1 00:00:12,470 --> 00:00:14,930 FORMAN, MAN, IT'S A TINY LITTLE SCRATCH, 2 00:00:15,098 --> 00:00:16,724 AND RED'S NEVER GONNA SEE IT. 3 00:00:16,891 --> 00:00:18,100 NO, RED SEES EVERYTHING. 4 00:00:18,268 --> 00:00:21,020 HE SEES WHEN I PUT CHEAP GAS IN THE CAR. 5 00:00:21,187 --> 00:00:22,354 I GOT IT. 6 00:00:22,522 --> 00:00:23,814 WE'LL PUT MY "GAS, GRASS, OR ASS" 7 00:00:23,982 --> 00:00:27,276 BUMPER STICKER OVER IT. 8 00:00:28,903 --> 00:00:30,070 AH, LISTEN, FORMAN. 9 00:00:30,238 --> 00:00:32,656 WHATEVER HAPPENS, WE'LL ALL TAKE THE RAP. 10 00:00:32,824 --> 00:00:34,783 YEAH. 11 00:00:38,538 --> 00:00:40,497 WHOOSH! 12 00:00:41,416 --> 00:00:42,696 HOW'D YOU SCRATCH THE CAR, ERIC? 13 00:00:42,751 --> 00:00:45,502 HAVE FUN. SEE YA, FORMAN. 14 00:00:47,005 --> 00:00:48,380 WELL? 15 00:00:48,548 --> 00:00:50,924 WELL, UH... 16 00:00:51,092 --> 00:00:53,093 SIR, I WAS, UH... 17 00:00:53,261 --> 00:00:54,661 PULLING OUT OF THIS PARKING SPACE... 18 00:00:54,679 --> 00:00:55,919 WELL, CREEPING IS MORE LIKE IT. 19 00:00:56,014 --> 00:00:57,181 I WAS CREEPING... 20 00:00:57,348 --> 00:00:58,515 YOU WERE SCREWING AROUND, 21 00:00:58,683 --> 00:00:59,883 AND YOU BACKED INTO A HYDRANT. 22 00:01:00,018 --> 00:01:01,185 I CAN SEE THE PAINT MARKS. 23 00:01:01,352 --> 00:01:02,519 NO! 24 00:01:02,687 --> 00:01:04,813 AND BY NO, I MEAN EXACTLY. 25 00:01:04,981 --> 00:01:06,148 BUT IT WASN'T MY FAULT, SIR. 26 00:01:06,316 --> 00:01:08,609 KELSO WAS GIVING ME A... 27 00:01:08,777 --> 00:01:12,029 A WHAT? 28 00:01:15,742 --> 00:01:19,369 KELSO WAS GIVING ME A... PURPLE NURPLE. 29 00:01:21,623 --> 00:01:23,373 IT'S, UH, WHEN YOU GRAB SOMEONE'S NIPPLE 30 00:01:23,541 --> 00:01:24,821 THROUGH THEIR SHIRT AND TWIST IT 31 00:01:24,959 --> 00:01:29,630 REAL HARD... 32 00:01:29,798 --> 00:01:33,801 UNTIL IT BECOMES PURPLE. 33 00:01:33,968 --> 00:01:36,762 GIVE ME THE KEYS. 34 00:01:36,930 --> 00:01:38,430 DAD, I... 35 00:01:38,598 --> 00:01:40,224 YOUR DRIVING PRIVILEGES ARE SUSPENDED 36 00:01:40,391 --> 00:01:42,768 UNTIL YOU LEARN SOME RESPONSIBILITY. 37 00:01:42,936 --> 00:01:44,645 DAD, I AM VERY RESPONSIBLE. 38 00:01:44,813 --> 00:01:46,480 NO. NO, YOU'RE NOT. 39 00:01:46,648 --> 00:01:48,440 RESPONSIBLE PEOPLE DON'T GO AROUND GETTING 40 00:01:48,608 --> 00:01:51,902 THEIR NIPPLES TWISTED. 41 00:01:53,071 --> 00:01:54,446 SEE, WHEN YOU SAY IT, THOUGH, 42 00:01:54,614 --> 00:01:56,990 IT JUST SOUNDS WEIRD. 