1
00:00:02,394 --> 00:00:04,652
♪ It seems today
that all you see ♪
2
00:00:04,730 --> 00:00:07,731
♪ Is violence in movies
and sex on TV ♪
3
00:00:07,824 --> 00:00:11,343
♪ But where are those
good old-fashioned values ♪
4
00:00:11,495 --> 00:00:14,346
♪ On which we used to rely? ♪
5
00:00:14,498 --> 00:00:17,832
♪ Lucky there's a family guy ♪
6
00:00:17,852 --> 00:00:21,411
♪ Lucky there's a man
who positively can do ♪
7
00:00:21,430 --> 00:00:22,855
♪ All the things that make us ♪
8
00:00:23,006 --> 00:00:24,172
♪ Laugh and cry ♪
9
00:00:24,266 --> 00:00:30,112
♪ He's... a...
Fam... ily... Guy! ♪
10
00:00:36,095 --> 00:00:39,613
Oh, good. Kids, you're
just in time for breakfast.
11
00:00:39,707 --> 00:00:41,948
No time, Mom. The girl I stalk
12
00:00:42,025 --> 00:00:43,934
has field hockey practice
at 8:00.
13
00:00:44,027 --> 00:00:46,861
I love a red-cheeked barbarian.
14
00:00:46,881 --> 00:00:48,029
How about you, Meg?
15
00:00:48,123 --> 00:00:50,941
Can't. I'm weirdly
the girl he's stalking.
16
00:00:51,034 --> 00:00:54,035
God help me,
I love the attention.
17
00:00:54,204 --> 00:00:55,612
Well, it's just you and me,
Stewie.
18
00:00:55,705 --> 00:00:57,114
What should we do today?
19
00:00:57,207 --> 00:00:59,783
I don't know, maybe forget
everything that just happened?
20
00:00:59,876 --> 00:01:00,967
All right, there he is.
21
00:01:01,120 --> 00:01:02,728
-Do you have his lunch ready?
-Lunch?
22
00:01:02,897 --> 00:01:05,898
This big boy has his first
whole day of preschool today.
23
00:01:06,049 --> 00:01:08,233
Oh, my God,
is it September already?
24
00:01:08,385 --> 00:01:10,977
Wow. So I have
the whole day to myself.
25
00:01:11,130 --> 00:01:12,646
Let's see. I...
26
00:01:12,798 --> 00:01:15,240
I guess I've got nothing to do
except create an excuse
27
00:01:15,467 --> 00:01:18,802
to touch the Target cashier lady
I want to run away with.
28
00:01:18,821 --> 00:01:21,080
That'll be $6.11.
29
00:01:21,248 --> 00:01:24,249
Oh, perfect.
I have a dime and a penny.
30
00:01:24,401 --> 00:01:26,993
They're right here, in my hand,
31
00:01:27,088 --> 00:01:28,587
for you to take.
32
00:01:28,738 --> 00:01:30,756
♪ ♪
33
00:01:39,825 --> 00:01:41,916
(quietly):
We could go to Montana.
34
00:01:41,936 --> 00:01:44,728
I want to, but I can't.
35
00:01:45,664 --> 00:01:47,981
(whirring)
36
00:01:49,276 --> 00:01:53,695
Esperanza,
it's time to get back to work.
37
00:01:54,949 --> 00:01:57,765
Lady! Wait!
38
00:01:57,860 --> 00:02:00,160
♪ ♪
39
00:02:06,535 --> 00:02:09,336
(whirring)
40
00:02:12,524 --> 00:02:13,281
No!
41
00:02:13,300 --> 00:02:15,859
Cinnamon-skinned Target lady!
42
00:02:16,028 --> 00:02:17,377
No!
43
00:02:17,471 --> 00:02:19,696
ANNOUNCER: Target.
Due to lesbian fantasies,
44
00:02:19,789 --> 00:02:21,640
we no longer accept change.
45
00:02:24,645 --> 00:02:26,478
Well, I have the whole day.
46
00:02:26,630 --> 00:02:28,480
I guess I can watch The Office
for so long
47
00:02:28,707 --> 00:02:32,025
that Netflix has to ask
if I'm still alive.
48
00:02:52,231 --> 00:02:54,564
-(knocking)
-JOE: Hey, Lois,
is everything okay?
49
00:02:54,658 --> 00:02:57,158
Uh, our Netflix says your
Netflix is worried about you.
50
00:02:57,178 --> 00:02:58,177
BRIAN:
Is that the delivery guy?
51
00:02:58,404 --> 00:03:00,070
Ooh, I hate him,
I hate him, I hate him!
52
00:03:00,163 --> 00:03:01,738
(barking)
53
00:03:01,831 --> 00:03:04,057
(grunting)
54
00:03:05,911 --> 00:03:07,911
(groaning)
55
00:03:07,930 --> 00:03:10,747
Oh, my God.
