1
00:00:00,333 --> 00:00:01,463
Of the leash

2
00:00:01,542 --> 00:00:04,082
-

3
00:00:08,417 --> 00:00:10,127
-

4
00:00:10,208 --> 00:00:11,828
For a pair of pants

5
00:00:11,917 --> 00:00:14,207
His favorite pastime

6
00:00:14,291 --> 00:00:16,581
For the last time

7
00:00:16,667 --> 00:00:18,287
-

8
00:00:28,500 --> 00:00:30,960
Why can't I be a normal kid
like any other?

9
00:00:31,041 --> 00:00:33,131
Now, doodle bug, listen to mother.

10
00:00:35,000 --> 00:00:36,920
I hate dogs.

11
00:00:41,542 --> 00:00:43,502
I do not wish to be a dog.

12
00:00:52,291 --> 00:00:54,131
Yes!

13
00:01:22,667 --> 00:01:26,287
Finally, my salt-and-flour map
of Uruguay is finished.

14
00:01:26,375 --> 00:01:27,665
How does it look?

15
00:01:27,750 --> 00:01:31,210
Uh, I'd say it's
just a dead ringer.

16
00:01:32,291 --> 00:01:34,131
Why does it smell
like Vermont?

17
00:01:34,208 --> 00:01:35,498
I ran out of salt,

18
00:01:35,583 --> 00:01:38,333
so I used Mr. Jolly's
pine-scented cat litter

19
00:01:38,417 --> 00:01:39,747
for the mountains.

20
00:01:39,834 --> 00:01:42,174
No wonder
I was drawn to it!

21
00:01:53,125 --> 00:01:53,955
Ahh!

22
00:01:54,041 --> 00:01:55,881
What a glorious morning!

23
00:01:55,959 --> 00:01:58,579
Unlike Leonard, who waited till
the last minute,

24
00:01:58,667 --> 00:02:01,077
I worked on my map of Argentina
in a timely manner

25
00:02:01,166 --> 00:02:04,076
over the month allotted
for said assignment.

26
00:02:08,083 --> 00:02:10,923
El presidente has entered
the building!

27
00:02:11,000 --> 00:02:13,500
Next to you,
I look like a loser.

28
00:02:13,583 --> 00:02:16,003
Ah, an accurate assessment,
Leonard,

29
00:02:16,083 --> 00:02:17,923
because you're a peasant

30
00:02:18,000 --> 00:02:20,750
while I'm a former Argentinean dictator.

31
00:02:20,834 --> 00:02:22,384
I wish I was a dictator.

32
00:02:22,458 --> 00:02:24,128
We can't all be dictators.

33
00:02:24,208 --> 00:02:25,748
After all, without peasants,

34
00:02:25,834 --> 00:02:28,584
we dictators would have
no one to... dictate to.

35
00:02:28,667 --> 00:02:30,957
Uh, to whom we dictate to.

36
00:02:31,041 --> 00:02:33,171
To whom
which to we dictate to.

37
00:02:33,250 --> 00:02:35,080
Ah, give me a break!

38
00:02:35,166 --> 00:02:36,536
No habla inglés.

39
00:02:45,208 --> 00:02:46,998
Looks like
I'm not the only one

40
00:02:47,083 --> 00:02:49,003
who waited
until the last minute.

41
00:02:50,750 --> 00:02:52,710
Wow!

42
00:02:52,792 --> 00:02:56,422
Careful, Leonard, you'll drool
on Leslie's outfit.

43
00:02:56,500 --> 00:03:00,000
Obviously a costume typical of
carnival in Rio de Janeiro,

44
00:03:00,083 --> 00:03:00,923
Brazil.

45
00:03:01,000 --> 00:03:03,500
Oh, Scott, you're so
knowledgeable...

46
00:03:03,583 --> 00:03:04,673
And so well-dressed!

47
00:03:04,750 --> 00:03:05,920
You must be--

48
00:03:06,000 --> 00:03:07,790
don't tell me.
Let me guess.

49
00:03:07,875 --> 00:03:09,535
Juan Domingo Perón--

50
00:03:09,625 --> 00:03:13,245
Argentine dictator off and on
from 1946 to 1974.

51
00:03:13,333 --> 00:03:14,833
Buena, señorita.

52
00:03:14,917 --> 00:03:16,917
For that, I shall appoint you
head of the treasury.

53
00:03:18,333 --> 00:03:20,923
What do you think of my costume?
I'm a Uruguayan peasant.

54
00:03:21,000 --> 00:03:22,540
Yours?

55
00:03:22,625 --> 00:03:26,665
Uh, well, it's, uh...
Authentic.

56
00:03:28,250 --> 00:03:30,420
Authentic for a loser.

57
00:03:30,500 --> 00:03:32,880
At least he's chosen
to wear a costume.

58
00:03:32,959 --> 00:03:35,879
Hey, soccer is the national
sport of Venezuela.

59
00:03:35,959 --> 00:03:39,079
Besides, I have
a soccer match later today.

60
00:03:39,166 --> 00:03:40,786
What's your excuse, Scott?

61
00:03:40,875 --> 00:03:42,825
You run out of beanie caps?

62
00:03:42,917 --> 00:03:46,497
If you care to address me,
please do so as "sir,"

63
00:03:46,583 --> 00:03:49,383
"your highness," or
"El presidente."

64
00:03:49,458 --> 00:03:51,128
Ooh!

