>> dicky: From hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live."
tonight, kevin james. Kat dennings.
And music from mammoth wvh. And now, jimmy kimmel!
[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: Hi, there.
I'm jimmy, I'm the host of the show.
Thank you. Thanks for watching and thanks
for joining us after day three of trumpeachment number two.
It's kind of like“the empire strikes back”
we already know how it ends, but we're watching it anyway.
Democrats could produce a video of trump looking straight into
camera saying“i, donald trump, hereby incite the insurrection
of violence" and most of the republican senators would still
be like, where's the proof? We didn't see the proof.
In order to win a conviction, democrats have to flip a lot of
senators. Let's break it down.
Put all the republican senators on the wall.
We'll start by assuming that all six republicans who voted that
the trial was constitutional will vote to impeach.
It's not likely, but let's assume that.
Romney, toomey, collins, cassidy, murkowski, and sasse go
that way, put them on the side. Now we know that most of these
people are scared that if they vote to convict, a big chunk of
their voters back home will turn on them.
They saw what the mob did to mike pence.
They're worried they'll get primaried and lose their seats.
So let's remove anyone up for re-election in 2022.
Let's also remove anyone who's up for re-election in 2024, all
right? Now let's get rid of the
senators who voted to overturn the election.
We know there's not a chance they'll do the right thing.
And we'll also say goodbye to lindsey graham because --
[ laughter ] [ applause ]
his secrets are apparently too dark to overcome.
That leaves three senators who say they plan to retire at the
end of their terms, 12 republicans who won't be up
for re-election until 2026, and the 6 who voted yea on day one.
This is the group that can make a difference right here.
They have the power. Most of them are lost causes.
Tom cotton, bill hagerty, they would eat the hair out of donald
trump's shower drain. [ laughter ]
but a few of them, who knows? Maybe three ghosts will visit
them in the middle of the night tonight.
So if you see one of your senators here, if you live in
that state, maybe give them a call, an email or a tweet, tell
them what you think. Here's the thing.
If americans cared as much about america as we do about britney
spears, this would be a really great place to live.
[ cheers and applause ] I mean, come on.
If spike lee stood outside and encouraged people to storm the
capitol, he'd be in prison right now, okay?
The democrats made an excellent case.
So much so, trump's lawyers are now only planning to use three
of the 16 hours they're allotted to rebut.
Maybe they realized he's only planning to pay them for three
of the hours. [ laughter ]
one of trump's lawyers left during the middle of the hearing
today, left to go do an interview with fox news.
O.J. Must be laughing his ass off.
[ laughter ] fox news is obviously aware of
how rock solid and damaging the case against trump is, so they
made the decision to stop covering the whole thing.
Instead, they're turning the faux outrage button up to 11 to
try to scream this away. >> this is political theater
that will go nowhere. >> I think most republicans
found the presentation by the house managers offensive.
>> it became very redundant too. It was like the same thing, the
same person. >> we have a rogue impeachment.
>> impeachment? >> a rogue house.
>> the whole thing is ridiculous.
>> a rogue senate. >> they are literally impeaching
a president who isn't even the president anymore.
>> a role trying. >> they're yelling a the someone
who's already left the room. >> they're all excited to be
able to grandstand. >> this is a kangaroo
proceeding. >> all this lawyer talk is
baloney. >> people are entitled to be
idiots. The whole then is just
political. >> emotional, political theater.
>> more political theater. >> political theater.
>> the sham impeachment part
deux is unconstitutional. >> the whole thing is a sham.
>> we should take crime tape and wrap it around the whole damn
capitol building. >> it's a nothing burger.
>> jimmy: Yeah. It's more like a whopper, a
double whopper with a biggy size fries.
[ applause ] trump's argument is basically,
yes, maybe I did shout "fire" in a crowded theater, but the
people trampling each other were acting on their own!
And these people who acted on their own, I wonder if you can
use stupidity as a defense? You can plead insanity, why not?
These dopes, not only do they believe this orange imbecile,
not only did they break the law violently forcing their way into
a federal building, many if not most of them posted pictures of
themselves at the scene of the crime!
