1 00:00:02,836 --> 00:00:04,772 There we go, watch your step. 2 00:00:04,838 --> 00:00:06,774 I can't feel my face, Charlie. 3 00:00:06,840 --> 00:00:10,478 You just had two wisdom teeth pulled. 4 00:00:10,544 --> 00:00:13,481 Watch the drool. 5 00:00:17,618 --> 00:00:20,188 Whoa. Look at that. 6 00:00:22,156 --> 00:00:25,059 That is a very sexy woman. 7 00:00:25,126 --> 00:00:28,096 I'm sowwy? This awouses you? 8 00:00:28,162 --> 00:00:29,563 Hey, how you doing? 9 00:00:29,630 --> 00:00:32,233 Hey. 10 00:00:32,300 --> 00:00:36,504 Charlie, walk away. 11 00:00:36,570 --> 00:00:37,771 Relax. 12 00:00:37,838 --> 00:00:39,607 This could be interesting. 13 00:00:42,143 --> 00:00:44,745 You got a nice swing. 14 00:00:44,812 --> 00:00:46,280 Thanks. 15 00:00:47,781 --> 00:00:50,884 Try stepping into it, you'll get more power that way. 16 00:00:50,951 --> 00:00:53,121 You mean like this? 17 00:00:55,856 --> 00:00:57,291 Oh, yeah. 18 00:00:57,358 --> 00:00:58,559 Dial one and the area code 19 00:00:58,626 --> 00:01:00,761 'cause that is long distance. 20 00:01:00,828 --> 00:01:03,297 Charlie, let's go. 21 00:01:03,364 --> 00:01:04,665 This woman is cwearly a wunatic. 22 00:01:04,732 --> 00:01:08,669 Yeah, but look at the passion, the fire... 23 00:01:09,770 --> 00:01:11,372 the ass. 24 00:01:15,075 --> 00:01:16,577 Is this your car? 25 00:01:16,644 --> 00:01:18,612 Do I look crazy to you? 26 00:01:18,679 --> 00:01:21,782 Well, frankly... 27 00:01:26,120 --> 00:01:27,355 So whose car is it? 28 00:01:27,421 --> 00:01:28,622 Cheating boyfriend? 29 00:01:28,689 --> 00:01:30,658 Nope. Psychiatrist. 30 00:01:32,893 --> 00:01:35,263 Charlie, psychiatwist. 31 00:01:35,329 --> 00:01:36,764 What more do you need to hear? 32 00:01:36,830 --> 00:01:38,266 Hang on. 33 00:01:38,332 --> 00:01:41,101 So you're beating up your shrink's car? 34 00:01:41,169 --> 00:01:43,671 He said I have anger issues. 35 00:01:48,209 --> 00:01:51,679 The quack. 36 00:01:51,745 --> 00:01:53,481 Then he hit on me. 37 00:01:53,547 --> 00:01:55,283 The horny quack. 38 00:01:56,784 --> 00:01:58,486 Hey, hold this for me. 39 00:01:58,552 --> 00:01:59,687 Oh, good. 40 00:01:59,753 --> 00:02:01,422 I'm on deck. 41 00:02:03,624 --> 00:02:05,159 ( air hissing ) 42 00:02:05,226 --> 00:02:08,362 Man, this is gonna take forever. 43 00:02:08,429 --> 00:02:10,364 Either one of you guys got an ice pick? 44 00:02:14,502 --> 00:02:16,770 Don't cars like this usually have an awarm system? 45 00:02:16,837 --> 00:02:19,106 ( alarm blares ) 46 00:02:19,173 --> 00:02:20,341 Thanks a lot. 47 00:02:20,408 --> 00:02:22,109 Let's get out of here, Charlie. 48 00:02:22,176 --> 00:02:23,811 Hey! 49 00:02:23,877 --> 00:02:27,181 You're not just gonna leave me here, are you? 50 00:02:27,248 --> 00:02:29,850 No. Yes. 51 00:02:29,917 --> 00:02:31,652 Alan... Charlie... 52 00:02:33,754 --> 00:02:37,425 So how come Mush Mouth gets shotgun? 53 00:02:37,491 --> 00:02:40,060 * Men, men, men, men, manly men, men, men * 54 00:02:40,127 --> 00:02:42,263 * Men... * 55 00:02:48,068 --> 00:02:51,272 Anti-depressants, tranquilizers, sleeping pills. 56 00:02:51,339 --> 00:02:52,506 You want any of these? 57 00:02:52,573 --> 00:02:54,208 No, thanks. I'm good. 58 00:02:54,275 --> 00:02:56,310 Are you sure? 'Cause you seem a little edgy. 59 00:02:56,377 --> 00:02:59,613 No, I'm a wot edgy. 60 00:03:03,651 --> 00:03:07,187 Isn't throwing that stuff on the road a wittle dangerous? 