65
00:03:51,208 --> 00:03:52,878
Whoa!

66
00:03:52,959 --> 00:03:54,879
Check out Chelsea and Kelsey.

67
00:03:54,959 --> 00:03:56,499
Ladies, can-can dancers?

68
00:03:56,583 --> 00:03:59,003
The last time I looked,
France was in Europe,

69
00:03:59,083 --> 00:04:00,923
not South America.

70
00:04:01,000 --> 00:04:03,000
-We represent French Guiana.
-We represent French Guiana.

71
00:04:03,083 --> 00:04:05,753
Then, to quote the French,
"touché."

72
00:04:05,834 --> 00:04:08,004
You said "tushie."

73
00:04:08,083 --> 00:04:11,043
Scott said "tushie."

74
00:04:11,125 --> 00:04:15,915
Ah, that can only be the
sardonic wit of Ian Wazselewski.

75
00:04:16,000 --> 00:04:20,040
I'm not Ian.
I'm a llama!

76
00:04:20,125 --> 00:04:22,325
Llamas are native to Peru.

77
00:04:22,417 --> 00:04:23,827
A perfect choice for you,

78
00:04:23,917 --> 00:04:26,417
since llamas are noted
for their ability to spit.

79
00:04:26,500 --> 00:04:27,830
Doofus!

80
00:04:27,917 --> 00:04:30,077
That's not
why I chose Peru!

81
00:04:30,166 --> 00:04:33,876
I did it so I could be close to
the future Mrs. Wazselewski--

82
00:04:33,959 --> 00:04:35,629
Ruth!

83
00:04:35,709 --> 00:04:37,169
Peru and Bolivia share a border

84
00:04:37,250 --> 00:04:41,130
and the largest lake on
the continent, Lake Titicaca.

85
00:04:41,208 --> 00:04:42,128
First of all, let me
congratulate you

86
00:04:42,208 --> 00:04:43,378
for not sniggering

87
00:04:43,458 --> 00:04:45,958
at the mention of the lake
with the unfortunate name.

88
00:04:46,041 --> 00:04:47,211
But more importantly,

89
00:04:47,291 --> 00:04:50,081
that's not why you choose
a country to study, Ian!

90
00:04:50,166 --> 00:04:51,246
Look at Leonard.

91
00:04:51,333 --> 00:04:52,673
He chose Uruguay

92
00:04:52,750 --> 00:04:54,790
because he wanted to learn
more about its people,

93
00:04:54,875 --> 00:04:55,915
its culture, its history.

94
00:04:56,000 --> 00:04:59,670
Not because it's next to...
Leslie Dunkling's Brazil.

95
00:04:59,750 --> 00:05:02,500
Dare I say it again?
Touché.

96
00:05:02,583 --> 00:05:03,753
You said--

97
00:05:03,834 --> 00:05:05,254
not a word, Ian.

98
00:05:05,333 --> 00:05:06,673
All right, class.

99
00:05:06,750 --> 00:05:09,960
I cleared room on this bookcase
for your maps.

100
00:05:10,041 --> 00:05:13,041
Leslie, since Brazil is
the largest country

101
00:05:13,125 --> 00:05:14,165
in South America,

102
00:05:14,250 --> 00:05:16,380
would you bring yours up first?

103
00:05:16,458 --> 00:05:17,958
Look at her map!

104
00:05:18,041 --> 00:05:19,131
Wow!

105
00:05:19,208 --> 00:05:21,288
Look at the spectacular colors,

106
00:05:21,375 --> 00:05:23,125
the verdant green
of the rain forest,

107
00:05:23,208 --> 00:05:25,128
the azure blue
of the Amazon River.

108
00:05:25,208 --> 00:05:27,038
She used colored sugar.

109
00:05:27,125 --> 00:05:28,125
Colored sugar?!

110
00:05:28,208 --> 00:05:30,128
Leonard,
is there a problem?

111
00:05:30,208 --> 00:05:32,828
I thought these were supposed to
be salt-and-flour maps.

112
00:05:32,917 --> 00:05:34,997
I didn't know you could use
colored sugar.

113
00:05:35,083 --> 00:05:38,083
Well, honey, ha ha!
I didn't say you couldn't.

114
00:05:38,166 --> 00:05:39,916
In the words of you young people

115
00:05:40,000 --> 00:05:42,330
and the national security agency,

116
00:05:42,417 --> 00:05:44,077
Leslie thought
"outside the box."

117
00:05:44,166 --> 00:05:46,126
She showed initiative.

118
00:05:46,250 --> 00:05:48,040
Nice going, Leslie.

119
00:05:48,125 --> 00:05:50,535
Way to mess up
the grading curve.

120
00:05:50,625 --> 00:05:52,785
It's really pretty,
Leslie.

121
00:05:52,875 --> 00:05:56,075
Makes me wish we spent every
waking minute on ours, too.

122
00:05:56,166 --> 00:05:57,416
Uh, we?

123
00:05:57,500 --> 00:06:00,130
Excuse me. All you
did was talk on the phone.

124
00:06:00,208 --> 00:06:02,918
People like you
make me so mad!

125
00:06:03,000 --> 00:06:04,960
Okeydokey, everybody.

126
00:06:05,041 --> 00:06:06,581
Let's get our maps up here

127
00:06:06,667 --> 00:06:09,417
and gather
for a snippety-snappy snapshot.

128
00:06:10,875 --> 00:06:12,285
All righty-dighty.

