1
00:00:03,045 --> 00:00:05,214
(theme music playing)
2
00:00:07,883 --> 00:00:10,469
Let me ask you something.
You happy with your color?
3
00:00:10,552 --> 00:00:12,971
Fuckin' love my color.
Fuckin' mahogany.
4
00:00:13,055 --> 00:00:14,640
‐Yeah. You're mahogany.
‐Yeah.
5
00:00:14,723 --> 00:00:15,766
Hell, yeah.
6
00:00:15,849 --> 00:00:17,684
‐You happy
with your color?
‐No.
7
00:00:17,768 --> 00:00:20,229
‐Huh? No?
‐Ah, well, what is it?
What is it?
8
00:00:20,312 --> 00:00:22,189
You're like
a... a porridge,
9
00:00:22,272 --> 00:00:24,816
a cream of wheat,
a farina, that kind of shit.
10
00:00:24,900 --> 00:00:26,818
‐That's what white
people's skin tone is.
‐Right.
11
00:00:26,902 --> 00:00:28,987
‐It's just different
kinds of hot cereal.
‐Right, right.
12
00:00:29,071 --> 00:00:31,281
Black people,
your skin tone's like,
13
00:00:31,365 --> 00:00:33,408
it depends on
the amount of milk
you put in the coffee.
14
00:00:33,492 --> 00:00:35,577
Fuckin' right.
I'm like
a fuckin' Yoo‐hoo.
15
00:00:35,661 --> 00:00:38,455
‐I shake that motherfucker up.
I'm shakin' it up.
‐Yoo‐hoo's a good color.
16
00:00:38,539 --> 00:00:40,457
‐Fuckin' good color. Shit.
‐Yeah, Yoo‐hoo's
a really good color.
17
00:00:40,541 --> 00:00:42,501
‐Yeah.
‐(laughing)
18
00:00:42,584 --> 00:00:43,835
‐(clanks)
‐What?
19
00:00:43,919 --> 00:00:45,337
There you go.
20
00:00:45,420 --> 00:00:46,672
‐(clatters)
‐Somewhere between‐‐
21
00:00:46,755 --> 00:00:48,257
‐Wait, excuse me?
‐What the‐‐ what the fuck?
22
00:00:48,340 --> 00:00:50,217
♪
23
00:00:52,803 --> 00:00:54,763
Hey. Larry.
24
00:00:55,264 --> 00:00:56,890
‐Randi. Yeah.
‐You got it.
25
00:00:56,974 --> 00:00:59,935
‐I'm a friend of Susie's.
‐I know, I know, I know.
Yeah.
26
00:01:00,018 --> 00:01:01,228
Happy New Year.
27
00:01:01,311 --> 00:01:02,312
Eh.
28
00:01:02,396 --> 00:01:03,689
It's a little late, frankly,
29
00:01:03,772 --> 00:01:05,190
for the "Happy New Years,"
you know?
30
00:01:05,274 --> 00:01:07,484
Why? It just happened
a couple of weeks ago, right?
31
00:01:07,567 --> 00:01:08,402
Yeah, that's too long.
32
00:01:08,485 --> 00:01:10,195
The statute of limitations
33
00:01:10,279 --> 00:01:12,072
has kind of run out
on the "New Years."
34
00:01:12,155 --> 00:01:14,533
‐Three days. Plenty.
‐Three days?
35
00:01:14,616 --> 00:01:16,868
By the way,
everything doesn't
have to be happy.
36
00:01:16,952 --> 00:01:18,537
Why does everything
have to be happy?
37
00:01:18,620 --> 00:01:21,290
‐I'm having a pretty good day.
‐Yeah. Look at you.
38
00:01:21,373 --> 00:01:23,375
‐That's, that's huge.
‐Yeah, I'm about eight months.
39
00:01:23,458 --> 00:01:26,628
If you need some name tips,
I'm your guy.
40
00:01:26,712 --> 00:01:28,422
‐Yeah.
‐What would you suggest?
41
00:01:28,505 --> 00:01:30,591
Maybe something, uh,
Swedish, perhaps?
42
00:01:30,674 --> 00:01:32,759
Yeah, I'm... my husband
is African‐American,
43
00:01:32,843 --> 00:01:35,470
so I'm not sure that would,
I don't know, gel.
44
00:01:36,054 --> 00:01:37,973
You like saying that,
don't you.
45
00:01:38,056 --> 00:01:40,892
‐Do I like saying that
he's African‐American?
‐Yeah.
46
00:01:40,976 --> 00:01:42,477
I think you wanted me to know.
47
00:01:42,561 --> 00:01:44,229
Does it change your
opinion of me?
48
00:01:44,313 --> 00:01:47,065
In some ways, yes.
In some ways, no.
49
00:01:47,149 --> 00:01:48,442
‐Okay.
‐All right.
50
00:01:48,525 --> 00:01:50,694
Enjoy your workout.
51
00:01:52,112 --> 00:01:53,822
(beeping)
52
00:01:55,449 --> 00:01:58,619
(beeping continues)
53
00:02:03,498 --> 00:02:05,292
What are you doing?
54
00:02:06,293 --> 00:02:07,419
What?
55
00:02:07,502 --> 00:02:09,713
What's with the‐‐
What's with the jogging?
56
00:02:09,796 --> 00:02:12,132
I'm... I'm working out.
57
00:02:12,215 --> 00:02:14,176
‐Working out?
‐Yeah.
58
00:02:14,426 --> 00:02:16,887
You, you're jostling
the fetus.
59
00:02:17,512 --> 00:02:19,765
You can't‐‐
You can't run
in your condition.
60
00:02:19,848 --> 00:02:21,642
Uh, yes, I can.
61
00:02:21,725 --> 00:02:22,976
I was advised by my midwife
62
00:02:23,060 --> 00:02:24,603
that I should continue
to work out.
63
00:02:24,686 --> 00:02:26,438
Maybe you want to
consult your blacksmith.
64
00:02:26,521 --> 00:02:27,981
See what he has
to say about it.
65
00:02:28,065 --> 00:02:31,401
Oh, I don't, uh, want
to get into it with you,
but, um...
66
00:02:31,485 --> 00:02:33,945
my fetus, my problem, okay?
67
00:02:34,029 --> 00:02:37,074
‐I pity that fetus.
‐(machine beeping)
68
00:02:37,157 --> 00:02:39,242
Larry:
Oh, my God.
I can't watch this.
69
00:02:41,036 --> 00:02:44,164
‐Happy New Year.
‐Yeah, Happy New Year.
70
00:02:48,627 --> 00:02:50,670
(slapping)
71
00:02:55,550 --> 00:02:58,512
‐(slapping)
‐Hey, hey, hey. Come on.
Come on, man.
72
00:02:58,804 --> 00:03:01,765
‐You gotta stay dry.
‐You're over‐talcing here.
73
00:03:01,848 --> 00:03:03,600
‐Ugh!
‐Happy New Year.
74
00:03:03,683 --> 00:03:04,810
Yeah, yeah.
75
00:03:04,893 --> 00:03:06,686
‐I couldn't even
breathe in there.
‐Right.
76
00:03:06,770 --> 00:03:09,689
He was putting talc
under his arm,
77
00:03:09,773 --> 00:03:12,484
‐on his balls...
It was disgusting.
‐(laughing)
78
00:03:12,567 --> 00:03:15,445
‐I mean, who still uses that?
‐I use that shit all the time.
79
00:03:15,529 --> 00:03:19,157
‐Can't be good for you.
‐Not if you're allergic to it.
80
00:03:19,241 --> 00:03:20,909
My Auntie Rey
put some of that shit on her,
81
00:03:20,992 --> 00:03:22,494
and went into
anaphylactic shock.
82
00:03:22,577 --> 00:03:24,913
‐Really?
‐Yeah. Started shakin' and shit.
Took her to the ER.
83
00:03:24,996 --> 00:03:27,791
‐Man, they had to pump
her stomach for nothing.
‐That's incredible.
84
00:03:27,874 --> 00:03:29,251
Yeah, man.
85
00:03:29,334 --> 00:03:31,753
‐Look at this guy
in the MAGA hat.
‐Boy. You don't see...
86
00:03:31,837 --> 00:03:35,006
‐You don't see many of those
in LA, do you?
‐You fuckin' don't.
87
00:03:35,090 --> 00:03:38,176
Know what I noticed?
No one ever wears
those hats on backwards.
88
00:03:38,260 --> 00:03:40,595
If mean, if you're gonna
get your ass kicked,
you want to see it coming.
89
00:03:40,679 --> 00:03:42,097
‐(chuckles)
‐I like that.
90
00:03:42,180 --> 00:03:45,100
‐Yeah.
‐Mocha‐‐ Mocha Joe's
91
00:03:45,183 --> 00:03:46,768
Mocha Joe.
I know a Mocha Joe.
92
00:03:46,852 --> 00:03:48,729
‐You want some coffee?
‐Sure. Okay.
93
00:03:48,812 --> 00:03:50,397
‐Let's go in here.
‐Get a little latte.
94
00:03:50,480 --> 00:03:52,274
‐Thank you so much.
I appreciate it.
‐Thank you.
95
00:03:52,357 --> 00:03:53,525
Have a great day.
96
00:03:53,608 --> 00:03:56,862
‐Whoa! Blast from the past.
‐Oh, boy, oh, boy.
97
00:03:56,945 --> 00:03:58,613
‐Larry David. Wow.
‐Mocha Joe!
98
00:03:58,697 --> 00:04:00,991
‐Long time, no see, man.
What are you doin' here?
‐Hey!
99
00:04:01,074 --> 00:04:02,284
‐What's your name?
‐Leon.
100
00:04:02,367 --> 00:04:04,202
‐Leon. Nice to meet you.
‐This is unreal.
101
00:04:04,286 --> 00:04:06,079
Do you believe it? Huh?
What can I get you guys?
102
00:04:06,163 --> 00:04:07,622
I'll get a‐‐
Do you have scones?
103
00:04:07,706 --> 00:04:09,082
Yeah. Right there.
They're beautiful.
104
00:04:09,166 --> 00:04:11,001
Great. I'll have a scone,
and a, uh, cup of coffee.
105
00:04:11,084 --> 00:04:13,628
‐Cup of coffee and a scone.
What about you, Leon?
‐Let me get a latte.
106
00:04:13,712 --> 00:04:15,922
All right. One scone,
a coffee, a latte.
107
00:04:16,006 --> 00:04:17,507
That's $11.50.
108
00:04:17,966 --> 00:04:19,509
There you go.
Keep the change.
