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00:00:04,754 --> 00:00:08,008
♪ ("CURB YOUR ENTHUSIASM"
THEME MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
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00:00:11,845 --> 00:00:13,722
♪ (THEME MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪
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- (CELL PHONE RINGING)
- Huh?
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Hello?
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GINA GROSSBARD: Larry,
it's Gina Grossbard.
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- Stu had a stroke.
- Who?
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GINA: Stu Grossbard.
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From the club.
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What?
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GINA: I thought
you'd want to know.
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♪ (WHIMSICAL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
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Why the fuck'd she call me?
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(SCOFFS)
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Yeah, it's like at three o'clock
in the morning.
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I don't even know
the guy hardly.
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- It's ridiculous.
- So crazy. It's nuts.
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What am I doing on that list
of middle-of-the-night calls?
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I don't understand it.
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Better you than me.
That's insane.
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- The worst part?
- FREDDY FUNKHOUSER: Yeah?
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Now I'm on a text chain
with his wife and the family.
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Those chains. I've been on 'em.
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- They're the worst thing ever.
- (CELL PHONE CHIMES)
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- (SCOFFS)
- Wait a second. I bet this
is another one. Yeah. Oh, yeah.
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- The chain? That's crazy.
- LARRY DAVID: It's--
(CHUCKLES) It's the chain.
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"Hope you're feeling
better today.
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My niece just drew this
for Stu."
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- FREDDY: Yeah.
- Look.
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Look. Look at the picture.
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- You gotta heart that.
Just heart it.
- (CELL PHONE CHIMES)
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Oh, another one. Holy cow.
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- It's a nuisance.
- It's never gonna stop.
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LARRY: And I can't just
drop out, they'll see I left.
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Listen to this.
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"My family and I are here
whenever anyone needs anything.
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Martha's beef stew
is absolute perfection
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and really heals all wounds."
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It's really, honestly,
like, the lowest form
of human communication.
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Hey, guess what?
I got a date tonight.
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- Wow.
- With an artist.
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- Really?
- LARRY: Yeah. She's painting me
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as part of a series
of old Jewish comedians
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called Wisenheimers.
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- I think Richard sat for that.
- LARRY: Yeah, yeah, I think so.
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Yeah, he said she was cute.
He asked her out, but he said
it didn't go anywhere.
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Oh, well, you know.
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- Maybe he should've...
- Some of us have it.
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...gone to Atlanta
and given some water to someone
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- in the voting line, maybe. Huh?
- Perhaps he should've
given some water.
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- ♪ (QUIRKY MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
- Dig this.
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Susie has got
a textile convention
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in North Carolina,
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- and she wants me
to go with her.
- What?
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Yep.
What's a textile convention?
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You're not going to that.
That's ridiculous.
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- No, she already bought tickets.
- What?
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And dig this.
Because it's last minute,
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- middle fucking seats.
- Oh, you can't go.
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JEFF GREENE:
How am I gonna get out?
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- Guys, can I do this here?
- Oh, so sorry.
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- Ugh. The whole day.
- JEFF: Eh.
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- You're not having
the greatest game.
- No.
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- All right, I'm gonna
give you that. Pick it up.
- No cigar.
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She's insane.
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LARRY: No, you gotta
get out of that thing.
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What? What the hell?
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- The fuck's he doing?
- What?
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- Are you drinking?
- What is that?
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Just a little swing juice.
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- Swing juice?
- FREDDY: Yeah.
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- What's in it?
- I go with iced tea
and a little bit of just vodka.
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You look like a derelict
with that thing.
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You mean a gentleman.
Here's looking up your address.
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That's bizarre. (SNIFFS)
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Hey, you know what?
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I think I got a way
to get out of this trip for you.
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- How? Yeah.
- You have this dream, okay?
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And it's like a nightmare
about the plane.
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And in the dream,
you're thinking,
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"Oh, I'm on a-- the middle seat.
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Can't breathe.
It's too tight. No room."
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She'll wake up,
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and you'll tell her
what the dream's about,
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and she'll be
very concerned about you,
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and she'll say,
"Eh, okay, don't go."
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- I like it. That's good.
- LARRY: Huh? Is that good?
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- That's pretty great. Yeah.
- It's a dream scheme. Let--
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- Let's see you do it.
- All right. Uh...
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(MOANS)
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- (WHIMPERS)
- (LAUGHS)
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Middle seat! Can't breathe.
Oh, they're squeezing me!
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Wake up! Wake up!
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- (SCREAMING)
- Wake up!
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- Jeffrey, wake up! Wake up!
- What? What? Oh.
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You were having a bad dream.
What's going on?
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I was having
a panic attack. I...
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(IMITATES SUSIE GREENE)
You're not going on the trip.
I'm gonna go. You stay home.
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- Do you like that?
- I love it.
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- LARRY: It's worth a shot.
- It's worth a shot.
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LARRY: All right.
Pretty good so far, huh?
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- RENEE HOLCOMB: So far.
- You wanna be on my talk show?
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- Of course.
- All right, we're back.
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(LAUGHS)
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Our next guest is a young artist
from Los Angeles.
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Her name's Renee Holcomb.
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Please give her
a nice round of applause.
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- Yeah.
- (LAUGHS)
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- LARRY: Renee, welcome.
- Thank you.
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I understand you have
an art show coming up soon.
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I do.
It's my Wisenheimer series.
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Now, did you paint Larry David?
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- RENEE: I did. I did.
- (CHUCKLES)
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I heard he's just
an incredible person.
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And an incredible face.
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You know? It's Picasso-esque.
You know, a little asymmetrical.
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- Asymmetrical?
- Well, you know, just slightly.
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All right. Thank you
for being on our show tonight.
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- (RENEE LAUGHS)
- And our next guest...
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Okay, I've got the key lime pie
and the herbal tea.
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- Thank you.
- Enjoy.
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Well, thanks
for being on my show.
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It's a pleasure.
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Mm.
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- Mm. Hold on.
- No good?
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- Oh, God. Mm. Mm-mm.
- Let me taste it.
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What do you think?
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- Ugh! Ugh!
- Yeah. Right?
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- Oh, it's disgusting. Excuse me.
- It's terrible. Tart.
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- Hi. Yeah.
- I'm sorry to bother you.
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- This pie.
- You don't like it?
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- It's really awful. Yeah.
- Oh. It really--
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- Inedible. Really.
- It looked like
you were both enjoying it.
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The grimace looked like
we were enjoying it?
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I'm gonna get this
off the bill for you.
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- Thank you.
- Perfect. Thank you.
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Everything else has been lovely.
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Looked like we were enjoying it?
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I'll show you what it looks like
when I enjoy something.
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- What do you wanna do
after this, by the way?
- (LAUGHS)
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- MANAGER: Hi, there.
- Oh.
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- RENEE: Hi.
- Oh, hello.
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- This is yours, correct?
- RENEE: It is.
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Well, unfortunately,
a little bad news.
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I'm not gonna be able
to take this
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- off of your bill tonight.
- Why?
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It's halfway gone.
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- You guys ate a lot of pie.
- LARRY: Is this a joke?
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It's not a joke. What you ate
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went past the threshold
of returnability.
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Okay,
I took a robust bite initially
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because it's dessert.
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Then I took a tentative bite
to confirm that it was gross,
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- and then he took a bite.
- Three bites.
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She took one bite.
She said, "This tastes awful."
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A second bite,
"Yes, it is awful."
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And you take a large bite
at that point?
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That's the part
that doesn't make sense.
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You have to take a large bite.
How else do you confirm?
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You can't confirm
on a small bite.
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- RENEE: Right.
- You don't get enough taste.
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- That's three huge bites.
- You know what?
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- Charge me double for it.
- I don't need to.
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She's an artist.
She's a libertine.
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We're going back to my house.
We're gonna have sex.
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We're gonna forget
about this horrible experience.
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- Exactly.
- LARRY: Okay?
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- We're gonna have great sex.
- So there. Yeah.
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- You two are gonna have sex?
- Yes.
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Yeah, you got a problem
with that?
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- No. No problem.
- Let me ask you a question.
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- Who made this pie?
- Chef made the pie.
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- No wonder.
- No wonder?
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- LARRY: No wonder.
- Hmm.
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Would you like me
to go grab Chef,
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and you can give him
your thoughts?
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Yeah, go get Chef.
You think I'm afraid of Chef?
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I don't know if you are,
but I think you should be.
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- Oh. Oh, I'm so scared of Chef.
- Yeah, get Chef. We don't care.
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I think when you meet Chef,
you're gonna change your tune
a little bit.
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- LARRY: Oh, you think so?
You think so?
- Yeah.
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BOTH: Go get Chef. Go get Chef.
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MANAGER: You're gonna regret
this choice.
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I'm the nice one
of the two of us.
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Okay. Yeah, get-- Oh, get Chef.
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- ♪ (QUIRKY MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
- Let's get the fuck out of here.
186
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How'd you sleep?
187
00:06:45,530 --> 00:06:47,115
- Not good.
- Really?
188
00:06:47,115 --> 00:06:48,742
- (CHUCKLES) Yeah.
- Why?
189
00:06:50,410 --> 00:06:52,662
- Oh, yeah. New person.
- Yeah.
190
00:06:52,662 --> 00:06:54,706
- Mm-hmm. It's weird.
- Yeah. Yeah.
191
00:06:54,706 --> 00:06:57,375
Well, aside from the insomnia,
192
00:06:57,375 --> 00:06:59,878
- everything else was amazing.
- Really?
193
00:06:59,878 --> 00:07:01,880
- Mm-hmm.
- Huh.
194
00:07:01,880 --> 00:07:06,551
- Are you suggesting an encore?
- ♪ (ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
195
00:07:06,551 --> 00:07:08,011
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Right there. Right there.
196
00:07:08,011 --> 00:07:10,430
- (LAUGHS) Yes!
- LARRY: Huh? Oh. Huh? Huh?
197
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- Huh?
- RENEE: (SIGHS) Uh-huh.
198
00:07:11,973 --> 00:07:13,516
- (SCREAMS)
- (SHRIEKS)
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- DAHLIA: What? (SCREAMS)
- (SCREAMS)
200
00:07:16,436 --> 00:07:17,645
- (SCREAMS) No, no.
- (LARRY STAMMERS)
201
00:07:17,645 --> 00:07:22,609
- (SCREAMS)
- (SHRIEKS)
202
00:07:22,609 --> 00:07:24,652
- LARRY: What the hell?
- Larry, who the fuck is that?
203
00:07:24,652 --> 00:07:26,488
- It's the housekeeper!
- Why didn't she knock?
204
00:07:26,488 --> 00:07:27,906
She's not supposed to be here!
It's her day off!