>> top supporters who had broken into the capitol were taking
selfies, streaming live videos, and posing.
In fact, they wanted the president to know, this is me.
In fact, you can see the person wrote on his own posting "this
is me." [ laughter ]
>> jimmy: They should print that out and hang it on the wall of
his cell. And it's not just a small
handful of nuts. 18% of americans who have heard
of qanon believe its claims are at least somewhat accurate.
And that number would be a lot higher if the jews weren't
eliminating the ones who know the truth with their space
laser. [ laughter ]
[ applause ] 18%.
Almost 1 in 5 americans thinks anderson cooper eats toddler
lasagna. [ laughter ]
that's like if you saw five pigeons on the street.
Four of them are normal, but then there is this one.
Who's staring deeply into his ipad, waiting for word from the
land of fakebelieve. That's q right there.
[ applause ] the new theory going around the
q morning zoo is that trump will be re-inaugurated on March 4th,
which is the date they used to inaugurate presidents in the old
days. That's the crazy part.
The funny part is the trump hotel in washington raised their
prices for that day. [ laughter ]
for real. This man, he will miss no
opportunity to fleece the sheep who believe in him.
He can't help himself! It's like he thinks they're an
atm. By the way, if q had any sense
of humor he would have made that date April 1st.
[ laughter ] I bet none of them would have
gotten it. [ applause ]
guillermo, are you ready for valentine's day?
>> guillermo: I'm ready. >> jimmy: In what way?
>> guillermo: I ordered flowers for my wife and I'm going to
make her breakfast on Sunday. >> jimmy: Very good.
My wife and I are doing something, we're having a
romantic weekend in the garage. [ laughter ]
there are only three more days until you drive frantically to
rite-aid to see if they have any heart-shaped balloons left.
But if you're looking to spend a little more, louis vuitton has
something special. A sweater that is covered in
puppets. [ laughter ]
it looks like, I don't know, something your crazy aunt sandy
might make. How about the poor guy who had
to wear this? Have you ever seen a sadder
model than this one? He looks like he's been tarred
and muppeted. [ laughter ]
the sweater goes for about $8,000.
Which is a small price to pay for something that will get you
mauled outside a kindergarten. [ laughter ]
and if the sweater is too much, here's another idea for that
special something. >> valentine's day is around the
corner. And after the year we've had,
it's clear who your sweetheart is.
Not your spouse. Not your girlfriend.
Not even your kids. Your phone.
Your phone is always there for you.
At the dentist. At the crosswalk.
On the toilet. Or when you need a little porn
at the drugstore. This valentine's day, get a
naughty gift for that special gadget in your life.
Verizon's secret. >> you're the only one who loves
me. [ cheers and applause ]
>> jimmy: Wow. Let me tell you something.
I just want to -- who knew craig fink ankle, one of our
producers, was such a talented actor?
[ cheers and applause ] congratulations.
Craig, stand up. [ cheers and applause ]
we would throw flowers at you right now, but they're like 9
bucks apiece. [ laughter ]
since we are about to embark on a weekend of love, we went
out onto the street here in l.A. To ask couples about their
relationships. And because everyone we talked
to was wearing a mask, we were able to swap voices from one
mouth to the other in a special valentine's day edition of
“masking questions” >> what are some of your biggest
turn-ons? >> all right, so right now I'm
pretty easy. Like, you know, like when you're
pregnant, you want to have sex more?
Like that's a thing. >> let me ask you this.
Mckenzie, what are some of your turn-ons?
>> anything that accentuates the butt is a big one for me.
I don't know, it's like a cave man button.
Anything that accentuates the butt does it for me.
>> what is your go-to mood for paige?
>> I'll put on something cute, something sexy, probably.
And then, you know, make sure my nails are done.
>> what are some of your turn-ons, page?
>> my turn-ons are, you know, soft voice.
You know, a little leg showing. Stuff like that.
>> what are some no-noes in the bedroom?
>> as a brazilian, anything goes.
>> what are some no-noes for you in the bedroom?
>> I'm not taking my clothes off.
That's a no-no. >> who is your hall pass?
>> I would have -- I'll have to go with the holly to the berry.
