1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:02,375 - Thanks. Is it cold out there! - I know, I'm freezing. 2 00:00:02,568 --> 00:00:04,284 Come on in. Sit by the fire. 3 00:00:04,442 --> 00:00:06,670 I'll make you both a drink and then we can talk. 4 00:00:06,858 --> 00:00:08,052 - About what? - Antennas up. 5 00:00:08,192 --> 00:00:09,703 Aye, aye, Captain. 6 00:00:10,024 --> 00:00:11,899 So, Lorelai, how are you? 7 00:00:12,732 --> 00:00:13,879 I'm fine, Mom. 8 00:00:14,023 --> 00:00:16,216 - Rory? - I'm fine, too, Grandma. 9 00:00:16,397 --> 00:00:18,908 - How are you, Mom? - Also fine. 10 00:00:19,105 --> 00:00:21,934 Look at that, all three of us fine, just like the Judds. 11 00:00:22,146 --> 00:00:24,453 So, Lorelai, are you dating? 12 00:00:26,770 --> 00:00:28,405 No, I'm not dating. 13 00:00:28,560 --> 00:00:31,310 - Really? There's no one at all? - No, I'm totally single. 14 00:00:31,517 --> 00:00:34,585 - Any chance you'll get back with Max? - No, Mom, there's no chance. 15 00:00:34,808 --> 00:00:37,115 What about the man at the diner who refuses to shave? 16 00:00:37,308 --> 00:00:38,321 Luke is just a friend. 17 00:00:38,333 --> 00:00:40,296 You think you'll be single your entire life? 18 00:00:40,515 --> 00:00:41,548 Excuse me? 19 00:00:41,681 --> 00:00:44,829 In terms of your finding someone, what do you think the odds are? 20 00:00:45,056 --> 00:00:46,613 Okay, what is going on? 21 00:00:47,180 --> 00:00:49,691 I visited the family mausoleum today. 22 00:00:49,888 --> 00:00:51,524 Never what you think it's gonna be. 23 00:00:51,678 --> 00:00:54,792 I just wanted to check on things, make sure they were keeping it up... 24 00:00:55,011 --> 00:00:56,045 changing the flowers. 25 00:00:56,177 --> 00:00:59,166 So I went inside and looked around, and it occurred to me... 26 00:00:59,384 --> 00:01:01,498 that there's a very limited space there. 27 00:01:01,675 --> 00:01:05,629 Now, of course, there's a slot open for me, Richard, you, and Rory. 28 00:01:05,883 --> 00:01:09,394 But after the two of you, that's it. No more room for anyone else. 29 00:01:09,798 --> 00:01:10,831 Yes. 30 00:01:10,964 --> 00:01:14,237 So if you actually do meet someone someday... 31 00:01:14,464 --> 00:01:15,861 I don't know where to put him. 32 00:01:16,005 --> 00:01:18,754 Maybe we could just dump him at the local pool hall. 33 00:01:18,962 --> 00:01:19,695 Don't be silly. 34 00:01:19,707 --> 00:01:21,677 'Cause this is not a conversation for that. 35 00:01:21,878 --> 00:01:23,867 We can't expand into the crypt next door... 36 00:01:24,044 --> 00:01:26,476 because the family that owns it won't even discuss it. 37 00:01:26,668 --> 00:01:27,986 I'm getting a little creeped out. 38 00:01:28,126 --> 00:01:32,160 So I talked to the head of the cemetery, and he suggested that we buy an annex. 39 00:01:32,417 --> 00:01:33,530 - An annex? - Yes. 40 00:01:33,666 --> 00:01:37,177 Like an outlet store. It would specialize in the irregular family members. 41 00:01:37,415 --> 00:01:41,085 If we do get the annex, and you do eventually, someday, get married... 42 00:01:41,331 --> 00:01:42,888 Just say "fat chance," will you? 43 00:01:43,039 --> 00:01:45,550 I just meant we'll have to decide who to move. 44 00:01:45,746 --> 00:01:47,417 Oh, oh. Well... 45 00:01:48,370 --> 00:01:51,404 Why don't we move Aunt Cecile? She was always annoying at parties. 46 00:01:51,620 --> 00:01:53,449 - She loved the "knock, knock" jokes. - Mom! 47 00:01:53,619 --> 00:01:55,732 - What? - You can't just kick out Aunt Cecile. 48 00:01:55,910 --> 00:01:59,455 "Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Pineapple." "Pineapple who?" 49 00:01:59,783 --> 00:02:02,658 That's where it ended. Never fully grasped its concept. 50 00:02:02,866 --> 00:02:06,093 She was a complete idiot. Okay, it's decided. Cecile goes. 51 00:02:06,324 --> 00:02:08,073 Look, put me in the annex. 52 00:02:09,031 --> 00:02:11,417 You are not leaving me alone in there with Cecile. 53 00:02:11,614 --> 00:02:12,812 I won't be held responsible... 54 00:02:12,863 --> 00:02:15,613 for somebody being kicked out of their eternal resting place. 55 00:02:15,820 --> 00:02:17,456 I have an idea. I'll probably go first. 56 00:02:17,612 --> 00:02:20,999 - Throw Rory in with me later. - I'd like my own space, if you don't mind. 57 00:02:21,235 --> 00:02:23,542 Why? It'd totally be fun to be there together. 58 00:02:23,735 --> 00:02:26,644 I plan to be buried with all the good CDs and my "rock star" belt. 59 00:02:26,859 --> 00:02:28,495 Sorry I'm late. What did I miss? 60 00:02:28,650 --> 00:02:31,320 We were just discussing who to move to the annex. 61 00:02:32,065 --> 00:02:36,054 I vote for Cecile. Horrible woman. And those terrible jokes. 62 00:02:36,440 --> 00:02:39,189 - What did I tell you? - This is a cold, cold family. 63 00:03:35,881 --> 00:03:38,437 - This is really good. - Yeah. What is it? 64 00:03:39,546 --> 00:03:41,296 - No, don't tell us. - Why not? 65 00:03:41,503 --> 00:03:44,491 Every time I've had something great, but didn't know what it was... 66 00:03:44,711 --> 00:03:46,786 it turned out to be something disgusting that 67 00:03:46,798 --> 00:03:48,700 I wouldn't have tried in the first place. 68 00:03:48,960 --> 00:03:50,630 - Example? - Snails. 69 00:03:50,792 --> 00:03:52,781 - Gross. - Eat in ignorance and enjoy. 70 00:03:52,958 --> 00:03:53,957 Gladly. 71 00:03:54,208 --> 00:03:57,515 - So, Dad, how's retired life treating you? - Fascinating, actually. 72 00:03:57,749 --> 00:03:59,863 I find myself noticing things. 73 00:04:00,040 --> 00:04:03,108 Everyday things that I must have witnessed a hundred times before... 74 00:04:03,330 --> 00:04:04,807 and just walked right past. 75 00:04:04,955 --> 00:04:08,386 Like yesterday, your mother moved a vase, the one in the hall. 76 00:04:08,662 --> 00:04:10,173 And she didn't do it in front of me. 77 00:04:10,329 --> 00:04:12,795 No, 'cause nice girls never move vases in front of men. 78 00:04:12,994 --> 00:04:14,665 And she only moved it a little... 79 00:04:14,827 --> 00:04:17,781 but as I passed it by, I noticed it had been moved. 80 00:04:18,035 --> 00:04:20,103 - Impressive. - Every day's a new discovery. 81 00:04:20,284 --> 00:04:21,761 Your mother changed her hair... 82 00:04:21,908 --> 00:04:24,862 or she wore shoes that didn't match her purse. 83 00:04:25,657 --> 00:04:27,532 - Last Thursday. - For heaven's sake. 84 00:04:27,698 --> 00:04:29,216 - You know what else I noticed? - What? 85 00:04:29,364 --> 00:04:30,841 A first-edition Flaubert... 86 00:04:30,989 --> 00:04:34,296 mint condition, shoved behind several of my Churchill biographies. 87 00:04:34,530 --> 00:04:35,757 - No. - Interested? 88 00:04:35,904 --> 00:04:37,972 - My life is good. - Follow me. 89 00:04:38,154 --> 00:04:41,461 See if you can find the new Chanel patent leather pirate boots... 90 00:04:41,694 --> 00:04:43,808 stuffed back behind your Churchills. 91 00:04:45,609 --> 00:04:47,120 What's up, Mom? 92 00:04:47,276 --> 00:04:49,423 - Nothing's up. - You were twitching. I saw you. 93 00:04:49,609 --> 00:04:50,678 You did not. 94 00:04:50,816 --> 00:04:53,453 When Dad talked about the vase, you pulled a full-on Tabitha. 95 00:04:53,649 --> 00:04:55,365 - I did not. - Is something wrong? 96 00:04:55,523 --> 00:04:57,194 No, nothing's wrong. 97 00:04:57,523 --> 00:04:59,318 Okay. Nothing's wrong. 98 00:04:59,814 --> 00:05:03,121 It's just that things are a little strange lately. 99 00:05:03,354 --> 00:05:05,263 - What is? - Having him home. 100 00:05:05,438 --> 00:05:07,551 We've never really been home at the same time. 101 00:05:07,729 --> 00:05:10,604 We got married, went to Europe, we came back, he went to work... 102 00:05:10,811 --> 00:05:13,526 - and it's been that way ever since. - So now it's different. 103 00:05:13,727 --> 00:05:16,079 It's very different. He's always here... 104 00:05:16,268 --> 00:05:19,415 watching me and noticing when I move a vase, and... 105 00:05:20,100 --> 00:05:22,565 I don't know. It's silly. 106 00:05:23,182 --> 00:05:26,647 So he noticed my hair was different. Women die for that sort of thing. 107 00:05:26,889 --> 00:05:28,400 Mom, it's just an adjustment. 108 00:05:28,556 --> 00:05:31,510 You guys just need to figure out a new routine. 109 00:05:31,722 --> 00:05:34,232 - I guess so. - It'll just take some time. 110 00:05:34,429 --> 00:05:35,781 Then you'll find your rhythm... 111 00:05:35,928 --> 00:05:38,235 he'll go back to ignoring your hair. All will be well. 112 00:05:38,428 --> 00:05:40,655 - Yes, you're probably right. - I am right. 113 00:05:40,844 --> 00:05:42,912 Okay, I give. What is this? 114 00:05:43,093 --> 00:05:44,206 Sweetbreads. 115 00:05:44,551 --> 00:05:47,221 - Sweetbreads. So that's... - Pancreas. 116 00:05:50,382 --> 00:05:51,735 No! 117 00:05:52,048 --> 00:05:55,832 No, no, no. 118 00:05:56,089 --> 00:05:57,486 - Paris. - I'm not done. 119 00:05:57,630 --> 00:05:58,857 - Sorry. - No. 120 00:05:59,005 --> 00:06:01,834 - Glad she finished that one. - Why am I the only one who cares? 