109
00:04:19,593 --> 00:04:21,136
Oh, thanks for the tip.
Appreciate it.
110
00:04:22,345 --> 00:04:25,098
Mocha Joe: A latte
and a coffee, please.
Thank you.
111
00:04:25,182 --> 00:04:26,349
Mm.
112
00:04:27,100 --> 00:04:28,518
It's a little soft.
113
00:04:28,852 --> 00:04:30,437
What, the scone?
114
00:04:30,520 --> 00:04:33,607
Yeah. Scones are
supposed to be hard.
This is like a muffin.
115
00:04:33,690 --> 00:04:37,319
Well, not really.
It's supposed to be fresh.
116
00:04:37,402 --> 00:04:38,862
Yeah, fresh hard.
117
00:04:38,945 --> 00:04:40,739
Well, that's a fresh scone.
118
00:04:40,822 --> 00:04:43,366
I'm not quite sure
you know what a scone is,
Mocha Joe.
119
00:04:43,450 --> 00:04:45,243
‐Oh, I know what a scone is.
‐Larry: Do you?
120
00:04:45,327 --> 00:04:48,205
‐Yeah.
‐You may have a looser
definition of scone than I do.
121
00:04:48,288 --> 00:04:51,208
I don't think it's really
open to interpretation,
though.
122
00:04:51,291 --> 00:04:53,960
You want the scone, or not?
123
00:04:54,044 --> 00:04:55,837
Yeah, I'll keep
the scone‐slash‐muffin.
124
00:04:55,921 --> 00:04:58,965
‐So you're gonna
keep the scone?
‐Yeah. Muffin. Yeah.
125
00:04:59,049 --> 00:05:00,425
Enjoy the scone, Larry.
126
00:05:00,509 --> 00:05:03,303
‐Hey, you got any Danishes?
‐Uh, no.
127
00:05:03,887 --> 00:05:05,722
You're fuckin' up.
128
00:05:05,806 --> 00:05:07,808
Mocha Joe:
(sighs) Next.
129
00:05:08,475 --> 00:05:09,935
(sighs)
130
00:05:10,018 --> 00:05:12,229
‐Oh, my God.
‐(table squeaking)
131
00:05:12,312 --> 00:05:15,023
‐Look at this table.
Do you believe it?
‐Wow.
132
00:05:15,106 --> 00:05:18,026
‐Wow.
‐Hey, uh, hey, Mocha Joe.
133
00:05:18,109 --> 00:05:19,444
Mocha Joe:
Yeah?
134
00:05:19,528 --> 00:05:22,113
‐Check out this table.
‐Yeah?
135
00:05:22,197 --> 00:05:24,449
(chuckles) It's a wobb‐‐
You got a wobbly table, here.
136
00:05:24,533 --> 00:05:25,867
Yeah, well,
stop moving it.
137
00:05:25,951 --> 00:05:28,995
Stop moving it? It's‐‐
Every time I, I, I lean on it,
138
00:05:29,079 --> 00:05:30,789
‐it's gonna move.
‐Put your foot on it,
like everybody else does.
139
00:05:30,872 --> 00:05:32,666
I'm gonna sit with
my foot on the table?
140
00:05:32,749 --> 00:05:34,668
Yeah, that's how
you hold it down.
The floors are wobbly.
141
00:05:34,751 --> 00:05:37,379
‐Mocha Joe, can I give
you a little advice?
‐Yeah.
142
00:05:38,088 --> 00:05:39,589
Nobody likes a wobbly table.
143
00:05:39,673 --> 00:05:42,425
Fastest way to lose customers
is wobbly tables.
144
00:05:42,509 --> 00:05:44,302
I got an uncle
with a wobbly leg.
145
00:05:44,386 --> 00:05:46,263
I can't stand that motherfucker.
146
00:05:46,346 --> 00:05:48,265
Leaning on shit all the time.
147
00:05:49,057 --> 00:05:51,142
‐Hmm.
‐Barista:
Two medium cappuccinos.
148
00:05:51,226 --> 00:05:53,645
(gulps) Aah.
(scoffs)
149
00:05:54,020 --> 00:05:56,273
Larry:
Taste your coffee.
150
00:05:56,731 --> 00:05:58,024
‐Cold.
‐It's cold.
151
00:05:58,108 --> 00:05:59,067
Hey, man.
152
00:05:59,150 --> 00:06:00,485
‐Yeah.
‐Larry: Hey, Mocha Joe.
153
00:06:00,569 --> 00:06:02,571
‐What?
‐(laughs softly)
154
00:06:03,363 --> 00:06:04,823
This is cold coffee.
155
00:06:04,906 --> 00:06:06,533
Whoa, whoa.
Wait a second.
156
00:06:06,616 --> 00:06:08,660
That coffee is not cold.
157
00:06:08,743 --> 00:06:10,328
‐Is your coffee cold?
‐Your coffee's hot, right?
158
00:06:10,412 --> 00:06:12,163
Look, we don't wanna be
fuckin' haters right now,
159
00:06:12,247 --> 00:06:13,415
but this shit is cold.
160
00:06:13,498 --> 00:06:15,125
Can, can I get a n‐‐
161
00:06:15,208 --> 00:06:16,960
‐Can I get a new cup?
‐No.
162
00:06:17,043 --> 00:06:18,253
‐So you're not gonna
give me a new cup.
‐No.
163
00:06:18,336 --> 00:06:19,963
'Cause that's a hot cup
of coffee.
164
00:06:20,046 --> 00:06:21,840
‐It was hot when
I gave it to you‐‐
‐That's a hot cup of coffee?
165
00:06:21,923 --> 00:06:23,675
It's a hot cup of coffee.
It was hot when
I gave it to you.
166
00:06:23,758 --> 00:06:25,510
Would you stick your nose
in a hot cup of coffee?
167
00:06:25,594 --> 00:06:26,678
Why would you
stick your nose‐‐
168
00:06:26,761 --> 00:06:28,013
Because I want to prove to you
169
00:06:28,096 --> 00:06:30,432
that it's cold coffee.
Watch this.
170
00:06:31,433 --> 00:06:32,851
That's cold coffee.
171
00:06:32,934 --> 00:06:34,352
‐That doesn't
prove anything except...
‐It does.
172
00:06:34,436 --> 00:06:37,272
...that you're an old,
bald nut!
173
00:06:37,606 --> 00:06:39,149
‐What'd you say to me?
‐You heard me.
174
00:06:39,232 --> 00:06:41,443
‐Now get out,
you old, bald fuck!
‐With pleasure!
175
00:06:41,526 --> 00:06:43,778
You think I want to sit here
with a wobbly table,
176
00:06:43,862 --> 00:06:45,488
‐and drink cold
black coffee?
‐Yeah.
177
00:06:45,572 --> 00:06:47,407
‐No, thank you.
‐Yeah, good. Get out.
178
00:06:47,490 --> 00:06:50,493
Hey. Larry might be
one or two of those things,
but not all three.
179
00:06:50,577 --> 00:06:52,078
Happy New Year, Larry.
180
00:06:52,162 --> 00:06:54,581
Happy New Year, Mocha Joe!
181
00:06:54,664 --> 00:06:57,167
♪ ♪
182
00:07:04,174 --> 00:07:06,509
(collar jingling)
183
00:07:14,100 --> 00:07:16,895
Alice:
Morning, Larry.
How are you?
184
00:07:16,978 --> 00:07:19,939
‐Your dog?
‐Bogey!
185
00:07:20,023 --> 00:07:21,399
He's eating out of my bowl.
186
00:07:21,483 --> 00:07:23,652
Oh, I just got that bowl
from the kitchen.
187
00:07:23,735 --> 00:07:25,362
I thought
it was an office bowl.
188
00:07:25,445 --> 00:07:26,988
It's an office bowl for humans.
189
00:07:27,072 --> 00:07:28,239
Not for dogs.
190
00:07:28,323 --> 00:07:30,450
I mean, I wash it
at the end of the day
191
00:07:30,533 --> 00:07:32,577
‐with soap,
and then I dry it, and‐‐
‐No, that's not enough.
192
00:07:32,661 --> 00:07:35,080
It needs to be sterilized.
I can't, I can't...
193
00:07:35,163 --> 00:07:37,290
share a bowl with a dog.
194
00:07:37,374 --> 00:07:38,750
(chuckles uncomfortably)
195
00:07:38,833 --> 00:07:41,711
‐Uh, I've got
some mail for you.
‐Ah!
196
00:07:42,212 --> 00:07:46,049
‐And there's some other stuff.
‐Wait a second. Wait a second.
197
00:07:46,675 --> 00:07:47,926
‐Look at this.
‐Yeah.
198
00:07:48,009 --> 00:07:49,594
‐Is that new?
‐Relatively.
199
00:07:49,678 --> 00:07:52,681
All right, what‐‐
What the hell is that?
Why is one eye closed?
200
00:07:52,764 --> 00:07:54,015
Huh? What is all that?
201
00:07:54,099 --> 00:07:56,101
Oh, well,
it's kind of personal.
I don't‐‐
202
00:07:56,184 --> 00:07:57,602
I don't share it
with everybody.
203
00:07:57,686 --> 00:07:59,187
Yeah, it's very personal.
204
00:07:59,270 --> 00:08:01,147
The whole world can see it,
but it's personal.
205
00:08:01,231 --> 00:08:02,899
‐Well, it's on my body.
‐Okay, okay.
206
00:08:02,983 --> 00:08:04,526
Hey, let me ask
you something, okay?
207
00:08:04,609 --> 00:08:06,444
If I walked in here
with a horn on my head,
208
00:08:06,528 --> 00:08:08,154
would you say,
"What are you doing
with a horn on your head?"
209
00:08:08,238 --> 00:08:10,323
I'd say,
"Oh, I can't tell you.
It's personal."
210
00:08:10,407 --> 00:08:13,076
I got the tattoo because
of an event in my life,
211
00:08:13,159 --> 00:08:14,953
and it means something
special to me.
212
00:08:15,036 --> 00:08:16,287
It's a reminder of that to me.
213
00:08:16,371 --> 00:08:18,373
‐It's just for me.
‐Really?
214
00:08:18,456 --> 00:08:21,334
Then why didn't you
put it on your ass?
215
00:08:22,711 --> 00:08:25,797
I have something from
the business manager
that you need to sign.
216
00:08:25,880 --> 00:08:27,757
Ah. All right.
217
00:08:28,717 --> 00:08:30,885
‐Okay.
‐Uh, it's just...
