1 00:00:04,906 --> 00:00:05,828 Yes? 2 00:00:06,340 --> 00:00:08,646 Um, Paris, it's Lorelai. 3 00:00:09,159 --> 00:00:11,208 Come in. The door is open. 4 00:00:13,406 --> 00:00:15,717 I'm so sorry that it's so early. I -- 5 00:00:15,747 --> 00:00:17,028 Oh. Wow. Hey. 6 00:00:17,058 --> 00:00:19,651 Sorry. We're in the middle of our yoga practice. 7 00:00:19,681 --> 00:00:22,756 I didn't really imagine you guys to be the yoga types. 8 00:00:22,786 --> 00:00:24,793 It was a circuitous path that led us here. 9 00:00:24,823 --> 00:00:27,010 I only signed up for the class 'cause I thought it'd help me 10 00:00:27,046 --> 00:00:29,280 B.S. my way through any med-school interviews 11 00:00:29,311 --> 00:00:32,537 when they talk about all that homeopathic, holistic, 12 00:00:32,562 --> 00:00:34,956 naturopathic, chiropractic, TCM, 13 00:00:34,985 --> 00:00:36,594 unani, ayurveda crap. 14 00:00:36,629 --> 00:00:39,622 Plus, we thought it would be funny to goof on. But now... 15 00:00:39,657 --> 00:00:41,813 I guess the great cosmic goof is on us. 16 00:00:41,848 --> 00:00:43,430 Is Rory asleep? 17 00:00:43,467 --> 00:00:45,341 You mean spiritually or literally? 18 00:00:45,377 --> 00:00:46,122 Literally. 19 00:00:46,157 --> 00:00:47,471 Yeah, I think so. 20 00:00:51,475 --> 00:00:52,491 Hey, mom. 21 00:00:52,527 --> 00:00:55,493 Hey. Sorry I didn't call first. I left my phone at home. 22 00:00:55,525 --> 00:00:57,052 And it's 6:00 in the morning. Why are you up? 23 00:00:57,088 --> 00:00:59,221 Paris and Doyle were chanting. Why are you up? 24 00:00:59,258 --> 00:01:01,222 Oh, I've been up for a while, driving -- 25 00:01:01,256 --> 00:01:02,610 - Driving? - Yeah, for a few hours. 26 00:01:02,627 --> 00:01:03,670 - Driving? - Yeah, driving. 27 00:01:03,707 --> 00:01:05,552 - Mom, what's going on? - Want to go for a drive? 28 00:01:05,585 --> 00:01:07,693 Um, sure. Let's go for a drive. 29 00:01:11,136 --> 00:01:12,732 So... we're driving. 30 00:01:12,767 --> 00:01:13,992 Yeah, we're driving. 31 00:01:20,178 --> 00:01:22,941 Honey, your dad and I split up last night. 32 00:01:23,597 --> 00:01:26,782 Oh, mom, I'm so sorry. Are you okay? 33 00:01:26,815 --> 00:01:28,911 I'm okay -- I'm driving, moving forward. 34 00:01:28,948 --> 00:01:30,492 - You are driving. - Yep. 35 00:01:30,996 --> 00:01:33,753 It just wasn't right, you know? And he knew it wasn't right, 36 00:01:33,788 --> 00:01:35,832 and I knew it wasn't right. It just wasn't... 37 00:01:36,685 --> 00:01:38,122 - It wasn't right. - It wasn't, 38 00:01:38,155 --> 00:01:40,281 and pretending it was was just gonna hurt him and hurt me, 39 00:01:40,318 --> 00:01:42,990 and we didn't want to do that, so we split up, 40 00:01:43,026 --> 00:01:46,163 and he's moving out, and... what are you thinking? 41 00:01:46,198 --> 00:01:49,430 I don't know. I guess, first of all, I'm sorry. 42 00:01:49,466 --> 00:01:52,503 I'm so sorry. And... secondly... 43 00:01:52,677 --> 00:01:56,002 I guess I'm thinking that I'm not totally surprised. 44 00:01:56,035 --> 00:02:01,102 I mean, at first, I was so excited that you guys were getting together 45 00:02:01,137 --> 00:02:03,252 because it seemed like something that was meant to be, 46 00:02:03,288 --> 00:02:05,551 something that was like destiny. 47 00:02:05,588 --> 00:02:08,330 But... then... I guess... 48 00:02:08,505 --> 00:02:10,951 to me, it kind of never felt right. 49 00:02:11,327 --> 00:02:12,361 I'm so sorry. 50 00:02:12,395 --> 00:02:16,031 I just want you to know, your dad is gonna be in your life -- in our lives. 51 00:02:16,067 --> 00:02:17,100 I know that. 52 00:02:17,138 --> 00:02:18,783 And G.G., too. I mean, 53 00:02:19,477 --> 00:02:21,190 your dad is still your dad, you know? 54 00:02:21,228 --> 00:02:23,070 I know that, mom. I do. 55 00:02:24,686 --> 00:02:26,622 So, who else knows? 56 00:02:27,158 --> 00:02:28,553 Nobody. That's it. 57 00:02:28,585 --> 00:02:30,871 Well, you and the Quickie Mart guy. 58 00:02:30,908 --> 00:02:32,262 You told the Quickie Mart guy? 59 00:02:32,296 --> 00:02:34,132 I was upset. I was standing by the magazines. 60 00:02:34,166 --> 00:02:37,270 I didn't want him to think I was verklempt over Nicole Richie so... 61 00:02:37,975 --> 00:02:40,403 that's it. I wish I could leave it at that. 62 00:02:40,436 --> 00:02:43,652 The idea of telling your grandmother -- God. 63 00:02:44,808 --> 00:02:47,962 - Oh. Oh, wow. - What? 64 00:02:49,255 --> 00:02:50,911 We're out of gas? 65 00:02:50,946 --> 00:02:52,672 We're out of... gas. 66 00:02:58,657 --> 00:03:01,221 - I've never run out of gas before. - Me neither. 67 00:03:02,287 --> 00:03:03,641 Well, here we are. 68 00:03:04,135 --> 00:03:05,403 Out of gas. 69 00:03:06,005 --> 00:03:07,532 Well, I guess I should ca-- 70 00:03:07,898 --> 00:03:09,220 I don't have my cellphone. 71 00:03:10,787 --> 00:03:12,562 I left mine in my room. 72 00:03:14,955 --> 00:03:17,630 Okay. It's okay. No, it's fine. 73 00:03:17,667 --> 00:03:20,301 We'll just have to get gas somehow. We can do this. 74 00:03:20,338 --> 00:03:24,003 There's a gas station up ahead, where route 68 goes through Naugatuck. 75 00:03:24,036 --> 00:03:25,113 Okay. 76 00:03:25,468 --> 00:03:27,681 So... we're walking? 77 00:03:27,715 --> 00:03:29,072 Oh, we're walking. 78 00:03:37,425 --> 00:03:38,870 Well, it's a beautiful day. 79 00:03:38,906 --> 00:03:40,251 Yes, it is. 80 00:03:40,538 --> 00:03:42,322 It's weird that it can be so beautiful. 81 00:03:42,358 --> 00:03:43,492 Yeah. 82 00:03:44,016 --> 00:03:46,112 How far is Naugatuck from here? 83 00:03:46,166 --> 00:03:47,800 I don't know exactly. 84 00:03:48,238 --> 00:03:50,200 I guess it's walking distance. 85 00:03:50,998 --> 00:03:52,943 I hope it's walking distance. 86 00:04:52,428 --> 00:04:53,371 Hello? 87 00:04:53,775 --> 00:04:55,142 - Hi, there. - How you doing? 88 00:04:55,177 --> 00:04:57,090 - How are you? - May I take your coats? 89 00:04:57,136 --> 00:04:59,292 - Coats? - Oh. Okay. 90 00:04:59,648 --> 00:05:00,712 Thank you. 91 00:05:01,535 --> 00:05:04,631 Um-- I-- th-- I think she's in the living room. 92 00:05:04,668 --> 00:05:06,330 I'm not sure-- maybe-- not sure-- 93 00:05:07,487 --> 00:05:09,553 What? Her mouth is moving. 94 00:05:09,585 --> 00:05:11,263 I can't hear anything. Is something wrong with my ears? 95 00:05:11,296 --> 00:05:12,973 No, I don't think it's your ears, poor thing. 96 00:05:13,008 --> 00:05:15,893 This house is a giant skinner box with chippendale chairs. Hello? 97 00:05:15,928 --> 00:05:17,101 In here! 98 00:05:18,207 --> 00:05:19,601 - Hey, mom. - Hey, grandma. 99 00:05:19,637 --> 00:05:21,782 Hello, Rory, Lorelai. How are you? 100 00:05:21,815 --> 00:05:25,103 Good. How are you? How's dad? Is he up to this, you think? 101 00:05:25,138 --> 00:05:25,940 Why wouldn't he be? 102 00:05:25,976 --> 00:05:29,932 Well, mom, he just got out of the hospital. I wonder if it's too soon. 103 00:05:29,968 --> 00:05:32,802 The doctor said there's no reason he can't go back to his normal routine, 104 00:05:32,838 --> 00:05:34,941 as long as he doesn't do anything too strenuous. 105 00:05:34,978 --> 00:05:37,931 It's not as though sitting at a table, having dinner with one's family 106 00:05:37,968 --> 00:05:39,512 requires a great deal of effort. 107 00:05:39,546 --> 00:05:41,513 Well... you're right. 108 00:05:42,575 --> 00:05:44,010 He should be down by now. 109 00:05:44,658 --> 00:05:45,992 Is Christopher coming? 110 00:05:46,028 --> 00:05:49,103 Um... he's not able to make it tonight. I'm sorry. 111 00:05:49,135 --> 00:05:50,112 Well... 112 00:05:50,537 --> 00:05:51,661 that's too bad. 113 00:05:52,695 --> 00:05:54,951 In the meantime, can I offer you a drink? 114 00:05:54,985 --> 00:05:57,811 Yes. The usual -- Martini up, with a twist. 115 00:05:57,846 --> 00:06:00,571 Oh, I'm sorry. I'm not serving alcohol tonight. 116 00:06:00,758 --> 00:06:02,751 I told you there was something wrong with my ears. What? 117 00:06:02,788 --> 00:06:05,000 I'm serving nonalcoholic cocktails only. 118 00:06:05,036 --> 00:06:06,951 There's no such thing as a nonalcoholic cocktail. 119 00:06:06,987 --> 00:06:09,173 There most certainly is. It's called a mocktail. 120 00:06:09,307 --> 00:06:11,132 - You're serving mocktails? - Yes. 121 00:06:11,167 --> 00:06:13,721 I can offer you a Shirley Temple or a Roy Rogers. 122 00:06:13,756 --> 00:06:14,930 I'll have a Roy Rogers. 123 00:06:14,967 --> 00:06:17,463 Why not a howdy doody or a captain Kangaroo? 124 00:06:17,498 --> 00:06:20,533 Lorelai, stop being so selfish. We're doing this for your father. 125 00:06:20,565 --> 00:06:24,241 After you've had open-heart surgery, alcohol is strictly verboten. 126 00:06:24,275 --> 00:06:26,222 No alcohol. No alcohol. 127 00:06:26,258 --> 00:06:29,262 Well, there you are. I told you to tell Mr. Gilmore 128 00:06:29,298 --> 00:06:30,822 that his daughter and granddaughter 129 00:06:30,858 --> 00:06:33,391 were pulling into the driveway 15 minutes ago. 130 00:06:33,428 --> 00:06:35,681 Mr. Gilmore says he's in the middle of watching golf 131 00:06:35,717 --> 00:06:37,471 and he'll be down as soon as he's finished. 