1 00:00:00,333 --> 00:00:01,883 ♪ Born on the wrong end Of the leash ♪ 2 00:00:01,959 --> 00:00:04,289 -♪ He was a dreamer ♪ -♪ And a little schemer ♪ 3 00:00:04,375 --> 00:00:05,665 ♪ A nutty mutt living a dog's life ♪ 4 00:00:05,750 --> 00:00:07,420 ♪ But when he'd hear the bell for school ♪ 5 00:00:07,500 --> 00:00:08,420 ♪ He'd start to drool ♪ 6 00:00:08,500 --> 00:00:10,130 -♪ One day he says ♪ -♪ I'll take a chance ♪ 7 00:00:10,208 --> 00:00:11,748 ♪ Trades his leash For a pair of pants ♪ 8 00:00:11,834 --> 00:00:14,174 ♪ In a glance, school becomes His favorite pastime ♪ 9 00:00:14,250 --> 00:00:16,580 ♪ I have buried a bone for the last time ♪ 10 00:00:16,667 --> 00:00:17,997 -♪ He says ♪ -♪ I want to be a boy ♪ 11 00:00:18,083 --> 00:00:19,833 ♪ Ooh, he's bad ♪ 12 00:00:19,917 --> 00:00:21,207 ♪ He's so over just being rover ♪ 13 00:00:21,291 --> 00:00:22,581 ♪ I gotta be a boy ♪ 14 00:00:22,667 --> 00:00:25,207 ♪ He says he's just gonna be a boy ♪ 15 00:00:25,291 --> 00:00:26,671 ♪ Turns out he's a regular Einstein ♪ 16 00:00:26,750 --> 00:00:28,710 ♪ And Leonard is treading a fine line ♪ 17 00:00:28,792 --> 00:00:30,962 Why can't I be a normal kid like any other? 18 00:00:31,041 --> 00:00:33,041 Now, doodle bug, listen to mother. 19 00:00:33,125 --> 00:00:34,915 ♪ I want to be a boy ♪ 20 00:00:35,000 --> 00:00:36,750 I hate dogs. 21 00:00:36,834 --> 00:00:39,714 ♪ I gotta be a boy ♪ 22 00:00:39,792 --> 00:00:41,462 ♪ This power pup's gonna be a boy ♪ 23 00:00:41,542 --> 00:00:43,462 I do not wish to be a dog. 24 00:00:43,542 --> 00:00:46,082 ♪ Now this bowser's ready for trousers ♪ 25 00:00:46,166 --> 00:00:47,496 ♪ I got to be a boy ♪ 26 00:00:47,583 --> 00:00:49,083 ♪ His nose is wet but you can bet ♪ 27 00:00:49,166 --> 00:00:52,206 ♪ This teacher's pet is gonna be a boy ♪ 28 00:00:52,291 --> 00:00:53,541 Yes! 29 00:01:09,625 --> 00:01:10,745 Okey-dokey, dominokey. 30 00:01:10,834 --> 00:01:12,834 We've got your protein for brain food, 31 00:01:12,917 --> 00:01:15,747 your complex carbs to keep Mr. Blood Sugar up, 32 00:01:15,834 --> 00:01:18,254 and a squidge of syrup 33 00:01:18,333 --> 00:01:19,673 just 'cause you're so sweet. 34 00:01:20,834 --> 00:01:22,134 I cannot eat all this, mom. 35 00:01:22,208 --> 00:01:23,578 Do your best. 36 00:01:23,667 --> 00:01:25,167 Big exam today-- 37 00:01:25,250 --> 00:01:28,080 the National Aptitude Scholastic Test Yearly, 38 00:01:28,166 --> 00:01:29,876 or N.A.S.T.Y. for short, 39 00:01:29,959 --> 00:01:32,289 but it won't be if you're prepared. 40 00:01:32,375 --> 00:01:33,915 Ha ha ha. 41 00:01:35,250 --> 00:01:38,630 This is perfect. The biggest test of my academic career, 42 00:01:38,709 --> 00:01:40,579 and what's supposed to fortify me? 43 00:01:40,667 --> 00:01:43,537 "Poultry byproducts, corn gluten meal, 44 00:01:43,625 --> 00:01:48,535 ferrosulfate hydrochloride, and manganese oxide"? 45 00:01:48,625 --> 00:01:50,205 I got to get me some real food. 46 00:01:50,291 --> 00:01:51,791 Psst! Leonard! 47 00:01:54,625 --> 00:01:55,915 Go for it. 48 00:01:59,083 --> 00:02:00,923 Mmm-mmm, protein at last. 49 00:02:01,000 --> 00:02:02,080 Ahh. 50 00:02:02,166 --> 00:02:05,576 Now I feel the old synapses starting to fire. 51 00:02:05,667 --> 00:02:07,247 Spot, get down! 52 00:02:07,333 --> 00:02:09,333 Leonard, don't let him eat off your dish! 53 00:02:09,375 --> 00:02:10,875 [both] Darn. 54 00:02:15,834 --> 00:02:17,134 [moans] 55 00:02:17,208 --> 00:02:19,998 My mom made me eat three bowls of oatmeal 56 00:02:20,083 --> 00:02:21,503 and last night's ham. 57 00:02:21,583 --> 00:02:23,713 I had to finish a protein shake 58 00:02:23,792 --> 00:02:25,252 and two granola bars. 59 00:02:25,333 --> 00:02:27,793 I polished off a tasty fish head, 60 00:02:27,875 --> 00:02:29,455 eyes and all. 61 00:02:32,083 --> 00:02:36,133 Mmm. Even better the second time. 62 00:02:36,208 --> 00:02:37,998 [all groan] 63 00:02:38,083 --> 00:02:40,003 ♪ With every turn Of the grinding blade ♪ 64 00:02:40,083 --> 00:02:41,673 ♪ My pencil grows sharper And so does my brain ♪ 65 00:02:41,750 --> 00:02:43,130 ♪ With every turn Of the grinding blade ♪ 66 00:02:43,208 --> 00:02:45,128 ♪ My pencil grows sharper And so does my brain ♪ 67 00:02:45,208 --> 00:02:46,708 Excuse me. 68 00:02:46,792 --> 00:02:48,922 The rest of us have pencils, too. 69 00:02:49,000 --> 00:02:50,250 Ha ha. Sorry. 