1 00:00:00,354 --> 00:00:01,479 ♪ Born on the wrong end Of the leash ♪ 2 00:00:01,563 --> 00:00:04,104 -♪ He was a dreamer ♪ -♪ And a little schemer ♪ 3 00:00:04,187 --> 00:00:05,813 ♪ A nutty mutt living a dog's life ♪ 4 00:00:05,896 --> 00:00:07,438 ♪ But when he'd hear the bell for school ♪ 5 00:00:07,521 --> 00:00:08,354 ♪ He'd start to drool ♪ 6 00:00:08,438 --> 00:00:10,146 -♪ One day he says ♪ -♪ I'll take a chance ♪ 7 00:00:10,229 --> 00:00:11,855 ♪ Trades his leash For a pair of pants ♪ 8 00:00:11,938 --> 00:00:14,229 ♪ In a glance, school becomes His favorite pastime ♪ 9 00:00:14,312 --> 00:00:16,604 ♪ I have buried a bone For the last time ♪ 10 00:00:16,688 --> 00:00:18,312 -♪ He says ♪ -♪ I want to be a boy ♪ 11 00:00:18,396 --> 00:00:19,646 ♪ Ooh, he's bad ♪ 12 00:00:19,730 --> 00:00:21,146 ♪ He's so over just being rover ♪ 13 00:00:21,229 --> 00:00:22,604 ♪ I gotta be a boy ♪ 14 00:00:22,688 --> 00:00:25,062 ♪ It's so weird ♪ ♪ He says he's just gonna be a boy ♪ 15 00:00:25,146 --> 00:00:26,896 ♪ Turns out he's a regular Einstein ♪ 16 00:00:26,980 --> 00:00:28,396 ♪ And Leonard is treading a fine line ♪ 17 00:00:28,521 --> 00:00:30,980 Why can't I be a normal kid like any other? 18 00:00:31,062 --> 00:00:33,146 Now, doodle bug, listen to mother. 19 00:00:33,229 --> 00:00:34,938 ♪ I want to be a boy ♪ 20 00:00:35,021 --> 00:00:36,938 I hate dogs. 21 00:00:37,021 --> 00:00:39,479 ♪ I gotta be a boy ♪ 22 00:00:39,563 --> 00:00:41,479 ♪ This power pup's gonna be a boy ♪ 23 00:00:41,563 --> 00:00:43,312 I do not wish to be a dog. 24 00:00:43,396 --> 00:00:45,896 ♪ Now this bowser's ready for trousers ♪ 25 00:00:45,980 --> 00:00:47,312 ♪ I got to be a boy ♪ 26 00:00:47,396 --> 00:00:48,938 ♪ His nose is wet but you can bet ♪ 27 00:00:49,021 --> 00:00:52,062 ♪ This teacher's pet is gonna be a boy ♪ 28 00:00:52,146 --> 00:00:52,938 Yes! 29 00:01:12,187 --> 00:01:16,896 [narrator] They say the best is a constantly moving target. 30 00:01:16,980 --> 00:01:18,646 Good as someone may be at something, 31 00:01:18,730 --> 00:01:21,104 there's always another someone somewhere 32 00:01:21,187 --> 00:01:23,062 preparing to take the title away. 33 00:01:23,563 --> 00:01:27,062 And sometimes that someone is not the one you'd expect. 34 00:01:28,396 --> 00:01:31,855 Mashed potatoes with gravy. 35 00:01:31,938 --> 00:01:34,646 Is there any food combination so sweet, 36 00:01:34,730 --> 00:01:36,187 aside from mashed potatoes with honey 37 00:01:36,271 --> 00:01:39,312 or mashed potatoes with fructose or dextrose 38 00:01:39,396 --> 00:01:42,104 or maltose or any of those other-toses? 39 00:01:42,187 --> 00:01:44,271 [laughs] I think not. 40 00:01:45,438 --> 00:01:48,521 She didn't make a dent in the top of my potatoes again. 41 00:01:48,604 --> 00:01:51,438 Hmm, must be inexperienced in the gravy arts. 42 00:01:51,521 --> 00:01:53,229 Oh, she knows. 43 00:01:53,312 --> 00:01:54,521 She hates me. 44 00:01:54,604 --> 00:01:56,604 She usually waits until I pass 45 00:01:56,688 --> 00:01:58,688 before she brings out the fresh enchiladas. 46 00:02:02,146 --> 00:02:03,354 What are you guys doing? 47 00:02:03,438 --> 00:02:06,187 We're, like, flipping cards. Duh. 48 00:02:06,271 --> 00:02:07,771 I've seen this game. 49 00:02:07,855 --> 00:02:09,688 The object is to toss a baseball card 50 00:02:09,771 --> 00:02:11,771 closest to the center of the circle. 51 00:02:11,980 --> 00:02:13,312 I want to play. 52 00:02:13,396 --> 00:02:15,146 Got any cards? 53 00:02:16,604 --> 00:02:18,730 Okay, you're after Teddy. 54 00:02:18,813 --> 00:02:21,146 And there's the toss by Teddy the ace. 55 00:02:21,479 --> 00:02:24,271 Outside. Next up, Helperman. 56 00:02:29,646 --> 00:02:30,688 Not even close. 