When you think of Cape Cod you probably think of beaches...
lobster, little fishing villages.
Well, I grew up here, and I mostly think of baseball.
The best amateur ball in the country is played in the Cape Cod Baseball League.
Playing here is the chance of a lifetime.
I've been mowing this field in Chatham since I was 14.
But this summer it feels a little different.
If you're a college player like me, the Cape is where you want to go for the summer.
Little towns like Yarmouth and Dennis, Wareham and Chatham.
Families open their homes to kids from all over the country...
who come to show their stuff to big league scouts.
Hi, I'm Billy Brubaker. This is Miles...
Dalrymple. Love y'all's house.
So, how's the surf?
Some of us are farther away from home than we've ever been.
Staying with people who have strange ideas about being a house parent.
Are you hungry, honey?
Come here, I have something for you.
They say one in six big leaguers played in the Cape League.
I can't count all the ones I've seen play on this field.
Bagwell, Bell, Biggio, Nomar, Mo Vaughn, the Big Hurt.
I've watched so many dreams come true and die...
on the ball fields of the Cape.
Hard as it is to believe, now it's my turn.
Now I'm the guy the scouts will be watching.
Now I'm the guy putting it on the line every time I take the mound.
This is my last shot to make it.
The last house on the block, you might say.
While it might be an advantage to sleep in my own bed...
the night before the first team meeting, I figured I'd leave nothing to chance.
I've been accused of being my own worst enemy.
So this time I wanted to focus...
to make sure nothing got in the way of the most important summer of my life.
Good morning, Sunshine.
All right, come on!
Look. No offense, Dede, but I can't do this tonight.
Ryan, where's your team spirit?
I'm dressed for practice tomorrow, man.
I'm dressed for practice.
I'm staying here tonight. I can't be late.
That's cool.
Sorry. We just wanted to celebrate our buddy.
Local boy playing for the Chatham A's with all those fancy college kids.
We're very proud of you, Ryan.
I'm serious! I made a vow to swear off women and beer.
Y'all gotta get out of here. Go.
All right, we're out. Let's go, come on.
It's your last chance, lawn boy.
Because I'll be working on the vineyard all summer long.
I just want you to take a good, hard look at exactly what you're passing up on.
So as you spend the rest of your life...
riding that mower up and down the great grass of the Cape.
l want you to have that one...
burning image in your mind of the one that got away.
All right. One beer. That's it.
Can I do our special style?
Special style.
Domo, honey.
Are you awake?
Domo, I know you're not sleeping.
Okay. Sleep tight. Don't let the bed bugs bite.
I've got to get some sleep.
Don't.
Wait! Why do girls always take my underwear?
Because boxers are more comfortable.
Fine. I'll wear yours.
This is my thong.
I feel alive in my thong.
I can run in my thong.
Naughty, naughty lawn boy.
Wake up, honey. You got to go to practice. Get up!
8:00 means 8:00.
I'm sure most of you spent last night reading the Cape League program...
checking each other's stats, staring up at that strange ceiling...
asking yourself the question: "Can I make it?"
Just being invited to play in the Cape Cod Baseball League...
means that you're the cream of the college crop.
It's an honor just to be asked. I hope you all take pride in that.
Where are my clothes?
She took my clothes!
This is not happening.
You are now the Chatham A's, gentlemen, which means you are...
Ryan Dunne.
I'm sorry. I was here, I was there.
Knock it off!
Outfielders, with Coach Sully.
Infielders, with Coach Ward.
Pitchers to the bullpen. Move!
Coach, what happened was...
Strike two.
I know what happened at that junior college in Framingham.
I thought I'd give you a chance anyway.
- Coach. - Shut up and listen.
This summer league is one step away from getting paid to play baseball.
Look. I know you've had a bad loss in your personal life. I'm sorry about that.
But I don't have any room on this roster for some hardheaded, local wiseass...
who thinks the rules don't apply to him.
So, like I said: "Strike two."
Mr. Parrish, remember my son Ryan?
How are you doing?
Fellows, could you do me a favor and not park trucks on the main driveway?
Just use the service drive from now on, would you? Thanks.
I drove by the Chamberlains'. I thought you were going to do their lawn this morning.
I had practice.
How's the coach?
I thought I told you not to talk to him.
I didn't talk to him.
Someone told him the story about mom dying.
Maybe someone's trying to help you.
Thanks, but I can screw this up on my own.
- I'll meet you over there. - Get us something.
Give me three Sam Adams.
Man, what's that look for?
I heard my little brother showed up late for practice wearing a skirt.
Coach Schiffner didn't strike me as the type to find that funny.
No more talking to the coach, got it?
Fine. Can I tell Pop about the skirt? He'd be so proud.
I don't know, Mike, I don't want to disappoint him.
After all, he set such high standards for us.
What's up, Ryan? Let's go play some pool.
I've got to go talk to these guys. I'll come back.
Yeah. Go, Chatham A's.
Van Leemer, so why are you here?
Dodgers offered me $2,000,000. That's chump change.
I'll pitch a few games here. I figure they'll come to their senses...
tack on an extra half mil.
Nice.
I'm sorry, you had something to say?
- No. - Ryan!
Sorry, I didn't recognize you without your ass hanging out of your banana hammock...
sobbing, "Sorry, Coach. Here's my skirt. It was there, I was here."
That was you, right? I'm sorry.
Listen, gentlemen, we're going to talk to some ladies.
Walk away. Let's go talk to some women. Come on. Let it go.
Boys, enjoy your cocktails. We'll see you later.
Thanks for stopping by.
Meet these ladies, be my wingman, and you can get out of here.
Lauren Hodges, allow me to introduce you to a good friend of mine, this is Ryan Dune.
- Dunne! - Hi.
- And this is her friend... - Tenley Parrish.
Unfortunately Ryan has to...
sit down and stay for a while.
