1
00:00:07,380 --> 00:00:09,460
[Snoring]
2
00:00:09,540 --> 00:00:11,380
- [Clattering]
- [Mutters]
3
00:00:11,460 --> 00:00:13,340
It's the A-bomb!
Duck and cover!
4
00:00:14,700 --> 00:00:16,700
I bet Eric's trying to sneak out.
5
00:00:16,780 --> 00:00:19,700
Red, Red. Wait. Wait.
What if it's a burglar?
6
00:00:19,780 --> 00:00:21,780
What's a burglar
gonna steal from us?
7
00:00:23,300 --> 00:00:25,500
My Shirley Temple figurines.
8
00:00:27,220 --> 00:00:30,460
Oh, I knew I shouldn't have told
Liz Anderson about them.
9
00:00:30,500 --> 00:00:33,220
- Her nephew's been in jail, you know.
- [Schotzie Whimpers]
10
00:00:33,300 --> 00:00:35,180
Oh! Look at this.
11
00:00:35,260 --> 00:00:38,020
Some guard dog. You know,
we could be trampled by Mongolians.
12
00:00:38,060 --> 00:00:41,020
This thing wouldn't
even wag its tail.
13
00:00:45,060 --> 00:00:47,540
Hey. I-I-I heard a scary noise.
14
00:00:48,540 --> 00:00:50,940
Good God. Are you nude?
15
00:00:52,260 --> 00:00:54,140
No.
16
00:00:54,180 --> 00:00:57,460
- I'm wearing my toga.
- [Clatter/ng]
17
00:00:57,540 --> 00:01:00,900
- [Gasps] There it is again.
- That's it. I'm gettin' my bat.
18
00:01:00,980 --> 00:01:04,260
All right. Calm down. It's probably
just Steven trying to sneak out.
19
00:01:04,340 --> 00:01:08,900
What if it's not Steven?
What if the burglar has Steven?
20
00:01:08,980 --> 00:01:11,940
Well, then we'll try to talk him
into taking Eric too.
21
00:01:14,180 --> 00:01:17,020
- Okay. Let's do this.
- Look at him.
22
00:01:18,180 --> 00:01:20,380
Bare-assed and holding
a plastic bat.
23
00:01:21,660 --> 00:01:23,860
That's your son, Kitty.
24
00:01:29,220 --> 00:01:31,940
What kind of burglar
robs people on a weeknight?
25
00:01:32,020 --> 00:01:34,980
Doesn't he have a job
to go to in the morning?
26
00:01:40,260 --> 00:01:42,660
- [Kitty] Jackie?
- [Red] What the hell?
27
00:01:42,740 --> 00:01:45,900
- Oh, my God!
- Oh, my God!
28
00:01:46,940 --> 00:01:48,860
Forman, are you naked?
29
00:01:54,100 --> 00:01:56,020
(Rock Group Singing)
30
00:02:17,020 --> 00:02:18,780
(Ends)
31
00:02:18,860 --> 00:02:21,700
Hello, Wisconsin!
32
00:02:26,740 --> 00:02:29,620
Who the hell do you think you are...
33
00:02:29,660 --> 00:02:32,500
bringing a girl into my house
in the middle of the night?
34
00:02:32,540 --> 00:02:36,340
And right in our basement. We keep
our Christmas decorations down there.
35
00:02:37,820 --> 00:02:41,580
BabyJesus was watching.
36
00:02:44,700 --> 00:02:47,020
- I told you to look where you were going.
- What idiot...
37
00:02:47,100 --> 00:02:49,500
leaves a LEGO set
right in front of the door?
38
00:02:49,580 --> 00:02:54,100
You knocked over
my space command center?
39
00:02:54,180 --> 00:02:56,380
I spent three hours building that.
40
00:02:56,460 --> 00:02:59,700
All right. Now what
is going on in my basement?
41
00:02:59,740 --> 00:03:02,500
Jackie's been sleeping here
the last couple of weeks.
42
00:03:02,580 --> 00:03:07,220
Couple of weeks? This is not
the Playboy Mansion, you know.
43
00:03:07,260 --> 00:03:11,820
- Look, nothing was going on.
- Nothing was going on?
44
00:03:11,900 --> 00:03:15,300
Um, space command centers
were ruined!
