1 00:00:01,042 --> 00:00:03,378 It's here, it's -here, it's here! -Oh, my goodness! 2 00:00:03,378 --> 00:00:06,131 - It's here. - 3 00:00:06,131 --> 00:00:07,298 Oh! -Oh! 4 00:00:07,298 --> 00:00:08,758 - All right. - Oh... 5 00:00:08,758 --> 00:00:10,260 - What? - OK. I thought it would be... 6 00:00:10,260 --> 00:00:11,886 - I thought it would be... 7 00:00:11,886 --> 00:00:13,430 I thought it was like one of those new, the bigger ones. 8 00:00:13,430 --> 00:00:14,431 - Wow! - Wow! 9 00:00:14,431 --> 00:00:15,390 - I thought it's gonna be silver 10 00:00:15,390 --> 00:00:16,516 for some reason. - OK. 11 00:00:16,516 --> 00:00:18,268 Junior's, uh... - Windows open. 12 00:00:21,604 --> 00:00:25,191 Oh, it a It's a roll-up... Oh! 13 00:00:25,191 --> 00:00:28,111 - Yeah, we didn't pay for the-- that was an extra package. 14 00:00:28,111 --> 00:00:29,654 - Just roll-it-down. 15 00:00:29,654 --> 00:00:31,614 - I didn't know they still made roll-me-downs. 16 00:00:31,614 --> 00:00:34,743 It feels kind of like being in a cat carrier. 17 00:00:34,743 --> 00:00:36,077 - That's right. - Like-- Like I would imagine 18 00:00:36,077 --> 00:00:37,704 being in a cat carrier. - And also, 19 00:00:37,704 --> 00:00:39,622 I mean, in many ways, it also looks-- looks like it, too. 20 00:00:39,622 --> 00:00:40,623 - Yeah, yeah. - So... 21 00:00:40,623 --> 00:00:42,459 - Ignition on. 22 00:00:42,459 --> 00:00:44,085 - Step back... 23 00:00:44,085 --> 00:00:46,838 ...'cause it's probably gonna start up. - Step back 'cause it starts. 24 00:00:46,838 --> 00:00:49,049 - Wait. Wait, wait. Wait, wait, wait. I found it. I found it. I found it. 25 00:00:49,049 --> 00:00:50,467 Ready? - Yup. 26 00:00:53,303 --> 00:00:54,137 - Oh. - Oh. 27 00:00:54,137 --> 00:00:55,597 Oh, wow. 28 00:00:55,597 --> 00:00:58,016 It sounds kind of like it's apologizing. - Yeah. 29 00:00:58,016 --> 00:00:59,267 - But... Sheriff's Car. 30 00:00:59,267 --> 00:01:00,977 We have a 10-53, officer down. - What? Shit. 31 00:01:00,977 --> 00:01:02,562 - Requesting backup. - All right. Got it. 32 00:01:02,562 --> 00:01:04,731 - All right. You got this, Junior. 33 00:01:05,940 --> 00:01:08,234 Go get 'em. What's he doing? 34 00:01:08,234 --> 00:01:09,861 - Do we need another cop? Oh, my God, it's plugged in. 35 00:01:09,861 --> 00:01:10,945 - 36 00:01:10,945 --> 00:01:12,655 It's still plugged in. It's still plugged in. 37 00:01:12,655 --> 00:01:14,199 It's still plugged in. It's still plugged in. It's still plugged in. 38 00:01:14,199 --> 00:01:15,700 Aah! Aah! - 39 00:01:19,037 --> 00:01:21,247 You can do it. Almost doing it. 40 00:01:21,247 --> 00:01:22,707 You can do it. You know what's amazing about this? 41 00:01:22,707 --> 00:01:25,376 I didn't even know that Senegal made cars. 42 00:01:25,376 --> 00:01:27,045 - They stopped. - Oh... 43 00:01:27,045 --> 00:01:29,255 - We're lucky we got this one. - Yeah, they don't... Yeah. 44 00:01:29,255 --> 00:01:31,424 Right, that was ordered before their recall. 