1 00:00:05,945 --> 00:00:07,221 RORY: This is humiliating. 2 00:00:07,365 --> 00:00:09,643 LORELAI: No, we passed humiliating two minutes ago. 3 00:00:09,828 --> 00:00:12,470 Luke's gonna be out of doughnuts by the time we get there. 4 00:00:12,666 --> 00:00:14,908 I don't know why he won't buy six extra-sprinkled ones... 5 00:00:15,087 --> 00:00:16,682 so we'd never have the conversation... 6 00:00:16,841 --> 00:00:18,682 which we're going to have if we ever get there. 7 00:00:18,718 --> 00:00:20,597 I've got school in two hours. I won't make it. 8 00:00:20,764 --> 00:00:23,326 Kirk, how are you doing? You sure? 9 00:00:23,895 --> 00:00:26,650 You seem to be having a little trouble forming words there. 10 00:00:26,859 --> 00:00:29,137 [Strained] No. Fine... Me. 11 00:00:29,739 --> 00:00:31,971 You don't have to take us all the way to Luke's. 12 00:00:32,160 --> 00:00:36,043 - Yes, Kirk, listen to her. - I offered you the first ride... 13 00:00:36,294 --> 00:00:39,892 in Kirk's new Stars Hollow pedicab, and that is exactly what you're gonna get. 14 00:00:40,134 --> 00:00:41,170 Okay. 15 00:00:41,553 --> 00:00:44,867 Time just whizzes by when you're riding in a pedicab. 16 00:00:45,351 --> 00:00:47,822 - Hey, guys. - Hey, Gypsy. 17 00:00:48,566 --> 00:00:51,242 - Gypsy just out-strolled us. - We gotta get out of here. 18 00:00:51,447 --> 00:00:53,804 - How are we doing back there? - We're doing fine, Kirk. 19 00:00:53,993 --> 00:00:56,509 I figure this baby's gonna be a real money... 20 00:00:56,956 --> 00:00:58,869 A real money? Money what, Kirk? 21 00:00:59,545 --> 00:01:01,344 - Kirk, can you breathe? - Talk to us. 22 00:01:01,506 --> 00:01:03,704 Hit the handlebars three times if you can breathe... 23 00:01:03,886 --> 00:01:05,322 and two if you can't. 24 00:01:05,765 --> 00:01:07,484 - He hit once. - What does once mean? 25 00:01:07,644 --> 00:01:09,044 That he couldn't make it to twice? 26 00:01:09,188 --> 00:01:12,343 - Kirk, stop, please. - Just for a second. 27 00:01:12,819 --> 00:01:15,131 Then we'll be on our way. Like the wind. 28 00:01:16,201 --> 00:01:19,276 Okay, you know what, Kirk? This has been really fun... 29 00:01:19,499 --> 00:01:22,061 but I think we'll just hoof it the rest of the way. 30 00:01:22,254 --> 00:01:24,576 - But the ride wasn't over. - We don't want to hog the cab. 31 00:01:24,758 --> 00:01:26,738 - Since there's only one. - We'll tell our friends. 32 00:01:26,762 --> 00:01:27,923 What was wrong with the ride? 33 00:01:27,973 --> 00:01:30,569 Nothing. It's great for tourists who are new to the town... 34 00:01:30,769 --> 00:01:32,374 and want to make sure they don't miss a thing. 35 00:01:32,398 --> 00:01:33,469 I wasn't going that slow. 36 00:01:33,608 --> 00:01:35,505 No, you just maybe need a little more training... 37 00:01:35,529 --> 00:01:36,884 before tourist season kicks in. 38 00:01:37,031 --> 00:01:38,864 Take a spinning class or buy some legs. 39 00:01:39,035 --> 00:01:41,073 - Sorry, Kirk. - You will be sorry. 40 00:01:41,498 --> 00:01:43,889 You'll be sorry you turned down a chance... 41 00:01:44,086 --> 00:01:47,366 - to ride in Stars Hollow's first... - Now he's gonna hate us forever. 42 00:01:47,593 --> 00:01:50,554 No, he's not. He'll just hate us till something shiny comes by. 43 00:01:50,765 --> 00:01:51,881 Well, well... 44 00:01:52,018 --> 00:01:54,091 I guess it wasn't me that was slowing things down. 45 00:01:54,272 --> 00:01:57,666 I guess it was my big, fat cargo. Freshman 15! 46 00:01:58,529 --> 00:02:01,650 - Can't wait to get my doughnuts! - Stay away from my doughnut, Kirk! 47 00:02:01,869 --> 00:02:04,431 I mean it. It's my doughnut! Freak! 48 00:03:00,270 --> 00:03:02,308 Might as well stick your head in a sugar bowl. 49 00:03:02,481 --> 00:03:03,723 If you can find one big enough. 50 00:03:03,860 --> 00:03:05,541 You can't eat like that forever, you know? 51 00:03:05,654 --> 00:03:08,376 - What are you getting? - All-Bran. Asher turned me on to it. 52 00:03:08,577 --> 00:03:09,648 He's a romantic. 53 00:03:09,787 --> 00:03:12,463 He wants me to live a long time and be healthy. That is romantic. 54 00:03:12,667 --> 00:03:15,469 Okay. Just a joke. No reflection on your man-friend. 55 00:03:15,715 --> 00:03:18,311 So after breakfast, I'll pick up the sign for our table... 56 00:03:18,511 --> 00:03:20,231 and then I'll meet you in the courtyard. 57 00:03:20,390 --> 00:03:22,986 - Antioxidants. - I'll meet you in the courtyard. 58 00:03:23,187 --> 00:03:25,180 I'm actually really excited about this. 59 00:03:25,358 --> 00:03:27,874 It's our first social protest of significance in college. 60 00:03:28,072 --> 00:03:29,142 I know, it's so exciting. 61 00:03:29,282 --> 00:03:31,160 We actually get to do something important... 62 00:03:31,327 --> 00:03:33,015 make a difference, have a say in the world. 63 00:03:33,039 --> 00:03:36,159 Wouldn't it be amazing if we could get one Burmese prisoner released... 64 00:03:36,379 --> 00:03:39,101 - because of our petition? - You think small. Let's get them all out. 65 00:03:39,217 --> 00:03:40,570 - Even the guilty ones. - Hell, yes. 66 00:03:40,594 --> 00:03:42,587 Seriously? Because that'd be great, really great. 67 00:03:42,765 --> 00:03:45,077 So I'll pick you up at 7:00, Saturday morning. 68 00:03:45,269 --> 00:03:47,103 - Okay, Glenn. - Thank you, seriously. 69 00:03:47,273 --> 00:03:48,548 No problem, Glenn. 70 00:03:48,693 --> 00:03:49,889 This is a turning point. 71 00:03:50,028 --> 00:03:52,830 You know how you have them, when even the angry voices in your head... 72 00:03:53,034 --> 00:03:55,391 - have to shut up for just a minute? - Sure. 73 00:03:56,040 --> 00:03:57,111 Why is he so happy? 74 00:03:57,251 --> 00:03:59,129 I couldn't get away earlier for spring break. 75 00:03:59,295 --> 00:04:00,657 My friends are leaving without me. 76 00:04:00,716 --> 00:04:02,637 I need a ride, Glenn has a van, and there you go. 77 00:04:02,760 --> 00:04:04,242 You're going to Florida with a guy... 78 00:04:04,305 --> 00:04:06,507 who's bummed he got turned down by that German cannibal? 79 00:04:06,685 --> 00:04:08,563 That was just a rumor and, yes, I'm desperate. 80 00:04:08,731 --> 00:04:10,245 Glenn's not that bad. You'll be fine. 81 00:04:10,400 --> 00:04:12,473 There's room in the van if you guys need a ride. 82 00:04:12,654 --> 00:04:14,455 No, thank you. I don't think we're gonna do... 83 00:04:14,533 --> 00:04:15,763 the whole spring-break thing. 84 00:04:15,910 --> 00:04:19,030 Ever since I broke up with Moondoggie, soaking up the rays isn't the same. 85 00:04:19,250 --> 00:04:20,889 It'll be really fun. You're missing out. 86 00:04:21,045 --> 00:04:23,641 I'm not a spring break kind of gal, but thank you for the offer. 87 00:04:23,842 --> 00:04:25,195 Okay, but if you change your mind... 88 00:04:25,219 --> 00:04:27,337 Gary Gilmore's got room in the car. Got it. 89 00:04:27,515 --> 00:04:29,507 Janet, if you have a chance, you should stop by... 90 00:04:29,686 --> 00:04:31,847 and sign our petition for political prisoners in Burma. 91 00:04:32,024 --> 00:04:34,415 I'll try. I have to run out and get a new bathing suit... 92 00:04:34,612 --> 00:04:36,251 - before my class this afternoon. - Okay. 93 00:04:36,406 --> 00:04:38,524 Think of all the tortured souls festering in Burma... 94 00:04:38,702 --> 00:04:40,695 while you're at the size-two rack. 95 00:04:40,956 --> 00:04:42,392 I hate that she's thin. 96 00:04:51,685 --> 00:04:52,755 Hi, Luke. 97 00:04:52,896 --> 00:04:54,458 I saw you come in. I was gonna get to you. 98 00:04:54,482 --> 00:04:55,598 Sorry. 99 00:04:55,734 --> 00:04:57,776 If you don't like the service, you can go elsewhere. 100 00:04:57,822 --> 00:05:00,543 - Who could not like the service? - I'm busy. You ready to order? 101 00:05:00,743 --> 00:05:03,704 - Coffee for now. Is everything okay? - You're not gonna eat? 102 00:05:03,916 --> 00:05:06,273 I just came in for coffee and to show you something. 103 00:05:06,462 --> 00:05:08,899 We got the sample stationery and postcards for the inn. 104 00:05:09,093 --> 00:05:11,085 - What? - The stationery and the postcards... 