I'm exhausted.
I don't know if I can handle it any longer.
She only got here yesterday.
You know I had a dream she'd gone, Mum.
We were lying by an oak tree, soaking up the silence.
Or maybe it was a beach?
I wish.
But the point is, when I woke up,
for one blissful moment, I actually thought it was true.
SHE SIGHS
Are you all right?
I'm going to impress your auntie today if it kills me.
Well, it looks like
you could do with a hand, Mother.
Are you sure you're not too tired?
Don't be cheeky.
Excuse me?
Can I help you?
What day is it?
And, where am I?
Ooh!
TRAY SIZZLES
Agh!
MOBILE RINGS
Hello?
Oh, yes.
Sorry, I missed your call yesterday.
Great.
When do I start?
Wow. Um...
No, I wasn't expecting that.
I just hadn't thought about moving, that's all.
What exactly is this job?
Oh, you must have some very good restaurants around here
if they deliver this early in the morning.
All home-made.
By you?
It's the least I can do.
Ooh!
Mm! Not bad -
for an English girl.
I thought we'd show you the sights this morning.
Birmingham has sights?
World-class sights, Auntie.
Everything was just done up for the Games.
I thought we'd start with a walk round Centenary Square,
take in Brindley Place, the canals, the statues, the fountains...
And then the Mailbox.
The what? Shopping.
Oh! How exciting!
I was in Wolverhampton -
that's where I live -
but that was two days ago.
I can't remember anything since.
You don't know how you got to Letherbridge?
No. But the way my feet hurt...
I'll ask one of the doctors if they can take a look for you.
No way I can walk home.
Is there a number you can call?
I don't have my phone.
Well, you can use mine.
Um, I don't know anyone's number.
Everything's on my phone. Of course.
I can lend you money for a cab.
What happened to me?
No idea.
But it can't hurt to have a doctor look at your feet while you're here.
There is one number. OK?
Um, 01632...
..960...
..376.
It's my father's landline. OK.
MOBILE RINGING TONE
I was looking at him -
his face - and then...
Are you OK?
The loo!
Yeah, it's straight across the reception.
VOICEMAIL: Please leave your message after the tone.
Hi. This is Bear Sylvester at the Mill Health Centre in Letherbridge.
Um...your daughter, Jillian, is here so...
..if you could give me a call
on 077 009 00831 when you get this?
END OF CALL TONE
Do you remember hitting your head, or falling?
I don't remember anything.
Well, there's no signs of trauma
and there's nothing seriously wrong with your feet.
Have you had an episode like this before? Losing your memory?
No.
OK.
Has anything disturbing happened recently? Any emotional upset?
Sorry, I...
Just you, you remind me of my father...
..when he touched me.
Are you OK?
I'm going to be sick.
That's the second time that's happened. What did I do?
Every time she mentions her father, she feels sick.
Oh.
Do you reckon there's a connection?
What? To her memory loss?
Possibly.
But, regardless, she's going to need to go to A&E.
I think I'm going to go with her.
I just don't think she needs to be alone right now.
Mate, you could be waiting for hours.
That's the least of my worries.
I sent a message to her dad.
And if she has issues with him...
That's the last thing she needs.
Exactly.
What was the name of that last place? Brindley Place.
I don't know why, but it reminds me of the Barbican for some reason.
I mean, of course,
without the magical waterways and the waterfalls.
Did you know that Barbican means fortified gateway?
Which, of course, it was in the Roman times.
I wonder what Birmingham was? A field?
Or a forest?
I was really hoping that exhibition was still on.
Exhibition?
Indian Dance In The Black Country.
Don't be racist, dear.
Auntie, the Black Country is a place in the West Midlands.
Oh. It's called that because of the coal dust.
Do you know, one of my many charities sponsors
Jampura Dance Company at the Barbican.
Sir John Fryers conducted.
I actually wrote a poem for that.
Oh. Another one? Yeah.
"Divine Barbican, golden jewel of the steaming Thames..."
Here we are.
Sorry? The restaurant.
Oh, how lovely!
Oh.
I really...I really want a burger.
Fine.
But a mate at work's telling me to eat less meat.
There's a veggie burger. Hmm...
Just order something, Rich.
I suppose I could try it.
You said this was important?
It's a job.
Good. A big job.
Even better.
