1 00:00:02,280 --> 00:00:04,520 What do you think you're doing? 2 00:00:04,560 --> 00:00:09,560 Having a good read. You've got no right! Hey, little kiddies love you. 3 00:00:09,600 --> 00:00:13,800 No, they don't. You've seen their letters, they're polite, that's all. 4 00:00:13,840 --> 00:00:16,480 Must feel like they're writing to a stranger. 5 00:00:16,520 --> 00:00:18,000 You are a psychopath. 6 00:00:18,040 --> 00:00:21,400 And you are cruel and you are spiteful! 7 00:00:21,440 --> 00:00:26,040 You have to take her on yourself. Oh, yeah(!) I can just see that(!) 8 00:00:26,080 --> 00:00:28,920 Me, a 50-year-old woman, fighting Michelle dockley?! 9 00:00:28,960 --> 00:00:32,240 So, what are you in here for anyway? Nicking gobstoppers? 10 00:00:32,280 --> 00:00:34,280 Triple murder. Do you want to break? 11 00:00:34,320 --> 00:00:40,680 You can have another baby. Another baby? But how? I'm in here, ain't I? 12 00:00:40,720 --> 00:00:44,400 Got any stash? No, I've got some rollies, if you want one. 13 00:00:47,840 --> 00:00:49,400 I'd like to take your word for it, 14 00:00:49,440 --> 00:00:53,440 but... i think we're going to have to do a little strip search. 15 00:00:53,480 --> 00:00:56,600 Argh! Argh! Ooh! Argh! 16 00:01:39,920 --> 00:01:45,000 Morning, ladies. Another great day in larkhall, eh, mr McAllister? 17 00:01:45,040 --> 00:01:47,760 Something like that, Denny. 18 00:01:47,800 --> 00:01:51,760 Settled in, have you? Ace, ta. Settle in dead easy, I do. 19 00:01:51,800 --> 00:01:53,080 Ah, good. 20 00:01:53,120 --> 00:01:56,680 Well, I hope Denny will show you the ropes. Yeah, no problem. 21 00:01:56,720 --> 00:01:59,560 With crystal down the block, it's just the two of you, so... 22 00:01:59,600 --> 00:02:03,040 Luxury, innit? Well, like I said, Denny will show you what's what, 23 00:02:03,080 --> 00:02:06,856 but if you have any problems or anything you want to know about, just give me a shout, all right? 24 00:02:06,880 --> 00:02:08,000 Yeah. Thanks. 25 00:02:11,960 --> 00:02:13,720 He seems all right. 26 00:02:13,760 --> 00:02:16,000 Yeah, for a screw. 27 00:02:16,040 --> 00:02:18,640 You've got to watch the lot of them. 28 00:02:18,680 --> 00:02:21,120 Can't trust them. Can't you? 29 00:02:21,160 --> 00:02:24,200 Won't think twice about doing you over when they feel like it. 30 00:02:26,920 --> 00:02:29,840 But hey, stick with me, you'll be fine. 31 00:02:33,880 --> 00:02:36,920 Anyway, er... you can take care of yourself, can't you, 32 00:02:36,960 --> 00:02:38,680 being banged up for triple murder? 33 00:02:54,720 --> 00:02:58,120 Morning, Julies. Morning, mr McAllister. Morning, mr McAllister. 34 00:03:00,400 --> 00:03:03,400 Here, I bet his tackle's all in working order. 35 00:03:06,720 --> 00:03:08,080 What? You mean...? 36 00:03:09,520 --> 00:03:13,480 Why not? Any kid of his would be a right dazzler. 37 00:03:13,520 --> 00:03:16,320 Let's face it, you wouldn't kick him out of bed now, would you? 38 00:03:16,360 --> 00:03:19,200 That's only cos I'd never get him into bed in the first place. 39 00:03:19,240 --> 00:03:22,200 In case you've forgotten, he's a bleeding screw. Yeah, come on, ju. 40 00:03:22,240 --> 00:03:25,760 Let's not be negative. So there's a couple of obstacles. 41 00:03:25,800 --> 00:03:28,520 You've just got to get over them. 42 00:03:28,560 --> 00:03:31,960 Or in this case, underneath them. 43 00:03:33,160 --> 00:03:35,760 Well, if you ask me, with one arm in a sling, 44 00:03:35,800 --> 00:03:38,160 dockley should be half as much trouble. 45 00:03:38,200 --> 00:03:40,120 So, as far as you're concerned, Sylvia, 46 00:03:40,160 --> 00:03:43,000 we should just wait for her arm to heal and forget how it happened? 47 00:03:43,040 --> 00:03:47,680 Well, she said she fell. And you believe that? Nah. 48 00:03:47,720 --> 00:03:50,560 Well, there must be a dozen women here who've got a score to 49 00:03:50,600 --> 00:03:52,360 settle with dockley. 50 00:03:52,400 --> 00:03:56,200 Maybe now she'll think twice about throwing her wait around again. 51 00:03:56,240 --> 00:04:00,560 And that's what you'll tell the inquiry when someone gets murdered? 52 00:04:00,600 --> 00:04:02,720 I don't care if dockley had it coming or not. 53 00:04:02,760 --> 00:04:04,320 I want to know who attacked her. 54 00:04:27,040 --> 00:04:29,720 Hey! Oh! It's all right. I don't want no trouble. 55 00:04:29,760 --> 00:04:33,120 I've seen what you can do. Oh, for god's sake, Yvonne, stop it! 56 00:04:33,160 --> 00:04:35,800 I'm only having a laugh, babs. It's not funny. 57 00:04:35,840 --> 00:04:39,240 I can't believe what I did. No! Neither can the rest of us. 58 00:04:39,280 --> 00:04:41,960 But the fact is, you did it and dockley deserved it. 59 00:04:42,000 --> 00:04:43,760 I acted like an animal. 60 00:04:43,800 --> 00:04:47,280 Well, that's nothing special in here, love. Welcome to the zoo. 61 00:04:51,000 --> 00:04:52,960 So, how'd it happen, then? 62 00:04:53,000 --> 00:04:57,080 What? What, she asks! Killing three people. 63 00:04:57,120 --> 00:05:01,080 No big deal. No big deal, offing three people? 64 00:05:01,120 --> 00:05:05,320 I worked on a supermarket fish counter. The fish counter? 65 00:05:05,360 --> 00:05:09,520 My boss was this fat bitch, always on at me. 66 00:05:09,560 --> 00:05:13,040 Do this! Get that! Why haven't you done such and such? 67 00:05:13,080 --> 00:05:15,400 Well, one day when we shut up shop, 68 00:05:15,440 --> 00:05:18,160 I forgot to stick these oysters in the fridge. 69 00:05:18,200 --> 00:05:21,320 Next morning, she finds them and of course, they've gone off. 70 00:05:21,360 --> 00:05:26,360 She goes off like a moon rocket and calls me a worthless shitwhip. 71 00:05:26,400 --> 00:05:28,920 Really has a go. You know. 72 00:05:28,960 --> 00:05:30,360 Cow! 73 00:05:32,160 --> 00:05:35,840 Didn't stop till she made me cry. Anyway... 74 00:05:37,240 --> 00:05:39,640 ..She sent me to Chuck the oysters away, 75 00:05:39,680 --> 00:05:42,320 so I decided I was going to get some payback. 76 00:05:42,360 --> 00:05:43,480 No way, man! 77 00:05:43,520 --> 00:05:48,480 It's true. I poured the bad juice over another tray of fresh ones. 78 00:05:48,520 --> 00:05:51,680 I thought I'd show her who was a shitwhip. 