KIMMEL LIVE. TONIGHT, NATALIE PORTMAN, AND
NOW, JIMMY KIMMEL.
>> Jimmy: HELLO. I'M JIMMY. I'M THE HOST OF THE SHOW.
THANK YOU FOR WATCHING. I HOPE YOU HAD A GOOD WEEKEND.
I HOPE EVERYONE HAD A NICE TIME INFECTING THEIR FAMILY AND
WATCHING THAT CHESS SHOW ON NETFLIX. GUILLERMO, HOW WAS YOUR
THANKSGIVING?
>> MY THANKSGIVING WAS GREAT, FANTASTIC.
>> Jimmy: YOU DIDN'T POST ANYTHING ON INSTAGRAM.
>> NO, JIMMY.
>> Jimmy: NO DRUNKEN TEXTS?
>> NO, I BEHAVED. DID YOU WATCH THE PARADE?
>> I WAS BUSY HELPING MY WIFE COOKING.
EVERY YEAR ON THANKSGIVING, WHAT I'M MOST THANKFUL FOR IS THAT I
DON'T WORK FOR NBC WHERE THEY FORCE YOU TO BE A PART OF THE
THANKSGIVING DAY PARADE. IT'S, I MEAN, POOR AL ROKER.
EVERY YEAR, "HEY LOOK, IT'S GARFIELD."
"OH, THE TELETUBBIES..." WHEN I WAS A KID, MY DAD WOULD
WAKE US UP. EVERY THANKSGIVING, HE'D COME
INTO OUR ROOMS. THE ONLY TIME I EVER REMEMBER
HIM COMING INTO MY ROOM, HE'D COME IN AND SAY, "THE PARADE IS
ON!" AND WE'D BE LIKE, "WHO CARES?"
I HATE PARADES. ALWAYS HAVE. TO ME, IT'S JUST TRAFFIC WITH
BALLOONS. BUT EVERY YEAR, MY FATHER WOULD
FORCE US OUT OF BED AT LIKE 6:30 IN THE MORNING TO WATCH IT.
AND SO WHAT DID I DO ON THURSDAY?
I GOT THE KIDS, I SAID "HEY! THE PARADE IS ON!
YOU'VE GOTTA WATCH IT!" THEY WATCHED FOR ABOUT FOUR
MINUTES. THEY SAW CHASE FROM "PAW PATROL"
AND SAID, "PUT ON PAW PATROL!"
SO I WATCHED IT ALONE. MACY'S DID THE PARADE A LITTLE
BIT DIFFERENTLY THIS YEAR. BECAUSE OF COVID, THEY COULDN'T
HAVE THE USUAL AMOUNT OF PEOPLE UNDER THE FLOATS.
YOU KNOW, PEOPLE HOLD THE ROPES TO THE FLOATS, BUT THEY COULDN'T
ASSEMBLE A GROUP OF PEOPLE, SO THEY HAD TO FIND ONE GUY TO DO
THIS.
>>> THIS TROOP OF PICACHU, DANCING TO THE CLASSIC POKEMON
SONG. AND HIGH ABOVE THE DANCER SHINES
A BRIGHT SPOT IN THE SKY. A LARGER VERSION, A AMBASSADOR
OF THE POKEMON WORLD, WITH HIS RED CAP ‐‐
>> Jimmy: LOOK AT HIM POKEMON GO. THEY FOUND HIM IN THE HUDSON
RIVER. IT'S SAD. IN CASE YOU HAVEN'T CHECKED YOUR
EMAIL IN THE PAST 24 HOURS, YOU SHOULD KNOW THAT TODAY IS "CYBER
MONDAY." THE ONLY DAY OF THE YEAR WE USE
THE WORD "CYBER" ANYMORE. DID WE REALLY NEED CYBER MONDAY
THIS YEAR? I'VE BEEN CAMPED OUT IN FRONT OF
MY LAPTOP SINCE MARCH. SPEAKING OF BUYING STUFF ONLINE,
THIS IS FUNNY. ONE OF OUR PRODUCERS,
ERIN IRWIN, THERE'S ERIN DRESSED AS BOBA FETT.
ERIN AND HER HUSBAND DAVID HAVE A FIVE‐YEAR‐OLD DAUGHTER NAMED
CHARLIE. WHO, UNBEKNOWNST TO THEM,
ORDERED SOMETHING ON AMAZON, USING THEIR ALEXA.
ERIN, HOW DID THIS PLAY OUT? A GIANT BOX SHOWS UP AT THE
HOUSE, AND THIS IS WHAT WAS INSIDE.
>> I GOT HOME AND SHE SAID, I BOUGHT SOMETHING TODAY.
>> I SAID WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT AND I DIDN'T THINK SHE DID
IT. A GIANT BOX SHOWS UP AT THE HOUSE, AND THIS IS WHAT WAS
INSIDE. A SIX‐FOOT‐STUFFED RASTA MONKEY
WITH A BANANA FOR A BODY. AND HOW MUCH WAS THIS?
>> WELL, SHE SAID THAT IT COST 197, AND I WAS LIKE, WELL, I
GUESS IF SHE DID IT, IT WAS ONLY $1.97, IT WAS $197.
>> Jimmy: THEY LOOKED UP THE TRANSCRIPT OF CHARLIE'S
CONVERSATION WITH ALEXA. YOU GAVE THIS TO US.
THIS IS WHAT SHE SAID. "ALEXA, COULD YOU PLEASE ORDER
THE BANANA TOYS?" WHICH BY THE WAY,
THAT COULD HAVE BEEN A LOT WORSE.
>> THAT'S TRUE. "ALEXA, BUY IT NOW."
"ALEXA, COULD YOU BUY IT NOW?" "ALEXA, BUY IT NOW."
"ALEXA, WHEN IS MY SQUISHY PILLOW GONNA BE COMING?"
"ALEXA, WHEN IS MY BLUSH BLUSH BLUSH SQUISHY PILLOW GONNA COME."
"ALEXA, MY NAME IS CHARLIE." "ALEXA, WHAT DO YOU WANNA TALK
ABOUT?" "ALEXA, ARE THERE MORE BOYS OR
ARE THERE MORE GIRLS IN THE WORLD?"
SOUNDS TO ME LIKE CHARLIE WANTS
YOU TO HAVE ANOTHER KID.
ARE YOU RETURNING THE RASTA BANANA OR KEEPING IT?
>> I WOULD LOVE TO RETURN IT AND I WANT IT OUT OF MY HOUSE, BUT
SHE IS MADLY IN LOVE WITH IT.
>> Jimmy: IT LOOKS LIKE THEY'RE ON THEIR HONEYMOON.
CHARLIE IS A GENIUS. SHE FIGURED OUT HOW TO CUT SANTA
CLAUS OUT OF THE LOOP. SHE DOESN'T HAVE TO BE BE NICE
THIS YEAR. DID CHARLIE ORDER THE TYSON
FIGHT ON PAY PER VIEW THIS WEEKEND TOO?
>> I THINK SO, YEAH.
>> Jimmy: DID YOU WATCH IT, GUILLERMO?
>> I DID.
>> Jimmy: ON SATURDAY NIGHT, MIKE TYSON, AFTER 15 YEARS,
RETURNED TO THE RING TO FIGHT FELLOW RETIREE ROY JONES JR.
