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GRACE FRASER: I had this idea
of the perfect life.

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♪ (OMINOUS MUSIC PLAYING) ♪

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It is surprising
how weak we all are...

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-♪ (MUSIC STOPS) ♪
-FRANKLIN RENNER: ...when we are
convinced we are not.

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(HELICOPTER WHIRRING)

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JOE MENDOZA: I gotta feeling
your daughter is hiding
something.

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-(SIRENS WAILING)
-(TRAIN CLATTERING)

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Why were you there that night?

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-(SIRENS CONTINUE)
-(CAMERA FLASHES)

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(THUNDER CRASHES)

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-How weak do you think I am?
- (CHESS PIECES CLATTER)

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♪ (OMINOUS MUSIC PLAYING) ♪

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♪ (MUSIC FADES) ♪

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♪ ♪

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>> START THE CLOCK.

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♪ ♪

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♪ ♪

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♪ ♪

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♪ ♪

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>> Bill: THANK YOU VERY MUCH,

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THANK YOU FOR COMING.

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[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

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I APPRECIATE THAT, DOING ALL THE

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PROTOCOLS.

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I HOPE YOU'RE EXCITED, IT'S 11

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DAYS UNTIL THE ELECTION.

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11 DAYS, I THINK THE COUNTRY IS

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FOCUSED ON ONE THING.

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JEFFREY TOOBIN JERKED OFF ON

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ZOOM?

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DID YOU SEE THAT?

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HE'S A BIG CNN ANALYSTS, HE'S A

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BIG LEGAL GUY AND APPARENTLY HE

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WAS WHACKING DURING A ZOOM

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MEETING IN FRONT OF HIS

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COLLEAGUES.

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YOUR GROSSED OUT, HE'S BEEN A

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GUEST ON THE SHOW, I HAD TO

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SHAKE HIS HAND.

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[LAUGHTER]

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SO MANY GROSS THINGS THIS WEEK,

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DID YOU SEE THIS?

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TRUMP -- UNBELIEVABLE, HAS A

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SECRET CHINESE BANK ACCOUNT AND

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HE'S PAID $200,000 IN TAXES

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THERE, I WAS ABSOLUTELY SHOCKED.

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TRUMP PAID TAXES?

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[LAUGHTER]

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[APPLAUSE]

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HE'S ALWAYS SAID "I PAID TAXES."

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IT JUST WASN'T IN THIS COUNTRY.

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DID YOU WATCH THE DEBATE LAST

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NIGHT?

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OH, YOU DID.

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[APPLAUSE]

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WAS IT JUST ME, MY TV, IT LOOKS

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LIKE THE COLOR OF TRUMP'S HEAD

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WAS EVEN FOR HIM -- HE LOOKED

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LIKE ROAST BEEF.

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IT LOOKED LIKE BIDEN WAS

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DEBATING ARBY'S, IT WAS

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DISCONCERTING.

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WE DID -- LAST NIGHT, WE

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DISCOVERED THE MONSTER'S

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WEAKNESS THE MUTE BUTTON.

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JUST THE THREAT OF IT KEPT TRUMP

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IN CHECK, IT WAS LIKE FIRE TO

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FRANKENSTEIN OR GARLIC TO RUDY

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GIULIANI.

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[LAUGHTER]

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[APPLAUSE]

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RUDY GIULIANI, THERE'S A NEW

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BORAT MOVIE, I THINK IT STARTS

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TOMORROW -- AND RUDY GIULIANI'S

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IN IT BECAUSE AN ACTRESS, PART

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OF THE BORAT TROUPE, SHE'S

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POSING AS A CONSERVATIVE

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REPORTER, LURING RUDY UP TO HIS

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HOTEL ROOM WHICH SHE DOES AND

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HE'S LYING THERE ON THE BED

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WHILE SHE FLIRTS WITH HIM AND

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HE'S GOT HIS HAND REACHING INTO

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HIS TROUSERS.

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HE SAYS IT'S NOT WHAT IT LOOKS

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LIKE -- NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE,

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IT LOOKS LIKE AN ALIEN AUTOPSY

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IS WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE.

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[LAUGHTER]

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[APPLAUSE]

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IT COMES ON THE HEELS OF LAST

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WEEK, HE WAS IN THE NEWS DIGGING

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UP DIRT ON HUNTER BIDEN AFTER OF

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COURSE THE WHOLE UKRAINE THING

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WHERE HE WAS DIGGING UP DIRT ON

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JOE BIDEN BECAUSE THAT'S WHO YOU

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WANT LOOKING INTO HIGH-TECH

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CORRUPTION IN THE FORMER

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SOVIET UNION, SOMEONE WHO CAN

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GET FOOLED BY BORAT.

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[LAUGHTER]

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[APPLAUSE]

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HE DENIES THE WHOLE THING COME

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HE CLAIMS HE WAS TUCKING IN HIS

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SHIRT.

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JEFFREY TOOBIN SAID "CAN I USE

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THAT?"

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WHAT A PIECE OF WORK, HE CLAIMS

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HE WORKS FOR TRUMP FOR FREE, HE

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NEVER TAKES ANY MONEY, HIS ONLY

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COMPENSATION IS A GET TO EAT THE

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FLIES THAT LAND ON MIKE PENCE.

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[LAUGHTER]

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[APPLAUSE]

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LISTEN TO THIS, THE POPE --

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EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE HE COMES

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THROUGH, HE CAME OUT IN FAVOR OF

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CIVIL UNIONS FOR GAY COUPLES.

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[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

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ALL I HAVE TO SAY IS "WHO'S THE

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LUCKY CARDINAL?"

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OKAY, WE'VE GOT A GREAT SHOW

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HEIDI HEITKAMP AND ANTHONY

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SCARAMUCCI ARE HERE, AND A

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LITTLE LATER WE'LL BE SPEAKING

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WITH: MATTHEW McCONAUGHEY.

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HE'S THE AUTHOR OF "OMG WTF DOES

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THE CONSTITUTION ACTUALLY SAY?:

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A NON-BORING GUIDE TO HOW OUR

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DEMOCRACY IS SUPPOSED TO WORK":

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BEN SHEEHAN.

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[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

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DON'T YOU GET NEAR ME.

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>> I WON'T, I PROMISE.

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>> Bill: I'M JUST KIDDING.

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SO GLAD YOU'RE HERE AND I REALLY

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MISPRONOUNCE THAT, I WENT OMG

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AND I WENT RIGHT TO WHAT THE

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FUCK BUT THOSE LETTERS DON'T

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EVEN CORRESPOND TO WHAT WE THINK

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THEY ARE, OH, MY GOD, WHAT THE

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FUCK, IT'S ALSO OHIO, MICHIGAN,

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GEORGIA.

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>> WISCONSIN, TEXAS, FLORIDA.

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>> Bill: THOSE OF THE KEY

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STATES.

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WE HAVE A LOT IN COMMON THEME

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WISE, WE'VE BOTH BEEN ON AND ON

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FOR A LONG TIME ABOUT THIS

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PROBLEM WE HAVE IN AMERICA THAT

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YOU ARE SUCH A PERFECT GUEST TO

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WALK US THROUGH, WE ARE ON THE

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HONOR SYSTEM AND SO MUCH WE

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DEPEND ON HAS NOT ACTUALLY BEEN

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WRITTEN DOWN IN LAW FOR THE

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CONSTITUTION AND NOW WE HAVE

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SOMEONE WHO HAS NO HONOR, PUTS

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HIS FAMILY IN OFFICE, GETS HELP

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FROM FOREIGN COUNTRIES, RUNS A

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BUSINESS EMPIRE WHILE HE'S

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PRESIDENT, THINGS WE DIDN'T

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THINK WE HAD TO WRITE DOWN.

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MY WORRY NOW IS THE ELECTORAL

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COLLEGE, IT'S NOT ACTUALLY

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WRITTEN DOWN THAT THE ELECT

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DOORS THAT REALLY ELECT THE

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PRESIDENT GO TO THE GUY WHO GETS

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THE MOST VOTES IN THE STATE.

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>> YOU ONLY HAVE 17 STATES THAT

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DON'T BIND THEIR ELECT DOORS

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INCLUDING STATES LIKE

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PENNSYLVANIA, GEORGIA, TEXAS.

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THAT MAKE THEM FOLLOW THE

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POPULAR VOTE IN THE STATE,

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THAT'S ONE THING THAT'S NOT

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WRITTEN DOWN AND THAT'S WHAT THE

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SUPREME COURT DECISION EARLIER

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THIS YEAR SAID IT'S

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CONSTITUTIONAL TO HAVE FAITHLESS

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ELECTOR LAWS AND FOR STATES TO

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DECIDE NOT TO HAVE THAT.

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SO MUCH OF THE ELECTORAL COLLEGE

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IS SET IN THE CONSTITUTION BUT A

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LOT OF THE ACTUAL PROCESS THAT'S

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GOING TO HAPPEN OVER THE NEXT

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TWO MONTHS IS SET BY FEDERAL LAW

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AND EVEN LAW THAT DESCRIBES THAT

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PEOPLE CAN BARELY UNDERSTAND.

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THIS SECTION 15 WRITTEN IN 1887

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IS CONSTANTLY DEBATED, IT'S

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ALMOST UNINTELLIGIBLE TO MY

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WORRY IS IF WE GET TO THIS POINT

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WHERE WE HAVE THE ELECTORAL

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COUNT THAT HAPPENS ON

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JANUARY 6TH, THERE'S GOING TO BE

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DISPUTES AND IT COULD GO

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HAYWIRE.

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>> Bill: WHAT IS THE

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LIKELIHOOD THAT SOME STATE, AT

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LEAST ONE STATE DOES NOT SEND TO

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THE ELECTORAL COLLEGE TO

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ACTUALLY ELECT THE PRESIDENT,

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DOES NOT SEND ELECT DOORS THAT

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REPRESENT TO WON THAT STATE, DO

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YOU THINK THERE'S A HIGH

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POSSIBILITY?

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SPEAK I DON'T THINK IT'S A HIGH

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PROBABILITY BUT I THOUGHT A LOT

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OF THINGS OVER THE LAST FOUR

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YEARS AND DIDN'T HAVE A HIGH

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PROBABILITY.

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>> Bill: THE ONE THING WE KNOW

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FOR SURE IS HOWEVER MUCH TRUMP

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LOSES BY -- LAST TIME I DID NOT

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PREDICT HE WOULD WIN, HE WOULD

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LOSE, THIS TIME I'M SAYING HE

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WILL LOSE, BUT THAT'S JUST THE

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POPULAR VOTE AND PROBABLY THE

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ELECTORAL COLLEGE.

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WHAT I KNOW WILL NOT HAPPEN IS

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THE NEXT DAY DONALD TRUMP SAYING

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"I CONGRATULATE JOE BIDEN AND

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I'VE INSTRUCTED MY STAFF TO MAKE

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A SMOOTH TRANSITION, THE BEST

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MAN WON AND THIS IS OUR SYSTEM."

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THAT WILL NEVER HAPPEN.

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[APPLAUSE]

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HE WILL LOSE BIG AND THEN GO APE

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SHIT ABOUT THAT, WHAT WILL APE

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SHIT ENTAIL?

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>> MY WORRY IS MORE PEOPLE

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AROUND HIM OUT OF THE SYSTEM,

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WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN IS YOU

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HAVE THE ELECTION ON

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NOVEMBER 3RD BUT THEN YOU HAVE

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UNTIL DECEMBER 8TH IF THERE'S A

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CONTROVERSY IN A STATE OR IF

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THERE IS A RECOUNT OR CLAIMS OF

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VOTER FRAUD OR WHATEVER IT IS,

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THERE IS THIS OPPORTUNITY FOR

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STATES TO CHOOSE, TO DECIDE A

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DIFFERENT WAY TO APPOINT THE

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ELECT DOORS AND AS LONG AS THEY

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ACT ON IT, THEY COULD MAKE IT GO

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DIFFERENTLY FROM THE POPULAR

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VOTE.

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WE HAVE TO PAY ATTENTION TO THE

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STATE LEGISLATURES TO MAKE SURE

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THEY FOLLOW THE POPULAR VOTE AND

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THEY DON'T HAVE A POPULAR VOTE

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THAT'S DIFFERENT.

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>> Bill: MAKE A PREDICTION FOR

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ME COME I DON'T THINK THE

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ELECTION WILL BE DECIDED

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NOVEMBER 3RD.

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>> I DON'T EITHER.

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>> Bill: PREDICT A DATE THAT

257
00:09:16,300 --> 00:09:16,867
YOU THINK SOMEBODY WILL MAKE A

258
00:09:16,934 --> 00:09:18,000
CALL.

259
00:09:18,066 --> 00:09:21,934
>> I'LL SAY AFTER THE SAFE

260
00:09:22,000 --> 00:09:25,767
HARBOR DATE, I'LL SAY DECEMBER

261
00:09:25,834 --> 00:09:27,433
DECEMBER 9TH.

262
00:09:27,500 --> 00:09:28,667
>> Bill: BETWEEN NOVEMBER 3RD

263
00:09:28,734 --> 00:09:30,700
AND DECEMBER 9TH, THEY ARE

264
00:09:30,767 --> 00:09:32,100
RECOUNTING --

265
00:09:32,166 --> 00:09:33,266
>> THEY COULD TO.

266
00:09:33,333 --> 00:09:35,633
>> Bill: IS IT GOING TO

267
00:09:35,700 --> 00:09:35,967
COURT'S?

268
00:09:36,033 --> 00:09:37,734
>> I THINK IN A STATE LIKE TEXAS

269
00:09:37,800 --> 00:09:40,000
OR A STATE LIKE GEORGIA, BECAUSE

270
00:09:40,066 --> 00:09:42,867
THEY DON'T BIND THEIR ELECT

271
00:09:42,934 --> 00:09:49,767
DOORS, ELECTORS, THERE IS A

272
00:09:49,834 --> 00:09:52,800
CHANCE I COULD GO HAYWIRE.

273
00:09:52,867 --> 00:09:54,467
WE WILL KNOW BY DECEMBER 9TH AND

274
00:09:54,533 --> 00:09:56,567
THE ACTUAL VOTE IS ON THE 14TH

275
00:09:56,633 --> 00:09:57,767
AND THE ACTUAL COUNTING OF

276
00:09:57,834 --> 00:09:59,133
ELECTORAL VOTES IS ON

277
00:09:59,200 --> 00:09:59,734
JANUARY 6TH AND MIKE PENCE IS

278
00:09:59,800 --> 00:10:02,567
OVERSEEING THAT.

279
00:10:02,633 --> 00:10:04,667
>> Bill: HE CAN'T DO ANYTHING

280
00:10:04,734 --> 00:10:05,100
ABOUT IT.

281
00:10:05,166 --> 00:10:08,033
>> THE LAW IS A SUPER UNCLEAR

282
00:10:08,100 --> 00:10:08,467
FROM 1887.

283
00:10:08,533 --> 00:10:10,066
IF IT GOT REALLY CLOSE AND IT'S

284
00:10:10,133 --> 00:10:12,233
NOT A BITE AND BLOW OUT, YOU

285
00:10:12,300 --> 00:10:13,400
COULD HAVE SOME COMPLICATIONS

286
00:10:13,467 --> 00:10:14,066
THAT WILL HAPPEN.

287
00:10:14,133 --> 00:10:15,533
I DON'T THINK IT'S GOING TO

288
00:10:15,600 --> 00:10:16,200
HAPPEN BUT I THINK IT'S

289
00:10:16,266 --> 00:10:17,767
IMPORTANT TO KNOW WHERE THE

290
00:10:17,834 --> 00:10:20,066
GUARDRAILS ARE.

291
00:10:20,133 --> 00:10:21,934
>> Bill: SAY THINGS GO BIDEN'S

292
00:10:22,000 --> 00:10:23,433
WAY DECEMBER 9TH AND DECLARES HE

293
00:10:23,500 --> 00:10:26,066
IS THE WINNER BUT TRUMP IS NOT

294
00:10:26,133 --> 00:10:27,367
GOING TO ACCEPT THAT.

295
00:10:27,433 --> 00:10:27,834
>> NO.

296
00:10:27,900 --> 00:10:29,834
>> Bill: WHAT HAPPENS BETWEEN

297
00:10:29,900 --> 00:10:31,033
DECEMBER 9TH AND JANUARY 20TH

298
00:10:31,100 --> 00:10:31,900
WHEN HE SUPPOSED TO LEAVE.

299
00:10:31,967 --> 00:10:34,300
I'VE HEARD JOE BIDEN SAY THE

300
00:10:34,367 --> 00:10:35,567
UNITED STATES GOVERNMENT IS

301
00:10:35,633 --> 00:10:36,567
PERFECTLY EQUIPPED TO ESCORT A

302
00:10:36,633 --> 00:10:38,667
TRESPASSER OUT OF THE

303
00:10:38,734 --> 00:10:39,967
WHITE HOUSE.

304
00:10:40,033 --> 00:10:41,600
AT THAT MOMENT, HE IS THE

305
00:10:41,700 --> 00:10:41,934
GOVERNMENT.

306
00:10:42,000 --> 00:10:47,066
HE STILL THE GOVERNMENT AND UNTE

307
00:10:47,133 --> 00:10:47,433
SAYS DIFFERENT.