I know you. I mean, I've seen you somewhere before.
I'm a pitcher for the Chatham A's.
No. I never go to games. I like sports, but it's hot and I'm a swimmer.
Look who it is. My favorite lawn boy.
Didn't get that job on the vineyard.
But I still want my underwears back.
Where is my orange thong? Where on Earth could my orange thong possibly be?
You seem to be disarmingly uncomfortable right now...
so why don't you just give me my underwears back?
I can't.
Why not?
I'm still wearing them.
You spit on me! Get out.
Wait a minute. You're a ball player and you wear women's underwear.
What else should I know about you?
I've been cutting the grass at your summer house for the last six years.
- What? - 642 Shore Road.
We also check the pipes in the winter to keep them from freezing.
We?
Me and my dad.
Ryan Dunne.
Runnin' down.
Fire that thing!
Come on, Cal. One more, baby, let's go.
- That's it! That's the nasty hammer. - Here he comes, folks.
The circus act has arrived.
Did they give you batteries with that glove?
Let's go, Ryan Dunne.
Come on, Ryan, get up on there now!
How do you like me now?
That's nice! Very nice, Dunne. All right.
- You can drive? - Yeah.
Where did you go last night? Miles here met twins.
- Really? - I met a girl.
A girl so big I thought she was twins.
She was big, huh?
- How can I say this? - How do you say this?
She was fat and that ain't with a "PH" kid.
She was fat?
Dude this girl had strings hanging off her from the last time they steered her out at the streets' parade.
All right, I had a few beers.
Lauren's friend was asking about you.
- Really? - Yeah, man.
I told them we'd meet them tonight for ice cream. Is that cool?
- Yeah. - Miles, you can come too.
There's got to be at least one fat chick at the ice cream shop.
I swear to God!
I've got some burgers in there.
I hit the Deli on the way home.
Can you work tomorrow?
I got a game.
Are you pitching?
No, this kid Van Leemer.
Is he good?
Yeah. He's good. Throws hard.
Harder than you?
Not a lot of guys throw harder than you.
Let me know about your lawns. One way or another, they got to get done.
Billy Brubaker, catcher from USC...
and Ryan Dunne, left-handed pitcher from Chatham.
Would you sign these?
Pretty big Chatham A's fan?
The biggest. Plus, I was looking you up for my sister.
Who's your sister?
Tenley Parrish.
Hey, guys! Come here!
I'm going to be the A's mascot.
- Hi. - That's great! What is the A's mascot?
Well, I'm still working on that. Maybe a big, fuzzy dog.
The Chatham Fuzzy Dogs? "Go, Fuzzy Dogs"?
"I love the Fuzzy Dogs! "
We're going to get some ice cream, okay?
Okay.
Actually, my dad has a plan for me.
What's the plan?
He set me up with this job in San Francisco.
My uncle is a partner in this investment firm. I don't know.
That sounds good.
No, it's a good job. It's just that it's what my dad wants.
So, you want to be an architect?
Maybe. I'd like to go back to school to find out.
It's something that makes me feel special. It is personal.
It's about seeing the beauty in things.
This one professor of mine always used to say:...
"The greatest tool for an architect is your eyes."
You have beautiful eyes.
Is that a line?
Yeah. Kind of. Did it work?
Yeah. Kind of.
You have some ice cream.
These aren't local girls?
Summer people.
Some are people, some are not.
Lauren has lived in the same house her family has had for 40 years.
This big-ass vacation house over on.
626 Shore Road. My dad does her yard.
This Tenley girl is rich, too?
It takes me half a day to cut the grass.
So, you mow her lawn, and now you're trying to mow her lawn?
Welcome, ladies and gentlemen.
Please join me in thanking the Rotary Club for their generous donation...
that helped finance our brand new press box and concession stand.
Please give a warm welcome to the new radio voice of the Chatham A's...
Mr. Curt Gowdy.
Thank you.
Play ball!
Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to the season opener for the Chatham A's.
And today, the A's square off against the Wareham Gatemen.
What a beautiful day for baseball.
A perfect start to the Cape League's 115th season.
On the mound today, is the much touted Eric Van Leemer.
A hard throwing right-hander from Wichita State.
Strike three called.
The A's new mascot likes what she sees.
Damn. He throws hard.
Yeah, Van Leemer is an All-American.
The Dodgers offered him $2,000,000.
Yeah, I heard.
Ryan! Sorry, I didn't recognize you without your ass hanging out...
Swing and a miss, and the Gatemen go down in order.
And so far, Van Leemer appears as advertised.
- What's up? - Scout, 3 o'clock.
Quit drooling. July 4 they'll be a dozen of them at every game.
Well, I'm sorry, Dodger Blue.
The A's are looking for more here in the sixth, as Billy Brubaker stands in.
Fast hands, now.
Brubaker is struggling with these wooden bats, as are so many Cape League hitters.
Swing and a miss. Strike three. Brubaker's second strikeout of the day.
Wood bats suck.
Why do you think God invented aluminum? Goddamn it!
We'll get you a titanium bat, Brubaker.
Ryan Dunne!
Yes, sir.
- How are you feeling? - Good, strong, ready.
Good. I need you to go up in the stands and pass the hat.
Yes, sir.
Give them hell, Ry.
They should have chili at this, Pete. I don't care what you say.
- They don't have chili. - But they should.
- What's up, Ry? - What's up, man?
- How you doing? - What are you doing here?
What does it look like I'm doing?
- Right. - Sorry, man.
Wait! Here you go.
What are you doing? I paid for those chips. It's a donation hat.
I know, dude. You don't want to mess with the hat. The hat is sacred.
All right. Pete, it's cool. Chill, man. People are looking.
And a deep drive to straightaway center, back, back.
Dalrymple leaps over the fence and makes a spectacular catch.
What a play.