121 00:06:02,045 --> 00:06:03,761 You're not the only one who cares. 122 00:06:03,920 --> 00:06:06,272 I know you do, but everyone in this room should care... 123 00:06:06,461 --> 00:06:08,734 because I can't be the only one to care, besides you. 124 00:06:08,918 --> 00:06:11,066 It's just a contest. It's not like you get a car... 125 00:06:11,251 --> 00:06:14,205 - or a lifetime supply of Rice-A-Roni. - God, I love that stuff. 126 00:06:14,417 --> 00:06:17,849 The Oppenheimer Award for Excellence in school journalism is not a contest. 127 00:06:18,082 --> 00:06:20,071 It's a statement. It says you're the best. 128 00:06:20,249 --> 00:06:22,556 The best writers, best reporters, best editors. 129 00:06:22,747 --> 00:06:25,781 It says you've crushed all others who have dared to take you on. 130 00:06:25,997 --> 00:06:28,951 It says that every other school in the United States of America... 131 00:06:29,163 --> 00:06:31,356 is feeling nothing but shame, defeat and pain... 132 00:06:31,537 --> 00:06:34,174 because of the people who won the Oppenheimer plaque. 133 00:06:34,369 --> 00:06:37,165 I want to be those people. I want to cause that pain. 134 00:06:37,368 --> 00:06:38,886 - Our paper is good. - Not good enough. 135 00:06:39,034 --> 00:06:41,231 - Last week's issue... - Was a fine effort by some kids. 136 00:06:41,409 --> 00:06:44,205 - We are a bunch of kids. - Not when we're in this room. 137 00:06:44,408 --> 00:06:48,397 Lessure Prep Gazette, Broadmouth Banner, Richmond Heights Chronicle... 138 00:06:48,657 --> 00:06:51,009 these publications are not our competition. 139 00:06:51,614 --> 00:06:55,125 The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, The Washington Post... 140 00:06:55,363 --> 00:06:57,715 these publications are our competition. 141 00:06:58,946 --> 00:07:01,253 - Paris has gone bye-bye. - We need to raise the bar. 142 00:07:01,445 --> 00:07:03,434 We need to be better, think harder, dig deeper. 143 00:07:03,610 --> 00:07:07,076 I don't want to just submit a good issue, but a great issue, the best issue. 144 00:07:07,318 --> 00:07:08,909 - When's the deadline? - Next week. 145 00:07:09,067 --> 00:07:11,374 Okay, so then we'd better get brainstorming. 146 00:07:11,567 --> 00:07:13,476 - Does anyone have an idea for a theme? - Yes. 147 00:07:13,649 --> 00:07:15,206 - What? - The one that wins. 148 00:07:15,357 --> 00:07:16,914 Okay, good. Big help. 149 00:07:17,315 --> 00:07:19,781 All right, everyone, we should get working. 150 00:07:21,148 --> 00:07:24,579 You're going to give yourself a stroke one of these days, you know that? 151 00:07:24,813 --> 00:07:28,086 Graciella, I'm leaving the shopping list on the table here. 152 00:07:28,311 --> 00:07:30,300 Remember, we need the low-sudsing detergent. 153 00:07:30,478 --> 00:07:32,591 I've drawn a picture of what the box looks like... 154 00:07:32,769 --> 00:07:35,279 so for heaven's sake, pay attention this time. 155 00:07:37,268 --> 00:07:38,415 How was your walk? 156 00:07:38,559 --> 00:07:40,275 Carl Anderson needs a new roof. 157 00:07:40,434 --> 00:07:42,581 - I'm gonna drop him a note. - Good idea. 158 00:07:42,766 --> 00:07:44,277 - Busy day? - Very. 159 00:07:44,433 --> 00:07:46,785 Is that the same cup of coffee you had when I left? 160 00:07:46,973 --> 00:07:49,530 When I left an hour ago, you were having coffee. 161 00:07:49,723 --> 00:07:51,200 No, this is a different cup. 162 00:07:51,347 --> 00:07:53,335 So that's your third cup of coffee this morning. 163 00:07:53,513 --> 00:07:55,308 - I guess. - Interesting. 164 00:07:55,595 --> 00:07:58,266 I just realized you have three cups of coffee in the morning. 165 00:07:58,469 --> 00:07:59,946 Not every morning. 166 00:08:00,094 --> 00:08:01,890 - Every morning this week. - So what? 167 00:08:02,052 --> 00:08:04,722 Nothing. Just an observation, that's all. 168 00:08:05,051 --> 00:08:07,926 Lot of coffee to drink, early in the morning. 169 00:08:08,758 --> 00:08:10,985 Any thoughts on what you'd like for dinner tonight? 170 00:08:11,174 --> 00:08:12,606 - No, anything's fine. - All right. 171 00:08:12,757 --> 00:08:14,950 - What are you writing down? - Lamb chops. 172 00:08:15,132 --> 00:08:17,086 - Is that for tonight? - Yes. 173 00:08:17,631 --> 00:08:21,335 - Do you not want Iamb chops tonight? - No, Iamb chops is fine for tonight. 174 00:08:21,587 --> 00:08:24,337 I just thought a nice roast would also be nice for a change. 175 00:08:24,546 --> 00:08:26,693 - Roast it is. - Of course, if you want Iamb chops... 176 00:08:26,878 --> 00:08:29,151 - We're having roast. - Okay, if that is what you want. 177 00:08:29,335 --> 00:08:31,846 Do you want me to drop off anything at the dry cleaner's? 178 00:08:32,043 --> 00:08:33,190 - You're going there? - Yes. 179 00:08:33,334 --> 00:08:34,448 I'll go with you. 180 00:08:34,584 --> 00:08:37,618 - I can bring in whatever you have. - But it'd be nice to go together. 181 00:08:37,833 --> 00:08:40,709 It would be romantic, but I won't have time to get back here... 182 00:08:40,915 --> 00:08:43,665 before my DAR meeting. Probably better if I went alone. 183 00:08:43,873 --> 00:08:45,543 You can come with me next week. 184 00:08:45,706 --> 00:08:47,661 But I can go to the meeting with you. 185 00:08:47,830 --> 00:08:50,819 To my meeting of the Daughters of the American Revolution? 186 00:08:51,037 --> 00:08:52,867 I think it'd be fascinating. 187 00:08:53,037 --> 00:08:55,105 I go straight from there to the symphony luncheon. 188 00:08:55,286 --> 00:08:56,638 I'll tag along there, too. 189 00:08:56,786 --> 00:08:58,536 But from there, I get my hair done. 190 00:08:58,702 --> 00:09:01,009 You don't want to sit around while I have my hair done. 191 00:09:01,201 --> 00:09:02,758 - No, I don't. - There you go. 192 00:09:02,909 --> 00:09:04,341 You can cancel that. 193 00:09:04,492 --> 00:09:06,924 I get my hair done every Wednesday at 3:00. 194 00:09:07,116 --> 00:09:08,594 Your hair looks fine. 195 00:09:08,740 --> 00:09:11,013 Because I have my hair done every Wednesday at 3:00. 196 00:09:11,198 --> 00:09:12,232 What am I going to do? 197 00:09:12,365 --> 00:09:14,638 - Why don't you go to the club? - What? 198 00:09:14,822 --> 00:09:16,016 Yes, the club. 199 00:09:16,155 --> 00:09:19,428 You spend a fortune to belong there, and you never got to go much before. 200 00:09:19,654 --> 00:09:22,040 - Why don't you go there now? - On a Wednesday afternoon? 201 00:09:22,237 --> 00:09:23,555 I think it would be perfect. 202 00:09:23,695 --> 00:09:25,842 I don't even know what they do on a Wednesday. 203 00:09:26,027 --> 00:09:27,584 No time like the present to find out. 204 00:09:27,735 --> 00:09:30,121 - All right, I'll go to the club. - Wonderful. 205 00:09:32,109 --> 00:09:34,825 Going to the club on a Wednesday afternoon. 206 00:09:35,316 --> 00:09:38,747 Life certainly is an interesting game of cards, isn't it? 207 00:09:38,982 --> 00:09:40,334 It certainly is. 208 00:09:40,898 --> 00:09:43,932 I'll see you tonight. 209 00:09:44,146 --> 00:09:45,658 Have a good time. 210 00:09:47,980 --> 00:09:50,287 Graciella, I need more coffee now. 211 00:09:50,728 --> 00:09:51,921 How about a triple feature? 212 00:09:52,061 --> 00:09:54,368 Three Days of the Condor, The Show, and The Jerk. 213 00:09:54,561 --> 00:09:57,276 - The Show is 9.5 hours. - The Jerk is short. 214 00:09:57,476 --> 00:09:59,669 The three faces of Costner: Bull Durham... 215 00:09:59,850 --> 00:10:01,407 Dances with Wolves, The Postman. 216 00:10:01,559 --> 00:10:04,025 Tom Petty playing Tom Petty, that big speech about: 217 00:10:04,224 --> 00:10:06,418 "Once upon a time, there was a thing called mail." 218 00:10:06,598 --> 00:10:08,792 It'll make you laugh, cry, or mail something. 219 00:10:08,973 --> 00:10:11,803 Or we could do a Ruth Gordon film festival. 220 00:10:12,013 --> 00:10:15,002 Harold and Maude, Rosemary's Baby, and that great episode of Taxi. 221 00:10:15,221 --> 00:10:17,334 Got it. The worst film festival ever: 222 00:10:17,512 --> 00:10:19,626 Cool as lce, Hudson Hawk, and Electric Boogaloo. 223 00:10:19,803 --> 00:10:20,951 - Sold. - I'll get the Hawk. 224 00:10:21,095 --> 00:10:22,572 I'll get the Boogaloo. 225 00:10:22,719 --> 00:10:24,151 [Boys giggling] 226 00:10:24,301 --> 00:10:27,256 - See? I told you. - Wow! 227 00:10:27,467 --> 00:10:29,978 - Guys, can I get in there? - Yeah. 228 00:10:35,965 --> 00:10:38,875 - Got it, plus four boxes of red vines. - Let's go. 229 00:10:39,339 --> 00:10:41,248 - Hi, Kirk. - Evening, Lorelai. 230 00:10:42,046 --> 00:10:44,557 I forgot my card at home, but I think my number's 6247. 231 00:10:44,754 --> 00:10:46,629 - You forgot your card? - I might have lost it. 232 00:10:46,795 --> 00:10:49,705 - Lost it? Was it temporary or laminated? - Laminated. 233 00:10:49,919 --> 00:10:52,987 - You lost a permanent card. - You can just get me a new card. 234 00:10:53,210 --> 00:10:55,517 I hope you understand the gravity of the situation. 