1 00:00:00,043 --> 00:00:02,323 WARNING: VERY strong language and sexual scenes from the start. 2 00:00:02,363 --> 00:00:06,963 His dad had a stroke. He's paralysed. He might die. 3 00:00:04,923 --> 00:00:06,963 Good. 4 00:00:06,963 --> 00:00:13,843 Could you sign this ? It states you won't make a claim for inheritance. 5 00:00:11,283 --> 00:00:13,843 There you go. Thanks, Mum. 6 00:00:15,483 --> 00:00:20,763 We're celebrating. We've just got engaged. Pass the word round. 7 00:00:20,963 --> 00:00:23,123 Wedding fever. 8 00:00:23,123 --> 00:00:30,963 Clever little bastard. 9 00:00:24,563 --> 00:00:30,963 I bet you he gets that job, not me. If he gets married, he'll be promoted. 10 00:00:31,163 --> 00:00:36,723 At 14, hormones all over, you'd have shagged a letter box. But not him ? 11 00:00:36,923 --> 00:00:40,763 Nope. You've got to fancy him. 12 00:00:40,963 --> 00:00:44,403 # "Spanish Eyes" 13 00:00:42,403 --> 00:00:44,403 Love can fuck off. 14 00:00:44,403 --> 00:00:46,483 If you fancy him... 15 00:00:46,483 --> 00:00:51,963 ..there's blood, there's a hard-on. If you just love him, no blood. 16 00:00:51,963 --> 00:00:54,123 # SONG CONTINUES 17 00:00:56,363 --> 00:01:00,763 Phil used to say you were saving me for your old age. 18 00:01:01,843 --> 00:01:05,643 So the day I shag you, I'm old. 19 00:01:34,243 --> 00:01:36,243 I'd better warn you. 20 00:01:36,243 --> 00:01:38,243 I'm on this medication. 21 00:01:39,643 --> 00:01:41,643 I'm taking these pills. 22 00:01:41,643 --> 00:01:43,643 What for ? 23 00:01:43,643 --> 00:01:46,443 Me stomach. 24 00:01:44,443 --> 00:01:46,443 That's all right. 25 00:01:46,443 --> 00:01:48,803 Ah ! Oh ! 26 00:01:48,803 --> 00:01:50,803 But the thing is,... 27 00:01:50,803 --> 00:01:55,043 ..these pills,... ah, God ! 28 00:01:56,643 --> 00:01:58,643 They sort of... 29 00:01:58,643 --> 00:02:00,643 (BOTH PANT) 30 00:02:00,643 --> 00:02:02,883 ..they do things to me. 31 00:02:05,163 --> 00:02:09,403 They make me spunk... ah, ah, they make me spunks... 32 00:02:09,403 --> 00:02:13,923 ..me spunks... ah... ah ! 33 00:02:17,883 --> 00:02:21,123 Orange. (LAUGHS) 34 00:02:23,443 --> 00:02:27,243 I'll just go get my brush, I had garlic bread. 35 00:02:27,243 --> 00:02:29,243 Shall I go through ? 36 00:02:29,483 --> 00:02:34,803 Oh, living room on the left, bedroom on the right. 37 00:02:34,803 --> 00:02:36,803 Don't be long. 38 00:02:42,763 --> 00:02:44,763 (RETCHES) 39 00:02:47,443 --> 00:02:49,443 (SPITS) 40 00:02:51,163 --> 00:02:52,323 You all right ? 41 00:02:52,323 --> 00:02:54,723 Oh, fine, thanks. 42 00:02:54,723 --> 00:02:57,723 Can't stand toothbrushes. Sorry. 43 00:02:58,363 --> 00:03:02,203 Aaagh ! Horrible things ! (SPITS) 44 00:03:02,203 --> 00:03:04,883 Oh, my God ! Is that the time ? 45 00:03:04,883 --> 00:03:07,123 < (RETCHES) 46 00:03:10,643 --> 00:03:15,163 (I'd better go.) 47 00:03:11,763 --> 00:03:15,163 (One more minute.) 48 00:03:19,123 --> 00:03:21,443 Really, I'd better go. 49 00:03:21,443 --> 00:03:23,443 Oh, come on. 50 00:03:23,443 --> 00:03:24,963 HORN 51 00:03:25,163 --> 00:03:29,363 It's three in the morning and the whole street wakes up. 52 00:03:29,363 --> 00:03:33,323 Is that it ? 53 00:03:29,883 --> 00:03:33,323 It was so loud ! 54 00:03:31,163 --> 00:03:33,323 That's the punch line ? 55 00:03:33,323 --> 00:03:40,123 That's pathetic. 56 00:03:34,683 --> 00:03:40,123 All these people looking out and I'm snogging this bloke ! 57 00:03:40,323 --> 00:03:46,083 That's not a story. 58 00:03:41,323 --> 00:03:46,083 He gets toothbrush man. I get a man with spunk like a Teletubby. 59 00:03:46,083 --> 00:03:49,483 You haven't even started yet. 60 00:03:47,083 --> 00:03:49,483 So young. 61 00:03:49,483 --> 00:03:55,003 D'you think I should phone him ? Or wait for him to phone me first ? 62 00:03:55,003 --> 00:04:00,243 Well, how the fuck should I know ? 63 00:03:56,923 --> 00:04:00,243 He's never phoned anyone. 64 00:03:58,003 --> 00:04:00,243 But you know how it works. 65 00:04:00,443 --> 00:04:05,603 Problem page: "Dear Stuart..." 66 00:04:02,403 --> 00:04:05,603 Shut up. 67 00:04:03,283 --> 00:04:05,603 Wise old man, that's you. 68 00:04:05,803 --> 00:04:09,803 You're so not funny. 69 00:04:07,803 --> 00:04:09,803 Look, he's pissed off. 70 00:04:09,803 --> 00:04:14,123 He's really pissed off. Now that's funny. > 71 00:04:14,323 --> 00:04:16,443 See his face ! (LAUGHS) 72 00:04:18,483 --> 00:04:20,683 (LAUGHS) > 73 00:04:23,083 --> 00:04:25,403 Me, too. 74 00:04:24,123 --> 00:04:25,403 Good luck, then. 75 00:04:25,403 --> 00:04:29,403 And you. May the best man (LAUGHS) and all that. 76 00:04:37,403 --> 00:04:40,723 And he told Mrs Fletcher in passing. 77 00:04:40,723 --> 00:04:46,203 In passing my left leg. He's fighting dirty. 78 00:04:43,043 --> 00:04:46,203 I don't care. I'll get that job. 79 00:04:46,403 --> 00:04:52,763 If you knew the colour it'd help. 80 00:04:48,523 --> 00:04:52,763 It has the Virgin Mary on the dashboard. 81 00:04:52,763 --> 00:04:56,963 If Vince finds out he'll murder you. 82 00:04:53,963 --> 00:04:56,963 We need this promotion more than him 83 00:04:56,963 --> 00:05:01,963 If you spend more on rent and less on rent boys - that's the one ! 