1
00:00:02,752 --> 00:00:06,088
♪♪ It seems today
that all you see ♪♪

2
00:00:06,172 --> 00:00:09,634
♪♪ Is violence in movies
and sex on TV ♪♪

3
00:00:09,717 --> 00:00:13,012
♪♪ But where are those good
old-fashioned values ♪♪

4
00:00:13,095 --> 00:00:15,765
♪♪ On which we used to rely? ♪♪

5
00:00:15,848 --> 00:00:19,352
♪♪ Lucky there's a family guy ♪♪

6
00:00:19,435 --> 00:00:22,855
♪♪ Lucky there's a man who
positively can do ♪♪

7
00:00:22,939 --> 00:00:24,357
♪♪ All the things
that make us ♪♪

8
00:00:24,440 --> 00:00:26,150
♪♪ Laugh and cry ♪♪

9
00:00:26,234 --> 00:00:31,030
♪♪ He's...
a... fam... ily... guy! ♪♪

10
00:00:37,203 --> 00:00:38,496
Ah, thanks for
coming, Lois.

11
00:00:38,579 --> 00:00:39,872
Mark's been trying
to get me

12
00:00:39,956 --> 00:00:41,666
to see his one-man
show for weeks.

13
00:00:41,749 --> 00:00:44,210
Oh, I think it's wonderful
you're supporting your old pal.

14
00:00:45,837 --> 00:00:47,922
Go long, Eddie, go long.

15
00:00:48,005 --> 00:00:49,674
Further, further.

16
00:00:49,757 --> 00:00:51,759
Ah...

17
00:00:51,843 --> 00:00:54,470
Life sure was crazy
growing up in Brooklyn.

18
00:00:54,554 --> 00:00:56,013
We had some real characters
in my neighborhood.

19
00:00:56,097 --> 00:00:57,557
Like Frank, the mailman.

20
00:00:57,640 --> 00:00:59,392
( in Brooklynese ):
Hey, Mark, the ants

21
00:00:59,475 --> 00:01:01,686
for your ant farm came today.

22
00:01:01,769 --> 00:01:03,729
( chuckles ): And my friend, Lonny,
that knucklehead.

23
00:01:03,813 --> 00:01:05,439
( with same accent ):
Yo, Marky!

24
00:01:05,523 --> 00:01:07,191
Let's play some b-ball.

25
00:01:07,275 --> 00:01:08,568
B-ball,
that's what we called it.

26
00:01:08,651 --> 00:01:10,278
B-ball.

27
00:01:10,361 --> 00:01:11,445
And my grandma.

28
00:01:11,529 --> 00:01:12,780
Boy, was she something else.

29
00:01:12,864 --> 00:01:14,156
( with same accent ):
Hey, Marky!

30
00:01:14,240 --> 00:01:16,325
Don't forget to take
your cod liver oil.

31
00:01:16,409 --> 00:01:18,327
( nervous coughs )

32
00:01:18,411 --> 00:01:19,871
Great job.

33
00:01:19,954 --> 00:01:21,914
God, what a piece
of self-indulgent crap.

34
00:01:21,998 --> 00:01:24,208
All the characters sounded
exactly the same.

35
00:01:24,292 --> 00:01:25,626
( in Brooklynese ):
Great show, Mark.

36
00:01:25,710 --> 00:01:27,086
( same accent ): Yeah, you captured
me perfectly.

37
00:01:27,170 --> 00:01:29,005
( same accent : Me, too.
You are so talented.

38
00:01:29,088 --> 00:01:31,090
That was awful.
You know, wi-with a little practice

39
00:01:31,174 --> 00:01:32,842
I could act circles
around that guy.

40
00:01:32,967 --> 00:01:36,053
Oh, yeah? Well, then,
put up or shut up.

41
00:01:36,137 --> 00:01:38,222
"This Thursday, auditions
for the Quahog School

42
00:01:38,306 --> 00:01:39,974
of Performing Arts'
upcoming semester."

43
00:01:40,057 --> 00:01:41,184
You should try out.

44
00:01:41,267 --> 00:01:43,019
Oh, you know, that's
not a bad idea, Lois.

45
00:01:43,102 --> 00:01:45,855
Okay, ready for the best acting
you've seen all night?

46
00:01:45,938 --> 00:01:47,398
Mark, wow.
What a journey.

47
00:01:47,481 --> 00:01:49,108
Thank you so much.

48
00:01:49,192 --> 00:01:51,694
I... Those three and a half hours
just flew by.

49
00:01:53,404 --> 00:01:55,364
Hey, Santos,
Pasqual, listen.

50
00:01:55,448 --> 00:01:57,992
You guys have done
such good work today

51
00:01:58,075 --> 00:01:59,744
I got a surprise for you.

52
00:01:59,827 --> 00:02:00,828
Doritos.

53
00:02:00,912 --> 00:02:03,164
Huh? Not now.
Later.

54
00:02:03,539 --> 00:02:07,251
( speaking Portuguese )

55
00:02:14,258 --> 00:02:16,302
MAN:
Help! Help!

56
00:02:16,385 --> 00:02:17,803
Oh, my God.

57
00:02:21,974 --> 00:02:23,226
( voice quivering :
Thank you.

58
00:02:23,309 --> 00:02:24,435
I was boogie boarding

59
00:02:24,519 --> 00:02:26,187
and I got sucked out
by the riptide.

60
00:02:26,270 --> 00:02:27,355
I thought I
was a dead man.

61
00:02:27,438 --> 00:02:28,439
Oh, you got to be starving.

62
00:02:28,523 --> 00:02:29,690
Here, eat these.

63
00:02:30,149 --> 00:02:32,235
( speaking Portuguese )

64
00:02:37,031 --> 00:02:39,659
Oh, my God, he was just floating
out there by himself?

65
00:02:39,742 --> 00:02:41,536
Yep, he was so grateful
I saved his life

66
00:02:41,619 --> 00:02:43,579
he invited us all over
for dinner tonight.

67
00:02:43,663 --> 00:02:45,331
-Oh, good, I don't have to cook.
-Oh, no, no.

68
00:02:45,414 --> 00:02:47,375
Go ahead and cook anyway, Lois,
and we'll throw it out.

69
00:02:47,458 --> 00:02:48,459
I don't want you to get rusty.

70
00:02:48,543 --> 00:02:49,544
Say, Peter?

71
00:02:49,669 --> 00:02:51,170
My audition's
coming up.

72
00:02:51,254 --> 00:02:52,880
W-Would you mind listening
to my monologue?

73
00:02:52,964 --> 00:02:55,049
Sure, buddy,
let's hear it.