Holly berry, you know. >> who is your celebrity crush,
your hall pass, your one freebie?
>> I would say morris chestnut. >> jocelyn, any no-nos in the
bedroom? >> I can't put it in the butt.
>> nathan, any no-noes in the bedroom?
>> the butt. >> marcos, how do you get
kristin in the mood, how do you seduce her?
>> you know, I have some little outfits that I like to put on.
>> kristin, how do you get marco in the mood?
>> eh -- it depends by the season.
But usually start with the nice thing and a glass of wine.
>> marco, who is your celebrity crush?
Your hall pass? >> leonardo dicaprio.
>> what do you like about him? >> it starts from the head and
goes to the toes. Honestly, all of it.
>> kristin, who is your freebie? >> I start with pamela anderson,
I guess, yes. I'm 81, from the old-school, I
would say, yes. I like very much the breast.
For sure the eyes. >> what would be a great
valentine's day for you? >> a great valentine's?
Sleep, some wine and sleep. >> what about you?
>> yeah, turn it up, some candy, steak, and lobster.
There it is. >> what's the secret to a good
relationship? >> yeah, I mean, to be very
honest, just shut the [ bleep ] up.
And shut the [ bleep ] up. >> that's your answer?
>> yeah, I mean, not too much talking, just shut the [ bleep ]
up. >> oh my gosh.
[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: Well.
Maybe he should have taken his own advice.
All right. And one more thing before we
forge ahead. It's Thursday night, which means
it's time to bleep and blur the big tv moments of the week
whether they need it or not. It's“this week in unnecessary
censorship." >> they claim that donald trump
incited this insurrection on January 6th when he said things
like, oh [ bleep ] like hell. >> but [ bleep ] this person's
conduct, but [ bleep ] the behavior, but [ bleep ] the
statements -- >> it made the capitol
[ bleep ], [ bleep ], [ bleep ]. >> I remember watching warren
moon [ bleep ] my father at the university of washington.
>> they [ bleep ]ed us pretty good.
The worst thing I've been [ bleep ]ed in a long time.
>> is it easier or harder when the [ bleep ] is actually a
little bit smaller? >> oh, yeah, for sure.
If you have a small [ bleep ], whoo, may just blow away with
all that wind we got out there. >> check this [ bleep ] out.
>> president clinton and I used to talk about who [ bleep ]ed
the most presidents. He's probably [ bleep ]ed more
than I but I have a lot of them. >> you guys, [ bleep ] you all.
[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: We have a good show
for you tonight. Kat dennings is with us.
We've got music from mammoth wvh.
And we'll be right back with kevin james.
So stick around! [ cheers and applause ]
>> jimmy: Hi, welcome back to the show.
Tonight from“wandavisio” on disney plus, kat dennings is
with us. [ cheers and applause ]
then, later a band led by wolfgang van halen.
Their self-titled album comes out in June.
Making their television debut with a song about his dad,
mammoth wvh. [ cheers and applause ]
next week on the show our guests will include jodie foster, kate
hudson, jason bateman, bette midler, kelly marie tran,
rosamund pike, eiza gonzalez. We'll have music from florida
georgia line, nav featuring gunna, black pumas, and
evanescence so please join us for that.
Our first guest is a very funny man you know from many beloved
movies and shows. His new one is called“the
crew” it premieres Monday on netflix.
Please welcome kevin james. [ cheers and applause ]
hi, kevin, hi, jimmy? >> jimmy: How's it going?
>> doing great, how are you? >> jimmy: Doing good.
I haven't seen you in a very long time, it's been quite a
while, right? >> jimmy: It's been a really
long time. You got a new hat since I last
saw you? [ laughter ]
>> I did, I did. It's the only one too, by the
way. >> jimmy: You're in long island
right now? >> no, now in florida right now.
The snowstorm, I'm hanging down here a little bit.
>> jimmy: I gotcha. How's it been going long
down-wise? It's nice to avoid the snow but
have you been -- are you okay? You seem like a gregarious guy
who might not love staying indoors.
>> I didn't love it in the beginning but I said, I'm going
to make something of this, I'm going to be the one guy who
comes out of quarantine better than I went in.