70 00:02:50,333 --> 00:02:52,713 All righty, mighty test-takers, 71 00:02:52,792 --> 00:02:55,712 don't turn your booklets over till I say go. Go! 72 00:02:55,792 --> 00:02:58,082 That always cracks me up. 73 00:03:00,333 --> 00:03:03,173 [thinking]" B"-- the answer is "B". 74 00:03:03,250 --> 00:03:05,080 Just find the little "B" bubble 75 00:03:05,166 --> 00:03:06,416 and fill it in. 76 00:03:06,500 --> 00:03:08,460 Is that dark enough? 77 00:03:08,542 --> 00:03:11,042 No, no, it should be darker. There, that's dark enough. 78 00:03:11,125 --> 00:03:13,375 Darn! I made a hole in the paper. 79 00:03:13,458 --> 00:03:15,038 ♪ The answer to that is "B" ♪ 80 00:03:15,125 --> 00:03:16,875 ♪ The answer to that is "C" ♪ 81 00:03:16,959 --> 00:03:18,289 ♪ Yuh-duh-duh-duh Da-da-da-da ♪ 82 00:03:18,375 --> 00:03:19,955 ♪ Hey, none of the above, whoa ♪ 83 00:03:20,041 --> 00:03:20,921 Shush! 84 00:03:21,000 --> 00:03:23,500 Sorry, sister. My bad. 85 00:03:24,583 --> 00:03:25,583 [bell rings] 86 00:03:25,667 --> 00:03:27,577 Boys and girls, I have the results 87 00:03:27,667 --> 00:03:30,077 of the N.A.S.T.Y. test you took last week, 88 00:03:30,166 --> 00:03:31,576 and there's great news. 89 00:03:31,667 --> 00:03:33,667 One of our students has achieved the highest score 90 00:03:33,750 --> 00:03:35,710 in the history of the fourth grade 91 00:03:35,792 --> 00:03:37,002 at this school. 92 00:03:37,083 --> 00:03:38,173 Was it me? 93 00:03:38,250 --> 00:03:42,130 Yeah, right. It was Scott Leadready II. 94 00:03:42,208 --> 00:03:46,788 Me? Ha ha ha. I had no idea. 95 00:03:46,875 --> 00:03:48,825 I don't have anything prepared. 96 00:03:48,917 --> 00:03:50,577 [hisses] 97 00:03:50,667 --> 00:03:52,377 Oh, what is it, Tallulah? 98 00:03:52,458 --> 00:03:54,828 Why are you acting so strangely? 99 00:03:54,917 --> 00:03:57,167 Is it because perhaps you know 100 00:03:57,250 --> 00:04:00,670 that Scott Leadready is no ordinary fourth-grade boy? 101 00:04:00,750 --> 00:04:02,080 What? Yes, I am. 102 00:04:02,166 --> 00:04:03,286 No, you're not! 103 00:04:03,375 --> 00:04:05,455 With a N.A.S.T.Y. Test score like this, 104 00:04:05,542 --> 00:04:08,462 you've just been promoted to the fifth grade. 105 00:04:08,542 --> 00:04:11,172 [cheering] 106 00:04:12,792 --> 00:04:15,132 Ah, the fifth grade. 107 00:04:15,208 --> 00:04:18,288 It seems like just yesterday I was in the fourth grade. 108 00:04:18,375 --> 00:04:19,955 It was just yesterday. 109 00:04:20,041 --> 00:04:21,541 My, how time flies. 110 00:04:21,625 --> 00:04:23,745 Just think, at the rate I'm going, 111 00:04:23,834 --> 00:04:26,294 this time next year I could be in college. 112 00:04:26,375 --> 00:04:27,245 Isn't it enough 113 00:04:27,333 --> 00:04:29,043 that you're going to be a grade ahead of me? 114 00:04:29,125 --> 00:04:32,075 Perhaps for some, but now that I've had a taste of life 115 00:04:32,166 --> 00:04:33,706 in the fast lane, 116 00:04:33,792 --> 00:04:37,042 I don't know that I can ever drive the speed limit. 117 00:04:37,125 --> 00:04:39,205 Here comes Scott. 118 00:04:39,291 --> 00:04:42,041 -Ooh, he's a special boy! -Man, he's so cool! 119 00:04:42,125 --> 00:04:44,035 Hey, Scott, remember us? 120 00:04:44,125 --> 00:04:46,165 Why, no, I don't believe I-- 121 00:04:46,250 --> 00:04:48,710 of course I do! 122 00:04:48,792 --> 00:04:49,882 [laughing] 123 00:04:49,959 --> 00:04:53,129 -He's so funny. -Ooh, he's dreamy. 