61 00:03:07,255 --> 00:03:09,390 To who, raccoons? 62 00:03:09,457 --> 00:03:12,393 They can't get past the childproof cap. 63 00:03:14,862 --> 00:03:17,331 I got to say, I really appreciate this, guys. 64 00:03:17,398 --> 00:03:18,332 No problem. 65 00:03:18,399 --> 00:03:20,401 Big pwoblem. 66 00:03:20,468 --> 00:03:22,536 Frankie. Charlie. 67 00:03:25,973 --> 00:03:27,608 Awan. 68 00:03:27,675 --> 00:03:28,709 Owan? 69 00:03:28,776 --> 00:03:32,880 Not Owan, Awan. 70 00:03:34,214 --> 00:03:36,850 Is Awan a little slow? 71 00:03:38,252 --> 00:03:39,787 Yeah. 72 00:03:41,289 --> 00:03:44,157 But I make up for it by being a little fast. 73 00:03:44,224 --> 00:03:45,959 Uh-oh. I know your type. 74 00:03:46,026 --> 00:03:47,661 You do, huh? Yep. 75 00:03:47,728 --> 00:03:49,697 Don't care for it particularly. 76 00:03:51,632 --> 00:03:55,002 So, where can we dwop you? 77 00:03:55,068 --> 00:03:57,204 Well, that's the thing. 78 00:03:57,271 --> 00:03:58,872 I really don't have anywhere to stay. 79 00:03:58,939 --> 00:04:03,210 Why, did you escape from someplace? 80 00:04:03,277 --> 00:04:05,012 Oh, great. 81 00:04:05,078 --> 00:04:09,049 Pot shots from Spittle Boy. 82 00:04:09,116 --> 00:04:10,651 And if you must know, 83 00:04:10,718 --> 00:04:12,553 I'm having family problems. 84 00:04:12,620 --> 00:04:14,355 Charlie, you wouldn't happen to know of a place 85 00:04:14,422 --> 00:04:15,856 I could crash tonight, would you? 86 00:04:18,826 --> 00:04:21,261 Oh, cwap. 87 00:04:22,963 --> 00:04:24,097 Here we are. 88 00:04:24,164 --> 00:04:25,833 Chez Charlie. 89 00:04:25,899 --> 00:04:28,369 Great house. 90 00:04:28,436 --> 00:04:30,638 Oh, wow, you're right on the beach. 91 00:04:30,704 --> 00:04:34,375 I have got to go for a swim. 92 00:04:41,782 --> 00:04:43,884 Charlie... 93 00:04:43,951 --> 00:04:45,353 Charlie... 94 00:04:45,419 --> 00:04:48,255 she's taking her clothes off. 95 00:04:48,322 --> 00:04:51,224 Is this a great country or what? 96 00:04:51,291 --> 00:04:53,160 Hi, Dad. Hey, Uncle Charlie. 97 00:04:53,226 --> 00:04:54,294 Hey, guys. 98 00:04:54,362 --> 00:04:56,163 Rose, what are you doing? 99 00:04:56,229 --> 00:04:58,332 We're playing Mummy on a Chair. 100 00:04:59,800 --> 00:05:00,968 I'm the mummy. 101 00:05:01,034 --> 00:05:03,003 ( doorbell rings ) 102 00:05:04,304 --> 00:05:06,006 Judith. Hi. 103 00:05:06,073 --> 00:05:07,174 Is Jake ready to go? 104 00:05:07,240 --> 00:05:08,442 Hang on. 105 00:05:08,509 --> 00:05:10,143 Jake, your mom's here. 106 00:05:10,210 --> 00:05:11,612 Charlie, why don't you 107 00:05:11,679 --> 00:05:14,415 go out on the deck and keep an eye out for... 108 00:05:14,482 --> 00:05:16,249 approaching squalls. 109 00:05:16,316 --> 00:05:18,919 I'm on it. 110 00:05:21,655 --> 00:05:23,491 It's squall season. 111 00:05:24,892 --> 00:05:26,026 Hi, Mom. 112 00:05:26,093 --> 00:05:27,428 Hi, sweetheart. 113 00:05:27,495 --> 00:05:30,330 Uh, what is he doing? 114 00:05:30,398 --> 00:05:32,533 He's playing Mummy on a Chair. 115 00:05:32,600 --> 00:05:34,167 Where's the chair? 116 00:05:34,234 --> 00:05:36,937 I don't know the rules, Judith. 117 00:05:40,441 --> 00:05:41,509 Hey, Rose. 118 00:05:41,575 --> 00:05:42,810 Thanks for baby-sitting. 119 00:05:42,876 --> 00:05:43,877 Oh, no problem. 