That was very important to me. For a while.
[ laughter ] then I -- I -- I rocketed up
like 30 pounds. [ laughter ]
it got away from me. I couldn't.
It was -- it was so brutal. So I just started using the
lockdown to my advantage, you know.
I would start looking at things and saying, how can we benefit
from this? Then I would say, well, there
are things that you can't do. Like I told everybody, I want to
go to the gym, but it felt like it was too risky.
[ laughter ] >> jimmy: Uh-huh.
I have the same feeling. >> right?
>> jimmy: It's very -- yeah, very selfless of you, really.
[ laughter ] some would call you a hero.
>> some. You know.
But I didn't want to -- I didn't want to infect anybody else.
Also worked to my advantage with who is in our bubble, you know.
>> jimmy: Oh, yeah. Who is in your bubble?
>> well, the pizza delivery, that guy.
[ laughter ] >> jimmy: He's part of the
bubble. >> he became my wife's --
>> jimmy: What's his name? >> his name is leroy.
>> jimmy: Leroy, okay. >> he's the best, he's the best
guy. He honestly is.
Italian guy. He's amazing.
He's just fantastic. >> jimmy: And who else is in the
bubble with you? >> we got a few people in the
bubble. The cable repair guy's in the
bubble. [ laughter ]
he's allowed. White friends are not allowed in
the bubble. [ laughter ]
we just established it early. It wasn't me, just how it worked
out. >> jimmy: Kevin, when is the
last time you wore clothing that needed to be dry cleaned?
>> yeah, that's -- that's how you judge it every day, right?
You go, okay, is this stain going to be seen on a zoom call?
You know? You just position yourself.
It was pretty bad. Especially in quarantine.
Because I -- I just -- you just struggle for comfort.
You know, I was wearing bike shorts all around the house.
[ laughter ] that's all I would wear.
They're comfortable to me. That evolved into sports
underwear. [ laughter ]
I would just wear sports underwear around.
Then we were like in half lockdown where it was not always
locked down, so you could go out a little bit.
>> jimmy: Yeah. >> I would totally forget.
I'd be at lowe's shopping in my sports -- in my underwear,
basically. [ laughter ]
>> jimmy: I think that's allowed now.
I think you can. Particularly lowe's is where
they're allowing that. >> yeah.
>> jimmy: Are you like a guy who will go on amazon or whatever
and buy a bunch of stuff? >> that's -- I do.
And that was the one day I would look forward to, when they --
that was like the ice cream man coming.
That was the one day I would run out -- if they played music,
they didn't even have to stop at the house, I'd chase them down.
[ laughter ] >> jimmy: What kind of stuff do
you buy, are you looking for? Is there -- just anything?
Or specific stuff? >> it is, it's just -- well,
it's -- they're not big things, you know.
You know, that's the other thing too, with amazon.
Successful as they are, they really need to work on their
package-to-item ratio. >> jimmy: Yes.
>> every time I get a toothbrush, the kids get a new
fort. [ laughter ]
mass box things. They go through stuff.
>> jimmy: Yeah, it's like the employees are going, well, it's
not my problem. >> right.
That's the other thing too. They got so busy that -- I think
they ran out of trucks with amazon.
And they would have guys -- I don't know if you ever got --
did you get delivery from the guy in the honda accord?
[ laughter ] bringing it from inside the
trunk? >> jimmy: Yes, it's a weird
thing, right? >> it's very weird.
>> jimmy: You think they're coming to take something, and
they're actually there to give you something.
>> yes. I'm standing back waiting for
him. He pops the trunk, he moves a
rusty towel, a tire iron. [ laughter ]
and there's my mouthwash. >> jimmy: What are your plans
for valentine's day? Are you going to do anything?
>> no. >> jimmy: No.
>> no, I don't -- I established it early on.
I don't want to tell everybody because people will start doing
it. I avoid craziness of valentine's
day, I always take my wife out on the 15th.
>> jimmy: Oh. >> I always go the day after.
Reservations, no problem. You get in, it's not that
crowded. You go wherever you want.
We've done this for many, many years because that's the
romantic I am. >> jimmy: That is a very bright
idea. Because you do it beforehand,
you're still going to run into valentine's traffic.