124 00:04:53,208 --> 00:04:54,628 Oh, man. 125 00:04:54,709 --> 00:04:56,419 Of all the dogs they could have promoted... 126 00:04:57,667 --> 00:05:00,377 Well, Leonard, it's been a slice of cheese, 127 00:05:00,458 --> 00:05:02,498 but the fifth grade awaits. 128 00:05:02,583 --> 00:05:05,713 Farewell. Parting is such sweet sorrow. 129 00:05:05,792 --> 00:05:09,502 Bill Shakespeare-- big fifth grade writer. 130 00:05:11,667 --> 00:05:13,457 Hey! Aren't you the new fifth grader? 131 00:05:13,542 --> 00:05:16,002 Yes, sir, sir. That I am, sir. 132 00:05:16,083 --> 00:05:18,213 What are you doing out here lollygagging? 133 00:05:18,291 --> 00:05:19,961 We got work to do, mister! 134 00:05:23,458 --> 00:05:27,538 Wow, it is bigger in fifth grade. 135 00:05:29,125 --> 00:05:31,125 Hey, is that stubble on your chin? 136 00:05:31,208 --> 00:05:34,208 No, dufus, it's ink from my pen. 137 00:05:34,291 --> 00:05:36,461 Wow, they use ink in fifth grade. 138 00:05:36,542 --> 00:05:38,712 Everything is happening so fast. 139 00:05:42,125 --> 00:05:44,955 Okay, everyone got that down? 140 00:05:45,041 --> 00:05:46,751 Uh, wait a sec. 141 00:05:46,834 --> 00:05:49,294 Do we have a problem, Mr. Leadready? 142 00:05:49,375 --> 00:05:50,955 Who, sir? Me, sir? No, sir. 143 00:05:51,041 --> 00:05:53,211 Hey, ever been to Big Sur, sir? 144 00:05:53,291 --> 00:05:54,711 Zip it. 145 00:05:54,792 --> 00:05:57,042 Yes, sir. Oh, kind of surly, sir. 146 00:05:57,125 --> 00:05:59,785 Well, I said I wanted a challenge. 147 00:06:04,250 --> 00:06:07,290 Okay, finished my 15 minutes of silent reading. 148 00:06:07,375 --> 00:06:10,915 Homework's done. Time to play. 149 00:06:11,000 --> 00:06:13,330 Come on, Spot, let's go throw a ball around. 150 00:06:13,417 --> 00:06:14,747 I can't. 151 00:06:14,834 --> 00:06:17,334 I've got 43 more pre-algebra problems, 152 00:06:17,417 --> 00:06:19,327 100 vocabulary words to look up, 153 00:06:19,417 --> 00:06:22,327 and I'm supposed to outline the next eight chapters 154 00:06:22,417 --> 00:06:24,627 of "Health For Kids, Grade Five." 155 00:06:24,709 --> 00:06:27,079 Ah, it's nice to just be a pet, 156 00:06:27,166 --> 00:06:28,916 isn't it, Mr. Jolly? 157 00:06:29,000 --> 00:06:30,670 Oh, indubitably, Pretty Boy. 158 00:06:30,750 --> 00:06:32,130 No stress, no worries. 159 00:06:32,208 --> 00:06:33,748 Someone else takes care 160 00:06:33,834 --> 00:06:35,754 of your every whim, your every need. 161 00:06:35,834 --> 00:06:37,214 Ha ha ha. 162 00:06:37,291 --> 00:06:39,631 All you got to do is play dumb, 163 00:06:39,709 --> 00:06:42,249 but you, you're too dumb to play dumb. 164 00:06:42,333 --> 00:06:44,963 Ha ha ha! 165 00:06:45,041 --> 00:06:47,541 Hey, Pretty Boy, Mr. Jolly, want to play? 166 00:06:47,625 --> 00:06:50,375 When you love your work, it's not work. 167 00:06:50,458 --> 00:06:51,958 It is play. 168 00:06:52,041 --> 00:06:57,001 [Mr. Jolly] You're it. Ha ha ha! 169 00:06:57,083 --> 00:06:58,753 Oop, you missed me. 170 00:06:58,834 --> 00:07:00,254 Ha ha ha! 171 00:07:00,333 --> 00:07:04,083 Whoo-hoo! Whoa! Ha ha ha. 172 00:07:06,959 --> 00:07:09,129 Hurry up. We're going to be late for school. 173 00:07:09,208 --> 00:07:13,418 Uh, sorry, but some of us have a little more 174 00:07:13,500 --> 00:07:15,420 in their backpack than just lunch-- 175 00:07:15,500 --> 00:07:17,580 Shakespeare, pre-algebra...ugh! 176 00:07:17,667 --> 00:07:19,877 Yeah, yeah, just come on. 177 00:07:19,959 --> 00:07:21,459 I don't want to be tardy. 178 00:07:21,542 --> 00:07:24,132 We're having a storyteller come to class today. 179 00:07:24,208 --> 00:07:26,828 A storyteller? Oh. 180 00:07:26,917 --> 00:07:29,207 I remember storytellers. 