Oh, Brian, are you okay?!
56
00:03:10,766 --> 00:03:13,083
Oh, crap. I-I can't remember
57
00:03:13,085 --> 00:03:15,360
if doggy arms
are supposed to bend that way.
58
00:03:15,512 --> 00:03:16,511
(Brian groans)
59
00:03:16,530 --> 00:03:18,513
Okay, Bonnie might know
if doggy arms
60
00:03:18,532 --> 00:03:21,608
-are supposed to bend that way.
-(groans loudly)
61
00:03:21,760 --> 00:03:22,943
Hang on. She's responding.
62
00:03:23,095 --> 00:03:24,928
I can see the little dots
in the bubble.
63
00:03:25,021 --> 00:03:26,112
Oh, no, wait, she stopped.
64
00:03:26,265 --> 00:03:27,539
Oh, now she's typing again.
65
00:03:27,691 --> 00:03:28,540
(weakly):
Take me...
66
00:03:28,617 --> 00:03:30,375
Typing. Typing.
67
00:03:30,527 --> 00:03:31,451
Typing.
68
00:03:31,603 --> 00:03:32,694
...to a hospital.
69
00:03:32,713 --> 00:03:34,771
Oh, Bonnie doesn't have a dog.
70
00:03:34,790 --> 00:03:38,175
(grunting)
71
00:03:40,128 --> 00:03:42,295
I spy with my handicapable eye
72
00:03:42,448 --> 00:03:45,115
something for bulk trash day!
73
00:03:45,133 --> 00:03:47,041
Yeah, you know what?
This thing's a piece of junk.
74
00:03:47,061 --> 00:03:48,376
Worked one time.
75
00:03:48,545 --> 00:03:50,971
Peter, you're throwing
this Ping-Pong table out?
76
00:03:51,065 --> 00:03:52,122
Can I have it?
77
00:03:52,140 --> 00:03:53,457
Sure, it's all yours.
78
00:03:53,567 --> 00:03:55,067
Mattress? Mattress?
79
00:03:55,218 --> 00:03:56,884
Anyone throwing away a mattress?
80
00:03:56,962 --> 00:03:57,961
Eh, what size?
81
00:03:58,054 --> 00:03:59,479
I don't know. Van size?
82
00:03:59,573 --> 00:04:01,031
Whatever size that is.
83
00:04:04,894 --> 00:04:05,893
Hello!
84
00:04:05,913 --> 00:04:07,412
Broken arm, huh?
(clicks tongue)
85
00:04:07,639 --> 00:04:08,580
That's no fun.
86
00:04:08,657 --> 00:04:10,582
Hey! Get out of here!
87
00:04:10,734 --> 00:04:13,252
Uh, you didn't give him
the combination to the lock
88
00:04:13,328 --> 00:04:14,978
on your garbage shed, did you?
89
00:04:14,997 --> 00:04:16,571
-No.
-Good.
90
00:04:16,665 --> 00:04:19,833
Anyhorse, that arm looks broken.
91
00:04:19,985 --> 00:04:21,576
We'll have to get you
some painkillers.
92
00:04:21,670 --> 00:04:23,153
I'm just gonna open this drawer
93
00:04:23,246 --> 00:04:24,671
that doesn't have the mechanism
94
00:04:24,823 --> 00:04:27,224
that stops it
from pulling all the way out.
95
00:04:28,084 --> 00:04:29,159
Ah! Darn it.
96
00:04:29,252 --> 00:04:30,994
Hey, I heard a crash in here.
97
00:04:31,013 --> 00:04:32,846
I, uh... I'm gonna need
that shed password
98
00:04:32,998 --> 00:04:34,273
to throw everything away,
though.
99
00:04:34,441 --> 00:04:35,832
Four, two...
100
00:04:35,925 --> 00:04:37,167
Isn't that the same raccoon?
101
00:04:37,185 --> 00:04:39,987
No. (chuckles)
This one actually works here.
102
00:04:43,842 --> 00:04:46,176
Guys, there's something
going on across the street.
103
00:04:46,269 --> 00:04:48,787
Did that cocky jogger
finally get hit by a car?
104
00:04:49,014 --> 00:04:51,197
Nope. I outran them.
105
00:04:51,350 --> 00:04:53,292
SINGERS:
♪ Cocky jogger. ♪
106
00:04:53,443 --> 00:04:55,035
Mile 13!
107
00:04:55,111 --> 00:04:58,672
-(Ping-Pong ball bouncing)
-Dad, isn't that
our Ping-Pong table?
108
00:05:00,025 --> 00:05:01,282
(cheering)
109
00:05:01,376 --> 00:05:02,968
I don't know. Let me imagine it
110
00:05:03,119 --> 00:05:05,045
with lots of paint cans
on top of it.