105 00:05:11,263 --> 00:05:12,544 you leave in the guest's room... 106 00:05:12,683 --> 00:05:14,404 so that they can write a letter home saying: 107 00:05:14,436 --> 00:05:16,878 "Having a great time, wish you were here," which they don't... 108 00:05:17,023 --> 00:05:19,225 because you were what they were trying to get away from. 109 00:05:19,319 --> 00:05:21,437 - Nobody uses that stuff. - Sure they do. 110 00:05:21,615 --> 00:05:23,255 I have never once stayed in a hotel... 111 00:05:23,411 --> 00:05:25,643 and used the stationery or written a postcard. 112 00:05:25,832 --> 00:05:28,223 - Are you gonna order? - I did order, and what is with you? 113 00:05:28,420 --> 00:05:31,142 Nothing, I'm fine. The paper is fine. The postcards are fine. 114 00:05:31,342 --> 00:05:32,822 Why are you showing them to me? 115 00:05:32,970 --> 00:05:34,449 Because you're an investor in the inn. 116 00:05:34,473 --> 00:05:36,119 I want to keep you apprised of the goings-on. 117 00:05:36,143 --> 00:05:39,935 - I am not an investor. I loaned you money. - That is what investors do. 118 00:05:40,192 --> 00:05:42,583 - An investor goes to meetings. - We're having a meeting. 119 00:05:42,781 --> 00:05:46,903 - They're involved in business decisions. - Hello. Stationery. Decide. Yes, no? 120 00:05:47,956 --> 00:05:49,436 I'll get your coffee. 121 00:05:52,423 --> 00:05:54,097 - Do you want to talk about it? - What? 122 00:05:54,259 --> 00:05:57,300 Whatever it is that's put you in this charming mood. 123 00:05:59,895 --> 00:06:01,125 [Clearing throat] 124 00:06:02,818 --> 00:06:05,653 - I'm not wearing my socks. - What? 125 00:06:06,157 --> 00:06:09,994 - I'm not wearing my socks. - So, what are those, someone else's? 126 00:06:10,248 --> 00:06:11,569 - Yes. - What? 127 00:06:11,750 --> 00:06:15,304 - I'm wearing someone else's socks. - I'm sorry, I need more. 128 00:06:15,550 --> 00:06:18,590 - I spent the night at Nicole's place. - Also known as your place. 129 00:06:18,806 --> 00:06:21,846 Got up a little late, grabbed a pair of socks, and was halfway to work... 130 00:06:22,061 --> 00:06:24,498 when I realized they were someone else's socks. 131 00:06:24,692 --> 00:06:26,252 And you're sure about this? 132 00:06:26,403 --> 00:06:29,364 If there's one thing in this life I am sure about, it's my socks. 133 00:06:29,576 --> 00:06:32,731 I buy the same brand in bulk, and I've been doing this forever. 134 00:06:32,957 --> 00:06:34,949 My socks are all white with a red stripe. 135 00:06:35,128 --> 00:06:38,567 These are white with a gold stripe and some sort of fruity padding in the toe. 136 00:06:38,801 --> 00:06:41,795 - Maybe they're Jess' socks. - They are not Jess' socks. 137 00:06:42,016 --> 00:06:43,610 Maybe when you went to the Laundromat... 138 00:06:43,768 --> 00:06:46,080 someone accidentally left a pair of socks in the dryer... 139 00:06:46,273 --> 00:06:48,630 - and then your... - I don't go to a Laundromat. 140 00:06:48,819 --> 00:06:51,974 Maybe they're Nicole's socks. You know, her gym socks or... 141 00:06:53,119 --> 00:06:56,717 - You're not wearing your socks. - I am not wearing my socks. 142 00:06:57,836 --> 00:07:00,273 RORY: Show your support for the Burmese prisoners. 143 00:07:00,466 --> 00:07:02,459 Sign up now. Take a stand. 144 00:07:02,720 --> 00:07:06,000 This bowl of rice is all a Burmese prisoner gets to eat in a day. 145 00:07:06,227 --> 00:07:10,270 One bowl, that's it. No butter or soy sauce... 146 00:07:10,568 --> 00:07:12,846 Enjoy your Maxim. You couldn't read that in Burma! 147 00:07:13,031 --> 00:07:14,831 - I'm freezing. - Me, too. 148 00:07:15,035 --> 00:07:17,108 Look at all these hypocrites passing by. 149 00:07:17,289 --> 00:07:19,487 Everyone claims to be so politically aware... 150 00:07:19,669 --> 00:07:21,708 but not one person can stop by for two seconds... 151 00:07:21,881 --> 00:07:23,156 to sign a stupid petition. 152 00:07:23,300 --> 00:07:26,295 - People suck. You all suck! - Paris, the rice! 153 00:07:26,557 --> 00:07:28,675 Great, we have one prop, and it's blowing away. 154 00:07:28,852 --> 00:07:30,854 - You knocked it over. - You put it in front of me. 155 00:07:30,898 --> 00:07:33,335 How was I to know you'd jump out of your seat like a maniac? 156 00:07:33,528 --> 00:07:35,508 You know me. You room with me. You should've known. 157 00:07:35,532 --> 00:07:38,811 - Hey, Rory, Paris. - Glenn, I'm so glad you stopped by... 158 00:07:39,038 --> 00:07:41,316 because this is an issue that affects every person... 159 00:07:41,501 --> 00:07:42,822 that has a heart and a soul. 160 00:07:42,962 --> 00:07:45,194 A great injustice is being perpetrated on our watch... 161 00:07:45,383 --> 00:07:46,987 and we've got to do something to stop it. 162 00:07:47,012 --> 00:07:48,282 Aren't you gonna sign the petition? 163 00:07:48,306 --> 00:07:51,027 No, I just needed a place to put my sandwich down. 164 00:07:52,313 --> 00:07:54,226 - Is that a raindrop? - Yep. 165 00:07:54,984 --> 00:07:56,259 - Out of the way. - Move! 166 00:07:56,404 --> 00:07:57,475 Is it raining? 167 00:07:57,615 --> 00:08:00,052 No, it's National Baptism Day. Tie your tubes, idiot. 168 00:08:01,371 --> 00:08:02,521 - Wet. - Cold. 169 00:08:04,628 --> 00:08:05,778 Go! 170 00:08:06,505 --> 00:08:07,826 - I get the radiator. - No way. 171 00:08:07,967 --> 00:08:09,404 - You got it last night. - I did not! 172 00:08:09,428 --> 00:08:10,907 You took up the whole thing with your... 173 00:08:10,931 --> 00:08:12,653 "Hey, Gore, do not endorse me" sweatshirt... 174 00:08:12,768 --> 00:08:14,209 and my blue sweater is still soaked. 175 00:08:14,312 --> 00:08:16,544 - Fine, take half. - Oh, my God, I'm cold! 176 00:08:16,733 --> 00:08:18,003 - Can't stop shaking. - We're wimps. 177 00:08:18,027 --> 00:08:19,781 We would last two seconds in Burma. 178 00:08:19,948 --> 00:08:23,069 - At least it's warm in Burma. - Yeah. Okay, we're horrible. 179 00:08:23,329 --> 00:08:25,651 This is the kind of cold you read about in a Dickens novel. 180 00:08:25,833 --> 00:08:28,145 We should be in a workhouse or shilling for Fagin. 181 00:08:28,338 --> 00:08:30,775 It's supposed to be spring. Why is it still cold? 182 00:08:30,968 --> 00:08:33,884 It's been the coldest winter in the history of winter. 183 00:08:34,182 --> 00:08:36,938 My brain, I think it's frozen. Is that possible? 184 00:08:37,146 --> 00:08:39,424 And these gray skies, it's a blanket of misery. 185 00:08:39,609 --> 00:08:43,128 All I can think about is getting warm. That's all I can think about. 186 00:08:43,366 --> 00:08:44,641 [Thunder rumbling] 187 00:08:47,416 --> 00:08:48,851 It's warm in Florida. 188 00:08:50,379 --> 00:08:51,859 - What? - Nothing. 189 00:08:52,174 --> 00:08:53,848 - Did you say Florida? - No. 190 00:08:54,721 --> 00:08:56,121 - Yes. - Seriously? 191 00:08:56,390 --> 00:08:58,224 - Maybe. - But it's spring break. 192 00:08:58,394 --> 00:09:00,033 - I know. - It's girls gone wild... 193 00:09:00,189 --> 00:09:01,259 and boys doing the twist. 194 00:09:01,400 --> 00:09:03,762 - Are we spring-breaky people? - I don't know what we are... 195 00:09:03,946 --> 00:09:06,224 but I am so cold that the thought of spending a week... 196 00:09:06,409 --> 00:09:08,811 with a bunch of drunken bimbos and rattle-headed frat boys... 197 00:09:08,955 --> 00:09:11,551 seems like a very good trade-off for being warm. 198 00:09:12,295 --> 00:09:13,445 Warm... 199 00:09:14,758 --> 00:09:15,908 Warm... 200 00:09:18,014 --> 00:09:19,847 Mom, where's my bathing suit? 201 00:09:20,518 --> 00:09:23,400 - Do you have a bathing suit? - Of course I have a bathing suit. 202 00:09:23,608 --> 00:09:26,409 - When was the last time you wore it? - I don't remember. 203 00:09:26,613 --> 00:09:29,335 - Did it involve a rubber ducky? - No. I don't think. 204 00:09:29,535 --> 00:09:32,177 Check the bottom drawer, and I will look in your closet. 205 00:09:32,374 --> 00:09:34,811 So now, tell me again. Who's driving? 206 00:09:35,004 --> 00:09:38,362 - Glenn. It's his mom's van. - And this Glenn, he's a good driver? 207 00:09:38,886 --> 00:09:41,323 - I have no idea. - Kid, you've got to learn to lie. 208 00:09:41,516 --> 00:09:43,714 Glenn's a very responsible guy. I'm sure it'll be fine. 209 00:09:43,895 --> 00:09:45,934 - And the place you're staying is safe? - Yes. 210 00:09:46,108 --> 00:09:48,465 Now you're catching on. Bathing suit! 211 00:09:48,696 --> 00:09:50,818 Now we just have to find the wimple that goes with it. 212 00:09:50,908 --> 00:09:52,343 Give me that, please. 213 00:09:52,495 --> 00:09:54,216 Was I supposed to clear this with you first? 