205
00:07:27,906 --> 00:07:29,699
- She should've knocked.
- LARRY: She should've knocked!
206
00:07:29,699 --> 00:07:32,118
You knock! You knock!
Hey, you always knock!
207
00:07:32,118 --> 00:07:33,703
You always knock. It's true.
208
00:07:33,703 --> 00:07:35,830
- Ah, she seems freaked out.
- LARRY: Oh, yeah?
209
00:07:35,830 --> 00:07:38,541
- What gave you that impression?
- I mean, I don't get it.
210
00:07:38,541 --> 00:07:39,918
It's not like you don't have
one of your own. It's--
211
00:07:39,918 --> 00:07:41,753
- Think I better go talk to her.
- I'm gonna get dressed.
212
00:07:41,753 --> 00:07:43,088
Call me later.
Let me know how it goes.
213
00:07:43,088 --> 00:07:46,257
- Oh, I can't wait for this.
- (RENEE LAUGHING)
214
00:07:46,257 --> 00:07:47,759
It was great, until it wasn't.
215
00:07:47,759 --> 00:07:49,135
LARRY: If I don't see you, goodbye.
216
00:07:49,135 --> 00:07:51,262
(CHUCKLES) Goodbye, Larry.
217
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♪ (WHIMSICAL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
218
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(GROANS)
219
00:08:00,271 --> 00:08:02,941
Hey. (SIGHS) Um...
220
00:08:02,941 --> 00:08:06,569
I thought--
I thought it was your day off.
221
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No, it wasn't.
222
00:08:08,780 --> 00:08:14,494
Anyway, uh, I--
I know what you saw, and, uh...
223
00:08:14,494 --> 00:08:18,123
You know, I don't know
the nature of your experiences,
224
00:08:18,123 --> 00:08:22,293
but, uh, a lot of women seem
to find pleasure in that.
225
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(CHUCKLES) You know, go figure.
226
00:08:24,587 --> 00:08:26,506
I don't know.
I didn't wanna do it.
227
00:08:26,506 --> 00:08:29,509
I-- She asked me.
Oh, she practically begged me.
228
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"Oh, I want-- I like this,
I like this, I like this,
229
00:08:32,137 --> 00:08:34,222
I like this, I like this."
What am I supposed to do?
230
00:08:34,222 --> 00:08:36,433
I didn't wanna be rude.
You know, I'm a gentleman.
231
00:08:36,433 --> 00:08:37,976
It's a chivalrous thing to do.
232
00:08:37,976 --> 00:08:40,603
You know, it's like a gentleman
holds the door open for women,
233
00:08:40,603 --> 00:08:42,397
a gentleman puts
the toilet seat down,
234
00:08:42,397 --> 00:08:46,026
- and a gentleman, eh... (GROANS)
- (GROANS)
235
00:08:46,026 --> 00:08:49,320
(BOTH GROANING)
236
00:08:49,320 --> 00:08:50,864
Whoo! Dahlia!
237
00:08:50,864 --> 00:08:52,949
(CHUCKLES)
What's going down, girl?
238
00:08:52,949 --> 00:08:54,534
Um, I gotta work.
239
00:08:55,201 --> 00:08:56,202
Bye.
240
00:08:56,995 --> 00:08:59,956
- What's wrong with her?
- Incident.
241
00:09:00,373 --> 00:09:01,624
Incident?
242
00:09:02,167 --> 00:09:03,501
Come out.
243
00:09:03,501 --> 00:09:06,338
- (SIGHS) You got her pregnant?
- No. No.
244
00:09:06,338 --> 00:09:07,881
- It's not that.
- Give it to me.
245
00:09:07,881 --> 00:09:10,175
Well, Renee, the artist
I was telling you about.
246
00:09:10,175 --> 00:09:12,719
- LEON BLACK: Okay. Mm-hmm.
- Yeah, we were upstairs.
247
00:09:12,719 --> 00:09:16,181
Dahlia walked in on us
when I was downtown.
248
00:09:16,181 --> 00:09:19,351
- Oh. And yo ass--
- Yeah, she didn't take it well.
249
00:09:19,351 --> 00:09:20,852
What the fuck
you doing downtown?
250
00:09:20,852 --> 00:09:22,687
- You don't need to be downtown.
- Yeah.
251
00:09:22,687 --> 00:09:24,439
Downtown is fucking dangerous,
you understand?
252
00:09:24,439 --> 00:09:25,940
- Mm.
- You more of an uptown person.
253
00:09:25,940 --> 00:09:27,525
Don't get me wrong,
I love it uptown,
254
00:09:27,525 --> 00:09:30,487
but I will venture downtown,
you know, on occasion.
255
00:09:30,487 --> 00:09:32,072
What about you?
Are you a downtown guy?
256
00:09:32,072 --> 00:09:33,114
Yeah, I'm good.
257
00:09:33,114 --> 00:09:34,783
I can fuck around
and do a TED Talk to that shit.
258
00:09:34,783 --> 00:09:36,326
I'll have a pussy TED Talk.
259
00:09:36,326 --> 00:09:38,620
Get all the guys in one room,
get a little microphone,
260
00:09:38,620 --> 00:09:40,163
get a little laser pointer
and shit.
261
00:09:40,163 --> 00:09:41,998
Like, "This is a pussy. See?"
262
00:09:41,998 --> 00:09:44,542
- (LAUGHS)
- Yeah, I'm good at that shit.
263
00:09:44,542 --> 00:09:45,835
I go through all
the fucking zones.
264
00:09:45,835 --> 00:09:47,420
- LARRY: Uh-huh.
- All the eromenous zones.
265
00:09:47,420 --> 00:09:49,381
- Yeah. Erogenous.
- Eronenous zones.
266
00:09:49,381 --> 00:09:51,049
- Erogenous.
- Erotenous.
267
00:09:51,049 --> 00:09:53,051
- Erogenous zones, yeah.
- Erogenous zones.
268
00:09:53,051 --> 00:09:54,552
I know all the fucking zones
and shit.
269
00:09:54,552 --> 00:09:56,388
Gotta know where to lick at
and where to tickle.
270
00:09:56,388 --> 00:09:58,765
- (CELL PHONE RINGING)
- No caller ID.
271
00:09:58,765 --> 00:10:00,558
Hate that shit. Hey, do you.
272
00:10:00,558 --> 00:10:02,811
- Hello.
- GINA: Larry, it's Gina.
273
00:10:04,312 --> 00:10:05,772
- Who?
- GINA: Stu's wife.
274
00:10:05,772 --> 00:10:08,400
- He had a stroke.
- Oh!
275
00:10:08,400 --> 00:10:10,318
Yeah, right, right.
276
00:10:11,236 --> 00:10:13,363
- How's he doing?
- GINA: Not great, Larry.
277
00:10:13,363 --> 00:10:14,531
Touch and go.
278
00:10:14,531 --> 00:10:17,075
- I'd love to have lunch
with you tomorrow.
- Lunch?
279
00:10:17,075 --> 00:10:19,744
GINA:
There's something very important
I need to talk to you about.
280
00:10:19,744 --> 00:10:21,121
- Me?
- GINA: Yes.
281
00:10:21,121 --> 00:10:22,455
Thank you so much, Larry.
282
00:10:22,455 --> 00:10:26,251
I'll send you the information.
You're on the text chain, right?
283
00:10:26,251 --> 00:10:27,877
Oh, yeah, yeah, the text chain.
284
00:10:27,877 --> 00:10:29,546
GINA: That text chain
is a blessing.
285
00:10:29,546 --> 00:10:30,797
I'm so glad you're on it.
286
00:10:30,797 --> 00:10:32,382
Yeah, I read that quote
287
00:10:32,382 --> 00:10:34,175
about resilience
that your cousin sent.
288
00:10:34,175 --> 00:10:36,386
- It was very moving.
- GINA: I'll see you tomorrow.
289
00:10:36,386 --> 00:10:37,429
All right.
290
00:10:37,429 --> 00:10:39,806
♪ (DRAMATIC
OPERA MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
291
00:10:42,225 --> 00:10:43,268
(SIGHS)
292
00:10:47,605 --> 00:10:51,109
(MOANS)
293
00:10:56,281 --> 00:11:01,077
Claustrophobic. The middle seat.
No room. No room!
294
00:11:01,077 --> 00:11:03,955
Ah! I can't breathe.
Middle seat! Can't breathe!
295
00:11:03,955 --> 00:11:06,124
- (WHIMPERING)
- Hey, Jeff. Jeff, Jeff, Jeff.
296
00:11:06,124 --> 00:11:08,543
Get me out of the middle!
Get me out!
297
00:11:08,543 --> 00:11:10,045
- SUSIE GREENE: Jeff, wake up!
- (SCREAMS)
298
00:11:10,045 --> 00:11:12,672
Wake up!
You were having a nightmare.
299
00:11:12,672 --> 00:11:14,174
I think it was about the flight.
300
00:11:14,174 --> 00:11:16,009
- (PANTS)
- You're really bent out of shape
301
00:11:16,009 --> 00:11:17,844
about this flying
to Raleigh, huh?
302
00:11:17,844 --> 00:11:20,430
- I guess I am. I--
- SUSIE: Yeah.
You know what, honey?
303
00:11:20,430 --> 00:11:21,973
If you're so worked up
about this
304
00:11:21,973 --> 00:11:25,310
that you're having nightmares,
it's a sign you should not come.
305
00:11:25,310 --> 00:11:27,604
- You really think so?
- Yeah, I really think so.
306
00:11:27,604 --> 00:11:30,815
Take a deep breath
and get some sleep, okay?
307
00:11:30,815 --> 00:11:33,485
- Yeah.
- I've got a busy day tomorrow.
308
00:11:33,485 --> 00:11:35,737
Busy day with the Caftans.
309
00:11:39,491 --> 00:11:41,659
♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪
310
00:11:41,659 --> 00:11:43,495
GINA: I just saw Stu
at the hospital,
311
00:11:43,495 --> 00:11:45,121
and I'm very worried.
312
00:11:45,121 --> 00:11:48,917
I mean, how could Stu
have a stroke, of all people?
313
00:11:48,917 --> 00:11:51,252
You know Stu.
You know Stu, Larry.
314
00:11:51,252 --> 00:11:54,714
You know, I... (CHUCKLES)
...I really don't know him.
315
00:11:54,714 --> 00:11:57,008
Oh, Larry.
You mean the world to him.
316
00:11:57,008 --> 00:11:58,593
I can't possibly mean anything
to him.
317
00:11:58,593 --> 00:12:00,053
I've never even
had lunch with the guy.
318
00:12:00,053 --> 00:12:02,597
But let me tell you,
I blame Susie Greene
319
00:12:02,597 --> 00:12:04,516
for this situation.