132 00:06:37,508 --> 00:06:39,612 Golf? He's watching golf? 133 00:06:39,915 --> 00:06:41,960 Well, if you tell him we're expecting him downstairs, 134 00:06:41,997 --> 00:06:43,271 I would very much appreciate it. 135 00:06:43,307 --> 00:06:46,493 I'm not really sure that falls under my job description. 136 00:06:47,778 --> 00:06:49,820 Fine. Fine. 137 00:06:50,207 --> 00:06:51,353 Fine. 138 00:06:51,945 --> 00:06:53,233 Fine. 139 00:06:54,758 --> 00:06:56,790 - Here you go. - Thank you. 140 00:06:58,725 --> 00:07:01,072 Oh, that's a strong one, mom. You know I'm driving. 141 00:07:01,237 --> 00:07:02,113 Tastes great. 142 00:07:02,145 --> 00:07:03,541 You know what se tastes great? Rum. 143 00:07:03,556 --> 00:07:05,070 For heaven's sake, Lorelai. 144 00:07:05,101 --> 00:07:07,397 If you're unable to go for a few hours without alcohol, 145 00:07:07,422 --> 00:07:09,826 I can send the maid out to get you a six-pack. 146 00:07:10,185 --> 00:07:12,784 - Richard! - All right. I'm here. 147 00:07:12,819 --> 00:07:14,393 You can put away your leash. 148 00:07:14,428 --> 00:07:15,960 - Hey, grandpa. - Hey, dad. 149 00:07:16,158 --> 00:07:18,600 - Rory, Lorelai. - How are you feeling? 150 00:07:18,635 --> 00:07:20,283 Like a man who's been torn away 151 00:07:20,316 --> 00:07:22,650 from one of the most pivotal golf matches in history. 152 00:07:22,687 --> 00:07:24,452 If you're not up for it, we can take a rain check. 153 00:07:24,485 --> 00:07:25,780 We don't need a rain check. 154 00:07:25,818 --> 00:07:27,831 Richard, wouldn't you like to change for dinner? 155 00:07:27,866 --> 00:07:29,523 No, if you're going to treat me like a patient, 156 00:07:29,555 --> 00:07:32,103 I'm going to act like a patient. Patients wear robes. 157 00:07:32,135 --> 00:07:35,433 All right. Fine. May I offer you a mocktail? 158 00:07:35,468 --> 00:07:37,022 No. I don't want a mocktail. 159 00:07:37,058 --> 00:07:39,772 In fact, I'd like to skip "mocktail hour" altogether 160 00:07:39,806 --> 00:07:41,191 and go straight to dinner. 161 00:07:41,225 --> 00:07:43,031 But it isn't time yet to -- 162 00:07:44,455 --> 00:07:46,313 All right. We'll eat now. 163 00:07:46,347 --> 00:07:48,912 Francette, would you please go tell Aurora to tell Stefan 164 00:07:48,946 --> 00:07:50,842 we are ready to have dinner served now? 165 00:07:50,877 --> 00:07:53,080 Look, Mrs. Gilmore, I have to reiterate, 166 00:07:53,115 --> 00:07:55,122 I am here as a medical professional, 167 00:07:55,155 --> 00:07:56,463 not a carrier pigeon. 168 00:07:56,496 --> 00:07:59,560 Well, as a medical professional, you should be concerned with my health. 169 00:07:59,596 --> 00:08:02,273 And not eating isn't healthy, is it? 170 00:08:02,307 --> 00:08:04,101 Nor is getting agitated. 171 00:08:04,135 --> 00:08:06,611 And I have to tell you, Francette, I'm getting quite agitated. 172 00:08:06,646 --> 00:08:08,082 Don't threaten me, Mr. Gilmore. 173 00:08:08,115 --> 00:08:10,521 It's fine, it's fine. I'll go tell her myself. 174 00:08:12,587 --> 00:08:13,641 Wow. 175 00:08:13,858 --> 00:08:16,040 A six-pack sounds really good right now. 176 00:08:19,636 --> 00:08:20,800 Here's your plate, sir. 177 00:08:20,836 --> 00:08:23,073 I hope it's not too hot -- the plate, not the food. 178 00:08:27,136 --> 00:08:30,021 Oh, well. It's fish again. 179 00:08:30,056 --> 00:08:31,201 It's sea bass. 180 00:08:31,238 --> 00:08:33,642 And sea bass is a fish -- hence my comment 181 00:08:33,676 --> 00:08:36,360 "surprise, surprise -- it's fish again." 182 00:08:36,396 --> 00:08:37,402 It tastes good. 183 00:08:37,435 --> 00:08:38,381 Tastes like fish. 184 00:08:38,415 --> 00:08:39,880 I don't think it tastes fishy. 185 00:08:39,916 --> 00:08:41,560 Sea bash is not a fishy fish. 186 00:08:41,598 --> 00:08:44,792 Mackerel is a fishy fish. Trout can be a fishy fish. 187 00:08:44,828 --> 00:08:47,290 But sea bass is not really a fishy fish. 188 00:08:47,328 --> 00:08:50,623 I didn't say it tasted fishy. I said it tasted like fish. 189 00:08:50,655 --> 00:08:51,921 I think it tastes good. 190 00:08:51,958 --> 00:08:54,520 The green beans are very green-beany, which is so good, 191 00:08:54,557 --> 00:08:56,473 especially if you like green beans, which I do. 192 00:08:57,966 --> 00:08:59,512 Anyone see any good movies lately? 193 00:08:59,548 --> 00:09:01,642 - No. - This fish is bland. 194 00:09:02,198 --> 00:09:04,232 Would you like some more lemon-dill sauce? 195 00:09:04,265 --> 00:09:05,121 No. 196 00:09:05,527 --> 00:09:06,373 Okay. 197 00:09:06,405 --> 00:09:07,621 The sauce is good, mom. 198 00:09:07,656 --> 00:09:08,881 It's nice, isn't it? 199 00:09:08,918 --> 00:09:10,280 Tart, but not too tart. 200 00:09:10,316 --> 00:09:13,483 Stefan, the chef we stole from the Lowells, is doing a marvelous job 201 00:09:13,515 --> 00:09:15,541 incorporating the dietary recommendations -- 202 00:09:15,578 --> 00:09:16,711 Enough. 203 00:09:16,958 --> 00:09:18,972 If forced, I may eat this fish, 204 00:09:19,007 --> 00:09:22,853 but I absolutely refuse to waste my time having a conversation about it. 205 00:09:23,517 --> 00:09:27,481 So, Lorelai, I take it that Christopher is still out of town? 206 00:09:27,517 --> 00:09:29,081 He couldn't make it tonight. 207 00:09:29,118 --> 00:09:30,190 That's too bad. 208 00:09:30,226 --> 00:09:32,372 That man has been traveling quite a lot lately. 209 00:09:32,405 --> 00:09:33,331 Oh yeah? I guess. 210 00:09:33,368 --> 00:09:36,112 I hope he'll be around for the party your mother's planning. 211 00:09:36,148 --> 00:09:37,651 I know I'm looking forward to it. 212 00:09:37,687 --> 00:09:40,632 It's my only hope for eating a decent meal in the forceable future. 213 00:09:40,667 --> 00:09:43,343 Your mother was planning to serve cornish game hens. 214 00:09:43,375 --> 00:09:44,861 Is that still the plan, Emily? 215 00:09:44,897 --> 00:09:47,190 Yes, I've even spoken to the caterer about preparing 216 00:09:47,228 --> 00:09:48,921 a special skinless hen for you. 217 00:09:48,958 --> 00:09:50,893 Oh, for heaven's sakes. 218 00:09:50,925 --> 00:09:52,373 Don't get angry, Richard. 219 00:09:52,407 --> 00:09:54,353 It's your doctor's orders, not mine. 220 00:09:54,388 --> 00:09:56,072 You know what? I'm full. 221 00:09:56,428 --> 00:09:57,941 These flowers are pretty. 222 00:09:57,977 --> 00:09:59,470 They really are nice. 223 00:09:59,507 --> 00:10:01,621 If you will excuse me, I have to get back to my golf. 224 00:10:01,636 --> 00:10:02,960 - Richard! - Please. 225 00:10:02,995 --> 00:10:05,181 I know I've missed Jacklin's bogey on the 16th. 226 00:10:05,217 --> 00:10:06,942 I'm not missing his putt on the 17th. 227 00:10:06,977 --> 00:10:08,631 That's a famous putt, Emily. 228 00:10:08,668 --> 00:10:11,460 Wait -- you're watching an old golf game? 229 00:10:11,498 --> 00:10:14,600 Well, it's the last singles match of the '69 Ryder cup. 230 00:10:14,708 --> 00:10:16,732 Jacklin, Nicklaus -- the concession! 231 00:10:16,766 --> 00:10:20,211 I can't believe you're watching an old golf game instead of eating... 232 00:10:20,248 --> 00:10:22,050 - Fish? - Dinner with your family. 233 00:10:22,085 --> 00:10:23,621 You already know how it's going to turn out. 234 00:10:23,655 --> 00:10:25,983 Well, that never stopped people going to see "Hamlet." 235 00:10:26,105 --> 00:10:28,870 Lorelai, Rory, good night. Emily. 236 00:10:30,388 --> 00:10:33,112 Richard... Richard! 237 00:10:34,106 --> 00:10:37,472 The idea that two grown men hitting a tiny ball with metal sticks 238 00:10:37,505 --> 00:10:40,221 is the equivalent of "Hamlet" -- ridiculous. 239 00:10:40,257 --> 00:10:43,071 But can I say anything? No! Because I can't agitate him. 240 00:10:43,108 --> 00:10:45,602 It is ridiculous. Golf is really more like "Richard III." 241 00:10:45,637 --> 00:10:46,720 They're all hunched over. 242 00:10:46,756 --> 00:10:48,050 I'm going to go get him. 243 00:10:52,726 --> 00:10:56,181 It sounds like grandma's going full steam ahead with this whole party-planning thing. 244 00:10:56,216 --> 00:10:56,890 I know! 245 00:10:56,927 --> 00:10:59,403 She's going to kill 400 cornish game hens -- 246 00:10:59,435 --> 00:11:01,000 probably with her own bare hands. 247 00:11:01,038 --> 00:11:02,470 Your grandfather just had a heart attack. 248 00:11:02,506 --> 00:11:03,820 Your grandmother is not drinking. 249 00:11:03,828 --> 00:11:07,753 This isn't exactly the ideal time to tell them their only daughter's marriage is over. 250 00:11:07,788 --> 00:11:08,690 I know. 251 00:11:08,725 --> 00:11:10,421 I don't know what she'll do. She's gone bananas. 252 00:11:10,457 --> 00:11:13,033 For all I know, she'll throw a molotov mocktail at me. 253 00:11:13,066 --> 00:11:16,340 I know, but only you can save the cornish game hens. 254 00:11:16,376 --> 00:11:18,573 Save the cornish game hens! 255 00:11:30,428 --> 00:11:32,680 Hey, hey! What are you doing? Get back in bed. 256 00:11:32,716 --> 00:11:34,313 I just want to check my e-mail real quick. 257 00:11:34,348 --> 00:11:36,491 - Oh, no, no, no. - What's the big deal? 258 00:11:36,526 --> 00:11:39,791 I made you a special birthday breakfast in bed, 259 00:11:39,825 --> 00:11:42,311 and if you don't go back to bed, it's gonna be a special birthday breakfast 260 00:11:42,345 --> 00:11:44,231 at a desk, which is something I have never heard of. 261 00:11:44,265 --> 00:11:45,271 Happy birthday. 