1 00:00:00,333 --> 00:00:01,463 ♪ Born on the wrong end Of the leash ♪ 2 00:00:01,542 --> 00:00:04,082 -♪ He was a dreamer ♪ -♪ And a little schemer ♪ 3 00:00:04,166 --> 00:00:05,786 ♪ A nutty mutt living a dog's life ♪ 4 00:00:05,875 --> 00:00:07,415 ♪ But when he'd hear the bell for school ♪ 5 00:00:07,500 --> 00:00:08,330 ♪ He'd start to drool ♪ 6 00:00:08,417 --> 00:00:10,127 -♪ One day he says ♪ -♪ I'll take a chance ♪ 7 00:00:10,208 --> 00:00:11,828 ♪ Trades his leash For a pair of pants ♪ 8 00:00:11,917 --> 00:00:14,207 ♪ In a glance, school becomes His favorite pastime ♪ 9 00:00:14,291 --> 00:00:16,581 ♪ I have buried a bone For the last time ♪ 10 00:00:16,667 --> 00:00:18,287 -♪ He says ♪ -♪ I want to be a boy ♪ 11 00:00:18,375 --> 00:00:19,625 ♪ Ooh, he's bad ♪ 12 00:00:19,709 --> 00:00:21,129 ♪ He's so over just being rover ♪ 13 00:00:21,208 --> 00:00:22,578 ♪ I gotta be a boy ♪ 14 00:00:22,667 --> 00:00:25,037 ♪ He says he's just gonna be a boy ♪ 15 00:00:25,125 --> 00:00:26,665 ♪ Turns out he's a regular Einstein ♪ 16 00:00:26,750 --> 00:00:28,420 ♪ And Leonard is treading a fine line ♪ 17 00:00:28,500 --> 00:00:30,960 Why can't I be a normal kid like any other? 18 00:00:31,041 --> 00:00:33,131 Now, doodle bug, listen to mother. 19 00:00:33,208 --> 00:00:34,918 ♪ I want to be a boy ♪ 20 00:00:35,000 --> 00:00:36,920 I hate dogs. 21 00:00:37,000 --> 00:00:39,460 ♪ I gotta be a boy ♪ 22 00:00:39,542 --> 00:00:41,462 ♪ This power pup's gonna be a boy ♪ 23 00:00:41,542 --> 00:00:43,502 I do not wish to be a dog. 24 00:00:43,583 --> 00:00:46,083 ♪ Now this bowser's ready for trousers ♪ 25 00:00:46,166 --> 00:00:47,496 ♪ I got to be a boy ♪ 26 00:00:47,583 --> 00:00:49,083 ♪ His nose is wet but you can bet ♪ 27 00:00:49,166 --> 00:00:52,206 ♪ This teacher's pet is gonna be a boy ♪ 28 00:00:52,291 --> 00:00:54,131 Yes! 29 00:01:10,500 --> 00:01:14,210 The word is "antidisestablishmentarianism." 30 00:01:14,291 --> 00:01:20,291 A-L-M-A-Z-Z-R-I-I-T... 31 00:01:20,417 --> 00:01:23,247 Z-M. 32 00:01:23,333 --> 00:01:27,583 The word is still "antidisestablishmentarianism." 33 00:01:30,041 --> 00:01:36,041 A-N-T-I-D-I-S-E-S-T-A-B-L-I-S-H- M-E-N-T-A-R-I-A-N-I-S-M. 34 00:01:37,333 --> 00:01:38,253 Correct! 35 00:01:38,333 --> 00:01:39,173 [cheering] 36 00:01:39,959 --> 00:01:42,669 Congratulations, Scott Leadready II. 37 00:01:42,750 --> 00:01:45,670 You are hereby proclaimed champion speller 38 00:01:45,750 --> 00:01:48,330 of Fala D. Roosevelt Elementary School 39 00:01:48,417 --> 00:01:52,247 and our representative at this year's county spelling bee! 40 00:01:52,333 --> 00:01:55,543 I am? Oh, joy of joys! 41 00:01:55,625 --> 00:01:58,665 I'm king of the universe! 42 00:01:58,750 --> 00:02:01,670 I was robbed by the man! 43 00:02:03,166 --> 00:02:04,826 What do you see there, my boy? 44 00:02:04,917 --> 00:02:07,497 Uh, a dead spider being carted away 45 00:02:07,583 --> 00:02:08,753 by a bunch of ants? 46 00:02:08,834 --> 00:02:09,674 [blows] Now what do you see? 47 00:02:11,083 --> 00:02:13,633 I see an empty trophy case, sir. 48 00:02:13,709 --> 00:02:15,789 That's right, son, and the reason it's empty 49 00:02:15,875 --> 00:02:18,455 is because that darned West East Westland Elementary 50 00:02:18,542 --> 00:02:19,922 always beats us. 51 00:02:20,000 --> 00:02:23,040 And my rival principal there, Nash Brickler, 52 00:02:23,125 --> 00:02:26,535 never misses an opportunity to rub it in my face. 53 00:02:26,625 --> 00:02:28,625 [imitating Brickler] Sorry we took first place again, Crosby, 54 00:02:29,959 --> 00:02:33,129 while you were tied for last-- with the school for losers! 55 00:02:33,208 --> 00:02:36,168 But this time, we're gonna show Nash Brickler 56 00:02:36,250 --> 00:02:37,540 that we can bring home 57 00:02:37,625 --> 00:02:40,625 that glorious second place trophy at last. 58 00:02:40,709 --> 00:02:42,629 Why not first place? 