320
00:12:04,516 --> 00:12:06,142
- Susie Greene?
- GINA: Oh, yeah.
321
00:12:06,142 --> 00:12:10,855
The other day, she brought over
this massive tub of foie gras,
322
00:12:10,855 --> 00:12:14,359
but she knows I'm dieting
and watching my weight.
323
00:12:14,359 --> 00:12:16,111
- What a bitch.
- LARRY: She brought it over
324
00:12:16,111 --> 00:12:17,862
just so you'd eat it
and get fat?
325
00:12:17,862 --> 00:12:20,990
Here's the thing.
Stu ate the entire tub himself.
326
00:12:20,990 --> 00:12:24,369
It seems like he was trying
to fill a hole somehow.
327
00:12:24,369 --> 00:12:26,663
Everybody has an Achilles' heel.
328
00:12:26,663 --> 00:12:28,873
An entire tub sounds
like an Achilles' foot.
329
00:12:28,873 --> 00:12:31,042
Well, anyway, let me talk to you
330
00:12:31,042 --> 00:12:33,712
about why I wanted
to meet today.
331
00:12:33,712 --> 00:12:36,548
- Mm-hmm.
- In case Stu doesn't make it,
332
00:12:36,548 --> 00:12:40,051
- he has some requests.
- What do you mean, "requests"?
333
00:12:40,051 --> 00:12:44,556
He wants you to keep
an eye on Olivia.
334
00:12:44,556 --> 00:12:47,183
- Who?
- Our 11-year-old daughter.
335
00:12:48,560 --> 00:12:51,229
(SCOFFS, CHUCKLES)
336
00:12:51,229 --> 00:12:53,565
Me, keep an eye
on your 11-year-old daughter?
337
00:12:53,565 --> 00:12:54,733
You gotta be kidding.
338
00:12:54,733 --> 00:12:56,568
I don't know anything
about children.
339
00:12:56,568 --> 00:13:01,072
Who better to step up
at this time than you, Larry?
340
00:13:01,072 --> 00:13:02,407
Anybody in the world.
Go out in the stre--
341
00:13:02,407 --> 00:13:04,784
A homeless person
would do a better job than me.
342
00:13:04,784 --> 00:13:06,619
I'm telling you what he told me.
343
00:13:06,619 --> 00:13:09,080
Well, this is crazy.
I don't like children.
344
00:13:09,080 --> 00:13:10,915
- I've never spoken to a child...
- Oh!
345
00:13:10,915 --> 00:13:13,293
...without contempt in my voice
in my life!
346
00:13:13,293 --> 00:13:16,338
- So, are you sure?
- It's Stu's wish.
347
00:13:16,338 --> 00:13:20,633
- Is this a financial thing?
- No, it's soccer,
348
00:13:20,633 --> 00:13:22,344
homework, boy stuff.
349
00:13:22,344 --> 00:13:28,350
You know, Olivia this week said
she's now identifying as a cat,
350
00:13:28,350 --> 00:13:31,770
and I'm sure you could really
help her with that, Larry.
351
00:13:31,770 --> 00:13:33,855
Well...
Like what? Buy her a litter box?
352
00:13:33,855 --> 00:13:35,690
I mean,
what am I supposed to do?
353
00:13:35,690 --> 00:13:37,650
I think you underestimate
yourself.
354
00:13:37,650 --> 00:13:39,194
Did anybody else
get any requests?
355
00:13:39,194 --> 00:13:41,613
GINA: Well,
he wants Freddy Funkhouser
356
00:13:41,613 --> 00:13:44,366
to take care
of his antique violin.
357
00:13:44,366 --> 00:13:46,076
- What?
- And to sell it.
358
00:13:46,076 --> 00:13:48,995
It was once played
by Jascha Heifetz
359
00:13:48,995 --> 00:13:51,081
- at Carnegie Hall.
- Are you kidding?
360
00:13:51,081 --> 00:13:53,083
Freddy Funkhouser gets
to sell a violin,
361
00:13:53,083 --> 00:13:54,959
and I get
to take care of Catwoman?
362
00:13:54,959 --> 00:13:57,712
- Why didn't I get the violin?
- Oh, they're early!
363
00:13:57,712 --> 00:14:00,382
Hi, sweetie. Aw.
364
00:14:00,382 --> 00:14:01,966
- How did it go today?
- OLIVIA GROSSBARD: Hi.
365
00:14:01,966 --> 00:14:03,134
It was okay today.
366
00:14:03,134 --> 00:14:05,804
We were a cat,
so lots of scratches,
367
00:14:05,804 --> 00:14:07,305
- but she didn't break the skin.
- GINA: Good.
368
00:14:07,305 --> 00:14:08,807
- Uh-huh.
- Olivia,
369
00:14:08,807 --> 00:14:11,851
- I want you to meet Larry.
- Hey! Yeah. (STAMMERS)
370
00:14:11,851 --> 00:14:13,853
Hello, pussycat.
371
00:14:13,853 --> 00:14:17,982
- Ooh! Hello.
- And this is Katie, our nanny.
372
00:14:17,982 --> 00:14:20,110
- Uh-huh. Hey. Hmm.
- Hi.
373
00:14:20,110 --> 00:14:22,237
- Do you like hockey?
- No.
374
00:14:22,237 --> 00:14:25,198
Do you think Puerto Rico
should become a state?
375
00:14:25,198 --> 00:14:28,201
- Who cares?
- Have you ever tasted a beer?
376
00:14:28,201 --> 00:14:32,163
- Gross. I like your sweatshirt.
- Really? Yes, I like it too.
377
00:14:32,163 --> 00:14:34,290
Yeah, but there's something
on the string.
378
00:14:34,290 --> 00:14:36,167
- Hey! What are you doing?
- (LAUGHS)
379
00:14:36,167 --> 00:14:38,003
What was that?
What'd you do that for?
380
00:14:38,003 --> 00:14:39,295
'Cause cats like string.
381
00:14:39,295 --> 00:14:41,214
It's okay. You'll just wear it
without the string.
382
00:14:41,214 --> 00:14:43,174
You can't wear a sweatshirt
without the string.
383
00:14:43,174 --> 00:14:44,968
You ruined
my sweatshirt, Mittens.
384
00:14:44,968 --> 00:14:47,220
♪ (WHIMSICAL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
385
00:14:49,514 --> 00:14:51,141
♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪
386
00:14:51,141 --> 00:14:53,309
Oh, come on. This is impossible.
387
00:14:53,309 --> 00:14:55,270
- It's impossible.
- Yeah. That shit's hard.
388
00:14:55,270 --> 00:14:57,022
It's like trying to put
toothpaste back in the tube.
389
00:14:57,022 --> 00:14:58,440
But dumb motherfuckers
try to put the shit back
390
00:14:58,440 --> 00:15:00,275
in the same little hole
you squeeze it out of.
391
00:15:00,275 --> 00:15:02,861
- Can't go back in the same hole.
- That's what I'm saying.
392
00:15:02,861 --> 00:15:04,320
You cut the bottom
of that bitch open
393
00:15:04,320 --> 00:15:06,489
and put the shit inside
then reseal the bottom.
394
00:15:06,489 --> 00:15:09,367
- This is harder than toothpaste.
- LEON: Know what you gotta do
with that?
395
00:15:09,367 --> 00:15:11,286
You gotta moisten
that motherfucker.
396
00:15:11,286 --> 00:15:13,204
Yeah. Like trying
to thread a needle.
397
00:15:13,204 --> 00:15:15,123
Yeah, yeah, lick that shit good.
398
00:15:15,123 --> 00:15:16,624
You gotta get
that bitch in that hole.
399
00:15:16,624 --> 00:15:18,543
♪ (QUIRKY MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
400
00:15:18,543 --> 00:15:20,670
- (GASPS)
- Ah!
401
00:15:20,670 --> 00:15:22,672
- Ugh.
- Huh!
402
00:15:22,672 --> 00:15:24,799
- (GROANS)
- Ah. No, no, no, no.
403
00:15:24,799 --> 00:15:26,384
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Wait a second.
404
00:15:26,384 --> 00:15:29,179
I'm just trying to get
this string in the hole here.
405
00:15:29,179 --> 00:15:32,182
Uh, do you have any tricks?
Any housekeeping tricks?
406
00:15:32,182 --> 00:15:34,059
- No?
- No. No housekeeper tricks.
407
00:15:34,059 --> 00:15:35,894
- Sorry. No. No.
- LARRY: You know tricks? Huh.
408
00:15:35,894 --> 00:15:37,020
Also, one more thing.
409
00:15:37,020 --> 00:15:39,647
I noticed when you put
new toilet paper on,
410
00:15:39,647 --> 00:15:40,982
you always put it on
from the bottom,
411
00:15:40,982 --> 00:15:42,567
so I have to go to the bottom.
412
00:15:42,567 --> 00:15:45,236
I like it from the top.
Rolls out a lot easier.
413
00:15:45,236 --> 00:15:46,529
You can rip it off like that.
414
00:15:46,529 --> 00:15:48,239
LEON: Yep, there's people
who do it from the top.
415
00:15:48,239 --> 00:15:49,741
You know, you roll like this.
416
00:15:49,741 --> 00:15:51,451
And people who do it
from the bottom,
417
00:15:51,451 --> 00:15:52,869
you do it like this,
418
00:15:52,869 --> 00:15:55,163
it's almost as if
you're un-wiping your ass.
419
00:15:55,163 --> 00:15:56,581
- LARRY: Yeah.
- Okay.
420
00:15:56,581 --> 00:15:57,749
- Okay.
- DAHLIA: Can I go now?
421
00:15:57,749 --> 00:15:59,584
- Yeah.
- Bye.
422
00:15:59,584 --> 00:16:00,669
LARRY: Okay.
423
00:16:01,836 --> 00:16:03,797
(SCOFFS) This is--
This is unbelievable.
424
00:16:03,797 --> 00:16:05,340
- Yeah.
- LARRY: It's just so awkward.
425
00:16:05,340 --> 00:16:08,176
You know, sometimes
when you have sex with somebody,
426
00:16:08,176 --> 00:16:09,803
you become
a different person afterwards?
427
00:16:09,803 --> 00:16:11,346
- Yeah.
- Well, we didn't have sex.
428
00:16:11,346 --> 00:16:14,140
- She just caught me having sex.
- Yeah. She's uncomfortable,
429
00:16:14,140 --> 00:16:15,433
but now it's making
you uncomfortable.
430
00:16:15,433 --> 00:16:17,686
She's not cleaning.
She's not doing anything.
431
00:16:17,686 --> 00:16:19,187
I'd like to fire her
but I can't.