120 00:05:43,944 --> 00:05:45,112 We had fun. Good. 121 00:05:45,178 --> 00:05:46,814 So, who's the naked lady? 122 00:05:46,880 --> 00:05:47,981 I'm not really sure. 123 00:05:48,048 --> 00:05:50,250 She was trashing a car with a baseball bat 124 00:05:50,317 --> 00:05:51,885 when we left the dentist's office, 125 00:05:51,952 --> 00:05:54,287 and, you know, one thing kind of led to another. 126 00:05:54,354 --> 00:05:56,824 So you met cute. That's nice. 127 00:05:56,890 --> 00:05:59,460 But you know, you may want to be careful 128 00:05:59,527 --> 00:06:01,595 with a girl like that, Charlie. 129 00:06:01,662 --> 00:06:03,831 One day it's baseball bats and windshields. 130 00:06:03,897 --> 00:06:06,166 The next day you wake up with your testicles 131 00:06:06,233 --> 00:06:08,235 superglued to your thigh. 132 00:06:08,301 --> 00:06:11,304 Point taken. 133 00:06:11,371 --> 00:06:15,175 I'm sorry about that, by the way. 134 00:06:15,242 --> 00:06:18,546 Water under the bridge. 135 00:06:20,047 --> 00:06:22,015 Hurry up, Jake. Your mother's waiting. 136 00:06:22,082 --> 00:06:24,217 Remember, I'm bringing him back tomorrow night 137 00:06:24,284 --> 00:06:25,686 so I can see my parents. 138 00:06:25,753 --> 00:06:28,388 Why is there a woman's shoe on your floor? 139 00:06:29,990 --> 00:06:33,661 Uh, well, um, uh... apparently, uh, uh, 140 00:06:33,727 --> 00:06:36,564 Mummy on a Chair is a very complex game. 141 00:06:37,465 --> 00:06:39,332 Bye, Dad. 142 00:06:39,399 --> 00:06:40,668 See ya, pal. 143 00:06:40,734 --> 00:06:42,636 Tell your brother he's a pig. 144 00:06:43,571 --> 00:06:46,173 I'll leave a note on the fridge. 145 00:06:46,239 --> 00:06:48,709 Oh, God, I needed that. 146 00:06:48,776 --> 00:06:49,843 Me, too. 147 00:06:51,044 --> 00:06:53,547 It's like all my insanity and rage 148 00:06:53,614 --> 00:06:55,415 have just been washed away. 149 00:06:55,483 --> 00:06:56,917 That's good, 'cause, you know, 150 00:06:56,984 --> 00:06:59,152 all your drugs are on the Coast Highway. 151 00:07:00,988 --> 00:07:03,557 So, where can I take a nice, hot shower? 152 00:07:07,360 --> 00:07:10,498 I said where, not with whom. 153 00:07:14,401 --> 00:07:15,803 You're so cute. 154 00:07:16,704 --> 00:07:18,438 Right back at ya. 155 00:07:19,473 --> 00:07:20,674 Good, Charlie. 156 00:07:20,741 --> 00:07:22,242 Keep hitting on the deranged woman. 157 00:07:22,309 --> 00:07:23,844 Uh, while you're at it, 158 00:07:23,911 --> 00:07:26,480 why don't you try humping a bear trap? 159 00:07:26,547 --> 00:07:27,881 Alan, open your eyes. 160 00:07:27,948 --> 00:07:30,350 This is an intriguing, exciting woman. 161 00:07:30,417 --> 00:07:32,285 A rare and magnificent jewel. 162 00:07:32,352 --> 00:07:34,354 She's hot, and you're horny. 163 00:07:34,421 --> 00:07:36,189 I'm saying. 164 00:07:39,292 --> 00:07:43,263 Mmm, I just love warm sake. 165 00:07:43,330 --> 00:07:45,365 Me, too. 166 00:07:45,432 --> 00:07:47,735 Tora! Tora! Tora! 167 00:07:49,803 --> 00:07:51,038 You know, Frankie, 168 00:07:51,104 --> 00:07:53,774 there are many fine hotels in the area. 169 00:07:53,841 --> 00:07:55,375 I can't stay in a hotel. 170 00:07:55,442 --> 00:07:56,376 Why not? 171 00:07:56,443 --> 00:07:57,845 Wow. 172 00:07:57,911 --> 00:08:00,548 That is a very good question. 173 00:08:06,754 --> 00:08:09,256 So, uh, where are you from? 174 00:08:09,322 --> 00:08:11,191 Guess. 