262 00:11:45,745 --> 00:11:48,313 Now it is, now that there are cinnamon buns in the picture. 263 00:11:48,348 --> 00:11:50,300 Are you impressed? It's my specialty. 264 00:11:50,336 --> 00:11:51,830 I can cook anything that comes in a tube. 265 00:11:51,868 --> 00:11:53,590 I am impressed and hungry. 266 00:11:53,965 --> 00:11:56,661 Get back in bed! You are the birthday boy. 267 00:11:56,697 --> 00:11:58,943 You should not be working. You should be luxuriating, 268 00:11:58,976 --> 00:12:01,342 eating peeled grapes and being fanned with palm fronds. 269 00:12:01,376 --> 00:12:04,240 Peeled grapes? Well, what if the birthday boy gets back in bed 270 00:12:04,276 --> 00:12:05,672 but is allowed to bring his laptop? 271 00:12:05,695 --> 00:12:06,541 Deal. 272 00:12:06,646 --> 00:12:08,850 Somebody's pretty into this whole birthday thing. 273 00:12:08,888 --> 00:12:13,240 If by "birthday thing," you mean the celebration of the miracle of your birth, 274 00:12:13,276 --> 00:12:15,730 the anniversary of the day when this world went from being 275 00:12:15,768 --> 00:12:18,992 a world without Logan Hunzberger to a world with Logan Hunzberger, 276 00:12:19,026 --> 00:12:21,010 then, yes, I'm pretty into it. 277 00:12:21,048 --> 00:12:22,980 You really love me, don't you? 278 00:12:23,015 --> 00:12:23,951 You're okay. 279 00:12:23,985 --> 00:12:26,581 I'm not used to all this hoopla. Birthdays aren't a very big deal 280 00:12:26,617 --> 00:12:28,353 - in the Hunzberger family. - Why not? 281 00:12:28,386 --> 00:12:30,172 Because birthdays aren't something you achieve. 282 00:12:30,206 --> 00:12:32,850 Why should you be lauded for something that just happens to you? 283 00:12:32,886 --> 00:12:35,152 Didn't you have birthday parties when you were a kid? 284 00:12:35,217 --> 00:12:36,761 They were parties, sort of, 285 00:12:36,797 --> 00:12:38,851 but not with any kids I actually knew. 286 00:12:38,888 --> 00:12:40,060 That sounds like a blast. 287 00:12:40,096 --> 00:12:41,460 I never had a regular birthday cake. 288 00:12:41,495 --> 00:12:44,353 I always wanted just a good old, plain yellow cake, with frosting. 289 00:12:44,385 --> 00:12:47,263 But desserts were some fancy flambé thing with alcohol. 290 00:12:47,295 --> 00:12:50,743 Well, those years of birthday neglect will become a faint memory 291 00:12:50,777 --> 00:12:52,211 after the Gilmore treatment. 292 00:12:52,248 --> 00:12:54,452 Plenty of hoopla in a Gilmore birthday, huh? 293 00:12:54,655 --> 00:12:57,333 Hoopla and then some. My mom always went all out. 294 00:12:57,366 --> 00:12:59,210 - How's your mom doing? - She's okay. 295 00:12:59,317 --> 00:13:00,352 And you? 296 00:13:00,835 --> 00:13:02,893 I feel like celebrating your birthday. 297 00:13:04,416 --> 00:13:06,661 Why are you working? It's your birthday. 298 00:13:06,696 --> 00:13:08,142 And I thought your deal was already closed. 299 00:13:08,175 --> 00:13:09,131 It is. 300 00:13:09,265 --> 00:13:11,800 Then all that's left to do is celebrate -- 301 00:13:11,835 --> 00:13:14,862 and tell your dad, because you said Hunzbergers celebrate achievement. 302 00:13:14,897 --> 00:13:17,141 Isn't closing this deal a pretty big achievement? 303 00:13:17,175 --> 00:13:18,861 I don't want to tell my dad -- not yet. 304 00:13:18,895 --> 00:13:20,601 He can read about it in the Wall Street journal, 305 00:13:20,635 --> 00:13:23,381 which in fact is what I just had sent to me -- the press release. 306 00:13:23,415 --> 00:13:25,531 The press release, huh? That's fancy. 307 00:13:25,567 --> 00:13:28,480 "Hunzberger, a young visionary entrepreneur." 308 00:13:28,648 --> 00:13:29,850 Does that sound dorky? 309 00:13:29,887 --> 00:13:31,971 Nope. Sounds great. It's exciting. 310 00:13:32,005 --> 00:13:33,642 - These are good, by the way. - Good. 311 00:13:33,677 --> 00:13:36,621 But what would be great with them is a nice bowl of peeled grapes. 312 00:13:36,657 --> 00:13:38,111 - Oh yeah? - Would you make peeled grapes? 313 00:13:38,147 --> 00:13:39,792 If they come in a tube, I do. 314 00:13:43,427 --> 00:13:44,141 Hello? 315 00:13:44,175 --> 00:13:45,263 - Lorelai? - Mom? 316 00:13:45,295 --> 00:13:47,113 - They won't deliver. - Deliver what? 317 00:13:47,148 --> 00:13:49,312 And, apparently, none of their help has driver's licenses. 318 00:13:49,347 --> 00:13:51,391 That's a little irresponsible, don't you think? 319 00:13:51,425 --> 00:13:53,411 You got to help me out a little here, mom. 320 00:13:54,205 --> 00:13:55,373 Why are you leering at me? 321 00:13:55,407 --> 00:13:57,160 Mother, are you on peyote? 322 00:13:57,198 --> 00:13:59,453 Mr. Gilmore's light bulb is bothering him. 323 00:13:59,485 --> 00:14:01,443 I'm sorry -- it's that some sort of nurse code? 324 00:14:01,476 --> 00:14:03,820 The 60-watt bulb on his bedside lamp 325 00:14:03,858 --> 00:14:06,910 is apparently casting a harsh glare on the television. 326 00:14:06,946 --> 00:14:08,572 Well, then, get him another light bulb. 327 00:14:08,606 --> 00:14:09,960 It's just not my job. 328 00:14:09,998 --> 00:14:12,541 - Then get Francette to do it. - I am Francette. 329 00:14:12,575 --> 00:14:14,341 - Mom. - Aurora is the maid. 330 00:14:14,375 --> 00:14:17,083 Then ask Aurora to find a light bulb. 331 00:14:17,115 --> 00:14:19,263 - I can't find Aurora. - You can't find Aurora? 332 00:14:19,298 --> 00:14:21,142 She's hiding from Mr. Gilmore. 333 00:14:21,177 --> 00:14:23,211 - Hello? - She's hiding from -- 334 00:14:23,246 --> 00:14:26,260 Never mind. I'll get it myself. Honestly -- these people! 335 00:14:26,296 --> 00:14:27,631 Mother, what is going on over there? 336 00:14:27,666 --> 00:14:30,003 Your father is running low on his blood thinners, 337 00:14:30,035 --> 00:14:32,141 and the pharmacy can't be bothered to deliver. 338 00:14:32,175 --> 00:14:35,290 Are you calling to ask me if I will pick up dad's prescription? 339 00:14:35,328 --> 00:14:37,922 Well, I can't leave the house, or chaos will ensue. 340 00:14:37,958 --> 00:14:39,940 You're calling to imply that you would like to ask me 341 00:14:39,976 --> 00:14:41,160 to pick up dad's prescription ? 342 00:14:41,196 --> 00:14:44,973 It's a pharmacy at the corner of Walden and Hasbrook lane. 343 00:14:45,428 --> 00:14:46,481 Okay-- 344 00:14:46,777 --> 00:14:47,813 Hello? 345 00:14:48,206 --> 00:14:50,982 No, it's no problem at all. I'd be happy to. 346 00:14:51,018 --> 00:14:52,422 It's just nice to be appreciated. 347 00:14:52,456 --> 00:14:54,593 By the way, Chris and I broke up. Bye. 348 00:14:57,946 --> 00:15:00,683 Yeah, it's true -- he's definitely moved out. 349 00:15:00,718 --> 00:15:04,031 Last time I saw the... beagle's car in the driveway, 350 00:15:04,065 --> 00:15:05,043 it was days ago. 351 00:15:05,076 --> 00:15:06,420 Then I saw the mover's truck, 352 00:15:06,456 --> 00:15:09,401 so only the... hen is living there now. 353 00:15:09,435 --> 00:15:12,190 Did the hen break up with the beagle, or the beagle with the hen? 354 00:15:12,225 --> 00:15:13,350 I don't know. 355 00:15:13,388 --> 00:15:14,600 The poor hen. 356 00:15:14,638 --> 00:15:16,383 She's been through so much. 357 00:15:16,415 --> 00:15:19,343 You know, just kind of getting used to him -- the beagle. 358 00:15:19,375 --> 00:15:21,612 But he's not right for her. He's a beagle, you know. 359 00:15:21,706 --> 00:15:24,102 And beagles belong with beagles. 360 00:15:24,136 --> 00:15:26,501 And the hen belongs with the rooster. 361 00:15:26,536 --> 00:15:27,391 Maybe. 362 00:15:27,426 --> 00:15:30,150 Well, does the rooster know about the hen and the beagle? 363 00:15:30,187 --> 00:15:33,441 Oh, yeah, east side Tillie was in here yesterday, blabbing her big mouth off. 364 00:15:33,475 --> 00:15:36,093 How did he take it? Did you see his face? 365 00:15:36,125 --> 00:15:37,821 Yeah, but you know the rooster. 366 00:15:37,857 --> 00:15:40,553 It's like looking at stonehenge. I don't know what he thinks. 367 00:15:40,587 --> 00:15:43,953 I hope he gets his act together because I think they're perfect. 368 00:15:43,988 --> 00:15:48,111 Yeah, but maybe sh-- the hen belongs with someone else... 369 00:15:48,348 --> 00:15:50,560 like a penguin or an ostrich. 370 00:15:50,597 --> 00:15:52,912 I can no longer sit here and listen to this. 371 00:15:52,945 --> 00:15:54,511 Oh, good. Go sit over there. 372 00:15:54,546 --> 00:15:58,890 I'm sorry, but I can't in good conscience let this perverse conversation continue. 373 00:15:58,927 --> 00:16:02,082 Are you insinuating that a hen could mate with an ostrich? 374 00:16:02,117 --> 00:16:05,361 Because even ignoring the question of biological feasibility, 375 00:16:05,395 --> 00:16:07,633 it's completely morally reprehensible. 376 00:16:07,668 --> 00:16:10,051 Oh, buzz off with your "morally reprehensible." 377 00:16:10,087 --> 00:16:11,861 How do you expect her to lay those eggs? 378 00:16:11,897 --> 00:16:13,593 Have you thought about that, have you? 379 00:16:14,157 --> 00:16:16,992 - Hey, big brother! - Surprise! 380 00:16:17,025 --> 00:16:20,853 Yes, Liz, T.J., jeez, and piles of your belongings. 381 00:16:20,887 --> 00:16:22,473 It's so good to see you. 382 00:16:22,505 --> 00:16:24,273 Yeah, you, too. Hey, Doula. 383 00:16:24,305 --> 00:16:25,771 - She looks good, huh? - Yeah. 384 00:16:25,807 --> 00:16:28,683 Sturdy, too, like she might be a female wrestler. 