308
00:10:47,500 --> 00:10:49,633
>> WE NEVER HAD A SITUATION --

309
00:10:49,700 --> 00:10:51,467
WE'VE GOTTEN CLOSE -- WE HAD A

310
00:10:51,533 --> 00:10:54,467
SITUATION IN 1 1876 WERE GOT TWO

311
00:10:54,533 --> 00:10:55,834
DAYS BEFORE INAUGURATION AND

312
00:10:55,900 --> 00:10:56,834
THEY WERE PLANNING PARALLEL

313
00:10:56,900 --> 00:10:58,467
INAUGURATIONS, THEY FINALLY

314
00:10:58,533 --> 00:11:00,467
ENDED UP HAVING THE WINNER

315
00:11:00,533 --> 00:11:02,667
RUTHERFORD B. HAYES WIN BY ONE

316
00:11:02,734 --> 00:11:04,633
ELECTORAL VOTE BUT WE'VE NEVER

317
00:11:04,700 --> 00:11:05,400
HAD A SITUATION WHERE IT'S

318
00:11:05,467 --> 00:11:06,000
GOTTEN TO INAUGURATION DAY AND

319
00:11:06,066 --> 00:11:08,300
THE PERSON REFUSED TO LEAVE.

320
00:11:08,367 --> 00:11:10,533
>> Bill: HOW DO WE FIX THIS IN

321
00:11:10,600 --> 00:11:10,834
THE FUTURE?

322
00:11:10,900 --> 00:11:14,033
A CONSTITUTIONAL AMENDMENT TAKES

323
00:11:14,100 --> 00:11:16,633
TWO-THIRDS --

324
00:11:16,700 --> 00:11:17,567
>> TWO-THIRDS OF THE HOUSE IN

325
00:11:17,633 --> 00:11:21,433
THE SENATE TO PROPOSE IT.

326
00:11:21,500 --> 00:11:22,600
SUPER MAJORITIES IN BOTH.

327
00:11:22,667 --> 00:11:24,367
>> Bill: THAT'S A LOT, 67%

328
00:11:24,433 --> 00:11:27,667
THAT NEVER HAPPENS FOR ANYTHING,

329
00:11:27,734 --> 00:11:29,467
PLUS THREE FOURTHS OF THE

330
00:11:29,533 --> 00:11:29,700
STATES.

331
00:11:29,767 --> 00:11:31,700
>> YOU NEED 38 STATES.

332
00:11:31,767 --> 00:11:33,200
>> Bill: IT SOUNDS TO ME LIKE

333
00:11:33,266 --> 00:11:34,367
WE COULD NEVER REALLY HAVE A

334
00:11:34,433 --> 00:11:36,900
CONSTITUTIONAL AMENDMENT AGAIN,

335
00:11:36,967 --> 00:11:37,667
THAT IS NOT REALLY GOING TO

336
00:11:37,734 --> 00:11:37,900
HAPPEN.

337
00:11:37,967 --> 00:11:40,834
>> THERE ARE TWO WAYS TO WORK

338
00:11:40,900 --> 00:11:42,700
AROUND THIS WITH THE ELECTORAL

339
00:11:42,767 --> 00:11:42,934
COLLEGE.

340
00:11:43,000 --> 00:11:44,433
ONE IS CALLED THE NATIONAL

341
00:11:44,500 --> 00:11:45,133
POPULAR VOTE INTERSTATE COMPACT

342
00:11:45,200 --> 00:11:46,367
AND RIGHT NOW YOU HAVE 15 STATES

343
00:11:46,433 --> 00:11:48,066
WHO HAVE SIGNED ON FOR A TOTAL

344
00:11:48,133 --> 00:11:54,500
OF 196 ELECTORS.

345
00:11:54,567 --> 00:11:55,567
THAT'S NOT ENOUGH TO TIP THE

346
00:11:55,633 --> 00:11:56,433
BALANCE FOR THE SELECTION BUT

347
00:11:56,500 --> 00:11:58,900
YOU COULD IN THE FUTURE.

348
00:11:58,967 --> 00:12:00,633
THE OTHER IS YOU COULD HAVE

349
00:12:00,700 --> 00:12:02,000
STATES NOT GIVE WINNER-TAKE-ALL

350
00:12:02,066 --> 00:12:03,900
ELECTORAL VOTES, YOU HAVE STATES

351
00:12:03,967 --> 00:12:04,533
GUARANTEED TO GO BLUE AND PEOPLE

352
00:12:04,600 --> 00:12:07,900
WHO ARE VOTING -- PEOPLE WHO ARE

353
00:12:07,967 --> 00:12:09,100
VOTING REPUBLICAN IN CALIFORNIA,

354
00:12:09,166 --> 00:12:10,100
THERE VOTE FOR PRESIDENT ISN'T

355
00:12:10,166 --> 00:12:10,967
REALLY GOING TO MATTER.

356
00:12:11,033 --> 00:12:12,734
SO YOU COULD SWITCH IT SO EVERY

357
00:12:12,800 --> 00:12:15,667
STATE HAS THE ABILITY TOMORROW

358
00:12:15,734 --> 00:12:16,333
TO CHANGE THEIR LAWS SO IT'S

359
00:12:16,400 --> 00:12:18,066
PROPORTIONAL RATHER THAN

360
00:12:18,133 --> 00:12:18,467
WINNER-TAKE-ALL.

361
00:12:18,533 --> 00:12:20,600
>> Bill: I'LL BE PRAYING WITH

362
00:12:20,667 --> 00:12:23,633
YOU -- JUST KIDDING.

363
00:12:23,700 --> 00:12:25,834
THANKS VERY MUCH, LET'S MEET OUR

364
00:12:25,900 --> 00:12:32,734
PANEL.

365
00:12:32,800 --> 00:12:35,300
HOW ARE YOU DOING?

366
00:12:35,367 --> 00:12:36,133
ALL RIGHT, GOOD TO SEE EVERYBODY

367
00:12:36,200 --> 00:12:38,266
COME A DISTANCED.

368
00:12:38,333 --> 00:12:38,834
HE'S THE FORMER WHITE HOUSE

369
00:12:38,900 --> 00:12:39,633
COMMUNICATIONS DIRECTOR UNDER

370
00:12:39,700 --> 00:12:40,867
PRESIDENT TRUMP AND HOST OF THE

371
00:12:40,934 --> 00:12:41,667
PODCAST "SALT TALKS" ON

372
00:12:41,734 --> 00:12:47,033
SALT.ORG: ANTHONY SCARAMUCCI.

373
00:12:47,100 --> 00:12:49,000
[APPLAUSE]

374
00:12:49,066 --> 00:12:50,934
NOW HE GETS A BIG ROUND OF

375
00:12:51,000 --> 00:12:51,233
APPLAUSE.

376
00:12:51,300 --> 00:12:52,500
SHE'S THE FORMER DEMOCRATIC

377
00:12:52,533 --> 00:12:57,133
SENATOR FROM NORTH DAKOTA AND

378
00:12:57,200 --> 00:12:57,633
PRETTY GOOD.

379
00:12:57,700 --> 00:12:58,266
CO-FOUNDER OF THE ORGANIZATION,

380
00:12:58,333 --> 00:12:59,066
"ONE COUNTRY PROJECT": HEIDI

381
00:12:59,133 --> 00:13:02,633
HEITKAMP.

382
00:13:02,700 --> 00:13:09,400
GREAT TO SEE YOU.

383
00:13:09,467 --> 00:13:09,867
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

384
00:13:09,934 --> 00:13:13,266
SO MUCH GOING ON, SO MANY OF THE

385
00:13:13,333 --> 00:13:16,367
WEEK OF STORIES A AND I MET THE

386
00:13:16,433 --> 00:13:17,400
END OF MY ROPE, I'M GOING TO

387
00:13:17,467 --> 00:13:19,266
TALK ABOUT WHAT I DON'T WANT TO

388
00:13:19,333 --> 00:13:20,834
TALK ABOUT, NOT THAT I DON'T DO

389
00:13:20,900 --> 00:13:22,934
THAT ANY WEEK ANYWAY.

390
00:13:23,000 --> 00:13:24,266
I WAS WATCHING 60 MINUTES SUNDAY

391
00:13:24,333 --> 00:13:25,367
AND THEY HAD THIS STORY ON THE

392
00:13:25,433 --> 00:13:32,967
FLIGHT FROM HELL -- THE QUESTION

393
00:13:33,033 --> 00:13:35,500
I WANT TO GET TO IS WHY CAN'T

394
00:13:35,567 --> 00:13:37,400
AMERICA AND ITS SHIT TOGETHER

395
00:13:37,467 --> 00:13:38,133
ANYMORE?

396
00:13:38,200 --> 00:13:39,367
HERE'S WHAT HAPPENED.

397
00:13:39,433 --> 00:13:41,734
IN MARCH, 200 AMERICANS RIGHT

398
00:13:41,800 --> 00:13:42,767
WHEN THE PANDEMIC WAS STARTING

399
00:13:42,834 --> 00:13:44,166
AND WE'VE BEEN TALKING ABOUT IT

400
00:13:44,233 --> 00:13:46,000
FOR MONTHS -- 200 AMERICANS GET

401
00:13:46,066 --> 00:13:47,033
ON A CRUISE SHIP.

402
00:13:47,100 --> 00:13:49,333
SO RIGHT AWAY I MET AMERICANS

403
00:13:49,400 --> 00:13:50,000
ARE MORONS.

404
00:13:50,066 --> 00:13:55,967
SO THEY GET ON THE COAST

405
00:13:56,033 --> 00:14:00,633
ILLUMINE -- THE STATE DEPARTMENT

406
00:14:00,700 --> 00:14:04,266
HAS TO GET THEM OFF THE SHIP, IT

407
00:14:04,333 --> 00:14:05,433
SENDS A CHARTERED PLANE TO GET

408
00:14:05,500 --> 00:14:06,266
THEM BACK TO ATLANTA BECAUSE

409
00:14:06,333 --> 00:14:09,300
THAT'S WHERE THE CDC IS.

410
00:14:09,367 --> 00:14:10,834
IT'S OF COURSE THE FLIGHT FROM,

411
00:14:10,900 --> 00:14:12,333
PEOPLE ARE PASSING OUT IN THE

412
00:14:12,400 --> 00:14:14,667
AISLES, EVERYONE ON THE PLANE --

413
00:14:14,734 --> 00:14:18,166
IT LANDS AND THEY RADIO THE

414
00:14:18,233 --> 00:14:18,867
TOWER AND THEY SAY NOBODY TOLD

415
00:14:18,934 --> 00:14:23,266
US YOU WERE COMING.

416
00:14:23,333 --> 00:14:24,834
AND IT SITS ON THE TARMAC FOR

417
00:14:24,900 --> 00:14:26,967
THREE HOURS, THEN THEY LET THEM

418
00:14:27,033 --> 00:14:28,900
IN, CHECK THEM A LITTLE BIT,

419
00:14:28,967 --> 00:14:31,567
DISPERSE THEM OUT TO THE BUSIEST

420
00:14:31,633 --> 00:14:34,200
AIRPORT IN THE WORLD.

421
00:14:34,266 --> 00:14:35,767
HIT THE FOOD COURT, GET YOUR

422
00:14:35,834 --> 00:14:36,867
CONNECTING FLIGHTS THAT SHE

423
00:14:36,934 --> 00:14:38,400
COULDN'T DESIGN A SYSTEM BETTER

424
00:14:38,467 --> 00:14:41,066
TO SUPER SPREAD THIS DISEASE

425
00:14:41,133 --> 00:14:43,166
INTO AMERICA, WHY ARE WE SUCH A

426
00:14:43,233 --> 00:14:44,066
LOSER COUNTRY NOW?

427
00:14:44,133 --> 00:14:45,734
WHAT IS IT WITH THE PEOPLE OF

428
00:14:45,800 --> 00:14:48,166
THIS COUNTRY, ARE THEY STONED?

429
00:14:48,233 --> 00:14:49,367
ARE THEY STUPID?

430
00:14:49,433 --> 00:14:51,900
ARE THEY DISILLUSIONED, IS IT

431
00:14:51,967 --> 00:14:53,400
ALL THREE?

432
00:14:53,467 --> 00:14:53,967
YOU COULDN'T COMMUNICATE THE

433
00:14:54,033 --> 00:14:55,834
PLANE WAS COMING IN, YOU LET

434
00:14:55,900 --> 00:14:59,667
THEM ALL OUT?

435
00:14:59,734 --> 00:15:04,166
>> I REQUESTED VODKA.

436
00:15:04,233 --> 00:15:05,867
>> Bill: YOU'RE A WALL STREET

437
00:15:05,900 --> 00:15:07,600
SUPERSTAR, WHAT DO YOU THINK?

438
00:15:07,667 --> 00:15:09,667
>> THERE IS FRAGMENTATION OF

439
00:15:09,734 --> 00:15:11,633
INFORMATION, YOU'VE GOT PEOPLE

440
00:15:11,700 --> 00:15:12,667
POLITICIZING MASKS, THE

441
00:15:12,734 --> 00:15:13,834
PRESIDENT HAS POLITICIZED IT AND

442
00:15:13,900 --> 00:15:15,000
TRIED TO MAKE IT INTO NOT THAT

443
00:15:15,066 --> 00:15:15,867
BIG OF A DEAL.

444
00:15:15,934 --> 00:15:19,266
YOU'VE GOT 42 MAKE 50% OF THE

445
00:15:19,333 --> 00:15:21,033
PEOPLE.

446
00:15:21,100 --> 00:15:21,600
>> Bill: I'M ASKING WHY THE

447
00:15:21,667 --> 00:15:24,900
PEOPLE ON THE GROUND, SOMEONE

448
00:15:24,967 --> 00:15:25,767
HAS TO TELL THEM THE PLANE IS

449
00:15:25,834 --> 00:15:27,567
COMING IN, HOW DID THAT MESSAGE

450
00:15:27,633 --> 00:15:29,734
NOT GET THROUGH?

451
00:15:29,800 --> 00:15:32,600
>> YOU CAN MAKE ALL THOSE

452
00:15:32,667 --> 00:15:33,166
POLITICAL ARGUMENTS, IT'S

453
00:15:33,233 --> 00:15:36,467
FUNDAMENTAL INCOMPETENCE.

454
00:15:36,533 --> 00:15:40,200
NOT ON THE PEOPLE ON THE GROUND,

455
00:15:40,266 --> 00:15:40,800
IT'S FUNDAMENTALLY INCOMPETENT

456
00:15:40,867 --> 00:15:41,400
OF THE STATE DEPARTMENT, WHAT

457
00:15:41,467 --> 00:15:42,800
WITH THE STATE DEPARTMENT DOING?

458
00:15:42,867 --> 00:15:44,433
EVERYONE SHOULD REMEMBER THIS

459
00:15:44,500 --> 00:15:46,734
WHEN POMPEO OFFERS HIMSELF UP TO

460
00:15:46,800 --> 00:15:47,800
AMERICA TO BE THE NEXT

461
00:15:47,867 --> 00:15:48,800
PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES.

462
00:15:48,867 --> 00:15:50,266
HE'S BEEN INCOMPETENT SINCE DAY

463
00:15:50,333 --> 00:15:51,033
ONE TRAM.

464
00:15:51,100 --> 00:15:52,467
THIS WHOLE THING HAS BEEN

465
00:15:52,533 --> 00:15:57,834
MISMANAGED SINCE DAY ONE TREND.

466
00:15:57,900 --> 00:15:59,567
>> Bill: THE PERSONAL BELIEFS

467
00:15:59,633 --> 00:16:01,133
OF THOSE PEOPLE IS TO IGNORE

468
00:16:01,200 --> 00:16:03,500
SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

469
00:16:03,567 --> 00:16:05,900
>> Bill: WHO?

470
00:16:05,967 --> 00:16:07,500
>> THE AIR TRAFFIC CONTROLLER.

471
00:16:07,567 --> 00:16:08,166
>> Bill: WHAT DO YOU MEAN

472
00:16:08,233 --> 00:16:11,033
DISBELIEVE IT?

473
00:16:11,100 --> 00:16:13,467
IT'S NOT UP TO BEING BELIEVED,

474
00:16:13,533 --> 00:16:14,867
THIS IS INFORMATION, THIS PLANE

475
00:16:14,934 --> 00:16:16,300
IS COMING IN WITH THESE SICK

476
00:16:16,367 --> 00:16:18,567
PASSENGERS, BE READY FOR IT,

477
00:16:18,633 --> 00:16:20,500
HANDLE IT LIKE THEY WOULD IN A

478
00:16:20,567 --> 00:16:22,800
NORMAL COUNTRY.

479
00:16:22,867 --> 00:16:25,133
SOMETHING IS WRONG THAT'S BEYOND

480
00:16:25,200 --> 00:16:28,400
TRUMP.

481
00:16:28,467 --> 00:16:29,467
>> SYSTEMIC IMBALANCE.

482
00:16:29,533 --> 00:16:30,800
>> Bill: I WAS IN AFRICA

483
00:16:30,867 --> 00:16:32,667
DURING EBOLA AND THEY TESTED YOU

484
00:16:32,734 --> 00:16:34,100
MORE HEAVILY IN AFRICA WHEN YOU

485
00:16:34,166 --> 00:16:35,967
CAME IN THEIR COUNTRY AND LEFT

486
00:16:36,033 --> 00:16:39,066
THEIR COUNTRY IN THE DEVELOPING

487
00:16:39,133 --> 00:16:41,133
WORLD.

488
00:16:41,200 --> 00:16:42,433
HE HAS NEVER TAKEN THIS

489
00:16:42,500 --> 00:16:44,500
SERIOUSLY AND TO STOP PEOPLE AND

490
00:16:44,567 --> 00:16:46,500
TEST PEOPLE, THAT MEANS YOU'RE

491
00:16:46,567 --> 00:16:46,834
FAILING.