235 00:10:55,709 --> 00:10:56,777 I'm trying to grasp it. 236 00:10:56,917 --> 00:10:57,996 These cards are agreements. 237 00:10:58,125 --> 00:11:00,398 It's an agreement between you and the video Store... 238 00:11:00,582 --> 00:11:03,617 stating that you will take care of your card, honor your card... 239 00:11:03,832 --> 00:11:05,423 - you'll be nice to your card... - Kirk. 240 00:11:05,581 --> 00:11:06,978 - I'll be right back. - Thanks. 241 00:11:07,123 --> 00:11:10,907 Hello? Reception sucks here. I'll be right back. 242 00:11:11,330 --> 00:11:12,682 [Boys giggling] 243 00:11:12,830 --> 00:11:13,977 It'll be ready in a minute. 244 00:11:14,121 --> 00:11:16,314 There were a couple of little kids over there... 245 00:11:16,495 --> 00:11:18,927 and they were looking at this tape that's kind of mature. 246 00:11:19,119 --> 00:11:21,233 You might want to put that stuff on a higher shelf. 247 00:11:21,409 --> 00:11:22,408 How mature? 248 00:11:22,535 --> 00:11:25,251 It's a half-naked woman just standing there. 249 00:11:25,700 --> 00:11:27,132 - Is she a blonde? - What? 250 00:11:27,283 --> 00:11:28,794 I'll check it out right now. 251 00:11:28,950 --> 00:11:30,699 Mom, I can hear you now. What's up? 252 00:11:30,865 --> 00:11:32,581 - You have to take your father. - What? 253 00:11:32,740 --> 00:11:35,047 Tomorrow, for the whole day. Just take him. 254 00:11:35,240 --> 00:11:36,717 - Take him where? - I don't care. 255 00:11:36,863 --> 00:11:39,420 The zoo, the mall, Rhode Island. Get him out of my house. 256 00:11:39,613 --> 00:11:42,647 - What happened? - He's joining my water aerobics class. 257 00:11:42,862 --> 00:11:44,930 - What? - He bought some new swim trunks. 258 00:11:45,112 --> 00:11:46,145 He's out of control. 259 00:11:46,277 --> 00:11:48,743 - Okay, Mom, calm down. - I can't calm down. 260 00:11:48,944 --> 00:11:52,330 I can't turn around without him being there, following me, staring at me. 261 00:11:52,567 --> 00:11:54,363 - He likes you. - Don't be cute. 262 00:11:54,526 --> 00:11:56,003 The man is driving me insane. 263 00:11:56,149 --> 00:11:59,217 I am going to go insane. If you don't help me, I'll take you with me. 264 00:11:59,440 --> 00:12:01,236 Okay, I would like to help you... 265 00:12:01,399 --> 00:12:02,717 - You owe me. - What? 266 00:12:02,856 --> 00:12:04,367 I pay for Rory's school. 267 00:12:04,523 --> 00:12:06,750 - Are you serious? - And I cosigned your loan. 268 00:12:06,938 --> 00:12:09,495 - You have a house because of me. - Are you hearing yourself? 269 00:12:09,687 --> 00:12:12,801 I'm sorry, but I'm desperate. I just need one day of peace. 270 00:12:13,020 --> 00:12:15,008 And I will do anything to get it. Anything. 271 00:12:15,186 --> 00:12:18,140 Okay. Mom, fine. I'll take him. 272 00:12:18,352 --> 00:12:20,499 I can't tell you how much I appreciate this. 273 00:12:20,684 --> 00:12:22,081 Emily, where are you? 274 00:12:22,226 --> 00:12:25,612 - I have to go. Tomorrow morning. - Tomorrow morning. Bye. 275 00:12:30,473 --> 00:12:32,905 Oh, my God. The most horrible thing happened. 276 00:12:33,098 --> 00:12:35,734 Headmaster Charleston's office called. He's been kidnapped. 277 00:12:35,930 --> 00:12:38,203 Two guys broke in, threw him in a Hefty bag... 278 00:12:38,388 --> 00:12:40,104 used those twisty ties and carted him off. 279 00:12:40,261 --> 00:12:42,216 Classes have been canceled until further notice. 280 00:12:42,387 --> 00:12:43,614 I'm going to school. 281 00:12:43,761 --> 00:12:47,306 Rory, come on. It's just one day. I'll write you a note. 282 00:12:47,718 --> 00:12:49,865 "Dear Nazis, Rory had to miss school today..." 283 00:12:50,051 --> 00:12:53,119 "To save her mom from spending the entire day with her father..." 284 00:12:53,341 --> 00:12:55,137 "Who looks at her like she has three heads." 285 00:12:55,299 --> 00:12:56,367 Out of my way, please. 286 00:12:56,507 --> 00:13:00,541 Do you know the last time my father and I were alone for any period of time? 287 00:13:00,798 --> 00:13:02,672 I was kicked out of summer camp... 288 00:13:02,838 --> 00:13:04,906 for refusing to call the camp counselor "Peaches." 289 00:13:05,088 --> 00:13:08,838 I thought the entire concept of counselors choosing summer-fruit names was stupid. 290 00:13:09,087 --> 00:13:11,553 So they called my dad, and he came to get me... 291 00:13:11,753 --> 00:13:14,423 and it was just the two of us alone in the car, from Maine... 292 00:13:14,627 --> 00:13:16,854 with nothing to talk about but my camp failure. 293 00:13:17,043 --> 00:13:20,713 Luckily, I had also flashed the swim team, or even that would have gotten stale. 294 00:13:20,959 --> 00:13:22,754 I have The Franklin today. I cannot miss it. 295 00:13:22,916 --> 00:13:24,188 Rory, please. 296 00:13:24,374 --> 00:13:27,681 I can't handle the entire day with him. I can't. 297 00:13:29,039 --> 00:13:31,266 Mom, I promise. Just make it till the afternoon... 298 00:13:31,455 --> 00:13:33,887 and I promise I'll come home and take grandpa off your hands. 299 00:13:34,080 --> 00:13:35,113 All right. 300 00:13:35,245 --> 00:13:37,154 - It'll be fine. - It is not going to be fine. 301 00:13:37,328 --> 00:13:38,556 It's going to be horrible. 302 00:13:38,703 --> 00:13:40,850 It is going to be a bad, depressing Lifetime movie... 303 00:13:41,036 --> 00:13:42,910 and Nancy McKeon will be playing me. I am Jo. 304 00:13:43,077 --> 00:13:44,191 [Doorbell ringing] 305 00:13:44,326 --> 00:13:45,554 And that would be him. 306 00:13:45,701 --> 00:13:47,530 It's not going to be that bad. 307 00:13:48,450 --> 00:13:49,802 Hey. 308 00:13:50,325 --> 00:13:51,472 Be nice. 309 00:13:52,032 --> 00:13:53,101 Very good. 310 00:13:53,949 --> 00:13:55,301 - Hi, Dad. - Hey, Grandpa. 311 00:13:55,448 --> 00:13:56,880 Good morning, girls. 312 00:14:00,197 --> 00:14:01,629 Did you have any trouble coming? 313 00:14:01,780 --> 00:14:03,371 Not at all. The directions were fine. 314 00:14:03,528 --> 00:14:06,278 - I'll see you this afternoon. - I look forward to it. 315 00:14:07,402 --> 00:14:08,630 Have fun. 316 00:14:18,483 --> 00:14:20,313 - So, good drive? - Very good. 317 00:14:22,774 --> 00:14:23,772 Here. 318 00:14:30,480 --> 00:14:32,673 - Would you like some coffee? - I'm fine. 319 00:14:34,478 --> 00:14:37,308 - Do you want coffee? - Yes. God, yes. Thank you. 320 00:14:37,936 --> 00:14:40,083 Sure you don't... 321 00:14:40,393 --> 00:14:41,950 Coffee? No. 322 00:14:43,808 --> 00:14:44,922 Well... 323 00:14:45,266 --> 00:14:46,664 Can I offer you anything else? 324 00:14:46,807 --> 00:14:50,239 Some Pop-Tarts, or... That's pretty much it. 325 00:14:51,265 --> 00:14:53,935 You don't have to entertain me, Lorelai. 326 00:14:54,139 --> 00:14:57,048 I just came here to see you and your house and your town. 327 00:14:57,263 --> 00:14:59,331 You don't have to do anything special for me. 328 00:14:59,513 --> 00:15:01,501 - But you're my guest. - No, I'm your father. 329 00:15:01,678 --> 00:15:03,746 Just do whatever it is you normally would do. 330 00:15:03,928 --> 00:15:05,564 What I would normally do? 331 00:15:05,719 --> 00:15:07,787 Yes, like for instance, this morning... 332 00:15:07,968 --> 00:15:10,525 if I wasn't here, you would wake up... 333 00:15:11,134 --> 00:15:13,963 obviously get some coffee, and then what? 334 00:15:15,175 --> 00:15:17,368 I'd probably read the paper for a little while... 335 00:15:17,549 --> 00:15:18,707 and then have some breakfast. 336 00:15:18,799 --> 00:15:21,913 - Let's read the paper, then. - Okay. Let's read the paper. 337 00:15:27,421 --> 00:15:29,489 - What sections would you like? - You go first. 338 00:15:29,670 --> 00:15:31,466 - I'll take what's left. - Okay. 339 00:15:31,628 --> 00:15:35,856 Normally, I read the Arts & Leisure and the Lifestyles. 340 00:15:36,126 --> 00:15:37,240 Perfect. 341 00:15:37,376 --> 00:15:39,967 That leaves Business, Sports, and World News. 342 00:15:41,833 --> 00:15:44,628 - That worked out well. - Yes, it did, didn't it? 343 00:15:48,081 --> 00:15:50,592 Well, this is it. Luke's. 344 00:15:50,789 --> 00:15:55,142 You know, when I was in college, there was this horrible little diner... 345 00:15:55,454 --> 00:15:57,170 across from my apartment building. 346 00:15:57,329 --> 00:15:59,886 It was run by this terrible little couple. 347 00:16:00,078 --> 00:16:01,794 They were very angry. 348 00:16:01,952 --> 00:16:04,827 They would fight, break plates, curse. 349 00:16:05,618 --> 00:16:08,448 And I went in there every morning for three years... 350 00:16:08,658 --> 00:16:11,568 and I had the most dreadful breakfasts. Just awful. 351 00:16:11,783 --> 00:16:13,340 I really miss that place. 352 00:16:13,491 --> 00:16:16,286 - Morning. - Luke, you remember my father. 353 00:16:16,490 --> 00:16:18,240 - Nice to see you again. - Nice to see you. 354 00:16:18,406 --> 00:16:20,553 - Quite a place you've got here. - It pays the bills. 355 00:16:20,739 --> 00:16:22,296 Always a plus in business. 356 00:16:22,446 --> 00:16:24,832 - Dad, do you know what you want? - I already ate. 357 00:16:25,029 --> 00:16:26,257 You did? When? 358 00:16:26,403 --> 00:16:28,789 I had breakfast at home. I get up at 5:30 every morning. 