .you act like, "Oops, it's an okay lapse. You know, everybody does it." 580 00:38:24,176 --> 00:38:26,553 What the fuck kind of guys you hang out with here? 581 00:38:26,762 --> 00:38:29,431 I mean, are you the kind of girl who like, you know. . .? 582 00:38:29,598 --> 00:38:31,599 Who what, Harry? 583 00:38:32,852 --> 00:38:34,519 Who what? 584 00:38:36,814 --> 00:38:38,565 Forget it. 585 00:38:39,108 --> 00:38:41,526 I'm sorry, just relax. Just get some rest, okay? 586 00:38:41,694 --> 00:38:45,905 Okay, we'll start on your case tomorrow. All right? 587 00:38:46,073 --> 00:38:47,949 -Afternoon good? -Whatever, Harry. 588 00:38:48,117 --> 00:38:49,451 -I'm going. -Okay. 589 00:38:49,618 --> 00:38:52,996 -I'm taking some sweats, all right? -Yeah, anything you want to borrow. 590 00:38:53,164 --> 00:38:56,207 -I'll give them back. -Yeah. Yeah, anything in the drawer. 591 00:38:56,375 --> 00:38:58,335 If it's in the drawer, it's clean. 592 00:38:59,712 --> 00:39:01,046 Night, Harry. 593 00:39:03,883 --> 00:39:05,383 Harry? 594 00:39:06,719 --> 00:39:08,511 This is. . . . 595 00:39:08,679 --> 00:39:11,723 -This is really great. -Isn't it? 596 00:39:11,891 --> 00:39:15,226 -I'm leaving. -Yeah, some nice rest. 597 00:39:15,394 --> 00:39:16,728 Bye. 598 00:39:17,271 --> 00:39:19,397 Fuck oftf--! 599 00:39:19,899 --> 00:39:22,484 Say again? They gave her back? 600 00:39:22,693 --> 00:39:25,612 Yes. She's in my shower. I'm looking at her, for chrissake. 601 00:39:25,780 --> 00:39:27,906 That's impossible. They don't even know you. 602 00:39:28,074 --> 00:39:32,869 You're right. The body can't be here. This is all a dream. There's Elmo the elf. 603 00:39:33,037 --> 00:39:35,163 -Shut up. How did they get in? -I don't know. 604 00:39:35,331 --> 00:39:37,499 How am I supposed to know? Fire escape, maybe. 605 00:39:37,708 --> 00:39:41,461 Okay, first things first. We gotta move her somewhere. You got gloves? 606 00:39:41,629 --> 00:39:43,505 -Excuse me? -Gloves. Do you have gloves? 607 00:39:43,672 --> 00:39:47,759 You have to move her. If it's a frame-up, some asshole's calling the cops on you. 608 00:39:47,927 --> 00:39:50,762 Do this: Wrap up the body in a blanket, a sheet, anything. 609 00:39:50,930 --> 00:39:54,182 -Okay, any particular kind of gloves? -Yes, fawn. 610 00:39:54,392 --> 00:39:55,850 Will you fucking hurry? 611 00:39:56,018 --> 00:39:57,352 -Perry? -Yeah? 612 00:39:57,520 --> 00:39:59,604 -I peed on it. -What? You peed on what? 613 00:39:59,814 --> 00:40:02,524 I peed on the corpse. Can they do, like, an ID from that? 614 00:40:02,691 --> 00:40:05,568 -I'm sorry, you peed on--? -On the corpse. My question is-- 615 00:40:05,778 --> 00:40:07,445 No, my question. I get to go first. 616 00:40:07,613 --> 00:40:09,989 Why in poo-perfect hell would you pee on a corpse? 617 00:40:10,199 --> 00:40:11,991 It's not like I did it for kicks. 618 00:40:12,159 --> 00:40:14,911 You said this doesn't happen. This is your fault! 619 00:40:15,079 --> 00:40:18,331 Shut up and listen. First, we have to wrap the body. 620 00:40:18,499 --> 00:40:20,291 Second, you've got to find the gun. 621 00:40:20,501 --> 00:40:23,336 -Say this with me, "Find the gun." -Find the gun. 622 00:40:23,546 --> 00:40:25,213 Damn it, I threw it in the lake. 623 00:40:25,423 --> 00:40:28,591 Not my gun, idiot. They dropped the body on you, it's a frame-up. 624 00:40:28,759 --> 00:40:31,469 Then they also have planted a gun, trust me. Move it. 625 00:40:31,637 --> 00:40:33,972 I'll be there in four minutes. 626 00:40:52,283 --> 00:40:58,538 Caller specified room 71 4, some sort of brawl or something. Violent. 627 00:40:58,706 --> 00:41:01,833 Yeah, 71 4. Lockhart. 628 00:41:02,001 --> 00:41:05,587 -Let me get you the key. -Actually, it's not 71 4, it's 51 4. 629 00:41:05,754 --> 00:41:08,173 I was just up there, and it's really noisy. 630 00:41:08,340 --> 00:41:11,384 -Let's get the key. -Yep, pretty awful. 631 00:41:22,688 --> 00:41:25,231 -Don't answer that. -Yeah, duh. 632 00:41:25,691 --> 00:41:27,609 -That it? -No, that's the corpse. . . 633 00:41:27,776 --> 00:41:29,694 . . .from the last guy who stayed here. 634 00:41:29,862 --> 00:41:31,196 Fuck off. Was there a gun? 635 00:41:31,363 --> 00:41:34,365 Yeah, it's right here. Perry, sons of bitches made us, made me. 636 00:41:34,533 --> 00:41:37,702 I'm in town for two days, they know who I am and where to find me. 637 00:41:37,870 --> 00:41:41,706 -That's impossible. -Yeah, it's totally nuts. Back stairway. 638 00:41:43,334 --> 00:41:46,878 I forgot to tell you, Harmony's alive. She thinks her sister was murdered. 639 00:41:47,046 --> 00:41:48,880 -Come again? -Never mind. 640 00:42:04,647 --> 00:42:07,649 See, these dudes tonight, they see two assholes out of nowhere. 641 00:42:07,816 --> 00:42:10,235 -What do they think? -They think we know something. 642 00:42:10,444 --> 00:42:13,655 They panic. They got a body, they've gotta dispose of the evidence. 643 00:42:13,822 --> 00:42:15,740 In my shower? Come on, you said real life. 644 00:42:15,908 --> 00:42:20,245 -They were setting you up, dummy. -They're not setting me up. Shut up. 645 00:42:20,412 --> 00:42:22,664 You change your tune every five minutes. 646 00:42:22,831 --> 00:42:25,124 -Kiss me. -What? No, no, no. 647 00:42:28,629 --> 00:42:31,756 Check out Doris and Lucinda over here. 648 00:42:39,515 --> 00:42:40,848 These lessons suck. 649 00:42:41,058 --> 00:42:44,269 I quit. This is not being a detective. Corpses floating in lakes. . . 650 00:42:44,436 --> 00:42:48,481 . . . people kissing people. This is wrong. This is every shade of wrong. 651 00:42:48,649 --> 00:42:50,817 Somebody wanna fill me in? 652 00:42:52,111 --> 00:42:54,404 She thinks I'm a detective, so go along with it. 653 00:42:54,572 --> 00:42:55,989 -What? -Don't fuck me up. 654 00:42:56,532 --> 00:42:58,658 Hey. 655 00:42:58,867 --> 00:43:01,744 Do you know the cops are looking for you, Harry? 656 00:43:01,912 --> 00:43:03,246 -They are? -Yeah. 657 00:43:03,414 --> 00:43:06,416 I sent them to the wrong room. I didn't know what else to do. 658 00:43:06,625 --> 00:43:09,127 You did fine. Perry and I, we're just-- 659 00:43:09,336 --> 00:43:11,879 -Hiya, Perry. -We're just running, you know, a game. 660 00:43:12,047 --> 00:43:13,756 Perry, what do you call it? 661 00:43:13,924 --> 00:43:18,303 The old Bring Them In and Push Them Out. That's what we're doing. 662 00:43:18,470 --> 00:43:19,804 What's going on? 663 00:43:19,972 --> 00:43:22,890 Why are you and Perry nacking on each other? 664 00:43:26,604 --> 00:43:30,273 l sent her home believing, A, we'd meet tomorrow to go over her case... 665 00:43:30,441 --> 00:43:32,609 ...and, B, l wasn't actually gay. 666 00:43:32,818 --> 00:43:35,111 Do not ask me how l did B. 667 00:43:35,529 --> 00:43:37,405 Why didn't we just leave it there? 668 00:43:37,573 --> 00:43:39,866 Think, dummy. A 91 1 call from your hotel room. . . 669 00:43:40,034 --> 00:43:42,702 . . .all of a sudden, there's a corpse outside? Bad idea. 670 00:43:42,870 --> 00:43:46,331 Speaking of bad ideas, what's this about you taking on your own case? 671 00:43:46,498 --> 00:43:48,625 Of all the dipshit things to do. 672 00:43:48,792 --> 00:43:50,335 Killed herself, by the way. 673 00:43:50,544 --> 00:43:52,545 Killed herself. I solved your case for you. 674 00:43:52,713 --> 00:43:55,715 -Harmony's convinced-- -I don't care about-- Listen to me. 675 00:43:55,883 --> 00:43:59,177 -Little sis punched her own ticket. -Okay. Gotcha. 676 00:43:59,345 --> 00:44:02,680 All right, this looks good up ahead. Time to lose the luggage. 677 00:44:10,564 --> 00:44:12,273 Sorry, sweetheart. 678 00:44:12,441 --> 00:44:14,400 You deserved better. 679 00:44:25,329 --> 00:44:27,330 Before I left, I got her into foster care. 680 00:44:27,498 --> 00:44:31,167 I've never told you just how awful he treated her. My dad, I'm talking about. 681 00:44:31,335 --> 00:44:34,253 I'll tell you what, I take notes, in general. . . 682 00:44:34,421 --> 00:44:39,008 . . .so if you're just real specific, thorough and precise, that'll help. 683 00:44:39,218 --> 00:44:42,178 I remember only lying to her one time. 684 00:44:42,346 --> 00:44:43,763 I said to her: 685 00:44:43,972 --> 00:44:47,016 "Maybe the man who is living here is not your father." 