45 00:01:31,424 --> 00:01:33,510 Oh, man! 46 00:01:33,510 --> 00:01:33,760 Oh, shit! We just back away? 47 00:01:34,803 --> 00:01:37,097 OK. Hang on, hang on. 48 00:01:37,097 --> 00:01:39,224 - How do we do this? Hang on. - Ow! OK. Ow! 49 00:01:39,224 --> 00:01:41,559 You got my leg. My leg's in your... 50 00:01:41,559 --> 00:01:43,019 - Friend, you gotta move your leg. 51 00:01:43,019 --> 00:01:44,687 I can't leave my leg. - Hang on. I gotta... 52 00:01:44,687 --> 00:01:47,148 - You almost missed the whole parade. 53 00:01:47,148 --> 00:01:48,608 - Hey, Jackie, how are you doing today? - We almost missed the whole parade, 54 00:01:48,608 --> 00:01:50,110 Jackie. No, wait. - Whole parade! 55 00:01:50,110 --> 00:01:52,195 -- All right. -Calm down, calm down, calm down. 56 00:01:52,195 --> 00:01:54,114 - What happened to your eyeball? - Somebody took my glass eye. 57 00:01:54,114 --> 00:01:55,532 - Somebody took your glass eye? Oh! 58 00:01:55,532 --> 00:01:57,450 - Yeah, on my birthday. 59 00:01:57,450 --> 00:02:00,120 - You didn't just lose it? - On my-- On my 23rd birthday. 60 00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:02,413 - You didn't just lose it? - This man, "Can I borrow your eye?" 61 00:02:02,413 --> 00:02:03,623 -I'm gonna look around for the eye, OK? - And I said, 62 00:02:03,623 --> 00:02:06,459 "Sure, you could borrow my eye, you poor, fat fuck." 63 00:02:06,459 --> 00:02:08,169 - Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. - And then he went off with it. 64 00:02:08,169 --> 00:02:10,755 - What color-- What color, uh, is your eyeball's glass eye? 65 00:02:12,173 --> 00:02:15,051 - I don't-- How the fuck am I supposed to know? It's usually in my eye. 66 00:02:15,051 --> 00:02:18,096 I was just getting ready to start my own business. 67 00:02:18,096 --> 00:02:21,141 I opened up a pet shot. And then, I had seven-- 68 00:02:21,141 --> 00:02:23,268 - You aren't running a pet shop, Jackie. 69 00:02:23,268 --> 00:02:25,687 - There's all kinds of registration you gotta do. You gotta get a license. 70 00:02:26,938 --> 00:02:28,106 - All right, all right, all right. - Jackie. 71 00:02:28,106 --> 00:02:31,985 - I had seven rats in a box. - Whoa. Whoa. 72 00:02:31,985 --> 00:02:34,112 - And all of them fuckers... - That's not a pet shop. 73 00:02:34,112 --> 00:02:38,283 - ...all of them fuckers just decided they had better places to be. 74 00:02:38,283 --> 00:02:39,701 - You know what people called and said that you were doing? 75 00:02:39,701 --> 00:02:41,327 - What? - What do you think-- 76 00:02:41,327 --> 00:02:42,495 What do you think people call them? 77 00:02:42,495 --> 00:02:44,497 Want to play charades? Charades? Ready? - OK. 78 00:02:44,497 --> 00:02:45,582 Uh... Uh, crack pipe. 79 00:02:46,708 --> 00:02:48,585 - How did you get that so fast? 80 00:02:50,378 --> 00:02:53,047 Uh, having sausages for breakfast. 81 00:02:53,047 --> 00:02:55,216 I haven't had sausage for breakfast from, like, fifth years... 82 00:02:55,216 --> 00:02:57,385 - Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. - So don't even try. 83 00:02:57,385 --> 00:03:00,013 - You got the wrong lady. You know why? - I do. 84 00:03:00,013 --> 00:03:03,474 - Because I always do a little bit of meth and then I do a little bit of this. 85 00:03:03,474 --> 00:03:05,727 But then I always go back to do more meth, and you skipped that part. 86 00:03:07,729 --> 00:03:09,147 - Do you want to try to get her on the vehicle? I don't. 87 00:03:09,147 --> 00:03:10,273 - Not really. 