57 00:02:30,771 --> 00:02:33,354 Taylor the player is next. 58 00:02:35,980 --> 00:02:38,813 And Taylor the player wins the cards. 59 00:02:40,396 --> 00:02:41,855 I want a nickname, too. 60 00:02:41,938 --> 00:02:44,479 You can't, like, just have one. 61 00:02:44,563 --> 00:02:47,271 You got to be good first, like us. 62 00:02:47,354 --> 00:02:50,521 If I can't have a nickname, then I don't want to play anymore. 63 00:02:50,604 --> 00:02:52,312 Okay, don't play. 64 00:02:52,396 --> 00:02:54,438 Not our fault you're no good. 65 00:02:54,521 --> 00:02:56,646 [laughter] 66 00:02:58,938 --> 00:03:00,938 Scott, want to play? 67 00:03:01,021 --> 00:03:02,896 Eh... nah. 68 00:03:02,980 --> 00:03:04,980 I'm gonna have lunch with Leonard. 69 00:03:06,229 --> 00:03:09,312 Getting better. That one stayed in the room. 70 00:03:09,396 --> 00:03:12,146 I could practice forever, and I still wouldn't be good. 71 00:03:12,229 --> 00:03:13,688 I'm not good at anything. 72 00:03:13,771 --> 00:03:16,354 Oh, don't say that, bunkie. 73 00:03:16,438 --> 00:03:18,312 You're good at a lot of things. 74 00:03:18,396 --> 00:03:19,438 Name one. 75 00:03:19,521 --> 00:03:22,438 Well... you're good at being my master. 76 00:03:22,521 --> 00:03:25,438 You're the best master I ever had. 77 00:03:25,521 --> 00:03:27,229 I'm the only master you ever had. 78 00:03:27,312 --> 00:03:30,021 Well, sure, if we're gonna get into semantics. 79 00:03:30,104 --> 00:03:31,896 Far be it for me to pass judgment, 80 00:03:31,980 --> 00:03:34,354 but if you're gonna be the best at something, 81 00:03:34,479 --> 00:03:36,479 let's be happy it isn't at this card game. 82 00:03:36,563 --> 00:03:38,396 And why's that, pray tell? 83 00:03:38,479 --> 00:03:40,021 Gambling is evil. 84 00:03:40,104 --> 00:03:43,229 If one gambles, one will eventually lose one's shirt. 85 00:03:43,312 --> 00:03:46,438 Actually, the game at school is not gambling. 86 00:03:46,521 --> 00:03:49,604 There's no chance involved here. It's pure skill. 87 00:03:49,688 --> 00:03:52,521 Let me show you how to handle cards, Lenny boy. 88 00:03:52,604 --> 00:03:54,312 The important moves are palming 89 00:03:54,396 --> 00:03:57,354 and dealing from the bottom of the deck. 90 00:03:57,438 --> 00:04:00,187 He's tossing baseball cards. How's that gonna help him? 91 00:04:00,271 --> 00:04:01,354 It won't. 92 00:04:01,438 --> 00:04:03,521 I just wanted to show off my moves. 93 00:04:03,604 --> 00:04:05,396 Cards are an art, you know? 94 00:04:05,479 --> 00:04:07,062 Please. 95 00:04:07,146 --> 00:04:09,604 A skill, perhaps, but an art? I don't think so. 96 00:04:09,688 --> 00:04:13,271 Look at this house of cards I built. 97 00:04:13,354 --> 00:04:15,438 Ah...ah...ah-choo! 98 00:04:15,521 --> 00:04:18,604 Excuse me. 99 00:04:23,021 --> 00:04:24,479 How'd you do that? 100 00:04:24,563 --> 00:04:26,354 I'll give you a hint-- look at my paw. 101 00:04:26,438 --> 00:04:28,271 What is it you have that I don't? 102 00:04:28,354 --> 00:04:29,229 Soap? 103 00:04:29,312 --> 00:04:30,187 A thumb. 104 00:04:30,271 --> 00:04:32,396 You can toss cards better without a thumb? 105 00:04:32,479 --> 00:04:34,146 Don't look so surprised. 106 00:04:34,229 --> 00:04:36,146 You humans are so conceited 107 00:04:36,229 --> 00:04:39,104 with that opposable-appendage thing of yours. 108 00:04:39,187 --> 00:04:40,896 Here. 109 00:04:40,980 --> 00:04:43,146 Hold the card between your fingers, like this. 110 00:04:43,229 --> 00:04:45,229 Good. Now move your wrist with a downward tug 111 00:04:45,312 --> 00:04:47,104 as it leaves your hand. 112 00:04:47,187 --> 00:04:49,479 Aaah! 113 00:04:51,312 --> 00:04:53,146 You flipped before you twisted. 114 00:04:53,229 --> 00:04:55,312 There's too many things to remember. 