181 00:07:29,291 --> 00:07:33,211 They talk, and all you got to do is listen. 182 00:07:33,291 --> 00:07:36,831 Not nearly as rewarding as Shakespeare, 183 00:07:36,917 --> 00:07:39,287 but fun in a fourth grade kind of way. 184 00:07:39,375 --> 00:07:41,035 Hey, Leadready, what are you doing 185 00:07:41,125 --> 00:07:42,705 hanging around that kindergartner? 186 00:07:42,792 --> 00:07:45,582 I'm not a kindergartner. I'm a fourth grader. 187 00:07:45,667 --> 00:07:47,037 Tell them. 188 00:07:47,125 --> 00:07:49,745 Uh, yeah, right. I'll go set them straight. 189 00:07:49,834 --> 00:07:52,384 Uh, look, fellas, 190 00:07:52,458 --> 00:07:54,378 I helped him cross the street 191 00:07:54,458 --> 00:07:57,378 and then I didn't have the heart to ditch him. 192 00:07:57,458 --> 00:08:00,128 He wanted to hang with a fifth grader. 193 00:08:00,208 --> 00:08:02,788 What are you going to do, right, homeys? 194 00:08:05,750 --> 00:08:07,880 [bell rings] 195 00:08:07,959 --> 00:08:12,249 [cheering] 196 00:08:12,333 --> 00:08:15,133 Hi, Scott. 197 00:08:15,208 --> 00:08:16,668 Uh, yo, Scott, 198 00:08:16,750 --> 00:08:18,290 uh, there's your little buddy again. 199 00:08:18,375 --> 00:08:19,915 Um, oh, so it is. 200 00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:21,880 Hey, let's give him a thrill-- 201 00:08:21,959 --> 00:08:24,289 let him spend recess with the big kids. 202 00:08:24,375 --> 00:08:25,535 Really? You mean it? 203 00:08:25,625 --> 00:08:28,825 Uh, yeah, sure. Go get him. 204 00:08:28,917 --> 00:08:31,207 It'll be a blast. 205 00:08:32,458 --> 00:08:34,748 Hey, they want you to come hang out with us. 206 00:08:34,834 --> 00:08:35,834 Get out! 207 00:08:35,917 --> 00:08:36,917 No, really. 208 00:08:37,000 --> 00:08:39,960 Really? Well, okay. 209 00:08:41,583 --> 00:08:43,923 H-Hi. Hi, guys. 210 00:08:44,000 --> 00:08:47,460 Hey! Oh! Whoa! 211 00:08:47,542 --> 00:08:50,082 Hey, guys, I'm claustrophobic. 212 00:08:50,166 --> 00:08:52,036 Come on! Get me out of here! 213 00:08:52,125 --> 00:08:55,035 Hey, hey! What are you doing, guys? 214 00:08:55,125 --> 00:08:57,325 [shouting] 215 00:08:57,417 --> 00:08:59,667 Oh, my gosh. I can't believe it. 216 00:08:59,750 --> 00:09:01,830 I was part of a dastardly plot 217 00:09:01,917 --> 00:09:03,827 to trash-can my best friend. 218 00:09:03,917 --> 00:09:04,997 What have I become? 219 00:09:05,083 --> 00:09:07,213 You're a fifth grader, man. 220 00:09:07,291 --> 00:09:09,541 Come on. Let's go do some more. 221 00:09:09,625 --> 00:09:14,205 [kids] Trash can! Trash can! Trash can! Trash can! 222 00:09:24,375 --> 00:09:27,075 Leonard, I didn't mean to, um... 223 00:09:27,166 --> 00:09:29,746 I-I didn't want to, uh, have-- 224 00:09:29,834 --> 00:09:31,924 I tried to, um... 225 00:09:32,000 --> 00:09:33,330 Oh. 226 00:09:42,417 --> 00:09:45,417 Oh, nothing feels right to me anymore, Mrs. H. 227 00:09:45,500 --> 00:09:47,420 I miss the fourth grade. 228 00:09:47,500 --> 00:09:50,210 I miss salt-and-flour maps of South American countries 229 00:09:50,291 --> 00:09:52,001 and multiplying with jellybeans. 230 00:09:52,083 --> 00:09:54,003 I miss singing protest songs 231 00:09:54,083 --> 00:09:56,963 on Martin Luther King Jr.'s birthday. 232 00:09:57,041 --> 00:10:00,881 ♪ We shall not be moved ♪ 233 00:10:00,959 --> 00:10:03,919 And most of all, I miss my friend Leonard. 234 00:10:04,000 --> 00:10:05,580 He's my pal. 235 00:10:05,667 --> 00:10:07,577 I want to go through the grades 236 00:10:07,667 --> 00:10:09,247 with him by my side, 237 00:10:09,333 --> 00:10:11,583 not upside down in a trash can. 238 00:10:11,667 --> 00:10:13,077 [gasps] What? 239 00:10:13,166 --> 00:10:14,786 Uh, that's just a for-instance. 240 00:10:14,875 --> 00:10:17,705 Aw, don't you see what I'm sayin' here, teach? 