492
00:16:46,900 --> 00:16:49,533
IF IT'S FOR THE PRESIDENT.

493
00:16:49,600 --> 00:16:54,266
>> Bill: HIS FUCK UPS NOT IN

494
00:16:54,333 --> 00:16:55,467
DISPUTE BUT SOMEBODY HAS TO

495
00:16:55,533 --> 00:16:56,567
ANSWER THIS QUESTION ABOUT

496
00:16:56,633 --> 00:16:58,200
AMERICA AT LARGE ALSO, IT WASN'T

497
00:16:58,266 --> 00:17:00,700
UP TO HIM JUST TO BE ON THE

498
00:17:00,767 --> 00:17:03,000
GROUND AND THE CDC, ALL THIS

499
00:17:03,066 --> 00:17:04,633
SHIT, PEOPLE ARE JUST FUCKING

500
00:17:04,700 --> 00:17:04,834
DUMB.

501
00:17:04,900 --> 00:17:09,333
>> HE'S THE BIGGEST DOMINO,

502
00:17:09,400 --> 00:17:09,967
TIPPING AND EVERYTHING ELSE.

503
00:17:10,033 --> 00:17:11,533
>> Bill: YES, BUT IT'S A

504
00:17:11,600 --> 00:17:12,967
DANGER TO BLAME EVERYTHING ON

505
00:17:13,033 --> 00:17:14,500
THAT AND NOT LOOK AT THIS.

506
00:17:14,567 --> 00:17:15,900
>> THERE'S NO QUESTION.

507
00:17:15,967 --> 00:17:18,100
>> Bill: MAYBE THIS WILL

508
00:17:18,166 --> 00:17:19,100
CONVINCE YOU, 25% OF ALL

509
00:17:19,166 --> 00:17:23,500
AMERICANS NOW BELIEVE QANON --

510
00:17:23,567 --> 00:17:24,934
IT WAS ONLY TWO YEARS AGO WHEN I

511
00:17:25,000 --> 00:17:27,100
FIRST MADE FUN OF IT AND WE WERE

512
00:17:27,166 --> 00:17:27,834
LIKE THIS IS HYSTERICAL, I WILL

513
00:17:27,900 --> 00:17:33,100
SAY I AM Q -- I AM.

514
00:17:33,166 --> 00:17:35,166
BECAUSE IT'S SUCH A FRIENDSHIP

515
00:17:35,233 --> 00:17:37,300
THING AND NOW IS NOT A FRINGE

516
00:17:37,367 --> 00:17:39,333
THING.

517
00:17:39,400 --> 00:17:40,533
25%, THERE'S GOING TO BE

518
00:17:40,600 --> 00:17:43,066
CONGRESSPEOPLE WHO ARE QANON --

519
00:17:43,133 --> 00:17:45,967
HERE'S THE QUESTION, 25% OF

520
00:17:46,033 --> 00:17:48,767
AMERICANS AGREE TO, 25% NOT

521
00:17:48,834 --> 00:17:51,166
SURE, MAY BE, DO YOU BELIEVE TOP

522
00:17:51,233 --> 00:17:54,133
DEMOCRATS ARE INVOLVED IN A

523
00:17:54,200 --> 00:18:00,900
DELETE CHILD SEX TRAFFICKING

524
00:18:00,967 --> 00:18:02,333
RINGS.

525
00:18:02,400 --> 00:18:04,166
25% OF AMERICANS, ANOTHER 24%

526
00:18:04,233 --> 00:18:05,900
NOT SURE THAT THAT MIGHT BE

527
00:18:05,967 --> 00:18:08,567
TRUE.

528
00:18:08,633 --> 00:18:10,400
BIDEN HAS TO RUN FOR OFFICE

529
00:18:10,467 --> 00:18:11,667
FACTORING IN THAT A GOOD PART OF

530
00:18:11,734 --> 00:18:13,834
THE POPULACE THINKS HE'S A

531
00:18:13,900 --> 00:18:15,900
PEDOPHILE.

532
00:18:15,967 --> 00:18:17,133
DISCUSS.

533
00:18:17,200 --> 00:18:19,800
>> THE MAIN THING ABOUT THAT IS

534
00:18:19,867 --> 00:18:20,734
THERE'S A LOT OF DISENFRANCHISED

535
00:18:20,800 --> 00:18:22,367
PEOPLE, THEY FEEL THE SYSTEM HAS

536
00:18:22,433 --> 00:18:24,700
NOT WORKED FOR THEM, THEY CAN'T

537
00:18:24,767 --> 00:18:26,500
BLAME THEMSELVES SO THEY BUY

538
00:18:26,567 --> 00:18:27,767
INTO CONSPIRACY THEORY, THEN YOU

539
00:18:27,834 --> 00:18:29,133
HAVE ANOTHER GROUP OF PEOPLE WHO

540
00:18:29,200 --> 00:18:31,233
ARE PRAYING ON THEM AND ONE OF

541
00:18:31,300 --> 00:18:33,133
THEM HAPPENS TO BE THE PRESIDENT

542
00:18:33,200 --> 00:18:34,233
OF THE UNITED STATES.

543
00:18:34,300 --> 00:18:36,567
HE IS TWEETING THINGS ABOUT

544
00:18:36,633 --> 00:18:36,867
BIN LADEN --

545
00:18:36,934 --> 00:18:38,033
>> Bill: YOU'RE SAYING PEOPLE

546
00:18:38,100 --> 00:18:40,166
THINK THE FIX IS INCOME OF THE

547
00:18:40,233 --> 00:18:41,367
SYSTEM IS RIGGED, WHY DO RICH

548
00:18:41,433 --> 00:18:45,133
PEOPLE GET RICHER, PRINCE ANDREW

549
00:18:45,200 --> 00:18:50,867
IS ON SEX ISLAND .-

550
00:18:50,934 --> 00:18:54,000
>> HE'S RE-TWEETING FALSE

551
00:18:54,066 --> 00:18:55,433
BIN LADEN RAID CONSPIRACIES,

552
00:18:55,500 --> 00:18:56,967
RETWEETING Q ANON AND IT SAYS HE

553
00:18:57,033 --> 00:18:59,200
DENIES IT AND THERE'S A GOOD 25%

554
00:18:59,266 --> 00:19:01,233
OF THE PEOPLE THAT WENT FROM

555
00:19:01,300 --> 00:19:02,367
ECONOMICALLY ASPIRATIONAL AS

556
00:19:02,433 --> 00:19:04,300
BLUE-COLLAR PEOPLE TO

557
00:19:04,367 --> 00:19:09,967
ECONOMICALLY DESPERATION AND

558
00:19:10,033 --> 00:19:11,400
THEY GET IGNITED BY IT.

559
00:19:11,467 --> 00:19:13,567
>> I DISAGREE, I THINK IF YOU

560
00:19:13,633 --> 00:19:15,300
HAD HAD THE INTERNET WHEN I WAS

561
00:19:15,367 --> 00:19:16,900
A KID INSTEAD OF REACHING FOR

562
00:19:16,967 --> 00:19:18,800
"THE ENQUIRER" AND READING ABOUT

563
00:19:18,867 --> 00:19:20,333
ALIENS OR SOME CRAZINESS, MAY BE

564
00:19:20,400 --> 00:19:22,200
ONLY 5% OF THE PEOPLE SAW THAT

565
00:19:22,266 --> 00:19:24,867
STORY, NOW 25% OF THE PEOPLE ARE

566
00:19:24,934 --> 00:19:25,433
SEEING THE STORY.

567
00:19:25,500 --> 00:19:26,934
THERE ARE SOME PEOPLE WHO JUST

568
00:19:27,000 --> 00:19:28,800
DO NOT HAVE THE ABILITY TO USE

569
00:19:28,867 --> 00:19:30,467
CRITICAL THINKING AND THAT IS

570
00:19:30,533 --> 00:19:33,967
THE BIGGER PROBLEM IN THIS

571
00:19:34,033 --> 00:19:35,600
COUNTRY.

572
00:19:35,667 --> 00:19:36,734
YOU CAN TALK ABOUT WHETHER THEY

573
00:19:36,800 --> 00:19:37,734
ARE DISENFRANCHISED, BEING POOR

574
00:19:37,800 --> 00:19:41,400
DOES IT MAKE YOU STUPID.

575
00:19:41,467 --> 00:19:44,433
IT DOESN'T GET YOU IN THAT SPOT.

576
00:19:44,500 --> 00:19:45,633
>> Bill: BEING RICH MAKES YOU

577
00:19:45,700 --> 00:19:48,066
STUPID A LOT MORE OFTEN, THAT'S

578
00:19:48,133 --> 00:19:48,467
TRUE.

579
00:19:48,533 --> 00:19:50,934
RICH PEOPLE DON'T HAVE TO THINK,

580
00:19:51,000 --> 00:19:51,467
BECAUSE THEY'RE RICH.

581
00:19:51,533 --> 00:19:53,066
>> TO ME, CRITICAL THINKING IS

582
00:19:53,133 --> 00:19:57,367
WHAT WE HAVE TO FOCUS ON.

583
00:19:57,433 --> 00:19:58,133
>> Bill: YOU'RE ANSWERING MY

584
00:19:58,200 --> 00:20:02,734
FIRST QUESTION NOW ABOUT WHY WE

585
00:20:02,800 --> 00:20:06,567
FUCKED UP SO BAD WITH THE VIRUS

586
00:20:06,633 --> 00:20:07,100
SHIP.

587
00:20:07,166 --> 00:20:08,033
WE DON'T EDUCATE ANY MORE, DON'T

588
00:20:08,100 --> 00:20:12,000
THINK ANYMORE, THIS IS THE

589
00:20:12,066 --> 00:20:14,700
ANSWER.

590
00:20:14,767 --> 00:20:16,934
>> BUT ON THE VIRUS, I WILL

591
00:20:17,000 --> 00:20:19,033
STAND UP FOR THE PEOPLE AT AIR

592
00:20:19,100 --> 00:20:21,100
TRAFFIC CONTROL, IF THEY WERE

593
00:20:21,166 --> 00:20:22,633
NOT TOLD HERE IS YOUR PROTOCOL

594
00:20:22,700 --> 00:20:24,467
WHEN THEY COME ON AND THAT WAS

595
00:20:24,533 --> 00:20:25,834
THE STATE DEPARTMENT'S

596
00:20:25,900 --> 00:20:26,800
RESPONSIBILITY, YOU SAW THOSE

597
00:20:26,867 --> 00:20:28,233
LINEUPS -- REMEMBER WHEN WE

598
00:20:28,300 --> 00:20:29,667
BROUGHT THE PLANES BACK FROM

599
00:20:29,734 --> 00:20:30,967
EUROPE AND THERE WERE PEOPLE

600
00:20:31,033 --> 00:20:32,533
JAMMED WAITING TO GET THROUGH

601
00:20:32,600 --> 00:20:36,033
CUSTOMS AND THEY WEREN'T EVEN

602
00:20:36,100 --> 00:20:36,533
TESTED THEN.

603
00:20:36,600 --> 00:20:38,867
NEVER MIND THAT EXPERIENCE, WE

604
00:20:38,934 --> 00:20:39,934
CONTINUED THAT EXPERIENCE ALL

605
00:20:40,000 --> 00:20:40,600
ALONG, THAT'S HOW WE SPREAD THE

606
00:20:40,667 --> 00:20:42,533
VIRUS IN THIS COUNTRY.

607
00:20:42,600 --> 00:20:44,967
TO SIMPLY SAY WE SHUT DOWN THE

608
00:20:45,033 --> 00:20:46,834
CHINESE -- NO YOU DIDN'T, YOU

609
00:20:46,900 --> 00:20:49,033
BROUGHT PEOPLE IN HERE WHO WERE

610
00:20:49,100 --> 00:20:50,834
CONTAMINATED AND TESTED POSITIVE

611
00:20:50,900 --> 00:20:52,567
BUT NEVER TESTED THEM.

612
00:20:52,633 --> 00:20:53,934
>> Bill: IF A QUARTER OF THE

613
00:20:54,000 --> 00:20:57,667
COUNTRY AND HALF OF TRUMP PEOPLE

614
00:20:57,734 --> 00:20:58,166
THINK THE DEMOCRATS ARE

615
00:20:58,233 --> 00:21:01,066
PEDOPHILES AND SATANISTS AND

616
00:21:01,133 --> 00:21:01,900
ALSO THEY BELIEVE IN LIZARD

617
00:21:01,967 --> 00:21:02,133
PEOPLE.

618
00:21:02,200 --> 00:21:05,934
>> DRINKING BLOOD.

619
00:21:06,000 --> 00:21:10,266
>> Bill: EATING BABIES.

620
00:21:10,333 --> 00:21:11,333
>> JOHN KENNEDY'S STILL ALIVE,

621
00:21:11,400 --> 00:21:14,333
THAT'S THE GOOD NEWS.

622
00:21:14,400 --> 00:21:17,667
>> Bill: RIGHT -- IF BIDEN

623
00:21:17,734 --> 00:21:19,667
WINS, WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO

624
00:21:19,734 --> 00:21:20,233
WITH THESE PEOPLE?

625
00:21:20,300 --> 00:21:21,133
AND IF TRUMP WINS, WHAT ARE THEY

626
00:21:21,200 --> 00:21:25,266
GOING TO DO TO US?

627
00:21:25,333 --> 00:21:26,233
BECAUSE THEY BELIEVE IN THE

628
00:21:26,300 --> 00:21:27,867
STORM WHICH IS A MOMENT WHEN

629
00:21:27,934 --> 00:21:28,867
EVERYONE REALIZES ALL THIS STUFF

630
00:21:28,934 --> 00:21:30,367
AND THEY ARREST A HUNDRED

631
00:21:30,433 --> 00:21:31,367
THOUSAND PEOPLE.

632
00:21:31,433 --> 00:21:37,066
>> I'LL DEFINITELY BE IN

633
00:21:37,133 --> 00:21:38,300
UNDISCLOSED LOCATION, I'LL ZOOM

634
00:21:38,367 --> 00:21:39,066
INTO THE SHOW.

635
00:21:39,133 --> 00:21:41,066
>> I DON'T THINK THOSE OF THE

636
00:21:41,133 --> 00:21:44,533
DANGEROUS PEOPLE, I KNOW

637
00:21:44,600 --> 00:21:44,934
STUPIDITY --

638
00:21:45,000 --> 00:21:46,433
>> Bill: THAT MANY OF THEM

639
00:21:46,500 --> 00:21:47,233
ISN'T DANGEROUS?

640
00:21:47,300 --> 00:21:48,266
>> THE DANGEROUS PEOPLE OF THE

641
00:21:48,333 --> 00:21:49,066
PEOPLE WHO STOOD IN THE STATE

642
00:21:49,133 --> 00:21:53,867
HOUSE IN MICHIGAN, THE PEOPLE

643
00:21:53,934 --> 00:21:54,300
WHO PLOTTED --

644
00:21:54,367 --> 00:21:55,700
>> Bill: YOU DON'T THINK THESE

645
00:21:55,767 --> 00:21:56,333
ARE THE SAME PEOPLE?

646
00:21:56,400 --> 00:21:58,400
YOU DON'T THINK THOSE ARE Q

647
00:21:58,467 --> 00:21:58,667
PEOPLE?

648
00:21:58,734 --> 00:22:02,166
>> I DON'T, THOSE ARE MILITIA.

649
00:22:02,233 --> 00:22:03,667
>> Bill: THERE IS NO BEEN

650
00:22:03,734 --> 00:22:06,834
DIAGRAM CROSSOVER?

651
00:22:06,900 --> 00:22:09,667
>> YOU'VE GOT TO REMEMBER THAT

652
00:22:09,734 --> 00:22:12,333
THESE GROUPS ARE NOT ALL

653
00:22:12,400 --> 00:22:13,300
MONOLITHIC.

654
00:22:13,367 --> 00:22:14,767
YOU'VE GOT TO LOOK AT WHAT THEIR

655
00:22:14,834 --> 00:22:18,033
BELIEF SYSTEM IS AND THE POOR

656
00:22:18,100 --> 00:22:20,200
BOYS ARE MISOGYNISTIC.

657
00:22:20,266 --> 00:22:22,900
PEOPLE SAY THEY ARE RACIST, NO,

658
00:22:22,967 --> 00:22:29,000
THEY DON'T LIKE WOMEN.

659
00:22:29,066 --> 00:22:29,767
>> WILLING ACCOMPLICES LIKE

660
00:22:29,834 --> 00:22:30,734
McCONNELL AND McCARTHY COME

661
00:22:30,800 --> 00:22:32,166
ON GUYS THAT KNOW BETTER,

662
00:22:32,233 --> 00:22:33,567
COTTON -- ALL THESE GUYS KNOW

663
00:22:33,633 --> 00:22:35,266
BETTER AND THEY SIT THERE AS

664
00:22:35,333 --> 00:22:36,800
WILLING ACCOMPLICES TO ALL OF

665
00:22:36,867 --> 00:22:37,467
THIS NONSENSE, FEEDING IT DAY IN

666
00:22:37,533 --> 00:22:39,467
AND DAY OUT.

667
00:22:39,533 --> 00:22:40,600
THEY ARE THE MOST DANGEROUS

668
00:22:40,667 --> 00:22:42,100
BECAUSE THEY ARE SMARTER AND

669
00:22:42,166 --> 00:22:42,734
THEY ARE USING THAT SYSTEM TO

670
00:22:42,800 --> 00:22:46,500
MANIPULATE PEOPLE.