79 00:05:51,720 --> 00:05:55,040 I reckoned the oysters would give a few people the squits 80 00:05:55,080 --> 00:05:59,080 and word would get back to environmental health. Nice one. 81 00:05:59,120 --> 00:06:01,760 This old couple and the pregnant woman, 82 00:06:01,800 --> 00:06:05,000 though, didn't just get the squits, did they? 83 00:06:05,040 --> 00:06:07,840 It wasn't just environmental health that came calling. 84 00:06:09,280 --> 00:06:12,600 They brought the coppers with them. The oysters did that? 85 00:06:12,640 --> 00:06:13,880 Yeah. 86 00:06:15,920 --> 00:06:18,800 Anyway, all this talk about food's got me famished. 87 00:06:18,840 --> 00:06:20,640 What's the brekkie like round here? 88 00:06:23,160 --> 00:06:26,080 Not bad, is it? What? Didn't they feed you on remand? 89 00:06:26,120 --> 00:06:28,720 Yeah, but you get more on a bird table. 90 00:06:28,760 --> 00:06:30,760 Well, I suppose it ain't that bad in here. 91 00:06:30,800 --> 00:06:34,000 Watch out for the oysters though! 92 00:06:34,040 --> 00:06:35,200 You're all right, you. 93 00:06:35,240 --> 00:06:37,240 Thanks. 94 00:06:37,280 --> 00:06:40,440 I reckon we're going to have a laugh in here, you and me. 95 00:06:40,480 --> 00:06:42,320 Yeah, I reckon we will. 96 00:06:43,960 --> 00:06:45,600 Listen, if you're interested, me 97 00:06:45,640 --> 00:06:48,080 and some of the other girls, we've got this scam going on. 98 00:06:48,120 --> 00:06:49,480 Like what? 99 00:06:49,520 --> 00:06:51,000 That sort. 100 00:06:51,040 --> 00:06:53,520 How? You'll never guess. 101 00:06:53,560 --> 00:06:55,960 It's telephone sex lines. 102 00:06:56,000 --> 00:06:58,920 You're pulling my chain! No, honest. 103 00:06:58,960 --> 00:07:02,120 It's titchy little mobile phones and they don't ring, they vibrate. 104 00:07:02,160 --> 00:07:03,640 The screws know sod all about them. 105 00:07:03,680 --> 00:07:05,760 All's you've got to do is talk dirty. 106 00:07:18,920 --> 00:07:21,600 Hey, shell. What happened to your arm? 107 00:07:21,640 --> 00:07:25,600 Wasn't watching where I was going, was I? Slipped and fell. Oh, right. 108 00:07:25,640 --> 00:07:27,400 Cos if anybody touched you, you know 109 00:07:27,440 --> 00:07:31,360 I'd come fix them for you, don't you? Yeah. Thanks. 110 00:07:47,600 --> 00:07:49,680 Can I have everyone's attention, please? 111 00:07:53,200 --> 00:07:55,000 Right. 112 00:07:55,040 --> 00:07:57,640 I know some of you think you're hard enough to sort out any 113 00:07:57,680 --> 00:08:00,600 problems you might have with a bit of aggro. 114 00:08:00,640 --> 00:08:03,280 On the outside, that's your business. 115 00:08:03,320 --> 00:08:07,320 But there is no room for violence in larkhall. I'm not having it! 116 00:08:07,360 --> 00:08:08,720 From any of you. 117 00:08:08,760 --> 00:08:10,400 Not on g wing. 118 00:08:13,280 --> 00:08:18,160 Now, someone's had a go at shell dockley and I want to know who. 119 00:08:25,920 --> 00:08:28,680 Take it easy, babs. No-one's going to grass on you. 120 00:08:30,360 --> 00:08:33,480 Well, keeping quiet's not going to do anybody any good. 121 00:08:36,880 --> 00:08:38,200 If anyone has information, 122 00:08:38,240 --> 00:08:40,520 they can pass it on to their personal officer. 123 00:08:44,080 --> 00:08:46,640 That won't be necessary, miss. 124 00:08:46,680 --> 00:08:48,800 I hit her. I did it. 125 00:08:51,800 --> 00:08:53,680 You?! 126 00:08:53,720 --> 00:08:57,160 I know it's hard to believe. I can hardly believe it myself. 127 00:08:57,200 --> 00:08:59,760 The old cow's barmy! 128 00:08:59,800 --> 00:09:02,840 I just fell over. No-one's laid a finger on me. 129 00:09:02,880 --> 00:09:05,960 You fell over? Honest, miss. I'm telling you. 130 00:09:06,000 --> 00:09:08,920 No-one's had a go at me. I'd tell you if they had, wouldn't I? 131 00:09:10,480 --> 00:09:12,000 Barbara? 132 00:09:12,040 --> 00:09:16,040 Oh, come on, miss. I wouldn't lie to you, you know that. 133 00:09:16,080 --> 00:09:18,480 And how's an old mare like that going to deck me?! 134 00:09:35,040 --> 00:09:38,200 Hey, listen, Yvonne. This is my mate, shaz. Hiya. 135 00:09:38,240 --> 00:09:41,600 She, er... she wants to get in on the phone lines. 136 00:09:41,640 --> 00:09:43,800 Why? Do you want to work a switchboard? 137 00:09:43,840 --> 00:09:46,680 No, she can talk dirty. I'm sure that's very nice for you after lock up, 138 00:09:46,720 --> 00:09:49,400 but I'm not into that sort of thing, Denny. No, listen, Yvonne... 139 00:09:49,440 --> 00:09:52,320 Look, I don't know what you're on about, all right, Denny? 140 00:09:57,040 --> 00:09:58,880 Shit! 141 00:09:58,920 --> 00:10:01,000 I'm taking me pants off now. 142 00:10:05,280 --> 00:10:06,840 Yeah, can you hear them? 143 00:10:09,680 --> 00:10:11,960 I'm completely naked now. 144 00:10:13,440 --> 00:10:15,040 Ooh, I wish you could see me. 145 00:10:16,800 --> 00:10:19,600 Right. Well, you just do your own thing. 146 00:10:23,600 --> 00:10:25,600 10p a minute and counting. 147 00:10:25,640 --> 00:10:27,600 You all right? 148 00:10:27,640 --> 00:10:32,160 No, I bloody well ain't. What's up? You two been mouthing off to anyone? 149 00:10:32,200 --> 00:10:34,440 How do you mean? About our nice little earner here. 150 00:10:34,480 --> 00:10:37,520 You don't need to worry about us. We know when we're on to a good thing. 151 00:10:37,560 --> 00:10:40,280 We wouldn't tell nobody. Well, Denny bleeding has. 152 00:10:40,320 --> 00:10:42,760 Oh, what, again? Who's she told this time? 153 00:10:42,800 --> 00:10:45,440 Who do you think? Her new little girlfriend. 154 00:10:45,480 --> 00:10:47,400 Both: Oh, bloody hell! 155 00:10:47,440 --> 00:10:49,720 If she's going to tell every girl she fancies... 156 00:10:49,760 --> 00:10:53,240 The whole wing's going to know. All we need is for the screws to find out about one phone 157 00:10:53,280 --> 00:10:56,680 and we'll all be stuffed. Oh, John, you've finished? 158 00:10:56,720 --> 00:10:59,560 Oh... well, call me again, yeah? 159 00:10:59,600 --> 00:11:02,720 I'll be here. Another satisfied customer? 160 00:11:02,760 --> 00:11:06,840 Can't get enough. How many times has he called you this week? He likes me. Can't help it. 161 00:11:06,880 --> 00:11:10,800 We've got quite a few regulars between us now. Good. 162 00:11:10,840 --> 00:11:15,160 Some of them are quite nice. Well, for... wankers? 