THE FIGHT WENT EIGHT ROUNDS. THE JUDGES CALLED IT A DRAW.
IT WAS NOT A DRAW, NOT EVEN CLOSE. TYSON WON EVERY ROUND.
>> EVERY ROUND, JIMMY.
>> Jimmy: BUT THEY CALLED IT A DRAW, AND MIKE
POT BEFORE THE FIGHT DIDN'T SEEM TO MIND AT ALL.
>> FORMER CHAMPIONS, IT'S A DRAW.
MR. TYSON, WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THAT?
>> I'M GOOD WITH THAT.
>> YOU THINK YOU WON THE FIGHT?
>> YEAH, BUT I'M GOOD WITH A DRAW.
>> WHY?
>> BECAUSE I ENTERTAINED THE CROWD, THE PROUD WAS HAPPY WITH
IT.
>> Jimmy: WHO IS THIS PERSON DISGUISED AS MIKE TYSON?
WHAT HAPPENED TO THE GUY WHO SAID HE'D EAT YOUR CHILDREN?
AND BIT OFF TWO EARS! I GUESS THIS MARIJUANA REALLY
WORKS. EVEN HALF‐BAKED, TYSON LOOKED
PRETTY GOOD. ROY JONES WAS HANGING ON TO HIM
FOR DEAR LIFE. IT FELT LESS LIKE A FIGHT, AND
MORE LIKE TWO OLD FRIENDS SEEING EACH OTHER SHORTLY AFTER GETTING
THE VACCINE. THEY ARE JUST LIKE HANGING ON
EACH OTHER. EVEN THOUGH JONES HAS ONLY BEEN
RETIRED FOR A COUPLE OF YEARS, TYSON WAS THE HEAVY FAVORITE.
SOME EVEN WORRIED JONES MIGHT GET SERIOUSLY HURT.
>> A LOT OF PEOPLE WERE AFRAID, ROY, YOU MIGHT GET HURT TONIGHT.
WERE YOU REALLY AFRAID IN THE BACK OF YOUR HEAD THAT SOMETHING
COULD HAPPEN THAT COULD PUT YOU IN PERIL.
>> I WAS AFRAID I MAY GET HIT.
>> I DIDN'T FIGHT FOR 20 YEARS AND HE HAS NOT FOUGHT IN THREE
YEARS. WHY NOBODY CARE ABOUT MY ASS.
>>
>> Jimmy: WELL. LET ME SAY IT HERE AND NOW.
I CARE DEEPLY ABOUT MIKE TYSON'S ASS. STILL THE BEST.
NOBODY BETTER. YESTERDAY, THE DENVER BRONCOS
HAD TO PLAY WITHOUT A QUARTERBACK.
ALL FOUR OF THEIR QBS WERE ON THE COVID NO‐PLAY LIST.
BECAUSE THEY WERE ALL TOGETHER WITH NO MASKS.
WHAT HAPPENED WAS, THEY GOT TOGETHER FOR WHAT WAS SUPPOSED
TO BE A QUICK, SOCIALLY DISTANCED STRATEGY SESSION, THEN
SOMEONE TURNED ON "THE CROWN." NEXT THING YOU KNOW, IT'S
12 HOURS AND THREE BOXES OF PINK ZINFANDEL LATER.
THEY'RE ALL INELIGIBLE TO PLAY. THEY HAD TO BRING IN A ROOKIE
RECEIVER TO PLAY QUARTERBACK. IT WAS LIKE A SCENE FROM "RUDY."
EXCEPT IN THIS ONE, RUDY'S TEAM LOST. BADLY.
AND RUDY WAS TERRIBLE. THIS WAS THE FIRST TIME THEY
ASKED "ARE YOU READY FOR SOME FOOTBALL?"
AND THE ANSWER WAS "MAYBE NOT?" I DON'T THINK WE ARE.
YOU KNOW WHO ELSE IS ON THE INJURED RESERVE LIST? JOE BIDEN.
THE PRESIDENT‐ELECT TOOK A TUMBLE THIS WEEKEND.
HERE HE IS HOBBLING OUT OF A DELAWARE CLINIC LAST NIGHT.
BIDEN SUFFERED HAIRLINE FRACTURES IN HIS RIGHT FOOT.
EVEN THE EVENTFUL THINGS THAT HAPPEN TO JOE BIDEN ARE
UNEVENTFUL. APPARENTLY, HE SLIPPED AND FELL
WHILE PLAYING WITH MAJOR, HIS DOG. THE PENTAGON TODAY ANNOUNCED
THAT MAJOR HAS BEEN DEMOTED TO "CAPTAIN."
BIDEN WILL MOST LIKELY HAVE TO WEAR AN ORTHOPEDIC BOOT FOR A
FEW WEEKS. SO IN A WAY, TRUMP AND BIDEN
BOTH GOT THE BOOT THIS MONTH. BLOATUS WEIGHED IN ON BIDEN'S
INJURY LAST NIGHT. HE WROTE, "GET WELL SOON!"
HE'S JUST JEALOUS BECAUSE BIDEN HAS A DOG AND ALL HE HAS IS
MIKE PENCE. CAN YOU IMAGINE TRUMP HAVING A
DOG? I CAN'T PICTURE HIM FEEDING ANYONE ELSE.
THE CLOSEST TRUMP GETS TO THAT IS WHEN HE FEEDS GIULIANI A
BUCKET OF FROZEN MICE. MEANWHILE, THIS IS HOW THE LAME
DUCK CHOSE TO SPEND HIS FINAL THANKSGIVING AT THE WHITE HOUSE.
HE THREW A WORLD‐CLASS TRUMPER TANTRUM FROM BEHIND A TINY
LITTLE DESK. DON'T YOU DARE SPEAK TO ME THE
‐‐ IF THEY DO. THEY MADE A MISTAKE.
BECAUSE THIS ELECTION WAS A FRAUD. JUST SAY YOU UNDERSTAND.
THIS ELECTION WAS A FRAUD. SO, NO, I CAN'T SAY THAT AT ALL.
I THINK IT'S A POSSIBILITY, THEY ARE TRYING TO ‐‐ LOOK, BETWEEN
YOU PEOPLE, DON'T TALK TO ME THAT WAY.
YOU JUST ARE A LIGHT WEIGHT, DON'T TALK TO ME THAT WAY.
I'M THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES.
DON'T EVER TALK TO THE PRESIDENT THAT WAY.
DON'T YOU DARE SPEAK TO ME THE WAY I SPEAK TO EVERYONE ELSE!
SITTING AT A LITTLE BABY DESK SCREAMING, "YOU CAN'T TALK TO
THE PRESIDENT THAT WAY!" IS EXACTLY HOW I WANT TO
REMEMBER THIS PRESIDENT. THIS DESK HE WAS SITTING AT HAS
BEEN USED BY MANY PRESIDENTS TO SIGN BILLS, BUT USUALLY THEY'RE
SURROUNDED BY A GROUP OF PEOPLE, SO YOU DON'T NOTICE HOW LITTLE
IT IS. IT LOOKED LIKE HE WENT BACK TO
VISIT HIS ELEMENTARY SCHOOL. THE LAST TIME I WAS AT A DESK
LIKE THAT, I HAD MY HEAD DOWN AND WE WERE PLAYING 7‐UP.