359 00:16:28,986 --> 00:16:30,020 Wow. Why? 360 00:16:30,152 --> 00:16:32,709 I've gotten up at 5:30 for as long as I can remember. 361 00:16:32,902 --> 00:16:36,254 That was when you had to work. You can afford to get a little crazy. 362 00:16:36,484 --> 00:16:39,314 - Get up at 5:45. - Go ahead and order, Lorelai. 363 00:16:39,524 --> 00:16:42,479 I'll have the banana pancakes, side of bacon, and lots of coffee. 364 00:16:42,690 --> 00:16:44,009 Coming right up. 365 00:16:44,690 --> 00:16:47,565 - You didn't order any grapefruit. - I don't like grapefruit. 366 00:16:47,773 --> 00:16:50,080 I always start my breakfast with half a grapefruit. 367 00:16:50,271 --> 00:16:51,907 Do the Florida people know about you? 368 00:16:52,063 --> 00:16:54,972 Anita Bryant left this huge gap that has yet to be filled. 369 00:16:55,187 --> 00:16:57,653 It's important to start the day off correctly. 370 00:16:57,853 --> 00:16:59,444 A grapefruit is brain food. 371 00:16:59,602 --> 00:17:03,431 It has vitamin C and folio acid, and it helps with your digestion. 372 00:17:03,684 --> 00:17:05,112 It really is a terrific fruit. 373 00:17:05,124 --> 00:17:07,196 I feel like you're about to break into song. 374 00:17:07,433 --> 00:17:10,899 - I'm serious about this. - But I still don't like grapefruit. 375 00:17:11,140 --> 00:17:13,572 There are many things in life that we don't like... 376 00:17:13,765 --> 00:17:16,356 but their benefits far outweigh the temporary discomforts... 377 00:17:16,555 --> 00:17:18,987 - we have to endure. - Hold on a sec. 378 00:17:22,137 --> 00:17:24,012 - I need a grapefruit. - What? 379 00:17:24,179 --> 00:17:26,815 Before my pancakes this morning, I need half a grapefruit... 380 00:17:27,011 --> 00:17:28,840 preferably one that tastes like a doughnut. 381 00:17:29,010 --> 00:17:30,681 - I don't have grapefruit. - How come? 382 00:17:30,843 --> 00:17:33,195 - I've never had grapefruit. - I need a... 383 00:17:33,384 --> 00:17:36,020 Listen. I have my father with me all day. 384 00:17:36,216 --> 00:17:38,682 So far, there's been no major drama, yelling, ugliness... 385 00:17:38,882 --> 00:17:42,508 but there will be if I don't find a way to get half a grapefruit for breakfast. 386 00:17:42,756 --> 00:17:45,506 I could go next door to Doose's and buy a grapefruit. 387 00:17:45,714 --> 00:17:47,861 - I'd be eternally grateful. - I'll be right back. 388 00:17:48,047 --> 00:17:49,080 Thank you. 389 00:17:54,045 --> 00:17:57,670 - Okay, the grapefruit is coming. - You won't be sorry. 390 00:17:58,127 --> 00:18:00,195 So, listen, I was thinking... 391 00:18:00,584 --> 00:18:03,652 maybe after we're done here, you might like to walk around town... 392 00:18:03,875 --> 00:18:06,989 see the sights, and Rory usually gets home around 4:00. 393 00:18:07,207 --> 00:18:09,559 The two of you could hang out until I get off work... 394 00:18:09,748 --> 00:18:12,305 the three of us could meet for dinner. How does that sound? 395 00:18:12,497 --> 00:18:15,167 - Very sensible. - I had to make up for my shoes. 396 00:18:15,913 --> 00:18:18,504 - Is that your second cup of coffee? - Third. Why? 397 00:18:18,704 --> 00:18:19,738 No reason. 398 00:18:21,995 --> 00:18:24,710 It's a lot of coffee, first thing in the morning. 399 00:18:25,285 --> 00:18:26,558 [Humming] 400 00:18:28,784 --> 00:18:31,659 - You've got to stop doing that. - I've been doing some research... 401 00:18:31,867 --> 00:18:34,014 on the Oppenheimer Award and noticed something. 402 00:18:34,199 --> 00:18:37,585 The winning schools had an extremely strong human-interest story on page 1. 403 00:18:37,823 --> 00:18:40,494 That's what we need. We've got the teen issues down... 404 00:18:40,697 --> 00:18:43,413 a decent op-ed and political page, but human interest? 405 00:18:43,614 --> 00:18:45,284 - That's what we're missing. - Ideas? 406 00:18:45,446 --> 00:18:46,445 - Yes. - Do tell. 407 00:18:46,571 --> 00:18:49,003 According to the papers, there's been a huge increase... 408 00:18:49,195 --> 00:18:52,183 in the number of families fleeing the major cities for small towns. 409 00:18:52,402 --> 00:18:54,549 Hundreds of thousands of city-slicking yuppies... 410 00:18:54,735 --> 00:18:57,610 carting the trophy wife and asthmatic kids off to small towns... 411 00:18:57,817 --> 00:18:58,976 in search of the simple life. 412 00:18:59,067 --> 00:19:02,976 - Milk a cow, pet a pig, find yourself. - Interesting. 413 00:19:03,232 --> 00:19:06,141 And I thought about it. There's a romantic aspect to small towns. 414 00:19:06,356 --> 00:19:08,265 White picket fences, low crime rate... 415 00:19:08,439 --> 00:19:11,666 smaller classrooms, better tomatoes. It all seems perfect. 416 00:19:11,980 --> 00:19:14,014 But nothing is perfect. Nothing is safe. 417 00:19:14,188 --> 00:19:17,415 Nothing is ever what it seems. And then it hit me. Our story. 418 00:19:17,769 --> 00:19:21,121 We're going to blow the lid off the seedy underbelly of small-town life... 419 00:19:21,352 --> 00:19:23,545 - starting with yours. - Stars Hollow? 420 00:19:24,226 --> 00:19:27,533 You're going to uncover the seedy underbelly of Stars Hollow? 421 00:19:27,808 --> 00:19:29,922 Stars Hollow doesn't have a seedy underbelly. 422 00:19:30,099 --> 00:19:31,497 We don't even have a meter maid. 423 00:19:31,640 --> 00:19:33,867 You may be blind to it because you live there... 424 00:19:34,056 --> 00:19:36,522 but it's there and it's ugly, and I'm going to find it. 425 00:19:36,723 --> 00:19:38,916 - I'll meet you out front after school. - Not today. 426 00:19:39,097 --> 00:19:40,449 Why not? You hiding something? 427 00:19:40,597 --> 00:19:42,665 I promised to help my mom with something. 428 00:19:42,846 --> 00:19:44,993 Help her tomorrow. We have work to do. 429 00:19:45,387 --> 00:19:47,136 This could be our chance to nail this. 430 00:19:47,303 --> 00:19:50,496 I have a hunch there's a good story here, and I'm going to find it. 431 00:19:50,719 --> 00:19:52,753 I was even going to share a byline with you. 432 00:19:52,926 --> 00:19:54,642 But if you want to bail out, that's fine. 433 00:19:54,800 --> 00:19:56,233 Am I meeting you or not? 434 00:19:56,383 --> 00:19:58,418 I don't think you're gonna find anything. 435 00:19:58,591 --> 00:20:01,262 Then the worst that can happen is I spend time in your town... 436 00:20:01,466 --> 00:20:03,463 and have an urge to enter a pie in the county fair. 437 00:20:03,548 --> 00:20:05,503 I'll meet you out front. Don't be late. 438 00:20:08,755 --> 00:20:12,346 As soon as I can, I will send someone up. Yes, I will. 439 00:20:13,004 --> 00:20:15,231 I understand. 440 00:20:16,335 --> 00:20:18,972 I understand. 441 00:20:19,877 --> 00:20:21,785 I understand. Okay. 442 00:20:22,500 --> 00:20:24,569 I understand. Goodbye. 443 00:20:24,751 --> 00:20:26,944 - What do you understand? - I have no idea. 444 00:20:27,124 --> 00:20:29,079 I tuned them out at the first screech. 445 00:20:29,249 --> 00:20:31,998 - Have we heard from Manny yet? - No, and I have paged him twice. 446 00:20:32,206 --> 00:20:34,842 We only have enough linen for one seating. Hand me the phone. 447 00:20:35,038 --> 00:20:37,424 Plus, we are completely out of clean towels. 448 00:20:40,163 --> 00:20:42,878 Hi, Sophie, it's Lorelai. I need to talk to Manny. 449 00:20:43,078 --> 00:20:44,749 When will he be back? 450 00:20:44,994 --> 00:20:47,982 Okay, I need him to call me really soon. Like five minutes ago. 451 00:20:48,201 --> 00:20:50,348 Okay. Thanks. We need a backup plan. 452 00:20:50,534 --> 00:20:53,284 Call Patty's and see if she has any party-rental tablecloths... 453 00:20:53,491 --> 00:20:55,605 and then pull all the towels from the pool... 454 00:20:55,782 --> 00:20:58,089 and call Gandalfi's and order a case of champagne. 455 00:20:58,282 --> 00:21:00,316 Send a bottle to every room that's towelless. 456 00:21:00,489 --> 00:21:02,444 Page him every two minutes. No! 457 00:21:02,614 --> 00:21:04,602 Hi, Dad. What are you doing? 458 00:21:04,780 --> 00:21:07,848 - I thought you were gonna tour the town. - I did. 459 00:21:08,195 --> 00:21:11,071 I went into all the stores. The cat one, twice. 460 00:21:11,403 --> 00:21:13,960 And then I walked around a little, and then I was done. 461 00:21:14,153 --> 00:21:16,663 - What about the park? See the park? - Yes, I saw the park. 462 00:21:16,860 --> 00:21:19,814 What about the giant slinky? We're mighty proud of that. 463 00:21:20,151 --> 00:21:23,537 I saw the slinky, yes, and the 100-year-old oak tree... 464 00:21:23,983 --> 00:21:25,779 and the life-size yarn person. 465 00:21:25,940 --> 00:21:29,690 I even stopped by your house and had Babette introduce me to all her gnomes. 466 00:21:29,939 --> 00:21:32,893 And then I realized the only thing I had not seen... 467 00:21:33,105 --> 00:21:34,253 is my daughter at work. 468 00:21:34,396 --> 00:21:36,782 Watching me at work is not very interesting. Trust me. 469 00:21:36,979 --> 00:21:38,615 You underestimate yourself. 