43 00:01:58,076 --> 00:02:01,328 ♪ HANGIN' OUT ♪ 44 00:02:01,496 --> 00:02:05,082 ♪ DOWN THE STREET ♪ 45 00:02:05,250 --> 00:02:08,710 ♪ THE SAME OLD THING ♪ 46 00:02:08,878 --> 00:02:12,131 ♪ WE DID LAST WEEK ♪ 47 00:02:12,298 --> 00:02:16,135 ♪ NOT A THING TO DO ♪ 48 00:02:16,302 --> 00:02:19,471 ♪ BUT TALK TO YOU ♪ 49 00:02:19,639 --> 00:02:21,765 ♪ WHOA, YEAH ♪ 50 00:02:21,933 --> 00:02:24,476 CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY CARSEY-WERNER PRODUCTIONS AND FOX BROADCASTING COMPANY 51 00:02:24,644 --> 00:02:27,312 HELLO, WISCONSIN! 52 00:02:30,817 --> 00:02:33,485 BLOW! 53 00:02:33,653 --> 00:02:35,070 OH MY GOD. 54 00:02:35,238 --> 00:02:36,488 "HAIR DOs AND DON'Ts 55 00:02:36,656 --> 00:02:38,532 OF OLYMPIC GOLD MEDALISTS." 56 00:02:38,700 --> 00:02:40,742 OH MY GOD. IS THAT DOROTHY HAMILL? 57 00:02:40,910 --> 00:02:43,370 SHE'S A VIRGIN. 58 00:02:43,538 --> 00:02:47,541 SPEAKING OF, UM... 59 00:02:47,709 --> 00:02:48,959 YOU KNOW THOSE GIRLS AT SCHOOL 60 00:02:49,127 --> 00:02:50,460 WHO DO IT, LIKE, ALL THE TIME? 61 00:02:50,628 --> 00:02:51,795 YEAH? 62 00:02:51,963 --> 00:02:53,172 ALL RIGHT. IS IT JUST ME, 63 00:02:53,339 --> 00:02:56,341 OR DO THEY SEEM MORE RELAXED? 64 00:02:57,135 --> 00:02:59,595 HI! 65 00:02:59,762 --> 00:03:01,180 WHAT WERE YOU GUYS DOIN'? 66 00:03:01,347 --> 00:03:04,349 THEY WERE TALKING ABOUT SEX. 67 00:03:04,517 --> 00:03:05,684 COME ON, FEZ, 68 00:03:05,852 --> 00:03:07,352 CHICKS DON'T TALK ABOUT SEX, MAN. 69 00:03:07,520 --> 00:03:09,855 IT'S DIRTY. 70 00:03:10,023 --> 00:03:12,107 YES, WE DO, 71 00:03:12,275 --> 00:03:14,651 ESPECIALLY WHEN IT INVOLVES MICHAEL KELSO. 72 00:03:14,819 --> 00:03:15,986 MY DREAMBOAT. 73 00:03:16,154 --> 00:03:17,321 OH, GREAT. 74 00:03:17,488 --> 00:03:19,608 NOW WE HAVE TO TALK ABOUT JACKIE AND KELSO'S SEX LIFE. 75 00:03:19,699 --> 00:03:21,408 THIS IS MY WORST NIGHTMARE. 76 00:03:21,576 --> 00:03:23,076 ALL RIGHT, YOU KNOW WHAT? 77 00:03:23,244 --> 00:03:24,924 BEFORE YOU GUYS GOT HERE, JACKIE AND I WERE 78 00:03:25,079 --> 00:03:27,956 ACTUALLY HAVING A PRETTY GOOD TIME. 79 00:03:30,501 --> 00:03:33,670 I KNOW. I WAS SURPRISED TOO. 80 00:03:36,382 --> 00:03:38,342 HEY, DONNA, YOU WANNA GO TO MY HOUSE? 81 00:03:38,509 --> 00:03:40,886 YOU KNOW WHAT? OKAY. 82 00:03:44,891 --> 00:03:46,850 SO, WHAT DO YOU GUYS WANNA DO? 83 00:03:47,018 --> 00:03:48,644 WE COULD WALK TO THE HUB. 84 00:03:48,811 --> 00:03:49,978 TOO FAR. 85 00:03:50,146 --> 00:03:53,232 WE COULD WALK TO... TOO FAR. 86 00:03:53,399 --> 00:03:54,983 MAN, THIS SUCKS. 87 00:03:55,151 --> 00:03:56,985 I JUST CAN'T BELIEVE THAT RED TOOK AWAY MY CAR 88 00:03:57,153 --> 00:03:59,071 BECAUSE OF ONE STUPID LITTLE SCRATCH. 89 00:03:59,239 --> 00:04:00,405 I KNOW, MAN. 90 00:04:00,573 --> 00:04:01,990 WHO WOULD THINK RED WOULD OVERREACT? 