CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP
- HA HA HA HA HA HA!
- THE CALL IS COMING FROM INSIDE THE HOUSE.
- RAHHH!
- AAAAAHHH!
- AAAAAAHHH!
WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR FACE?
- DUDE, I'M, LIKE, 15. WE ALL LOOK LIKE THIS.
WHAT ARE YOU, MY MOM?
- NO, I'M THE BOOGIE MAN.
- I DON'T EVEN BELIEVE IN YOU. GO TALK TO MY LITTLE BROTHER.
- YEAH, GO TO BED. SHEESH.
WHEN DID KIDS GET SO HARD TO SCARE?
I BLAME CARTOONS AND VIDEO GAMES AND THE TUBA.
WHAT HAPPENED TO THE GOOD OLD DAYS
WHEN THE MERE MENTION OF THE BOOGIE MAN
COULD SULLY EVEN THE WHITEST UNDIES?
[SLURP] AHHH.
MAN, I HAVEN'T HAD TIMES LIKE THAT
SINCE MIDDLE SCHOOL.
AH, THE OLD MIDDLE SCHOOL YEARBOOK.
OH, YES, THE GRIM REAPER...
ALWAYS THINKING HE WAS SCARIER THAN ME.
CHUMP.
MAYBE IT'S TIME TO RELIVE SOME OF THE OLD GLORY DAYS.
YES. AH HA HA HA!
- AH, SHUT UP! I'M TRYING TO SLEEP!
- WELCOME BACK TO THE SUPPERTIME SURGERY NETWORK.
- THIS SHOW IS AWESOME.
- HEY, DOC, WHAT ARE YOU DOIN' WITH MY LEGS?
AAAAHHHH!
- OH, STOP IT. I'M JUST SHAVING YOU.
- SO, THIS IS WHERE GRIM LIVES.
LET'S SEE WHAT HE THINKS OF ME SCARING THESE TWO KIDS TO DEATH.
HERE WE GO.
- OK, MRS. STEVENSON. ONE MORE STITCH.
OOP, SORRY ABOUT THAT.
- RRHOOAR!
- HEY, BILLY, IS THIS A NEW TV?
- ROOOAR!
- COOL.
- ROOAR!
- REWIND.
- WHAT? - I GOTTA SEE THAT AGAIN.
FAST FORWARD.
REWIND.
FAST FORWARD.
REWIND.
- WAIT, WAIT, WAIT.
I'M SORRY, CHILD, BUT IS THIS THE GRIM REAPER HOME?
- ♪ OH, GRIM
- WHO DARES DISTURB THE GRIM REAPER?
'CAUSE I HAVE BILLY BISCUITS.
- BILLY BISCUITS!
AAARRRUUUGHA!
GGGGGRRRR... BILLY BISCUITS!
[SNORT, SNORT, SNIFFLE, SNIFFLE]
OHHH, THEY FEEL CHOCOLATY.
OH, GRIM, THE TV WANTS TO TALK TO YOU.
- TV?
- HELLO, GRIM.
- HELLO, TV.
- HMM.
HA HA!
- BOOGIE! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
- WHAT? AN OLD CLASSMATE CAN'T SWING BY AND SAY HELLO?
- NO. I THOUGHT I WAS DONE WITH YOU AFTER GRADUATION.
- HEY, GRIM, WHO'S THE STIFF?
- YOU MAY KNOW HIM AS THE BOOGIE MAN.
HE WAS THE WORST BULLY IN SCHOOL.
HE USED TO TORMENT ALL THE KIDS AND MAKE US LOOK LIKE IDIOTS.
- WOW! BEEN THERE.
- OH, COME NOW, GRIM. THINGS WEREN'T THAT BAD.
- DON'T BELIEVE HIM, KIDS. BOOGIE WAS THE WORST.
ONE TIME I HAD A RECITAL IN FRONT OF THE WHOLE CLASS.
- PUT YOUR HANDS TOGETHER FOR GRIM.
- GOOD LUCK, GRIM.
- I DON'T NEED LUCK. I PRACTICED.