59 00:02:42,709 --> 00:02:44,289 Eric Mark Krabitz is why-- 60 00:02:44,375 --> 00:02:47,375 the best speller in the history of this school district, 61 00:02:47,458 --> 00:02:50,078 maybe any school district-- he's never been beat. 62 00:02:50,166 --> 00:02:54,286 Well, sir, blow a little more dust off the old trophy shelf, 63 00:02:54,375 --> 00:02:57,745 because Eric Mark Krabitz has just met his match! 64 00:02:57,834 --> 00:03:01,674 Can it be true? Do you really mean... 65 00:03:06,542 --> 00:03:08,632 Hello? West East Westland Elementary. 66 00:03:08,709 --> 00:03:11,539 Home of the Spelling Spartans. Nash Brickler speaking. 67 00:03:11,625 --> 00:03:13,625 Hey, Brickler, spell this-- "runner-up"! 68 00:03:13,709 --> 00:03:16,669 As in second best! As in lo-o-o-ser! 69 00:03:16,750 --> 00:03:17,580 [hangs up] 70 00:03:18,208 --> 00:03:20,998 Hello? Hello? Darn kids! 71 00:03:23,041 --> 00:03:23,881 [snoring] 72 00:03:25,583 --> 00:03:27,213 Oh, Pretty Boy. 73 00:03:27,291 --> 00:03:29,211 Hmm? 74 00:03:30,375 --> 00:03:31,535 Guess what time it is? 75 00:03:31,625 --> 00:03:33,665 Time to give the person who woke me up such a zets 76 00:03:33,750 --> 00:03:35,460 it'll give his whole family a headache?! 77 00:03:35,542 --> 00:03:37,632 Ta-da! 78 00:03:37,709 --> 00:03:38,919 You disturbed my beauty rest 79 00:03:39,000 --> 00:03:40,880 to show me a glockenspiel on wheels?! 80 00:03:40,959 --> 00:03:43,379 No. [dings] 81 00:03:43,458 --> 00:03:46,498 I disturbed your beauty rest because you said it would be 82 00:03:46,583 --> 00:03:49,463 a hot day in December before you'd give me singing lessons. 83 00:03:49,542 --> 00:03:50,712 Remember? 84 00:03:50,792 --> 00:03:51,922 Yeah. So what? 85 00:03:56,583 --> 00:03:57,503 Huh? 86 00:03:57,583 --> 00:04:00,253 Well, I figure if we start today, 87 00:04:00,333 --> 00:04:03,083 I could have "The Tiny Flugelhorn Girl" 88 00:04:03,166 --> 00:04:05,246 down pat in time for Christmas. 89 00:04:05,333 --> 00:04:07,543 That'll teach me to make stupid promises 90 00:04:07,625 --> 00:04:09,825 without consulting "The Farmer's Almanac"... 91 00:04:09,917 --> 00:04:12,917 But I am a bird of my word, so let's get started. 92 00:04:13,000 --> 00:04:13,830 [dinging] 93 00:04:15,417 --> 00:04:16,247 [inhales, clears throat] 94 00:04:17,166 --> 00:04:19,416 [caterwauling] 95 00:04:25,417 --> 00:04:28,037 Apparently that's [clears throat] not my key. 96 00:04:28,125 --> 00:04:31,375 Pretty Boy, Mr. Jolly... I have news. 97 00:04:31,458 --> 00:04:34,748 Before you stands the next county spelling champion! 98 00:04:34,834 --> 00:04:36,544 That'll win you a lot of popularity contests. 99 00:04:36,625 --> 00:04:39,325 Well, that's all very nice for you, spot, 100 00:04:39,417 --> 00:04:40,877 but I have news of my own. 101 00:04:40,959 --> 00:04:43,539 Pretty Boy has agreed to teach me how to sing. 102 00:04:43,625 --> 00:04:45,075 Silence! 103 00:04:45,166 --> 00:04:47,626 From now on, you will only use your instrument 104 00:04:47,709 --> 00:04:49,789 when I tell you and how I tell you! 105 00:04:49,875 --> 00:04:51,455 Yes, maestro. 106 00:04:51,542 --> 00:04:53,632 I said, "silence"! 107 00:04:53,709 --> 00:04:55,539 -[dings] -[humming] 108 00:04:55,625 --> 00:04:56,875 [caterwauling] 109 00:04:57,542 --> 00:04:58,962 -[dings] -[humming] 110 00:04:59,041 --> 00:04:59,961 [caterwauling] 111 00:05:02,959 --> 00:05:04,499 Look what I got-- 112 00:05:04,583 --> 00:05:07,133 the word list from last year's county spelling bee. 113 00:05:07,208 --> 00:05:08,498 Lenny, my naive friend, 114 00:05:08,583 --> 00:05:10,793 by the time you get to the county bee level, 115 00:05:10,875 --> 00:05:12,915 you're not studying the list anymore. 116 00:05:13,041 --> 00:05:15,331 So you know every word on this list? 117 00:05:15,417 --> 00:05:17,627 Duh, yeah. 118 00:05:17,709 --> 00:05:19,129 "Hors d'oeuvres"? 119 00:05:19,208 --> 00:05:20,668 Two words-- silent "h," 120 00:05:20,750 --> 00:05:22,830 apostrophe between the "d" and the "o." 121 00:05:22,917 --> 00:05:23,787 [caterwauling continues] 122 00:05:24,709 --> 00:05:26,289 Um, "misspell." 