84 00:05:01,963 --> 00:05:04,963 Oh, bless the Catholic boy. 85 00:05:04,963 --> 00:05:06,883 Are you ready ? 86 00:05:08,003 --> 00:05:11,203 BEEPING 87 00:05:11,803 --> 00:05:16,243 Graham, it's your car, the alarm's gone off. 88 00:05:17,003 --> 00:05:19,203 BEEPING CONTINUES 89 00:05:20,203 --> 00:05:22,203 Steady now. 90 00:05:23,723 --> 00:05:29,283 D'you get it ? 91 00:05:25,403 --> 00:05:29,283 Bugger ! 92 00:05:26,403 --> 00:05:29,283 What happened ? > 93 00:05:27,283 --> 00:05:29,283 Don't know. > 94 00:05:29,283 --> 00:05:32,803 He's doing it again. Give it here ! Useless. 95 00:05:33,003 --> 00:05:34,883 BEEPS 96 00:05:34,883 --> 00:05:36,723 Yes ! 97 00:05:42,763 --> 00:05:45,443 If this doesn't work, leg it. 98 00:05:45,723 --> 00:05:48,483 BEEPS 99 00:05:46,603 --> 00:05:48,483 Oh ! 100 00:05:53,403 --> 00:05:55,403 Nice work. 101 00:05:55,403 --> 00:05:57,323 Thank you. 102 00:05:57,923 --> 00:05:59,923 Stage two. 103 00:06:00,123 --> 00:06:06,963 There's nothing here about websites. 104 00:06:01,843 --> 00:06:06,963 Exactly. If they upgraded their media they could whip Tesco's. 105 00:06:11,603 --> 00:06:16,083 I just need two minutes. 106 00:06:13,603 --> 00:06:16,083 The hypermarket division at 70%... 107 00:06:16,283 --> 00:06:19,163 Trolleys left, right and centre. 108 00:06:19,163 --> 00:06:25,443 If we'd crashed... there could've been children. 109 00:06:21,483 --> 00:06:25,443 I can only apologise, Mrs... 110 00:06:25,443 --> 00:06:29,003 Peel. 111 00:06:26,083 --> 00:06:29,003 I'll have a word with the staff. 112 00:06:30,083 --> 00:06:33,563 Thank you for alerting me to the problem. 113 00:06:33,563 --> 00:06:39,043 I'm not taking it any further but my husband's very upset. Aren't you? 114 00:06:39,563 --> 00:06:41,563 Oh, aye. 115 00:06:48,363 --> 00:06:52,323 Magda wants the porn back. She's having a party. 116 00:06:53,563 --> 00:06:55,563 You both did well. 117 00:06:55,563 --> 00:07:02,163 But there's only one job, it's a shame you can't both succeed. 118 00:06:58,643 --> 00:07:02,163 Absolutely. 119 00:06:59,563 --> 00:07:02,163 Yeah. I'd better, um... 120 00:07:09,763 --> 00:07:11,963 (Go on, then. Well ?) 121 00:07:13,123 --> 00:07:18,803 Ha ! 122 00:07:14,643 --> 00:07:18,803 He's got it ! 123 00:07:16,283 --> 00:07:18,803 (GIRLS SHOUT) 124 00:07:22,443 --> 00:07:24,043 Ho-ho ! 125 00:07:24,243 --> 00:07:28,203 In five years you'll be manager, how boring is that ? 126 00:07:28,203 --> 00:07:31,123 Oi ! 127 00:07:28,803 --> 00:07:31,123 We should celebrate. 128 00:07:31,123 --> 00:07:33,923 Nathan, have you done a threesome ? 129 00:07:33,923 --> 00:07:37,723 No. I got asked but they were both ugly. 130 00:07:37,723 --> 00:07:40,043 D'you fancy giving it a go ? 131 00:07:40,043 --> 00:07:42,363 Yeah. 132 00:07:42,363 --> 00:07:45,163 Right, then, off we go. Us three. 133 00:07:45,363 --> 00:07:50,683 In your dreams. 134 00:07:46,563 --> 00:07:50,683 You'd do it, Nathan, right ? It'd be education. 135 00:07:50,683 --> 00:07:53,483 Don't mind. I'm up for anything. 136 00:07:53,483 --> 00:07:55,603 Perfect threesome. 137 00:07:55,803 --> 00:07:59,203 I'd rather have a wank. 138 00:07:57,003 --> 00:07:59,203 You, me and Nathan. 139 00:08:00,123 --> 00:08:03,803 (LAUGHS) It'd be brilliant. 140 00:08:04,003 --> 00:08:06,643 I'd go for it, yeah. 141 00:08:07,203 --> 00:08:09,683 That's the problem with Vince. 142 00:08:09,883 --> 00:08:13,483 He doesn't want sex. He wants a wife ! 143 00:08:13,483 --> 00:08:18,763 (LAUGHS) 144 00:08:14,123 --> 00:08:18,763 Ha ha. Whoever ends up with me is a very lucky man. 145 00:08:18,963 --> 00:08:21,803 God help him. 146 00:08:19,803 --> 00:08:21,803 (LAUGHS) 147 00:08:21,803 --> 00:08:25,123 What's all this in aid of ? 148 00:08:22,523 --> 00:08:25,123 You're not exactly a good catch. 149 00:08:25,123 --> 00:08:30,043 I suppose you are ? 150 00:08:26,283 --> 00:08:30,043 Well, no-one's going to catch me. (LAUGHS) 151 00:08:32,283 --> 00:08:35,283 So, how many men have you had ? 152 00:08:35,483 --> 00:08:37,843 About seven. > 153 00:08:38,043 --> 00:08:42,083 I must have had two thousand and seven. 154 00:08:42,283 --> 00:08:45,883 That means I've got two thousand to go. 155 00:08:46,043 --> 00:08:48,483 How many have you got left ? 156 00:08:51,243 --> 00:08:52,723 (SNIGGERS) 157 00:08:53,603 --> 00:08:55,603 BELL 158 00:08:56,563 --> 00:08:58,963 Nathan ! Is it your birthday ? 159 00:08:58,963 --> 00:09:00,963 What if it is ? 160 00:09:00,963 --> 00:09:06,323 Having a party ? 161 00:09:02,163 --> 00:09:06,323 It's none of your business. 162 00:09:03,123 --> 00:09:06,323 With all your queer friends ? 163 00:09:06,523 --> 00:09:09,523 That's where he goes. Queer street. 164 00:09:09,723 --> 00:09:14,723 He's been watching us in the gym. He's been tossing himself off. 165 00:09:14,723 --> 00:09:16,723 I'd sooner toss myself off a cliff. 166 00:09:16,923 --> 00:09:21,963 You want some of this ? Go on, suck me off. 167 00:09:19,523 --> 00:09:21,963 He's got a stiffy ! > 168 00:09:21,963 --> 00:09:23,083 You'd know all about that. 169 00:09:23,283 --> 00:09:27,243 He fancies me. Sir, Nathan fancies me. Tell him ! 