129
00:06:12,375 --> 00:06:15,325
All you south Americans
say "queso!"

130
00:06:15,417 --> 00:06:17,377
Queso!

131
00:06:17,458 --> 00:06:20,128
For my keepsake album.

132
00:06:20,208 --> 00:06:22,998
Like I told my little Leonard--

133
00:06:23,083 --> 00:06:26,003
a picture is like
a little frozen memory.

134
00:06:27,625 --> 00:06:28,995
Recess! Finally!

135
00:06:29,083 --> 00:06:32,583
Oh, oh, after recess, Leslie,
you'll make your presentation,

136
00:06:32,667 --> 00:06:33,997
and then you, Leonard.

137
00:06:34,083 --> 00:06:35,423
Me?
Oh, great.

138
00:06:35,500 --> 00:06:39,210
It's bad enough I have to get up
in front of the whole class,

139
00:06:39,291 --> 00:06:41,831
but there's no way
I can follow Leslie.

140
00:06:41,917 --> 00:06:44,497
Next to hers,
my map looks like garbage.

141
00:06:44,583 --> 00:06:46,173
What did you expect?

142
00:06:46,250 --> 00:06:49,500
You made it out of salt, flour,
cat litter, and garbage.

143
00:06:49,583 --> 00:06:53,883
Ah, it worries me to see
a peon so troubled.

144
00:06:53,959 --> 00:06:57,289
I'm not a peon,
but I am Leonard Helperman,

145
00:06:57,375 --> 00:06:59,125
and I'll always be
Leonard Helperman,

146
00:06:59,208 --> 00:07:01,418
and I'll always get the short
end of the stick.

147
00:07:01,500 --> 00:07:03,960
Exactamente.
No importa.

148
00:07:04,041 --> 00:07:06,581
Why worry about it,
my child?

149
00:07:06,667 --> 00:07:09,957
Qué será será--
what will be will be.

150
00:07:10,041 --> 00:07:11,631
You're right.

151
00:07:11,709 --> 00:07:14,669
There's nothing I can do about
it, so why should I worry?

152
00:07:14,750 --> 00:07:17,080
I'll just do it.
Thanks, El presidente.

153
00:07:17,166 --> 00:07:18,456
I feel better already.

154
00:07:18,542 --> 00:07:20,582
A little advice
from a dictator--

155
00:07:20,667 --> 00:07:22,167
never let them see you sweat.

156
00:07:22,250 --> 00:07:25,170
Oh, right!
I'll be right back.

157
00:07:28,500 --> 00:07:29,830
What's holding up
the line?

158
00:07:29,917 --> 00:07:32,537
Make way for those
thirsting for knowledge.

159
00:07:32,625 --> 00:07:34,785
Leonard!

160
00:07:34,875 --> 00:07:36,575
Aaaah!

161
00:07:36,667 --> 00:07:38,377
My map!

162
00:07:45,750 --> 00:07:47,170
Need I remind you--

163
00:07:47,250 --> 00:07:50,210
the punishment for deliberately
destroying

164
00:07:50,291 --> 00:07:53,541
another student's...

165
00:07:55,792 --> 00:07:59,382
Delicious-- I-I mean,
delicate project,

166
00:07:59,458 --> 00:08:01,918
is no recess until college?

167
00:08:02,000 --> 00:08:04,880
What have I done wrong
to cause my own son

168
00:08:04,959 --> 00:08:08,499
to be accused of destroying
another student's project?!

169
00:08:10,208 --> 00:08:12,288
Mom, I didn't break Leslie's map
of Brazil.

170
00:08:12,375 --> 00:08:13,705
Someone else did.

171
00:08:13,792 --> 00:08:16,712
Oh, really? Didn't you
say-- and I quote--

172
00:08:16,792 --> 00:08:19,582
"Next to hers, my map
looks like garbage"?

173
00:08:19,667 --> 00:08:20,747
Yes.

174
00:08:20,834 --> 00:08:22,384
And at recess,

175
00:08:22,458 --> 00:08:24,538
didn't you say you weren't
worried anymore

176
00:08:24,625 --> 00:08:27,495
because you were going to--
and again I quote-- "do it"?

177
00:08:27,583 --> 00:08:29,003
Yes, but--

178
00:08:29,083 --> 00:08:30,633
and didn't everyone
in your class

179
00:08:30,709 --> 00:08:32,419
see you holding
the broken map?

180
00:08:32,500 --> 00:08:33,630
Yes, but--

181
00:08:33,709 --> 00:08:35,789
motive, opportunity,
witnesses--

182
00:08:35,875 --> 00:08:37,535
yes, sir.

183
00:08:37,625 --> 00:08:41,875
You have to get up pretty early
before morning announcements

184
00:08:41,959 --> 00:08:44,579
to trick
Principal Strickler.

185
00:08:44,667 --> 00:08:47,827
Leonard Helperman, I can't
believe that you, of all people,

186
00:08:47,917 --> 00:08:49,127
would break my map.

187
00:08:49,208 --> 00:08:51,668
I'm gonna hate you
for the rest of my life.

188
00:08:51,750 --> 00:08:52,880
I know it looks bad,

189
00:08:52,959 --> 00:08:54,789
but let me tell you
what happened.

190
00:08:54,875 --> 00:08:57,495
I was coming back from wiping
the sweat off my face

191
00:08:57,583 --> 00:09:00,503
when I saw Leslie's map
was on the floor-- broken.