218
00:08:30,969 --> 00:08:33,179
There's an initial,
and a date,
219
00:08:33,263 --> 00:08:35,765
and I think three signatures.
220
00:08:36,683 --> 00:08:37,976
May I?
221
00:08:38,059 --> 00:08:40,311
Oh, what are you doing?
That's my shirt.
222
00:08:40,395 --> 00:08:42,272
Well, I was...
cleaning my glasses.
223
00:08:42,355 --> 00:08:45,066
You can't clean your glasses
with a shirt that I'm wearing
224
00:08:45,150 --> 00:08:46,276
while I'm wearing it.
225
00:08:46,359 --> 00:08:48,820
It's inappropriate.
It's crossing a boundary.
226
00:08:48,903 --> 00:08:51,489
‐No good?
‐No good.
227
00:08:51,573 --> 00:08:53,324
Hmm. (pops lips)
Okay.
228
00:08:53,408 --> 00:08:54,909
♪
229
00:08:57,412 --> 00:09:00,415
(party chatter)
230
00:09:01,666 --> 00:09:04,252
I know. Susie loves this house
even more than her last one.
231
00:09:04,335 --> 00:09:06,171
Well, the last one stunk.
232
00:09:06,254 --> 00:09:08,173
Cheryl:
It was too big.
233
00:09:08,256 --> 00:09:12,177
And he called me, uh...
He called me old and bald.
234
00:09:12,260 --> 00:09:13,762
‐What?
‐I swear to God.
235
00:09:13,845 --> 00:09:15,221
You know,
I'll tell you something.
I love coffee,
236
00:09:15,305 --> 00:09:17,348
and I love his coffee,
but you're one of my old‐‐
237
00:09:17,432 --> 00:09:18,933
You are my oldest friend.
238
00:09:19,017 --> 00:09:20,769
I'm gonna boycott that place.
239
00:09:20,852 --> 00:09:22,896
‐You're gonna boycott
Mocha Joe's?
‐I'm boycotting.
240
00:09:22,979 --> 00:09:24,647
‐Hey!
‐Jeff: How about that?
241
00:09:24,731 --> 00:09:27,233
‐I'm boycotting Mocha Joe.
You can't do that to my friend.
‐Larry: Hey.
242
00:09:27,317 --> 00:09:29,069
‐Look at this guy.
Look at this guy.
‐That's a friend.
243
00:09:29,152 --> 00:09:30,487
We were in the same
hospital together.
244
00:09:30,570 --> 00:09:32,489
‐He can't fuck with my friend.
‐All right!
245
00:09:32,572 --> 00:09:34,574
‐I'm gonna get some coffee.
‐Larry: Okay.
246
00:09:34,657 --> 00:09:36,367
Enjoy your coffee.
247
00:09:36,451 --> 00:09:38,703
‐He's boycotting.
‐He's boycotting.
That's a big move.
248
00:09:38,787 --> 00:09:41,039
‐Jeff: That's a big move,
a boycott.
‐Oh, my God.
249
00:09:41,122 --> 00:09:43,708
Who invited you?
You pig.
250
00:09:43,792 --> 00:09:46,294
No, uh, Nancy, that is not
Harvey Weinstein.
251
00:09:46,377 --> 00:09:49,422
‐I'm so sorry, Jeff.
My sister's from out of town.
‐Jeff: Oh!
252
00:09:49,506 --> 00:09:51,382
‐I'm just, I'm really sorry.
‐Oh, my God. Oh, I'm so‐‐
253
00:09:51,466 --> 00:09:53,968
‐Jeff:
I'm the host of the party.
‐Oh, my God! I'm so sorry.
254
00:09:54,052 --> 00:09:55,553
Yes, I'm not Harvey Weinstein.
255
00:09:55,637 --> 00:09:57,555
‐I'm sorry. Thank you.
I'm sorry.
‐Jeff: Okay.
256
00:09:57,639 --> 00:09:59,724
(whispers):
He looks like Harvey Weinstein.
He looks just like him.
257
00:09:59,808 --> 00:10:02,227
‐What the hell?
‐Okay.
258
00:10:02,310 --> 00:10:06,523
All the time,
women, men‐‐
doesn't matter.
259
00:10:06,606 --> 00:10:08,691
‐Larry: Geez.
‐And suddenly, I'm this guy.
260
00:10:08,775 --> 00:10:11,027
‐Unbelievable.
‐Unbelievable.
261
00:10:11,111 --> 00:10:14,572
I'm starving.
Oh! Pigs in a blanket.
262
00:10:14,656 --> 00:10:16,241
‐What's better?
‐Oh...
263
00:10:16,324 --> 00:10:19,494
I've been following
her around all night,
but she never has any.
264
00:10:19,577 --> 00:10:20,912
Jeff:
They go fast.
265
00:10:20,995 --> 00:10:23,414
I don't care how foo‐foo
the other items are,
266
00:10:23,498 --> 00:10:25,750
‐and people love 'em,
pigs in a blanket.
‐Yeah.
267
00:10:25,834 --> 00:10:29,337
Larry, I am
extremely displeased
with your behavior.
268
00:10:29,420 --> 00:10:31,089
Ladies and gentlemen,
269
00:10:31,172 --> 00:10:34,425
the 16th president
of these United States...
270
00:10:34,509 --> 00:10:36,427
‐Yeah, yeah. You're funny.
‐...Abraham Lincoln.
271
00:10:36,511 --> 00:10:38,096
Let's give him
a big round of applause.
272
00:10:38,179 --> 00:10:40,515
‐Like you know anything
about fashion.
‐It is such an honor
273
00:10:40,598 --> 00:10:43,059
to be standing near you,
Mr. President.
274
00:10:43,143 --> 00:10:46,437
This hat is very similar
to the one that
Kate Middleton wore.
275
00:10:46,521 --> 00:10:48,690
‐Okay? You don't know shit.
‐Oh, really?
276
00:10:48,773 --> 00:10:50,859
‐I know you look ridiculous.
How about that?
‐Yeah. Yeah, fine.
277
00:10:50,942 --> 00:10:54,737
You act ridiculous.
Why are you harassing
my friend Randi at the gym?
278
00:10:54,821 --> 00:10:57,574
Hey, you know what?
Somebody has to stand up
for that fetus.
279
00:10:57,657 --> 00:10:58,992
You don't know anything
about fetuses.
280
00:10:59,075 --> 00:11:00,743
I know you don't go
on a treadmill
281
00:11:00,827 --> 00:11:02,453
eight months pregnant.
You don't have to be a genius
282
00:11:02,537 --> 00:11:04,205
‐to figure that out.
‐Why not? Why not?
283
00:11:04,289 --> 00:11:05,999
Do you think
that's good for fetus?
All that jostling?
284
00:11:06,082 --> 00:11:09,460
It's not your job
to mansplain to Randi!
285
00:11:09,544 --> 00:11:11,254
‐Jeff, there's people
I want you to meet.
‐Okay.
286
00:11:11,337 --> 00:11:13,965
"Four score and seven years ago,
287
00:11:14,048 --> 00:11:17,343
"our fathers brought forth
to this continent
288
00:11:17,427 --> 00:11:18,845
"a new nation,
289
00:11:18,928 --> 00:11:20,722
"conceived in liberty,
290
00:11:20,805 --> 00:11:22,724
‐dedicated..."
‐Larry, Happy New Year.
291
00:11:22,807 --> 00:11:24,225
You're too late.
292
00:11:24,309 --> 00:11:26,060
"Happy New Year."
Come on. It's three weeks.
293
00:11:26,144 --> 00:11:28,438
‐Isn't it almost
a month already?
‐It's ridiculous.
294
00:11:28,521 --> 00:11:30,690
Ah, look, well, they have
nothing to say, these people.
295
00:11:31,316 --> 00:11:34,235
‐Oh, man.
‐How do you know it's
a happy new year, anyway?
296
00:11:34,527 --> 00:11:36,905
‐I can't believe it.
‐What?
297
00:11:37,697 --> 00:11:40,325
Aw, I missed 'em again.
It's unbelievable.
298
00:11:40,408 --> 00:11:42,368
Hey, Larry!
Hey!
299
00:11:42,452 --> 00:11:43,578
‐Hey.
‐How you been?
300
00:11:43,661 --> 00:11:45,163
‐Good.
‐Yeah, great to see you.
301
00:11:45,246 --> 00:11:46,623
Shit. That's Rosen‐‐
302
00:11:46,706 --> 00:11:47,874
‐Phil Rosenthal.
‐Phil Rosenthal.
303
00:11:47,957 --> 00:11:49,834
He just talks about
his shows all the time.
304
00:11:49,918 --> 00:11:53,379
His own show, and how about‐‐
Romano is on 500 times a day.
305
00:11:53,463 --> 00:11:54,839
Somebody Feed Phil.
306
00:11:54,923 --> 00:11:57,175
Oh, geez, with all the chaos
in the world,
307
00:11:57,258 --> 00:11:58,885
in third‐world countries,
feed him?
308
00:11:58,968 --> 00:12:00,178
He should be feeding
other people.
309
00:12:00,261 --> 00:12:02,013
It should be called
Phil Feeds Everybody.
310
00:12:02,096 --> 00:12:04,515
‐You know what I'm gonna
do with him tonight?
‐What's that?
311
00:12:04,599 --> 00:12:06,476
The Big Goodbye.
312
00:12:06,559 --> 00:12:08,186
I'm employing
The Big Goodbye.
313
00:12:08,269 --> 00:12:10,521
‐It's the greatest
move in history.
‐How great is The Big Goodbye?
314
00:12:10,605 --> 00:12:12,440
I've been doing it for years,
since you taught me.
315
00:12:12,523 --> 00:12:14,025
‐You avoid the person
all night...
‐Of course.
316
00:12:14,108 --> 00:12:16,069
And then at the end,
when you're about to leave,
317
00:12:16,152 --> 00:12:18,029
you go, "Ah!"
You give 'em
a big goodbye.
318
00:12:18,112 --> 00:12:21,658
‐Then they feel good...
‐Bye! Goodbye and good luck
to you and your family.
319
00:12:21,741 --> 00:12:24,202
They're very happy that
you spent this time with them
320
00:12:24,285 --> 00:12:25,703
at the end of the night, and...
321
00:12:25,787 --> 00:12:27,705
‐and you slip out.
‐It's genius.
322
00:12:27,789 --> 00:12:30,750
Um, are you up for doing
our old ventriloquist act?
323
00:12:30,833 --> 00:12:32,877
‐I don't know.
Susie wants to see it.
‐Yeah, I'll do it.