385 00:16:28,717 --> 00:16:30,131 - Oh, fingers crossed. - Right. 386 00:16:30,166 --> 00:16:32,230 You know what I'm thinking? Free tickets. 387 00:16:32,266 --> 00:16:34,760 So you two just decided to swing by the diner 388 00:16:34,796 --> 00:16:38,592 with a half a dozen bags and a baby apparatus of some kind? 389 00:16:38,625 --> 00:16:41,360 No, we decided to come and keep you company. 390 00:16:41,398 --> 00:16:42,362 - Company? - Yeah. 391 00:16:42,397 --> 00:16:44,493 Now that April's in New Mexico, we figured 392 00:16:44,525 --> 00:16:46,451 you might be getting a little lonely. 393 00:16:46,487 --> 00:16:47,961 No, I'm not getting lonely. 394 00:16:47,996 --> 00:16:50,542 I miss having April around, sure, 395 00:16:50,577 --> 00:16:52,880 but I talk to her every wednesday after swim practice 396 00:16:52,915 --> 00:16:55,021 and every sunday if she's done all her homework. 397 00:16:55,055 --> 00:16:56,461 It's going good. 398 00:16:56,495 --> 00:16:58,701 Are you buying this? I'm not buying it. 399 00:16:58,737 --> 00:17:00,310 Buying what? There's nothing to buy. 400 00:17:00,345 --> 00:17:01,913 Hey, where are you going? 401 00:17:01,946 --> 00:17:04,300 Oh, don't do the stiff-upper-lip thing with us. 402 00:17:04,336 --> 00:17:06,311 We're family. We're here for you. 403 00:17:06,348 --> 00:17:10,181 Look, Liz, it's really sweet of you to come by and visit, but -- 404 00:17:11,516 --> 00:17:13,432 You're planning on staying here for a while? 405 00:17:13,468 --> 00:17:14,700 We don't want you to be lonely. 406 00:17:14,728 --> 00:17:17,420 How long exactly are you planning on keeping me company? 407 00:17:17,456 --> 00:17:19,212 A few days, a week tops. 408 00:17:19,248 --> 00:17:20,960 I don't need to be kept company. 409 00:17:21,497 --> 00:17:23,291 Yeah, but you -- 410 00:17:24,308 --> 00:17:25,471 We should just come clean. 411 00:17:25,508 --> 00:17:26,922 - No. - Yes. About what? 412 00:17:26,955 --> 00:17:28,153 - About nothing. - T.J. 413 00:17:28,187 --> 00:17:30,893 How about them celtics, huh? They sure can dribble a basketball. 414 00:17:30,927 --> 00:17:32,271 - Liz... - We got moths. 415 00:17:32,307 --> 00:17:34,331 - I'm sorry? - Oh, me too, believe me. 416 00:17:34,366 --> 00:17:37,613 Luke, it's horrible. I hate those little floppy, fluttery jerks. 417 00:17:37,648 --> 00:17:38,820 Moths, huh? 418 00:17:38,856 --> 00:17:42,103 Dude, they're everywhere -- flying around, popping out of the flour container, 419 00:17:42,135 --> 00:17:45,703 congregating around the light bulbs, all pasty and white. 420 00:17:45,736 --> 00:17:48,160 I swear, moths are like the loser butterflies 421 00:17:48,196 --> 00:17:50,862 that couldn't get laid if they tied a $100 bill to their -- 422 00:17:50,897 --> 00:17:52,503 T.J., I got it. You got moths. 423 00:17:52,536 --> 00:17:55,002 So we figured we could avoid the moths 424 00:17:55,036 --> 00:17:57,770 and have a little quality time with you. 425 00:17:57,806 --> 00:18:02,700 Yeah, all right, just go ahead upstairs, make yourselves at home. 426 00:18:02,735 --> 00:18:03,752 Love it! 427 00:18:13,815 --> 00:18:16,170 It's miso, Richard. It's good for you. 428 00:18:16,205 --> 00:18:17,260 Soup. 429 00:18:17,827 --> 00:18:20,022 Stefan! Stefan! 430 00:18:20,058 --> 00:18:22,891 Soup is not a meal, nor is a salad. 431 00:18:22,927 --> 00:18:26,322 Soup and salad are either precursors to a meal or addenda. 432 00:18:26,357 --> 00:18:27,730 Richard, please. 433 00:18:27,937 --> 00:18:29,831 Soup and salad is not a meal. 434 00:18:29,867 --> 00:18:31,783 We have salmon if you want salmon. 435 00:18:31,817 --> 00:18:34,471 I don't want salmon. For heaven's sakes, I don't want salmon. 436 00:18:34,506 --> 00:18:37,203 What I would like is a proper meal. 437 00:18:37,737 --> 00:18:39,501 Aurora, the door! 438 00:18:39,537 --> 00:18:42,200 I was given certain dietary parameters. 439 00:18:42,238 --> 00:18:43,780 I know that. I'm not stupid. 440 00:18:43,816 --> 00:18:45,780 I know what the situation is here. 441 00:18:46,245 --> 00:18:48,432 - I just don't know -- - Francette, Aurora, 442 00:18:48,468 --> 00:18:51,441 either of you, both of you, will someone answer the door?! 443 00:18:51,478 --> 00:18:54,002 I'm sure Stefan is interested in your input, Richard. 444 00:18:54,037 --> 00:18:56,582 Here's my input -- this food is inedible. 445 00:18:57,187 --> 00:19:00,500 Fine, I'll get it myself, not that it's my job. 446 00:19:01,547 --> 00:19:04,782 A suggestion -- maybe you would prefer some light sandwiches. 447 00:19:04,817 --> 00:19:06,012 Sandwiches?! 448 00:19:06,396 --> 00:19:07,901 Hi. I come bearing drugs. 449 00:19:07,938 --> 00:19:08,930 Please don't bellow that. 450 00:19:08,947 --> 00:19:10,163 Bellow what -- "drugs"?! 451 00:19:10,197 --> 00:19:11,853 - Lorelai. - How's dad doing? 452 00:19:11,885 --> 00:19:12,931 He's just fine. 453 00:19:12,968 --> 00:19:15,710 I swear you can get better food in an airplane. 454 00:19:15,747 --> 00:19:17,231 I haven't been in a submarine, 455 00:19:17,268 --> 00:19:19,470 but I'll wager the food is better there, too. 456 00:19:19,615 --> 00:19:20,992 It's an adjustment. 457 00:19:21,737 --> 00:19:23,682 Let me offer one more suggestion. 458 00:19:23,717 --> 00:19:24,871 What -- tacos? 459 00:19:24,907 --> 00:19:26,231 No. I quit! 460 00:19:26,266 --> 00:19:28,253 - Fine. - Stefan, no! 461 00:19:28,507 --> 00:19:30,001 I'll tell you something. 462 00:19:30,036 --> 00:19:32,563 I have worked in so many four-star restaurants, 463 00:19:32,597 --> 00:19:34,562 I could have my own constellation. 464 00:19:34,598 --> 00:19:36,681 And yet, I'm treated like this?! 465 00:19:36,716 --> 00:19:39,641 I'm sorry, but I have too much self-respect 466 00:19:39,676 --> 00:19:41,772 to work for this... terror! 467 00:19:46,538 --> 00:19:47,963 How are things going around here? 468 00:19:47,998 --> 00:19:49,110 - Fine. - Fine. 469 00:19:49,148 --> 00:19:50,342 Feeling okay, dad? 470 00:19:50,376 --> 00:19:51,441 I'm fine. 471 00:19:51,476 --> 00:19:52,822 Now, if you'll excuse me, 472 00:19:52,856 --> 00:19:56,063 I think I'm going to go watch Bob Tway vanquish Greg Norman 473 00:19:56,098 --> 00:19:57,992 in the '86 PGA championship. 474 00:19:58,025 --> 00:20:00,822 Before you go, did you managed to call Rob Mandel's office? 475 00:20:00,857 --> 00:20:01,592 No. 476 00:20:01,627 --> 00:20:03,722 But Angelique called three times this morning. 477 00:20:03,757 --> 00:20:06,242 Bully for her. I'm sorry. I have golf to watch. 478 00:20:06,277 --> 00:20:08,201 But, Richard, you didn't eat a thing. 479 00:20:08,727 --> 00:20:09,900 He didn't eat a thing. 480 00:20:09,935 --> 00:20:11,212 Mom, send something up to him. 481 00:20:11,246 --> 00:20:13,440 Send what? You saw yourself -- Stefan just quit. 482 00:20:13,475 --> 00:20:14,751 You could make him something. 483 00:20:14,788 --> 00:20:17,311 I mean, the maid could -- what is her name? 484 00:20:17,348 --> 00:20:20,250 Oh, I don't know. Aurora, I think. I don't know. 485 00:20:20,287 --> 00:20:22,323 Anyway, she's hiding, apparently. 486 00:20:22,397 --> 00:20:23,820 Aurora? 487 00:20:24,328 --> 00:20:26,931 Aurora? Where are you? 488 00:20:26,967 --> 00:20:28,281 The maid is hiding? 489 00:20:28,315 --> 00:20:30,430 According to the nurse, but she's useless 490 00:20:30,466 --> 00:20:32,920 because she won't do anything that doesn't involve a stethoscope. 491 00:20:32,956 --> 00:20:34,782 - I can make something for dad. - Oh, please. 492 00:20:34,815 --> 00:20:36,941 I can make toast, if the conditions are ideal. 493 00:20:36,977 --> 00:20:38,952 He won't eat it, anyway. He'll just snap at me, 494 00:20:38,987 --> 00:20:40,512 snapping at everyone in sight. 495 00:20:40,545 --> 00:20:43,563 The poor maid quivers every time he comes near her. She just quivers. 496 00:20:43,597 --> 00:20:44,651 It's terrible. 497 00:20:44,688 --> 00:20:46,803 And his accountant's office keeps calling because he's supposed 498 00:20:46,836 --> 00:20:49,960 to be filing an 1120. Who knows what an 1120 is? 499 00:20:49,997 --> 00:20:51,652 I do. It's a federal tax form. 500 00:20:51,687 --> 00:20:53,071 Aurora! 501 00:20:53,366 --> 00:20:55,802 He won't call them back. All he wants to do is watch golf. 502 00:20:55,837 --> 00:20:57,683 - What's with all the golf? - I have no idea. 503 00:20:57,715 --> 00:21:00,431 He just lies there in bed, staring at the TV like a zombie. 504 00:21:00,468 --> 00:21:02,252 Everything is falling apart. Everything is chaotic. 505 00:21:02,288 --> 00:21:07,323 Mom, please, sit down. I'm gonna make you a delicious mocktail, huh? 506 00:21:07,357 --> 00:21:10,213 And then you enjoy that and relax 507 00:21:10,247 --> 00:21:13,612 and I'll take care of the chef and I'll make sure that dad takes his medicine 508 00:21:13,648 --> 00:21:15,361 so you don't have to worry. Here. 509 00:21:15,397 --> 00:21:19,521 Thank you. But I'm going to call Angelique and ask about this 1120. 510 00:21:20,736 --> 00:21:22,233 I'll find Aurora. 511 00:21:22,908 --> 00:21:24,600 Aurora! 512 00:21:25,307 --> 00:21:28,163 To heat most of these up, you just zap them for a couple minutes. 