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Sync & corrections by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
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On the top of a hillside,
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deep in the mountains
of Shuturmurg, India,
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sits a mystical retreat
long sought out
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- by those seeking answers...
- Is this real?
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to the questions
that define us.
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I mean, is any of this real?
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How do I know what's real?
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NARRATOR:
This is Lindsay Bluth-Fünke.
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You see me before you, yes?
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I am real to you.
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And this bag next to me,
it is as real as you or me.
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No, I know that one's real.
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I meant the other one--
the Louis Vuitton.
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I don't remember Vuitton
having two E's.
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NARRATOR:
The hillside was also known
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- for their bargains on designer handbags.
- Oh, no!
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That's how they do it here.
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You can't go wrong.
Best bag on the mountain.
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I love this bag.
I give you 60 for it.
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- It's the best bag on the mountain.
- Excuse me.
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- I just promised it to her.
- I'll give you $70.
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NARRATOR:Lindsay Bluth had come
to India for both reasons.
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- Uh, $120. - You just bought
the best bag on the mountain.
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- Congratulations.
- Best bag on the mountain.
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(chuckles)
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NARRATOR:
Now the story of a family
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whose future
was abruptly canceled
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and the one daughter
who had no choice
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but to keep her life together.
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It's Lindsay's...
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- LINDSAY: I love it.
- NARRATOR: Lindsay was on
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a spiritual journey to let go
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of all possessions
and to find something cute
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- to keep her stuff in.
- It's gorgeous.
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Months earlier,
Lindsay had lost her bearings
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after finding out
she wasn't born
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to the family
she couldn't bear.
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- I'm adopted?
- So, after getting
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briefly creepy
with her brother...
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I'm just not that into
older women.
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- Don't worry about it.
- You bastard!
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She shared some resentments
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with her family
at the boat party.
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Kitty likes to scratch...
(yells)
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But before she could
disassociate herself
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- from the Bluth name...
- Because now I know that
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we're not related.
Anyway, Michael...
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Oh, my God. The SEC.
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...the Bluth name
would become...
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...as sullied as Newport Bay
on the fifth of May.
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LUCILLE:
They are persecuting me.
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It was an accident.
This is ridiculous!
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If I'd told them we were taking
a bunch of gays out there
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to get married,
they'd have thrown me a parade.
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Let's tell them we were taking
a bunch of gays to get married.
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Yeah, I don't think your record
on that issue
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is going to back that up, Mom.
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NARRATOR:
In fact, it was an issue
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of theBay Windowmagazine
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that would most damage her
with the gay community.
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LUCILLE: Fine. We'll say
they took it on a joyride.
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And you have no right
to criticize me.
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At least I was able
to turn myQueenaround.
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None taken.
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NARRATOR:
This is Tobias Fünke,
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who should have taken more.
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- Oh.
- LINDSAY: You cannot say
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one nice thing
to your daughter, can you?
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Adopted daughter.
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And that's not true.
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MAN: Could I have the Bluth
family over here, please?
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And over here, the victims
of the Bluth family?
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NARRATOR:
And that's when Lindsay
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found a label more fitting
than "Bluth."
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No, Lindsay, you're going
to the wrong area.
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Kenny, Chet, Curtis, Mike,
Bix and Gator are over here.
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We should be over here
at the Bluth area with Gob
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and Buster and, uh... uh...
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(sighs)
uh, your brother, uh...
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- Michael?
- Michael. Yes.
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Sorry. I was thinking
of Mike, the hot seaman.
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- No, where is Michael?
- It doesn't matter.
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He's not my brother.
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This isn't my family.
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No, I've spent years...
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Yes! Got my yes.
I got that big yes.
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I've spent years trying
to fit into this family,
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and it's not me.
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My life is a fallacy.
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Oh...
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♪ Is that a gal I see? ♪
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♪ No, it's just
a phallus... eee! ♪
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We loved that.
Where's that from?
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NARRATOR:
It's from nothing.
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But it made her
realize this, too.
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I don't know if there's
a right time to say this,
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but this marriage of ours,
it hasn't been working.
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Yeah... there's nothing
keeping us together.
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(Maeby coughing nearby)
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I... I believe we're thinking
the same thing.
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- Yeah, we should end it.
- Let's give it another shot.
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To the head. Kill it.
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Yes.
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NARRATOR: Lindsay was looking
for inspiration
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before she set out
on her new path.
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And it only took
until the "Pray" section
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of Eat, Pray, Love
for her to find it.
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Hmm.
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Soon, she was beginning
a journey to reinvent herself.
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Ugh. I'm doing it again.
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I have to let go
of these material things.
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NARRATOR: To leave the trappings
of her old life
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and try to live with less.
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(sighs) There.
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Her immersion
into Indian culture began
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even before reaching
the airport.
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And, uh...
and so this daily prayer,
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it connects one to the whole.
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- (bleep) anus tart.
- God.
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You know,
you sense the oneness in all.
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And they have
normal toilets, right?
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NARRATOR:
And after an hour or so
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withSkyMall,where she was
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proud of herself
for only buying two things--
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a self-cleaning litter box
in case she ever got a cat
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and an inflatable hat box
in case she ever got a hat--
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she got to a great article
in the in-flight magazine
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and found herself filling up
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with inner peace
and acceptance.
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- (thumping)
- I mean, not right away.
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What is she doing back there?
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- (passenger groaning)
- That passenger had been
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pushing on her seat
for like four hours.
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Lindsay's journey
to let go of her baggage
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got off to a bad start
at baggage claim
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when she picked up
the wrong baggage.
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And her Western notions
of the value of life
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were challenged on the bus ride
to the hotel.
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(man screams, loud thud)
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LINDSAY:
Oh, my God.
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Did... did we just
hit something?
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Shouldn't we stop?
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No. It wasn't a cow.
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- It was just a tourist.
- (laughter)
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NARRATOR:
And that's howLindsay's path
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- to living with less...
- Wait. This isn't my...
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How am I supposed to find out
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who I really am
dressed like this chick?
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...took a brief detour into
a shopping spree at India's
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- famous Mall Mountain.
- It's cute on me.
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But I thought it was
supposed to say "Kate."
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Oh, no, anything under a small
is considered
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a "David Spade."
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I love this jacket.
I'll give you 60 for it.
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Best coat on the mountain.
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- 65.
- 70! It'd look great
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on my wife or my sickly son.
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- 100 bucks. Yes!
- $100, yes.
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NARRATOR:
And soon, she was back
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at the hotel and ready
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- for her spiritual experience.
- (sighs)
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(bell dings)
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Yeah, hi.
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Uh, were you able
to book my 3:00 shaman?
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Oh, yes.
Did you want the deep wisdom
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or just a light ego cleanse?
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We do those by the pool.
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- There's a pool?
- WOMAN: It's hard to tell
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because there are
so many people in it,
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but yes, it is a pool.
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Well, yeah, by the pool, then.
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And, uh, do you think
you can get someone
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to remove the smell of lamb
from my room?
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Of course. And which
animal smell would you prefer?
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Which do you prefer?
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NARRATOR:
But at her 3:00 p.m. shaman...
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You are living a life
without love.
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- Lindsay got a deeper treatment
- How do I learn to...
