1 00:00:00,033 --> 00:00:03,737 >> Dicky: FROM HOLLYWOOD, IT'S "JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE!" 2 00:00:03,737 --> 00:00:07,241 TONIGHT, EMMA STONE, RORY SCOVEL, AND MUSIC FROM 3 00:00:07,241 --> 00:00:12,424 CHLOE MORIONDO. AND NOW, JIMMY KIMMEL! 4 00:00:12,424 --> 00:00:13,091 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 5 00:00:13,091 --> 00:00:14,760 >> Jimmy: WOW, THANK YOU. HI, EVERYONE. 6 00:00:14,760 --> 00:00:17,014 I'M JIMMY, I'M THE HOST OF THE SHOW. THANK YOU FOR WATCHING. 7 00:00:17,014 --> 00:00:22,486 THANK YOU FOR JOINING US ON 8 00:00:22,486 --> 00:00:25,856 A BIG NIGHT, IT'S "FRIENDS" REUNION NIGHT IN AMERICA. 9 00:00:25,856 --> 00:00:26,356 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 10 00:00:26,356 --> 00:00:27,491 THAT'S RIGHT. THEY MIGHT NOT BE THERE FOR YOU 11 00:00:27,491 --> 00:00:30,093 ANYMORE, BUT WE ARE. RIGHT, GUILLERMO? 12 00:00:30,093 --> 00:00:30,861 >> Guillermo: THAT'S RIGHT, JIMMY. 13 00:00:30,861 --> 00:00:31,194 [ APPLAUSE ] 14 00:00:31,194 --> 00:00:34,097 >> Jimmy: THAT'S RIGHT. WE ARE COMING TO YOU FROM 15 00:00:34,097 --> 00:00:36,099 STUDIO 4H IN HOLLYWOOD. YOU KNOW, WE HAVEN'T HAD A 16 00:00:36,099 --> 00:00:38,869 STUDIO AUDIENCE IN WELL OVER A YEAR. 17 00:00:38,869 --> 00:00:42,339 AT FIRST, I DID THE SHOW FOR NO ONE AT HOME. WHICH WAS SAD. 18 00:00:42,339 --> 00:00:44,107 AND NOW, I'VE BEEN DOING A SHOW FOR OUR STAFF. 19 00:00:44,107 --> 00:00:45,575 WHICH IS SOMEHOW EVEN SADDER. 20 00:00:45,575 --> 00:00:47,911 [ LAUGHTER ] 21 00:00:47,911 --> 00:00:53,350 SO TO LIVEN THINGS UP, WE'VE BEEN INVITING ONE OR TWO 22 00:00:53,350 --> 00:00:56,153 VACCINATED PEOPLE PER WEEK TO SIT IN OUR AUDIENCE. 23 00:00:56,153 --> 00:00:59,423 TONIGHT WE ARE JOINED BY ‐‐ WHAT IS YOUR NAME, SIR? 24 00:00:59,423 --> 00:01:01,458 >> MY NAME IS GAVIN. 25 00:01:01,458 --> 00:01:01,958 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 26 00:01:01,958 --> 00:01:04,594 >> Jimmy: GAVIN, HOW ARE YOU? THANKS FOR BEING WITH US. 27 00:01:04,594 --> 00:01:05,462 >> GREAT TO BE HERE. 28 00:01:05,462 --> 00:01:07,330 >> Jimmy: WHAT DO YOU DO FOR A LIVING? 29 00:01:07,330 --> 00:01:11,034 >> I HATE TO ADMIT THIS. IN POLITICS, JIMMY. 30 00:01:11,034 --> 00:01:12,335 >> Jimmy: YOU'RE IN POLITICS. 31 00:01:12,335 --> 00:01:12,669 [ LAUGHTER ] 32 00:01:12,669 --> 00:01:14,271 WHAT DO YOU DO IN POLITICS? 33 00:01:14,271 --> 00:01:17,107 >> I'M A GOVERNOR, I'M A GOVERNOR. 34 00:01:17,107 --> 00:01:17,440 [ LAUGHTER ] 35 00:01:17,440 --> 00:01:18,842 EVERY STATE'S GOT ONE, JIMMY. 36 00:01:18,842 --> 00:01:19,776 >> Jimmy: OF A STATE? 37 00:01:19,776 --> 00:01:21,278 >> OF A STATE, IMAGINE THAT. 38 00:01:21,278 --> 00:01:22,512 >> Jimmy: OH, OF CALIFORNIA? 39 00:01:22,512 --> 00:01:24,147 >> OF CALIFORIA. 40 00:01:24,147 --> 00:01:24,581 >> Jimmy: OH. 41 00:01:24,581 --> 00:01:25,248 >> YEAH. 42 00:01:25,248 --> 00:01:26,683 >> Jimmy: THAT'S AN INTERESTING JOB, THAT IS FUN? 43 00:01:26,683 --> 00:01:27,016 [ LAUGHTER ] 44 00:01:27,016 --> 00:01:30,687 >> YEAH, I MEAN ‐‐ YOU'RE ASKING ME IF BEING GOVERNOR OF 45 00:01:30,687 --> 00:01:31,922 CALIFORNIA IS FUN? 46 00:01:31,922 --> 00:01:32,956 >> Jimmy: YEAH. 47 00:01:32,956 --> 00:01:36,126 >> THIS LAST YEAR, IT'S BEEN A HELL OF A LOT OF FUN. 48 00:01:36,126 --> 00:01:36,459 [ LAUGHTER ] 49 00:01:36,459 --> 00:01:39,162 >> Jimmy: YEAH, IT'S BEEN GREAT. 50 00:01:39,162 --> 00:01:39,496 [ APPLAUSE ] 51 00:01:39,496 --> 00:01:39,829 >> YEAH. 52 00:01:39,829 --> 00:01:43,667 >> Jimmy: SO YOU MIGHT KNOW SOMETHING ABOUT THIS NEW LOTTERY 53 00:01:43,667 --> 00:01:44,000 PLANNED. 54 00:01:44,000 --> 00:01:44,333 >> YES, SIR. 55 00:01:44,333 --> 00:01:46,269 >> Jimmy: FOR PEOPLE WHO GET VACCINATED HERE IN CALIFORNIA. 56 00:01:46,269 --> 00:01:49,439 HOW DOES THAT WORK, EXACTLY? AND KEEP IN MIND, WE CAN'T 57 00:01:49,439 --> 00:01:50,307 UNDERSTAND A SINGLE WORD YOU'RE SAYING. 58 00:01:50,307 --> 00:01:52,776 [ LAUGHTER ] 59 00:01:52,776 --> 00:01:56,046 >> JUNE 15th, THESE DAMN THINGS ARE TAKEN OFF. 60 00:01:56,046 --> 00:01:56,513 >> Jimmy: JUNE 15th? 61 00:01:56,513 --> 00:01:58,315 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 62 00:01:58,315 --> 00:02:00,150 CAN WE GET AN AUDIENCE ON JUNE 15th? 63 00:02:00,150 --> 00:02:00,751 >> YEAH. 64 00:02:00,751 --> 00:02:03,286 >> Jimmy: YOU HEARD IT, THE GOVERNOR SAID. 65 00:02:03,286 --> 00:02:04,187 >> THAT'S IT. 66 00:02:04,187 --> 00:02:07,190 >> Jimmy: SO WHAT, PEOPLE WILL GET ENTERED IN THE LOTTERY IF 67 00:02:07,190 --> 00:02:07,691 THEY ‐‐ 68 00:02:07,691 --> 00:02:08,413 >> EVERYBODY THAT'S GOTTEN VACCINATED IN CALIFORNIA IS 69 00:02:08,413 --> 00:02:12,317 AUTOMATICALLY ELIGIBLE. WE'VE PUT $116 MILLION UP. 70 00:02:12,317 --> 00:02:17,089 ON JUNE 15th, WE'RE GOING TO DO A $15 MILLION RAFFLE, A SERIES 71 00:02:17,089 --> 00:02:23,595 OF RAFFLES, $50,000 ON FRIDAY, JUNE 4th, FRIDAY, JUNE 11th, $50 72 00:02:23,595 --> 00:02:25,831 GIFT CARDS, UNPRECEDENTED. 73 00:02:25,831 --> 00:02:27,966 >> Jimmy: ONLY FOR PEOPLE WHO HAVE BEEN VACCINATED? 74 00:02:27,966 --> 00:02:30,869 >> BEEN VACCINATED AND ENCOURAGING NEW PEOPLE TO GET 75 00:02:30,869 --> 00:02:31,202 VACCINATED. 76 00:02:31,202 --> 00:02:34,706 >> Jimmy: WHAT IF YOU WERE VACCINATED, YOU'RE ONE OF THE 77 00:02:34,706 --> 00:02:37,910 SMART ONES WHO GOT VACCINATED, DO YOU STILL GET IN THE RAFFLE? 78 00:02:37,910 --> 00:02:40,746 >> IN SOME OF THE STATES THEY'RE DOING RAFFLES BUT THEY DON'T 79 00:02:40,746 --> 00:02:43,115 INCLUDE SPOKES THAT DID THE RIGHT THING EARLY. 80 00:02:43,115 --> 00:02:45,284 >> Jimmy: RIGHT. 81 00:02:45,284 --> 00:02:48,287 >> WE'RE INCLUDING EVERYBODY THAT DID IT. 82 00:02:48,287 --> 00:02:48,787 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 83 00:02:48,787 --> 00:02:52,190 >> Jimmy: EXACTLY. WHAT IF YOU GOT VACCINATED UNDER 84 00:02:52,190 --> 00:02:53,759 THE NAME "CARLOS DANGER"? 85 00:02:53,759 --> 00:02:54,092 [ LAUGHTER ] 86 00:02:54,092 --> 00:03:00,332 WOULD YOU STILL BE ‐‐ I MEAN, WOULD ONE STILL BE ELIGIBLE? 87 00:03:00,332 --> 00:03:02,534 >> JIMMY, I HAVE NO IDEA WHY YOU'RE ASKING THAT QUESTION. 88 00:03:02,534 --> 00:03:06,571 [ LAUGHTER ] 89 00:03:06,571 --> 00:03:07,806 FASCINATING, REALLY FASCINATING. 90 00:03:07,806 --> 00:03:08,407 >> Jimmy: ARE YOU ELIGIBLE? 91 00:03:08,407 --> 00:03:09,007 >> I AM NOT. 92 00:03:09,007 --> 00:03:10,475 >> Jimmy: FOR THE LOTTERY? 93 00:03:10,475 --> 00:03:12,945 >> FOR THE RECORD, NO, BUT YOU ARE, COUPLE ME. 94 00:03:12,945 --> 00:03:13,445 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 95 00:03:13,445 --> 00:03:15,213 >> Jimmy: GREAT, I'D LIKE TO WIN THAT. 96 00:03:15,213 --> 00:03:19,751 >> I MEAN, YOU NEED THE MONEY, KIM KIMMEL, OKAY? 97 00:03:19,751 --> 00:03:21,486 >> Jimmy: HOW MAD WOULD EVERYBODY BE IF I WON? 98 00:03:21,486 --> 00:03:24,790 HEY, ARE YOU GOING TO DO A DRAW THE BALL TYPE OF THING ON TV? 99 00:03:24,790 --> 00:03:28,126 >> WHATEVER, IF YOU'VE GOT CREATIVE IDEAS, I'LL ALL EARS. 100 00:03:28,126 --> 00:03:30,996 >> Jimmy: I THINK WE'VE GOT A GUY WHO COULD BE REALLY GOOD AT 101 00:03:30,996 --> 00:03:31,596 DRAWING BALLS. 102 00:03:31,596 --> 00:03:31,930 [ LAUGHTER ] 103 00:03:31,930 --> 00:03:33,065 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 104 00:03:33,065 --> 00:03:36,368 >> UNBELIEVABLE. 105 00:03:36,368 --> 00:03:39,404 >> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT, SO YOU'RE NOT JUST THE GOVERNOR TONIGHT, 106 00:03:39,404 --> 00:03:40,272 YOU'RE THE STUDIO AUDIENCE. 107 00:03:40,272 --> 00:03:40,739 >> I AM, I AM. 108 00:03:40,739 --> 00:03:42,741 >> Jimmy: IT'S A LOT OF RESPONSIBILITY. 109 00:03:42,741 --> 00:03:43,241 >> I AM THE ONE. 110 00:03:43,241 --> 00:03:46,478 >> Jimmy: I KNOW YOU'RE USED TO RESPONSIBILITY, BUT THIS IS MORE. 111 00:03:46,478 --> 00:03:49,614 FOR ME PERSONALLY, THIS IS MORE. ALSO NO BATHROOM BREAKS, IT 112 00:03:49,614 --> 00:03:51,383 DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOU DO, OKAY? 113 00:03:51,383 --> 00:03:51,783 [ LAUGHTER ] 114 00:03:51,783 --> 00:03:53,085 GOVERNOR NEWSOM IS OUR STUDIO AUDIENCE TONIGHT. 115 00:03:53,085 --> 00:03:58,090 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 116 00:03:58,090 --> 00:04:05,664 YOU KNOW, THE HOLIDAY WEEKEND IS ALMOST UPON US. 117 00:04:05,664 --> 00:04:06,965 THINGS ARE LOOSENING UP. I AM READY FOR THIS WEEKEND. 118 00:04:06,965 --> 00:04:08,200 I AM VAXXED AND BIKINI WAXED. FORMER PRESIDENT EL CRAPPO 119 00:04:08,200 --> 00:04:09,668 POSTED A MEMORIAL DAY MESSAGE ON HIS WEBSITE TODAY. 120 00:04:09,668 --> 00:04:10,902 HE WROTE, "WITH MEMORIAL DAY WEEKEND COMING UP, TOMORROW, 121 00:04:10,902 --> 00:04:12,537 PEOPLE START DRIVING IN THE BIGGEST AUTOMOBILE DAYS OF THE 122 00:04:12,537 --> 00:04:16,174 YEAR." I'M SORRY TO SAY THE GASOLINE 123 00:04:16,174 --> 00:04:17,642 PRICES THAT YOU WILL BE CONFRONTED WITH ARE FAR HIGHER 124 00:04:17,642 --> 00:04:24,383 THAN THEY WERE JUST A SHORT NUMBER OF MONTHS AGO WHERE WE 125 00:04:24,383 --> 00:04:26,118 HAD GASOLINE UNDER $2 A GALLON. REMEMBER, AS YOU'RE WATCHING THE 126 00:04:26,118 --> 00:04:28,387 METER TICK, AND YOUR DOLLARS PILE UP, HOW GREAT OF A JOB 127 00:04:28,387 --> 00:04:29,087 DONALD TRUMP DID AS PRESIDENT. 