214 00:09:54,331 --> 00:09:55,685 - Clear what with me? - Going away. 215 00:09:55,709 --> 00:09:56,825 I don't know. 216 00:09:56,961 --> 00:10:00,275 I mean, I don't live here anymore, so I'm not sure what the protocol is. 217 00:10:00,509 --> 00:10:02,104 I think as long as I know now... 218 00:10:02,263 --> 00:10:04,461 and I feel as if I have veto power, we're good. 219 00:10:04,642 --> 00:10:07,238 - You have veto power? - No, I feel as if I have veto power. 220 00:10:07,439 --> 00:10:08,881 - Very different statement. - Got it. 221 00:10:09,026 --> 00:10:10,867 You'll call me a lot while you're there, right? 222 00:10:10,903 --> 00:10:12,024 You're not worried, are you? 223 00:10:12,114 --> 00:10:14,517 Because I'm just going for the sun and to read, nothing more. 224 00:10:14,619 --> 00:10:15,655 I know. 225 00:10:15,788 --> 00:10:18,310 It's just, it's always the good kids who've never had a drink... 226 00:10:18,460 --> 00:10:20,738 that take one sip of Kahlua and fall out of a window. 227 00:10:20,922 --> 00:10:22,736 So you're sad you never taught me how to drink? 228 00:10:22,760 --> 00:10:23,222 Exactly. 229 00:10:23,234 --> 00:10:25,322 Grab a bottle and some quarters. Let's go. 230 00:10:25,514 --> 00:10:27,985 - No falling out of windows. - Not even a first-floor one. 231 00:10:28,186 --> 00:10:30,225 And don't drink. After you're done not drinking... 232 00:10:30,398 --> 00:10:32,550 drink tons of water and take two aspirins before bed. 233 00:10:32,736 --> 00:10:34,775 - Got it. - And take Paris with you everywhere. 234 00:10:34,948 --> 00:10:36,720 - Not much can happen with that girl along. - Got it. 235 00:10:36,744 --> 00:10:37,780 [Car horn honking] 236 00:10:37,913 --> 00:10:39,268 They're here. 237 00:10:39,665 --> 00:10:42,467 Maybe they can stop by a bathing-suit store along the way. 238 00:10:42,671 --> 00:10:45,028 - My suit is fine. - No, sure it is. 239 00:10:45,218 --> 00:10:48,019 It's nice to be able to go from the beach to the mosque... 240 00:10:48,224 --> 00:10:49,863 without having to change. 241 00:10:52,064 --> 00:10:55,697 - Seriously, Paris, get out! - No. I have to drive. 242 00:10:55,946 --> 00:10:57,788 You drive exactly like you look like you drive. 243 00:10:57,825 --> 00:10:59,470 - What's that mean? - You speed like a maniac. 244 00:10:59,494 --> 00:11:01,176 You zip in and out of lanes. You tailgate. 245 00:11:01,206 --> 00:11:03,848 - They were going two miles an hour. - It was a driving-school car. 246 00:11:03,961 --> 00:11:05,398 They went to school to learn a lesson. 247 00:11:05,422 --> 00:11:07,495 I was just giving them their money's worth. 248 00:11:07,676 --> 00:11:09,032 - Hey, guys. - Let's go. 249 00:11:09,179 --> 00:11:10,616 We're on a schedule. Get away from Glenn. 250 00:11:10,640 --> 00:11:13,077 - Thank God you're here. - Glenn, this is my mom. 251 00:11:13,270 --> 00:11:14,306 Hi, I'm Lorelai. 252 00:11:14,439 --> 00:11:16,398 Congratulations on being student of the month... 253 00:11:16,568 --> 00:11:18,766 - at the Grandville Middle School. - Thanks. 254 00:11:18,947 --> 00:11:21,099 - You looking forward to the beach? - Yes, I am. 255 00:11:21,285 --> 00:11:23,483 You don't have to show up in what you're going to wear. 256 00:11:23,664 --> 00:11:25,225 They let you change when you get there. 257 00:11:25,250 --> 00:11:26,925 - I'm not cold. - No, of course not. 258 00:11:27,087 --> 00:11:28,408 Could you? Thanks. 259 00:11:28,799 --> 00:11:31,554 - How come Paris is driving? - Are we going through this again? 260 00:11:31,763 --> 00:11:33,199 I didn't know you'd gone through it. 261 00:11:33,223 --> 00:11:35,305 I can't be in a car if anybody else is driving, okay? 262 00:11:35,352 --> 00:11:37,354 If I die in a car crash, it will be at my own hand. 263 00:11:37,482 --> 00:11:38,712 - Hi, Paris. - Hi, Lorelai. 264 00:11:38,859 --> 00:11:40,134 - Bye. No windows. - No windows. 265 00:11:40,278 --> 00:11:43,637 Glenn, would you mind if Rory sits up front? 266 00:11:43,869 --> 00:11:46,260 - She gets carsick. - Okay. 267 00:11:46,874 --> 00:11:48,070 Airbags. 268 00:11:48,961 --> 00:11:51,159 Okay have fun. Drive safely. 269 00:11:51,341 --> 00:11:53,778 Let's go, and say a prayer for the roadkill. 270 00:12:10,334 --> 00:12:11,974 You're a lunatic! 271 00:12:12,130 --> 00:12:14,772 I shaved three hours off the MapQuest estimate. 272 00:12:14,968 --> 00:12:16,690 How about a thank you? Who's in charge here? 273 00:12:16,847 --> 00:12:18,450 I'm guessing pink shirts and white shorts. 274 00:12:18,474 --> 00:12:20,316 I think my clothing choice has been vindicated. 275 00:12:20,478 --> 00:12:23,678 Swank attire and desperation for approval. The chicks are gonna eat you up. 276 00:12:23,901 --> 00:12:27,135 - It is warm. Are you feeling the warmth? - I'm definitely starting to thaw. 277 00:12:27,366 --> 00:12:29,564 - Name, please. - It's under Billings. 278 00:12:29,745 --> 00:12:32,421 Okay, we have you girls in Room 6. 279 00:12:32,626 --> 00:12:34,903 - Room 6. Okay. And what is your name? - Jack. 280 00:12:35,089 --> 00:12:38,129 Well, Jack, hello. I'm Paris, and this is Andrew. 281 00:12:38,344 --> 00:12:40,706 We want to make sure that we're getting your very best room. 282 00:12:40,892 --> 00:12:44,445 Actually, Room 9 has a better view, and it's closer to the ice machine. 283 00:12:44,690 --> 00:12:47,684 Let's go with nine. Now, who's gonna help with our bags? 284 00:12:48,071 --> 00:12:50,667 Good. Okay, those four bags. Rory, your book bag? 285 00:12:50,868 --> 00:12:51,904 Sure. 286 00:12:52,955 --> 00:12:54,674 - I'm gonna go for a run. - Now? 287 00:12:54,834 --> 00:12:56,394 Just a short one around the block. 288 00:12:56,545 --> 00:12:58,227 She looks so normal, and then that happens. 289 00:12:58,341 --> 00:12:59,377 Come on. 290 00:12:59,635 --> 00:13:01,913 Paris Geller, Room 9. Remember that. 291 00:13:02,097 --> 00:13:05,057 A lot of people make the mistake of tipping at the end of a trip. 292 00:13:05,270 --> 00:13:06,784 But I always tip as you go along. 293 00:13:06,940 --> 00:13:09,142 That way, they never know when the honey pot dries up... 294 00:13:09,277 --> 00:13:12,875 and it keeps them from going through your stuff and robbing you blind. 295 00:13:13,410 --> 00:13:15,608 Paris Geller, Room 9. Remember that. 296 00:13:16,834 --> 00:13:19,828 Man, look at that. We're right on the ocean. 297 00:13:20,047 --> 00:13:21,687 Paris, look at it. It's right there. 298 00:13:21,843 --> 00:13:25,362 I see it. We're in Room 9. 299 00:13:25,599 --> 00:13:28,594 Feel free to keep the sheets clean and the towels coming. 300 00:13:29,106 --> 00:13:30,906 Okay, not bad. 301 00:13:31,110 --> 00:13:34,185 You know what would be swell? A VCR to go with that television set. 302 00:13:34,408 --> 00:13:37,688 You mind? You're aces, pal, really. I'm giving the toast at your wedding. 303 00:13:37,914 --> 00:13:39,474 At least it doesn't smell bad in here. 304 00:13:39,625 --> 00:13:41,230 Pull your covers down and roll on the bed. 305 00:13:41,254 --> 00:13:42,290 Why? 306 00:13:42,423 --> 00:13:44,235 We are sharing this room with four other girls. 307 00:13:44,259 --> 00:13:46,341 Plus 10 K Barbie. We have to stake out our territory. 308 00:13:46,430 --> 00:13:48,184 Yes, and then we need to up your dosage. 309 00:13:48,350 --> 00:13:50,821 Look, a person comes in, they see a dent in the bed... 310 00:13:51,022 --> 00:13:54,063 - possibly a hair on the pillow. - So the person's David Caruso? 311 00:13:54,278 --> 00:13:55,423 They'll figure that bed is taken. 312 00:13:55,447 --> 00:13:57,288 They will move on to the couch or the rollaway. 313 00:13:57,366 --> 00:13:59,439 - That's insane. - Okay, suit yourself. 314 00:14:05,633 --> 00:14:08,195 And I was worried I would feel stupid. 315 00:14:08,387 --> 00:14:09,822 Stupid, but well rested. 316 00:14:09,973 --> 00:14:12,855 - How long do we have to do this? - I think we're good. 317 00:14:14,900 --> 00:14:17,621 - I'm really comfortable right now. - Yeah, me, too. 318 00:14:19,492 --> 00:14:20,693 Sounds like more are arriving. 319 00:14:20,744 --> 00:14:21,780 [Indistinct yelling] 320 00:14:21,913 --> 00:14:23,975 - Where are you going? - To see what all the ruckus is about. 321 00:14:23,999 --> 00:14:25,719 Wait for me. I like ruckus. 