686 00:44:47,226 --> 00:44:49,936 You told your sister she was adopted, yeah? 687 00:44:50,896 --> 00:44:52,355 No, I did one better. 688 00:44:52,523 --> 00:44:54,565 I told her her real father was an actor. . . 689 00:44:54,733 --> 00:44:57,276 . . .who was in the movie that came through town. 690 00:44:57,444 --> 00:45:00,196 -Jonny Gossamer-- -Jonny Gossamer movie. That's right. 691 00:45:00,948 --> 00:45:03,282 I told Jenna one day she'd go to Hollywood. . . 692 00:45:03,450 --> 00:45:06,327 . . .and she'd meet her famous, real father. 693 00:45:19,216 --> 00:45:22,176 She believed me, Harry, and she came out here looking for him. 694 00:45:22,344 --> 00:45:25,555 Okay, this is a bunch. I can start my. . . 695 00:45:25,889 --> 00:45:28,182 -. . . process, I guess. -Thank you. 696 00:45:28,392 --> 00:45:31,310 I'm on the case. Here is my card. 697 00:45:33,021 --> 00:45:35,732 -It's a magic card, so. . . . -Wow, "the Amazing Harold." 698 00:45:35,941 --> 00:45:38,985 -Just say "abracadabra." -What happened, somebody sue you? 699 00:45:39,570 --> 00:45:42,071 It used to be "alakazam" when you cut me in half. 700 00:45:42,239 --> 00:45:44,866 And, not to be picky, but it was "Harold the Great." 701 00:45:45,033 --> 00:45:48,703 No, I used to be great, now I'm amazing. Get with it. 702 00:45:50,122 --> 00:45:52,373 Hi, it's me. You hear anything? 703 00:45:52,583 --> 00:45:54,500 No, there's nothing in the papers, so. . . . 704 00:45:54,668 --> 00:45:57,336 I'm busy working on Harmony's case. 705 00:45:57,546 --> 00:45:58,921 What case? Leave her alone. 706 00:45:59,131 --> 00:46:02,341 News on Channel 5, just starting. Call me after. 707 00:46:03,177 --> 00:46:06,053 --a kidnapping gone wrong. lt is unclear why his daughter... 708 00:46:06,221 --> 00:46:08,139 ...was subsequently murdered or where. . . 709 00:46:08,348 --> 00:46:12,059 ...for she was almost certainly killed and then moved, police sources say. 710 00:46:12,227 --> 00:46:15,062 Veronica Dexter was reported missing yesterday afternoon... 711 00:46:15,230 --> 00:46:17,940 ...when she failed to greet her boyfriend at the airport. 712 00:46:18,108 --> 00:46:21,319 Miss Dexter recently made headlines when she returned from Paris. . . 713 00:46:21,487 --> 00:46:24,822 . . .and withdrew her multimillion-dollar lawsuit against her father... 714 00:46:24,990 --> 00:46:27,700 ...actor-turned-entrepreneur Harlan Dexter. 715 00:46:27,868 --> 00:46:30,036 Mr. Dexter owns the prestigious Dexter Clinic. 716 00:46:30,204 --> 00:46:33,790 His wife died last spring, prompting Veronica's return to the U.S... 717 00:46:33,957 --> 00:46:37,752 ...and a father-daughter reconciliation following years of estrangement. 718 00:46:37,961 --> 00:46:42,215 Veronica Dexter, 25 years old yesterday. Paul. 719 00:46:42,758 --> 00:46:44,759 We were just at that party. Are you telling me. . . 720 00:46:44,927 --> 00:46:47,553 . . .that the girl in the lake, that was Veronica Dexter? 721 00:46:47,721 --> 00:46:49,514 Positive ID, scars, dental records. 722 00:46:49,681 --> 00:46:52,308 -You talked to your police guy? -Yeah, not much there. 723 00:46:52,476 --> 00:46:55,353 The lab report came back, no sign of rape. 724 00:46:55,854 --> 00:46:57,230 Boils down to this: 725 00:46:57,397 --> 00:47:01,359 Veronica Dexter, yesterday afternoon about 4:30, left her home. 726 00:47:01,527 --> 00:47:05,238 Went off to the airport, pick up some dude, old boyfriend. Off she went. 727 00:47:05,405 --> 00:47:08,991 -That was the last anybody saw of her? -With a symmetrical, ungooshed head. 728 00:47:09,159 --> 00:47:10,660 Police ever find the car? 729 00:47:10,828 --> 00:47:12,954 No, genius, that was us. Remember? 730 00:47:13,163 --> 00:47:14,622 Oh, yeah, right. 731 00:47:15,082 --> 00:47:17,667 -The killers were at the party, Harry. -They were? 732 00:47:17,835 --> 00:47:21,045 -The killers were at Dexter's? -That's how they recognized you. 733 00:47:21,255 --> 00:47:24,423 It's getting too scary. You gotta bail. Get a flight out, today. 734 00:47:24,591 --> 00:47:27,718 But I got my screen test Tuesday. I'll go Wednesday. 735 00:47:27,886 --> 00:47:30,763 -You're not getting the part. -Fuck oftf. Don't be a schmuck. 736 00:47:30,973 --> 00:47:33,683 -I know it's a long shot. -You're not gonna get the part. 737 00:47:33,851 --> 00:47:36,435 You're not listening to me. You won't get the-- Harry! 738 00:47:36,603 --> 00:47:41,357 You're not gonna get the part, okay? Colin Farrell wants too much money. 739 00:47:41,525 --> 00:47:43,067 Do you get me now? 740 00:47:43,902 --> 00:47:47,488 Dabney, he unearths a discovery. New kid, works for cheap. 741 00:47:47,698 --> 00:47:50,116 Flies him out here, high profile, parties. . . 742 00:47:50,325 --> 00:47:53,327 . . .screen tests, detective lessons, all of it. 743 00:47:53,537 --> 00:47:54,871 You were just being used. 744 00:47:55,038 --> 00:47:57,707 Shave a couple million off of Colin Farrell's price tag. 745 00:47:59,626 --> 00:48:01,919 Sorry, chief. There it is. 746 00:48:02,629 --> 00:48:04,213 I'm not gonna lie to you anymore. 747 00:48:06,675 --> 00:48:09,802 I understand if you wanna take a swing at me. You fuck! 748 00:48:10,012 --> 00:48:11,721 You sissy bitch ! 749 00:48:11,930 --> 00:48:13,264 Stop. 750 00:48:13,432 --> 00:48:15,558 Don't bother asking Harmony out on your date. 751 00:48:15,726 --> 00:48:20,563 She wasn't very happy to find out that you're not a detective, that you lied. 752 00:48:20,731 --> 00:48:22,607 -You told her? -Pick those up. 753 00:48:22,816 --> 00:48:24,442 Pick them up. 754 00:48:25,569 --> 00:48:27,987 Why did you tell her? You didn't have to tell her. 755 00:48:28,196 --> 00:48:31,157 -I am an idiot. I thought we were friends. -We're not friends. 756 00:48:31,325 --> 00:48:34,744 -I was in trouble, you were there for me. -No, I was-- Stop speaking. 757 00:48:34,953 --> 00:48:37,705 I was there protecting my employer, Dabney. Hello. 758 00:48:37,915 --> 00:48:40,082 He pays me to insulate him from corpses. 759 00:48:45,797 --> 00:48:48,299 I'm not a nice man, Harry. 760 00:48:48,467 --> 00:48:50,927 Go home before something bad happens to you. 761 00:48:51,136 --> 00:48:53,471 -What, are you threatening me? -No, moron. 762 00:48:53,639 --> 00:48:56,223 Go home before the bad guys do something bad to you. 763 00:48:56,391 --> 00:48:58,309 Right, I get it. Fine. 764 00:48:59,311 --> 00:49:01,228 Merry Christmas. Sorry I fucked you over. 765 00:49:01,396 --> 00:49:04,565 No problem. Don't quit your gay job. 766 00:49:16,870 --> 00:49:19,997 Arriving passengers from flight number 758 from Denver... 767 00:49:20,207 --> 00:49:22,750 ...may retrieve their baggage at carousel two. 768 00:49:27,714 --> 00:49:30,800 Hey, Flicka. Hey, it's me, Harry. 769 00:49:30,968 --> 00:49:33,094 Remember me? What's up, honey? How are you? 770 00:49:33,261 --> 00:49:35,805 -She doesn't want to talk to you. -Oh, no, no. I know. 771 00:49:35,973 --> 00:49:38,474 Did you ever think maybe I don't want to talk to her? 772 00:49:38,642 --> 00:49:40,935 I just saw your really distinctive ears. 773 00:49:41,103 --> 00:49:43,312 You look different, but it's obviously Flicka. 774 00:49:43,480 --> 00:49:45,815 -Maybe it's you I'm interested in. -Is that true? 775 00:49:45,983 --> 00:49:48,943 Not really. Look, she must have a cell phone, right? She must. 776 00:49:49,111 --> 00:49:52,697 -Forget it. This is between you two. -Look, I got a ticket. I am leaving. 777 00:49:52,864 --> 00:49:55,658 I'm going back to the East Coast, and that's-- 778 00:49:55,826 --> 00:49:58,619 No? Come on, I just want to say something to her. 779 00:49:58,787 --> 00:50:02,581 Just anything before I split. I'm begging you. Come on, help me out. 780 00:50:02,749 --> 00:50:04,750 -I'm gonna regret this. -No, you're not. . . 781 00:50:04,918 --> 00:50:07,586 . . .and that is a very smart suit, by the way. 782 00:50:09,673 --> 00:50:12,174 -It's not here, that's funny. -What's funny? 