128 00:04:29,087 --> 00:04:30,889 [ LAUGHTER ] 129 00:04:30,889 --> 00:04:33,625 SOON, RUSSIA AND THE MIDDLE EAST WILL BE MAKING A FORTUNE ON OIL, 130 00:04:33,625 --> 00:04:35,127 AND YOU WILL BE SAYING HOW GOOD IT WAS TO HAVE ME AS YOUR 131 00:04:35,127 --> 00:04:36,128 PRESIDENT. 132 00:04:36,128 --> 00:04:37,629 [ LAUGHTER ] 133 00:04:37,629 --> 00:04:39,131 WASN'T IT GREAT TO BE ENERGY INDEPENDENT, BUT WE ARE ENERGY 134 00:04:39,131 --> 00:04:42,367 INDEPENDENT NO MORE. SHAME, SHAME, SHAME. 135 00:04:42,367 --> 00:04:45,604 OTHER THAN THAT, HAVE A GREAT MEMORIAL DAY WEEKEND!" 136 00:04:45,604 --> 00:04:45,937 [ LAUGHTER ] 137 00:04:45,937 --> 00:04:49,107 [ APPLAUSE ] 138 00:04:49,107 --> 00:04:53,945 HE'S JUST A CRAZY OLD MAN SHOUTING AT PIGEONS NOW. 139 00:04:53,945 --> 00:04:54,279 [ LAUGHTER ] 140 00:04:54,279 --> 00:04:55,680 HE SEEMS TO FORGET THE REASON GAS PRICES WERE LOW WAS BECAUSE 141 00:04:55,680 --> 00:04:58,784 WE HAD NO PLACE TO GO! WE HAD NOWHERE TO DRIVE. 142 00:04:58,784 --> 00:05:01,520 THERE WAS A TERRIBLE VIRUS KILLING OUR GRANDPARENTS. 143 00:05:01,520 --> 00:05:03,021 WHEN I WAS PRESIDENT, WE SPENT MONEY ON PORN STARS, NOT 144 00:05:03,021 --> 00:05:03,989 GASOLINE! 145 00:05:03,989 --> 00:05:05,791 [ LAUGHTER ] 146 00:05:05,791 --> 00:05:07,292 [ APPLAUSE ] 147 00:05:07,292 --> 00:05:08,627 34 MILLION AMERICANS ARE EXPECTED TO HIT THE ROAD THIS 148 00:05:08,627 --> 00:05:12,064 WEEKEND. ANOTHER 2.5 MILLION HAVE PLANS 149 00:05:12,064 --> 00:05:16,535 TO FLY, WHICH IS WAY UP FROM THE SAME TIME LAST YEAR. 150 00:05:16,535 --> 00:05:18,537 THE TSA SAYS EXPECT LONG LINES AT THE AIRPORT. 151 00:05:18,537 --> 00:05:22,174 I'M EVEN EXCITED TO SEE THE TSA. I'M EVEN EXCITED TO GO ‐‐ 152 00:05:22,174 --> 00:05:23,675 WHEN THAT WAND TOUCHES MY INNER THIGH? 153 00:05:23,675 --> 00:05:25,143 I'M GONNA LOOK THE AGENT RIGHT IN THE EYES AND SAY "I MISSED 154 00:05:25,143 --> 00:05:26,011 YOU TOO, BIG GUY." 155 00:05:26,011 --> 00:05:27,045 [ LAUGHTER ] 156 00:05:27,045 --> 00:05:29,281 I REALLY DID. LAST NIGHT IN NEW YORK, THE 157 00:05:29,281 --> 00:05:32,984 KNICKS WON THEIR FIRST PLAYOFF GAME SINCE 2013. 158 00:05:32,984 --> 00:05:37,689 THIS WAS THE SCENE OUTSIDE MADISON SQUARE GARDEN. 159 00:05:37,689 --> 00:05:39,524 KEEP IN MIND, THEY WON ONE GAME. 160 00:05:39,524 --> 00:05:41,493 [ LAUGHTER ] 161 00:05:41,493 --> 00:05:43,995 THAT MIGHT BE THE SADDEST HAPPINESS I'VE EVER SEEN. 162 00:05:43,995 --> 00:05:48,200 THE FIRST ROUND OF THE NBA PLAYOFFS IS UNDER WAY. 163 00:05:48,200 --> 00:05:50,268 LAST NIGHT IN PHILADELPHIA, RUSSELL WESTBROOK OF THE 164 00:05:50,268 --> 00:05:55,774 WASHINGTON WIZARDS WAS HEADED TO THE LOCKER ROOM, GOT AN INJURY. 165 00:05:55,774 --> 00:06:00,512 SOME SIXERS FAN DUMPED A BAG OF POPCORN ON HIS HEAD, AND HE WAS 166 00:06:00,512 --> 00:06:02,681 NOT HAPPY ABOUT THAT. IT FELT LIKE A MAFIA MOVIE AND 167 00:06:02,681 --> 00:06:04,483 WESTBROOK WAS BEING SENT A MESSAGE BY ONE OF ORVILLE 168 00:06:04,483 --> 00:06:05,183 REDENBACHER'S GOONS. 169 00:06:05,183 --> 00:06:09,087 [ LAUGHTER ] 170 00:06:09,087 --> 00:06:11,690 PLAYERS INCLUDING LeBRON JAMES ARE CALLING FOR MORE PROTECTION. 171 00:06:11,690 --> 00:06:14,392 BUT THAT'S PHILADELPHIA. I MEAN, THAT'S WHAT ‐‐ THEY 172 00:06:14,392 --> 00:06:16,995 FINALLY GET TO GO TO GAMES AGAIN, IMMEDIATELY THEY'RE 173 00:06:16,995 --> 00:06:18,029 DUMPING SNACKS ON OPPOSING PLAYERS' HEADS. 174 00:06:18,029 --> 00:06:21,266 [ LAUGHTER ] 175 00:06:21,266 --> 00:06:24,402 IN GEORGIA, THE GOVERNOR OF GEORGIA, BRIAN KEMP, WAS ON FOX 176 00:06:24,402 --> 00:06:27,706 NEWS GETTING STROKED BY LAWRENCE JONES FOR DECIDING NOT TO TAKE A 177 00:06:27,706 --> 00:06:29,407 HARD STANCE IN SUPPORT OF VACCINES. 178 00:06:29,407 --> 00:06:30,909 AND AT THE END OF THEIR CHAT, KEMP MADE A STATEMENT ABOUT 179 00:06:30,909 --> 00:06:32,410 FREEDOM THAT WAS SO ELOQUENT, I IMMEDIATELY STARTED EMBROIDERING 180 00:06:32,410 --> 00:06:34,746 IT ON A PILLOW. 181 00:06:34,746 --> 00:06:37,616 >> THEY WANT TO TAKE THE VACCINE, IT IS AVAILABLE TO THEM. 182 00:06:37,616 --> 00:06:41,453 IF THEY DECIDE NOT TO, THE STATE SHOULD NOT PUNISH THEM. 183 00:06:41,453 --> 00:06:44,723 I THANK YOU FOR YOUR LEADERSHIP ON THIS ISSUE, GOVERNOR. 184 00:06:44,723 --> 00:06:48,059 >> THANKS, LAWRENCE. IT IS AMERICA, THE LAND OF 185 00:06:48,059 --> 00:06:52,998 THE ‐‐ HOME AND THE ‐‐ FREEDOM REIGNS. 186 00:06:52,998 --> 00:06:53,331 [ LAUGHTER ] 187 00:06:53,331 --> 00:06:53,664 [ APPLAUSE ] 188 00:06:53,664 --> 00:06:55,300 >> Jimmy: BEAUTIFULLY PUT. I'M ALMOST IN TEARS. 189 00:06:55,300 --> 00:06:58,036 GOVERNOR NEWSOM, YOU KNOW GOVERNOR KEMP FROM GOVERNOR CLUB? 190 00:06:58,036 --> 00:07:02,541 [ LAUGHTER ] 191 00:07:02,541 --> 00:07:04,843 >> I GOT TO UNPACK THAT, I'M GLAD I'M WEARING A MASK. 192 00:07:04,843 --> 00:07:07,679 [ LAUGHTER ] 193 00:07:07,679 --> 00:07:12,417 >> Jimmy: IF YOU SEE HIM, PLEASE TELL HIM HOW MOVED WE ALL WERE 194 00:07:12,417 --> 00:07:13,318 BY HIS SPEECH. 195 00:07:13,318 --> 00:07:16,354 >> GOD BLESS. I'M GLAD WE SAW IT, YOU SHOULD 196 00:07:16,354 --> 00:07:17,222 REPLAY IT. 197 00:07:17,222 --> 00:07:17,555 [ LAUGHTER ] 198 00:07:17,555 --> 00:07:21,326 >> Jimmy: SPEAKING OF GOVERNORS. MYPILLOW MAN, MIKE LINDELL, IS 199 00:07:21,326 --> 00:07:23,028 RUMORED TO BE PLANNING A RUN IN MINNESOTA. 200 00:07:23,028 --> 00:07:26,331 BUT HE HAS NOT RECEIVED A WARM WELCOME FROM FELLOW REPUBLICAN 201 00:07:26,331 --> 00:07:29,301 GOVERNORS. HE SAYS HE WAS TURNED AWAY 202 00:07:29,301 --> 00:07:31,036 FROM THE ANNUAL MEETING OF THE REPUBLICAN GOVERNORS ASSOCIATION. 203 00:07:31,036 --> 00:07:33,305 APPARENTLY, HE FLEW TO NASHVILLE SPECIFICALLY FOR THE EVENT, BUT 204 00:07:33,305 --> 00:07:35,774 WHEN HE GOT TO THE HOTEL TO PICK UP HIS CREDENTIAL, HE SAYS THEY 205 00:07:35,774 --> 00:07:38,276 TURNED HIM AWAY. HE SAYS AN EVENT COORDINATOR 206 00:07:38,276 --> 00:07:43,248 TOLD HIM HE WOULD NOT BE ALLOWED AT ANY OF THE OFFICIAL EVENTS. 207 00:07:43,248 --> 00:07:46,017 >> YOU ACTED LIKE I WASN'T INVITED TO THAT. 208 00:07:46,017 --> 00:07:49,754 THAT'S THE ONLY REASON I CAME TO NASHVILLE. 209 00:07:49,754 --> 00:07:51,590 AND I HAVE THE PASS TO PROVE IT. YOU KNOW WHAT? 210 00:07:51,590 --> 00:07:55,627 HE CALLED HIM UP AND HE DID A RETRACT ‐‐ HE ADDED ON TO HIS 211 00:07:55,627 --> 00:07:58,597 STORY, HE SAID, MIKE HAS THE CREDENTIALS, HE HAS THE INVITE 212 00:07:58,597 --> 00:08:01,766 TO THE GOVERNOR'S MANSION, AND GUESS WHAT, HE CALLED HIM UP, 213 00:08:01,766 --> 00:08:03,501 AND YOU KNOW WHAT THEY TOLD HIM, STEVE? 214 00:08:03,501 --> 00:08:04,236 THEY TOLD HIM I WASN'T INVITED. 215 00:08:04,236 --> 00:08:08,173 >> Jimmy: WELL. OBVIOUSLY I NEED TO KNOW MORE 216 00:08:08,173 --> 00:08:10,275 ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED THERE. SO WE REACHED OUT TO MIKE, AND 217 00:08:10,275 --> 00:08:13,078 HE IS JOINING US NOW. MIKE LINDELL. 218 00:08:13,078 --> 00:08:14,279 HEY MIKE, THANKS FOR TAKING TIME. 219 00:08:14,279 --> 00:08:17,816 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 220 00:08:17,816 --> 00:08:21,519 >> OH, FOR SURE. IT'S NOT LIKE I HAD ANYTHING THE 221 00:08:21,519 --> 00:08:23,788 HELL ELSE TO DO, NOW THAT I GOT TURNED AWAY FROM THE GOVERNOR'S 222 00:08:23,788 --> 00:08:26,491 BALL! 223 00:08:26,491 --> 00:08:27,892 >> Jimmy: RIGHT, RIGHT. 224 00:08:27,892 --> 00:08:28,226 [ LAUGHTER ] 225 00:08:28,226 --> 00:08:29,160 THAT'S WHAT I WANTED TO ASK ABOUT. 226 00:08:29,160 --> 00:08:30,395 IS IT TRUE YOU WERE INVITED AND THEN UNINVITED ONCE YOU GOT 227 00:08:30,395 --> 00:08:33,398 THERE? BECAUSE THAT SEEMS HARD TO BELIEVE. 228 00:08:33,398 --> 00:08:37,168 >> IT SURE AS HECK DID HAPPEN, JIM. AND I CAN PROVE IT. 229 00:08:37,168 --> 00:08:39,804 I HAVE THE CONFIDENTIAL DOCUMENT RIGHT HERE. 230 00:08:39,804 --> 00:08:42,607 [ LAUGHTER ] 231 00:08:42,607 --> 00:08:44,809 >> Jimmy: OKAY. WELL, THAT LOOKS A LITTLE BIT 232 00:08:44,809 --> 00:08:46,745 LIKE A CHEESECAKE FACTORY MENU TO ME. 233 00:08:46,745 --> 00:08:53,985 >> THE HELL IT DOES! OH, WILL YA LOOK AT THAT? WHO ‐‐ 234 00:08:53,985 --> 00:08:54,519 >> Jimmy: YEAH. 235 00:08:54,519 --> 00:08:56,288 >> TOO MANY CHOICES IN THIS. 236 00:08:56,288 --> 00:08:56,688 >> Jimmy: YEAH. 237 00:08:56,688 --> 00:08:59,157 >> OKAY. YOU GOT ORANGE CHICKEN, YOU GOT 238 00:08:59,157 --> 00:09:02,227 CHICKEN WITH ORANGE, YOU GOT A WHOLE FACTORY TURKEY ‐‐ 239 00:09:02,227 --> 00:09:02,927 >> Jimmy: MIKE ‐‐ 240 00:09:02,927 --> 00:09:06,865 >> LOOK AT THAT, TELL YOU WHAT I'LL TAKE TWO OF THE CHEESECAKE 241 00:09:06,865 --> 00:09:10,935 FLATBREAD PIZZAS AND A FRIED CHEESE MARGARITA! 242 00:09:10,935 --> 00:09:11,269 [ LAUGHTER ] 243 00:09:11,269 --> 00:09:13,505 >> Jimmy: MIKE, YOU'RE NOT AT THE CHEESECAKE FACTORY AND I'M 244 00:09:13,505 --> 00:09:14,939 NOT A WAITER. 245 00:09:14,939 --> 00:09:17,175 >> YOU SURE AS SHOOT AREN'T! THE SERVICE HERE IS TERRIBLE. 