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- than she had hoped for.
- be happy?
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You know, to love?
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When love is near your heart,
you'll be happy.
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You must live life truthfully.
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Yeah, no, I-I-I do live
truthfully,
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but, uh... (sighs)
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I'm just so full of passion.
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You are so full of (bleep).
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Yeah, yeah.
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Although, in my culture,
"full of (bleep)"
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is kind of like a dig.
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I mean, you'd never say it
to a customer.
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But, uh, yeah, no,
I-I know what you mean.
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This bag is as fake as you are.
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(sighs)
Well, how do I learn?
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Just look at the spelling.
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God. No, I...
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Pull your head out of the sand.
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Love is where you left it.
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You mean... back home?
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God.
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The only person back home
is Tobias.
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You have no children?
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NARRATOR:Lindsay thought
she was being hit on.
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No. Why do you ask?
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Wait a minute.
You're saying I've come
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halfway around the world
to find out
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I need to go back home?
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God, I haven't even gone
to the beach yet.
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NARRATOR:She had. It was just
too crowded to see the water.
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It was a moving experience,
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but after leaving the tent,
it wasn't just
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the shaman's words
that got through to her.
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It was this.
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00:08:04,629 --> 00:08:06,590
I'm sorry.
Your AmEx was declined.
215
00:08:06,631 --> 00:08:07,924
Your account is maxed out.
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00:08:07,966 --> 00:08:09,801
We had to cancel
your shaman appointment.
217
00:08:09,842 --> 00:08:11,719
No, no, I just talked
to the shaman,
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just right back at...
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MAN:
Get out! Get out!
220
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Go away! Get out!
Get out! Get out!
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I'm sorry to yell at you,
but as I said, it was declined.
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So get out.
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NARRATOR:
But, fortunately, the universe
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offered a solution
to her financial problem
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that wasn't too far off
from what her shaman had said.
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LUCILLE (over phone): Oh, I've
got money for you, sweetie,
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but it means my loving daughter
smiling next to her husband
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sitting behind me at the trial.
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LINDSAY:
Would you take a grimace?
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NARRATOR:So it was with
this dual intention
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00:08:45,086 --> 00:08:48,965
that she reached out
to a husband she'd left behind,
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with a new sense
of inner peace.
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00:08:51,468 --> 00:08:53,178
Of course, there was still
some outer stuff
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she needed to work through.
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(over phone):
Hello. It's Tobias.
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- Leave a message.
- (beep)
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00:08:57,056 --> 00:08:58,600
I'm ready to make this work.
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NARRATOR:It was with a sense
of enlightenmentthat Lindsay
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00:09:03,896 --> 00:09:05,815
returned from her
spiritual journey...
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00:09:05,857 --> 00:09:08,109
...to get her hands on
the stimulus money, too, right?
241
00:09:08,151 --> 00:09:09,653
Stop with the prayer hands.
242
00:09:09,694 --> 00:09:11,321
It just looks
like you're out of ideas.
243
00:09:11,363 --> 00:09:13,615
Seriously, shoot me
if you ever catch me doing that.
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00:09:13,657 --> 00:09:15,325
Says the least spiritual
man I know.
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00:09:15,367 --> 00:09:17,452
MICHAEL: What deal
did you strike with her?
246
00:09:17,494 --> 00:09:19,871
What part of her soul
did you buy?
247
00:09:19,912 --> 00:09:21,540
All I've asked
is that she testify
248
00:09:21,581 --> 00:09:24,417
that I was a wonderful mother
who did her best.
249
00:09:24,459 --> 00:09:25,793
So all of it.
250
00:09:25,835 --> 00:09:27,962
No, Michael.
I'm not a whore.
251
00:09:28,004 --> 00:09:29,381
I don't get any of the money
252
00:09:29,422 --> 00:09:30,840
until after I do
the disgusting thing.
253
00:09:30,882 --> 00:09:33,009
But I'm not here
just for the stimmy.
254
00:09:33,051 --> 00:09:34,678
I'm here
because a shaman told me
255
00:09:34,719 --> 00:09:36,888
that love is where I left it.
256
00:09:36,929 --> 00:09:38,598
Which, after much soul searching
257
00:09:38,640 --> 00:09:42,477
and by process of elimination,
is Tobias.
258
00:09:42,519 --> 00:09:44,688
TOBIAS:
I got the part.
259
00:09:45,938 --> 00:09:47,566
NARRATOR:
And so Lindsay and Tobias
260
00:09:47,607 --> 00:09:50,235
took another shot
at being husband and wife,
261
00:09:50,276 --> 00:09:52,070
and although they wouldn't
have money
262
00:09:52,111 --> 00:09:54,573
until after the perjury,
they set about
263
00:09:54,614 --> 00:09:56,658
- buying a home.
- Are you ready to make a move?
264
00:09:56,700 --> 00:10:00,662
As you can see,
I'm ready for a lot that's new.
265
00:10:00,704 --> 00:10:02,830
Oh! Good heavens!
266
00:10:02,872 --> 00:10:03,998
Right!
267
00:10:04,040 --> 00:10:05,458
Well, this is a great area.
268
00:10:05,500 --> 00:10:07,168
There's some wonderful
surgi-centers nearby.
269
00:10:07,210 --> 00:10:09,337
We're doing it.
We're really doing this.
270
00:10:09,379 --> 00:10:11,381
Yes! We're gonna get you
in the right house.
271
00:10:11,423 --> 00:10:13,550
And it's just the two of you?
You have no children?
272
00:10:13,592 --> 00:10:15,760
We don't.
273
00:10:15,801 --> 00:10:18,304
TOBIAS:
We should be honest here.
274
00:10:18,346 --> 00:10:19,598
We have no income flow.
275
00:10:19,639 --> 00:10:20,890
No incoming income flow.
276
00:10:20,932 --> 00:10:22,392
We have plenty
of outgoing income.
277
00:10:22,434 --> 00:10:24,102
No savings, no credit.
278
00:10:24,143 --> 00:10:25,395
I mean, we had some stimmy,
279
00:10:25,437 --> 00:10:27,813
but that went
to his hospital bills.
280
00:10:27,855 --> 00:10:30,191
But there's one thing
we do have--
281
00:10:30,233 --> 00:10:31,192
Work ethic!
282
00:10:31,234 --> 00:10:32,444
Right. No work ethic.
283
00:10:32,485 --> 00:10:33,778
But there's one thing
we do have--
284
00:10:33,819 --> 00:10:35,572
we do have a daughter.
285
00:10:35,614 --> 00:10:38,408
I was just on auto-pilot
before, when I said we didn't.
286
00:10:38,450 --> 00:10:39,825
I should have caught that;
yeah, but...
287
00:10:39,867 --> 00:10:41,411
MAEBY:
I could've spoken up,
288
00:10:41,453 --> 00:10:43,538
but I just wanted to see
if you guys got there.
289
00:10:43,580 --> 00:10:45,164
Well, you guys seem like
a great family.
290
00:10:45,206 --> 00:10:46,874
We have to be realistic.
291
00:10:46,916 --> 00:10:48,293
I'm in the real estate business.
292
00:10:48,334 --> 00:10:50,044
It's 2006.