88 00:03:10,273 --> 00:03:11,441 - Not really, either. - Uh-oh. 89 00:03:11,441 --> 00:03:13,526 - Jackie, you know what makes me sad? - What's that? 90 00:03:13,526 --> 00:03:15,987 - You used to at least run sometimes. 91 00:03:15,987 --> 00:03:18,323 - Yeah, well, I'm 23 now. I know. 92 00:03:18,323 --> 00:03:21,034 - I don't have the kind of mobility like I used to. 93 00:03:21,034 --> 00:03:23,661 - OK. Hang on, hang on. Hey, this is nice. 94 00:03:23,661 --> 00:03:25,246 This is like a hot tub without all the water. 95 00:03:26,372 --> 00:03:27,832 - ...the Fire Department. 96 00:03:27,832 --> 00:03:30,543 Bye, everybody. Bye, Santa. 97 00:03:33,254 --> 00:03:35,757 - So, every year, the Reno Sheriff's Department 98 00:03:35,757 --> 00:03:39,093 does a toy drive for the kids at Christmas time. 99 00:03:39,093 --> 00:03:42,430 And this year some sick asshole wrote 100 00:03:42,430 --> 00:03:45,141 "Sex Toy Drive" on the Ha-ha. 101 00:03:45,141 --> 00:03:46,351 - Yeah, hilarious. 102 00:03:46,351 --> 00:03:48,353 So now we get to go through the box 103 00:03:48,353 --> 00:03:51,189 and separate the sex toys from the real toys. 104 00:03:51,189 --> 00:03:52,941 What's this? - I mean, I see something obvious, 105 00:03:52,941 --> 00:03:55,318 right here. That's a toy. - Mm. OK. 106 00:03:55,318 --> 00:03:56,152 All right. 107 00:03:56,986 --> 00:03:58,655 Uh-huh. 108 00:03:58,655 --> 00:03:59,948 - That looks like a Yeah. 109 00:04:02,617 --> 00:04:04,285 What is that? Uh... 110 00:04:04,285 --> 00:04:05,453 - I know what it is. It don't look like 111 00:04:05,453 --> 00:04:06,371 nothing to me. 112 00:04:08,164 --> 00:04:09,958 - I don't know... Put it in the packet. - We don't want kids to touch that. 113 00:04:09,958 --> 00:04:12,085 - It wasn't even zipped. - It wasn't zipped. OK. Next. 114 00:04:13,461 --> 00:04:18,299 Disgusting! Disgusting! - Oh! Ew! Ew! Ew! 115 00:04:18,299 --> 00:04:19,926 - Know what they use that for? 116 00:04:19,926 --> 00:04:21,511 Yeah. - Ugh! 117 00:04:21,511 --> 00:04:24,806 - Oh, I thought it was... for jump rope and I always hated that game. 118 00:04:24,806 --> 00:04:26,266 - It was unwrapped... - Whatever. 119 00:04:26,266 --> 00:04:27,392 Put it in. Yeah. - ...so it goes in the bio-hazard thing. 120 00:04:28,393 --> 00:04:29,102 Oh. 121 00:04:30,395 --> 00:04:31,688 - That's fun. - A gun. 122 00:04:31,688 --> 00:04:34,315 Another nice, fun gun for the kids to play with. 123 00:04:34,315 --> 00:04:35,733 - That's fun for the kids. - Right. 124 00:04:35,733 --> 00:04:37,443 - My turn. 125 00:04:37,443 --> 00:04:38,861 Aw! - Aw! 126 00:04:38,861 --> 00:04:40,488 - Oh, that's cute. - That's very cute. 127 00:04:40,488 --> 00:04:41,781 - Although you know what? 128 00:04:41,781 --> 00:04:43,533 I've seen people fuck bears like this before. 