175 00:08:11,258 --> 00:08:15,128 I wouldn't know where to begin. 176 00:08:15,195 --> 00:08:16,897 Okay. 177 00:08:21,334 --> 00:08:23,571 Here I am yakking about myself. 178 00:08:23,637 --> 00:08:25,205 What about you guys? 179 00:08:25,272 --> 00:08:26,339 Alan, what do you do? 180 00:08:26,406 --> 00:08:28,909 Oh, wow, good question. Guess. 181 00:08:30,711 --> 00:08:32,279 How 'bout that? 182 00:08:34,114 --> 00:08:36,283 Alan, don't be childish. 183 00:08:36,349 --> 00:08:37,918 She started it. 184 00:08:39,553 --> 00:08:41,188 He's a chiropractor. 185 00:08:41,254 --> 00:08:43,256 Really? 186 00:08:44,224 --> 00:08:45,358 That's terrific. 187 00:08:45,425 --> 00:08:48,996 I have so much respect for what you guys do. 188 00:08:50,297 --> 00:08:50,964 Seriously? 189 00:08:51,031 --> 00:08:52,032 Yeah. 190 00:08:52,099 --> 00:08:53,266 Well, thank you. 191 00:08:53,333 --> 00:08:55,002 See that, Charlie? 192 00:08:55,068 --> 00:08:56,770 My brother thinks I'm just a glorified masseuse. 193 00:08:58,471 --> 00:09:00,240 I never said "glorified." 194 00:09:02,509 --> 00:09:05,145 Oh, Charlie, you are so wrong. 195 00:09:05,212 --> 00:09:06,714 Chiropractors are like 196 00:09:06,780 --> 00:09:08,381 angels of healing. 197 00:09:08,448 --> 00:09:10,050 These hands 198 00:09:10,117 --> 00:09:13,887 have amazing powers to bring relief and even pleasure. 199 00:09:13,954 --> 00:09:17,057 Hey, these aren't exactly hooks. 200 00:09:19,126 --> 00:09:22,262 So, uh, do you get regular chiropractic work? 201 00:09:22,329 --> 00:09:23,997 Are you kidding? Once a week. 202 00:09:24,064 --> 00:09:26,566 In fact, I'm in desperate need of an adjustment right now. 203 00:09:26,634 --> 00:09:27,701 Well, let me get my table. 204 00:09:27,768 --> 00:09:28,501 I'll fix you right up. 205 00:09:28,568 --> 00:09:29,703 Awesome. 206 00:09:29,770 --> 00:09:31,905 Do you want me with clothes or without? 207 00:09:52,760 --> 00:09:56,029 Are they looking for me? 208 00:09:56,096 --> 00:09:58,365 You didn't say anything, did you? 209 00:09:58,431 --> 00:09:59,700 ( knocking on door ) 210 00:09:59,767 --> 00:10:01,068 I gotta go. I love you. 211 00:10:01,134 --> 00:10:02,069 See you soon. 212 00:10:02,135 --> 00:10:03,370 Come in. 213 00:10:05,405 --> 00:10:06,940 Hey. Hey. 214 00:10:07,007 --> 00:10:08,341 I was just going to go to bed, 215 00:10:08,408 --> 00:10:10,878 and I wanted to see if you needed anything. 216 00:10:10,944 --> 00:10:13,947 Towels, sheets... 217 00:10:14,014 --> 00:10:16,650 vodka? 218 00:10:16,717 --> 00:10:18,185 No, I'm great. Thanks. 219 00:10:18,251 --> 00:10:21,321 Alan got me totally jelled out with that adjustment. 220 00:10:21,388 --> 00:10:24,925 Man, you so lucky to have him right here in this house. 221 00:10:24,992 --> 00:10:28,729 Yeah, I'm living a dream. 222 00:10:30,063 --> 00:10:33,633 So, listen, if you need to talk to somebody 223 00:10:33,701 --> 00:10:36,904 about, you know, anything, I'm here. 224 00:10:38,806 --> 00:10:40,741 I see that. 225 00:10:40,808 --> 00:10:43,276 Okay, then. Well... 226 00:10:43,343 --> 00:10:44,477 Hey, Charlie? 227 00:10:44,544 --> 00:10:47,080 Yeah? 228 00:10:47,147 --> 00:10:50,517 I think you're a really cool guy. 229 00:10:50,583 --> 00:10:53,186 Yeah? 230 00:10:53,253 --> 00:10:56,356 But I'm not going to have sex with you. 231 00:11:06,166 --> 00:11:08,802 Ever? 232 00:11:08,869 --> 00:11:10,804 Good night, Charlie. 