322 00:14:27,339 --> 00:14:29,855 Man, that's a lot of people stuffed in that tiny car. 323 00:14:30,053 --> 00:14:32,331 They should all be wearing Shriner hats. 324 00:14:33,518 --> 00:14:35,112 Hey. 325 00:14:36,523 --> 00:14:39,279 - That was subtle. - What are you talking about? 326 00:14:39,654 --> 00:14:42,125 - The Joanie Loves Chachi moment. - He said hey. 327 00:14:42,367 --> 00:14:43,688 - I heard. - I said hey back. 328 00:14:43,829 --> 00:14:45,184 - You did. - I was being polite. 329 00:14:45,331 --> 00:14:47,609 In Burma, you'd be married or brutally killed. 330 00:14:47,794 --> 00:14:49,229 I'm gonna go make your bed. 331 00:14:49,380 --> 00:14:51,339 Don't you dare. Man, I'm thirsty. 332 00:14:52,678 --> 00:14:53,714 Root beer? 333 00:14:55,475 --> 00:14:57,547 - Paris, that guy doesn't work here. - Not yet. 334 00:14:57,729 --> 00:15:00,724 But look at that mug of his. It's only a matter of time. 335 00:15:04,617 --> 00:15:06,417 - I overslept again. - I know. 336 00:15:06,579 --> 00:15:08,970 - Why didn't you get me up? - I tried, and you bit me. 337 00:15:09,167 --> 00:15:10,238 I did not bite you. 338 00:15:10,377 --> 00:15:14,090 - I did bite you. Cool! - Here, eat this before it gets cold. 339 00:15:14,385 --> 00:15:15,865 You made French toast? 340 00:15:16,013 --> 00:15:18,656 - I had a lot of energy after my run, so... - You went running? 341 00:15:18,852 --> 00:15:21,653 I had to wait for the laundry to dry, and I'd already read the papers. 342 00:15:21,857 --> 00:15:24,379 - You had an entire day before I woke up. - Here, you want bacon? 343 00:15:24,403 --> 00:15:25,439 You slaughtered a pig... 344 00:15:25,572 --> 00:15:27,052 between the running and the French toast? 345 00:15:27,076 --> 00:15:29,797 Yes, and by the way, that whole ozone-layer problem? 346 00:15:29,997 --> 00:15:32,388 - Taken care of. - You're my Green-Party hero. 347 00:15:32,586 --> 00:15:33,907 - Here. - Oh, no. Can't. 348 00:15:34,047 --> 00:15:36,330 I have to get to the printers and pick up the brochures... 349 00:15:36,426 --> 00:15:37,571 because today is mailing day. 350 00:15:37,595 --> 00:15:40,157 - But, do you have a Baggie? - Yeah, here. 351 00:15:40,475 --> 00:15:41,625 Perfect. 352 00:15:44,900 --> 00:15:46,255 [Exclaiming in pleasure] 353 00:15:49,117 --> 00:15:51,588 - What are you doing? - This is French toast on the go. 354 00:15:51,788 --> 00:15:53,861 The other drivers on the road love it. 355 00:15:54,042 --> 00:15:56,001 Come here. I'll call you later. 356 00:15:56,171 --> 00:15:58,289 - Okay. - We'll plan our weekend. 357 00:15:59,093 --> 00:16:01,052 Lorelai, hold on a second. 358 00:16:01,514 --> 00:16:02,585 Here. 359 00:16:02,725 --> 00:16:05,117 - Key. - Yeah, it's a key to the apartment. 360 00:16:06,733 --> 00:16:07,804 Good. 361 00:16:07,943 --> 00:16:10,904 - Do you want me to let someone in? - No, it's just an extra key. 362 00:16:11,116 --> 00:16:13,478 I thought, if you were coming over and I was running late... 363 00:16:13,662 --> 00:16:15,814 this way, you didn't have to wait in the hallway. 364 00:16:16,000 --> 00:16:18,391 - Okay. - Or if you were carrying something... 365 00:16:18,588 --> 00:16:20,550 and you couldn't wait for me to get to the door... 366 00:16:20,592 --> 00:16:21,867 this way, you're all set. 367 00:16:22,011 --> 00:16:23,890 Okay, good. Makes sense. 368 00:16:24,057 --> 00:16:26,219 Yeah, it's just a practical thing. It's not a big deal. 369 00:16:26,311 --> 00:16:27,905 - Good. - Or you don't have to take it. 370 00:16:28,064 --> 00:16:30,103 - No, I'll take it. - I mean, I know how it is. 371 00:16:30,276 --> 00:16:32,474 You've got your keys on your ring just so... 372 00:16:32,655 --> 00:16:35,137 and then you put in a new one, it throws off the whole balance. 373 00:16:35,328 --> 00:16:37,047 - If you think... - Or you can keep it. 374 00:16:37,206 --> 00:16:38,561 - You sure? - If you want. 375 00:16:38,708 --> 00:16:40,701 - I can go either way. - It's fine with me. 376 00:16:40,879 --> 00:16:42,872 - Well, which way? - Either way. 377 00:16:43,092 --> 00:16:44,333 [Chuckling] I'll take it, okay? 378 00:16:44,427 --> 00:16:47,741 - Thanks for the French toast. - Thanks for the hand injury. 379 00:16:47,975 --> 00:16:50,207 Anytime. Bye. 380 00:16:54,363 --> 00:16:55,434 Go! 381 00:16:55,573 --> 00:16:57,964 PARIS: Here, we're over here. RORY: How did we get a tent? 382 00:16:58,161 --> 00:17:00,757 - Toby, again. Classic tip whore. - Which one's Toby? 383 00:17:00,959 --> 00:17:03,475 The one with the bandaged hand. He cut it setting this up. 384 00:17:03,672 --> 00:17:07,305 - I popped him another sawbuck. - Cool tent! How'd we get it? 385 00:17:07,554 --> 00:17:08,625 Stay ignorant, Glenn. 386 00:17:08,764 --> 00:17:11,235 It comes with the oppressive guilt of the ruling class. 387 00:17:11,437 --> 00:17:13,588 Okay. Hey, Janet, I like your suit. 388 00:17:14,024 --> 00:17:17,018 - Thanks, Glenn. - Hey, hot dogs. 389 00:17:17,448 --> 00:17:19,122 Man, it is so loud out here. 390 00:17:19,284 --> 00:17:21,004 You never think of the beach as being loud. 391 00:17:21,163 --> 00:17:24,397 You do when there's a band of Huns reenacting Top Gun in back of you. 392 00:17:24,627 --> 00:17:27,098 - Hey, throw it back. - No! 393 00:17:27,299 --> 00:17:29,292 - What are you doing? - Putting a towel down. 394 00:17:29,470 --> 00:17:31,986 - Don't. - Why? We have 100 towels in the room. 395 00:17:32,225 --> 00:17:34,787 There's so many towels, there's basically no room for us. 396 00:17:34,980 --> 00:17:37,622 - I need my ball. - You need a couple of them, pal. 397 00:17:38,070 --> 00:17:40,427 Here. Ignore her. She likes it. 398 00:17:40,908 --> 00:17:43,629 - Rory, stop. - I'm not gonna sit in the sand, Paris. 399 00:17:43,872 --> 00:17:44,907 Over here. 400 00:17:46,752 --> 00:17:47,868 Great, okay. 401 00:17:48,547 --> 00:17:49,582 Thanks. 402 00:17:50,092 --> 00:17:52,927 Now, we're going to need a fruit plate in about an hour... 403 00:17:53,139 --> 00:17:55,177 and keep the iced tea coming. 404 00:17:57,230 --> 00:17:59,143 - What? - Nothing but admiration here. 405 00:17:59,317 --> 00:18:01,150 I'm going to go do my laps in the ocean. 406 00:18:01,321 --> 00:18:04,163 - You work out on spring break? - Exercise is a high. You should try it. 407 00:18:04,326 --> 00:18:06,848 - Sure, I'll meet you out there. - Are you properly sunscreened? 408 00:18:06,914 --> 00:18:09,156 Ten minutes in the sun can cause irreparable skin damage. 409 00:18:09,210 --> 00:18:11,172 And constant shoulder tension creates a hunchback. 410 00:18:11,297 --> 00:18:13,575 Fine, go. I hear melanoma is very in this year. 411 00:18:13,760 --> 00:18:15,514 Here, Casper, you'd better use this. 412 00:18:15,681 --> 00:18:17,563 You're just lucky you have a fruit plate coming. 413 00:18:18,770 --> 00:18:20,648 Rory, Paris! Oh, my God! 414 00:18:20,815 --> 00:18:21,886 Hello, babies. 415 00:18:22,025 --> 00:18:24,018 - Unbelievable. - What are you guys doing here? 416 00:18:24,196 --> 00:18:26,318 - Spring break! - We came for Tulane's spring break... 417 00:18:26,409 --> 00:18:27,930 - and just stayed. - We've been here a month. 418 00:18:27,954 --> 00:18:30,345 - Great lifeguards. - I'm so excited to see you guys. 419 00:18:30,542 --> 00:18:32,899 Paris, you missed a spot. I can see skin. 420 00:18:33,380 --> 00:18:34,735 So, when did you get here? 421 00:18:34,884 --> 00:18:37,446 - 2:00 this morning. - I love 2:00 in the morning. 422 00:18:37,638 --> 00:18:40,440 - You guys are having a good time? - Way better than most other people. 423 00:18:40,518 --> 00:18:41,589 We're very competitive. 424 00:18:41,729 --> 00:18:43,771 It took a few weeks to get the right routine down... 425 00:18:43,858 --> 00:18:44,929 but now we own this town. 426 00:18:45,068 --> 00:18:46,548 The Chamber of Commerce must be thrilled. 427 00:18:46,572 --> 00:18:47,759 I think the last place on earth... 428 00:18:47,783 --> 00:18:50,145 I would ever expect to find Paris Geller is at spring break. 429 00:18:50,329 --> 00:18:51,365 I'm up for new things. 430 00:18:51,498 --> 00:18:53,331 Then we have to make sure you do this right. 431 00:18:53,502 --> 00:18:55,904 - There are rules. - There always are in a civilized society. 432 00:18:56,089 --> 00:18:58,765 It is very important to find the right hot club every night... 433 00:18:58,969 --> 00:19:00,040 and it changes. 