163 00:11:15,200 --> 00:11:17,440 Both: Yeah. 164 00:11:21,360 --> 00:11:24,040 Nice one, eh? Where did you get that? 165 00:11:24,080 --> 00:11:26,840 Nightclub. Some bitch done me with a carpet knife. 166 00:11:26,880 --> 00:11:28,520 What had you done to her? 167 00:11:28,560 --> 00:11:32,160 Spilled her drink. What? She did that cos you spilled her drink? 168 00:11:32,200 --> 00:11:34,680 Well, I did spill it over her head. 169 00:11:34,720 --> 00:11:38,800 Shit! Don't forget a night out with you in a hurry, I bet! 170 00:11:38,840 --> 00:11:40,400 No way, man. 171 00:11:41,800 --> 00:11:44,400 You fancy one tonight? Night out? 172 00:11:46,200 --> 00:11:48,400 Yeah. Yeah, all right. 173 00:11:48,440 --> 00:11:51,880 What do you fancy? Pictures or a night in the pub? I mean it. 174 00:11:51,920 --> 00:11:56,320 Look, when I was in remand, someone showed me this trick. 175 00:11:57,760 --> 00:11:59,760 I could get out of here like that. 176 00:11:59,800 --> 00:12:01,240 Yeah(!) 177 00:12:01,280 --> 00:12:03,720 Only one way to prove it. 178 00:12:03,760 --> 00:12:06,240 Whispering 179 00:12:11,160 --> 00:12:14,960 everything all right, is it, Julies? What? Yeah. Course it is. 180 00:12:15,000 --> 00:12:20,400 Truth is, sir, we was just wondering. Oh, yeah? What about? 181 00:12:20,440 --> 00:12:24,720 It's funny, isn't it? I mean, just how much we see of you. 182 00:12:24,760 --> 00:12:27,840 Every day you're here, unlocking us in the morning, locking us 183 00:12:27,880 --> 00:12:31,800 up at night, but, well, we've never really got to know you, have we? 184 00:12:31,840 --> 00:12:34,440 We know you're a nice bloke and that. Oh, we know that. 185 00:12:34,480 --> 00:12:38,840 We know that. But we was just wondering about outside. 186 00:12:38,880 --> 00:12:41,880 Like, whether you had... A girlfriend? 187 00:12:41,920 --> 00:12:44,360 A girlfriend? Or something. 188 00:12:44,400 --> 00:12:46,120 No. 189 00:12:46,160 --> 00:12:47,760 Oh! Oh... 190 00:12:47,800 --> 00:12:52,120 Was there anything else? It'll be the hours, I expect. Yeah. 191 00:12:52,160 --> 00:12:55,480 I mean, not much chance to socialise when you work in a place like this. 192 00:12:55,520 --> 00:12:57,680 You ought to take time out to relax, sir. 193 00:12:57,720 --> 00:12:59,640 There's a lot of stress in your job, isn't there? 194 00:12:59,680 --> 00:13:03,320 Now, stress, ju, one of the biggest killers of modern times. 195 00:13:03,360 --> 00:13:07,160 Is this going somewhere, Julies? Cos if it isn't, I am. 196 00:13:07,200 --> 00:13:09,800 That reminds me, ju, I'll catch you later. 197 00:13:09,840 --> 00:13:11,200 Mr McAllister. 198 00:13:14,920 --> 00:13:17,680 I'm off, too. See, that's just what I mean. 199 00:13:17,720 --> 00:13:20,200 All this rushing around, mr McAllister. 200 00:13:20,240 --> 00:13:22,120 It's not good for your heart. 201 00:13:34,000 --> 00:13:36,720 Knocks on door 202 00:13:36,760 --> 00:13:39,200 what are you doing here? 203 00:13:39,240 --> 00:13:42,400 To tell you the truth, I don't really know. 204 00:13:42,440 --> 00:13:44,800 Piss off, then! 205 00:13:44,840 --> 00:13:47,280 I want to know why you did it. 206 00:13:47,320 --> 00:13:51,440 Why you did that today. Just be grateful I did. 207 00:13:51,480 --> 00:13:54,880 Anyway, I didn't do it for you. Well, thank you anyway. 208 00:13:58,040 --> 00:14:00,000 So, we're quits, yeah? 209 00:14:00,040 --> 00:14:03,360 Now, you keep out of my way and I'll keep out of yours. 210 00:14:03,400 --> 00:14:04,400 Deal? 211 00:14:12,560 --> 00:14:16,520 Sorry, Julie, I've got to go. What about kids, mr McAllister? 212 00:14:16,560 --> 00:14:19,320 You must want children. Yeah, one day, perhaps. 213 00:14:19,360 --> 00:14:22,400 Well, you know they say, modern day stress is having a terrible 214 00:14:22,440 --> 00:14:25,800 effect on the, you know, wotsit count. 215 00:14:25,840 --> 00:14:27,960 I'll bear it in mind. 216 00:14:28,000 --> 00:14:31,400 But right now, the only stress I've got to worry about, Julie, is you. 217 00:14:31,440 --> 00:14:35,360 I don't want to cause you no stress, mr McAllister. Just the opposite. 218 00:14:35,400 --> 00:14:38,520 I mean, watching your little boy or your little girl growing up, 219 00:14:38,560 --> 00:14:40,960 think how therapeutic that would be, especially 220 00:14:41,000 --> 00:14:43,440 if you could see them while you were at work. 221 00:14:43,480 --> 00:14:45,240 Julie, are you feeling all right? 222 00:14:45,280 --> 00:14:48,040 Oh, more than all right, mr McAllister. 223 00:14:48,080 --> 00:14:49,520 How about you? 224 00:14:49,560 --> 00:14:51,400 I'm not sure. 225 00:14:51,440 --> 00:14:54,680 Why don't you come with me and we'll see what we can do? 226 00:14:56,080 --> 00:14:59,600 Julie, I hope for once you are messing me around, 227 00:14:59,640 --> 00:15:01,320 otherwise you're in big trouble. 228 00:15:01,360 --> 00:15:02,720 What? 229 00:15:04,760 --> 00:15:06,560 Propositioning a prison officer? 230 00:15:08,600 --> 00:15:10,520 See what I mean? 231 00:15:10,560 --> 00:15:13,400 You're so serious, mr McAllister. 232 00:15:13,440 --> 00:15:16,080 You need to get yourself a sense of humour. 233 00:15:23,880 --> 00:15:25,760 I nearly got bloody done then! Blimey! 234 00:15:25,800 --> 00:15:27,360 He don't know what he's missing. 235 00:15:27,400 --> 00:15:30,480 Oh, maybe we should forget the whole idea. Oh, you don't mean that, ju. 236 00:15:30,520 --> 00:15:32,840 Not after the way you were looking at poor little 237 00:15:32,880 --> 00:15:37,480 Robbie at zandra's memorial service. Yeah, but it's hopeless, isn't it? Of course not. 238 00:15:40,240 --> 00:15:42,200 You've just got to put your trust in god. 239 00:15:52,440 --> 00:15:55,360 Choking 240 00:15:55,400 --> 00:15:57,280 what's the matter? 241 00:16:04,080 --> 00:16:06,280 I'll go and get the doctor. 242 00:16:08,800 --> 00:16:11,320 She laughs 243 00:16:11,360 --> 00:16:13,600 had you going then, didn't I? 244 00:16:13,640 --> 00:16:16,640 That's a caution! What for? Having a laugh? 245 00:16:20,160 --> 00:16:22,120 Possessing an unauthorised article. 