- WELL, I HOPE YOU PRACTICED YOUR HUMILITY.
- TO BE OR NOT TO BE. THAT IS THE QUESTION.
- I THINK YOU MEAN, WEDGIE OR NO WEDGIE.
- OWWWW!
- WEDGIE!
- HEY, EVERYONE, GRIM JUST GOT A NUCLEAR WEDGIE.
LET'S ALL POINT AND LAUGH AT HIS HUMILIATION.
- HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!
- BOY.
- I NEVER LIVED THAT DOWN.
EVERYONE CALLED ME WEDGIE SHAKESPEARE.
- WELL, ALL THIS REMINISCING HAS BEEN GREAT,
BUT I JUST STOPPED BY FOR A FEW THINGS.
NICE SEEIN' YOU, JERK.
- WHAT JUST HAPPENED?
- A DARK FIGURE FROM THE UNDERWORLD TOOK BILLY,
FREEING UP MY AFTERNOON.
- OOF! THAT'S IT. I'VE HAD IT!
- WHAT? IT'S ONLY BILLY.
- THAT'S NOT THE POINT.
I'M TIRED OF BEING BOOGIE'S PUNCHING BAG.
I'M GONNA TEACH HIM A LESSON ONCE AND FOR ALL!
AAUGGH!
- WELL, MANDY, IT'S JUST YOU AND ME NOW.
- UH... NO.
- YET ANOTHER NIGHT OF ONE-MAN TWISTER?
- ARE YOU READY FOR A ROLLER COASTER RIDE
OF PURE TERROR?
- I LOVE ROLLER COASTERS!
- WELL, THEN, YOU'LL LOVE THIS.
- I LOVE THIS!
TERROR!
I WONDER WHAT TERROR IS?
IT SOUNDS LIKE CHOCOLATE.
OOOHHHH, PRICKLY!
HELLO? HELLO-OOOO?!
- GRRRRR... - BOOGIE?
GRIM? HELLO-OOOO?
AHHHH!
- [SHRIEKING]
- SO, WHAT'S YOUR PLAN?
- I'M GOING TO PULL A TRICK ON BOOGIE AND TEACH HIM A LESSON.
- AND HOW DO YOU PLAN TO DO THAT?
- HMM. I HAVE AN IDEA.
HMM. NOT THE SODA, NOT THE PURPLE STUFF.
AH, BOOGIE'S MILK.
HERE, HOLD THIS.
- GIVE ME THE MILK.
- YOU KNOW, THERE ARE BETTER WAYS TO GET REVENGE.
- DON'T WORRY. I SAW THIS IN THE HALLOWEEN SPECIAL.
- WELL, WELL, IF IT ISN'T THE GRIM REAPER
AND HIS LITTLE MASTER.
WHAT'S WRONG, GRIM?
COME BACK TO SAVE THE BIG-NOSED BRAT?
- I CAME FOR AN APOLOGY FOR ALL THE TORTURE YOU PUT ME THROUGH.
- AND WE PROBABLY SHOULD BRING BILLY BACK.
- BUT MOSTLY WE WANT AN APOLOGY.
- WHY, GRIM, I HAD NO IDEA YOU WERE SO... TORTURED.
WOW. I AM SO SORRY.
I JOKED WITH YOU BECAUSE I RESPECTED YOU.
ALL I WANTED WAS A FRIEND;
SOMEONE WHO WOULD HANG OUT WITH ME AND BUY ME THINGS.
[WHIMPERING]
- OH, IT'S OK, BOOGIE.
- NO, GRIM, I WAS WRONG, AND I AM SORRY.
YOU KNOW WHAT?
HERE, TAKE THIS MILK AS A TOKEN OF OUR NEW FRIENDSHIP, BUDDY.
- OH, THANK YOU, BOOGIE.
- UH, GRIM...
- AHH.
- OH, HE'S GOOD.
- YEAH, I GUESS HE IS PRETTY GOOD.
- HE REALLY THOUGHT THAT HOT SAUCE BIT WAS GONNA GET ME, HUH?