432
00:16:19,187 --> 00:16:20,563
I got a trial coming up.
433
00:16:20,563 --> 00:16:23,024
It doesn't look good
that I fired the housekeeper
434
00:16:23,024 --> 00:16:24,776
who saw me having cunnilingus.
435
00:16:24,776 --> 00:16:26,945
LEON: Can't get rid of her ass
'cause you got no basis.
436
00:16:26,945 --> 00:16:29,364
Getting caught eating pussy
is not a basis.
437
00:16:29,364 --> 00:16:31,116
So, you fucked.
438
00:16:31,116 --> 00:16:33,243
- Yeah.
- (CELL PHONE CHIMES)
439
00:16:33,243 --> 00:16:37,706
Oh, my God. This text chain.
(CHUCKLES) This text chain.
440
00:16:37,706 --> 00:16:39,374
"Stay strong everybody."
441
00:16:39,374 --> 00:16:42,043
"Remember, after the rain
comes the rainbow.
442
00:16:42,043 --> 00:16:44,337
"Be the reason
someone smiles today."
443
00:16:44,337 --> 00:16:47,090
Oh, fuck you.
(SCOFFS) Ridiculous.
444
00:16:47,090 --> 00:16:50,051
- ♪ (CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
- (SIGHS)
445
00:16:50,051 --> 00:16:53,680
Okay, we go for a walk.
Oh, hi. Jeff's not home.
446
00:16:53,680 --> 00:16:55,015
- Huh?
- He just ran out for--
447
00:16:55,015 --> 00:16:56,725
He'll be back in,
like, eh, ten minutes.
448
00:16:56,725 --> 00:16:57,976
(CHUCKLES) What the hell's this?
449
00:16:57,976 --> 00:16:59,894
It's a coyote vest.
450
00:16:59,894 --> 00:17:01,438
They're all over
the fucking neighborhood.
451
00:17:01,438 --> 00:17:03,106
I gotta protect him.
Some people care
452
00:17:03,106 --> 00:17:04,983
if he gets eaten
by a coyote, Larry.
453
00:17:04,983 --> 00:17:07,610
By the way, I just had lunch
with Gina Grossbard.
454
00:17:07,610 --> 00:17:09,029
Oy. That farbissina punim.
455
00:17:09,029 --> 00:17:11,823
She blames you for Stu's stroke.
456
00:17:11,823 --> 00:17:14,200
She thinks-- What, 'cause
I brought over the foie gras?
457
00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:16,369
- Yeah.
- She is so transparent.
458
00:17:16,369 --> 00:17:18,079
Every time she comes here, Larr,
459
00:17:18,079 --> 00:17:21,249
she brings something
from that new French patisserie.
460
00:17:21,249 --> 00:17:23,001
- Eclairs and Napole--
- Yeah.
461
00:17:23,001 --> 00:17:24,377
She's trying to get me fat.
462
00:17:24,377 --> 00:17:27,255
- She wants you to be fat?
- Yes, she does. So I retaliated.
463
00:17:27,255 --> 00:17:29,382
- You retaliated?
- Yeah. Because she's jealous
464
00:17:29,382 --> 00:17:31,092
- that I'm thinner than her...
- Really?
465
00:17:31,092 --> 00:17:32,844
...and I have more style
than her.
466
00:17:32,844 --> 00:17:34,971
- You know, he ate the whole tub.
That night, had a stroke.
- That's his problem.
467
00:17:34,971 --> 00:17:36,431
Because he's a fucking pig.
468
00:17:36,431 --> 00:17:38,183
- It's not my problem.
- Really?
469
00:17:38,183 --> 00:17:40,185
Oh, by the way,
you can play golf
470
00:17:40,185 --> 00:17:41,519
with your boyfriend
this weekend.
471
00:17:41,519 --> 00:17:43,313
Why? I thought he was going
to North Carolina.
472
00:17:43,313 --> 00:17:45,482
He is not coming with me.
I can't have it.
473
00:17:45,482 --> 00:17:47,359
He had a dream last night,
Larry.
474
00:17:47,359 --> 00:17:49,235
- A nightmare about the trip.
- What?
475
00:17:49,235 --> 00:17:51,654
And I thought, "If he's having
this much anxiety
476
00:17:51,654 --> 00:17:53,907
over that flight,
better he should stay home."
477
00:17:53,907 --> 00:17:56,534
- I don't need him
having a stroke. I don't--
- He had a dream?
478
00:17:56,534 --> 00:17:59,537
- Yeah, he had a dream, and--
- Just a-- a nightmare?
479
00:17:59,537 --> 00:18:01,539
He was thrashing around.
It's something like that.
480
00:18:01,539 --> 00:18:04,834
- Oh, the poor guy.
- I believe in respecting
the unconscious.
481
00:18:04,834 --> 00:18:07,587
Yeah, well, that's just
a surprising turn of events.
482
00:18:07,587 --> 00:18:10,882
- Good for you. Oh.
- Yeah. We're going for a walk.
483
00:18:10,882 --> 00:18:13,009
- Yes.
- Is your outfit anti-coyote?
484
00:18:13,009 --> 00:18:15,345
Very funny, Larry.
Go fuck yourself.
485
00:18:15,345 --> 00:18:17,180
You don't know anything
about fashion.
486
00:18:17,180 --> 00:18:19,224
- Let's go, buddy. (KISSES)
- (DOG BARKS)
487
00:18:19,224 --> 00:18:21,267
♪ (UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
488
00:18:24,104 --> 00:18:26,773
Oh, hey.
Is this Stu Grossbard's room?
489
00:18:26,773 --> 00:18:28,650
- Yes, it is.
- How's he doing?
490
00:18:28,650 --> 00:18:29,693
It's too early to tell.
491
00:18:29,693 --> 00:18:31,986
- Can I see him?
- Yes, but don't stay long.
492
00:18:31,986 --> 00:18:33,863
- He needs his rest.
- Okay.
493
00:18:35,198 --> 00:18:37,534
- (EKG MONITOR BEEPING)
- (STU GROSSBARD PANTING)
494
00:18:39,536 --> 00:18:41,454
Stu. Hey.
495
00:18:41,454 --> 00:18:44,582
- Larr-- Larry.
- Hey, hey! Stuey!
496
00:18:44,582 --> 00:18:46,209
(GRUNTS) Oh, jeez.
497
00:18:46,209 --> 00:18:49,004
Look at you. What a man
will do for attention, huh?
498
00:18:49,004 --> 00:18:50,338
(CHUCKLES)
499
00:18:50,338 --> 00:18:52,549
- Did you talk to Gina?
- LARRY: I did talk to Gina.
500
00:18:52,549 --> 00:18:55,010
She invited me to lunch,
and, uh, I paid,
501
00:18:55,010 --> 00:18:57,095
which is a little odd
because she invited me.
502
00:18:57,095 --> 00:18:59,180
I'm the invitee.
She's the inviter.
503
00:18:59,180 --> 00:19:01,057
Usually, the inviter pays.
504
00:19:01,057 --> 00:19:02,767
I kind of waited.
I gave her some time,
505
00:19:02,767 --> 00:19:04,936
but it was not forthcoming,
and, you know,
506
00:19:04,936 --> 00:19:06,229
I don't wanna make
a big deal of it.
507
00:19:06,229 --> 00:19:09,357
I don't care, really.
It means nothing to me,
508
00:19:09,357 --> 00:19:11,484
but it's a matter
of common courtesy.
509
00:19:11,484 --> 00:19:12,736
- (SIGHS)
- You would think the inviter
510
00:19:12,736 --> 00:19:15,238
should be the one picking it up.
I-- Listen, again,
511
00:19:15,238 --> 00:19:16,740
I didn't care.
It doesn't matter to me.
512
00:19:16,740 --> 00:19:19,200
But she did bring up
something at the lunch
513
00:19:19,200 --> 00:19:20,869
that I wanted to call
to your attention,
514
00:19:20,869 --> 00:19:23,288
which is in the event that...
515
00:19:23,288 --> 00:19:25,957
you know, God forbid,
the worst transpires...
516
00:19:25,957 --> 00:19:30,086
- (GROANS)
- ...do I have this right,
that you want me to keep an...
517
00:19:30,086 --> 00:19:32,839
"an eye"
on your 11-year-old daughter?
518
00:19:32,839 --> 00:19:33,882
Yes, Larry.
519
00:19:33,882 --> 00:19:35,425
And, you know, I met
your daughter at the lunch,
520
00:19:35,425 --> 00:19:38,720
and she pulled the string
on my sweatshirt,
521
00:19:38,720 --> 00:19:41,431
and it was all I could do
to restrain myself from yelling,
522
00:19:41,431 --> 00:19:42,682
"You fuck!"
523
00:19:42,682 --> 00:19:44,434
- That's what I wanted
to say to your daughter.
- Uh, right.
524
00:19:44,434 --> 00:19:46,311
She pulled the string out.
The sweatshirt's ruined.
525
00:19:46,311 --> 00:19:49,064
She's curious.
You're passionate.
526
00:19:49,064 --> 00:19:51,983
It's all right.
It's a good combination.
527
00:19:51,983 --> 00:19:53,234
I'm not being modest
528
00:19:53,234 --> 00:19:55,153
when I tell you
that I don't really think
529
00:19:55,153 --> 00:19:56,905
I'm the right person
for this job.
530
00:19:56,905 --> 00:19:59,616
- You are, Larry. You are.
- LARRY: You know who would be
perfect for this?
531
00:19:59,616 --> 00:20:01,576
Freddy Funkhouser.
532
00:20:01,576 --> 00:20:02,869
- No.
- Oh, yes.
533
00:20:02,869 --> 00:20:06,122
Freddy Funkhouser,
who loves prepubescent girls.
534
00:20:06,122 --> 00:20:07,415
And I mean that in a good way.
535
00:20:07,415 --> 00:20:09,417
He's very excited
to be around them.
536
00:20:09,417 --> 00:20:11,503
And, of course, again,
I mean that in a good way.
537
00:20:11,503 --> 00:20:13,338
This has got Freddy written
all over it.
538
00:20:13,338 --> 00:20:14,714
Freddy's the violin man.
539
00:20:14,714 --> 00:20:16,341
I don't know why
I'm not the violin man.
540
00:20:16,341 --> 00:20:18,218
I grew up taking violin lessons.
541
00:20:18,218 --> 00:20:20,428
Larry, I just know
542
00:20:20,428 --> 00:20:23,598
that you're the right man
for the job.
543
00:20:23,598 --> 00:20:26,267
You must have me confused
with a normal person.
544
00:20:26,267 --> 00:20:29,646
You are the person for Olivia.
You understand?