192
00:09:00,583 --> 00:09:01,833
Aaaah!

193
00:09:01,917 --> 00:09:05,707
So I picked it up thinking
if I could fix it,

194
00:09:05,792 --> 00:09:07,502
Leslie would think
I was a-- a hero.

195
00:09:07,583 --> 00:09:10,463
Oh, Leonard,
you're my hero!

196
00:09:11,458 --> 00:09:13,578
But before I could fix it,
recess ended.

197
00:09:13,667 --> 00:09:15,077
Aaaaah!

198
00:09:15,166 --> 00:09:16,076
Ha!

199
00:09:16,166 --> 00:09:18,626
The patchwork story
of a guilty person.

200
00:09:18,709 --> 00:09:21,579
Do you expect a professional
of my experience

201
00:09:21,667 --> 00:09:22,997
to buy that malarky?

202
00:09:23,083 --> 00:09:24,253
I do!

203
00:09:24,333 --> 00:09:27,173
Not only that, but I'll
prove Leonard is innocent.

204
00:09:27,250 --> 00:09:29,040
How can you possibly
do that?

205
00:09:29,125 --> 00:09:32,325
By becoming the ultimate
detective--

206
00:09:32,417 --> 00:09:35,287
Scottlock Holmes
at your service.

207
00:09:35,375 --> 00:09:39,625
Oh, Scott, if only every boy
could grow up to be like you.

208
00:09:39,709 --> 00:09:44,289
Please do whatever it takes to
save my precious babykins!

209
00:09:44,375 --> 00:09:45,325
Oh oh oh!

210
00:09:45,417 --> 00:09:47,827
Mom!
They're staring at us.

211
00:09:47,917 --> 00:09:50,207
This is a mockery
of the detention process.

212
00:09:50,291 --> 00:09:53,581
You see, my good sir, you
wrongly accuse Leonard

213
00:09:53,667 --> 00:09:56,627
based on hearsay and
circumstantial evidence.

214
00:09:56,709 --> 00:09:58,129
You have no proof.

215
00:09:58,208 --> 00:09:59,708
You, the entire class

216
00:09:59,792 --> 00:10:02,422
saw him holding
the broken map!

217
00:10:02,500 --> 00:10:03,710
Precisely.

218
00:10:03,792 --> 00:10:06,582
We saw him holding
the broken map.

219
00:10:06,667 --> 00:10:09,127
We did not see him
break it.

220
00:10:09,208 --> 00:10:13,578
Well, Mr. Ultimate Detective,
here's an ultimatum--

221
00:10:13,667 --> 00:10:17,747
you have until the end of
the day to prove your case

222
00:10:17,834 --> 00:10:21,674
or it's no recess
until college for babykins.

223
00:10:23,709 --> 00:10:25,129
Thanks for believing me.

224
00:10:25,291 --> 00:10:27,831
One down, and the remainder
of the school to go.

225
00:10:27,917 --> 00:10:30,627
All because I wanted to be
a hero for Leslie.

226
00:10:30,709 --> 00:10:31,789
Now she hates me.

227
00:10:31,875 --> 00:10:34,205
I might as well give up
and plead for mercy.

228
00:10:34,291 --> 00:10:35,501
Fear not, my dear man,

229
00:10:35,583 --> 00:10:39,503
for I have an ability that will
allow me to unravel the mystery

230
00:10:39,583 --> 00:10:40,713
of the broken Brazil.

231
00:10:40,792 --> 00:10:42,582
Your canine sense of smell?

232
00:10:42,667 --> 00:10:44,577
Well,
that goes without saying.

233
00:10:44,667 --> 00:10:47,827
I was referring to deductive
reasoning skills I've acquired

234
00:10:47,917 --> 00:10:50,457
reading all the Sherlock Holmes
mysteries

235
00:10:50,542 --> 00:10:51,882
by sir Arthur Conan Doyle,

236
00:10:51,959 --> 00:10:55,379
my personal favorite being
"The Hound Of The Baskervilles."

237
00:10:55,458 --> 00:10:57,958
So that would make me your
assistant-- Dr. Watson.

238
00:10:58,041 --> 00:11:00,631
Don't stretch, Lenny. You don't
have an advanced degree.

239
00:11:00,709 --> 00:11:02,669
Why, you're barely passing
fourth grade.

240
00:11:02,750 --> 00:11:05,580
Good day,
my good fellows and ladies.

241
00:11:05,667 --> 00:11:09,037
Scottlock Holmes
at your service.

242
00:11:09,125 --> 00:11:10,455
With Mrs. Helperman's
permission,

243
00:11:10,542 --> 00:11:13,042
I am on a quest
to find the party responsible

244
00:11:13,125 --> 00:11:15,495
for Leslie Dunkling's misfortune.

245
00:11:15,583 --> 00:11:18,043
I thought Principal Strickler
said it was Leonard.

246
00:11:18,125 --> 00:11:20,165
Please.
Use your deductive reasoning.

247
00:11:20,250 --> 00:11:21,500
If I thought Leonard did it,

248
00:11:21,583 --> 00:11:23,833
would I be looking
for the person who did?

249
00:11:23,917 --> 00:11:26,497
Well, if it wasn't Leonard,
who else could it be?

250
00:11:26,583 --> 00:11:27,543
We suspect you...

251
00:11:27,625 --> 00:11:30,665
And you... and you--
all of you!