783 00:50:12,384 --> 00:50:14,260 Nothing. It's just under her stage name. 784 00:50:14,428 --> 00:50:17,847 Oh, God. Everyone's got a stage name. What's her stage name? 785 00:50:18,015 --> 00:50:20,808 Ames. Allison Ames. 786 00:50:20,976 --> 00:50:23,185 Okay, well, I'll just write it down and then-- 787 00:50:23,353 --> 00:50:25,479 Hey! Say that name again. 788 00:50:25,689 --> 00:50:28,691 -Allison Ames. -Allison Ames. A-M-E-S. 789 00:50:28,859 --> 00:50:30,901 -That's her stage name. -I just said that. 790 00:50:31,069 --> 00:50:32,778 That's the name on her credit cards. 791 00:50:32,946 --> 00:50:36,574 -How am I supposed to know? -Fuck! Thanks, honey. Gotta roll. 792 00:50:36,742 --> 00:50:38,409 Later. 793 00:50:38,869 --> 00:50:43,372 You have reached the offices of Sentron, lnc. Leave a message. 794 00:50:43,915 --> 00:50:46,876 Newsflash, Perry. Your client, Ames, it was the little sister. 795 00:50:47,044 --> 00:50:48,794 Repeat, the little sister. 796 00:50:48,962 --> 00:50:50,880 That's where Harmony's 2 grand went. 797 00:50:51,048 --> 00:50:53,257 It's in your bank, you overpriced bastard. 798 00:50:53,425 --> 00:50:55,176 Her kid sister hired you. 799 00:50:55,343 --> 00:51:00,973 Do you get this? Your case and my case are the same fucking case. 800 00:51:01,516 --> 00:51:03,684 -Come on ! -Get out of my life! 801 00:51:03,894 --> 00:51:07,563 I'm at the airport, right, and I run into Flicka, and she says-- 802 00:51:08,774 --> 00:51:11,233 -Did I just cut off your finger? -Yeah. 803 00:51:11,401 --> 00:51:16,030 It's on the floor, to my periph-- I don't wanna see it. Pick it up, put it on ice. 804 00:51:16,323 --> 00:51:17,865 Thanks. 805 00:51:23,830 --> 00:51:25,706 You're a genius, Harry. You're a genius. 806 00:51:25,874 --> 00:51:29,251 Oh, my God, l'm so sorry l had to bail on you, but l had to go to work. 807 00:51:29,419 --> 00:51:32,046 l am going nuts here. l can't stop thinking about this. 808 00:51:32,214 --> 00:51:34,840 What's my sister's connection to Veronica Dexter? 809 00:51:35,008 --> 00:51:38,803 She predicted that murder, Harry. She sent you and Perry to that exact spot. 810 00:51:38,970 --> 00:51:43,099 That whole thing is wild. You know what else is nuts? You cut off my finger! 811 00:51:43,308 --> 00:51:47,353 Oh, God, Harry, I am so sorry about that. How is it? 812 00:51:47,562 --> 00:51:50,272 It's fine. It's all shut up. They gave me painkillers. 813 00:51:50,440 --> 00:51:53,275 -Where's Perry? We gotta find him. -Perry's coming by here. 814 00:51:53,485 --> 00:51:55,194 I'm working a party on Sunset Plaza. 815 00:51:55,362 --> 00:51:58,697 Remember you said the killer may have been at Dexter's party? 816 00:51:58,865 --> 00:52:02,868 -Well, that whole bunch is here tonight. -Honey, put me on the list, I'll drop by. 817 00:52:03,036 --> 00:52:07,331 I'll see if I can stir up the kettle, stick out my hat, see if anyone shoots at it. 818 00:52:07,499 --> 00:52:09,583 Maybe you could put the hat in the kettle. . . 819 00:52:09,751 --> 00:52:13,504 . . .and if they shoot at it, it'll ricochet. Harry, you sound trashed. 820 00:52:13,672 --> 00:52:15,464 Give me the address. I'm coming. 821 00:52:17,884 --> 00:52:20,219 l showed up mildly whacked on Demerol. . . 822 00:52:20,387 --> 00:52:23,180 ...thinking Harmony's theory wasn't so crazy. 823 00:52:23,348 --> 00:52:24,682 Hi. 824 00:52:24,850 --> 00:52:27,685 What if little sis had been murdered by the same assholes... 825 00:52:27,853 --> 00:52:29,311 . . .who offed Veronica Dexter? 826 00:52:29,479 --> 00:52:31,522 Remember? With the ski masks, those dudes. 827 00:52:31,690 --> 00:52:33,440 Then and there, I made a decision. 828 00:52:33,608 --> 00:52:36,902 lf it fucking killed me, l would not stop... 829 00:52:37,112 --> 00:52:39,655 ...until l got, like, two more Demerol. 830 00:52:39,823 --> 00:52:44,827 No, seriously, l was on the case. Harry Lockhart, L.A.P.l. 831 00:53:03,513 --> 00:53:05,139 -I got it. -What do you got? 832 00:53:05,307 --> 00:53:08,392 Just now. My friend Tiff does the video dubbing at Fox. 833 00:53:09,936 --> 00:53:13,022 -" Lord of the Cock Rings." -No, Harry, it's a fake label. 834 00:53:13,190 --> 00:53:16,775 Copyright infringement, she'd get fired. It's a Jonny Gossamer movie. 835 00:53:16,943 --> 00:53:21,071 If Jenna was hunting her mystery dad, this is where she would start, right? 836 00:53:21,239 --> 00:53:23,199 -Jesus, don't patronize me! -I'm not. 837 00:53:23,366 --> 00:53:27,077 -You're patronizing me. -No, I'm not. It's just a funny little buzz. 838 00:53:27,287 --> 00:53:29,788 I don't know if this guy's your boyfriend or not. . . 839 00:53:29,956 --> 00:53:32,875 . . . but when you were in the bathroom, he was checking me out. 840 00:53:33,084 --> 00:53:37,379 What? What is it out here with these women? 841 00:53:37,547 --> 00:53:39,924 Please, they're no different from anywhere else. 842 00:53:40,091 --> 00:53:43,886 They are. These are damaged goods, every one of them, from way back. 843 00:53:44,095 --> 00:53:47,431 Take a guy who sleeps with 1 00 women a year, go into his childhood. . . 844 00:53:47,599 --> 00:53:50,226 . . .dollars to doughnuts, it's relatively unspectacular. 845 00:53:50,393 --> 00:53:53,854 Now, you take one of these gals who sleeps with 1 00 guys a year. . . 846 00:53:54,022 --> 00:53:56,649 . . .and I bet you if you look in their childhood. . . 847 00:53:56,816 --> 00:53:58,859 . . .there's something rotten in Denver. 848 00:53:59,027 --> 00:54:01,111 -Denmark. -That too. But it's abandonment. . . 849 00:54:01,279 --> 00:54:04,240 . . . it's abuse. It's, "My uncle put his ping-ping in my papa." 850 00:54:04,407 --> 00:54:05,741 Then they all come out here. 851 00:54:05,909 --> 00:54:08,953 It's like someone took America by the East Coast and shook it. . . 852 00:54:09,120 --> 00:54:11,330 . . .and all the normal girls managed to hang on. 853 00:54:11,498 --> 00:54:15,417 Okay, everybody who hates Harry here raise their hand. 854 00:54:16,544 --> 00:54:20,381 -See that? Obedient little bitches too. -Fuck you ! 855 00:54:20,590 --> 00:54:22,007 Hey. 856 00:54:22,175 --> 00:54:25,803 Okay, you've got 30 of my fucking seconds, thrill me. 857 00:54:27,806 --> 00:54:29,139 All right, guys, cast list. 858 00:54:29,307 --> 00:54:32,017 Catch. That's the credit card my sister used to hire you. 859 00:54:33,436 --> 00:54:35,437 So who's in this cinematic milestone? 860 00:54:35,605 --> 00:54:40,442 -We got a Michael Beck, whoever that is. -He's the star of Xanadu, with. . . 861 00:54:40,610 --> 00:54:43,070 -. . .Olivia Newton-John and Gene Kelly. -Gay. 862 00:54:44,197 --> 00:54:45,531 -What? -Nothing. 863 00:54:45,699 --> 00:54:49,034 Perry, listen up. I know this is a long shot, but indulge me, please. 864 00:54:49,202 --> 00:54:51,578 We gotta lose the hat. I'm sorry, honey, I can't-- 865 00:54:51,746 --> 00:54:53,998 -God, I'm working ! -I know, but just forget it. 866 00:54:54,165 --> 00:54:57,918 Seriously, don't jump all over me. Just pay attention. Watch it, please. 867 00:54:58,086 --> 00:54:59,545 -That's Harlan Dexter. -What? 868 00:54:59,713 --> 00:55:01,964 -Who's Har--? What? -Look, that's-- 869 00:55:02,173 --> 00:55:04,800 He's 20 years younger, but that's Harlan Dexter. 870 00:55:04,968 --> 00:55:07,219 Always sees the inside of a police van. 871 00:55:08,930 --> 00:55:10,264 No way. 872 00:55:12,183 --> 00:55:15,311 This kind of makes sense. He had the Gossamer books at his house. 873 00:55:15,520 --> 00:55:16,854 Used to be an actor. 874 00:55:17,063 --> 00:55:20,482 I remember him now. 1 980. Oh, my God, I saw him like this. 875 00:55:20,692 --> 00:55:22,609 -Young. -Where? 876 00:55:22,819 --> 00:55:25,321 In Indiana. He was there with the movie crew. 877 00:55:25,488 --> 00:55:29,616 Remember, I told you he looked familiar. Oh, God, this can't be true. 878 00:55:30,118 --> 00:55:34,371 And your sister has to have seen this, so you know what it comes down to. 879 00:55:34,539 --> 00:55:37,374 You tell your sister a fairy tale about her real father-- 880 00:55:37,542 --> 00:55:41,086 And 20 years later, she comes out to L.A. hunting Harlan Dexter. 881 00:55:44,382 --> 00:55:47,176 I've got a surveillance in MacArthur Park. 882 00:55:47,344 --> 00:55:51,096 I gotta follow some chick around till midnight. Do not play detective. 883 00:55:51,264 --> 00:55:53,349 This is not a book. This is not a movie. 