115 00:04:55,396 --> 00:04:58,688 Let me see if I can explain it clearer. 116 00:05:01,354 --> 00:05:05,146 ♪ I'll teach you how to toss the Cards with lots of skill now ♪ 117 00:05:05,229 --> 00:05:07,896 ♪ The secret, Leonard, Is in the wrist motion ♪ 118 00:05:07,980 --> 00:05:11,229 ♪ A little bit of spin As it leaves the hands now ♪ 119 00:05:11,312 --> 00:05:14,104 ♪ You'll get cards to sail Across the ocean ♪ 120 00:05:14,187 --> 00:05:17,104 ♪ The way I hold the card Is important to see ♪ 121 00:05:17,187 --> 00:05:20,187 ♪ Remember that the thumb is the enemy ♪ 122 00:05:20,271 --> 00:05:25,312 ♪ The best way is to hold The card with fingers 2 and 3 ♪ 123 00:05:25,396 --> 00:05:27,771 Like this. 124 00:05:27,980 --> 00:05:30,438 ♪ You got to hold the card right ♪ 125 00:05:30,521 --> 00:05:33,104 ♪ Not too loose, not too tight ♪ 126 00:05:33,187 --> 00:05:36,396 No, wait. That's close. Like that. 127 00:05:36,479 --> 00:05:39,271 Don't let your thumbs hold you back. 128 00:05:39,354 --> 00:05:42,855 ♪ As Leonard throws the cards, I'll explain how it works now ♪ 129 00:05:42,938 --> 00:05:46,062 Thanks, Mr. Jolly. You had to make me stick around. 130 00:05:46,146 --> 00:05:48,688 A current of air keeps the card from dropping down. 131 00:05:48,771 --> 00:05:50,396 This is great. 132 00:05:50,479 --> 00:05:52,396 Learning physics from a pet, huh? 133 00:05:52,479 --> 00:05:55,104 ♪ Based on principles we cannot see ♪ 134 00:05:55,187 --> 00:05:58,104 ♪ The air flows over surfaces steadily ♪ 135 00:05:58,187 --> 00:06:02,104 It's all based-- it's based on the work of bernoulli. 136 00:06:02,187 --> 00:06:05,062 Bernoulli? Who the heck is that guy? 137 00:06:05,146 --> 00:06:08,187 Bernoulli, who the heck is that guy? 138 00:06:08,271 --> 00:06:11,021 Bernoulli, who the heck is that guy? 139 00:06:11,104 --> 00:06:14,187 A smart guy back in 1738 140 00:06:14,271 --> 00:06:17,312 who found that all air flows at a certain rate. 141 00:06:17,396 --> 00:06:21,021 Quiet! Quiet! I'm trying to concentrate. 142 00:06:21,104 --> 00:06:23,646 ♪ Wow, Leonard's Really getting good now ♪ 143 00:06:23,730 --> 00:06:26,938 ♪ Wow, Leonard's Really getting good now ♪ 144 00:06:30,062 --> 00:06:31,521 Tomorrow I'll show everybody 145 00:06:31,604 --> 00:06:33,604 that I'm the best card tosser in the world. 146 00:06:47,980 --> 00:06:49,813 This is a Roman amphitheater. 147 00:06:49,896 --> 00:06:52,438 The construction methods are typical of the time. 148 00:06:52,521 --> 00:06:55,730 Because the arches are round at the top-- see right there-- 149 00:06:55,813 --> 00:06:58,771 the weight is distributed equally across all the columns. 150 00:06:58,855 --> 00:07:00,187 See? 151 00:07:00,271 --> 00:07:02,062 Waste of time-- that's what I see. 152 00:07:02,187 --> 00:07:03,980 I am expressing myself. 153 00:07:04,062 --> 00:07:06,271 This is no different than painting or sculpting 154 00:07:06,354 --> 00:07:08,271 or gluing little seashells together 155 00:07:08,354 --> 00:07:10,187 to make lovely gift statues. 156 00:07:10,271 --> 00:07:11,980 Maybe you're right. 157 00:07:12,062 --> 00:07:14,646 Let me check out those support columns. 158 00:07:16,312 --> 00:07:17,938 Aaah! 159 00:07:18,062 --> 00:07:19,604 You did that on purpose. 160 00:07:19,688 --> 00:07:22,730 Guess I'm just a bull in a China shop. 161 00:07:30,813 --> 00:07:31,730 Yeah! 162 00:07:31,813 --> 00:07:33,604 I want to play again. 163 00:07:33,688 --> 00:07:35,604 Just two cards? This'll be quick. 164 00:07:35,688 --> 00:07:38,312 [Scott] I wouldn't be so sure, gentlemen. 165 00:07:38,396 --> 00:07:40,271 I've been giving Leonard some tips. 166 00:07:40,354 --> 00:07:41,813 Prepare to be impressed. 