170 00:09:27,243 --> 00:09:32,643 He's a queer, sir. 171 00:09:28,723 --> 00:09:32,643 Keeps on looking, he fancies us. > 172 00:09:32,843 --> 00:09:38,963 Bet he's got lipstick in his handbag 173 00:09:34,803 --> 00:09:38,963 Piss off ! 174 00:09:35,843 --> 00:09:38,963 Nathan, enough of that language. 175 00:09:38,963 --> 00:09:42,803 Me ? What about them ? 176 00:09:40,603 --> 00:09:42,803 I said that's enough. 177 00:09:45,163 --> 00:09:46,963 Faggot. 178 00:09:47,683 --> 00:09:49,563 Queer. 179 00:09:53,003 --> 00:09:58,163 Be fair, he sent you a card. He never remembers my birthday. 180 00:09:58,363 --> 00:10:01,803 All I get is a card. He's my father. 181 00:10:01,803 --> 00:10:08,403 I'll call him tomorrow. He might have put some money in your account. 182 00:10:05,883 --> 00:10:08,403 Bet he hasn't. 183 00:10:08,403 --> 00:10:12,003 Hiya ! 184 00:10:09,003 --> 00:10:12,003 Happy birthday ! 185 00:10:09,723 --> 00:10:12,003 That's from both of us. 186 00:10:12,003 --> 00:10:17,123 If anyone asks, I'm 18. If they find out I'm 16 they'll chuck us out 187 00:10:17,123 --> 00:10:24,003 Wouldn't be Nathan's night without someone having to lie. 188 00:10:19,243 --> 00:10:24,003 Look, there's food. I'm starving, c'mon. 189 00:10:25,123 --> 00:10:28,763 You don't have to stand here all night. 190 00:10:31,883 --> 00:10:34,723 Amaretto. This'll put us in the mood 191 00:10:34,723 --> 00:10:36,883 I found it in my clothes. 192 00:10:36,883 --> 00:10:42,403 You lot enjoy yourselves. I'll be baby-sitting. 193 00:10:39,083 --> 00:10:42,403 Bring Alfred. It's a kids' party. 194 00:10:42,403 --> 00:10:46,803 Yeah, Pass The Parcel at Via Fossa. Good for your packages. 195 00:10:47,003 --> 00:10:50,563 Want one ? 196 00:10:48,563 --> 00:10:50,563 I'm not drinking. 197 00:10:50,563 --> 00:10:56,083 Let's not go. Take him back to the lesbians and we can go to Poptastic. 198 00:10:54,083 --> 00:10:56,083 DOORBELL 199 00:10:56,083 --> 00:10:58,083 That's for me. 200 00:10:58,083 --> 00:11:03,123 Listen to Vince taking charge - deputy manager ! 201 00:11:00,683 --> 00:11:03,123 He's power mad. 202 00:11:03,123 --> 00:11:05,483 It's a boring job. 203 00:11:06,803 --> 00:11:08,483 Somebody call an ambulance ? 204 00:11:13,883 --> 00:11:17,763 I had a Chunky KitKat. I guess that doesn't count. 205 00:11:17,763 --> 00:11:21,483 You walking all right ? 206 00:11:19,083 --> 00:11:21,483 Yeah, it's nothing. Let's go. 207 00:11:21,483 --> 00:11:26,083 What're you doing ? 208 00:11:22,923 --> 00:11:26,083 I'm a twat, I'm sorry. I'll be fine. 209 00:11:26,083 --> 00:11:31,723 You coming with him ? > 210 00:11:26,923 --> 00:11:31,723 What's this for ? 211 00:11:27,803 --> 00:11:31,723 I'm OK. Sod off, go to the party. I'm sorry. 212 00:11:31,923 --> 00:11:33,923 He's done it again. 213 00:11:33,923 --> 00:11:39,803 You twat ! 214 00:11:34,763 --> 00:11:39,803 I know. 215 00:11:36,163 --> 00:11:39,803 You coming or not ? 216 00:11:36,923 --> 00:11:39,803 Like I got a choice. 217 00:11:48,243 --> 00:11:50,643 Stupid fucking cunt. 218 00:11:51,483 --> 00:11:53,483 (CRIES) 219 00:11:56,563 --> 00:11:58,643 Where're we going ? 220 00:12:00,043 --> 00:12:02,883 Let's tell his mother the good news. 221 00:12:04,523 --> 00:12:06,523 Hiya ! I'm here. 222 00:12:06,523 --> 00:12:13,043 Hello, Bernie. 223 00:12:07,603 --> 00:12:13,043 Sorry about that, the others got held up. My fault. 224 00:12:13,043 --> 00:12:16,243 Oh, Alexander got called in to work. 225 00:12:16,243 --> 00:12:19,883 Couldn't wrap it but happy birthday. 226 00:12:19,883 --> 00:12:22,243 Thanks. Was Stuart there ? 227 00:12:22,443 --> 00:12:29,683 Think so. Any money behind the bar ? 228 00:12:24,803 --> 00:12:29,683 Yeah, say you're with Nathan's party but only wines and beers. 229 00:12:29,883 --> 00:12:31,763 I've got a watch. 230 00:12:32,443 --> 00:12:35,803 Hiya ! 231 00:12:33,803 --> 00:12:35,803 Who's that ? 232 00:12:35,803 --> 00:12:41,083 Stuart's secretary. 233 00:12:37,083 --> 00:12:41,083 Sent his secretary, that's nice of him. 234 00:12:41,083 --> 00:12:43,923 He might appear by satellite link ! 235 00:12:48,123 --> 00:12:50,123 Hi ! Is Stuart coming ? 236 00:12:50,123 --> 00:12:56,283 I don't know. If it doesn't involve his dry cleaning he tells me "Sod off". 237 00:12:56,283 --> 00:13:01,403 But d'you think he's coming ? 238 00:12:57,883 --> 00:13:01,403 Not if he's found something better. 239 00:13:02,883 --> 00:13:05,723 You don't even like him. 240 00:13:07,963 --> 00:13:09,763 Don't. 241 00:13:12,003 --> 00:13:14,243 Let's go home. 242 00:13:15,163 --> 00:13:18,763 Come with me. 243 00:13:16,123 --> 00:13:18,763 Does she deserve it ? 244 00:13:19,243 --> 00:13:21,723 You'll make it worse. 245 00:13:21,723 --> 00:13:25,083 Does she deserve it ? 246 00:13:22,483 --> 00:13:25,083 You can't. 247 00:13:25,083 --> 00:13:27,723 Watch me. 248 00:13:27,723 --> 00:13:31,323 Yeah. You'd like that. 249 00:13:32,403 --> 00:13:35,003 I've spent years watching you. 250 00:13:38,323 --> 00:13:40,203 Coward. 