But once valentine's day hits, it's over, right?
>> it's done. It's a ghost town.
And you can, yeah, you get what you want, it's great.
>> jimmy: I like that a lot. You are --
>> don't do it, though. Don't do it.
[ laughter ] >> jimmy: I'll spearhead it on
the west coast here. Tell me about this youtube
channel you have. Because it's super popular.
And you've got some very funny stuff on there.
I want to show one of the things you do.
You do this character, the sound guy, right?
>> oh, yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: The idea is you are
the sound guy on famous movies. Let's take a look at one of
these. >> contractor, grand central
station, take 1. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
No, no, sir. It's all right, just trying to
get some wild sound. >> what the hell you doing out
here, fred? >> trying to get sound, will,
just wild sound -- >> what the hell --
>> I've got to start from scratch, start over.
>> no! >> yes.
[ applause ] >> jimmy: I would watch a whole
movie like that. >> yeah.
It was -- guys I was quarantined with, the kanin family --
>> jimmy: Wait a minute, you were quarantined with a family?
>> yes. >> jimmy: That wasn't your own?
>> it was not my own. The kanins, the greatest family,
such a sweet family. We just started this youtube
channel right before lockdown. Then they stayed with me during
lockdown. And we just created these short
films and came up with that one. >> jimmy: How many people are in
the family? >> I still don't know.
[ laughter ] I swear I don't know.
There's so many of them. Each day there's a new one,
younger than the next. >> jimmy: Are we talking
about -- like is grandma there with them?
How extended is it? >> no.
It was -- not in the lockdown. The lockdown, I had about eight,
you know. >> jimmy: Eight!
>> yes. Yes.
>> jimmy: An eight-member family is working together?
>> yes. And they're amazing.
Oh, they're amazing how they work together.
They're just very sweet to each other.
I couldn't believe it. Because, you know.
One's like the director, one edits, one does the lighting,
the cinematography -- it's crazy how they work together.
>> jimmy: Where did they stay? >> well, they were at a -- like
a -- an airbnb right near my house.
>> jimmy: Uh-huh. >> and then they were just --
would kind of stay at my house. When lockdown got really bad, we
had rules, you can't go anywhere, this and that.
So pizza came -- they basically just lived with me and I used
them for everything. Honestly, I would just work into
the shorts. You know what would make this
sketch better? If the paint on the house was a
little different color? [ laughter and applause.
>> jimmy: Have they gone? Are they still with you?
>> I think some are -- if I check my house, I think some are
still here. [ laughter ]
>> jimmy: Who is your favorite member of the kanin family?
>> gosh, I think it would be pat.
Pat's crazy, a big drinker, a big eater, he's a big -- he's a
wild guy. He doesn't care.
Walks around, no shoes everywhere.
He's one of those guys. Crazy head of hair.
Just a nut, nutbag. >> jimmy: Kevin, there is really
a kanin family, or do you have a lot of imaginary friends?
>> I'm hoping they're not in my head.
[ laughter ] I think I spent quarantine with
a kanif family, otherwise I'm going crazy.
>> jimmy: Well, I think it could be either, easily.
When we come back, we'll look at a clip from kevin's new show
"the crew" on netflix. Kevin james is with us, be right
>>> we're a team. Just because he's behind the
wheel, you can't pin this on him.
Debris on the track, took out two tires.
>> richmond? >> richmond wasn't his fault.
In his defense, he saw a cloud that looked like abraham
lincoln. I mean, it was -- yeah.
[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: That is kevin james in
"the crew." it premieres Monday on netflix.
Who's your costar there who did this?
>> oh, freddie stroma, atmosphere he's great.
>> jimmy: Did he surprise you with the hat there?
>> he did, I almost broke there. >> jimmy: I could see that.
>> such an idiot. >> jimmy: You play the crew
chief for a nascar team. Are you a nascar fan?
>> growing up, I loved richard petty.
But I never knew much about -- beyond that, I didn't know much
about it. I watched on it wide world of
sports, then long island kid, you're not exposed to nascar.