45
00:03:15,380 --> 00:03:19,300
Would you please
go put some pants on?
46
00:03:19,380 --> 00:03:21,820
This is where I eat.
47
00:03:25,780 --> 00:03:28,220
Jackie's only been staying here
'cause her dad's in jail...
48
00:03:28,300 --> 00:03:31,500
- and her mom's still not back yet.
- Steven! That's private.
49
00:03:31,580 --> 00:03:34,060
Your mom's not back yet?
You told me she came home.
50
00:03:34,140 --> 00:03:38,220
Could we not talk about this?
I'm fine. Okay? Everything is fine.
51
00:03:38,300 --> 00:03:41,140
- If you need a place-
- No, no, no. I don't need anything.
52
00:03:41,220 --> 00:03:43,580
I'm only here 'cause...
53
00:03:43,620 --> 00:03:46,540
I am such a tramp.
54
00:03:46,620 --> 00:03:50,780
So, I should just go home
and try to control my dirty urges.
55
00:03:50,820 --> 00:03:54,580
Jackie, you're not going home.
There's nobody there.
56
00:03:54,620 --> 00:03:58,420
All right. Look, Jackie.
Tonight you can sleep in Laurie's room...
57
00:03:58,500 --> 00:04:03,060
and then tomorrow, we'll
track down your floozy mother.
58
00:04:03,140 --> 00:04:06,460
Honey, do you have any idea
where she might be?
59
00:04:06,500 --> 00:04:12,140
Well, the last postcard I got had a picture
of some guy with a bone through his nose.
60
00:04:12,220 --> 00:04:14,660
What is that, like, Tennessee?
61
00:04:17,740 --> 00:04:20,220
Hey, Donna.
This just in:
62
00:04:20,300 --> 00:04:23,660
Your weirdo boyfriend
sleeps in the nude.
63
00:04:23,740 --> 00:04:25,860
Yeah? So? I do too.
64
00:04:25,940 --> 00:04:28,500
Oh, yeah!
65
00:04:31,980 --> 00:04:34,580
Oh, I can see it now.
66
00:04:34,660 --> 00:04:37,060
And it is glorious.
67
00:04:39,300 --> 00:04:41,180
Excuse me.
68
00:04:43,340 --> 00:04:45,460
Jackie, I can't believe
your parents are gone.
69
00:04:45,540 --> 00:04:50,700
- I'm so sorry.
- Okay, everybody needs to stop worrying about me.
70
00:04:50,780 --> 00:04:53,500
I'm fine.
I mean, how could I not be?
71
00:04:53,580 --> 00:04:58,900
Mrs. Forman did my hair
and made me smiley-faced pancakes.
72
00:04:58,940 --> 00:05:03,780
Eric, this house is like a shabby hotel
with really great service.
73
00:05:03,860 --> 00:05:07,700
Oh, hey, while you're visiting,
here's my LEGO set and a picture...
74
00:05:07,780 --> 00:05:11,020
of the space command center.
75
00:05:11,100 --> 00:05:13,540
Okay? Get building.
76
00:05:13,620 --> 00:05:16,660
I swear to God, if my three-man escape pod
doesn't fit the star bay...
77
00:05:16,740 --> 00:05:18,820
heads are gonna roll.
78
00:05:19,780 --> 00:05:22,620
I have a question.
79
00:05:22,660 --> 00:05:24,980
If Hyde was in Hyde's bed...
80
00:05:25,020 --> 00:05:27,540
and Jackie was in Hyde's bed...
81
00:05:27,580 --> 00:05:30,660
what exactly was going on
in said bed?
82
00:05:30,740 --> 00:05:33,260
Nothing. She needed
a place to sleep.
83
00:05:33,340 --> 00:05:36,020
"Needed a place to sleep."
84
00:05:36,100 --> 00:05:40,180
Well, a bed is an interesting choice,
now, wouldn't you say?
85
00:05:40,220 --> 00:05:44,180
Oh, shut up, Michael.
It's not like we were doing it.
86
00:05:44,260 --> 00:05:47,380
Oh, come on, Jackie.
87
00:05:47,420 --> 00:05:51,420
You can't sleep in the same bed
with someone and not be doing it.
88
00:05:51,500 --> 00:05:56,260
I've fallen asleep not doin' it
and woken up doin' it.