470 00:21:38,770 --> 00:21:41,326 Okay, there's books on the shelves over there. 471 00:21:41,519 --> 00:21:42,916 I have my newspaper. I'm fine. 472 00:21:43,060 --> 00:21:44,856 All right, I'm just gonna... 473 00:21:45,019 --> 00:21:47,087 - What's the matter? - Is your jacket in the back? 474 00:21:47,268 --> 00:21:49,858 - Your work jacket. - I don't have a work jacket. 475 00:21:50,058 --> 00:21:51,729 - That's your working outfit? - Yeah. 476 00:21:51,891 --> 00:21:52,969 And your boss doesn't mind? 477 00:21:53,057 --> 00:21:55,648 Considering my boss is me, no, she doesn't. 478 00:21:55,849 --> 00:21:58,963 She did at first, but then I bought her a cup of coffee, I realized... 479 00:21:59,180 --> 00:22:02,089 all the hostility she was expressing toward me was just jealousy. 480 00:22:02,305 --> 00:22:05,101 We've been best friends ever since. Take a seat, Dad. 481 00:22:05,304 --> 00:22:06,577 [Sighing] 482 00:22:06,720 --> 00:22:08,914 Will you get me an extra bottle of champagne... 483 00:22:09,094 --> 00:22:11,685 - and smack me over the head with it? - Absolutely. 484 00:22:11,885 --> 00:22:13,112 Independence Inn. 485 00:22:13,343 --> 00:22:15,411 Sit down, breathe, remember you're at work... 486 00:22:15,593 --> 00:22:18,388 - so screaming and crying is not an option. - What are you doing? 487 00:22:18,592 --> 00:22:20,785 - I can't meet you after school. - What? You promised. 488 00:22:20,966 --> 00:22:25,397 I have to work on a story for The Franklin. I tried to get out of it, but couldn't. 489 00:22:25,673 --> 00:22:26,991 - Great. - I'm sorry. 490 00:22:27,131 --> 00:22:29,722 No. School comes before Mommy's mental health. 491 00:22:29,921 --> 00:22:32,115 Tell Grandpa to wander around for a while. 492 00:22:32,296 --> 00:22:34,012 - He already did. - Did he see the slinky? 493 00:22:34,170 --> 00:22:37,920 Yes, he saw the slinky. He's here now. He hates my shirt. 494 00:22:38,169 --> 00:22:40,282 Give him a book, have Sookie make him lunch... 495 00:22:40,460 --> 00:22:42,811 I swear I'll be home by dinner, and you won't have to say a word. 496 00:22:42,835 --> 00:22:43,982 Okay, bye. 497 00:22:48,125 --> 00:22:50,033 - I think I got rabies. - It's just a bus. 498 00:22:50,207 --> 00:22:51,843 - It smelled. - Like a bus. 499 00:22:51,999 --> 00:22:53,635 I'll have to burn my clothes. 500 00:22:53,789 --> 00:22:55,858 You have a car. We could have driven. 501 00:22:56,039 --> 00:22:57,993 We have to get the feel of the small-town world. 502 00:22:58,163 --> 00:23:00,470 We won't get the feel of a small town in a BMW. 503 00:23:00,663 --> 00:23:03,969 - Is there something crawling in my hair? - Where do you want to go? 504 00:23:04,203 --> 00:23:06,589 I don't know. Where's the bad part of town? 505 00:23:06,870 --> 00:23:08,188 - Over there. - What? 506 00:23:08,702 --> 00:23:11,736 People. They're very upset with the color of that fence. 507 00:23:12,450 --> 00:23:14,007 This is the town, Paris. 508 00:23:14,158 --> 00:23:17,033 It's not seedy, it's not run-down. It's just Stars Hollow. 509 00:23:17,241 --> 00:23:19,037 - Where's the local bar? - In Woodbridge. 510 00:23:19,199 --> 00:23:20,717 - Why aren't you helping? - I'm trying. 511 00:23:20,782 --> 00:23:22,611 You're looking for something that's not here. 512 00:23:22,781 --> 00:23:24,611 - What's this? - Luke's Diner. 513 00:23:24,780 --> 00:23:27,166 Diner? Okay, good. 514 00:23:35,361 --> 00:23:36,588 What are you doing? 515 00:23:36,735 --> 00:23:38,928 Trying just to blend in, fade away, observe. 516 00:23:39,110 --> 00:23:41,383 - Rory, coffee? - Thanks, Luke. 517 00:23:41,692 --> 00:23:43,920 - Who's your friend? - Angela Lansbury. 518 00:23:44,108 --> 00:23:46,415 - You're the owner here? - Yes. Want some coffee? 519 00:23:46,607 --> 00:23:49,278 - No, thanks. So, you run the diner? - Oh, boy. 520 00:23:49,481 --> 00:23:52,072 - You get a lot of truckers through here? - Truckers? 521 00:23:52,273 --> 00:23:54,988 Guys on the road for weeks, lonely, looking for company... 522 00:23:55,188 --> 00:23:56,222 a little pick-me-up? 523 00:23:56,354 --> 00:23:58,865 - What's she talking about? - Your guess is as good as mine. 524 00:23:59,062 --> 00:24:01,448 It's common knowledge that diners are breeding grounds... 525 00:24:01,645 --> 00:24:03,519 - for prostitution and drug dealers. - What? 526 00:24:03,686 --> 00:24:05,277 Have you ever seen anything like that? 527 00:24:05,436 --> 00:24:07,788 What about that guy over there? What's his story? 528 00:24:07,976 --> 00:24:09,170 Reverend Nichols? 529 00:24:09,309 --> 00:24:11,422 Reverend Nichols? Is that like Dr. Feelgood? 530 00:24:11,600 --> 00:24:13,952 - How much do you like her? - Do what you got to do. 531 00:24:14,141 --> 00:24:16,414 Where did he come from? What's up there? 532 00:24:16,598 --> 00:24:19,428 Is that where you keep the girls? You got a little cathouse? 533 00:24:19,639 --> 00:24:21,469 I think she got you, Uncle Luke. Give up now. 534 00:24:21,639 --> 00:24:22,957 Do not add to this insanity. 535 00:24:23,097 --> 00:24:26,722 An innocent boy like me should not be raised in an atmosphere like this. 536 00:24:26,971 --> 00:24:28,845 I want to be good. Life's just not letting me. 537 00:24:29,011 --> 00:24:30,647 - Get her out of here. - Okay. Let's go. 538 00:24:30,803 --> 00:24:33,110 Why do you need me to leave? What have you got to hide? 539 00:24:33,302 --> 00:24:34,937 Paris, let's go. 540 00:24:36,009 --> 00:24:38,156 - We're aware of it. - We're working on it. 541 00:24:38,342 --> 00:24:41,251 As soon as the towels arrive, your room will get the first one. 542 00:24:41,466 --> 00:24:43,137 No one gets a towel before you do. 543 00:24:43,299 --> 00:24:45,253 Did you get the complimentary champagne? 544 00:24:45,424 --> 00:24:47,537 Just open the champagne and drink, relax, enjoy. 545 00:24:47,715 --> 00:24:48,908 Of course it's free. 546 00:24:49,047 --> 00:24:50,922 - We'll call you soon. - Talk to you soon. 547 00:24:52,338 --> 00:24:53,735 - I'm killing Manny. - I'm helping. 548 00:24:53,879 --> 00:24:56,436 I'm gonna strangle him with one of his own towels. 549 00:24:56,628 --> 00:24:58,458 - Lorelai? - Yeah, Dad? 550 00:24:58,628 --> 00:25:00,825 You realize there are no tablecloths in the dining room? 551 00:25:00,919 --> 00:25:01,952 [Phone ringing] 552 00:25:02,085 --> 00:25:03,769 I do. We're having a problem with our linen delivery. 553 00:25:03,793 --> 00:25:05,384 It doesn't look very professional. 554 00:25:05,543 --> 00:25:07,850 - It's Manny. - I have to take this, Dad. 555 00:25:09,125 --> 00:25:11,875 Manny, my mysterious man, where have you been? 556 00:25:12,249 --> 00:25:14,715 Me, Manny? I'm just a desperate woman. Yes. 557 00:25:14,915 --> 00:25:18,346 I know you have many problems, but I have to have some towels or linens... 558 00:25:18,580 --> 00:25:22,125 or I'm gonna be lying on the street, talking about the inn I used to work at. 559 00:25:22,371 --> 00:25:24,121 You don't want that, do you? 560 00:25:25,037 --> 00:25:27,673 Anything you can do to get me through the night. 561 00:25:29,119 --> 00:25:32,631 Manny, I love you. You rock. I am devoted to you. 562 00:25:32,867 --> 00:25:35,901 I'm never gonna look at another towel without thinking of you. 563 00:25:36,117 --> 00:25:37,549 Thank you. Bye, stud. 564 00:25:38,574 --> 00:25:40,960 - He'll be here in 20 minutes. - Lorelai. 565 00:25:41,157 --> 00:25:43,793 - Yes, Dad? - May I speak to you for a moment? 566 00:25:44,240 --> 00:25:46,148 [Singing softly] Someone is in trouble. 567 00:25:48,072 --> 00:25:49,504 Is something wrong, Dad? 568 00:25:49,655 --> 00:25:52,245 Was that a business call I just overheard there? 569 00:25:52,445 --> 00:25:54,081 That was my linen delivery guy. 570 00:25:54,237 --> 00:25:57,668 - So it was a business call? - Yes, it was a business call. 571 00:25:57,902 --> 00:25:59,777 And that's how you handle a business call? 572 00:25:59,943 --> 00:26:01,852 I've known Manny for 10 years, Dad. 573 00:26:02,026 --> 00:26:03,662 I don't care how long you've known him. 574 00:26:03,817 --> 00:26:05,965 You never talk to a business associate like that... 575 00:26:06,149 --> 00:26:08,376 - especially not one that you employ. - Okay, Dad. 576 00:26:08,565 --> 00:26:11,122 - These people have to respect you. - He does respect me. 577 00:26:11,315 --> 00:26:12,508 You were flirting with him. 578 00:26:12,648 --> 00:26:16,238 I said what I had to say in order to get the linen before somebody else did... 579 00:26:16,480 --> 00:26:18,946 - and I did, so I won. - This isn't about winning. 580 00:26:19,145 --> 00:26:22,736 This is about proper procedure. You need to listen to me, Lorelai. 581 00:26:22,978 --> 00:26:26,683 If there is one thing I know about, it is the correct way to conduct yourself... 582 00:26:26,935 --> 00:26:28,163 in a position of authority. 