251 00:13:42,123 --> 00:13:44,123 Coward ! > 252 00:14:00,923 --> 00:14:03,763 I've got a message from your son. > 253 00:14:04,323 --> 00:14:08,443 I'd appreciate it if you didn't come to my house. 254 00:14:08,443 --> 00:14:11,563 < We have nothing to say to each other. 255 00:14:11,563 --> 00:14:13,763 Just one thing. 256 00:14:14,843 --> 00:14:16,323 Bang. 257 00:15:13,003 --> 00:15:16,003 # GERI HALLIWELL: Mi Chico Latino 258 00:15:18,763 --> 00:15:22,483 Vince ! Don't tell me. Stuart hasn't bothered. 259 00:15:22,483 --> 00:15:25,363 No. Yes. He's upstairs. 260 00:15:25,363 --> 00:15:28,723 Um, he's gone out. He's coming back. 261 00:15:28,723 --> 00:15:31,443 But he was here just now. 262 00:15:31,443 --> 00:15:33,803 Yeah, I bet. Jimmy ! 263 00:15:39,723 --> 00:15:42,043 Party face on. 264 00:15:44,323 --> 00:15:47,323 # When the river rhythm starts to play 265 00:15:47,323 --> 00:15:49,763 # Dance with me, make me sway... # 266 00:15:49,803 --> 00:15:55,883 You're late. Got me a present ? 267 00:15:52,163 --> 00:15:55,883 No. 268 00:15:52,723 --> 00:15:55,883 Get me a mobile phone if you want. 269 00:15:59,003 --> 00:16:02,163 # When the river rhythm starts to play 270 00:16:02,203 --> 00:16:05,683 # Dance with me, make me sway... 271 00:16:07,483 --> 00:16:08,883 Bang ! 272 00:16:11,283 --> 00:16:13,283 Oh, shit. 273 00:16:13,483 --> 00:16:17,323 Come back to mine. 274 00:16:15,323 --> 00:16:17,323 (SIGHS) 275 00:16:19,163 --> 00:16:21,163 I'm staying with Mum. 276 00:16:21,163 --> 00:16:23,323 Both come, both come back. 277 00:16:26,403 --> 00:16:28,403 She deserved it. 278 00:16:28,403 --> 00:16:33,723 I know. But tell her to fuck off. You're always telling me to fuck off. 279 00:16:33,923 --> 00:16:37,843 It's not enough any more. 280 00:16:35,083 --> 00:16:37,843 It is. You can't go and... 281 00:16:37,843 --> 00:16:41,243 People are relying on me, Mum and that house... 282 00:16:41,243 --> 00:16:45,883 I pay the mortgage every other month, that lot don't earn tuppence. 283 00:16:46,083 --> 00:16:48,563 You're on your own. 284 00:16:48,563 --> 00:16:51,483 Suits me. You're just straight. 285 00:16:51,483 --> 00:16:55,283 You're a straight man who fucks men, that's all. 286 00:17:07,323 --> 00:17:10,723 CROWD TALKING 287 00:18:03,803 --> 00:18:05,683 Sorry. 288 00:18:09,163 --> 00:18:11,603 Abotts ? 289 00:18:09,803 --> 00:18:11,603 Here. > 290 00:18:11,963 --> 00:18:13,003 Baxter ? 291 00:18:12,443 --> 00:18:13,003 < Here. 292 00:18:13,003 --> 00:18:15,763 Collins ? 293 00:18:13,963 --> 00:18:15,763 Here. > 294 00:18:15,763 --> 00:18:18,483 Davis ? 295 00:18:16,643 --> 00:18:18,483 Here. 296 00:18:18,483 --> 00:18:22,123 Thank you, Nathan, what time d'you call this ? 297 00:18:24,283 --> 00:18:28,523 One minute past nine, sir. Why ? 298 00:18:28,523 --> 00:18:30,643 You're late, that's why. 299 00:18:30,643 --> 00:18:38,603 How was the party ? Did you get it shoved up your arse ? 300 00:18:33,443 --> 00:18:38,603 LAUGHTER 301 00:18:34,363 --> 00:18:38,603 Party full of queers. Makes me sick. 302 00:18:38,803 --> 00:18:41,883 Settle down. Edgar ? 303 00:18:41,883 --> 00:18:44,523 < Here. 304 00:18:42,243 --> 00:18:44,523 Fraser ? 305 00:18:42,723 --> 00:18:44,523 Here. > 306 00:18:44,523 --> 00:18:47,563 Hobbs ? 307 00:18:45,083 --> 00:18:47,563 < Here. 308 00:18:45,723 --> 00:18:47,563 Johnson ? 309 00:18:47,563 --> 00:18:51,003 < Here. 310 00:18:48,203 --> 00:18:51,003 Jones ? 311 00:18:49,323 --> 00:18:51,003 Here. > 312 00:18:51,003 --> 00:18:53,443 Maloney ? 313 00:18:51,443 --> 00:18:53,443 Queer. 314 00:18:53,443 --> 00:18:55,443 MURMURING 315 00:18:56,763 --> 00:18:59,563 I beg your pardon ? 316 00:18:57,563 --> 00:18:59,563 I said queer. 317 00:18:59,563 --> 00:19:02,483 I'm aware of that. > 318 00:19:00,323 --> 00:19:02,483 Oh, that's a miracle. 319 00:19:02,483 --> 00:19:05,883 Cos they say it and you don't hear it. 320 00:19:05,883 --> 00:19:08,883 I don't like the tone of your voice. 321 00:19:06,883 --> 00:19:08,883 I don't like yours. 322 00:19:08,883 --> 00:19:13,683 If you want to make something out of this, sir, it's fine with me. 323 00:19:13,683 --> 00:19:17,083 Send me to the headmaster. I'd love it. 324 00:19:17,083 --> 00:19:24,083 There's plenty I can tell him. I can get my mother in, she'd love to meet you, sir. 325 00:19:25,003 --> 00:19:27,803 Go on. Take it further. 326 00:19:35,243 --> 00:19:38,123 McVetty ? 327 00:19:36,243 --> 00:19:38,123 < Here. 328 00:19:38,123 --> 00:19:40,763 Mullen ? 329 00:19:38,963 --> 00:19:40,763 Here. > 330 00:19:40,763 --> 00:19:43,883 Nichols ? 331 00:19:42,083 --> 00:19:43,883 < Here. 332 00:19:53,203 --> 00:19:55,243 CLATTERS 333 00:20:02,763 --> 00:20:04,763 They were just kids. 334 00:20:04,763 --> 00:20:07,083 They were running away. 335 00:20:07,083 --> 00:20:14,083 Mrs Perry never saw any kids. 336 00:20:08,163 --> 00:20:14,083 Sweethearts, I can't boil an egg. How the fuck do you blow up a car ? 337 00:20:14,083 --> 00:20:20,323 So it was a coincidence, you being there ? 338 00:20:15,763 --> 00:20:20,323 You should see my Jeep. I'll sue Mrs Perry for damages. 339 00:20:20,323 --> 00:20:23,123 She's not keen on pressing charges. 