246 00:09:17,175 --> 00:09:19,444 >> Jimmy: NO ‐‐ 247 00:09:19,444 --> 00:09:20,945 >> THE POINT IS, I'VE BEEN SHADOW‐BANNED AGAIN, THIS TIME 248 00:09:20,945 --> 00:09:28,253 FROM THE REPUBLICAN GOVERNORS' ASSOCIATION, JUST BECAUSE I'M 249 00:09:28,253 --> 00:09:31,022 NOT A REPUBLICAN GOVERNOR, NOR HAVE I EVER BEEN IN ANY 250 00:09:31,022 --> 00:09:33,058 ASSOCIATION ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH! 251 00:09:33,058 --> 00:09:33,391 [ LAUGHTER ] 252 00:09:33,391 --> 00:09:35,527 >> Jimmy: WELL THAT DOES ‐‐ IT MAKES A LITTLE BIT OF SENSE ‐‐ 253 00:09:35,527 --> 00:09:37,295 >> AND IT'S ALL BECAUSE I'M GETTING TOO CLOSE TO THE TRUTH 254 00:09:37,295 --> 00:09:40,598 ABOUT THE DEEP STATE, LET ME TELL YOU. 255 00:09:40,598 --> 00:09:44,969 THE TRUTH ABOUT THE DEEP STATE. BECAUSE I GET TOO CLOSE WHEN I 256 00:09:44,969 --> 00:09:46,504 TALK TO PEOPLE, WHEN I TALK TO THEM. 257 00:09:46,504 --> 00:09:48,673 >> Jimmy: WHAT DO YOU MEAN? 258 00:09:48,673 --> 00:09:51,109 >> SOMETIMES I TOUCH THEM WITH MY MOUSTACHE RIGHT ON THE LIPS! 259 00:09:51,109 --> 00:09:52,310 >> Jimmy: WELL, YEAH ‐‐ 260 00:09:52,310 --> 00:09:54,479 >> THAT'S HOW YOU GET FIBER, FROM THE MOUSTACHE. 261 00:09:54,479 --> 00:09:56,314 >> Jimmy: WELL, YEAH ‐‐ THAT IS A LITTLE WEIRD, BUT THIS DOESN'T 262 00:09:56,314 --> 00:09:58,149 MAKE SENSE. WHY WOULD THEY INVITE YOU AND 263 00:09:58,149 --> 00:09:58,983 THEN ONCE YOU GOT THERE, TURN YOU AWAY? 264 00:09:58,983 --> 00:10:03,288 >> HOW SHOULD I KNOW? IT'S LIKE MY 50th BIRTHDAY PARTY 265 00:10:03,288 --> 00:10:03,655 ALL OVER AGAIN! 266 00:10:03,655 --> 00:10:05,023 [ LAUGHTER ] 267 00:10:05,023 --> 00:10:09,861 >> Jimmy: YOU WERE TURNED AWAY FROM YOUR 50th BIRTHDAY PARTY? 268 00:10:09,861 --> 00:10:11,763 >> YES, I WAS! I GOT CANCEL‐CULTURED BECAUSE I 269 00:10:11,763 --> 00:10:17,669 SHOWED UP NUDE! TWO GUYS THREW ME OUT OF ARBY'S! 270 00:10:17,669 --> 00:10:18,002 [ LAUGHTER ] 271 00:10:18,002 --> 00:10:20,638 >> Jimmy: OH, WAIT. YOUR 50th BIRTHDAY WAS AT ARBY'S? 272 00:10:20,638 --> 00:10:23,007 >> OH, SURE IT WAS. THE BIG 5‐0. 273 00:10:23,007 --> 00:10:25,777 THEY GIVE YOU FREE CURLY FRIES ON YOUR B‐DAY. 274 00:10:25,777 --> 00:10:26,378 [ LAUGHTER ] 275 00:10:26,378 --> 00:10:30,415 I DIDN'T BECOME A MILLIONAIRE BY TURNING DOWN FREE CURLY FRIES, 276 00:10:30,415 --> 00:10:31,783 THAT'S FOR DARN DAMN SURE. 277 00:10:31,783 --> 00:10:33,585 >> Jimmy: MIKE, HOW DID YOU BECOME A MILLIONAIRE? 278 00:10:33,585 --> 00:10:38,356 >> I BECAME A MILLIONAIRE THROUGH HARD WORK, DEDICATION, 279 00:10:38,356 --> 00:10:39,858 AND SELLIN' THE BEST DARNED PILLOWS A LONELY FELLA CAN HAVE 280 00:10:39,858 --> 00:10:41,626 SEX WITH! 281 00:10:41,626 --> 00:10:45,196 [ LAUGHTER ] 282 00:10:45,196 --> 00:10:50,268 >> Jimmy: OKAY, MIKE ‐‐ NO, NO, MIKE ‐‐ SETTLE ‐‐ SETTLE DOWN. 283 00:10:50,268 --> 00:10:52,604 >> YOU SETTLE DOWN, PAL! WE PAID FOR THIS. 284 00:10:52,604 --> 00:10:57,675 WHERE THE HECK IS THE POPCORN SHRIMP AND DIET DR. PEPSI I 285 00:10:57,675 --> 00:11:00,745 ORDERED? 286 00:11:00,745 --> 00:11:02,547 >> Jimmy: MIKE, I'M NOT THE WAITER. 287 00:11:02,547 --> 00:11:03,782 BUT WHILE I HAVE YOU, DO YOU THINK THERE'S ANY TRUTH TO THIS 288 00:11:03,782 --> 00:11:04,215 QANON THEORY THAT ‐‐ 289 00:11:04,215 --> 00:11:06,151 >> YES, I DO! YES, I DO. 290 00:11:06,151 --> 00:11:07,619 >> Jimmy: I HAVEN'T EVEN TOLD YOU WHAT THE THEORY IS YET! 291 00:11:07,619 --> 00:11:09,287 >> WELL, WHATEVER IT IS, I BELIEVE IT. 292 00:11:09,287 --> 00:11:11,389 [ LAUGHTER ] 293 00:11:11,389 --> 00:11:13,591 >> Jimmy: OKAY, WELL, NO. THE THEORY THAT IS THE 294 00:11:13,591 --> 00:11:16,127 GOVERNMENT IS USING UFOs TO DISTRACT US FROM VOTER FRAUD IN 295 00:11:16,127 --> 00:11:18,496 THE 2020 ELECTION. 296 00:11:18,496 --> 00:11:22,767 >> OH, YOU'RE DARN TOOTIN' THEY ARE! IT'S THE SAME REASON THEY 297 00:11:22,767 --> 00:11:25,904 CANCELLED "LAST MAN STANDING" AND KILLED DMX! 298 00:11:25,904 --> 00:11:26,371 [ LAUGHTER ] 299 00:11:26,371 --> 00:11:30,241 THEY DON'T WANT US TO KNOW THE TRUTH, JIMBO! 300 00:11:30,241 --> 00:11:32,510 BUT I KNOW THE TRUTH! I KNOW THE TRUTH ABOUT THE VOTER 301 00:11:32,510 --> 00:11:36,514 FRAUD, I KNOW THE TRUTH ABOUT HUNTER BIDEN, AND I KNOW THE 302 00:11:36,514 --> 00:11:39,584 TRUTH ABOUT "THE TRUTH ABOUT CATS AND DOGS!" 303 00:11:39,584 --> 00:11:46,591 [ LAUGHTER ] 304 00:11:46,591 --> 00:11:50,795 UMA THURMAN AND JANINE GALAPAGOS WERE ‐‐ 305 00:11:50,795 --> 00:11:51,196 [ LAUGHTER ] 306 00:11:51,196 --> 00:11:51,763 [ APPLAUSE ] 307 00:11:51,763 --> 00:11:54,999 ‐‐ WERE A GOSH‐DARN DELIGHT IN THIS UNDERRATED GEM FROM 1996! 308 00:11:54,999 --> 00:11:56,801 WHAT A DUO! CERTIFIED FRESH ON ROTTEN 309 00:11:56,801 --> 00:11:58,670 TOMATOES WITH AN 85% SCORE! BUT DOMINION WANTS YOU TO 310 00:11:58,670 --> 00:12:01,773 BELIEVE IT WAS A FLOP! I SAY OPEN THE BOX OFFICE TICKET 311 00:12:01,773 --> 00:12:05,944 MACHINES AND SHOW US THEIR GUTS YOU COWARDS! 312 00:12:05,944 --> 00:12:06,911 SHOW US THEIR GUTS, YOU COWARDS! 313 00:12:06,911 --> 00:12:10,281 >> Jimmy: WHAT IS THAT YOU'RE DRINKING, MIKE? 314 00:12:10,281 --> 00:12:12,250 >> THEY SAY IT'S OAT MILK, BUT THE LAST TIME I CHECKED, OATS 315 00:12:12,250 --> 00:12:13,518 DON'T EVEN HAVE TEATS! 316 00:12:13,518 --> 00:12:14,986 [ LAUGHTER ] 317 00:12:14,986 --> 00:12:19,491 >> Jimmy: YEAH, YEAH. OH, GOD. YEAH. 318 00:12:19,491 --> 00:12:23,461 >> WHATEVER IT IS, IT TASTES LIKE BABOON EJACULATE AND I LOVE 319 00:12:23,461 --> 00:12:25,763 THAT, I'VE ALWAYS LOVED THAT. NOW WHERE THE HECK IS THAT FRIED 320 00:12:25,763 --> 00:12:28,733 CHEESE MARGARITA I ORDERED? 321 00:12:28,733 --> 00:12:30,001 >> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT, MIKE. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ‐‐ 322 00:12:30,001 --> 00:12:34,405 >> THANK YOU JIMINY KRIMBLE. HEY, YOU WANT ME TO SEND YOU A 323 00:12:34,405 --> 00:12:36,274 PILLOW? I CAN SEND YOU A MYPILLOW. 324 00:12:36,274 --> 00:12:39,711 >> Jimmy: NO, THANK YOU, THAT'S OKAY. 325 00:12:39,711 --> 00:12:40,945 >> YOU CAN PORK IT, WHEN YOU'RE ALONE YOU CAN PORK IT REAL 326 00:12:40,945 --> 00:12:42,680 GOOD ‐‐ 327 00:12:42,680 --> 00:12:43,681 >> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT, THANK YOU, MIKE LINDELL. 328 00:12:43,681 --> 00:12:46,417 >> OH! 329 00:12:46,417 --> 00:12:46,751 [ APPLAUSE ] 330 00:12:46,751 --> 00:12:49,687 >> Jimmy: I NEED TO APOLOGIZE TO THE GOVERNOR. 331 00:12:49,687 --> 00:12:52,323 GOVERNOR NEWSOM, I HAD NO IDEA HE WAS GOING TO BEHAVE LIKE THAT. 332 00:12:52,323 --> 00:12:53,625 >> OH, HE NEEDS A NAP, HE NEEDS A NAP. 333 00:12:53,625 --> 00:12:58,062 [ LAUGHTER ] 334 00:12:58,062 --> 00:12:58,429 OH, MAN. 335 00:12:58,429 --> 00:13:01,299 >> Jimmy: WE GOT A GOOD SHOW FOR YOU TONIGHT. 336 00:13:01,299 --> 00:13:02,300 RORY SCOVEL IS HERE. WE HAVE MUSIC FROM 337 00:13:02,300 --> 00:13:05,270 CHLOE MORIONDO. GOVERNOR NEWSOM IS OUR STUDIO 338 00:13:05,270 --> 00:13:10,108 AUDIENCE. WE'LL BE BACK WITH EMMA STONE! 339 00:13:19,411 --> 00:13:19,944 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 340 00:13:19,944 --> 00:13:22,147 ♪ 341 00:13:22,147 --> 00:13:26,287 >> Jimmy: TONIGHT, FROM THE NEW SERIES CALLED "PHYSICAL" ON 342 00:13:26,287 --> 00:13:29,057 APPLE TV PLUS, RORY SCOVEL IS HERE. THEN LATER, SHE'S A 343 00:13:29,057 --> 00:13:32,060 SINGER‐SONGWRITER AND YOUTUBER FROM DETROIT. 344 00:13:32,060 --> 00:13:33,795 THIS IS HER NEW ALBUM "BLOOD BUNNY." 345 00:13:33,795 --> 00:13:37,098 MUSIC FROM CHLOE MORIONDO. 346 00:13:37,098 --> 00:13:39,934 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 347 00:13:39,934 --> 00:13:45,540 NEXT WEEK, WE ARE BACK AT WORK WITH NEW SHOWS WITH MICHAEL CHE, 348 00:13:45,540 --> 00:13:47,041 DAVID HARBOUR, RACHEL WEISZ, ROB RIGGLE, AND CILLIAN MURPHY, 349 00:13:47,041 --> 00:13:51,746 WITH MUSIC FROM HALF‐ALIVE, WILLIE JONES, FOUSHEE AND THE 350 00:13:51,746 --> 00:13:54,882 YOUNG PUNK ROCK GIRL GROUP FROM RIGHT HERE IN L. A. 351 00:13:54,882 --> 00:13:56,117 THAT IS SWEEPING THE NATION, THE LINDA LINDAS WILL BE WITH US 352 00:13:56,117 --> 00:13:58,886 TOO. 353 00:13:58,886 --> 00:13:59,387 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 354 00:13:59,387 --> 00:14:01,089 YOU'RE GOING TO LIKE IT A LOT. OUR FIRST GUEST IS AN 355 00:14:01,089 --> 00:14:03,324 OSCAR‐WINNING ACTRESS YOU KNOW FROM MANY FILMS OF NOTE, HER 356 00:14:03,324 --> 00:14:07,562 LATEST IS THE BIG‐SCREEN ORIGIN STORY, "CRUELLA" AS IN "DE VIL." 357 00:14:07,562 --> 00:14:09,597 IT COMES TO THEATERS AND ON DISNEY PLUS PREMIER ACCESS 358 00:14:09,597 --> 00:14:15,570 STARTING TOMORROW. PLEASE SAY HELLO TO EMMA STONE. 359 00:14:15,570 --> 00:14:16,070 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 360 00:14:16,070 --> 00:14:16,403 HEY, EMMA. 361 00:14:16,403 --> 00:14:18,272 >> HELLO! 362 00:14:18,272 --> 00:14:19,373 >> Jimmy: GOOD TO SEE YOU. 363 00:14:19,373 --> 00:14:21,242 >> HOW ARE YOU? GOOD TO SEE YOU. 364 00:14:21,242 --> 00:14:23,244 >> Jimmy: I'M GOOD, I'M VERY ‐‐ I'M DOING WELL. 365 00:14:23,244 --> 00:14:28,282 AND BY THE WAY, I THINK THE LAST TIME I SAW YOU WAS BACKSTAGE AT 366 00:14:28,282 --> 00:14:30,718 THE OSCARS AFTER YOU WON. 367 00:14:30,718 --> 00:14:31,185 >> YES. 368 00:14:31,185 --> 00:14:35,156 >> Jimmy: AND THEN WE THOUGHT "LA LA LAND" WON BEST PICTURE. 