252
00:11:32,166 --> 00:11:34,706
What my assistant is saying
is that until I conduct

253
00:11:34,792 --> 00:11:36,542
a thorough scientific
investigation

254
00:11:36,625 --> 00:11:38,785
which will serve to
eliminate the innocent,

255
00:11:38,875 --> 00:11:41,575
no one is to leave this room!

256
00:11:44,875 --> 00:11:46,915
Hmm.

257
00:11:47,000 --> 00:11:50,880
Chelsea, this morning
when Mrs. H. rewarded me

258
00:11:50,959 --> 00:11:52,579
for outstanding achievement
in class decorum

259
00:11:52,667 --> 00:11:55,327
and selected me
to collect the homework,

260
00:11:55,417 --> 00:11:57,747
I don't recall
picking up your paper.

261
00:12:00,583 --> 00:12:02,833
Would you care to explain?

262
00:12:02,917 --> 00:12:04,667
My hair was a mess.

263
00:12:04,750 --> 00:12:06,880
You're saying looks
are more important to you

264
00:12:06,959 --> 00:12:08,459
than handing in
your homework?!

265
00:12:08,542 --> 00:12:09,582
Duh!

266
00:12:09,667 --> 00:12:11,037
Look at me!

267
00:12:11,125 --> 00:12:13,205
Yet, here it is now!

268
00:12:13,291 --> 00:12:14,921
I submit that...

269
00:12:15,000 --> 00:12:17,630
She snuck it into
the stack during recess.

270
00:12:17,709 --> 00:12:20,329
And that's when she knocked
Leslie's map to the floor.

271
00:12:21,625 --> 00:12:22,825
Okay, I did
the homework thing,

272
00:12:22,917 --> 00:12:25,827
but I didn't break
Leslie's map, really.

273
00:12:25,917 --> 00:12:27,327
It must have been Kelsey.
She was over by the maps.

274
00:12:27,417 --> 00:12:30,787
Me?! What are saying?
You're my best friend!

275
00:12:30,875 --> 00:12:33,915
We swore an oath
on my cd collection!

276
00:12:34,000 --> 00:12:35,670
So you broke
Leslie's map!

277
00:12:35,750 --> 00:12:36,630
No, no, no, no, no!

278
00:12:36,709 --> 00:12:39,459
I was opening the window
to let in some fresh air.

279
00:12:39,542 --> 00:12:41,542
Or did you open the window

280
00:12:41,625 --> 00:12:44,705
to cover up
what you were really doing?

281
00:12:44,792 --> 00:12:45,922
Okay, I admit it.

282
00:12:46,000 --> 00:12:47,790
I didn't want Chelsea
to know

283
00:12:47,875 --> 00:12:50,455
I was putting a note
in Tyler's desk

284
00:12:50,542 --> 00:12:53,082
because Chelsea thinks
Tyler's a dweeb.

285
00:12:53,166 --> 00:12:54,996
That was you
leaving those notes?

286
00:12:55,083 --> 00:12:56,583
I thought you liked Trevor.

287
00:12:56,667 --> 00:12:58,707
Trevor?!
Ugh!

288
00:12:58,792 --> 00:12:59,962
Chelsea's the one
who likes Trevor.

289
00:13:00,041 --> 00:13:01,081
Kelsey!

290
00:13:01,166 --> 00:13:03,996
I'd rather be with Leonard
than Trevor.

291
00:13:04,083 --> 00:13:05,753
I knew somehow
this would come back to me.

292
00:13:05,834 --> 00:13:07,964
Thanks for the humiliation, Chelsea!

293
00:13:08,041 --> 00:13:11,881
But I didn't break the map.
I say Younghee did it.

294
00:13:11,959 --> 00:13:13,419
I saw her moving Leslie's map,

295
00:13:13,500 --> 00:13:14,920
and everyone she was jealous of it.

296
00:13:15,000 --> 00:13:18,000
People like you
make me so mad!

297
00:13:18,083 --> 00:13:19,213
Not so fast.

298
00:13:19,291 --> 00:13:21,881
I believe Younghee
was referring to an incident

299
00:13:21,959 --> 00:13:24,379
that happened earlier
in the morning

300
00:13:24,458 --> 00:13:26,828
when Leslie took cuts
in front of her.

301
00:13:26,917 --> 00:13:29,207
It's like I have a sign
that says,

302
00:13:29,291 --> 00:13:32,211
"take cutsies. I'm a wimp
like Leonard Helperman."

303
00:13:32,291 --> 00:13:34,381
That's why I was mad at Leslie.

304
00:13:34,458 --> 00:13:36,958
And I deduced
the reason you moved Brazil

305
00:13:37,041 --> 00:13:38,631
was to put Chile in the sun

306
00:13:38,709 --> 00:13:42,169
since the capital of Chile,
Santiago, is still wet!

307
00:13:42,250 --> 00:13:45,380
Yes, yes, that's it!
I didn't break Brazil.

308
00:13:45,458 --> 00:13:46,628
Ruth did it.

309
00:13:46,709 --> 00:13:48,289
Wait! I can explain.

310
00:13:48,375 --> 00:13:49,455
No need to.

311
00:13:49,542 --> 00:13:52,292
It's obvious
to the well-trained eye

312
00:13:52,375 --> 00:13:56,455
that you didn't want Bolivia
to be next to Ian's Peru,

313
00:13:56,542 --> 00:13:59,292
so you moved it farther west
to make room for Bolivia.