293
00:10:50,086 --> 00:10:52,130
That's all good enough for me.
294
00:10:52,171 --> 00:10:53,673
We're gonna put you
in a NINJA loan.
295
00:10:53,715 --> 00:10:55,717
"No income, no jobs,
no assets."
296
00:10:55,759 --> 00:10:57,594
And you don't have to pay
a penny for two years.
297
00:10:57,636 --> 00:10:59,053
Oh, NINJA! Please!
298
00:10:59,095 --> 00:11:00,888
So we'll take something
cozy and intimate.
299
00:11:00,930 --> 00:11:03,349
- A one-bedroom.
- Or bigger.
300
00:11:03,391 --> 00:11:04,601
Yeah, how about something nice?
A three-bedroom?
301
00:11:04,643 --> 00:11:05,685
LINDSAY:
Three does sound bigger.
302
00:11:05,727 --> 00:11:07,437
Oh, it definitely is.
303
00:11:07,479 --> 00:11:09,397
NARRATOR:You have to remember
that this was a time
304
00:11:09,439 --> 00:11:11,566
when banks were eager to create
as much debt as possible.
305
00:11:11,608 --> 00:11:13,359
...the five-bedroom,
four-car garage.
306
00:11:13,401 --> 00:11:15,945
And I know that you guys
are going to be okay
307
00:11:15,987 --> 00:11:17,489
with just one master bathroom,
308
00:11:17,530 --> 00:11:20,158
because a lot of people
do prefer two.
309
00:11:20,199 --> 00:11:21,909
You know, they like
to just have it.
310
00:11:21,951 --> 00:11:23,869
Maybe separate, so we have it.
311
00:11:23,911 --> 00:11:25,413
So we have it.
That way we have it.
312
00:11:25,455 --> 00:11:26,581
That way you have it.
313
00:11:26,623 --> 00:11:27,957
Do you think
we really need one?
314
00:11:27,999 --> 00:11:29,417
I'm just gonna
interrupt for a second.
315
00:11:29,459 --> 00:11:31,210
You don't need a wine cellar,
316
00:11:31,252 --> 00:11:33,797
if you want to do wine tastings
in your butler's kitchen.
317
00:11:33,837 --> 00:11:35,923
I mean, this really isn't
what we discussed.
318
00:11:35,965 --> 00:11:38,802
Well, we didn't discuss
any of this, but, uh...
319
00:11:38,842 --> 00:11:41,179
yes, uh, I guess, that way,
we... we have it.
320
00:11:41,220 --> 00:11:42,430
Well... yeah...
321
00:11:42,472 --> 00:11:44,557
That way,
you'll definitely have it.
322
00:11:44,599 --> 00:11:47,435
And then once you have it,
that way, you'll have it.
323
00:11:47,477 --> 00:11:49,771
But do we need a gatehouse?
324
00:11:49,813 --> 00:11:53,024
I just put John Beard into a
house with a double gatehouse.
325
00:11:53,065 --> 00:11:55,485
Now, that's John Beard;
he's on television.
326
00:11:55,527 --> 00:11:56,944
No one's gonna look down on you
327
00:11:56,986 --> 00:11:58,904
just 'cause you have less
than John Beard.
328
00:11:58,946 --> 00:12:00,657
- Is this crazy?
- I think so.
329
00:12:00,699 --> 00:12:02,158
We'll take
the double gatehouse.
330
00:12:02,200 --> 00:12:03,867
Oh, is that what you thought?
Because...
331
00:12:03,909 --> 00:12:05,495
- Well, that way, we'll have it.
- We have it. We have it.
332
00:12:05,537 --> 00:12:07,079
And that way, you have it.
333
00:12:07,121 --> 00:12:08,164
There was a lot of this
going on back then.
334
00:12:08,206 --> 00:12:10,249
This way, we have it.
335
00:12:10,291 --> 00:12:12,001
And soon, they were
starting their new life
336
00:12:12,043 --> 00:12:14,920
- Good point!
- in their new, beautiful home.
337
00:12:14,962 --> 00:12:16,673
LINDSAY:
Mother's Day Eve
338
00:12:16,715 --> 00:12:18,924
was the most joyous day
of the year.
339
00:12:18,966 --> 00:12:21,093
(echoing): Maeby, you're gonna
be late for school.
340
00:12:21,135 --> 00:12:23,137
NARRATOR:And what they lost
in coziness...
341
00:12:23,179 --> 00:12:24,848
God, they grow up so slowly.
342
00:12:24,888 --> 00:12:27,891
...they made up for in
cavernous, unfurnished space.
343
00:12:27,933 --> 00:12:31,145
- And the robot's dead again.
- Oh! Poor little guy.
344
00:12:31,187 --> 00:12:35,191
Ran out of juice before
he could reach his...
345
00:12:35,233 --> 00:12:36,651
(door slams)
346
00:12:36,693 --> 00:12:38,444
With her mother's
trial coming up,
347
00:12:38,486 --> 00:12:41,865
Lindsay made an effort
to work on her testimony.
348
00:12:41,905 --> 00:12:43,199
...when I was hungry, I...
349
00:12:43,241 --> 00:12:45,410
- (Lindsay laughs)
- Go on.
350
00:12:45,451 --> 00:12:47,953
You don't want me to say
this next part, do you?
351
00:12:47,995 --> 00:12:49,581
I think it tells the story.
352
00:12:49,622 --> 00:12:52,751
But am I
accidentally being funny,
353
00:12:52,792 --> 00:12:55,169
or am I purposely being funny?
354
00:12:55,211 --> 00:12:56,629
It's not supposed to be funny.
355
00:12:56,671 --> 00:12:59,298
"Suckled at her champagne
glass breasts"?
356
00:12:59,340 --> 00:13:00,383
Is it a joke?
357
00:13:00,425 --> 00:13:01,593
Buster wrote it.
358
00:13:01,634 --> 00:13:03,052
Recently?
359
00:13:03,094 --> 00:13:05,304
I adapted it from a letter
he wrote from camp.
360
00:13:05,346 --> 00:13:06,806
I miss you, Mommy.
361
00:13:06,848 --> 00:13:08,266
Camp is scary at times.
362
00:13:08,307 --> 00:13:09,975
When I was cold, you clothed me,
363
00:13:10,017 --> 00:13:11,477
when I was hungry...
364
00:13:11,519 --> 00:13:13,937
Uh, how do I say this?
365
00:13:13,979 --> 00:13:17,483
Suckled at your champagne
glass breasts.
366
00:13:17,525 --> 00:13:19,068
Oh, that's good.
367
00:13:19,110 --> 00:13:20,612
It doesn't matter.
I'll be proofing it, anyway.
368
00:13:20,653 --> 00:13:21,863
LINDSAY:
Oh, God.
369
00:13:21,905 --> 00:13:24,407
This is from
Camp Kiss-A-Me-Mommy?
370
00:13:24,449 --> 00:13:26,701
Just read the copy.
You're getting paid for this.
371
00:13:26,743 --> 00:13:27,786
No. You know what?
372
00:13:27,827 --> 00:13:28,994
The money is not
important to me.
373
00:13:29,036 --> 00:13:30,413
My shaman said...