369 00:14:35,156 --> 00:14:35,556 >> UH‐HUH. 370 00:14:35,556 --> 00:14:40,261 >> Jimmy: IT TURNED OUT THAT "LA LA LAND" HAD NOT WON BEST 371 00:14:40,261 --> 00:14:42,964 PICTURE, "MOONLIGHT" HAD WON BEST PICTURE. 372 00:14:42,964 --> 00:14:43,297 >> YES. 373 00:14:43,297 --> 00:14:48,136 >> I WONDER WHAT YOU REMEMBER, BECAUSE I'VE NO NOT HAD A CHANCO 374 00:14:48,136 --> 00:14:49,770 TALK TO YOU ABOUT THAT CRAZY MOMENT. 375 00:14:49,770 --> 00:14:50,938 DO YOU REMEMBER ANY OF THAT? 376 00:14:50,938 --> 00:14:58,379 >> I THINK WE ALL WENT INTO A 377 00:14:58,379 --> 00:15:01,048 SORT OF LIKE LOHALLUCINATION STATE. HOW DID YOU FEEL? 378 00:15:01,048 --> 00:15:04,719 YOU'D HOSTED THE OSCARS ON STAGE FOR HOURS, THEN COMPLETE 379 00:15:04,719 --> 00:15:05,052 PANDEMONIUM. 380 00:15:05,052 --> 00:15:09,190 >> Jimmy: I FELT ‐‐ I WILL TELL YOU, I FELT CONFUSED, MOSTLY. 381 00:15:09,190 --> 00:15:12,960 I FELT SUDDENLY FEARFUL, BECAUSE AS I WAS WALKING OFFSTAGE PEOPLE 382 00:15:12,960 --> 00:15:16,397 WERE LIKE, "HEY, WAS THAT A PRANK THAT YOU PULLED?" 383 00:15:16,397 --> 00:15:19,600 "NO, NO, THAT WASN'T A PRANK THAT I PULLED!" 384 00:15:19,600 --> 00:15:19,934 [ LAUGHTER ] 385 00:15:19,934 --> 00:15:22,870 THEN I REMEMBER YOU WERE GONE REALLY QUICKLY. 386 00:15:22,870 --> 00:15:27,108 YOU WISELY GOT THE HELL OUT OF THERE. AND ‐‐ 387 00:15:27,108 --> 00:15:28,042 >> YEAH. 388 00:15:28,042 --> 00:15:31,746 >> Jimmy: I REMEMBER WARREN BEATTY WALKING AROUND WITH A 389 00:15:31,746 --> 00:15:32,513 CARD THAT HAD YOUR NAME ON IT. 390 00:15:32,513 --> 00:15:34,315 >> YES. THEN THEY KEPT TELLING ME THAT 391 00:15:34,315 --> 00:15:37,919 WAS THE ONLY CARD AND THAT I WAS ‐‐ I HAVE MY CARD! 392 00:15:37,919 --> 00:15:40,555 THEY WERE LIKE, BUT WARREN WOULDN'T GIVE TO IT ANYONE 393 00:15:40,555 --> 00:15:43,591 BECAUSE HE WANTS TO SHOW TO IT BARRY. IT WAS A WHOLE ‐‐ IT WAS 394 00:15:43,591 --> 00:15:44,258 ABSOLUTE CHAOS. 395 00:15:44,258 --> 00:15:47,094 >> Jimmy: THERE WERE TWO CARDS. FOR THE RECORD, THERE WERE TWO 396 00:15:47,094 --> 00:15:48,596 CARDS WITH YOUR NAME ON THEM. 397 00:15:48,596 --> 00:15:51,666 >> LEARNED THAT LATER THAT NIGHT. DIDN'T KNOW THAT. 398 00:15:51,666 --> 00:15:52,800 >> Jimmy: AND WARREN ‐‐ 399 00:15:52,800 --> 00:15:55,303 >> IT WAS WILD. 400 00:15:55,303 --> 00:15:57,772 >> Jimmy: QUITE WISELY, HELD ON TO THAT CARD. 401 00:15:57,772 --> 00:16:01,876 HAD HE GIVEN THAT CARD UP, NO ONE WOULD EVER HAVE KNOWN WHAT 402 00:16:01,876 --> 00:16:05,046 WAS WRITTEN ON THAT CARD. BUT I SAW THAT CARD AND IT SAID, 403 00:16:05,046 --> 00:16:09,183 "EMMA STONE, "LA LA LAND." YOU DID GET YOUR OSCAR, THEY 404 00:16:09,183 --> 00:16:10,384 DIDN'T TAKE THAT BACK? 405 00:16:10,384 --> 00:16:13,788 >> THEY DIDN'T TAKE IT BACK. YOU SENT ME SOME UNDERWEAR. 406 00:16:13,788 --> 00:16:14,121 [ LAUGHTER ] 407 00:16:14,121 --> 00:16:16,757 >> Jimmy: FOR HIM. TO MAKE THAT CLEAR. 408 00:16:16,757 --> 00:16:21,095 >> FOR HIM. HE DOES SEEM ‐‐ YOU KNOW. 409 00:16:21,095 --> 00:16:24,699 ON THE CARD HE SAID TO BRING SOME DECENCY TO YOUR HOME, WHICH 410 00:16:24,699 --> 00:16:27,001 HE'S WORN THAT UNDERWEAR EVER SINCE. 411 00:16:27,001 --> 00:16:27,334 [ LAUGHTER ] 412 00:16:27,334 --> 00:16:32,273 >> Jimmy: I'M GLAD, I'M GLAD. THERE'S TOO MUCH NUDITY GOING ON 413 00:16:32,273 --> 00:16:33,641 IN PEOPLE'S HOMES NOWADAYS. 414 00:16:33,641 --> 00:16:35,176 >> EXACTLY. YOU DON'T LIKE THAT NUDITY IN 415 00:16:35,176 --> 00:16:35,576 THE HOME. 416 00:16:35,576 --> 00:16:38,879 >> Jimmy: I WOULD THINK ‐‐ THAT WAS A WEIRD TWIST ON SOMETHING 417 00:16:38,879 --> 00:16:42,250 YOU'D MAYBE BEEN FANTASIZING ABOUT SINCE YOU WERE A LITTLE 418 00:16:42,250 --> 00:16:43,551 GIRL. WHEN YOU WERE A KID WHAT MOVIES 419 00:16:43,551 --> 00:16:46,821 DID YOU GUYS WATCH, WHAT WERE THE BIG ONES IN YOUR HOUSE? 420 00:16:46,821 --> 00:16:51,993 >> WE WATCHED A LOT OF COMEDY BECAUSE MY DAD IS A VERY BIG 421 00:16:51,993 --> 00:16:57,331 KIND OF LIKE '70s AND '80s COMEDY FAN. 422 00:16:57,331 --> 00:16:59,900 HE SORT OF ‐‐ WE WATCHED "THE JERK" A LOT. 423 00:16:59,900 --> 00:17:05,606 WE WATCHED A LOT OF STEVE MARTIN. HE SHOWED ME ‐‐ WE'D WATCH 424 00:17:05,606 --> 00:17:09,610 "PLANES, TRAINS AND AUTOMOBILES" AND "SHAW HANG REDEMPTION." 425 00:17:09,610 --> 00:17:09,943 [ LAUGHTER ] 426 00:17:09,943 --> 00:17:10,478 >> Jimmy: HOW OLD WERE YOU? 427 00:17:10,478 --> 00:17:14,015 >> LIKE ABOUT 8. WE WOULD WATCH THOSE MOVIES ALL 428 00:17:14,015 --> 00:17:16,484 THE TIME. I DON'T KNOW WHY WE WATCHED 429 00:17:16,484 --> 00:17:19,954 "SHAWSHANK" SO OFTEN. "PLANES, TRAINS, AUTOMOBILES," 430 00:17:19,954 --> 00:17:21,489 "THE JERK," THOSE MOVIES. 431 00:17:21,489 --> 00:17:24,025 >> Jimmy: IT'S GOOD FOR AN 8‐YEAR‐OLD TO LEARN WHAT PRISON 432 00:17:24,025 --> 00:17:24,792 IS LIKE. 433 00:17:24,792 --> 00:17:25,426 [ LAUGHTER ] 434 00:17:25,426 --> 00:17:27,028 >> YEAH. IT IS. 435 00:17:27,028 --> 00:17:29,930 >> Jimmy: I'M GOING THROUGH THAT MOVIE, THERE'S A LOT OF BAD 436 00:17:29,930 --> 00:17:30,331 STUFF IN THAT. 437 00:17:30,331 --> 00:17:31,866 >> THERE'S A LOT OF BAD STUFF IN THAT. 438 00:17:31,866 --> 00:17:35,469 >> A LOT OF BAD LANGUAGE IN "PLANES, TRAINS AND AUTOMOBILES." 439 00:17:35,469 --> 00:17:35,870 >> THAT'S RIGHT. 440 00:17:35,870 --> 00:17:38,606 >> Jimmy: BOTH OF THOSE MOVIES ARE TWO OF MY FAVORITES. 441 00:17:38,606 --> 00:17:40,841 "PLANES, TRAINS AND AUTOMOBILES," THAT'S ONE OF 442 00:17:40,841 --> 00:17:42,910 THOSE MOVIES YOU DON'T EXPECTATION TO GET TEARED UP AT 443 00:17:42,910 --> 00:17:45,846 THE END, BUT YOU DO GET TEARED UP AT THE END. 444 00:17:45,846 --> 00:17:47,782 >> THAT'S ONE OF THE GREATEST MOVIES OF ALL TIME. 445 00:17:47,782 --> 00:17:50,818 THAT COMBINATION OF FUNNY AND HEARTBREAKING IS PERFECT IN THAT 446 00:17:50,818 --> 00:17:51,151 MOVIE. 447 00:17:51,151 --> 00:17:53,254 >> Jimmy: YEAH. HAVE YOU EVER MET STEVE MARTIN? 448 00:17:53,254 --> 00:17:56,090 I ASSUME YOU'VE MET HIM AND TOLD HIM ABOUT THAT? 449 00:17:56,090 --> 00:17:58,626 >> I'VE ‐‐ I'VE MET HIM. NO, I HAVEN'T TOLD HIM THAT. 450 00:17:58,626 --> 00:18:02,663 HE'S GOING TO LEARN THIS TONIGHT THAT I'M COMPLETELY HEAD OVER 451 00:18:02,663 --> 00:18:03,597 HEELS INSANE ABOUT HIM. 452 00:18:03,597 --> 00:18:05,066 >> Jimmy: OH, YEAH, SURE. YEAH. 453 00:18:05,066 --> 00:18:08,969 >> I TRY TO PLAY IT COOL WHENEVER I'VE MET HIM. 454 00:18:08,969 --> 00:18:10,204 LIKE, "YOUR NAME'S STEVE? OH, THAT'S NICE." 455 00:18:10,204 --> 00:18:13,140 [ LAUGHTER ] 456 00:18:13,140 --> 00:18:15,176 >> Jimmy: YEAH. DO YOU FIND THAT ANYONE LIKES 457 00:18:15,176 --> 00:18:17,878 THAT, WHEN YOU DO THAT? I THINK THAT PEOPLE LIKE ALWAYS 458 00:18:17,878 --> 00:18:21,148 THINK, I'M GOING TO PLAY IT COOL AND ACT LIKE I DON'T CARE, THEN 459 00:18:21,148 --> 00:18:22,917 THE REACTION IS USUALLY, OH, THAT ONE DOESN'T LIKE ME. 460 00:18:22,917 --> 00:18:24,518 [ LAUGHTER ] 461 00:18:24,518 --> 00:18:28,089 >> YEAH, EXACTLY, NO. I DO NOT VERY OFTEN PLAY IT COOL. 462 00:18:28,089 --> 00:18:31,692 BUT I THINK I'VE TRIED TO KEEP IT SEMI COOL IN FRONT OF STEVE 463 00:18:31,692 --> 00:18:34,462 MARTIN, BECAUSE I'VE CRIED IN FRONT OF MULTIPLE OTHER PEOPLE. 464 00:18:34,462 --> 00:18:34,929 AND IT'S GOT TO STOP. 465 00:18:34,929 --> 00:18:37,064 [ LAUGHTER ] 466 00:18:37,064 --> 00:18:39,500 IT'S GOT TO STOP. I HAVE THIS INSTINCT TO BURST 467 00:18:39,500 --> 00:18:43,304 INTO TEARS WHEN IT'S SOMEONE THAT I'VE REALLY ADMIRED SINCE 468 00:18:43,304 --> 00:18:44,939 CHILDHOOD. SO IT'S HAPPENED TOO MANY TIMES. 469 00:18:44,939 --> 00:18:47,608 >> Jimmy: GIVE ME ONE. ONE PERSON YOU'VE CRIED IN FRONT 470 00:18:47,608 --> 00:18:52,880 OF, YOU WERE SO EXCITED. 471 00:18:52,880 --> 00:18:55,116 >> I'VE CRIED IN FRONT OF DIANE KEATON. 472 00:18:55,116 --> 00:18:58,519 I DIDN'T CRY IN FRONT OF BILL MURRAY BUT I WALKED AWAY AND 473 00:18:58,519 --> 00:18:58,852 CRIED. 474 00:18:58,852 --> 00:18:59,186 [ LAUGHTER ] 475 00:18:59,186 --> 00:19:02,022 I WAS IN AN ELEVATOR FOR THE FIRST TIME WITH LORNE MICHAELS 476 00:19:02,022 --> 00:19:06,727 AND I TURNED INTO THE CORNER OF THE ELEVATOR AND CRIED. 477 00:19:06,727 --> 00:19:07,060 [ LAUGHTER ] 478 00:19:07,060 --> 00:19:07,395 >> Jimmy: WOW. 479 00:19:07,395 --> 00:19:09,296 >> I DON'T DO IT AS MUCH ANYMORE. 480 00:19:09,296 --> 00:19:12,767 BUT WHEN I WAS A LITTLE BIT YOUNGER, IN MY EARLY 20s, I 481 00:19:12,767 --> 00:19:15,236 WOULD. IT JUST WOULD OVERWHELM ME SO 482 00:19:15,236 --> 00:19:20,307 MUCH, I WAS LIKE A CHIHUAHUA. THEN IT WOULD ‐‐ YOU KNOW. 483 00:19:20,307 --> 00:19:23,611 >> Jimmy: SCENES FROM THESE MOVIES THAT YOU LOVED, WHEN YOU 484 00:19:23,611 --> 00:19:26,514 WERE A KID, A YOUNG AGE WORK, YOU MEMORIZE THE MOVIES? 485 00:19:26,514 --> 00:19:29,884 >> OH, YEAH. BIG‐TIME. I HAD A LOT OF "THE JERK" 486 00:19:29,884 --> 00:19:33,154 MEMORIZED. I LOVED THAT. I LOVED, YOU KNOW, THE [ BLEEP ] 487 00:19:33,154 --> 00:19:36,123 MONOLOGUE FROM "PLANES, TRAINS AND AUTOMOBILES." 488 00:19:36,123 --> 00:19:36,457 [ LAUGHTER ] 489 00:19:36,457 --> 00:19:37,491 >> Jimmy: THE RENTAL CAR SCENE. 490 00:19:37,491 --> 00:19:39,927 >> THE RENTAL CAR SCENE, I LOVED THE RENTAL CAR SCENE. 