884 00:55:53,516 --> 00:55:55,309 We got it. Do you think I'm stupid? 885 00:55:55,477 --> 00:55:57,561 You wouldn't know where to feed yourself. . . 886 00:55:57,729 --> 00:56:02,649 . . . if you didn't flap your mouth so much. Yes, I think you're stupid. 887 00:56:03,568 --> 00:56:07,363 Harry, don't listen to a word he says, all right? We're getting somewhere. 888 00:56:07,572 --> 00:56:09,907 I'll call you tomorrow. I'm going back to work. 889 00:56:10,075 --> 00:56:11,075 Good. 890 00:56:27,759 --> 00:56:30,552 -Excuse me. -What's up, baby? How you feeling? 891 00:56:30,762 --> 00:56:33,430 -I'm just gonna-- -Come and take a walk. Walk with me. 892 00:56:33,598 --> 00:56:35,766 Great, this is fucking rich. 893 00:56:37,477 --> 00:56:40,145 Well, now, here we all are: 894 00:56:40,313 --> 00:56:44,191 -Ike, Mike and Mustard. -What the hell does that mean? 895 00:56:44,401 --> 00:56:47,236 I'm with him on this one. That's pretty fucking obscure. 896 00:56:47,404 --> 00:56:49,279 -I hear that all the time. -You do? 897 00:56:49,447 --> 00:56:51,657 -Yeah, sure. -Where? At the 1 942 Club? 898 00:56:51,825 --> 00:56:55,828 -Just because you didn't get it-- -Motherfucker, I could-- Slow your roll. 899 00:56:56,037 --> 00:56:59,331 This is bullshit. What will you do, take me out here? There's sec-- 900 00:56:59,541 --> 00:57:02,543 -Keep talking. Keep talking. -You wanna know who we are? 901 00:57:02,752 --> 00:57:05,504 I'm the frying pan, see? And my boy over here-- 902 00:57:05,672 --> 00:57:08,257 He's Mustard. I'm Mustard, baby. 903 00:57:08,466 --> 00:57:09,800 -Sure. -He's the fire. 904 00:57:10,009 --> 00:57:13,095 -Fuck you, Mr. Mustard. -Here we go. 905 00:57:13,304 --> 00:57:16,557 Now, me and my man, we're puzzled lately by your behavior, such as-- 906 00:57:16,724 --> 00:57:22,521 Such as why is a savvy, stand-up cat like yourself consorting with gay men? 907 00:57:23,815 --> 00:57:26,191 Frolicking in the lake together. What is that? 908 00:57:26,359 --> 00:57:28,610 You're the guys who were wearing the masks. 909 00:57:28,820 --> 00:57:32,072 -You don't ask the questions. -Don't ask questions. 910 00:57:32,240 --> 00:57:35,576 God, you just tore up my fucking finger! I just got this fixed. Jesus! 911 00:57:35,743 --> 00:57:38,662 I bet there's a doctor in New York, clear that shit right up. 912 00:57:38,830 --> 00:57:40,414 Clear it right up. 913 00:57:45,253 --> 00:57:48,046 L.A. don't want you no more, tough guy. 914 00:57:48,465 --> 00:57:50,132 All right? 915 00:57:51,718 --> 00:57:54,386 -How much further to the hospital? -Five minutes away. 916 00:57:54,554 --> 00:57:57,389 Talk to me. Our mascot, back in high school, who was it? 917 00:57:57,765 --> 00:57:59,808 Come on, Harry, stay with me. 918 00:58:01,519 --> 00:58:03,228 Whitey, the white knight. Whitey. 919 00:58:03,438 --> 00:58:05,647 I guess it's better than calling him "Knighty." 920 00:58:05,815 --> 00:58:09,485 Then it'd be Knighty Knight. Soon it'd be Toodles, and then Ta-Ta. 921 00:58:09,694 --> 00:58:13,280 -It's very emasculating. -Harry, that's them. Twelve o'clock. 922 00:58:13,865 --> 00:58:16,033 You said it's a black guy and a white guy? 923 00:58:16,242 --> 00:58:18,243 You're right. Get the plate, call the cops. 924 00:58:18,411 --> 00:58:21,455 -Let me find a pen. -No. Whatever. Watch the road. 925 00:58:21,664 --> 00:58:23,123 Are we slowing down? 926 00:58:23,291 --> 00:58:26,418 -No, I'm getting a pen. -Are you following them? Better not be. 927 00:58:26,628 --> 00:58:30,255 -Tell me you're not following them. -I'm taking you to the hospital. 928 00:58:30,423 --> 00:58:33,467 -Oh, shit. They're turning. -What? 929 00:58:33,676 --> 00:58:34,968 Holy shit. 930 00:58:36,387 --> 00:58:40,516 Perry's stakeout. It's a setup. They're going to MacArthur Park after Perry! 931 00:58:40,683 --> 00:58:43,685 Wait a second ! My finger's hanging off. We gotta move on this. 932 00:58:43,895 --> 00:58:46,563 We're gonna go save Perry, really quickly. 933 00:58:46,773 --> 00:58:48,357 Then we'll go fix your finger. 934 00:58:48,566 --> 00:58:52,194 It'll be like, "Hey, Perry, look out." Boom, back in the car. All right? 935 00:58:52,403 --> 00:58:55,322 -Cool? -Yeah. This is exhausting. 936 00:58:56,324 --> 00:58:59,034 Bingo. All right. All right, Harry. 937 00:58:59,244 --> 00:59:02,329 Twelve o'clock, that's them. One of them is on foot. 938 00:59:06,376 --> 00:59:11,004 God, Harry. Shit, if I leave the keys, can you take yourself to the hospital? 939 00:59:11,214 --> 00:59:12,798 -Oh, yeah, sure. -All right, good. 940 00:59:12,966 --> 00:59:15,342 -I got the gun you gave me. -You what? 941 01:00:12,317 --> 01:00:13,984 Perry! 942 01:00:15,612 --> 01:00:17,237 Now, where you going? 943 01:00:20,908 --> 01:00:23,076 No, no, no. Don't fight it. 944 01:00:24,162 --> 01:00:26,330 Let it happen, baby. 945 01:01:00,156 --> 01:01:01,990 Perry! 946 01:01:08,289 --> 01:01:11,416 Perry, watch out! Goddamn it, turn around ! 947 01:01:22,095 --> 01:01:23,970 Son of a bitch ! 948 01:01:31,729 --> 01:01:35,107 How about that, you fucking animals! Goddamn cocksuckers. 949 01:01:58,131 --> 01:02:00,132 -Perry. -Where the hell did you come from? 950 01:02:00,299 --> 01:02:02,509 -He got away. -It's okay. You did good. 951 01:02:02,677 --> 01:02:06,430 -I couldn't shoot him, Perry. Oh, God. -You did fine. You did fine. 952 01:02:06,597 --> 01:02:08,223 We gotta go now. 953 01:02:24,449 --> 01:02:26,074 Hello? 954 01:02:37,211 --> 01:02:39,004 Anyone home? 955 01:02:46,095 --> 01:02:47,763 Hello? 956 01:02:49,182 --> 01:02:54,102 Anyone home? I got an injury problem. Hello. 957 01:02:54,437 --> 01:02:57,689 All right, first things first. You've gotta ditch that car. 958 01:02:58,274 --> 01:03:00,233 I know, I know. I've-- 959 01:03:00,401 --> 01:03:04,654 I know you said that there was gonna be consequences, but fuck. 960 01:03:04,822 --> 01:03:06,823 I saw him shot to death. 961 01:03:06,991 --> 01:03:11,912 -I was scared. -Look, it's okay, yeah. 962 01:03:12,997 --> 01:03:16,666 We can absolutely talk about it, all right? 963 01:03:16,834 --> 01:03:19,211 Thank you. Thank you so much. 964 01:03:19,378 --> 01:03:22,047 It's nothing against your boss. I'm grateful. I just-- 965 01:03:22,215 --> 01:03:23,548 I spoke to him. 966 01:03:23,716 --> 01:03:26,551 You'll never have to go through anything like that again. 967 01:03:26,719 --> 01:03:28,470 I swear. 968 01:03:28,846 --> 01:03:30,931 Promise? 969 01:03:31,098 --> 01:03:32,641 Yep. 970 01:03:42,693 --> 01:03:47,405 Who are you? 971 01:03:49,242 --> 01:03:50,784 Who--? 972 01:04:34,412 --> 01:04:35,954 Well, hey. 973 01:04:39,125 --> 01:04:42,252 So you still here, huh, tough guy? 974 01:04:43,796 --> 01:04:45,463 Oh, you got a gun, I see. 975 01:04:47,133 --> 01:04:48,884 Well, damn, you are tough. 976 01:05:38,309 --> 01:05:40,143 Sorry. 977 01:05:53,532 --> 01:05:55,408 Fuck. 978 01:06:06,921 --> 01:06:08,922 Hey. Hey! 979 01:06:09,090 --> 01:06:10,215 Sit. 980 01:06:17,932 --> 01:06:19,933 -Yeah? What? -Where the hell are you? 981 01:06:20,142 --> 01:06:23,812 I'm with one of the kidnappers. One of them, anyhow. I shot him. He's dead. 982 01:06:23,980 --> 01:06:25,313 Come here, you fuck. 983 01:06:25,523 --> 01:06:27,607 Wipe the place clean and get out of there. 984 01:06:27,817 --> 01:06:29,317 I want to, but I can't. 985 01:06:29,527 --> 01:06:32,904 -So do it. -My fingerprint's here. The dog's got it. 986 01:06:33,072 --> 01:06:37,283 -No one's gonna dust the fucking dog. -He's got the finger, asshole. . . 987 01:06:37,451 --> 01:06:40,537 -. . .with the print part. -Get the finger, kill the dog, get out. 988 01:06:40,705 --> 01:06:42,747 Hang on. 989 01:06:42,915 --> 01:06:46,459 Shit. Well, I think. . . . 990 01:06:46,669 --> 01:06:48,712 I think we're safe. 991 01:06:49,296 --> 01:06:50,714 Harry? 992 01:06:51,549 --> 01:06:55,010 -Harry? -Hey, Perry, I shot a guy. 993 01:06:55,469 --> 01:06:57,887 I never did that before. 994 01:06:59,306 --> 01:07:01,057 Harry, listen-- 995 01:07:09,692 --> 01:07:12,652 --link to the items found in the Silver Lake home... 996 01:07:12,820 --> 01:07:15,405 ...to the kidnap-murder of socialite Veronica Dexter. 