374
00:13:30,455 --> 00:13:33,625
Oh, don't give me that
mystical nonsense.
375
00:13:33,666 --> 00:13:35,710
You think you're
better than I am.
376
00:13:35,752 --> 00:13:38,296
But you're a lot more like me
than you think you are.
377
00:13:38,337 --> 00:13:40,757
Now, let's take it from:
378
00:13:40,799 --> 00:13:43,718
"I hope she gives me
bubble baths forever."
379
00:13:43,760 --> 00:13:45,720
And I want to smell the suds.
380
00:13:45,762 --> 00:13:48,013
But worse news was
around the corner.
381
00:13:48,055 --> 00:13:50,266
BEARD:The collapse of the
California housing market
382
00:13:50,308 --> 00:13:51,810
is taking a personal toll...
383
00:13:51,851 --> 00:13:53,812
- Uh-oh.
- ...with layoffs here at the station.
384
00:13:53,853 --> 00:13:55,855
In addition,
I'm leaving the keys
385
00:13:55,897 --> 00:13:57,941
to my 10,000-square-foot home
in Harbor Shallows
386
00:13:57,981 --> 00:14:00,109
- here on the desk...
- TOBIAS: Well, it probably
387
00:14:00,151 --> 00:14:01,444
shouldn't affect our area.
388
00:14:01,486 --> 00:14:02,779
He's over by
where the fountain is.
389
00:14:02,821 --> 00:14:03,905
BEARD:
Might I say to them
390
00:14:03,947 --> 00:14:05,657
good luck getting that (bleep)
391
00:14:05,698 --> 00:14:07,617
raccoon smell
out of the gatehouse,
392
00:14:07,659 --> 00:14:10,161
because I never could.
393
00:14:10,202 --> 00:14:12,163
But you and I are okay, right?
394
00:14:12,204 --> 00:14:14,165
I mean, this works, right?
395
00:14:14,206 --> 00:14:15,792
Never better.
396
00:14:18,210 --> 00:14:20,839
And the week
of Lucille's trial,
397
00:14:20,880 --> 00:14:22,715
they got some even worse news.
398
00:14:22,757 --> 00:14:25,551
What's this?
Mother's not going to pay?
399
00:14:25,593 --> 00:14:27,470
She actually said
she'd only pay me
400
00:14:27,512 --> 00:14:29,054
if my testimony is believable.
401
00:14:29,096 --> 00:14:30,556
Lindsay! Lindsay!
402
00:14:30,598 --> 00:14:32,099
...but how am I supposed
to say something like
403
00:14:32,141 --> 00:14:33,100
"I love you, Mother!"
404
00:14:33,142 --> 00:14:35,269
and sound believable?
405
00:14:35,311 --> 00:14:37,605
Well, geez... Jesus C. Penny!
406
00:14:37,647 --> 00:14:39,482
You know,
I wish I had the luxury
407
00:14:39,524 --> 00:14:41,359
of not sounding believable.
408
00:14:41,400 --> 00:14:44,028
But that's not an option for
an out-of-work actor, is it?
409
00:14:44,069 --> 00:14:46,197
Or it's why you're out of work!
410
00:14:46,238 --> 00:14:49,784
Well, I beg one's pardon,
but I have been dying to go
411
00:14:49,826 --> 00:14:52,704
to that Method Acting Clinic
that I see on my nightly drives,
412
00:14:52,745 --> 00:14:54,246
but you won't let me!
413
00:14:54,288 --> 00:14:56,415
Because you already
wasted all that money
414
00:14:56,457 --> 00:14:58,793
on Carl Weathers'
Master Acting Class.
415
00:14:58,835 --> 00:15:01,921
Well, I'm sorry,
but I'm such a star (bleep)
416
00:15:01,963 --> 00:15:04,883
that I didn't pay attention
to anything he said!
417
00:15:04,924 --> 00:15:08,219
Oh, well then, maybe I should go
to your Method Acting Class,
418
00:15:08,260 --> 00:15:10,304
to make my testimony
more believable!
419
00:15:10,346 --> 00:15:11,681
That's actually a good idea.
420
00:15:11,723 --> 00:15:14,141
Maybe you could--
Oh! Hi. Yes.
421
00:15:14,183 --> 00:15:16,602
Well, perhaps we should
go together.
422
00:15:16,644 --> 00:15:19,981
Yeah. Might be good
for us, as a couple.
423
00:15:20,023 --> 00:15:21,816
I do hope so.
424
00:15:21,858 --> 00:15:24,109
I really want
to make this work.
425
00:15:24,151 --> 00:15:25,862
Me, too.
426
00:15:25,904 --> 00:15:28,155
I really love you, Tobias.
427
00:15:28,197 --> 00:15:29,866
Oh, Lindsay, we have
428
00:15:29,908 --> 00:15:32,618
got to get you to
that acting clinic.
429
00:15:32,660 --> 00:15:35,371
And that was with me
picturing fudge.
430
00:15:35,413 --> 00:15:36,956
Fudge.
431
00:15:41,293 --> 00:15:43,087
NARRATOR:
To bond with her husband
432
00:15:43,128 --> 00:15:45,423
and prepare for her testimony,
433
00:15:45,464 --> 00:15:48,300
Lindsay had decided to attend
an acting class with Tobias.
434
00:15:48,342 --> 00:15:49,886
This is the first time
435
00:15:49,928 --> 00:15:51,387
I've actually done something
like this with you.
436
00:15:51,429 --> 00:15:53,264
I think I always
kind of looked down on it.
437
00:15:53,305 --> 00:15:55,182
You know, Lindsay, I think
you'll find that
438
00:15:55,224 --> 00:15:57,602
some of what used to seem
clueless about me
439
00:15:57,643 --> 00:16:00,312
is actually something
I'm quite good at.
440
00:16:00,354 --> 00:16:03,190
This... is where I belong.
441
00:16:03,232 --> 00:16:05,068
If you're new here,
you need to go to the window.
442
00:16:05,109 --> 00:16:06,694
Uh, fill out this form first.
443
00:16:06,736 --> 00:16:08,947
And there's some personal
questions on it, like, uh,
444
00:16:08,988 --> 00:16:10,197
how you first got hooked.
445
00:16:10,239 --> 00:16:11,574
Well, that's an easy one:
446
00:16:11,616 --> 00:16:12,825
You're A Good Man,
Charlie Brown.
447
00:16:12,867 --> 00:16:14,326
(Tobias chuckles)
448
00:16:14,368 --> 00:16:15,578
No, uh, no,Mame.
449
00:16:15,620 --> 00:16:16,829
No, ma'am...?
450
00:16:16,871 --> 00:16:18,247
You're A Good Man...
451
00:16:18,289 --> 00:16:19,707
You're A Good Man,
Charlie Brown.
452
00:16:19,749 --> 00:16:20,959
(whispering):
Gypsy. Gypsy.
453
00:16:21,000 --> 00:16:22,251
CLINICIAN:
Just come up here and be
454
00:16:22,293 --> 00:16:24,045
as truthful as possible.
455
00:16:24,087 --> 00:16:26,965
WOMAN: Okay, this is (bleep)
overwhelming.
456
00:16:27,006 --> 00:16:28,382
They're starting the monologues.