74
00:02:57,343 --> 00:02:59,804
Julie, there's something I got
to tell you...

75
00:02:59,887 --> 00:03:01,556
Ha, that's awesome.
Go on.

76
00:03:01,639 --> 00:03:03,266
...um, uh, tell you.

77
00:03:03,349 --> 00:03:04,809
I-I saw Dr. Phil..."

78
00:03:04,892 --> 00:03:06,894
Wow, wow, yes, yes.
I love it.

79
00:03:06,978 --> 00:03:08,563
...Dr. Phillips today.

80
00:03:08,646 --> 00:03:10,523
I might not make
it to Christmas.

81
00:03:10,606 --> 00:03:11,941
Oh, yeah, drop the bomb.
Drop it.

82
00:03:12,024 --> 00:03:13,526
There's not a dry eye
in the house.

83
00:03:13,609 --> 00:03:14,986
Keep going.

84
00:03:15,069 --> 00:03:16,654
No, no, you know what?
I'm going to stop.

85
00:03:16,737 --> 00:03:17,905
Um, maybe we'll
work on it later.

86
00:03:17,989 --> 00:03:19,740
Okay, well, just
so you know, it was good

87
00:03:19,824 --> 00:03:21,200
but, uh, I was also being
pretty generous.

88
00:03:24,120 --> 00:03:25,997
Well, look at you,
you little jaybird.

89
00:03:26,080 --> 00:03:28,541
You want to tell your mommy
and daddy the Griffins are here?

90
00:03:28,624 --> 00:03:31,252
MAN:
Come on in!

91
00:03:31,335 --> 00:03:32,753
Welcome, Griffins.

92
00:03:32,837 --> 00:03:34,338
Oh, uh, uh...

93
00:03:34,422 --> 00:03:35,756
we must be early.

94
00:03:35,840 --> 00:03:37,341
WOMAN:
Oh, nonsense.

95
00:03:37,425 --> 00:03:38,968
You're right on time.

96
00:03:39,051 --> 00:03:40,511
Oh, my God,
she's got hair

97
00:03:40,595 --> 00:03:42,889
growing out of her boobs
and up to her head.

98
00:03:42,972 --> 00:03:45,516
You're, uh,
you're completely...

99
00:03:45,600 --> 00:03:47,643
Nude? Yes, we're nudists.

100
00:03:47,727 --> 00:03:49,187
Permission to freak out?

101
00:03:49,270 --> 00:03:50,605
Peter, did you know
about this?

102
00:03:50,688 --> 00:03:52,857
I-I thought he lost his
bathing suit in the ocean.

103
00:03:52,940 --> 00:03:55,443
So, you're the man who saved
my husband's life.

104
00:03:55,526 --> 00:03:56,694
Dotty Campbell.

105
00:03:56,777 --> 00:03:58,779
Oh, what am I doing?
Come here.

106
00:03:58,863 --> 00:04:00,198
Watch my hands, Lois.
Look, look.

107
00:04:00,281 --> 00:04:01,866
See where they are?
See? No touchy.

108
00:04:01,949 --> 00:04:04,202
And this is
the backyard.

109
00:04:04,285 --> 00:04:06,913
Feel that, that's premium
Blue-Tip Bermuda.

110
00:04:06,996 --> 00:04:08,331
Real hardy...
but soft.

111
00:04:08,414 --> 00:04:09,665
Oh, good Lord.

112
00:04:09,749 --> 00:04:11,042
Don't look directly
into it, Lois.

113
00:04:11,125 --> 00:04:12,919
The hot dogs
and burgers are ready.

114
00:04:13,002 --> 00:04:14,420
Can I get you
a beer, Peter?

115
00:04:14,504 --> 00:04:15,505
Uh, what have you got?

116
00:04:15,588 --> 00:04:16,589
I've got Busch.

117
00:04:16,672 --> 00:04:18,758
Oh, and Busch Lite.

118
00:04:18,841 --> 00:04:20,134
( car door slams )

119
00:04:20,218 --> 00:04:21,677
Oh, sounds like Jeff's home.

120
00:04:21,761 --> 00:04:23,679
Hey, sport, how'd you do?

121
00:04:23,763 --> 00:04:24,931
I got first place, Dad.

122
00:04:25,014 --> 00:04:26,641
Way to go, champ.

123
00:04:26,724 --> 00:04:29,560
Jeff plays varsity tennis
for St. Genevieve High.

124
00:04:29,644 --> 00:04:31,103
Oh, cool.

125
00:04:31,187 --> 00:04:32,772
Is this the biggest
thing you've ever seen?

126
00:04:32,855 --> 00:04:34,315
Hey, don't get too cocky.

127
00:04:34,398 --> 00:04:36,692
I had a big one like that
when I was your age.

128
00:04:36,776 --> 00:04:38,819
Oh, you were a showoff,
yourself, Dave.

129
00:04:38,903 --> 00:04:40,488
He brought it out
on our first date.

130
00:04:40,571 --> 00:04:41,739
Lois, I'm scared.

131
00:04:41,822 --> 00:04:42,949
Oh, I'll get that.

132
00:04:43,032 --> 00:04:44,033
Hey!

133
00:04:44,116 --> 00:04:45,117
Ah, oh, oh, God!

134
00:04:45,201 --> 00:04:46,202
Oh, Dave, sorry.

135
00:04:46,285 --> 00:04:47,286
Uh, oh, God.

136
00:04:49,121 --> 00:04:50,373
-Boobies!
-Chris, that's enough.

137
00:04:50,456 --> 00:04:51,916
Well, I'm sure glad
to be out of there.

138
00:04:51,999 --> 00:04:53,292
You said it, Lois.

139
00:04:53,376 --> 00:04:55,294
What those people
are doing just ain't natural.

140
00:04:55,378 --> 00:04:56,379
Boobies!

141
00:04:56,462 --> 00:04:57,922
Did you hear me, young man?

142
00:04:58,005 --> 00:04:59,257
I don't know what
the big deal was.

143
00:04:59,340 --> 00:05:00,550
-I thought they were nice.
-Boobies.

144
00:05:00,633 --> 00:05:02,552
-Peter?
-Do it.

145
00:05:04,971 --> 00:05:07,098
Did you have fun at the circus
today, Chris?

146
00:05:07,181 --> 00:05:09,183
Elephants are
bigger in person.

147
00:05:15,022 --> 00:05:16,858
Oh, break a leg
up there, Brian.

148
00:05:16,941 --> 00:05:18,943
You seem awfully
enthusiastic.

149
00:05:19,026 --> 00:05:20,486
Well, at first
I wanted you to fail.