340 00:20:23,123 --> 00:20:28,243 There are some family things she'd rather not talk about. 341 00:20:26,043 --> 00:20:28,243 Oh, get her ! 342 00:20:28,243 --> 00:20:32,043 But it's not her decision. We won't let it drop. 343 00:20:32,243 --> 00:20:35,723 I'd better give you my cards. 344 00:20:35,923 --> 00:20:40,923 It's got my mobile number. I'm not going to be around here very long. 345 00:20:40,923 --> 00:20:45,243 Time for a change of scene. 346 00:20:43,003 --> 00:20:45,243 Anywhere in particular ? 347 00:20:45,243 --> 00:20:49,043 I'm moving to London. The clubs are fab. 348 00:20:52,003 --> 00:20:56,523 I've got that project in Brixton, I'm there all the time. 349 00:20:56,523 --> 00:20:59,723 He'll enjoy it. We'll manage. 350 00:21:01,563 --> 00:21:04,163 What's brought all this about ? 351 00:21:04,163 --> 00:21:06,763 Big fish in a small pond. 352 00:21:08,443 --> 00:21:13,323 It's so small. I'm friends with a 16-year-old boy. 353 00:21:14,123 --> 00:21:16,243 It's time to leave. 354 00:21:16,243 --> 00:21:20,403 Vince could get transferred. He could afford London. 355 00:21:20,603 --> 00:21:25,403 He'd just hold me back. Standing there disapproving. 356 00:21:25,603 --> 00:21:27,603 And you love it. 357 00:21:27,603 --> 00:21:29,883 I've got things I want to do. 358 00:21:29,883 --> 00:21:32,643 He's just, he's not good enough. 359 00:21:32,843 --> 00:21:36,563 You've argued again ! You're like a married couple. 360 00:21:36,763 --> 00:21:41,563 Except we're not shagging. 361 00:21:37,963 --> 00:21:41,563 That's a married couple. 362 00:21:39,563 --> 00:21:41,563 Another reason to go. 363 00:21:41,563 --> 00:21:45,123 I bet he moves to London. What's he said ? 364 00:21:49,003 --> 00:21:51,323 Go on, what's he said ? 365 00:21:55,803 --> 00:21:58,443 You haven't even told him ! 366 00:21:58,643 --> 00:22:01,483 LOUD LAUGHTER 367 00:22:02,403 --> 00:22:06,203 And he says "I'm not, I work in the tuck shop". 368 00:22:06,203 --> 00:22:08,203 (LAUGHS) 369 00:22:08,203 --> 00:22:11,123 Listen, George went to hospital. 370 00:22:11,563 --> 00:22:13,683 Not this one, give up ! 371 00:22:13,683 --> 00:22:16,683 # S-CLUB 7: Bring It All Back 372 00:22:23,083 --> 00:22:25,803 Evening. 373 00:22:23,803 --> 00:22:25,803 Evening. 374 00:22:25,803 --> 00:22:27,963 Two gin and tonics, please. 375 00:22:29,083 --> 00:22:31,123 You going out clubbing ? 376 00:22:31,123 --> 00:22:37,323 Why do you want to know ? 377 00:22:32,003 --> 00:22:37,323 Keeping tabs on my son. If you're going out clubbing, so is Nathan. 378 00:22:37,323 --> 00:22:39,323 His master's voice. 379 00:22:39,323 --> 00:22:41,963 Don't know what he sees in you. 380 00:22:41,963 --> 00:22:48,123 Yeah, you do. 381 00:22:43,683 --> 00:22:48,123 It's not what I'd call a hairstyle. As for the walk... 382 00:22:48,123 --> 00:22:50,123 Thank you. 383 00:22:50,123 --> 00:22:52,923 Suppose I'd better get used to it. 384 00:22:52,923 --> 00:22:58,563 Once Nathan thought you were boyfriend material. Now you're God. 385 00:22:58,563 --> 00:23:01,643 What am I supposed to do ? Leave ? 386 00:23:01,643 --> 00:23:06,603 Don't you dare, he'll only follow. He's done enough running away. 387 00:23:06,803 --> 00:23:08,803 Thanks for the drinks. 388 00:23:09,083 --> 00:23:11,243 Pleasure. 389 00:23:31,403 --> 00:23:34,283 Never did give you that present. 390 00:23:36,563 --> 00:23:38,883 I'll have a mobile phone. 391 00:23:40,243 --> 00:23:43,323 Hm. I can do better than that. 392 00:23:53,603 --> 00:23:56,003 (BOTH PANT) 393 00:23:58,003 --> 00:24:01,043 16 ? 394 00:23:59,043 --> 00:24:01,043 Shut up. 395 00:24:06,083 --> 00:24:08,563 Oh, don't. Don't. 396 00:24:08,763 --> 00:24:10,763 Oh, fuck. 397 00:24:11,763 --> 00:24:13,763 (PANTS) 398 00:24:21,843 --> 00:24:23,843 (I'm sorry.) 399 00:24:24,563 --> 00:24:26,563 It's OK. 400 00:24:26,963 --> 00:24:31,083 D'you want me to finish you off ? 401 00:24:28,563 --> 00:24:31,083 No, it's all right. 402 00:24:33,323 --> 00:24:36,043 Anyway, the night's still young. 403 00:24:36,043 --> 00:24:38,043 I'm really sorry. 404 00:24:49,283 --> 00:24:51,283 # DANCE MUSIC 405 00:25:04,643 --> 00:25:08,923 Nathan, I'm off. If you need a lift give me a ring. 406 00:25:08,923 --> 00:25:12,603 Might go to Dante's. 407 00:25:10,043 --> 00:25:12,603 Of course, with Stuart. 408 00:25:12,603 --> 00:25:17,403 Don't know. It's embarrassing being seen with him all the time. 409 00:25:17,403 --> 00:25:19,723 Up close, he looks dead old. 410 00:25:19,923 --> 00:25:24,803 He'd kill you for saying that. 411 00:25:21,523 --> 00:25:24,803 He wouldn't have the strength. 412 00:25:24,803 --> 00:25:27,643 Right. Dante's, quick visit ? 413 00:25:27,643 --> 00:25:32,643 I've not copped off for five weeks, ever since I got contact lenses ! 414 00:25:37,403 --> 00:25:39,243 Coming ? 415 00:25:40,163 --> 00:25:43,403 Yeah, all right. Might as well. 416 00:25:44,723 --> 00:25:46,723 Be bad. 417 00:25:50,883 --> 00:25:52,883 What am I ? A charity ? 418 00:25:52,883 --> 00:25:59,083 Me and Vince were going out one night and we took a tenner out of your purse. 