- YEP.
- YOU MAKE THIS TOO EASY, GRIM.
- HEY, EVERYBODY, GRIM IS HANGING BY HIS UNDERWEAR
FROM THE CLOCK.
LET'S ALL LAUGH AT HIS HUMILIATION.
- HA HA HA HA HA HA!
- BOOGIE! WHERE YOU GOIN', PRINCESS?
THIS ISN'T OVER.
- [CLUCKING]
- WHAT'S WRONG, BOOGIE?
- [EXCITED CLUCKING]
- ARE YA... ARE YA... ARE YA... YA...
ARE YA SCARED LIKE SOME SORT OF SMALL, TASTY BIRD?
- ME? SCARED? I AM THE ESSENCE OF SCARY ITSELF.
EVERYBODY FEARS THE BOOGIE MAN.
- ONLY TILL THEY'RE LIKE 11.
THEN THEY'RE MINE.
- I WAS ALWAYS SCARIER THAN YOU.
- GRRRRRRR! - GRRRRRRR!
- OK, LADIES,
LOOKS LIKE WE'RE GOING TO HAVE A SCARE-OFF.
IN THIS CHALLENGE, YOU WILL EACH SCARE ONE LITTLE KID.
THE ONE WHO SCARES THE KID MOST WINS.
- OK, BUT IF I WIN, NO MORE BOOGIE, EVER!
- GRIM...
- ALL RIGHT. AND WE GET BILLY BACK.
- OK, BUT IF I WIN, YOU DISAPPEAR,
AND I BECOME THE BOOGIE REAPER.
HA HA HA HA HEEE!
- FINE. JUST CHOOSE YOUR WEAPON.
- OK. RHARRRR! RRHARRR! RRHAARRR!
- A WEREWOLF. HOW PASSE.
- WELL, WHAT ABOUT YOU, CHUMP?
- QUACK, QUACK.
- WHAT? A DUCK?
- QUACK, QUACK.
- OH, YOU'LL SEE.
- THE GENTLE ELEPHANT
DELICATELY MEANDERS DOWN THE FOREST PATH.
♪ HMM-HMM-HMMM THE ELEPHANT STOPS,
PERHAPS SENSING DANGER.
THEN, ALL OF A SUDDEN,
THE KIND ELEPHANT SHOOTS IN THE AIR,
AND HIS HEAD SNAPS OFF!
HA HA HA HA HA!
- JASON, HAVE YOU SEEN DOMINIQUE'S RETAINER?
- NO.
RETAIN THAT.
[FARTING NOISE]
DID I DO THAT?
[FARTING NOISE]
- RHARRR.
RHHOOOARRR!
ROAR?
- DOGGIE!
OH, AND NOW THAT I HAVE A DOGGIE,
I WON'T HAVE TO ACT OUT TO GET ATTENTION.
[FARTING NOISE]
- QUACK, QUACK.
QUACK, QUACK.
QUACK, QUACK, QUACK, QUACK.
QUACK, QUACK.
QUACK, QUACK, QUACK, QUACK.
AAACCKK, AAACKK, AKKK, AKKK.
AACCCKK, AKKK, ACKKK, AAACKKK.
RHHHHOOOOOOOAAAARRRRHH!
BOO.
- AAAAAHHHH!
MAMA!
- WELL, BOOGIE, LOOKS LIKE I WIN.
AND YOU REMEMBER OUR DEAL.
YOU'RE GONE FOREVER.
- OH, COME ON, GRIM. WE'RE BUDDIES.
- GOOD-BYE... BUDDY.
- WELL, GOOD WORK, GRIM, BUT WE FORGOT BILLY.
- DID WE, MANDY?
DID WE?
- HEE HEE HEE HEE!
TERROR IS FUN!
YEEE, OOOHH, HEE HEE HEE!
- [GASPING]
- AAAAAAAAHHHHH!
- HEY, SLUGGIE MONSTER, YOU GOTS A BOOGIE IN YOUR NOSE!
HA HA HA HA HA!
A BOOGIE! I SAID BOOGIE!