233 00:11:10,871 --> 00:11:13,140 Good night. 234 00:11:16,309 --> 00:11:17,878 Okay. 235 00:11:17,945 --> 00:11:21,248 Round one to the hot, crazy chick. 236 00:11:27,587 --> 00:11:29,990 Man, deep tissue massage, 237 00:11:30,057 --> 00:11:30,791 pancakes. 238 00:11:30,858 --> 00:11:32,459 If you had a TV on your forehead 239 00:11:32,525 --> 00:11:36,063 and could breathe through your ears, you'd be perfect. 240 00:11:41,101 --> 00:11:44,304 Uh... so... so, uh... so, uh, 241 00:11:44,371 --> 00:11:47,407 nobody makes you pancakes where you live? 242 00:11:48,675 --> 00:11:50,978 Not your, uh.... not your husband? 243 00:11:52,612 --> 00:11:53,947 Boyfriend? 244 00:11:55,515 --> 00:11:57,350 Girlfriend? 245 00:11:59,419 --> 00:12:02,689 Mother, father, grandma... 246 00:12:02,756 --> 00:12:06,026 c...ellmate? 247 00:12:13,433 --> 00:12:15,803 Round two. Ding. 248 00:12:18,438 --> 00:12:19,672 Good morning, Frankie. 249 00:12:19,739 --> 00:12:20,941 Good morning, Charlie. 250 00:12:21,842 --> 00:12:23,510 Morning. 251 00:12:23,576 --> 00:12:25,478 Yeah. 252 00:12:25,545 --> 00:12:29,482 So, Frankie... Boy, that is a pretty name. 253 00:12:30,750 --> 00:12:31,785 How'd you sleep? 254 00:12:31,852 --> 00:12:34,187 Great, except... 255 00:12:34,254 --> 00:12:37,324 I had this wild erotic dream... 256 00:12:38,525 --> 00:12:41,494 ...and I woke up all drenched in sweat. 257 00:12:44,764 --> 00:12:46,834 Could you pass the syrup? 258 00:12:47,901 --> 00:12:50,170 Sure. Sure, yeah. 259 00:12:50,237 --> 00:12:52,840 Thanks, sweetie. You're a doll. 260 00:12:58,979 --> 00:13:00,313 You know, I can't thank you guys enough 261 00:13:00,380 --> 00:13:02,349 for letting me stay here last night. 262 00:13:02,415 --> 00:13:04,517 I just wish there was some way I could repay you. 263 00:13:04,584 --> 00:13:07,554 Well, for a start, you could tell us something about yourself. 264 00:13:07,620 --> 00:13:09,489 Anything, really. 265 00:13:09,556 --> 00:13:12,192 I wouldn't mind hearing more about that dream. 266 00:13:14,427 --> 00:13:18,531 Okay, I guess I can trust you guys. 267 00:13:18,598 --> 00:13:21,701 Charlie... Alan... 268 00:13:21,768 --> 00:13:24,071 I know this may sound totally crazy... 269 00:13:25,372 --> 00:13:28,741 ...but I work for a secret government agency, 270 00:13:28,808 --> 00:13:32,212 and my current mission is... 271 00:13:36,549 --> 00:13:38,085 I'm sorry. You should see your faces. 272 00:13:38,151 --> 00:13:39,920 You guys are so easy. 273 00:13:41,989 --> 00:13:44,024 All right, I'm going to go take a bath. 274 00:13:44,091 --> 00:13:46,259 Who wants to scrub my back? 275 00:13:47,394 --> 00:13:48,361 Too late! 276 00:13:50,597 --> 00:13:52,532 Sometimes I just crack me up. 277 00:13:55,936 --> 00:13:59,372 So... what do you got going for today? 278 00:13:59,439 --> 00:14:01,608 Nothing. I was just going to hang around the house. 279 00:14:01,674 --> 00:14:03,310 Yeah, me, too. 280 00:14:04,211 --> 00:14:05,913 No work? No errands? 281 00:14:05,979 --> 00:14:07,080 Not a thing. 282 00:14:07,147 --> 00:14:09,016 Maybe you could see a movie? 283 00:14:09,082 --> 00:14:11,018 I've seen a movie. 284 00:14:11,919 --> 00:14:13,820 Oh, come on, Alan. 285 00:14:13,887 --> 00:14:14,621 Why are you doing this? 286 00:14:14,687 --> 00:14:15,555 Doing what? 287 00:14:15,622 --> 00:14:16,890 Why don't you just admit 288 00:14:16,957 --> 00:14:18,358 that you're interested in Frankie. 