150
00:05:20,570 --> 00:05:21,737
But then I realized

151
00:05:21,821 --> 00:05:23,531
you'd be out of the house
five days a week.

152
00:05:23,614 --> 00:05:26,534
Which means I'd me free to throw
some of my sexy parties.

153
00:05:26,617 --> 00:05:28,619
( all laughing )

154
00:05:28,703 --> 00:05:30,621
( music playing )

155
00:05:30,705 --> 00:05:32,707
( Stewie barks )

156
00:05:35,835 --> 00:05:37,712
( laughing continues )

157
00:05:37,795 --> 00:05:38,880
MAN:
Brian Griffin?

158
00:05:38,963 --> 00:05:40,089
Good luck, Brian.

159
00:05:40,173 --> 00:05:42,258
Uh, hi, I'm-I'm Brian Griffin.

160
00:05:42,341 --> 00:05:44,802
And this is from
John Walts' Leaving Wichita.

161
00:05:47,138 --> 00:05:49,765
Julie, there's something
I got to tell you.

162
00:05:49,849 --> 00:05:52,143
I saw Dr. Phillips today.

163
00:05:52,226 --> 00:05:54,562
I might not make it
to Christmas.

164
00:05:54,645 --> 00:05:56,480
( yawns ):
Thank you, next.

165
00:05:56,564 --> 00:05:59,567
Next? Now, ho-hold on, Brian.
Stay up there. Stay there.

166
00:05:59,650 --> 00:06:01,319
Now, see here.

167
00:06:01,402 --> 00:06:04,071
Brian Griffin is a brilliant
actor with talent and passion.

168
00:06:04,155 --> 00:06:06,782
But you alleged "experts"
obviously didn't notice.

169
00:06:06,866 --> 00:06:08,201
Well, I did notice.

170
00:06:08,284 --> 00:06:10,870
I saw a man bare his soul
up here.

171
00:06:10,953 --> 00:06:13,706
And his pain ran through my
heart like an errant locomotive.

172
00:06:13,789 --> 00:06:16,751
But it was wasted,
wasted on all of you.

173
00:06:18,503 --> 00:06:20,755
Well, it looks like we're going
to have to reconsider.

174
00:06:20,838 --> 00:06:21,881
Brian we want you...

175
00:06:21,964 --> 00:06:23,716
-Yes!
-...off the stage.

176
00:06:23,799 --> 00:06:26,177
But your young friend there
would make a perfect addition

177
00:06:26,260 --> 00:06:27,929
to the school's
Rising Star program.

178
00:06:28,012 --> 00:06:29,347
Oh, splendid.

179
00:06:29,430 --> 00:06:32,016
This calls for
a sexy party.

180
00:06:32,099 --> 00:06:35,561
( music plays )

181
00:06:39,899 --> 00:06:41,901
Okay, funcakes,
let's do a scene.

182
00:06:42,026 --> 00:06:43,027
Okay, uh, Stewie

183
00:06:43,110 --> 00:06:44,111
how about you?

184
00:06:44,195 --> 00:06:45,863
And, uh, let's see,
one of our veterans...

185
00:06:45,947 --> 00:06:47,073
um, Olivia.

186
00:06:47,156 --> 00:06:48,866
I'm not doing a scene with him.

187
00:06:48,950 --> 00:06:50,117
He's inexperienced.

188
00:06:50,201 --> 00:06:52,286
He'll drag
my whole performance down.

189
00:06:52,370 --> 00:06:53,371
Are you serious?

190
00:06:53,454 --> 00:06:54,580
Is she serious?

191
00:06:54,664 --> 00:06:55,665
Ah, okay, Stewie

192
00:06:55,748 --> 00:06:57,416
I'll give you a
solo exercise.

193
00:06:57,875 --> 00:06:59,001
Now, you're
going to do

194
00:06:59,085 --> 00:07:00,837
a little exercise
we call the "life cycle."

195
00:07:00,920 --> 00:07:02,171
Now, without using words

196
00:07:02,255 --> 00:07:04,090
you're going to act out
your entire life

197
00:07:04,173 --> 00:07:06,384
from birth to death,
exactly as I describe it.

198
00:07:06,467 --> 00:07:07,552
Okay, ready?
Lie down.

199
00:07:08,761 --> 00:07:10,221
Now, you're being born.

200
00:07:10,304 --> 00:07:12,431
Ready, and...
burst through the placenta!

201
00:07:12,515 --> 00:07:13,766
Whoo!

202
00:07:13,850 --> 00:07:14,934
Okay, now, fast-forward.

203
00:07:15,017 --> 00:07:16,519
It's your first day of school.

204
00:07:16,602 --> 00:07:17,645
You're alone
and scared.

205
00:07:17,728 --> 00:07:18,729
( gasps )

206
00:07:18,813 --> 00:07:20,064
But it's all right,
it's all right.

207
00:07:20,147 --> 00:07:21,190
-It's Sloppy Joe day.
-Oh!

208
00:07:21,274 --> 00:07:22,567
Okay, pull it back.

209
00:07:22,650 --> 00:07:25,069
The lady touched the bun,
and she's not wearing gloves.

210
00:07:25,152 --> 00:07:27,655
-Ooh!
-Okay, fast-forward. You're a businessman.

211
00:07:27,738 --> 00:07:29,240
You manage a lot of people.

212
00:07:29,323 --> 00:07:32,076
And here comes Henderson,
and he lost the big account.

213
00:07:32,159 --> 00:07:33,160
You're mad.

214
00:07:33,327 --> 00:07:34,328
Madder!

215
00:07:34,412 --> 00:07:35,955
Madder!

216
00:07:36,038 --> 00:07:37,331
Come on, hot, hot,
hot, hot, hot, ooh.

217
00:07:37,415 --> 00:07:38,457
Ooh, there it is,
you got it.

218
00:07:38,541 --> 00:07:39,584
And fast-forward.

219
00:07:39,667 --> 00:07:40,710
You're an
old man now.

220
00:07:40,793 --> 00:07:41,961
You're on your
death bed.

221
00:07:42,044 --> 00:07:43,880
Your son is there,
holding your hand.

222
00:07:43,963 --> 00:07:45,590
You tell him
you accept his lifestyle

223
00:07:45,673 --> 00:07:48,176
and regret humiliating him
at his only sister's wedding

224
00:07:48,259 --> 00:07:50,386
by introducing him as
your "other daughter."

225
00:07:50,469 --> 00:07:52,138
And... scene.

226
00:07:52,221 --> 00:07:53,389
Okay, any comments?