- NOW THAT'S-A WHAT I CALL A SANDWICH.
- LOOK AT THIS DING-DONG MESS.
EVERYTHING IS ALL STICKY.
- [MEOW]
- MAN, I HOPE YOU DON'T EXPECT ME
TO CLEAN UP ALL THIS FILTH.
- THIS ISN'T FILTH. IT'S OUR PICNIC FIXINGS.
- PICNIC? OH, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.
NO.
YOU REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENED LAST TIME, DON'T YOU?
- PLEASE PASS THE EGG SALAD.
- BRAGGLE-FRAGGLE!
- AAH! SOMEBODY HELP ME!
YEAH, THAT WAS PRETTY SPECIAL.
WANT TO SEE MY EMOTIONAL SCARS?
- WHAT HAPPENED IN HERE? DID THE REFRIGERATOR THROW UP?
- BILLY WANTS US TO GO ON A PICNIC.
- NO WAY, JOSE.
YOU REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENED LAST TIME.
- PLEASE PASS THE EGG SALAD.
- BRAGGLE-FRAGGLE!
- AAH! SOMEBODY HELP ME!
- HAVE YOU CRAZY KIDS BEEN FLASHING BACK IN HERE?
- YEAH.
WE'VE BEEN TRYING TO TALK BILLY OUT OF GOING ON A PICNIC.
- A PICNIC! OH, HONEY, NO, NO.
YOU REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENED LAST TIME.
- PLEASE PASS THE EGG SALAD.
- BRAGGLE-FRAGGLE!
- AAH! SOMEBODY HELP ME!
- WHAT IS THIS, A PARTY?
- DAD, TALK SOME SENSE INTO YOUR SON.
HE WANTS TO GO ON A PICNIC.
- AFTER WHAT HAPPENED LAST TIME?
YOU ALL REMEMBER THAT, RIGHT?
- PLEASE PASS THE EGG SALAD.
- BRAGGLE-FRAGGLE!
- AAH! SOMEBODY HELP ME!
- HEE HEE HEE HEE! I SAY WE LET THE BOY GO.
- ROCK ON!
THIS IS GONNA BE THE BEST PICNIC EVER!
WHO'S READY FOR FUN?
[CRICKETS CHIRPING]
WELL, THEY DON'T KNOW WHAT THEY'RE MISSING.
♪ WALKIN' IN THE WOODS, WALKIN' IN THE WOODS ♪
♪ JUST LOOKIN' FOR A PLACE WHERE TO EAT ALL MY FOODS ♪
- PSSST! PSSSST!
HEY, LITTLE GIRL. COME HERE FOR A SECOND.
THAT'S A NICE PIC-A-NIC BASKET YOU GOT THERE.
- YEAH, IT'S OK.
[BIRDS CHIRPING]
- YOU GOT SOME NICE SANDWICHES IN THERE, I BET.
- SURE, I SUPPOSE.
- I THINK THIS IS A GOOD PLACE FOR YOUR PIC-A-NIC.
- UH, I DON'T KNOW.
- HERE, LET ME SET IT UP FOR YOU.
- DID YOU GET THE FOOD YET, YOGI?
- SSSSHHH!
- LOOK, I REALLY GOTS TO GET GOING.
- HEY, THAT'S COOL, MAN. LET ME JUST...
GIVE ME THAT BASKET!
- [PANTING]
- DON'T LET HIM GET AWAY!
- LLWWW-LLWWWOOOL-WLLWOOW!
[SNIFFING]
I KNOW YOU'RE CLOSE, YOU DIRTY HUMAN.
- HEY, I'M NOT DIRTY. I JUST HAD A BATH 15 DAYS AGO.
OOOP!
AAAAAAHHH! AAAAH!
- HEY, YOU DUMB BEARS. YOU CAN'T GET ME NOW.
I'M IN A CAVE.
- HE'S RIGHT, BOO-BOO.
WE BEARS ARE TERRIBLY AFRAID OF CAVES.
- WHY ARE WE SO LAME, YOGI?