457
00:16:28,424 --> 00:16:30,927
I think this is from
Songs for My Father.
458
00:16:30,969 --> 00:16:32,219
WOMAN: This (bleep) is
(bleep) up, right?
459
00:16:32,261 --> 00:16:33,554
LINDSAY:
What did you say
460
00:16:33,596 --> 00:16:34,639
the name of this acting class
was again?
461
00:16:34,680 --> 00:16:35,807
TOBIAS:
Method One Clinic.
462
00:16:35,848 --> 00:16:37,850
Okay, I'm gonna go get coffee.
463
00:16:37,892 --> 00:16:40,436
Garden Grove Method One Clinic.
464
00:16:40,478 --> 00:16:42,772
And moments later,
as Lindsay, once again,
465
00:16:42,814 --> 00:16:46,358
found herself questioning
her husband's choices,
466
00:16:46,400 --> 00:16:47,443
one of hers was questioned.
467
00:16:47,485 --> 00:16:48,903
MAN:
Ugh! That's not Free Trade,
468
00:16:48,945 --> 00:16:50,655
and if it's not Free Trade,
it's (bleep).
469
00:16:50,696 --> 00:16:52,364
- I wouldn't...
- (scoffs)
470
00:16:52,406 --> 00:16:54,075
You don't look like a junkie.
471
00:16:54,117 --> 00:16:55,910
You do. What do you weigh,
like, 90 pounds?
472
00:16:55,952 --> 00:16:57,078
(laughs)
473
00:16:57,120 --> 00:16:58,121
That's so funny!
474
00:16:58,162 --> 00:16:59,664
God, um... thank you.
475
00:16:59,705 --> 00:17:01,206
But-but no, no.
476
00:17:01,248 --> 00:17:03,042
If I'm addicted to anything,
it's alcohol.
477
00:17:03,084 --> 00:17:04,376
I'm Lindsay.
478
00:17:04,418 --> 00:17:07,421
And you're... hmm!
"Bitéme."
479
00:17:07,463 --> 00:17:10,008
No, I don't like giving my name
to any state organization,
480
00:17:10,049 --> 00:17:11,968
especially after I got kicked
off the voter rolls,
481
00:17:12,010 --> 00:17:14,470
'cause I accidentally signed up
for the wrong political group.
482
00:17:14,512 --> 00:17:16,514
Wow.
What group was that?
483
00:17:16,555 --> 00:17:18,808
You know, I don't even remember.
484
00:17:18,850 --> 00:17:20,768
Just some guy in a booth
on the boardwalk.
485
00:17:20,810 --> 00:17:22,394
He joined Al Qaeda.
486
00:17:22,436 --> 00:17:23,562
MAN: And I only signed up
'cause he was giving away
487
00:17:23,604 --> 00:17:25,064
a free beard brush.
488
00:17:25,106 --> 00:17:27,150
...that says "Al Qaeda" on it.
489
00:17:27,191 --> 00:17:30,028
But maybe he thought it was
the designer of the brush.
490
00:17:30,069 --> 00:17:31,403
I'm Marky Bark.
491
00:17:31,445 --> 00:17:33,238
Of the tree-freer Barks?
492
00:17:33,280 --> 00:17:35,366
Marky was the son
of Johnny Bark,
493
00:17:35,407 --> 00:17:38,243
an activist that Lindsay
had once helped save,
494
00:17:38,285 --> 00:17:40,412
and then kill, a tree.
495
00:17:40,454 --> 00:17:41,664
LINDSAY:Oh, my God!
I remember him!
496
00:17:41,706 --> 00:17:42,915
I remember thinking, one day,
497
00:17:42,957 --> 00:17:44,542
he was just gonna
fall out of a tree
498
00:17:44,583 --> 00:17:45,543
and break his neck.
499
00:17:45,584 --> 00:17:47,003
Whatever happened to him?
500
00:17:47,045 --> 00:17:48,212
He fell out of a tree
and broke his neck.
501
00:17:48,253 --> 00:17:49,296
Oh, God...
502
00:17:49,338 --> 00:17:50,381
No, I'm just kidding.
503
00:17:50,422 --> 00:17:52,175
- (laughs)
- Oh...
504
00:17:52,216 --> 00:17:53,258
So how is he?
505
00:17:53,300 --> 00:17:54,301
Oh, he's dead.
506
00:17:54,343 --> 00:17:56,261
But natural causes.
507
00:17:56,303 --> 00:17:57,847
A bunch of deranged bees
chased him out of a tree
508
00:17:57,889 --> 00:17:59,015
and he fell to his death.
509
00:17:59,057 --> 00:18:00,349
So, are you here alone, or...?
510
00:18:00,391 --> 00:18:01,559
No, I'm with her.
511
00:18:01,600 --> 00:18:04,311
She's a committee member.
512
00:18:04,353 --> 00:18:06,147
Which committee is that?
513
00:18:06,189 --> 00:18:07,648
Itty-bitty (bleep).
514
00:18:07,690 --> 00:18:10,234
What a wonderful sense of humor.
515
00:18:10,275 --> 00:18:12,778
Listen, the only time DeBrie
can keep food down
516
00:18:12,820 --> 00:18:14,279
is for about 20 minutes
after she comes crashing
517
00:18:14,321 --> 00:18:15,489
off the methadone, so...
518
00:18:15,531 --> 00:18:17,033
- Oh...
- would you care to join us
519
00:18:17,075 --> 00:18:18,617
as we rustle up some grub
520
00:18:18,659 --> 00:18:20,494
to shove down our mouths?
521
00:18:20,536 --> 00:18:22,246
I would like that very much.
522
00:18:22,287 --> 00:18:24,248
So Tobias and Lindsay drove
523
00:18:24,289 --> 00:18:26,375
to meet their
new friends for lunch.
524
00:18:26,417 --> 00:18:28,878
They are such a neat couple!
525
00:18:28,920 --> 00:18:30,504
Aren't they neat!
526
00:18:30,546 --> 00:18:32,048
It's so fun to have another
couple to go out with.
527
00:18:32,090 --> 00:18:33,591
LINDSAY:
He's amazing.
528
00:18:33,632 --> 00:18:35,927
I mean, so passionate
about real issues.
529
00:18:35,968 --> 00:18:38,179
He's a real activist--
like me.
530
00:18:38,221 --> 00:18:40,973
And she's a real actress,
like me!
531
00:18:41,015 --> 00:18:43,059
Oh, she used to be
in big movies,
532
00:18:43,101 --> 00:18:45,269
but then, like a lot of actors,
the teeth go...
533
00:18:45,310 --> 00:18:46,395
Mm!
534
00:18:46,437 --> 00:18:47,605
But she is the perfect age
535
00:18:47,646 --> 00:18:50,233
to be a Hollywood actress--42.
536
00:18:50,274 --> 00:18:51,483
Is that all?
537
00:18:51,525 --> 00:18:52,944
Oh, I think this is the place.
538
00:18:52,985 --> 00:18:55,029
It's a barter restaurant.
539
00:18:55,071 --> 00:18:56,989
Marky doesn't believe in money.
540
00:18:57,031 --> 00:18:59,033
Do I like barter?
541
00:18:59,075 --> 00:19:01,160
No, it means
they don't deal with money.