246 00:16:23,480 --> 00:16:26,400 And you can wash it and all before it goes back! 247 00:16:30,080 --> 00:16:33,000 You're a total nutter, man! Oh, that was nothing. 248 00:16:46,720 --> 00:16:48,320 Uh! Oh, sorry! 249 00:16:48,360 --> 00:16:51,760 Didn't mean to startle you. No, it's all right. 250 00:16:51,800 --> 00:16:55,760 I just didn't hear you come in. Oh, you was in... Conversation. 251 00:16:59,200 --> 00:17:00,440 Oh, yeah. 252 00:17:00,480 --> 00:17:04,760 It's, um, Gillian, isn't it? Julie. Oh, I'm sorry. 253 00:17:04,800 --> 00:17:09,200 You're not a regular, are you? Me? Regular as clockwork. 254 00:17:09,240 --> 00:17:11,400 My mum used to set her alarm by me bowels. 255 00:17:12,640 --> 00:17:15,120 Is there something wrong, Julie? 256 00:17:15,160 --> 00:17:16,720 Wrong? 257 00:17:16,760 --> 00:17:19,360 As the chapel isn't a normal haunt of yours, 258 00:17:19,400 --> 00:17:22,160 I can only imagine you have a special reason for coming. 259 00:17:22,200 --> 00:17:23,720 Yeah, I have. It... 260 00:17:25,440 --> 00:17:27,320 It's a bit difficult. 261 00:17:27,360 --> 00:17:31,800 Don't worry. Whatever your problem, I'm your man. 262 00:17:31,840 --> 00:17:33,240 Oh! 263 00:17:46,440 --> 00:17:47,760 No go, then? 264 00:17:49,880 --> 00:17:52,680 That's the trouble with the bleeding church. 265 00:17:52,720 --> 00:17:55,360 If you ain't a virgin, they ain't interested. 266 00:17:55,400 --> 00:17:59,440 He ain't interested cos he's a vicar. He's a man! 267 00:17:59,480 --> 00:18:01,280 And the trouble is, ju, we are 268 00:18:01,320 --> 00:18:03,360 running out of them in here pretty quick. 269 00:18:07,560 --> 00:18:10,640 There's always... Mr fenner. 270 00:18:13,280 --> 00:18:14,720 Mr fenner? 271 00:18:16,120 --> 00:18:17,920 No, you're right. 272 00:18:17,960 --> 00:18:20,000 Even he probably wouldn't be interested. 273 00:18:20,040 --> 00:18:21,840 Not after that business with shell. 274 00:18:21,880 --> 00:18:25,320 So, that's that knocked on the head, then. Oh... 275 00:18:29,880 --> 00:18:32,680 Whiplash Wanda. What can I do for you today? 276 00:18:32,720 --> 00:18:34,240 Oh, hello, John. 277 00:18:38,000 --> 00:18:39,400 John! 278 00:18:56,800 --> 00:19:00,800 Come on, you. You'll have time to stand around and gawp later. 279 00:19:00,840 --> 00:19:04,480 Use your eyes, bitch! Now, come on! Come on! 280 00:19:04,520 --> 00:19:06,000 Let's have you! 281 00:19:06,040 --> 00:19:09,240 Move it! Hurry up! Some of us have homes to go to. 282 00:19:27,080 --> 00:19:30,720 What would be really nice is a picture of you, John. 283 00:19:33,200 --> 00:19:37,440 Oh, you would? Oh, that would be lovely. 284 00:19:37,480 --> 00:19:38,720 And, er... 285 00:19:38,760 --> 00:19:41,760 What if I were to send you a visiting order 286 00:19:41,800 --> 00:19:43,280 so you could come and visit me? 287 00:19:44,920 --> 00:19:46,880 Yeah, face-to-face. Would you like that? 288 00:19:49,040 --> 00:19:51,960 Oh, great! Well, hang on, I'll get your address. 289 00:19:52,000 --> 00:19:53,880 Yeah, pass us that. 290 00:19:53,920 --> 00:19:54,960 Come on. 291 00:19:55,000 --> 00:19:57,920 Hold on, hold on, it's just coming. Yeah, go on, then. 292 00:20:00,280 --> 00:20:03,040 Yeah. 293 00:20:04,600 --> 00:20:06,120 Got it. 294 00:20:06,160 --> 00:20:08,120 I can't wait! 295 00:20:08,160 --> 00:20:10,400 I'll see you soon, lover. 296 00:20:10,440 --> 00:20:11,920 Bye. Bye. 297 00:20:11,960 --> 00:20:15,760 Bloody hell, ju! Are you sure you know what you're doing? 298 00:20:15,800 --> 00:20:17,320 He's a man, isn't he? 299 00:20:17,360 --> 00:20:20,000 He'd be more up for it than either of your bright ideas. 300 00:20:20,040 --> 00:20:23,960 Well, course he will! He's a bleeding sad old pervert! 301 00:20:24,000 --> 00:20:27,120 That's unfair! John's always been really nice on the phone. 302 00:20:27,160 --> 00:20:30,800 It don't matter what he sounds like. He is a dirty old perv! 303 00:20:30,840 --> 00:20:32,920 Not necessarily. 304 00:20:32,960 --> 00:20:35,360 And anyway, I asked him to send me a picky, 305 00:20:35,400 --> 00:20:37,000 so I can see what he looks like. 306 00:20:37,040 --> 00:20:39,040 Yvonne will go ballistic if she finds out. 307 00:20:39,080 --> 00:20:41,360 Well, how's she going to know? 308 00:20:42,680 --> 00:20:44,600 Renee Williams? 309 00:20:44,640 --> 00:20:47,040 Sentenced to 18 months. 310 00:20:47,080 --> 00:20:49,640 Congratulations. You've won a car. 311 00:20:49,680 --> 00:20:52,320 Comedian, are we? This place fills me full of laughs. 312 00:20:55,960 --> 00:21:00,480 Any medical problems? Why don't you examine me to find out, darling? 313 00:21:00,520 --> 00:21:02,640 Any medical problems? 314 00:21:03,880 --> 00:21:05,280 No. 315 00:21:08,920 --> 00:21:12,280 Right, let's see what we've got in here. 316 00:21:12,320 --> 00:21:15,240 You'd better make sure no-one gets their frigging thieving 317 00:21:15,280 --> 00:21:17,120 fingers on that stuff! 318 00:21:17,160 --> 00:21:20,200 Don't worry, we keep all the thieves under lock and key. 319 00:21:20,240 --> 00:21:23,600 That's why you're here, in case you forgot. Who's the comedian now? 320 00:21:26,480 --> 00:21:29,720 Right, you spend the weekend in the reception dorm, 321 00:21:29,760 --> 00:21:31,920 then you'll be taken on to your wing on Monday. 322 00:21:31,960 --> 00:21:35,120 Dorm?! I'm not sleeping in any dorm! 323 00:21:35,160 --> 00:21:38,480 Yes, you are! She's all yours. 324 00:21:40,520 --> 00:21:43,600 Get your hands off me, you black... Hey! 325 00:21:43,640 --> 00:21:46,840 You got a problem? Cos you are really starting to piss me off! 326 00:22:09,640 --> 00:22:13,000 Are you sure this is going to work? I'm telling you, they did it in remand. 327 00:22:13,040 --> 00:22:15,720 We've just got to make sure there's enough paper in there 328 00:22:15,760 --> 00:22:17,040 and it's really tight. 329 00:22:17,080 --> 00:22:20,880 It's got to be worth a go anyway. I'm telling you! You watch. 330 00:22:24,160 --> 00:22:27,880 Here... It's been a long one today, Dominic. 331 00:22:27,920 --> 00:22:30,960 Another day, another dollar, Sylvia. 