- WOW! A GIANT DOOR.
AND THERE APPEARS TO BE SOME SORT
OF ANCIENT WRITING ON IT.
"FOR A GOOD TIME CALL..."
- WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
WHO SAID YOU COULD READ OUR SACRED DOOR?
HANDS IN THE AIR, YOU DIRTY, STINKIN' ELF.
- WHAT IS IT WITH EVERYONE CALLING ME DIRTY?
I OUGHTA... [SNIFFING]
OH.
- THOUGHT YOU COULD SNEAK UP ON US, DID YOU, ELF?
- NO. - SHUT UP.
YOUR SMOOTH ELF TALK WON'T WORK ON ME.
- OK. - SHUT UP.
YOU'RE ABOUT TO ENTER THE DWARVIN MINES OF BORINGYA.
GUARDED FOR 3,000 YEARS BY ULIK AND MULIK,
THE GIANT, BLIND CAVE FISH.
- WAIT. - WHO SAID THAT?
- IS SOMEONE THERE?
- HELLO?
- AND HERE WE HAVE THE DWARVIN CLOSET OF CLEANING SUPPLIES,
WHICH HOUSES THE MOP OF FALTHIG
THAT WAS USED TO CLEAN UP THE PUKE
AFTER THE GREAT CELEBRATION OF MOTHROGDAL.
THAT GUY IN THE CORNER NEXT TO THE BLEACH IS OUR KING.
AND THIS IS OUR KING'S FRIENDSHIP BRACELET,
GIVEN TO HIM BY A GIRL NAMED AMY WHO HAS A CRUSH ON HIM, BUT...
- ENOUGH!
WHY IS THERE A STRANGER
IN THE DWARVIN CLOSET OF CLEANING SUPPLIES?
- YOUR HIGHNESS,
I CAPTURED THIS ELF SPYING ON US.
- HMM.
- PHHHFFTHT.
- HMM.
[SQUEAK]
THIS IS NO ELF.
'TIS A HUMAN.
- A HUMAN?
- TELL ME, WHAT IS YOUR NAME?
- ROOT ROT.
- NOT YOU, DUMMY! THE HUMAN!
- BILLY, SIR.
- WELL, BILLY, I AM KING BEARDBOTTOM.
WELCOME TO THE LAND OF THE DWARVES.
WE'RE THE WORLD'S LARGEST SUPPLIER OF MUSHROOMS AND MUSHROOM PRODUCTS...
STUFFED MUSHROOMS, FRIED MUSHROOMS,
MUSHROOM PIZZA.
HERE, TRY IT.
- IT TASTES LIKE MY CAT.
- THEY TASTE LIKE EVERYONE'S CAT.
IT'S BEEN 3,000 YEARS, AND I STILL HATE THE TASTE.
I'VE EATEN SO MANY MUSHROOMS, EVEN MY SWEAT SMELLS LIKE 'EM.
TAKE A WHIFF.
- WHEW! YOU AIN'T KIDDIN'.
- AND IT'S ALL BECAUSE OF THOSE THIEVING ELVES
WITH THEIR BEARDLESS FACES
AND THEIR INTOXICATING AROMA OF SUMMER LILAC.
CURSE THEM! CURSE THEM ALL!
- TELL ME THE STORY OF YOUR RAGE.
- VERY WELL. IT WAS MANY, MANY YEARS AGO,
AFTER THE GREAT BATTLE FOR MIDWESTERN EARTH HAD BEEN WON.
A COUNCIL OF REPRESENTATIVES FROM EACH RACE
MET TO DIVIDE UP THE FOOD SERVICE INDUSTRY.
- ALL RIGHT, I JUST WANT TO MAKE SURE
WE'RE ALL TOTALLY CLEAR ON WHO'S IN CHARGE OF WHAT.
MANKIND GETS THE HAMBURGER BUSINESS.
THE DRUIDS ARE IN CHARGE OF LENTILS AND SOY.
THE HALFLINGS WILL MAKE CHICKEN NUGGETS.