671
00:22:46,567 --> 00:22:47,400
>> Bill: LISTEN, MASTURBATION

672
00:22:47,467 --> 00:22:52,367
IS IN THE NEWS THIS WEEK, I FEEL

673
00:22:52,433 --> 00:22:53,400
BAD ABOUT CONSTANTLY MAKING FUN

674
00:22:53,467 --> 00:22:54,166
OF JEFFREY TOOBIN BUT WHEN YOU

675
00:22:54,233 --> 00:22:56,300
DO WHAT HE DID, PEOPLE ARE GOING

676
00:22:56,367 --> 00:22:59,934
TO MAKE FUN ESPECIALLY COMEDIANS

677
00:23:00,000 --> 00:23:02,033
COMEDIANS.

678
00:23:02,100 --> 00:23:05,200
THE NAME, TOOBIN, TO ME IT

679
00:23:05,266 --> 00:23:07,734
REALLY LENDS ITSELF.

680
00:23:07,800 --> 00:23:09,433
I THINK IT WILL PROBABLY BE A

681
00:23:09,500 --> 00:23:12,934
WORD IN ITSELF IN THE FUTURE

682
00:23:13,000 --> 00:23:14,166
MEANING TO MASTURBATE DURING A

683
00:23:14,233 --> 00:23:18,734
ZOOM MEETING, AS IN THAT MEETING

684
00:23:18,800 --> 00:23:20,800
WAS SO BORING I WAS TOOBIN THE

685
00:23:20,867 --> 00:23:23,000
WHOLE TIME.

686
00:23:23,066 --> 00:23:23,600
EVERY YEAR THE DICTIONARY PUTS

687
00:23:23,667 --> 00:23:27,300
OUT THE LIST OF NEW WORDS NILA

688
00:23:27,367 --> 00:23:32,166
CANDTHIS YEAR WITH COVID, THERES

689
00:23:32,233 --> 00:23:36,233
GOING TO BE JUST ONES RELATED TO

690
00:23:36,300 --> 00:23:38,467
PANDEMIC LIVING.

691
00:23:38,533 --> 00:23:41,934
LIKE TOOBIN, THE PRACTICE OF

692
00:23:42,000 --> 00:23:42,467
BUMPING ELBOWS INSTEAD OF

693
00:23:42,533 --> 00:23:46,100
SHAKING HANDS IS A FUNNY BONING.

694
00:23:46,166 --> 00:23:46,700
WHAT SHOPPERS EXPERIENCE WHEN

695
00:23:46,767 --> 00:23:50,400
THEY ACTUALLY FIND A CLOROX IS

696
00:23:50,467 --> 00:23:55,066
GOING TO BE A STOREGASM.

697
00:23:55,133 --> 00:23:58,133
SOMEONE DURING COVID TESTING

698
00:23:58,200 --> 00:24:00,000
SAYS LET ME DO IT MYSELF AND GET

699
00:24:00,066 --> 00:24:03,000
THE Q-TIP STUCK IN THE NOSE?

700
00:24:03,066 --> 00:24:05,333
THAT'S A NOSTRIL DUMB-ASS.

701
00:24:05,400 --> 00:24:08,400
GETTING AIRLIFTED TO THE

702
00:24:08,467 --> 00:24:09,100
HOSPITAL FOR TREATMENT

703
00:24:09,166 --> 00:24:11,200
UNAVAILABLE TO THE PUBLIC,

704
00:24:11,266 --> 00:24:14,367
THAT'S CALLED WEATHCARE.

705
00:24:14,433 --> 00:24:15,533
AND WHEN YOU'RE SCARED TO EVEN

706
00:24:15,600 --> 00:24:16,734
THINK ABOUT HOW LONG YOU BEEN

707
00:24:16,800 --> 00:24:25,667
WEARING THE SAME UNDERWEAR,

708
00:24:25,734 --> 00:24:40,834
THOSE ARE FRIGHT WHITEY'S.

709
00:24:40,900 --> 00:24:43,033
TRUMP SHOWED ME AT LEAST HE CAN

710
00:24:43,100 --> 00:24:44,233
MODULATE, HE MUST'VE BEEN VERY

711
00:24:44,300 --> 00:24:46,000
SCARED, HE USUALLY DOESN'T BUT

712
00:24:46,066 --> 00:24:46,567
HE WAS TRYING.

713
00:24:46,633 --> 00:24:48,600
THERE WAS PARTS OF IT THAT LOOKS

714
00:24:48,667 --> 00:24:50,033
ALMOST LIKE A NORMAL DEBATE, I

715
00:24:50,100 --> 00:24:51,300
HAD A GLIMMER OF NOSTALGIA LIKED

716
00:24:51,367 --> 00:24:53,767
WHEN THEY TALKED ABOUT MINIMUM

717
00:24:53,834 --> 00:24:54,300
WAGE.

718
00:24:54,367 --> 00:24:56,934
IT WAS NORMAL, THE REPUBLICAN

719
00:24:57,000 --> 00:25:00,000
SAID THAT RAP THEY'VE ALWAYS

720
00:25:00,066 --> 00:25:02,433
HAD, IT'S GOING TO CAUSE SMALL

721
00:25:02,500 --> 00:25:03,000
BUSINESSES, PEOPLE WILL GET

722
00:25:03,066 --> 00:25:06,333
FIRED IN THE DEMOCRATS AND I WAS

723
00:25:06,400 --> 00:25:07,233
LIKE THIS ISN'T SO NORMAL AND I

724
00:25:07,300 --> 00:25:13,233
WAS READING THIS THING TODAY, IT

725
00:25:13,300 --> 00:25:14,767
SAYS THE REAL UNEMPLOYMENT RATE

726
00:25:14,834 --> 00:25:15,000
IS 26.1.

727
00:25:15,066 --> 00:25:18,600
IT'S LISTED AT 7.9 BECAUSE IF

728
00:25:18,667 --> 00:25:19,633
YOU TAKE EVERYBODY WHO WAS A

729
00:25:19,700 --> 00:25:22,233
PART-TIME JOB AND WAS A

730
00:25:22,300 --> 00:25:24,433
FULL-TIME JOB, EVERYBODY WHO HAS

731
00:25:24,500 --> 00:25:26,166
NO JOB, EVERYONE WHO HAS JUST

732
00:25:26,233 --> 00:25:28,033
GIVEN UP, 26.1 -- THAT'S WHAT IT

733
00:25:28,100 --> 00:25:30,667
WAS IN THE DEPRESSION.

734
00:25:30,734 --> 00:25:32,633
THAT'S THE REAL UNEMPLOYMENT IN

735
00:25:32,700 --> 00:25:33,500
AMERICA, ONE OF THE

736
00:25:33,567 --> 00:25:34,066
REPERCUSSIONS OF THAT?

737
00:25:34,133 --> 00:25:38,100
WHAT'S THE REMEDY FOR THAT?

738
00:25:38,166 --> 00:25:39,934
>> I THINK THE REPERCUSSIONS ARE

739
00:25:40,000 --> 00:25:40,900
ALL OF A SUDDEN YOU'RE GOING TO

740
00:25:40,967 --> 00:25:42,266
SEE A SPIRAL DOWNWARD THAT YOU

741
00:25:42,333 --> 00:25:44,934
WON'T BE ABLE TO CONTAIN WHICH

742
00:25:45,000 --> 00:25:47,834
IS WHY GETTING STIMULUS PACKAGE

743
00:25:47,900 --> 00:25:48,500
IS ACTUALLY ESSENTIAL AS

744
00:25:48,567 --> 00:25:49,467
POSSIBLE.

745
00:25:49,533 --> 00:25:52,867
IF THERE IS NO WAY WE CAN

746
00:25:52,934 --> 00:25:53,433
RECOVER WITHOUT INCREASE IN

747
00:25:53,500 --> 00:25:56,033
FEDERAL INVESTMENTS.

748
00:25:56,100 --> 00:25:57,900
BEYOND THAT, IT HAS SHOWN THE

749
00:25:57,967 --> 00:26:00,633
FAULT LINES IN OUR DEMOCRACY.

750
00:26:00,700 --> 00:26:02,467
THE INEQUALITY, I CAN GIVE YOU A

751
00:26:02,533 --> 00:26:05,400
NUMBER THAT OVERLAYS THAT, THAT

752
00:26:05,467 --> 00:26:06,000
BASICALLY SHOWS THE BOTTOM

753
00:26:06,066 --> 00:26:08,333
QUARTILE ARE GOING TO SPEND THAT

754
00:26:08,400 --> 00:26:09,000
MUCH MORE TIME RECOVERING AND AS

755
00:26:09,066 --> 00:26:12,066
THE RICH PEOPLE -- THE STOCK

756
00:26:12,133 --> 00:26:13,900
MARKET IS FINE FOR THEM, THEY

757
00:26:13,967 --> 00:26:15,333
CAN ZOOM FROM HOME, THEY ARE

758
00:26:15,400 --> 00:26:15,633
DOING OKAY.

759
00:26:15,700 --> 00:26:19,266
THEY ARE GOING TO CONTINUE TO

760
00:26:19,333 --> 00:26:19,900
GET WEALTHIER AND WEALTHIER AND

761
00:26:19,967 --> 00:26:20,500
THOSE POOR FOLKS AT THE BOTTOM

762
00:26:20,567 --> 00:26:24,934
NEVER CATCH UP.

763
00:26:25,000 --> 00:26:25,500
WE NEED SYSTEMIC CAPITALISM

764
00:26:25,567 --> 00:26:26,100
REFORM IN THIS COUNTRY TO STOP

765
00:26:26,166 --> 00:26:29,667
WHAT'S HAPPENING RIGHT NOW.

766
00:26:29,734 --> 00:26:30,266
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

767
00:26:30,333 --> 00:26:32,800
>> Bill: WHAT DO YOU SAY THAT

768
00:26:32,867 --> 00:26:33,166
MR. WALL STREET?

769
00:26:33,233 --> 00:26:36,967
>> THREE THINGS TO THAT.

770
00:26:37,033 --> 00:26:37,533
WALL STREET IS GETTING ITS

771
00:26:37,600 --> 00:26:50,100
BAILOUT, THAT'S THE NARCOTIC OF

772
00:26:50,166 --> 00:26:50,700
FEDERAL RESERVE AND MONETARY

773
00:26:50,767 --> 00:26:50,934
THEORY.

774
00:26:51,000 --> 00:26:51,467
>> Bill: WALL STREET LOVES

775
00:26:51,533 --> 00:26:52,066
THESE COVID BAILOUTS, BECAUSE

776
00:26:52,133 --> 00:26:52,500
THEY GET THE MONEY.

777
00:26:52,567 --> 00:26:53,100
>> THEY GET THE MONEY BUT THE

778
00:26:53,166 --> 00:26:53,734
SECONDARY THING THAT'S HAPPENING

779
00:26:53,800 --> 00:26:54,300
IS YOU DO HAVE A SAFETY NET

780
00:26:54,367 --> 00:27:03,266
TODAY THAT'S DIFFERENT FROM THE

781
00:27:03,333 --> 00:27:03,667
29-33 DEPRESSION.

782
00:27:03,734 --> 00:27:04,266
YOU HAVE WORKERS COMPENSATION,

783
00:27:04,333 --> 00:27:04,900
UNEMPLOYMENT INSURANCE, WE NEED

784
00:27:04,967 --> 00:27:05,433
TO EXPAND THAT SAFETY NET

785
00:27:05,500 --> 00:27:05,934
FRANKLY WHETHER YOU'RE A

786
00:27:06,000 --> 00:27:06,500
CAPITALIST OR SOCIALIST, IT

787
00:27:06,567 --> 00:27:07,133
REALLY DOESN'T MATTER -- WE HAVE

788
00:27:07,200 --> 00:27:07,600
TO HELP THOSE PEOPLE.

789
00:27:07,667 --> 00:27:08,200
IF YOU DON'T DO THAT, YOU'RE

790
00:27:08,266 --> 00:27:08,834
GOING TO BREAK DOWN THE SOCIAL

791
00:27:08,900 --> 00:27:10,734
CONTRACT IN THE SYSTEM AND I

792
00:27:10,800 --> 00:27:12,567
THINK THE SENATOR IS ULTIMATELY

793
00:27:12,633 --> 00:27:13,633
VERY RIGHT ABOUT THIS THAT IT'S

794
00:27:13,700 --> 00:27:15,934
GOING TO TAKE A VERY LONG TIME

795
00:27:16,000 --> 00:27:19,333
FOR PEOPLE TO PULL OUT OF IT,

796
00:27:19,400 --> 00:27:20,700
THINGS LIKE ANDREW YANG'S

797
00:27:20,767 --> 00:27:21,300
UNIVERSAL BASE INCOME, WE HAVE

798
00:27:21,367 --> 00:27:23,900
TO LOOK AT THAT BECAUSE THE

799
00:27:23,967 --> 00:27:26,367
TOP-DOWN STRUCTURE IS NOT

800
00:27:26,433 --> 00:27:27,333
WORKING.

801
00:27:27,400 --> 00:27:28,133
FUNNELING IT THROUGH THE

802
00:27:28,200 --> 00:27:29,266
FEDERAL RESERVE INTO THE STOCK

803
00:27:29,333 --> 00:27:31,467
MARKET, HAVING THE PRESIDENT'S

804
00:27:31,533 --> 00:27:33,133
CHAMPION THAT AS HIS POLL

805
00:27:33,200 --> 00:27:34,133
NUMBERS IS NOT WORKING BECAUSE

806
00:27:34,200 --> 00:27:36,200
YOU HAVE 45% OF THE PEOPLE WHO

807
00:27:36,266 --> 00:27:38,700
ARE DEVASTATED RIGHT NOW.

808
00:27:38,767 --> 00:27:40,967
>> EVERY LOW-WAGE WORKER IN

809
00:27:41,033 --> 00:27:42,467
AMERICA IS A SUBSIDY TO THEIR

810
00:27:42,533 --> 00:27:42,734
EMPLOYER.

811
00:27:42,800 --> 00:27:44,600
WHEN YOU TALK ABOUT WE NEED THIS

812
00:27:44,667 --> 00:27:45,266
PROGRAM ARE THAT PROGRAM --

813
00:27:45,333 --> 00:27:47,967
GUESS WHAT, YOU NEED TO PAY

814
00:27:48,033 --> 00:27:49,400
THESE FOLKS MORE.

815
00:27:49,467 --> 00:27:50,300
YOU NEED TO GIVE THEM REAL

816
00:27:50,367 --> 00:27:52,133
ECONOMIC OPPORTUNITY.

817
00:27:52,200 --> 00:27:53,433
WHEN YOU SAY WE ARE GOING TO DO

818
00:27:53,500 --> 00:27:55,700
THIS AND DO THAT AND PROVIDE

819
00:27:55,767 --> 00:27:59,767
INCOME TAX CREDIT AND UNIVERSAL

820
00:27:59,834 --> 00:28:01,000
INCOME, GUESS WHAT, THAT'S A

821
00:28:01,066 --> 00:28:03,934
SUBSIDY TO PEOPLE WHO ARE HIRING

822
00:28:04,000 --> 00:28:07,266
PEOPLE AT 7:25 AND MAKING

823
00:28:07,333 --> 00:28:07,934
MILLIONS OF DOLLARS THEMSELVES.

824
00:28:08,000 --> 00:28:09,667
>> Bill: HOW DO PEOPLE LIVE?

825
00:28:09,734 --> 00:28:12,033
>> THEY DON'T, THEY LIVE WITH

826
00:28:12,100 --> 00:28:13,900
HOUSING ASSISTANCE, LIVE ON FOOD

827
00:28:13,967 --> 00:28:14,934
STAMPS, LIVE ON MEDICAID AND THE

828
00:28:15,000 --> 00:28:17,567
PRESIDENT IS TRYING TO TAKE THAT

829
00:28:17,633 --> 00:28:17,767
AWAY.

830
00:28:17,834 --> 00:28:19,333
WORKING PEOPLE'S HEALTH

831
00:28:19,400 --> 00:28:20,533
INSURANCE, IT'S AN ATROCITY AND

832
00:28:20,600 --> 00:28:23,033
NO WONDER PEOPLE ARE MAD.

833
00:28:23,100 --> 00:28:23,633
THEY JUST HAVE TO GET TO THE

834
00:28:23,700 --> 00:28:29,166
POLLS AND VOTE.

835
00:28:29,233 --> 00:28:29,934
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

836
00:28:30,000 --> 00:28:32,133
>> Bill: BUT WILL IT REALLY

837
00:28:32,200 --> 00:28:32,367
CHANGE?

838
00:28:32,433 --> 00:28:33,433
THAT'S THE THING.

839
00:28:33,500 --> 00:28:35,066
HERE'S THE THING COME ON THE

840
00:28:35,133 --> 00:28:39,133
MONEY WE ALREADY SPENT,

841
00:28:39,200 --> 00:28:39,767
2.000000000000 WAS THE FIRST

842
00:28:39,834 --> 00:28:40,567
COVID BELIEF.

843
00:28:40,633 --> 00:28:42,800
THAT'S AN ASTOUNDING NUMBER.

844
00:28:42,867 --> 00:28:48,433
EVEN TARP, WE WERE LIKE --

845
00:28:48,500 --> 00:28:49,633
$780 BILLION AND PEOPLE WERE

846
00:28:49,700 --> 00:28:50,667
LIKE OH, MY GOD, IN ONE SWIFT

847
00:28:50,734 --> 00:28:54,767
STROKE AND WE WENT TO 2.2.