>> jimmy: Right, yeah. >> me and sandler did press for
a couple movies. We did the "gentlemen, start
your engines" at a couple of these.
>> jimmy: I was thinking about that.
You and adam. I think -- many believe you were
responsible for the greatest "gentlemen, start your engines"
of all time. ♪ ahh
♪ yeah ♪ oh yeah
engines! [ cheers and applause ]
>> jimmy: Lesser men would not have survived that.
>> almost went down, by the way, got tangled up in the mic cord.
[ laughter ] >> jimmy: So kevin, since you're
playing a crew chief, I thought it might be fun to test your
knowledge of automobile parts. >> oh, I'm very good now.
>> jimmy: You are? Okay, good.
>> yes. Now I am.
>> jimmy: All right, good, all right.
Okay, here we go. We gave this a great title, too.
It's called "name that part!" >> wow.
Exciting. >> jimmy: All right, kevin?
>> yeah? >> jimmy: Name this part.
>> okay, that's -- that's clearly an exhaust panel --
it's -- it's actually the -- the cyndilator between the exhaust
and the pipe -- >> jimmy: Kevin, this is a
muffler. >> yeah, that's what I said,
exhaust. Exhaust muffler.
>> jimmy: I thought I was starting off easy.
Here we go. The next part is -- name that
part. >> that's it, that's a drive
shaft, yeah. >> jimmy: You know what?
It's a cam shaft, but that was close enough, I think we give
kevin credit for that. [ cheers and applause ]
>> by the way, sometimes the people in the west, they call it
cam. The others call it drive.
>> jimmy: Oh, it's a regional thing.
>> yes. >> jimmy: All right.
Kevin james, name that part. >> that's a -- it's obviously a
shock absorber. You know that.
But it's also a -- yeah, it's a hydraulic.
The hydraulic -- hydraulic -- a hydraulic base.
>> jimmy: You know, it's kind of like a shock absorber.
It is a strut. But we're going to give you
credit for that as well, kevin. [ cheers and applause ]
>> jimmy: All right. You're doing great so far.
I should have got a tetanus shot.
Okay, here we go. >> okay, see, the first part had
a baby, and this is the baby one.
This is the baby size. [ laughter ]
that's all it is, just its little baby.
It's the same thing. That's actually -- it's part of
a muffler that goes to the caminator.
>> jimmy: This one sounds more complicated than it looks, this
is a catalytic krerter. >> yes, yes.
>> jimmy: So you do not get credit for that.
>> whoa, whoa -- >>.
>> jimmy: All right? >> I thought it converted from a
muffler. [ laughter ]
>> jimmy: All right, look at this sculpture.
>> that is a saxophone. [ laughter ]
good question, good question. >> jimmy: That is either -- you
can call it a header or an exhaust manifold.
>> okay. I'll call it either.
>> jimmy: All right. And finally, oh my goodness, one
more. Name this part.
>> that's a spindle drive. Spindle drive with a side
component. [ laughter ]
>> jimmy: This is actually a cow milking cluster.
[ laughter ] >> oh, man.
That was the trick one. >> jimmy: Yeah.
Guillermo, take off your shirt, we'll show kevin how it works.
>> guillermo: No, no, no. >> jimmy: Kevin, you know what,
it doesn't matter u, you're an actor, you don't have to do
anything on the track. >> I don't, I don't.
>> jimmy: It's great to see you. "the crew" premieres Monday on
netflix. Kevin james, everybody.
>> thanks, guys! >> jimmy: We'll be back with kat
dennings. [ cheers and applause ]
♪ >> jimmy: Welcome back.
We have music from mammoth wvh on the way.
After eight thorless years, our next guest returned to the mcu
in the show "the wandavision," which you can see fridays on
disney plus. Please welcome kat dennings.
Hello, kat. >> hello!
So nice to see you, how are you? >> jimmy: Doing pretty good, how
are you? >> good, just in my house.
>> jimmy: Here in l.A., I assume?
>> yes. >> jimmy: Where are you from
originally? >> I'm from pennsylvania
originally. >> jimmy: Pennsylvania.
What part of pennsylvania? >> well, a wooded area that was
much more wooded when I was there, but -- it's called
winwood, for anyone in the know. Very exciting.