Now Van Leemer is one out away from a complete game shutout here in the opener.
He hasn't been in a jam all day.
There's a lazy fly ball to short left center.
Dalrymple drifts in and makes the catch.
The opener is in the books...
and the strength of a brilliant four-hit shutout by Eric Van Leemer.
Great game, huh?
Zero for four, two strikeouts.
Nobody hit, man.
You went two for five.
- Weak. Tweener and a duck. - Tweener and a duck each gets you on base.
- Yo, Bru. - Yeah?
- I need your help. - What?
I seem to have this splinter stuck in my ass...
and I was wondering if you could help me.
Please? Come on, man. Let's go get a beer.
Hey, Miles.
I didn't mean to interrupt or anything, but can you help me out here?
What's up?
Go ahead, tell him.
- Are you all right? - Yeah.
It's my house mom.
She's over 40. She's old enough to be my mom.
Dude, she's hot and she wants his Johnson.
- Is she married? - No.
Are you a virgin?
You don't have to answer that.
What should he do? Let's see.
Get out of here!
Go on, right now. Go home and tap that ass.
Get out of here! It won't take long.
He's got a bubble-butt.
Domo does. The kid has got a bubble-butt.
Why are you looking at me like that?
I play center field. I look at infielders from behind.
Pitchers, too. Ryan has got a great ass.
Van Leemer's got a big butt. Big can on that guy.
Yeah.
There's nothing sexual about what I'm saying. Alright?
Okay.
- Lauren and Tenley here yet? - Not yet.
Miles thinks you have a nice pooper.
Thank you, Miles.
Yeah.
You're right.
Nice shot, Pete. It's all over now, baby blue.
But I can understand, because you weren't wearing the right shoes, right?
Why is that?
Does Nike make a pool shoes?
That's enough. Are you looking for a little exercise?
Ryan, don't be that guy! Do not be that guy.
Okay? Walk it off. Good night.
I'll be back.
Why does this keep happening? Shouldn't it be the other way around?
The girl leaves the bar and the guy chases her?
What was the problem back there?
Nothing, it's old friends and new friends.
I saw you at the game.
I had to pick up Katie and I saw you there.
Those outfits are cute.
They're nice. I like a pinstripe.
It's slimming. It makes you look thin.
Not that you're fat or anything.
And you wear your socks really high. It's sweet.
It's cool. It's cool.
Your whole outfit, or uniform. "Uniform," that's what it's called, right?
Okay, I'm going to shut up now.
I've got a game, so... I'm gonna go home.
Wait.
Someone left fresh cut flowers on my windowsill this morning.
It was really sweet.
I'll make sure I get the message.
Everything you do, on the field and off the field...
affects your wallet.
It's a shame to be hitting .190 on the field...
because you're hitting .700 in some gin mill.
It's a shame to see your dreams and your bank accounts...
go up in smoke.
Any more garbage from you guys...
and your ass will be warming the sticky vinyl of a bus seat back to Mommy.
I don't care who you are. Now, get out of here.
Give me a C! C! You got your C, you got your C.
Give me an H, H! You got your H, you got your H.
Hey, Katie.
What are you, the Chatham oatmeal cookie or something?
I'm a clam. The Chatham Clam.
Clammy the Clam? Don't you get it?
Yeah, Clammy the Clam. Don't get steamed, all right?
Didn't I get clams from Dede Mulligan?
Pete, you got crabs from Dede Mulligan. Crabs.
Right.
Quite a pitcher's duel as we move to the sixth.
The big story so far is Ryan Dunne.
The first local kid to play in the Cape League in seven years.
He dropped out of Boston College then got kicked off the team at Framingham State...
for getting into a fight with a teammate.
Coach Schiffner told me before the game...
that he sees something special in this young lefty.
Come on, Ryan, play catch with me. Just play catch.
Dunne is in his first jam here.
What do you want? See this? Take this.
There go the runners. Swing and a miss, strike three! Throw to third...
double play!
And just like that, Dunne is out of a jam.
Domo leads off first for the A's in the bottom of the sixth.
There's a line drive base hit by Dale Robin.
Two on now for Billy Brubaker, who still seems uncomfortable at the plate.
Swing and a miss. Strike three.
There's a long drive to deep left center field way back...
way back, and that ball is out of here!
A three-run homer for Miles Dalrymple and the A's take a 3-1 lead.
Here we go, Miles!
Yeah, Miles, way to go! Big stick!
Yo, Leemer. What's the deal with Knight? Why is he always sleeping?
He's the closer, Domo. He needs his rest.
Especially when Dunne's pitching.
With a bevy of scouts looking on...
Dunne has suddenly lost his control here in the ninth.
Having grown up in the shadow of this field...
Dunne would certainly like to make his debut here a success...
but he's got his hands full right now.
Dunne got away with one right there.
Come on now, learn your lesson. Stay out of his kitchen.
I got it! I got it!
Good, then get it.
Dunne shakes him off again.
You want it? You're going to bring it, come on!
Briggs hits a bomb to right and it is gone.
A grand slam.
With one swing, the Braves have taken a 5-4 lead here in the ninth.
A's down to their last out now.
Brubaker stands in, still looking for his first hit of the summer.
Swing and a miss! Strike three!
Tough loss tonight.
Nine innings, six hits, five runs...
three walks, eight strikeouts...
and one big mistake.
I was talking to one of the scouts, the guy in the suspenders.
He's from the Phillies.
He was curious about your college career. I made up a few stories.
That's great, Dad.
I'm trying to help here, hotshot.
Most important thing in your life, you don't want my help? You are not interested?
I got some place to be!
Chasing some Shore Road princess...
who's trying to get Daddy's attention by screwing the lawn boy?
- What's all this? - I'm out of here.
You could turn this thing around. It's a long summer.
Striking out in front of pro scouts all summer is not exactly what I had in mind.