167 00:07:46,021 --> 00:07:48,813 Wow, Scott, he did get better. 168 00:07:48,896 --> 00:07:49,855 Yeah, Leonard. 169 00:07:49,938 --> 00:07:52,521 This time your card, like, hit the ground. 170 00:07:52,604 --> 00:07:54,062 [laughter] 171 00:07:55,021 --> 00:07:56,271 What happened? 172 00:07:56,354 --> 00:07:58,354 I twisted when I should have tugged. 173 00:07:58,438 --> 00:08:00,062 It won't happen again. 174 00:08:00,146 --> 00:08:02,271 Good. We only have one more card. 175 00:08:09,771 --> 00:08:11,688 How'd he do that?! 176 00:08:11,771 --> 00:08:13,187 You, like, flipped it. 177 00:08:13,271 --> 00:08:16,271 It definitely had flipping action. 178 00:08:16,354 --> 00:08:18,813 We're gonna call you The Flipper. 179 00:08:18,896 --> 00:08:21,521 Leonard "The Flipper" Helperman. 180 00:08:21,604 --> 00:08:23,271 [Strickler] What's this? 181 00:08:23,354 --> 00:08:28,688 Wouldn't be kids tossing baseball cards, now, would it? 182 00:08:28,771 --> 00:08:33,771 No, we were just, uh... Picking teams for dodge ball. 183 00:08:33,855 --> 00:08:34,896 Yeah, that's it. 184 00:08:34,980 --> 00:08:36,896 See, we did some statistical analysis, 185 00:08:36,980 --> 00:08:38,980 and it turns out eenie, meenie, meinie, moe 186 00:08:39,062 --> 00:08:40,938 is pretty much predetermined by who you start with. 187 00:08:41,021 --> 00:08:42,855 This way is more fair. 188 00:08:43,229 --> 00:08:46,187 Interesting. 189 00:08:46,271 --> 00:08:49,021 It looked like a bunch of kids tossing cards, 190 00:08:49,146 --> 00:08:52,187 not that I would know anything about that. 191 00:08:52,271 --> 00:08:56,730 You know, back in my day, I was the best tosser there ever was. 192 00:09:07,062 --> 00:09:09,938 Look, it's Crosby-- Crosby the card man. 193 00:09:10,021 --> 00:09:11,771 -Crosby?! -Crosby?! 194 00:09:11,855 --> 00:09:13,980 Bing was very popular back then. 195 00:09:14,062 --> 00:09:15,062 -Bing? -Bing? 196 00:09:15,146 --> 00:09:16,855 The cherry ice cream? 197 00:09:16,938 --> 00:09:18,062 Never mind. 198 00:09:18,146 --> 00:09:20,062 Anyway, as I was remembering... 199 00:09:20,146 --> 00:09:21,479 I'm in. 200 00:09:21,563 --> 00:09:22,855 You're too good. 201 00:09:22,938 --> 00:09:24,229 We can't beat you. 202 00:09:24,855 --> 00:09:27,688 [Stickler] They were right. I was too good. 203 00:09:27,771 --> 00:09:29,312 It was time to think. 204 00:09:29,396 --> 00:09:30,730 Tell you what. 205 00:09:30,813 --> 00:09:32,312 Since I'm so good 206 00:09:32,396 --> 00:09:35,896 and nobody can never, ever beat me in a normal game, 207 00:09:35,980 --> 00:09:41,062 I will throw my card from all the way over there. 208 00:09:41,146 --> 00:09:43,187 You're not that good! 209 00:09:43,271 --> 00:09:44,312 He's never gonna make that! 210 00:09:44,396 --> 00:09:47,730 [Strickler] I knew we'd have a hard time judging the wind, 211 00:09:47,813 --> 00:09:49,396 but...I'd have to chance it, 212 00:09:49,479 --> 00:09:53,312 because the cutest girl in school was waiting for me near the old oak tree. 213 00:09:53,980 --> 00:09:56,938 And if I missed, she wouldn't go steady with me, 214 00:09:57,021 --> 00:09:59,479 and then we'd never have our first kiss! 215 00:09:59,563 --> 00:10:02,271 [all exclaim] 216 00:10:02,354 --> 00:10:05,187 We're fourth-graders, remember? 217 00:10:05,730 --> 00:10:08,146 Okay! Here comes! 218 00:10:12,229 --> 00:10:13,396 -Wow! -Wow! 219 00:10:13,479 --> 00:10:15,229 -Did you see that? -Cool! 220 00:10:15,312 --> 00:10:17,563 Ha! I told you I was the best! 221 00:10:17,813 --> 00:10:20,187 [Strickler] And it was on that day 222 00:10:20,271 --> 00:10:24,479 I knew I was destined to be a principal among kids. 223 00:10:24,563 --> 00:10:27,813 And to this day, nobody's ever beaten me... 224 00:10:27,896 --> 00:10:29,646 And nobody ever will. 225 00:10:29,730 --> 00:10:31,479 [Scott] Leonard can! 226 00:10:31,563 --> 00:10:33,354 [meows] 227 00:10:36,396 --> 00:10:37,896 Did I hear correctly? 