513 00:21:28,215 --> 00:21:31,761 Don't worry. Each meal has a note with cooking instructions taped to it. 514 00:21:31,796 --> 00:21:33,341 Did I already tell you you're a goddess? 515 00:21:33,377 --> 00:21:35,452 You might have mentioned something to that effect. 516 00:21:35,488 --> 00:21:36,760 Could I be the one with the multiarms? 517 00:21:36,797 --> 00:21:37,513 The who? 518 00:21:37,546 --> 00:21:39,291 The goddess with all these arms. I want to be her. 519 00:21:39,328 --> 00:21:40,932 Sure. Hey, these look good. 520 00:21:40,967 --> 00:21:42,731 Don't sound so surprised. 521 00:21:42,766 --> 00:21:45,262 Yeah, but they're supposed to be healthy, right? They are all healthy? 522 00:21:45,296 --> 00:21:46,953 They're ridiculously healthy. 523 00:21:47,285 --> 00:21:48,761 - Hey! - Hey. 524 00:21:48,795 --> 00:21:50,473 What did we do for my 8th birthday? 525 00:21:50,508 --> 00:21:53,570 I don't know. Is this a quiz? Are you on some sort of radio contest? 526 00:21:53,606 --> 00:21:55,620 For Logan's birthday, I'm trying to put together 527 00:21:55,658 --> 00:21:57,910 a night of all the birthday highlights that he missed. 528 00:21:57,947 --> 00:21:59,700 And you're looking for the classics? 529 00:21:59,735 --> 00:22:00,732 Exactly. 530 00:22:00,766 --> 00:22:04,113 I remember that we had an outer-space birthday when I turned 6. 531 00:22:04,147 --> 00:22:06,760 Right. We made space suits out of garbage bags. 532 00:22:06,796 --> 00:22:08,642 We had tang and freeze-dried ice cream. 533 00:22:08,677 --> 00:22:11,822 And then when I turned 7, we did a fiesta birthday. 534 00:22:11,976 --> 00:22:14,400 Piñatas and tacos and freeze-dried ice cream. 535 00:22:14,435 --> 00:22:16,072 Freeze-dried ice cream is the best. 536 00:22:16,107 --> 00:22:19,172 I remember enjoying my 8th birthday. I just don't remember what it was. 537 00:22:19,207 --> 00:22:21,693 - Teddy-bear tea party. - Oh, that's right. 538 00:22:21,728 --> 00:22:23,360 - So, how's it going over there? - I'd say weirder. 539 00:22:23,396 --> 00:22:25,443 Your grandma's a little on edge. 540 00:22:27,257 --> 00:22:29,800 Oh, hey, mom, it's Logan on the other line. Can you hold on a sec? 541 00:22:29,836 --> 00:22:31,082 Tell him "happy birthday" for me. 542 00:22:31,116 --> 00:22:32,163 Will do. 543 00:22:32,687 --> 00:22:34,693 - Happy birthday. - Thank you. 544 00:22:34,728 --> 00:22:36,142 And happy birthday from my mom. 545 00:22:36,176 --> 00:22:37,202 Thank you. 546 00:22:37,238 --> 00:22:38,781 Hey, so my dad just called. 547 00:22:38,816 --> 00:22:39,703 Oh, he did? 548 00:22:39,737 --> 00:22:41,552 Yeah. Apparently, he remembered my birthday, 549 00:22:41,585 --> 00:22:43,752 and he said he wants to take us out to dinner, you and me. 550 00:22:43,788 --> 00:22:45,603 Oh. That's... great. 551 00:22:45,636 --> 00:22:49,572 I know it's last minute, and I know you got your special Gilmore hoopla planned, 552 00:22:49,606 --> 00:22:50,992 so we don't have to go if you don't want to go. 553 00:22:51,025 --> 00:22:53,840 No, we should go. We can always do the Gilmore hoopla 554 00:22:53,875 --> 00:22:55,202 after we have dinner with your dad. 555 00:22:55,236 --> 00:22:57,060 Are you sure? It'll probably be lame. For all I know, 556 00:22:57,098 --> 00:22:59,040 he's invited us to crash a meeting with Rupert Murdoch. 557 00:22:59,078 --> 00:23:01,203 That's cool. I can hang with mad dog Murdoch. 558 00:23:01,236 --> 00:23:04,043 Okay. Well, cool, cool. Thanks, Ace. I'll call him back. 559 00:23:04,078 --> 00:23:05,782 - Happy birthday! - Bye! 560 00:23:06,796 --> 00:23:08,072 Hey, sorry about that. 561 00:23:08,106 --> 00:23:10,991 - How's the birthday boy? - He's good. He's fine. 562 00:23:11,027 --> 00:23:13,450 But I guess his dad called and wants to take us out 563 00:23:13,485 --> 00:23:14,852 to a birthday dinner tonight. 564 00:23:14,886 --> 00:23:16,550 That sounds like a load of laughs. 565 00:23:16,586 --> 00:23:19,992 Yeah. Mitchum -- that man is fundamentally incapable 566 00:23:20,028 --> 00:23:23,031 of making me feel anything but small and awful. 567 00:23:23,066 --> 00:23:25,581 That's not true. He's made you feel incompetent, too. 568 00:23:25,615 --> 00:23:28,331 I guess Logan was excited that his dad wanted to take us out, 569 00:23:28,366 --> 00:23:29,583 so that's sweet. 570 00:23:30,005 --> 00:23:33,292 Have you told grandma and grandpa about you and dad yet? 571 00:23:33,327 --> 00:23:34,672 Um, not yet. 572 00:23:34,707 --> 00:23:38,590 I feel obligated to remind you that the lives of 400 cornish game hens 573 00:23:38,625 --> 00:23:39,632 hang in the balance. 574 00:23:39,668 --> 00:23:40,802 Happy Logan's birthday. 575 00:23:40,837 --> 00:23:42,111 Happy Logan's birthday to you. 576 00:23:42,145 --> 00:23:43,191 Bye. 577 00:23:43,228 --> 00:23:45,423 Mmm, that looks unhealthy. 578 00:23:45,457 --> 00:23:46,930 Thank you. 579 00:23:48,996 --> 00:23:50,811 Oh, I love this song. 580 00:23:50,846 --> 00:23:53,040 I don't know why we didn't think of this before. 581 00:23:53,075 --> 00:23:53,830 Think of what? 582 00:23:53,865 --> 00:23:57,472 Using your fishing line for stringing -- it's really incredible. 583 00:23:57,508 --> 00:23:59,803 Durable yet plenty thin and flexible. 584 00:23:59,838 --> 00:24:00,611 I'm glad. 585 00:24:00,647 --> 00:24:03,363 And some of this doohickeys, man, are really cute. 586 00:24:03,397 --> 00:24:05,211 Check it out -- sexy, yeah? 587 00:24:05,248 --> 00:24:07,623 Oh, wow, babe, these are gorgeous. 588 00:24:07,658 --> 00:24:08,502 Thank you, sweetie. 589 00:24:08,538 --> 00:24:10,582 I'm so proud of your sister, Luke. 590 00:24:10,615 --> 00:24:13,141 This jewelry stuff has really taken off, you know? 591 00:24:13,178 --> 00:24:16,101 And it's great because now I can be the stay-at-home dad 592 00:24:16,136 --> 00:24:17,620 I've always dreamed of being 593 00:24:17,658 --> 00:24:20,190 while this one goes out and brings home the bacon. 594 00:24:20,225 --> 00:24:22,290 We're gonna drive our new van from trade show 595 00:24:22,327 --> 00:24:23,961 to trade show, selling the jewelry. 596 00:24:23,998 --> 00:24:26,822 In a couple weeks, there's this big show in Manhattan. 597 00:24:26,856 --> 00:24:28,052 - Oh yeah? - Yeah. 598 00:24:28,087 --> 00:24:29,370 At the Javits Center. 599 00:24:29,406 --> 00:24:31,480 We'll just load up the van, head up 91, 600 00:24:31,518 --> 00:24:33,661 and start showing off the family jewels. 601 00:24:33,695 --> 00:24:36,880 That sounds good. I wouldn't take the 91 through New Haven. 602 00:24:36,915 --> 00:24:39,122 There's tons of construction there now. I'd take the Merritt. 603 00:24:39,158 --> 00:24:40,641 How do you know there's construction? 604 00:24:40,677 --> 00:24:43,790 'Cause I went there to visit Lorelai's dad when he had the heart attack. 605 00:24:43,825 --> 00:24:46,530 - You did? - I thought I told you that. 606 00:24:46,568 --> 00:24:48,443 No, you told me he had a heart attack. 607 00:24:48,475 --> 00:24:50,863 You didn't tell me you went to the hospital. 608 00:24:50,895 --> 00:24:52,472 What's the big deal? 609 00:24:52,965 --> 00:24:56,620 I don't know. I mean, you went there for Lorelai, 610 00:24:56,657 --> 00:24:58,472 and what's going on with her and her husband? 611 00:24:58,507 --> 00:25:01,513 I don't know. They split up or something. 612 00:25:01,548 --> 00:25:02,543 They did? 613 00:25:02,578 --> 00:25:04,553 Yeah, well, a week or so ago. 614 00:25:04,676 --> 00:25:06,580 Well, well, well. 615 00:25:07,017 --> 00:25:09,000 - What? - The plot thickens. 616 00:25:09,038 --> 00:25:11,553 The plot does not thicken, okay? 617 00:25:11,585 --> 00:25:13,462 We're friends -- that's all. 618 00:25:13,497 --> 00:25:15,983 I just went out when I heard her dad was sick. That's it. 619 00:25:16,016 --> 00:25:18,500 - That is a relief. - T.J.! 620 00:25:18,536 --> 00:25:20,832 What? It's a load off my mind. That's all I'm saying. 621 00:25:20,866 --> 00:25:23,183 'Cause I don't think you should get back together with her. 622 00:25:23,216 --> 00:25:25,343 Nobody's talking about getting back together with her. 623 00:25:25,376 --> 00:25:27,782 Good. 'Cause that woman is drama. Every time you mention her, 624 00:25:27,816 --> 00:25:29,533 it's got something to do with the hospital. 625 00:25:29,568 --> 00:25:31,483 - What? - How's her dad doing? 626 00:25:31,518 --> 00:25:32,722 Good, I guess. 627 00:25:32,757 --> 00:25:34,332 You haven't called Lorelai? 628 00:25:34,367 --> 00:25:35,203 No. 629 00:25:35,235 --> 00:25:38,093 Don't call her. Don't open that Pandora's box. 630 00:25:38,128 --> 00:25:40,990 If he wants to call her, he should call her -- they're friends. 631 00:25:41,027 --> 00:25:42,672 Just lock it up, Luke. 632 00:25:42,707 --> 00:25:43,800 Lock it up. 633 00:25:43,837 --> 00:25:46,182 Solder that baby shut. 634 00:25:47,847 --> 00:25:49,143 Would you follow me, please? 635 00:25:49,176 --> 00:25:51,230 Mr. Hunzberger is already at the table. 636 00:25:51,267 --> 00:25:52,903 "Mr. Hunzberger is already at the table." 637 00:25:52,935 --> 00:25:54,110 I told you. 638 00:25:54,365 --> 00:25:55,663 There they are. 639 00:25:55,695 --> 00:25:56,930 Happy birthday, Logan. 640 00:25:56,965 --> 00:25:58,483 - Rory. - Hi. 641 00:25:58,515 --> 00:26:00,102 - Great to see you. - You too. 642 00:26:00,138 --> 00:26:01,282 Sit, sit. 643 00:26:01,347 --> 00:26:04,022 I took the liberty of ordering a bottle of champagne for the table. 