Besides, I already told my house parents that I quit.
You can stay with me.
I'm going home.
I was gonna go see Auggie at the Oasis.
Why don't you have a beer and a bowl of chowder with me before you split?
Last bus isn't till 2:00.
- Sounds cool. - It's not a problem.
Here's to going back to Cali, Cali, Cali.
To California.
Auggie is going to make sure you get to the bus station before 2:00.
- What? - I got to go meet Tenley.
My God! I'm getting jacked for a girl.
Please understand. I'll come visit you at SC.
Right on.
- Thanks. - Yeah, man.
Kill them! Go get them, all right?
Have a safe flight.
Auggie, take care of him.
- Have you met my sister Dede Mulligan? - I don't believe so.
- Charmed. What's your name? - Billy Brubaker.
Hello, Billy Brubaker.
I appreciate you guys taking me to the bus station to make sure I get off okay.
Don't worry, Bru. I'll make sure you get off just right.
You just put your butt in my face.
- Did you like it? - I always like a butt in my face.
I'm going to take you on the shortcut to the bus.
Just don't turn around, and take your time around the corners.
My mom was a great lady.
She could have an entire conversation without you saying anything.
My dad would come home after working all day in the sun and he'd have a beer...
my mom would just be chatting away...
and my dad would nod off right at the kitchen table.
I just look at him...
stare at him, and I see failure.
Like after the game tonight, he just smiled at me.
Like this, "Welcome."
"Welcome to failure."
He wants you to fail?
He did. My brother did.
Forget them. What do you want?
I want to make it.
I want to play pro ball.
Then you will. You just have to allow yourself to succeed.
You want big rewards, you've got to take big risks.
Don't worry, Bru, I'm a licensed professional.
You got the Dede Mulligan midnight special!
Are you still mad we missed the bus?
I don't know if you paid attention, but the Big Bad Bru is back...
and he's all nuded up.
She was awesome.
She made the grapes disappear.
What grapes?
I'll see you tonight, buddy.
Domo, good morning.
Time to get up.
I made something special for you.
- When is your next start? - I don't know.
Thinking about pitching?
What else would I be thinking about?
Rand Parrish's daughter.
You don't know what you're talking about.
You're setting yourself up for a big fall.
Yeah, I know. Shore Road princess.
- You slept late today. - She was out late.
With Ryan Dunne.
Who?
Super cute southpaw. Got a shot if he can harness that temper.
The kid who cuts the grass?
Sean Dunne is a good landscaper...
but his kid is a little rough around the edges, don't you think?
- Relax, Rand. - There's nothing going on.
Charlie Hunt called. He and his wife are planning a trip up to the Cape.
I told you Chris and I are taking some time off this summer.
Does that mean his parents can't plan a vacation?
No, but I'm sure that you invited them to Chatham.
He did, but don't worry, they can't make it.
Chris got on the phone to say hello and we chatted for a minute.
I invited him up for a game of golf.
He'll be here on the 25th.
Tenley, don't overreact. Your father and Chris...
We like to play golf. What's the big deal?
Great, Dad. Then you marry him, because I'm not ready to.
Dad.
This is Billy Brubaker, our catcher.
So you met Dede Mulligan last night?
Yeah, I like Dede.
Nice thong.
Thanks.
Domo, come here, honey.
I have something for you.
I'm going to sleep now.
Marjorie, I'm ready.
I'll be right out, Miles. Read me that poem you wrote for me again.
I can do that.
"She is large and she is hot,...
she's in charge and I am not.
She consumes me with her size,...
cannot believe my eyes.
I so love her shapely belly,...
that moves around like grapely jelly.
I wish that there was more of me so I could love more Marjorie."
Nothing better than swimming in the rain.
Excuse me?
- What are you doing? - Finally got you to chase me.
Aren't your parents home?
Yeah. So? I'm not allowed to swim in my own pool?
You're not going to make me swim alone, are you?
Swimming in the rain.
You were thinking about kissing me, weren't you?
No!
Now that I said that, you're thinking about it.
No, I'm thinking that's what you're thinking.
No, I think I can swim the length and back underwater.
- $5 says you can't. - You got it.
Who's out there?
Vivi, get me a flashlight!
You owe me $5.
Stay right where you are!
God, the car! Vivi, call the police!
If my father catches us, he'll kill us!
No, he'll kill me.
Am I going to see you tomorrow night?
Yeah, of course. You don't think your dad really called the cops, do you?
Yeah, I'm sure he did.
He'd really have me handcuffed and thrown in the back of a cop car?
No, he'd have you beaten and dragged first.
- Okay, then I'm going to go. - Okay.
- Bye - Bye.
Billy Brubaker steps in...
still looking for his first hit.
Sometimes you need a little sunshine to help break the ice.
Safe!
Billy Brubaker has just gotten his first hit of the Cape League season.
Now he's grabbing the ball out of Seaver's hand as a keepsake.
The A's visit the Yarmouth-Dennis Red Sox today, and before the game...
Billy Brubaker told me it's nice to finally have a batting average.
Bru's average is climbing every day now.
All the way up now to .268.
The hometown lefty, Ryan Dunne, continues his Jekyll-and-Hyde ways.
Strike three!
You are out of there!
Give me the ball.
All right! Way to go!
I'm proud of you guys. You're making me look good out there.
Ryan, you get to start Saturday against Hyannis.
You know what they say about us lefties?
The Earth's gravitational force is in our favor. It makes our pitches dance.
Dunne is going to get lit up.
Lawn boy.
Hope you're ready.
For what?
Hyannis. It's the best lineup in the League. You got two guys batting over .400.
Both of them first rounders, solid gold bonus babies.
Yeah. So?
So everyone in that lineup can take your yard.
Every scout in the country is going to be there.
I'd think twice before inviting the friends. It could get embarrassing.