SMALL HANDS ON DESK! THE FUTURE FORMER PRESIDENT WAS
ALSO ASKED ABOUT HIS PLAN FOR HIS LAST TURKEY DAY IN THE WHITE
HOUSE, AND THAT WENT ABOUT AS WELL AS YOU MIGHT EXPECT.
>> MR. PRESIDENT, DO YOU HAVE PLANS FOR YOUR LAST THANKSGIVING
IN THE WHITE HOUSE?
>> WE DON'T KNOW WHAT IS LAST, IF YOU LOOK AT WHAT'S GOING ON.
YOU HAVE TO REALLY TAKE A LOOK AT WHAT'S GOING ON.
AND THEY ARE FINDING TREMENDOUS DISCREPANCIES IN THE VOTES AND
NOBODY BELIEVES THOSE NUMBERS. THOSE NUMBERS ARE INCORRECT
NUMBERS. SO, I CAN'T SAY WHAT'S FIRST AND
WHAT'S LAST IN TERMS OF IS THIS THE LAST 1 OR IS THIS THE FIRST
ONE OF A SECOND TERM. WE WILL SEE WHAT HAPPENS.
I'LL TELL YOU WHAT HAPPENS. NEXT THANKSGIVING, YOU WILL BE
AT MAR‐A‐LAGO STILL SCREAMING ABOUT THE ELECTION AND EATING
CREAMED SPINACH ALONE. WE ARE NOW ON DAY 27 OF
SQUATTERGATE. TRUMP STILL HAS NOT MADE A
CONCESSION SPEECH, HE CONTINUES TO DISPUTE THE RESULTS OF THE
ELECTION. LAST NIGHT, HE WROTE, "NO WAY WE
LOST THIS ELECTION." WE MIGHT TO HAVE TO FILE A
RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST HIM. TRUMP GAVE HIS FIRST
POST‐ELECTION INTERVIEW YESTERDAY. HE CALLED INTO THE
ALWAYS‐SYCOPHANTIC MARIA BARTIROMO'S SHOW YESTERDAY
TO MAKE A CORNUCOPIA OF UNCHALLENGED FALSE CLAIMS.
>>> I WAS CALLED BY THE BIGGEST PEOPLE SAYING CONGRATULATIONS,
POLITICAL PEOPLE. CONGRATULATIONS, SIR, YOU JUST
WON THE ELECTION. IT WAS 10:00 AND YOU LOOKED AT
THE NUMBERS AND I'M SURE YOU FELT THAT WAY.
THIS ELECTION WAS OVER AND THEN THEY DID DUMPS.
THEY CALL THEM DUMPS. BIG MASSIVE DUMPS IN MICHIGAN,
AND IN PENNSYLVANIA, AND ALL OVER.
>> Jimmy: WHEN YOU GET TO HIS AGE, A LOT OF THE CONVERSATION
IS ABOUT THE SIZE OF YOUR DUMPS. MARIA BARTIROMO BY THE WAY ‐‐
I DON'T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED TO HER, BUT SHE APPEARS TO BE
AUDITIONING FOR THE POSITION OF DONALD TRUMP'S NEXT WIFE.
THIS IS INTERESTING. ACCORDING TO NBC NEWS, TRUMP
UNDERPERFORMED IN 25 OUT OF THE 30 COUNTIES WHERE HE HELD
RALLIES BEFORE THE ELECTION. HE DID WORSE IN THOSE COUNTIES
THAN HE DID IN 2016. I GUESS TELLING A GROUP OF
PEOPLE WHO ARE FREEZING THEIR NUTS OFF THAT YOUR OPPONENT WILL
TAKE AWAY THEIR AIR CONDITIONING DIDN'T RALLY THE BASE LIKE HE
HOPED. THE STATE OF ARIZONA CERTIFIED A
WIN FOR JOE BIDEN TODAY. THEY ALSO FINISHED THE RECOUNT
IN WISCONSIN. THE RECOUNT IN WISCONSIN COST
THE TRUMP CAMPAIGN THREE MILLION DOLLARS, AND THE RESULT OF THAT
RECOUNT WAS BIDEN PICKED UP 87 MORE VOTES. MONEY WELL SPENT.
NO SITTING PRESIDENT HAS EVER LOST ONE ELECTION SO MANY TIMES.
BUT TRUMP COULD BE COMING BACK FOR MORE.
NOT ONLY IS HE REPORTEDLY PLANNING TO RUN AGAIN IN 2024,
HE IS FLOATING THE IDEA OF LAUNCHING HIS CAMPAIGN DURING
JOE BIDEN'S INAUGURATION WEEK. BECAUSE OF COURSE HE IS.
I THINK HE SHOULD DO IT AT BIDEN'S INAUGURATION.
RUN UP, GRAB THE MIC, AND COMPLETE HIS TRANSFORMATION INTO
FULL ORANGE KANYE. MELANIA TRUMP TODAY UNVEILED THE
ANNUAL WHITE HOUSE CHRISTMAS DECORATIONS.
SHE WROTE, "DURING THIS SPECIAL TIME OF THE YEAR, I AM DELIGHTED
TO SHARE "AMERICA THE BEAUTIFUL" AND PAY TRIBUTE TO THE MAJESTY
OF OUR GREAT NATION. TOGETHER, WE CELEBRATE THIS LAND
WE ARE ALL PROUD TO CALL HOME." WHICH IS ODD BECAUSE ONE OF THE
STORIES THAT GOT BURIED WHEN TRUMP'S TAX RETURNS CAME OUT
WERE THE TAPES OF MELANIA SAYING SHE HATES DOING CHRISTMAS AT THE
WHITE HOUSE. BUT NOW, SHE LOVES IT.
THIS IS A VIDEO THE FIRST LADY PUT OUT TODAY, PUTTING HER BE
BEST FOOT FORWARD.
>>>.
♪
>> Jimmy: AT LEAST SHE'S HAVING FUN WITH IT.
MAKE NO MISTAKE ABOUT IT. MELANIA TRUMP IS NOT ENTHUSED
ABOUT BEING IN CHARGE OF CHRISTMAS AT THE WHITE HOUSE.
IN THE WAR ON CHRISTMAS, SHE IS GENERAL LEE.
BUT THERE'S AN OLD TRUMP FAMILY SAYING THAT GOES NOTHING WE SAY
IS TRUE, SO WE MIGHT AS WELL FIND A WAY TO MAKE MONEY OFF IT.
>>> CHRISTMAS IS COMING. THE SLEIGH BELLS ARE RINGING AND
THE FIRST LADY HATES EVERY BIT OF IT.
NOW YOU CAN EXPERIENCE THE ANGST AND FURY OF A WHITE HOUSE
CHRISTMAS, WITH A NEW HOLIDAY ALBUM, WITH THE MELANIA TRUMP ‐‐
ALL THE HITS ON ONE DISK. WITH CLASSICS LIKE ‐‐ THE HALLS.
THE 12 DAYS OF ALL THESE ‐‐. WHO CARES THAT SANTA CLAUS IS
COMING TO ON TOWN AND MORE. WHETHER YOU ARE IN THE MOOD OR
NOT.