>> jimmy: What happened, when you left they got angry and
chopped down all the trees? >> it was just -- it was a
beautiful -- it was more like wooded and there was a horse
farm nearby. I actually lived in a very old,
very old house that was built in 1694.
>> jimmy: 1694? We had houses here in 1694?
[ laughter ] >> not here we did.
>> jimmy: Weren't there dinosaurs in 1694?
[ laughter ] >> yeah, it was -- it was an
old -- it was like the first house in the township.
So it had, like, a plaque on it. It was a historical, like,
landmark. >> jimmy: Wow, wow.
That's pretty cool. My house growing up in vegas was
a crack house for a little while.
[ laughter ] >> did it have a plaque?
>> jimmy: Just crack, no plaque. [ laughter ]
>> okay, that's almost as good. >> jimmy: Wow, it had a plaque
on it. Would strangers come and want to
take pictures and stuff like that?
>> actually, the historical society would do tours through
our home. And sometimes like a little car
filled with sweet old ladies would roll up, and like they'd
all get out like little booklets and walk past me eating my corn
flakes in the kitchen with my jansport backpack.
When we lived there, they would just walk through as if it were
a museum, you know. >> jimmy: Yeah.
>> but it was our family house. >> jimmy: Is that kind of the
deal when you buy a house that's like -- I assume some sort of
historical landmark, you have to agree to let old ladies in there
sometimes? >> I think my mom just loved
that part of it. >> jimmy: Oh.
>> she loves that stuff. When you buy something with a
plaque on it, apparently, you can't really change anything
about it. >> jimmy: Right.
>> you can't knock any walls down or do anything.
She was into this and kept it nice and pristine.
>> jimmy: Was everything tiny? Because people were smaller back
then. I guess you were smaller back
then. >> I was a tiny person, yes.
I couldn't tell you. But there were dangerous winding
staircases that, you know, seemed not to code.
>> jimmy: Not to code, yeah. There were ghosts or anything?
>> yeah. >> jimmy: Oh there were ghosts?
>> a haunted house. It was haunted as hell.
[ laughter ] >> jimmy: Did you ever see one?
>> um -- well, remember I'm 7. 7 to 15 is when I lived there,
basically. So yeah, I saw some stuff.
There were some intense experiences there.
You know, the classic stuff. Like lights going on and off.
>> jimmy: Right. >> things kind of going missing
and showing up weird places. And the cold.
And I did see some -- I don't want to seem like an insane
person on television right now. >> jimmy: Right.
[ laughter ] well, you don't seem insane,
because when a house is built in 1694, it could be that your
electrical panels were very old, and maybe it was heated by coal
or something like that. So --
>> yeah, there was a leak. >> jimmy: Yeah.
Have you been back there since you grew up there?
>> you know, I haven't. But my brother has.
Because this house is now an airbnb.
>> jimmy: Really, a historical airbnb?
>> isn't that insane? We were both, whoever goes back
first, we've got to stay there, you him to?
He took his wife, my wonderful sister-in-law, to show her our
childhood home. He thought it would be sweet and
cool. They stayed in my room.
I also lived in the attic. Really adding to the whole
picture of this. But they were so creeped out
that they left like under cover of night.
[ laughter ] >> jimmy: Really?
They were creeped out by your -- because of the spirits?
Or just -- >> they just felt weird.
Yeah. I can't really -- you know,
maybe the spirits were mad, they were like, oh, you're back.
[ laughter ] >> jimmy: Yeah.
>> I don't know. But I was -- I'm dying to see
it -- I feel this is a perfect setup for a horror movie.
>> jimmy: Yeah, "homecoming," yes.
[ laughter ] >> let's produce it together.
>> jimmy: Yeah, no, hey, listen. I'm ready to do it.
We can make it part of the mcu, the marvel universe.
>> perfect. >> jimmy: By the way, did you
know -- like do you know that your marvel character, who we
first saw in "thor," one day was going to come back?
Or were you totally surprised to find out?
>> totally surprised. I got cold called by marvel, and
I was just like, of course, whatever you want, I'll do it.