227
00:07:55,183 --> 00:07:57,101
You are the weakest link.

228
00:07:57,185 --> 00:07:58,311
Good-bye.

229
00:07:58,394 --> 00:07:59,478
( laughter )

230
00:07:59,562 --> 00:08:00,730
( laughing )

231
00:08:00,813 --> 00:08:02,190
Oh, gosh, that's funny.

232
00:08:02,273 --> 00:08:03,608
That's really fu...

233
00:08:03,691 --> 00:08:05,610
Do-Do you write
your own material?

234
00:08:05,693 --> 00:08:07,486
Do you?
Because that is so fresh.

235
00:08:07,570 --> 00:08:09,405
"You are the weakest link.
Good-bye."

236
00:08:09,488 --> 00:08:12,283
You know, I-I've never heard
anyone make that joke before.

237
00:08:12,366 --> 00:08:13,701
Hmm, you're the first.

238
00:08:13,784 --> 00:08:16,245
I've never heard anyone
reference... reference that

239
00:08:16,329 --> 00:08:17,538
outside the program before.

240
00:08:17,622 --> 00:08:20,249
Because th-that's what she says
on the show, right? Isn't it?

241
00:08:20,333 --> 00:08:22,210
"You are the Weakest Link.
Good-bye."

242
00:08:22,293 --> 00:08:25,755
And-And yet you've taken that
and-and used it out of context

243
00:08:26,297 --> 00:08:28,716
to insult me
in this everyday situation.

244
00:08:29,050 --> 00:08:32,011
God, what a clever,
smart girl you must be

245
00:08:32,094 --> 00:08:35,681
to come up with-with a joke
like that all by yourself.

246
00:08:35,765 --> 00:08:37,517
Hmm, that's so fresh, too.

247
00:08:37,600 --> 00:08:40,311
Any-Any Titanic jokes
you want to throw at me

248
00:08:40,436 --> 00:08:42,522
as long as we're hitting
these phenomena

249
00:08:42,605 --> 00:08:44,857
at the height
of their popularity? Hmm?

250
00:08:44,941 --> 00:08:46,025
'Cause I'm-I'm here.

251
00:08:46,901 --> 00:08:48,569
God, you're so funny!

252
00:08:52,323 --> 00:08:53,324
Jeff:
Meg?

253
00:08:53,407 --> 00:08:55,660
Jeff! Wow, hey,
what you doing here?

254
00:08:55,743 --> 00:08:57,954
They had a sale
on Super Soakers.

255
00:08:58,037 --> 00:08:59,372
Check it out.

256
00:08:59,455 --> 00:09:00,540
( laughing)

257
00:09:00,623 --> 00:09:02,124
Ah, what the heck?

258
00:09:02,208 --> 00:09:03,292
Nudist!

259
00:09:03,376 --> 00:09:05,211
My dad's a tailor,
you jerk!

260
00:09:06,087 --> 00:09:07,463
Oh, gosh, that's awful.

261
00:09:07,547 --> 00:09:08,840
Ah, that's all right.

262
00:09:08,923 --> 00:09:10,049
I'm used to it.

263
00:09:10,132 --> 00:09:11,676
Well, I better go.

264
00:09:11,759 --> 00:09:14,220
So, um, would
you want to do something sometime?

265
00:09:14,512 --> 00:09:15,847
Sure, that'd be great!

266
00:09:15,930 --> 00:09:17,515
Cool. I'll call
you later.

267
00:09:27,650 --> 00:09:30,736
Holy moley,
it must be my birthday.

268
00:09:34,115 --> 00:09:36,242
( blowing sounds )

269
00:09:38,744 --> 00:09:40,246
( flatulence )

270
00:09:41,622 --> 00:09:43,040
( embarrassed chuckle )

271
00:09:43,124 --> 00:09:44,667
Th... thank you.

272
00:09:44,750 --> 00:09:48,796
Thank you, that-that was...
um... "Me Farting"

273
00:09:48,880 --> 00:09:50,840
by... by Chopin.

274
00:09:50,923 --> 00:09:52,008
( chuckles )

275
00:09:52,091 --> 00:09:53,843
Thank-Thank you.

276
00:09:53,926 --> 00:09:55,219
Thank you ver...

277
00:09:55,303 --> 00:09:56,554
Thank you very...

278
00:10:00,224 --> 00:10:02,143
So, Olivia...
beautiful day.

279
00:10:02,226 --> 00:10:04,437
You're not going to
fart again, are you?

280
00:10:06,147 --> 00:10:08,524
Well, I'd love to stay and chat,
but you're a total bitch.

281
00:10:16,407 --> 00:10:18,534
WOMAN: The quarterly review's
tomorrow.

282
00:10:18,618 --> 00:10:19,952
Think all your kids
will pass?

283
00:10:20,036 --> 00:10:21,412
Well, I'll tell you
who's not going to pass.

284
00:10:21,495 --> 00:10:23,789
It starts with an "O"
and rhymes with Bolivia.

285
00:10:23,873 --> 00:10:24,999
Give up? Olivia.

286
00:10:25,082 --> 00:10:26,334
-Really?
-Oh, yeah.

287
00:10:26,417 --> 00:10:27,668
She's such
a little frosty box.

288
00:10:27,752 --> 00:10:28,878
She won't work
with anybody.

289
00:10:29,212 --> 00:10:30,713
And Stewie Griffin
is also on the fence.

290
00:10:30,796 --> 00:10:32,089
If he and Olivia
don't deliver

291
00:10:32,173 --> 00:10:34,133
at their quarterly reviews,
I'm just going to have

292
00:10:34,217 --> 00:10:35,927
to kick their cute
little bottoms out of here.

293
00:10:36,010 --> 00:10:37,011
( gasps )

294
00:10:41,557 --> 00:10:44,477
Uh, this table is reserved
for people with talent.

295
00:10:44,560 --> 00:10:45,770
Stow the 'tude,
queenie!

296
00:10:45,853 --> 00:10:47,396
You and I have
a problem!

297
00:10:47,480 --> 00:10:48,606
Read it and weep!

298
00:10:48,689 --> 00:10:50,274
"Doesn't work well
with others"?

299
00:10:50,358 --> 00:10:51,609
Yes, mine's no better.

300
00:10:51,734 --> 00:10:53,319
I'll spare you the details.

301
00:10:53,402 --> 00:10:55,571
Suffice it to say
the phrase "garden variety"

302
00:10:55,655 --> 00:10:56,948
appears a number of times.

303
00:10:57,031 --> 00:10:58,574
What am I going to do!

304
00:10:58,658 --> 00:11:00,034
What are we going to do?