314
00:13:59,375 --> 00:14:02,325
No! Stop!
Don't accuse Ruth.

315
00:14:02,417 --> 00:14:06,537
I admit it.
It was me! I did it!

316
00:14:07,792 --> 00:14:11,712
So, Ian, you admit you broke
Leslie's map!

317
00:14:11,792 --> 00:14:15,042
Nah, I just wanted Leonard
to get his hopes up.

318
00:14:15,125 --> 00:14:17,375
Everyone knows he did it.

319
00:14:24,625 --> 00:14:26,955
Ha ha ha ha ha ha!

320
00:14:27,041 --> 00:14:28,921
Did you see Leonard's face

321
00:14:29,000 --> 00:14:31,380
when I said I broke
Leslie's map of Brazil?

322
00:14:32,542 --> 00:14:34,332
Am I a riot or what?

323
00:14:34,417 --> 00:14:35,497
Ha ha ha ha!

324
00:14:35,583 --> 00:14:38,833
Thank you, Ian, for sharing your
finely honed sense of humor.

325
00:14:38,917 --> 00:14:40,667
But if it's
not asking too much,

326
00:14:40,750 --> 00:14:43,420
tell us exactly
what you did during recess.

327
00:14:43,500 --> 00:14:48,170
Well, when my beloved Ruth put
Bolivia next to Brazil...

328
00:14:50,500 --> 00:14:54,830
...i put my Peru as close to
Bolivia as I could,

329
00:14:54,917 --> 00:14:58,747
hoping she would want
to form an alliance.

330
00:14:58,834 --> 00:14:59,964
Ew!

331
00:15:02,208 --> 00:15:04,958
Uh, you didn't use paste,
did you, Ian?

332
00:15:05,041 --> 00:15:08,291
No. I can't be trusted
not to eat the paste,

333
00:15:08,375 --> 00:15:09,785
so I had to use glue.

334
00:15:09,875 --> 00:15:13,455
So, you assembled your map
with a glue stick.

335
00:15:13,542 --> 00:15:15,382
And just a skosh
of earwax.

336
00:15:15,458 --> 00:15:16,748
I'll show you.

337
00:15:16,834 --> 00:15:18,004
Eww!

338
00:15:18,083 --> 00:15:19,543
No need for that.

339
00:15:19,625 --> 00:15:23,625
However, I think we understand
why Ruth wanted to move her map.

340
00:15:23,709 --> 00:15:25,789
So, by process of elimination,

341
00:15:25,875 --> 00:15:29,415
I have ruled out Chelsea,
Kelsey, younghee, Ruth,

342
00:15:29,500 --> 00:15:30,830
and Ian as suspects.

343
00:15:30,917 --> 00:15:34,037
We know Leslie didn't do it,
and of course,

344
00:15:34,125 --> 00:15:35,575
I know I didn't do it.

345
00:15:35,667 --> 00:15:39,287
That leaves only one possible
culprit-- Leonard Helperman!

346
00:15:40,542 --> 00:15:42,422
Oops. Heh.
Sorry about that, Leonard.

347
00:15:42,500 --> 00:15:45,170
I thought I had that deductive
reasoning thing down.

348
00:15:45,250 --> 00:15:46,580
Well, back to the drawing board.

349
00:15:46,667 --> 00:15:49,247
Look, "Scottlock," maybe
I should just take the rap

350
00:15:49,333 --> 00:15:51,963
so everybody can go back to
talking to each other.

351
00:15:52,041 --> 00:15:53,881
Cop a plea to appease
the man?! Never!

352
00:15:53,959 --> 00:15:56,499
There's still more here
than meets the eye.

353
00:15:56,583 --> 00:15:57,753
Isn't it a fact, Leslie,

354
00:15:57,834 --> 00:16:00,544
that you went to Leonard's house
to borrow paste?

355
00:16:00,625 --> 00:16:02,415
Well, yes.

356
00:16:02,500 --> 00:16:05,380
I ran out while I was gluing
down the rain forest.

357
00:16:05,458 --> 00:16:07,668
So I went to see
if Leonard had any extra.

358
00:16:10,583 --> 00:16:13,423
But how did you know?
No one was there but Spot.

359
00:16:13,500 --> 00:16:15,210
Uh, that smudge on your shoe--

360
00:16:15,291 --> 00:16:19,461
it consists of dog hair, cat
fur, and bird droppings,

361
00:16:19,542 --> 00:16:20,752
the combination of which

362
00:16:20,834 --> 00:16:22,714
could only be found on
the Helperman welcome mat!

363
00:16:22,792 --> 00:16:26,172
He's right. Oh, he is good.

364
00:16:26,250 --> 00:16:28,000
I didn't break my own map.

365
00:16:28,083 --> 00:16:31,503
No, but you have provided me
with the final clue

366
00:16:31,583 --> 00:16:33,383
to break this case wide open!

367
00:16:33,458 --> 00:16:37,168
Mrs. Helperman, if you summon
Principal Strickler,

368
00:16:37,250 --> 00:16:39,460
I will reveal the true culprit.

369
00:16:39,542 --> 00:16:42,252
Well,
tell me who did it,

370
00:16:42,333 --> 00:16:44,793
and the full weight
of the public school system

371
00:16:44,875 --> 00:16:47,745
will come crashing down
on their head.

372
00:16:47,834 --> 00:16:51,084
Leslie's map was broken by...