241 00:10:17,792 --> 00:10:20,082 I thought I was ready to grow up, 242 00:10:20,166 --> 00:10:21,496 but I was wrong. 243 00:10:21,583 --> 00:10:25,083 I love the fourth grade and I want to come back. 244 00:10:25,166 --> 00:10:26,996 I want to be here now! 245 00:10:27,083 --> 00:10:28,923 [door opens] 246 00:10:30,458 --> 00:10:33,578 Well, if that doesn't just make me want to cry, 247 00:10:33,667 --> 00:10:35,577 I don't know what. 248 00:10:35,667 --> 00:10:37,877 Oh, come here. 249 00:10:45,417 --> 00:10:47,707 [bell rings] 250 00:10:49,917 --> 00:10:53,327 [whistling] 251 00:10:53,417 --> 00:10:55,377 Hey, what do you want to do, Miles? 252 00:10:55,458 --> 00:10:56,998 I don't know. 253 00:10:57,083 --> 00:10:59,583 Say, Max, we haven't trash-canned 254 00:10:59,667 --> 00:11:01,577 any little kids in a while. 255 00:11:05,000 --> 00:11:08,500 [shouting] 256 00:11:08,583 --> 00:11:10,253 [roars] 257 00:11:10,333 --> 00:11:12,333 And don't bother us anymore! 258 00:11:12,375 --> 00:11:14,875 Hold on, buddy. I'll get you out of there. 259 00:11:17,041 --> 00:11:19,831 [howls] 260 00:11:19,917 --> 00:11:22,707 How come nobody likes this? 261 00:11:26,041 --> 00:11:27,461 [whistle blowing] 262 00:11:27,542 --> 00:11:28,962 [alarm sounding] 263 00:11:29,083 --> 00:11:30,633 [dogs barking] 264 00:11:30,709 --> 00:11:33,289 [siren wailing] 265 00:11:46,667 --> 00:11:48,077 Ew! 266 00:11:48,166 --> 00:11:51,246 I am dog. Ergo, I drool. 267 00:11:51,333 --> 00:11:54,333 Leonard, honey, I've got to trit-trot next door 268 00:11:54,417 --> 00:11:57,457 and borrow a bag of broccoli for dinner tonight. 269 00:11:57,542 --> 00:12:00,252 Stay in the yard and keep an eye on Spot, okay? 270 00:12:00,333 --> 00:12:02,173 Okay, Mom! 271 00:12:02,250 --> 00:12:04,250 Hey, you hear that, Leonard? 272 00:12:04,333 --> 00:12:05,543 No. 273 00:12:05,625 --> 00:12:07,415 Just wait, boy ears. You will. 274 00:12:07,500 --> 00:12:09,290 [ice cream truck music playing ] 275 00:12:09,375 --> 00:12:11,495 [both] Ice cream! 276 00:12:13,625 --> 00:12:16,455 Ice cream. Mmm. 277 00:12:16,542 --> 00:12:19,172 I enjoy being a boy. 278 00:12:22,041 --> 00:12:23,961 Ooh! [zip] 279 00:12:24,041 --> 00:12:26,291 Never dress for ice cream in haste. 280 00:12:31,959 --> 00:12:36,079 Leonard Amadeus Helperman, where have you been? 281 00:12:36,166 --> 00:12:38,206 Amadeus? 282 00:12:38,291 --> 00:12:41,671 Didn't I ask you to stay right here in the yard? 283 00:12:41,750 --> 00:12:43,880 Well, but me and Scott-- I was only-- 284 00:12:43,959 --> 00:12:45,419 yes, ma'am. 285 00:12:45,500 --> 00:12:48,880 And now Spot is gone! I can't find him anywhere. 286 00:12:48,959 --> 00:12:51,629 I am very disappointed with you. 287 00:12:51,709 --> 00:12:54,829 After all, he is just a poor helpless dog. 288 00:12:54,917 --> 00:12:57,077 He doesn't know any better. 289 00:12:57,166 --> 00:12:59,956 There's no need to insult my intelligence. 290 00:13:00,041 --> 00:13:02,291 Oh, but perhaps you know the dog best. 291 00:13:02,375 --> 00:13:04,075 He lives in your home. 292 00:13:04,166 --> 00:13:06,576 Wait. I think I hear my mother calling me. 293 00:13:06,667 --> 00:13:08,577 Scott! Coming, mother! 294 00:13:09,750 --> 00:13:11,290 [barking] 295 00:13:11,375 --> 00:13:13,535 Oh, my poor little Spotty. 296 00:13:13,625 --> 00:13:15,785 You're back. [sobbing] 297 00:13:15,875 --> 00:13:18,825 We thought we'd lost you forever. 298 00:13:18,917 --> 00:13:21,247 Leonard, our doggy is safe, 299 00:13:21,333 --> 00:13:24,673 and we'll never, ever lose him again. 300 00:13:24,750 --> 00:13:27,250 [thinking] I should have thought 301 00:13:27,333 --> 00:13:29,673 of this prodigal dog scam years ago. 302 00:13:29,750 --> 00:13:31,750 This is sweet. 