289 00:14:18,425 --> 00:14:19,026 I'm not. 290 00:14:19,092 --> 00:14:20,693 You're not. 291 00:14:20,760 --> 00:14:23,563 Honest to God. 292 00:14:23,630 --> 00:14:24,631 Fine. 293 00:14:24,697 --> 00:14:27,634 But hypothetically... 294 00:14:27,700 --> 00:14:32,172 if I were interested in her, would you care? 295 00:14:32,239 --> 00:14:34,141 Of course I would. You're my brother. 296 00:14:34,207 --> 00:14:36,176 I don't want to see you get your feelings hurt. 297 00:14:36,243 --> 00:14:38,045 Aha! Aha. So you just assume 298 00:14:38,111 --> 00:14:40,213 that if we're both interested in the same woman, 299 00:14:40,280 --> 00:14:42,015 you would come out on top? 300 00:14:46,119 --> 00:14:47,320 Aren't you going to say anything? 301 00:14:47,387 --> 00:14:50,323 What? There was no question there. 302 00:14:50,390 --> 00:14:53,060 God, you are such an arrogant jerk. 303 00:14:53,126 --> 00:14:56,496 See, your feelings are hurt. 304 00:14:56,563 --> 00:14:58,231 My feelings are fine. 305 00:14:58,298 --> 00:14:59,466 I-I think the real issue here 306 00:14:59,532 --> 00:15:01,134 is Frankie clearly likes me better, 307 00:15:01,201 --> 00:15:02,535 and it's driving you crazy. 308 00:15:02,602 --> 00:15:04,337 No, no. 309 00:15:04,404 --> 00:15:06,439 What's driving me crazy is that you fought 310 00:15:06,506 --> 00:15:09,342 tooth and nail to keep "the lunatic" out of this house, 311 00:15:09,409 --> 00:15:11,211 but now that she's here, you want her. 312 00:15:11,278 --> 00:15:12,445 I never said I wanted her. 313 00:15:12,512 --> 00:15:13,513 But... 314 00:15:13,580 --> 00:15:15,382 you think that if you did want her, 315 00:15:15,448 --> 00:15:17,684 you could have her, even if I wanted her, too. 316 00:15:19,586 --> 00:15:21,321 Aren't you going to say something? 317 00:15:21,388 --> 00:15:24,024 There was no question there. 318 00:15:25,392 --> 00:15:27,327 Okay, fine, take your best shot, 319 00:15:27,394 --> 00:15:29,562 but let me just give you a little heads up. 320 00:15:29,629 --> 00:15:30,797 I am way out in front. 321 00:15:30,863 --> 00:15:32,365 Oh, yeah? How do you figure? 322 00:15:32,432 --> 00:15:35,635 Frankie and I have already discussed having sex. 323 00:15:40,107 --> 00:15:43,243 ( playing slow melody ) 324 00:15:46,946 --> 00:15:48,548 ( playing stops ) 325 00:15:48,615 --> 00:15:50,217 What are you doing? 326 00:15:51,118 --> 00:15:52,219 I just thought Frankie 327 00:15:52,285 --> 00:15:53,686 might like some fresh towels. 328 00:15:53,753 --> 00:15:56,323 I already gave her fresh towels. 329 00:15:57,390 --> 00:15:58,825 Really? 330 00:15:58,891 --> 00:16:03,230 Well, aren't you... Toweley Towellerson all of a sudden. 331 00:16:04,931 --> 00:16:07,100 You know, Alan, it's not my fault. 332 00:16:07,167 --> 00:16:08,401 What's not your fault? 333 00:16:08,468 --> 00:16:09,969 That I've always been more successful 334 00:16:10,037 --> 00:16:10,970 with women than you. 335 00:16:11,038 --> 00:16:12,405 Have been, Charlie, 336 00:16:12,472 --> 00:16:14,441 have been, but we're not teenagers anymore. 337 00:16:14,507 --> 00:16:15,875 You know, your-your "bad boy" act 338 00:16:15,942 --> 00:16:17,577 just might be wearing just a little thin. 339 00:16:17,644 --> 00:16:19,746 Or you just might be a little jealous. 