Come on, man.
There you go.
I'm starting against Hyannis on Saturday.
They got two first rounders that tear the cover off the ball.
- What inning should I show up for? - What?
I should probably get there pretty early, right?
Hey, man, what's that supposed to mean?
I'm just trying to figure out what inning you'll self-destruct.
I want to be there for that.
Why aren't you behind me?
I'm behind you. Everyone is behind you, except you.
Just because you didn't have what it takes...
I didn't have it! I never had it, but you do.
You got a bag full of talent and a head full of crap.
Ever since Mom died, you think the world owes you something.
Bullshit! You've been given this gift.
You just piss it away.
I'm tired of this shit.
- Hi. - Hey.
I'm sorry it's so late.
I just really needed to see you.
I told you I couldn't see you tonight.
I know. I got this fight with my brother and I'm just feeling a little spun.
Hey. I'm Chris Hunt.
Tenley!
I am...
Ryan, the gardener's son. Why are you here at this time of night?
It's late. My dad had asked me to...
Come in, have a beer.
- You know my daughter Tenley, I believe. - Yes, sir.
So Ryan, you were about to tell us why you stopped by.
My dad asked me to check on the hydrangeas.
He was worried that they weren't blooming.
So you work for Rand?
Ryan and his father do splendid landscaping.
I cut the grass.
I really have to go. Thank you.
I'll see him out.
Son of a bitch!
What the fuck was I thinking? This is crazy!
I'm about to pitch the biggest game of my life.
- I know you are. And you're going to be great. - Bullshit!
His name is Chris Hunt. We decided not to see each other this summer.
My father invited him to play golf without asking me.
Really? lf you would be asked, would you say Ryan would love to play croquet tennis...
or maybe have martinis at the Yacht Club?
I haven't really told my parents about you.
And you didn't tell me about Chris.
I told Chris I needed to take this summer off.
Everybody is pressuring me. My father is pushing me to go to San Francisco.
I just wanted to do nothing for the summer.
Yeah.
And I'm the nothing you picked.
- Ryan, listen to me. - No.
Let's go back to: I'm the guy who cuts your father's grass.
Everybody is more comfortable that way.
That's not fair. Ryan, I'm sorry.
Hey, Miles.
That is unhealthy.
Can we not do this again?
Domo, don't you think that's unhealthy?
You think all sex is unhealthy. Never mind.
What I'm saying is, Miles, these women are too big to be fooling with.
I'm afraid in the heat of passion one of them will roll over on you. Squash you dead.
Ryan, hold up a second.
Did you go over the lineup?
The number four and number five batters are red-hot.
The four guy, he jumps on the first pitch and five sits on breaking stuff.
You know, I was a pitcher at Florida State for three years.
I had a cup of coffee with the Twins. Half a cup.
When you're a pitcher you got to pray that your stuff will show up.
Then one day you have this moment where it all just arrives.
Everything clicks.
Command, control, velocity. You feel invincible.
You'll spend many nights out there looking for it.
But once you've found it, just once, it's yours.
You have it inside you, and you know you have it.
It gives you the strength to go out there night after night...
and face those sons of bitches.
Holding your breath underwater and go-cart racing will never be Olympic events.
Why not?
Go get them. You're wicked awesome. Ry in the game tonight, baby.
Wait!
What if I cut my left arm off?
Do you think they'd let me compete in the Special Olympics?
I'd really love to win a medal.
Pete, why don't you go sit by the garbage and think about what you just said, okay?
You need to go, bud. That's messed up, Pete.
Hey, fish girl, get out of here.
Go. Get out of here. Take a hike.
Still scoreless as the Hyannis Mets come to bat in the top of the fourth.
Say, Dick, what do you make of this kid, Dunne?
- Good fast ball, bad mechanics. - But there's something about him.
He's throwing that heavy ball and a heavy ball ain't going to find many bats.
- I'll see you tomorrow. - Yeah, you will.
One down now. Come on, boys.
The Mets have one out in the fourth, with a runner on first.
Line drive. Great stab by Robin!
There's the throw to first. It's a double play!
That a boy. Here you go.
Luck don't last forever, lawn boy.
It's all right, man. It's all right. Stay focused.
Ryan Dunne's in a bit of a jam here in the sixth.
I don't believe he and the catcher, Brubaker are seeing eye-to-eye on pitch selection.
Just outside. Ball four.
Come on, blue, what was that?
Doyle trots to first, and that will load them up.
Get off your knees, man, you're blowing the game.
Did you say something, son?
No, sir, he didn't. Come on, Ry.
This is the kind of situation where Dunne has become undone in the past.
I'm just trying to figure out what inning you'll self-destruct.
Fastball plunks him in the back.
One big mistake.
Time.
Does his wife know he's screwing us?
Let's not have a meltdown out here.
- It's me. - What?
I don't think he appreciates me farting in his face all night.
First, it was accidental. Now I'm trying to make him cry.
I just dropped a bomb back there and I'm pretty sure I just poo-pooed in my panties.
All right. Bear down.
Right now, we're playing catch, all right? Just play catch. Come on now.
Dunne trying to regain his composure.
One run already in, and the bases are still loaded with one out here in the sixth.
And there's a wild pitch.
One runner scores and here comes Doyle, all the way from second.
- Safe. He's safe. - Come on!
Somebody put a quarter in the merry-go-round.
You got more than that, son. I'm telling you right now.
What began as a pitchers' duel turned into a rout...
as the A's fall to the Hyannis Mets, 8 to nothing.
There he is. Can you sign this?
Thank you.
Ryan, this is Hugh Alexander. He's the scout for the Phillies.
That's good stuff out there. You stay focused now.
Thank you.
They need to see you pitch again, they're interested in you. He told me.
I'm in the bullpen from here out...
next to Calvin Knight who's the best closer in the League.