332 00:22:31,000 --> 00:22:34,720 Anyway, I suppose it was worthwhile coming in today to see madam 333 00:22:34,760 --> 00:22:36,600 make a fool of herself. 334 00:22:36,640 --> 00:22:39,720 She's got as much chance of finding out who clobbered 335 00:22:39,760 --> 00:22:42,160 shell dockley as finding lord lucan. 336 00:22:42,200 --> 00:22:43,800 All locked up! 337 00:22:45,320 --> 00:22:49,520 Love you! As if anyone cares who clocked her one. 338 00:22:49,560 --> 00:22:53,080 Let them fight it out amongst themselves, that's what I say. 339 00:22:53,120 --> 00:22:54,560 Shut up! 340 00:22:56,320 --> 00:22:58,320 Night. Night. 341 00:23:00,560 --> 00:23:02,400 Snores 342 00:23:11,000 --> 00:23:14,640 Muffled scream 343 00:23:14,680 --> 00:23:17,120 pack it in, or I'll shut you up for good! All right? 344 00:23:47,560 --> 00:23:50,840 They'll kill us if they find out! Who's going to see us to tell them? 345 00:23:53,360 --> 00:23:55,520 What are you going to do with those? 346 00:24:15,680 --> 00:24:17,440 That's it. That's the last one. 347 00:24:17,480 --> 00:24:20,160 This place is going to go up like a frigging bomb in the morning! 348 00:24:20,200 --> 00:24:21,320 Is this the biz or what? 349 00:24:22,400 --> 00:24:24,600 Giggling 350 00:24:54,080 --> 00:24:55,360 Door closes 351 00:24:55,400 --> 00:24:57,320 close call! Maybe we ought to get back. 352 00:24:57,360 --> 00:25:00,240 I've just got a bit of unfinished business to take care of. 353 00:25:04,760 --> 00:25:07,720 What are you doing? Something else I learned in remand. 354 00:25:07,760 --> 00:25:09,120 Watch and learn. 355 00:25:23,480 --> 00:25:26,840 Yeah, the visiting order's in the post. You should get it tomorrow. 356 00:25:28,680 --> 00:25:30,480 No, I can't wait either. 357 00:25:30,520 --> 00:25:32,800 I'll see you soon. Bye. 358 00:25:35,240 --> 00:25:36,960 So it's all systems go, then, is it? 359 00:25:39,080 --> 00:25:42,800 I'm sure John's the one, you know. How come?! 360 00:25:42,840 --> 00:25:45,400 Well, it's obvious, isn't it? 361 00:25:45,440 --> 00:25:48,440 There I am, no go with the chaplain or mr McAllister 362 00:25:48,480 --> 00:25:50,680 and then John phones up out of the blue. 363 00:25:50,720 --> 00:25:54,880 He's a punter, ju! All the same, he sounds nice. 364 00:25:54,920 --> 00:25:58,040 And what room have we got to go judging blokes that ring us 365 00:25:58,080 --> 00:25:59,480 up for a cheap thrill? 366 00:25:59,520 --> 00:26:04,440 Acres of it! We know what they're like! No, we don't. 367 00:26:04,480 --> 00:26:07,320 Maybe he's too shy to find himself a girlfriend. 368 00:26:07,360 --> 00:26:09,040 Oh! Well, you don't know! 369 00:26:09,080 --> 00:26:12,440 The only thing I don't know is how he's going to get you up 370 00:26:12,480 --> 00:26:15,160 the stick in the middle of the bleeding visiting room! 371 00:26:31,960 --> 00:26:35,400 She's going to go knobbing nuclear! That's the idea! 372 00:26:35,440 --> 00:26:39,680 I'd better clear this out so we don't get sussed in the morning. 373 00:26:39,720 --> 00:26:41,360 Wicked night, shaz. 374 00:26:41,400 --> 00:26:45,040 We're going to have a top notch, you and me, Denny. 375 00:27:15,160 --> 00:27:16,960 Screams 376 00:27:17,000 --> 00:27:19,280 oh! 377 00:27:19,320 --> 00:27:21,440 What the hell's going on?! 378 00:27:27,480 --> 00:27:30,120 Toilet flush 379 00:27:30,160 --> 00:27:32,440 oh, my god! 380 00:27:34,160 --> 00:27:37,040 Ju! Come and have a look! 381 00:27:43,960 --> 00:27:46,120 What the...? 382 00:27:46,160 --> 00:27:48,160 Oh, my lord! 383 00:27:48,200 --> 00:27:50,440 Scream 384 00:27:52,160 --> 00:27:54,960 mrs hollamby, you ought to come and see! 385 00:27:55,000 --> 00:27:57,080 Whatever now? 386 00:27:57,120 --> 00:27:59,400 Laughter 387 00:28:10,000 --> 00:28:12,840 So, does anybody want to explain? 388 00:28:17,040 --> 00:28:18,760 I don't think we can, ma'am. 389 00:28:18,800 --> 00:28:21,760 Well, let's suppose we're not dealing with poltergeists 390 00:28:21,800 --> 00:28:25,800 or gremlins. Let's suppose someone hasn't been doing their job properly! 391 00:28:25,840 --> 00:28:28,360 Then surely that's down to the night staff. 392 00:28:28,400 --> 00:28:30,680 Well, I'll be speaking to the night staff. 393 00:28:30,720 --> 00:28:33,120 But locking up prisoners is your responsibility 394 00:28:33,160 --> 00:28:36,080 and clearly last night, somebody wasn't locked up! 395 00:28:36,120 --> 00:28:38,480 I don't see how that's possible. 396 00:28:38,520 --> 00:28:40,720 Oh, so we're back to the phantom of larkhall! 397 00:28:43,400 --> 00:28:46,320 You were the senior officer on lock up last night, Sylvia. 398 00:28:46,360 --> 00:28:49,120 Did you make sure every cell was secure? 399 00:28:49,160 --> 00:28:50,800 I know how to do my job, ma'am! 400 00:28:50,840 --> 00:28:54,720 I didn't ask that. I asked if you did it! 401 00:28:54,760 --> 00:28:58,840 Yes, I did. Well, someone here's responsible for this mess! 402 00:29:06,760 --> 00:29:09,360 So, you up for it again tonight? What, going out? 403 00:29:09,400 --> 00:29:11,440 Screws are going to be harder than shit, man! 404 00:29:11,480 --> 00:29:13,320 Yeah, you're right. Besides... 405 00:29:13,360 --> 00:29:16,120 It's always the same old broken record, isn't it? 406 00:29:16,160 --> 00:29:19,480 Sylvia's fault, Sylvia's fault, Sylvia's fault. 407 00:29:19,520 --> 00:29:21,320 You were with me at lock up last night. 408 00:29:21,360 --> 00:29:23,920 If I did something wrong, you'd tell me what it was. 409 00:29:23,960 --> 00:29:27,160 You didn't do anything wrong, Sylvia. No, I didn't! 410 00:29:27,200 --> 00:29:31,440 And you two, you can put a stop to that! To what? Handling each other. 411 00:29:31,480 --> 00:29:35,400 It's disgusting. You're just jealous. That's enough of your lip! 412 00:29:35,440 --> 00:29:38,880 Not be so touchy-feely, banged up on the block, will you? 413 00:29:41,480 --> 00:29:43,760 You don't want to bother with what she says. 414 00:29:43,800 --> 00:29:47,520 Dried up old bag! Hey, shell. You're right, shaz. 415 00:29:47,560 --> 00:29:50,440 Trouble with hollamby is she ain't getting any. 416 00:29:50,480 --> 00:29:53,120 So you coming up to see me after lunchtime lock up then? 417 00:29:53,160 --> 00:29:54,640 I've got some ciggies. 