111
00:05:05,197 --> 00:05:06,638
Hey, that's ours!
112
00:05:08,534 --> 00:05:09,975
(cheering)
113
00:05:10,126 --> 00:05:11,476
Wow, Cleveland,
looks like you got
114
00:05:11,628 --> 00:05:13,219
the most popular place
on the block.
115
00:05:13,388 --> 00:05:14,813
You really fixed this thing up.
116
00:05:14,890 --> 00:05:15,963
Can I play winner?
117
00:05:16,041 --> 00:05:17,707
Uh, yeah, there's a line, bub.
118
00:05:17,801 --> 00:05:21,570
The line starts all the way back
in that burning barn.
119
00:05:22,972 --> 00:05:25,198
Hey, no cuts!
120
00:05:29,496 --> 00:05:30,554
Aw, poor Brian.
121
00:05:30,572 --> 00:05:32,998
Have your pain meds
kicked in yet?
122
00:05:34,001 --> 00:05:35,483
Ho, yeah.
123
00:05:35,561 --> 00:05:36,668
How does it feel?
124
00:05:36,820 --> 00:05:38,170
Ho, yeah.
125
00:05:38,321 --> 00:05:39,729
Where are you going?
126
00:05:39,748 --> 00:05:41,081
Ho, yeah.
127
00:05:41,233 --> 00:05:43,675
Huh. I want to "ho, yeah."
128
00:05:43,902 --> 00:05:44,968
(rattling)
129
00:05:45,995 --> 00:05:48,472
Maybe just a half of a half,
huh?
130
00:05:49,499 --> 00:05:51,999
♪ ♪
131
00:05:52,094 --> 00:05:53,910
(sighs contentedly)
132
00:05:53,929 --> 00:05:56,096
What? Wh-Where am I?
133
00:05:56,190 --> 00:05:58,098
You're on my head, Lois.
134
00:05:58,266 --> 00:06:00,007
(gasps)
Chris Daughtry?
135
00:06:00,027 --> 00:06:01,526
That's right, Lois.
136
00:06:01,603 --> 00:06:03,695
Would you like
to glide around on my head
137
00:06:03,922 --> 00:06:05,179
like an air hockey puck?
138
00:06:05,199 --> 00:06:06,423
Forever?
139
00:06:06,441 --> 00:06:09,701
Just until I have to do
a smoke-inside concert
140
00:06:09,928 --> 00:06:11,444
at an Indian casino.
141
00:06:11,597 --> 00:06:13,020
Oh, that must be soon.
142
00:06:13,040 --> 00:06:15,765
Every 45 minutes.
143
00:06:15,784 --> 00:06:16,766
Oh!
144
00:06:16,785 --> 00:06:19,086
(giggling)
145
00:06:20,697 --> 00:06:21,863
Ah...
146
00:06:22,031 --> 00:06:26,051
A thousand bucks a show
split six ways.
147
00:06:28,947 --> 00:06:31,640
(humming softly)
148
00:06:32,709 --> 00:06:34,951
Hey, Peter's underwear.
149
00:06:34,953 --> 00:06:36,970
You've been through a lot, huh?
150
00:06:37,064 --> 00:06:39,731
I'm gonna fold you nice.
151
00:06:41,810 --> 00:06:44,403
(humming)
152
00:06:46,573 --> 00:06:49,032
(humming)
153
00:06:54,306 --> 00:06:56,206
(satisfied):
Ah.
154
00:06:57,066 --> 00:06:58,733
(humming)
155
00:06:58,752 --> 00:07:01,920
(vocalizing softly)
156
00:07:02,105 --> 00:07:04,238
Hello. I'm Neil deGrasse Tyson.
157
00:07:04,332 --> 00:07:06,816
What Lois just did
isn't possible.
158
00:07:06,818 --> 00:07:08,075
Or is it?
159
00:07:08,095 --> 00:07:11,263
Let's spend an hour
of Fox's money to find out.
160
00:07:21,166 --> 00:07:22,666
Well, it's 3:50.
161
00:07:22,684 --> 00:07:23,442
That's basically 4:00.
162
00:07:23,593 --> 00:07:24,668
I mean, in some cultures,
163
00:07:24,761 --> 00:07:27,003
it's polite to do things
ten minutes early.
164
00:07:27,172 --> 00:07:29,339
You know,
if it's good with water,
165
00:07:29,474 --> 00:07:31,524
it'd be even better with wine,
huh?
166
00:07:31,677 --> 00:07:33,660
Just like Jesus says.
167
00:07:36,773 --> 00:07:38,290
(gasps)
168
00:07:38,441 --> 00:07:40,792
B-B-Brian, Brian,
was that the last pill?