491 00:19:39,927 --> 00:19:42,463 >> Jimmy: THAT'S GOT TO BE BEAUTIFUL TO HEAR OUT OF AN 492 00:19:42,463 --> 00:19:43,030 8‐YEAR‐OLD'S MOUTH. 493 00:19:43,030 --> 00:19:43,363 [ LAUGHTER ] 494 00:19:43,363 --> 00:19:46,267 >> OH, GOD, WAS IT GOOD. OH, I LOVED IT, I LOVED IT. 495 00:19:46,267 --> 00:19:48,936 >> Jimmy: DO YOU REMEMBER IT STILL? 496 00:19:48,936 --> 00:19:49,269 >> YEAH. 497 00:19:49,269 --> 00:19:51,372 [ LAUGHTER ] 498 00:19:51,372 --> 00:19:53,140 >> Jimmy: GIVE US A LITTLE BIT OF IT. 499 00:19:53,140 --> 00:19:54,909 OR A LOT OF IT, WHATEVER YOU FEEL LIKE. 500 00:19:54,909 --> 00:19:59,547 >> OKAY. OKAY. I'LL DO IT ‐‐ I'LL DO IT BECAUSE 501 00:19:59,547 --> 00:20:03,551 I WANT ‐‐ I DO ACTUALLY WANT TO HEAR THIS BLEEPED. 502 00:20:03,551 --> 00:20:03,884 [ LAUGHTER ] 503 00:20:03,884 --> 00:20:04,318 >> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT. 504 00:20:04,318 --> 00:20:05,453 >> YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO BLEEP IT. 505 00:20:05,453 --> 00:20:07,421 >> Jimmy: WE WILL HAVE TO BLEEP IT, YEAH, FOR SURE. 506 00:20:07,421 --> 00:20:10,458 >> OKAY. BUT ‐‐ OH, THIS IS NERVE‐RACKING. 507 00:20:10,458 --> 00:20:12,326 LET ME SEE IF I CAN ACTUALLY DO IT LIVE. 508 00:20:12,326 --> 00:20:14,128 BECAUSE I'M PROBABLY FORGET PARTS. 509 00:20:14,128 --> 00:20:15,463 >> Jimmy: YEAH THINK IT THROUGH. REMEMBER ‐‐ 510 00:20:15,463 --> 00:20:17,465 >> OKAY, SO THIS IS ‐‐ 511 00:20:17,465 --> 00:20:20,000 >> Jimmy: HE'S THERE IN THE AIRPORT, AND HE WANTS HIS RENTAL 512 00:20:20,000 --> 00:20:20,333 CAR. 513 00:20:20,333 --> 00:20:20,935 >> YES, YES. 514 00:20:20,935 --> 00:20:22,570 >> Jimmy: AND I THINK HE DIDN'T HAVE THE CONTRACT. 515 00:20:22,570 --> 00:20:23,504 >> HE'S BEEN THROUGH A LOT. 516 00:20:23,504 --> 00:20:24,104 >> Jimmy: YEAH. 517 00:20:24,104 --> 00:20:26,640 >> HE'S BEEN THROUGH A LOT. THEY TOOK HIM TO GET HIS RENTAL 518 00:20:26,640 --> 00:20:30,711 CAR, IT WASN'T THERE, AND HE GOES THROUGH THIS ENTIRE JOURNEY 519 00:20:30,711 --> 00:20:33,848 TO GET BACK TO THE RENTAL CAR PLACE, AND THIS WOMAN IS LIKE 520 00:20:33,848 --> 00:20:38,319 REALLY JOLLY AT THE RENTAL CAR PLACE, AND HE IS SO PISSED. 521 00:20:38,319 --> 00:20:39,420 [ LAUGHTER ] 522 00:20:39,420 --> 00:20:43,157 OKAY. ALL RIGHT. YOU HAVE TO SAY A LINE, THOUGH. 523 00:20:43,157 --> 00:20:43,524 >> Jimmy: OKAY. 524 00:20:43,524 --> 00:20:48,796 >> YOU SAY, MAY I HELP ‐‐ SO IT'S, MAY I HELP YOU? 525 00:20:48,796 --> 00:20:50,698 CAN YOU DO THE IMPRESSION? 526 00:20:50,698 --> 00:20:51,232 >> Jimmy: MAY I HELP YOU? 527 00:20:51,232 --> 00:20:57,137 >> THAT'S PERFECT. YOU CAN START BY WIPING THAT 528 00:20:57,137 --> 00:20:59,173 [ BLEEP ] DUMB‐ASS SMILE OFF 529 00:20:59,173 --> 00:21:03,010 YOUR ROSY [ BLEEP ] CHEEKS. AND THEN YOU CAN GIVE ME A 530 00:21:03,010 --> 00:21:04,211 [ BLEEP ] AUTOMOBILE. 531 00:21:04,211 --> 00:21:08,082 A [ BLEEP ] DAT SAN, A [ BLEEP ] TOYOTA, A [ BLEEP ] MUSTANG, A 532 00:21:08,082 --> 00:21:09,450 [ BLEEP ] BUICK, FOUR WHEELS AND 533 00:21:09,450 --> 00:21:11,252 A SEAT. AND THEN YOU HAVE TO SAY, I 534 00:21:11,252 --> 00:21:12,820 REALLY DON'T CARE FOR THE WAY YOU'RE SPEAKING. 535 00:21:12,820 --> 00:21:14,255 >> Jimmy: SIR, I REALLY DON'T CARE FOR THE WAY YOU'RE SPEAKING 536 00:21:14,255 --> 00:21:15,990 TO ME. 537 00:21:15,990 --> 00:21:19,426 >> AND I REALLY DON'T CARE FOR THE WAY YOUR COMPANY LEFT ME IN 538 00:21:19,426 --> 00:21:23,330 THE MIDDLE OF [ BLEEP ] NOWHERE, WITH [ BLEEP ] KEYS TO A 539 00:21:23,330 --> 00:21:24,465 [ BLEEP ] CAR THAT ISN'T 540 00:21:24,465 --> 00:21:25,165 [ BLEEP ] THERE. 541 00:21:25,165 --> 00:21:29,403 AND I REALLY DIDN'T CARE TO WALK TO [ BLEEP ] WALK DOWN A 542 00:21:29,403 --> 00:21:32,306 [ BLEEP ] HIGHWAY AND ACROSS A 543 00:21:32,306 --> 00:21:34,074 [ BLEEP ] RUNWAY TO GET BACK 544 00:21:34,074 --> 00:21:35,576 HERE AND HAVE YOU SMILE IN MY 545 00:21:35,576 --> 00:21:35,943 [ BLEEP ] FACE. 546 00:21:35,943 --> 00:21:39,113 [ LAUGHTER ] 547 00:21:39,113 --> 00:21:42,082 I WANT A [ BLEEP ] CAR RIGHT 548 00:21:42,082 --> 00:21:42,416 [ BLEEP ] NOW. 549 00:21:42,416 --> 00:21:42,749 [ LAUGHTER ] 550 00:21:42,749 --> 00:21:43,817 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 551 00:21:43,817 --> 00:21:49,056 >> Jimmy: WOW. 552 00:21:49,056 --> 00:21:53,460 >> 8. 553 00:21:53,460 --> 00:21:56,564 >> Jimmy: AND THEN ‐‐ EDIE SAYS SOMETHING LIKE, WELL THEN YOU'RE 554 00:21:56,564 --> 00:21:57,898 [ BLEEP ]ED, OR SOMETHING, 555 00:21:57,898 --> 00:21:59,166 RIGHT? AND THAT WAS THE END. 556 00:21:59,166 --> 00:22:02,536 >> SHE SAYS, DO YOU HAVE YOUR PAPER OR WHATEVER? 557 00:22:02,536 --> 00:22:04,338 HE GOES, I THREW IT AWAY. THEN SHE GOES, YOU'RE 558 00:22:04,338 --> 00:22:04,671 [ BLEEP ]ED. 559 00:22:04,671 --> 00:22:06,807 [ LAUGHTER ] 560 00:22:06,807 --> 00:22:08,809 >> Jimmy: WOW, BEAUTIFULLY DONE. 561 00:22:08,809 --> 00:22:09,142 [ APPLAUSE ] 562 00:22:09,142 --> 00:22:09,543 >> THANKS. 563 00:22:09,543 --> 00:22:13,647 >> Jimmy: YOU SHOULD DO MORE OF THE ACTING STUFF. 564 00:22:13,647 --> 00:22:13,980 >> YEAH. 565 00:22:13,980 --> 00:22:18,319 >> Jimmy: EMMA STONE, "CRUEL ELLA" IS THE MOVIE. 566 00:22:18,319 --> 00:22:20,774 MORE WITH EMMA STONE WHEN WE RETURN! 567 00:22:22,501 --> 00:22:24,269 >>> WHO ARE YOU? YOU LOOK VAGUELY FAMILIAR. 568 00:22:24,269 --> 00:22:28,912 >> I LOOK STUNNING. I DON'T KNOW ABOUT FAMILIAR, 569 00:22:28,912 --> 00:22:29,245 DARLING. 570 00:22:29,245 --> 00:22:33,116 >> YOUR HAIR, IS IT REAL? 571 00:22:33,116 --> 00:22:35,819 >> I LIKE TO MAKE AN IMPACT. 572 00:22:35,819 --> 00:22:41,044 >> RIGHT. WHAT WAS YOUR NAME? 573 00:22:41,044 --> 00:22:44,073 >> CRUELLA. 574 00:22:44,073 --> 00:22:46,543 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 575 00:22:46,543 --> 00:22:50,313 >> Jimmy: THAT IS EMMA STONE AND EMMA THOMPSON IN "CRUELLA" WHICH 576 00:22:50,313 --> 00:22:53,817 OPENS IN THEATERS AND ON DISNEY PLUS PREMIER ACCESS TOMORROW. 577 00:22:53,817 --> 00:22:57,621 YOU ARE FANTASTIC IN THIS MOVIE. AND EMMA THOMPSON IS GREAT IN 578 00:22:57,621 --> 00:23:01,258 THE MOVIE, TOO. I HAVE TO SAY, THIS IS A ROLE 579 00:23:01,258 --> 00:23:03,627 THAT, IF I WAS AN ACTOR, I WOULD NOT WANT. 580 00:23:03,627 --> 00:23:09,366 BECAUSE IT IS SUCH AN ICONIC ‐‐ EVEN THOUGH IT'S ANIMATED AND 581 00:23:09,366 --> 00:23:14,004 YOU'RE DOING IT ‐‐ DOING LIVE ACTION, IT'S AN ABSOLUTELY 582 00:23:14,004 --> 00:23:17,340 ICONIC VILLAINESS. AND YOU CAN REALLY ‐‐ I MEAN, 583 00:23:17,340 --> 00:23:19,976 YOU REALLY NAILED IT, BUT YOU CAN ALMOST ONLY SCREW IT UP, 584 00:23:19,976 --> 00:23:21,678 RIGHT? 585 00:23:21,678 --> 00:23:22,212 [ LAUGHTER ] 586 00:23:22,212 --> 00:23:24,481 >> YEAH. I MEAN, THANKS FOR SAYING THAT. 587 00:23:24,481 --> 00:23:27,284 IT IS SUBJECTIVE. I'M SURE MANY PEOPLE DO THINK I 588 00:23:27,284 --> 00:23:28,118 SCREWED IT UP. 589 00:23:28,118 --> 00:23:28,451 [ LAUGHTER ] 590 00:23:28,451 --> 00:23:31,121 >> Jimmy: NO, NO. I LOOKED AT THE REVIEWS TODAY, 591 00:23:31,121 --> 00:23:33,923 NO ONE THINKS YOU SCREWED IT UP. IT IS REALLY GOOD. 592 00:23:33,923 --> 00:23:35,892 I'M NOT JUST SAYING THAT, IT IS ABSOLUTELY GREAT. 593 00:23:35,892 --> 00:23:36,526 >> THANKS. 594 00:23:36,526 --> 00:23:44,434 >> Jimmy: AND CRUELLA DE VIL, I 595 00:23:44,434 --> 00:23:48,471 DON'T KNOW WHY THAT WOULD ESCAPE ME. 596 00:23:48,471 --> 00:23:48,805 [ LAUGHTER ] 597 00:23:48,805 --> 00:23:53,777 CRUELLA DE VIL, WE LEARNED HER BACKSTORY, WHICH OBVIOUSLY I'M 598 00:23:53,777 --> 00:23:57,080 NOT GOING TO REVEAL ANY OF IT. DO YOU ENJOY WORKING WITH ALL 599 00:23:57,080 --> 00:23:58,448 THOSE DOGS IN THE MOVIE? 600 00:23:58,448 --> 00:24:00,950 >> OH, GOD. THAT WAS THE BEST PART. 601 00:24:00,950 --> 00:24:01,951 >> Jimmy: OH, IT WAS? 602 00:24:01,951 --> 00:24:04,521 >> THAT WAS THE BEST PART BY FAR, OH, YEAH. 603 00:24:04,521 --> 00:24:07,223 IT WAS SO MUCH FUN. EXCEPT THEY DON'T LET YOU ‐‐ 604 00:24:07,223 --> 00:24:11,027 THESE DOGS ARE PROFESSIONAL ACTORS, AND THEY'RE BASICALLY ‐‐ 605 00:24:11,027 --> 00:24:15,398 THEY'RE BASICALLY LIKE THE ‐‐ THEY'RE THE SUPERSTARS OF THE 606 00:24:15,398 --> 00:24:17,233 SET. LIKE NO ONE CAN REALLY SPEAK TO 607 00:24:17,233 --> 00:24:20,270 THEM THE WAY YOU WANT TO SPEAK TO A DOG, BECAUSE THEY HAVE TO 608 00:24:20,270 --> 00:24:22,539 PREPARE. YOU CAN'T GET THEM ALL RILED UP. 609 00:24:22,539 --> 00:24:24,474 >> Jimmy: WHAT DO YOU MEAN, NOBODY CAN SPEAK TO THEM THE WAY 610 00:24:24,474 --> 00:24:25,909 YOU WANT TO SPEAK TO A DOG? 611 00:24:25,909 --> 00:24:28,645 >> YOU KNOW, YOU WANT ‐‐ I MEAN, I DON'T KNOW IF YOU WANT TO DO 612 00:24:28,645 --> 00:24:32,949 THAT. FOR ME I'M LIKE, HEY, WAIT, HOW 613 00:24:32,949 --> 00:24:34,150 ARE YOU DOING, MAN? 614 00:24:34,150 --> 00:24:34,484 [ LAUGHTER ] 615 00:24:34,484 --> 00:24:37,921 THAT KIND OF STUFF. THEY DON'T LET YOU DO THAT. 616 00:24:37,921 --> 00:24:40,557 >> Jimmy: I DID DO THAT TO A DOG ON MY BLOCK THIS MORNING AND I 617 00:24:40,557 --> 00:24:45,362 REALIZED, OH, I SOUND RIDICULOUS. THIS DOG MUST THINK I'M A FOOL. 618 00:24:45,362 --> 00:24:45,695 [ LAUGHTER ] 619 00:24:45,695 --> 00:24:49,165 YOU CAN'T DO THAT BECAUSE THEY'RE LOCKED IN OR SOMETHING? 