THE ELVES ARE IN CHARGE OF MUSHROOMS,
AND FINALLY, THE DWARVES WILL BAKE THE COOKIES.
- PARDON ME. IF I COULD JUST INTERJECT FOR A MOMENT.
- THE FLOOR IS OPEN TO DADDY ELF.
- IT SEEMS TO ME LIKE THE CAMERA TOOK THE PICTURE,
BUT THE FLASH DIDN'T GO OFF.
I MEAN, REALLY, NOW, BEARDBOTTOM.
CAN YOU HONESTLY TELL ME YOU'D BE HAPPY
SPENDING THE REST OF YOUR LIFE STANDING IN FRONT OF A HOT OVEN
WHILE WEARING A STARCHED WHITE APRON?
- WELL, NO, BUT...
- LET ME SEE YOUR ARM FOR A SECOND.
LOOK AT THESE THICK, SINEWY MUSCLES
AND THESE BULGING, COMPACT THIGHS.
- SO, UM, YOUR POINT IS?
- QUITE SIMPLY, THIS.
WHO'S BETTER SUITED TO THE EXCITING,
PHYSICALLY REWARDING TASK
OF CHOPPING DOWN GIANT MUSHROOMS...
LITTLE TINY ME OR GREAT BIG YOU?
- OOOH! OOOH! I AM! I AM!
- SO, IT'S SETTLED.
THE ELVES GET THE COOKIES,
AND THE DWARVES GET THE STINKY FUNGUS.
- WAIT A SECOND. HOLD UP.
HOW CAN YOU BE MAD AT THE ELVES?
YOU CHOSE TO TRADE COOKIES FOR MUSHROOMS.
- HEY, DID THAT KID JUST STEP INTO THE FLASHBACK?
- WHAT MANNER OF SORCERY BE THIS?
- I'M MAD BECAUSE THEY GOT RICH!
THEY KNEW THE COOKIE BUSINESS
WAS A TRILLION-DOLLAR GROWTH INDUSTRY.
- NO, WE DIDN'T.
- YES, YOU DID. - NO, WE DIDN'T.
- YES, YOU DID.
- NO, WE DIDN'T.
- AAAAUGH!
ENOUGH! THIS FLASHBACK IS OVER!
BILLY THE HUMAN,
WILL YOU NOT AID US IN OUR GREAT UPCOMING BATTLE?
- WAIT. WHAT BATTLE?
WHERE'D THAT COME FROM?
- DIDN'T I MENTION THE BATTLE EARLIER?
- NO.
- THE BIG FINAL ASSAULT
ON THE ELVES' COOKIE FACTORY
WE'VE BEEN PLANNING?
OH. WELL, YEAH.
THERE'S GONNA BE A BIG BATTLE!
SO, YOU WANNA HELP US?
- OK. SURE.
- THIS IS A HOLOGRAM OF THE ELVES' FACTORY.
- COOL.
- AS YOU CAN SEE, IT'S SURROUNDED BY...
KNOCK IT OFF!
- SORRY, KING.
- IT'S SURROUNDED BY A DWARF-REPELLING FORCE FIELD.
THAT'S WHERE YOU COME IN.
- OH, BOY!
- WE NEED YOU TO INFILTRATE THE FACTORY
DISGUISED AS AN ELF
AND THEN DISABLE THE SHIELDS.
- THAT SOUNDS DANGEROUS.
- IF WE WIN, YOU'LL GET ALL THE COOKIES YOU CAN EAT.
- WELL, WHAT ARE WE WAITIN' FOR?
- MAY THE WINDS OF POOKROOD FLY YOU SAFELY, BILLY.
- LAVE EN SUS MANOS!
- LAVA BLAH MA BLAH!
- I WONDER HOW BILLY'S PICNIC IS GOING?
- HEY, GRIM. HEY, MANDY.
- THAT ANSWERS ONE QUESTION, YET RAISES SO MANY OTHERS.
- OOMPH!
- CARAMEL PECAN CRUNCH? DOUBLE CHOCOLATE MACADAMIA?
OATMEAL CRANBERRY RAISIN?