>> I'M WORKING MY ASS OFF ON THIS CHRISTMAS STUFF.
>> I KNOW.
>> YOU ARE GOING TO APPRECIATE IT, DAMN IT.
WITH TIMELESS CARROLS LIKE, IF I HEAR ONE MORE BELL ON CHRISTMAS
DAY. WHAT CHILD IS THIS? NO ONE ASKS OBAMA.
AND OF COURSE, THE ALL‐TIME HOLIDAY CLASSIC, I SAW DADDY
HUMPING STORMY CLAUS. THIS YEAR, IT'S A MERRY ‐‐
CHRISTMAS TO YOU AND YOURS AND IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT GIVE ME
A ‐‐ BREAK. MELANIA TRUMP'S WHO GIVES A ‐‐
ABOUT CHRISTMAS. AVAILABLE WHERE PUMPKIN PIES ARE
SOLD.
>> Jimmy: MOVE OVER, MARIAH!
WE HAVE A GOOD SHOW FOR YOU TONIGHT.
CHEF DAVID CHANG IS HERE. WE'VE GOT MUSIC FROM
RUSSELL DICKERSON. AND WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH
NATALIE PORTMAN.
♪
>> Jimmy: WELCOME BACK. TONIGHT, A GREAT CHEF, A GOOD
MAN, AND THE FIRST CELEBRITY TO ACTUALLY WIN A MILLION DOLLARS
ON "WHO WANTS TO BE A MILLIONAIRE?"
DAVID CHANG IS HERE. AND LATER, HIS ALBUM IS CALLED
"SOUTHERN SYMPHONY." MUSIC FROM RUSSELL DICKERSON.
LATER THIS WEEK, WE'VE GOT NEW SHOWS WITH GEORGE CLOONEY,
ZENDAYA, RITA WILSON, AMANDA SEYFRED, DIEGO LUNA,
JOHN MULANEY, AND WE'LL HAVE MUSIC FROM TONES AND I,
DEVON GILFILLIAN, AND PARIS JACKSON. DAUGHTER OF MICHAEL.
WHO IS VERY TALENTED. OUR FIRST GUEST TONIGHT IS AN
OSCAR‐WINNING ACTOR, A DIRECTOR, PRODUCER, ACTIVIST, THUNDER
GODDESS, AND NOW BEST‐SELLING CHILDREN'S BOOK AUTHOR.
"NATALIE PORTMAN'S FABLES" IS AVAILABLE NOW.
PLEASE SAY HELLO TO NATALIE PORTMAN.
>>> HI, NATALIE.
>> HELLO. HELD HAD OH. HOW ARE YOU?
>> Jimmy: I'M GOOD. YOU ARE VERY FAR AWAY FROM US.
AREN'T YOU?
>> I AM, I'M DOWN UNDER.
>> Jimmy: YEAH.
>> AUSTRALIA.
>> Jimmy: LIKE, WHAT TIME IS IT THERE, NOW?
>> IT'S NOON ON TUESDAY.
>> Jimmy: OH. IT'S ‐‐
>> WE ARE IN DECEMBER HERE.
>> Jimmy: OH, WOW. WHAT'S DECEMBER GOING TO BE LIKE?
GIVE US A PREVIEW.
>> SUMMER IS STARTING, GUYS.
>> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT WILL. IT'S THE OPPOSITE SEASON WISE
OVER THERE. WELL, IT STILL FEELS LIKE SUMMER
HERE REALLY. HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN IN
AUSTRALIA?
>> I HAVE BEEN HERE A FEW MONTHS, YEAH, AND I'M GOING TO
BE HERE FOR A FEW MORE MONTHS FOR THOR.
>> Jimmy: YOU ARE PREPARING TO SHOOT THOR, DO YOU KNOW
EVERYTHING THAT IS HAPPENING IN MOVIE ALREADY?
>> NO.
>> Jimmy: YOU DON'T?
>> NO, NO, VERY LITTLE. BUT JUST YOU KNOW, TRYING TO
TRAIN, HOOK LIKE A ACTION FIGURE AT SOME POINT. HOPEFULLY.
>> Jimmy: YOU KNOW THAT IN THE COMICS YOUR CHARACTER, JANE
FOSTER, BECOMES THOR, SHE TAKES ON THE POWERS OF THOR ANDTHE
HAMMER AND EVERYTHING LIKE THAT. WILL YOU, DO YOU KNOW ‐‐ I KNOW
YOU CAN'T SAY, DO YOU KNOW ‐‐
>> YES.
>> Jimmy: YOU WILL BECOME THOR?
>> YES, YES, THE MIGHTY THOR.
>> Jimmy: THE MIGHTY THOR.
>> THE JANE FOSTER THOR IS
CALLED THE MIGHTY Y THOR, YES.
>> Jimmy: ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU HAVE BEEN RIDING A HORSE FOR A
LONG TIME, AND YOU SAY, ON OH, I'M THE MIGHTY THOR.
>> WAIT A MINUTE.
>> Jimmy: WE USED TO HAVE A DRUMMER ‐‐ WE USED TO HAVE A
DRUMMER. I DON'T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED, I
THINK THE COVID GOT HIM. THERE'S NO COVID THERE IN AUS T‐
IN AUSTRALIA, IS THERE? IT'S HEALTHY AND SAFE THERE?
>> YEAH, THE GOVERNMENT HAS DONE A REALLY, REALLY INCREDIBLE JOB
AT BEING ‐‐ YEAH, IT'S BEEN THREE WEEKS WITH NO LOCAL CASES.
>> Jimmy: ARE YOU SAYING OUR GOVERNMENT IN THE UNITED STATES
OF AMERICA HAS NOT DONE A GREAT JOB?
>> OH, NO, I WOULD NEVER. I WOULD NEVER SAY ANYTHING LIKE
THAT.
>> Jimmy: THAT'S KIND OF WEIRD BECAUSE YOU ARE, YEAH, YOU ARE
FAR AWAY AND YOU ARE LIVING LIKE NORMAL PEOPLE.
LIKE THEY THE USED TO LIVE IN THE OLDEN TIMES.
>> YEAH, IT DEFINITELY FEELS LIKE A TIME MACHINE AND VERY
GRATEFUL TO GET THE OPPORTUNITY TO LIVE LIKE THAT.
>> Jimmy: YEAH, I BET. DID YOU CELEBRATE THANKSGIVING
AMERICAN STYLE THERE?
>> YEAH, IT IS SORT OF LIKE A CELEBRATION WITH ACKNOWLEDGMENT
OF THE HISTORY. THE DARK HISTORY OF THE COUNTRY
RATHER THAN THE WAY I GREW UP DOING IT.
BUT WE CERTAINLY DID ENJOY THE FOOD OF THE HOLIDAY.
>> Jimmy: THEY DO THAT BECAUSE I'M LIKE, YEAH, THESE PEOPLE
CAME, THEY HAD HATS WITH BELT BUCKLES ON THEM, AND NOW, HERE
WE ARE. DID YOU COOK A TURKEY OR ‐‐ YOU
ARE VEGAN, CORRECT?