305
00:11:00,117 --> 00:11:01,577
Look, our evaluation's tomorrow.

306
00:11:01,661 --> 00:11:03,329
You need someone to work with

307
00:11:03,412 --> 00:11:05,790
and, well, I need someone
to make me look good.

308
00:11:06,082 --> 00:11:07,124
I don't know...

309
00:11:07,208 --> 00:11:08,459
Well, fine,
refuse my offer

310
00:11:08,543 --> 00:11:11,170
get booted out of this place,
and wind up like Linda Evans.

311
00:11:11,254 --> 00:11:13,756
MAN ( over P.A. ) Linda Evans, we have
a spill in aisle nine.

312
00:11:13,840 --> 00:11:15,842
Linda Evans,
spill in aisle nine.

313
00:11:17,802 --> 00:11:20,137
Do you like yours
with crust or without?

314
00:11:20,221 --> 00:11:21,347
How do you like yours?

315
00:11:21,472 --> 00:11:23,182
Okay, let's both answer
at the same time.

316
00:11:23,891 --> 00:11:26,018
One, two, three.

317
00:11:26,102 --> 00:11:27,270
-Without.
-Without.

318
00:11:27,353 --> 00:11:29,647
Holy moley, that's eight things
we have in common!

319
00:11:29,730 --> 00:11:31,274
Kids, we're home.

320
00:11:31,399 --> 00:11:32,483
Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Griffin.

321
00:11:32,567 --> 00:11:33,943
You guys remember Jeff?

322
00:11:34,026 --> 00:11:35,653
Sure! Lois, I'm going
to borrow your mace.

323
00:11:36,195 --> 00:11:37,196
( screams )

324
00:11:37,280 --> 00:11:38,281
That's better.

325
00:11:38,364 --> 00:11:40,032
So, Meg,
did any of the neighbors

326
00:11:40,116 --> 00:11:41,409
see Jeff come over?

327
00:11:41,492 --> 00:11:43,953
Mom! Come on, Jeff,
let's go in the other room.

328
00:11:44,036 --> 00:11:45,621
Now, Meg, no need
to get so testes..

329
00:11:45,705 --> 00:11:46,706
uh, testy...

330
00:11:46,789 --> 00:11:47,790
Oh, nuts!

331
00:11:47,874 --> 00:11:48,916
I mean, crap!

332
00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:50,168
You want to sit down?

333
00:11:50,251 --> 00:11:51,252
Wait a second,
don't sit down yet.

334
00:11:52,837 --> 00:11:54,297
Dad, what are you doing?

335
00:11:54,380 --> 00:11:56,799
I'm, uh-uh,
keeping the couch fresh.

336
00:11:56,883 --> 00:11:58,467
-Dad!
-It's okay, Meg.

337
00:11:58,551 --> 00:12:00,970
I understand what's going
on here. I'm going to go.

338
00:12:01,053 --> 00:12:02,805
Oh! Just, uh-uh,
step on these coasters

339
00:12:02,889 --> 00:12:03,890
on your way out.

340
00:12:04,265 --> 00:12:05,391
Here we go, yeah.

341
00:12:05,474 --> 00:12:06,601
Yeah, d-don't step
on the hot lava.

342
00:12:06,684 --> 00:12:08,436
The carpet is hot lava.

343
00:12:09,562 --> 00:12:11,230
I can't believe you guys!

344
00:12:11,314 --> 00:12:13,900
Meg, how could you bring
that naked kid into our house?

345
00:12:13,983 --> 00:12:15,109
Because I like him.

346
00:12:15,193 --> 00:12:16,777
He remembers my name.

347
00:12:16,861 --> 00:12:18,362
Well, I'm sorry,
honey

348
00:12:18,446 --> 00:12:19,822
but we don't think
you should see him anymore.

349
00:12:19,906 --> 00:12:20,907
( gasps )

350
00:12:22,408 --> 00:12:24,327
Oh, I hate the sound
of her crying.

351
00:12:24,410 --> 00:12:25,953
You know what sounds
even worse?

352
00:12:26,329 --> 00:12:27,663
( annoying screech )

353
00:12:27,830 --> 00:12:29,123
Ah, listen to that.

354
00:12:29,207 --> 00:12:31,334
( screech )

355
00:12:31,542 --> 00:12:32,668
Don't you hate that?

356
00:12:32,793 --> 00:12:33,920
( screech )

357
00:12:34,045 --> 00:12:35,087
That is awful.

358
00:12:35,171 --> 00:12:36,297
( screech )

359
00:12:36,380 --> 00:12:37,507
I think it's easier on me

360
00:12:37,590 --> 00:12:39,091
'cause I'm the one
making the sound.

361
00:12:39,175 --> 00:12:41,052
( screeching )

362
00:12:43,471 --> 00:12:44,889
Okay, nice effort, Brad

363
00:12:44,972 --> 00:12:47,058
but, uh, let's remember
our performance hierarchy:

364
00:12:47,141 --> 00:12:49,644
legitimate theater,
musical theater, stand-up

365
00:12:49,727 --> 00:12:51,062
ventriloquism, magic, mime.

366
00:12:51,145 --> 00:12:52,605
All right,
next up is Olivia.

367
00:12:52,688 --> 00:12:55,233
Liv, what monologue
are you doing for us this time?

368
00:12:55,316 --> 00:12:57,985
I'm not doing a monologue,
I'm doing a piece with Stewie.

369
00:12:58,069 --> 00:12:59,403
A duet? Really?

370
00:12:59,487 --> 00:13:00,613
Well, let's see it.

371
00:13:00,696 --> 00:13:02,990
Uh, five, six,
seven, eight..

372
00:13:03,074 --> 00:13:05,076
( playful musical intro )

373
00:13:05,159 --> 00:13:08,204
♪♪ Who's got the
greatest gal around ♪♪

374
00:13:08,287 --> 00:13:09,455
You do.

375
00:13:09,539 --> 00:13:12,166
♪♪ Who's got
the sweetest man in town? ♪♪

376
00:13:12,250 --> 00:13:13,876
You do.

377
00:13:13,960 --> 00:13:17,421
♪♪ Who's got a guy
who makes her smile all day? ♪♪

378
00:13:17,505 --> 00:13:20,508
By the way, I'm not so bad
to look at either.

379
00:13:20,591 --> 00:13:23,010
♪♪ Who's got a guy
with lots of brains? ♪♪

380
00:13:23,094 --> 00:13:24,512
You do.

381
00:13:24,595 --> 00:13:26,222
♪♪ Who's got a girl
who loves chow mein ♪♪

382
00:13:26,305 --> 00:13:27,640
You do.