848
00:28:54,834 --> 00:28:57,967
THE NEW DEAL ALL TOLD COST

849
00:28:58,033 --> 00:28:59,000
856 BILLION COME ADJUSTED.

850
00:28:59,066 --> 00:29:01,433
THE MARSHALL PLAN WAS

851
00:29:01,500 --> 00:29:03,667
144 BILLION, WE ARE INTO SOME

852
00:29:03,734 --> 00:29:04,333
CRAZY NUMBERS AND IT DOESN'T GET

853
00:29:04,400 --> 00:29:06,734
TO THE PEOPLE.

854
00:29:06,800 --> 00:29:08,867
THIS IS OUR FUNDAMENTAL

855
00:29:08,934 --> 00:29:12,000
PROBLEM -- GREED AND EVERY SNOUT

856
00:29:12,066 --> 00:29:15,567
IS IN THE TROUGH.

857
00:29:15,633 --> 00:29:18,266
ONLY 20% WENT FOR RELIEF AND

858
00:29:18,333 --> 00:29:18,967
FAMILIES.

859
00:29:19,033 --> 00:29:22,266
IT WENT TO FUCKING WALL STREET,

860
00:29:22,333 --> 00:29:22,900
250 BILLION IN TAX BREAKS FOR

861
00:29:22,967 --> 00:29:25,000
BUSINESSES SOME OF WHICH WERE

862
00:29:25,066 --> 00:29:26,400
MAKING MORE PROFITS DURING THE

863
00:29:26,467 --> 00:29:26,700
PANDEMIC.

864
00:29:26,767 --> 00:29:28,633
>> YOU LEFT OUT BIG TECH BECAUSE

865
00:29:28,700 --> 00:29:30,967
IT'S ALL SLANTING TOWARDS THEM.

866
00:29:31,033 --> 00:29:33,033
>> Bill: THAT TOO.

867
00:29:33,100 --> 00:29:37,033
THE PENTAGON GOT A BILLION TO

868
00:29:37,100 --> 00:29:38,900
PREVENT, PREPARE, RESPOND TO

869
00:29:38,967 --> 00:29:40,467
CORONAVIRUS, THEY SPENT IT ON

870
00:29:40,533 --> 00:29:41,767
SPACE SURVEILLANCE, JET ENGINES,

871
00:29:41,834 --> 00:29:44,467
AND DRESS UNIFORMS.

872
00:29:44,533 --> 00:29:47,233
>> NOT TO SEND YOU OFF THE EDGE

873
00:29:47,300 --> 00:29:48,967
BUT NORTH DAKOTA JUST TOOK THEIR

874
00:29:49,033 --> 00:29:50,000
COVID RELIEF MONEY AND THEY ARE

875
00:29:50,066 --> 00:29:52,166
GIVING IT TO PEOPLE SO THAT THEY

876
00:29:52,233 --> 00:29:54,900
CAN FRACK.

877
00:29:54,967 --> 00:29:57,066
>> Bill: THAT IS FUCKING

878
00:29:57,133 --> 00:29:59,500
RIDICULOUS.

879
00:29:59,567 --> 00:30:00,500
THEY TOOK COVID MONEY AND GAVE

880
00:30:00,567 --> 00:30:02,667
IT TO FRACKING?

881
00:30:02,734 --> 00:30:05,166
>> THEY ARE DOING THAT RIGHT

882
00:30:05,233 --> 00:30:05,333
NOW.

883
00:30:05,400 --> 00:30:07,133
IT'S ME WOULD LISTEN TO THIS

884
00:30:07,200 --> 00:30:12,166
ONE, A GAS STATION IN ARIZONA

885
00:30:12,233 --> 00:30:13,300
RECEIVED $150,000 TO THE

886
00:30:13,367 --> 00:30:14,033
PAYCHECK PROTECTION PROGRAM,

887
00:30:14,100 --> 00:30:16,300
THEY SPENT IT ON TRUMP

888
00:30:16,367 --> 00:30:20,367
BILLBOARDS.

889
00:30:20,433 --> 00:30:24,633
HOW CAN WE GET BEHIND SPENDING

890
00:30:24,700 --> 00:30:26,800
MONEY WHEN WE DON'T KNOW WHERE

891
00:30:26,867 --> 00:30:28,200
IT'S GOING WHAT'S SUPPOSED TO

892
00:30:28,300 --> 00:30:28,500
GO.

893
00:30:28,567 --> 00:30:30,667
>> WE COULD DIGITIZE THE MONEY

894
00:30:30,767 --> 00:30:32,633
AND DROP IT ON EVERYONE'S BANK

895
00:30:32,700 --> 00:30:33,734
ACCOUNT WHERE IT'S

896
00:30:33,800 --> 00:30:35,033
ADMINISTRATIVELY CLEAN BUT YOU

897
00:30:35,100 --> 00:30:36,066
HAVE LOBBYISTS AND POLITICIANS

898
00:30:36,133 --> 00:30:37,300
STANDING IN THE WAY, YOU HAVE

899
00:30:37,367 --> 00:30:38,266
VERY FEW POLITICIANS THAT WILL

900
00:30:38,333 --> 00:30:40,500
LOOK INTO A CAMERA AND EXPLAIN

901
00:30:40,567 --> 00:30:42,133
IT DIRECTLY TO THE AMERICAN

902
00:30:42,200 --> 00:30:42,500
PEOPLE.

903
00:30:42,567 --> 00:30:44,233
>> Bill: ROSS PEROT WAS RIGHT

904
00:30:44,300 --> 00:30:45,300
ALL THOSE YEARS AGO, HE HAD THE

905
00:30:45,367 --> 00:30:47,400
RIGHT ISSUES, DEBT AND YOU HAVE

906
00:30:47,467 --> 00:30:52,500
TO KILL K STREET TO.

907
00:30:52,567 --> 00:30:53,500
>> HE HAD THE CRAZY IN THE

908
00:30:53,567 --> 00:30:54,900
BASEMENT?

909
00:30:54,967 --> 00:30:57,400
>> Bill: HE WAS NOT A GREAT

910
00:30:57,467 --> 00:31:00,467
POLITICIAN.

911
00:31:00,533 --> 00:31:03,533
>> IT'S NOT A SWAMP, IT'S A

912
00:31:03,600 --> 00:31:06,066
GOLD PLATED HOT TUB WITHOUT A

913
00:31:06,133 --> 00:31:11,667
TERRAIN.

914
00:31:11,734 --> 00:31:11,900
DRAIN.

915
00:31:11,967 --> 00:31:14,367
>> THAN ALL THE HAND-WRINGING

916
00:31:14,400 --> 00:31:15,200
FROM PEOPLE LIKE LINDSEY GRAHAM,

917
00:31:15,266 --> 00:31:17,367
YOU CAN'T GET THE EXTRA $600 A

918
00:31:17,433 --> 00:31:20,433
WEEK ON UNEMPLOYMENT -- 70% OF

919
00:31:20,500 --> 00:31:21,333
OUR ECONOMY'S CONSUMPTION, IF

920
00:31:21,400 --> 00:31:22,533
YOU DON'T GET THE MONEY IN THE

921
00:31:22,600 --> 00:31:24,266
HANDS OF THE PEOPLE WHO NEED

922
00:31:24,333 --> 00:31:27,633
THINGS, YOU'RE NOT GOING TO

923
00:31:27,700 --> 00:31:29,266
RECOVER.

924
00:31:29,333 --> 00:31:30,667
HAND-WRINGING WAS ATROCIOUS,

925
00:31:30,734 --> 00:31:31,667
ABSOLUTELY ATROCIOUS THAT PEOPLE

926
00:31:31,734 --> 00:31:32,867
SO CONCERNED THAT SOMEONE IS

927
00:31:32,934 --> 00:31:35,266
GOING TO GET $600 AND THEN THEY

928
00:31:35,333 --> 00:31:36,700
WOULDN'T WORK FOR MINIMUM WAGE,

929
00:31:36,767 --> 00:31:38,700
THEY WILL GO BACK TO A MINIMUM

930
00:31:38,767 --> 00:31:39,367
WAGE JOB.

931
00:31:39,433 --> 00:31:41,000
PAY THEM MORE, PAY THEM MORE

932
00:31:41,066 --> 00:31:46,133
THAN $600 A MONTH.

933
00:31:46,200 --> 00:31:47,567
>> Bill: WHAT ARE AMERICANS,

934
00:31:47,633 --> 00:31:49,066
ONE OF THE CITIZENS GOING TO DO

935
00:31:49,133 --> 00:31:50,734
IF TRUMP DOESN'T LEAVE OR PUTS

936
00:31:50,800 --> 00:31:52,900
UP A BIG FIGHT?

937
00:31:52,967 --> 00:31:55,000
OR IF HE WINS BY VOTER

938
00:31:55,066 --> 00:31:55,533
SUPPRESSION, THAT'S HOW

939
00:31:55,600 --> 00:31:56,600
DICTATORS AROUND THE WORLD STAY

940
00:31:56,667 --> 00:31:58,734
IN OFFICE -- THEY HAD

941
00:31:58,800 --> 00:31:59,567
COLLECTIONS, THEY JUST RIGGED

942
00:31:59,633 --> 00:32:00,000
THEM.

943
00:32:00,066 --> 00:32:03,967
>> HE IS GOING, THIS GUY IS A

944
00:32:04,033 --> 00:32:06,133
COWARD, HE'S A KEYBOARD WARRIOR

945
00:32:06,200 --> 00:32:06,367
COWARD.

946
00:32:06,433 --> 00:32:07,600
HE'S NEVER HAD A DIRECT

947
00:32:07,667 --> 00:32:09,533
CONFRONTATION WITH ANYBODY IN

948
00:32:09,600 --> 00:32:10,400
HIS LIFE.

949
00:32:10,467 --> 00:32:11,133
EVEN WHEN CHRIS WALLACE WAS

950
00:32:11,200 --> 00:32:12,333
INTERVIEWING HIM IN THE SUMMER,

951
00:32:12,400 --> 00:32:13,433
HE PUT UP THE TWEETS OF CHRIS

952
00:32:13,500 --> 00:32:15,967
WALLACE, HE STARTED KISSING HIS

953
00:32:16,033 --> 00:32:17,000
ASS.

954
00:32:17,066 --> 00:32:19,200
HE IS A KEYBOARD WARRIOR COWARD.

955
00:32:19,266 --> 00:32:20,734
HE'S GOING TO GET ROUTED.

956
00:32:20,800 --> 00:32:24,400
IN THE NEXT 11 DAYS, HE'S GOING

957
00:32:24,467 --> 00:32:27,200
TO GET DESTROYED.

958
00:32:27,266 --> 00:32:28,200
>> Bill: 11 DAYS, THAT'S HOW

959
00:32:28,266 --> 00:32:32,000
LONG YOU HAD THAT JOB.

960
00:32:32,066 --> 00:32:43,133
NOW WE ARE CALLING THAT A SCARE

961
00:32:43,200 --> 00:32:43,567
SCARAMUCCI.

962
00:32:43,633 --> 00:32:45,367
>> TAKE A SCARAMUCCI ON ME, HE'S

963
00:32:45,433 --> 00:32:47,000
GOING, HE'S GOING TO GET ROUTED

964
00:32:47,066 --> 00:32:47,233
TO.

965
00:32:47,300 --> 00:32:48,033
>> Bill: HE'S GOING TO GET

966
00:32:48,100 --> 00:32:50,834
ROUTED, I DON'T KNOW IF HE'S

967
00:32:50,900 --> 00:32:54,333
GOING.

968
00:32:54,400 --> 00:32:56,033
>> HE IS THE MOST HATED

969
00:32:56,100 --> 00:32:58,166
COMMANDER IN CHIEF IN THE MODERN

970
00:32:58,233 --> 00:33:00,767
ERA.

971
00:33:00,834 --> 00:33:01,700
NO RETIRED GENERAL OR ACTIVE

972
00:33:01,767 --> 00:33:04,400
DUTY OFFICER LIKES THIS GUY.

973
00:33:04,467 --> 00:33:06,367
LOOK AT THE ENLISTED, THEY

974
00:33:06,433 --> 00:33:07,133
DISLIKE THEM TOO.

975
00:33:07,200 --> 00:33:09,066
>> Bill: OVER THE YEARS, HE'S

976
00:33:09,133 --> 00:33:11,133
BEEN AWFUL TO SO MANY PEOPLE WHO

977
00:33:11,200 --> 00:33:11,934
SOMEHOW STAYED LOYAL TO HIM,

978
00:33:12,000 --> 00:33:14,767
AMONG THEM YOU.

979
00:33:14,834 --> 00:33:16,567
>> BECAUSE HE WAS IN POWER.

980
00:33:16,633 --> 00:33:17,834
>> I WAS A LIFELONG REPUBLICAN

981
00:33:17,900 --> 00:33:18,900
AND I THOUGHT IT WAS MY DUTY TO

982
00:33:18,967 --> 00:33:24,633
TRY TO STAY.

983
00:33:24,700 --> 00:33:25,233
>> Bill: HE'S THE COMMANDER IN

984
00:33:25,333 --> 00:33:26,767
CHIEF AT THAT MOMENT.

985
00:33:26,834 --> 00:33:30,767
EVEN IF THEY HATE HIM, IF HE'S

986
00:33:30,834 --> 00:33:31,767
LIKE WELL ON YOUR COMMANDER IN

987
00:33:31,834 --> 00:33:33,800
CHIEF AND I SAY I'M STILL THE

988
00:33:33,867 --> 00:33:34,800
PRESIDENT BECAUSE THERE'S

989
00:33:34,867 --> 00:33:35,166
IRREGULARITIES.

990
00:33:35,233 --> 00:33:37,767
>> I'M HERE ON YOUR SHOW TO HELP

991
00:33:37,834 --> 00:33:38,433
THOSE PEOPLE WITH AN OFF RAMP TO

992
00:33:38,500 --> 00:33:41,600
GET TO REALITY AND WHERE

993
00:33:41,667 --> 00:33:42,467
DEMOCRACY NEEDS TO BE AND IT'S

994
00:33:42,533 --> 00:33:45,967
NOT HIM AND HE'S GOT TO GO.

995
00:33:46,033 --> 00:33:48,600
>> Bill: I HOPE SO.

996
00:33:48,667 --> 00:33:49,066
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

997
00:33:49,133 --> 00:33:51,233
I JUST WOULD LIKE TO KNOW IF YOU

998
00:33:51,300 --> 00:33:51,834
THINK AMERICAN CITIZENS ARE

999
00:33:51,900 --> 00:33:54,000
CAPABLE OF A GENERAL STRIKE,

1000
00:33:54,066 --> 00:33:57,367
LIKE THEY HAVE IN FRANCE -- TOO

1001
00:33:57,433 --> 00:33:58,133
MUCH IN FRANCE, ALWAYS, EVERY

1002
00:33:58,200 --> 00:33:59,233
TIME I'VE BEEN IN FRANCE, THEY

1003
00:33:59,300 --> 00:34:01,834
ARE ON STRIKE.

1004
00:34:01,900 --> 00:34:04,800
I CANNOT GET A BAGUETTE.

1005
00:34:04,867 --> 00:34:06,266
THEY ARE EITHER ON VACATION OR

1006
00:34:06,333 --> 00:34:07,200
ON STRIKE BUT THE WHOLE COUNTRY

1007
00:34:07,266 --> 00:34:09,567
IF THEY DON'T LIKE SOMETHING,

1008
00:34:09,633 --> 00:34:12,033
THE WHOLE COUNTRY SAYS WE'RE ALL

1009
00:34:12,100 --> 00:34:14,000
STOPPING.

1010
00:34:14,066 --> 00:34:14,967
WHAT AMERICA DO THAT?

1011
00:34:15,033 --> 00:34:17,166
>> YOU JUST SAID THE COVID

1012
00:34:17,233 --> 00:34:18,033
PLANE -- WE DON'T HAVE.

1013
00:34:18,100 --> 00:34:21,000
THIS BE WHAT I MEAN STOPPING ON

1014
00:34:21,066 --> 00:34:21,233
PURPOSE.

1015
00:34:21,300 --> 00:34:23,100
>> WE DON'T HAVE THAT KIND OF

1016
00:34:23,166 --> 00:34:23,834
COMMUNITY, WE ARE SO DISPARATE I

1017
00:34:23,900 --> 00:34:25,233
DON'T KNOW IF YOU COULD UNIFY US

1018
00:34:25,300 --> 00:34:30,433
LIKE THAT.

1019
00:34:30,500 --> 00:34:31,300
WHERE EVERYBODY JUST UNIVERSALLY

1020
00:34:31,367 --> 00:34:32,266
GOES ON STRIKE.

1021
00:34:32,333 --> 00:34:34,100
>> Bill: I THINK A GOOD 60% OF

1022
00:34:34,166 --> 00:34:36,667
THE COUNTRY WANTS TRUMP TO GO --

1023
00:34:36,734 --> 00:34:38,200
WE MIGHT FIND OUT IT'S MORE THAN

1024
00:34:38,266 --> 00:34:40,400
THAT, BUT THAT'S A LOT OF PEOPLE

1025
00:34:40,467 --> 00:34:47,600
IF THEY GOT IN THE STREETS.

1026
00:34:47,667 --> 00:34:49,834
AFTER HE WAS ELECTED WE HAD THE

1027
00:34:49,900 --> 00:34:54,800
PUSSY RIOT -- THE PUSSY HATS.

1028
00:34:54,867 --> 00:34:58,700
>> Bill: THE WOMEN'S MARCH.