545
00:20:29,646 --> 00:20:32,357
Okay, Stu. I...
546
00:20:32,357 --> 00:20:33,983
I respect your decision.
547
00:20:34,776 --> 00:20:36,820
STU: Okay. (SIGHS)
548
00:20:36,820 --> 00:20:39,656
That puts me at ease. (SIGHS)
549
00:20:43,076 --> 00:20:45,161
(EXHALES, EXCLAIMS)
550
00:20:45,161 --> 00:20:46,663
You're carrying a flask now?
551
00:20:46,663 --> 00:20:48,456
Eh, you know,
I take a couple of nips.
552
00:20:48,456 --> 00:20:50,542
I take a nip here,
a nip there, you know.
553
00:20:50,542 --> 00:20:52,502
I nip away at it,
and then, hopefully,
554
00:20:52,502 --> 00:20:53,753
I won't have
to drink again tonight.
555
00:20:53,753 --> 00:20:56,214
But I feel good. I like it.
So what? You know.
556
00:20:56,214 --> 00:20:58,008
(BURPS) Excuse me.
557
00:20:58,008 --> 00:21:00,301
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
558
00:21:00,301 --> 00:21:02,387
(COUGHS, CHUCKLES)
Oh, Jesus Christ.
559
00:21:02,387 --> 00:21:04,222
Will you look at the tuchus
on this one?
560
00:21:04,222 --> 00:21:06,099
Hey, you know what?
Is she coming in here?
561
00:21:06,099 --> 00:21:07,559
She giving you sponge baths,
this one? Huh?
562
00:21:07,559 --> 00:21:09,394
Yeah,
she takes care of me, Larry.
563
00:21:09,394 --> 00:21:11,146
I'm not even sure
if she's wearing a bra.
564
00:21:11,146 --> 00:21:13,773
- Am I right, Stu?
- Um...
565
00:21:15,191 --> 00:21:16,526
(LARRY EXHALES)
566
00:21:17,235 --> 00:21:18,486
- STU: Maybe you're--
- Oh, boy.
567
00:21:18,486 --> 00:21:20,238
Maybe you're right, Larr.
568
00:21:20,238 --> 00:21:22,407
- Freddy's the right person...
- (LARRY SCOFFS)
569
00:21:22,407 --> 00:21:23,908
- ...for Olivia.
- (CHUCKLES) Yeah.
570
00:21:23,908 --> 00:21:26,494
And you're-- you're
the right person for the violin.
571
00:21:26,494 --> 00:21:27,746
So, yeah, yeah,
you wanna flop us?
572
00:21:27,746 --> 00:21:29,748
- Yes, I'm gonna flop you, Larry.
- LARRY: Okay.
573
00:21:30,373 --> 00:21:31,624
I got that violin covered.
574
00:21:31,624 --> 00:21:34,294
The violin
is the least of your worries.
575
00:21:34,294 --> 00:21:35,962
You're my friend, Larry.
576
00:21:35,962 --> 00:21:39,466
Good decision, Stu. I gotta run.
I got a violin to sell.
577
00:21:39,466 --> 00:21:41,843
♪ (QUIRKY MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
578
00:21:41,843 --> 00:21:43,428
(WHISPERS INDISTINCTLY)
579
00:21:54,272 --> 00:21:56,024
- (CLEARS THROAT)
- ♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪
580
00:21:57,942 --> 00:22:00,320
- Hello.
- Hello.
581
00:22:00,320 --> 00:22:01,863
LARRY: Just got out
of the shower
582
00:22:01,863 --> 00:22:04,115
and, uh... (CHUCKLES)
583
00:22:04,949 --> 00:22:06,493
...there are no towels.
584
00:22:06,493 --> 00:22:08,953
It's because I can't deal
with the towels right now.
585
00:22:09,371 --> 00:22:10,580
And why is that?
586
00:22:10,580 --> 00:22:13,375
Because I was holding
the towels...
587
00:22:14,459 --> 00:22:17,128
when you and her were...
588
00:22:18,338 --> 00:22:19,464
- (SIGHS)
- Ah.
589
00:22:19,464 --> 00:22:22,133
- They remind me of the trauma.
- Oh. The trauma?
590
00:22:22,133 --> 00:22:23,218
Yeah, the trauma.
591
00:22:23,218 --> 00:22:25,303
- I'll tell you what.
- What?
592
00:22:25,303 --> 00:22:27,430
(CHUCKLES) Why don't I get
some new towels?
593
00:22:28,139 --> 00:22:29,474
I think I couldn't.
594
00:22:29,474 --> 00:22:31,851
Like, any--
any sort of towels would be--
595
00:22:31,851 --> 00:22:33,728
- You can't even go near towels?
- No, no, I can't.
596
00:22:33,728 --> 00:22:35,939
So, cleaning any towels
in this house
597
00:22:35,939 --> 00:22:37,899
- is traumatic?
- Yeah.
598
00:22:37,899 --> 00:22:39,943
How 'bout when you take
a shower at home and, uh,
599
00:22:39,943 --> 00:22:42,487
- you use your towels?
- Well, those are my towels.
600
00:22:42,487 --> 00:22:43,863
- Oh, so it's just my towels?
- Yeah.
601
00:22:43,863 --> 00:22:46,658
And even the new towels would
be a reminder of the trauma?
602
00:22:46,658 --> 00:22:50,328
But I also noticed that
my clothing hasn't been washed.
603
00:22:50,328 --> 00:22:52,372
That's also a trauma?
604
00:22:52,372 --> 00:22:53,832
You don't believe me
I have a trauma?
605
00:22:53,832 --> 00:22:56,251
Can we get over the trauma
by tomorrow?
606
00:22:56,251 --> 00:22:59,004
I do my best. (SLURPS)
607
00:22:59,004 --> 00:23:02,007
♪ (QUIRKY MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
608
00:23:06,594 --> 00:23:08,388
(LEON SCOFFS)
Look at all this shit.
609
00:23:08,388 --> 00:23:10,515
- (SIGHS)
- This fucking mess.
610
00:23:10,515 --> 00:23:12,767
LARRY: Dahlia can't work
because of the trauma.
611
00:23:12,767 --> 00:23:14,728
Wow. This trauma
is out of control right now.
612
00:23:14,728 --> 00:23:16,688
Yeah. Look at this. No towels.
613
00:23:16,688 --> 00:23:18,440
- I'm wet.
- I took a shower this morning.
614
00:23:18,440 --> 00:23:19,774
I had to dry off
with paper towels.
615
00:23:19,774 --> 00:23:21,443
- This is fucking insane.
- She won't do anything.
616
00:23:21,443 --> 00:23:22,527
She's taking advantage
617
00:23:22,527 --> 00:23:23,695
of the whole situation
right now.
618
00:23:23,695 --> 00:23:26,364
Oh, yes. Completely. Completely.
619
00:23:26,364 --> 00:23:27,615
LEON: I get she saw you
eating pussy,
620
00:23:27,615 --> 00:23:29,951
but it should not affect
your fucking work.
621
00:23:29,951 --> 00:23:32,412
Yeah. I caught my aunt giving
my Uncle Moishe a--
622
00:23:32,412 --> 00:23:34,372
a blowjob
in the back of a Pontiac,
623
00:23:34,372 --> 00:23:35,707
but if they asked me
to go to the movies,
624
00:23:35,707 --> 00:23:37,250
- I just hopped in the car.
- Fuck yeah, you did.
625
00:23:37,250 --> 00:23:38,877
- Same back seat!
- Yeah, same back seat.
626
00:23:38,877 --> 00:23:41,838
You know, I can still remember
those gabardine slacks unzipped!
627
00:23:41,838 --> 00:23:43,506
Yeah. You might even
have got a lollipop that day,
628
00:23:43,506 --> 00:23:44,632
and it still didn't affect you.
629
00:23:44,632 --> 00:23:45,925
Know what I'm saying?
It still didn't--
630
00:23:45,925 --> 00:23:47,677
- Still didn't affect me.
- It still didn't fuck with you.
631
00:23:47,677 --> 00:23:49,637
I did have a crush
on my aunt, though, after that.
632
00:23:49,637 --> 00:23:51,222
LEON: I don't get it, man.
Trauma did that?
633
00:23:51,222 --> 00:23:52,849
Maybe it's some kind
of religious thing.
634
00:23:52,849 --> 00:23:54,517
Is there any mention
of cunnilingus in the Bible?
635
00:23:54,517 --> 00:23:55,727
I don't think
it's in the Old Testament.
636
00:23:55,727 --> 00:23:57,437
Hmm. I don't think
that shit was invented yet.
637
00:23:57,437 --> 00:23:59,731
- That shit didn't start
till the early 1900s, at least.
- No, I don't think so.
638
00:23:59,731 --> 00:24:00,982
Columbus got it
from the Indians,
639
00:24:00,982 --> 00:24:03,193
brought it back
to Spain with grapefruit.
640
00:24:03,193 --> 00:24:04,319
Somebody had to be the first.
641
00:24:04,319 --> 00:24:06,196
There was a cunnilingus pioneer
out there.
642
00:24:06,196 --> 00:24:07,238
We don't know who it was.
643
00:24:07,238 --> 00:24:08,573
They should get some credit
for that.
644
00:24:08,573 --> 00:24:10,325
Put that motherfucker on--
on the Mount Rushmore
645
00:24:10,325 --> 00:24:11,576
of-- of pussy eaters.
646
00:24:11,576 --> 00:24:13,411
They all got their tongue out
and shit. You know what I mean?
647
00:24:13,411 --> 00:24:14,746
- (DOORBELL RINGS)
- That's how the fuck you do it.
648
00:24:14,746 --> 00:24:16,289
- Honor these motherfuckers,
right?
- I'll get it.
649
00:24:16,289 --> 00:24:17,707
Somebody had to start it.
650
00:24:20,043 --> 00:24:21,378
Nah, fuck that.
651
00:24:21,378 --> 00:24:23,421
- LARRY: Who is it?
- FREDDY: It's Freddy!
652
00:24:23,421 --> 00:24:24,798
(GROANS, MUMBLES)
653
00:24:26,383 --> 00:24:27,759
Hey! There's my guy.
654
00:24:27,759 --> 00:24:29,636
- Okay if I come in?
- Uh... (HESITATES) Yeah.
655
00:24:29,636 --> 00:24:31,429
FREDDY: Great to see you,
old friend.
656
00:24:31,429 --> 00:24:34,557
Boy, it does my heart good
to see an honest face.
657
00:24:34,557 --> 00:24:36,434
I think it comes down
to just loyalty
658
00:24:36,434 --> 00:24:39,354
and someone who's genuine,
who you can count on.
659
00:24:39,354 --> 00:24:40,730
Because that's what
makes a friend.