644 00:26:04,036 --> 00:26:04,990 Oh, nice. 645 00:26:05,025 --> 00:26:06,030 Rory, how does that sound? 646 00:26:06,068 --> 00:26:07,591 Sounds like music to my ears. 647 00:26:07,627 --> 00:26:08,730 Good, good. 648 00:26:08,766 --> 00:26:10,683 So, you look pretty good. 649 00:26:10,716 --> 00:26:12,392 You been hitting the squash courts lately? 650 00:26:12,415 --> 00:26:15,151 I wish. I haven't had much of a chance. I've been working pretty much nonstop 651 00:26:15,186 --> 00:26:16,550 - these days. - He has been. 652 00:26:16,585 --> 00:26:17,630 Well, good for you. 653 00:26:17,667 --> 00:26:19,423 A little hard work never hurt anybody. 654 00:26:20,558 --> 00:26:23,922 To my son -- now a quarter of a century old. 655 00:26:23,956 --> 00:26:26,302 Not bad. And to his lovely girlfriend -- 656 00:26:26,335 --> 00:26:28,801 the beautiful and always witty Rory. 657 00:26:28,835 --> 00:26:30,113 Hear, hear. 658 00:26:32,455 --> 00:26:35,470 Here's a little amuse-bouche with avocado and crabmeat, 659 00:26:35,508 --> 00:26:36,781 compliments of the chef. 660 00:26:36,816 --> 00:26:38,391 Oh, tell Markham thanks. 661 00:26:38,428 --> 00:26:39,782 You know the chef here? 662 00:26:39,816 --> 00:26:41,400 Yeah, I've known him for... 663 00:26:41,438 --> 00:26:44,353 wow... almost 15 years now. 664 00:26:44,618 --> 00:26:46,290 Interesting story, actually -- 665 00:26:46,328 --> 00:26:49,731 he was the sous chef at Le Bernardin for a bunch of years. 666 00:26:51,775 --> 00:26:53,702 Mmm... that's good. 667 00:26:53,847 --> 00:26:55,082 That's good crab. 668 00:26:55,118 --> 00:26:57,720 Anyway, one day, he just quit -- 669 00:26:57,757 --> 00:26:59,211 said he wanted to start his own restaurant. 670 00:26:59,247 --> 00:27:00,861 Everyone thought it was a bad idea at the time. 671 00:27:00,897 --> 00:27:01,981 The odds were against him. 672 00:27:02,016 --> 00:27:04,462 Opening a successful restaurant in Manhattan 673 00:27:04,648 --> 00:27:07,030 is like catching a firefly in your hand, 674 00:27:07,067 --> 00:27:08,602 only a hell of a lot more expensive. 675 00:27:08,635 --> 00:27:10,790 All I can tell you is that this amuse-bouche is great. 676 00:27:10,797 --> 00:27:12,670 Yes, my mouth is very amused. 677 00:27:13,566 --> 00:27:14,640 That's funny. 678 00:27:14,885 --> 00:27:16,583 But it was a very gutsy move. 679 00:27:16,618 --> 00:27:17,641 And it paid off. 680 00:27:17,678 --> 00:27:18,882 He caught that firefly. 681 00:27:18,917 --> 00:27:20,023 Exactly. 682 00:27:20,056 --> 00:27:23,652 So, Rory, tell me -- are you still planning to pursue journalism? 683 00:27:23,687 --> 00:27:28,501 Yes, I have been writing some articles for an online magazine 684 00:27:28,535 --> 00:27:32,350 and I've just applied for the James Reston reporting fellowship. 685 00:27:32,387 --> 00:27:33,611 You know what you should read? 686 00:27:33,646 --> 00:27:35,880 - Philip Meyer's latest book -- - "The vanishing newspaper." 687 00:27:35,915 --> 00:27:37,180 I read it. I loved it. 688 00:27:37,217 --> 00:27:38,981 It's an interesting time in journalism. 689 00:27:39,017 --> 00:27:40,852 I'll tell you what our field needs -- 690 00:27:41,025 --> 00:27:44,160 an infusion of bright, talented people like you, Rory. 691 00:27:44,197 --> 00:27:45,803 - Thank you. - I mean it. 692 00:27:47,536 --> 00:27:50,023 So, dad took his medicine. He ate half of Sookie's chicken 693 00:27:50,058 --> 00:27:52,370 and the entire mango smoothie. I got three recommendations 694 00:27:52,397 --> 00:27:55,651 of personal chefs from Sookie, two of them I've spoken to on the phone. 695 00:27:56,016 --> 00:27:57,702 Thank you. Why are you doing all this? 696 00:27:57,736 --> 00:27:59,740 I'm trying to help, mom. I don't want you to be so stressed. 697 00:27:59,776 --> 00:28:02,731 But I am. I'm so stressed. I can't find anything. 698 00:28:02,768 --> 00:28:03,762 What are you looking for? 699 00:28:03,777 --> 00:28:06,503 Your father's accountant wants all sorts of information 700 00:28:06,536 --> 00:28:09,363 so he can file these taxes, which are apparently due in february. 701 00:28:09,397 --> 00:28:11,512 - Maybe I can help. - How can you help? 702 00:28:11,648 --> 00:28:14,421 Mom, I have a business. I helped dad set up this business. 703 00:28:14,458 --> 00:28:15,862 I went to business school. 704 00:28:15,897 --> 00:28:17,051 Let me see that. 705 00:28:17,496 --> 00:28:18,683 What are you doing? 706 00:28:18,717 --> 00:28:20,911 Don't touch the computer. You could mess something up. 707 00:28:20,945 --> 00:28:22,880 Don't worry, mom. I know what I'm doing. 708 00:28:22,917 --> 00:28:26,780 Okay, so he's using Quicken. A profit and loss statement, 709 00:28:26,817 --> 00:28:29,501 a balance sheet, a schedule asset, are all things I can pull up here. 710 00:28:29,536 --> 00:28:31,851 We can just e-mail them to the accountant for the 1120. 711 00:28:31,888 --> 00:28:33,420 How do you know about 1120s? 712 00:28:33,458 --> 00:28:35,151 I have to file them for the Inn. 713 00:28:35,186 --> 00:28:37,102 The Inn's a corporation just like dad's company. 714 00:28:37,137 --> 00:28:38,861 Why is everything a corporation? 715 00:28:38,898 --> 00:28:41,781 We incorporated so we were protected from personal liability. 716 00:28:41,815 --> 00:28:44,591 If someone was allergic to pillow mints and wanted to sue me 717 00:28:44,626 --> 00:28:46,892 for a million dollars, I wouldn't have to pay for it out of my own pocket. 718 00:28:46,928 --> 00:28:49,182 Your father and I don't have anyone who wants to sue us. 719 00:28:49,218 --> 00:28:51,382 Well, dad probably did it for tax purposes. 720 00:28:51,416 --> 00:28:54,531 It looks like he's got a couple of different investments, 721 00:28:54,565 --> 00:28:56,270 some stocks, a rental building. 722 00:28:56,815 --> 00:28:58,161 Would you like a drink? 723 00:28:58,347 --> 00:29:01,123 Mmm, I thought the house was dry. 724 00:29:01,775 --> 00:29:02,783 Vodka or scotch? 725 00:29:02,816 --> 00:29:04,630 Wow, it's a regular speakeasy. 726 00:29:04,667 --> 00:29:06,083 Would you like a drink or not? 727 00:29:06,116 --> 00:29:07,063 Vodka, please. 728 00:29:07,098 --> 00:29:08,623 I have glasses. 729 00:29:10,158 --> 00:29:11,683 Serve yourself. 730 00:29:12,468 --> 00:29:14,342 Just because your father can't drink 731 00:29:14,375 --> 00:29:16,310 doesn't mean the rest of us should suffer. 732 00:29:18,175 --> 00:29:19,262 Cheers. 733 00:29:22,986 --> 00:29:25,193 Ah! That's better. 734 00:29:26,407 --> 00:29:28,341 Mom, Christopher and I split up. 735 00:29:32,097 --> 00:29:33,091 Okay. 736 00:29:36,468 --> 00:29:39,622 - I hardly know what to say. - Really? That's great. 737 00:29:39,656 --> 00:29:42,221 You don't have to say anything at all -- now or ever. 738 00:29:44,915 --> 00:29:46,331 What's a windmill park? 739 00:29:46,365 --> 00:29:50,792 Uh, it looks like dad owns a couple of windmills in Palm Springs. 740 00:29:50,827 --> 00:29:52,181 We own windmills? 741 00:29:52,218 --> 00:29:53,842 They're energy generators. 742 00:29:54,336 --> 00:29:56,683 I had no idea we owned windmills. 743 00:30:00,445 --> 00:30:01,491 That lamb is terrific. 744 00:30:01,528 --> 00:30:03,243 My compliments to the your friend, the chef. 745 00:30:03,277 --> 00:30:06,122 Well, you're a good orderer. He's always been a good orderer. 746 00:30:06,158 --> 00:30:09,021 Even when he was 8 years old, he's always ordered well. 747 00:30:09,057 --> 00:30:11,003 - It's a good skill to have. - It is, it is. 748 00:30:11,037 --> 00:30:13,082 And you know what I should do? I should just order whatever you're ordering, 749 00:30:13,117 --> 00:30:15,061 - no matter what it is. - Brains it is, 750 00:30:15,097 --> 00:30:17,622 followed by sweetbreads and some rocky mountain oysters. 751 00:30:17,708 --> 00:30:19,953 Oh, this is a business thing, if you guys don't mind. 752 00:30:19,986 --> 00:30:21,142 Hunzberger here. 753 00:30:21,177 --> 00:30:22,631 No, I haven't talked to him yet. 754 00:30:22,667 --> 00:30:24,043 "Hunzberger here." 755 00:30:24,077 --> 00:30:26,163 Last year, if he got a call interrupting dinner, 756 00:30:26,196 --> 00:30:28,352 it would be an invitation to go drink expensive liquor 757 00:30:28,386 --> 00:30:30,302 and pull some ridiculous prank. 758 00:30:30,436 --> 00:30:31,622 He's growing up. 759 00:30:31,656 --> 00:30:33,062 Yeah, he's doing really great. 760 00:30:33,097 --> 00:30:35,350 He is, and it's because of you. 761 00:30:35,485 --> 00:30:37,400 Oh, I don't know about that. 762 00:30:37,438 --> 00:30:39,831 No, I know you encouraged him to go to London. 763 00:30:39,868 --> 00:30:43,400 I know you used your influence in a positive way, and Logan's mother and I... 764 00:30:43,436 --> 00:30:44,582 really appreciate it. 765 00:30:44,618 --> 00:30:48,293 Well, I think Logan deserves all the credit for what he's done. 766 00:30:48,325 --> 00:30:50,303 No, you're too modest, Rory. 767 00:30:50,336 --> 00:30:52,913 You've been a real asset to Logan and to our family. 768 00:30:52,945 --> 00:30:55,010 Oh, well... thanks. 