1029
00:34:58,767 --> 00:35:00,667
PUSSY RIOT IS THAT BAND IN

1030
00:35:00,734 --> 00:35:02,533
RUSSIA, PUSSY HAT -- IT WASN'T A

1031
00:35:02,600 --> 00:35:04,066
RIOT, OTHER THAN THAT I'M FINE.

1032
00:35:04,133 --> 00:35:06,266
IT LASTED A FEW DAYS.

1033
00:35:06,333 --> 00:35:07,433
>> THAT IS NOT FAIR.

1034
00:35:07,500 --> 00:35:09,967
>> Bill: I APPLAUD THEM.

1035
00:35:10,033 --> 00:35:12,500
>> THEY WENT IN THEY STARTED

1036
00:35:12,567 --> 00:35:14,200
ORGANIZING AND LET ME TELL YOU,

1037
00:35:14,266 --> 00:35:15,867
IN THE 100TH ANNIVERSARY OF THE

1038
00:35:15,934 --> 00:35:17,400
WOMEN'S RIGHT TO VOTE, WOMEN

1039
00:35:17,467 --> 00:35:19,467
STARTED THIS MOVEMENT OF THE DAY

1040
00:35:19,533 --> 00:35:20,433
AFTER THE INAUGURAL AND THEY'RE

1041
00:35:20,500 --> 00:35:22,300
GOING TO END IT ON ELECTION DAY

1042
00:35:22,367 --> 00:35:24,900
AND HIS ASS IS GOING OUT.

1043
00:35:24,967 --> 00:35:26,233
>> Bill: WILL END ON THAT

1044
00:35:26,300 --> 00:35:35,333
POSITIVE NOTE.

1045
00:35:35,400 --> 00:35:36,900
HE IS THE

1046
00:35:36,967 --> 00:35:37,600
HE'S THE OSCAR AND GOLDEN GLOBE

1047
00:35:37,667 --> 00:35:38,233
AWARD WINNING ACTOR WHOSE NEW

1048
00:35:38,300 --> 00:35:38,834
BOOK IS CALLED "GREENLIGHTS":

1049
00:35:38,900 --> 00:35:41,934
MATTHEW McCONAUGHEY.

1050
00:35:42,000 --> 00:35:44,333
>> THANK YOU FOR HAVING ME.

1051
00:35:44,400 --> 00:35:46,066
>> Bill: FOR A GUY WHO FOR SO

1052
00:35:46,133 --> 00:35:48,467
LONG WAS KNOWN AS A BEACH BUM

1053
00:35:48,533 --> 00:35:49,967
WHO DIDN'T OWN A SHIRT, YOU'RE A

1054
00:35:50,033 --> 00:35:51,967
VERY DEEP GUY.

1055
00:35:52,033 --> 00:35:56,233
YOU REALLY ARE.

1056
00:35:56,300 --> 00:35:57,633
WHY DON'T YOU START OFF BY

1057
00:35:57,700 --> 00:35:59,100
TELLING PEOPLE WHAT THAT TITLE

1058
00:35:59,166 --> 00:36:00,166
MEANS BECAUSE I THINK IT'S SO

1059
00:36:00,233 --> 00:36:02,600
IMPORTANT TO THE BOOK.

1060
00:36:02,667 --> 00:36:06,633
>> >> I'VE BEEN KEEPING A DIARY

1061
00:36:06,700 --> 00:36:09,367
FOR 36 YEARS AND FINALLY READ

1062
00:36:09,433 --> 00:36:10,467
THEM TO SEE WHAT THEY WERE AND

1063
00:36:10,533 --> 00:36:15,066
WHAT I FOUND WAS STORIES,

1064
00:36:15,133 --> 00:36:16,567
PEOPLE, PLACES, AND A WHOLE LOT

1065
00:36:16,633 --> 00:36:17,266
OF BUMPER STICKERS.

1066
00:36:17,333 --> 00:36:19,000
I LOOKED AT THOSE AND I FOUND

1067
00:36:19,066 --> 00:36:21,066
THE CENTRAL THEME OF GREEN LIGHT

1068
00:36:21,133 --> 00:36:22,033
SPIRIT OF I'VE CAUGHT TWO GREEN

1069
00:36:22,133 --> 00:36:23,400
LIGHTS IN MY LIFE, GREEN LIGHTS

1070
00:36:23,467 --> 00:36:25,066
ARE THINGS THAT WE LIKE, THEY

1071
00:36:25,133 --> 00:36:32,467
GIVE US FREEDOM, THEY SAY GO A

1072
00:36:32,533 --> 00:36:33,700
LOT OF WAYS THEY ARE THROWN IN

1073
00:36:33,767 --> 00:36:35,567
MY LAP AND I GOT VERY FORTUNATE

1074
00:36:35,633 --> 00:36:38,066
AND DID GOOD THINGS WITH THEM.

1075
00:36:38,133 --> 00:36:40,166
I ALSO FOUND THAT A LOT OF THE

1076
00:36:40,233 --> 00:36:41,033
YELLOW AND RED LIGHTS IN MY

1077
00:36:41,100 --> 00:36:44,100
LIFE, CRISIS, HARDSHIPS, YEARS

1078
00:36:44,166 --> 00:36:46,033
ABROAD WHERE I WAS LOST HAD TO

1079
00:36:46,100 --> 00:36:47,433
GREEN LIGHT ASSETS IN THEM THAT

1080
00:36:47,500 --> 00:36:49,467
REVEALED THEMSELVES LATER IN

1081
00:36:49,533 --> 00:36:51,100
LIFE.

1082
00:36:51,166 --> 00:36:54,066
WHEN WE REALIZE THERE IS A GREEN

1083
00:36:54,133 --> 00:36:55,467
LIGHT ASSET, IT'S SORT OF

1084
00:36:55,533 --> 00:36:55,900
RELATIVE.

1085
00:36:55,967 --> 00:36:58,100
WE NOTICED IT IN THE MOMENT, WE

1086
00:36:58,166 --> 00:36:59,934
NOTICE IT ON HER DEATHBED BUT I

1087
00:37:00,000 --> 00:37:00,934
DO BELIEVE THAT EVENTUALLY IN

1088
00:37:01,000 --> 00:37:02,367
THE REARVIEW MIRROR OF LIFE, ALL

1089
00:37:02,433 --> 00:37:03,567
THE YELLOW AND RED LIGHTS TO

1090
00:37:03,633 --> 00:37:08,533
EVENTUALLY TURN GREEN.

1091
00:37:08,600 --> 00:37:14,767
>> Bill: YOU GOT THAT DOWN.

1092
00:37:14,834 --> 00:37:16,500
SO MUCH OF THE BOOK -- YOUR

1093
00:37:16,567 --> 00:37:18,266
MEMBER THAT OLD DOSE ACHE IS

1094
00:37:18,333 --> 00:37:18,767
COMMERCIAL WITH THE MOST

1095
00:37:18,834 --> 00:37:21,533
INTERESTING MAN IN THE WORLD WAS

1096
00:37:21,600 --> 00:37:22,533
NEXT >> YEAH, YEAH.

1097
00:37:22,600 --> 00:37:24,367
>> Bill: SOME OF THE PASSAGES

1098
00:37:24,433 --> 00:37:25,400
ARE LIKE COPY FOR THE NEXT MOST

1099
00:37:25,467 --> 00:37:29,300
INTERESTING MAN IN THE WORLD.

1100
00:37:29,367 --> 00:37:31,700
HE SMOKED PEYOTE IN MEXICO IN A

1101
00:37:31,767 --> 00:37:32,934
CAGE WITH A MOUNTAIN LION, YOU

1102
00:37:33,000 --> 00:37:35,200
DID THAT.

1103
00:37:35,266 --> 00:37:37,500
YOU WERE BLACKMAILED IN THE

1104
00:37:37,567 --> 00:37:38,600
HAVING SEX AT 15.

1105
00:37:38,667 --> 00:37:40,133
HOW DID THAT EVEN HAPPEN, I

1106
00:37:40,200 --> 00:37:43,066
WOULD'VE BEEN THE BLACKMAILER AT

1107
00:37:43,133 --> 00:37:46,166
15.

1108
00:37:46,233 --> 00:37:47,934
>> I DIDN'T GIVE A WHOLE LOT OF

1109
00:37:48,000 --> 00:37:50,200
DETAILS ON THAT, I WAS RAISED

1110
00:37:50,266 --> 00:37:52,633
THINKING I WASN'T GOING TO LOSE

1111
00:37:52,700 --> 00:37:54,066
MY VIRGINITY UNTIL I WAS MARRIED

1112
00:37:54,133 --> 00:37:55,200
AND AT LEAST IF I DID IT WAS

1113
00:37:55,266 --> 00:37:56,900
SOMEONE I WOULD HAVE A REALLY

1114
00:37:56,967 --> 00:37:57,567
GOOD RELATIONSHIP WITH.

1115
00:37:57,633 --> 00:38:00,166
NEITHER OF THOSE HAPPENED.

1116
00:38:00,233 --> 00:38:01,333
THIS GIRL WASN'T MUCH OLDER AND

1117
00:38:01,400 --> 00:38:04,567
AS I WRITE IN THE BOOK, I SAID I

1118
00:38:04,633 --> 00:38:06,734
WAS VERY SURE THE TIME I WAS

1119
00:38:06,800 --> 00:38:08,400
GOING TO HELL FOR THE ACT AND

1120
00:38:08,467 --> 00:38:09,433
NOW I MERELY HOPE THAT IS NOT

1121
00:38:09,500 --> 00:38:13,300
THE CASE.

1122
00:38:13,367 --> 00:38:16,500
>> Bill: YOU ARE A PHILOSOPHER

1123
00:38:16,567 --> 00:38:18,233
PHILOSOPHER, THAT'S THE

1124
00:38:18,300 --> 00:38:19,967
INTERESTING PART AND YOU DID

1125
00:38:20,033 --> 00:38:20,767
SOMETHING IN YOUR CAREER WHICH

1126
00:38:20,834 --> 00:38:22,233
IS VERY RARE, YOU CHANGE THE

1127
00:38:22,300 --> 00:38:25,233
PERCEPTION OF YOURSELF.

1128
00:38:25,300 --> 00:38:26,834
THAT'S THE HARDEST THING TO DO

1129
00:38:26,900 --> 00:38:28,633
IN SHOW BUSINESS, WHEN YOU GET A

1130
00:38:28,700 --> 00:38:30,633
LABEL ON YOU, IT STICKS AND YOU

1131
00:38:30,700 --> 00:38:32,433
MANAGED TO FIND A WAY TO NOT BE

1132
00:38:32,500 --> 00:38:35,967
THE BEACH BUM WITH THE SHIRT

1133
00:38:36,033 --> 00:38:37,834
OFF, TO BE THIS GUY.

1134
00:38:37,900 --> 00:38:39,066
YOU WANT TO TELL THE KIDS HOW TO

1135
00:38:39,133 --> 00:38:42,533
DO THAT?

1136
00:38:42,600 --> 00:38:44,633
>> WHAT HAPPENED WAS I WAS A ROM

1137
00:38:44,700 --> 00:38:45,934
CALM GUY, I WAS THE SHIRTLESS

1138
00:38:46,000 --> 00:38:49,000
GUY IN THE, THAT WAS FINE, I

1139
00:38:49,066 --> 00:38:52,934
SAID AT THEM, I WILL SAY IT NOW.

1140
00:38:53,000 --> 00:38:56,100
THOSE ROM COMES I WAS DOING WERE

1141
00:38:56,166 --> 00:38:57,333
PAYING THE RENT FOR THE HOUSES

1142
00:38:57,400 --> 00:38:59,500
ON THE BEACH WHERE I WAS

1143
00:38:59,567 --> 00:39:02,767
SHIRTLESS.

1144
00:39:02,834 --> 00:39:04,166
I DID NOTICE THAT THAT'S ALL

1145
00:39:04,233 --> 00:39:06,567
THAT I WAS IN THE PUBLIC EYE,

1146
00:39:06,633 --> 00:39:08,367
THAT'S ALL I WAS TO STUDIO

1147
00:39:08,433 --> 00:39:09,734
FINANCIALS IN HOLLYWOOD, OTHER

1148
00:39:09,800 --> 00:39:11,000
ROLES I WANTED TO DO, THEY WERE

1149
00:39:11,066 --> 00:39:12,000
NOT BEING OFFERED, THEY WERE NOT

1150
00:39:12,066 --> 00:39:14,133
AN OPTION.

1151
00:39:14,200 --> 00:39:16,867
AT A TIME WHERE I SAID I CAN'T

1152
00:39:16,934 --> 00:39:20,266
DO WHAT I WANT TO DO, IT WAS A

1153
00:39:20,333 --> 00:39:21,367
SCARY PROPOSITION.

1154
00:39:21,433 --> 00:39:23,300
I CHECKED WITH MY WIFE AND MY

1155
00:39:23,367 --> 00:39:24,467
MONEY MANAGER AND SAID I'M GOING

1156
00:39:24,533 --> 00:39:27,200
TO STOP DOING ROM COMES -- GUESS

1157
00:39:27,266 --> 00:39:27,433
WHAT?

1158
00:39:27,500 --> 00:39:28,367
OKAY, THAT'S ALL THAT CAME IN

1159
00:39:28,433 --> 00:39:30,800
FOR SIX MONTHS.

1160
00:39:30,867 --> 00:39:33,500
I HAD A $14.5 MILLION OFFER FOR

1161
00:39:33,567 --> 00:39:36,066
ONE AND THAT WAS HARDER TO SAY

1162
00:39:36,133 --> 00:39:39,033
NO TO -- REALLY, YOU'RE GOING TO

1163
00:39:39,100 --> 00:39:39,900
SAY NO TO THIS?

1164
00:39:39,967 --> 00:39:41,867
I FINALLY DID AND FOR 14 MONTHS

1165
00:39:41,934 --> 00:39:44,266
AFTER THAT NOTHING CAME IN.

1166
00:39:44,333 --> 00:39:45,467
THE AGENT SAYS NO ONE HAS

1167
00:39:45,533 --> 00:39:46,100
MENTIONED YOUR NAME.

1168
00:39:46,166 --> 00:39:51,266
A 20 MONTH SABBATICAL FROM

1169
00:39:51,333 --> 00:39:52,233
HOLLYWOOD, BEING GONE, NOT

1170
00:39:52,300 --> 00:39:53,867
SEEING ME SHIRTLESS ON THE

1171
00:39:53,934 --> 00:39:56,066
BEACH, NOT SEEING ME IN THE

1172
00:39:56,133 --> 00:40:00,934
LIVING ROOM OR THE THEATER AND A

1173
00:40:01,000 --> 00:40:03,433
ROM CALM, I BECAME A GOOD IDEA.

1174
00:40:03,500 --> 00:40:05,934
GUESS WHO'S A GOOD IDEA FOR

1175
00:40:06,000 --> 00:40:11,166
LILINCOLN LAWYER, DALLAS BUYERS

1176
00:40:11,233 --> 00:40:11,600
CLUB, MAGIC MIKE.

1177
00:40:11,667 --> 00:40:12,867
>> Bill: THAT ONE YOU TURNED

1178
00:40:12,934 --> 00:40:14,767
DOWN FOR 14.5, WHAT WAS IT AND

1179
00:40:14,834 --> 00:40:16,066
WHO DID IT?

1180
00:40:16,133 --> 00:40:18,300
>> I'M NOT TELLING, IT DIDN'T

1181
00:40:18,367 --> 00:40:22,900
GET MADE.

1182
00:40:22,967 --> 00:40:23,467
>> Bill: THE OTHER REASON I

1183
00:40:23,533 --> 00:40:26,600
THINK YOU WERE ABLE TO DO IT IS

1184
00:40:26,667 --> 00:40:31,600
YOU HAVE AN INNATE LIKABILITY,

1185
00:40:31,667 --> 00:40:33,066
WHICH IS RARE BUT IT USUALLY

1186
00:40:33,133 --> 00:40:33,734
CARRIES THE DAY.

1187
00:40:33,800 --> 00:40:35,333
HE TALKED ABOUT YOUR BIG BREAK

1188
00:40:35,400 --> 00:40:36,633
THROUGH A TIME TO KILL, THE

1189
00:40:36,700 --> 00:40:39,333
OTHER GUY WHO WAS UP FOR IT WAS

1190
00:40:39,400 --> 00:40:41,300
THE OTHER ACTOR IN YOUR

1191
00:40:41,367 --> 00:40:42,700
GENERATION WHO IS THE ONLY ONE,

1192
00:40:42,767 --> 00:40:44,266
THE ONLY ONE WHO HAS THE SAME

1193
00:40:44,333 --> 00:40:49,300
AMOUNT OF LIKABILITY.

1194
00:40:49,367 --> 00:40:51,700
>> MY BROTHER FROM ANOTHER

1195
00:40:51,767 --> 00:40:52,533
MOTHER?

1196
00:40:52,600 --> 00:40:53,667
>> Bill: EUROPE BOTH SONS OF

1197
00:40:53,734 --> 00:40:54,967
TEXAS, YOU HAVE THIS WEIRD

1198
00:40:55,033 --> 00:40:55,900
FAMILY HISTORY WHICH I'LL GET

1199
00:40:55,967 --> 00:40:56,667
INTO IT FOR A MINUTE, YOU SURE

1200
00:40:56,734 --> 00:41:02,500
YOU'RE NOT HE'S REAL BROTHER.

1201
00:41:02,567 --> 00:41:04,066
>> MY MOM HAS A STORY THAT MAKES

1202
00:41:04,133 --> 00:41:07,467
US THINK WE MIGHT BE RELATED.