228 00:10:37,980 --> 00:10:40,813 Not that there was any tossing of cards going on, 229 00:10:40,896 --> 00:10:44,104 but if there was-- and I'm not saying there was-- 230 00:10:44,187 --> 00:10:48,104 only if... then Leonard would be able to beat everybody! 231 00:10:48,479 --> 00:10:49,312 Including you! 232 00:10:49,438 --> 00:10:50,771 Don't make me laugh! 233 00:10:50,855 --> 00:10:53,479 I'm the best and always will be! 234 00:10:53,563 --> 00:10:57,187 Hmm, it's a shame there's no way to prove it. 235 00:10:57,271 --> 00:10:59,730 Unless... You and Leonard... 236 00:10:59,813 --> 00:11:02,438 Article 27-13, paragraph 4, line 8 237 00:11:02,521 --> 00:11:04,855 of the school regulations states, 238 00:11:04,938 --> 00:11:08,896 "The principal is forbidden from competing against students 239 00:11:08,980 --> 00:11:13,354 in any game of skill involving a ball, puck, or playing cards." 240 00:11:13,438 --> 00:11:15,521 [laughs] Hey...We understand. 241 00:11:15,604 --> 00:11:17,563 It's no crime to be scared. 242 00:11:17,646 --> 00:11:18,771 Scared?! 243 00:11:18,855 --> 00:11:23,604 I'll have you know that "not scared" is my middle name! 244 00:11:23,688 --> 00:11:26,021 So I guess we'll never really know 245 00:11:26,104 --> 00:11:27,646 if you're as good as you say. 246 00:11:27,730 --> 00:11:29,229 Of course I am! 247 00:11:29,312 --> 00:11:33,604 I suppose one could interpret a baseball card 248 00:11:33,688 --> 00:11:37,104 to be different from a playing card. 249 00:11:37,187 --> 00:11:38,646 Then it's set! 250 00:11:38,730 --> 00:11:41,730 And since you're so good, why not make it interesting? 251 00:11:41,813 --> 00:11:43,771 If Leonard wins, the whole school 252 00:11:43,855 --> 00:11:46,229 gets an extra 10 minutes of recess all week! 253 00:11:46,312 --> 00:11:48,730 Oh, great idea! Okay! 254 00:11:48,813 --> 00:11:50,354 [boy] I like that! 255 00:11:50,438 --> 00:11:54,354 And if I win, it's double homework all year! 256 00:11:54,354 --> 00:11:58,021 -Unh-unh! Too risky! -I don't think so! 257 00:11:58,104 --> 00:11:59,730 I don't like that! 258 00:11:59,813 --> 00:12:00,855 Don't agree. 259 00:12:00,938 --> 00:12:03,563 If I lose, the whole school will hate me! 260 00:12:03,646 --> 00:12:05,521 Thanks a lot, Leonard! 261 00:12:05,604 --> 00:12:07,312 Way to go, Leonard. 262 00:12:07,396 --> 00:12:09,730 I am extremely disappointed! 263 00:12:09,813 --> 00:12:11,813 [Scott] Yes, but what if you win? 264 00:12:11,896 --> 00:12:15,730 [all] Leonard! Leonard! Leonard! Leonard! 265 00:12:15,813 --> 00:12:17,688 Leonard! Leonard! 266 00:12:17,771 --> 00:12:18,771 I'll do it! 267 00:12:18,855 --> 00:12:20,646 Let's see... 268 00:12:24,771 --> 00:12:29,354 I think I'll use my lucky '63 Yankee outfielder. 269 00:12:32,521 --> 00:12:34,646 Dead center! 270 00:12:34,730 --> 00:12:37,187 Oh, that'll teach you to try to teach something 271 00:12:37,271 --> 00:12:39,813 to the head of the teachers! 272 00:12:47,104 --> 00:12:48,646 [all cheer] 273 00:12:48,730 --> 00:12:51,229 Who's next? 274 00:13:01,229 --> 00:13:02,479 It's The Flipper! 275 00:13:02,563 --> 00:13:04,521 [boy] Flipper's in the building! 276 00:13:04,604 --> 00:13:05,604 The Flipper! 277 00:13:10,604 --> 00:13:12,896 [gasps] 278 00:13:19,104 --> 00:13:20,938 [gurgling] 279 00:13:26,771 --> 00:13:29,396 So, who wants to play? 280 00:13:29,479 --> 00:13:31,604 None of us have cards left, dude. 281 00:13:31,688 --> 00:13:32,771 You won 'em all. 282 00:13:32,855 --> 00:13:35,563 Give some of our cards back so we can play. 283 00:13:35,646 --> 00:13:37,896 No way! I won 'em, 'cause I'm the best! 284 00:13:37,980 --> 00:13:39,688 Yeah... at luck. 285 00:13:39,771 --> 00:13:43,479 Nobody can make a card blow another card out of a circle. 