324
00:12:32,961 --> 00:12:34,003
‐You will?
‐Yeah.
325
00:12:34,087 --> 00:12:35,338
Okay, good.
Can we do it pretty soon?
326
00:12:35,421 --> 00:12:36,798
Because I want Ted to see it
before he leaves.
327
00:12:36,881 --> 00:12:38,675
‐Of course.
‐Thank you.
328
00:12:39,467 --> 00:12:40,969
Ted.
329
00:12:41,052 --> 00:12:42,804
‐(all laughing)
‐I'd like to thank
Jeff and Susie
330
00:12:42,887 --> 00:12:45,890
‐for inviting us into
their beautiful home.
‐I like the other one.
331
00:12:45,974 --> 00:12:47,767
(crowd laughing)
332
00:12:47,850 --> 00:12:49,852
Well, I think the house
is very nice.
333
00:12:49,936 --> 00:12:52,438
‐(laughs)
‐(crowd laughing)
334
00:12:52,522 --> 00:12:55,692
Did they throw that
fish smell in for free?
335
00:12:55,775 --> 00:12:58,861
(laughing)
336
00:12:58,945 --> 00:13:02,615
And, and, and look at all
our other friends who are
kind enough to join us.
337
00:13:02,699 --> 00:13:06,619
‐There's, there's Ted Danson.
‐Wow, is he handsome!
338
00:13:06,703 --> 00:13:08,246
He sure thinks so.
339
00:13:08,329 --> 00:13:10,957
‐Oh!
‐(laughing)
340
00:13:11,666 --> 00:13:13,918
And how about Susie,
our inimitable hostess?
341
00:13:14,002 --> 00:13:16,754
‐(clapping)
‐Susie, I love the curtains,
342
00:13:16,838 --> 00:13:18,840
but why did you make
a jacket out of it?
343
00:13:18,923 --> 00:13:21,926
‐Crowd: Oh!
‐(raucous laughter)
344
00:13:22,010 --> 00:13:24,762
‐Are you having a good time?
‐A good time?
Are you kidding me?
345
00:13:24,846 --> 00:13:28,433
I'm with a bunch of stiffs,
the food sucks, the drinks
aren't strong enough,
346
00:13:28,516 --> 00:13:29,600
and your hand is up my ass.
347
00:13:29,684 --> 00:13:31,853
(laughing)
348
00:13:32,311 --> 00:13:35,440
(laughing):
Hey. Don't look so down.
349
00:13:35,523 --> 00:13:37,567
(laughing)
350
00:13:38,234 --> 00:13:39,902
Are you mad?
351
00:13:39,986 --> 00:13:42,488
‐Let's kiss and make up.
‐I'm...
352
00:13:42,572 --> 00:13:46,743
‐I'm not gonna kiss a dummy.
‐I wouldn't. She's got a cold.
353
00:13:47,702 --> 00:13:50,079
Aw. That's the end!
354
00:13:50,163 --> 00:13:51,956
‐(applause, laughter)
‐Jeff: Bravo!
355
00:13:52,040 --> 00:13:54,417
Bravo! Cheryl and Larry.
356
00:13:54,500 --> 00:13:57,420
‐Cheryl and Larry.
‐(cheers, whistles)
357
00:13:57,503 --> 00:13:59,714
What a great audience.
Thank you. Thank you.
358
00:13:59,797 --> 00:14:03,176
‐Fantastic.
Thank you all for coming.
‐Susie: I love that bit.
359
00:14:03,259 --> 00:14:05,511
‐Thanks for coming.
‐Susie: Always loved that bit.
360
00:14:05,595 --> 00:14:08,306
‐You were very funny.
‐Thank you.
361
00:14:08,389 --> 00:14:10,892
‐I'm sorry, but I gotta
catch my plane.
‐Okay.
362
00:14:10,975 --> 00:14:13,478
Actually, you know what,
I better not.
I don't wanna catch a cold.
363
00:14:13,561 --> 00:14:15,313
‐Cheryl: Oh, I know.
You gotta stay...
‐I'm sorry. Yeah.
364
00:14:15,396 --> 00:14:17,398
‐I'll call you when I land.
‐...healthy. Okay.
365
00:14:17,482 --> 00:14:18,900
You don't need to call her
when you land.
366
00:14:18,983 --> 00:14:21,069
If there's a plane crash,
we'll know about it.
367
00:14:21,152 --> 00:14:23,196
‐Okay. I'll walk you, Ted.
‐Thank you, guys.
368
00:14:23,279 --> 00:14:25,531
‐Susie: Thank you for coming.
‐Ted: That was a great evening.
369
00:14:25,615 --> 00:14:27,742
♪
370
00:14:35,291 --> 00:14:37,502
Ah! There you are.
Finally gotcha.
371
00:14:37,585 --> 00:14:39,420
Sir, I need you
to get out of here.
372
00:14:39,504 --> 00:14:41,172
Get out of here?
What are you talking about?
373
00:14:41,255 --> 00:14:44,008
I need you to leave this room
'cause you've been ogling me...
374
00:14:44,092 --> 00:14:46,135
‐the entire night.
‐Ogling you? Are you nuts?
375
00:14:46,219 --> 00:14:48,805
‐I, I, I've been ogling
the pigs in a blanket.
‐Am I‐‐
376
00:14:48,888 --> 00:14:50,348
Oh, my God. Yeah.
377
00:14:50,431 --> 00:14:53,267
‐Not the first time
this has happened.
‐What? I want one.
378
00:15:04,153 --> 00:15:05,279
Wow.
379
00:15:06,447 --> 00:15:08,866
‐Ah. Hey.
‐Hey. Excuse me.
380
00:15:08,950 --> 00:15:10,868
‐Huh? Were we a hit?
‐We were a hit.
381
00:15:10,952 --> 00:15:13,830
‐We were the highlight
of this party.
‐Highlight of the party.
382
00:15:13,913 --> 00:15:16,791
Yeah, I mean,
it's a been a while,
but we've still got it.
383
00:15:16,874 --> 00:15:19,210
‐What are‐‐
What are you doing?
‐I'm gonna go home.
384
00:15:19,293 --> 00:15:21,212
‐I'm just getting an Uber.
‐Uber?
385
00:15:21,295 --> 00:15:23,756
‐I'll take you home.
‐You don't have to do that.
386
00:15:23,840 --> 00:15:25,216
Ah, it's nothing.
387
00:15:25,299 --> 00:15:28,136
‐Okay. Okay.
Thank you. That's‐‐
‐Um, just give me...
388
00:15:28,219 --> 00:15:29,595
Give me two minutes.
389
00:15:29,679 --> 00:15:31,931
Okay. All right. Thanks.
390
00:15:32,682 --> 00:15:34,267
Are you kidding?
391
00:15:34,350 --> 00:15:37,311
I can't believe
I didn't get a chance
to talk to you all night,
392
00:15:37,395 --> 00:15:38,938
and now I'm on my way out.
393
00:15:39,021 --> 00:15:41,649
‐What a shame.
‐You giving me
The Big Goodbye?
394
00:15:41,732 --> 00:15:43,943
‐The Big Goodbye? What are you‐‐
What are you talking about?
‐Big Goodbye.
395
00:15:44,026 --> 00:15:46,487
Where you avoid me all night,
and then you think you can
396
00:15:46,571 --> 00:15:48,823
cure it by having a Big Goodbye.
I know. I've been around.
397
00:15:48,906 --> 00:15:51,701
‐I wasn't giving you a Big‐‐ I
never heard of the Big Goodbye.
‐It seems like a Big Goodbye.
398
00:15:51,784 --> 00:15:53,786
No, it wasn't.
It was just a normal goodbye.
399
00:15:53,870 --> 00:15:55,454
‐That's a normal goodbye.
‐Yeah?
400
00:15:55,538 --> 00:15:56,706
‐Yeah.
‐Really?
401
00:15:56,789 --> 00:15:57,915
Yeah. I wasn't trying
to avoid you.
402
00:15:57,999 --> 00:15:59,500
Are you kidding?
Why would I avoid you?
403
00:15:59,584 --> 00:16:01,127
Have lunch with me
Wednesday?
404
00:16:01,544 --> 00:16:03,254
We have a lot to talk about.
Listen,
405
00:16:03,337 --> 00:16:05,298
we're doing Raymond
in Portugal.
406
00:16:05,381 --> 00:16:07,800
Yeah.
Everybody Loves Joam.
407
00:16:07,884 --> 00:16:09,927
It's fantastic.
I get to go.
408
00:16:10,011 --> 00:16:11,804
And then I have the whole
Somebody Feed Phil show.
409
00:16:11,888 --> 00:16:14,640
I want you to do my show.
I want to go to Ethiopia
with you.
410
00:16:14,724 --> 00:16:16,767
‐(chuckles) Ethiopia.
‐Ethiopia's great.
411
00:16:16,851 --> 00:16:18,436
I don't think I'm
running off to Ethiopia‐‐
412
00:16:18,519 --> 00:16:19,937
Sure, you eat with your hands.
It's fantastic.
413
00:16:20,021 --> 00:16:21,439
‐Everybody shares,
and, and the thing‐‐
‐I... I...
414
00:16:21,522 --> 00:16:23,232
‐I don't like to leave
the continent, you know.
‐No?
415
00:16:23,316 --> 00:16:24,609
‐Nah.
‐All right.
You know what?
416
00:16:24,692 --> 00:16:26,444
We'll start lunch Wednesday.
We'll see where it goes.
417
00:16:26,527 --> 00:16:28,905
Say yes to me
and you can go.
418
00:16:29,488 --> 00:16:31,365
‐Okay.
‐Okay.
419
00:16:31,449 --> 00:16:32,867
Larry: You know,
did I ever tell you
420
00:16:32,950 --> 00:16:35,369
that I once did a, uh,
premature Big Goodbye?
421
00:16:35,453 --> 00:16:37,622
So what does that mean?
You said goodbye and then
you didn't leave?
422
00:16:37,705 --> 00:16:39,874
‐I did a Big Goodbye
and then I didn't‐‐
‐Come on.
423
00:16:39,957 --> 00:16:42,793
‐And I didn't leave.
‐And what did they do?
They were mad?
424
00:16:42,877 --> 00:16:45,630
‐I ran into her in the kitchen
about an hour later.
‐Come on.
425
00:16:45,713 --> 00:16:48,424
And what do you say?
What do you even say?
426
00:16:48,508 --> 00:16:50,635
She said,
"I thought you left."
I said, "Well, you know.
427
00:16:50,718 --> 00:16:53,596
I got, uh...
something happened."