997 01:07:15,823 --> 01:07:18,241 Police theorize a falling out between the kidnappers... 998 01:07:18,409 --> 01:07:21,619 ...resulting in at least two deaths, and possibly a third tonight. 999 01:07:21,787 --> 01:07:24,956 So this evening, was it Jonny Gossamer enough for you? 1000 01:07:25,124 --> 01:07:28,710 To tell you the truth, Jonny Gossamer always has a way bigger ending. 1001 01:07:28,878 --> 01:07:31,379 There's always the part where the guy gets tortured. 1002 01:07:31,547 --> 01:07:35,467 Yeah, tortured, sure. Then he usually breaks free and shoots, like, 1 6 guys. 1003 01:07:35,676 --> 01:07:39,095 Yeah, 1 6 guys. It's always 1 6. That's funny. 1004 01:07:43,309 --> 01:07:47,562 So this thing, it's over, right? They say the kidnappers are all dead, so. . . . 1005 01:07:47,730 --> 01:07:50,315 Well, Harry, I'd be lying to you if I didn't say. . . 1006 01:07:50,483 --> 01:07:53,026 . . .that I still didn't have a few questions. 1007 01:07:53,194 --> 01:07:54,736 Harmony's sister. 1008 01:07:54,904 --> 01:07:58,156 If she stumbles on a murder plot, why hire me to film it? 1009 01:07:58,324 --> 01:08:01,367 -Why not simply go to the police? -Right. And I still think. . . 1010 01:08:01,535 --> 01:08:04,579 . . .this Veronica Dexter father-daughter business is wanky. 1011 01:08:04,747 --> 01:08:07,749 So the whole reconcilement thing? 1012 01:08:07,917 --> 01:08:09,626 "Reconciliation," idiot. 1013 01:08:09,794 --> 01:08:14,047 She comes back to the States, drops the lawsuit, moves in with her father. 1014 01:08:14,215 --> 01:08:17,050 -Suddenly they're inseparable? -So, what are you saying? 1015 01:08:17,259 --> 01:08:19,469 We're gonna, like, probe deeper? 1016 01:08:19,678 --> 01:08:21,304 -Absolutely not. -What? 1017 01:08:21,472 --> 01:08:23,723 What are you talking about? My sister paid you. 1018 01:08:23,933 --> 01:08:26,101 -What, you're gonna bail? -Harmony. . . 1019 01:08:26,268 --> 01:08:28,520 . . .do you want your sister's money back? Done. 1020 01:08:28,687 --> 01:08:31,189 In the meantime, back off. 1021 01:08:31,357 --> 01:08:33,233 Before you get me and Harry killed. 1022 01:08:47,456 --> 01:08:49,124 Pardon me. 1023 01:08:49,291 --> 01:08:51,459 Hey, I lucked out. They gave me the same room. 1024 01:08:51,627 --> 01:08:54,129 -Lucky you. -It's pretty good. You wanna come up? 1025 01:08:54,296 --> 01:08:57,173 No, I don't wanna come up. Why would I go up there? 1026 01:08:57,383 --> 01:09:00,260 -They cleaned it. -The car is coming. I'm going. Jesus. 1027 01:09:05,391 --> 01:09:06,933 You know what, Harry? Stop. 1028 01:09:08,227 --> 01:09:10,103 Why'd you lie to me? 1029 01:09:12,565 --> 01:09:16,025 It was an excuse to stay around you. So I think, in the realm of lies-- 1030 01:09:16,235 --> 01:09:17,902 You are such a dumb-ass. 1031 01:09:19,572 --> 01:09:23,032 -I am so not who you think I am, Harry. -And who would that be? 1032 01:09:23,200 --> 01:09:25,869 You think I'm-- You think I'm amazing. 1033 01:09:26,287 --> 01:09:28,580 You do. You think I'm so amazing. . . 1034 01:09:28,789 --> 01:09:30,832 . . . because that's who I told you I'd be. 1035 01:09:31,000 --> 01:09:32,584 Yeah, that was the game plan. 1036 01:09:32,793 --> 01:09:35,461 -You know what? It worked. -No one else thinks so. 1037 01:09:35,671 --> 01:09:38,965 -My opinion doesn't count? -No, it doesn't. 1038 01:09:39,175 --> 01:09:40,550 Because you're new here. 1039 01:09:40,718 --> 01:09:42,677 Look around, there's younger and better. 1040 01:09:42,887 --> 01:09:45,263 I don't want younger and better, I want you. 1041 01:09:45,472 --> 01:09:47,640 I'm such a moron. I'm sorry. You know what-- 1042 01:09:47,850 --> 01:09:50,852 -It doesn't matter, I'm going. Look, just-- -I'm such an idiot. 1043 01:09:54,315 --> 01:09:57,066 I steal shit. 1044 01:09:59,695 --> 01:10:01,821 -Come again? -That's what I do for a living. 1045 01:10:01,989 --> 01:10:03,740 I steal audio-visual components. 1046 01:10:03,908 --> 01:10:07,243 I steal. I robbed a house. I stole this watch. 1047 01:10:07,411 --> 01:10:11,289 It's a cool watch. It's got this little light thing. I stole this gum. . . 1048 01:10:11,498 --> 01:10:15,001 . . .from the lobby, because it was kind of a rush. 1049 01:10:15,211 --> 01:10:20,506 I've never finished anything that I've started my entire life. 1050 01:10:21,967 --> 01:10:24,802 Not school, not marriage, nothing. 1051 01:10:25,554 --> 01:10:28,932 And I have this thing where, like halfway in the middle, I just. . . 1052 01:10:29,099 --> 01:10:30,892 . . .and I cut and run. 1053 01:10:31,101 --> 01:10:34,062 Like the other night when you were all over me. . . 1054 01:10:34,230 --> 01:10:36,397 . . .and you gave up and just went for it with-- 1055 01:10:36,565 --> 01:10:40,235 Prime example. I switched to the ugly friend. Homely friend. She's not ugly. 1056 01:10:40,444 --> 01:10:42,654 She's homely. 1057 01:10:44,156 --> 01:10:47,450 Don't go. Please. 1058 01:10:47,618 --> 01:10:49,327 Not yet. 1059 01:10:49,495 --> 01:10:51,120 This isn't finished. 1060 01:10:59,880 --> 01:11:01,256 -Turn around. -Why? 1061 01:11:01,423 --> 01:11:04,133 -Just turn around. -What, my tag's out? 1062 01:11:04,301 --> 01:11:07,762 -This dump have a bar? -Yeah. 1063 01:11:08,055 --> 01:11:11,015 -Call me "Slick" from here on out. -That was such a good job. 1064 01:11:11,225 --> 01:11:13,059 You snagged a ton of gum. 1065 01:11:13,227 --> 01:11:16,354 -I mean, petty theft-- -Oh, Harry. 1066 01:11:16,522 --> 01:11:20,441 I really didn't need that last shot of tequila. 1067 01:11:20,609 --> 01:11:23,653 Oh, God. 1068 01:11:37,001 --> 01:11:39,377 I just had a weird thought. 1069 01:11:39,545 --> 01:11:43,214 Veronica Dexter. I saw the body up close. Hell, I carried the damn thing. 1070 01:11:43,382 --> 01:11:46,759 Both times, the dress was soaked through, so it was transparent. So-- 1071 01:11:46,927 --> 01:11:49,512 God, Harry, where are you going with this? 1072 01:11:49,722 --> 01:11:51,723 No, no, no. It's just-- 1073 01:11:52,391 --> 01:11:55,310 Perry said this chick was deep into the born-again bit. . . 1074 01:11:55,477 --> 01:12:00,690 . . .so it's probably nothing, but just if she had on underwear. . . 1075 01:12:01,442 --> 01:12:04,652 . . . I didn't see any. 1076 01:12:06,905 --> 01:12:10,325 -I guess I'm taking the couch. -Yeah. Thanks. 1077 01:12:10,492 --> 01:12:14,996 Or you can sleep here. But it would only be sleeping, Harry. 1078 01:12:16,999 --> 01:12:19,792 If that's gonna frustrate you. 1079 01:12:20,419 --> 01:12:22,295 Let's see. 1080 01:12:29,636 --> 01:12:32,055 Oh, Harry. 1081 01:12:33,682 --> 01:12:35,933 So long ago. 1082 01:12:38,270 --> 01:12:42,398 Didn't really turn out the way we hoped, did it? 1083 01:12:43,317 --> 01:12:49,322 I guess if I racked my brain, I could think of worse places to be. 1084 01:12:51,658 --> 01:12:55,495 -Is that so, Whitey? -Whitey? 1085 01:12:55,662 --> 01:12:57,830 -Calling me a knight? -Maybe, yeah. 1086 01:12:57,998 --> 01:13:01,042 Except for the boner. That's not too knightly. 1087 01:13:01,210 --> 01:13:04,379 The hell it isn't. Actually, it's nightly and most mornings. 1088 01:13:10,886 --> 01:13:12,804 Fuck it, I'm not a knight. I'm sorry. 1089 01:13:12,971 --> 01:13:15,473 I'm thinking-- I'm going nuts, so I think maybe. . . 1090 01:13:15,641 --> 01:13:17,934 -. . .the couch is good. -What? Stop. Harry. 1091 01:13:18,102 --> 01:13:20,144 Or I can keep drinking until it goes away. 1092 01:13:20,312 --> 01:13:22,772 Harry, seriously, if you're at all uncomfortable. . . 1093 01:13:22,940 --> 01:13:25,233 . . . I am more than happy to do something. 1094 01:13:25,442 --> 01:13:26,943 -For chrissake, no. -Why not? 1095 01:13:27,111 --> 01:13:30,238 I don't want you to offer it as-- Not, "It's a courtesy freebie." 1096 01:13:30,447 --> 01:13:32,490 -You're so anal. -I don't want the backup: 1097 01:13:32,658 --> 01:13:35,576 "Let me just give you a hand here". . . 1098 01:13:35,744 --> 01:13:41,165 . . .as a kind of, like, default backup thing. 1099 01:14:01,687 --> 01:14:04,897 You're gonna stop calling me. 1100 01:14:05,065 --> 01:14:06,899 No. You know, that's crazy. 