>> I'M VEGAN, YEAH. YEAH, SO, I FOUND.
I DON'T KNOW IF IT'S AUSTRALIAN OR IF I JUST DISCOVERED HIT
WHILE HERE, THERE'S A THING CALLED SUZANNE SPOON VEGAN
BUTCHER THEY HAVE ALL THE FAKE MEAT PREPARATIONS SO ‐‐ GOT SOME
PLANT BASED SCHNITZEL AND THAT WAS OUR CENTER PIECE OF OUR MEAL.
>> Jimmy: REALLY, SOMEONE CASHED TH
‐‐ SOMEONE CARVED THE SCHNITZEL IN YOUR THANKSGIVING?
>> VERY TRADITIONAL.
>> Jimmy: WHAT 'S IN THE PLANT BASED SCH NNITZEL.
>> UNCLEAR. SOY, NOT MEAT.
>> Jimmy: LET'S LOOK AT THE PICTURE THAT CHRIS HEMSWORTH
POSTED ON INSTAGRAM.
>> GREAT SEGUE.
>> Jimmy: I THINK HE HAS GAINED 40 POUNDS OF MUSCLE BASED ON THE
PHOTO, IT DOES NOT LOOK REAL.
>> IT'S OTHER WORLDLY. I ALSO LIKE, I FEEL LIKE I'M SO
UNVERSED IN WHAT MUSCLES DO AND HOW THEY GET LIKE THAT.
LIKE, DOES THE BLOOD DRAIN OUT OF YOU WHEN YOU USE YOUR MUSCLES?
BECAUSE IT LOOKS SO WHITE, DOESN'T IT.
>> Jimmy: OH, YEAH, HIS BODY IS WHITE, YEAH.
>> I FEEL LIKE IT'S A T‐SHIRT TAN, RIGHT?
IS THAT WHAT'S HAPPENING?
>> Jimmy: IT LOOKS LIKE MAYBE, YEAH.
>> OH, CHRIS. WE HAVE TO GET YOU SOME SPRAY
TAN. WE HAVE TO HELP WITH THE MUSCLE
PICTURES.
>> Jimmy: YOU KNOW, WE SHOULD GET HIM A AAA CARD BECAUSE HE
SEEMS TO BE CHANGING HIS TIRES BY HIMSELF.
>> YES. HE IS LOOKING GOOD. IT'S A LOT OF PRESSURE.
I'M GOING TO LOOK LIKE HIS LITTLE GRANDMA NEXT TO HIM.
>> Jimmy: ARE YOUR KIDS ENJOYING BEING IN AUSTRALIA?
>> YES, IT'S VERY LUCKY. AND SO, SO DIFFERENT LIKE ALL
THE ANIMALS ARE DIFFERENT, THE TREES ARE DIFFERENT.
THE ‐‐ EVEN THE BIRDS, I MEAN, LIKE, THERE'S MULTI‐COLORED
PARROTS FLYING AROUND LIKE PIGEONS.
>> Jimmy: YEAH.
>> IT'S WILD.
>> Jimmy: AND THEY WILL KILL YOU, THOSE THINGS, RIGHT?
EVERYTHING IS DANGEROUS.
>> IT'S ACTUALLY NOT THE LIKE BIG THINGS THAT ARE ‐‐ THE
DANGEROUS THINGS ARE LIKE THE LITTLE SPIDERS.
>> Jimmy: YEAH, THE LITTLE SPIDERS YOU HAVE TO WATCH OUT
FOR. ARE THE KIDS PICKING UP ACCENTS
THERE? KIDS SEEM TO DO THAT, RIGHT?
>> MORE LIKE, MORE WORDS BECAUSE YOU NEED TO YEAH LIKE, YOU KNOW,
WHEN YOU WANT SOMETHING LIKE THEY SAY LOHLIES NOW INSTEAD OF
CANDY. AND TOMATO SAUCE INSTEAD OF
KETCHUP. WHEN YOU WANT WHAT YOU WANT YOU
HAVE TO SAY IT THE WAY THE LOCALS DO, YOU KNOW?
I WOULD LIKE TOMATO SAUCE WITH MY CHIPS.
>>
>>.
>> Jimmy: YEAH, WELL YEAH THE KIDS ARE LEARNING.
YOU DON'T WANT TO GET BEAT UP.
>> THEY ARE VERY FLEXIBLE.
>> Jimmy: SPEAKING OF CHILDREN, YOU HAVE WRITTEN A BOOK FOR
CHILDREN, CALLED NAT HIALIE PORTMAN'S FABLES.
WE WILL HAVE MORE OF THAT WHEN WE COME BACK, NATALIE PORTMAN
FROM AUSTRALIA.
>> PORTIONS OF "JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE," ARE BROUGHT TO YOU BY
AFFIRM.
THE PAYMENT ALTERNATIVE TO CREDIT CARDS.
♪
>>> WELCOME BACK, NATALIE PORTMAN IS WITH US.
NATALIE HAS WRITTEN A BOOK. NATALIE PORTMAN'S FABLES.
YOU HAVE ADAPTED CLASSIC CHILDREN STORIES CORRECT?
>> CORRECT, YEAH. I LOVE THE CLASSIC FABLES AND
MORALS THAT THEY PASSED DOWN, THAT WE HAVE GROWN UP WITH.
OUR PARENTS AND GRANDPARENTS GREW UP WITH THEM.
I REALIZED WHEN I WAS READING THEM TO MY KIDS ALL THE
CHARACTERS WERE MALE AND I DIDN'T WANT EITHER OF MY KIDS TO
HAVE THAT.
SO I MADE IT MORE REFLECTIVE OF THE ANIMAL KINGDOM.
>>.
>> Jimmy: RIGHT.
>> BUT KEPT THE CLASSIC MESSAGES OF THEM.
SO, IT WAS A REALLY FUN PROJECT TO KIND OF CREATE FOR MY KIDS.
AS YOU KNOW, YOU WROTE A KIDS'
BOOK TO TOO.
>> Jimmy: WHAT I LAIKE IS YOUR BOOK RIPHYMES.
AND I THOUGHT YOU HAD TO DO THAT, YOU DO HAVE TO DO THAT
WITH FABS. RIGHT? THAT'S PART OF THE DEAL.
>> I DON'T KNOW, I LOVE, I KNOW WHEN I READ TO MY KIDS I LOVE
THINGS THAT HAVE A RHYME. I FIND IT EASIER TO DO KIND OF
READ OF AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN. AND ALSO, IN MY FAMILY, LIKE MY
MOM ALWAYS WROTE OUR, ALL THE HOLIDAY CARDS AND EVERYTHING IN
RHYME. SO IT FELT LIKE KIND OF A FAMILY
THING.
>> Jimmy: THAT'S NICE, YEAH, YOU BOUGHT A WOMAN'S SOCCER TEAM, I
WAS READING, HERE IN LOS ANGELES, RIGHT?
YOU ARE ONE OF THE OWNERS OF THE TEAM.