418 00:29:54,680 --> 00:29:58,040 I'd love to, shell, but me and shaz have got art. 419 00:29:58,080 --> 00:30:01,120 Art?! Yeah, we're doing art classes. 420 00:30:01,160 --> 00:30:05,120 Fair enough, no big deal. Another time, yeah? 421 00:30:05,160 --> 00:30:06,720 If you like. 422 00:30:11,800 --> 00:30:14,720 Get your gear together. You're moving on to g wing. 423 00:30:14,760 --> 00:30:17,720 Well, I hope it's better than this doss hole. It's alive with bloody bugs. 424 00:30:17,760 --> 00:30:20,720 Surprised they haven't chewed me down to the bone while I've been in here. 425 00:30:20,760 --> 00:30:23,160 Well, you'll want to get a move on, then, won't you? 426 00:30:23,200 --> 00:30:25,840 A shower. That's what I want. 427 00:30:25,880 --> 00:30:28,280 Smells like a jungle in here. 428 00:30:28,320 --> 00:30:31,840 You make one more remark like that and I'll have you on report! 429 00:30:37,360 --> 00:30:41,080 Come on, then. You've got to open it. 430 00:30:41,120 --> 00:30:42,960 Supposing he's dead ugly. 431 00:30:43,000 --> 00:30:45,400 What if there's something wrong with him? 432 00:30:45,440 --> 00:30:47,040 When we was working, you had ugly men. 433 00:30:47,080 --> 00:30:48,840 Yeah, but I don't want ugly kids, do I? 434 00:30:48,880 --> 00:30:50,800 Well, there's only one way to find out. 435 00:30:55,360 --> 00:30:57,080 Please. 436 00:30:57,120 --> 00:30:58,840 Give us it. 437 00:31:09,440 --> 00:31:11,040 Oh! 438 00:31:11,080 --> 00:31:13,760 He's a bit of all right, isn't he? 439 00:31:16,880 --> 00:31:20,480 "Looking forward to seeing you 440 00:31:20,520 --> 00:31:23,600 "in the flesh." Yeah, I bet he is! 441 00:31:23,640 --> 00:31:26,480 Still, my way, you both get what you're after 442 00:31:26,520 --> 00:31:27,840 and it won't get too messy. 443 00:31:29,560 --> 00:31:31,200 As long as you're quick. 444 00:31:52,120 --> 00:31:54,360 Well, well. Small bloody world, ain't it? 445 00:31:54,400 --> 00:31:56,800 I wondered where they'd shoved you. 446 00:31:56,840 --> 00:32:01,360 So now you know. Yeah, I do, don't I? And you'll be dead close. 447 00:32:12,800 --> 00:32:14,480 You'll be sharing with two other girls. 448 00:32:14,520 --> 00:32:16,440 And there's a third who's on restricted now, 449 00:32:16,480 --> 00:32:18,640 but she'll be back in a couple of weeks. 450 00:32:18,680 --> 00:32:20,600 Screw this, I want somewhere of my own. 451 00:32:20,640 --> 00:32:21,880 Tough, you're in here. 452 00:32:25,680 --> 00:32:28,240 Giggling 453 00:32:30,320 --> 00:32:32,360 giggling dies 454 00:32:55,360 --> 00:32:57,480 What they got you in for, then? 455 00:32:57,520 --> 00:32:59,600 Tarting on street corners? 456 00:32:59,640 --> 00:33:01,040 Love, darlin'. 457 00:33:01,080 --> 00:33:03,000 I'm doing this for my fella, aren't I? 458 00:33:04,000 --> 00:33:05,440 Sort of like you, I suppose. 459 00:33:06,440 --> 00:33:07,640 Still breathing, then? 460 00:33:07,680 --> 00:33:09,160 Oh, yeah. 461 00:33:09,200 --> 00:33:10,320 He'll live forever. 462 00:33:11,320 --> 00:33:12,880 Got a charmed life, he has. 463 00:33:14,000 --> 00:33:15,000 What about you? 464 00:33:15,040 --> 00:33:16,040 Me? 465 00:33:16,080 --> 00:33:17,080 Yeah, you. 466 00:33:18,160 --> 00:33:19,520 You got a charmed life? 467 00:33:20,520 --> 00:33:22,520 Cos you're gonna need one, now I'm here. 468 00:33:35,120 --> 00:33:36,360 What's in that? 469 00:33:36,400 --> 00:33:37,840 It's lasagne. 470 00:33:37,880 --> 00:33:39,080 I know what it is. 471 00:33:39,120 --> 00:33:40,960 I asked what was in it. 472 00:33:41,000 --> 00:33:43,120 Do I look like Delia frickin' Smith? 473 00:33:45,840 --> 00:33:49,280 How d'you like to have your tits dipped in the chip pan, darlin'? 474 00:33:52,320 --> 00:33:54,000 Do you know her, that new woman? 475 00:33:55,000 --> 00:33:56,680 Well, you might say that her bloke 476 00:33:56,720 --> 00:33:58,760 and my Charlie were business competitors. 477 00:33:58,800 --> 00:34:00,400 Oh, I see. 478 00:34:00,440 --> 00:34:02,160 Look, don't worry, you'll be all right. 479 00:34:02,200 --> 00:34:03,640 Just stay out of her way. 480 00:34:05,080 --> 00:34:08,040 Anyway, she's got her sights set on someone else. 481 00:34:08,080 --> 00:34:09,200 You? 482 00:34:10,240 --> 00:34:13,840 It was her or her man fixing it to try and bump my Charlie off. 483 00:34:13,880 --> 00:34:15,320 That's how I landed in here. 484 00:34:16,280 --> 00:34:19,440 It was Renee Williams' husband I took a contract out on to kill. 485 00:34:56,920 --> 00:34:58,400 D'you have to eat like that? 486 00:34:59,480 --> 00:35:00,520 Want one? 487 00:35:09,000 --> 00:35:10,560 Shit! Bitch! 488 00:35:14,120 --> 00:35:16,000 Which bitch is shitting now, eh? 489 00:35:16,040 --> 00:35:18,200 Hey, come on. Leave her alone. 490 00:35:18,240 --> 00:35:20,960 Let's just get a couple of things sorted, all right? 491 00:35:21,000 --> 00:35:24,000 Shouting: All right, sweetheart?! Yeah. 492 00:35:24,040 --> 00:35:25,320 I don't like you. 493 00:35:26,320 --> 00:35:27,880 Or your little boyfriend. 494 00:35:28,920 --> 00:35:32,040 And if I have to share a room with you two monkeys, 495 00:35:32,080 --> 00:35:34,000 get one thing clear. 496 00:35:35,200 --> 00:35:37,400 This is Renee's room. 497 00:35:38,400 --> 00:35:39,760 Ok? 498 00:35:39,800 --> 00:35:40,920 All right. 499 00:36:10,920 --> 00:36:13,200 Wow, ju, you're gonna look gorgeous. 500 00:36:13,240 --> 00:36:14,920 I could go for you myself. 501 00:36:14,960 --> 00:36:15,960 Are you sure? 502 00:36:16,000 --> 00:36:17,040 Trust me. 503 00:36:17,080 --> 00:36:20,600 One look at you and he'll be like putty in your hands. 504 00:36:20,640 --> 00:36:22,000 Well, let's hope not, eh? 505 00:36:24,080 --> 00:36:25,360 Don't you worry. 506 00:36:27,840 --> 00:36:29,880 You sure this is gonna work? 507 00:36:29,920 --> 00:36:31,720 Don't seem very scientific to me. 508 00:36:31,760 --> 00:36:33,760 Science has got nothing to do with it. 509 00:36:33,800 --> 00:36:35,440 Believe me, it'll work. 510 00:36:35,480 --> 00:36:37,360 It's nature, innit? 511 00:36:37,400 --> 00:36:39,200 Don't sound very natural to me, either. 512 00:36:39,240 --> 00:36:42,360 Listen, you just make sure you've got the yoghurt pot at the ready. 