129 00:04:43,533 --> 00:04:45,076 - Yeah. That's true. 130 00:04:45,076 --> 00:04:47,745 I like it-- - Let's put it in the "Maybe" pile. 131 00:04:47,745 --> 00:04:49,038 Keep it for the kids. - Let's put it in the "Maybe" pile. 132 00:04:49,038 --> 00:04:51,291 I could see someone putting that in their ass. 133 00:04:51,291 --> 00:04:54,127 You guys, another fun gun for the kids. 134 00:04:54,127 --> 00:04:55,378 - That's cute 'cause I like 135 00:04:55,378 --> 00:04:56,796 that it looks like wood. Is it wood? - See, this was-- 136 00:04:56,796 --> 00:04:58,715 This was getting to be a successful toy drive. 137 00:04:59,882 --> 00:05:00,675 Huh. 138 00:05:02,093 --> 00:05:03,720 Well, that's elegant. 139 00:05:03,720 --> 00:05:04,846 - Says you stick it up your Wait. 140 00:05:05,847 --> 00:05:07,432 I think this is a video game thing. 141 00:05:08,641 --> 00:05:10,476 - Oh, where you, like, try and fuck the characters? 142 00:05:10,476 --> 00:05:11,644 - Yeah. Something like that. 143 00:05:11,644 --> 00:05:14,147 It says "Super joy stick." 144 00:05:14,147 --> 00:05:15,732 Like "joy stick." Yeah. 145 00:05:15,732 --> 00:05:18,276 - Yeah. Like somebody's dick and stuff. 146 00:05:18,276 --> 00:05:22,155 - Uh, hey, ladies. Has anybody seen my giggle pistol? 147 00:05:22,155 --> 00:05:25,408 It's like a little multi-colored gun, and you can, uh, put nitrous in it. 148 00:05:25,408 --> 00:05:27,285 And somebody shoots it up your butt while you, uh, jerk off. 149 00:05:28,494 --> 00:05:29,787 - - Oh. 150 00:05:29,787 --> 00:05:31,789 - Oh, yeah, there it is. 151 00:05:31,789 --> 00:05:33,583 - Is it that orange? - Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Oh, thank you. 152 00:05:33,583 --> 00:05:34,709 - Oh, my God! - Good thing you got here when you did. 153 00:05:34,709 --> 00:05:36,669 - And my dick stretcher. How did that get in there? 154 00:05:36,669 --> 00:05:38,129 Thank you, guys. 155 00:05:38,129 --> 00:05:41,299 ♪ We're going out tonight I'm putting nitrous up my butt ♪ 156 00:05:41,299 --> 00:05:43,843 ♪ I'm gonna shoot my giggle gun I'm gonna stretch out my dick ♪ 157 00:05:47,972 --> 00:05:51,642 - Oh, shit! This reminds me of my last birthday. 158 00:05:51,642 --> 00:05:56,105 I'm not letting go of this loser. You better believe that. Ow! 159 00:05:56,105 --> 00:05:58,399 - Go. Go, go, go, go, go. Wait for me. - ...my hair. 160 00:05:58,399 --> 00:06:00,902 - Oh, hey, Carl. Ah, shit. 161 00:06:00,902 --> 00:06:03,071 I'll push it. You-- You stay, I'll push. You stay and I'll push. 162 00:06:03,071 --> 00:06:03,988 She didn't look so good... 163 00:06:03,988 --> 00:06:05,323 ...the last time I saw her. 164 00:06:05,323 --> 00:06:07,158 I gotta be honest with you. 165 00:06:07,158 --> 00:06:09,702 - She's gotta keep taking those pills for rickets. 166 00:06:09,702 --> 00:06:10,578 - Turn it, turn it. There we go. 167 00:06:11,496 --> 00:06:13,414 Will it start if I jump in? 168 00:06:13,414 --> 00:06:14,248 Yep. I got it. - You got it? 169 00:06:15,291 --> 00:06:18,586 - Hey, this isn't a birthday parade. 170 00:06:19,796 --> 00:06:21,631 Shit. It stalled again. 171 00:06:21,631 --> 00:06:23,383 Stalled. Well, we're ...goin' on our way. 172 00:06:23,383 --> 00:06:24,050 Woo-hoo!