123 00:05:26,375 --> 00:05:29,575 Leonard, your attempt at irony is cute-- really, it is-- 124 00:05:29,667 --> 00:05:32,497 but they don't let you go to the county spelling bee 125 00:05:32,583 --> 00:05:34,833 if you're gonna M-I-S-S-P-E-L-L "misspell." 126 00:05:34,917 --> 00:05:37,037 So you're just gonna hang out and do nothing? 127 00:05:37,125 --> 00:05:38,375 No, Leonard! 128 00:05:38,458 --> 00:05:40,958 I'm going to do what every great champion does-- 129 00:05:41,041 --> 00:05:43,041 take full measure of my opponent, 130 00:05:43,125 --> 00:05:45,915 study his every move so that he cannot take a step 131 00:05:46,000 --> 00:05:47,670 without me taking it first, 132 00:05:47,750 --> 00:05:50,630 and then, when I know him better than he knows himself, 133 00:05:50,709 --> 00:05:52,039 attack and win the bee! 134 00:05:52,125 --> 00:05:52,955 [caterwauling] 135 00:05:53,583 --> 00:05:56,133 Now would you two knock it off with the glockenspiel?! 136 00:05:56,208 --> 00:05:57,668 [glockenspiel dings] 137 00:06:12,542 --> 00:06:13,582 It sure was a lucky coincidence 138 00:06:13,667 --> 00:06:15,667 that Principal Strickler decided to give us 139 00:06:15,750 --> 00:06:18,420 Fala D. Roosevelt's birthday off from school this year. 140 00:06:18,500 --> 00:06:21,580 Otherwise, we wouldn't be able to spy on this Krabitz kid. 141 00:06:21,667 --> 00:06:22,997 Okay, here's the plan-- 142 00:06:23,083 --> 00:06:25,003 first, we study the enemy's moves 143 00:06:25,083 --> 00:06:26,543 in his academic environment. 144 00:06:26,625 --> 00:06:29,625 I still think you should study the list from last year. 145 00:06:29,709 --> 00:06:31,329 I laugh at last year's list. 146 00:06:31,417 --> 00:06:34,127 The key to victory lies not in some old list, 147 00:06:34,208 --> 00:06:35,998 but in the mind of one's enemy. 148 00:06:36,083 --> 00:06:37,633 Watch and learn. 149 00:06:45,125 --> 00:06:47,705 Ah, there he is-- the hated rival. 150 00:06:47,792 --> 00:06:52,042 Eric Mark Krabitz, you are mine. 151 00:06:52,125 --> 00:06:54,415 Okay, now you're creeping me out. 152 00:06:58,709 --> 00:07:00,829 [all snickering] 153 00:07:05,667 --> 00:07:09,327 Look at that focus! The kid's amazing! 154 00:07:09,417 --> 00:07:10,997 Look at them laughing. 155 00:07:12,625 --> 00:07:14,745 The kid's a dork. 156 00:07:19,083 --> 00:07:21,083 Right field! Look up, Krabitz! 157 00:07:21,166 --> 00:07:22,326 What's wrong with you?! 158 00:07:22,417 --> 00:07:24,377 Come on, Krabitz, look up. 159 00:07:24,458 --> 00:07:25,788 Fascinating. 160 00:07:26,709 --> 00:07:29,539 -Aw, Krabitz! -Aw, man! 161 00:07:52,709 --> 00:07:54,459 Behold, Leonard... 162 00:07:54,542 --> 00:07:57,792 The lion in his den. 163 00:07:57,875 --> 00:07:59,665 I'm pretty sure that's the kitchen. 164 00:07:59,750 --> 00:08:02,380 That's not what I-- oh, never mind! 165 00:08:02,458 --> 00:08:04,708 Follow me. 166 00:08:06,750 --> 00:08:08,580 Darn it! Where'd he go? 167 00:08:08,667 --> 00:08:11,537 I don't know, but he sure seems lonely. 168 00:08:11,625 --> 00:08:13,665 Yeah-- lonely like a shark! 169 00:08:18,750 --> 00:08:20,000 Aah! 170 00:08:20,083 --> 00:08:22,633 Who are you two, and why have you been following me all day? 171 00:08:22,709 --> 00:08:24,039 [nervously] Oh, uh, hi, there, Eric Mark, 172 00:08:25,250 --> 00:08:27,170 or do you prefer just Eric-- 173 00:08:27,250 --> 00:08:29,580 or-- or just Mark-- or maybe Mr. Krabitz? 174 00:08:29,667 --> 00:08:32,077 I'd prefer that you just tell me what's going on here. 175 00:08:32,166 --> 00:08:34,536 Yes, of course you would. It's quite simple, really. 176 00:08:34,625 --> 00:08:36,575 What's going on is, uh, 177 00:08:36,667 --> 00:08:39,577 that my friend and I are huge fans of yours 178 00:08:39,667 --> 00:08:42,667 and passionate devotees of "The Bee," 179 00:08:42,750 --> 00:08:44,460 and, well, we wanted to-- 180 00:08:44,542 --> 00:08:46,832 that is, we were hoping that we could, you know, 181 00:08:46,917 --> 00:08:49,457 get to know you a little bit-- you know, hang out. 182 00:08:49,542 --> 00:08:51,832 Really? You want to hang out with me? 183 00:08:51,917 --> 00:08:54,127 Do we? Oh, we sure do! 184 00:08:54,208 --> 00:08:55,708 Don't we? 185 00:08:55,792 --> 00:08:57,712 Oh, absolutely. 