89
00:05:56,340 --> 00:05:59,300
And that's why they won't
put him to sleep at the dentist.
90
00:06:05,780 --> 00:06:08,060
Guys, I don't know what's
going on with Nina.
91
00:06:08,140 --> 00:06:11,340
I keep asking to meet her parents,
but she keeps making excuses.
92
00:06:11,420 --> 00:06:15,100
It's probably the same reason
I won't let you meet my parents.
93
00:06:15,140 --> 00:06:18,740
She's afraid you're gonna say
something weird and embarrass her.
94
00:06:18,780 --> 00:06:23,900
Oh, please. I'm a hot-looking,
smooth-talking, frisky-assed son-of-a-bitch.
95
00:06:28,380 --> 00:06:30,620
Hey, Fez. Right there.
96
00:06:30,700 --> 00:06:34,540
That's, like-
That's, like, a really weird thing to say.
97
00:06:36,140 --> 00:06:39,020
Yeah, I mean, we're used to you,
but, dude, you're weird.
98
00:06:40,900 --> 00:06:43,380
For Nina to let you
meet her parents-
99
00:06:43,460 --> 00:06:46,260
I think what Kelso's
trying to say is that...
100
00:06:46,300 --> 00:06:48,740
maybe you don't make
the best first impression.
101
00:06:48,820 --> 00:06:50,740
Like, remember the first
time you met my parents?
102
00:06:50,780 --> 00:06:54,860
- Mom, Dad, this is Fez.
- Well, hello there.
103
00:07:01,660 --> 00:07:03,980
He did what?
104
00:07:05,780 --> 00:07:09,540
Yeah, and then it actually got
even more disturbing.
105
00:07:10,820 --> 00:07:14,020
Get this creepy bastard off me!
106
00:07:17,780 --> 00:07:20,820
I never heard that story.
107
00:07:20,860 --> 00:07:23,260
So how was Forman's mom?
108
00:07:26,860 --> 00:07:29,620
Well, at first she was giving me nothing,
but by the end...
109
00:07:29,660 --> 00:07:32,180
she was giving me something.
110
00:07:34,660 --> 00:07:37,940
Yeah! She's spunky!
111
00:07:37,980 --> 00:07:40,220
- Man, I'd kiss your mom.
- Oh, my God.
112
00:07:40,300 --> 00:07:43,380
How could Jackie's mother
abandon her only child?
113
00:07:43,420 --> 00:07:45,340
I have half a mind
to take this public.
114
00:07:45,420 --> 00:07:48,460
[Gasps]
We could go on Donahue.
115
00:07:48,540 --> 00:07:51,260
No. Go on Carson. He's funnier.
116
00:07:52,620 --> 00:07:54,900
One time, the animal guy was on...
117
00:07:54,940 --> 00:07:57,260
his parrot dooked
right on Johnny's head.
118
00:07:58,700 --> 00:08:00,740
Dad, I think you're
missing the point.
119
00:08:00,820 --> 00:08:02,860
We need to find Jackie
someplace to stay, you know...
120
00:08:02,940 --> 00:08:04,820
where she won't be all alone.
121
00:08:04,900 --> 00:08:07,100
I can get her a room
at the hotel I work at.
122
00:08:07,180 --> 00:08:10,460
No, Jackie is not staying in a hotel.
We have an empty room right here.
123
00:08:10,540 --> 00:08:15,580
Kitty, every time we have an empty room,
you wanna fill it up with a stray child.
124
00:08:16,860 --> 00:08:19,980
You're like the old lady
who lived in a shoe.
125
00:08:23,260 --> 00:08:25,140
Did you just call me "old"?
126
00:08:26,460 --> 00:08:28,460
Okay. Okay.
Here's what I th/nk.
127
00:08:28,540 --> 00:08:32,420
Oh, hey, everybody!
Mr. Nude has an opinion.
128
00:08:35,460 --> 00:08:39,740
I'm sure we're all interested
in what Mr. Nude has to say.
129
00:08:41,100 --> 00:08:42,940
Floor's all yours...
130
00:08:43,020 --> 00:08:44,860
Mr. Nude.
131
00:08:44,940 --> 00:08:48,540
- Never mind.
- I guess he was just thinkin'...
132
00:08:48,620 --> 00:08:50,660
about bein' nude.