286 00:13:43,563 --> 00:13:46,021 I can. Tell 'em, Scott. 287 00:13:46,104 --> 00:13:48,187 Well, I would just say... 288 00:13:48,271 --> 00:13:51,479 Hey! How 'bout if Scott plays against Leonard! 289 00:13:51,563 --> 00:13:53,479 Yeah, you taught him, dude. 290 00:13:53,563 --> 00:13:54,813 You could probably beat him 291 00:13:54,896 --> 00:13:57,271 with your hands tied behind your back. 292 00:13:57,354 --> 00:13:59,563 You can win our cards back for us. 293 00:13:59,646 --> 00:14:02,771 Compete against Leonard? Oh, I couldn't! He's too good! 294 00:14:02,855 --> 00:14:04,813 Even without that lucky break, 295 00:14:04,896 --> 00:14:07,187 he would've won against Strickler. 296 00:14:07,271 --> 00:14:10,938 Lucky break?! Even you don't believe I planned that shot! 297 00:14:11,021 --> 00:14:13,396 Leonard, I... I think it's fair to say 298 00:14:13,479 --> 00:14:15,730 that based on simple high-school physics 299 00:14:15,813 --> 00:14:18,646 and generally accepted principles of meteorology, 300 00:14:18,730 --> 00:14:21,521 nobody is good enough to have planned that shot. 301 00:14:21,604 --> 00:14:23,229 I am! I'm the best! 302 00:14:23,312 --> 00:14:25,271 And I want everybody to know it. 303 00:14:25,354 --> 00:14:26,479 And if you don't believe me, 304 00:14:26,563 --> 00:14:28,521 then why don't you compete against me? 305 00:14:28,604 --> 00:14:30,604 Come on, buddy! I don't want to do this! 306 00:14:30,688 --> 00:14:33,438 Scott's scared! Scott's a chicken! 307 00:14:33,521 --> 00:14:34,813 Quack quack quack! 308 00:14:34,896 --> 00:14:37,855 That's a duck sound, but we get your point. 309 00:14:37,938 --> 00:14:41,354 So you want to compete. Fine. 310 00:14:41,354 --> 00:14:43,354 In the park, 3:00. 311 00:14:43,438 --> 00:14:45,271 [cheering] 312 00:14:45,354 --> 00:14:47,604 I'll win everybody's cards back so quickly 313 00:14:47,688 --> 00:14:50,646 we'll still have time to do homework before dinner! 314 00:14:50,730 --> 00:14:52,813 [all] Ohh! 315 00:14:52,896 --> 00:14:54,604 Or maybe not. 316 00:14:54,688 --> 00:14:56,813 [cheering] 317 00:15:02,855 --> 00:15:04,896 [Mr. Jolly] I was gonna build a China shop, 318 00:15:04,980 --> 00:15:08,104 but instead decided to make this exact scale replica 319 00:15:08,187 --> 00:15:09,479 of the Eiffel Tower. 320 00:15:09,563 --> 00:15:11,271 The Tour Eiffel. 321 00:15:11,354 --> 00:15:13,855 The original structure is in Paris, 322 00:15:13,938 --> 00:15:16,521 and made totally of wrought iron. 323 00:15:16,604 --> 00:15:18,271 It was designed and built 324 00:15:18,354 --> 00:15:21,563 by French civil engineer Alexandre-Gustave Eiffel 325 00:15:21,646 --> 00:15:25,396 for the Paris world's fair in 1889, Paris. 326 00:15:25,479 --> 00:15:27,521 You've been hanging around dog-boy too long. 327 00:15:27,604 --> 00:15:28,855 Gotta say I'm impressed. 328 00:15:28,938 --> 00:15:30,646 Really? I'm very proud of it. 329 00:15:30,730 --> 00:15:33,104 Feels good to be able to express myself. 330 00:15:33,187 --> 00:15:35,479 Heard there's lots of wind in Paris. 331 00:15:35,563 --> 00:15:36,855 [wind blowing] 332 00:15:41,062 --> 00:15:41,980 No!! 333 00:15:42,062 --> 00:15:44,479 No! Don't-- hold it-- 334 00:15:44,563 --> 00:15:46,563 Aaah! 335 00:15:46,646 --> 00:15:48,688 That time was not an accident! 336 00:15:48,771 --> 00:15:50,479 You can't fool me, Pretty Boy! 337 00:15:50,563 --> 00:15:52,104 You've been destroying my art on purpose! 