91 00:04:02,158 --> 00:04:03,867 I DID. 92 00:04:04,035 --> 00:04:06,787 I HAVE NOTICED RED IS A REAL HARD-ASS. 93 00:04:07,455 --> 00:04:08,705 ONE TOKE OVER THE LINE, 94 00:04:08,873 --> 00:04:10,165 SWEET JESUS, YOU ARE CLOBBERED. 95 00:04:10,333 --> 00:04:13,460 YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING? 96 00:04:13,628 --> 00:04:14,836 HEY, GUYS. 97 00:04:15,004 --> 00:04:16,546 CHECK IT OUT. 98 00:04:16,714 --> 00:04:17,881 DID YOU GET A CAR? 99 00:04:18,049 --> 00:04:19,925 YEAH. MY COUSIN SULLY LOANED ME HIS WHEELS. 100 00:04:20,093 --> 00:04:22,886 SO, WHERE TO? 101 00:04:27,058 --> 00:04:28,267 YOU JUST WANNA HANG? 102 00:04:28,434 --> 00:04:30,560 YEAH. 103 00:04:32,730 --> 00:04:34,356 SNOOKUMS? 104 00:04:34,524 --> 00:04:36,650 YES, POOKY? 105 00:04:36,818 --> 00:04:38,944 DO YOU WANT TURKEY OR TUNA SANDWICHES 106 00:04:39,112 --> 00:04:41,029 TONIGHT FOR DINNER? 107 00:04:41,197 --> 00:04:42,531 TONIGHT? 108 00:04:42,699 --> 00:04:44,950 TONIGHT'S MEAT LOAF NIGHT. 109 00:04:45,118 --> 00:04:46,576 RIGHT, BUT I HAVE MY CLASS 110 00:04:46,744 --> 00:04:49,037 AT THE COMMUNITY COLLEGE IN KENOSHA TONIGHT. 111 00:04:49,205 --> 00:04:50,747 I TOLD YOU ABOUT IT LAST WEEK. 112 00:04:50,915 --> 00:04:52,833 YOU MOST CERTAINLY DID NOT. 113 00:04:53,001 --> 00:04:55,127 YES, I DID. REMEMBER? 114 00:04:55,295 --> 00:04:57,629 YOU WERE WATCHING "BARETTA." 115 00:04:57,797 --> 00:04:59,237 OH, MIDGE, YOU CAN'T TELL ME ANYTHING 116 00:04:59,299 --> 00:05:00,465 WHILE I'M WATCHING "BARETTA." 117 00:05:00,633 --> 00:05:02,467 IT'S COMPLICATED. 118 00:05:02,635 --> 00:05:04,075 BOB, I'VE BEEN TELLING YOU FOR MONTHS 119 00:05:04,178 --> 00:05:07,723 HOW I'VE NEEDED TO EXPAND MY MIND. 120 00:05:07,890 --> 00:05:09,057 IS THIS ABOUT JEWELRY? 121 00:05:09,225 --> 00:05:11,143 'CAUSE I'LL BUY YOU JEWELRY. 122 00:05:11,311 --> 00:05:12,561 NO, SWEETIE. 123 00:05:12,729 --> 00:05:15,397 IT'S ABOUT ME BECOMING A WHOLE PERSON. 124 00:05:15,565 --> 00:05:17,149 MIDGIE, DON'T TAKE THIS THE WRONG WAY, 125 00:05:17,317 --> 00:05:19,818 BUT THAT'S JUST STUPID. 126 00:05:19,986 --> 00:05:22,321 WELL, I DON'T THINK IT'S YOUR DECISION. 127 00:05:22,488 --> 00:05:23,822 WELL, I'M THE MAN OF THE HOUSE, 128 00:05:23,990 --> 00:05:26,825 AND I SAY YOU'RE NOT GOIN' TO COMMUNITY COLLEGE. 129 00:05:26,993 --> 00:05:28,577 YOU CAN'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO, 130 00:05:28,745 --> 00:05:31,538 YOU BIG... ASS. 131 00:05:43,009 --> 00:05:45,052 WHAT ARE WE LOOKING AT? 132 00:05:45,219 --> 00:05:48,138 THAT SCRATCH. 