542
00:19:01,202 --> 00:19:02,828
That's why I swiped
that methadone tray.
543
00:19:02,870 --> 00:19:04,496
Hmm.
544
00:19:04,538 --> 00:19:06,791
What interesting friends
we've made.
545
00:19:06,832 --> 00:19:09,877
I think this is exactly
what our marriage needed.
546
00:19:16,634 --> 00:19:17,718
NARRATOR:
Lindsay and Tobias gathered
547
00:19:17,760 --> 00:19:19,137
with their new friends...
548
00:19:19,178 --> 00:19:20,263
WAITRESS: Hi, y'all!
This your first time...?
549
00:19:20,304 --> 00:19:22,723
...at CW Swappigans,
550
00:19:22,765 --> 00:19:25,392
a chain that sprung up
after the economic collapse.
551
00:19:25,434 --> 00:19:28,687
We are like a Salvation Army
meets a soup kitchen,
552
00:19:28,729 --> 00:19:30,439
meets a gastro pub,
553
00:19:30,481 --> 00:19:33,776
meets a Marxist-or
Leninist-type social structure.
554
00:19:33,818 --> 00:19:35,527
These are things
that you can order
555
00:19:35,569 --> 00:19:37,529
and these are things
that we will accept.
556
00:19:37,571 --> 00:19:40,658
As you see on the bottom,
we don't have the fish,
557
00:19:40,699 --> 00:19:42,367
and we're not taking
any more lava lamps.
558
00:19:42,409 --> 00:19:44,829
Uh-oh!
I can see this one's got
559
00:19:44,870 --> 00:19:46,413
that deer
in the headlights look!
560
00:19:46,455 --> 00:19:48,874
Oh, no.
He just took some methadone.
561
00:19:48,916 --> 00:19:52,044
He thought he was driving,
with a cocktail tray.
562
00:19:52,086 --> 00:19:53,671
Oh, speaking of that...
563
00:19:53,712 --> 00:19:55,798
How about mozzarella sticks
for the table?
564
00:19:55,840 --> 00:19:59,010
Cocktail tray, light scratching,
for mozzarella sticks.
565
00:19:59,051 --> 00:20:01,720
Six, no sauce.
566
00:20:01,762 --> 00:20:04,640
And maybe some sparkling water
for the table.
567
00:20:04,682 --> 00:20:06,976
Oh, I'm sorry, sir. We're no
longer taking hotel soaps.
568
00:20:07,018 --> 00:20:08,519
LINDSAY:
This is fun.
569
00:20:08,560 --> 00:20:10,604
MARKY:
A lot of people couldn't handle
570
00:20:10,646 --> 00:20:12,439
a Dumpster dive
for their first double date.
571
00:20:12,481 --> 00:20:15,484
Is that what this is?
572
00:20:16,777 --> 00:20:18,112
Now, wait... wait a second.
573
00:20:18,154 --> 00:20:20,614
I wasn't driving?
574
00:20:20,656 --> 00:20:23,117
It's just so refreshing
to meet people
575
00:20:23,159 --> 00:20:26,078
with real passion
about changing the status quo.
576
00:20:26,120 --> 00:20:30,374
Lindsay and I
don't have a single friend.
577
00:20:30,415 --> 00:20:31,625
Is the food here yet?
578
00:20:31,667 --> 00:20:34,419
I'm not hungry,
but... but, uh...
579
00:20:34,461 --> 00:20:36,922
- Oh, look, it's butter.
- MARKY: DeBrie.
580
00:20:36,964 --> 00:20:38,966
(whooping)
581
00:20:39,008 --> 00:20:40,634
MARKY:
DeBrie, that's our butter.
582
00:20:40,676 --> 00:20:42,970
We were going to swap it
for dessert.
583
00:20:43,012 --> 00:20:45,056
No, she's improvising.
Uh, yes, ma'am.
584
00:20:45,097 --> 00:20:47,099
You seem to be liking
that butter substitute
585
00:20:47,141 --> 00:20:48,392
at Swappigans.
586
00:20:48,433 --> 00:20:49,852
Uh, yes, and...
587
00:20:49,894 --> 00:20:52,104
wh-what else could you swap for?
588
00:20:52,146 --> 00:20:54,523
Uh, yes, and... uh...
589
00:20:54,565 --> 00:20:55,983
Oh, I'm out. She's too good.
590
00:20:56,025 --> 00:20:57,568
I... I don't know who my guy is.
591
00:20:57,609 --> 00:20:59,028
I don't... I don't have a guy.
592
00:20:59,070 --> 00:21:00,404
MARKY:
No, she just likes butter.
593
00:21:00,445 --> 00:21:02,073
Come on, let's get you
cleaned up.
594
00:21:02,114 --> 00:21:03,490
- Don't touch anything.
- Marky, I'll take her.
595
00:21:03,532 --> 00:21:04,825
You two just got here.
596
00:21:04,867 --> 00:21:06,535
Have a chat about.
I'll clean her up.
597
00:21:06,577 --> 00:21:08,329
- TOBIAS: Come on, DeBrie.
- DeBRIE: Num, num, num, num.
598
00:21:08,371 --> 00:21:09,830
- I'm sorry.
- Don't be.
599
00:21:09,872 --> 00:21:11,332
I-I love it here.
600
00:21:11,374 --> 00:21:13,500
My mother would hate this place.
601
00:21:13,542 --> 00:21:15,294
You know, Lindsay,
I-I have to tell you,
602
00:21:15,336 --> 00:21:17,588
when I first met you,
I thought you were one of those
603
00:21:17,629 --> 00:21:21,425
typical, uptight, snobby,
Newport Beach,
604
00:21:21,466 --> 00:21:23,552
vapid... nut-busters!
605
00:21:25,804 --> 00:21:27,056
You know, one of those monsters
606
00:21:27,098 --> 00:21:28,599
that lives in
a 10,000-square-foot house
607
00:21:28,640 --> 00:21:30,101
that they destroyed
the wetlands for.
608
00:21:30,142 --> 00:21:31,810
Those were wetlands?
609
00:21:31,852 --> 00:21:34,272
(sighs) That explains
our Thanksgiving miracle.
610
00:21:34,313 --> 00:21:35,856
What do you mean,
you didn't make dinner?
611
00:21:35,898 --> 00:21:37,566
I didn't realize
it was Thursday, okay?
612
00:21:37,608 --> 00:21:39,318
There's got to be
something here.
613
00:21:39,360 --> 00:21:40,694
(gasps, screams)
614
00:21:40,736 --> 00:21:42,196
TOBIAS:
Oh! Oh!
615
00:21:42,238 --> 00:21:44,031
Oh! Get it! Get it!
616
00:21:44,073 --> 00:21:45,741
Chase it into the oven!
617
00:21:45,783 --> 00:21:48,077
Come on. Come on.
Here, little ducky.
618
00:21:48,119 --> 00:21:49,828
- That's a good duck.
- Good duck.
619
00:21:49,870 --> 00:21:52,290
- In you go!
- (loud quacking)
620
00:21:52,331 --> 00:21:55,626
This is going to be
the greatest Thanksgiving ever.
621
00:21:55,667 --> 00:21:57,878
It's a miracle!