169
00:07:40,944 --> 00:07:42,276
(slurps loudly)
170
00:07:42,370 --> 00:07:44,871
Yes. But that's fine,
'cause my arm's all better.
171
00:07:45,023 --> 00:07:46,631
Oh, so now you're a doctor?
172
00:07:46,783 --> 00:07:48,467
Of letters, from Hofstra, yes.
173
00:07:48,618 --> 00:07:50,877
Yeah, well-well-well-well,
there's nothing I love more
174
00:07:51,029 --> 00:07:52,787
than my dog Brian and
I'm not gonna take the chance
175
00:07:52,864 --> 00:07:55,122
that he doesn't have
enough pills just in case.
176
00:07:55,142 --> 00:07:57,383
Lois, I'm good. I don't want
to get hooked on those things.
177
00:07:57,478 --> 00:08:01,271
Who wants to go
for a ride in the car?
178
00:08:02,799 --> 00:08:03,707
(tires screech)
179
00:08:03,725 --> 00:08:05,208
-(tires screech)
-(horn honks)
180
00:08:05,227 --> 00:08:08,044
-Hey! Dr. Griffin!
-Yeah, Hofstra!
181
00:08:08,213 --> 00:08:11,323
ANNOUNCER: Hofstra.
Pets need safety schools, too.
182
00:08:16,238 --> 00:08:17,311
(sighs)
183
00:08:17,331 --> 00:08:19,480
Okay. Time to play another round
184
00:08:19,500 --> 00:08:22,501
of expiration date roulette
with this salami.
185
00:08:22,652 --> 00:08:24,836
(Ping-Pong ball bouncing)
186
00:08:24,988 --> 00:08:26,838
God, that's annoying.
187
00:08:26,990 --> 00:08:28,064
(bouncing stops)
188
00:08:28,083 --> 00:08:29,341
(bouncing resumes)
189
00:08:29,568 --> 00:08:31,993
No problem. I can turn on
that one radio station
190
00:08:32,012 --> 00:08:34,012
that's just
religious Spanish shouting.
191
00:08:34,163 --> 00:08:37,682
MINISTER:
¡Jesucristo es el Señor
192
00:08:37,909 --> 00:08:39,759
del mundo!
193
00:08:39,911 --> 00:08:43,504
It's okay. I'm sure that noise
won't make me go insane.
194
00:08:43,524 --> 00:08:45,565
♪ ♪
195
00:08:46,527 --> 00:08:48,009
Peter?
196
00:08:48,028 --> 00:08:50,529
How's your new novel
coming along?
197
00:09:00,448 --> 00:09:02,666
♪ ♪
198
00:09:12,944 --> 00:09:14,110
-(yelps)
-Don't read that.
199
00:09:14,129 --> 00:09:16,054
It's still very rough.
200
00:09:18,875 --> 00:09:20,392
Okay, if anyone has drugs,
201
00:09:20,543 --> 00:09:22,877
it's high school kids
under the bleachers.
202
00:09:22,896 --> 00:09:24,396
Hey, daddy-os.
203
00:09:24,547 --> 00:09:26,565
Anyone want to blast off
to Mars?
204
00:09:26,716 --> 00:09:27,715
Uh, what?
205
00:09:27,734 --> 00:09:30,643
Well, what I'm saying is,
I'm Lucy.
206
00:09:30,796 --> 00:09:33,129
Where's the sky with diamonds?
207
00:09:33,148 --> 00:09:36,057
Excuse me, ma'am, are you lost?
208
00:09:36,151 --> 00:09:38,225
No, I want pills! Give me pills!
209
00:09:38,245 --> 00:09:40,153
Aren't you kids
doing drugs under here?
210
00:09:40,229 --> 00:09:41,821
No, we're picking up trash
211
00:09:41,973 --> 00:09:43,898
and organizing
a Black Lives Matter rally.
212
00:09:43,917 --> 00:09:45,809
Ugh! How could you be
so selfish?!
213
00:09:45,827 --> 00:09:46,901
Hey, daddy-os...
214
00:09:46,995 --> 00:09:48,144
They don't have drugs!
215
00:09:48,163 --> 00:09:50,130
Later, alligators.
216
00:09:53,760 --> 00:09:55,076
(cheering)
217
00:09:55,095 --> 00:09:57,095
Oh, Ping-Pong, huh? That's cute.
218
00:09:57,322 --> 00:09:59,505
Me, I like American games.
219
00:09:59,600 --> 00:10:01,341
Okay, I'll bite.
220
00:10:01,493 --> 00:10:03,084
No, I'm just saying
Ping-Pong's not bad,
221
00:10:03,178 --> 00:10:04,769
but I'll tell you
what's better--
222
00:10:04,921 --> 00:10:06,087
foosball.