That ump, he had it in for you.
You deserve better.
Thanks, Dad.
So I don't think I'll even show up for the last couple of games.
What?
Come on. Every scout was all over that Hyannis kid who hit the slam off me.
Yeah, he'll be getting a wicked big check come spring.
Yeah, I'm going to get a check, too.
About $70 for cutting grass at Chatham Elementary.
Come on, Ry. I think you're a really good pitcher.
What you think don't mean shit.
What?
All that matters is making it, getting signed and cashing a check.
Right now I'm lucky...
if some scrub team in Podunk lets me pitch batting practice for the next couple of season.
You're wrong.
Bullshit! That's all that matters.
It's not bullshit. What matters is that some of us would say you've already made it.
Some of us who've been there for you...
who drove to Boston College to see you pitch and went to Framingham state,...
and sat at your mom's wake with you.
And cleaned you up behind the Oasis when you couldn't pick yourself up out off ground.
And who let you live with me when you and your old man were at it.
Yeah, we matter. I matter. You bet your ass what I think matters.
I didn't miss one game, Ry.
Not one game.
And I'm proud as hell you've done what you've done.
When you hit that mound, I keep from crying,...
thinking about what we've been through. Me, and him, and your father, and Mike.
None of us has missed a game.
This ain't just about a paycheck, Ry.
It's about having pride in what you do.
Because I do.
- All right, Auggie. - No, Pete.
If Podunk invites you you're gonna go.
And I'm going too, and Pete's coming. Right, Pete?
Yeah, I'll go.
To Podunk.
- Come on. - To Podunk.
I love you, man. You're my best friend.
I love you, too, Pete. Pete's our best friend, too.
I'm starting to like this girl.
Girl looks like that and cuts your grass, what else do you need?
She could have beers in a cooler hanging from her neck, but that's just me.
Get out there, son.
My parents are having a party tonight.
What?
My parents are having a party tonight and you should come.
Oh, yeah. Me and your dad are real tight.
I told him about us. He was the one that insisted that you come.
I told Chris, too. He left last night.
I got creamed by Hyannis last night.
Yeah, Katie said. You and the umpire. I'm sorry.
That's okay. I'm out of the starting rotation.
I mean, I'll pitch some relief, but it's kind of over.
Listen. I did everything wrong with us. I should have told you about Chris.
And this war with my father has been going on for four years...
and it's finally out of control.
Forget it.
No. I was confused and I dragged you into the middle of my mess.
You're the only one who really cares about what I want.
Thank you.
The summer is almost over...
and the one thing I'm not confused about is that I want to see you.
I don't have a game tonight.
Come anytime after 5:00. The party goes all night.
I'll try.
Don't forget to do the trim, okay?
Yeah, and I'll make sure to mow the flower bed.
If I can find the bird feeder, I guess I'll mow that, too.
That's funny. That's very funny.
Come here.
If this party gets too boring, and I can tell right now that it won't...
the team is having this party at the Oasis.
Tenley Parrish. I haven't seen you in years. Look at you!
Excuse me. I'll meet you at the bar.
The last time I saw you, you had just gotten back from Europe.
Beer, please.
Hey, Ryan.
Hey, Katie. It's nice to see you out of your mascot uniforms.
The mascot search is over. Nobody gets it.
I quit.
Don't quit. You just have to figure out the true spirit of Chatham.
Trust your heart on this one.
Hello, Ryan.
I'm glad you came. You look very nice tonight.
Thank you, Mrs. Parrish.
Make yourself at home.
Hey, Ryan. Glad you could make it. How are you?
- Walk with me, will you? - Yes, sir.
I need you to understand something.
I know this is difficult, but let's be realistic.
We both know this little fling you're having is going to be over by Labor Day anyway.
So, I need your help.
I want Tenley to focus on her future.
Alone.
I've known your father a long time. He's a good man.
What does my dad have to do with this?
I don't want to see anybody get hurt. But you've stepped over a boundary here, son.
A boundary? What boundary?
You know damn well what the boundaries are here. They're as old as Chatham itself.
What are you trying to tell me?
Along with a number of my friends...
I'd have to take a good hard look at our arrangements with your father.
What?
- Ryan, I'm thinking of you here. - Yeah.
And I'm thinking of you, Rand, when I say you can take this lawn job...
and shove it up your ass.
He'll be here tomorrow. I guarantee.
I'll be right back.
Where are you going?
Just meet me tomorrow night at the field after the game.
Rand Parrish said that?
Sometimes parents get too involved and say stuff they don't mean.
Forget about it. You were probably right about Tenley.
I was really in the bag the other night.
I said some dumb things.
The right girl, family, last you forever.
Your mother used to say the reason the Indian rain dance worked...
is because they wouldn't stop dancing until it rained.
Every time it rained, she'd say that.
Yeah. I remember.
Stay at it.
You're a good kid, a good ball player.
Baseball might be a career for you.
I would never.
Come on, Dale. Giddy up.
- Where are you going? - To get a better view.
Come on, Tenley. Are you staying in Chatham?
Or if I get a tryout somewhere, are you going to follow me around?
You're going to San Francisco.
If I don't like the job, maybe I'll just go to graduate school.
You can go to grad school anywhere.
One, two, four!
- Ladies, Chatham's finest. - All right.
Our pride and joy.
I'm ever honored!
Thank you, my prince.
Night-night.
Careful up there, you two.
You're not listening to me. My father won't pay for grad school in architecture.
So what? You can get loans.
You don't understand.
Understand what, being broke? I understand.
- No. - What?
Doing something you love? I understand.
I love standing on that mound with a baseball in my hand...
staring at a guy holding a club 60 feet away...
knowing that he can't touch me.
It is the only place in the world where I feel powerful.
Shit! I'll probably end up cutting grass.
- Why are you so scared? - Scared of what?