133 00:05:56,731 --> 00:05:58,774 WHAT SCRATCH? 134 00:05:58,941 --> 00:06:01,485 THE SCRATCH THAT ERIC PUT IN THE CAR. 135 00:06:01,652 --> 00:06:03,987 I GOT MOST OF IT OUT WITH RUBBING COMPOUND. 136 00:06:04,155 --> 00:06:05,781 YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN IT BEFORE. 137 00:06:05,948 --> 00:06:08,533 IT WAS A DOOZIE. 138 00:06:08,701 --> 00:06:10,619 WELL, THAT MUST HAVE BEEN QUITE AN ACCIDENT. 139 00:06:10,787 --> 00:06:14,539 WAS HE KILLED? 140 00:06:14,707 --> 00:06:15,957 SEE? 141 00:06:16,125 --> 00:06:19,836 THAT'S WHERE HIS SMART MOUTH COMES FROM? 142 00:06:20,004 --> 00:06:23,173 DRIVER SAFETY IS SERIOUS BUSINESS, KITTY. 143 00:06:23,341 --> 00:06:24,966 WELL, YOU'RE RIGHT, RED. 144 00:06:25,134 --> 00:06:27,302 WE SHOULD TEACH HIM A LESSON. 145 00:06:27,470 --> 00:06:29,179 SO WHEN HE COMES HOME, I'LL HOLD HIM DOWN, 146 00:06:29,347 --> 00:06:32,349 AND YOU BURN HIM WITH A CIGARETTE. 147 00:06:37,688 --> 00:06:38,980 JUST SO YOU KNOW, DONNA, 148 00:06:39,148 --> 00:06:41,525 WHEN I FINALLY DECIDE TO DO IT WITH MICHAEL, 149 00:06:41,692 --> 00:06:43,819 I HAVE THE WHOLE THING PLANNED OUT. 150 00:06:43,986 --> 00:06:48,698 FIRST, I'LL BE WEARING SOME VERY SEXY RENOIR. 151 00:06:48,866 --> 00:06:51,576 DON'T YOU MEAN PEIGNOIR? 152 00:06:51,744 --> 00:06:54,913 YEAH, OKAY, WHATEVER. STOP RUINING THIS, DONNA. 153 00:06:55,081 --> 00:06:57,082 OKAY. 154 00:06:57,250 --> 00:07:02,337 AND THEN THERE'LL BE CANDLES EVERYWHERE. 155 00:07:02,505 --> 00:07:08,218 AND ALSO THERE'LL BE A GIGANTIC BANNER. 156 00:07:08,386 --> 00:07:10,429 THEN MICHAEL WILL COME IN, 157 00:07:10,596 --> 00:07:13,932 AND THE WIND WILL BE BLOWING. 158 00:07:14,100 --> 00:07:19,312 IT'LL BE THE MOST MAGICAL NIGHT OF OUR LIVES. 159 00:07:23,025 --> 00:07:25,861 SO, IF YOU HAVE IT ALL PLANNED OUT, 160 00:07:26,028 --> 00:07:27,612 WHY ARE YOU, UH... 161 00:07:27,780 --> 00:07:29,656 WHY YOU STILL WAITING? 162 00:07:29,824 --> 00:07:32,284 I WANT IT TO BE REALLY, REALLY SPECIAL. 163 00:07:32,452 --> 00:07:33,952 WELL, I MEAN, HOW CAN IT NOT 164 00:07:34,120 --> 00:07:35,287 WITH A GIGANTIC BANNER? 165 00:07:35,455 --> 00:07:37,581 EXACTLY. 166 00:07:38,499 --> 00:07:40,083 BOB DOESN'T WANT ME TO TAKE THIS CLASS, 167 00:07:40,251 --> 00:07:41,793 BUT IT SOUNDS SO EXCITING. 168 00:07:41,961 --> 00:07:44,004 IT'S ALL ABOUT FEMALE EMPOWERMENT. 169 00:07:44,172 --> 00:07:47,090 IT'S CALLED "THE WOMAN WARRIOR:" 170 00:07:47,258 --> 00:07:50,302 FIGHTING FEMALE STEREOTYPES." 171 00:07:50,470 --> 00:07:53,346 THAT'S THE PROFESSOR. ISN'T HE CUTE? 172 00:07:54,432 --> 00:07:56,641 UH-HUH, DARLING. 