223
00:10:06,106 --> 00:10:07,755
Isn't it generally agreed
that foosball,
224
00:10:07,774 --> 00:10:10,424
much like soccer,
originated in Western Europe?
225
00:10:10,518 --> 00:10:12,593
Isn't it generally agreed
a sphincter says, "What?"
226
00:10:12,687 --> 00:10:14,520
-No, it's not.
-What? Damn it!
227
00:10:14,673 --> 00:10:18,265
Hey, y'all! Come and get
your A&W cream soda floats!
228
00:10:18,285 --> 00:10:19,618
-(cheering)
-(chuckles): Holy crap!
229
00:10:19,769 --> 00:10:21,953
That's a huge frickin' brand!
230
00:10:22,105 --> 00:10:24,180
Long spoon? Long spoon?
231
00:10:24,199 --> 00:10:26,349
Long spoon
to keep your knuckles dry?
232
00:10:26,368 --> 00:10:27,274
(scraping)
233
00:10:27,327 --> 00:10:29,519
Okay. Thank you so much,
Cleveland,
234
00:10:29,537 --> 00:10:32,705
for taking care of my Ping-Pong
table for the last few days.
235
00:10:32,799 --> 00:10:34,281
I'll be taking it back now.
236
00:10:34,376 --> 00:10:35,541
(crowd murmuring)
237
00:10:35,694 --> 00:10:38,136
Now, Peter, just because
Cleveland had the vision
238
00:10:38,305 --> 00:10:40,546
to see the potential in
your Ping-Pong table you didn't,
239
00:10:40,623 --> 00:10:43,141
that doesn't mean you have
the right to take it back.
240
00:10:43,368 --> 00:10:45,702
-Yeah? Says who?
-Says the landmark case
241
00:10:45,720 --> 00:10:49,397
One Man's Trash
v. Another Man's Treasure.
242
00:10:58,141 --> 00:10:59,991
Hard-shell tacos, y'all.
243
00:11:00,218 --> 00:11:01,567
-Oh, yeah.
-Whoa, whoa, whoa.
244
00:11:01,662 --> 00:11:03,736
What's the brand
on those shells?
245
00:11:03,889 --> 00:11:04,996
Old El Paso.
246
00:11:05,148 --> 00:11:08,625
Oh, baby. Huge brand.
247
00:11:11,396 --> 00:11:14,172
Damn it, there's got to be
one more pill in here somewhere.
248
00:11:14,341 --> 00:11:15,899
I mean, maybe there's one
that got stuck
249
00:11:15,901 --> 00:11:17,901
in a drawer or something.
250
00:11:17,903 --> 00:11:19,511
Okay. Here, Stewie.
251
00:11:19,662 --> 00:11:21,012
Time to get nice and clean
in your bath
252
00:11:21,164 --> 00:11:22,347
while Mommy gets on her knees
253
00:11:22,574 --> 00:11:24,683
and Tara Reids
around the bathroom.
254
00:11:24,759 --> 00:11:26,834
Uh, there's no water in here.
255
00:11:26,928 --> 00:11:30,522
All right, let's see.
(gasps)
256
00:11:30,598 --> 00:11:32,006
Here it is.
(laughs)
257
00:11:32,100 --> 00:11:33,674
How's the temperature, sweetie?
258
00:11:33,694 --> 00:11:35,026
Of what? The air?
259
00:11:35,219 --> 00:11:37,028
Okay, I just need some water.
260
00:11:37,180 --> 00:11:38,488
Yeah, me, too.
261
00:11:43,870 --> 00:11:45,595
(gasps)
Oh, my God.
262
00:11:45,764 --> 00:11:46,946
That's the last pill.
263
00:11:47,098 --> 00:11:48,765
(grunts)
264
00:11:48,783 --> 00:11:50,542
Oh, damn it, my hand's too big.
265
00:11:50,693 --> 00:11:52,452
It won't fit.
266
00:11:52,620 --> 00:11:57,623
Oh, Stewie, you know how you
missed your last swim lesson?
267
00:11:57,700 --> 00:12:00,944
Yeah, we could do a little
makeup class, huh?
268
00:12:00,962 --> 00:12:02,703
Wait, what's happening?
No, no, no, no, no, no, no!
269
00:12:02,797 --> 00:12:06,540
Well, you know how Teacher Amy
has you dive for rings?
270
00:12:06,634 --> 00:12:08,634
Well, this is like that,
except it's a pill
271
00:12:08,729 --> 00:12:10,303
and it's not okay
if you don't get it.
272
00:12:10,397 --> 00:12:12,230
Aah! Damn you!
273
00:12:12,381 --> 00:12:15,291
Come on, come on,
you just touched it!
274
00:12:15,293 --> 00:12:17,068
What's all the yelling...?
Oh, my God, Lois,
275
00:12:17,295 --> 00:12:19,479
-what are you doing?