133
00:08:50,740 --> 00:08:52,660
What is wrong with you people?
134
00:08:52,700 --> 00:08:56,180
There is nothing funny about a teenaged girl
whose mother abandoned her.
135
00:08:56,220 --> 00:08:59,140
You know, we're aIIJackie's got.
We can't just turn our backs on her.
136
00:09:00,780 --> 00:09:04,780
Donna, you're right.
You teIIJackie she can stay with us.
137
00:09:04,860 --> 00:09:07,540
What? No. No, she can't
stay with us.
138
00:09:07,580 --> 00:09:11,060
- Sure. She can stay in your room with you.
- But-
139
00:09:14,260 --> 00:09:16,740
Oh, you're all gonna pay for this!
140
00:09:23,580 --> 00:09:27,020
I can't believe my dad's making me ask
Jackie to move in with us.
141
00:09:27,100 --> 00:09:29,180
This is gonna be a nightmare.
142
00:09:29,260 --> 00:09:31,620
"Donna, where's your spirit?"
143
00:09:31,700 --> 00:09:33,860
"Donna, you're still hungry?"
144
00:09:33,940 --> 00:09:37,100
"Donna, your lumberjack head
is blocking out the sun." [Whining Scoff]
145
00:09:38,300 --> 00:09:41,940
You know, I'm not too big.
She is too small.
146
00:09:41,980 --> 00:09:44,540
Okay, just for the record...
147
00:09:44,620 --> 00:09:47,860
I don't sleep nude
for any disgusting reason.
148
00:09:47,940 --> 00:09:50,020
I'm just a hot sleeper.
149
00:09:51,820 --> 00:09:53,940
Okay, I'm not a hot sleeper.
150
00:09:53,980 --> 00:09:57,060
I'm 17 years old.
I sleep right next door to the girl I love.
151
00:09:57,140 --> 00:09:59,140
Things occur to me. Okay?
152
00:09:59,220 --> 00:10:02,900
If I'm already nude, you know-
It just saves time.
153
00:10:02,940 --> 00:10:06,300
Guys, Nina agreed
to let me meet her parents.
154
00:10:06,380 --> 00:10:08,220
And to seem completely normal...
155
00:10:08,300 --> 00:10:10,860
I've come up with the perfect opening line
for Nina's mother.
156
00:10:10,940 --> 00:10:13,260
[Clears Throat]
"Hello, Mrs. Bartel.
157
00:10:13,340 --> 00:10:15,900
I can see where Nina
gets her lovely ass."
158
00:10:17,860 --> 00:10:20,940
You're so weird, man.
159
00:10:21,020 --> 00:10:23,220
You know what?
There's a way around that.
160
00:10:23,300 --> 00:10:25,420
I'm gonna make you so beautiful...
161
00:10:25,500 --> 00:10:28,300
that Nina's parents don't notice
how freakin' weird you are.
162
00:10:28,380 --> 00:10:31,340
Bein' beautiful-That's how
I get away with stuff.
163
00:10:31,420 --> 00:10:33,300
Except my problem is
I gotta tone it down...
164
00:10:33,380 --> 00:10:35,340
'cause otherwise the chick's
mom gets interested.
165
00:10:35,420 --> 00:10:37,820
Then we got a big problem.
166
00:10:39,100 --> 00:10:41,180
Let's make you man-pretty.
167
00:11:25,460 --> 00:11:27,540
[No Audible Dialogue]
168
00:11:51,620 --> 00:11:54,100
Okay. I've been thinking
about what to do with Jackie.
169
00:11:54,180 --> 00:11:57,660
I think we're overlooking
the mobile home option.
170
00:11:57,740 --> 00:12:00,460
Okay? You could park her
right in the driveway...
171
00:12:00,540 --> 00:12:04,340
and we'll all know she's safe
in her own little, steel box.
172
00:12:04,420 --> 00:12:06,860
Donna, you have to let her
stay with you.
173
00:12:06,940 --> 00:12:08,820
Come on.
She's your best friend.
174
00:12:08,900 --> 00:12:10,900
She's not my best friend.
175
00:12:10,980 --> 00:12:13,020
Well, then, who's your best friend?
176
00:12:16,060 --> 00:12:19,220
Oh, crap! How the hell
did that happen?