620 00:24:49,165 --> 00:24:51,568 >> THEY HAVE ‐‐ THEY HAVE TO GET IN THE ZONE. 621 00:24:51,568 --> 00:24:55,538 IF YOU'RE DOING THAT BETWEEN TAKES, THEY'LL GET TOO ‐‐ 622 00:24:55,538 --> 00:24:56,072 >> Jimmy: OH. 623 00:24:56,072 --> 00:24:59,743 >> SO YOU HAVE TO JUST, LIKE, LET THEM HAVE THEIR SPACE, GET 624 00:24:59,743 --> 00:25:02,345 IN THE MOMENT. SO THEY PREPARE MUCH MORE THAN I 625 00:25:02,345 --> 00:25:02,678 EVER HAVE. 626 00:25:02,678 --> 00:25:04,814 [ LAUGHTER ] 627 00:25:04,814 --> 00:25:06,850 >> Jimmy: I'M TOLD THAT'S SIMILAR TO WHAT IT'S LIKE 628 00:25:06,850 --> 00:25:07,350 WORKING WITH MATT DAMON. 629 00:25:07,350 --> 00:25:10,320 [ LAUGHTER ] 630 00:25:10,320 --> 00:25:13,523 YOU JUST HAVE TO KEEP HIM FOCUSED, YOU HAVE TO GIVE HIM A 631 00:25:13,523 --> 00:25:15,325 LITTLE SNACK EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE. 632 00:25:15,325 --> 00:25:17,727 >> YEAH, YEAH. LITTLE PIECES OF SALAMI. 633 00:25:17,727 --> 00:25:19,863 YEAH, I'VE HEARD THAT TOO. 634 00:25:19,863 --> 00:25:23,967 >> Jimmy: HEY, THAT'S THE TITLE OF HIS AUTOBIOGRAPHY, YOU DIDN'T 635 00:25:23,967 --> 00:25:24,367 KNOW THAT? 636 00:25:24,367 --> 00:25:28,037 [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE ] 637 00:25:28,037 --> 00:25:33,576 THE CACKLE, THE LAUGH, THE CRUELLA DE VIL, IS CACKLE, IS 638 00:25:33,576 --> 00:25:34,978 THAT WHAT YOU WOULD CALL IT? 639 00:25:34,978 --> 00:25:36,613 >> CACKLE IS APPROPRIATE. 640 00:25:36,613 --> 00:25:39,149 >> Jimmy: IS THAT SOMETHING THAT YOU GO IN KNOWING HOW YOU'RE 641 00:25:39,149 --> 00:25:41,184 GOING TO DO IT? OR WORK WITH THE DIRECTOR AND 642 00:25:41,184 --> 00:25:43,219 TRY OUT A WHOLE BUNCH OF DIFFERENT CACKLES, OR WHAT? 643 00:25:43,219 --> 00:25:47,424 >> NO, I DID ‐‐ I DID ALL MY CACKLING IN THE SHOWER. 644 00:25:47,424 --> 00:25:48,625 >> Jimmy: IN THE SHOWER, OKAY. 645 00:25:48,625 --> 00:25:50,260 >> I DID MY CACKLING ALONE. 646 00:25:50,260 --> 00:25:53,563 >> Jimmy: YOU DID YOUR CACKLING ALONE. THEN YOU INTRODUCED IT TO 647 00:25:53,563 --> 00:25:58,201 EVERYONE ON THE SET. DO YOU NOW, AS FAR AS BEING 648 00:25:58,201 --> 00:26:01,671 THIS, AGAIN, ICONIC DISNEY VILLAIN, DO YOU GET ‐‐ CAN YOU 649 00:26:01,671 --> 00:26:03,072 GO TO DISNEYLAND ANY TIME YOU WANT NOW? 650 00:26:03,072 --> 00:26:06,075 [ LAUGHTER ] 651 00:26:06,075 --> 00:26:08,244 >> YOU KNOW ‐‐ THAT IS A GOOD QUESTION. 652 00:26:08,244 --> 00:26:11,915 I AM ‐‐ I DO WANT TO TRY TO GO TO DISNEYLAND SOON. 653 00:26:11,915 --> 00:26:15,318 BECAUSE I DO LOVE DISNEYLAND. I DON'T KNOW WHAT MY, YOU 654 00:26:15,318 --> 00:26:19,689 KNOW ‐‐ HAVING BEEN IN A DISNEY MOVIE PATH TO DISNEYLAND LOOKS 655 00:26:19,689 --> 00:26:21,024 LIKE. BUT I WOULD HOPE. 656 00:26:21,024 --> 00:26:21,424 >> Jimmy: YEAH. 657 00:26:21,424 --> 00:26:22,459 >> THAT THERE'S A ‐‐ YOU KNOW. 658 00:26:22,459 --> 00:26:23,526 >> Jimmy: I WOULD HOPE SO. 659 00:26:23,526 --> 00:26:23,860 >> YES. 660 00:26:23,860 --> 00:26:26,763 >> Jimmy: ALSO, CHILDREN MIGHT HATE YOU WHEN THEY SEE YOU. 661 00:26:26,763 --> 00:26:27,096 [ LAUGHTER ] 662 00:26:27,096 --> 00:26:29,766 >> THAT'S VERY TRUE. AND I DO HAVE THAT BLACK AND 663 00:26:29,766 --> 00:26:33,069 WHITE HAIR IN REAL LIFE, SO THEY'RE GOING TO KNOW IT. 664 00:26:33,069 --> 00:26:33,402 [ LAUGHTER ] 665 00:26:33,402 --> 00:26:34,270 >> Jimmy: YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENS, THOUGH. 666 00:26:34,270 --> 00:26:37,540 THE PARENTS WILL DRAG THEM OVER AND THEY'LL GO, "YOU KNOW WHO 667 00:26:37,540 --> 00:26:40,677 THIS IS?" AND YOU'RE GOING TO ‐‐ 668 00:26:40,677 --> 00:26:41,644 >> YES. 669 00:26:41,644 --> 00:26:45,415 >> Jimmy: THEY'LL SAY WHO IT IS, MAYBE START CRYING OR SOMETHING. 670 00:26:45,415 --> 00:26:46,716 >> THEY'LL BURST INTO TEARS. 671 00:26:46,716 --> 00:26:48,585 >> Jimmy: HOW OLD WERE YOU THE FIRST TIME YOU WENT TO 672 00:26:48,585 --> 00:26:48,918 DISNEYLAND? 673 00:26:48,918 --> 00:26:52,355 >> I WAS ALMOST 3 THE FIRST TIME I WENT TO DISNEYLAND, BECAUSE MY 674 00:26:52,355 --> 00:26:54,290 PARENTS WANTED TO GET ME IN FOR FREE. 675 00:26:54,290 --> 00:26:57,861 IF YOU'RE 2 OR UNDER, YOU GO FOR FREE. 676 00:26:57,861 --> 00:26:59,295 >> Jimmy: OH. THEY WERE HONEST ENOUGH? 677 00:26:59,295 --> 00:27:02,098 MY PARENTS WERE LIKE ‐‐ MY PARENTS WERE CARRYING ME IN WHEN 678 00:27:02,098 --> 00:27:02,431 I WAS 14. 679 00:27:02,431 --> 00:27:05,134 [ LAUGHTER ] 680 00:27:05,134 --> 00:27:10,340 >> HE'S A VERY BIG 2! HE DOESN'T LIKE TO TALK ABOUT IT! 681 00:27:10,340 --> 00:27:13,943 YEAH, THAT IS A GOOD POINT. WHAT, DO YOU BRING THEIR BIRTH 682 00:27:13,943 --> 00:27:17,313 CERTIFICATE OR SOMETHING? BE LIKE, I PROMISE. 683 00:27:17,313 --> 00:27:19,782 >> Jimmy: ESPECIALLY BACK THEN, THERE WAS NO IDENTIFICATION. 684 00:27:19,782 --> 00:27:22,385 IT'S NOT LIKE YOU HAD A LERNER'S PERMIT OR SOMETHING. 685 00:27:22,385 --> 00:27:24,554 JUST TELL ME HOW OLD YOUR KID IS AND EVERYBODY WOULD LIE. 686 00:27:24,554 --> 00:27:25,722 >> YEAH, VERY HONEST. 687 00:27:25,722 --> 00:27:28,791 >> Jimmy: PROBABLY THE MOST LYING IN THE WORLD PROBABLY WENT 688 00:27:28,791 --> 00:27:30,627 ON RIGHT IN THAT LINE AT DISNEYLAND. 689 00:27:30,627 --> 00:27:33,329 >> YES. AND THE WHITE HOUSE. 690 00:27:33,329 --> 00:27:34,297 [ LAUGHTER ] 691 00:27:34,297 --> 00:27:40,403 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 692 00:27:40,403 --> 00:27:43,940 >> Jimmy: BY THE WAY, I THINK YOU MAY HAVE SAID ‐‐ REALLY, 693 00:27:43,940 --> 00:27:47,343 HONESTLY, I'M NOT JOKING AT ALL. I THINK YOU MAY HAVE SET THE 694 00:27:47,343 --> 00:27:51,481 RECORD FOR THE MOST USE OF THE F‐WORD ON NETWORK TELEVISION IN 695 00:27:51,481 --> 00:27:54,250 ONE FIVE‐MINUTE PERIOD. 696 00:27:54,250 --> 00:27:55,018 [ LAUGHTER ] 697 00:27:55,018 --> 00:27:55,351 [ APPLAUSE ] 698 00:27:55,351 --> 00:27:59,489 THERE CAN'T POSSIBLY ‐‐YOU HAVE TO BE NUMBER ONE. 699 00:27:59,489 --> 00:27:59,889 CONGRATULATIONS. 700 00:27:59,889 --> 00:28:01,858 >> FINALLY. THAT'S BEEN A GOAL FOR A LONG 701 00:28:01,858 --> 00:28:02,223 TIME. 702 00:28:02,223 --> 00:28:05,929 >> Jimmy: YEAH, WELL, WE'LL SEND YOU A LITTLE TROPHY, YOU CAN PUT 703 00:28:05,929 --> 00:28:08,898 IT UP NEXT TO THE OSCAR IN HIS UNDERPANTS. 704 00:28:08,898 --> 00:28:09,832 >> PERFECTION. 705 00:28:09,832 --> 00:28:11,534 >> Jimmy: VERY GOOD TO SEE YOU. THE MOVIE IS TERRIFIC. 706 00:28:11,534 --> 00:28:16,306 IT'S CALLED "CRUELLA." IT OPENS IN THEATERS AND DISNEY 707 00:28:16,306 --> 00:28:18,775 PLUS PREMIER ACCESS TOMORROW. EMMA STONE, EVERYBODY. 708 00:28:18,775 --> 00:28:21,210 THANK YOU, EMMA. 709 00:28:21,210 --> 00:28:21,711 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 710 00:28:21,711 --> 00:28:22,211 >> THANK YOU SO MUCH. 711 00:28:22,211 --> 00:28:26,115 >> Jimmy: GOOD TO SEE YOU. BE BACK WITH RORY SCOVEL! 712 00:28:27,517 --> 00:28:29,786 ♪ 713 00:28:29,786 --> 00:28:32,602 >> Jimmy: HI, WELCOME BACK TO THE SHOW. 714 00:28:32,602 --> 00:28:34,404 MUSIC FROM CHLOE MORIONDO IS ON THE WAY. 715 00:28:34,404 --> 00:28:38,842 OUR NEXT GUEST IS A VERY FUNNY STANDUP COMEDIAN AND ACTOR WHO 716 00:28:38,842 --> 00:28:43,547 WAS ONCE NAMED 48th COOLEST DAD IN AMERICA BY FATHERLY.COM. 717 00:28:43,547 --> 00:28:44,715 HIS NEW SHOW WITH ROSE BYRNE IS "PHYSICAL," IT PREMIERES 718 00:28:44,715 --> 00:28:50,454 JUNE 18th ON APPLE TV PLUS. SAY HELLO TO RORY SCOVEL. 719 00:28:50,454 --> 00:28:50,954 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 720 00:28:50,954 --> 00:29:01,698 ♪ 721 00:29:01,698 --> 00:29:02,632 >> Jimmy: HOW ARE YOU DOING? 722 00:29:02,632 --> 00:29:04,101 >> I'M GOOD, HOW ARE YOU? 723 00:29:04,101 --> 00:29:05,969 >> Jimmy: I'M DOING WELL. HOW'S EVERYTHING? 724 00:29:05,969 --> 00:29:07,571 FAMILY GOOD, THE WHOLE DEAL? 725 00:29:07,571 --> 00:29:09,673 >> EVERYTHING'S GOOD. THANK YOU FOR HAVING ME ON THE 726 00:29:09,673 --> 00:29:10,038 SHOW. 727 00:29:10,038 --> 00:29:10,874 >> Jimmy: THANKS FOR BEING HERE. 728 00:29:10,874 --> 00:29:15,879 >> THIS IS WILDLY SURREAL. TO BE HERE, ON ANY DAY, IS CRAZY. 729 00:29:15,879 --> 00:29:19,583 BUT TO BE HERE AFTER THIS PAST YEAR IS BIZARRE. 730 00:29:19,583 --> 00:29:20,684 I FEEL LIKE MAYBE I'M HIGH OR SOMETHING. 731 00:29:20,684 --> 00:29:23,186 [ LAUGHTER ] 732 00:29:23,186 --> 00:29:24,888 >> Jimmy: IS THAT POSSIBLE THAT YOU ARE? 733 00:29:24,888 --> 00:29:27,390 >> I MIGHT HAVE GOT INTO THE GUMMIES! 734 00:29:27,390 --> 00:29:29,893 NOW THAT WE KNOW WHAT'S IN THEM, YOU KNOW. 735 00:29:29,893 --> 00:29:31,294 >> Jimmy: HAVE YOU BEEN DOING STANDUP? 736 00:29:31,294 --> 00:29:34,131 >> I'M BACK OUT THERE. I GOT OUT THERE LAST WEEKEND. 737 00:29:34,131 --> 00:29:38,168 AND I KIND OF THOUGHT THAT, YOU KNOW, GETTING BACK ON STAGE, IT 738 00:29:38,168 --> 00:29:40,737 WOULD BE LIKE RIDING A BIKE, I'D JUST GET OUT THERE AND REMEMBER 739 00:29:40,737 --> 00:29:43,673 THE JOKES. BUT MY BIKE HAS BEEN SHATTERED. 740 00:29:43,673 --> 00:29:44,007 [ LAUGHTER ] 741 00:29:44,007 --> 00:29:45,742 AND I DON'T REMEMBER MOST OF THE THINGS TO TALK ABOUT. 742 00:29:45,742 --> 00:29:49,146 I GOT ON STAGE THINKING, IT'S JUST GOING TO COME BACK TO ME. 743 00:29:49,146 --> 00:29:51,081 I JUST STARED AT PEOPLE. 