660
00:24:40,730 --> 00:24:42,065
Anyway, anything on your mind?
661
00:24:42,065 --> 00:24:44,359
Anything you wanna tell a friend
to his face?
662
00:24:44,359 --> 00:24:45,985
- No. I don't...
- No?
663
00:24:45,985 --> 00:24:47,195
Mm.
664
00:24:47,195 --> 00:24:49,906
I gave you a chance to address
the fact that you fucked me.
665
00:24:50,824 --> 00:24:52,534
Yeah.
You took me off the violin,
666
00:24:52,534 --> 00:24:53,952
and you shoved the kid
down my throat,
667
00:24:53,952 --> 00:24:56,579
- and you fucked me, L.D.
- I couldn't do it.
668
00:24:56,579 --> 00:24:57,997
You know what the worst thing
about this whole thing is?
669
00:24:57,997 --> 00:25:00,125
Is that you did it
with my own flask.
670
00:25:00,125 --> 00:25:01,084
You took something elegant,
671
00:25:01,084 --> 00:25:04,170
something classy
and sophisticated like my flask,
672
00:25:04,170 --> 00:25:06,464
and you shoved it up my ass,
and you reamed me with it.
673
00:25:06,464 --> 00:25:08,550
- It was a good idea, though.
- FREDDY: What you did
is terrible.
674
00:25:08,550 --> 00:25:09,718
But it was a good idea.
675
00:25:09,718 --> 00:25:12,262
This is a first-degree,
premeditated fucking.
676
00:25:12,262 --> 00:25:13,513
You know what makes it
even worse?
677
00:25:13,513 --> 00:25:15,890
Is you don't have any remorse.
You're a sociopath.
678
00:25:15,890 --> 00:25:18,643
You fucked me in cold blood,
and you're a monster.
679
00:25:18,643 --> 00:25:20,478
And now I have
to accept the fact
680
00:25:20,478 --> 00:25:22,397
that you're wired
like a fucking lunatic.
681
00:25:22,397 --> 00:25:24,399
I can't take care of kids!
I hate kids!
682
00:25:24,399 --> 00:25:26,818
I'd rather have roaches
in my bathtub as pets
683
00:25:26,818 --> 00:25:29,362
- than take care of a kid!
- And I'm fucking Mary Poppins?
684
00:25:29,362 --> 00:25:31,156
You're a very affable
and genial fella!
685
00:25:31,156 --> 00:25:32,824
You could do a much better job
than I can!
686
00:25:32,824 --> 00:25:34,159
- You have a knack!
- What? No!
687
00:25:34,159 --> 00:25:35,702
My humor's way
too sophisticated for a child!
688
00:25:35,702 --> 00:25:37,370
Yes, you are.
You always take time for people!
689
00:25:37,370 --> 00:25:39,831
- No, I don't! I make no time!
- You're completely courteous!
690
00:25:39,831 --> 00:25:41,332
I can't even believe
the way people talk
691
00:25:41,332 --> 00:25:42,667
about you behind your back!
692
00:25:42,667 --> 00:25:43,793
-"Oh, that Freddy Funkhouser!"
- FREDDY: You know what?
693
00:25:43,793 --> 00:25:45,337
"He's the nicest guy
I've ever met!"
694
00:25:45,337 --> 00:25:46,463
Oh, my God! I'm the nicest guy?
695
00:25:46,463 --> 00:25:47,881
People always say
how lovely you are!
696
00:25:47,881 --> 00:25:49,507
- Nobody says that!
Nobody says that!
-"Oh, he's so funny!
697
00:25:49,507 --> 00:25:50,759
Larry brightens the party!"
698
00:25:50,759 --> 00:25:52,260
Nobody's said a decent word
about me my entire life!
699
00:25:52,260 --> 00:25:53,511
What, are you crazy?
People love you!
700
00:25:53,511 --> 00:25:54,721
I don't even say
decent words about me!
701
00:25:54,721 --> 00:25:55,889
Yes, I do!
I say it all the time!
702
00:25:55,889 --> 00:25:57,349
I say,
"He's honest, he's loyal!"
703
00:25:57,349 --> 00:25:58,808
I won't say it anymore!
704
00:26:00,018 --> 00:26:01,478
It was a terrible thing
that you did.
705
00:26:01,478 --> 00:26:04,105
My one regret
is that I had to use your flask.
706
00:26:04,105 --> 00:26:05,023
FREDDY: Oh, no, no, no, no.
707
00:26:05,023 --> 00:26:07,317
That may be your first regret,
but that's--
708
00:26:07,317 --> 00:26:09,486
that's not gonna be
your only regret.
709
00:26:09,486 --> 00:26:11,029
There's gonna be
a series of regrets,
710
00:26:11,029 --> 00:26:14,032
because if you think
I'm gonna take a nap
711
00:26:14,032 --> 00:26:17,118
while you fuck me, you're crazy.
I'm awake.
712
00:26:17,118 --> 00:26:19,037
- This thing's only just begun.
- Oh, really?
713
00:26:19,037 --> 00:26:21,373
And I'm about to roll over
and do some fucking myself.
714
00:26:21,373 --> 00:26:22,499
That guy could be dead
any second.
715
00:26:22,499 --> 00:26:23,625
You're getting fucked
pretty soon.
716
00:26:23,625 --> 00:26:24,793
I don't know what you think
you're gonna do.
717
00:26:24,793 --> 00:26:26,169
FREDDY: I'm gonna roll over
and fuck you.
718
00:26:26,169 --> 00:26:28,713
LARRY: That guy thinks
I'm an alcoholic!
719
00:26:28,713 --> 00:26:30,924
Freddy? What are you gonna do?
720
00:26:31,675 --> 00:26:32,967
(CELL PHONE CHIMES)
721
00:26:32,967 --> 00:26:34,386
♪ (WHIMSICAL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
722
00:26:34,386 --> 00:26:36,179
LARRY: Oh, for God's sake.
723
00:26:36,971 --> 00:26:41,726
Ah, this chain! This chain!
724
00:26:43,561 --> 00:26:45,063
♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪
725
00:26:45,063 --> 00:26:46,314
Stu, you all right?
726
00:26:47,565 --> 00:26:49,317
I came full throttle
from Cabazon,
727
00:26:49,317 --> 00:26:50,527
from the outlet store.
728
00:26:50,527 --> 00:26:51,945
- I'm glad to be with you.
- My friend, Freddy.
729
00:26:51,945 --> 00:26:53,738
Can I cheer you up
with some pretty good news?
730
00:26:53,738 --> 00:26:56,116
I think I got a couple leads
on the violin.
731
00:26:56,116 --> 00:26:57,409
Uh, you talked to Gina?
732
00:26:57,409 --> 00:26:58,910
No, no,
I'm getting a bidding war going.
733
00:26:58,910 --> 00:27:01,287
I can't do it, Freddy.
I gotta switch it up.
734
00:27:01,287 --> 00:27:04,374
You gotta take Olivia.
Larry's gonna sell the violin.
735
00:27:04,374 --> 00:27:06,292
You wanna have a nest egg
for Olivia,
736
00:27:06,292 --> 00:27:08,128
you need me moving that violin.
737
00:27:08,128 --> 00:27:10,964
- And Larry's great with kids.
- I don't know about that.
738
00:27:10,964 --> 00:27:12,966
He's super comfortable
with really young girls.
739
00:27:12,966 --> 00:27:15,260
Not in a bad way, but nice,
like laughing and joking.
740
00:27:15,260 --> 00:27:16,428
He's like a porcupine.
741
00:27:16,428 --> 00:27:17,929
He puts those things out
and is prickly
742
00:27:17,929 --> 00:27:19,431
'cause he wants
to keep people away,
743
00:27:19,431 --> 00:27:20,932
but he puts 'em down
for the kids,
744
00:27:20,932 --> 00:27:23,852
and he brings those kids in,
he gives 'em a nice, snug hug.
745
00:27:23,852 --> 00:27:26,062
He holds on to 'em super tight.
Not in a bad way.
746
00:27:26,062 --> 00:27:28,106
They love to cuddle with him
because he smells good,
747
00:27:28,106 --> 00:27:30,275
and he's always got
a clever line he whispers.
748
00:27:30,275 --> 00:27:31,693
He's playful. The girls love it.
749
00:27:31,693 --> 00:27:32,944
They sit and laugh,
and, you know,
750
00:27:32,944 --> 00:27:34,529
it's a little push,
a little pull, and...
751
00:27:34,529 --> 00:27:36,114
Not in a bad way,
but they connect.
752
00:27:36,114 --> 00:27:38,116
I appreciate everything
you're saying.
753
00:27:38,116 --> 00:27:40,326
If I was gonna pick someone,
I'd pick Larry David.
754
00:27:40,326 --> 00:27:41,619
I made up my mind.
755
00:27:41,619 --> 00:27:43,288
I think you're missing
the big picture here.
756
00:27:43,288 --> 00:27:45,874
Larry is selling the violin,
757
00:27:45,874 --> 00:27:48,835
and you are keeping an eye
on Olivia.
758
00:27:48,835 --> 00:27:51,671
And that's my final word,
Freddy.
759
00:27:51,671 --> 00:27:54,215
If that's what you want,
then I'll honor that.
760
00:27:54,215 --> 00:27:56,885
- It is.
- (YAWNS)
761
00:27:56,885 --> 00:28:00,055
I'm sorry. I'm exhausted.
I've had the, uh, sun in my eyes
762
00:28:00,055 --> 00:28:01,306
since I've been driving
from the outlets.
763
00:28:01,306 --> 00:28:03,224
- You mind if I take a seat?
- No. Go ahead, Freddy.
764
00:28:03,224 --> 00:28:05,685
- (FREDDY SIGHS) It just hit me.
- I want you to stick around.
765
00:28:05,685 --> 00:28:06,895
(YAWNING) I'm so tired.
766
00:28:06,895 --> 00:28:09,856
I think I'm about
to fall asleep on my feet.
767
00:28:09,856 --> 00:28:11,066
You mind if I rest my eyes?
768
00:28:11,066 --> 00:28:14,235
No. I think I'm gonna go
to sleep too, Freddy.
769
00:28:14,235 --> 00:28:17,989
- ♪ (SOFT MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
- (SNORES)
770
00:28:20,575 --> 00:28:22,535
(SNORES)
771
00:28:22,535 --> 00:28:24,454
You don't need
to finish high school.
772
00:28:25,330 --> 00:28:26,539
You need to pay your dues
773
00:28:26,539 --> 00:28:28,541
at the mattress store
in Temecula.
774
00:28:28,541 --> 00:28:30,502
♪ (DRAMATIC OPERA
MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
775
00:28:30,502 --> 00:28:31,670
FREDDY: You want a book?