177
00:12:19,300 --> 00:12:23,380
Oh, look. Mr. Nude is helping.
178
00:12:23,420 --> 00:12:25,420
Mr. Nude, huh?
179
00:12:25,500 --> 00:12:27,780
That was my nickname in college.
180
00:12:27,860 --> 00:12:30,220
Dad, you didn't go to college.
181
00:12:30,300 --> 00:12:33,260
Didn't stop me
from gettin' a nickname.
182
00:12:33,340 --> 00:12:37,740
You all gonna be here for this?
I don't thinkJackie's gonna be cool with that.
183
00:12:37,820 --> 00:12:40,140
Well, Steven,
everybody needs support.
184
00:12:40,220 --> 00:12:44,460
Like this one time,
I left the supermarket in a really bad mood...
185
00:12:44,540 --> 00:12:48,300
and then I met these very nice people,
the Hare Krishnas.
186
00:12:49,420 --> 00:12:51,460
They sang me a song.
They gave me some rice.
187
00:12:51,540 --> 00:12:53,540
It was just the little pickup
I needed.
188
00:12:53,620 --> 00:12:57,020
You know, if I hadn't had to make dinner,
I might've gotten into their van.
189
00:12:57,100 --> 00:12:59,500
[Laughing]
190
00:13:01,780 --> 00:13:04,620
Yeah, those freaks
were hasslin' me once too.
191
00:13:04,700 --> 00:13:08,780
So when they weren't lookin',
I stole five boxes ofThin Mints.
192
00:13:10,500 --> 00:13:12,660
Kelso, those were Girl Scouts.
193
00:13:17,620 --> 00:13:20,700
Whatever, man.
They were pushy.
194
00:13:20,780 --> 00:13:22,780
Here comes Jackie.
195
00:13:22,860 --> 00:13:24,700
Well, I think this is a big mistake.
196
00:13:24,780 --> 00:13:27,380
When this blows up in your face,
don't come lookin' for me.
197
00:13:27,460 --> 00:13:30,780
I'll be bustin' up Forman's
space station again.
198
00:13:34,140 --> 00:13:38,140
Jackie! Jackie, Donna has something
she wants to ask you.
199
00:13:38,220 --> 00:13:40,140
- Donna.
- [Clears Throat]
200
00:13:40,220 --> 00:13:42,740
So, Jackie, we were all thinking...
201
00:13:42,780 --> 00:13:44,660
that you might come
stay with me for awhile...
202
00:13:44,700 --> 00:13:47,060
since you're having
such a hard time right now.
203
00:13:47,100 --> 00:13:49,780
God! I'm so sick of this!
204
00:13:49,860 --> 00:13:51,700
I don't have hard times!
205
00:13:51,780 --> 00:13:54,700
I'm Jackie Burkhart.
I got voted head cheerleader...
206
00:13:54,780 --> 00:13:58,540
by the largest margin
in cheerleader history.
207
00:13:58,620 --> 00:14:01,020
I have a wonderful life.
208
00:14:01,100 --> 00:14:03,940
- Yeah, but, Jackie, your dad's in prison,
and your mom-
- I'm sorry, Donna...
209
00:14:04,020 --> 00:14:06,940
but you're just not popular
enough for me to live with.
210
00:14:08,060 --> 00:14:10,980
[Scoffs]
I'm not popular enough?
211
00:14:11,060 --> 00:14:13,380
I was doing you a favor,
'cause I felt bad for you.
212
00:14:13,460 --> 00:14:16,300
Well, don't. Okay? I don't need to be
your good deed for the day.
213
00:14:16,380 --> 00:14:21,660
Fine. There's the door. Don't let it hit
your popular, little butt on the way out.
214
00:14:22,620 --> 00:14:24,660
F-Fine.
215
00:14:27,340 --> 00:14:30,900
Well, that was pretty hot.
216
00:14:36,140 --> 00:14:39,580
And that is how you make a canoe
out of banana skins.
217
00:14:39,660 --> 00:14:41,580
Oh!
218
00:14:42,860 --> 00:14:45,300
They love me. See?
There's nothing to worry about.
219
00:14:45,380 --> 00:14:49,180
- Great. Then we should get going.
- Oh! Oh! Don't go.
220
00:14:49,260 --> 00:14:52,780
Oh, it's such a pleasure having
someone so exotic in our home.