303 00:13:35,959 --> 00:13:37,209 Mrs. Helperman, 304 00:13:37,291 --> 00:13:39,251 when the Doggy Dyne Detecto collar 305 00:13:39,333 --> 00:13:40,583 hits the vortex of lasers 306 00:13:40,667 --> 00:13:42,327 that make up our invisible fence, 307 00:13:42,417 --> 00:13:44,787 it activates a spray of pungent odors 308 00:13:44,875 --> 00:13:46,665 that only animals can smell, 309 00:13:46,750 --> 00:13:48,960 driving the victim, er, doggy, 310 00:13:49,041 --> 00:13:51,881 away from the perimeter. To wit... 311 00:13:51,959 --> 00:13:54,169 [alarm sounding] 312 00:13:54,250 --> 00:13:55,630 [whimpers] 313 00:13:55,709 --> 00:13:57,329 Ahh! Ahh! Ahh! 314 00:13:57,417 --> 00:13:59,127 Foul! Yuck! 315 00:13:59,208 --> 00:14:02,078 Ohh, month-old mushu pork. 316 00:14:02,166 --> 00:14:05,126 Ugh. The horror, the horror. 317 00:14:05,208 --> 00:14:08,788 Your dog will never leave this yard again. 318 00:14:08,875 --> 00:14:10,995 Well, that's just dandy. 319 00:14:12,333 --> 00:14:13,583 Are you okay, Spot? 320 00:14:13,667 --> 00:14:16,627 Oh, fine. Just fine. Of course I'm not okay! 321 00:14:16,709 --> 00:14:18,629 If I can't leave the yard, 322 00:14:18,709 --> 00:14:21,169 then I can't go to school tomorrow. 323 00:14:21,250 --> 00:14:23,790 That means I'll miss the history test 324 00:14:23,875 --> 00:14:25,375 and fail social studies, 325 00:14:25,458 --> 00:14:27,708 and then you can just toss Harvard, 326 00:14:27,792 --> 00:14:29,082 my naval career, 327 00:14:29,166 --> 00:14:31,076 and president pro tem of the senate 328 00:14:31,166 --> 00:14:33,076 right out the window, baby! 329 00:14:33,166 --> 00:14:35,076 Whoa, whoa, everything's going to be fine. 330 00:14:35,166 --> 00:14:36,746 I've got an idea. 331 00:14:44,417 --> 00:14:47,577 There. Spot is now totally safe. 332 00:14:47,667 --> 00:14:49,707 Yeah, but just to be really safe, 333 00:14:49,792 --> 00:14:51,752 shouldn't you tell me the code, too? 334 00:14:51,834 --> 00:14:54,254 You know, so I could turn off the fence 335 00:14:54,333 --> 00:14:56,543 in case you're going to be home late 336 00:14:56,625 --> 00:14:59,415 or, like, the house blows up or something. 337 00:14:59,500 --> 00:15:02,670 Well, yes, you should know the code, 338 00:15:02,750 --> 00:15:04,630 but you have to promise 339 00:15:04,709 --> 00:15:08,039 you won't ever, ever turn the system off 340 00:15:08,125 --> 00:15:10,325 unless you ask me first. 341 00:15:10,458 --> 00:15:12,788 Yes, ma'am. I promise. 342 00:15:12,875 --> 00:15:14,205 [groans] 343 00:15:14,291 --> 00:15:16,831 Well, okey-dokey, then. Let's get ready to scoot. 344 00:15:18,625 --> 00:15:21,035 Okay, I'll just be a little late to school, 345 00:15:21,125 --> 00:15:22,705 but I won't miss the history test. 346 00:15:22,792 --> 00:15:23,882 I can handle that. 347 00:15:23,959 --> 00:15:25,669 Spot, I can't turn the fence off. 348 00:15:25,750 --> 00:15:27,670 I just promised my mom. 349 00:15:27,750 --> 00:15:29,880 Yes, but... You didn't promise her 350 00:15:29,959 --> 00:15:32,579 you wouldn't tell me the security code 351 00:15:32,667 --> 00:15:34,627 so I could turn it off. 352 00:15:34,709 --> 00:15:36,919 Tell you the security-- 353 00:15:37,041 --> 00:15:39,211 you don't even have to tell me the code. 354 00:15:39,291 --> 00:15:41,211 You can accidentally cough it out. 355 00:15:41,291 --> 00:15:43,541 You could burp it out. You know... 356 00:15:43,625 --> 00:15:46,535 [burps] 1, 2, 3. 357 00:15:46,667 --> 00:15:49,327 Need I go on? You get the picture. 358 00:15:49,417 --> 00:15:51,127 I guess I could do that. 359 00:15:51,208 --> 00:15:54,248 [Mrs. Helperman] Leonard, honey, time to go. 360 00:15:54,333 --> 00:15:56,423 Leonard, my freedom is on the line here. 361 00:15:56,500 --> 00:15:58,540 You're going to help me, right? 362 00:15:58,667 --> 00:16:00,827 I don't know, Spot. I did make a promise. 