1203
00:41:07,533 --> 00:41:08,367
IF >> Bill: MUST LEAVE THAT

1204
00:41:08,433 --> 00:41:13,667
OUT THERE.

1205
00:41:13,734 --> 00:41:15,100
YOU WERE BORN TO PARENTS WHO

1206
00:41:15,166 --> 00:41:16,367
WERE EACH ON THEIR THIRD

1207
00:41:16,433 --> 00:41:19,900
MARRIAGE TO EACH OTHER.

1208
00:41:19,967 --> 00:41:21,667
I'VE HEARD OF PEOPLE GETTING

1209
00:41:21,734 --> 00:41:22,700
MARRIED TWICE IN FACT I GOOGLED

1210
00:41:22,767 --> 00:41:25,133
IT.

1211
00:41:25,200 --> 00:41:27,667
LOTS OF REALLY PROMINENT,

1212
00:41:27,734 --> 00:41:29,834
INTERESTING, GOOD PEOPLE,

1213
00:41:29,900 --> 00:41:30,467
LARRY KING, ELIZABETH TAYLOR,

1214
00:41:30,533 --> 00:41:32,700
RICHARD BURTON, EMINEM DID IT,

1215
00:41:32,767 --> 00:41:33,800
RICHARD PRYOR DID IT, DON

1216
00:41:33,867 --> 00:41:35,300
JOHNSON AND MELANIE GRIFFITH DID

1217
00:41:35,367 --> 00:41:40,166
IT.

1218
00:41:40,233 --> 00:41:43,233
JUDGE FUCKING JUDY DID IT, SHE

1219
00:41:43,300 --> 00:41:46,967
OVERRULED HERSELF.

1220
00:41:47,033 --> 00:41:47,567
SPEAK OUT TWICE.

1221
00:41:47,633 --> 00:41:48,300
>> Bill: YOUR PARENTS DID IT

1222
00:41:48,367 --> 00:41:50,867
THREE TIMES.

1223
00:41:50,934 --> 00:41:53,000
HOW DO YOU THINK THAT EFFECTIVE

1224
00:41:53,066 --> 00:41:53,166
YOU?

1225
00:41:53,233 --> 00:41:55,700
>> GREAT QUESTION.

1226
00:41:55,767 --> 00:41:57,333
LET ME THROW THIS AT YOU,

1227
00:41:57,400 --> 00:41:59,734
CAMILLA WHO I'M NOW MARRIED TO,

1228
00:41:59,800 --> 00:42:00,734
HER PARENTS DID THE INVERSE OF

1229
00:42:00,800 --> 00:42:01,667
WHAT MINE DID.

1230
00:42:01,734 --> 00:42:05,100
THEY WERE MARRIED TWICE AND

1231
00:42:05,166 --> 00:42:06,934
DIVORCED THREE TIMES, THEY ENDED

1232
00:42:07,000 --> 00:42:07,233
UP DIVORCED.

1233
00:42:07,300 --> 00:42:09,400
WE CAME INTO THIS GOING THIS

1234
00:42:09,467 --> 00:42:13,033
WHOLE MARRIAGE THING, THEY ARE

1235
00:42:13,100 --> 00:42:14,100
REALLY GOOD LESSONS OF CAN'T

1236
00:42:14,133 --> 00:42:15,266
LIVE WITH YOU, CAN'T LIVE

1237
00:42:15,333 --> 00:42:21,200
WITHOUT YOU.

1238
00:42:21,266 --> 00:42:22,734
MY PARENTS LIKED THEIR

1239
00:42:22,800 --> 00:42:23,367
RELATIONSHIP BEING A TITLE WAVE

1240
00:42:23,433 --> 00:42:27,233
IN THE PACIFIC OCEAN.

1241
00:42:27,300 --> 00:42:29,734
I DIDN'T WANT TO GO MARRY

1242
00:42:29,800 --> 00:42:31,400
SOMEONE WHO IS THAT MUCH LIKE MY

1243
00:42:31,467 --> 00:42:33,333
MOTHER WHO NEEDED THAT MUCH

1244
00:42:33,400 --> 00:42:34,767
RESISTANCE CONTINUALLY TO GET

1245
00:42:34,834 --> 00:42:35,533
ALONG.

1246
00:42:35,600 --> 00:42:38,166
I WANT TO KEEP THE PASSION BUT I

1247
00:42:38,233 --> 00:42:39,133
LIKE A MORE SLOW-MOVING RIVER

1248
00:42:39,200 --> 00:42:41,734
WITH SOME RAPIDS ALONG THE WAY.

1249
00:42:41,800 --> 00:42:43,266
IT DIDN'T SCARE US AWAY FROM

1250
00:42:43,333 --> 00:42:45,567
MARRIAGE BUT IT MADE US TAKE OUR

1251
00:42:45,633 --> 00:42:47,033
TIME, A LITTLE EXTRA TIME BEFORE

1252
00:42:47,100 --> 00:42:48,433
WE DECIDED THIS IS WHAT WE WANT

1253
00:42:48,500 --> 00:42:49,567
TO DO, WE WANT TO CHOOSE EACH

1254
00:42:49,633 --> 00:42:52,834
OTHER AND SPEND OUR LIVES

1255
00:42:52,900 --> 00:42:53,100
TOGETHER.

1256
00:42:53,166 --> 00:42:54,300
>> Bill: IT'S INTERESTING

1257
00:42:54,367 --> 00:42:55,767
READING ABOUT YOUR FAMILY

1258
00:42:55,834 --> 00:42:56,533
VIOLENCE, THAT'S A BIG THEME IN

1259
00:42:56,600 --> 00:42:58,900
YOUR BOOK.

1260
00:42:58,967 --> 00:43:03,033
VIOLENCE FOLLOWED BY LOVE.

1261
00:43:03,100 --> 00:43:05,333
YOU TALK ABOUT -- YOU LOVE YOUR

1262
00:43:05,400 --> 00:43:06,967
FATHER VERY MUCH BUT HE WHIPPED

1263
00:43:07,033 --> 00:43:08,367
YOUR ASS AND YOU DESCRIBE A

1264
00:43:08,433 --> 00:43:09,567
FIGHT IN THE KITCHEN BETWEEN

1265
00:43:09,633 --> 00:43:11,066
YOUR MOTHER AND YOUR FATHER LIKE

1266
00:43:11,133 --> 00:43:12,967
A BAR FIGHT WITH A KNIFE AND A

1267
00:43:13,033 --> 00:43:14,500
BROKEN BOTTLE AND THEY WIND UP

1268
00:43:14,567 --> 00:43:17,533
FUCKING ON THE FLOOR.

1269
00:43:17,600 --> 00:43:18,767
YOU TALK ABOUT DEFENDING YOUR

1270
00:43:18,834 --> 00:43:20,667
FATHER AT A BAR AND HE LOVED YOU

1271
00:43:20,734 --> 00:43:22,200
FOR IT BECAUSE YOU GOT THE SHIT

1272
00:43:22,266 --> 00:43:25,467
BEAT OUT OF YOU, AND THEN YOU

1273
00:43:25,533 --> 00:43:26,433
HAVE THESE DREAMS, RECURRING

1274
00:43:26,500 --> 00:43:27,834
DREAMS WHERE YOU'RE SURROUNDED

1275
00:43:27,900 --> 00:43:29,166
BY THE MOST VIOLENT CREATURES IN

1276
00:43:29,233 --> 00:43:31,467
NATURE, THE SHARK, THE PYTHON,

1277
00:43:31,533 --> 00:43:35,166
THE CROCODILE AND THEN YOU

1278
00:43:35,233 --> 00:43:38,333
COME -- IT'S A WET DREAM.

1279
00:43:38,400 --> 00:43:39,667
>> NOT A NIGHTMARE, LOOK AT WHAT

1280
00:43:39,734 --> 00:43:41,600
THE OUTCOME OF EACH ONE OF THOSE

1281
00:43:41,667 --> 00:43:41,767
WAS.

1282
00:43:41,834 --> 00:43:43,867
THE END UP WITH LOVE WINNING.

1283
00:43:43,934 --> 00:43:45,600
MY MOM AND DAD GET IN A FIGHT,

1284
00:43:45,667 --> 00:43:47,233
THEY END UP MAKING LOVE ON THE

1285
00:43:47,300 --> 00:43:47,467
FLOOR.

1286
00:43:47,533 --> 00:43:48,900
THEY GET DIVORCED TWICE, THE END

1287
00:43:48,967 --> 00:43:51,000
OF BEING MARRIED.

1288
00:43:51,066 --> 00:43:53,266
I HAVE DREAMS THAT HAVE THE

1289
00:43:53,333 --> 00:43:54,233
ELEMENTS OF ABSOLUTE NIGHTMARES

1290
00:43:54,300 --> 00:43:55,100
BY ANY PRACTICAL LOOK AT IT IN

1291
00:43:55,166 --> 00:44:00,033
THE END UP BEING A WET DREAM.

1292
00:44:00,100 --> 00:44:01,867
THE LOVE IN OUR FAMILY AND THE

1293
00:44:01,934 --> 00:44:05,266
VIOLENCE IN OUR FAMILY, MUCH

1294
00:44:05,333 --> 00:44:07,500
MORE COMPASSION AND GOOD TIMES

1295
00:44:07,567 --> 00:44:09,800
AND HUGGING -- I TELL THE

1296
00:44:09,867 --> 00:44:11,600
STORIES ABOUT OUR FAMILY THAT

1297
00:44:11,667 --> 00:44:12,400
HAVE TO DO WITH CONSEQUENCES AND

1298
00:44:12,467 --> 00:44:14,500
HAVE SOME VIOLENCE IN THEM

1299
00:44:14,567 --> 00:44:16,000
BECAUSE THOSE ARE THE TIME THAT

1300
00:44:16,066 --> 00:44:17,433
THE LOVE WHERE WE HAD WAS TESTED

1301
00:44:17,500 --> 00:44:18,500
THE MOST AND WAS NEVER GOING TO

1302
00:44:18,567 --> 00:44:21,033
GET BEAT.

1303
00:44:21,100 --> 00:44:22,667
I THINK THAT'S WHY I ADORE THESE

1304
00:44:22,734 --> 00:44:24,200
STORIES AND TELL THEM AS LOVE

1305
00:44:24,266 --> 00:44:25,467
STORIES SO MUCH BECAUSE THEY ARE

1306
00:44:25,533 --> 00:44:27,233
TIMES WHEN THAT LOVE GOT TESTED

1307
00:44:27,300 --> 00:44:28,567
BUT THE LOVE WAS NEVER GOING TO

1308
00:44:28,633 --> 00:44:30,100
BE IN QUESTION, THE LOVE WAS

1309
00:44:30,166 --> 00:44:31,667
NEVER GOING TO LOSE THE FIGHT

1310
00:44:31,734 --> 00:44:34,100
AND IT NEVER DID.

1311
00:44:34,166 --> 00:44:35,066
>> Bill: I'M LOOKING FORWARD

1312
00:44:35,133 --> 00:44:36,533
TO YOUR THIRD ACT WHENEVER

1313
00:44:36,600 --> 00:44:38,033
THAT'S GOING TO START BECAUSE I

1314
00:44:38,100 --> 00:44:39,333
KNOW YOU'RE A SEEKER AND IT WILL

1315
00:44:39,400 --> 00:44:42,600
BE SOMETHING DIFFERENT.

1316
00:44:42,667 --> 00:44:43,200
THANK YOU FOR DOING THIS, KEEP

1317
00:44:43,266 --> 00:44:47,867
AUSTIN WEIRD.

1318
00:44:47,934 --> 00:44:51,166
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

1319
00:44:51,233 --> 00:44:51,400
>> Bill:

1320
00:44:51,467 --> 00:44:57,667
NOW IT'S TIME FOR NEW RULES!

1321
00:44:57,734 --> 00:44:58,934
NEW RULE: IF YOU BUY THIS

1322
00:44:59,033 --> 00:45:00,266
"SILICONE FACE SLIMMER,"

1323
00:45:00,333 --> 00:45:02,033
DESIGNED TO STRETCH THE MOUTH

1324
00:45:02,100 --> 00:45:03,467
MUSCLES, THEREBY SLIMMING YOUR

1325
00:45:03,533 --> 00:45:04,367
FACE, YOU CAN'T BE SURPRISED

1326
00:45:04,433 --> 00:45:05,433
WHEN YOUR HUSBAND LEAVES YOU FOR

1327
00:45:05,500 --> 00:45:13,834
A BLOW-UP DOLL.

1328
00:45:13,900 --> 00:45:14,300
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

1329
00:45:14,367 --> 00:45:15,567
SOPHISTICATED HUMOR WE DO.

1330
00:45:15,633 --> 00:45:17,000
NEW RULE: NEVER BUY ANYTHING

1331
00:45:17,066 --> 00:45:18,233
FROM AN AD WHERE A KID AT

1332
00:45:18,300 --> 00:45:20,734
BREAKFAST SAYS "DAD, YOU ROCK."

1333
00:45:20,800 --> 00:45:22,734
IF DAD ACTUALLY "ROCKED" HE'D BE

1334
00:45:22,800 --> 00:45:24,266
ON TOUR, DOING BLOW AND TRASHING

1335
00:45:24,333 --> 00:45:26,900
HOTEL ROOMS.

1336
00:45:26,967 --> 00:45:28,000
HERE'S HOW YOU KNOW HE DOESN'T

1337
00:45:28,066 --> 00:45:29,233
"ROCK."

1338
00:45:29,300 --> 00:45:30,533
IT'S 6 AM AND HE'S COOKING FOR

1339
00:45:30,600 --> 00:45:34,734
YOU.

1340
00:45:34,800 --> 00:45:36,000
NEW RULE: THE MEDIA MUST STOP

1341
00:45:36,066 --> 00:45:37,633
TRYING TO SCARE US WITH BULLSHIT

1342
00:45:37,700 --> 00:45:39,633
HORROR STORIES ABOUT MARIJUANA.

1343
00:45:39,700 --> 00:45:40,734
LIKE THIS ONE: "MAN DIES AFTER

1344
00:45:40,800 --> 00:45:45,533
POT PLANT LIQUEFIES HIS BRAIN."

1345
00:45:45,600 --> 00:45:46,633
NICE TRY, BUT WHERE I COME FROM,

1346
00:45:46,700 --> 00:45:47,667
"IT'LL LIQUEFY YOUR BRAIN", IS A

1347
00:45:47,734 --> 00:45:55,467
SELLING POINT.

1348
00:45:55,533 --> 00:45:56,600
P.S. THAT'S NOT EVEN A POT

1349
00:45:56,667 --> 00:46:02,700
PLANT, DOUCHEBAGS.

1350
00:46:02,767 --> 00:46:02,967
[LAUGHTER]

1351
00:46:03,033 --> 00:46:09,133
NEW RULE: THE ZOOM APP HAS TO

1352
00:46:09,200 --> 00:46:11,200
THIS POOR GUY, WE HIT UP IN THE

1353
00:46:11,266 --> 00:46:11,900
BEGINNING, WE HIT UP IN THE

1354
00:46:11,967 --> 00:46:15,533
MIDDLE AND WILL HIT THEM AT THE

1355
00:46:15,600 --> 00:46:18,700
END.

1356
00:46:18,767 --> 00:46:19,700
THE ZOOM APP HAS TO CHANGE ITS

1357
00:46:19,767 --> 00:46:20,567
NAME TO WE CAN SEE YOUR PENIS.

1358
00:46:20,633 --> 00:46:21,500
I REALIZE THAT'S A MOUTHFUL, BUT

1359
00:46:21,567 --> 00:46:22,300
APPARENTLY SOME PEOPLE NEED

1360
00:46:22,367 --> 00:46:23,500
REMINDING THAT IF THERE'S ONE

1361
00:46:23,567 --> 00:46:25,367
THING NOBODY LIKES SEEING ON

1362
00:46:25,433 --> 00:46:26,767
THEIR COMPUTER, IT'S UNWANTED

1363
00:46:26,834 --> 00:46:34,233
POP-UPS.

1364
00:46:34,300 --> 00:46:34,500
[LAUGHTER]

1365
00:46:34,567 --> 00:46:35,133
[APPLAUSE]

1366
00:46:35,200 --> 00:46:36,300
NEW RULE: SOMEONE MUST TELL

1367
00:46:36,367 --> 00:46:37,800
HARMONICA PLAYERS THAT THE

1368
00:46:37,867 --> 00:46:38,667
REASON THEY ALWAYS HAVE THE

1369
00:46:38,767 --> 00:46:40,000
BLUES - IS BECAUSE NOBODY WANTS

1370
00:46:40,066 --> 00:46:40,734
TO WATCH SOMEONE PLAY THE

1371
00:46:40,800 --> 00:46:45,233
HARMONICA.

1372
00:46:45,300 --> 00:46:46,300
BECAUSE IT SOUNDS LIKE YOU'RE

1373
00:46:46,367 --> 00:46:50,567
AUTO-TUNING AN ASTHMA ATTACK.

1374
00:46:50,633 --> 00:46:50,834
[LAUGHTER]

1375
00:46:50,900 --> 00:46:52,066
AND FINALLY, NEW RULE.

1376
00:46:52,133 --> 00:46:53,900
AN ELECTION IS MEANT TO

1377
00:46:53,967 --> 00:46:55,300
ELIMINATE CANDIDATES, NOT

1378
00:46:55,367 --> 00:46:57,033
VOTERS.