419 00:25:59,083 --> 00:26:00,963 Cheeky sods. 420 00:26:00,963 --> 00:26:04,523 Hang on, when were you last short of a tenner ? 421 00:26:04,723 --> 00:26:06,723 # I've Got The Key 422 00:26:12,843 --> 00:26:17,203 The twat's wearing cheesecloth. Cheesecloth's back. 423 00:26:17,603 --> 00:26:21,883 It never went away, it disguised itself as linen. 424 00:26:19,883 --> 00:26:21,883 Steven Pollard ! 425 00:26:21,883 --> 00:26:26,043 He tried to snog me last Mardi Gras. See ya ! 426 00:26:35,003 --> 00:26:37,003 I should go. 427 00:26:37,003 --> 00:26:39,163 Big meeting tomorrow. 428 00:26:39,163 --> 00:26:42,243 I'm up early. Got to go to London. 429 00:26:44,443 --> 00:26:47,243 He's in. I hate seeing him. 430 00:26:47,243 --> 00:26:52,083 First time here he was a kid, then he got muscles, then he went mad 431 00:26:52,083 --> 00:26:56,203 He's been with that bloke five years. Never said a word. 432 00:26:56,203 --> 00:26:58,083 We nod. 433 00:26:58,083 --> 00:27:00,963 I've had him. 434 00:26:58,923 --> 00:27:00,963 You've had 'em all. 435 00:27:00,963 --> 00:27:03,603 I've been here far too long. 436 00:27:01,603 --> 00:27:03,603 Telling me. 437 00:27:03,803 --> 00:27:06,003 Oh, God, they're all in ! 438 00:27:06,003 --> 00:27:09,803 There's Colin ! I had him that last night at Flesh. 439 00:27:09,803 --> 00:27:16,043 (LAUGHS) Oh, God ! I had that suit ! 440 00:27:12,563 --> 00:27:16,043 I liked that suit. You looked good. 441 00:27:21,123 --> 00:27:23,763 Didn't half want to shag you. 442 00:27:31,803 --> 00:27:33,803 Long time ago. 443 00:27:34,203 --> 00:27:36,203 I should go. 444 00:27:38,683 --> 00:27:42,603 But then again, one last fling... 445 00:27:42,803 --> 00:27:45,603 Good luck. Not that you'll need it. 446 00:27:50,643 --> 00:27:54,363 (VINCE LAUGHS LOUDLY) 447 00:28:03,243 --> 00:28:06,723 D'you remember his little friend ? That girl ? 448 00:28:06,723 --> 00:28:13,403 Yeah. 449 00:28:07,963 --> 00:28:13,403 He didn't need her in the end. His best friend, he didn't need her. 450 00:28:13,403 --> 00:28:15,403 Clever boy. 451 00:28:19,323 --> 00:28:21,323 I'm off. 452 00:28:21,323 --> 00:28:23,323 London calling. 453 00:28:23,923 --> 00:28:26,963 London ? 454 00:28:24,923 --> 00:28:26,963 Yeah. 455 00:28:26,963 --> 00:28:29,603 Been here far too long. 456 00:28:32,723 --> 00:28:34,883 Still, we've had a laugh. 457 00:28:34,883 --> 00:28:36,803 And the rest. 458 00:28:38,803 --> 00:28:41,963 See you, then. 459 00:28:39,963 --> 00:28:41,963 Not if I see you first. 460 00:28:42,003 --> 00:28:43,483 # I've got the key 461 00:28:43,483 --> 00:28:45,483 # I've got the secret 462 00:28:45,523 --> 00:28:48,523 # I've got the key to another way 463 00:28:48,563 --> 00:28:50,563 # I've got the key... # 464 00:29:01,963 --> 00:29:05,363 Fat Daniel said he's back in town. 465 00:29:05,363 --> 00:29:08,723 Hypothermia my arse. 466 00:29:08,723 --> 00:29:11,683 I don't think he's even got a mother 467 00:29:11,683 --> 00:29:14,163 Oh, this tea tastes like fish. 468 00:29:14,163 --> 00:29:16,163 Who's on GMTV ? 469 00:29:16,163 --> 00:29:18,603 Kriss Akabusi. 470 00:29:18,603 --> 00:29:22,763 If I had a pound for every time that man laughed... 471 00:29:22,763 --> 00:29:25,563 I preferred it when it was TV AM. 472 00:29:28,923 --> 00:29:32,683 Wincey Willis. Wonder what happened to her ? 473 00:29:32,683 --> 00:29:38,483 Oh, Treasure Hunt ! Anneka Rice. 474 00:29:41,043 --> 00:29:44,283 Hello, Stuart Jones's office. 475 00:29:42,483 --> 00:29:44,283 "It's Hazel." 476 00:29:44,283 --> 00:29:49,483 Oh, I'll have to stop saying that. It's not his office any more. 477 00:29:49,483 --> 00:29:56,243 Tell Vince to keep in touch. I bet he's going to miss him. It's like a morgue here. 478 00:29:56,443 --> 00:29:59,563 Miss who ? 479 00:29:57,563 --> 00:29:59,563 Stuart. 480 00:30:00,963 --> 00:30:02,963 Sell it. 481 00:30:04,723 --> 00:30:10,683 Did you read the memo Wasting Company Time On Mobile Phones ? 482 00:30:09,203 --> 00:30:10,683 Sorry. 483 00:30:15,283 --> 00:30:19,683 "This is Vince, I can't take a call now, leave a message." 484 00:30:26,603 --> 00:30:28,603 PHONE RINGS 485 00:30:32,683 --> 00:30:37,923 Yes ? 486 00:30:33,763 --> 00:30:37,923 I need to speak to Vincent Tyler. 487 00:30:35,803 --> 00:30:37,923 "He's in a meeting." 488 00:30:37,923 --> 00:30:42,603 It's urgent. Could you tell him it's his mother ? 489 00:30:40,483 --> 00:30:42,603 Mrs Tyler ? 490 00:30:42,603 --> 00:30:45,923 "Yes." 491 00:30:43,523 --> 00:30:45,923 The famous Mrs Tyler. 492 00:30:45,923 --> 00:30:49,803 Mrs Tyler, were you in this store on the 14th ? 493 00:30:51,043 --> 00:30:54,563 Whoever you are, I must speak to Vince. 494 00:30:54,563 --> 00:30:58,523 Did you meet Mrs Fletcher, the head of personnel ? 495 00:30:58,523 --> 00:31:01,923 I'd like to know what happened that day. 496 00:31:02,043 --> 00:31:07,523 Bernie ! 497 00:31:03,803 --> 00:31:07,523 Let me get me trousers on ! 498 00:31:05,083 --> 00:31:07,523 Who's looking ? 499 00:31:07,723 --> 00:31:10,283 Fly my pretties, fly ! 500 00:31:12,723 --> 00:31:14,723 Sorry, it's compulsory. 