-(grunts)
276
00:12:19,631 --> 00:12:21,314
(coughing)
277
00:12:21,466 --> 00:12:24,358
First there wasn't enough water,
then there was too much.
278
00:12:24,469 --> 00:12:28,137
(crying):
I just wanted the pill.
279
00:12:28,156 --> 00:12:29,563
Lois, you need help.
280
00:12:29,583 --> 00:12:31,732
I'm sorry, but there's
only one thing to do.
281
00:12:31,826 --> 00:12:33,476
I have one pill left.
282
00:12:33,495 --> 00:12:35,670
It's in my crate
and you may have it.
283
00:12:37,740 --> 00:12:40,258
(exhales)
Brian, I don't see it.
284
00:12:40,427 --> 00:12:41,818
(door closes)
285
00:12:41,836 --> 00:12:44,429
What are you doing?
Let me out of here, Brian.
286
00:12:44,656 --> 00:12:46,931
Help! Somebody help me!
287
00:12:47,100 --> 00:12:50,343
I'd stop, but my VO2 max rate
is 70.
288
00:12:50,437 --> 00:12:51,936
I-Is that good?
289
00:12:52,088 --> 00:12:54,330
(chuckles)
"Is that good?"
290
00:12:54,332 --> 00:12:56,590
SINGERS:
♪ Cocky jogger. ♪
291
00:12:56,610 --> 00:12:58,193
See you at the finish line.
292
00:13:04,025 --> 00:13:06,951
Brian, unlock this cage.
293
00:13:07,028 --> 00:13:08,694
I'm sorry,
I can't do that, Lois.
294
00:13:08,847 --> 00:13:10,271
You're an addict,
and I'm the reason those pills
295
00:13:10,290 --> 00:13:11,790
were in the house to begin with.
296
00:13:11,941 --> 00:13:13,516
So I'm gonna get you
through this.
297
00:13:13,535 --> 00:13:16,127
The most important thing
is you getting better.
298
00:13:17,689 --> 00:13:20,114
Stewie? Stewie.
299
00:13:20,208 --> 00:13:24,710
Help Mommy out
and just open the latch, huh?
300
00:13:24,805 --> 00:13:27,305
Stewie. Stewie?
301
00:13:27,456 --> 00:13:29,866
Stewie? Stewie?
302
00:13:29,884 --> 00:13:32,459
Stewie? Stew?
303
00:13:32,479 --> 00:13:34,795
Stew? Stew?
304
00:13:34,815 --> 00:13:37,390
Stewie? Stewie?
305
00:13:37,466 --> 00:13:39,818
Stewie? Sweetie?
306
00:13:40,045 --> 00:13:42,712
Stewie? Stewie?
307
00:13:42,805 --> 00:13:45,231
Stewie. Stewie.
308
00:13:45,383 --> 00:13:46,732
Stewie?
309
00:13:46,885 --> 00:13:49,143
Stew? Stewart?
310
00:13:49,204 --> 00:13:51,737
Stew? Stewie?
311
00:13:51,832 --> 00:13:54,390
Stewie? Stewie?
312
00:13:54,483 --> 00:13:55,575
Stewie.
313
00:13:55,727 --> 00:13:58,077
Stewie. Stewie.
314
00:13:58,229 --> 00:14:00,338
-Stewie...
-HEADPHONES: Noise canceling on.
315
00:14:00,565 --> 00:14:02,915
NARRATOR:
Audible presents
Times We've Been Nude
316
00:14:03,068 --> 00:14:04,567
by all three Hemsworths.
317
00:14:04,569 --> 00:14:05,844
CHRIS HEMSWORTH:
G'day, Liam.
318
00:14:05,995 --> 00:14:07,737
I'm about to take
me trousers off.
319
00:14:07,830 --> 00:14:09,238
NARRATOR:
Said Chris Hemsworth.
320
00:14:09,332 --> 00:14:10,907
Liam Hemsworth replied...
321
00:14:10,925 --> 00:14:12,592
LIAM HEMSWORTH:
Oh, Chris, you startled me.
322
00:14:12,760 --> 00:14:15,578
I was in the process
of taking my trousers off.
323
00:14:15,597 --> 00:14:18,523
MAN:
I'm the third one,
and I'm trouserless, too.
324
00:14:18,674 --> 00:14:20,416
NARRATOR:
Said the third one,
holding the trousers
325
00:14:20,435 --> 00:14:23,111
that the other two
bought for him.
326
00:14:25,940 --> 00:14:28,533
(whimpering softly)
327
00:14:28,760 --> 00:14:30,660
(grunting)
328
00:14:37,377 --> 00:14:40,253
I have some coupons for these.
329
00:14:41,122 --> 00:14:43,030
This coupon is expired.