I didn't know what it was. I knew these disney plus shows
were coming out. I didn't know which one this
could be. So I was a little bit surprised
because my character had no contact with anyone in the
"wandavision" world. >> jimmy: Yeah.
And so -- I know, you know -- obviously there's an answer to
this question, you can't give it.
But did you know that -- I mean, do you know where that character
is headed? >> my character?
>> jimmy: Yes. >> I only know what I shot.
>> jimmy: You only know what you shot.
You don't have -- >> yes.
>> jimmy: -- Any legal language that would lead you to believe
that something else is going to happen?
>> no. Should I?
Now I'm worried. [ laughter ]
>> jimmy: I don't know. I don't know, but we'll --
>> what do you know, jimmy? [ laughter ]
>> jimmy: I'm just seeing, you know -- because you know how
crazy everybody -- were you surprised how like -- oh, when
quicksilver came to the house. Were you surprised at how much
goes into -- how people like really pull that apart and how
much they know about this world? Because it was not the one from
the marvel, it was the one from the fox x-men, and that leads
people to believe that all of these x-men characters are
coming together for future movies.
>> I'm the last person to know anything.
Even if I were being cool and mysterious, I still wouldn't
even know how to crack open any of these theories.
I still don't understand exactly what's going on.
[ laughter ] >> jimmy: Uh-huh.
>> which is for the best, honestly.
People went nuts. I remember, you know --
obviously that was like a massive surprise.
And I knew -- I mean, they kept it from me a little bit as well.
I wasn't sure what was going on while we were shooting and they
would, you know -- they cloaked him in a -- you know in things
so no one could take like a drone shot of him getting out of
a van or whatever it was. A big secret.
They pulled it off. I mean, everyone was shocked.
>> jimmy: Can I tell you something?
I saw behind you, walking behind you, it seeped like a ghostly
figure dressed as paul revere -- >> stop!
[ laughter ] I don't need this.
Don't, don't do this to me right now.
[ laughter ] >> jimmy: Well, it's great to
see you. New episodes of "wandavision"
are fridays on disney plus. Kat dennings, everybody!
Thanks, kat. >> thanks!
>> dicky: The jimmy kimmel live concert series is presented
by mercedes-benz. The best or nothing.
>> dicky: The jimmy kimmel live concert series is presented by
mercedes-benz. The best or nothing.
>> jimmy: All right, welcome back.
This is their self titled album. It comes out in June.
With the song“distance” a tribute to his incomparable dad,
mammoth wvh! [ cheers and applause ]
♪ ♪ I'm so happy
you've found a place that's better for you
than this rock ♪ ♪ we're living on
I'm so nervous don't know my place
a life without you ♪ ♪ I'm not ready to move on
no matter what the distance is I will be with you
no matter what the distance ♪ ♪ is you'll be okay
so ♪ ♪
♪ I'm so tired can't see your face
my memory of you ♪ ♪ slowly fades when I go on
I'm still cryin' don't want this place
a world without you ♪ ♪ I don't think
I'll ever move on no matter what
the distance is ♪ ♪ I will be with you
no matter what the distance is
I will be with you ♪ ♪ no matter what
the distance is I will be with you
no matter what ♪ ♪ the distance is
you'll be okay no matter what
the distance is ♪ ♪ I will be with you
no matter what the distance is
I will be with you ♪ ♪ no matter what
the distance is I will be with you
no matter what ♪ ♪ the distance is
you'll be okay oh yeah ♪
♪ ♪
♪ no matter what the distance is ♪
♪ I will be with you no matter what
the distance is you'll be okay ♪
♪ no matter what the distance is
I will be with you no matter what ♪
♪ the distance is you'll be okay oh yeah ♪
♪ no matter what the distance is ♪
♪ you'll be okay ♪ no matter what
no matter what the distance is
you'll be okay ♪ ♪
♪ I'm so happy
you've found a place ♪ [ cheers and applause ]
>> jimmy: Thanks to kevin james, kat dennings, and mammoth
wvh, apologies to matt damon. We ran out of time for him.
“nightlin” is next. So lay your head down on that
mypillow and take it in. Goodnight.