>> YES, IT'S SUPER EXCITING. WE HAVE AN INCREDIBLE OWNERSHIP
GROUP OF INCREDIBLE ATHLETES LIKE SERENA WILLIAMS AND BILLIE
JEAN KING AND LYNDSAY VAUGHN AND 14 FORMER U. S. NATIONAL TEAM
PLAYERS. AND THEN A BUNCH OF ACTRESSES
CAME TOGETHER SO, JESS CHESTAIN, AND WE HAVE GOT A WHOLE
INCREDIBLE GROUP. I'M SURE I'M LEAVING PEOPLE OUT
AND A GROUP OF TECH AND BUSINESS WOMEN CAME TOGETHER TO START
THIS FIRST PROFESSIONAL WOMEN'S SOCCER TEAM IN LOS ANGELES IN A
WHILE. SO WE ARE STARTING ‐‐
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> Jimmy: THAT SEEMS LIKE, THAT SEEMS LIKE IT WOULD BE A LOT OF
FUN. DID YOU PLAY SOCCER AS A KID?
>> I AM SO NOT ATHLETIC. AND I ADMIRE IT SO.
ALL MY FRIENDS FROM GROWING UP WERE KIND OF LAUGHING AT ME THAT
I HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH PROFESSIONAL SPORTS.
BUT I JUST THINK IT'S SUCH AN INCREDIBLE LIKE TALENT THAT
THESE WOMEN HAVE, AND WANTED TO CELEBRATE THEIR GREAT
ACHIEVEMENT, AND AMPLIFY WHAT THEY ARE DOING, BECAUSE WE HAVE
AN INCREDIBLE WOMEN'S SOCCER LEAGUE IN THE COUNTRY, AND
UNFORTUNATELY THEY DON'T GET THE KIND OF JOURNALISTIC COVERAGE
AND KIND OF MEDIA COVERAGE THAT THEY DESERVE, EXCEPT WHEN IT'S
THE WORLD CUP, AND SO, WE HAVE GOT TO WATCH THEM WHEN THEY ARE
PLAYING THEIR HOME GAMES TO AND SUPPORT THEM WHEN THEY ARE NOT
JUST ON THE INTERNATIONAL STAGE.
>> Jimmy: WHEN YOU WERE A KID, YOU WERE NOT ENROLLED THE ‐‐ YOU
WERE NOT PLAYING ON ON A YOUTH SOCCERER TEAM.
WE HAVE A PHOTOGRAPH THAT I WANTED TO RUN BY YOU.
THAT'S YOU AT WHAT AGE?
>> I, 7, I WOULD GUESS. THAT LOOKS LIKE 7 OR 8.
NO, IT WAS 1990, I WAS BORN IN 1981. SO I'M NINE THERE.
>> Jimmy: AND THE PUPPIES WERE HIT WITH RADIATION TO MAKE THEM
THAT SIZE?
>> OR MAKE I WAS SHUNKEN TO BE PUPPY SIZE. I DON'T KNOW.
QUESTIONABLE PROPORTIONS AT SEARS.
>> Jimmy: THIS IS, WHERE IS THIS PHOTOGRAPH DISPLAYED?
>> OH, AT MY PARENTS' HOUSE. YOU KNOW, IT'S WHAT HAPPEN WS WN
YOU ARE AN ONLY CHILD, THERE'S A LOT OF WEIRD UNFLATTERING
PICTURES HAPPENING EVERYWHERE.
>> Jimmy: YEAH, THAT IS A GOOD ONE.
I MEAN, YEAH, THERE WERE SOME ‐‐ WE HAVE WEIRD PICTURES BUT NOT
WITH THE GIANT PUPPIES LIKE THAT.
>> I MEAN YOU WERE NOT IN THE MALL ON LONG ISLAND IN 1990, YOU
MISSED OUT.
>> Jimmy: WHAT MALL WAS THAT, DO YOU REMEMBER?
>> PROBABLY ROOSEVELT FIELD, MAYBE. I DON'T KNOW.
SOMEWHERE, SOMEWHERE, YOU KNOW ‐‐
>> Jimmy: SOMEWHERE PEOPLE ARE ALLOWED TO GO IN TO NOW.
IT'S VERY GOOD TO TALK TO YOU. THANKS FOR GIVING US THE UPDATE
ON HOW DECEMBER IS GOING. THIS IS THE BOOK, IT'S CALLED
"NATALIE PORTMAN'S FABLES," ITY ‐‐ IT'S OUT NOW.
WE WILL BE RIGHT BACK WITH DAVID CHANG.
>>> NOW IT'S TIME FOR THE "JIMMY
KIMMEL LIVE" ROCK PAPER SCISSORS CHALLENGE.
WE HAVE SEAN WICKED FINGERS, AND NOW, IS THE BIG MOMENT.
GET READY, VIEWER. ROCK PAPER SCISSORS, SHOOT.
SEAN THROWS A ROCK. T TOLD YOU HE WAS GOOD.
♪
>> Jimmy: WELCOME BACK. OUR NEXT GUEST IS AN ACCLAIMED
CHEF, AUTHOR AND PODCASTER. AS OF LAST NIGHT, HE IS ALSO THE
FIRST CELEBRITY TO WIN IT ALL ON "WHO WANTS TO BE A MILLIONAIRE?"
PLEASE WELCOME DAVID CHANG.
♪
>> Jimmy: HOW ARE YOU? ARE YOU ‐‐ HAVE YOU BEEN WALKING
AROUND TOWN WITH THAT?
>> EVERYWHERE I GO, I BRING THIS TO LET PEOPLE KNOW THAT I WON.
>> Jimmy: DON'T TRY TO CASH IT. I KNOW I SIGNED IT.
I DON'T KNOW WHY THEY HAD ME SIGN IT.
THE MILLION DOLLARS DOESN'T COME FROM ME.
BUT CONGRATULATIONS ON THAT BY THE WAY.
YES, IT'S ‐‐ YEAH, KEEP THAT RIGHT THERE.
I WOULD REALLY CARRY THAT, I WOULD MAKE A NECKLACE OUT OF IT,
IF I WAS YOU.
>> IT'S THE MOST SURREAL THING. I STILL DO NOT BELIEVE IT
HAPPENED. IT'S SO CRAZY.
>> Jimmy: IT WAS FUNNY. AND I WANT TO GET TO THAT IN A
SECOND. I WANT TO FIRST ASK ABOUT
SOMETHING, I WAS ON YOUR PODCAST THAT ACTUALLY WAS RELEASED
TODAY. AND YOU TOLD ME SOMETHING THAT I
HAVE BEEN THINKING IING ABOUT I WEEKEND, YOU FORGOT TO GIVE
TURKEY FOR THANKSGIVING.
>> I DID.
>> Jimmy: AND THEN YOU WERE UNABLE TO ‐‐ EVEN WITH A LITTLE
BIT OF NOTICE, YOU WERE UNABLE TO GET A TURKEY.
>> I SENIORORT OF SCREWED UP, I THE ONE THING THAT MY WIFE
WANTED. I DIDN'T WANT A TURKEY. BUT MY WIFE WANTED A TURKEY BUT
IT DID NOT EXIST, THERE WAS ONLY A TURKEY BREAST AND THAT WAS NOT
GOING TO CUT IT.
>> Jimmy: I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU THE NOT REACH OUT TO YOUR
CONTACTS, DID YOU TRY?
>> I TRIED ENOUGH.
>> Jimmy: YOU TRIED ENOUGH. WHAT THE DID YOU HAVE?