186 00:08:57,792 --> 00:09:00,672 Well, um, I guess that would be okay. 187 00:09:00,750 --> 00:09:02,290 So, what are your names? 188 00:09:02,375 --> 00:09:03,415 My name's-- 189 00:09:03,500 --> 00:09:07,790 his name's Ian Wazselewski, and I'm Yung-Hi Mandelbaum. 190 00:09:07,875 --> 00:09:09,705 So come on in. I'll show you around. 191 00:09:09,792 --> 00:09:14,792 Welcome to my world. What do you think? 192 00:09:14,875 --> 00:09:16,125 It's incredible. 193 00:09:16,208 --> 00:09:18,878 No, "incredible" doesn't do it justice. 194 00:09:18,959 --> 00:09:21,079 It's-- it's really... Good. 195 00:09:21,166 --> 00:09:23,076 Oh, why won't the words come?! 196 00:09:23,166 --> 00:09:26,036 What I'm trying to say is it's-- it's... 197 00:09:26,125 --> 00:09:28,875 Incogitable? Insupposable? Unfathomable? 198 00:09:28,959 --> 00:09:31,169 Yes, yes, and yes! 199 00:09:31,250 --> 00:09:34,500 How about you, Ian? Do you like it? 200 00:09:34,583 --> 00:09:37,633 Eric Mark asked if you like his room, Ian. 201 00:09:37,709 --> 00:09:41,669 Oh, yeah, right. Uh, it's, uh, neat. 202 00:09:41,750 --> 00:09:42,920 Say, I have an idea. 203 00:09:43,000 --> 00:09:45,420 How about a rousing game of Aramaic anagrams? 204 00:09:49,208 --> 00:09:52,628 So, Eric Mark, if I may be so bold... 205 00:09:52,709 --> 00:09:55,249 What's your secret? I mean, how do you always win? 206 00:09:55,333 --> 00:09:57,833 The first thing I do is study the list from previous bees. 207 00:09:57,917 --> 00:10:00,537 I mean, you'd have to be an idiot not to do that, right? 208 00:10:00,625 --> 00:10:01,915 Oh-ho, of course. 209 00:10:02,000 --> 00:10:03,830 But what sets me apart is my knowledge of 210 00:10:03,917 --> 00:10:06,417 secondary languages like Gaelic, Swahili-- even Navajo-- 211 00:10:06,500 --> 00:10:07,880 and the subtle nuances 212 00:10:07,959 --> 00:10:09,959 of letter-slash-word correlations that provides-- 213 00:10:10,041 --> 00:10:12,501 in addition, of course, to being fluent in Latin and Greek. 214 00:10:12,583 --> 00:10:14,633 And here I thought it would be something complicated. 215 00:10:14,709 --> 00:10:16,379 So, what do you do for fun? 216 00:10:16,458 --> 00:10:18,668 What do you mean? Ian. 217 00:10:18,750 --> 00:10:21,210 I mean fun-- you know, playing, watching TV, riding bikes. 218 00:10:21,291 --> 00:10:22,711 That kind of stuff. 219 00:10:22,792 --> 00:10:25,502 Ian, you're being rude! 220 00:10:25,583 --> 00:10:26,753 No, it's okay. 221 00:10:26,834 --> 00:10:30,044 The answer is simple-- fun is a luxury I can't afford. 222 00:10:30,125 --> 00:10:33,785 To be a true champion of the bee requires total dedication. 223 00:10:33,875 --> 00:10:36,285 So you never play? 224 00:10:36,375 --> 00:10:37,325 Never. 225 00:10:37,417 --> 00:10:40,577 Eric Mark Krabitz, you are a shining star, 226 00:10:40,667 --> 00:10:44,077 a supernova in a universe of flashlights! 227 00:10:46,542 --> 00:10:48,582 Thanks for coming over, Yung-Hi and Ian. 228 00:10:48,667 --> 00:10:50,997 I hope you can make it to the county championship 229 00:10:51,083 --> 00:10:52,963 to watch me destroy the competition. 230 00:10:53,041 --> 00:10:54,631 Yes, well, I'll try to make it. 231 00:10:54,709 --> 00:10:57,959 Although, you never know-- I might be sick that day. 232 00:10:58,041 --> 00:11:01,541 Did you hear that, Leonard? He's going to destroy me. 233 00:11:01,625 --> 00:11:04,125 Oh, I'm sorry, Yung-hi, were you talking to me? 234 00:11:07,291 --> 00:11:08,291 [Native-American music plays] 235 00:11:09,333 --> 00:11:12,713 The kid speaks Navajo, for crying out loud. 236 00:11:12,792 --> 00:11:15,582 The only people who speak Navajo are Navajos... 237 00:11:15,667 --> 00:11:17,167 And Eric Mark Krabitz. 