Long contract, amazing money.
My mate Gordie got me onto it.
It's basically the perfect gig.
Fantastic.
I haven't taken it.
Why not?
There's a problem.
What?
It's in Dubai.
The last time we spoke, you were trying
to decide on a specialisation.
Any luck with that?
General practice is a specialisation.
It doesn't sound very special.
I also work in adolescent mental health.
Oh. Is that actually a thing? Or...?
Very much so.
Oh.
Just an odd choice.
Why?
Well, just doesn't sound all that interesting.
Mind you, everybody goes on about it these days, don't they?
What?
Well, you can't turn on the news
without hearing about someone's dreadful childhood trauma.
They can be quite serious, Auntie.
Yeah, but everybody is so anxious, you wonder how they get by.
I mean, when I was younger,
you know, I had such thick skin so that I could just be OK.
In a lot of ways, that made life a lot easier.
That's just... That's just not true.
Well, in fairness, you weren't there.
The threat to mental health because of lockdowns is
just as serious as anything young people have faced -
not to mention the cost of living crisis.
Oh, is that why you chose it? Or...?
No, I just...
I just thought it was...
What? Interesting?
I don't know. Important? Yes...
Actually, I suggested it.
You? Yes.
Hmm.
And you didn't think you could do better?
No. I don't. Excuse me.
Well done.
The security of a six-month contract,
more money than you've ever had,
an exciting place to live.
Maybe.
The opportunity to travel, a new start.
That's a good list of pros.
What about the cons?
The heat, no alcohol, being far away,
not being able to see Ollie, not being able to see you.
I know we said that one didn't matter but it matters to me.
Is that the real reason you haven't said yes?
It would mean giving up on you.
For good.
And I know, yeah, it's over, but it's not easy for me.
You have to accept it, Rich.
Well, it's hard.
Is that so terrible?
Maybe a new location will give you a new perspective.
And maybe it won't.
And I'll be all the way over there on my own.
Maybe you'll meet someone. Hmm!
Not likely.
You have to be positive.
I know.
What? There is a way.
It just might work.
PHONE BEEPS
Hello?
PHONE BEEPS
BEEPING CONTINUES
It's an important and growing area of health care.
It's not exactly brain surgery, though, is it?
And, apparently, it wasn't his choice.
Do you know what, Binita?
I don't remember you ever approving of anything I've done.
Oh, don't be so hard on yourself.
You do a lot of things right.
Like...? Well, there's...
The main thing is we both want what is best for Sunil.
I am thinking of what's best for him.
You know, I do wonder how much more he could have achieved
if Rahul was still around.
Rahul loved Sunil,
but there was a lot more stick than carrot in their relationship.
Probably good for him.
It wasn't always effective.
At least he didn't spoil the boy.
I don't spoil him.
I am generous with him, but no more than any loving mother would be.
I'm a mother, too.
And I know how hard it can be to say no.
I do say no.
Not according to Rahul.
He used to complain to the rest of us
that you were making Sunil lazy and complacent.
He said that?
What else did he say?
That doesn't matter.
OK, I am actually worried about Sunil.
He doesn't even know why he's a GP.
He's clearly just playing at it.
Are you all right?
Yeah, I'm fine.
You're not really, though, are you?
Are you still thinking about your dad? Why would I be?
No idea. Sorry.
It's none of my business.
How can I forget everything like that?
That's why we're here -
to find out.
What if they can't? What if I'm just losing my mind?
No, no, no. If working with doctors has taught me anything,
it's that mental problems are as important as physical ones.
If you're not well, you get help.
I don't trust doctors. Why not?
Mm - authority figures. I basically don't trust anyone.
Mmm, yeah.
You trusted me.
I had no choice.
Sorry, that sounds awful.
I do appreciate what you did.
I think you might maybe benefit from seeing someone professionally.
I don't need help.
Proper counselling.
He won't bother me again.
Your dad? Mm-hm.
It's all in the past.
The thing is...
..I left him a message saying where he might find you.
Who? Your dad.
MOBILE RINGS
He won't get it.
I think he just did.
He's dead.
Right.
Someone got the message.
Don't answer it.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah.
OVEN TIMER BEEPS
Nearly done.
DOOR BANGS
Ollie?
What are you doing here, Dad?
What are YOU doing?