769 00:30:55,048 --> 00:30:57,661 I know we've had our differences in the past. 770 00:30:57,808 --> 00:30:58,392 Yeah. 771 00:30:58,426 --> 00:31:02,821 But I'm glad to know that we're now clearly on the same page. 772 00:31:03,457 --> 00:31:06,361 Okay, yeah. Good. 773 00:31:06,567 --> 00:31:08,103 To being on the same page? 774 00:31:08,135 --> 00:31:10,050 To being on the same page. 775 00:31:14,537 --> 00:31:17,193 I am really glad we got the chance to talk tonight. 776 00:31:17,225 --> 00:31:19,253 In part, because we still have more work to do. 777 00:31:19,288 --> 00:31:20,201 What work? 778 00:31:20,237 --> 00:31:22,812 We have to figure out what his next step should be. 779 00:31:23,065 --> 00:31:25,461 Uh, well, shouldn't he be figuring that out? 780 00:31:25,495 --> 00:31:26,892 Well, you're part of the team here. 781 00:31:26,905 --> 00:31:28,830 Of course, we're gonna take care of you, too. 782 00:31:28,886 --> 00:31:29,841 What do you mean? 783 00:31:29,876 --> 00:31:31,793 We have newspapers all around the world. 784 00:31:31,826 --> 00:31:33,211 You can take your pick. 785 00:31:33,245 --> 00:31:34,482 My pick? 786 00:31:35,415 --> 00:31:40,191 Um, I seem to remember you saying that I didn't have it. 787 00:31:40,225 --> 00:31:42,290 Oh, please. Things change. 788 00:31:42,807 --> 00:31:44,272 Circumstances change. 789 00:31:44,307 --> 00:31:46,142 Sorry that took so long. Have you ever noticed 790 00:31:46,166 --> 00:31:47,931 that people in Hong Kong are really chatty? 791 00:31:47,965 --> 00:31:48,982 I haven't. 792 00:31:49,018 --> 00:31:51,890 You know what? That's true. I know a guy from Kowloon, and, man, 793 00:31:51,927 --> 00:31:54,363 is he a loquacious son of a bitch. Oh, here we go. 794 00:31:54,397 --> 00:31:56,113 Apricot and walnut varénikis 795 00:31:56,148 --> 00:31:58,072 drizzled with a raspberry reduction. 796 00:31:58,105 --> 00:32:00,612 I told them to make something special for your birthday. 797 00:32:00,647 --> 00:32:01,790 Thanks. It looks great. 798 00:32:01,828 --> 00:32:03,092 Happy birthday. 799 00:32:03,155 --> 00:32:04,513 Make a wish. 800 00:32:05,406 --> 00:32:06,823 There we go. 801 00:32:10,628 --> 00:32:13,103 Hey. It's your turn. 802 00:32:13,138 --> 00:32:16,581 Hey, aren't we supposed to let her just cry to toughen her up and whatnot? 803 00:32:16,615 --> 00:32:18,722 Isn't that the latest parenting theory? 804 00:32:18,758 --> 00:32:21,140 You only believe in that theory when it's your turn. 805 00:32:21,178 --> 00:32:22,530 All right, all right. 806 00:32:22,935 --> 00:32:25,030 I just don't want her getting too soft. 807 00:32:25,066 --> 00:32:27,210 She's got a wrestling future to think of. 808 00:32:27,376 --> 00:32:29,003 Hey, there, little girl. 809 00:32:29,355 --> 00:32:30,483 How are you? 810 00:32:32,067 --> 00:32:33,552 How are you? 811 00:32:35,927 --> 00:32:37,742 Do you think Luke is lonely? 812 00:32:37,806 --> 00:32:38,992 I mean for real. 813 00:32:39,286 --> 00:32:41,972 He does look a little lonely around the eyes. 814 00:32:42,007 --> 00:32:43,871 I think he's lovesick over Lorelai. 815 00:32:43,906 --> 00:32:45,120 Oh, boy. 816 00:32:45,157 --> 00:32:46,743 T.J., I'm serious. 817 00:32:46,776 --> 00:32:49,473 I just think that he might be better off lonely. 818 00:32:49,507 --> 00:32:51,191 I think they belong together. 819 00:32:51,225 --> 00:32:53,313 That's not what you said when they broke up. 820 00:32:53,348 --> 00:32:55,851 I always thought what you said then made a lot of sense, 821 00:32:55,885 --> 00:33:00,203 about them being in two different space-time continuums, something like that. 822 00:33:00,235 --> 00:33:01,900 It's all about the wormholes. 823 00:33:01,935 --> 00:33:03,450 Between the dimensions? 824 00:33:03,485 --> 00:33:06,113 Yep, all they've got to do is find the right wormhole. 825 00:33:06,766 --> 00:33:08,080 I don't know. 826 00:33:14,408 --> 00:33:18,703 So, if you want to access your bank and credit-card account information, you...? 827 00:33:19,088 --> 00:33:20,383 Click "cashflow center." 828 00:33:20,415 --> 00:33:23,452 Yes, and if you want to see any of these menus, 829 00:33:23,488 --> 00:33:27,103 you right-click right... yes. 830 00:33:27,306 --> 00:33:30,561 And if I want the hidden account bar, 831 00:33:30,598 --> 00:33:33,642 I double-click that arrow thing up there on the left. 832 00:33:33,677 --> 00:33:35,353 Mom, exactly. 833 00:33:37,347 --> 00:33:39,213 I don't know how I'm gonna do all this. 834 00:33:39,245 --> 00:33:41,861 Mom, what are you talking about? You just click, click, click. 835 00:33:41,898 --> 00:33:43,032 You got it all down. 836 00:33:43,066 --> 00:33:45,561 Now, but I barely understand what you've been telling me. 837 00:33:45,595 --> 00:33:47,091 This is your father's job. 838 00:33:47,126 --> 00:33:49,511 Well, he'll be back on the job soon enough. 839 00:33:49,546 --> 00:33:51,830 I don't know. Have you seen him? He's wearing a dressing gown. 840 00:33:51,865 --> 00:33:53,463 I know. He's watching TV in the bedroom. 841 00:33:53,478 --> 00:33:55,261 I know, mom. You've got to give the guy a break. 842 00:33:55,297 --> 00:33:57,742 He's not gonna watch TV in the bedroom forever. 843 00:33:57,777 --> 00:34:00,031 No. No, he's not. 844 00:34:00,068 --> 00:34:02,560 Oh, my God, I don't mean he's gonna die. 845 00:34:02,598 --> 00:34:04,373 What are you telling me? That he's going to live forever? 846 00:34:04,406 --> 00:34:05,943 That he's immortal? Is that what you're telling me? 847 00:34:05,977 --> 00:34:09,071 No, I'm just saying, with time, you know... 848 00:34:09,108 --> 00:34:10,573 It's like a canoe. 849 00:34:11,355 --> 00:34:13,581 - What's like a canoe? - Life. 850 00:34:13,615 --> 00:34:14,613 Okay. 851 00:34:14,645 --> 00:34:17,320 You're just paddling along in a canoe. 852 00:34:17,358 --> 00:34:19,241 Mother, have you ever been in a canoe? 853 00:34:19,677 --> 00:34:21,980 I just can't picture you in a canoe. 854 00:34:22,015 --> 00:34:25,082 Your father and I have been paddling a canoe together for years. 855 00:34:25,116 --> 00:34:27,423 Only now, he's dropped the paddle. 856 00:34:27,697 --> 00:34:28,962 He just dropped it. 857 00:34:28,997 --> 00:34:32,290 Not only that, but now the canoe is going in circles. 858 00:34:32,897 --> 00:34:35,740 Without your father there, I'm paddling on my side 859 00:34:35,776 --> 00:34:37,830 and the canoe is spinning in circles, 860 00:34:37,865 --> 00:34:40,142 and the harder I paddle, the faster it spins, 861 00:34:40,175 --> 00:34:42,540 and it's hard work, and I'm getting tired. 862 00:34:42,577 --> 00:34:43,911 Dizzy, I would think. 863 00:34:45,366 --> 00:34:47,813 You are in a kayak. 864 00:34:47,845 --> 00:34:49,633 You know how to do all of this. 865 00:34:49,857 --> 00:34:51,791 How does that put me in a kayak? 866 00:34:51,828 --> 00:34:54,951 Kayaks have paddles with things on both ends. 867 00:34:54,988 --> 00:34:56,493 You steer it by yourself. 868 00:34:56,527 --> 00:34:58,940 Mom, you know how to do things by yourself. 869 00:34:58,976 --> 00:35:00,720 You are totally capable. 870 00:35:00,758 --> 00:35:03,243 Sure, I went to Smith, and I was a history major, 871 00:35:03,276 --> 00:35:05,902 but I never had any plans to be an historian. 872 00:35:05,938 --> 00:35:07,961 I was always going to be a wife. 873 00:35:07,998 --> 00:35:11,282 I mean, the way I saw it, a woman's job was to run a home, 874 00:35:11,316 --> 00:35:13,583 organize the social life of a family, 875 00:35:13,616 --> 00:35:16,191 and bolster her husband while he earned a living. 876 00:35:16,227 --> 00:35:19,843 It was a good system, and it was working very well all these years. 877 00:35:19,875 --> 00:35:22,622 Only when your husband isn't there because he's watching television 878 00:35:22,658 --> 00:35:26,021 in a dressing gown, you realize how dependent you are. 879 00:35:26,056 --> 00:35:28,161 I didn't even know I owned windmills. 880 00:35:28,196 --> 00:35:31,273 Mom, now you know, and you know how to right-click. 881 00:35:31,305 --> 00:35:32,400 But you. 882 00:35:32,585 --> 00:35:35,023 You provide for yourself. 883 00:35:35,228 --> 00:35:37,090 You're not dependent on anyone. 884 00:35:37,468 --> 00:35:39,112 You're independent. 885 00:35:39,146 --> 00:35:41,202 I am kayak, hear me roar. 886 00:35:41,235 --> 00:35:42,712 I mean, look at you. 887 00:35:42,747 --> 00:35:46,922 For all these years, you've done very well without a husband. 888 00:35:46,956 --> 00:35:48,463 Maybe so, 889 00:35:48,646 --> 00:35:50,932 but I still wanted it to work out. 890 00:35:50,966 --> 00:35:55,322 You know, the way I was raised, if a married couple split up, it was a disaster, 891 00:35:55,356 --> 00:35:57,821 because it meant the system had fallen apart, 892 00:35:57,855 --> 00:36:00,693 and it was particularly bad for the woman because she had to go out 893 00:36:00,728 --> 00:36:02,440 and find herself another rich husband, 894 00:36:02,477 --> 00:36:04,182 only she was older now. 895 00:36:04,218 --> 00:36:07,332 But with you, it's not such a disaster, is it? 896 00:36:07,365 --> 00:36:08,711 I guess not. 897 00:36:08,745 --> 00:36:11,902 It's really not such a horrible thing that you're going to get a divorce, 898 00:36:11,935 --> 00:36:13,301 not really. 