373
00:16:51,166 --> 00:16:53,626
No one... and everyone.

374
00:16:53,709 --> 00:16:56,539
Excuse me? Is this supposed
to be a joke?

375
00:16:56,625 --> 00:16:58,915
No. It would have been a joke
if I had said, "knock knock,"

376
00:16:59,000 --> 00:17:00,710
and you would have said,
"who's there?"

377
00:17:00,792 --> 00:17:02,502
Enough!
I get the point.

378
00:17:02,583 --> 00:17:03,883
Just explain to me

379
00:17:03,959 --> 00:17:06,499
why I can't ban
Leonard Helperman from recess

380
00:17:06,583 --> 00:17:07,963
till college!

381
00:17:08,041 --> 00:17:10,461
To do that, let me take
everyone back in time

382
00:17:10,542 --> 00:17:12,292
to the scene of the crime--

383
00:17:12,375 --> 00:17:15,625
not literally, of course, but
verbally and with visual aids.

384
00:17:15,709 --> 00:17:18,709
Chelsea snuck back in to replace
her missing homework

385
00:17:18,792 --> 00:17:20,462
while Kelsey opened a window

386
00:17:20,542 --> 00:17:23,002
to cover her slipping a note
in Tyler's desk.

387
00:17:23,083 --> 00:17:25,673
Younghee moved Brazil to
the edge of the shelf

388
00:17:25,750 --> 00:17:28,460
so Santiago, the capital
of Chile, could dry.

389
00:17:28,542 --> 00:17:31,382
Then Ruth, smelling Ian's Peru,
moved her Bolivia,

390
00:17:31,458 --> 00:17:32,578
pushing Leslie's Brazil

391
00:17:32,667 --> 00:17:34,997
partially over the edge
of the shelf.

392
00:17:35,000 --> 00:17:37,420
And, finally,
Ian countered Ruth's move

393
00:17:37,500 --> 00:17:39,630
by placing his earwax-glued map
of Peru

394
00:17:39,709 --> 00:17:41,829
on the shelf
above Leslie's Brazil!

395
00:17:41,917 --> 00:17:45,747
Each of these acts by themselves
didn't break Leslie's map,

396
00:17:45,834 --> 00:17:48,924
but put together in a bizarre
chain of events...

397
00:17:49,000 --> 00:17:49,960
Yes, yes!

398
00:17:51,542 --> 00:17:52,582
With the window open,
Ian's earwax dried,

399
00:17:52,667 --> 00:17:56,377
his Lake Titicaca toppled
into Leslie's rain forest.

400
00:17:56,458 --> 00:17:58,578
Because it wasn't glued down,
it rolled down her map,

401
00:17:58,667 --> 00:18:00,627
causing Brazil to fall
over the edge!

402
00:18:02,834 --> 00:18:04,084
I don't buy it.

403
00:18:04,166 --> 00:18:07,376
What kind of a school principal
do you think I am?

404
00:18:07,458 --> 00:18:10,538
Elementary, my dear principal,
elementary.

405
00:18:10,625 --> 00:18:13,325
Either you show me
one shred of solid evidence

406
00:18:13,417 --> 00:18:15,787
to support
your cockamamie theory,

407
00:18:15,875 --> 00:18:19,245
or it'll be no recess until
college for both of you.

408
00:18:19,333 --> 00:18:21,173
Is that elementary enough?

409
00:18:21,250 --> 00:18:24,210
Evidence? Yeah, that's it.
Of course.

410
00:18:24,291 --> 00:18:25,331
You expect evidence.

411
00:18:25,417 --> 00:18:27,247
But that's what
I wanted you to say

412
00:18:27,333 --> 00:18:29,713
because you don't need evidence
because--

413
00:18:29,792 --> 00:18:31,422
if you remember
anything, kid,

414
00:18:31,500 --> 00:18:33,580
now would be the time
to speak up.

415
00:18:33,667 --> 00:18:35,377
The picture my mom took.

416
00:18:35,458 --> 00:18:36,538
Oh, here it is.

417
00:18:39,291 --> 00:18:42,671
My dear sir, here is
all the proof you need

418
00:18:42,750 --> 00:18:46,540
thanks to my trusty assistant,
Dr. Helperman.

419
00:18:46,625 --> 00:18:49,165
I think your saving my tushie
was worth conferring upon you

420
00:18:49,250 --> 00:18:50,540
an honorary
doctorate degree.

421
00:18:50,625 --> 00:18:53,535
Ha ha!
You said "tushie" again.

422
00:18:53,750 --> 00:18:56,130
Note the original positions
of the maps

423
00:18:56,208 --> 00:18:58,578
and the closed window
before recess,

424
00:18:58,667 --> 00:19:02,077
as opposed to the open window
and new positions of the maps.

425
00:19:02,166 --> 00:19:04,126
Hmm.

426
00:19:07,792 --> 00:19:08,922
I suppose...

427
00:19:09,000 --> 00:19:11,580
And if you look closely
at the desk legs,

428
00:19:11,667 --> 00:19:13,377
you'll see splatters of sugar

429
00:19:13,458 --> 00:19:15,918
that match the color
of Lake Titicaca.

430
00:19:16,000 --> 00:19:17,460
Not a word, Ian.

431
00:19:17,542 --> 00:19:18,882
Hey!

432
00:19:18,959 --> 00:19:21,459
But there aren't any
on Leonard's pants leg,

433
00:19:21,542 --> 00:19:24,462
ergo, he was not near Brazil
when it fell to the floor.