173 00:07:56,809 --> 00:07:59,311 SO? YOU WANNA COME? 174 00:07:59,479 --> 00:08:00,687 OH, WELL, UM... 175 00:08:00,855 --> 00:08:03,815 I CAN'T SAY I'M NOT TEMPTED. 176 00:08:03,983 --> 00:08:06,776 YES, I CAN. I'M NOT TEMPTED. 177 00:08:06,944 --> 00:08:09,070 DON'T YOU WANT TO BECOME AN EMPOWERED WOMAN? 178 00:08:09,238 --> 00:08:10,405 WELL, YOU KNOW. I JUST... 179 00:08:10,573 --> 00:08:12,949 I DON'T HAVE TIME TO BE AN EMPOWERED WOMAN. 180 00:08:13,117 --> 00:08:16,077 I'M TOO BUSY RUNNING THIS HOUSEHOLD. 181 00:08:16,245 --> 00:08:18,455 YOU'RE SO LUCKY, KITTY. YOU HAVE IT ALL. 182 00:08:18,623 --> 00:08:20,832 A GREAT FAMILY AND A GREAT CAREER. 183 00:08:21,000 --> 00:08:23,543 HOW DID YOU TALK RED INTO LETTING YOU WORK? 184 00:08:23,711 --> 00:08:25,670 OKAY, WELL, ONE DAY WE SAT DOWN, 185 00:08:25,838 --> 00:08:27,130 WE DID ALL OUR BILLS, 186 00:08:27,298 --> 00:08:30,258 AND WE REALIZED WE WERE GONNA LOSE THE HOUSE. 187 00:08:33,930 --> 00:08:37,015 THIS BACK SEAT SUCKS. 188 00:08:37,183 --> 00:08:38,642 IT'S... IT'S TOO SMALL. 189 00:08:38,809 --> 00:08:41,144 FEZ'S LEG IS TOUCHING MINE. 190 00:08:41,312 --> 00:08:44,439 NO, YOUR LEG IS TOUCHING MINE. 191 00:08:44,607 --> 00:08:46,483 I SHOULDN'T EVEN BE IN THE BACK SEAT. 192 00:08:46,651 --> 00:08:48,818 I SHOULD BE DRIVING MY OWN CAR. 193 00:08:48,986 --> 00:08:50,906 WELL, THE REASON YOU'RE NOT DRIVING YOUR OWN CAR, 194 00:08:50,947 --> 00:08:52,781 FORMAN, IS BECAUSE YOU'RE IRRESPONSIBLE 195 00:08:52,949 --> 00:08:56,201 AND YOU SCRATCHED IT. 196 00:08:56,369 --> 00:08:58,537 HEH, THAT'S A GOOD ONE. 197 00:08:58,704 --> 00:09:01,873 AAH! 198 00:09:02,041 --> 00:09:06,127 I'M TRYING TO DRIVE THE CAR HERE, MAN. 199 00:09:06,796 --> 00:09:10,048 [TURNS ON RADIO] 200 00:09:10,216 --> 00:09:12,634 NO, PUT IT BACK. I LIKE THAT SONG. 201 00:09:12,802 --> 00:09:16,096 WHY DON'T YOU PIPE DOWN THERE, BACK-SEAT CHARLIE? 202 00:09:16,264 --> 00:09:18,723 ♪ AIN'T NOBODY GONNA TAKE MY GIRL ♪ 203 00:09:18,891 --> 00:09:21,560 ALL RIGHT! 204 00:09:21,727 --> 00:09:24,729 THE BACK SEAT SUCKS. 205 00:09:24,897 --> 00:09:28,608 WELCOME TO MY SAD LITTLE WORLD. 206 00:09:30,528 --> 00:09:34,197 [MALE ANNOUNCER] 207 00:09:38,828 --> 00:09:40,078 OH, GREAT. NO PICKLES. 208 00:09:40,246 --> 00:09:42,664 NOW WE GOTTA GO BACK. 209 00:09:42,832 --> 00:09:45,041 [ALL] SHUT UP! 210 00:09:47,169 --> 00:09:48,545 HEY, WHY DOES SULLY HAVE A STATUE 211 00:09:48,713 --> 00:09:52,090 OF THE VIRGIN MARY ON HIS DASHBOARD? 212 00:09:52,258 --> 00:09:54,884 MAYBE HE'S, LIKE, RELIGIOUS OR SOMETHING? 213 00:09:55,052 --> 00:09:58,054 WASN'T SULLY IN PRISON FOR ARSON? 