338 00:15:52,187 --> 00:15:55,146 Art? thought playing with cards wasn't art! 339 00:15:55,229 --> 00:15:56,521 Gotcha! 340 00:15:56,604 --> 00:16:00,730 This is different! I made something with these cards! 341 00:16:00,813 --> 00:16:04,312 I made things! Royal flushes, full houses. 342 00:16:04,396 --> 00:16:06,688 It's not the same! You can't compare! 343 00:16:06,771 --> 00:16:08,146 These are my creations! 344 00:16:08,229 --> 00:16:10,479 They bring me joy, and by destroying them, 345 00:16:10,563 --> 00:16:13,479 you're keeping me from expressing my true inner self! 346 00:16:13,563 --> 00:16:16,688 Watchin' them fall brings me joy. That's my art. 347 00:16:16,771 --> 00:16:20,563 I'm gonna nap. All this expressin' myself made me tired. 348 00:16:22,563 --> 00:16:25,438 Destroying art is not art! 349 00:16:32,521 --> 00:16:34,896 Dude, where are they? 350 00:16:36,563 --> 00:16:39,438 At ease. This is off school grounds. 351 00:16:39,521 --> 00:16:41,938 I've come to watch Scott Leadready 352 00:16:42,021 --> 00:16:44,479 win back my '63 Yankee outfielder. 353 00:16:44,563 --> 00:16:48,521 It's only been a few hours, and... 354 00:16:48,604 --> 00:16:50,438 I miss him already. 355 00:16:50,521 --> 00:16:52,021 [bell tolls] 356 00:16:52,104 --> 00:16:53,688 Maybe they chickened out. 357 00:16:53,771 --> 00:16:56,438 Now I'll never get my card back! 358 00:16:56,521 --> 00:16:58,896 Wait! Over there! 359 00:17:05,146 --> 00:17:06,855 [all] Ooh! 360 00:17:12,312 --> 00:17:13,521 Is that The Flipper? 361 00:17:13,604 --> 00:17:14,563 He's so buff. 362 00:17:14,646 --> 00:17:16,855 [boy] Has he been workin' out? 363 00:17:43,438 --> 00:17:47,021 That would've been more impressive if I had more cards. 364 00:17:47,104 --> 00:17:48,187 You toss first. 365 00:17:48,271 --> 00:17:50,146 Why don't you toss first? 366 00:17:50,229 --> 00:17:52,896 Because I said, "you toss first," first. 367 00:17:52,980 --> 00:17:55,354 What if I say, "I toss last," first? 368 00:17:55,438 --> 00:17:59,312 "You toss first" supercedes "you toss last." 369 00:17:59,396 --> 00:18:02,104 It's a rule! 370 00:18:02,187 --> 00:18:03,354 Let's see. 371 00:18:03,438 --> 00:18:06,646 I think I'll use the lucky '63 Yankee outfielder. 372 00:18:06,730 --> 00:18:07,980 My baby! 373 00:18:11,646 --> 00:18:12,938 Beat that! 374 00:18:13,021 --> 00:18:14,688 Ooh, lucky toss. 375 00:18:14,771 --> 00:18:18,354 For the last time, it's not luck. 376 00:18:23,312 --> 00:18:24,271 Wow! 377 00:18:24,354 --> 00:18:25,354 Oh, man! 378 00:18:25,438 --> 00:18:26,646 Did you see that? 379 00:18:26,730 --> 00:18:29,604 Tie. I'll go first this time. 380 00:18:45,062 --> 00:18:46,187 I'm sorry, bunkie. 381 00:18:46,271 --> 00:18:50,813 I didn't want to make you look bad, but you left me no choice. 382 00:18:50,896 --> 00:18:52,896 Lucky toss. Watch this. 383 00:19:08,146 --> 00:19:09,604 [gasps] 384 00:19:09,688 --> 00:19:11,563 That was amazing! 385 00:19:11,646 --> 00:19:14,354 Arresting! Prodigious! 386 00:19:14,438 --> 00:19:16,396 Fifth-grade words. 387 00:19:16,479 --> 00:19:20,479 I gotta admit, that was the best toss ever. 388 00:19:20,563 --> 00:19:23,187 Certainly outdid yourself this time. 389 00:19:23,271 --> 00:19:26,104 [Mr. Jolly] It's the Empire State Building. 390 00:19:26,187 --> 00:19:29,062 I used mostly cards made of heavyweight paper. 391 00:19:29,146 --> 00:19:30,980 How many cards you use? 392 00:19:31,062 --> 00:19:33,563 Oh, gee-- I co-- I lost count. 393 00:19:33,646 --> 00:19:35,187 Why do you ask? 394 00:19:35,271 --> 00:19:36,604 No reason. 395 00:19:38,312 --> 00:19:39,730 [Pretty Boy] Aigh! 396 00:19:39,813 --> 00:19:42,604 I said, "mostly" made of cardboard, didn't I? 397 00:19:42,688 --> 00:19:45,396 I didn't mention, I guess, I used an anvil! 