340 00:16:19,812 --> 00:16:23,050 Jealous? ( snorts ) 341 00:16:23,116 --> 00:16:24,584 Don't... ( snorts )... me. 342 00:16:24,651 --> 00:16:27,454 Hey, when the occasion calls for... ( snorts ), 343 00:16:27,520 --> 00:16:29,622 I have every right to... ( snorts ). 344 00:16:32,392 --> 00:16:36,196 ( mimics elephant trumpeting ) 345 00:16:36,263 --> 00:16:38,698 What? I thought we were doing funny noises. 346 00:16:40,900 --> 00:16:43,703 That was an elephant. 347 00:16:43,770 --> 00:16:45,838 Oh, yeah, elephant, yeah. Well, it was good, yeah, really good. 348 00:16:45,905 --> 00:16:47,340 Anyway, I'm ready to go. 349 00:16:47,407 --> 00:16:49,376 Could one of you guys give me a ride? Absolutely. 350 00:16:49,442 --> 00:16:50,477 Sure. Great, who's driving? 351 00:16:50,543 --> 00:16:51,544 I will. Me. 352 00:16:52,712 --> 00:16:53,613 I've got the Jag. 353 00:16:53,680 --> 00:16:55,215 I've got the Volv...o. 354 00:16:55,282 --> 00:16:56,049 Mine's faster. 355 00:16:56,116 --> 00:16:58,351 Mine's safer. 356 00:16:58,418 --> 00:17:00,220 Why don't you stop competing with me? 357 00:17:00,287 --> 00:17:01,788 Why should I stop? I'm winning. 358 00:17:01,854 --> 00:17:03,123 Like hell you are. 359 00:17:03,190 --> 00:17:04,424 Like hell I am. Ask Frankie. 360 00:17:04,491 --> 00:17:05,825 Why don't you ask Frankie? 361 00:17:05,892 --> 00:17:06,793 I don't need to ask Frankie. 362 00:17:06,859 --> 00:17:08,095 What are you afraid of? 363 00:17:08,161 --> 00:17:09,796 I'm afraid I'm going to hit you so hard, 364 00:17:09,862 --> 00:17:10,963 I'll be an only child. 365 00:17:11,030 --> 00:17:12,132 Oh, yeah, bring it on. 366 00:17:12,199 --> 00:17:13,933 Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, stop it. 367 00:17:14,000 --> 00:17:15,368 Stop it! 368 00:17:15,435 --> 00:17:18,138 What is wrong with you two? You're family. 369 00:17:18,205 --> 00:17:19,472 You're brothers. 370 00:17:19,539 --> 00:17:22,041 Do you understand how precious that is? 371 00:17:22,109 --> 00:17:23,610 Do you have a clue 372 00:17:23,676 --> 00:17:25,912 the pain you feel when a family rips itself apart 373 00:17:25,978 --> 00:17:27,880 and there is no one to replace them? 374 00:17:27,947 --> 00:17:29,216 I mean, that's it, you know? 375 00:17:29,282 --> 00:17:32,885 You're all alone in the world and... 376 00:17:32,952 --> 00:17:35,122 and it's just so horrible. 377 00:17:36,456 --> 00:17:39,859 Um... it's okay, it's okay. 378 00:17:39,926 --> 00:17:41,494 Yeah, hey, look, we're not fighting. 379 00:17:41,561 --> 00:17:42,529 Yeah, yeah, 380 00:17:42,595 --> 00:17:44,764 we-we-we love each other, see, see? 381 00:17:46,266 --> 00:17:48,235 Yeah, and it-it doesn't matter who drives. 382 00:17:48,301 --> 00:17:50,270 You know, we'll- we'll both come. 383 00:17:50,337 --> 00:17:51,604 Good. Let's go. 384 00:17:58,111 --> 00:18:00,480 CHARLIE: Wow, nice house. 385 00:18:00,547 --> 00:18:02,949 Yeah. All right, I've just got to pick up a few things, 386 00:18:03,015 --> 00:18:05,585 and then I was hoping you could take me to the train station. 387 00:18:05,652 --> 00:18:08,488 Train station? Whe-Where you going? 388 00:18:08,555 --> 00:18:10,357 I don't know. I'll figure something out. 389 00:18:10,423 --> 00:18:12,125 If it helps any, you're welcome to stay with us 390 00:18:12,192 --> 00:18:13,126 for a couple more days. 391 00:18:13,193 --> 00:18:15,895 Oh... I couldn't impose. 