383
00:13:27,723 --> 00:13:30,101
♪♪ Who's got the greatest
love in the world? ♪♪

384
00:13:30,184 --> 00:13:31,227
You do.

385
00:13:31,310 --> 00:13:32,436
♪♪ And you do ♪♪

386
00:13:32,520 --> 00:13:34,188
♪♪ Thank goodness
I've got you ♪♪

387
00:13:34,272 --> 00:13:36,232
♪♪ Who's got a guy
to tell her jokes? ♪♪

388
00:13:36,315 --> 00:13:37,525
You do.

389
00:13:37,608 --> 00:13:40,236
♪♪ Who's got a girl
to show the folks? ♪♪

390
00:13:40,319 --> 00:13:41,904
You do.

391
00:13:41,988 --> 00:13:44,740
♪♪ Who's got a girl he'd
like to one day undress ♪♪

392
00:13:44,824 --> 00:13:46,158
♪♪ Give it a rest ♪♪

393
00:13:46,242 --> 00:13:49,120
♪♪ I told you not
until we're married ♪♪

394
00:13:49,203 --> 00:13:51,289
♪♪ Who's got the gal
with all the snazz? ♪♪

395
00:13:51,372 --> 00:13:52,498
You do.

396
00:13:52,582 --> 00:13:54,876
♪♪ Who's got the fella
with pizzazz? ♪♪

397
00:13:54,959 --> 00:13:56,335
You do.

398
00:13:56,419 --> 00:14:00,381
♪♪ Who's got the greatest love
in the world? ♪♪

399
00:14:00,464 --> 00:14:01,465
You do.

400
00:14:01,549 --> 00:14:02,717
And you do.

401
00:14:02,800 --> 00:14:05,094
♪♪ Thank goodness

402
00:14:05,178 --> 00:14:10,683
♪♪ I've got you. ♪♪

403
00:14:10,766 --> 00:14:12,768
( cheering )

404
00:14:12,852 --> 00:14:14,729
Watch this.
Are you watching?

405
00:14:14,812 --> 00:14:16,230
( loud slap )

406
00:14:16,314 --> 00:14:18,399
That's for me ever having
doubted you. "A" plus!

407
00:14:18,482 --> 00:14:20,943
And that's for you
wearing purple pants

408
00:14:21,027 --> 00:14:22,737
with blue socks. Ew!

409
00:14:23,070 --> 00:14:24,947
I totally called
him on it.

410
00:14:29,243 --> 00:14:30,494
Okay, no secrets.

411
00:14:30,578 --> 00:14:32,872
I want to share Stewie
and Olivia with the world.

412
00:14:32,955 --> 00:14:34,665
Well, they're
awfully young.

413
00:14:34,749 --> 00:14:36,167
Is this really
a good idea?

414
00:14:36,250 --> 00:14:37,543
It's a great idea.

415
00:14:37,627 --> 00:14:39,128
I've always dreamed
of becoming an actress

416
00:14:39,212 --> 00:14:41,380
but that's not why I'm
pushing Olivia to do it.

417
00:14:41,464 --> 00:14:43,591
Is it suspicious that I brought
that up unprovoked?

418
00:14:43,674 --> 00:14:45,718
Well, I guess
it might be okay.

419
00:14:45,801 --> 00:14:47,553
Sure, Lois, I mean,
look at Elroy Jetson.

420
00:14:47,637 --> 00:14:49,639
He was a child actor
and he turned out just fine.

421
00:14:49,722 --> 00:14:52,433
You know who I am?

422
00:14:52,517 --> 00:14:54,268
I'm Elroy Jetson.

423
00:14:54,352 --> 00:14:56,646
Yeah, yeah, come back
when you have some money.

424
00:14:56,729 --> 00:14:58,022
Take him home, Bam Bam.

425
00:14:58,105 --> 00:14:59,148
Bam, bam, bam.

426
00:14:59,232 --> 00:15:00,816
I don't want to go home.

427
00:15:00,900 --> 00:15:02,693
Take me to Astro's grave.

428
00:15:04,612 --> 00:15:05,655
♪♪ You do ♪♪

429
00:15:05,738 --> 00:15:06,989
♪♪ And you do ♪♪

430
00:15:07,073 --> 00:15:09,242
♪♪ Thank goodness

431
00:15:09,325 --> 00:15:14,830
♪♪ I've got you! ♪♪

432
00:15:20,461 --> 00:15:21,504
Do you hear that?

433
00:15:21,587 --> 00:15:23,005
They love us.

434
00:15:23,089 --> 00:15:24,298
Yes, we're a hit!
You were amazing!

435
00:15:24,382 --> 00:15:25,383
Oh, so were you.

436
00:15:25,508 --> 00:15:26,843
Well, it was a good crowd.

437
00:15:26,926 --> 00:15:28,928
They didn't even notice
that you missed that F-sharp.

438
00:15:29,011 --> 00:15:31,305
Yes, well... beg pardon?

439
00:15:31,389 --> 00:15:32,431
The F-sharp, darling.

440
00:15:32,515 --> 00:15:33,683
You were just slightly off.

441
00:15:33,766 --> 00:15:34,976
I'm pretty sure I wasn't.

442
00:15:35,059 --> 00:15:36,644
Oh, well, maybe
it was me.

443
00:15:36,727 --> 00:15:37,770
Must have been you.

444
00:15:37,854 --> 00:15:38,980
I was being sarcastic.

445
00:15:39,063 --> 00:15:40,106
Well, it wasn't me.

446
00:15:40,189 --> 00:15:41,524
Well, it wasn't me.

447
00:15:41,607 --> 00:15:42,608
♪♪ Ah. ♪♪

448
00:15:42,733 --> 00:15:44,151
♪♪ Ah. ♪♪

449
00:15:44,235 --> 00:15:48,030
♪♪ Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. ♪♪
♪♪ Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah ♪♪

450
00:15:48,114 --> 00:15:49,490
♪♪ Like this, listen to me.♪

451
00:15:52,493 --> 00:15:53,536
Oh, hi, Meg.

452
00:15:56,122 --> 00:15:57,957
Peter, do you think maybe
it was unfair of us

453
00:15:58,040 --> 00:15:59,625
to tell Meg
she couldn't see that boy?

454
00:15:59,709 --> 00:16:01,752
Oh, completely. We
totally reamed her.

455
00:16:01,836 --> 00:16:03,379
Did you see that
look in her eyes?

456
00:16:03,462 --> 00:16:04,463
She hates you.