513 00:36:42,400 --> 00:36:44,440 Then a clean syringe and bingo. 514 00:36:45,680 --> 00:36:48,320 Oh, I could open my own clinic when I leave here. 515 00:36:56,080 --> 00:36:58,080 Door clunks open you on this evening? 516 00:36:58,120 --> 00:36:59,360 Oh, no, thank god. 517 00:37:02,600 --> 00:37:05,680 If there's one job I loathe in here, it's visiting time. 518 00:37:05,720 --> 00:37:08,040 All pawing each other and telling each other 519 00:37:08,080 --> 00:37:09,520 how much they'll miss the other. 520 00:37:10,560 --> 00:37:12,720 Then afterwards it's back to the girlfriend for him 521 00:37:12,760 --> 00:37:14,000 and the same for her. 522 00:37:15,960 --> 00:37:18,880 Chattering laughter 523 00:37:20,320 --> 00:37:23,160 exclamations of delight 524 00:37:32,240 --> 00:37:33,800 Hello. Hello. 525 00:37:33,840 --> 00:37:34,840 Sit down. 526 00:37:40,720 --> 00:37:42,040 I want you to know... 527 00:37:43,040 --> 00:37:44,520 ..This is a real pleasure. 528 00:37:47,800 --> 00:37:49,160 With pleasure, Wanda. 529 00:38:12,200 --> 00:38:14,200 Yeah, I'm sorry about that. 530 00:38:14,240 --> 00:38:16,160 Nobody takes any pictures of me these days. 531 00:38:17,520 --> 00:38:20,080 Still, I haven't changed that much, have I? 532 00:38:21,120 --> 00:38:22,240 Why? 533 00:38:22,280 --> 00:38:23,600 Are you disappointed? 534 00:38:23,640 --> 00:38:24,880 Oh, no. No. 535 00:38:24,920 --> 00:38:25,960 Course not. 536 00:38:27,000 --> 00:38:28,000 Of course... 537 00:38:29,120 --> 00:38:31,120 ..Everything works as well today 538 00:38:31,160 --> 00:38:32,960 as it did then, you know. 539 00:38:33,000 --> 00:38:34,720 Oh, yeah, I'm glad to hear it. 540 00:38:34,760 --> 00:38:37,800 All the same, though, I didn't expect this, all these... 541 00:38:37,840 --> 00:38:39,200 All these people. 542 00:38:39,240 --> 00:38:40,920 I thought we'd be on our tods. 543 00:38:42,760 --> 00:38:44,240 It makes it sort of... 544 00:38:45,600 --> 00:38:47,040 ..Awkward, doesn't it? 545 00:38:47,080 --> 00:38:48,080 Yeah, but... 546 00:38:49,080 --> 00:38:50,600 ..It's exciting, though, innit? 547 00:38:57,280 --> 00:38:59,520 Giggling 548 00:39:03,960 --> 00:39:05,240 got you! 549 00:39:05,280 --> 00:39:07,320 Out! Now! 550 00:39:07,360 --> 00:39:09,080 We weren't doing nothing. 551 00:39:09,120 --> 00:39:10,760 Well, whatever you were doing, 552 00:39:10,800 --> 00:39:12,760 I hope you made the most of it. 553 00:39:12,800 --> 00:39:16,680 Because you two are getting split up - for good! 554 00:39:16,720 --> 00:39:19,680 It'll just be like over the phone. 555 00:39:19,720 --> 00:39:22,880 Only I'll be here - to give you a hand. 556 00:39:37,400 --> 00:39:39,160 Unnatural activities. 557 00:39:39,200 --> 00:39:40,240 Such as? 558 00:39:41,280 --> 00:39:44,640 Denny blood and that new girl are all over each other like bed boils. 559 00:39:45,720 --> 00:39:47,160 It's sickening. 560 00:39:47,200 --> 00:39:48,600 And it's a bad influence. 561 00:39:48,640 --> 00:39:50,440 In what way, exactly? 562 00:39:50,480 --> 00:39:52,440 I beg your pardon. 563 00:39:52,480 --> 00:39:54,320 Perhaps I should remind you, ma'am, 564 00:39:54,360 --> 00:39:57,680 that lesbian activities are against prison rules. 565 00:39:57,720 --> 00:40:00,200 Just how difficult do you want your job to be? 566 00:40:01,200 --> 00:40:03,120 I'm sorry, I don't follow you. 567 00:40:03,160 --> 00:40:05,080 Some rules - not many... 568 00:40:05,120 --> 00:40:07,600 One or two are best turned a blind eye to 569 00:40:07,640 --> 00:40:11,160 if we want to have any chance at all of running an orderly prison. 570 00:40:11,200 --> 00:40:12,560 But it's disgusting. 571 00:40:13,640 --> 00:40:15,880 Then don't watch them when they're at it. 572 00:40:19,240 --> 00:40:21,360 "Don't watch them when they're at it?!" 573 00:40:21,400 --> 00:40:22,840 What does she think I am?! 574 00:40:24,080 --> 00:40:26,320 I think she knows what you are, sylv. 575 00:40:26,360 --> 00:40:27,600 This is a prison. 576 00:40:27,640 --> 00:40:29,240 Not married quarters. 577 00:40:31,840 --> 00:40:34,280 Chattering 578 00:40:46,040 --> 00:40:47,400 What's that? 579 00:40:48,680 --> 00:40:49,720 Nothing. 580 00:40:53,240 --> 00:40:54,240 No. 581 00:40:55,320 --> 00:40:56,320 There is something. 582 00:40:57,360 --> 00:40:59,440 No, it's nothing. Honestly. 583 00:40:59,480 --> 00:41:01,440 Just relax and enjoy yourself. 584 00:41:02,840 --> 00:41:05,040 Clattering that... 585 00:41:05,080 --> 00:41:06,800 What the hell are you doing?! 586 00:41:06,840 --> 00:41:08,120 What's that? 587 00:41:08,160 --> 00:41:11,160 Oh, it's... Just an old yoghurt pot. 588 00:41:11,200 --> 00:41:12,920 What do you want with a yoghurt...? 589 00:41:15,360 --> 00:41:16,800 Oh, hold on. 590 00:41:16,840 --> 00:41:18,720 I get it. 591 00:41:18,760 --> 00:41:20,120 Louder: This is a scam! 592 00:41:20,160 --> 00:41:22,480 Chatter quietens nine months down the line, 593 00:41:22,520 --> 00:41:24,360 you writ me with a paternity suit! 594 00:41:24,400 --> 00:41:26,400 Hushed: No, no, it's not like that! 595 00:41:26,440 --> 00:41:27,960 What's going on here? 596 00:41:28,000 --> 00:41:30,120 Zip snags 597 00:41:36,240 --> 00:41:37,920 I'm waiting, Julies. 598 00:41:37,960 --> 00:41:40,600 He came over the wall... He came in through the kitchens. 599 00:41:40,640 --> 00:41:42,720 It was in the kitchen... Over the wall. 600 00:41:42,760 --> 00:41:44,600 Do you want to try again? 601 00:41:44,640 --> 00:41:46,240 Nah. 602 00:41:46,280 --> 00:41:47,520 We didn't mean no harm. 603 00:41:48,520 --> 00:41:51,160 What, turning larkhall into a soho vice ring?! 604 00:41:51,200 --> 00:41:52,440 No, we didn't, miss. 605 00:41:52,480 --> 00:41:53,720 We're really sorry. 606 00:41:53,760 --> 00:41:55,680 You've got every right to be upset. 607 00:41:55,720 --> 00:41:58,160 Oh. Well, thank you for your understanding. 608 00:41:59,840 --> 00:42:01,520 Now perhaps you'd like to tell me 609 00:42:01,560 --> 00:42:03,720 who else was in on this scam of yours. 610 00:42:03,760 --> 00:42:05,000 No-one. No, it's just us. 611 00:42:05,040 --> 00:42:06,920 Just us. Just you? 612 00:42:06,960 --> 00:42:08,240 Yes, miss. 613 00:42:08,280 --> 00:42:10,280 Karen scoffs no way, Julies. 