583 00:26:28,310 --> 00:26:30,820 Do you understand what I'm trying to tell you? 584 00:26:32,809 --> 00:26:35,604 Because I'm only telling you this for your own good. 585 00:26:37,349 --> 00:26:39,337 All right. Go back to work. 586 00:26:40,056 --> 00:26:42,091 I'll be right here if you need me. 587 00:26:42,931 --> 00:26:44,408 Okey-dokey. 588 00:26:50,053 --> 00:26:51,689 [Michel clearing throat] 589 00:26:54,261 --> 00:26:57,090 Nothing. Not even a cigarette butt on the ground. 590 00:26:57,301 --> 00:26:59,653 This town would make Frank Capra want to throw up. 591 00:26:59,842 --> 00:27:03,546 - Sorry, I tried to tell you. - I know. It's just I was so sure. 592 00:27:03,800 --> 00:27:05,674 We'll think of something else to write about. 593 00:27:05,840 --> 00:27:09,669 - We're not going to lose. - There she is. The girl of the moment. 594 00:27:10,006 --> 00:27:13,232 - You, young lady, are my hero. - Why is that, Taylor? 595 00:27:13,463 --> 00:27:14,735 Because in this day and age... 596 00:27:14,879 --> 00:27:18,311 when the kids are willy-nilly with their clothes, hair and morals... 597 00:27:18,545 --> 00:27:22,659 it is heartwarming to see a sensible girl like you still exists. 598 00:27:22,919 --> 00:27:26,067 A girl who has the gumption and guts to stand up and say: 599 00:27:26,292 --> 00:27:29,599 "Why are we allowing this trash out where all our children can see it?" 600 00:27:29,833 --> 00:27:32,503 - And a few selected adults also. - What are you talking about? 601 00:27:32,707 --> 00:27:35,934 Come on in and see for yourself. 602 00:27:37,748 --> 00:27:39,259 What happened? Where is everything? 603 00:27:39,413 --> 00:27:41,641 Thanks to your brilliant suggestion... 604 00:27:41,830 --> 00:27:45,421 they are all safely stashed behind "the Rory curtain." 605 00:27:45,662 --> 00:27:48,458 - The what? - It seemed fitting to name it after you. 606 00:27:48,661 --> 00:27:51,650 No. I don't want a Rory curtain. I never asked for it. 607 00:27:51,868 --> 00:27:54,539 You told me to put that movie where the kids couldn't see it. 608 00:27:54,743 --> 00:27:56,061 You did? 609 00:27:56,201 --> 00:27:59,791 I just meant to put it on a higher shelf, not to get fabric involved. 610 00:28:00,033 --> 00:28:02,543 This is much better than a higher shelf. 611 00:28:02,740 --> 00:28:04,967 Now all the movies that we deem objectionable... 612 00:28:05,156 --> 00:28:07,906 will be safely hidden from the eyes of the children. 613 00:28:08,113 --> 00:28:11,147 Plus, it'll make adults think twice before they go back there. 614 00:28:11,363 --> 00:28:13,193 No. I did not mean to do this. 615 00:28:13,362 --> 00:28:14,590 What are you doing? 616 00:28:14,737 --> 00:28:15,850 - This is it. - What? 617 00:28:15,986 --> 00:28:18,815 Our story. Censorship in a small town. It's perfect. 618 00:28:19,027 --> 00:28:21,016 You know I don't believe in censorship. 619 00:28:21,193 --> 00:28:23,228 Even better. "Small-town minds run amok." 620 00:28:23,400 --> 00:28:25,991 This is genius. It's gold. We're going to win. 621 00:28:26,192 --> 00:28:29,306 Taylor, on the record, how long have you been working here? 622 00:28:31,148 --> 00:28:32,819 Rory, we're home. 623 00:28:32,981 --> 00:28:35,367 Next time, stop the car completely before you get out. 624 00:28:35,564 --> 00:28:37,871 - Rory, for the love of God, be home. - I'm here. 625 00:28:38,063 --> 00:28:40,415 Sorry. I was on the phone. How was your... 626 00:28:40,646 --> 00:28:44,236 I don't think I've ever loved you quite as much as I love you right now. 627 00:28:44,478 --> 00:28:46,546 Ribs cracking. Organs crushing. 628 00:28:46,727 --> 00:28:48,284 Yeah, well, love hurts. 629 00:28:49,185 --> 00:28:50,617 Hey, Grandpa. 630 00:28:50,976 --> 00:28:53,203 - Lovely to see you, Rory. - How was your day? 631 00:28:53,392 --> 00:28:54,664 It was very pleasant. 632 00:28:54,809 --> 00:28:57,161 - I heard you saw Mom in action. - Yes, he did. 633 00:28:57,349 --> 00:29:00,736 - She's great, isn't she? - She's spirited. 634 00:29:00,973 --> 00:29:02,723 - Spirited. - Spirited is nice. 635 00:29:02,972 --> 00:29:05,563 Let's talk dinner. How about Chinese? 636 00:29:05,764 --> 00:29:08,479 - Very spirited food. - Do you like Chinese food? 637 00:29:08,679 --> 00:29:10,587 If prepared properly, I like it very much. 638 00:29:10,762 --> 00:29:12,955 - I'll go call AI's. - AI's? 639 00:29:13,428 --> 00:29:15,019 AI's Pancake World. 640 00:29:15,469 --> 00:29:17,662 I thought you said we were having Chinese food. 641 00:29:17,843 --> 00:29:19,831 AI's has the best Egg Foo Young in Stars Hollow. 642 00:29:20,009 --> 00:29:22,044 Is that saying anything? 643 00:29:22,217 --> 00:29:25,808 Rory, come entertain your grandpa while your spirited mommy orders, please. 644 00:29:26,049 --> 00:29:29,003 Grandpa, do you want to see my room? 645 00:29:29,465 --> 00:29:30,897 Yes, I would. 646 00:29:33,589 --> 00:29:36,577 - $20 if you lock him in there. - $30 if you chill. 647 00:29:37,629 --> 00:29:39,936 - Interesting. - What are you doing? 648 00:29:40,128 --> 00:29:42,514 There are some holes in your collection here... 649 00:29:42,711 --> 00:29:44,779 and I'm just making a list to fill them. 650 00:29:44,960 --> 00:29:47,028 These aren't all of my books. 651 00:29:49,626 --> 00:29:50,978 My goodness. 652 00:29:51,958 --> 00:29:52,956 And... 653 00:29:58,915 --> 00:30:02,380 Possibly, I should concentrate on acquiring you a bookcase first. 654 00:30:02,622 --> 00:30:05,179 That's okay. I kind of like my system. 655 00:30:05,371 --> 00:30:07,042 - Organized chaos? - Exactly. 656 00:30:07,204 --> 00:30:08,601 Very well. Carry on. 657 00:30:09,952 --> 00:30:13,737 I'm glad not to see any death rockers on your walls. 658 00:30:13,993 --> 00:30:15,982 Where did you learn the term "death rockers"? 659 00:30:16,159 --> 00:30:19,386 I'm not entirely unfamiliar with the music world in which you live. 660 00:30:19,617 --> 00:30:22,003 I don't exactly live in the death-rock world. 661 00:30:22,200 --> 00:30:24,108 If I do move there, I will send you a card. 662 00:30:24,282 --> 00:30:25,600 I appreciate that. 663 00:30:27,239 --> 00:30:28,636 - Harvard. - Yeah. 664 00:30:28,781 --> 00:30:30,928 We started the obsession board a few years ago. 665 00:30:31,113 --> 00:30:32,590 When we took that trip to Harvard... 666 00:30:32,738 --> 00:30:35,045 the student store was having a two-for-one flag sale... 667 00:30:35,237 --> 00:30:37,986 so that sent us into the final stage of the psychosis. 668 00:30:38,195 --> 00:30:40,308 Hospitals were called, medications were prescribed. 669 00:30:40,486 --> 00:30:41,554 There is no cure. 670 00:30:41,693 --> 00:30:43,762 Okay, I made the menu for the evening. 671 00:30:43,943 --> 00:30:44,942 My God. 672 00:30:45,068 --> 00:30:47,022 - Looks good. - Who could eat all that food? 673 00:30:47,192 --> 00:30:49,067 - I almost added the garlic chicken. - Add it. 674 00:30:49,233 --> 00:30:51,698 - There are only three of us. - Yes, but we like choices. 675 00:30:51,899 --> 00:30:53,535 Let's call. I'm starved. 676 00:30:56,731 --> 00:30:59,038 Lorelai, you cannot order all that food. 677 00:30:59,272 --> 00:31:01,862 You're teaching your daughter wastefulness and gluttony. 678 00:31:02,063 --> 00:31:03,574 Dad, we do this all the time. 679 00:31:03,729 --> 00:31:05,842 We order way too much and eat a third of it... 680 00:31:06,020 --> 00:31:08,656 and eat leftovers for more than a week. Finely honed system. 681 00:31:08,852 --> 00:31:11,886 Now please just sit and read something or watch TV. 682 00:31:14,975 --> 00:31:16,203 So I... 683 00:31:17,891 --> 00:31:20,448 I noticed all the Harvard paraphernalia in Rory's room. 684 00:31:20,641 --> 00:31:21,709 Yeah. 685 00:31:21,848 --> 00:31:25,360 You might not want to get her settled on one specific college quite so soon. 686 00:31:25,597 --> 00:31:27,233 - Why not? - She's young. 687 00:31:27,388 --> 00:31:30,502 - She hasn't investigated her options. - She wants to go to Harvard. 688 00:31:30,721 --> 00:31:33,232 - Because she thinks you want her to. - I do. 689 00:31:33,428 --> 00:31:36,542 There are a lot of other good schools. You know, I went to Yale. 690 00:31:36,761 --> 00:31:39,670 - Yes, I do know. - Yale is a very fine school. 691 00:31:39,885 --> 00:31:41,919 Some might argue a better school than Harvard. 692 00:31:42,092 --> 00:31:44,842 - Some, meaning you? - I just think Rory should explore it. 693 00:31:45,050 --> 00:31:47,197 I can make some calls, and set up an appointment. 694 00:31:47,382 --> 00:31:48,530 - No. - Why not? 695 00:31:48,674 --> 00:31:50,947 - She wants to go to Harvard. - That's ridiculous. 696 00:31:51,131 --> 00:31:54,165 - Who's going to help her get into Harvard? - Reese Witherspoon. 697 00:31:54,380 --> 00:31:56,812 I am a Yale alumnus. I give money to that school. 698 00:31:57,005 --> 00:31:58,641 Getting her in will be a breeze. 699 00:31:58,795 --> 00:32:00,625 We don't like breezes. They mess up our hair. 700 00:32:00,795 --> 00:32:03,624 - Do not be petulant. - Do not pick a fight with me. 701 00:32:03,836 --> 00:32:06,393 This is not about you. This is about Rory. 702 00:32:06,585 --> 00:32:08,858 No, this is about Richard interfering. 