I don't know.
428
00:16:53,679 --> 00:16:55,264
I made up a story.
429
00:16:55,348 --> 00:16:57,934
I, but I,
I can't believe that...
430
00:16:58,017 --> 00:16:59,477
that he knew about
the Big Goodbye.
431
00:16:59,560 --> 00:17:01,229
‐(laughing)
‐That was unbelievable to me.
432
00:17:01,312 --> 00:17:04,106
Well, I can't believe
that you kissed me when
you knew I had a cold.
433
00:17:04,190 --> 00:17:05,816
That was pretty unbelievable.
434
00:17:05,900 --> 00:17:08,069
Yeah. You...
435
00:17:09,278 --> 00:17:11,239
I would do it again.
436
00:17:20,790 --> 00:17:22,291
(sighs)
437
00:17:31,217 --> 00:17:33,052
Cheryl:
Wow, Larry.
438
00:17:33,469 --> 00:17:35,096
What are we doing?
439
00:17:35,680 --> 00:17:38,015
By the way,
before we get into that,
440
00:17:38,099 --> 00:17:40,184
are you aware that you have
a wobbly table here?
441
00:17:40,268 --> 00:17:43,521
Look at this.
Look at this table.
It's unbelievable.
442
00:17:43,604 --> 00:17:46,774
‐I, I don't know how you
can go to bed at night.
‐Yeah, it doesn't bother me.
443
00:17:46,857 --> 00:17:48,734
If all tables in
your house wobbled,
444
00:17:48,818 --> 00:17:50,945
you could live like that?
You could in a wobble‐house?
445
00:17:51,028 --> 00:17:55,116
We need to talk about Ted.
We need to talk about everything
that just happened here.
446
00:17:55,199 --> 00:17:57,034
‐What?
‐What?
447
00:17:57,118 --> 00:17:59,161
‐What are you so...
‐Oh...
448
00:17:59,245 --> 00:18:00,746
I'm, I'm your ex‐husband.
449
00:18:00,830 --> 00:18:02,999
Ted is such a good person.
450
00:18:03,082 --> 00:18:05,459
No, he's not such
a good person, okay?
451
00:18:05,543 --> 00:18:08,170
You don't do that.
You don't date
a friend's ex‐wife.
452
00:18:08,254 --> 00:18:10,047
I mean, it's crazy.
453
00:18:10,631 --> 00:18:13,092
‐You know what it is?
‐Now... what?
454
00:18:13,175 --> 00:18:16,887
I think when I'm with you,
it makes me feel...
455
00:18:17,471 --> 00:18:19,890
‐...better about myself?
‐Morally superior.
456
00:18:19,974 --> 00:18:21,309
‐Yes.
‐Yes.
457
00:18:21,392 --> 00:18:23,060
‐I hear that a lot. Yeah.
‐Yeah. So, I'm not perfect,
458
00:18:23,144 --> 00:18:25,730
‐but at least
I'm better than you.
‐You're better than me.
459
00:18:25,813 --> 00:18:27,148
I can relate to
what you're saying,
460
00:18:27,231 --> 00:18:29,317
'cause I don't, I don't
feel that way with people.
461
00:18:29,400 --> 00:18:32,653
‐I feel morally
inferior to people.
‐Yeah.
462
00:18:32,737 --> 00:18:35,906
But I feel that way
with animals 'cause
they're generally so stupid,
463
00:18:35,990 --> 00:18:38,826
and I can‐‐
especially insects,
I can crush them.
464
00:18:38,909 --> 00:18:41,078
You know, and, and
they eat each other.
465
00:18:41,162 --> 00:18:43,623
I mean, they're crazy,
animals. So, yeah.
466
00:18:43,706 --> 00:18:46,083
I feel smarter
and morally superior to them.
467
00:18:46,167 --> 00:18:47,752
(both laugh)
468
00:18:47,835 --> 00:18:51,339
‐Hey. Uh... Let me
ask you something.
‐Yeah?
469
00:18:52,214 --> 00:18:54,508
Is there any chance that...
470
00:18:55,384 --> 00:18:58,054
we might meet up again?
471
00:18:58,721 --> 00:19:00,556
We'll see.
472
00:19:00,640 --> 00:19:01,891
We'll see.
473
00:19:02,141 --> 00:19:05,186
‐You can't stay here.
‐I'm gonna tell you something,
okay?
474
00:19:05,269 --> 00:19:07,271
‐If we ever got
back together...
‐Yeah.
475
00:19:07,355 --> 00:19:10,775
...and somehow this table
appeared on, on our bedside...
476
00:19:10,858 --> 00:19:13,778
‐Yeah?
‐...it would be fixed
immediately.
477
00:19:13,861 --> 00:19:15,738
‐Immediately.
‐Oh, my God.
478
00:19:15,821 --> 00:19:18,658
‐Larry: I could not live
with a wobbly table.
‐Cheryl: Larry, please.
479
00:19:18,741 --> 00:19:20,201
‐Go.
‐Larry: Okay.
480
00:19:24,455 --> 00:19:25,998
Ha‐ha!
481
00:19:26,082 --> 00:19:27,625
‐What?
‐Where the fuck you been at?
482
00:19:27,708 --> 00:19:29,460
‐What are you? My mother?
‐Fuck yeah, I am.
483
00:19:29,543 --> 00:19:31,629
All right,
I was at a party, okay?
I was at Jeff's party.
484
00:19:31,712 --> 00:19:33,464
‐That party was over
a long time ago.
‐Huh?
485
00:19:33,547 --> 00:19:36,634
Yeah. This right here‐‐
This right here?
It's called tappin' hours.
486
00:19:36,717 --> 00:19:38,678
This is the hours when
people are tappin' ass.
487
00:19:38,761 --> 00:19:40,554
I'm not tappin'.
I'm not tappin'.
488
00:19:40,638 --> 00:19:42,431
Older white men should not
be out this fuckin' late.
489
00:19:42,515 --> 00:19:45,559
There's no late‐night
yacht club,
or late‐night garage sales
490
00:19:45,643 --> 00:19:47,395
and shit like that.
You out here fuckin'.
491
00:19:47,478 --> 00:19:48,979
When I'm tappin',
I always tell you.
492
00:19:49,063 --> 00:19:50,690
I come home and spread
the fuckin' news.
493
00:19:50,773 --> 00:19:52,358
You wanna know who I'm tappin'?
You wanna know who I'm tappin'?
494
00:19:52,441 --> 00:19:54,527
‐Who the fuck you tappin'?
‐(slams)
495
00:19:54,610 --> 00:19:57,238
Larry: I can't get out of it.
It's Phil Rosenthal.
He's just‐‐
496
00:19:57,321 --> 00:19:58,989
What do you do?
How many times
can you say no?
497
00:19:59,073 --> 00:20:00,991
You couldn't do
the Big Goodbye?
498
00:20:01,075 --> 00:20:03,202
I did the Big Goodbye.
He saw right through it.
499
00:20:03,285 --> 00:20:04,745
Ah! You know what I'll do?
500
00:20:04,829 --> 00:20:06,330
I'll call you
in the middle of lunch.
501
00:20:06,414 --> 00:20:08,416
Say it's an emergency
and you gotta go.
502
00:20:08,499 --> 00:20:10,334
I did that the last time
I had lunch with him.
503
00:20:10,418 --> 00:20:12,420
Oh, boy.
That guy's relentless.
504
00:20:12,503 --> 00:20:15,548
Hey, Lar, that was
some party last night, huh?
505
00:20:16,090 --> 00:20:18,050
‐Yeah, it was a great party.
‐You had a good time?
506
00:20:18,134 --> 00:20:19,719
‐I did. I had a nice time.
‐Yeah.
507
00:20:19,802 --> 00:20:22,263
So you drove Cheryl home?
508
00:20:23,139 --> 00:20:24,223
Yep.
509
00:20:24,306 --> 00:20:25,725
That was very nice of you.
510
00:20:25,808 --> 00:20:27,977
‐Considering Ted's
out of town‐‐
‐Yeah. I'm a nice guy.
511
00:20:28,060 --> 00:20:29,520
‐Yeah.
‐Yeah. I'm a nice guy.
512
00:20:29,603 --> 00:20:31,605
So, what, did you just
drop her off, or‐‐
513
00:20:31,689 --> 00:20:33,858
‐Yeah. Pretty much.
‐Hmm.
514
00:20:33,941 --> 00:20:37,695
Dropped her off.
Said good night.
Went on my merry way.
515
00:20:37,778 --> 00:20:39,321
Mm‐hmm.
516
00:20:40,865 --> 00:20:43,951
‐Is there something
you would like to know, or‐‐
‐No, no, no.
517
00:20:44,034 --> 00:20:45,953
Something you're
not saying? Um...
518
00:20:46,036 --> 00:20:47,788
You know, can I person
not just ask
519
00:20:47,872 --> 00:20:50,541
‐a, a normal question?
‐No, they're not
normal questions.
520
00:20:50,624 --> 00:20:53,335
‐There's a lot of implications.
A lot of implications.
‐Larry: You're fishing‐‐
521
00:20:53,419 --> 00:20:55,087
You're on a little
fishing expedition.
522
00:20:55,171 --> 00:20:56,714
You know,
you two are something.
523
00:20:56,797 --> 00:20:58,048
‐You two make crap up‐‐
‐We're something?
524
00:20:58,132 --> 00:20:59,550
You know what?
You're something.
525
00:20:59,633 --> 00:21:01,552
Don't eat all the leftovers.
We need them for dinner.
526
00:21:01,635 --> 00:21:03,804
‐Jeff: Sure, I won't.
‐You're something.
527
00:21:04,638 --> 00:21:07,224
‐I'll eat whatever
the fuck I want.
‐That's right.
528
00:21:07,308 --> 00:21:08,893
Hey. Did you sleep with Cheryl?
529
00:21:08,976 --> 00:21:10,519
‐Yeah.
‐You did?
530
00:21:10,603 --> 00:21:13,230
‐Yeah. Listen.
(chuckles)
‐Ah.
531
00:21:13,314 --> 00:21:15,733
You cannot say anything
to Susie. Cannot.
532
00:21:15,816 --> 00:21:17,735
Under any circumstances.
Cheryl swore me to secrecy.
533
00:21:17,818 --> 00:21:18,986
She didn't want me to tell you.
534
00:21:19,069 --> 00:21:20,905
But I had to.
I couldn't‐‐
How could I not?
535
00:21:20,988 --> 00:21:22,907
I'm a human being,
for God's sake.