363 00:16:00,917 --> 00:16:03,627 But maybe your freedom is more important than that. 364 00:16:03,750 --> 00:16:05,420 But what if I get caught? 365 00:16:05,500 --> 00:16:08,420 Is your freedom worth having my mom never trust me again? 366 00:16:08,500 --> 00:16:10,500 I'm sorry. I-I-I just-- 367 00:16:10,583 --> 00:16:12,333 come on, Mr. Lollygagger. 368 00:16:12,458 --> 00:16:13,538 Aah! 369 00:16:13,625 --> 00:16:15,245 [all] With liberty 370 00:16:15,375 --> 00:16:18,495 and justice for all. 371 00:16:18,583 --> 00:16:21,833 All except me, right, Leonard? 372 00:16:21,959 --> 00:16:24,329 [groans] 373 00:16:24,417 --> 00:16:27,577 And we call this unpaired electron 374 00:16:27,667 --> 00:16:29,667 a free radical. 375 00:16:29,750 --> 00:16:31,540 Ha ha ha. 376 00:16:31,625 --> 00:16:35,245 Electrons can be free but not a dog? 377 00:16:35,375 --> 00:16:37,535 Don't I deserve the same rights 378 00:16:37,625 --> 00:16:39,455 as a subatomic particle? 379 00:16:39,542 --> 00:16:41,082 [groans] 380 00:16:41,166 --> 00:16:45,376 So, in 1860, America elected a great president 381 00:16:45,458 --> 00:16:49,668 who was also a super-duper champion of freedom-- 382 00:16:49,750 --> 00:16:51,540 Abraham Lincoln. 383 00:16:51,625 --> 00:16:52,495 Ha ha. 384 00:16:54,625 --> 00:16:56,455 Whew. 385 00:16:56,542 --> 00:16:59,332 Go home and free your dog, son. 386 00:16:59,458 --> 00:17:01,668 Aah! I don't know what to do! 387 00:17:01,792 --> 00:17:03,712 Can't you just leave me alone? 388 00:17:03,834 --> 00:17:06,294 You're strange. 389 00:17:06,375 --> 00:17:08,375 Leonard, honey, 390 00:17:08,500 --> 00:17:10,420 are you all right? 391 00:17:10,542 --> 00:17:12,752 Uh, you know, 392 00:17:12,834 --> 00:17:15,504 all of a sudden, I'm not feeling so well. 393 00:17:15,583 --> 00:17:17,753 [playing the blues] 394 00:17:20,333 --> 00:17:21,633 [sighs] 395 00:17:21,709 --> 00:17:23,669 I had such plans, too. 396 00:17:23,750 --> 00:17:27,420 Did you know I was going to be the first dog elected pope? 397 00:17:27,500 --> 00:17:29,420 Spot, you are going to be free. 398 00:17:29,500 --> 00:17:34,040 Leonard, you broke a promise to your sainted mother. 399 00:17:34,125 --> 00:17:35,415 I knew you had it in you. 400 00:17:35,500 --> 00:17:37,420 Quick-- let's turn off that fence and get out of here. 401 00:17:37,500 --> 00:17:38,880 Not so fast. 402 00:17:39,000 --> 00:17:42,420 I promised my mom I wouldn't turn off the fence, 403 00:17:42,500 --> 00:17:43,920 but I didn't promise her 404 00:17:44,041 --> 00:17:46,381 I wouldn't get you out of your collar. 405 00:18:03,625 --> 00:18:05,495 [both] Nah. 406 00:18:05,583 --> 00:18:08,083 I don't see what the big problem is. 407 00:18:08,166 --> 00:18:10,456 Why don't you just collapse your bones 408 00:18:10,542 --> 00:18:12,582 and slip out like me? 409 00:18:14,500 --> 00:18:15,710 I know, Spot. 410 00:18:15,792 --> 00:18:17,212 Why don't you grow a pair of wings 411 00:18:17,291 --> 00:18:19,211 and fly over the fence? 412 00:18:19,291 --> 00:18:22,131 You guys leave Spot alone. He's in a lot of pain. 413 00:18:22,208 --> 00:18:24,708 That's it! I'll fly over the fence. 414 00:18:24,792 --> 00:18:27,542 And he's losing his mind. 415 00:18:27,625 --> 00:18:30,705 Ha ha. No. No, I'm not crazy, Leonard. 416 00:18:30,792 --> 00:18:34,382 Not crazy at all. Ha ha ha ha ha. 417 00:18:34,500 --> 00:18:36,210 Ah ha ha ha ha! 418 00:18:36,291 --> 00:18:39,171 Ah ha ha ha ha! 419 00:18:39,250 --> 00:18:43,330 Okay, I can see where the cackling might make you wonder. 420 00:18:43,417 --> 00:18:46,417 Boys, I've got a brilliant plan. 421 00:18:50,542 --> 00:18:52,172 Oh, I get it. 422 00:18:52,250 --> 00:18:54,040 You're warming us up for your brilliant plan 423 00:18:54,125 --> 00:18:57,375 by making us start out with this stupid plan! 424 00:18:57,458 --> 00:19:01,208 Just make sure you lower me on the other side of the fence. 