703 00:32:09,043 --> 00:32:10,714 Please, just let me handle this. 704 00:32:10,876 --> 00:32:11,909 [Car honking] 705 00:32:12,042 --> 00:32:13,726 I know more about the Ivy League system than you do. 706 00:32:13,750 --> 00:32:16,977 - Is that the food already? - No, sweets, I haven't ordered yet. 707 00:32:17,208 --> 00:32:18,799 - Oh, my God. - Who is it? 708 00:32:19,081 --> 00:32:20,275 Oh, my God! 709 00:32:24,538 --> 00:32:26,527 - Oh, my God. - What are you doing? 710 00:32:26,704 --> 00:32:28,215 - Just standing here. - Next to? 711 00:32:28,370 --> 00:32:30,597 - A car. Your car. - No. 712 00:32:30,787 --> 00:32:32,345 - I finished it yesterday. - You didn't. 713 00:32:32,495 --> 00:32:33,972 Do you want them? 714 00:32:35,535 --> 00:32:38,171 Now, if you don't like it, I can sell it to someone else. 715 00:32:38,367 --> 00:32:40,799 - Don't you dare. - Dean, that's amazing. 716 00:32:40,992 --> 00:32:43,378 - Can we drive? Does it drive? - Does it drive? 717 00:32:43,574 --> 00:32:46,484 I know it drives, but... I can't believe you finished it. 718 00:32:46,698 --> 00:32:47,732 You built me a car. 719 00:32:47,865 --> 00:32:50,172 Now that the car is done, will you build me a plane? 720 00:32:50,364 --> 00:32:51,682 One that looks like Shamu? 721 00:32:51,822 --> 00:32:53,935 - He made that car? - Isn't that incredible? 722 00:32:54,113 --> 00:32:56,226 - She can't accept it. - Dad, it's okay. 723 00:32:56,404 --> 00:32:57,961 It is not okay. He's a child. 724 00:32:58,112 --> 00:33:00,385 She's not driving a car a child put together. 725 00:33:00,569 --> 00:33:02,683 Excuse me, sir, but my father worked on cars... 726 00:33:02,860 --> 00:33:05,576 and my grandfather worked on cars. I know what I'm doing. 727 00:33:05,777 --> 00:33:08,492 - A car is not a model airplane, young man. - I know that. 728 00:33:08,692 --> 00:33:10,760 - It is a complex vehicle. - I know that, too. 729 00:33:10,941 --> 00:33:13,895 I will not have my granddaughter driving around in a contraption... 730 00:33:14,107 --> 00:33:16,414 - you put together in auto shop. - Can I say something? 731 00:33:16,607 --> 00:33:20,834 I did not make this in auto shop. I'm telling you, this car is safe. 732 00:33:21,105 --> 00:33:23,093 - So you are a certified mechanic? - No. 733 00:33:23,271 --> 00:33:25,908 You had the assistance of a certified mechanic? 734 00:33:26,103 --> 00:33:28,330 Then you drove it past a certified mechanic? 735 00:33:28,519 --> 00:33:31,394 Dad, stop it. This is a nice thing Dean did here. 736 00:33:31,602 --> 00:33:34,193 - Remember, nice things? - I'm sorry, she can't accept it. 737 00:33:34,393 --> 00:33:37,461 Now, if you will excuse us, we were about to order dinner. 738 00:33:37,683 --> 00:33:40,354 I understand you want Rory to be safe, but so do I. 739 00:33:40,558 --> 00:33:43,228 I wouldn't give this car to her if I didn't know for a fact... 740 00:33:43,432 --> 00:33:45,340 that it was 100% safe. 741 00:33:45,514 --> 00:33:49,026 I checked it, my father checked it, and Gypsy at Hewes Brothers checked it. 742 00:33:49,263 --> 00:33:50,457 It has been checked. 743 00:33:50,597 --> 00:33:52,551 I'm supposed to take your word for it? 744 00:33:52,721 --> 00:33:54,278 - No. - Agreed. 745 00:33:54,429 --> 00:33:55,940 - Let's go. - Go where? 746 00:33:56,136 --> 00:33:57,569 - To check it. - I don't think so. 747 00:33:57,719 --> 00:33:59,946 I have been working on this car for months. 748 00:34:00,135 --> 00:34:03,283 - I'm giving it to Rory. - You're a very stubborn boy. 749 00:34:03,509 --> 00:34:05,702 You want to drive? Or should I? 750 00:34:06,009 --> 00:34:08,599 - I'll take my own car, thank you. - Fine with me. 751 00:34:08,841 --> 00:34:11,829 Drive behind me. I don't want it blowing up in front of the Jag. 752 00:34:12,049 --> 00:34:15,197 Try to keep your electrical system working long enough to get there. 753 00:34:15,422 --> 00:34:18,093 They worked the kinks out of this electrical system years ago. 754 00:34:18,297 --> 00:34:20,410 - I'll be right back. - So will I. 755 00:34:25,337 --> 00:34:29,484 I feel like one of us should have stood between them waving a flag or something. 756 00:34:30,668 --> 00:34:31,940 It looks fine to me. 757 00:34:32,084 --> 00:34:34,118 - Check it again. - I already checked it again. 758 00:34:34,292 --> 00:34:37,041 I checked it earlier. This was checking it again. 759 00:34:37,333 --> 00:34:39,083 Go ahead, Gypsy, check it again. 760 00:34:39,249 --> 00:34:40,726 - I've got all night. - I don't. 761 00:34:40,873 --> 00:34:42,623 - Check the transmission. - It's all good. 762 00:34:42,789 --> 00:34:43,936 - The carburetor. - All good. 763 00:34:44,080 --> 00:34:46,228 - Manifold pressure. - Best pressure I've ever seen. 764 00:34:46,413 --> 00:34:48,560 I insist you go over this entire car again. 765 00:34:48,746 --> 00:34:50,576 There's nothing wrong with this car. 766 00:34:50,746 --> 00:34:53,860 I am paying you for a service. I would like that service performed. 767 00:34:54,077 --> 00:34:55,713 Okay, I look again. 768 00:35:01,742 --> 00:35:03,856 How many times are you gonna make her do that? 769 00:35:04,033 --> 00:35:05,669 As many times as it takes. 770 00:35:07,990 --> 00:35:10,581 I know you think I'm not good enough for Rory... 771 00:35:10,781 --> 00:35:14,485 - but do you have to take it out on my car? - She's my only granddaughter. 772 00:35:14,739 --> 00:35:17,853 I have a responsibility to protect her. She's young. 773 00:35:18,404 --> 00:35:20,392 - She's naive. - She's smart. 774 00:35:20,570 --> 00:35:22,763 Yes, she's smart about certain things. 775 00:35:22,944 --> 00:35:25,091 Look, I'm not about to do battle with you here. 776 00:35:25,277 --> 00:35:27,584 You can hate me, whatever. I don't care. 777 00:35:27,818 --> 00:35:30,204 I hardly hate you. I don't even know you. 778 00:35:30,400 --> 00:35:32,116 I'm right here. What do you want to know? 779 00:35:32,275 --> 00:35:34,945 Besides what college I want to go to or what I want to do... 780 00:35:35,149 --> 00:35:37,024 because I still have no answers for you. 781 00:35:37,189 --> 00:35:38,985 Those are not ridiculous questions to ask. 782 00:35:39,148 --> 00:35:42,341 No, but you could have waited until dessert to get to them. 783 00:35:42,564 --> 00:35:46,631 - Yes, well, perhaps, the timing of the... - Interrogation? 784 00:35:46,896 --> 00:35:48,168 - Conversation. - Conversation. 785 00:35:48,312 --> 00:35:51,221 Perhaps the timing was a little off. 786 00:35:58,267 --> 00:35:59,381 So... 787 00:35:59,892 --> 00:36:02,358 Your father. What does he do? 788 00:36:03,640 --> 00:36:05,992 - Stereo systems. - Installing them? 789 00:36:06,556 --> 00:36:09,908 Selling them. He's got a shop a couple of blocks from here. 790 00:36:10,139 --> 00:36:11,411 And your mother? 791 00:36:11,555 --> 00:36:14,589 She works part-time transcribing medical records. 792 00:36:15,512 --> 00:36:17,183 Interesting. 793 00:36:19,969 --> 00:36:21,241 So you... 794 00:36:23,093 --> 00:36:25,604 You like my granddaughter quite a bit. 795 00:36:25,925 --> 00:36:28,721 No, I love your granddaughter quite a bit. 796 00:36:28,924 --> 00:36:32,151 I was beginning to feel a little better about this until you said that. 797 00:36:32,382 --> 00:36:35,655 I'm not trying to make you feel better. I'm trying to be honest. 798 00:36:35,881 --> 00:36:37,234 Yes, you are. 799 00:36:38,131 --> 00:36:40,767 - That's an admirable quality. - Thank you. 800 00:36:41,296 --> 00:36:43,490 Okay, I found something wrong. 801 00:36:43,670 --> 00:36:45,068 - You did? - What? 802 00:36:45,211 --> 00:36:47,961 Windshield wipers came right off in my hand. Very dangerous. 803 00:36:48,170 --> 00:36:49,397 Thank God I checked again. 804 00:36:49,544 --> 00:36:51,215 Gypsy, you broke those off yourself. 805 00:36:51,376 --> 00:36:52,729 - Yes, I did. - Put them back. 806 00:36:52,876 --> 00:36:54,945 I can't look at this car anymore. 807 00:36:55,126 --> 00:36:57,319 - I miss my home. - Put them back. 808 00:37:01,124 --> 00:37:03,510 - I suppose the car is safe. - It is. 809 00:37:03,706 --> 00:37:06,054 I'm still not sure it's an appropriate gift. 810 00:37:06,066 --> 00:37:07,093 I understand that. 811 00:37:12,370 --> 00:37:13,927 How tall are you? 812 00:37:14,828 --> 00:37:16,703 Why? You want to dance? 813 00:37:17,369 --> 00:37:18,801 No, thank you. 814 00:37:22,284 --> 00:37:24,511 I appreciate the offer, though. 815 00:37:26,324 --> 00:37:28,631 - How long are they going to be? - I don't know. 816 00:37:28,824 --> 00:37:32,608 He probably made Dean take the entire thing apart and put it back together again. 817 00:37:32,865 --> 00:37:33,898 Poor Dean. 818 00:37:34,030 --> 00:37:37,620 He has to spend one evening with him. I share chromosomes with the guy. 819 00:37:37,863 --> 00:37:39,499 We had it thoroughly checked. 820 00:37:39,654 --> 00:37:42,290 We found a little problem with the windshield wipers. 