>> CREAMED BARBECUE, I PICKED IT UP FROM PARKS HERE IN L. A.
IT WAS GREAT.
>> Jimmy: AS I WAS SITTING DOWN AND EATING MY TURKEY ON
THANKSGIVING, I WAS SAYING, I WISH I HAD KOREAN BARBECUE RIGHT
NOW.
>> IT WAS WEIRD, IT WAS DIFFERENT FOR ME TO HAVE KOREAN
BARBECUE WITH WHAT I CALL THE WHITE PEOPLE SIDES.
>> Jimmy: YOU DID HAVE ALL THE SIDES.
>> YEAH.
>> Jimmy: AT YOUR HOUSE GROWING UP WITH YOUR PARENTS BEING
IMMIGRANTS, DID YOU CELEBRATE THANKSGIVING WITH THE TURKEY?
>> THANKSGIVING WAS THE DAY THAT MY BROTHERS AND SISTERS LOOKED
FORWARD TO THE MOST. IT WAS THE ONE DAY WE KNEW WE
WERE GETTING AMERICAN FOOD. GROWING UP AS WE WERE MORE AWARE
OF WHAT KOREAN FOOD WAS HERE IN THIS COUNTRY, IT WAS NOT BELOVED
BACK THEN.
>>.
>> Jimmy: RIGHT, YEAH.
>> SO WE WERE EMBARRASSED BY IT. THERE WAS NOT A GUARANTEE THAT
MY MOM WOULD MAKE AMERICAN FOOD. IT'S THE ONE DAY WE KNEW WE
WOULD GET MASHED POTATOES AND STUFFING AND ALL SIDES.
SO THAT WAS THE BEST DAY. BECAUSE WE ALSO GOT THE BEST OF
KOREAN FOOD.
>> Jimmy: RIGHT, YEAH. YEAH.
THAT'S HOW IT WAS AT MY HOUSE TOO. NO, I'M NOT KIDDING.
I DON'T MEAN KOREAN, I MEAN IT WAS ALWAYS ITALIAN FOOD.
LIKE, ALWAYS. THERE WAS RARELY ANY FOOD OTHER
THAN THAT IN OUR HOUSE. AND I THINK MOSTLY IT'S BECAUSE
ITALIAN FOOD IS CHEAP. BECAUSE PASTA DOES NOT COST
ANYTHING.
>> YOU STILL HAD TURKEY AND EVERYTHING, RIGHT.
>> Jimmy: ON THANKSGIVING, IT WAS NEVER GOOD.
NOT CLOSE TO GOOD. IT WAS NOT SOMETHING WE CRAVED.
ALL RIGHT, SO LET'S TALK ABOUT WHO WANTS TO BE A MILLIONAIRE.
HOW CONFIDENT DID YOU FEEL GOING IN TO THIS?
>> TRUTHFULLY, MY ENTIRE GOAL WAS TO NOT BE ELIMINATED AFTER
THE FIRST QUESTION.
>> Jimmy: OKAY. NOW, THE FIRST QUESTIONS ARE
PRETTY EASY. YOU ALMOST GOT TRIPPED UP ON A
VERY EASY QUESTION.
>> YES.
>> Jimmy: WHAT WAS THAT?
>> IT WAS, IF A TODDLER EATS ALL OF THEIR FOOD WHAT CLUB DO THEY
BELONG TO.
>> Jimmy: RIGHT, YES.
>> MY INITIAL REACTION WHEN YOU READ THE QUESTION WAS I DON'T
KNOW THE ANSWER BECAUSE I MEAN IT WAS THE CLEAN PLATE CLUB AND
SITTING IN THAT CHAIR, VERSE WATCHING IT FROM TV ARE
COMPLETELY TWO DIFFERENT EXPERIENCES.
>> Jimmy: ABSOLUTELY.
>> AND IF I'M WATCHING AT HOME, I'M LIKE, OF COURSE, IT'S CLEAN
PLATE CLUB. IN THE CHAIR, WITH THE MUSIC
TALKING TO YOU I HAD NO IDEA WHAT THE ANSWER WAS.
SO I HAD TO ASK MY GUEST.
>> Jimmy: ALLEN YANG WAS YOUR EXPERT HELPER AND HE WAS GOOD.
HE KNEW CLEAN PLATE CLUB. EVERYONE EXCEPT YOU KNEW THAT.
>> EVERYBODY.
>> Jimmy: BUT, YOU KNEW A LOT OF THE ANSWERS THAT A LOT OF PEOPLE
DIDN'T KNOW. NOW, LET'S GO TO THE MOMENT.
THIS IS FOR A MILLION DOLLARS.
YOUR METALLIC TESTICLES JUST WON
YOU A MILLION DOLLARS.
>> OH, MAN.
OH, GOD!
>> Jimmy: NOW, HADTHAT WAS, THA WAS AN EXCITING MOMENT.
IT WAS A SHAME WE DIDN'T HAVE AN AUDIENCE TO SHARE IT.
BUT IT WAS EXCITING. NOT ONLY DID YOU MAKE HISTORY BY
BEING THE FIRST CELEBRITY TO GO FOR IT AND WIN A MILLION
DOLLARS, YOU ALSO WERE THE FIRST CELEBRITY TO DO IT WITH YOUR FLY
UNZIPPED.
>> OH!
>> Jimmy: YES.
>> THANK YOU. OH, MY WIFE IS GOING TO BE SO
THRILLED WITH ME.
>> Jimmy: YOUR LIFE LINE, YOUR PHONE A FRIEND, CAME THROUGH FOR
YOU.
>> SHE SAVED ME.
>> I CAN'T BELIEVE SHE KNEW THE ANSWER TO THE QUESTION.
SHE DID KNOW THE ANSWER TO THE QUESTION.
>> I HAD NO IDEA WHO BENJAMIN HARRIS WAS.
>> Jimmy: THAT WAS THE CRAZIEST PART OF IT.
I WATCHED IT LAST NIGHT AND OBVIOUSLY I WAS THERE THE FIRST
TIME, AND I SAW THE EDIT OF IT AT ANOTHER TIME.
AND LAST NIGHT I WATCHED IT, I WAS LIKE, HE IS CRAZY.
AT ONE POINT, YOU DON'T KNOW IF HARRISON WAS THE PRESIDENT.
AND THIS QUESTION IS WHICH
PRESIDENT HADLEELEC ELECTRICITYE WHITE HOUSE FIRST.
YOU RISK READY $468,000.
>> I'M AN INSANE PERSON. I WATCHED THAT AND I WAS LIKE,
WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME? I LITERALLY WAS LIKE, I'M GOING
TO CHOOSE HARRISON BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW IF HE IS A PRESIDENT.
THAT WAS MY RATIONALE, AND OBVIOUSLY NINA, TELLING ME, BUT
STILL, WHEN YOU ARE IN THE CHAIR, YOU ARE WRESTLING WITH
YOURSELF. I HAD NO IDEA.
>> Jimmy: YEAH. I KNEW YOU WERE A GAMBLER
BECAUSE YOU WERE ONE OF THE FEW PEOPLE THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY
COUSIN SAL IN LAS VEGAS.