238 00:11:17,250 --> 00:11:19,630 He isn't human, I tell ya-- of course, neither am I-- 239 00:11:19,709 --> 00:11:21,539 but that's not the point! 240 00:11:21,625 --> 00:11:24,245 Oh, why did I waste all those years eating and breathing 241 00:11:24,333 --> 00:11:26,923 and talking when I should have been studying spelling?! 242 00:11:27,000 --> 00:11:29,830 Because you're normal, and normal kids-- and dogs-- 243 00:11:29,917 --> 00:11:32,627 are supposed to have fun every now and then, 244 00:11:32,709 --> 00:11:35,669 not spend every minute of every day studying spelling. 245 00:11:35,750 --> 00:11:39,670 You're right, I am normal-- too normal-- but not anymore! 246 00:11:39,750 --> 00:11:43,500 From now on I'm going to be abnormal like Krabitz! 247 00:11:43,583 --> 00:11:45,833 Now, nobody talk! I must think! 248 00:11:45,917 --> 00:11:46,747 [squeaking] 249 00:11:47,709 --> 00:11:48,539 [gasps] 250 00:11:48,834 --> 00:11:49,674 [dings] 251 00:11:50,375 --> 00:11:53,375 All right, that's it! Enough with the glockenspiel! 252 00:11:53,417 --> 00:11:55,577 From now on, this glockenspiel ceases to exist! 253 00:11:55,667 --> 00:11:57,247 I am taking this glockenspiel 254 00:11:57,333 --> 00:11:59,583 and dragging it into the garbage can 255 00:11:59,667 --> 00:12:01,287 on the hard drive of my mind. 256 00:12:01,417 --> 00:12:04,077 You are hereby erased from my memory forever! 257 00:12:07,041 --> 00:12:08,631 The pooch has finally flipped. 258 00:12:08,709 --> 00:12:10,789 I heard that. 259 00:12:12,667 --> 00:12:14,627 Okay, we'll start with this, 260 00:12:14,709 --> 00:12:17,499 beginning with "a" and working our way to "z." 261 00:12:17,583 --> 00:12:20,043 Boy, it's a good thing we followed Krabitz around all day. 262 00:12:20,125 --> 00:12:21,825 Otherwise you would have never come up 263 00:12:21,917 --> 00:12:23,457 with that "A to Z" thing. 264 00:12:23,542 --> 00:12:27,462 Ah, sarcasm-- the last refuge of a meager mind. 265 00:12:27,542 --> 00:12:29,462 Blah, blah, blah. Let's get started. 266 00:12:29,542 --> 00:12:31,462 The first word is "aardvark." 267 00:12:31,542 --> 00:12:34,632 Aardvark. A-A-R-D-V... 268 00:12:34,709 --> 00:12:35,499 [clock ticking] 269 00:12:36,750 --> 00:12:39,500 Abscissa. Hmm. Word form? 270 00:12:39,583 --> 00:12:40,503 Noun. 271 00:12:40,583 --> 00:12:42,753 -Origin? -Latin. 272 00:12:42,834 --> 00:12:45,714 What do you mean you're not gonna help me anymore?! 273 00:12:45,792 --> 00:12:48,672 I told you-- this is stupid. We're still on the As! 274 00:12:48,750 --> 00:12:50,580 You're already a great speller, 275 00:12:50,667 --> 00:12:53,667 and I'm not gonna lock myself in a room day after day, 276 00:12:53,750 --> 00:12:56,920 wasting my life, so you can try to win a stupid spelling bee! 277 00:12:57,000 --> 00:12:58,540 Try to win? 278 00:12:58,625 --> 00:13:02,165 I'm not going to try to win, I'm going to win! 279 00:13:02,250 --> 00:13:04,330 I will win! I must win! 280 00:13:04,417 --> 00:13:06,627 [classical music plays] 281 00:13:17,333 --> 00:13:19,003 Ha ha ha! 282 00:13:24,375 --> 00:13:26,575 [snoring] 283 00:13:29,667 --> 00:13:32,497 Look at him-- sleeping up there all snuggly-wuggly. 284 00:13:32,583 --> 00:13:35,213 You know who sleeps at night? Losers, that's who! 285 00:13:35,291 --> 00:13:37,291 Well, we'll see how well you sleep 286 00:13:37,375 --> 00:13:38,915 when I'm champion of the world, 287 00:13:39,000 --> 00:13:41,960 and you're just a big old sleepyheaded loser, Krabitz! 288 00:13:42,041 --> 00:13:44,961 No, wait-- you're not Krabitz. You're that other one. 289 00:13:45,041 --> 00:13:45,881 [snoring] 290 00:13:47,417 --> 00:13:50,077 Mr. Chowszelewski. 291 00:13:50,166 --> 00:13:53,456 The word is "frascalhasa-apso." 292 00:13:53,542 --> 00:13:55,582 Frascalhasa-apso. 293 00:13:55,667 --> 00:13:58,167 That is so cinchy. 294 00:13:58,250 --> 00:14:01,210 Okay, frascalhasa-apso. 295 00:14:01,291 --> 00:14:07,331 F-R-A-S-C-A-L-H-A-S-A-hyphen- 296 00:14:07,542 --> 00:14:09,422 A-P-S-O! 297 00:14:09,500 --> 00:14:10,830 That is correct! 