614 00:42:10,320 --> 00:42:13,200 Yeah, miss. We can be pretty handy when we need to be. 615 00:42:13,240 --> 00:42:15,880 Yeah. We're very experienced, you know. We know what men like. 616 00:42:15,920 --> 00:42:18,160 Oh, well, that was obvious in the visiting room! 617 00:42:19,840 --> 00:42:22,080 There's really no-one else involved. 618 00:42:22,120 --> 00:42:23,600 Honest. Honest. 619 00:42:25,240 --> 00:42:26,440 Hollamby: Come on, you lot! 620 00:42:26,480 --> 00:42:28,400 I want everyone in their cells! 621 00:42:28,440 --> 00:42:31,120 There's been a serious breach of security! 622 00:42:32,400 --> 00:42:33,720 Shit, it's the phones! 623 00:42:33,760 --> 00:42:34,760 What? It's gotta be. 624 00:42:34,800 --> 00:42:36,240 They found out about the phones. 625 00:42:36,280 --> 00:42:38,440 This better not be your bloody mate, Denny! 626 00:42:38,480 --> 00:42:39,920 No way, man, she's cool. 627 00:42:39,960 --> 00:42:42,360 Every cell on the wing's going to have a spin. 628 00:42:42,400 --> 00:42:43,600 What are we gonna do? 629 00:42:43,640 --> 00:42:45,560 'Ere. Take this, Denny. Shell, give her yours. 630 00:42:45,600 --> 00:42:47,320 Come on! Move it! 631 00:42:47,360 --> 00:42:49,840 For goodness' sake, we haven't got all day! 632 00:42:49,880 --> 00:42:52,040 Then go and get yours and dump 'em. Where? 633 00:42:52,080 --> 00:42:54,520 Use your imagination. You just make sure no-one finds them. 634 00:42:56,480 --> 00:42:58,000 Out. No. Out! No! 635 00:42:58,040 --> 00:42:59,080 Out! 636 00:43:00,360 --> 00:43:02,040 Come on, Mabel, get a move on! 637 00:43:10,080 --> 00:43:11,400 Adams! In there! 638 00:43:11,440 --> 00:43:12,520 Hurry up! 639 00:43:15,240 --> 00:43:16,320 Nope. 640 00:43:22,800 --> 00:43:24,800 Knocking at door 641 00:43:24,840 --> 00:43:27,440 hollamby: Who's in there?! It's me, miss! Denny blood! 642 00:43:27,480 --> 00:43:29,440 Well, let's have you out. Now! 643 00:43:29,480 --> 00:43:30,760 Yeah, just a minute. 644 00:43:33,520 --> 00:43:35,520 Toilet flushes 645 00:43:37,600 --> 00:43:39,600 shouts of protest 646 00:43:41,040 --> 00:43:42,080 out the way! 647 00:43:51,240 --> 00:43:54,640 Hollamby tuts not so much as a little black book. 648 00:43:54,680 --> 00:43:56,760 Let alone a mobile phone. 649 00:43:56,800 --> 00:43:58,320 The Julies weren't on their own. 650 00:43:58,360 --> 00:44:00,080 Is that what madam thinks? 651 00:44:00,120 --> 00:44:02,040 As if she knows anything. 652 00:44:02,080 --> 00:44:04,200 All I know is I need a brew. 653 00:44:09,560 --> 00:44:11,400 D'you think that screw means it? 654 00:44:11,440 --> 00:44:12,440 Hollamby? 655 00:44:12,480 --> 00:44:14,040 Splitting us up? 656 00:44:14,080 --> 00:44:15,320 Yeah, she means it. 657 00:44:16,920 --> 00:44:19,160 Wish I had a bag of old oysters. 658 00:44:21,160 --> 00:44:22,680 I love you, shaz. 659 00:44:25,600 --> 00:44:28,680 I thought you'd want to know that the powers that be 660 00:44:28,720 --> 00:44:31,680 have decided to turn a blind eye to your activities. 661 00:44:31,720 --> 00:44:32,720 Yes! 662 00:44:32,760 --> 00:44:34,320 But don't think I will. 663 00:44:34,360 --> 00:44:37,760 What you two do to each other is unnatural and disgusting. 664 00:44:37,800 --> 00:44:39,720 And if the only way to stop it 665 00:44:39,760 --> 00:44:41,920 is finding some way to get you split up, 666 00:44:41,960 --> 00:44:44,920 then I'll do it - one way or the other. 667 00:44:46,320 --> 00:44:48,480 Not if we get to you first, you won't. 668 00:45:03,560 --> 00:45:05,960 What the bloody hell did they think they were doing? 669 00:45:06,000 --> 00:45:07,920 Looks like they was giving some bloke extras. 670 00:45:07,960 --> 00:45:09,320 I'll give them friggin' extras. 671 00:45:09,360 --> 00:45:11,360 Well, they always was a couple of thick old tarts. 672 00:45:11,400 --> 00:45:14,520 Look on the positive side. At least the screws didn't find your phones. 673 00:45:14,560 --> 00:45:18,160 Yeah, but if we haven't got the phones, we can't carry on with the business. 674 00:45:18,200 --> 00:45:19,880 No, but you're not in trouble either. 675 00:45:19,920 --> 00:45:21,320 Be quiet now. 676 00:45:24,840 --> 00:45:26,480 What's this? 677 00:45:26,520 --> 00:45:28,320 Missing out on the gossip, am I? 678 00:45:28,360 --> 00:45:30,320 Love a bit of gossip, I do. 679 00:45:30,360 --> 00:45:31,800 Yeah, well, this is private. 680 00:45:31,840 --> 00:45:33,720 Oh, suit yourself. 681 00:45:33,760 --> 00:45:37,040 Anyhow, talking of gossip, I hear your Charlie got himself banged up. 682 00:45:38,520 --> 00:45:40,920 Stupid thing to do, weren't it? 683 00:45:40,960 --> 00:45:41,960 Coppers got lucky. 684 00:45:42,000 --> 00:45:43,400 Oh, lucky coppers. 685 00:45:44,400 --> 00:45:45,960 Still... 686 00:45:46,000 --> 00:45:47,920 ..Must be a weight off your mind, eh? 687 00:45:49,280 --> 00:45:50,520 With you in here? 688 00:45:52,000 --> 00:45:55,000 At least you know Charlie ain't poking any other women. 689 00:45:57,480 --> 00:46:00,400 Don't judge my Charlie by what your old man gets up to. 690 00:46:00,440 --> 00:46:01,560 Oh, I'm not, love. 691 00:46:03,240 --> 00:46:05,320 I'm speaking from experience. 692 00:46:07,800 --> 00:46:11,160 Oh, don't tell me he never 'fessed up about me and him? 693 00:46:14,360 --> 00:46:16,560 Yvonne scoffs 694 00:46:16,600 --> 00:46:17,600 whoops. 695 00:46:18,600 --> 00:46:19,840 In your dreams. 696 00:46:21,040 --> 00:46:23,600 He wouldn't touch you with a barge pole. 697 00:46:23,640 --> 00:46:25,520 Nah, you're right. 698 00:46:25,560 --> 00:46:27,520 It wasn't a barge pole he used. 699 00:46:29,080 --> 00:46:31,480 It was kind of unusual, if I remember. 700 00:46:31,520 --> 00:46:34,640 That nasty little scar he's got just over it. 701 00:46:36,640 --> 00:46:37,760 Couple of inches lower 702 00:46:37,800 --> 00:46:40,240 and he wouldn't have had one to shag me with. 703 00:46:41,240 --> 00:46:43,160 You ain't gonna stand for that, are ya? 704 00:46:43,200 --> 00:46:44,280 Do her! 705 00:46:52,760 --> 00:46:54,960 Door clangs shut 706 00:47:05,600 --> 00:47:07,600 Yvonne sobs quietly 707 00:47:08,600 --> 00:47:10,600 Yvonne sniffs 708 00:47:56,760 --> 00:47:59,760 Subtitles by red bee media