434
00:19:28,041 --> 00:19:30,751
I'm sorry for thinking
you broke my map, Leonard.

435
00:19:32,750 --> 00:19:34,000
Oh, that's okay, Leslie.

436
00:19:34,083 --> 00:19:36,333
I mean, even I would have
thought I did it.

437
00:19:36,417 --> 00:19:37,537
Uh, I mean if I saw myself

438
00:19:37,625 --> 00:19:39,455
standing over
your busted Brazil--

439
00:19:39,542 --> 00:19:40,672
I mean, not that I...

440
00:19:40,750 --> 00:19:43,250
Accept her apology
and close your mouth.

441
00:19:43,333 --> 00:19:44,543
Right.

442
00:19:44,625 --> 00:19:46,955
Thanks, Leslie. I'm just glad
this nightmare is over.

443
00:19:47,041 --> 00:19:49,331
For you, maybe...

444
00:19:49,417 --> 00:19:50,707
but wait just a minute.

445
00:19:50,792 --> 00:19:53,712
There's something else
revealed in this picture.

446
00:19:53,792 --> 00:19:57,632
A final act that led to the
destruction of Leslie's Brazil.

447
00:20:01,542 --> 00:20:03,962
The Amazon river
in the photograph

448
00:20:04,041 --> 00:20:05,881
stretches its entire distance.

449
00:20:05,959 --> 00:20:07,709
This Amazon river does not.

450
00:20:08,959 --> 00:20:11,169
You're right. So?

451
00:20:11,250 --> 00:20:13,880
So, someone else was
in the room during recess,

452
00:20:13,959 --> 00:20:16,539
someone who has
a penchant for sweets,

453
00:20:16,625 --> 00:20:19,325
someone who licked off
6 centimeters of sugar--

454
00:20:19,417 --> 00:20:21,207
enough to lighten Leslie's map

455
00:20:21,208 --> 00:20:23,538
so when her rain forest
rolled forward,

456
00:20:23,625 --> 00:20:25,375
it would fall to the floor.

457
00:20:25,458 --> 00:20:27,998
You keep saying "someone."
Who is it?!

458
00:20:28,083 --> 00:20:31,673
Someone who keeps sugar-filled
candy straws in his desk.

459
00:20:33,291 --> 00:20:37,631
Principal Strickler, don't you
think we deserve the true story?

460
00:20:37,709 --> 00:20:39,959
You mean I--

461
00:20:40,041 --> 00:20:44,791
Oh, no, the shame!

462
00:20:44,875 --> 00:20:46,125
I was on my way

463
00:20:46,208 --> 00:20:49,378
to monitor playground activity
during recess

464
00:20:49,458 --> 00:20:51,328
when I saw the sugar maps.

465
00:20:51,417 --> 00:20:55,207
The Amazon river, that long
flowing ribbon of blue sugar.

466
00:20:55,291 --> 00:20:57,461
I couldn't stop myself.

467
00:21:01,875 --> 00:21:05,415
Okay, okay, I have a weakness
for colored-sugar candy.

468
00:21:05,500 --> 00:21:07,670
I've had it
ever since I was a kid.

469
00:21:07,750 --> 00:21:09,460
But I had no idea my craving

470
00:21:09,542 --> 00:21:12,502
was involved in the bizarre
chain of events

471
00:21:12,583 --> 00:21:14,793
that eventually broke
Leslie's map!

472
00:21:14,875 --> 00:21:17,665
I see now I was wrong
to accuse Leonard.

473
00:21:17,750 --> 00:21:21,540
And so in the words of
Scottlock Holmes,

474
00:21:21,625 --> 00:21:25,165
"I apologize to everyone
and no one."

475
00:21:25,250 --> 00:21:27,670
Apology accepted,
Principal Strickler.

476
00:21:27,750 --> 00:21:29,130
Right, class?

477
00:21:31,583 --> 00:21:34,253
Ha ha ha! Why don't we get
right to the lesson?

478
00:21:34,333 --> 00:21:36,463
The lesson, if I may,
Mrs. H.,

479
00:21:36,542 --> 00:21:39,382
is that false accusations
lead to injustice.

480
00:21:39,458 --> 00:21:42,128
For in this great land of ours,

481
00:21:42,208 --> 00:21:44,128
every man is innocent
until proven guilty.

482
00:21:44,208 --> 00:21:47,418
History is replete with the
names of the wrongly accused--

483
00:21:47,500 --> 00:21:49,500
Sacco and Vanzetti,
Alfred Dreyfus,

484
00:21:49,583 --> 00:21:50,963
Rubin Hurricane Carter,

485
00:21:51,041 --> 00:21:54,791
and to which we can now add
the name of Leonard Helperman.

486
00:21:54,875 --> 00:21:57,205
Songs by over-the-hill singers
will extol Leonard's innocence.

487
00:21:57,291 --> 00:21:58,291
Scott!

488
00:21:58,375 --> 00:21:59,495
Huh?

489
00:21:59,583 --> 00:22:01,173
The lesson I had in mind

490
00:22:01,250 --> 00:22:03,170
was your reports
on South America.

491
00:22:03,250 --> 00:22:04,420
Principal Strickler,

492
00:22:04,500 --> 00:22:07,170
we'd be pleased as punch
to have you stay and listen.

493
00:22:07,250 --> 00:22:08,380
Principal Strickler?