298 00:14:10,917 --> 00:14:11,747 [cheering and barking] 299 00:14:12,917 --> 00:14:15,077 Mr. Helperschnauzer. 300 00:14:15,166 --> 00:14:16,746 The word is... 301 00:14:16,834 --> 00:14:19,584 On second thought, fetch! 302 00:14:19,667 --> 00:14:20,497 [cheering and barking] 303 00:14:21,625 --> 00:14:27,415 Eric Mutt Krabitz, your word is "crustadinglycacapoo." 304 00:14:27,500 --> 00:14:28,330 [barking] 305 00:14:31,291 --> 00:14:32,131 [whimpers] 306 00:14:33,458 --> 00:14:36,328 Absolutely correct, Mr. Krabitz! 307 00:14:36,417 --> 00:14:38,627 Now your turn, Mr. Leadready-- 308 00:14:38,709 --> 00:14:40,579 if that's even your real name. 309 00:14:40,667 --> 00:14:42,957 The word is "cat." 310 00:14:43,041 --> 00:14:44,501 "Cat"?! 311 00:14:44,583 --> 00:14:46,793 I thought we were just doing bizarre dog words! 312 00:14:46,875 --> 00:14:48,915 I mean, "cat" wasn't even on the list! 313 00:14:49,000 --> 00:14:50,790 Did you study your Navajo? 314 00:14:50,875 --> 00:14:51,995 Navajo?! 315 00:14:52,083 --> 00:14:54,923 Oh, no! Say it ain't so! 316 00:14:55,000 --> 00:14:56,130 [chanting] Loser! Loser! Loser... 317 00:14:57,375 --> 00:14:59,455 I'm not a loser. I'm not a loser. 318 00:14:59,542 --> 00:15:04,462 I'm not a loser...Not a loser. A loser. Loser. Loser. 319 00:15:04,542 --> 00:15:06,792 Hey, wake up, boy. You're having a bad dream. 320 00:15:06,875 --> 00:15:09,875 Huh?! What?! A dream?! Oh, thank goodness. 321 00:15:09,959 --> 00:15:11,959 Oh, Leonard, it was horrible. 322 00:15:12,041 --> 00:15:13,961 Everyone knew how to spell except me. 323 00:15:14,041 --> 00:15:17,041 You were a dog, and-- and not a very attractive one at that. 324 00:15:17,125 --> 00:15:19,785 Holy consonant clusters, look at the time! 325 00:15:19,875 --> 00:15:21,745 We've got to get to the bee! 326 00:15:21,834 --> 00:15:23,754 Now, remember, son, 327 00:15:23,834 --> 00:15:26,214 you're not just spelling for yourself anymore. 328 00:15:26,291 --> 00:15:28,381 You're spelling for the hopes and dreams 329 00:15:28,458 --> 00:15:30,748 of every man, woman, and child in East Westland. 330 00:15:30,834 --> 00:15:34,254 You're spelling for all the kids who don't understand 331 00:15:34,333 --> 00:15:37,463 why sometimes "o-u" sounds like "ow" as in "cloud" 332 00:15:37,542 --> 00:15:40,462 and other times sounds like "oh" as in "dough," 333 00:15:40,542 --> 00:15:43,792 and then other times it sounds like "uh" as in "tough," 334 00:15:43,875 --> 00:15:46,495 and don't even get me started on "g-h"! 335 00:15:46,583 --> 00:15:49,503 I get the idea, sir. That was very inspiring. 336 00:15:49,583 --> 00:15:52,293 Now go out there and win us a trophy 337 00:15:52,375 --> 00:15:54,625 for our sad little trophy case. 338 00:15:54,709 --> 00:15:56,539 Well, well, Crosby! 339 00:15:56,625 --> 00:15:58,575 Back for another try, eh? 340 00:15:58,667 --> 00:15:59,497 [bitterly] Hello, Nash. 341 00:16:00,750 --> 00:16:02,380 Listen, you may have a hard time 342 00:16:02,458 --> 00:16:04,208 holding onto that last-place title. 343 00:16:04,291 --> 00:16:06,381 I hear the competition is pretty stiff-- 344 00:16:06,458 --> 00:16:07,878 at the bottom this year! 345 00:16:07,959 --> 00:16:09,629 [laughs] 346 00:16:12,083 --> 00:16:16,713 Well, well, well, if it isn't my old friend Yung-Hi Mandelbaum. 347 00:16:16,792 --> 00:16:18,922 What happened? Did you change your name? 348 00:16:19,000 --> 00:16:20,580 Eric Mark. I, uh... 349 00:16:20,667 --> 00:16:22,627 Can it, Leadready-- I knew what you wanted all along. 350 00:16:22,709 --> 00:16:24,539 Do you think you're the first person 351 00:16:24,625 --> 00:16:25,785 to pretend to be my friend 352 00:16:25,875 --> 00:16:27,455 just so they could steal my spelling secrets? 353 00:16:27,542 --> 00:16:29,632 Well, actually... yeah. 354 00:16:29,709 --> 00:16:31,629 Okay, so maybe you are. So what?! 355 00:16:31,709 --> 00:16:34,629 Did you really think I'd share my precious secrets 356 00:16:34,709 --> 00:16:36,749 with a couple of yutzes off the street? 