434 00:19:00,180 --> 00:19:01,855 What was hot last night is not tonight. 435 00:19:02,017 --> 00:19:04,169 Adjust your sleeping patterns for maximum partying. 436 00:19:04,355 --> 00:19:06,917 Mid-to-late-afternoon sleeping allows the best all-night stamina. 437 00:19:07,109 --> 00:19:08,305 Okay. You got that, Paris? 438 00:19:08,445 --> 00:19:09,887 Were we really friends at one point? 439 00:19:10,032 --> 00:19:12,674 They do card at the clubs, but there's a million ways around it. 440 00:19:12,870 --> 00:19:14,151 - Major flirting. - A sexy voice. 441 00:19:14,289 --> 00:19:15,645 And if all that fails, make out. 442 00:19:15,793 --> 00:19:16,864 - With who? - Each other. 443 00:19:17,003 --> 00:19:18,074 - Excuse me? - We found... 444 00:19:18,214 --> 00:19:20,296 if we kiss each other, we can get anything from guys. 445 00:19:20,343 --> 00:19:21,459 Free drinks, food. 446 00:19:21,595 --> 00:19:24,396 - T-shirts, boat rides, Frisbees. - Earrings, sea-do's. 447 00:19:24,642 --> 00:19:26,442 Okay. That is a good tip. 448 00:19:26,604 --> 00:19:28,597 Yeah, maybe later I'll pants you for an Altoid. 449 00:19:28,775 --> 00:19:30,494 - Where are you staying? - The Sea Sprite. 450 00:19:30,654 --> 00:19:32,726 - That's cute. - We've made out there. 451 00:19:33,492 --> 00:19:34,927 Louise, it's 1:00. 452 00:19:35,162 --> 00:19:38,203 - We've got to go get to bed. - We'll come see you tonight. 453 00:19:38,836 --> 00:19:39,871 Hey, guys. 454 00:19:41,841 --> 00:19:44,232 I liked the pants-you-for-an-Altoid thing. 455 00:19:46,558 --> 00:19:47,788 Oh, my God, I'm starving. 456 00:19:47,935 --> 00:19:49,897 I can't believe what a great video store that was. 457 00:19:49,939 --> 00:19:52,012 A little research before a trip always helps. 458 00:19:52,194 --> 00:19:53,994 Pizza and The Power Of Myth. 459 00:19:56,034 --> 00:19:57,788 A perfect evening. 460 00:19:58,371 --> 00:19:59,442 What? 461 00:19:59,582 --> 00:20:01,464 Nothing. Just checking the messages, that's all. 462 00:20:01,628 --> 00:20:04,749 - You're expecting a call from Asher? - No, I'm not expecting a call. 463 00:20:04,967 --> 00:20:07,928 He's at a conference in Denver, so I'm not expecting a call. 464 00:20:08,140 --> 00:20:09,461 I mean, he knows I'm here... 465 00:20:09,601 --> 00:20:11,884 and I left him a contact number, in case of emergencies... 466 00:20:12,064 --> 00:20:14,023 but not expecting a call. 467 00:20:19,578 --> 00:20:22,049 God, I love this. I've seen it four times. 468 00:20:22,250 --> 00:20:23,571 - Five. - Seriously? 469 00:20:23,710 --> 00:20:24,746 It was almost six... 470 00:20:24,879 --> 00:20:26,761 but my mom tried to be funny one day and hid it. 471 00:20:26,925 --> 00:20:30,364 - I thought you and your mom got along? - Even we have our dark periods. 472 00:20:30,598 --> 00:20:31,794 [People cheering] 473 00:20:31,934 --> 00:20:34,325 - It sounds like quite a party out there. - Yep. 474 00:20:34,523 --> 00:20:36,356 I think someone just got thrown in the pool. 475 00:20:36,526 --> 00:20:39,487 I hope it's the guy who took my $5 and never bought me a root beer. 476 00:20:39,699 --> 00:20:41,134 This is a good song. 477 00:20:41,452 --> 00:20:44,412 - Okay, I'm sorry. Are we doing this right? - Doing what right? 478 00:20:44,624 --> 00:20:45,660 Spring break. 479 00:20:45,793 --> 00:20:48,230 We're in here alone with Joseph Campbell and Bill Moyers... 480 00:20:48,424 --> 00:20:49,984 and everyone else is out there with... 481 00:20:50,135 --> 00:20:51,695 - Everyone else? - Yeah. 482 00:20:51,889 --> 00:20:53,847 But, we love Bill Moyers. 483 00:20:54,017 --> 00:20:57,730 Yes, we do love Bill Moyers. But we did come here for spring break... 484 00:20:58,233 --> 00:21:00,829 and I'm just wondering if we're not spring-breaking... 485 00:21:01,030 --> 00:21:02,670 the way you're supposed to spring-break. 486 00:21:02,825 --> 00:21:03,896 You're probably right. 487 00:21:04,036 --> 00:21:06,188 I mean, if we're here, we should probably commit. 488 00:21:06,373 --> 00:21:09,892 - Try to experience the entire event. - With other people, outside this room. 489 00:21:10,130 --> 00:21:12,567 Okay. Let's do it. Let's commit. 490 00:21:12,886 --> 00:21:14,924 - Okay. Starting now? - Starting now. 491 00:21:16,935 --> 00:21:18,415 [Boys yelling] 492 00:21:21,860 --> 00:21:23,933 - Tomorrow's fine, too. - Absolutely. 493 00:21:26,577 --> 00:21:28,619 MAN: [On TV] ...historical atlas of world mythology. 494 00:21:28,790 --> 00:21:30,749 His effort to bring under one roof... 495 00:21:30,919 --> 00:21:33,231 the spiritual and intellectual wisdom of a lifetime. 496 00:21:36,763 --> 00:21:40,236 - I got $5 on the blond with the tattoo. - You always go for the tattoos. 497 00:21:40,478 --> 00:21:41,514 God, I'm starving. 498 00:21:41,647 --> 00:21:43,640 I haven't had anything but vending-machine junk. 499 00:21:43,818 --> 00:21:45,139 There's nothing around here. 500 00:21:45,279 --> 00:21:47,637 I would kill for something non-synthetic. 501 00:21:48,034 --> 00:21:49,070 [Exclaiming] 502 00:21:49,203 --> 00:21:50,274 Perfect. 503 00:21:50,789 --> 00:21:52,748 Okay, forget I said giant Q-Tips. 504 00:21:52,918 --> 00:21:54,840 They're not hitting each other with giant Q-Tips. 505 00:21:55,047 --> 00:21:56,929 But now I can't get giant Q-Tips out of my head. 506 00:21:57,010 --> 00:21:58,091 It's too powerful a visual. 507 00:21:58,220 --> 00:21:59,700 I know, I'm sorry. 508 00:21:59,848 --> 00:22:01,727 - So how is it? - It's good so far. 509 00:22:01,977 --> 00:22:04,209 - Yeah, how good? - I haven't had a drink yet. 510 00:22:04,398 --> 00:22:06,079 Okay, are you sure you weren't drinking... 511 00:22:06,192 --> 00:22:08,709 and that's why you think they're giant Q-Tips? 512 00:22:10,242 --> 00:22:11,278 Maybe. 513 00:22:12,204 --> 00:22:13,245 Hello? What just happened? 514 00:22:16,378 --> 00:22:18,500 You sound distracted. Did something cute just walk by? 515 00:22:19,801 --> 00:22:22,317 No, I was just trying to think of something better... 516 00:22:22,515 --> 00:22:24,872 to describe the giant Q-Tips. 517 00:22:25,062 --> 00:22:26,823 - So I'll call you later, okay? - No windows. 518 00:22:26,939 --> 00:22:28,055 No windows. 519 00:22:33,535 --> 00:22:34,571 What? 520 00:22:34,788 --> 00:22:36,827 - Excellent taste. - What's his name? 521 00:22:37,125 --> 00:22:39,403 - Whose name? - The guy you were just staring at. 522 00:22:39,588 --> 00:22:41,263 - I wasn't staring. - Oh, no. 523 00:22:42,678 --> 00:22:44,637 - The twins. - God, they're everywhere. 524 00:22:44,807 --> 00:22:46,606 - So? - We can't compete against twins. 525 00:22:46,768 --> 00:22:49,125 Especially once they caught on to the whole kissing thing. 526 00:22:49,315 --> 00:22:51,517 - Let's find another pool. - We'll see you guys tonight. 527 00:22:51,569 --> 00:22:52,640 Okay. 528 00:22:54,700 --> 00:22:57,137 Why don't you go get us something at the bar? 529 00:22:58,248 --> 00:23:00,526 - What? - Then you can go talk to that guy. 530 00:23:03,925 --> 00:23:05,520 - That's okay. - Come on, go. 531 00:23:05,679 --> 00:23:08,993 Flirting seems to be a very big part of this spring-break ritual, and I'm taken. 532 00:23:09,227 --> 00:23:10,263 I can't flirt. 533 00:23:10,396 --> 00:23:12,674 I have to live vicariously through you. 534 00:23:13,067 --> 00:23:14,616 MAN: [On loudspeaker] The banana-eating 535 00:23:14,628 --> 00:23:16,430 contest is about to start on the upper level. 536 00:23:16,532 --> 00:23:19,128 - Real food. Thank God. - Paris. 537 00:23:33,104 --> 00:23:36,020 Do you know what those things are called... 538 00:23:36,235 --> 00:23:38,706 that they hit each other in the pool with? 539 00:23:39,116 --> 00:23:40,231 No, I don't. 540 00:23:42,080 --> 00:23:43,310 Just wondering. 541 00:23:44,501 --> 00:23:47,177 - Did I lose points for that? - No, no points lost. 542 00:23:47,382 --> 00:23:48,817 Sean, man, come on! 543 00:23:48,967 --> 00:23:50,801 Coming. See you. 544 00:23:51,597 --> 00:23:53,795 Okay. See you. 545 00:23:54,311 --> 00:23:56,782 Excuse me for thinking a banana-eating contest... 546 00:23:56,982 --> 00:23:58,656 was about eating a banana! 547 00:24:00,697 --> 00:24:02,291 [Singing So Says I] 548 00:25:55,620 --> 00:25:57,693 - You guys want something? - Maybe later. 549 00:25:57,874 --> 00:25:59,070 We'll be back. 550 00:26:23,338 --> 00:26:24,454 Oh, my God. 551 00:26:35,193 --> 00:26:36,309 Wow. Quite a scene. 