622
00:21:57,920 --> 00:21:59,588
Well, I actually do live
623
00:21:59,630 --> 00:22:01,340
in a fairly large house
right now.
624
00:22:01,382 --> 00:22:02,967
But we've never made
a payment on it.
625
00:22:03,008 --> 00:22:04,551
So you're sticking it
to Big Banking.
626
00:22:04,593 --> 00:22:06,720
- That's cool.
- Yes.
627
00:22:06,762 --> 00:22:08,639
In fact, I'm only in America
628
00:22:08,680 --> 00:22:10,349
because a shaman told me
that love
629
00:22:10,391 --> 00:22:12,601
would come to me
when I accepted who I am
630
00:22:12,643 --> 00:22:14,519
- and didn't run away.
- Sounds like a good shaman.
631
00:22:14,561 --> 00:22:17,606
Oh, he was the house shaman
at the Four Seasons Mumbai,
632
00:22:17,648 --> 00:22:20,483
so you figure
he's got to be pretty good.
633
00:22:20,525 --> 00:22:23,404
Oh, and he turned into
an ostrich at the end, so...
634
00:22:23,446 --> 00:22:25,823
They're not going to have that
at the Embassy Suites.
635
00:22:25,864 --> 00:22:28,909
That's funny.
I actually run an ostrich farm.
636
00:22:28,951 --> 00:22:33,205
(Indian music playing):
♪ Co... incidence! ♪
637
00:22:33,247 --> 00:22:35,291
That's not a coincidence.
638
00:22:35,333 --> 00:22:37,584
♪ Yes, it is. ♪
639
00:22:37,626 --> 00:22:39,837
MAN:
Mini pizzas, no pepperoni!
640
00:22:39,878 --> 00:22:41,297
Marky, I've got to tell you,
641
00:22:41,339 --> 00:22:42,965
talking about these
social issues, it's...
642
00:22:43,007 --> 00:22:45,550
the first time I've felt
like myself
643
00:22:45,592 --> 00:22:47,178
in a really long time.
644
00:22:47,219 --> 00:22:50,055
That's because I say
what I mean, I do what I feel.
645
00:22:50,097 --> 00:22:51,474
No lies.
646
00:22:51,514 --> 00:22:52,933
NARRATOR:
Lindsay felt guilty
647
00:22:52,975 --> 00:22:54,810
because she was about
to go enter
648
00:22:54,852 --> 00:22:56,854
a crab house/courtroom
and do just that.
649
00:22:56,895 --> 00:22:58,314
That's why my motto is:
650
00:22:58,356 --> 00:23:01,025
"Live truthfully
and skate through life."
651
00:23:01,066 --> 00:23:04,153
Marky felt guilty
because it wasn't his motto.
652
00:23:04,195 --> 00:23:07,198
It was the motto of a surf
and skateboard company.
653
00:23:07,239 --> 00:23:08,407
Live truthfully.
654
00:23:08,449 --> 00:23:09,950
Skate through life.
655
00:23:11,035 --> 00:23:12,535
That's amazing.
656
00:23:12,577 --> 00:23:14,038
I haven't felt this deep
657
00:23:14,079 --> 00:23:17,249
a connection with someone
in a long, long time.
658
00:23:20,878 --> 00:23:22,671
Other than DeBrie.
659
00:23:22,713 --> 00:23:24,631
I can't believe
we just did that.
660
00:23:24,673 --> 00:23:26,591
I can't believe how little give
your teeth have.
661
00:23:26,633 --> 00:23:28,677
So, where do you keep
your ostriches?
662
00:23:28,719 --> 00:23:30,012
WAITRESS: Sheraton mini soap
for a taco salad?
663
00:23:30,054 --> 00:23:31,763
MAN:
We don't take hotel soap!
664
00:23:31,805 --> 00:23:33,724
And perhaps it was
to get back at her mother...
665
00:23:33,765 --> 00:23:36,185
- Leave a tip! Leave a tip!
- ...or to get out of
666
00:23:36,227 --> 00:23:38,854
a relationship that had
been over for a long time,
667
00:23:38,896 --> 00:23:40,856
but that's when
Lindsay hopped off
668
00:23:40,898 --> 00:23:44,026
to pursue a life
she felt was her destiny.
669
00:23:44,068 --> 00:23:46,611
And the new lovers
discovered each other.
670
00:23:46,653 --> 00:23:48,989
The beautiful female body,
671
00:23:49,031 --> 00:23:51,242
the horrible male.
672
00:23:56,872 --> 00:23:59,291
Wow. That was so...
673
00:23:59,333 --> 00:24:01,168
- fast.
- Thanks.
674
00:24:01,210 --> 00:24:03,754
Well, I didn't know how long
we'd be stuck in traffic, so...
675
00:24:03,795 --> 00:24:05,297
- (horn honking)
- Oh! And it sounds
676
00:24:05,339 --> 00:24:07,550
- like it's moving, so...
- MAN: Move it!
677
00:24:07,590 --> 00:24:08,633
- (horn honking)
- Come on! Come on!
678
00:24:08,675 --> 00:24:10,844
- Let's go!
- Careful!
679
00:24:10,886 --> 00:24:14,181
And as they drove, they learned
so much about each other.
680
00:24:14,223 --> 00:24:16,641
MARKY:I was always just
in such a rush to grow up
681
00:24:16,683 --> 00:24:19,019
and change this world,
and foolishly,
682
00:24:19,061 --> 00:24:21,397
the teeth I pulled
were my adult teeth,
683
00:24:21,439 --> 00:24:24,191
so this guy all the way
to that guy back there,
684
00:24:24,233 --> 00:24:26,485
that's a... just a piece
of wood I stick in there.
685
00:24:26,527 --> 00:24:27,945
I mean, they're just
chewing tools.
686
00:24:27,986 --> 00:24:29,696
(laughs)
I don't care about looks.
687
00:24:29,738 --> 00:24:31,949
But you find me pretty,
though, right?
688
00:24:31,990 --> 00:24:33,242
No.
689
00:24:33,284 --> 00:24:34,910
I have no idea
what you look like.
690
00:24:34,952 --> 00:24:36,703
I have this condition
called face blindness.
691
00:24:36,745 --> 00:24:38,747
I mean, I can tell
you're a woman.
692
00:24:38,789 --> 00:24:40,165
(chuckling):
Oh, stop.
693
00:24:40,207 --> 00:24:42,667
But, honestly, no,
all I see is, like,
694
00:24:42,709 --> 00:24:46,130
eyes and nose, you know,
hair, ears and...
695
00:24:46,171 --> 00:24:48,549
But I can tell you got
a great heart, Lindsay.
696
00:24:48,591 --> 00:24:50,593
I can tell
you've been living a lie.
697
00:24:50,633 --> 00:24:52,886
You and I are going to change
this world together.
698
00:24:52,928 --> 00:24:54,096
(Marky whoops, Lindsay laughs)
699
00:24:54,138 --> 00:24:56,390
LINDSAY:
You know, my shaman
700
00:24:56,432 --> 00:24:58,641
told me that I should stop
caring about appearances.
701
00:24:58,683 --> 00:25:02,229
You know, my whole life, that's
all anyone has ever praised.