330
00:14:43,049 --> 00:14:44,774
Well, try another one.
331
00:14:44,867 --> 00:14:47,218
(beeping)
332
00:14:47,445 --> 00:14:50,279
(distorted): All of these
coupons are expired.
333
00:14:50,298 --> 00:14:52,448
(echoing):
Expired. Expired. Expired.
334
00:14:52,467 --> 00:14:55,134
-But, but...
-Looks like someone
335
00:14:55,228 --> 00:14:57,378
didn't study for groceries.
336
00:14:57,472 --> 00:15:00,289
-(giggling)
-No, I-I studied.
337
00:15:00,383 --> 00:15:01,882
Also, you're naked
and you're falling
338
00:15:01,976 --> 00:15:03,159
and you're falling
and you're falling
339
00:15:03,161 --> 00:15:05,153
and your teeth
are coming out, too.
340
00:15:12,987 --> 00:15:15,413
(screams)
341
00:15:17,250 --> 00:15:18,474
♪ ♪
342
00:15:18,567 --> 00:15:21,144
Daddy, will you come
to my recital?
343
00:15:21,162 --> 00:15:24,255
Can't you see I'm busy?
God, so needy.
344
00:15:24,482 --> 00:15:27,150
She'll probably end up with
the first fat slob she meets.
345
00:15:27,168 --> 00:15:28,651
(piano keys striking)
346
00:15:28,653 --> 00:15:30,637
(screams)
347
00:15:34,434 --> 00:15:38,269
Let's start a life together.
I have 42 VHS tapes.
348
00:15:38,421 --> 00:15:42,331
They're movies taped off the TV,
so they all have commercials.
349
00:15:42,350 --> 00:15:43,316
(shouts)
350
00:15:47,763 --> 00:15:51,265
MAN:
Lois, you stand
on trial for drug use
351
00:15:51,434 --> 00:15:53,843
prompted by mom-related boredom.
352
00:15:53,861 --> 00:15:57,455
This council has no hesitation
in pronouncing you...
353
00:15:57,682 --> 00:16:00,016
-Guilty.
-Guilty.
354
00:16:00,109 --> 00:16:01,608
(speaks inaudibly)
355
00:16:01,628 --> 00:16:04,187
Y-You're on mute, Jor-El.
356
00:16:04,280 --> 00:16:08,574
Jor-El, y-you have
to unmute yourself.
357
00:16:08,726 --> 00:16:10,969
-(clicks)
-Dur, sorry.
Can you hear me now?
358
00:16:11,196 --> 00:16:13,304
Yeah, yeah, o-okay, we got you.
359
00:16:13,531 --> 00:16:15,556
Okay. Guilty.
360
00:16:25,301 --> 00:16:28,711
(screams)
I don't know this reference!
361
00:16:28,730 --> 00:16:32,156
Is this from a Spider-Man?
362
00:16:37,905 --> 00:16:39,889
CLEVELAND:
What took you so long?
363
00:16:39,907 --> 00:16:41,907
You dragged all that stuff
out to your lawn
364
00:16:42,060 --> 00:16:43,317
just waiting for this moment?
365
00:16:43,336 --> 00:16:46,820
Nah, I'm getting a jump
on the next big trash day.
366
00:16:46,840 --> 00:16:48,414
So, what,
you're mad 'cause people
367
00:16:48,566 --> 00:16:50,733
have been enjoying
my Ping-Pong table?
368
00:16:50,826 --> 00:16:53,327
No, I'm mad they've been
enjoying my Ping-Pong table.
369
00:16:53,346 --> 00:16:56,239
-Peter, you're acting
like a child.
-No, I'm not.
370
00:16:56,332 --> 00:16:58,407
So let's solve this
like children.
371
00:16:58,426 --> 00:17:00,426
A game of Ping-Pong
for the table.
372
00:17:00,520 --> 00:17:02,687
Whoever wins keeps it.
373
00:17:03,765 --> 00:17:05,189
You're on.
374
00:17:08,194 --> 00:17:10,086
Oh, wait, if we want
to have a fair match,
375
00:17:10,104 --> 00:17:12,196
we're gonna need a referee.
376
00:17:12,348 --> 00:17:13,698
What took you so long?
377
00:17:13,925 --> 00:17:15,366
CHRIS:
It's my third time tonight
378
00:17:15,535 --> 00:17:16,942
so it's taking longer.
379
00:17:17,037 --> 00:17:19,095
Not you, Chris.