221
00:14:54,220 --> 00:14:56,820
We're so happy that Nina
has made a friend of you, Fez.
222
00:14:56,860 --> 00:15:02,100
Well, maybe it's because I'm so handsome
and not at all creepy.
223
00:15:02,180 --> 00:15:04,700
And, by the way, I see where
Nina gets her lovely ass.
224
00:15:04,780 --> 00:15:06,700
[All Laughing]
225
00:15:09,860 --> 00:15:11,780
Hey, I was talking to you,
Mr. Bartel.
226
00:15:13,180 --> 00:15:15,540
Oh, my!
227
00:15:16,860 --> 00:15:18,940
Honey, you are really broadening
your horizons.
228
00:15:19,020 --> 00:15:22,140
Having a friend like this is gonna look great
on your college application.
229
00:15:22,220 --> 00:15:24,500
Yes. We always enjoy
meeting Nina's friends.
230
00:15:24,580 --> 00:15:27,500
You keep calling me her "friend."
Don't you mean, her "boyfriend"?
231
00:15:27,580 --> 00:15:30,940
[Stammering]
Boyfriend?
232
00:15:32,700 --> 00:15:35,540
[Laughing]
233
00:15:35,580 --> 00:15:39,340
- What's so funny?
- You can't be her boyfriend.
234
00:15:39,420 --> 00:15:42,100
- Why not?
- Because you're-What's the word, honey?
235
00:15:42,140 --> 00:15:45,140
- "Different"?
- Okay. Different.
236
00:15:47,500 --> 00:15:49,580
Oh, I see.
237
00:15:49,660 --> 00:15:51,980
- You mean, "not white."
- Fez, no.
238
00:15:52,060 --> 00:15:53,900
I think I'll be leaving now.
Good day.
239
00:15:53,980 --> 00:15:56,500
- Fez, wait.
- I said, "Good day."
240
00:15:58,780 --> 00:16:00,940
By the way, I hope you do not
have a good day.
241
00:16:04,380 --> 00:16:07,580
And then when I asked her to live with me,
she said I'm not freakin' popular.
242
00:16:07,660 --> 00:16:10,740
Am I not on the radio
all the time as "Hot Donna"?
243
00:16:10,780 --> 00:16:15,780
Okay? There are "Hot Donna" posters
all over town, objectifying me.
244
00:16:15,860 --> 00:16:18,500
Is Jackie being objectified?
No!
245
00:16:20,260 --> 00:16:23,780
She only said that 'cause you embarrassed
her in a roomful of people.
246
00:16:23,860 --> 00:16:27,460
It was like a damn telethon in there.
The only thing missing was Jerry Lewis.
247
00:16:27,540 --> 00:16:30,580
So, what, it's my fault,
'cause I didn't ask her right?
248
00:16:31,900 --> 00:16:34,900
Okay. How about when your mom left?
249
00:16:34,980 --> 00:16:37,700
Think how you would've felt
if you walked into a roomful of people...
250
00:16:37,780 --> 00:16:41,300
everyone's talking about how sad
your life is and how much they pity you.
251
00:16:41,380 --> 00:16:43,660
- Yeah. I guess I get that.
- I'm just sayin' that...
252
00:16:43,740 --> 00:16:46,260
Jackie needs a place to stay,
and it'd be really cool...
253
00:16:46,300 --> 00:16:49,460
if you can ask her in a way
that doesn't make her feel bad.
254
00:16:49,500 --> 00:16:52,180
[Groans]
Fine.
255
00:16:52,260 --> 00:16:54,620
But she didn't have to
call me "unpopular." Okay?
256
00:16:54,700 --> 00:16:59,460
Unpopular girls don't get free Slurpees
from Tommy at the 7-Eleven.
257
00:16:59,540 --> 00:17:05,260
Donna, two years ago, Tommy tried to jump
a school bus on his moped.
258
00:17:05,340 --> 00:17:09,220
He didn't make it,
and now he gives everyone free Slurpees.
259
00:17:13,300 --> 00:17:17,540
So you see, Jackie, the reason I asked you
to stay with me before...
260
00:17:17,620 --> 00:17:20,620
is because, well, you were right.
261
00:17:20,700 --> 00:17:24,180
I am unpopular.