536
00:21:22,990 --> 00:21:24,450
‐I think it's great.
‐Right?
537
00:21:24,533 --> 00:21:26,911
Yes. Wha‐‐
What are you hoping
to get out of it, though?
538
00:21:26,994 --> 00:21:29,538
I'm hoping to get
back together, but...
539
00:21:29,622 --> 00:21:32,458
‐I'll be surprised
if I see her again.
‐Hmm.
540
00:21:32,541 --> 00:21:34,627
We on for golf on Saturday?
541
00:21:34,710 --> 00:21:36,253
Yeah. Um...
542
00:21:36,337 --> 00:21:38,088
Arnie Norton asked
if he could play.
543
00:21:38,172 --> 00:21:41,217
(scoffs)
I'm not playing with him.
He's a Trump supporter.
544
00:21:41,300 --> 00:21:43,552
‐Never play with
a Trump supporter.
‐Really?
545
00:21:43,636 --> 00:21:45,346
See him around town
with that hat.
546
00:21:45,429 --> 00:21:47,014
"Make America Great Again."
547
00:21:47,097 --> 00:21:49,058
I don't need that crap.
548
00:21:50,184 --> 00:21:53,062
He just‐‐
He makes me want to
not be anywhere near him.
549
00:21:53,938 --> 00:21:57,441
I don't know.
You can check with Carl.
See if he wants to play.
550
00:21:57,525 --> 00:21:58,734
I gotta go.
551
00:22:00,110 --> 00:22:02,947
(Phil whistling)
552
00:22:03,489 --> 00:22:04,949
‐Phil: Oh, hello, there.
‐Hostess: Hi.
553
00:22:05,032 --> 00:22:07,368
Hi. I'm Phil Rosenthal.
I have a twelve o'clock.
554
00:22:07,451 --> 00:22:09,328
Oh, yes.
Mr. David's already here.
555
00:22:09,411 --> 00:22:11,747
‐He is? Wow.
‐Yes. Right this way.
556
00:22:11,831 --> 00:22:14,333
‐Very impressive.
‐He was early.
557
00:22:17,878 --> 00:22:19,213
Enjoy.
558
00:22:19,296 --> 00:22:21,590
Larry:
Hey, Phil!
559
00:22:22,508 --> 00:22:25,719
Good to see you.
Sit. Sit down. Sit down.
560
00:22:26,929 --> 00:22:29,765
Boy, I'm so glad we did this.
It was such a good idea.
561
00:22:29,849 --> 00:22:31,141
You, you were definitely right.
562
00:22:31,225 --> 00:22:32,977
I'm, I'm starving.
I hope this place is good.
563
00:22:33,060 --> 00:22:34,812
Yeah, yeah, it's great.
It's big portions
564
00:22:34,895 --> 00:22:36,981
on the food and everything.
It's really...
565
00:22:37,064 --> 00:22:39,066
a fantastic place. Um...
566
00:22:39,149 --> 00:22:41,360
You know what else?
I've been thinking...
567
00:22:41,443 --> 00:22:43,946
Really thinking about
this Ethiopia thing.
568
00:22:44,029 --> 00:22:46,198
Yeah, actually,
I heard that
we have some budget cuts,
569
00:22:46,282 --> 00:22:49,994
and Ethiopia's a little...
ex‐expensive to shoot in.
570
00:22:50,077 --> 00:22:51,704
Wasn't that one of
the shithole countries?
571
00:22:51,787 --> 00:22:53,914
I can't remember if
that was on the list or not.
572
00:22:53,998 --> 00:22:56,792
‐Oh, look. I'm getting a thing.
‐Larry: Oh!
573
00:22:57,167 --> 00:22:59,628
Oh, yeah.
Oh, look at that.
Um, uh...
574
00:22:59,712 --> 00:23:02,172
My son's flight, uh,
got in early.
575
00:23:02,256 --> 00:23:04,675
‐And I gotta get him.
I gotta go get him.
‐Oh! Really?
576
00:23:04,758 --> 00:23:07,970
‐Yeah, no, really.
‐Let's... Send, send
an Uber or something.
577
00:23:08,053 --> 00:23:10,598
He needs to see me
because he has a little anxiety.
578
00:23:10,681 --> 00:23:12,349
No, no! You know what?
Phil...
579
00:23:12,433 --> 00:23:15,227
No, no.
We'll, we'll, we'll...
We'll... something.
580
00:23:18,105 --> 00:23:19,648
Ah!
581
00:23:19,732 --> 00:23:21,567
Fill her up.
582
00:23:22,443 --> 00:23:24,361
‐Ah! Arigato!
‐Yes.
583
00:23:24,445 --> 00:23:27,907
‐Arigato!
‐All right. Two seats
at the sushi bar.
584
00:23:35,080 --> 00:23:37,917
You know what?
Actually, I think we'd prefer
to sit at a table, please.
585
00:23:38,000 --> 00:23:39,668
Larry:
Huh.
586
00:23:41,295 --> 00:23:42,796
Sad.
587
00:23:42,880 --> 00:23:44,924
Very sad. Sad.
588
00:23:45,007 --> 00:23:47,051
(motorcycle rumbling)
589
00:23:47,134 --> 00:23:49,178
(singing indistinctly)
590
00:23:49,261 --> 00:23:52,097
‐Biker: Hey! What
the fuck are you doing?
‐Whoa.
591
00:23:52,181 --> 00:23:54,725
‐Oh, God. Oh, God.
‐Motherfucker!
What the fuck?
592
00:23:54,808 --> 00:23:56,477
What are you
trying to do, man?
593
00:23:56,560 --> 00:23:59,688
‐What the fuck are you doing?
You little fucker!
‐Oh, God. Oh, God.
594
00:23:59,772 --> 00:24:02,066
‐I'm sorry, I didn't see you.
‐What the fuck?
595
00:24:02,149 --> 00:24:04,693
‐I'm sorry, I didn't see you!
‐I'm ought to rip you
outta that fuckin' car!
596
00:24:04,777 --> 00:24:07,738
‐You little shit.
‐I'm sorry.
I didn't see you.
597
00:24:07,821 --> 00:24:10,199
Oh. Just be more careful
next time, okay?
598
00:24:10,282 --> 00:24:13,410
Will do. Will do.
Okay. Thank you.
599
00:24:13,494 --> 00:24:15,454
♪
600
00:24:17,748 --> 00:24:19,750
Richard:
♪ Now, now... ♪
601
00:24:19,833 --> 00:24:23,253
♪ I want my coffee
and my Danish
right now, now, now ♪
602
00:24:23,337 --> 00:24:26,548
(continues singing indistinctly)
603
00:24:41,230 --> 00:24:43,107
‐(knocking)
‐What are you‐‐
What are you doing here?
604
00:24:43,190 --> 00:24:45,025
What do you mean
what am I doin' here?
605
00:24:45,109 --> 00:24:47,152
‐Come here. Come out.
I want to talk to you.
‐You come here.
606
00:24:47,236 --> 00:24:49,321
‐No, come on.
Come on out here.
‐No, you come.
607
00:24:49,405 --> 00:24:51,532
‐Come on. I want
to talk to you. Come on.
‐I'm not leaving. You come.
608
00:24:51,615 --> 00:24:54,410
‐You come. You come.
‐(mutters): Aw, fuck it.
609
00:24:55,703 --> 00:24:58,247
What are you doing here?
You said you were gonna
boycott this place.
610
00:24:58,330 --> 00:24:59,915
I am boycotting this place.
611
00:24:59,999 --> 00:25:01,959
Oh, this is a boycott?
Sitting here drinking coffee?
612
00:25:02,042 --> 00:25:03,544
That's a boy‐‐
That's quite a boycott.
613
00:25:03,627 --> 00:25:06,672
I told you,
for the rest of
my dying days,
614
00:25:06,755 --> 00:25:09,216
I will never come
to this place with you.
615
00:25:09,299 --> 00:25:11,010
‐Ever.
‐That's not what you said.
616
00:25:11,093 --> 00:25:13,303
‐I said I was‐‐
‐You said you're
boycotting this place.
617
00:25:13,387 --> 00:25:15,431
And you're
never coming back here.
You didn't say with me.
618
00:25:15,514 --> 00:25:17,725
What are you?
My Jewish puppet master?
619
00:25:17,808 --> 00:25:19,727
I can do whatever
the fuck I want alone,
620
00:25:19,810 --> 00:25:21,812
‐but with you,
I will never come in here.
‐Look!
621
00:25:21,895 --> 00:25:23,147
I swear on my life.
622
00:25:23,230 --> 00:25:24,773
Who the fuck needs you
for a boycott
623
00:25:24,857 --> 00:25:27,109
if I'm boycotting already?
I don't need you
624
00:25:27,192 --> 00:25:28,694
to boycott.
You said you're boycotting,
625
00:25:28,777 --> 00:25:29,987
‐but you didn't boycott.
‐Are you done?
626
00:25:30,070 --> 00:25:31,697
I‐‐ I don't understand.
I si‐‐ (scoffs)
627
00:25:31,780 --> 00:25:33,782
‐I don't understand you.
‐(woman coughing)
628
00:25:34,491 --> 00:25:36,618
Oh, my God.
Now she's drinking coffee!
629
00:25:36,702 --> 00:25:38,495
‐Richard: Who's that?
‐Larry: It's unbelievable.
630
00:25:38,579 --> 00:25:40,664
‐Richard: Who?
‐Susie's friend. I saw her
in the gym the other day.
631
00:25:40,748 --> 00:25:43,083
She's eight months pregnant.
She was running on a treadmill.
632
00:25:43,792 --> 00:25:45,836
She has no regard
for this fetus.
633
00:25:45,919 --> 00:25:47,504
Now she's drinking coffee.
634
00:25:47,588 --> 00:25:51,050
This coffee, by the way,
is unbelievable.
It's fantastic.
635
00:25:51,133 --> 00:25:53,010
‐Is it hot?
‐It's very hot.
636
00:25:53,093 --> 00:25:56,180
‐Let me see that for a second.
‐Hey, don't touch my‐‐
I don't like‐‐ Don't touch it.
637
00:25:56,263 --> 00:25:58,223
What the‐‐ Hey, stop it!
638
00:25:58,932 --> 00:26:00,726
What are you,
a fuckin' goose?
639
00:26:00,809 --> 00:26:03,103
Okay. That's not
hot coffee, okay?
640
00:26:03,187 --> 00:26:05,314
If that was hot coffee,
I, I would have burned my nose.
641
00:26:05,397 --> 00:26:08,233
Who asked for a nose test?