1101 01:14:07,067 --> 01:14:08,901 I swear to God, this is it. 1102 01:14:09,111 --> 01:14:11,654 You are the dream girl. You always have been. 1103 01:14:11,822 --> 01:14:14,323 This is destiny. 1104 01:14:14,783 --> 01:14:16,659 Okay. 1105 01:14:21,915 --> 01:14:24,792 Before we do this. . . 1106 01:14:24,960 --> 01:14:27,753 . . . I have a little confession to make. 1107 01:14:28,630 --> 01:14:32,967 My best friend ! You said you were going to drop by his house, wave goodbye. 1108 01:14:33,177 --> 01:14:35,636 I was leaving for L.A. I was never gonna see him-- 1109 01:14:35,804 --> 01:14:37,472 -He looked sad. -He looked sad? 1110 01:14:37,639 --> 01:14:39,974 -Yes, he did. -You slept with Chook Chutney. 1111 01:14:40,184 --> 01:14:42,685 Fuck. For chrissake, Harry, it was forever ago. 1112 01:14:42,853 --> 01:14:45,021 Come on, I was a different person back then. 1113 01:14:45,230 --> 01:14:47,482 -You slept with Chook. Excuse me. -Come on. 1114 01:14:47,649 --> 01:14:49,609 -Watch your hand. -Harry! 1115 01:15:29,983 --> 01:15:33,736 -Yeah. -Harry, was she raped? 1116 01:15:35,030 --> 01:15:37,031 The Dexter girl, was she raped? 1117 01:15:38,033 --> 01:15:41,536 No, the ME's report showed no indication of rape stuff. 1118 01:15:41,703 --> 01:15:43,496 You slept with Chook Chutney. 1119 01:16:01,306 --> 01:16:05,226 Wake up. Harry, wake up. 1120 01:16:06,687 --> 01:16:09,021 -Get up. -What's up? 1121 01:16:09,189 --> 01:16:11,649 Harmony's in trouble. Get dressed. 1122 01:16:11,817 --> 01:16:13,442 Let's go. 1123 01:16:15,612 --> 01:16:18,906 Perry, it's me. Listen, this Veronica Dexter business stinks. 1124 01:16:19,074 --> 01:16:21,284 l'm gonna go check on something Harry said. 1125 01:16:21,451 --> 01:16:23,494 Call me. lf l'm right, you'll shit. 1126 01:16:24,121 --> 01:16:25,830 -What did you say to her? -Nothing. 1127 01:16:26,039 --> 01:16:29,083 -I don't get what's happening. -She solved this thing. 1128 01:16:29,251 --> 01:16:33,713 That sly little minx of yours has solved this case, and now I can't find her. 1129 01:16:33,880 --> 01:16:35,923 -You're worried. -You're not worried? 1130 01:16:36,091 --> 01:16:37,800 Of course. If you are, I should be. 1131 01:16:38,010 --> 01:16:39,802 Now, what did you say? Think. 1132 01:16:40,012 --> 01:16:42,930 -You said something about the case. -Yeah. Yeah. 1133 01:16:43,140 --> 01:16:44,807 What? 1134 01:16:50,731 --> 01:16:53,065 l tell him about destiny. He's shaking his head. 1135 01:16:53,233 --> 01:16:57,194 About dream girls, he doesn't care. l mention the underwear thing... 1136 01:16:57,362 --> 01:16:58,988 ...he has a fucking conniption. 1137 01:16:59,156 --> 01:17:01,198 And you? How about it, filmgoer? 1138 01:17:03,118 --> 01:17:05,828 Have you solved the case of the dead people in L.A.? 1139 01:17:05,996 --> 01:17:08,581 Times Square audiences, don't shout at the screen. 1140 01:17:08,749 --> 01:17:11,459 And stop picking at that, it'll just get worse. 1141 01:17:14,004 --> 01:17:16,964 -This won't take a second. -Right. 1142 01:17:29,811 --> 01:17:32,521 Hi. How are you doing tonight? 1143 01:17:32,689 --> 01:17:34,649 They gave away my crickets. 1144 01:17:38,779 --> 01:17:42,907 Excuse me, you wouldn't, by chance, happen to have seen this woman? 1145 01:17:43,075 --> 01:17:46,952 No. I don't like him. Kurt Cobain, he took my cricket. 1146 01:17:47,120 --> 01:17:48,537 Of course. That's sad. 1147 01:17:48,705 --> 01:17:52,041 Ma'am, I hope you won't be offended when I ask you. . . 1148 01:17:52,209 --> 01:17:55,670 . . . if you're wearing anything at all underneath your hospital blues. 1149 01:17:55,837 --> 01:17:59,507 Any undergarments. It's important. 1150 01:18:12,437 --> 01:18:14,980 That's the clue. Veronica Dexter was a patient here. 1151 01:18:15,148 --> 01:18:18,651 Private mental clinic, where even nice girls don't wear undies. 1152 01:18:18,860 --> 01:18:21,987 How could she be here and meanwhile, she's out having parties? 1153 01:18:22,155 --> 01:18:26,325 Think. First she hates her dad, then loves him. Has a lawsuit, withdraws it. Why? 1154 01:18:26,535 --> 01:18:28,828 -I'll tell you why. -Oh, my God. 1155 01:18:32,666 --> 01:18:35,126 Oh, my God. So it's two different girls, right? 1156 01:18:35,293 --> 01:18:38,838 He stashed his daughter in here, and then he put the ringer on the street. 1157 01:18:39,047 --> 01:18:42,174 He needs someone who looks like her to withdraw the complaint. 1158 01:18:42,676 --> 01:18:44,468 -It's been 1 0 years. -This is nuts. 1159 01:18:44,678 --> 01:18:47,054 -It's right out of a Gossamer book. -Of course. . . 1160 01:18:47,222 --> 01:18:50,099 . . . because the guy who planned the crimes has all the books. 1161 01:18:50,267 --> 01:18:54,812 He's read them all. They're in his house. Plus, he was in that piece of shit. . . 1162 01:18:54,980 --> 01:18:56,731 1163 01:18:57,691 --> 01:18:59,608 You're telling me the girl imposter-- 1164 01:18:59,818 --> 01:19:01,986 A desperate man needs a replacement daughter. 1165 01:19:02,154 --> 01:19:04,196 Along comes a girl, Harmony's sister. 1166 01:19:04,406 --> 01:19:08,117 -Fresh off the bus, looking for her dad. -I'd say I found my imposter. 1167 01:19:08,285 --> 01:19:10,453 Let's get out of here. 1168 01:19:12,372 --> 01:19:15,374 -So where did she go from here? -Shut up, I'm thinking. 1169 01:19:15,584 --> 01:19:17,042 By the way, this thing: 1170 01:19:17,210 --> 01:19:19,211 Single gayest thing you've ever done. 1171 01:19:19,421 --> 01:19:22,339 -Evening, gentlemen. -Hi, we are so incredibly lost. 1172 01:19:22,507 --> 01:19:24,175 Mr. Van Shrike, hello. 1173 01:19:24,384 --> 01:19:26,719 You look chilly. Come back inside. 1174 01:19:26,928 --> 01:19:29,430 I'm from back East. I'm kind of digging the cold. 1175 01:19:29,639 --> 01:19:33,434 -Fuck! He's the one who said it. -Or I can kill you here. 1176 01:19:37,230 --> 01:19:40,733 Harry, I was thinking some more about this reality versus fiction. 1177 01:19:40,901 --> 01:19:45,780 Like in the movies, when a guy sticks a gun at some schmuck's back and says: 1178 01:19:45,989 --> 01:19:49,116 -"Let's take a walk." He's got a hostage. -I've seen that movie. 1179 01:19:49,284 --> 01:19:52,787 In reality, the pros like about five feet of separation. 1180 01:19:52,954 --> 01:19:56,832 That's so the schmuck doesn't take the gun back and make him eat it. 1181 01:19:59,753 --> 01:20:02,254 Doesn't that suck? I just hit you for no reason. 1182 01:20:02,464 --> 01:20:04,673 Watch it. 1183 01:20:09,888 --> 01:20:12,556 -Tell us where Harmony is. -Fuck you, mary. 1184 01:20:12,724 --> 01:20:15,810 You don't get it, do you? This isn't "good cop, bad cop." 1185 01:20:16,019 --> 01:20:19,688 This is fag and New Yorker. You're in a lot of trouble. 1186 01:20:19,856 --> 01:20:24,401 For chrissake, who are you protecting? It's all over. Dexter is going down. 1187 01:20:24,611 --> 01:20:26,862 -Down. -I know about Veronica's lawsuit. 1188 01:20:27,072 --> 01:20:30,324 I know Dexter was facing ruin. I even know he switched daughters. 1189 01:20:30,492 --> 01:20:33,828 Which, for God's sake, actually did work for a while, till last week. 1190 01:20:34,037 --> 01:20:36,622 -Then he had to kill her, huh? -Put a sock in it. 1191 01:20:36,790 --> 01:20:39,124 -I'm asking a question. -If you ask questions. . . 1192 01:20:39,292 --> 01:20:41,961 . . .then it seems like we don't know anything. Okay? 1193 01:20:42,128 --> 01:20:45,047 And for the record, it was the boyfriend, the guy from Paris. 1194 01:20:45,257 --> 01:20:48,884 He would've spotted the fake and said, "That's not Veronica." Am I right? 1195 01:20:49,052 --> 01:20:51,178 -Fuck you ! -Exactly. 1196 01:20:51,346 --> 01:20:53,973 So Dexter had Veronica killed, threw a dress on her. . . 1197 01:20:54,182 --> 01:20:57,643 . . .dumped the body and walked away clean, except for one little thing. 1198 01:20:57,853 --> 01:21:01,021 -Underpants. -One tiny little pair of undies. 1199 01:21:01,231 --> 01:21:02,690 Yeah. 1200 01:21:03,608 --> 01:21:06,902 You think that's funny, huh? I'm gonna break your nose now. 1201 01:21:07,404 --> 01:21:11,073 I want you to picture a bullet inside your head. Can you do that for me? 1202 01:21:11,241 --> 01:21:13,117 Fuck you. 1203 01:21:13,285 --> 01:21:16,036 -Anyway, that's ambiguous. -Ambiguous? I don't think so. 1204 01:21:16,204 --> 01:21:18,831 He means when you say, "Picture it inside your head". . . 