357 00:16:36,834 --> 00:16:40,634 I gave you nothing! Ha ha ha ha ha ha! 358 00:16:40,709 --> 00:16:44,379 From this moment on, there is only myself and the word. 359 00:16:44,458 --> 00:16:46,708 [cheering] 360 00:16:49,792 --> 00:16:51,462 Ladies and gentlemen, 361 00:16:51,542 --> 00:16:55,132 welcome to this year's county spelling bee championship. 362 00:16:55,208 --> 00:16:58,628 Please welcome your spelling finalists. 363 00:16:58,709 --> 00:16:59,539 [cheers and applause] 364 00:17:00,583 --> 00:17:04,713 All righty, then. Let the bee begin! 365 00:17:08,458 --> 00:17:11,828 No! No! No! No! 366 00:17:11,917 --> 00:17:13,627 It's a note! 367 00:17:13,709 --> 00:17:16,039 Just one lousy meshugeneh note! 368 00:17:16,125 --> 00:17:18,455 How hard is it to hum a single note?! 369 00:17:18,542 --> 00:17:19,502 -[dings] -Can't you hear that?! 370 00:17:20,750 --> 00:17:21,670 -[dings] -I'm playing this... 371 00:17:22,583 --> 00:17:23,633 -[dongs] -And you're singing this! 372 00:17:24,083 --> 00:17:24,923 [meows] 373 00:17:26,583 --> 00:17:27,383 [dings] 374 00:17:27,709 --> 00:17:28,539 [meows] Heh heh. 375 00:17:30,000 --> 00:17:31,500 Of course! That's it! 376 00:17:31,583 --> 00:17:34,423 You're a one-note kitty, a b-flat cat. 377 00:17:34,500 --> 00:17:36,580 I'm a genius! Now we can get to work! 378 00:17:36,667 --> 00:17:39,747 You'll have your "Tiny Flugelhorn Girl" by Christmas. 379 00:17:47,375 --> 00:17:50,205 The word is "perspicacious." 380 00:17:50,291 --> 00:17:56,041 Perspicacious. P-E-R-S-P-I-C-A-C-I-O-U-S. 381 00:17:56,125 --> 00:17:57,825 Perspicacious. 382 00:17:57,917 --> 00:17:58,827 Correct. 383 00:17:58,917 --> 00:17:59,747 [cheering] 384 00:18:00,709 --> 00:18:04,129 [no audio] 385 00:18:17,125 --> 00:18:21,285 Philately. P-H-I-L-A-T-E-L-Y. 386 00:18:21,375 --> 00:18:22,495 Philately. 387 00:18:22,583 --> 00:18:24,423 That is correct! 388 00:18:24,500 --> 00:18:26,880 I can't wait till they get to the hard words. 389 00:18:26,959 --> 00:18:29,959 Neither can I, cause there's 26 letters in the alphabet, 390 00:18:30,041 --> 00:18:32,041 and I know 'em all. 391 00:18:32,125 --> 00:18:35,035 Mr. Leadready, your word is... 392 00:18:35,125 --> 00:18:36,915 "Glockenspiel." 393 00:18:37,000 --> 00:18:38,210 [nervously] Homina-homina-homina. 394 00:18:39,625 --> 00:18:41,455 Come again. 395 00:18:41,542 --> 00:18:43,422 Glockenspiel. 396 00:18:43,500 --> 00:18:46,460 Glockenspiel. Okay, let's see... 397 00:18:46,542 --> 00:18:49,172 "I before e, except after c" unless it's in German. 398 00:18:49,250 --> 00:18:51,460 Or is it Lithuanian? Oh, that can't be right! 399 00:18:51,542 --> 00:18:53,632 Do Lithuanians even have "i" in their alphabet? 400 00:18:53,709 --> 00:18:56,419 Come on, Leadready, think! 401 00:18:56,500 --> 00:18:57,330 [dings] 402 00:18:57,834 --> 00:18:58,884 [buzzes] 403 00:19:01,208 --> 00:19:02,038 [cheering] 404 00:19:03,750 --> 00:19:07,290 Way to go! Second place! That is so cool! 405 00:19:07,375 --> 00:19:11,375 Congratulations, son. You've made us all very proud. 406 00:19:11,458 --> 00:19:13,538 For the first time in history, 407 00:19:13,625 --> 00:19:16,535 we have a trophy to put in our case. 408 00:19:16,625 --> 00:19:19,375 And Leonard and I would love to take you out 409 00:19:19,458 --> 00:19:22,498 for a special second-place celebratory pizza at Mario's. 410 00:19:22,583 --> 00:19:25,333 Well, Leonard, I hope you've learned something from all this. 411 00:19:25,417 --> 00:19:26,537 Me? 412 00:19:26,625 --> 00:19:29,415 For though we may strive for perfection, that, my friend, 413 00:19:29,500 --> 00:19:31,420 is a goal as elusive as a dream... 414 00:19:31,500 --> 00:19:33,420 -But-- -And it is surely the fool 415 00:19:33,500 --> 00:19:36,250 who holds himself to an unattainable standard. 