899 00:36:13,468 --> 00:36:15,880 Oh, you're gonna be fine. 900 00:36:17,757 --> 00:36:19,162 Thanks, mom. 901 00:36:19,198 --> 00:36:22,251 You may even marry someone else someday. Who knows? 902 00:36:24,288 --> 00:36:25,541 Who knows? 903 00:36:29,826 --> 00:36:32,140 Do you know what I think impressed my dad the most? 904 00:36:32,175 --> 00:36:35,593 You eating a 24-ounce steak. Seriously, it was, like, a magic trick to him. 905 00:36:35,628 --> 00:36:36,852 It was a pretty fun dinner, though. 906 00:36:36,887 --> 00:36:38,003 Yeah, it was. 907 00:36:38,035 --> 00:36:41,092 Whoa! Look at all this! 908 00:36:41,317 --> 00:36:44,443 Ace! Oh, my god, you got me a piñata! 909 00:36:44,478 --> 00:36:46,300 Well, you deserve a piñata. 910 00:36:46,338 --> 00:36:48,463 I couldn't reach the ceiling, so I just... 911 00:36:49,446 --> 00:36:51,842 - Hey, um, Logan... - Yeah? 912 00:36:54,307 --> 00:36:57,593 Your dad and I had a bit of a weird conversation tonight. 913 00:36:57,628 --> 00:36:58,642 - Oh yeah? - Yeah. 914 00:36:58,676 --> 00:37:03,100 He started thanking me for guiding you and steering you, or -- I don't know. 915 00:37:03,135 --> 00:37:06,631 And then he said that he and I should start planning your future, 916 00:37:06,668 --> 00:37:07,913 like, together. 917 00:37:07,948 --> 00:37:10,770 - Well, that's my dad for you. - Well, it felt really weird. 918 00:37:11,306 --> 00:37:13,683 I felt like we were conspiring or something. 919 00:37:13,717 --> 00:37:15,951 I didn't even agree with what he was saying. 920 00:37:15,985 --> 00:37:17,832 I ended up toasting. I toasted him. 921 00:37:17,868 --> 00:37:18,801 What did you toast? 922 00:37:18,837 --> 00:37:21,083 "To being on the same page," which I'm not. 923 00:37:21,118 --> 00:37:23,131 I'm not even on the same page with him. 924 00:37:23,165 --> 00:37:25,962 I actually think that everything you've accomplished 925 00:37:25,997 --> 00:37:28,851 is just because you've worked hard, and I'm proud of you. 926 00:37:28,886 --> 00:37:32,041 I don't even know how the conversation ended up where it did. 927 00:37:32,075 --> 00:37:35,003 It's okay. You know what just happened? You got Hunzbergered. 928 00:37:35,036 --> 00:37:37,581 That's what my dad does to people. He's a master in manipulating. 929 00:37:37,617 --> 00:37:39,281 You sit down, and you have your own opinions. 930 00:37:39,316 --> 00:37:41,731 By the time you stand up, you hear yourself agreeing with him, 931 00:37:41,766 --> 00:37:43,682 and you stagger away confused and queasy. 932 00:37:43,716 --> 00:37:46,423 Yes! That's exactly it! I got Hunzbergered! 933 00:37:46,458 --> 00:37:48,073 It happens to the best of us. 934 00:37:48,107 --> 00:37:49,870 Well, I'm glad you're not upset. 935 00:37:49,905 --> 00:37:51,383 No, not at all. 936 00:37:51,415 --> 00:37:54,132 I mean, I don't like the fact that the guy thinks of me as some kind of puppet, 937 00:37:54,167 --> 00:37:56,971 but pretty soon, he's gonna have to rethink that one. 938 00:37:57,465 --> 00:37:59,560 You got me twister. I never had twister. 939 00:37:59,598 --> 00:38:00,822 - You didn't? - No. 940 00:38:00,857 --> 00:38:04,420 It was a childhood of deprivation. Oh, and "Pin the tail on the --" 941 00:38:04,458 --> 00:38:06,741 - What animal is that? - Oh, that was a donkey. 942 00:38:06,775 --> 00:38:08,773 But I messed the ears up, put antlers on it. 943 00:38:08,806 --> 00:38:10,423 Now it's "pin the tail on the moose." 944 00:38:10,467 --> 00:38:12,802 I never had "pin the tail on the moose" as a boy, either. 945 00:38:12,835 --> 00:38:14,140 Poor little rich boy. 946 00:38:14,177 --> 00:38:15,892 I think that since we're short on time, 947 00:38:15,926 --> 00:38:18,583 we should skip to the classic 12th birthday -- 948 00:38:18,616 --> 00:38:20,082 ice-skating in central park. 949 00:38:20,115 --> 00:38:21,990 - Sounds good. - Great. I'll go change. 950 00:38:24,765 --> 00:38:26,502 Hey, Philip, what's up, man? 951 00:38:26,536 --> 00:38:28,621 I'm afraid I've got some grim news. 952 00:38:29,167 --> 00:38:30,540 What? What's going on? 953 00:38:30,575 --> 00:38:32,700 I just got off the line with our lawyers. They say they just got 954 00:38:32,737 --> 00:38:34,803 a cease-and-desist letter from Prism Active, 955 00:38:34,837 --> 00:38:38,921 this tech company in Palo Alto, claming prior art on our media 10 platform. 956 00:38:38,955 --> 00:38:41,411 - They're reviewing the patent now, but -- - What do you mean, "prior art"? 957 00:38:41,448 --> 00:38:43,300 They're claiming patent infringement. 958 00:38:43,338 --> 00:38:44,921 That's what we bought. Our patent's pending. 959 00:38:44,956 --> 00:38:46,962 We bought that technology. That's the entire value of the company. 960 00:38:46,997 --> 00:38:49,243 They're saying it's worthless. It was already owned. 961 00:38:49,275 --> 00:38:52,311 They were just waiting for someone to buy in before they sued. 962 00:38:52,345 --> 00:38:53,532 Oh, my god. 963 00:38:53,568 --> 00:38:54,920 I'm so sorry. 964 00:38:55,607 --> 00:38:57,190 Happy birthday, man. 965 00:39:03,775 --> 00:39:06,290 Okay. Close your eyes. 966 00:39:09,755 --> 00:39:11,252 Are they closed? 967 00:39:13,618 --> 00:39:14,840 They're closed. 968 00:39:15,645 --> 00:39:18,753 Okay. Voilà. 969 00:39:20,065 --> 00:39:23,362 Wow. It's a giant, furry -- what the hell? 970 00:39:23,397 --> 00:39:27,333 It's a russian ushanka, which also doubles as a birthday crown. 971 00:39:27,638 --> 00:39:29,072 Wow. I bet I look great. 972 00:39:29,105 --> 00:39:30,561 Mmm, you have no idea. 973 00:39:38,346 --> 00:39:39,901 - Hey, Luke. - Hey, T.J. 974 00:39:39,937 --> 00:39:42,591 You know what you could use? A changing table. 975 00:39:42,626 --> 00:39:45,711 Yeah, and if you're getting stuff for your apartment, you should get a dryer. 976 00:39:45,745 --> 00:39:49,262 Yeah, I'm not getting things. Why do I need a dryer? 977 00:39:49,296 --> 00:39:50,622 Sopping towels. 978 00:39:50,655 --> 00:39:52,351 And why are the towels sopping? 979 00:39:52,387 --> 00:39:55,761 My bad. I forgot you said not to use the garbage disposal. 980 00:39:55,797 --> 00:39:58,551 Well, not forgot, so much as, I thought you were exaggerating. 981 00:39:58,588 --> 00:39:59,982 I wasn't exaggerating. 982 00:40:00,015 --> 00:40:01,771 And we have more bad news. 983 00:40:01,805 --> 00:40:02,691 Oh, yeah? 984 00:40:02,725 --> 00:40:05,862 The exterminator said the moths turned out to be rice moths. 985 00:40:05,897 --> 00:40:08,320 And this means you'll be staying how much longer? 986 00:40:08,356 --> 00:40:10,130 Which means we're headed home right now. 987 00:40:10,165 --> 00:40:11,881 Most of the stuff's already in the car. 988 00:40:11,916 --> 00:40:14,972 Rice moths are a snap to get rid of. They're already gone. 989 00:40:15,008 --> 00:40:17,951 It's just a bummer to leave, 'cause we've been having such a good time. 990 00:40:17,988 --> 00:40:21,872 Yeah, but Doula should be in her own home. 991 00:40:21,908 --> 00:40:23,972 That's what we thought, plus your mattress. 992 00:40:24,007 --> 00:40:25,440 Not so comfortable, shall we say. 993 00:40:25,478 --> 00:40:27,070 Yeah, well, sorry about that. 994 00:40:27,188 --> 00:40:29,511 No worries, no worries, but... 995 00:40:29,546 --> 00:40:32,471 put it on the list of things you're gonna fix around here. 996 00:40:32,505 --> 00:40:33,550 - All right, then. - All right. 997 00:40:33,587 --> 00:40:34,982 - Thanks again. - Okay. 998 00:40:35,017 --> 00:40:38,160 Your casa is my casa. For that, I'm grateful. 999 00:40:38,195 --> 00:40:41,162 You take care and call if you're feeling lonely. 1000 00:40:41,195 --> 00:40:42,581 We will come and visit. 1001 00:40:42,617 --> 00:40:44,363 - Okay, anytime. - Sounds great. 1002 00:40:44,395 --> 00:40:46,130 Anytime, I mean it. 1003 00:40:47,408 --> 00:40:49,080 - Bye. - Bye. 1004 00:41:06,525 --> 00:41:07,740 Good morning. 1005 00:41:07,775 --> 00:41:09,320 Good morning. Would you like some coffee? 1006 00:41:09,358 --> 00:41:10,392 Yes. 1007 00:41:10,425 --> 00:41:12,550 Oh, I woke up this morning, and I've got to say, 1008 00:41:12,586 --> 00:41:15,910 for the first time in my life, I got where the teetotalers are coming from. 1009 00:41:15,945 --> 00:41:18,250 If I had a hatchet and a barrel of booze, 1010 00:41:18,288 --> 00:41:19,591 forget about it. 1011 00:41:20,918 --> 00:41:22,030 What are you up to today? 1012 00:41:22,068 --> 00:41:26,341 Today? I'm going to attend a D.A.R. lecture on the native american artwork. 1013 00:41:26,375 --> 00:41:29,571 Then I have a lunch with Sarah Montgomery Brown and Melissa Seria, 1014 00:41:29,607 --> 00:41:32,462 and, of course, I'll have my hands full canceling the party. 1015 00:41:32,496 --> 00:41:34,340 I've already called the florist and the hall. 1016 00:41:34,378 --> 00:41:36,470 We'll only get 60% of our deposit back, 1017 00:41:36,508 --> 00:41:38,721 but that's better than nothing. 1018 00:41:40,707 --> 00:41:42,253 I should go. 1019 00:41:42,648 --> 00:41:45,083 I need time to change before I have to go to the Inn. 1020 00:41:45,116 --> 00:41:46,331 Fine. 1021 00:41:47,368 --> 00:41:49,811 Thank you for your help with the quicken last night. 1022 00:41:51,258 --> 00:41:52,572 You're welcome. 1023 00:41:54,397 --> 00:41:59,070 Transcript : Raceman Subtitles : Willow's Team www.forom.com