776
00:28:31,670 --> 00:28:34,005
Next thing is
you're gonna be wanting socks.
777
00:28:34,005 --> 00:28:38,176
And take off that skirt,
you look like a whore. (INHALES)
778
00:28:38,176 --> 00:28:39,678
I said take it off!
779
00:28:39,678 --> 00:28:44,182
(SNORES) It's not hard
to make friends.
780
00:28:44,182 --> 00:28:47,769
It's just nobody likes you.
(SNORES)
781
00:28:47,769 --> 00:28:49,896
It's a pocketknife.
782
00:28:49,896 --> 00:28:52,399
You're supposed
to cut yourself sometimes.
783
00:28:52,941 --> 00:28:54,401
That's how you learn.
784
00:28:55,527 --> 00:28:56,778
(SNORING)
785
00:28:56,778 --> 00:28:58,863
You shit in the bucket,
you clean the bucket.
786
00:28:58,863 --> 00:29:00,323
Those are the house rules.
787
00:29:01,116 --> 00:29:03,034
Who cares
if it's your birthday?
788
00:29:03,034 --> 00:29:06,121
We go to cockfights.
That's what this family does.
789
00:29:06,121 --> 00:29:10,417
- It's tradition. (SNORES)
- Freddy.
790
00:29:10,417 --> 00:29:12,919
You'll come out of the basement
when I'm good and ready.
791
00:29:12,919 --> 00:29:15,422
- Freddy.
- Hey, you're fat.
792
00:29:16,047 --> 00:29:17,507
- You're fat!
- Freddy!
793
00:29:17,507 --> 00:29:19,426
- (GROANS)
- STU: Freddy.
794
00:29:19,426 --> 00:29:21,219
Hey. Ah. What's going on?
795
00:29:21,219 --> 00:29:24,014
So sorry.
I was having the craziest dream.
796
00:29:24,014 --> 00:29:25,265
- (GROANS)
- STU: Yeah, I know.
797
00:29:25,265 --> 00:29:27,517
- FREDDY: I was exhausted.
- I've changed my mind.
798
00:29:27,517 --> 00:29:29,519
- You're back on the violin.
- ♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪
799
00:29:29,519 --> 00:29:31,146
- You're flopping?
- I'm flopping.
800
00:29:31,146 --> 00:29:33,690
All right, well,
that's what you want,
801
00:29:33,690 --> 00:29:35,400
that's what it is.
I'll be sure to let Larry know.
802
00:29:35,400 --> 00:29:37,610
I'd love to stay,
but I got a Zoom in Vacaville
803
00:29:37,610 --> 00:29:38,737
with one
of my mattress shops, okay?
804
00:29:38,737 --> 00:29:39,946
You're the best, Freddy.
805
00:29:39,946 --> 00:29:41,448
And, um,
don't worry about that violin.
806
00:29:41,448 --> 00:29:43,408
- I'm moving it.
- Bye.
807
00:29:43,408 --> 00:29:47,912
- ♪ (WHIMSICAL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
- (GROANS) Very busy tongue.
808
00:29:49,080 --> 00:29:50,081
Ah!
809
00:29:50,749 --> 00:29:53,877
(SPEAKS SPANISH, RETCHES)
810
00:29:55,920 --> 00:29:57,297
(IN ENGLISH) Awful.
811
00:29:57,797 --> 00:29:59,591
Head and legs.
812
00:29:59,591 --> 00:30:03,470
Bald head, moving up and down.
813
00:30:03,470 --> 00:30:05,930
- (MOANS)
- (MIMICS MOANING)
814
00:30:05,930 --> 00:30:07,724
- (GASPS)
- (LARRY MIMICS GASPING)
815
00:30:07,724 --> 00:30:09,434
(YAWNING)
I must have fallen asleep.
816
00:30:09,434 --> 00:30:11,603
- Oh, what happened?
- I was having a nightmare.
817
00:30:11,603 --> 00:30:14,981
Oh, yeah, sounds like it.
You poor thing. Are you okay?
818
00:30:14,981 --> 00:30:17,067
Maybe bec--
because of the trauma.
819
00:30:17,067 --> 00:30:19,152
Okay. Let me tell you something.
820
00:30:19,152 --> 00:30:21,571
You're using the dream scheme
on the wrong guy.
821
00:30:21,571 --> 00:30:22,781
I invented it.
822
00:30:22,781 --> 00:30:24,115
I can't forget what I saw.
823
00:30:24,115 --> 00:30:26,409
This is over.
I don't wanna fire anybody,
824
00:30:26,409 --> 00:30:27,827
but I will fire,
825
00:30:27,827 --> 00:30:29,287
and I'll hate myself
for doing it.
826
00:30:29,287 --> 00:30:31,790
But if you don't
come in tomorrow and work,
827
00:30:31,790 --> 00:30:33,166
I'm gonna do it. Okay?
828
00:30:33,166 --> 00:30:34,834
And take your feet
off the couch.
829
00:30:34,834 --> 00:30:36,503
- ♪ (QUIRKY MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
- LARRY: Hey, Leon!
830
00:30:36,503 --> 00:30:38,254
I'm gonna go get that violin!
831
00:30:42,217 --> 00:30:44,302
- Take care.
- ♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪
832
00:30:47,472 --> 00:30:48,973
- Larry.
- Yeah.
833
00:30:48,973 --> 00:30:51,142
Waylan Grossbard.
834
00:30:51,142 --> 00:30:53,103
- Do I know you?
- I'm Stu's cousin
835
00:30:53,103 --> 00:30:54,896
from the family text chain.
836
00:30:54,896 --> 00:30:57,107
Oh. Oh, yeah, the text chain.
837
00:30:57,107 --> 00:30:58,733
WAYLAN GROSSBARD: Yeah,
we love that you're on there.
838
00:30:58,733 --> 00:31:02,487
- I noticed you haven't
really been very active on it.
- Yeah.
839
00:31:02,487 --> 00:31:03,613
- No.
- Barely replying
840
00:31:03,613 --> 00:31:06,157
- at all, actually.
- Yeah, uh...
841
00:31:06,157 --> 00:31:08,993
Well, we're noticing it's really
been helpful for everybody,
842
00:31:08,993 --> 00:31:10,912
- keeping us in the loop...
- Has it? Is it? Really? Is it?
843
00:31:10,912 --> 00:31:12,664
...and sort of positive spirits.
844
00:31:12,664 --> 00:31:13,998
- Is it helpful?
- Yeah.
845
00:31:13,998 --> 00:31:16,001
- Yeah, you think so?
- Yeah. I don't know if you saw.
846
00:31:16,001 --> 00:31:17,627
My niece sent a great photo
847
00:31:17,627 --> 00:31:19,754
- of Stu and her by the lake.
- Oh, yeah.
848
00:31:19,754 --> 00:31:22,590
Uh-huh, yeah.
That was really, uh...
849
00:31:23,049 --> 00:31:24,592
- cute.
- Cute.
850
00:31:24,592 --> 00:31:26,052
Yeah.
851
00:31:26,052 --> 00:31:28,179
You think you're too good
for the chain?
852
00:31:28,179 --> 00:31:31,307
You know what? Waylan?
Is that your name?
853
00:31:31,307 --> 00:31:33,143
- Yeah.
- I do.
854
00:31:33,143 --> 00:31:35,061
I think I'm too good
for the chain.
855
00:31:35,061 --> 00:31:36,730
Oh. I'm sorry you don't wanna
help your friend.
856
00:31:36,730 --> 00:31:38,523
- Help?
- You know,
it takes minimal effort
857
00:31:38,523 --> 00:31:39,691
just to reply.
858
00:31:39,691 --> 00:31:42,027
Even a "ha-ha" or a thumbs up--
859
00:31:42,027 --> 00:31:44,195
Oh, really?
Are there funny things on there
860
00:31:44,195 --> 00:31:45,864
- that require a ha-ha?
- I mean--
861
00:31:45,864 --> 00:31:48,033
If you read through it,
there's a lot of--
862
00:31:48,033 --> 00:31:49,701
- Can I be honest with you?
- WAYLAN: Please.
863
00:31:49,701 --> 00:31:51,536
I'm overwhelmed by this chain.
864
00:31:51,536 --> 00:31:53,455
Every two minutes it's, "Ding!"
865
00:31:53,455 --> 00:31:55,206
I'm getting a ding.
I'm getting a ding.
866
00:31:55,206 --> 00:31:58,418
Too many dings! And what is it?
It's just these ridiculous,
867
00:31:58,418 --> 00:32:01,713
inspirational sentiments
that amount to nothing.
868
00:32:01,713 --> 00:32:03,048
They're all trite.
869
00:32:03,048 --> 00:32:05,925
I don't even know why
people bother to write them!
870
00:32:05,925 --> 00:32:08,803
- It's been a really hard time
for the family, so--
- You want me to give it a ha-ha?
871
00:32:08,803 --> 00:32:10,638
- A ha-ha?
- Or a heart.
872
00:32:10,638 --> 00:32:11,931
That's also an option.
873
00:32:11,931 --> 00:32:13,808
But it seems like
that's too much for you.
874
00:32:13,808 --> 00:32:15,143
You know what's too much for me?
875
00:32:15,143 --> 00:32:17,437
This chain is too much for me.
I want off this chain.
876
00:32:17,437 --> 00:32:19,397
Once you're off the chain,
you can't get back on the chain.
877
00:32:19,397 --> 00:32:21,316
Oh, don't.
Don't say that. Really?
878
00:32:21,316 --> 00:32:23,109
I would text this to you,
but I know you won't read it,
879
00:32:23,109 --> 00:32:24,444
so here's the real-life emoji.
880
00:32:24,444 --> 00:32:26,738
- There you go.
- Oh! I'll give that a ha-ha!
881
00:32:26,738 --> 00:32:28,448
- No, ha-ha to you.
- Ha! Ha-ha!
882
00:32:28,448 --> 00:32:30,533
- Ha-ha to you, sir.
- LARRY: Ah, ha-ha!
883
00:32:30,533 --> 00:32:31,326
You know, you're a real asshole.
884
00:32:31,326 --> 00:32:32,911
- Oh, I'm an asshole?
- Yeah. Yeah.
885
00:32:32,911 --> 00:32:34,245
- Oh, I'm an asshole.
- WAYLAN: Yeah.
886
00:32:34,245 --> 00:32:36,706
I'm the one writing--
I'm the one writing,
887
00:32:36,706 --> 00:32:40,794
"Tough times remind us
that our spirits are strong!"
888
00:32:40,794 --> 00:32:42,712
- Yeah, I wrote that!
- Yeah, I know you did!