1205 01:21:18,999 --> 01:21:21,333 . . . is that "a bullet will be inside your head". . . 1206 01:21:21,501 --> 01:21:24,336 -. . .or "picture it in your head"? -Harry, will you shut up. 1207 01:21:24,504 --> 01:21:27,673 I don't know anything about a girl, seriously. I was bluffing. 1208 01:21:27,841 --> 01:21:32,094 -I think that you are bluffing right now. -Harry, what are you doing? 1209 01:21:32,262 --> 01:21:34,555 What I'm doing for the guy who likes to bluftf. . . 1210 01:21:34,764 --> 01:21:40,144 . . . is I'm playing a little game called "Am I Bluffing?" Where is she? 1211 01:21:40,353 --> 01:21:42,980 Where the fuck is Harmony? You want to play hardball? 1212 01:21:43,189 --> 01:21:45,941 Where is the girl? 1213 01:21:46,443 --> 01:21:48,027 What did you just do? 1214 01:21:48,236 --> 01:21:51,697 -I just put in one bullet, didn't I? -You put a live round in that gun? 1215 01:21:51,865 --> 01:21:54,658 Yeah, there was like an 8 percent chance. 1216 01:21:54,826 --> 01:21:58,412 -Eight? Who taught you math? -Maybe it was more. I don't know-- 1217 01:21:59,039 --> 01:22:00,789 Shit! 1218 01:22:01,458 --> 01:22:03,417 -Hello? -Perry, is that you? 1219 01:22:03,585 --> 01:22:05,586 -Hey, it's me. -Hi, Harmony. 1220 01:22:05,795 --> 01:22:07,546 -What's going on? -Where are you? 1221 01:22:07,714 --> 01:22:09,214 -At home. -You're at home? 1222 01:22:09,382 --> 01:22:12,426 I just got back. I was in the Hills all day. Shitty reception. 1223 01:22:12,594 --> 01:22:15,888 -You don't sound so good. -Why aren't you following your lead? 1224 01:22:16,097 --> 01:22:18,098 Oh, forget it. It's just crazy. 1225 01:22:18,308 --> 01:22:20,184 No, it's not crazy. Listen-- 1226 01:22:20,393 --> 01:22:23,771 -lt's right out of a Gossamer book. -Don't talk. Listen. 1227 01:22:23,980 --> 01:22:26,148 -Eight percent. -And you, stop multiplying. 1228 01:22:26,316 --> 01:22:29,026 No, not you. Listen, call downtown. . . 1229 01:22:29,194 --> 01:22:31,987 . . .see if Veronica Dexter's body has gone to the mortuary. 1230 01:22:32,155 --> 01:22:34,531 If it has, see if there's a cremation scheduled. 1231 01:22:34,699 --> 01:22:37,826 -Wait, Perry. -Call me back right away. 1232 01:22:40,455 --> 01:22:43,207 Look, he was gonna kill you anyway. He said so. 1233 01:22:47,087 --> 01:22:48,921 Cover him up. I'll get the car. 1234 01:22:51,591 --> 01:22:54,551 -All right, that's pretty much all done. -Harry-- 1235 01:22:54,719 --> 01:22:59,848 I got an idea. I say we take the son of a bitch Dexter down. 1236 01:23:01,351 --> 01:23:05,354 To the racetrack and buy the son of a gun a drink. 1237 01:23:05,522 --> 01:23:10,192 What do you say, Perry? Oh, fuck, no fair. No fucking fair. 1238 01:23:10,360 --> 01:23:13,612 Aurelio, give Mr. Van Shrike a little pat down. 1239 01:23:21,621 --> 01:23:24,164 Fucking maricón. 1240 01:23:27,585 --> 01:23:30,045 Toss it here. Let's see who it is. 1241 01:23:32,257 --> 01:23:33,924 We're in trouble. Dexter's got us. 1242 01:23:38,596 --> 01:23:41,098 He just asked a carpet-cleaning service to save him. 1243 01:23:41,683 --> 01:23:44,143 Sorry, kid. Good hands, though. 1244 01:23:44,352 --> 01:23:47,396 Thanks. Used to be a magician. 1245 01:23:47,939 --> 01:23:52,526 And for 39.99 we'll carpet up to three rooms in half the time. 1246 01:23:52,694 --> 01:23:56,155 That's a $40 value. Act today. 1247 01:23:59,284 --> 01:24:02,411 That chick in the casket, she won't even match up with that. . . 1248 01:24:02,579 --> 01:24:05,622 . . . ringer you been toting around. You ever think about that? 1249 01:24:05,790 --> 01:24:08,417 He did, Harry. That's why he's cremating the body. 1250 01:24:09,961 --> 01:24:11,587 Yeah, you ready? 1251 01:24:13,298 --> 01:24:16,300 Speak of the devil. Gotta go. 1252 01:24:16,468 --> 01:24:20,054 Perry, nice to have known you. 1253 01:24:20,722 --> 01:24:22,347 -Harry. -Harry. Yes, of course. 1254 01:24:22,515 --> 01:24:23,891 Harry from New York. 1255 01:24:24,100 --> 01:24:28,228 I hope you don't judge Los Angeles based solely on your experience tonight. 1256 01:24:35,987 --> 01:24:38,655 I'm kind of scared here, Perry. 1257 01:24:38,823 --> 01:24:41,200 Aurelio, why don't you give the kid a break? 1258 01:24:41,367 --> 01:24:43,911 Do unto others and all that. It's Christmas. 1259 01:24:44,079 --> 01:24:46,246 -Who else knows? -I don't know anything. 1260 01:24:46,456 --> 01:24:48,707 I'm not even from here, you fuck-up. 1261 01:25:01,429 --> 01:25:03,472 Mr. Dexter, the coffin's good to go. 1262 01:25:03,640 --> 01:25:06,350 Okay, let's burn the bitch. 1263 01:25:09,270 --> 01:25:11,355 You could zap his chest. It'd be easier. 1264 01:25:11,564 --> 01:25:13,565 But we know why you gotta do it down there. 1265 01:25:13,733 --> 01:25:15,943 You like looking at his johnson, don't you? 1266 01:25:16,111 --> 01:25:17,903 Admit it, dude, you got it in you. 1267 01:25:21,241 --> 01:25:25,744 Enough ! Look me in the eyes and tell me you've never been with a man. 1268 01:25:25,954 --> 01:25:29,164 -Fuck you, maricón! Fuck you ! -That's what you want, isn't it? 1269 01:25:29,374 --> 01:25:32,501 -You want to fuck me. -Stop helping. Stop helping. 1270 01:25:32,710 --> 01:25:35,420 -If you are not gay, just say so. -Fuck you, maricón! 1271 01:25:36,548 --> 01:25:39,508 -Look at him. He can't even say it. -Stop helping ! 1272 01:25:39,717 --> 01:25:42,302 -Can't wait to have you as a patient. -Bet you can't. 1273 01:25:42,512 --> 01:25:44,429 -This is what you want. Here. -Shut up! 1274 01:25:44,639 --> 01:25:47,641 Take a look. You want some of this right here? Look at this. 1275 01:25:47,851 --> 01:25:49,059 Just shut up! 1276 01:25:52,897 --> 01:25:54,481 Yeah ! 1277 01:25:57,110 --> 01:25:59,611 Homophobes never check there. 1278 01:26:01,364 --> 01:26:04,741 Thank God you had a gun in there. I thought it was a gay thing. . . 1279 01:26:04,951 --> 01:26:07,703 . . . like somehow you guys could do that. Sorry. 1280 01:26:07,871 --> 01:26:10,914 -Are you okay? -Not really, no. 1281 01:26:11,291 --> 01:26:13,917 Gentlemen, let's wrap it up and get out of here. 1282 01:26:16,212 --> 01:26:19,464 -Who's driving? -I tell you what, I'll flip you for it. 1283 01:26:19,632 --> 01:26:21,466 All right. 1284 01:26:26,055 --> 01:26:27,973 -This way, come on. -Shit! 1285 01:26:34,105 --> 01:26:36,523 -Yeah. -Hey, Harmony, it's me. 1286 01:26:36,691 --> 01:26:38,692 Oh, God, how did you get away? 1287 01:26:38,902 --> 01:26:41,570 I shot him with a small revolver I keep near my balls. 1288 01:26:41,779 --> 01:26:45,574 I can't get to my car. We're near Olive and the freeway. Can you pick us up? 1289 01:26:45,742 --> 01:26:48,577 l'm in a van with the body. l'll be there in 30 seconds. 1290 01:26:48,786 --> 01:26:51,496 All right, be where I can see you. Be ready to move. 1291 01:26:52,832 --> 01:26:56,627 Shit, they're on my tail. I gotta go. 1292 01:27:07,555 --> 01:27:11,141 Right there. She's right there! Shit. 1293 01:27:18,650 --> 01:27:39,711 Harmony! 1294 01:27:55,353 --> 01:27:57,229 -Harmony! -Harry, don't! 1295 01:28:25,925 --> 01:28:29,803 Come on, we gotta go. They're coming back around. Harmony's down there. 1296 01:28:32,181 --> 01:28:35,642 Perry, what's wrong? 1297 01:28:37,145 --> 01:28:39,104 Come on, breathe. 1298 01:28:53,995 --> 01:28:55,954 Harry. 1299 01:29:01,919 --> 01:29:03,628 Harold. 1300 01:29:28,029 --> 01:29:29,863 Harold. . . 1301 01:29:30,198 --> 01:29:33,533 . . . use your awesome might. 1302 01:29:33,743 --> 01:29:37,245 Save me from this hopeless plight. 1303 01:29:38,706 --> 01:29:41,333 Harold. . . . 1304 01:30:31,801 --> 01:30:33,343 Harmony! 1305 01:30:45,898 --> 01:30:49,526 Captain Fucking Magic. 1306 01:30:55,366 --> 01:30:56,783 Come on ! 1307 01:31:09,046 --> 01:31:10,464 No. 1308 01:31:18,389 --> 01:31:21,391 There, all done. 1309 01:31:22,810 --> 01:31:24,644 Finished. 1310 01:31:34,071 --> 01:31:35,655 Harry. 1311 01:31:38,117 --> 01:31:41,620 -Did you call me? -Harry, you're shot. 1312 01:31:41,787 --> 01:31:44,206 No, no. Look, you want to see something cool? 1313 01:31:46,876 --> 01:31:50,587 Cool ! This stopped the bullet, Harry. 