744 00:29:51,081 --> 00:29:51,414 [ LAUGHTER ] 745 00:29:51,414 --> 00:29:53,950 AND I STARTED SORT OF YELLING AT THEM. BECAUSE I WAS LIKE, YOU'RE 746 00:29:53,950 --> 00:29:57,587 BREATHING ON ME! IF I SAY SOMETHING THAT'S FUNNY 747 00:29:57,587 --> 00:29:59,156 AND YOU LAUGH, YOUR SPIT IS GOING INTO MY MOUTH! 748 00:29:59,156 --> 00:30:02,192 [ LAUGHTER ] 749 00:30:02,192 --> 00:30:04,761 THESE PEOPLE ARE TRYING TO EAT FOOD. 750 00:30:04,761 --> 00:30:06,496 >> Jimmy: WHATEVER YOU WERE THINKING CAME OUT ON THEM? 751 00:30:06,496 --> 00:30:07,497 >> YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT. 752 00:30:07,497 --> 00:30:09,633 >> Jimmy: WERE THEY MORE PATIENT, DID YOU FIND, BECAUSE 753 00:30:09,633 --> 00:30:12,936 THEY WERE HAPPY TO BE OUT, HAEB TO SEE SOMEBODY DOING COMEDY? 754 00:30:12,936 --> 00:30:16,006 >> YOU KNOW, I THOUGHT THAT I WOULD GET UP THERE AND SAY, HEY, 755 00:30:16,006 --> 00:30:20,076 I HAVEN'T ‐‐ THIS IS MY FIRST TIME BACK IN A YEAR. 756 00:30:20,076 --> 00:30:23,780 I THOUGHT MAYBE THE CROWDS WOULD BE LIKE, AWW, YEAH, WE'RE HERE 757 00:30:23,780 --> 00:30:26,016 FOR YOU. BUT IT'S STANDUP, THEY'RE LIKE, 758 00:30:26,016 --> 00:30:27,918 WE DON'T GIVE A [ BLEEP ]. 759 00:30:27,918 --> 00:30:28,251 [ LAUGHTER ] 760 00:30:28,251 --> 00:30:33,790 WE PAID, WE PAID TO BE HERE! TELL ME WHAT YOU'VE NOTICED! 761 00:30:33,790 --> 00:30:34,157 [ LAUGHTER ] 762 00:30:34,157 --> 00:30:38,361 IT'S LIKE, ALL RIGHT, I'M SORRY! YOU'RE READY TO CRY BECAUSE 763 00:30:38,361 --> 00:30:38,962 YOU'RE LIVING IN SHOCK. 764 00:30:38,962 --> 00:30:40,897 >> Jimmy: HOW LONG HAD IT BEEN SINCE YOUR LAST SHOW? 765 00:30:40,897 --> 00:30:45,569 >> MY LAST SHOW WAS MARCH 10th, 2020. PORTLAND, OREGON. 766 00:30:45,569 --> 00:30:50,273 AT THE MISSISSIPPI STUDIOS. I WAS ON A TOUR FOLLOWING THE 767 00:30:50,273 --> 00:30:54,711 BAND TOOL AROUND. AND THEN AFTER THAT SHOW ‐‐ 768 00:30:54,711 --> 00:30:55,712 >> Jimmy: WERE YOU OPENING FOR TOOL? 769 00:30:55,712 --> 00:30:58,148 >> NO, NO. THAT WOULD BE ‐‐ THAT WOULD BE 770 00:30:58,148 --> 00:30:58,481 HORRIBLE. 771 00:30:58,481 --> 00:31:00,584 [ LAUGHTER ] 772 00:31:00,584 --> 00:31:05,121 I WAS DOING SHOWS ON THEIR OFF NIGHTS TO GET TICKET MONEY TO 773 00:31:05,121 --> 00:31:08,491 THEN GO SEE THEIR SHOWS. LUCKILY THE GUITARIST FROM THE 774 00:31:08,491 --> 00:31:13,630 SHOW FOUND OUT THAT ME AND NICK YOUSSEF, ANOTHER COMIC, WERE 775 00:31:13,630 --> 00:31:16,066 DOING THIS TOUR SO HE GAVE US ACCESS TO ALL THEIR STUFF. 776 00:31:16,066 --> 00:31:18,969 >> Jimmy: YOU WERE TOURING LIKE BEHIND, LIKE A CABOOSE OR 777 00:31:18,969 --> 00:31:19,302 SOMETHING? 778 00:31:19,302 --> 00:31:21,838 >> YEAH, WE WOULD GET TO THE CITY A DAY EARLY. 779 00:31:21,838 --> 00:31:25,742 OR WE'D DO OUR SHOW THE DAY AFTER THEY PERFORMED, SO THAT WE 780 00:31:25,742 --> 00:31:26,343 COULD GO TO THEIR CONCERTS. 781 00:31:26,343 --> 00:31:29,112 >> Jimmy: WHAT? 782 00:31:29,112 --> 00:31:29,445 [ LAUGHTER ] 783 00:31:29,445 --> 00:31:32,849 >> ALSO, I'M 40. AND MY WIFE IS LIKE, WAIT, SO 784 00:31:32,849 --> 00:31:35,452 YOU'RE NOT COMING HOME WITH ANY MONEY? 785 00:31:35,452 --> 00:31:35,785 [ LAUGHTER ] 786 00:31:35,785 --> 00:31:38,455 NO! I'M GOING TO GO SEE MY FAVORITE 787 00:31:38,455 --> 00:31:38,820 BAND! 788 00:31:38,820 --> 00:31:40,156 >> Jimmy: OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN. 789 00:31:40,156 --> 00:31:40,657 >> I'M 16! 790 00:31:40,657 --> 00:31:42,025 >> Jimmy: WOW, THAT'S CRAZY. 791 00:31:42,025 --> 00:31:42,359 >> YEAH. 792 00:31:42,359 --> 00:31:45,562 >> Jimmy: ONCE THEY GOT TO KNOW YOU DID THEY LET YOU CARRY 793 00:31:45,562 --> 00:31:46,229 EQUIPMENT OR ANYTHING? 794 00:31:46,229 --> 00:31:50,000 >> THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN AMAZING ‐‐ TO BECOME A ROADIE? 795 00:31:50,000 --> 00:31:50,333 [ LAUGHTER ] 796 00:31:50,333 --> 00:31:50,834 >> Jimmy: MIGHT AS WELL. 797 00:31:50,834 --> 00:31:55,205 >> I LEFT A COMIC WHO WAS DOING OKAY, NOW I'M JUST A ROADIE AND 798 00:31:55,205 --> 00:31:57,707 I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M DOING, I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M DOING. 799 00:31:57,707 --> 00:32:02,612 THEY DID, THEY GIVE US ACCESS TO GO AND WALK AROUND THE ARENAS. 800 00:32:02,612 --> 00:32:05,181 AT ONE POINT ‐‐ THE GUITARIST'S NAME IS ADAM. 801 00:32:05,181 --> 00:32:08,652 HE SAID, BEFORE THE SHOWS IF YOU WANT TO THROW YOUR JACKETS IN 802 00:32:08,652 --> 00:32:10,220 THE DRESSING ROOM AND WATCH THE SHOW, FEEL FREE. 803 00:32:10,220 --> 00:32:14,090 I'M LIKE, THERE'S NO WORLD WHERE I WILL EVER ‐‐ I COULDN'T 804 00:32:14,090 --> 00:32:18,061 IMAGINE COMING IN HERE, LIKE HAVE A GOOD SHOW, ADAM, WE'RE 805 00:32:18,061 --> 00:32:19,062 HERE! WE'RE HERE TO WATCH YOUR BAND! 806 00:32:19,062 --> 00:32:20,830 [ LAUGHTER ] 807 00:32:20,830 --> 00:32:22,866 I WOULD FEEL SO RIDICULOUS. 808 00:32:22,866 --> 00:32:25,235 >> Jimmy: DID YOU EVER COME TO ONE OF YOUR SHOWS? 809 00:32:25,235 --> 00:32:29,472 >> HE DID, TWO OF THEM, WAS SO SUPPORTIVE. LOVED THE SHOWS. 810 00:32:29,472 --> 00:32:35,245 HE GOT TO SEE OUR VENUES ARE REMARKABLY DIFFERENT SIZES. 811 00:32:35,245 --> 00:32:35,578 [ LAUGHTER ] 812 00:32:35,578 --> 00:32:36,613 >> Jimmy: YEAH, I WOULD IMAGINE. 813 00:32:36,613 --> 00:32:38,982 >> YEAH. WE'RE GOING FROM PLAYING COFFEE 814 00:32:38,982 --> 00:32:42,519 SHOPS TO STEPPING INTO THE GRAND CANYON OF A HUGE ARENA. 815 00:32:42,519 --> 00:32:42,852 [ LAUGHTER ] 816 00:32:42,852 --> 00:32:44,020 >> Jimmy: YEAH, HUGE SPOTS. 817 00:32:44,020 --> 00:32:48,024 >> THEY'RE PLAYING HUGE ARENAS. I REMEMBER, HEY, IF YOU EVER 818 00:32:48,024 --> 00:32:51,494 WANT TO COME TO THE SHOW, WE'LL PUT YOU ON THE LIST. 819 00:32:51,494 --> 00:32:53,830 ACTUALLY, IT WOULD HAVE BEEN FUNNIER TO CHARGE HIM. 820 00:32:53,830 --> 00:32:54,163 [ LAUGHTER ] 821 00:32:54,163 --> 00:32:57,734 WE PUT HIM ON THE LIST. AND I WAS LIKE, YEAH, WE DON'T 822 00:32:57,734 --> 00:33:01,371 HAVE TOUR PASSES OR ANYTHING, YOU JUST KIND OF SHOW UP AND THE 823 00:33:01,371 --> 00:33:04,341 DOOR GUY WON'T CARE IF YOU'RE ON THE LIST OR NOT, YOU'LL JUST GET 824 00:33:04,341 --> 00:33:05,308 TO COME IN. 825 00:33:05,308 --> 00:33:05,641 [ LAUGHTER ] 826 00:33:05,641 --> 00:33:07,577 >> Jimmy: RIGHT, RIGHT. 827 00:33:07,577 --> 00:33:09,346 >> IT'S A COMEDY SHOW. YOU SAY, I KNOW THE GUY. 828 00:33:09,346 --> 00:33:10,580 THEY'RE LIKE, I DON'T GIVE A 829 00:33:10,580 --> 00:33:13,516 [ BLEEP ], GET IN OR GET OUT. 830 00:33:13,516 --> 00:33:13,850 [ LAUGHTER ] 831 00:33:13,850 --> 00:33:16,019 WE'VE GOT FOOD AND BEV TO MOVE, THEY DON'T CARE. 832 00:33:16,019 --> 00:33:19,689 >> Jimmy: YOU'RE CURSING AND I FEEL LIKE EMMA STONE CAUSED THAT. 833 00:33:19,689 --> 00:33:21,558 >> I'M HERE TO BREAK THE F‐WORD RECORD. 834 00:33:21,558 --> 00:33:21,891 [ LAUGHTER ] 835 00:33:21,891 --> 00:33:25,362 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 836 00:33:25,362 --> 00:33:28,598 THAT'S RIGHT! BACKSTAGE I WAS LIKE, [ BLEEP ] 837 00:33:28,598 --> 00:33:28,963 THAT! 838 00:33:28,963 --> 00:33:29,297 [ LAUGHTER ] 839 00:33:29,297 --> 00:33:32,669 NOT ON MY [ BLEEP ] WATCH! 840 00:33:32,669 --> 00:33:34,170 >> Jimmy: EMMA HELD THAT RECORD ‐‐ 841 00:33:34,170 --> 00:33:37,507 >> THIS CREATES A VERY REAL FEUD BETWEEN ME, THE GUY NO ONE 842 00:33:37,507 --> 00:33:37,974 KNOWS, AND EMMA STONE. 843 00:33:37,974 --> 00:33:40,043 [ LAUGHTER ] 844 00:33:40,043 --> 00:33:42,512 >> Jimmy: IS THERE A NAME FOR TOOL FANS? 845 00:33:42,512 --> 00:33:44,581 LIKE THE BELIEBERS OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT? 846 00:33:44,581 --> 00:33:45,615 >> IT'S THE SAME. 847 00:33:45,615 --> 00:33:48,051 >> Jimmy: IT'S THE BELIEBERS, REALLY. 848 00:33:48,051 --> 00:33:48,384 [ LAUGHTER ] 849 00:33:48,384 --> 00:33:48,852 >> YEAH. 850 00:33:48,852 --> 00:33:50,387 >> Jimmy: THE MAYNARDS OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT? 851 00:33:50,387 --> 00:33:53,690 >> THE MAYNARDS, YEAH. PROBABLY TOOLHEADS. 852 00:33:53,690 --> 00:33:57,327 I KNOW THEY HAVE TOOL ARMY, WHICH YOU CAN PAY AND BE IN TOOL 853 00:33:57,327 --> 00:33:57,692 ARMY. 854 00:33:57,692 --> 00:33:58,461 >> Jimmy: ARE YOU IN TOOL ARMY? 855 00:33:58,461 --> 00:33:59,262 >> I AM. 856 00:33:59,262 --> 00:33:59,595 [ LAUGHTER ] 857 00:33:59,595 --> 00:34:05,402 IT MEANS I GET ACCESS TO SOME PRETTY SWEET MERCH GRABS EARLY 858 00:34:05,402 --> 00:34:07,837 ON. DO YOU WANT TO GET IN THE MERCH 859 00:34:07,837 --> 00:34:10,073 GAME? ESPECIALLY DURING A PANDEMIC. 860 00:34:10,073 --> 00:34:10,406 [ LAUGHTER ] 861 00:34:10,406 --> 00:34:12,909 >> Jimmy: SOMETHING VERY FUNNY ABOUT A PERSON, A KNOWN 862 00:34:12,909 --> 00:34:15,545 PERSON ‐‐ YOU GOT THIS SHOW NOW ON APPLE TV. 863 00:34:15,545 --> 00:34:17,547 >> YEAH, YEAH. 864 00:34:17,547 --> 00:34:20,316 >> Jimmy: AND WITH ‐‐ WHICH IS SET IN THE '80s. 865 00:34:20,316 --> 00:34:20,717 >> THAT'S RIGHT. 866 00:34:20,717 --> 00:34:23,319 >> Jimmy: WHICH I WOULD IMAGINE YOU WERE A BABY, PROBABLY. 867 00:34:23,319 --> 00:34:26,423 >> I WAS 1 YEARS OLD IN THE REALITY OF THIS SHOW. 868 00:34:26,423 --> 00:34:29,059 >> Jimmy: 1 YEAR, YEAH. YOU DON'T PLAY A 1‐YEAR‐OLD, 869 00:34:29,059 --> 00:34:30,093 THAT WOULD BE RIDICULOUS. 