889
00:32:42,712 --> 00:32:44,547
Well, heart it if you like it!
890
00:32:44,547 --> 00:32:46,508
- Yeah, I'll heart it.
- Oh, is that an emoji?
891
00:32:46,508 --> 00:32:48,218
- LARRY: Smiley--
- That's a nice smiley face.
892
00:32:48,218 --> 00:32:49,928
- Yeah. Oh, oh, oh.
- Oh. Oh, the praise hands.
893
00:32:49,928 --> 00:32:52,764
- So you know the emojis,
you just won't use them.
- LARRY: Praise-- Praise hands.
894
00:32:52,764 --> 00:32:54,099
WAYLAN: Oh, nice. A thumbs-up.
895
00:32:54,099 --> 00:32:56,017
- Well, ha-ha to you, sir.
- LARRY: Ha-ha!
896
00:32:56,017 --> 00:32:58,019
Ha-ha to you. Yeah, yeah.
897
00:32:58,019 --> 00:33:00,188
- Thank you. Fuck you.
- Oh, ho-ho!
898
00:33:00,188 --> 00:33:03,441
♪ (QUIRKY MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
899
00:33:03,441 --> 00:33:05,193
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
900
00:33:05,193 --> 00:33:07,821
- Larry! What a surprise.
- ♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪
901
00:33:07,821 --> 00:33:10,949
Hi. Um, you know,
I thought I'd come over
902
00:33:10,949 --> 00:33:14,035
and, uh, pick up the violin.
903
00:33:14,035 --> 00:33:15,995
You know, I don't want
to appear insensitive,
904
00:33:15,995 --> 00:33:18,164
- but, you know, just in case.
- Oh. No.
905
00:33:18,164 --> 00:33:19,916
I'll get--
I'll get a head start on things.
906
00:33:19,916 --> 00:33:21,960
No, there's no need.
Freddy's here.
907
00:33:21,960 --> 00:33:24,087
- What?
- Stu made a change.
908
00:33:24,087 --> 00:33:26,006
Freddy's taking the violin.
909
00:33:26,006 --> 00:33:28,133
- Are you-- What?
- Yeah.
910
00:33:29,092 --> 00:33:31,553
- Hey! Hey!
- (DOOR CLOSES)
911
00:33:31,553 --> 00:33:33,304
LARRY: What are you--
What are you doing?
912
00:33:33,304 --> 00:33:35,140
- What are you doing here?
- What are you doing?
913
00:33:35,140 --> 00:33:36,516
I'm fulfilling my obligation
to Stu.
914
00:33:36,516 --> 00:33:38,143
- You don't get the violin.
- FREDDY: Listen to me--
915
00:33:38,143 --> 00:33:39,310
- I get the violin.
- Listen. No, no, no, no.
916
00:33:39,310 --> 00:33:40,812
Stu put me
in charge of the violin.
917
00:33:40,812 --> 00:33:42,147
LARRY: No,
I think you're mistaken.
918
00:33:42,147 --> 00:33:43,314
- What's going on?
- Doesn't Stu want me--
919
00:33:43,314 --> 00:33:45,984
Freddy went to see Stu
at the hospital,
920
00:33:45,984 --> 00:33:48,153
and he got tired,
he fell asleep,
921
00:33:48,153 --> 00:33:51,990
and he had these nightmares
about raising Olivia.
922
00:33:51,990 --> 00:33:55,201
Oh! (LAUGHS) Really?
923
00:33:55,201 --> 00:33:57,162
I wonder
where you got that from!
924
00:33:57,162 --> 00:33:59,706
He was having nightmares!
It's all bullshit!
925
00:33:59,706 --> 00:34:00,999
There's no nightmares!
926
00:34:00,999 --> 00:34:02,500
- It's a nightmare con!
- (DOOR OPENS)
927
00:34:02,500 --> 00:34:04,794
And I know,
'cause I invented it!
928
00:34:04,794 --> 00:34:07,172
- It's a scam!
- What! A scam?
929
00:34:07,172 --> 00:34:09,382
You invented the nightmare con?
930
00:34:09,382 --> 00:34:11,885
Jeff's dream
was all a fucking lie?
931
00:34:11,885 --> 00:34:14,262
- No, but he-- I--
- Oh, I am so on to you
932
00:34:14,262 --> 00:34:15,638
and your little friend Jeff.
933
00:34:15,638 --> 00:34:17,182
Well, I didn't put him up to it.
934
00:34:17,182 --> 00:34:19,017
Oh, man, I'm gonna kill
that fat motherfucker!
935
00:34:19,017 --> 00:34:21,478
Oh, I brought you a kale salad
as a peace offering.
936
00:34:21,478 --> 00:34:23,271
You know,
it hardly has any calories.
937
00:34:23,271 --> 00:34:25,106
And I'm gonna
fucking kill him, Larry!
938
00:34:25,106 --> 00:34:27,692
And it's gonna be your fault!
Enjoy.
939
00:34:27,692 --> 00:34:31,446
- ♪ (UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
- (DOOR SLAMS)
940
00:34:32,530 --> 00:34:34,074
LARRY: No, no, no!
Don't even think about it!
941
00:34:34,074 --> 00:34:35,450
- FREDDY: I move the Heifetz!
- Don't! No, no, no, no!
942
00:34:35,450 --> 00:34:37,160
- They want me to have it!
- Give me the fucking thing!
943
00:34:37,160 --> 00:34:38,453
- Give it to me!
- GINA: Stop it!
944
00:34:38,453 --> 00:34:42,207
Stop it! Put it back!
Put it back and get out!
945
00:34:42,207 --> 00:34:44,542
♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪
946
00:34:44,542 --> 00:34:45,627
All right.
947
00:34:46,878 --> 00:34:48,713
♪ (PLUCKS VIOLIN) ♪
948
00:34:52,592 --> 00:34:54,177
Yeah, I'm so sorry.
949
00:34:56,012 --> 00:34:57,222
(GASPS)
950
00:35:03,353 --> 00:35:04,562
Get out!
951
00:35:04,562 --> 00:35:08,316
I don't want either one of you
taking care of anything!
952
00:35:10,777 --> 00:35:12,112
You have a lovely home.
953
00:35:14,906 --> 00:35:16,157
We'll, uh...
954
00:35:17,075 --> 00:35:18,618
We'll talk on the text chain.
955
00:35:20,995 --> 00:35:22,288
(STRING WHIPS)
956
00:35:24,541 --> 00:35:25,417
Okay.
957
00:35:25,417 --> 00:35:28,628
♪ (QUIRKY MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
958
00:35:28,628 --> 00:35:30,588
(BOTH SIGH)
959
00:35:32,632 --> 00:35:34,926
- Not bad. Yeah?
- Eh.
960
00:35:34,926 --> 00:35:36,720
- You know what?
- Hmm?
961
00:35:36,720 --> 00:35:39,097
I think you would've been
a much better dad.
962
00:35:39,097 --> 00:35:41,349
- Are we talking
in all seriousness?
- LARRY: In all seriousness.
963
00:35:41,349 --> 00:35:42,767
You would've been
a hell of a father.
964
00:35:42,767 --> 00:35:43,727
LARRY: Are you kidding?
965
00:35:43,727 --> 00:35:45,854
Social workers would've
descended on the house
966
00:35:45,854 --> 00:35:47,230
within two weeks.
967
00:35:47,230 --> 00:35:50,150
- (KNOCKING ON DOOR)
- (EXHALES)
968
00:35:52,152 --> 00:35:53,903
Oh. Hi.
969
00:35:53,903 --> 00:35:55,739
- I'm Renee.
- Yeah.
970
00:35:55,739 --> 00:35:58,116
- We met.
- I remember.
971
00:35:58,116 --> 00:36:00,201
Hey, listen.
About the other day,
972
00:36:00,201 --> 00:36:02,120
I know it was really awkward,
973
00:36:02,120 --> 00:36:03,830
but it's not even
really my thing.
974
00:36:03,830 --> 00:36:04,998
You know? It's Larry's thing.
975
00:36:04,998 --> 00:36:07,792
- He really likes that. I mean--
- Yeah.
976
00:36:07,792 --> 00:36:10,003
Anyway, uh, where's Larry?
977
00:36:10,003 --> 00:36:11,629
- He's not here.
- RENEE: Got it.
978
00:36:11,629 --> 00:36:13,256
Well, I'm gonna leave this here
for him,
979
00:36:13,256 --> 00:36:15,050
because someone from the gallery
is gonna be by later
980
00:36:15,050 --> 00:36:18,970
to box it up before the showing,
but I-- I wanted him to see it.
981
00:36:18,970 --> 00:36:20,388
- (GRUNTS)
- I take it.
982
00:36:21,389 --> 00:36:22,974
Okay. Do you need some help?
983
00:36:24,559 --> 00:36:26,978
- ♪ (QUIRKY MUSIC CONTINUES) ♪
- Guess not.
984
00:36:36,905 --> 00:36:38,198
(AIRPLANE ENGINE RUMBLING)
985
00:36:41,076 --> 00:36:45,705
- (BABY CRYING)
- ♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪
986
00:36:45,705 --> 00:36:48,166
- (CART RATTLES)
- (INDISTINCT CHATTER)
987
00:36:48,166 --> 00:36:51,211
Excuse me.
Could I have a-- a water?
988
00:36:52,587 --> 00:36:53,922
PILOT: (OVER SPEAKER)
This is your pilot speaking.
989
00:36:53,922 --> 00:36:56,466
I'm sorry to report that due
to some inclement weather
990
00:36:56,466 --> 00:36:57,634
in the Raleigh-Durham area,
991
00:36:57,634 --> 00:36:59,594
this flight is being diverted
to Greensboro.
992
00:36:59,594 --> 00:37:01,304
- (PASSENGERS GROAN)
- PILOT: Ground control
has informed me
993
00:37:01,304 --> 00:37:04,015
that we'll be able to bus you
to your final destinations.
994
00:37:04,015 --> 00:37:06,976
♪ (QUIRKY MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
995
00:37:16,152 --> 00:37:18,697
So he jumped
right into Sheepshead Bay.
996
00:37:18,697 --> 00:37:22,701
- Can you believe it?
- (LAUGHS) Oh, no, that's crazy.
997
00:37:22,701 --> 00:37:26,788
♪ ("CURB YOUR ENTHUSIASM"
THEME MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
998
00:37:27,872 --> 00:37:29,290
What the fuck?
999
00:37:29,874 --> 00:37:32,961
(INDISTINCT MURMURING)
1000
00:37:37,966 --> 00:37:40,343
♪ (THEME MUSIC CONTINUES) ♪
1001
00:38:46,326 --> 00:38:48,119
♪ (THEME MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