Of everything. Success. Love.
You say you love being out on that mound. Why would you ever settle for cutting grass?
Wait a second, who's scared? I can't control my career, you can.
If you love architecture so much,...
why are you going to settle for the life your daddy set up for you?
What do you want me to do?
Get on a plane. Go to San Francisco.
- What? - This is never...
Shit!
Why did you lock the door?
Get down here!
Van Leemer and Lauren are still locked upstairs!
I got them! Get out!
Get out of here!
- Are you okay? - Yeah, I'm okay.
A's Press Box set ablaze.
"Tenley Parrish, daughter of Rand and Victoria Parrish...
and A's pitcher, Ryan Dunne...
watched firemen extinguish a blaze...
that engulfed the new Veterans Field press box last night."
Thank you. Congratulations, your humiliation of this family is complete.
We had nothing to do with starting that fire.
You were there. It's all part of this goddamn situation.
This kid is going to end up back here cutting grass with his old man guaranteed!
Who are you to judge what he does with his life?
Ryan is going to do whatever it takes to make it in baseball!
Fine, go with him. Go with him, then.
He doesn't want me to go with him!
I'm going to San Francisco to work for Uncle Richard.
Aren't you happy, Dad? You win, okay?
Why stop with the press box?
If you're going to start fires, why don't you burn down Main Street?
The League commissioner wanted to call this game off.
I had to convince her that to penalize the rest of the team...
for the stupidity of a couple of knuckleheads would be unfair.
But Robin and Van Leemer, they're ghosts.
Ghosts!
I packed their asses on the bus this morning.
Which means we finish the regular season and go into the playoffs...
without our number one pitcher and our starting shortstop.
Look at me when I'm talking to you, goddamn it!
Tomorrow at 4:00 p.m. Dunne...
you've got the freshest arm. You get to start tomorrow.
Now get the hell out of my sight, I'm sick of looking at you. Move.
Sean, I thought I asked you not to park in the driveway?
I just came by to give you a final bill.
A final bill? What about the fall? We've got leaves and...
John Kroft's crew does good work. I'll put him in touch.
Now wait a minute. Sean. What are you doing?
My boy told me what you said.
Pride isn't exclusive to you people on Shore Road, Mr. Parrish.
Good day.
Shit.
Come in.
I've been waiting for you.
Come on in. Sit down.
Come on, don't be bashful.
Let's talk.
Baseball is a game full of legends and lore.
I'm just another baseball legend, Domo.
I know you've heard some stories about me.
Some of them are true.
You can tell your own stories.
But I can help you with your baseball career.
I'm real good with ball players.
Really?
See the basket at the end of the bed?
Yes.
Hand me the cucumber.
Domo! Domo! Domo!
- It was gone. - The whole thing?
No way. An entire cucumber?
I swear, it was like Guinness Book of Records type stuff.
I'm happy for you, kid.
Bru, what's wrong, man?
I was there for lunch today.
She made me a cucumber salad.
- Hey. - Hey.
I'm...I'm starting tomorrow.
Yeah, I heard. Falmouth, right? Good luck.
Every scout in the League is goin' to be there expecting to see Van Leemer versus Huber.
I know. You're going to pitch a great game and get discovered.
I'm scared, Mike.
This is it.
You'll be fine, just pitch your game.
What's my game?
You're really asking me?
- You're really asking me. - Come on, Mike.
Sit down.
Hit your spots. Don't try to blow fastballs by every guy that gets in the box.
But I can throw way over 90.
Everybody in the minor league system can throw 90-plus. So what?
When is the last time Greg Maddux threw 95?
- I want to be intimidating. - Come on.
Wouldn't you rather be rich?
You are so stubborn. You're just like Mom: bullheaded.
You place your fastball, throw your curves for strikes.
You're dangerous, Ryan.
You are. You're as good as any of those guys out there.
Come on.
Believe in yourself.
Mom was pretty stubborn.
She made me drive her to that game you pitched against UMass.
She was sick as a dog.
Yeah, she never missed a game back then.
She hasn't missed one since.
Come on, I'll buy you a beer.
She's so fat, if she wore high heels, she'd strike oil.
What did the one fat chick say to the other fat chick?
- What? - Who cares? They're fat.
Fat chicks are cool.
They're like mopeds, fun to ride, just don't let your friends see you do it.
That's it. Hey, you know what? I've got something to say.
Listen up.
Excuse me.
Can I have everybody's attention for one minute?
There's something I need to say to everybody.
My name is Miles Dalrymple and I'm tired of living a lie.
I need it to be known that I like a big girl.
In fact, a large, zaftig, voluptuous, full-figured, big-boned...
massive-assive honey.
That is what really gets me going!
I like fat women and they like me! Anybody got a problem with that?
Big girls need love too, baby!
- Hi. - Hey.
Just like old times.
Yeah. I didn't see you in there.
I was home, packing.
I'm going to San Francisco tomorrow.
- Do you want to sit down? - Yeah.
I'm pitching tomorrow.
I had a huge fight with my father. I can't stay here with him.
About what?
You.
When are you leaving?
Tomorrow night.
- Just as well... - We're better off...
Let yourself be great tomorrow night.
I'm really going to miss you.
Ahoy, mateys. I am the true spirit of Chatham...
a drunken fisherman named Barnacle Barb.
I like to drink.
I like to fight.
I like to fall down in pools of my own vomit!
Tonight, the Chatham A's take on the Falmouth Commodores.
And a last-minute pitching change...
the A's will send Ryan Dunne to the mound.
Ryan!
Get them, tiger!
I'm proud as hell you've done what you've done.
Dunne replaces Eric Van Leemer...
who proved to be even more of a flamethrower than we imagined.
It's a good opportunity for the young lefty,...
after being banished to the bullpen by coach Schiffner.
That's good stuff out there. You stay focused now.