398 00:19:45,479 --> 00:19:47,771 Ha ha ha ha! 399 00:19:52,146 --> 00:19:54,688 Leonard is the best. 400 00:19:56,938 --> 00:19:58,229 Say I'm the best again. 401 00:19:58,312 --> 00:20:00,730 I will not! What's gotten into you? 402 00:20:00,813 --> 00:20:01,938 Shake my hand! 403 00:20:02,021 --> 00:20:03,771 What was that, Scott? 404 00:20:03,855 --> 00:20:05,813 You said no one, including yourself, 405 00:20:05,896 --> 00:20:08,813 is a good-enough player to shine my shoes? 406 00:20:08,896 --> 00:20:10,604 Okay! That's it! 407 00:20:10,688 --> 00:20:12,855 What's it? That I'm the best? 408 00:20:12,938 --> 00:20:14,521 Say you're sorry! 409 00:20:14,604 --> 00:20:17,521 I'm sorry? What? Why am I sorry? 410 00:20:17,604 --> 00:20:20,062 You can't treat people this way, Leonard! 411 00:20:20,146 --> 00:20:23,104 There's a big difference between saying, "I'm the winner," 412 00:20:23,187 --> 00:20:26,021 and saying, "everybody's a bunch of losers!" 413 00:20:26,104 --> 00:20:28,146 Being the best is more than just having a skill, 414 00:20:28,229 --> 00:20:29,896 it's also about having humility! 415 00:20:29,980 --> 00:20:31,980 It's making the people who didn't win 416 00:20:32,062 --> 00:20:34,146 at least feel good about competing. 417 00:20:34,229 --> 00:20:36,271 You may have won everybody's cards, Leonard, 418 00:20:36,354 --> 00:20:38,354 but you haven't won their respect. 419 00:20:42,646 --> 00:20:44,146 You're right. 420 00:20:48,813 --> 00:20:51,271 Why are you giving the cards back, dude? 421 00:20:51,354 --> 00:20:53,312 You won 'em, fair and square. 422 00:20:53,396 --> 00:20:54,938 I never really wanted them. 423 00:20:55,021 --> 00:20:57,354 I didn't do this to get a bunch of cards. 424 00:20:57,438 --> 00:20:59,771 Look, I know you guys are never gonna say 425 00:20:59,855 --> 00:21:01,521 I'm the smartest one in class, 426 00:21:01,604 --> 00:21:04,021 or elect me captain of the kickball team, 427 00:21:04,104 --> 00:21:06,563 but just once, I wanted to hear everyone say 428 00:21:06,646 --> 00:21:09,521 that I was the best at something, anything. 429 00:21:09,980 --> 00:21:11,396 Scott's right, though. 430 00:21:11,479 --> 00:21:13,521 How can I expect you guys to say I'm the best 431 00:21:13,604 --> 00:21:14,855 when I made you all hate me? 432 00:21:15,396 --> 00:21:17,396 After I took all the fun out of the game? 433 00:21:17,479 --> 00:21:18,855 I'm sorry. 434 00:21:20,021 --> 00:21:20,938 [smooches] 435 00:21:24,563 --> 00:21:27,354 It takes quite a guy to do what he just did. 436 00:21:27,479 --> 00:21:29,354 He really was the best. 437 00:21:29,438 --> 00:21:31,354 One day, we can tell our kids 438 00:21:31,438 --> 00:21:33,730 that we saw The Flipper in action. 439 00:21:34,062 --> 00:21:35,354 It's true, though. 440 00:21:35,438 --> 00:21:38,021 He's not, like, the smartest one in class. 441 00:21:38,104 --> 00:21:40,813 Yeah. And he never will be the team captain. 442 00:21:41,312 --> 00:21:44,438 They couldn't wait till I at least got out of the park? 443 00:21:45,604 --> 00:21:46,980 [Strickler] I'll never forget that day 444 00:21:47,062 --> 00:21:49,688 I watched Leonard Helperman walk off into the sunset. 445 00:21:50,062 --> 00:21:55,563 Like those who saw Babe Ruth hit a home run, or Ty Cobb steal a base, 446 00:21:55,896 --> 00:21:59,146 I, too, had borne witness to a moment of greatness. 447 00:21:59,229 --> 00:22:02,021 Good as I may have been at tossing cards, 448 00:22:02,104 --> 00:22:05,855 on that day, I saw Mr. Helperman surpass me. 449 00:22:05,938 --> 00:22:08,938 I watched him accomplish what I never could. 450 00:22:09,396 --> 00:22:12,062 I watched him become the best.