552 00:26:36,445 --> 00:26:38,518 Yeah, I guess we found the hot place tonight. 553 00:26:38,700 --> 00:26:41,262 Yep, no one can sniff out the hip like we can. 554 00:26:41,789 --> 00:26:43,508 Okay, so, here we are. 555 00:26:44,294 --> 00:26:46,606 - We should do something. - What? 556 00:26:46,798 --> 00:26:49,474 - I don't know. - We could dance. 557 00:26:49,679 --> 00:26:52,116 Dance? Okay, sure. Let's dance. 558 00:26:52,350 --> 00:26:53,750 Okay, let's dance. 559 00:26:56,441 --> 00:26:57,717 - This is fun. - Yep. 560 00:27:00,657 --> 00:27:03,048 - I think your husband's here. - What? Where? 561 00:27:06,418 --> 00:27:09,139 - Why don't you go buy him a drink? - What, like a nice ginger ale? 562 00:27:09,341 --> 00:27:11,698 You could get Madeline and Louise to buy a drink for you... 563 00:27:11,887 --> 00:27:14,085 and then you could go bring it to him. 564 00:27:24,786 --> 00:27:27,018 Well, that was the shortest relationship ever. 565 00:27:27,207 --> 00:27:29,564 - What? - He looked, he saw, he changed his mind. 566 00:27:29,753 --> 00:27:30,789 Sorry. 567 00:27:40,022 --> 00:27:42,174 - Okay, what is going on here? - What? 568 00:27:42,527 --> 00:27:46,046 Why is every single person in this place having a better time than we are? 569 00:27:46,284 --> 00:27:48,436 - I don't know that they are. - Look around. 570 00:27:48,621 --> 00:27:51,343 Every single person in this place is having a better time than us. 571 00:27:51,544 --> 00:27:54,140 Why? I mean, we've been doing everything everybody else is. 572 00:27:54,340 --> 00:27:57,415 - We're here in the hot place. - So we're not great dancers. 573 00:27:57,722 --> 00:28:00,193 We did the hanging-out-at-the-pool part pretty well. 574 00:28:00,394 --> 00:28:01,590 We're not trying hard enough. 575 00:28:01,730 --> 00:28:03,642 What are you talking about? This is not a test. 576 00:28:03,817 --> 00:28:06,811 We came here to do spring break, and we are going to do spring break. 577 00:28:07,031 --> 00:28:09,183 What else do you suggest we do? 578 00:28:10,621 --> 00:28:13,935 - What are you doing? Are you crazy? - Madeline and Louise do it. 579 00:28:14,169 --> 00:28:17,085 Madeline and Louise wear their underwear outside of their clothes. 580 00:28:17,300 --> 00:28:19,179 I don't want to do what Madeline and Louise do. 581 00:28:19,346 --> 00:28:21,187 - I just thought... - Just stop thinking, okay? 582 00:28:21,266 --> 00:28:23,144 Your thinking is very, very dangerous. 583 00:28:23,311 --> 00:28:25,153 - Rory. - Get away from me. You're not my type. 584 00:28:25,190 --> 00:28:26,864 - Will you just wait? - What? 585 00:28:27,152 --> 00:28:28,223 - How was I? - What? 586 00:28:28,363 --> 00:28:29,923 - As a kisser? - Oh, man! 587 00:28:30,074 --> 00:28:31,235 I've always wanted to know... 588 00:28:31,368 --> 00:28:33,490 and you can't ask a guy. That shows low self esteem... 589 00:28:33,664 --> 00:28:34,975 which I've read is really not sexy. 590 00:28:34,999 --> 00:28:37,881 So tell me. How am I? Too stiff? Do I need to relax my lips a little... 591 00:28:38,089 --> 00:28:40,207 maybe open my mouth more, make it more inviting? 592 00:28:40,385 --> 00:28:43,858 - I need some fresh air. - Hey, where are you going? 593 00:28:44,141 --> 00:28:46,054 - Outside. - Can I come with you? 594 00:28:46,604 --> 00:28:49,360 - Maybe your girlfriend wants to come, too. - My girlfriend? 595 00:28:49,568 --> 00:28:52,323 - I gotta tell you, that was some kiss. - Oh, my God! 596 00:28:54,285 --> 00:28:57,406 The movie was good. Nice to see Michael Caine working again. 597 00:28:58,292 --> 00:29:02,176 Which was sarcastic because he works a lot... 598 00:29:03,594 --> 00:29:04,665 constantly. 599 00:29:04,805 --> 00:29:07,117 Never says no to anything, which can be risky, you know? 600 00:29:07,310 --> 00:29:09,747 - Lowers your batting average. - Well, I'm glad you liked it. 601 00:29:09,939 --> 00:29:13,538 Jason, you're making me work too hard tonight. 602 00:29:13,780 --> 00:29:17,492 - I know. - I mean, I wore the cute boots, you know? 603 00:29:17,746 --> 00:29:19,705 - Do you see the cute boots? - Very cute boots. 604 00:29:19,875 --> 00:29:21,957 I had a full night, what with the walking straight... 605 00:29:22,087 --> 00:29:23,929 the balancing, and the not yelping out in pain. 606 00:29:24,091 --> 00:29:26,448 If I'd known I'd also have to do all the talking, I'd... 607 00:29:26,637 --> 00:29:29,028 - I think I did it wrong. - You did what wrong? 608 00:29:29,225 --> 00:29:32,107 - The key that I gave you. - The key to your apartment? 609 00:29:32,357 --> 00:29:35,910 - The key was supposed to say something. - So it's a talking key. 610 00:29:36,155 --> 00:29:38,956 Look, you and I are hitting that point in a relationship... 611 00:29:39,161 --> 00:29:41,312 where I usually break it off. 612 00:29:42,626 --> 00:29:44,379 Well, should we get a cake? 613 00:29:45,339 --> 00:29:48,299 Every single time, with every other woman I've been involved with... 614 00:29:48,512 --> 00:29:50,790 - this is about the time that I would... - Bolt? 615 00:29:50,974 --> 00:29:54,208 I was gonna say run, but bolt sounds much more masculine... 616 00:29:54,439 --> 00:29:55,874 so yeah, sure, bolt. 617 00:29:56,109 --> 00:29:57,589 Well, it's time to bolt. 618 00:29:57,737 --> 00:30:00,174 Okay, good thing you're not wearing my boots. 619 00:30:00,367 --> 00:30:02,857 I don't think I'm doing this right, either. 620 00:30:02,869 --> 00:30:04,649 No, you're doing it just fine. 621 00:30:04,917 --> 00:30:06,147 It's cold, so... 622 00:30:06,294 --> 00:30:09,574 The other night, I woke up, and the timer went off in my head: 623 00:30:09,801 --> 00:30:13,081 "Hey, buddy, it's about that time." So I did what I always do. 624 00:30:13,307 --> 00:30:14,787 I thought about you, about us... 625 00:30:14,935 --> 00:30:17,087 and I thought about all the things that bother me... 626 00:30:17,273 --> 00:30:20,189 and I came up with nothing. 627 00:30:20,989 --> 00:30:24,906 - Nothing? - I went over it and over it in my head. 628 00:30:25,581 --> 00:30:29,214 That feeling, that I-want-out feeling... 629 00:30:29,463 --> 00:30:30,499 it wasn't there. 630 00:30:30,631 --> 00:30:34,184 What was there was the very strong sense that if I did... 631 00:30:34,973 --> 00:30:36,123 bolt... 632 00:30:36,267 --> 00:30:38,545 I might as well go out and find a pointy hat... 633 00:30:38,730 --> 00:30:40,803 a stool, and a classroom full of sixth graders... 634 00:30:40,984 --> 00:30:44,298 because I'd be an absolute idiot to screw this up. 635 00:30:44,532 --> 00:30:48,734 - So I went out and made the key. - The talking key. 636 00:30:49,374 --> 00:30:52,768 And I was hoping that the key would say that this is different... 637 00:30:53,006 --> 00:30:57,049 and that I want you in my life a lot more than you are now. 638 00:30:57,598 --> 00:30:59,671 Wow. Well... 639 00:31:00,562 --> 00:31:04,354 I mean, it would have been more interesting to hear that from the key... 640 00:31:04,653 --> 00:31:07,728 it's definitely more romantic hearing it from you. 641 00:31:14,380 --> 00:31:16,851 I'm gonna go take care of Mr. Caine for you now. 642 00:31:17,051 --> 00:31:19,203 - I would appreciate that. - Good night. 643 00:31:19,556 --> 00:31:20,911 Good night, Jason. 644 00:31:32,621 --> 00:31:34,216 [On answering machine] Hey, It's Luke. 645 00:31:34,375 --> 00:31:35,976 I'm sorry to be calling you like this... 646 00:31:36,003 --> 00:31:38,045 but I was wondering if, when you get this message... 647 00:31:38,132 --> 00:31:40,284 if you could come pick me up because I need a ride. 648 00:31:40,470 --> 00:31:43,225 I'm in Litchfield, the corner of Mason and Pine. 649 00:31:43,434 --> 00:31:44,515 It's a big, white building. 650 00:31:44,644 --> 00:31:46,876 You'll recognize it by the police sign outside... 651 00:31:47,065 --> 00:31:49,183 because, oh, hell, I'm in jail. 652 00:31:49,779 --> 00:31:51,339 Okay, there. I said it. Long story. 653 00:31:51,491 --> 00:31:53,172 I'll tell you when you get here. Thanks... 654 00:31:53,285 --> 00:31:55,437 if you come. One more thing. 655 00:31:55,623 --> 00:31:57,935 I need to borrow a little money, $300. 656 00:31:58,211 --> 00:32:01,684 It's just a loan, and, oh, hell, it's for my bail. 657 00:32:01,968 --> 00:32:03,960 I'm getting off now! Relax! 