425 00:19:01,291 --> 00:19:03,211 And stop all that licking. 426 00:19:03,291 --> 00:19:04,961 Muddle-headed escape attempts 427 00:19:05,041 --> 00:19:06,961 make me nervous, so sue me. 428 00:19:07,083 --> 00:19:09,543 Can we all stop fighting and do this? 429 00:19:09,625 --> 00:19:11,665 Spot's freedom is at stake. 430 00:19:11,792 --> 00:19:13,832 Yes, and, uh, more importantly, 431 00:19:13,917 --> 00:19:16,707 this harness is starting to ride up. 432 00:19:16,792 --> 00:19:19,502 [high-pitched voice] Let's go! 433 00:19:25,291 --> 00:19:27,461 Hey, what's going on up there? 434 00:19:27,542 --> 00:19:30,502 [coughs] Oh, no. Oh, yuck. 435 00:19:30,625 --> 00:19:32,995 [coughing] Hairball. 436 00:19:33,125 --> 00:19:35,665 I told you to stop licking yourself. 437 00:19:35,750 --> 00:19:37,130 Oh, dear, it's a big one. 438 00:19:37,250 --> 00:19:38,710 That's disgusting. 439 00:19:38,792 --> 00:19:39,672 Oh! 440 00:19:39,792 --> 00:19:42,962 Pretty Boy, stop flapping. 441 00:19:43,041 --> 00:19:45,421 Steady, guys. Steady! 442 00:19:45,542 --> 00:19:47,422 Ah-choo! 443 00:19:47,542 --> 00:19:50,752 Ahh! 444 00:19:53,417 --> 00:19:56,747 -Ugh! [coughs] -Ugh! [coughs] 445 00:19:56,834 --> 00:19:58,884 Here I go again. 446 00:19:58,959 --> 00:20:02,169 I made it, fellas! Your sacrifice was not in vain. 447 00:20:02,250 --> 00:20:05,630 I'm free. Free, I say. Free! 448 00:20:05,709 --> 00:20:08,419 [siren wails] 449 00:20:09,709 --> 00:20:13,129 In future, escape first, celebrate later. 450 00:20:17,166 --> 00:20:20,376 All right, uh... Spot, 451 00:20:20,500 --> 00:20:21,880 come with me, nobody gets hurt. 452 00:20:21,959 --> 00:20:23,499 You leave my dog alone. 453 00:20:23,583 --> 00:20:27,003 Boy, I'm going to have to ask you to stand back! 454 00:20:27,083 --> 00:20:28,503 [tires squeal] 455 00:20:28,625 --> 00:20:30,915 What is going on here? 456 00:20:31,041 --> 00:20:32,041 No need to worry, ma'am. 457 00:20:32,125 --> 00:20:33,745 The subject made an escape attempt, 458 00:20:33,834 --> 00:20:36,134 but Doggy Dyne is on the job. 459 00:20:36,208 --> 00:20:38,378 We're going to take care of him 460 00:20:38,458 --> 00:20:41,378 as soon as your son here gets out of the way. 461 00:20:41,458 --> 00:20:44,828 Leonard, I sent you home sick, honey. 462 00:20:44,917 --> 00:20:47,287 I know, but Spot's my dog. 463 00:20:47,375 --> 00:20:49,205 I just had to come out and defend him. 464 00:20:50,792 --> 00:20:52,462 Mr. Doggy Dyne, this isn't working out. 465 00:20:52,542 --> 00:20:56,132 I want you to take your laser- cyber-detecto things out of here 466 00:20:56,208 --> 00:20:57,708 and let my dog live in peace, 467 00:20:57,834 --> 00:20:59,044 is that clear? 468 00:20:59,166 --> 00:21:00,626 Yeah, but we-- 469 00:21:00,750 --> 00:21:01,920 well, I was only-- 470 00:21:02,000 --> 00:21:03,210 yes, ma'am. 471 00:21:12,083 --> 00:21:13,293 [sighs] 472 00:21:13,375 --> 00:21:15,035 Sweet freedom. 473 00:21:15,542 --> 00:21:17,582 Oh, poor Spot. 474 00:21:17,667 --> 00:21:19,877 I just wanted you to be safe. 475 00:21:19,959 --> 00:21:21,879 Know what, mom? After today, 476 00:21:21,959 --> 00:21:24,879 I don't think Spot will ever try running away again. 477 00:21:24,959 --> 00:21:26,669 [ice cream truck music playing] 478 00:21:26,792 --> 00:21:30,292 Do you feel well enough to have an ice pop? 479 00:21:30,375 --> 00:21:32,625 I think I could handle that. 480 00:21:34,000 --> 00:21:35,920 [groans] 481 00:21:36,000 --> 00:21:40,540 In fact, I think I'm feeling well enough to eat two ice pops. 482 00:21:41,750 --> 00:21:44,580 Now that's a dog's best friend. 483 00:21:44,667 --> 00:21:48,327 Ugh. Smells like rancid pork around here. 484 00:21:48,417 --> 00:21:50,077 Ah ha ha ha ha! 485 00:21:50,208 --> 00:21:53,918 Laugh it up, dog boy. Laugh it up.