>> I HAVE GONE GAMBLING WITH SAL.
>> Jimmy: AND WHICH OF YOU IS MORE AFFLICTED WOULD YOU SAY?
>> ON THE SPORTS BETTING IT'S DEFINITELY SAL.
>> Jimmy: OKAY.
>> ON THE TABLE GAMES, I HAVE A PROBLEM.
>> Jimmy: YOU HAVE A PROBLEM.
>> YES.
>> Jimmy: IS IT A REAL PROBLEM OR IS IT FUN PROBLEM?
>> LET'S SAY COVID IS GOOD BECAUSE I CAN'T GAMBLE RIGHT NOW.
>> Jimmy: HOW MANY RESTAURANTS IN VEGAS?
>> TWO.
>> Jimmy: TWO NOW, ONE AT THE
COKOS ‐‐ COSMOPOLITAN.
>> AND ONE AT THE VENITIAN.
>> Jimmy: THE CHARITY YOU WON MONEY FOR IS CHRIS SHEPPARD'S
CHARITY, AND HE THEY SUPPORT WH?
>> ANYBODY WHO WOULD SHES IN RESTAURANTS THAT IS EXPERIENCING
FINANCIAL PROBLEMS.
>> Jimmy: IT HAS HIT ANYBODY IN THE COUNTRY.
PEOPLE ARE NOT GETTING STIMULUS CHECKS.
THEY ARE NOT EATING OUT AS. IT BEEN A DOUBLE WHAMY AND I'M
GLAD YOU WON THE MILLION DOLLARS, THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN A
TOUGH ONE.
>> WHOA, I THINK ABOUT IT A LOT. AND AGAIN, IN THAT MOMENT, WHEN
I DECIDED TO GO FOR IT, I'M TALKING TO YOU LIKE THIS.
I DON'T KNOW IF I VERBALIZED IT, I WAS LIKE, EVEN IF I ANSWER IT
INCORRECTLY WHICH WOULD TOTALLY SUCK I WOULD PUT A SPOTLIGHT ON
THE INDUSTRY THROUGH MY EMBARRASSMENT.
>> Jimmy: INTERESTING, THAT'S A WAY TO SPIN YOUR PROBLEM.
DAVID CHANG HAS WHO PODCASTS NOW ON THE RING ER.
YOU HAVE DAVE CHANG SHOW AND WHAT'S THE NEW ONE THAT YOU ARE
DOING?
>> WE HAVE THE RECIPE CLUB.
>> Jimmy: THE RECIPE CLUB.
>> WHERE WE TAKE POPULAR RECIPES AND SEE IF THEY WORK OR DON'T.
>> Jimmy: AND ON TOP OF THAT, YOU HAVE A MEMOIRE CALLED "EAT A
PEACH. DON'T TRY TO CASH THE CHECK.
IT'S JUST A PROBLEM. AND WHO WANTS TO BE A
MILLIONAIRE, YOU GOING TO WATCH IT AGAIN NEXT SUNDAY NIGHT ON
ABC, WE WILL BE BACK WITH RUSSELL DICKERSON.
>> Dicky: THE "JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE" CONCERT SERIES IS
PRESENTED BY MERCEDES‐BENZ. THE BEST OR NOTHING.
♪
>>> Jimmy: THE "JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE" CONCERT SERIES IS
PRESENTED BY MERCEDES‐BENZ. THE BEST OR NOTHING.
>> Jimmy: I WANT TO THANK NATALIE PORTMAN AND CHEF DAVID
CHANG, APOLOGIES TO MATT DAMON. "NIGHTLINE" IS NEXT, FEATURING
OUR PAL MARK ROBER. BUT FIRST, HIS ALBUM IS CALLED
"SOUTHERN SYMPHONY." PLAYING "HOME SWEET,"
RUSSELL DICKERSON!
♪
♪ TOUCHING DOWN
FROM A SIX NIGHT HONEYMOON SUN KISSED KIDS
STILL DRUNK ON LOVE ♪
♪ WENT FROM
ALL‐INCLUSIVE MARGARITAS IN MALIBU ♪
♪ TO PRAYING WE COULD
PAY RENT THIS MONTH THAT DOORMAT SAYS WELCOME HOME ♪
♪ BUT I THINK IT'S
WHEREVER I'M WITH YOU IT'S MORE THAN
SOME BRICKS AND STONES ♪
♪ NO THERE AIN'T
NOTHING LIKE HOME SWEET YOU AND ME ♪
♪ AIN'T GOT MUCH
BUT WE GOT ALL WE NEED WHEREVER THE WIND BLOWS
WHEREVER THIS LIFE GOES ♪
♪ BABY ALL I KNOW
AIN'T NOTHING LIKE NOTHING LIKE
HOME SWEET YOU AND ME ♪
♪ YOUR LOVE IS LIKE
A PORCH SWING ON SUNDAY JUST AS GENTLE
AS A SUMMER SUNRISE ♪
♪ THEY SAY
IT'S WHERE THE HEART IS WELL MINE'S WITH YOU BABE ♪
♪ LONG AS I GOT YOUR HAND
I'M FINE YEAH COULD BE WHITE BRICK
AND PICKET FENCES ♪
♪ OR SOME BUSTED
AC HOTEL ROOM IT'S ALL PICTURE PERFECT
IF YOU'RE IN IT ♪
♪ NO IT DON'T GET
MUCH BETTER THAN HOME SWEET YOU AND ME ♪
♪ AIN'T GOT MUCH
BUT WE GOT ALL WE NEED WHEREVER THE WIND BLOWS
WHEREVER THIS LIFE GOES ♪
♪ BABY ALL I KNOW
AIN'T NOTHING LIKE NOTHING LIKE ♪
♪ HOME SWEET
NOTHING LIKE NOTHING LIKE ♪
♪ YOU AND ME
NOTHING LIKE NOTHING LIKE ♪
♪ HOME SWEET
NOTHING LIKE NOTHING LIKE ♪
♪ YOU AND ME
NOTHING LIKE NOTHING LIKE ♪
♪ A QUARTER ACRE
AND A TWO‐BED FARMHOUSE POLAROID KISS
WITH THE RED SOLD SIGN ♪
♪ SITTING ON BOXES
IN THE LIVING ROOM LAUGHING AND CRYING ♪
♪ JUST STARING AT THEM
TWO PINK LINES HUH OOH YEAH ♪
♪ TIME TO MAKE
A LITTLE MORE ROOM IN OUR HOME SWEET YOU AND ME ♪
♪ YEAH WE GOT IT ALL
AND YOU'RE STILL ALL I NEED WHEREVER THE WIND BLOWS
WHEREVER THIS LIFE GOES ♪
♪ BABY ALL I KNOW
AIN'T NOTHING LIKE NOTHING LIKE ♪
♪ HOME SWEET
NOTHING LIKE NOTHING LIKE ♪
♪ YOU AND ME
NOTHING LIKE NOTHING LIKE ♪
♪ HOME SWEET
NOTHING LIKE NOTHING LIKE ♪
♪ YOU AND ME
YEAH NOTHING LIKE NOTHING LIKE ♪
♪ NOTHING LIKE
NOTHING LIKE NOTHING LIKE NOTHING LIKE ♪
♪