658 00:32:06,936 --> 00:32:09,578 I think the two of you would make a great couple. 659 00:32:09,774 --> 00:32:11,494 - No way. - Why not? 660 00:32:11,653 --> 00:32:13,612 You're way too high maintenance for me. 661 00:32:13,782 --> 00:32:15,934 The whole place was buzzing about the kiss. 662 00:32:16,119 --> 00:32:19,592 - Even the twins were jealous. - Super, great. Love to hear that. 663 00:32:20,085 --> 00:32:22,887 Who needs more? Everybody? Good. I'll be right back. 664 00:32:24,718 --> 00:32:27,109 So, Paris, how's the Princeton man? 665 00:32:27,306 --> 00:32:30,062 - Jaime and I broke up. - Paris has a different man now. 666 00:32:30,271 --> 00:32:32,105 - You do? - I'm dating a professor. 667 00:32:32,275 --> 00:32:33,675 - Tenured? - Ages ago. 668 00:32:33,819 --> 00:32:35,573 [Chuckling] Well, Anna Nicole, look at you. 669 00:32:35,739 --> 00:32:38,779 He's brilliant, a writer, very distinguished, handsome. 670 00:32:38,996 --> 00:32:41,592 - Don't you think he's handsome? - Handsome. Sure, very handsome. 671 00:32:41,792 --> 00:32:44,468 He's a real man. He's just so amazing. 672 00:32:44,672 --> 00:32:46,354 I still can't believe that we're together. 673 00:32:46,509 --> 00:32:48,548 I made them a little stronger this time. 674 00:32:48,722 --> 00:32:51,113 Cool, it'll be fun to watch the cups dissolve. 675 00:32:51,310 --> 00:32:54,146 - Paris bagged herself an older man. - I love older men. 676 00:32:54,357 --> 00:32:56,031 They take you to the best restaurants. 677 00:32:56,194 --> 00:32:57,948 He went to a conference in Denver this week. 678 00:32:58,114 --> 00:33:01,235 He was so nice, you know. Really excited about me coming to Florida. 679 00:33:01,454 --> 00:33:04,209 He thinks it's a good idea to hang out with people my own age. 680 00:33:04,417 --> 00:33:06,099 I kind of hoped that he would invite me... 681 00:33:06,213 --> 00:33:08,775 to go to Denver with him, but, you know, he didn't. 682 00:33:08,967 --> 00:33:11,530 - He had to work, Paris. - I know, or he's sick of me. 683 00:33:11,723 --> 00:33:12,759 No. 684 00:33:13,267 --> 00:33:15,419 Maybe he's going to dump me. 685 00:33:15,605 --> 00:33:18,566 - Does he still buy you jewelry? - He's never bought me jewelry. 686 00:33:18,778 --> 00:33:20,577 He hasn't? How much money does he have? 687 00:33:20,739 --> 00:33:22,698 - Asher isn't rich. - Not rich? 688 00:33:22,868 --> 00:33:24,907 Curiouser and curiouser. 689 00:33:25,081 --> 00:33:27,199 You're just being paranoid. He wants you to have fun. 690 00:33:27,377 --> 00:33:30,133 Someone who wants you to have fun is someone who cares about you... 691 00:33:30,341 --> 00:33:31,377 both of you... 692 00:33:31,510 --> 00:33:34,231 because there are two of you, and they're spinning. 693 00:33:35,392 --> 00:33:36,428 Hidden punch. 694 00:33:36,561 --> 00:33:38,600 Just keep me away from any windows, please. 695 00:33:38,773 --> 00:33:40,535 Whatever happened to that boyfriend of yours? 696 00:33:40,652 --> 00:33:42,132 - Who, Jess? - No. 697 00:33:42,363 --> 00:33:44,163 - Dean. - Dean, that's it. 698 00:33:44,826 --> 00:33:47,503 How's Dean? God, he was gorgeous. 699 00:33:47,873 --> 00:33:49,912 - He's fine. - Is he still gorgeous? 700 00:33:50,336 --> 00:33:53,934 - Yes. Definitely, yes. - You two aren't together? 701 00:33:54,176 --> 00:33:56,738 - No, actually he's married. - What? 702 00:33:56,932 --> 00:33:58,003 Why? 703 00:33:58,143 --> 00:34:01,103 Well, he met Lindsay, and they got married. 704 00:34:01,315 --> 00:34:03,992 She's pretty, blond, tall, leggy. 705 00:34:04,237 --> 00:34:06,913 Good, just what the world needs. Another one of those. 706 00:34:07,117 --> 00:34:09,110 - She's nice, too. - Prediction. 707 00:34:09,288 --> 00:34:10,769 - She's psychic. - Since when? 708 00:34:10,917 --> 00:34:13,752 Since about six months ago. I think it's not gonna last. 709 00:34:13,963 --> 00:34:17,322 Two married 19-year-olds won't make it. Boy, that's a risky bet. 710 00:34:17,553 --> 00:34:19,995 I think it won't last because he was way too in love with you. 711 00:34:20,184 --> 00:34:22,153 But we've been broken up for a long time. 712 00:34:22,165 --> 00:34:24,146 But he only had eyes for you, girlfriend. 713 00:34:24,399 --> 00:34:28,111 - And deep, long, soulful Rory-eyes. - No, not anymore. 714 00:34:28,366 --> 00:34:32,124 - You don't talk at all anymore? - No, we still talk. We're still friends. 715 00:34:32,373 --> 00:34:34,605 Yes, you are. Cell-phone friends. 716 00:34:34,794 --> 00:34:37,185 You have your ex-boyfriend's number in your cell phone? 717 00:34:37,382 --> 00:34:40,981 - I told you we were friends. - First loves are very intense. 718 00:34:41,223 --> 00:34:43,215 My mom's still in love with her first love. 719 00:34:43,394 --> 00:34:46,195 She tells my father that over and over and... 720 00:34:46,691 --> 00:34:48,570 I think I just dialed his number. 721 00:34:48,736 --> 00:34:50,809 - Madeline, no! - Oh, my God, it's ringing! 722 00:34:50,991 --> 00:34:52,027 Hang up! 723 00:34:52,159 --> 00:34:54,437 It's his voice mail. Sexy voice. 724 00:34:54,622 --> 00:34:57,458 - Hang up. - I think it's gonna... It beeped. 725 00:34:58,588 --> 00:35:02,824 - Talk. - [Laughing nervously] Dean, hi. It's Rory. 726 00:35:03,097 --> 00:35:05,898 I'm sorry to call you like this, but we're on spring break... 727 00:35:06,102 --> 00:35:09,735 and I don't know if you remember Madeline and Louise... 728 00:35:10,027 --> 00:35:13,260 but they're evil, and we were just talking about you. 729 00:35:14,534 --> 00:35:16,926 Hi. How are you? 730 00:35:17,832 --> 00:35:20,554 I'm gonna hang up now, so bye. Sorry, bye. 731 00:35:21,130 --> 00:35:22,644 I'm going to kill you! 732 00:35:22,842 --> 00:35:26,884 Oh, my God, I'm so gonna kill you! It's going to be bad and deathlike, and... 733 00:35:27,183 --> 00:35:29,222 I'm gonna go for a walk because this punch... 734 00:35:29,395 --> 00:35:31,866 - is starting to live up to its name. - I'll go with you. 735 00:35:32,068 --> 00:35:34,505 Don't move, because I'm going to come back to kill you. 736 00:35:34,697 --> 00:35:35,893 We'll be here. 737 00:35:39,373 --> 00:35:40,887 There. My truck. 738 00:35:50,393 --> 00:35:54,356 You know, Luke, you don't have to tell me what happened, unless you want to. 739 00:35:54,985 --> 00:35:59,267 But I promise I won't ask you about it again... 740 00:35:59,827 --> 00:36:02,265 ever, in this lifetime or the next. 741 00:36:04,043 --> 00:36:06,241 You know, I'll just tell Shirley MacLaine: 742 00:36:06,423 --> 00:36:07,744 "Hey, look, back off, Shirl." 743 00:36:07,883 --> 00:36:09,523 "If Luke had wanted me to know..." 744 00:36:09,679 --> 00:36:11,991 "He would have told me back in my other lifetime..." 745 00:36:12,183 --> 00:36:13,328 "And I certainly don't expect..." 746 00:36:13,352 --> 00:36:15,311 I wanted to see who owned the socks. 747 00:36:15,481 --> 00:36:17,474 - And did you? - I think so. 748 00:36:18,863 --> 00:36:20,981 I just had a feeling tonight. 749 00:36:21,200 --> 00:36:25,402 Nicole was kind of vague on her plans, so I told her I'd stay at the diner... 750 00:36:25,667 --> 00:36:28,422 and then I drove up here, and I parked, and I waited. 751 00:36:28,630 --> 00:36:32,673 And then this car pulled up, and she got out with him. 752 00:36:34,183 --> 00:36:36,495 And they went inside... 753 00:36:37,064 --> 00:36:38,624 and I watched them go. 754 00:36:38,775 --> 00:36:40,814 And you're sure he's the owner of the socks? 755 00:36:40,987 --> 00:36:44,062 Well, I didn't ask him, but he's the owner of the socks. 756 00:36:44,702 --> 00:36:47,584 And if he isn't, the picture's still not looking very good. 757 00:36:47,792 --> 00:36:49,227 I agree with you there. 758 00:36:49,378 --> 00:36:51,769 Anyway, I sat here and watched them go inside. 759 00:36:51,965 --> 00:36:55,086 Then all these thoughts were rolling around in my head. 760 00:36:57,267 --> 00:37:01,059 I mean, how could she do this, you know? In there. In our house. 761 00:37:03,195 --> 00:37:04,709 I put bookshelves up in there. 762 00:37:04,864 --> 00:37:07,827 If it makes you feel any better, I don't think he's using your bookshelves. 763 00:37:08,037 --> 00:37:10,998 I suddenly just got so mad, you know, I lost it. 764 00:37:12,254 --> 00:37:13,609 I had to do something... 