Nothing.
Let's have a brew, then.
PHONE RINGS
That's the fourth time.
Maybe it's your mum? She died three years ago.
It's got to be someone.
There's no-one else. OK. OK.
But it can't be your dad, right?
So, I'm just going to answer it, OK?
Hello?
Who is this?
Bear Sylvester.
I left a message.
Who are you? Is my sister with you?
Sister?
Do you have a sister?
Hannah. What are you doing in Letherbridge?
I told you I was coming -
if you ever checked your messages. What's going on?
I don't know.
I can't remember anything.
The door was wide open, your stuff's all over the floor,
there's sick in the upstairs hallway.
I'm sorry.
Where are you?
Tell her where we are.
St Phil's Hospital, Letherbridge.
I'll be as quick as I can.
Don't let her run off.
You want me to go to Dubai with you?
You'll be my apprentice. You'll learn proper skills.
Isn't that why you wanted to join the Army? Yeah, but I...
This way, you'll get the same result but without the boot polishing,
marching, sentry duty...
With this on your CV, you can write your own ticket.
In Dubai?
Year-round sun, beaches, the high life.
What could possibly go wrong?
A lot of things could go wrong.
You know, I just made the biggest mistake of my life, Dad,
and I just got away with it.
This is different. Put the kettle on and I'll tell you all about it.
Look, you'll see I'm right.
Yeah - that's what it's really about, isn't it?
You just want me there to look after you.
To make you endless cups of tea. That's not fair. And it's not true.
Maybe...
..maybe you're just afraid to be on your own.
Can we just drop this? No!
You're taking it far too seriously.
Well, you said I was playing at being a doctor. Well, yes, but...
Well, I'm not. I am a doctor.
And I am going to be every bit as good as dad was.
I don't doubt that. You obviously do!
I am just trying to help, Sunil.
You have no idea how hard I've worked to get through med school.
Do you even know what Mum actually does or how hard she's worked?
My sons have worked... And I'm not spoilt!
Please! I care for my mum
and I am proud of her
and I am sick of you getting at us.
Suni... And so are you, Mum.
I think you're just being a little bit too over-sensitive.
Go on, tell her.
I'm sure your mother doesn't mind
a little bit of constructive criticism.
Mum?
Actually, I do.
I'm sorry?
I've tried everything I can to please you.
For 30 years.
And nothing is ever good enough.
Well, I know it must have been difficult for you
to join our family as you did,
but I have been nothing but nice to you.
That's a lie.
It was never just about me not being Indian or Hindu.
You don't like me and you never have.
And you didn't think I was good enough for Rahul.
Rahul was very special to me!
If looking after my son and doing whatever I can for him
is spoiling him, then I'm guilty as charged.
There are limits.
Not for me.
I love my son...
..and I'm not ashamed of it.
He died of a stroke,
a week ago.
I never saw him.
The last thing I remember is being at the house.
Your dad's house?
Yeah.
I had to sort things out.
Um...
And the moment I walked in, it all came back -
all the hurt, all the humiliation.
And I saw his picture.
I think I tried to get to the loo.
And then I must have run off and left the door open.
All because of your dad?
Yeah.
I was six, or seven.
And I had a fever. I was delirious.
And I remember him putting me to bed.
And...
..it's all jumbled-up in my head.
I've suppressed it for years.
Suppressed? Suppressed what?
And then, five years ago, it all came out.
Horrible dreams about him coming into my bedroom
while I was asleep...
..getting into my bed...
..and touching my feet.
He abused you?
Yeah.
For years.
I'm so sorry.
It all makes sense...
..why I don't have any friends, no boyfriend, why I can't keep a job.
You never thought of seeing someone professional? No.
I can't go through all that.
Who'd believe me, after all this time?
What about your sister?
Oh, was she...?
I don't think so.
We don't really talk about it.
I just have to get through the funeral and then I can move on.
Maybe I'll try him again in the morning.
When he's had a chance to think about it.
Did he sound like he might change his mind? No.
It's a great opportunity for you
but Ollie's at a different point in his life.
But what if he's missing out on a chance to make something of himself?
I think we have to trust him to sort himself out.
And maybe it's best for you to get a fresh start
without worrying about Ollie.
Yeah.
Maybe you're right.
I'll call Gordie now.