501 00:31:14,923 --> 00:31:20,123 Supervisor delicatessen becomes front-line manager delicatessen. 502 00:31:20,123 --> 00:31:24,923 Assistant supervisors become assistant front-line managers. 503 00:31:25,003 --> 00:31:27,003 (COUGHS) 504 00:31:27,003 --> 00:31:31,363 Right, I know it's a pain but there's a good reason. 505 00:31:31,363 --> 00:31:36,403 All the front-line managers and assistant front-line managers... 506 00:31:36,403 --> 00:31:42,243 ..can get six weeks a year in administration. 507 00:31:44,283 --> 00:31:51,563 So you can choose six weeks in one block, two blocks of three or three blocks of two. 508 00:31:51,763 --> 00:31:53,763 Nathan ! 509 00:31:55,163 --> 00:31:59,443 < Telephone - says it's urgent. 510 00:31:57,163 --> 00:31:59,443 Who is it ? 511 00:31:59,643 --> 00:32:04,803 Call yourself a gay man ?! You're missing a palaver, you knob ! 512 00:32:09,963 --> 00:32:14,643 We'll still do individual product promotion, the IPP scheme,... 513 00:32:14,643 --> 00:32:20,603 ..but now you're responsible for finding your own individual product. 514 00:32:23,483 --> 00:32:26,963 And we need your name and chosen product... 515 00:32:28,003 --> 00:32:31,803 ..so that goes to the front-line manager... 516 00:32:32,803 --> 00:32:34,803 ..by Thursday. 517 00:32:36,443 --> 00:32:40,643 (GASPS) Right, er,... Oh, I've said that already. 518 00:32:40,643 --> 00:32:47,323 Chosen product to line-manager. 519 00:32:42,523 --> 00:32:47,323 If we could finish, we've got a store to run. Thank you. 520 00:32:47,323 --> 00:32:55,803 Sorry. 521 00:32:48,723 --> 00:32:55,803 It's Mrs Peel, isn't it ? 522 00:32:50,083 --> 00:32:55,803 I think you'll find it's Mrs Tyler. 523 00:32:53,203 --> 00:32:55,803 Tyler-Peel, we're from Cheshire. 524 00:32:56,003 --> 00:32:57,803 It's my mother. 525 00:32:57,803 --> 00:33:03,403 It's an emergency, I need a word with Vince. 526 00:33:00,843 --> 00:33:03,403 You met this woman on the 14th. 527 00:33:03,603 --> 00:33:08,803 Sit down. 528 00:33:04,643 --> 00:33:08,803 The day of the job interview. 529 00:33:06,763 --> 00:33:08,803 Stuart's leaving ! 530 00:33:09,003 --> 00:33:13,363 I know, I'm not stupid. 531 00:33:11,083 --> 00:33:13,363 He's going to London ! 532 00:33:13,563 --> 00:33:23,803 It's about time he did ! Leave it. 533 00:33:16,363 --> 00:33:23,803 Vince, I'd like a word. 534 00:33:17,483 --> 00:33:23,803 I insist. Something happened. I demand you talk to this creature. 535 00:33:24,003 --> 00:33:26,403 Oi ! That's my mother. 536 00:33:26,603 --> 00:33:28,763 That's your problem. 537 00:33:28,763 --> 00:33:33,363 Graham, as a friend of mine is very fond of saying - fuck off. 538 00:33:33,563 --> 00:33:38,123 Oh ! That's nice. That's how the deputy manager reacts ! > 539 00:33:38,123 --> 00:33:42,123 What an example - fine family, all of 'em ! > 540 00:33:42,923 --> 00:33:45,403 You know what ? 541 00:33:45,403 --> 00:33:48,843 He's right. "Fuck off" isn't enough. 542 00:33:48,843 --> 00:33:56,803 Marcie. 543 00:33:49,963 --> 00:33:56,803 Yes, sir ? 544 00:33:50,883 --> 00:33:56,803 The floor's yours and the subject is Christmas '99. 545 00:33:56,923 --> 00:33:58,923 Thank you, Mr Chairman. 546 00:33:58,923 --> 00:34:01,963 If Graham Beck is so keen on the truth... 547 00:34:02,003 --> 00:34:08,363 ..why not tell his fiancee that Christmas '99 he shagged me in refrigeration. 548 00:34:08,363 --> 00:34:14,763 I knew it ! 549 00:34:09,363 --> 00:34:14,763 It felt like refrigeration. 550 00:34:11,123 --> 00:34:14,763 I did not. 551 00:34:12,963 --> 00:34:14,763 Small dick ? 552 00:34:14,963 --> 00:34:17,443 That's him. You bastard. 553 00:34:17,643 --> 00:34:19,643 LAUGHING AND SHOUTING 554 00:34:20,363 --> 00:34:22,363 Bang. 555 00:34:31,363 --> 00:34:34,283 Vince, where d'you think you're going? 556 00:34:34,283 --> 00:34:39,443 London. Oh, my God, I'm going to London ! See you. 557 00:34:41,443 --> 00:34:45,563 Out the way, I'm driving ! You're too bloody slow. 558 00:34:45,563 --> 00:34:50,323 You haven't passed your test. 559 00:34:46,403 --> 00:34:50,323 That's why I'm not slow ! 560 00:34:51,763 --> 00:34:53,763 < Oi ! 561 00:34:53,763 --> 00:34:55,643 Excess baggage ! 562 00:35:06,883 --> 00:35:08,883 # KAZOOS: Colonel Bogey 563 00:35:13,283 --> 00:35:15,523 Come on ! What's going on ? 564 00:35:17,963 --> 00:35:20,003 You'll have to go back. 565 00:35:20,043 --> 00:35:24,403 There's nothing I can do about it. Just take it easy. 566 00:35:24,403 --> 00:35:28,403 Back up ! Back up ! 567 00:35:26,403 --> 00:35:28,403 ? I can't ! 568 00:35:28,403 --> 00:35:31,403 Who the fuck invented the kazoo ? 569 00:35:31,403 --> 00:35:33,403 Sixteen years, you two. 570 00:35:33,403 --> 00:35:36,763 Nathan Maloney was just being born. 571 00:35:36,763 --> 00:35:38,763 (SIGHS) 572 00:35:38,763 --> 00:35:42,203 Remind me again, who was it taught you to drive ? 573 00:35:42,203 --> 00:35:45,763 Stuart Alan Jones, my 40th birthday. 574 00:35:45,963 --> 00:35:47,963 How much did you learn ? 