262
00:17:24,220 --> 00:17:26,180
Go on.
263
00:17:28,220 --> 00:17:31,900
I'm, um, too tall...
264
00:17:31,980 --> 00:17:35,100
and-and red hair is gross.
265
00:17:36,540 --> 00:17:39,300
And, well, if I don't
do something soon...
266
00:17:39,380 --> 00:17:42,420
my unpopularity is gonna
follow me to college-
267
00:17:42,460 --> 00:17:44,380
unless you help.
268
00:17:45,340 --> 00:17:47,580
Please come stay with me.
269
00:17:50,700 --> 00:17:52,940
Jackie-
270
00:17:53,020 --> 00:17:55,540
[Haltingly]
Help me be more like you.
271
00:17:59,940 --> 00:18:04,660
Well, as long as everybody knows
I'm doing it for you...
272
00:18:04,700 --> 00:18:07,980
- I'll do it.
- Great.
273
00:18:09,340 --> 00:18:12,340
Hey, Donna. Thank you.
274
00:18:12,380 --> 00:18:16,580
- You're welcome.
- Okay. First things first.
275
00:18:16,660 --> 00:18:20,660
If you wanna be more popular,
you're gonna have to break up with Eric.
276
00:18:20,700 --> 00:18:22,780
What?
277
00:18:28,900 --> 00:18:32,220
You know, I have been called many
names since coming to this country...
278
00:18:32,300 --> 00:18:34,380
but I have never been
treated like that before.
279
00:18:34,460 --> 00:18:37,020
Look, Fez...
280
00:18:37,100 --> 00:18:39,980
unfortunately, there are
some people in this world...
281
00:18:40,060 --> 00:18:42,660
that are gonna judge you
on the color of your skin...
282
00:18:42,740 --> 00:18:44,780
or your funny accent...
283
00:18:44,860 --> 00:18:47,260
or that girlie little way you run.
284
00:18:50,780 --> 00:18:53,540
But you know what?
You're not alone.
285
00:18:53,620 --> 00:18:56,620
Why do you think
the Martians won't land here?
286
00:18:56,700 --> 00:19:00,660
'Cause they're green, and they know people
are gonna make fun of'em.
287
00:19:00,740 --> 00:19:03,620
You said it, brother.
288
00:19:03,700 --> 00:19:07,460
I just wish there were someplace
in the world where prejudice didn't exist.
289
00:19:07,540 --> 00:19:10,100
Huh.
Well, that's Canada.
290
00:19:14,260 --> 00:19:16,820
Yup.
Good old Canada.
291
00:19:16,860 --> 00:19:18,740
They don't make
generalizations about people...
292
00:19:18,820 --> 00:19:21,100
'cause they're too busy
playing hockey or gettin' drunk...
293
00:19:21,180 --> 00:19:24,340
or putting maple syrup on their ham.
294
00:19:24,380 --> 00:19:29,060
- Fez, we need to talk.
- Hey! He might not be from this country...
295
00:19:29,140 --> 00:19:31,100
but he's beautiful, damn it!
296
00:19:34,580 --> 00:19:38,300
Nina, our relationship is over.
My self-respect demands it...
297
00:19:38,380 --> 00:19:40,700
and there's nothing you can say
to make me change my mind.
298
00:19:40,780 --> 00:19:44,660
My parents are jerks. I wanna get back
at them by doing it with you on their bed.
299
00:19:49,500 --> 00:19:51,900
Except that.
Thanks, Kelso.
300
00:19:56,160 --> 00:19:58,000
[Clanging]
301
00:19:58,080 --> 00:20:00,640
Fire! Fire!
302
00:20:02,080 --> 00:20:04,440
- What are you doing?
- Well, look at this.
303
00:20:04,520 --> 00:20:06,560
Mr. Nude is still nude.
304
00:20:08,560 --> 00:20:11,320
- You're nuts.
- Wow.
305
00:20:11,400 --> 00:20:14,640
Strong words from Mr. Nude.
306
00:20:16,400 --> 00:20:20,280
We're doin' this every night
until you put on some bottoms.
307
00:20:20,360 --> 00:20:22,200
[Clanging]
308
00:20:22,280 --> 00:20:23,560
Fire!
309
00:20:23,600 --> 00:20:24,880
Fire!