821 00:37:42,486 --> 00:37:46,032 Dean is there now, adjusting them. But once that is taken care of... 822 00:37:46,277 --> 00:37:49,265 I don't see any reason why, with proper insurance, of course... 823 00:37:49,484 --> 00:37:52,438 - why you can't have that car. - Really? Thanks. 824 00:37:52,984 --> 00:37:55,699 Hon, why don't you run and pick up the food for us? 825 00:37:55,899 --> 00:37:57,092 I've got this. 826 00:37:57,232 --> 00:37:59,584 Hurry, before the Mu Shu congeals. 827 00:38:01,897 --> 00:38:03,408 Why didn't you let me pay? 828 00:38:03,564 --> 00:38:07,268 I didn't think it would be appropriate under the circumstances. 829 00:38:07,770 --> 00:38:09,566 What circumstances are those? 830 00:38:09,729 --> 00:38:12,843 The ones where I'm about to get really mad at you. 831 00:38:13,061 --> 00:38:14,094 Excuse me? 832 00:38:15,019 --> 00:38:18,723 This is my house and my town, where I live my life. 833 00:38:18,976 --> 00:38:20,487 Thank you for the geography lesson. 834 00:38:20,642 --> 00:38:22,630 In the 32 years we've known each other... 835 00:38:22,808 --> 00:38:26,081 have I once come to your work and criticized the way you handle clients? 836 00:38:26,306 --> 00:38:27,942 I don't remember you coming at all. 837 00:38:28,098 --> 00:38:31,848 Have I passed judgment on your breakfast habits or your clothing choices? 838 00:38:32,097 --> 00:38:33,324 I was offering opinions. 839 00:38:33,471 --> 00:38:36,619 I don't want your opinions, especially not in front of my employees... 840 00:38:36,846 --> 00:38:38,323 and not in front of my friends. 841 00:38:38,470 --> 00:38:40,538 You can't take constructive criticism. 842 00:38:40,720 --> 00:38:42,674 Nothing that came out of your mouth today... 843 00:38:42,844 --> 00:38:46,594 might in any universe, visited by Kirk or Spock, be construed as constructive. 844 00:38:46,843 --> 00:38:47,842 I beg to differ. 845 00:38:47,967 --> 00:38:51,240 And this is the last time you come into my house and overrule my word. 846 00:38:51,466 --> 00:38:54,693 - What are you talking about? - I'm talking about Dean and the car. 847 00:38:54,923 --> 00:38:57,389 - I was being... - You have no right being anything. 848 00:38:57,589 --> 00:38:59,941 Rory's my kid, and I make the rules. 849 00:39:00,131 --> 00:39:01,449 If she comes home and says: 850 00:39:01,588 --> 00:39:04,258 "I'm gonna spend the weekend with Patricia Krenwinkel"... 851 00:39:04,462 --> 00:39:07,053 and I say, "Okay, grab a sweater," you just have to deal. 852 00:39:07,253 --> 00:39:08,367 Who's Patricia Krenwinkel? 853 00:39:08,503 --> 00:39:11,617 If I tell her she can have the car her boyfriend made for her... 854 00:39:11,835 --> 00:39:14,267 - then she can. - I didn't think it looked safe. 855 00:39:14,459 --> 00:39:15,970 I have to think it looks safe. 856 00:39:16,126 --> 00:39:17,922 Why can't I make you hear what I'm saying? 857 00:39:18,083 --> 00:39:19,640 I hear exactly what you're saying. 858 00:39:19,791 --> 00:39:21,621 You came here as the judgment police. 859 00:39:21,791 --> 00:39:24,347 You kept your uniform on, and it comes off now. 860 00:39:24,540 --> 00:39:26,336 - Lower your voice. - I am a grown woman. 861 00:39:26,497 --> 00:39:29,724 Treat me the way you treat people who have invited you to their house... 862 00:39:29,955 --> 00:39:31,785 - or you will not be invited again. - Invited? 863 00:39:31,954 --> 00:39:34,340 Don't you think I know why you "invited" me here? 864 00:39:34,537 --> 00:39:36,969 - Because... - Because your mother asked you to. 865 00:39:37,161 --> 00:39:39,513 She called you up and said I was driving her crazy. 866 00:39:39,702 --> 00:39:42,168 Would you please take me off her hands for one day... 867 00:39:42,368 --> 00:39:44,481 so she could get some peace, isn't that true? 868 00:39:44,659 --> 00:39:48,284 You have never once invited me to your house, Lorelai. Never. 869 00:39:48,741 --> 00:39:51,775 I can hardly point to an event that would prompt you to do so... 870 00:39:51,990 --> 00:39:54,184 except my recent employment situation. 871 00:39:54,364 --> 00:39:56,239 Okay, Dad, Mom did call me, but... 872 00:39:56,406 --> 00:39:58,713 I never thought about retirement. 873 00:39:58,904 --> 00:40:02,779 I never thought about what I would do or what I would be once I wasn't working. 874 00:40:03,028 --> 00:40:06,574 I never once imagined that I would go from being a productive member... 875 00:40:06,819 --> 00:40:08,171 of the human race... 876 00:40:08,318 --> 00:40:11,944 to a decrepit old drone sitting at the club at 3:00 in the afternoon... 877 00:40:12,192 --> 00:40:14,181 drinking brandy and playing cards. 878 00:40:14,358 --> 00:40:17,870 I am an annoyance to my wife and a burden to my daughter. 879 00:40:19,190 --> 00:40:22,815 Suddenly I realize what it feels like to be obsolete. 880 00:40:24,106 --> 00:40:27,457 I hope that you never have to learn what that feels like. 881 00:40:27,688 --> 00:40:29,597 Now, if you'll excuse me. 882 00:40:29,812 --> 00:40:33,641 I'm afraid I'll have to take a rain check on dinner. I'm not very hungry. 883 00:40:45,933 --> 00:40:47,682 - Nice picture. - Gee, thanks. 884 00:40:47,849 --> 00:40:49,440 You're very popular right now. 885 00:40:49,598 --> 00:40:52,393 I bet if you burn a few books, they'd probably make you mayor. 886 00:40:52,597 --> 00:40:54,505 - This is ridiculous. - I don't know. 887 00:40:54,680 --> 00:40:56,237 You have a lot of supporters on this. 888 00:40:56,388 --> 00:40:59,502 Pat Buchanan, Jerry Falwell, Kathie Lee Gifford. 889 00:40:59,720 --> 00:41:01,867 - Bye. - Come on, it's a little funny. 890 00:41:02,053 --> 00:41:03,086 No. 891 00:41:03,219 --> 00:41:05,810 Being the poster girl for censorship is not a little funny. 892 00:41:06,010 --> 00:41:08,919 The only videos not behind that curtain are Bambi and Dumbo. 893 00:41:09,134 --> 00:41:10,333 They actually had a meeting... 894 00:41:10,467 --> 00:41:12,580 about whether Babe should be behind the curtain... 895 00:41:12,758 --> 00:41:14,666 so as not to offend people who keep kosher. 896 00:41:14,841 --> 00:41:16,238 It's a crazy world we live in. 897 00:41:16,382 --> 00:41:18,529 Where did they even find that stupid picture? 898 00:41:18,714 --> 00:41:20,987 The picture's good. It's the people who are stupid. 899 00:41:21,172 --> 00:41:24,160 - I'll never be able to leave my house. - At least you won't starve. 900 00:41:24,380 --> 00:41:26,016 I can't look at it anymore. 901 00:41:26,170 --> 00:41:28,727 Relax. I don't think it'll be around very long. 902 00:41:28,920 --> 00:41:31,590 - Why? - Just a guess. 903 00:41:33,502 --> 00:41:34,536 Jess. 904 00:41:34,668 --> 00:41:36,259 - Enjoy the food. - Come back here. 905 00:41:36,418 --> 00:41:38,373 - Why? - I'll give you an egg roll. 906 00:41:41,791 --> 00:41:43,462 - Yes? - What did you do? 907 00:41:43,624 --> 00:41:45,737 Nothing much. Just wanted to make sure... 908 00:41:45,915 --> 00:41:48,142 whoever rented Dumbo or Bambi gets a little surprise. 909 00:41:48,331 --> 00:41:50,205 What kind of a surprise? 910 00:41:50,372 --> 00:41:52,929 - What did you do? - You owe me an egg roll. 911 00:41:56,203 --> 00:41:57,317 Yuck. 912 00:42:12,157 --> 00:42:14,464 Richard, there you are, sneaking in like that. 913 00:42:14,657 --> 00:42:16,725 - Hello, Emily. - Nice to see you. 914 00:42:16,906 --> 00:42:18,053 You seem very happy. 915 00:42:18,197 --> 00:42:20,310 I had a very nice day. Would you like a drink? 916 00:42:20,488 --> 00:42:23,795 I saw Cheeky Lennox today. She's redoing her entire house. 917 00:42:24,028 --> 00:42:26,938 I have to say, it's given me a few ideas about this place. 918 00:42:27,152 --> 00:42:30,107 I won't scare you with them tonight, but I'm very excited about it. 919 00:42:30,318 --> 00:42:31,352 I'm glad. 920 00:42:31,485 --> 00:42:34,155 Then I did a little shopping and had my nails done. 921 00:42:34,359 --> 00:42:35,428 Very nice. 922 00:42:35,566 --> 00:42:38,476 Sugar and Spice, a little crazier than I usually wear... 923 00:42:38,691 --> 00:42:41,202 but I don't know, I was just in that kind of a mood. 924 00:42:41,399 --> 00:42:43,546 So how was your day with the girls? 925 00:42:43,731 --> 00:42:45,605 - Wonderful. - Tell me about it. 926 00:42:45,772 --> 00:42:48,363 Well, I saw the town, I saw Lorelai's work. 927 00:42:48,605 --> 00:42:51,400 Did you eat? I can have Heloise whip up something for you. 928 00:42:51,604 --> 00:42:53,002 No, thank you. We had Chinese food. 929 00:42:53,145 --> 00:42:55,292 - You love Chinese food. - I do. 930 00:42:55,478 --> 00:42:57,671 Well, I'm thrilled you had such a wonderful time. 931 00:42:57,852 --> 00:43:00,283 - It was good for you to get out like that. - Yes, it was. 932 00:43:00,726 --> 00:43:03,475 In fact, I'm still a little energized from the day... 933 00:43:03,684 --> 00:43:06,321 so I think I'm finally going to organize all those stamps... 934 00:43:06,516 --> 00:43:08,232 that I've been talking about for ages. 935 00:43:08,391 --> 00:43:09,505 - Now? - Why not? 936 00:43:09,640 --> 00:43:12,788 I think that would be wonderful. Have fun.