416 00:19:36,333 --> 00:19:39,543 If you'll all excuse me, I have some congratulating to do. 417 00:19:39,625 --> 00:19:40,995 Eric Mark, wait! 418 00:19:41,083 --> 00:19:42,503 What do you want? 419 00:19:42,583 --> 00:19:46,213 I-I just wanted to say congratulations, so... 420 00:19:46,291 --> 00:19:47,671 Congratulations. 421 00:19:47,750 --> 00:19:50,040 And also, I-- I wanted to apologize 422 00:19:50,125 --> 00:19:52,575 for pretending to be somebody else. 423 00:19:52,667 --> 00:19:53,997 Normally I'm very much 424 00:19:54,083 --> 00:19:57,503 a "what you see is what you get" kind of dog-- uh, kid. 425 00:19:57,583 --> 00:20:00,543 It's kind of flattering that you went to all that trouble-- 426 00:20:00,625 --> 00:20:03,205 you know, in a way-over-the-top, obsessive sort of way. 427 00:20:03,291 --> 00:20:06,461 Yeah...hey, my friend and I are going to Mario's for pizza. 428 00:20:06,542 --> 00:20:08,042 You wanna come? 429 00:20:08,125 --> 00:20:10,075 Are you saying you want to hang out with me-- 430 00:20:10,166 --> 00:20:12,456 like friends or something, no strings attached-- 431 00:20:12,542 --> 00:20:14,882 and you're not just trying to steal my spelling secrets? 432 00:20:14,959 --> 00:20:17,879 That's exactly what I'm saying, Mr. Paranoid, so how about it? 433 00:20:17,959 --> 00:20:20,959 Well, I was going to go home and start preparing for the states, 434 00:20:21,041 --> 00:20:22,461 but, ah, what the heck! 435 00:20:22,542 --> 00:20:23,962 Whoo-hoo! 436 00:20:24,041 --> 00:20:25,921 You big goofball. 437 00:20:26,000 --> 00:20:28,830 Ooh, here they come! 438 00:20:28,917 --> 00:20:30,877 Okay, now remember what we worked on. 439 00:20:30,959 --> 00:20:34,329 From the diaphragm. Round tones. Joyous sound. 440 00:20:34,417 --> 00:20:35,957 [nervously] Round tones. Joyous sounds. Got it. 441 00:20:36,625 --> 00:20:38,375 Ooh, I'm so nervous! 442 00:20:38,458 --> 00:20:42,578 Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah! Hoo hoo! 443 00:20:42,667 --> 00:20:43,497 [howls] 444 00:20:45,125 --> 00:20:47,245 Oh, yes, I am da man! 445 00:20:47,333 --> 00:20:49,633 Scott Leadready II rules! 446 00:20:49,709 --> 00:20:51,829 Don't tell me you actually won that spelling bee?! 447 00:20:51,917 --> 00:20:53,497 No, I lost the spelling bee, 448 00:20:53,583 --> 00:20:56,633 but I challenged Krabitz to a pizza-eating contest 449 00:20:56,709 --> 00:20:58,579 and destroyed him! 450 00:20:58,667 --> 00:21:00,577 The poor kid never had a chance. 451 00:21:00,667 --> 00:21:03,327 Oh, yeah! I'm the king, baby! Ha ha! 452 00:21:03,417 --> 00:21:06,457 He's almost as gracious in victory as he is in defeat. 453 00:21:06,542 --> 00:21:09,082 Uh, w-we have a surprise of our own. 454 00:21:09,166 --> 00:21:11,536 Now, understand, this is just a work in progress, 455 00:21:11,625 --> 00:21:14,495 but, still, I think you're gonna be pleasantly surprised. 456 00:21:14,583 --> 00:21:15,423 [glockenspiel plays] 457 00:21:16,000 --> 00:21:19,460 ♪ In the tiny town of Flugelhorn ♪ 458 00:21:19,542 --> 00:21:22,502 ♪ One shining Christmas morn ♪ 459 00:21:22,583 --> 00:21:25,463 ♪ A child received a magic gift ♪ 460 00:21:25,542 --> 00:21:28,712 ♪ A tiny golden flugelhorn ♪ 461 00:21:28,792 --> 00:21:31,832 ♪ She'd never seen a flugelhorn ♪ 462 00:21:31,917 --> 00:21:34,787 ♪ Its sound she did not know ♪ 463 00:21:34,875 --> 00:21:38,575 ♪ And yet she raised it to her lips ♪ 464 00:21:38,667 --> 00:21:41,537 ♪ And just began to blow ♪ 465 00:21:41,625 --> 00:21:44,915 ♪ With your horn so bright and bugley ♪ 466 00:21:45,000 --> 00:21:48,130 ♪ Play your song of Christmas cheer ♪ 467 00:21:48,208 --> 00:21:51,668 ♪ Make the sound so sweet and flugely ♪ 468 00:21:51,750 --> 00:21:54,630 ♪ For all Flugelites to he-e-e-ar ♪ 469 00:21:54,709 --> 00:21:55,539 [flugelhorn plays] 470 00:21:59,667 --> 00:22:02,247 Well, what do you think? 471 00:22:02,333 --> 00:22:04,383 That was lovely. Really. 472 00:22:04,458 --> 00:22:06,538 You're both to be congratulated... 473 00:22:06,625 --> 00:22:09,205 Except for one tiny, little detail-- 474 00:22:09,291 --> 00:22:13,751 I hate G-L-O-C-K-E-N-S-P-I-E-L-S!