457
00:16:07,175 --> 00:16:11,387
♪♪ Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. ♪♪
♪♪ Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. ♪♪

458
00:16:11,470 --> 00:16:12,471
Well, there it is, kids.

459
00:16:12,555 --> 00:16:13,556
Your first marquee.

460
00:16:13,639 --> 00:16:14,640
Meet you inside.

461
00:16:18,060 --> 00:16:19,145
Pretty exciting.

462
00:16:19,228 --> 00:16:20,438
What? The marquee
or the other thing?

463
00:16:20,521 --> 00:16:21,564
What other thing?

464
00:16:21,647 --> 00:16:23,482
You know,
the sex with Simon.

465
00:16:23,566 --> 00:16:25,401
Why else would your
name be first?

466
00:16:25,484 --> 00:16:26,652
Well, it's obvious.

467
00:16:26,736 --> 00:16:28,237
You know, lead with strength

468
00:16:28,321 --> 00:16:30,615
put your best foot forward,
et cetera, et cetera.

469
00:16:30,698 --> 00:16:32,283
So, the sex was good?

470
00:16:32,366 --> 00:16:34,744
Oh, shut up,
you egotistical jerk!

471
00:16:34,827 --> 00:16:36,537
You shut up,
you sack-bellied strumpet!

472
00:16:36,621 --> 00:16:37,622
Blimp-headed jackass!

473
00:16:37,705 --> 00:16:39,081
Mealy-mouthed crotch pheasant!

474
00:16:39,165 --> 00:16:41,584
♪♪ Thank goodness

475
00:16:41,667 --> 00:16:46,839
♪♪ I've got you! ♪♪

476
00:16:49,717 --> 00:16:51,010
Jeff! What are
you doing here?

477
00:16:51,093 --> 00:16:52,678
Look, I'm not supposed
to see you.

478
00:16:52,762 --> 00:16:54,013
Your parents invited me.

479
00:16:54,096 --> 00:16:55,306
My parents?
But they wouldn't...

480
00:16:55,389 --> 00:16:56,807
Yes, we would.

481
00:16:56,891 --> 00:16:58,226
Oh, my God! What
are you doing?

482
00:16:58,309 --> 00:16:59,727
We were wrong, Meg.

483
00:16:59,810 --> 00:17:01,729
If you like Jeff, we
should give him a chance.

484
00:17:01,812 --> 00:17:04,190
Yeah, and we wanted him
to feel welcome in our home.

485
00:17:04,273 --> 00:17:07,193
Mom, I need new batteries
for my walkman.

486
00:17:07,360 --> 00:17:09,820
Hey, why is everybody
else naked?

487
00:17:11,280 --> 00:17:12,698
Yahtzee! I win!

488
00:17:12,782 --> 00:17:14,992
Yeah, in your face!
In your face!

489
00:17:15,076 --> 00:17:16,202
In your face!

490
00:17:16,285 --> 00:17:17,870
( screams )

491
00:17:17,954 --> 00:17:19,038
Uh, I got to get going.

492
00:17:19,121 --> 00:17:20,373
Thanks, Mr.
and Mrs. Griffin.

493
00:17:20,456 --> 00:17:21,457
Our pleasure, Jeff.

494
00:17:21,541 --> 00:17:22,583
Nice hanging with you, Jeff.

495
00:17:22,750 --> 00:17:23,918
I'm sorry about my parents.

496
00:17:24,001 --> 00:17:25,294
I hope they didn't
embarrass you.

497
00:17:25,378 --> 00:17:27,171
Are you kidding? I
think they're great.

498
00:17:27,547 --> 00:17:29,423
It took a lot of guts
for them to do what they did.

499
00:17:29,507 --> 00:17:30,508
I'll see you later.

500
00:17:33,261 --> 00:17:34,262
Thanks, you guys.

501
00:17:34,345 --> 00:17:35,346
That was really cool.

502
00:17:35,429 --> 00:17:37,807
Hey, Peter,
can I borrow your lawnmow...

503
00:17:37,890 --> 00:17:39,308
Ah... You folks
got a towel?

504
00:17:39,392 --> 00:17:40,601
Simon, would
you be a dear

505
00:17:40,685 --> 00:17:43,104
and ask Stewie to dance
on his own feet tonight?

506
00:17:43,187 --> 00:17:45,731
Pardon me, Simon, could you
provide Olivia with a bucket

507
00:17:45,815 --> 00:17:47,024
so she can carry a tune?

508
00:17:47,108 --> 00:17:49,068
People, people,
stop this craziness.

509
00:17:49,151 --> 00:17:50,945
The critic from the
Providence Journal is here.

510
00:17:51,028 --> 00:17:53,865
If he gives us a good
review, the doors are going to fly open.

511
00:17:53,948 --> 00:17:55,867
Now, go get them,
my little silly-billies.

512
00:17:55,950 --> 00:17:57,410
All right, let's just
get through this.

513
00:17:57,493 --> 00:17:58,494
Fine with me.

514
00:17:58,578 --> 00:18:00,788
Wait a minute.
You're wearing ruby lipstick.

515
00:18:00,872 --> 00:18:03,332
You're painted up like some
attention-grabbing Jezebel.

516
00:18:03,416 --> 00:18:05,001
Well, you're one to talk.

517
00:18:05,084 --> 00:18:07,086
You've been stuffing your diaper
since day one.

518
00:18:07,170 --> 00:18:09,213
It's where I keep
my peppermint Mentos.

519
00:18:09,297 --> 00:18:11,591
Just because your breath
reeks of rotten Lunchables

520
00:18:11,674 --> 00:18:12,925
doesn't mean mine has to.

521
00:18:29,192 --> 00:18:30,902
Break it up. Break it up!

522
00:18:30,985 --> 00:18:33,696
I don't need this act,
and I don't need you.

523
00:18:33,779 --> 00:18:35,531
You've done nothing
but hold me back.

524
00:18:35,615 --> 00:18:36,741
I quit!

525
00:18:36,824 --> 00:18:39,285
The only thing I've held you
back from is failure.

526
00:18:39,368 --> 00:18:41,913
Come on, Simon, we don't need
that little Bebe No-worth.

527
00:18:41,996 --> 00:18:43,581
I don't know, Stewie.

528
00:18:43,664 --> 00:18:45,917
Without Olivia, this act
is like Fire Island after Labor Day.

529
00:18:46,000 --> 00:18:47,168
Over.

530
00:18:47,251 --> 00:18:48,377
Fine, I don't need you.

531
00:18:48,461 --> 00:18:49,879
I can manage my own career.

532
00:18:49,962 --> 00:18:52,632
Yes... yes,
I'm-I'm quite capable of that.