575 00:35:48,083 --> 00:35:50,083 I learned the lot. 576 00:35:50,283 --> 00:35:52,203 HORN BLARES 577 00:35:52,403 --> 00:35:54,963 SCREAMING 578 00:35:55,883 --> 00:35:58,563 He's not gay (!) (LAUGHS) 579 00:36:06,883 --> 00:36:08,883 SIRENS 580 00:36:16,363 --> 00:36:18,363 HORNS BLARING 581 00:36:23,283 --> 00:36:26,243 I've got to go. I've really got to go 582 00:36:26,243 --> 00:36:32,203 No-one's going anywhere, now calm down. 583 00:36:28,763 --> 00:36:32,203 I was driving, he was telling me to stop ! 584 00:36:32,203 --> 00:36:36,363 Listen, don't add resisting arrest, OK ? 585 00:36:36,363 --> 00:36:39,243 What are they saying back at base ? 586 00:36:41,243 --> 00:36:44,243 Never mind him, look after yourself. 587 00:36:47,843 --> 00:36:53,643 Well, if I'm gonna be carted off it might as well be worth it. 588 00:36:50,563 --> 00:36:53,643 How's that ? 589 00:36:53,843 --> 00:36:55,883 (GROANS) Bloody hell ! 590 00:36:55,883 --> 00:36:59,123 Run, you daft bastard ! 591 00:37:12,683 --> 00:37:15,043 Nice try. You're not coming. 592 00:37:15,043 --> 00:37:16,963 I'll do what I like. 593 00:37:17,163 --> 00:37:23,363 You'll not. It'd be you and me - an old married couple. 594 00:37:23,363 --> 00:37:25,363 Not a shag in sight. 595 00:37:25,363 --> 00:37:31,603 I'm not settling down. Ever. > 596 00:37:27,123 --> 00:37:31,603 London, though ? London's rubbish. Kids go to London. 597 00:37:31,803 --> 00:37:36,523 Where else is there ? 598 00:37:33,603 --> 00:37:36,523 I'd go out. Straight ahead and out. 599 00:37:37,563 --> 00:37:41,803 Keep moving. You can't settle down if you don't stop. 600 00:37:41,803 --> 00:37:49,043 I've thought about this for years - press the button, dematerialise, step out, new planet. 601 00:37:49,043 --> 00:37:51,523 Says the supermarket boy. 602 00:37:52,123 --> 00:37:54,803 I'm on the run from the police. 603 00:37:54,803 --> 00:37:56,843 (LAUGHS) 604 00:37:56,843 --> 00:37:58,643 Don't be so camp. 605 00:37:58,843 --> 00:38:05,923 Watch it. 606 00:38:00,403 --> 00:38:05,923 All those dependents. 607 00:38:01,763 --> 00:38:05,923 < They'll survive. 608 00:38:02,683 --> 00:38:05,923 And I won't ? 609 00:38:07,443 --> 00:38:09,443 You might not. 610 00:38:10,523 --> 00:38:17,803 No passengers, Vince. You let me down, I'll kill you. 611 00:38:14,203 --> 00:38:17,803 Not if I kill you first. 612 00:38:19,283 --> 00:38:21,363 So what we waiting for ? 613 00:38:38,563 --> 00:38:40,563 < Happy birthday. 614 00:38:40,563 --> 00:38:42,483 What are you doing ? 615 00:38:42,683 --> 00:38:50,723 We're off. 616 00:38:43,523 --> 00:38:50,723 Off where ? > 617 00:38:44,683 --> 00:38:50,723 Where d'you think, young fellow ? Into the headlines ! 618 00:38:50,723 --> 00:38:56,443 You never know you might finally get that shag. 619 00:38:53,603 --> 00:38:56,443 Give up ! Stop chasing me. 620 00:38:56,643 --> 00:39:01,243 You're coming back, though ? 621 00:38:58,003 --> 00:39:01,243 Come back to this ? The ghetto ? 622 00:39:01,243 --> 00:39:05,283 Alleyways stinking of piss, beggars in every doorway,... 623 00:39:05,283 --> 00:39:09,243 ..straights and students coming to look at the freak show. 624 00:39:09,443 --> 00:39:16,843 All the idiots saving their stupid money from their stupid jobs to shoot their load with a stranger. 625 00:39:16,843 --> 00:39:22,363 Just you look after it. This stupid street is the middle of the world. 626 00:39:22,563 --> 00:39:30,883 On a street like this every single night anyone can meet anyone and someone meets someone. 627 00:39:30,883 --> 00:39:33,283 It's all yours now. 628 00:39:35,723 --> 00:39:41,083 All of them. All the puffs, all the dykes and all the people in between. 629 00:39:41,083 --> 00:39:43,883 And this lot, they'll shag you,... 630 00:39:43,883 --> 00:39:47,843 ..they'll rob you, some of them might even love you. 631 00:39:47,843 --> 00:39:56,923 But they'll forget you in the end. Stick with your friends, you'll be fine. 632 00:39:52,723 --> 00:39:56,923 You fuck it up and I'll come back. 633 00:40:14,363 --> 00:40:16,363 (LAUGHS) 634 00:40:20,483 --> 00:40:23,563 Oh,... my... God ! 635 00:40:25,763 --> 00:40:28,483 # COUNTRY AND WESTERN DANCE MUSIC 636 00:41:11,443 --> 00:41:15,283 Faggots. 637 00:41:12,883 --> 00:41:15,283 Excuse me ? 638 00:41:15,283 --> 00:41:17,283 What did you say ? 639 00:41:17,283 --> 00:41:19,283 You heard me. 640 00:41:19,283 --> 00:41:23,763 Cos I'd better warn you, my friend has a hell of a temper. 641 00:41:23,763 --> 00:41:25,763 Once he's off... 642 00:41:25,763 --> 00:41:28,043 So, what did you say ? 643 00:41:28,043 --> 00:41:30,043 I said... 644 00:41:31,683 --> 00:41:33,803 ..faggots. 645 00:41:33,803 --> 00:41:35,803 What do you think ? 646 00:41:41,683 --> 00:41:44,083 Blood. 647 00:42:00,643 --> 00:42:02,643 Hold on a tick. 648 00:42:02,843 --> 00:42:06,163 Bit deaf, mate ! Too much clubbing. 649 00:42:06,163 --> 00:42:09,883 So, one more time, what did you say ? 650 00:42:10,083 --> 00:42:12,083 Uh,... 651 00:42:12,083 --> 00:42:14,083 ..nothing. 652 00:42:14,083 --> 00:42:17,323 One more word beginning with S. > 653 00:42:18,723 --> 00:42:20,883 Sorry. 654 00:42:30,883 --> 00:42:32,883 Maybe next time. 655 00:42:32,883 --> 00:42:34,883 Fuck off. 656 00:44:16,923 --> 00:44:20,803 Intelfax Subtitles ARA SHAH AND RICHARD ATHERTON