870 00:34:30,093 --> 00:34:33,763 >> I TRY. I GO OUT FOR ALL THE ROLES. 871 00:34:33,763 --> 00:34:34,130 THIS TOWN. 872 00:34:34,130 --> 00:34:35,231 >> Jimmy: ROSE BYRNE IS YOUR ‐‐ 873 00:34:35,231 --> 00:34:35,899 >> MY WIFE. 874 00:34:35,899 --> 00:34:37,233 >> Jimmy: YOUR WIFE ON THE SHOW, YES. 875 00:34:37,233 --> 00:34:41,771 I WATCHED THE FIRST EPISODE. AND YOU KNOW WHAT I LOVE THAT 876 00:34:41,771 --> 00:34:42,939 STUFF. I GET SO INTO THAT. 877 00:34:42,939 --> 00:34:43,306 >> THANK YOU. 878 00:34:43,306 --> 00:34:45,542 >> Jimmy: I THINK WE HAVE A CLIP. 879 00:34:45,542 --> 00:34:46,910 >> AWESOME. 880 00:34:46,910 --> 00:34:47,510 >> Jimmy: TAKE A LOOK HERE. 881 00:34:47,510 --> 00:34:48,144 >> SORRY. 882 00:34:48,144 --> 00:34:52,048 >> OH, NO ‐‐ DON'T BE. I JUST, YOU KNOW, WORRY ABOUT 883 00:34:52,048 --> 00:34:52,649 YOU, THAT'S ALL. 884 00:34:52,649 --> 00:34:54,617 >> I'M GOOD, I'M FINE, IT'S MY STOMACH. 885 00:34:54,617 --> 00:34:57,754 >> EVERYBODY LEFT, THEY ALL TOOK OFF. EXCEPT FOR SIMONE. 886 00:34:57,754 --> 00:35:01,491 WHO IS STILL HERE. AND I'M PRETTY SURE, I'M 887 00:35:01,491 --> 00:35:04,894 ACTUALLY 100% POSITIVE, THAT SHE IS DOWN TO HOOK UP. 888 00:35:04,894 --> 00:35:06,863 EVERYBODY LEFT. THEY SAID GOOD‐BYE. 889 00:35:06,863 --> 00:35:10,600 AND SHE JUST ‐‐ SHE JUST STAYED. SO I WAS THINKING, DO YOU WANT 890 00:35:10,600 --> 00:35:13,236 TO GO AND ‐‐ YOU KNOW. CLOSE THE DEAL? 891 00:35:13,236 --> 00:35:18,208 [ LAUGHTER ] 892 00:35:18,208 --> 00:35:18,708 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 893 00:35:18,708 --> 00:35:19,242 >> THANK YOU, THANK YOU. 894 00:35:19,242 --> 00:35:21,611 >> Jimmy: THERE'S A LOT OF NUDITY IN THE SHOW, INCLUDING 895 00:35:21,611 --> 00:35:23,012 YOU, YOUR OWN. 896 00:35:23,012 --> 00:35:26,082 >> THERE'S A ‐‐ THERE'S A GREAT DEAL OF NUDITY IN THIS SHOW, 897 00:35:26,082 --> 00:35:28,618 WHICH WAS VERY NEW TO ME. I GOT ‐‐ I WAS ABLE TO GET THIS 898 00:35:28,618 --> 00:35:32,055 ROLE DURING THE PANDEMIC. STANDUP WAS GONE. 899 00:35:32,055 --> 00:35:36,259 ALL MY JOBS WERE GONE. THEN THIS ROLE, WHICH I 900 00:35:36,259 --> 00:35:38,628 AUDITIONED FOR, SEEMINGLY FELL FROM THE SKY. 901 00:35:38,628 --> 00:35:42,098 AND THERE WAS GOING TO BE SOME NUDE SCENES. 902 00:35:42,098 --> 00:35:44,234 AND I THINK WHEN YOU DON'T HAVE A JOB, YOU JUST HAVE TO DO THEM. 903 00:35:44,234 --> 00:35:47,704 [ LAUGHTER ] 904 00:35:47,704 --> 00:35:50,573 WHEN YOU HAVE NO JOB AND NO CLOUT, YOU CAN'T GO, CAN WE GET 905 00:35:50,573 --> 00:35:52,575 RID OF THE NUDE SCENES? THEY'RE LIKE, WE'LL GET SOMEONE 906 00:35:52,575 --> 00:35:52,940 ELSE. 907 00:35:52,940 --> 00:35:55,678 [ LAUGHTER ] 908 00:35:55,678 --> 00:35:59,115 SO YEAH, I ‐‐ AND WHEN YOU WATCH THE SHOW, AND I DON'T KNOW ‐‐ I 909 00:35:59,115 --> 00:36:01,684 DON'T KNOW IF VIEWERS ARE GOING TO BE TURNED ON TO WATCH THE 910 00:36:01,684 --> 00:36:03,453 SHOW OR NOT, NOW THAT YOU KNOW I'M NAKED IN THE SHOW. 911 00:36:03,453 --> 00:36:05,889 [ LAUGHTER ] 912 00:36:05,889 --> 00:36:08,391 >> Jimmy: I THINK WE'RE AROUSED. I THINK I SPEAK FOR ALL OF US 913 00:36:08,391 --> 00:36:08,925 WHEN I SAY WE'RE AROUSED. 914 00:36:08,925 --> 00:36:10,059 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 915 00:36:10,059 --> 00:36:15,698 >> AROUSAL, YES. THIS IS WHAT COVID HAS TURNED US 916 00:36:15,698 --> 00:36:16,799 INTO. WE'RE ALL OVERLY SUPPORTIVE OF 917 00:36:16,799 --> 00:36:17,133 EACH OTHER. 918 00:36:17,133 --> 00:36:20,470 [ LAUGHTER ] 919 00:36:20,470 --> 00:36:24,541 WHEN YOU SEE THE SHOW, IF YOU GUYS HAPPEN TO SEE IT, AND YOU 920 00:36:24,541 --> 00:36:30,213 SEE MY NUDE BODY, YOU WILL SEE THAT EVEN A SHOW, KNOWING THAT 921 00:36:30,213 --> 00:36:33,416 AMERICA AND THE WORLD WILL SEE ME NAKED, IS NOT ENOUGH 922 00:36:33,416 --> 00:36:34,217 MOTIVATION TO WORK OUT OR EAT RIGHT. 923 00:36:34,217 --> 00:36:36,386 [ LAUGHTER ] 924 00:36:36,386 --> 00:36:38,021 IN ANY WAY WHATSOEVER. RIGHT? 925 00:36:38,021 --> 00:36:40,557 >> Jimmy: GOOD TO KNOW THAT ABOUT YOURSELF, IT REALLY IS. 926 00:36:40,557 --> 00:36:43,359 I DO WANT TO MENTION NEXT MONTH YOU ARE DOING SOMETHING I THINK 927 00:36:43,359 --> 00:36:45,595 IS VERY INTERESTING ON YOUR YOUTUBE CHANNEL. 928 00:36:45,595 --> 00:36:50,266 YOU DID SIX CONSECUTIVE NIGHTS OF SHOWS, NO MATERIAL, ALL 929 00:36:50,266 --> 00:36:50,600 IMPROVISED. 930 00:36:50,600 --> 00:36:54,804 >> YEAH, I LIKE TO IMPROVISE IN MY STANDUP WHENEVER I CAN. 931 00:36:54,804 --> 00:36:57,707 AND I DECIDED I WANTED TO PUT SOME SHOWS TOGETHER WHERE THAT'S 932 00:36:57,707 --> 00:37:00,977 ALL I WAS GOING TO DO. AND I TOLD A BUDDY THAT AND HE 933 00:37:00,977 --> 00:37:04,447 WAS LIKE, OH, YOU SHOULD GET SOME CAMERAS AND SHOOT THAT FOR 934 00:37:04,447 --> 00:37:06,316 A DOCUMENTARY. AND I AS LIKE, YEAH, GREAT, 935 00:37:06,316 --> 00:37:09,285 I'LL DO IT. SO WE DID, WE SHOT ALL SIX 936 00:37:09,285 --> 00:37:13,590 EPISODES AND WE PUT IT INTO SORT OF A HYBRID BETWEEN A SPECIAL 937 00:37:13,590 --> 00:37:17,093 AND A DOCUMENTARY. I DID THAT WITH MY BUDDY SCOTT 938 00:37:17,093 --> 00:37:17,426 MORAN. 939 00:37:17,426 --> 00:37:19,495 >> Jimmy: VERY GOOD. RORY SCOVEL. 940 00:37:19,495 --> 00:37:22,899 "PHYSICAL" PREMIERS JUNE 18th ON APPLE TV PLUS. 941 00:37:22,899 --> 00:37:27,604 GO TO RORY'S YOUTUBE CHANNEL FOR SIX NIGHTS OF UNWRITTEN 942 00:37:27,604 --> 00:37:27,969 MATERIAL. 943 00:37:27,969 --> 00:37:29,072 >> JUNE 24th, YEAH. 944 00:37:29,072 --> 00:37:33,376 >> Jimmy: WE'LL BE BACK WITH CHLOE MORIONDO! 945 00:37:37,373 --> 00:37:40,977 >> Jimmy: THIS IS HER ALBUM, IT'S CALLED "BLOOD BUNNY." 946 00:37:40,977 --> 00:37:43,746 WITH THE SONG "BODYBAG," FROM DETROIT, MICHIGAN, 947 00:37:43,746 --> 00:37:47,950 CHLOE MORIONDO! 948 00:37:47,950 --> 00:37:59,862 ♪ 949 00:37:59,862 --> 00:38:02,198 ♪ I DON'T KNOW WHERE EXACTLY 950 00:38:02,198 --> 00:38:06,736 YOU EXPECT MY HEAD TO GO WHEN YOU LOOK AT ME 951 00:38:06,736 --> 00:38:10,239 IT'S LIKE I LOSE CONTROL ♪ 952 00:38:10,239 --> 00:38:11,474 ♪ YOU KNOW THAT 953 00:38:11,474 --> 00:38:14,444 YOU'RE TO BLAME WHEN YOU SAY MY NAME 954 00:38:14,444 --> 00:38:17,447 WHEN YOU SAY MY NAME YEA ♪ 955 00:38:17,447 --> 00:38:17,780 ♪ LOOK AT YOU 956 00:38:17,780 --> 00:38:22,452 WALKING ALL AROUND JUST ACTING LIKE YOU DO ♪ 957 00:38:22,452 --> 00:38:23,920 ♪ MAKING EVERYONE THINK 958 00:38:23,920 --> 00:38:27,924 YOU DON'T HAVE A CLUE BUT I CAN SEE IT 959 00:38:27,924 --> 00:38:32,161 YEA I KNOW YOUR SECRET ♪ 960 00:38:32,161 --> 00:38:33,930 ♪ DON'T KNOW IF I HATE YOU 961 00:38:33,930 --> 00:38:37,934 OR IF I WANNA DATE YOU PUT YOU IN A BODY BAG 962 00:38:37,934 --> 00:38:41,037 INSTEAD OF MY BED ♪ 963 00:38:41,037 --> 00:38:43,272 ♪ I DON'T WANNA LIKE YOU 964 00:38:43,272 --> 00:38:47,977 I JUST WANNA TIE YOU UP AND KEEP YOU IN A CAGE AND 965 00:38:47,977 --> 00:38:53,349 WATCH YOU SLEEP FOR AGES ♪ 966 00:38:53,349 --> 00:38:57,987 ♪ 967 00:38:57,987 --> 00:38:59,789 ♪ I WANNA KEEP YOU IN A CAGE AND 968 00:38:59,789 --> 00:39:01,457 WATCH YOU SLEEP ♪ 969 00:39:01,457 --> 00:39:03,993 ♪ 970 00:39:03,993 --> 00:39:06,062 ♪ I WANNA KEEP YOU IN A CAGE AND 971 00:39:06,062 --> 00:39:07,964 WATCH YOU SLEEP FOR AGES ♪ 972 00:39:07,964 --> 00:39:09,198 ♪ FEELS LIKE I'M GONNA DIE 973 00:39:09,198 --> 00:39:12,435 WHENEVER YOU GET CLOSE TO ME IT'S WAY TOO HOT IN MICHIGAN ♪ 974 00:39:12,435 --> 00:39:13,469 ♪ I'M CHANGING 975 00:39:13,469 --> 00:39:20,243 THE SUBJECT AGAIN MY HEART IS MELTING 976 00:39:20,243 --> 00:39:23,446 AND MY HANDS ARE WEAK ♪ 977 00:39:23,446 --> 00:39:24,714 ♪ I COULD CRY 978 00:39:24,714 --> 00:39:27,950 WHEN I HEAR YOU SPEAK BUT THAT JUST MAKES ME ANGRY ♪ 979 00:39:27,950 --> 00:39:28,951 ♪ WANNA KISS YOU 980 00:39:28,951 --> 00:39:33,923 ON YOUR CHEEKS BUT I ALSO WANNA PUNCH YOUR TEETH ♪ 981 00:39:33,923 --> 00:39:38,995 ♪ I JUST DON'T GET IT 982 00:39:38,995 --> 00:39:40,496 I JUST DON'T KNOW ♪ 983 00:39:40,496 --> 00:39:43,900 ♪ DON'T KNOW IF I HATE YOU 984 00:39:43,900 --> 00:39:45,468 OR IF I WANNA DATE YOU PUT YOU IN A BODY BAG 985 00:39:45,468 --> 00:39:48,504 INSTEAD OF MY BED ♪ 986 00:39:48,504 --> 00:39:51,507 ♪ I DON'T WANNA LIKE YOU 987 00:39:51,507 --> 00:39:55,478 I JUST WANNA TIE YOU UP AND KEEP YOU IN A CAGE AND 988 00:39:55,478 --> 00:39:59,282 WATCH YOU SLEEP FOR AGES ♪ 989 00:39:59,282 --> 00:40:01,984 ♪ 990 00:40:01,984 --> 00:40:03,219 ♪ I WANNA KEEP YOU 991 00:40:03,219 --> 00:40:04,453 IN A CAGE AND WATCH 992 00:40:04,453 --> 00:40:12,461 YOU SLEEP FOR AGES ♪ 993 00:40:12,461 --> 00:40:15,665 ♪ 994 00:40:20,624 --> 00:40:23,093 >> Jimmy: I WANT TO THANK EMMA STONE, RORY SCOVEL, 995 00:40:23,093 --> 00:40:27,464 CHLOE MORIONDO, JAMES ADOMIAN, AND GOVERNOR GAVIN NEWSOM. 996 00:40:27,464 --> 00:40:30,267 THANK YOU, GOVERNOR. 997 00:40:30,267 --> 00:40:30,767 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 998 00:40:30,767 --> 00:40:31,801 REALLY CARRYING THE LOAD HERE, WE APPRECIATE IT. 999 00:40:31,801 --> 00:40:35,572 APOLOGIES TO MATT DAMON. "NIGHTLINE" IS NEXT. 1000 00:40:35,572 --> 00:40:39,072 THANK YOU FOR WATCHING. GOOD NIGHT, EVERYBODY!