533
00:18:58,846 --> 00:19:01,933
♪♪ I got my top hat and cane ♪♪

534
00:19:02,016 --> 00:19:04,936
♪♪ And a pocketful
of miracles ♪♪

535
00:19:05,144 --> 00:19:06,979
♪♪ Pocketful of miracles ♪♪

536
00:19:07,063 --> 00:19:08,105
♪♪ Pocketful... ♪♪

537
00:19:08,189 --> 00:19:09,565
( audience booing )

538
00:19:09,649 --> 00:19:11,108
Would somebody
get a hook?

539
00:19:11,192 --> 00:19:12,318
This is worse than Seussical!

540
00:19:12,401 --> 00:19:13,528
No, no, wait, wait.

541
00:19:13,611 --> 00:19:14,820
I was about to do this thing.

542
00:19:22,787 --> 00:19:24,872
Oh, hello.
Didn't notice you there.

543
00:19:24,956 --> 00:19:27,041
You know, it's not easy
living with my family--

544
00:19:27,124 --> 00:19:28,709
a bunch of characters they are.

545
00:19:28,793 --> 00:19:30,378
Like my father...

546
00:19:30,461 --> 00:19:34,006
"Holy crap, Lois, check out
the freakin' log in the toilet."

547
00:19:34,090 --> 00:19:36,092
Get off the stage!

548
00:19:38,886 --> 00:19:40,513
Oh, w-what do you
say, Bernie?

549
00:19:40,596 --> 00:19:42,098
Two nights at the old rate?

550
00:19:42,181 --> 00:19:45,226
Like I told you before, kid,
I can't book you without Olivia.

551
00:19:45,309 --> 00:19:47,228
But that's the good news.
We're back together.

552
00:19:47,311 --> 00:19:48,312
She's right here.

553
00:19:48,896 --> 00:19:51,357
Hi, Bernie, glad to be back.

554
00:19:51,440 --> 00:19:54,318
Ask Stewie
about his sexy parties.

555
00:19:55,361 --> 00:19:57,029
"Ask Stewie about
his sexy parties."

556
00:19:57,113 --> 00:19:58,239
What were you thinking?

557
00:19:58,322 --> 00:19:59,323
I was just trying...

558
00:19:59,407 --> 00:20:00,616
I'm not speaking to you.

559
00:20:00,700 --> 00:20:01,701
-But, Stewie.
-Shut up!

560
00:20:04,078 --> 00:20:06,372
I guess, I guess the best advice
I got was from

561
00:20:06,455 --> 00:20:07,957
Marty Scorsese.

562
00:20:08,040 --> 00:20:09,917
Um, I was having a problem

563
00:20:10,001 --> 00:20:11,752
understanding why
I'd be taking abuse

564
00:20:11,836 --> 00:20:15,298
from this lower-ranking officer
played by Chris O'Donnell

565
00:20:15,381 --> 00:20:16,966
and-and he told me

566
00:20:17,049 --> 00:20:19,927
"You don't have to understand
it, your character does."

567
00:20:20,261 --> 00:20:21,929
Oh, that always stuck with me.

568
00:20:22,013 --> 00:20:23,014
Stewie?

569
00:20:23,097 --> 00:20:24,599
Olivia, what are
you doing here?

570
00:20:24,682 --> 00:20:26,392
Oh, I must be an
absolute mess.

571
00:20:26,475 --> 00:20:28,227
The studio made me
fire my makeup girl.

572
00:20:28,311 --> 00:20:29,854
Oh, I, um...

573
00:20:29,937 --> 00:20:32,732
I just wanted to stop by
and see how you were doing.

574
00:20:32,815 --> 00:20:34,525
I had heard some things.

575
00:20:34,609 --> 00:20:36,110
Oh, that it's going
great for me?

576
00:20:36,194 --> 00:20:37,236
Well, you heard right.

577
00:20:37,445 --> 00:20:38,779
Oh, glad to hear that.

578
00:20:38,863 --> 00:20:39,947
But, hey, um..

579
00:20:40,448 --> 00:20:42,325
you know,
if you're not busy, um...

580
00:20:42,408 --> 00:20:44,577
what say you and I get
the old team back together?

581
00:20:44,660 --> 00:20:46,370
Well, actually, I can't.

582
00:20:46,454 --> 00:20:48,289
I'm on my way to Hollywood.

583
00:20:48,372 --> 00:20:50,416
I got this part
in a movie, and...

584
00:20:50,499 --> 00:20:52,335
Oh, oh, oh, what
am I thinking?

585
00:20:52,418 --> 00:20:53,711
I-I, you know,
I'd love to

586
00:20:53,794 --> 00:20:55,755
but I-I-I just...
I'm booked solid.

587
00:20:55,880 --> 00:20:58,216
I'm doing a three-
episode guest shot

588
00:20:58,299 --> 00:20:59,800
on The Gilmore Girls.

589
00:20:59,884 --> 00:21:02,845
I play Rory's motorcycle
driving boyfriend.

590
00:21:02,929 --> 00:21:04,805
He's a bad boy at
heart, you know.

591
00:21:04,889 --> 00:21:07,016
But there's-there's some
good in there, Olivia

592
00:21:07,099 --> 00:21:08,684
and it comes
through absolutely.

593
00:21:08,768 --> 00:21:11,145
That's really good to hear,
Stewie.

594
00:21:11,437 --> 00:21:13,314
Please, take care of yourself.

595
00:21:16,484 --> 00:21:18,110
See you on the coast.

596
00:21:19,487 --> 00:21:20,613
So, did you
let him have it?

597
00:21:20,696 --> 00:21:23,157
No, he let himself have it.

598
00:21:26,661 --> 00:21:27,828
This is it.

599
00:21:30,831 --> 00:21:32,959
Hey, uh, how you doing, kid?

600
00:21:33,042 --> 00:21:34,627
Are you from wardrobe?

601
00:21:34,710 --> 00:21:35,711
No, no, it's me, Brian.

602
00:21:36,128 --> 00:21:37,213
I brought what you wanted

603
00:21:37,296 --> 00:21:38,631
but they wouldn't
let me leave it.

604
00:21:38,714 --> 00:21:39,715
So, uh...

605
00:21:39,799 --> 00:21:41,801
Hit it once, please?
Just once?

606
00:21:42,927 --> 00:21:44,887
( high-pitched tone )
♪♪ Ah... ♪♪

607
00:21:44,971 --> 00:21:46,222
Oh, my God, I was flat.

608
00:21:46,305 --> 00:21:47,306
All right, then,
help me up.

609
00:21:47,390 --> 00:21:48,391
Let's go home.