NO!
- WHAT IF WE DRIZZLED WHITE CHOCOLATE?
- EXCUSE ME, WHERE'S THE FORCE FIELD GENERATOR?
- OHH! NEXT TO THE CAPPUCCINO MACHINE WHERE IT'S ALWAYS BEEN.
- THANKS.
- AND, STEVIE JOE,
DON'T EVEN THINK OF BRINGING UP TOFFEE BITS.
YOU KNOW HOW I FEEL ABOUT... WHAT?
STOP! DO YOU REALIZE WHAT YOU'VE JUST DONE?
- NOT REALLY.
[BOOM]
- THE DWARVES ARE TRYING TO BREAK IN!
- HEAVE!
- HO!
- HEAVE!
- HO!
- HEY, THAT WAS AN ANTIQUE DOOR.
- ALL RIGHT, LISTEN UP, YOU LITTLE RADISH-MUNCHERS!
THIS BATTLE IS ABOUT TO BECOME WAY TOO EXCITING
TO SHOW OUR YOUNGER VIEWERS!
SO INSTEAD, I WILL SHOW YOU THIS SOOTHING IMAGE
UNTIL THE FIGHT IS OVER.
SWEET MOTHER OF FOG!
YOU SHOULD SEE THIS.
COOKIES AND MUSHROOMS FLYING THROUGH THE AIR
LIKE JUNE BUGS IN A SWAMP!
WHEW! IT APPEARS TO BE OVER.
LET'S GO BACK TO THE... WHOA!
THAT WAS ENTIRELY MY BAD.
I MISREAD THE SIGNALS.
I KNEW A GUY NAMED JOE.
HE MISREAD THE SIGNALS IN A COMBAT SITUATION.
NOW HE EATS EVERYTHING THROUGH A MECHANICAL STRAW.
WAIT. BATTLE'S OVER.
CARRY ON.
- [MOANING]
- COOKIE DOUGH TOO SWEET.
- DIRTY, DIRTY DWARF!
- BEARDLESS ELF!
- STOP IT! STOP THE FIGHTING!
WHY DO YOU HAVE TO HATE EACH OTHER?
CAN'T YOU SEE YOU'RE JUST LIKE PEAS AND MASHED POTATOES?
SOME PEOPLE DON'T LIKE THEM TO TOUCH EACH OTHER
IF THEY'RE ON THE SAME PLATE, BUT IT'S OK.
IT'S OK IF THEY TOUCH,
BECAUSE THEY BOTH GET CHEWED UP BY THE MOUTH
AND SENT DOWN THE ESOPHAGUS
AND DISSOLVED INTO THE STOMACH AND ABSORBED IN THE INTESTINE,
AND WE WON'T GO ANY FURTHER THAN THAT.
BUT THE POINT IS, WE'RE ALL JUST NUTRIENTS
IN THE GREAT BIG DIGESTIVE SYSTEM CALLED LIFE!
- HERE'S AN IDEA.
WHAT IF WE PUT YOUR MUSHROOMS IN OUR COOKIES?
- SPLIT THE PROFITS 50-50?
- 60-40. - DEAL.
- HOORAY!
THIS CALLS FOR A KARAOKE.
♪ BETTER THAN CANDY, YOU'RE SO DANDY ♪
♪ BUTTERCUP DANCER, I LOVE YOU ♪
- OH, CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES AGAIN?
WHEN IS SOMEONE GONNA COME OUT WITH A NEW COOKIE?
- TEN-HUT!
WHINING GETS YOU NOTHIN' EXCEPT THIS!
- WOW! MUSHOOKIES!
WHAT ARE THESE?
- MUSHOOKIES ARE THE MAGIC THAT HAPPENS
WHEN BEARDLESS ELVES
AND SWARTHY DWARVES WORK TOGETHER.
CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP
- THEY TASTE LIKE MY CAT!
- NEW MUSHOOKIES.
YOU'D HAVE TO BE MESHUGENEH NOT TO LOVE 'EM.
CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE. www.ncicap.org...