765 00:37:13,756 --> 00:37:17,229 so I got out and marched up to his car, and I kicked it. 766 00:37:17,471 --> 00:37:18,507 You kicked his car? 767 00:37:18,640 --> 00:37:21,442 I kicked it hard and over and over and over again. 768 00:37:21,730 --> 00:37:23,005 You beat up his car. 769 00:37:23,149 --> 00:37:24,983 Then all of a sudden, these cops pull up... 770 00:37:25,153 --> 00:37:27,112 because some busybody in the neighborhood... 771 00:37:27,282 --> 00:37:29,560 saw some lunatic attacking a car and... 772 00:37:30,538 --> 00:37:33,453 - Well, you know the rest. - Did Nicole see you? 773 00:37:34,587 --> 00:37:37,342 I don't know what she and the sock man saw. 774 00:37:38,553 --> 00:37:41,627 God, I feel like such an idiot. 775 00:37:42,477 --> 00:37:45,677 I mean, suddenly I became like one of those guys... 776 00:37:45,900 --> 00:37:49,259 that gets jealous and, you know, does crazy things. 777 00:37:49,490 --> 00:37:51,324 You weren't like one of those guys. 778 00:37:51,494 --> 00:37:54,090 - You were one of those guys. - [Snickering] Yeah, well. 779 00:37:54,749 --> 00:37:57,027 - Was there any damage? - No. 780 00:37:59,634 --> 00:38:00,784 Luke? 781 00:38:05,520 --> 00:38:07,114 Luke, where are you going? 782 00:38:07,481 --> 00:38:09,235 See? Nothing. Not a scratch. 783 00:38:09,401 --> 00:38:12,715 - Those stupid dent-resistant panels. - This is the car? 784 00:38:12,950 --> 00:38:14,704 Yes, this is the car. 785 00:38:14,870 --> 00:38:18,184 He sat there. She sat there. They got out there, walked up there... 786 00:38:18,418 --> 00:38:20,251 I jumped out there, ran up here... 787 00:38:20,422 --> 00:38:22,380 was handcuffed there, was driven off there... 788 00:38:22,551 --> 00:38:23,587 I went to jail... 789 00:38:23,719 --> 00:38:25,758 and you drove all the way up here to get me... 790 00:38:25,932 --> 00:38:27,652 - and they are still in there! - Luke. 791 00:38:27,811 --> 00:38:30,453 I can't believe they're still in there. What are they doing? 792 00:38:30,649 --> 00:38:31,845 Luke, come on. 793 00:38:32,236 --> 00:38:35,755 I know what they're doing. But even if you took one of those pills... 794 00:38:35,993 --> 00:38:38,145 that they were hawking at the Super Bowl, you know... 795 00:38:38,330 --> 00:38:40,528 they should have been done in four or five hours tops. 796 00:38:40,710 --> 00:38:41,831 That commercial said it all: 797 00:38:41,920 --> 00:38:44,881 If you're still active after four hours, you should call the damn doctor. 798 00:38:45,093 --> 00:38:47,211 - Come on, why don't we... - What are they, talking? 799 00:38:47,389 --> 00:38:49,267 Making plans in my house? 800 00:38:49,852 --> 00:38:51,605 Damn son of a... 801 00:38:53,358 --> 00:38:56,193 You lying piece of sockless garbage! 802 00:38:56,406 --> 00:38:58,478 Why don't you take home my socks, too? 803 00:38:58,659 --> 00:39:01,495 Luke, you were busted already once tonight. That's it. 804 00:39:01,707 --> 00:39:02,903 All right, I'm fine. 805 00:39:03,043 --> 00:39:04,797 - Are you sure? - Yeah. 806 00:39:04,963 --> 00:39:06,902 Pretty soon, that car's gonna start fighting back. 807 00:39:06,926 --> 00:39:09,077 I'm fine. Really. I'm fine. 808 00:39:11,350 --> 00:39:13,263 You know, Luke, I know I've never really been... 809 00:39:13,437 --> 00:39:15,908 Miss This-Is-Great about your relationship... 810 00:39:16,109 --> 00:39:19,069 but I am so, so sorry. 811 00:39:20,116 --> 00:39:21,916 You don't deserve this. 812 00:39:22,079 --> 00:39:24,550 - You really don't deserve this. - Yeah. 813 00:39:28,006 --> 00:39:30,238 - I guess that's it. - Yeah. 814 00:39:32,264 --> 00:39:34,941 Well, at least I finally got to see your house. 815 00:39:37,774 --> 00:39:40,336 Fresh air is good. Fresh air is healthy. 816 00:39:40,697 --> 00:39:42,371 I'm feeling better. 817 00:39:42,951 --> 00:39:44,625 - Gotta sit. - Me, too. 818 00:39:45,539 --> 00:39:48,101 - What was in the punch? Did we ask? - No. 819 00:39:48,502 --> 00:39:51,258 - Should we have asked? - That's not what the cool kids do. 820 00:39:51,466 --> 00:39:54,267 I'm loving the spinning beach. How about you? 821 00:39:55,223 --> 00:39:56,259 Yeah. 822 00:39:58,062 --> 00:39:59,781 - So are we done? - With what? 823 00:39:59,940 --> 00:40:03,095 - Spring break. Are we done? - I don't know. 824 00:40:04,741 --> 00:40:06,495 Let's go down the list. 825 00:40:06,745 --> 00:40:08,704 - Okay, we came. - Check. 826 00:40:08,874 --> 00:40:10,833 - We danced. - Check. 827 00:40:11,587 --> 00:40:12,737 - We drank. - Check. 828 00:40:12,881 --> 00:40:15,159 We threw up. 829 00:40:15,762 --> 00:40:18,278 - We didn't throw up. - Give us 10 more minutes. 830 00:40:18,767 --> 00:40:21,159 - Right. - Basically, we're done. 831 00:40:22,566 --> 00:40:25,287 I feel like we have officially participated. 832 00:40:25,488 --> 00:40:27,401 We've experienced the entire social ritual. 833 00:40:27,575 --> 00:40:30,969 I have absolutely no desire to ever feel this way again. 834 00:40:32,251 --> 00:40:34,529 - Let's go home. - How? 835 00:40:34,713 --> 00:40:36,555 We're supposed to stay the rest of the weekend. 836 00:40:36,676 --> 00:40:38,715 Frequent flyer miles, baby. 837 00:40:39,138 --> 00:40:41,131 Cool peanuts. I'm in. 838 00:40:41,309 --> 00:40:43,746 Great. I'll call as soon as I can get up. 839 00:40:44,314 --> 00:40:46,307 - What's that? - What? 840 00:40:50,702 --> 00:40:51,818 Oh, my God! 841 00:40:52,622 --> 00:40:55,457 Glenn! What happened to you? 842 00:40:55,836 --> 00:40:58,399 The last time we saw you, you went to get a hot dog. 843 00:40:58,592 --> 00:40:59,788 Hot dog? 844 00:41:01,054 --> 00:41:02,250 Hot dog. 845 00:41:04,436 --> 00:41:05,996 [Shouting] 846 00:41:11,907 --> 00:41:14,743 You gotta admit, it's been a pretty good trip. 847 00:41:16,166 --> 00:41:18,557 So I call this place where you were supposedly staying... 848 00:41:18,754 --> 00:41:21,156 - and some punk at the desk tells me... - I said I was sorry. 849 00:41:21,342 --> 00:41:23,381 "I'm sorry, ma'am, she's not here anymore." 850 00:41:23,554 --> 00:41:25,547 My heart flew out of my chest... 851 00:41:25,725 --> 00:41:27,927 and not just because he called me "ma'am," which I hate. 852 00:41:28,271 --> 00:41:29,786 I didn't mean to freak you out. 853 00:41:29,942 --> 00:41:32,140 You don't take off without telling Mommy. 854 00:41:32,321 --> 00:41:34,758 I love that I didn't have to ask you to go on spring break... 855 00:41:34,951 --> 00:41:36,220 but I had to ask you to come home. 856 00:41:36,244 --> 00:41:38,921 I had visions of you being swallowed by a whale... 857 00:41:39,125 --> 00:41:41,607 or taking off with some surfers to go chase the perfect wave... 858 00:41:41,755 --> 00:41:42,791 and not inviting me. 859 00:41:42,924 --> 00:41:45,965 - It just got to be way too much fun. - Yeah? How much is too much? 860 00:41:46,180 --> 00:41:47,854 - I had a drink. - And? 861 00:41:48,016 --> 00:41:49,531 Paris and I took turns throwing up. 862 00:41:49,687 --> 00:41:51,889 That's the way you girls will find yourselves a husband. 863 00:41:52,024 --> 00:41:55,383 It was fine. Aspirin, tons of water, mac and cheese... 864 00:41:56,324 --> 00:41:58,886 My baby's discovered her first hangover food. 865 00:41:59,079 --> 00:42:01,675 I wish I had a picture to put next to your clay handprints. 866 00:42:02,084 --> 00:42:03,440 I think I still have the box. 867 00:42:03,587 --> 00:42:04,942 Send it to me. So how was it? 868 00:42:05,090 --> 00:42:07,926 It was interesting, you know? We sat on the beach, went to a club... 869 00:42:08,138 --> 00:42:10,139 we watched The Power of Myth, Paris and I kissed... 870 00:42:10,224 --> 00:42:12,787 Whoa! You watched The Power of Myth? 871 00:42:13,105 --> 00:42:15,223 - Hold on a sec. - I hid that from you. 872 00:42:16,737 --> 00:42:19,128 - Hello? - Hey, Rory, it's me. 873 00:42:19,659 --> 00:42:22,892 Hi. Dean, hold on a sec. 874 00:42:24,167 --> 00:42:25,328 Mom, I have to call you back. 875 00:42:25,378 --> 00:42:27,290 You did not spend spring break with Bill Moyers. 876 00:42:27,674 --> 00:42:28,709 Bye. 877 00:42:29,177 --> 00:42:32,092 - Hi. - So, I got your message. 878 00:42:32,433 --> 00:42:33,629 - Oh, yeah? - Yeah. 879 00:42:33,769 --> 00:42:36,524 It sounds like you were having a pretty good time out there. 880 00:42:36,732 --> 00:42:38,934 I've got a lot of questions. I even wrote a couple down. 881 00:42:39,111 --> 00:42:40,307 Are you ready?