Let him know I'll take the job. Good.
I'll let you know dates and details. OK. Bye.
Hopefully, they'll be able to rule out any physical cause.
If it wasn't physical, then what caused it?
I'm not a doctor.
But maybe it was triggered by when she went to her dad's house
and remembered... She told you what he did?
Sounded pretty traumatic.
If it happened.
Sorry?
We had a happy childhood.
Kind, loving parents.
See, that's not what she told me.
And we shared a room.
If anything had happened, I'd have known.
Are you trying to say she's making it up?
I don't know.
Did she mention it when you were little?
Jillian got sick a lot as a kid.
Terrible fevers.
Sleepwalking.
She'd wake me up, saying crazy things.
In the morning, she wouldn't remember anything.
Yeah, but she remembers now.
Five years ago, she lost her job.
She went to pieces - drank too much, did a load of drugs.
That's when she started remembering.
Did I go too far? No.
The last thing I need is
a confrontation with your dad's family.
You stood up for yourself - and not a decade too soon.
BINITA CLEARS HER THROAT
Auntie...?
What are you doing? I know when I'm not wanted.
Look, Binita, things got out of hand.
They most certainly did.
We're all grieving for Rahul in different ways.
And when people are grieving,
they...just say things they don't really mean.
So, you didn't mean what you said?
I think she's talking about you.
Criticising you is my way of grieving for my brother?
Is that what you're saying?
If it is, it's not very healthy.
DOORBELL RINGS
My taxi's here.
But before I go...
..I've written a haiku.
Home truths in a home
Bitter words, poisoned thinking
I float above, pure.
DOOR SLAMS
What?
BOTH GIGGLE
I'm sorry this is taking so long.
Not your fault.
But, you know, I'm sure they will sort you out
when they get to see you.
Thanks for everything.
I don't know what I would have done without you. No problem.
Well, good luck.
How could she go all that way
without knowing who she is, where she's going?
That's why they call it dissociative fugue.
It comes from the Latin - to flee.
But now, she doesn't remember anything. People usually don't.
Two whole days. It can last for months.
Seriously?
Yeah. There's been cases of people
building whole new identities, new lives, even. Oh.
Does it happen a lot, though?
No, no, no. It's pretty rare.
We studied a case at uni
but I've never actually come across it, myself.
Why does it happen?
A combination of things -
amnesia, identity disorder,
trauma.
Basically, it's a sort of defence mechanism.
Because of what happened with her father?
Maybe. But that was years ago, though.
Yeah, well, stress can be a trigger -
financial troubles, failed relationships, deaths.
Didn't you mention she was drinking a lot, doing drugs?
Any of that could have set it off.
And could it happen to her...again?
Yeah. Yeah, it could.
That's why she needs to get help.
It could be linked to serious mental illness.
And if she does have traumatic memories,
processing them could go a long way.
What if, um, it didn't really happen?
I don't think we'll ever know, one way or another.
Either way, she needs help.
I remember everything he did to me.
How can I remember if didn't happen?
I don't know.
It happened, Hannah -
no matter what you think.
Jillian, it doesn't matter what I think.
For you it's real.
That's what matters.
And it's destroying you.
Whatever happened, you need to work it out
and deal with it.
How do you deal with something like that?
Let's wait and see what the doctors say.
But one way or another, this is serious.
What if I'm right? What if it really did happen?
Then, I'll be there for you.
Will you?
You're my sister!
Now Mum and Dad are gone,
you're all I have.
I never went to visit Mum.
Not even when she was dying.
She knew you weren't well.
She told me to look after you.
Are you all right?
Do you think your dad really did complain to his family about me?
He wouldn't.
Your auntie couldn't make it all up.
Why not? She is a poet.
It would break my heart if that's how he felt about me.
And if he told them.
I am sure he didn't, Mum.
I hope not.
Now, get out of the way and let me spoil you, for a change.
You are a brilliant mum, OK.
You always have been.
Now, go and sit down.
She didn't know which way was up!
There was a man in the house!
I mean, what bloke?
I was scared!
I wasn't going to go to that Flavio thing,
but I wangled a plus-two, if you're interested?
Shut up!
I ask and the universe answers!
I'll take that as a yes.
It must have worked, because they really like the place.
Shame you're going to have to let them down.
I'm not.