392 00:18:15,962 --> 00:18:17,063 It's no imposition. 393 00:18:17,130 --> 00:18:18,064 Yeah. We like having you. 394 00:18:18,131 --> 00:18:19,432 Are you sure? 395 00:18:19,499 --> 00:18:21,401 It's settled. You're staying with us. 396 00:18:21,468 --> 00:18:24,904 Oh, man, how much do I love you guys? 397 00:18:24,971 --> 00:18:27,674 I'll be right back. 398 00:18:32,445 --> 00:18:35,282 What a nice girl. Yeah. 399 00:18:35,348 --> 00:18:37,150 Of course, we still don't know a damn thing about her. 400 00:18:37,217 --> 00:18:41,588 True... although that is one big-ass house she lives in... 401 00:18:41,654 --> 00:18:44,123 or is robbing. 402 00:18:45,558 --> 00:18:50,197 That would make us the, uh, the duped getaway drivers. 403 00:18:50,263 --> 00:18:52,965 Moron accessories to grand theft. 404 00:18:53,032 --> 00:18:55,902 That's a major felony. 405 00:18:55,968 --> 00:18:59,439 Oh, yeah. Hard time. 406 00:19:05,478 --> 00:19:08,348 I can't do hard time, Charlie. 407 00:19:08,415 --> 00:19:10,583 I have allergies. 408 00:19:10,650 --> 00:19:13,786 Yeah, that's going to be your biggest problem. 409 00:19:16,423 --> 00:19:18,558 FRANKIE: Watch your head, sweetheart. 410 00:19:19,926 --> 00:19:21,160 Hi. 411 00:19:21,228 --> 00:19:23,330 Hi. Hello. 412 00:19:23,396 --> 00:19:25,064 I'm Joanie. 413 00:19:25,131 --> 00:19:27,934 Hello. ALAN: Hi. 414 00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:29,202 Okay, we can go now. 415 00:19:29,269 --> 00:19:30,703 Where are we going, Mommy? 416 00:19:30,770 --> 00:19:33,406 We're going to Charlie and Alan's house, honey. 417 00:19:33,473 --> 00:19:35,742 It's a wonderful place where those awful people 418 00:19:35,808 --> 00:19:36,843 will never find us. 419 00:19:37,944 --> 00:19:39,612 You were right. 420 00:19:40,580 --> 00:19:43,850 We should've taken the Volvo. 421 00:19:53,092 --> 00:19:54,361 Are you guys gay? 422 00:19:55,628 --> 00:19:56,463 Unfit how? 423 00:19:56,529 --> 00:19:58,365 You know... ( squeals ) 424 00:19:58,431 --> 00:19:59,932 Okay, we got to get her out of here. 425 00:19:59,999 --> 00:20:02,602 You can take your damn money and stick it 426 00:20:02,669 --> 00:20:04,471 up your white bread, country club, 427 00:20:04,537 --> 00:20:07,474 tournament of roses, liposuctioned ass. 428 00:20:07,540 --> 00:20:09,609 I just met your brother's latest stuff. 429 00:20:09,676 --> 00:20:11,010 Why do you assume it's his stuff? 430 00:20:11,077 --> 00:20:12,111 What, is it yours? 431 00:20:12,178 --> 00:20:13,580 No, but it's not his, either. 432 00:20:13,646 --> 00:20:16,416 Hold on there, Pecos Bill. 433 00:20:16,483 --> 00:20:18,318 No, I like girls... 434 00:20:18,385 --> 00:20:20,453 I'm just not into eight year olds. 435 00:20:20,520 --> 00:20:23,623 The bad news is that wasn't my shrink's car. 436 00:20:23,690 --> 00:20:26,259 It's been so long since anybody's touched me. 437 00:20:28,628 --> 00:20:32,699 Come on... don't you want to spoon? 438 00:20:34,901 --> 00:20:37,003 Coffee? Coffee? 439 00:20:39,939 --> 00:20:42,642 I'm the extra guy. 440 00:20:42,709 --> 00:20:45,278 I'm wrapped tighter than an airport sandwich. 441 00:20:45,345 --> 00:20:49,015 Here, I'm running late. 442 00:20:49,081 --> 00:20:51,484 You're going to get laid tonight. 443 00:20:51,551 --> 00:20:55,021 Why doesn't she just kick me in the balls?