1379
00:46:57,100 --> 00:46:58,500
LAST WEEK IN GEORGIA, EARLY

1380
00:46:58,567 --> 00:46:59,767
VOTING IN THE WEALTHIER WHITE

1381
00:46:59,834 --> 00:47:01,066
NEIGHBORHOODS OF ATLANTA TOOK

1382
00:47:01,133 --> 00:47:02,000
JUST FIFTEEN MINUTES, BARELY

1383
00:47:02,066 --> 00:47:03,400
ENOUGH TIME FOR THE POODLE IN

1384
00:47:03,467 --> 00:47:05,066
THE CAR TO GET HOT.

1385
00:47:05,133 --> 00:47:06,600
BUT VOTERS IN SOME BLACK AREAS

1386
00:47:06,667 --> 00:47:07,600
STOOD IN LINE FOR UP TO EIGHT

1387
00:47:07,667 --> 00:47:09,200
HOURS.

1388
00:47:09,266 --> 00:47:10,900
IN TEXAS, THE GOVERNOR DECREED

1389
00:47:10,967 --> 00:47:13,000
THAT THERE BE ONLY ONE BALLOT

1390
00:47:13,100 --> 00:47:15,834
DROP BOX PER COUNTY.

1391
00:47:15,900 --> 00:47:17,633
WHICH IS FINE FOR LOVING COUNTY,

1392
00:47:17,700 --> 00:47:21,066
POPULATION 169 - BUT HARRIS

1393
00:47:21,133 --> 00:47:23,200
COUNTY, WHICH INCLUDES THE CITY

1394
00:47:23,266 --> 00:47:25,233
OF HOUSTON AND HAS 2.4 MILLION

1395
00:47:25,300 --> 00:47:26,700
ELIGIBLE VOTERS SPREAD ACROSS AN

1396
00:47:26,767 --> 00:47:28,600
AREA LARGER THAN RHODE ISLAND.

1397
00:47:28,667 --> 00:47:31,400
ALSO GOT ONE BOX.

1398
00:47:31,467 --> 00:47:32,667
IN SOME STATES, YOU HAVE TO PUT

1399
00:47:32,734 --> 00:47:34,133
YOUR MAIL-IN BALLOT INSIDE AN

1400
00:47:34,200 --> 00:47:36,533
ENVELOPE, AND THEN PUT THAT

1401
00:47:36,600 --> 00:47:37,934
ENVELOPE INTO A SECOND ENVELOPE,

1402
00:47:38,000 --> 00:47:38,700
AND THEN SIGN THE ENVELOPE.

1403
00:47:38,767 --> 00:47:39,734
IT'S LIKE YOU'RE DOING A MAGIC

1404
00:47:39,800 --> 00:47:42,400
TRICK.

1405
00:47:42,467 --> 00:47:43,700
FOR PEOPLE WHO SAY BOTH PARTIES

1406
00:47:43,767 --> 00:47:45,467
ARE BASICALLY THE SAME, VOTER

1407
00:47:45,533 --> 00:47:46,867
SUPPRESSION IS THE STARKEST

1408
00:47:46,934 --> 00:47:51,033
EXAMPLE OF HOW THAT'S NOT TRUE.

1409
00:47:51,100 --> 00:47:58,500
THIS IS 100% A REPUBLICAN THING.

1410
00:47:58,567 --> 00:48:00,633
[APPLAUSE]

1411
00:48:00,700 --> 00:48:02,767
THEY KNOW THEIR POLICIES AREN'T

1412
00:48:02,834 --> 00:48:03,967
AS POPULAR, SO THEY CAME UP WITH

1413
00:48:04,033 --> 00:48:05,166
AN EFFECTIVE, TIME-TESTED

1414
00:48:05,233 --> 00:48:06,633
POLITICAL TACTIC CALLED

1415
00:48:06,700 --> 00:48:09,734
"CHEATING."

1416
00:48:09,800 --> 00:48:10,000
[LAUGHTER]

1417
00:48:10,066 --> 00:48:10,934
I CAN'T MAKE YOU WANT TO VOTE

1418
00:48:11,000 --> 00:48:13,300
FOR ME, BUT MAYBE I CAN KEEP YOU

1419
00:48:13,367 --> 00:48:15,800
FROM VOTING FOR THE OTHER GUY.

1420
00:48:15,867 --> 00:48:16,633
THAT'S THEIR CREDO: "MAY THE

1421
00:48:16,700 --> 00:48:19,467
BEST MAN LOSE ANYWAY."

1422
00:48:19,533 --> 00:48:21,300
THE OTHER NIGHT I WAS WATCHING

1423
00:48:21,367 --> 00:48:23,300
ONE OF THOSE OBSTACLE COURSE

1424
00:48:23,367 --> 00:48:24,633
SHOWS - YOU KNOW, THE ONES WHERE

1425
00:48:24,700 --> 00:48:26,200
A CONTESTANT HAS TO GET ACROSS A

1426
00:48:26,266 --> 00:48:29,400
TERRAIN OF GIANT BOUNCY BALLS

1427
00:48:29,467 --> 00:48:31,767
AND SLIPPERY BALANCE BEAMS, AND

1428
00:48:31,834 --> 00:48:34,400
SWING ON ROPES LIKE TARZAN - AND

1429
00:48:34,467 --> 00:48:37,500
IT OCCURRED TO ME WHILE WATCHING

1430
00:48:37,567 --> 00:48:41,467
RICARDO LOSE HIS GRIP ON A FOAM

1431
00:48:41,533 --> 00:48:42,967
ROLLER, THAT THIS IS EXACTLY

1432
00:48:43,033 --> 00:48:44,633
WHAT OUR VOTING SYSTEM HAS

1433
00:48:44,700 --> 00:48:46,100
TURNED INTO: IT'S AMERICAN NINJA

1434
00:48:46,166 --> 00:48:52,400
WARRIOR: DEMOCRACY EDITION.

1435
00:48:52,467 --> 00:48:54,166
[APPLAUSE]

1436
00:48:54,233 --> 00:48:55,233
TRY TO MOVE FORWARD WITHOUT

1437
00:48:55,300 --> 00:48:56,100
GETTING KNOCKED OFF THE VOTER

1438
00:48:56,166 --> 00:48:58,266
ROLLS!

1439
00:48:58,333 --> 00:48:59,467
MATCH YOUR WITS AND PHYSICAL

1440
00:48:59,533 --> 00:49:01,367
PROWESS IN OUR MOST CHALLENGING

1441
00:49:01,433 --> 00:49:04,066
STEEPLECHASES LIKE: THE

1442
00:49:04,133 --> 00:49:05,400
ELIMINATOR WHERE YOU SHOW UP TO

1443
00:49:05,467 --> 00:49:06,767
VOTE, ONLY TO FIND YOUR POLLING

1444
00:49:06,834 --> 00:49:12,166
PLACE HAS BEEN CLOSED.

1445
00:49:12,233 --> 00:49:13,367
SPLISH SPLASH, YOU'RE TAKIN' A

1446
00:49:13,433 --> 00:49:15,600
BATH.

1447
00:49:15,667 --> 00:49:16,700
THE EXCRUCIATOR.

1448
00:49:16,767 --> 00:49:17,834
WHERE YOU FINALLY FIND YOUR

1449
00:49:17,900 --> 00:49:19,600
POLLING PLACE BUT THE LINE IS

1450
00:49:19,667 --> 00:49:20,900
HOURS LONG BECAUSE THEY'VE SHUT

1451
00:49:20,967 --> 00:49:22,166
DOWN ALL THE OTHER POLLING

1452
00:49:22,233 --> 00:49:23,700
PLACES AND YOUR PRECINCT HAS

1453
00:49:23,767 --> 00:49:25,000
BEEN GIVEN THE OLD, BROKEN

1454
00:49:25,066 --> 00:49:28,266
VOTING MACHINES.

1455
00:49:28,333 --> 00:49:32,133
KER-PLUNK!

1456
00:49:32,200 --> 00:49:37,600
>> OHNO!

1457
00:49:37,667 --> 00:49:37,834
>> Bill:

1458
00:49:37,900 --> 00:49:38,767
THE MIS-IDENTIFIER WHERE YOU

1459
00:49:38,834 --> 00:49:39,734
FINALLY GET TO THE FRONT OF THAT

1460
00:49:39,800 --> 00:49:40,867
LINE THAT YOU'VE BEEN WAITING IN

1461
00:49:40,934 --> 00:49:42,133
FOR HOURS AND THEY TELL YOU THAT

1462
00:49:42,200 --> 00:49:45,200
YOU HAVE THE WRONG ID.

1463
00:49:45,266 --> 00:49:48,100
HOPE YOU CAN SWIM!

1464
00:49:48,166 --> 00:49:49,500
THE MONKEYWRENCH.

1465
00:49:49,567 --> 00:49:51,233
WHERE YOU SAY "OKAY FINE, I'LL

1466
00:49:51,300 --> 00:49:52,633
MAIL IN MY BALLOT," ONLY TO FIND

1467
00:49:52,700 --> 00:49:54,800
THEY REMOVED THE ONLY MAILBOX IN

1468
00:49:54,867 --> 00:49:57,133
THE NEIGHBORHOOD.

1469
00:49:57,200 --> 00:49:59,633
OH NO!

1470
00:49:59,700 --> 00:50:01,233
AND FINALLY, BRAND NEW THIS

1471
00:50:01,300 --> 00:50:02,633
YEAR, TRY TO STAY DRY WHEN GOING

1472
00:50:02,700 --> 00:50:05,834
UP AGAINST THE OBSTRUCTOR.

1473
00:50:05,900 --> 00:50:07,367
WHERE YOU SAY, "FUCK IT, I'LL

1474
00:50:07,433 --> 00:50:08,734
JUST DROP OFF MY MAIL-IN BALLOT

1475
00:50:08,800 --> 00:50:11,200
AT A DESIGNATED DROP-OFF BOX,"

1476
00:50:11,266 --> 00:50:13,266
ONLY TO FIND THERE'S ONLY ONE

1477
00:50:13,333 --> 00:50:16,867
FOR 2.4 MILLION PEOPLE!

1478
00:50:16,934 --> 00:50:20,867
WAH WAH.

1479
00:50:20,934 --> 00:50:21,967
IT'S AMAZING HOW BRAZEN

1480
00:50:22,033 --> 00:50:23,100
REPUBLICANS HAVE BECOME IN

1481
00:50:23,166 --> 00:50:24,667
OWNING VOTER SUPPRESSION.

1482
00:50:24,734 --> 00:50:25,834
BACK IN MARCH WHEN DEMOCRATS

1483
00:50:25,900 --> 00:50:27,800
WERE PUSHING FOR VOTE-BY MAIL,

1484
00:50:27,867 --> 00:50:30,800
SAME-DAY REGISTRATION AND EARLY

1485
00:50:30,867 --> 00:50:32,400
VOTING TRUMP - BECAUSE HE'S A

1486
00:50:32,467 --> 00:50:35,000
POKER PLAYER WHO ALWAYS TELLS

1487
00:50:35,066 --> 00:50:36,166
YOU HIS HAND - SAID THIS WOULD

1488
00:50:36,233 --> 00:50:38,967
RESULT IN "LEVELS OF VOTING THAT

1489
00:50:39,033 --> 00:50:40,633
IF YOU'D EVER AGREED TO IT,

1490
00:50:40,700 --> 00:50:42,000
YOU'D NEVER HAVE A REPUBLICAN

1491
00:50:42,066 --> 00:50:45,400
ELECTED IN THIS COUNTRY AGAIN."

1492
00:50:45,467 --> 00:50:47,100
NOT QUITE, BUT YES, MORE PEOPLE

1493
00:50:47,166 --> 00:50:50,200
VOTE FOR DEMOCRATS.

1494
00:50:50,266 --> 00:50:56,533
A PROCESS KNOWN AS "COUNTING."

1495
00:50:56,600 --> 00:51:02,867
[LAUGHTER]

1496
00:51:02,967 --> 00:51:05,700
DAVID LEWIS IS A STATE REP FROM

1497
00:51:05,767 --> 00:51:07,800
NORTH CAROLINA, HE WAS TASKED

1498
00:51:07,867 --> 00:51:11,000
WITH REDISTRICTING

1499
00:51:11,066 --> 00:51:11,767
AND HE GAVE ONE OF THE MOST

1500
00:51:11,834 --> 00:51:13,066
HONEST RATIONALES FOR PARTISAN

1501
00:51:13,133 --> 00:51:13,700
GERRYMANDERING YOU'LL EVER HEAR.

1502
00:51:13,767 --> 00:51:14,734
HE SAID "I THINK ELECTING

1503
00:51:14,800 --> 00:51:15,700
REPUBLICANS IS BETTER THAN

1504
00:51:15,767 --> 00:51:16,467
ELECTING DEMOCRATS.

1505
00:51:16,533 --> 00:51:17,767
SO I DREW THIS MAP IN A WAY TO

1506
00:51:17,834 --> 00:51:18,633
HELP."

1507
00:51:18,700 --> 00:51:20,133
IT MUST HAVE BEEN SUCH A RELIEF

1508
00:51:20,200 --> 00:51:21,567
FOR THESE CHEATERS TO STOP

1509
00:51:21,633 --> 00:51:22,567
PRETENDING THERE WAS A GOOD

1510
00:51:22,633 --> 00:51:23,633
REASON FOR THEIR CHEATING AND

1511
00:51:23,700 --> 00:51:24,734
JUST SAY IT.

1512
00:51:24,800 --> 00:51:25,800
LIKE WHEN MOM FINALLY ADMITS THE

1513
00:51:25,867 --> 00:51:26,900
HITACHI MAGIC WAND ISN'T FOR HER

1514
00:51:26,967 --> 00:51:32,500
BACK.

1515
00:51:32,567 --> 00:51:36,300
WELL HERE'S MY MESSAGE TO THE

1516
00:51:36,367 --> 00:51:38,033
CHEATERS: I'VE ALWAYS PREACHED

1517
00:51:38,100 --> 00:51:39,333
ON THIS SHOW THAT YOU CAN HATE

1518
00:51:39,400 --> 00:51:40,567
TRUMP, BUT YOU CAN'T HATE HIS

1519
00:51:40,633 --> 00:51:42,800
SUPPORTERS.

1520
00:51:42,867 --> 00:51:44,700
I MEANT IT THEN, AND I MEAN IT

1521
00:51:44,767 --> 00:51:46,133
NOW.

1522
00:51:46,200 --> 00:51:47,033
BUT THAT GOES OUT THE WINDOW IF

1523
00:51:47,100 --> 00:51:48,633
YOU STEAL FROM ME.

1524
00:51:48,700 --> 00:51:49,900
MY VOTE IS A THING OF VALUE -

1525
00:51:49,967 --> 00:51:50,934
YOU STEAL IT?

1526
00:51:51,000 --> 00:51:57,266
I DO HATE YOU, BECAUSE THAT'S

1527
00:51:57,333 --> 00:51:58,033
NOT "WE SEE THE WORLD

1528
00:51:58,100 --> 00:51:58,333
[APPLAUSE]

1529
00:51:58,400 --> 00:51:59,266
DIFFERENTLY, AND OUR POLITICS

1530
00:51:59,333 --> 00:52:00,333
ARE DIFFERENT," THAT'S "YOU'RE A

1531
00:52:00,400 --> 00:52:02,767
CROOK, A THIEF AND A SCHMUCK."

1532
00:52:02,834 --> 00:52:04,667
ELECTIONS ARE SUPPOSED TO BE

1533
00:52:04,734 --> 00:52:07,834
FREE AND FAIR, NOT WET AND WILD.

1534
00:52:07,900 --> 00:52:09,300
AND IF YOU WAIT EIGHT HOURS TO

1535
00:52:09,367 --> 00:52:10,400
VOTE, WHEN YOU GET OUT OF THE

1536
00:52:10,467 --> 00:52:17,133
BOOTH YOU DESERVE TO DO THIS:

1537
00:52:17,200 --> 00:52:18,166
OKAY, THAT'S OUR SHOW.

1538
00:52:18,233 --> 00:52:19,233
I WANT TO THANK MY GUESTS

1539
00:52:19,300 --> 00:52:19,967
ANTHONY SCARAMUCCI, HEIDI

1540
00:52:20,033 --> 00:52:21,667
HEITKAMP, MATTHEW McCONAUGHEY

1541
00:52:21,734 --> 00:52:22,533
AND BEN SHEEHAN.

1542
00:52:22,600 --> 00:52:23,834
WE'LL BE BACK NEXT WEEK.

1543
00:52:23,900 --> 00:52:31,667
GOODNIGHT!

1544
00:52:31,767 --> 00:52:41,233
THANK YOU VERY MUCH!

1545
00:52:41,300 --> 00:52:41,700
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

1546
00:52:41,767 --> 00:52:57,867
♪ ♪

1547
00:52:57,934 --> 00:52:58,934
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

1548
00:53:06,166 --> 00:53:07,400
♪ ("WILLIAM TELL OVERTURE"
BY GIOACHINO ROSSINI PLAYS) ♪

1549
00:53:07,467 --> 00:53:10,066
The 2000 election
was a street brawl

1550
00:53:10,133 --> 00:53:12,367
for the presidency
of the United States.

1551
00:53:13,100 --> 00:53:16,767
What happened in Miami
changed this country, forever.

1552
00:53:16,834 --> 00:53:19,233
While Democrats wanted
to do the right thing,

1553
00:53:20,667 --> 00:53:22,734
Republicans wanted to win.

1554
00:53:23,033 --> 00:53:26,300
MAN: The election was lost
in many different places.

1555
00:53:26,367 --> 00:53:28,333
But it was stolen in Miami.