702
00:25:02,271 --> 00:25:04,647
All my mom ever cared about.
703
00:25:04,689 --> 00:25:06,775
Because I'm really pretty.
704
00:25:06,817 --> 00:25:10,028
I just thought I'd tell you that
so the story made sense.
705
00:25:10,070 --> 00:25:12,864
- I don't care.
- But I guess it's kind of karma
706
00:25:12,906 --> 00:25:15,534
that I ended up with someone
who wanted to make love to me
707
00:25:15,576 --> 00:25:16,952
no matter what I look like.
708
00:25:16,994 --> 00:25:19,121
Also wanted to make sure
you weren't a dude.
709
00:25:19,163 --> 00:25:22,291
I can tell with voices usually,
but some guys, they'll...
710
00:25:22,333 --> 00:25:25,294
they'll fool you
if that's what they want to do.
711
00:25:25,336 --> 00:25:27,463
Hey...
712
00:25:28,880 --> 00:25:31,550
Are you smiling at me?
713
00:25:31,592 --> 00:25:33,302
NARRATOR:Lindsay decided
it was only fair
714
00:25:33,344 --> 00:25:35,262
to let her husband know
715
00:25:35,304 --> 00:25:37,515
their new start
had reached a new end.
716
00:25:37,556 --> 00:25:38,932
LINDSAY:
I left.
717
00:25:38,974 --> 00:25:40,142
I guess you noticed.
718
00:25:40,184 --> 00:25:41,852
Um, look, I'm sorry.
719
00:25:41,893 --> 00:25:45,564
I-I really do care about you,
Tobias, but we were trying
720
00:25:45,606 --> 00:25:48,442
to save something
that just couldn't be saved.
721
00:25:48,484 --> 00:25:51,612
And I have to follow
my shaman's advice. I...
722
00:25:51,654 --> 00:25:56,116
I have to be true
to myself for once.
723
00:25:56,158 --> 00:25:59,911
And Marky, he sees me
for who I really am.
724
00:25:59,953 --> 00:26:02,039
- He respects me and...
- Come on, lady!
725
00:26:02,080 --> 00:26:03,415
You want to wrap this up?
726
00:26:03,457 --> 00:26:05,167
My lady needs to call
her loser ex.
727
00:26:05,209 --> 00:26:07,336
Marky, it's me.
728
00:26:07,378 --> 00:26:08,920
It's Lindsay.
729
00:26:09,880 --> 00:26:11,048
Oh.
730
00:26:11,089 --> 00:26:12,466
I thought you
were taking a dump.
731
00:26:12,508 --> 00:26:13,551
Oh, I must have
scared the (bleep)
732
00:26:13,592 --> 00:26:15,135
off that lady in the bathroom
733
00:26:15,177 --> 00:26:18,430
when I threw the door open
and told her I loved her.
734
00:26:18,472 --> 00:26:20,558
(sighs, chuckles)
735
00:26:20,599 --> 00:26:22,184
He loves me?
736
00:26:22,226 --> 00:26:23,768
MARKY:
Sorry. False alarm.
737
00:26:23,810 --> 00:26:25,270
- I don't love you.
- LINDSAY: Uh, I got to go.
738
00:26:25,312 --> 00:26:27,064
Can you delete this
so I can leave
739
00:26:27,105 --> 00:26:28,607
- a message for Maeby?
- MARKY: It's good. She's fine.
740
00:26:28,649 --> 00:26:30,609
NARRATOR:
And soon, the lovers arrived
741
00:26:30,651 --> 00:26:33,571
and discovered the joys
of their new desert home,
742
00:26:33,612 --> 00:26:36,699
dancing and making love
all night.
743
00:26:36,739 --> 00:26:39,826
Now, that time...
744
00:26:39,868 --> 00:26:41,704
was also very quick.
745
00:26:41,744 --> 00:26:45,290
And now we've freed the night up
to dance again.
746
00:26:45,332 --> 00:26:46,542
- Come on.
- Oh. Okay.
747
00:26:46,584 --> 00:26:48,043
NARRATOR:
And the next day,
748
00:26:48,085 --> 00:26:49,920
Lindsay awoke
to discover the destiny
749
00:26:49,961 --> 00:26:53,924
foretold to her in India
in drab colors before her.
750
00:26:53,965 --> 00:26:55,884
WOMAN:
Get away from her.
751
00:26:55,926 --> 00:26:57,010
Don't mess with her!
752
00:26:57,052 --> 00:26:58,220
She's none of your business.
753
00:26:58,262 --> 00:26:59,930
(sighs) Thank you.
754
00:26:59,971 --> 00:27:02,015
I said get away from her,
you slut!
755
00:27:02,057 --> 00:27:02,974
You're scaring the bird.
756
00:27:03,016 --> 00:27:04,518
MARKY:
No, no, Mom.
757
00:27:04,560 --> 00:27:06,228
Mom, she's with us.
758
00:27:06,270 --> 00:27:08,313
She lives with us now.
759
00:27:08,355 --> 00:27:11,650
And, Mom,
she tells me she's pretty.
760
00:27:11,692 --> 00:27:14,737
I have the worst (bleep) shaman.
761
00:27:22,202 --> 00:27:26,164
The defense calls to the
oyster bar thing where they sit
762
00:27:26,206 --> 00:27:27,916
the adopted daughter,
Lindsay Bluth.
763
00:27:27,958 --> 00:27:30,461
NARRATOR:
Another chair is empty
764
00:27:30,502 --> 00:27:32,003
- at Lucille's trial.
- BARRY: Lindsay...
765
00:27:32,045 --> 00:27:33,880
Mr. Zuckerkorn,
766
00:27:33,922 --> 00:27:37,008
Shrimp-Shooter Nights
starts in 15 minutes.
767
00:27:37,050 --> 00:27:38,260
Is your witness going to appear?
768
00:27:38,302 --> 00:27:40,304
BARRY (gasps):
"Appear."
769
00:27:40,345 --> 00:27:43,390
Oh, I thought the one
on the pier was a Bubba Gump's.
770
00:27:45,016 --> 00:27:47,352
NARRATOR:And, in an effort
to be less glamorous,
771
00:27:47,394 --> 00:27:50,397
Lindsay cuts her hair
only to discover,
772
00:27:50,439 --> 00:27:53,108
- much to her frustration...
- Great. Even cuter.
773
00:27:53,150 --> 00:27:55,193
And Tobias becomes addicted
774
00:27:55,235 --> 00:27:58,071
- to his new profession.
- I'm an addict, and I'm starving.
775
00:27:58,113 --> 00:28:00,407
Yes, you are starving,
so would you like some butter?
776
00:28:00,449 --> 00:28:01,784
I could give you some butter,
777
00:28:01,866 --> 00:28:04,703
and, uh, you can pay for it
w-with a shoe.
778
00:28:04,745 --> 00:28:06,455
Um... I'm sorry, but, uh,
779
00:28:06,497 --> 00:28:08,999
his guy's not giving my guy
anything, uh, to react to.
780
00:28:09,040 --> 00:28:11,543
Uh, could I get some more
of that, uh, acting juice?
781
00:28:11,955 --> 00:28:14,632
Sync & corrections by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com