Swing and a miss. Strike three.
Number one, Ry dog!
Then one day you have this moment where it all just arrives. Everything clicks.
He struck him out.
2.6.
Got him on a good breaking ball.
I'm just trying to figure out what inning you'll self-destruct.
The question with Dunne has always been, can he keep it together for a whole ball game?
That's four K's for Dunne.
You are dangerous, Ryan.
You are. You're as good as any of those guys out there.
One big mistake.
Swing and a miss. He got him. That's five strikeouts for Dunne.
In the middle of the third, Falmouth is still looking for its first hit.
I want to stop by the stadium.
- We really don't have time, Tenley. - Just for a minute, okay?
Goose eggs on the board through seven, but the real story is Ryan Dunne.
You might want to stay awake for this. Ryan has got a no-no going.
Two outs here in the top of the eighth.
There's a little looper in the short right field, looks like...
No! Domo makes a circus catch. What a grab!
All right! Way to go, Domo!
The A's second baseman made a spectacular catch.
And the Commodores go down in the eighth.
Wouldn't you know it, the guy who makes the great play in the field...
now comes in to lead off for his team at bat in the last of the eighth inning.
Get on now. Make them pitch to you.
Mickey "Domo" Dominguez stands in against Huber.
There's a liner in the right. Base hit!
The A's have the lead-off runner on in the eighth.
The way these two pitchers are going, one run may do it tonight.
On deck for the A's is Billy Brubaker, who's been hot of late.
Bru's average is up to .292 now.
There's a line drive into left and it's sinking fast.
McBride can't get it. It's rolling all the way to the fence.
Domo is going to score easily. Brubaker is heading to third.
He's being waved around.
Come on, Bru!
He's safe!
Inside-the-park homer for Billy Brubaker. And the A's take a two-run lead here in the eighth.
Come on now, get up!
Ryan Dunne will take the mound in the ninth with a two-run cushion...
and three outs to go to complete his masterpiece.
Be right back.
Mullin stands in the lead off with Falmouth in the ninth.
He's already accounted for two of Dunne's ten strikeouts.
Strike one call.
I just clocked him at 93 mph in the ninth and he's getting stronger.
Fastball has got some good velo, his curve ball shows depth and best of all...
he's a lefty.
What is this kid's name, anyway?
Dunne. That's Ryan Dunne.
- Hi. - Hi.
Barnacle Barb is a big hit.
I thought you were gone.
I am. I just came to say goodbye.
I don't think he is going to be able to hear you. He's got a no-hitter going.
What's a no-hitter?
You can't talk about it. It will jinx it.
Let yourself be great.
Here's the 0-1 pitch.
Swing and a miss. Strike two.
I just got him at 95. That can't be right.
It's not. I got 96.
Swing and a miss. Strike three.
Dunne pulls the string on another off-speed breaking ball.
One up, one down. That's 11 strikeouts for the hometown left-hander.
Heaven is number 11! Two more to go, Ryan!
Two more! Come on!
- Bye. - Bye.
Two outs to go.
And now the crowd is on its feet.
We're really witnessing something special here tonight.
Allow yourself to succeed.
You want big rewards?
You've got to take big risks.
Bru!
Time.
What's up? What's going on? You okay?
I love her.
Okay, I love her, too, but let's get two more outs, okay?
Come on, kid, get up!
Knight, wake up man. Get out here!
- Finish it, Calvin. - Go on out.
Auggie, start the car!
He said start the car.
Get the cooler. Start the car.
All right, let's start the car!
Dude, what are you doing?
A no-hitter in the Cape League won't even be in The Globe tomorrow.
The right girl, that will last you forever.
Besides, Knight's the best closer in the League. He's going to finish this.
Good morning, sunshine.
Fatty here can't touch a slider...
and my man on deck is a sucker for an inside curve. Enjoy!
Everything all right, fellas?
- He loves her. - That's great.
- Thanks. - You're welcome.
- I love her. - We know.
Hey, Ryan. You might want to go this way.
Go get her!
This is the damnedest thing I've seen in 50 years of broadcasting.
Ryan Dunne is taking himself out of the game with two outs to go for a no-hitter.
Ryan, where are we going?
- I love her. - Me, too!
Who?
- Where? - To the airport.
Tenley!
- I love her. - What?
I mean, you.
- I love you. - I love you.
I need to know we are going to be together. Please don't go to San Francisco.
I don't want to go to San Francisco.
Then stay. You can go back to school.
Knight winds and delivers...
What happened with the no-hitter?
Allen swings at it. It's all over.
He finished it! You guys pitched a no-hitter!
I found it. I've just pitched the game of my life.
Let's be together.
I don't know where. Probably...
Batavia, New York. It's up around Buffalo.
The Phillies have a Single A team there called the Batavia Muckdogs.
- Muckdogs? - Yeah.
Mr. Alexander, didn't Ryan earn a little money tonight?
Yeah, he sure did.
In fact, Ryan, I'd like to make you an offer to play for a Phillies' farm club...
complete with a guaranteed $50,000 signing bonus.
75.
I beg your pardon?
$75,000 sounds about right.
- That would do the trick? - Yeah!
Done. Congratulations.
To the Muckdogs!
The Phillies are going to bring in the young left-hander...
the rookie just brought up from the minor league, Ryan Dunne.
Dunne was just called up this week from Scranton.
- What's going on over here? - Man, he's in.
- He looks good! - That's good.
...is none other than the superstar of the Reds, Ken Griffey, Jr.
The rookie left-hander Dunne looks in to his veteran catcher for the sign.
And shakes off the sign. Now he agrees, he's got the one he wants.
And here's the pitch on the way.
Swings! And that one is hit deep into right center field and it is gone.
A homerun for Ken Griffey, Jr.
To the first of many.
Welcome to the show, Ryan Dunne.
Subtitled by meo.