I didn't want a nose test!
642
00:26:08,317 --> 00:26:09,985
‐What, are you
outta your mind?
‐Not hot.
643
00:26:10,069 --> 00:26:11,487
What the hell
is going on here?
644
00:26:11,570 --> 00:26:13,572
‐Is he bothering you,
Mr. Lewis?
‐Yes, he's bothering me.
645
00:26:13,655 --> 00:26:15,908
‐Oh, really?
‐Richard: Yeah, really.
646
00:26:15,991 --> 00:26:18,202
You know what, Larry?
Get out.
647
00:26:18,285 --> 00:26:20,204
‐Huh.
‐This is what it's come to.
648
00:26:20,287 --> 00:26:23,499
You're banned. For life.
I never wanna see you
in here again.
649
00:26:23,582 --> 00:26:27,127
‐Is that so?
‐Yeah. You're banned.
Banned! Get out!
650
00:26:27,211 --> 00:26:29,338
With pleasure.
651
00:26:30,964 --> 00:26:32,382
♪
652
00:26:32,466 --> 00:26:34,468
Mark my words, Mocha Joe,
653
00:26:35,219 --> 00:26:36,845
and mark them well.
654
00:26:36,929 --> 00:26:40,015
I don't know how,
and I don't know when,
655
00:26:40,098 --> 00:26:42,309
but I will exact vengeance.
656
00:26:42,392 --> 00:26:43,977
As God is my witness,
657
00:26:44,061 --> 00:26:47,856
I will bring you to the brink
of extinction,
658
00:26:47,940 --> 00:26:50,108
or I will die trying.
659
00:26:50,776 --> 00:26:53,487
‐Happy New Year, Mocha Joe!
‐Happy New Year, Larry.
660
00:26:53,570 --> 00:26:54,738
Hey, Happy New Year, man.
661
00:26:54,822 --> 00:26:56,615
Happy New Year.
662
00:26:56,698 --> 00:26:58,492
♪ ♪
663
00:27:07,668 --> 00:27:10,337
(phone ringing)
664
00:27:11,129 --> 00:27:12,673
Hello, Larry David's office.
665
00:27:12,756 --> 00:27:14,341
Valerie (over phone):
Hi, my name is Valerie Ashburn.
666
00:27:14,424 --> 00:27:15,759
I'd like to speak
to Larry David.
667
00:27:15,843 --> 00:27:17,553
Yes, may I ask
what this is regarding?
668
00:27:17,636 --> 00:27:21,682
Sure. This is regarding him
sexually assaulting me
at a party.
669
00:27:22,057 --> 00:27:24,768
Oh, my gosh. I'm so sorry.
What‐‐
670
00:27:24,852 --> 00:27:26,436
What happened?
671
00:27:26,520 --> 00:27:27,771
I was catering at a party.
672
00:27:27,855 --> 00:27:30,440
Larry was molesting me
with his eyes
673
00:27:30,524 --> 00:27:33,318
the entire night.
And then when I went
into a pantry,
674
00:27:33,402 --> 00:27:35,612
he followed me in,
cornered me,
675
00:27:35,696 --> 00:27:37,739
and he grabbed my breast.
I was lucky to get out of there.
676
00:27:37,823 --> 00:27:41,243
‐You know he did something
like that to me, too?
‐Valerie: No.
677
00:27:41,326 --> 00:27:43,495
‐Oh, my God.
‐Alice: Yeah.
678
00:27:43,579 --> 00:27:45,414
Everything was fine.
And one day he...
679
00:27:45,497 --> 00:27:47,207
asked about a tattoo
I have on my arm,
680
00:27:47,291 --> 00:27:48,417
and I wouldn't tell him
what it meant,
681
00:27:48,500 --> 00:27:49,710
and then he got
obsessive about it.
682
00:27:49,793 --> 00:27:51,295
And why did I have it
on my arm,
683
00:27:51,378 --> 00:27:53,839
and why didn't I
have it on my butt,
somewhere private.
684
00:27:53,922 --> 00:27:55,507
Okay. So this is a pattern.
685
00:27:55,591 --> 00:27:57,885
Alice:
Oh, yeah. And that's
just the beginning.
686
00:28:11,815 --> 00:28:13,525
What the fuck!
687
00:28:14,651 --> 00:28:15,903
Fuck!
688
00:28:15,986 --> 00:28:17,905
(gags)
689
00:28:19,489 --> 00:28:21,074
(groans)
690
00:28:23,327 --> 00:28:24,786
Shit.
691
00:28:25,579 --> 00:28:28,290
Damn it. Frickin' dog.
692
00:28:29,082 --> 00:28:32,002
And he grabbed my shirt
to wipe his glasses.
693
00:28:32,085 --> 00:28:34,421
Hold on.
I have to shut the door.
694
00:28:39,301 --> 00:28:41,887
‐Larry?
‐Larry: I'll be out
in a second.
695
00:28:41,970 --> 00:28:43,597
Okay.
696
00:28:49,353 --> 00:28:50,854
‐What's with the robe?
‐Larry: Oh.
697
00:28:50,938 --> 00:28:53,732
'Cause I spit cereal up
all over my shirt,
698
00:28:53,815 --> 00:28:55,525
because there was
dog hair in it.
699
00:28:55,609 --> 00:28:57,444
‐(groans) Disgusting.
‐Larry: Right?
700
00:28:57,527 --> 00:29:00,739
So... what's going on?
What do you...
701
00:29:00,822 --> 00:29:03,450
What, what are you doing here?
You haven't been here in a year.
702
00:29:03,533 --> 00:29:05,369
What the fuck is
going on with you?
703
00:29:05,452 --> 00:29:07,412
‐What are you talking about?
‐You're wearing a MAGA hat
704
00:29:07,496 --> 00:29:08,872
at a sushi restaurant?
705
00:29:08,956 --> 00:29:11,625
‐Is that true?
‐Well, I did have
the hat on, yeah.
706
00:29:11,708 --> 00:29:13,877
‐What, are you pro‐Trump?
‐No, no.
707
00:29:13,961 --> 00:29:15,587
Look, I got this idea
to wear that hat
708
00:29:15,671 --> 00:29:18,048
‐so I wouldn't have to have
lunch with Phil Rosenthal.
‐Mm.
709
00:29:18,131 --> 00:29:21,051
And it worked like a charm.
He saw me in the hat
and he left the restaurant.
710
00:29:21,134 --> 00:29:22,719
‐It was amazing.
‐I'm not surprised.
711
00:29:22,803 --> 00:29:24,846
You know what?
It's really comin' in handy.
712
00:29:24,930 --> 00:29:27,224
Yeah, 'cause no one's gonna
wanna be anywhere near you.
713
00:29:27,307 --> 00:29:29,935
Exactly!
It's, it's a great
people repellent.
714
00:29:30,811 --> 00:29:32,896
‐(groans)
‐You know, look.
When you're a celebrity,
715
00:29:32,980 --> 00:29:35,565
you can do anything you want.
You can grab 'em by the pussy‐‐
716
00:29:35,649 --> 00:29:37,567
‐What did you say?
‐What?
717
00:29:37,651 --> 00:29:39,111
Why are you wearing
a bathrobe?
718
00:29:39,194 --> 00:29:42,781
‐And that hat!
‐Oh, no, no! No, I‐‐
(stammering)
719
00:29:42,864 --> 00:29:45,534
Oh, my God!
You're friends
with that monster?
720
00:29:45,617 --> 00:29:46,785
‐No, I'm‐‐
‐Alice: No!
721
00:29:46,868 --> 00:29:48,745
‐No, no, no, no, no!
‐No! No, no, I'm just‐‐
722
00:29:48,829 --> 00:29:49,913
Alice:
I'm getting a lawyer!
723
00:29:49,997 --> 00:29:51,581
No! What? Hey! What?
724
00:29:51,665 --> 00:29:53,083
No! I'm in the bathrobe
725
00:29:53,166 --> 00:29:54,584
'cause your fuckin' dog
got hair
726
00:29:54,668 --> 00:29:55,794
all over my cereal bowl,
727
00:29:55,877 --> 00:29:57,462
and that's not Weinstein!
728
00:29:57,546 --> 00:30:00,173
♪ ♪
729
00:30:19,651 --> 00:30:22,279
‐I'll take it.
‐It's all yours.
730
00:30:22,362 --> 00:30:25,365
♪
731
00:30:34,166 --> 00:30:35,417
What are you doin' here, Larry?
732
00:30:35,500 --> 00:30:37,085
I thought I told
you to get out
and not come back.
733
00:30:37,169 --> 00:30:39,880
Yeah, so you did, Mocha Joe.
So you did.
734
00:30:39,963 --> 00:30:41,715
I've merely come to inform you
735
00:30:41,798 --> 00:30:44,426
that I have leased
the place next door,
736
00:30:44,509 --> 00:30:47,012
where I'll be opening up
a coffee shop
737
00:30:47,095 --> 00:30:49,139
exactly the same as yours.
738
00:30:49,222 --> 00:30:51,683
Only charging
much lower prices.
739
00:30:51,767 --> 00:30:53,810
All for the express purpose
740
00:30:53,894 --> 00:30:55,729
of taking you down.
741
00:30:55,812 --> 00:30:58,065
Knock yourself out.
I welcome the competition.
742
00:30:58,148 --> 00:31:00,692
‐Yeah.
‐I'm not afraid of you.
You don't have the beans.
743
00:31:00,776 --> 00:31:03,945
I'm the only guy
in Los Angeles
who has these beans.
744
00:31:04,029 --> 00:31:06,114
‐Yeah. I'll get beans.
‐Oh, you won't find
better beans
745
00:31:06,198 --> 00:31:07,574
‐than my beans.
‐I'll get better beans.
746
00:31:07,657 --> 00:31:09,367
‐No such thing as better beans.
‐There are better beans,
747
00:31:09,451 --> 00:31:10,911
‐Mocha Joe.
‐No better beans, Larry.
748
00:31:10,994 --> 00:31:13,330
‐I will find better beans.
‐Mm‐hmm, good luck.
749
00:31:13,413 --> 00:31:14,956
See ya, Larry.
750
00:31:15,040 --> 00:31:17,250
‐You know what
I'm gonna call it?
‐What?
751
00:31:17,334 --> 00:31:20,128
Latte Larry's.
752
00:31:24,591 --> 00:31:27,094
(panting)
753
00:31:30,097 --> 00:31:32,015
(doorbell chimes)
754
00:31:32,099 --> 00:31:34,726
♪
755
00:31:45,946 --> 00:31:47,572
Can I come in?