380
00:17:19,113 --> 00:17:21,205
("I Still Believe"
by Tim Cappello playing)
381
00:17:27,288 --> 00:17:29,772
♪ I been in a cave ♪
382
00:17:29,791 --> 00:17:31,774
♪ 40 days ♪
383
00:17:31,793 --> 00:17:33,033
♪ Only a spark ♪
384
00:17:33,127 --> 00:17:35,294
♪ To light my way ♪
385
00:17:35,446 --> 00:17:38,038
♪ I want to give out ♪
386
00:17:38,058 --> 00:17:39,891
♪ I want to give in ♪
387
00:17:40,042 --> 00:17:42,060
♪ This is our crime ♪
388
00:17:42,136 --> 00:17:44,896
♪ This is our sin ♪
389
00:17:45,047 --> 00:17:47,123
♪ But I still believe ♪
390
00:17:47,125 --> 00:17:48,900
♪ I still believe ♪
391
00:17:49,051 --> 00:17:50,810
♪ Through the pain ♪
392
00:17:50,962 --> 00:17:53,629
♪ And through the grief ♪
393
00:17:53,722 --> 00:17:58,076
♪ Through the lies,
through the storms ♪
394
00:17:58,244 --> 00:18:00,745
♪ Through the cries ♪
395
00:18:00,896 --> 00:18:01,895
♪ And through the wars ♪
396
00:18:01,989 --> 00:18:04,457
♪ Oh, I still believe ♪
397
00:18:10,982 --> 00:18:12,632
♪ I still believe. ♪
398
00:18:29,684 --> 00:18:31,758
(cheering, applause)
399
00:18:31,853 --> 00:18:33,260
(panting)
400
00:18:33,354 --> 00:18:37,031
All right, Peter, game point.
401
00:18:43,698 --> 00:18:45,081
(exhales)
402
00:18:46,626 --> 00:18:48,626
♪ ♪
403
00:18:58,621 --> 00:19:00,555
(snarling)
404
00:19:03,217 --> 00:19:05,626
CLEVELAND:
I gave Peter
the biggest softball tee
405
00:19:05,720 --> 00:19:07,887
you could possibly
give to an opponent,
406
00:19:07,981 --> 00:19:09,555
giving him the advantage.
407
00:19:09,724 --> 00:19:11,874
The truth is,
after the first day,
408
00:19:11,967 --> 00:19:15,302
Ping-Pong was the greatest thing
that had ever happened to me.
409
00:19:15,396 --> 00:19:18,489
But by day five, I was so sick
of playing Ping-Pong
410
00:19:18,641 --> 00:19:21,217
and having people at my house,
I was ready
411
00:19:21,386 --> 00:19:24,144
to shove that bitch
into the Fargo wood chipper.
412
00:19:24,238 --> 00:19:25,746
(spectators gasping)
413
00:19:28,817 --> 00:19:32,152
(groaning, whimpering)
414
00:19:32,172 --> 00:19:34,488
I'm sorry about the table,
Cleveland.
415
00:19:34,507 --> 00:19:36,674
And I'm sorry
I've been such a jerk.
416
00:19:36,901 --> 00:19:38,083
It's okay.
417
00:19:38,236 --> 00:19:39,919
I can't believe
we let a silly table
418
00:19:40,071 --> 00:19:42,096
come between our friendship.
419
00:19:43,850 --> 00:19:45,774
Ladies and gentlemen,
we have a draw.
420
00:19:45,776 --> 00:19:49,395
-Oh, come on.
-Yeah, well,
it was a waste of time.
421
00:19:52,174 --> 00:19:53,933
So, who gets
the Ping-Pong table?
422
00:19:54,085 --> 00:19:56,101
I guess it's no one's table now.
423
00:19:56,254 --> 00:19:57,570
That's all I wanted.
424
00:20:05,263 --> 00:20:08,689
(grunts)
My head.
425
00:20:08,708 --> 00:20:10,783
Brian, you stayed by my side
426
00:20:10,935 --> 00:20:12,859
-all night long?
-I did.
427
00:20:12,879 --> 00:20:16,439
It's kind of what dogs do.
428
00:20:16,532 --> 00:20:17,957
Paw.
429
00:20:18,109 --> 00:20:21,636
Good dog, Brian. Very good dog.
430
00:20:25,874 --> 00:20:28,226
♪ ♪
431
00:20:35,235 --> 00:20:38,461
Alexa, play music
that sounds like I'm on drugs.
432
00:20:38,554 --> 00:20:40,905
ALEXA:
Playing the last
45 quavery seconds
433
00:20:41,132 --> 00:20:42,798
of "Crimson and Clover."
434
00:20:42,800 --> 00:20:45,651
♪ Crimson and clover ♪
435
00:20:45,803 --> 00:20:48,729
♪ Over and over ♪
436
00:20:48,748 --> 00:20:51,565
♪ Crimson and clover ♪
437
00:20:51,584 --> 00:20:54,085
♪ Over and over ♪
438
00:20:54,312 --> 00:20:57,237
♪ Crimson and clover ♪
439
00:20:57,315 --> 00:20:59,507
♪ Over and over. ♪