1314 01:31:57,887 --> 01:32:00,096 No, not really. 1315 01:32:00,890 --> 01:32:02,432 Oh, Harry. 1316 01:32:02,642 --> 01:32:05,268 Oh, God, Harry. 1317 01:32:08,189 --> 01:32:09,814 Harry. 1318 01:32:19,450 --> 01:32:23,954 -Hi. Welcome back. -Yeah. 1319 01:32:25,873 --> 01:32:29,417 -How many fingers? -Put that cat down, because I'm allergic. 1320 01:32:31,087 --> 01:32:33,838 You feeling okay? How's your. . .? 1321 01:32:34,006 --> 01:32:36,341 -My what? -Well, your. . . . 1322 01:32:36,551 --> 01:32:40,053 -Everything down there. -I can't believe he told you that. 1323 01:32:42,557 --> 01:32:44,683 It's Christmas, where's my present, Slick? 1324 01:32:44,892 --> 01:32:47,102 Your present is you're not in jail, fag-hag. 1325 01:32:47,311 --> 01:32:50,063 Yeah, boo, hiss, I know. Look, I hate it too. 1326 01:32:50,231 --> 01:32:53,650 ln movies where the studio gets all paranoid about a downer ending... 1327 01:32:53,818 --> 01:32:57,696 ...so the guy shows up, he's magically aIive on crutches, I hate that. 1328 01:32:57,863 --> 01:33:00,991 I mean, shit, why not bring them all back. 1329 01:33:01,951 --> 01:33:05,954 But the point is, in this case, this time, it really happened. 1330 01:33:06,122 --> 01:33:08,707 Perry, like, lived. Yeah, it's a dumb movie thing... 1331 01:33:08,874 --> 01:33:11,501 ...but what do you want me to do, lie about it? 1332 01:33:11,669 --> 01:33:13,461 So you found something out? 1333 01:33:13,629 --> 01:33:16,756 Yeah. But you're not gonna like it. 1334 01:33:18,342 --> 01:33:20,385 Dexter didn't murder your sister. 1335 01:33:21,220 --> 01:33:25,223 That's crazy. He was using my sister to impersonate his daughter, Perry. 1336 01:33:25,391 --> 01:33:28,101 Never happened. I talked to my police guy. 1337 01:33:29,478 --> 01:33:35,692 The ringer was a girl named Mia Frye, 23-year-old from Glendale. 1338 01:33:35,901 --> 01:33:38,320 When she wasn't impersonating Veronica Dexter. . . 1339 01:33:38,487 --> 01:33:40,697 . . .she wore a pink wig. 1340 01:33:42,742 --> 01:33:47,162 But my sister sent you up to Big Bear Lake, to his cabin. 1341 01:33:48,664 --> 01:33:52,626 Your sister was convinced that Dexter was her natural father. . . 1342 01:33:52,835 --> 01:33:55,337 . . .so she started following him, hanging around. 1343 01:33:55,546 --> 01:33:58,048 Do you see where I'm going with this? 1344 01:33:58,466 --> 01:34:01,426 One day your sister came calling, and she saw Dexter. . . 1345 01:34:01,594 --> 01:34:03,511 . . . in bed with the pink-haired girl. 1346 01:34:03,721 --> 01:34:06,389 What she thought was father and daughter. 1347 01:34:06,557 --> 01:34:08,808 Remember, that's how it would appear. 1348 01:34:08,976 --> 01:34:10,393 It was too much for her. 1349 01:34:10,561 --> 01:34:14,981 First the old father, now the shiny new one. 1350 01:34:15,191 --> 01:34:20,153 She couldn't handle it, and she took her own life. 1351 01:34:20,780 --> 01:34:24,824 What she hired me to film wasn't murder, but incest. 1352 01:34:27,244 --> 01:34:29,329 I'm sorry. 1353 01:34:29,497 --> 01:34:31,498 So much for unreality. 1354 01:34:31,666 --> 01:34:33,124 l said goodbye... 1355 01:34:33,542 --> 01:34:37,128 ...watched Jonny's world go back on the fiction shelf. 1356 01:34:37,296 --> 01:34:39,881 But whiIe it Iasted, brother... 1357 01:34:40,716 --> 01:34:42,759 . . .it was one for the books. 1358 01:34:44,053 --> 01:34:46,596 You should've told me you were arrested five times. 1359 01:34:47,306 --> 01:34:48,848 I should be pissed. 1360 01:34:49,016 --> 01:34:52,686 You should have told me that when you go home, you put on lady's underpants. 1361 01:34:52,853 --> 01:34:54,938 -That's cross-dressing, imbecile. -Whatever. 1362 01:34:55,106 --> 01:34:58,817 Half those guys are straight. Perfect fathers, love their kids. 1363 01:34:58,984 --> 01:35:01,027 How about you? Did your father love you? 1364 01:35:01,195 --> 01:35:05,198 Sometimes. You know, when I dressed up like a bottle. How about yours? 1365 01:35:05,366 --> 01:35:08,368 Well, he used to beat me in Morse code, so it's possible. . . 1366 01:35:08,577 --> 01:35:10,954 . . . but he never actually said the words. 1367 01:35:11,122 --> 01:35:13,415 -Harry. -What? 1368 01:35:13,582 --> 01:35:15,917 Don't steal any more shit. 1369 01:35:16,877 --> 01:35:18,878 You're not a punk. 1370 01:35:22,591 --> 01:35:23,883 You bet I'll turn around. 1371 01:35:24,343 --> 01:35:25,635 You like that, huh? 1372 01:35:25,803 --> 01:35:29,055 I saw him in the commissary twice. What is he, like 6'4"? 1373 01:35:29,223 --> 01:35:32,350 He doesn't know he's gay. Look how he walks. 1374 01:35:32,518 --> 01:35:34,144 So that's pretty much that. 1375 01:35:34,311 --> 01:35:37,272 We went back to Indiana, the three of us, for Jenna's funeraI. 1376 01:35:38,941 --> 01:35:41,151 Don't worry, I saw the Iast Lord of the Rings. 1377 01:35:41,318 --> 01:35:43,069 l won't have the movie end 1 7 times. 1378 01:35:43,237 --> 01:35:46,114 There is, though, one final scene for your viewing pleasure. 1379 01:35:55,791 --> 01:35:57,834 Do I know you? 1380 01:36:01,922 --> 01:36:04,507 No. Just in town for the funeral. 1381 01:36:04,967 --> 01:36:06,301 What do you want? 1382 01:36:06,510 --> 01:36:10,638 The zoo was closed, so I thought I'd come here and look at an animal. 1383 01:36:10,848 --> 01:36:12,348 Son of a-- 1384 01:36:12,516 --> 01:36:15,351 Who do you think you're talking to? 1385 01:36:15,519 --> 01:36:17,812 I buried my daughter today. 1386 01:36:18,022 --> 01:36:20,148 No. 1387 01:36:20,524 --> 01:36:23,401 You buried her 20 years ago. 1388 01:36:23,611 --> 01:36:27,655 Harmony was right, her sister was murdered. 1389 01:36:27,823 --> 01:36:31,785 You pulled the trigger. It just took this long for the bullet to hit. 1390 01:36:32,661 --> 01:36:34,871 Who are you? 1391 01:36:35,956 --> 01:36:37,832 I loved my girl. 1392 01:36:38,751 --> 01:36:42,212 You fucker! If I could get out of this bed-- 1393 01:36:42,379 --> 01:36:45,799 Yeah? Well, you can't. 1394 01:36:46,717 --> 01:36:49,052 You bastard ! 1395 01:36:52,556 --> 01:36:55,058 An old man that can't defend himself. 1396 01:36:55,267 --> 01:36:57,101 Big tough guy. 1397 01:36:57,269 --> 01:36:58,603 Yeah, that's right. 1398 01:37:00,231 --> 01:37:02,482 Big tough guy. 1399 01:37:16,205 --> 01:37:21,376 l prefer Genaros, but what do l know? l'm a bear. l suck the heads off fish. 1400 01:37:29,760 --> 01:37:33,555 That's it. That's the true story of what happened last Christmas. 1401 01:37:33,722 --> 01:37:37,392 That was some pretty harsh shit with the old guy back there, right? 1402 01:37:37,560 --> 01:37:40,520 But whatever, he's creepy. Fuck him. Don't worry about him. 1403 01:37:40,688 --> 01:37:42,856 Anyhow, so. . . . 1404 01:37:43,023 --> 01:37:44,732 Thanks for coming. 1405 01:37:44,900 --> 01:37:48,444 Thanks for taking the trip to L.A. with me. 1406 01:37:49,530 --> 01:37:51,447 If I had to sum it up, and I do-- 1407 01:37:51,615 --> 01:37:54,033 Because, you know, it's, like, the end. 1408 01:37:54,201 --> 01:37:58,705 --I would say that this movie is about-- It's about friendship. 1409 01:37:58,873 --> 01:38:01,082 -Friendship is sacred. -What are you doing? 1410 01:38:01,250 --> 01:38:02,959 I'm trying to wrap up the movie. . . 1411 01:38:03,127 --> 01:38:05,420 . . .and leave the people with a message. 1412 01:38:06,297 --> 01:38:09,382 I've got a message for you. Get your feet off my fucking desk. 1413 01:38:09,550 --> 01:38:11,634 Sorry. I work for Perry now. 1414 01:38:11,802 --> 01:38:13,511 -And stop narrating. -Obviously. 1415 01:38:13,679 --> 01:38:16,055 That's it. Please stay for the end credits. 1416 01:38:16,223 --> 01:38:19,601 If you're wondering who the best boy is, it's someone's nephew. 1417 01:38:19,768 --> 01:38:21,644 Don't forget to validate your parking. 1418 01:38:21,812 --> 01:38:24,022 For all of you good people in the Midwest. . . 1419 01:38:24,189 --> 01:38:25,773 . . .sorry we said "fuck" so much. 1420 01:38:25,941 --> 01:38:27,734 -Say good night. -Thanks again. 1421 01:38:27,902 --> 01:38:29,736 Now, go. Vanish. 1422 01:42:38,110 --> 01:42:40,111 Kiss Kiss Bang Bang