756
00:31:48,865 --> 00:31:50,117
Y‐yes.
757
00:31:50,200 --> 00:31:51,701
‐Yes, yes.
‐Are you sure?
758
00:31:51,785 --> 00:31:54,538
Yeah, I'm positive.
I'm a little surprised,
is all.
759
00:31:54,621 --> 00:31:56,289
‐Come in.
‐Okay.
760
00:31:56,373 --> 00:31:57,541
‐Wow.
‐Well...
761
00:31:57,624 --> 00:31:59,042
Holy cow. I can't‐‐
762
00:31:59,126 --> 00:32:01,378
‐I can't believe you're here.
‐You told me, right? I mean‐‐
763
00:32:01,461 --> 00:32:03,797
Um...
764
00:32:05,924 --> 00:32:07,342
Give me two minutes.
765
00:32:07,425 --> 00:32:09,511
Two minutes.
I'll be right back.
Stay right there.
766
00:32:13,640 --> 00:32:16,726
‐Leon: Ha‐ha! (yells)
‐(TV playing indistinctly)
767
00:32:16,810 --> 00:32:18,812
(Leon laughing)
768
00:32:19,062 --> 00:32:20,981
(knocking continues)
769
00:32:21,815 --> 00:32:23,984
‐Fuckin' my movie up.
What you want?
‐I need that talcum powder.
770
00:32:24,067 --> 00:32:27,445
‐What you got goin' on?
‐It's an emergency.
Get me the talcum powder!
771
00:32:27,529 --> 00:32:28,655
Leon:
Fuck!
772
00:32:29,406 --> 00:32:30,991
Who you tappin'?
773
00:32:31,074 --> 00:32:32,617
Cheryl.
774
00:32:33,076 --> 00:32:37,289
What? My man Larry David
re‐tappin' that ass!
775
00:32:42,502 --> 00:32:43,837
Ooh.
776
00:32:45,005 --> 00:32:46,339
Ooh.
777
00:32:46,423 --> 00:32:48,425
‐(Cheryl coughing)
‐(Larry coughing)
778
00:32:48,508 --> 00:32:50,677
(huffing, coughing)
779
00:32:50,760 --> 00:32:53,805
(Cheryl gasps)
Did you powder down there?
780
00:32:53,889 --> 00:32:56,600
‐No good?
‐(coughs) I'm allergic.
781
00:32:56,683 --> 00:32:59,352
Oh! Oh, my God.
782
00:32:59,436 --> 00:33:01,396
‐Oh, my God.
‐(coughing)
783
00:33:01,479 --> 00:33:02,981
‐Oh, my God.
‐(gasping)
784
00:33:03,064 --> 00:33:05,567
‐Oh! Call 9‐1‐1!
‐(coughing)
785
00:33:05,650 --> 00:33:08,403
‐Easy.
‐(coughing)
786
00:33:08,695 --> 00:33:10,488
Hey. Jesus, slow down.
787
00:33:10,572 --> 00:33:13,366
‐What happened?
‐Oh, she, uh, swallowed
some talcum powder,
788
00:33:13,450 --> 00:33:15,327
and is having
an allergic reaction to it.
789
00:33:15,410 --> 00:33:16,745
Did she ingest anything else?
790
00:33:17,078 --> 00:33:18,580
(gasps)
791
00:33:18,872 --> 00:33:21,166
Kind of a personal question,
don't you think?
792
00:33:24,878 --> 00:33:26,379
So sorry!
793
00:33:28,673 --> 00:33:30,550
Oh, my God.
You look so much better.
794
00:33:30,634 --> 00:33:33,178
‐Do I?
‐Oh. (stammering)
Are you kidding?
795
00:33:33,261 --> 00:33:35,096
I couldn't even
look at you before.
I mean, it was...
796
00:33:35,180 --> 00:33:38,308
really, like, hideous.
You looked... disgusting.
797
00:33:38,391 --> 00:33:40,018
I could barely glance at you.
798
00:33:40,101 --> 00:33:41,645
Yeah, because of you.
799
00:33:41,728 --> 00:33:43,104
‐Yeah.
‐You're the one that
800
00:33:43,188 --> 00:33:45,148
put the talcum powder‐‐
Uh, I'm allergic, and you‐‐
801
00:33:45,232 --> 00:33:47,817
‐It's because of you.
‐Yeah. Yeah,
I'm sorry about that.
802
00:33:47,901 --> 00:33:49,945
Yeah. But you know,
I was thinking,
803
00:33:50,028 --> 00:33:52,822
if that happened
when we were married
and your face...
804
00:33:52,906 --> 00:33:55,367
for some reason,
stayed that way,
805
00:33:55,909 --> 00:33:57,494
what would I have done?
806
00:33:57,953 --> 00:33:59,704
What do you mean
what would you have done?
807
00:33:59,788 --> 00:34:02,666
Well, I mean,
could I have lived with you
looking like that?
808
00:34:02,749 --> 00:34:05,001
‐You're such an asshole.
‐(both laughing)
809
00:34:05,085 --> 00:34:08,380
You are such... I mean, I'm,
I'm fighting for my life,
810
00:34:08,463 --> 00:34:10,507
and this is what you're...
Susie?
811
00:34:10,590 --> 00:34:11,758
What are you guys doing here?
812
00:34:12,259 --> 00:34:13,802
What are you‐‐
What are you doing here?
813
00:34:13,885 --> 00:34:16,179
Susie:
Randi had contractions,
and...
814
00:34:16,263 --> 00:34:18,682
She's walking around the halls
trying to induce,
815
00:34:18,765 --> 00:34:21,518
'cause nothing's happening,
so I thought I'd come
and keep her company.
816
00:34:21,601 --> 00:34:24,312
‐Randi's here?
‐Yeah. Cheryl, what happened?
817
00:34:24,396 --> 00:34:27,440
‐She got stung by a wasp.
‐I had an allergic reaction
to shellfish.
818
00:34:28,525 --> 00:34:29,859
Okay.
819
00:34:29,943 --> 00:34:33,321
I knew it.
I knew something was
going on with you two.
820
00:34:33,405 --> 00:34:34,698
I could smell it.
821
00:34:34,781 --> 00:34:36,866
That night at our house.
The ventriloquist.
822
00:34:36,950 --> 00:34:40,036
He drove you home.
Something's been going on here.
823
00:34:40,120 --> 00:34:41,663
I knew it. I knew it!
824
00:34:41,746 --> 00:34:43,748
Bravo!
825
00:34:43,832 --> 00:34:45,375
‐Bravo, Poirot.
‐(phone chimes)
826
00:34:45,458 --> 00:34:47,210
Cheryl:
Oh, no. Hey.
827
00:34:47,294 --> 00:34:51,381
‐Ted is in the garage.
‐Larry: What?
828
00:34:51,464 --> 00:34:53,258
‐He's on his way up.
‐Larry: What?
829
00:34:53,341 --> 00:34:54,551
You‐‐ You can't be here.
830
00:34:54,634 --> 00:34:56,469
You better leave.
You better leave, Larry.
831
00:34:56,553 --> 00:34:58,221
How does he‐‐
How does he know
you're in the hospital?
832
00:34:58,305 --> 00:34:59,723
Because he just flew in
from San Francisco
833
00:34:59,806 --> 00:35:01,141
and he texted me
when he landed. I...
834
00:35:01,224 --> 00:35:02,976
Because he's her
significant other,
835
00:35:03,059 --> 00:35:04,728
and you're her
significant nothing!
836
00:35:04,811 --> 00:35:07,188
‐Just keep your
fuckin' trap shut!
‐Susie: Go!
837
00:35:08,732 --> 00:35:09,691
Oh.
838
00:35:10,483 --> 00:35:12,444
‐(Larry grunts)
‐Hey!
839
00:35:12,819 --> 00:35:14,613
‐(Larry grunts)
‐Doctor: Just slow down!
840
00:35:15,155 --> 00:35:16,948
‐Excuse me, sir!
‐(Larry grunts)
841
00:35:18,992 --> 00:35:20,994
(Larry and Randi shriek)
842
00:35:22,078 --> 00:35:24,331
‐God!
‐Larry: Oh! Oh, my God!
843
00:35:24,414 --> 00:35:26,207
‐Larry!
‐You?
844
00:35:26,291 --> 00:35:29,085
Are you fucking kidding me,
you piece of shit?
845
00:35:29,169 --> 00:35:31,212
Okay, if anything
happens to this baby,
846
00:35:31,296 --> 00:35:32,714
it's gonna be your fault.
847
00:35:32,797 --> 00:35:34,591
Oh, please.
After what that fetus
has been through,
848
00:35:34,674 --> 00:35:36,134
this'll be a day
at the beach.
849
00:35:37,010 --> 00:35:38,678
Happy New Year!
850
00:35:39,471 --> 00:35:41,640
(theme music playing)
851
00:36:43,576 --> 00:36:44,577
LARRY DAVID:
It's a coffee place.
852
00:36:44,911 --> 00:36:46,454
I'm opening up a spite store
to take him out of business.
853
00:36:46,538 --> 00:36:48,873
I don't know what a spite store
is and I don't really care.
854
00:36:48,957 --> 00:36:49,999
♪ (UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYS) ♪
855
00:36:50,083 --> 00:36:51,668
Can I give you a little tip?
856
00:36:51,751 --> 00:36:53,253
If you're gonna
confront somebody,
857
00:36:53,336 --> 00:36:55,046
better to do it with pants on.
858
00:36:55,130 --> 00:36:56,047
The shorts...
859
00:36:56,381 --> 00:36:58,717
It's hard to take a person
seriously wearing shorts.
860
00:36:58,800 --> 00:37:00,135
I wanna give you a heads up.
861
00:37:00,343 --> 00:37:01,678
Susie's birthday's
in about a week.
862
00:37:01,761 --> 00:37:03,722
I already got her something.
It's gonna be a nice surprise.
863
00:37:03,805 --> 00:37:04,764
What is it?
864
00:37:05,682 --> 00:37:06,850
JEFF GARLIN:
What were you thinking?
865
00:37:06,933 --> 00:37:08,059
I'm done with presents!
866
00:37:08,143 --> 00:37:09,310
My birthday's coming up
in a month.
867
00:37:09,394 --> 00:37:10,770
‐What are you getting me?!
‐Nothing!
868
00:37:10,854 --> 00:37:12,689
‐Oh, thank you!
‐You're welcome!
869
00:37:12,772 --> 00:37:13,565
(GROANS)
870
00:37:13,648 --> 00:37:15,650
♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