214 00:09:58,222 --> 00:09:59,889 YEAH, PEOPLE THAT BURN STUFF 215 00:10:00,057 --> 00:10:04,269 BELIEVE IN GOD, TOO, HYDE. 216 00:10:04,437 --> 00:10:08,315 WHY DOES THE KEY CHAIN SAY "I LOVE BINGO"? 217 00:10:08,482 --> 00:10:11,276 SULLY MUST LOVE BINGO. 218 00:10:11,444 --> 00:10:12,611 ALL RIGHT. 219 00:10:12,778 --> 00:10:15,030 I'M STARTING TO THINK THAT MAYBE THIS ISN'T SULLY'S CAR. 220 00:10:15,197 --> 00:10:16,781 THEN WHOSE CAR IS IT? 221 00:10:16,949 --> 00:10:20,910 [SIREN BLARING] 222 00:10:28,377 --> 00:10:31,838 ♪ OH YEAH! ♪ 223 00:10:41,474 --> 00:10:44,392 THIS IS GREAT. I'M DEAD. 224 00:10:44,560 --> 00:10:46,061 YOU KNOW, WHEN WE WERE IN MY CAR 225 00:10:46,228 --> 00:10:47,948 AND I WAS RUNNING THE SHOW, I DON'T REMEMBER 226 00:10:48,022 --> 00:10:50,732 ONE SINGLE TIME WE ALL GOT ARRESTED. 227 00:10:50,900 --> 00:10:52,484 THAT'S TRUE. 228 00:10:52,652 --> 00:10:54,027 HEY, ERIC, WILL YOU JUST RELAX? 229 00:10:54,195 --> 00:10:55,779 WE'RE ALL IN TROUBLE HERE. 230 00:10:55,946 --> 00:10:57,364 OH, NO, NO, NO. 231 00:10:57,531 --> 00:10:59,115 NO, NO, NO, NO. 232 00:10:59,283 --> 00:11:01,326 WE'RE NOT ALL IN TROUBLE HERE. 233 00:11:01,494 --> 00:11:02,911 YOUR PARENTS HAVE 7 KIDS. 234 00:11:03,079 --> 00:11:05,830 THEY WON'T EVEN NOTICE YOU'RE GONE. 235 00:11:05,998 --> 00:11:09,000 YOUR PARENTS DON'T EVEN LIVE IN THIS COUNTRY. 236 00:11:09,168 --> 00:11:14,339 AND YOUR MOM... PROBABLY ONE CELL OVER. 237 00:11:14,507 --> 00:11:16,049 SO THAT JUST LEAVES ME. 238 00:11:16,217 --> 00:11:18,843 I'M THE ONLY ONE WHO'S REALLY IN TROUBLE HERE. 239 00:11:19,011 --> 00:11:21,096 LOOK, FORMAN, I'LL BE IN AS MUCH TROUBLE AS YOU ARE 240 00:11:21,263 --> 00:11:25,850 AS SOON AS EDNA SOBERS UP. 241 00:11:26,018 --> 00:11:31,856 I WILL BE DEPORTED. 242 00:11:32,024 --> 00:11:34,567 THEY'RE GONNA SEND ME BACK TO MY HOMELAND, 243 00:11:34,735 --> 00:11:36,986 THE BEAUTIFUL ISLAND OF... 244 00:11:37,697 --> 00:11:39,906 OKAY, WHO'S THE RINGLEADER HERE? 245 00:11:40,074 --> 00:11:42,409 [ALL] HE IS. 246 00:11:42,576 --> 00:11:44,119 YOU GET ONE PHONE CALL. 247 00:11:44,286 --> 00:11:45,453 TO ANYWHERE? 248 00:11:45,621 --> 00:11:49,124 ONE LOCAL PHONE CALL. 249 00:11:50,668 --> 00:11:52,127 SO, WHO SHOULD WE CALL? 250 00:11:52,294 --> 00:11:55,296 I'D CALL RED, BUT I FEEL SAFER IN JAIL. 251 00:11:56,841 --> 00:12:01,428 I, UH, DON'T KNOW MY PHONE NUMBER. 252 00:12:01,595 --> 00:12:04,180 I CAN'T CALL EDNA, MAN. IT'S POKER NIGHT. 253 00:12:04,348 --> 00:12:05,628 NO OFFENSE, BUT ISN'T EVERY NIGHT 254 00:12:05,766 --> 00:12:09,269 "POKE 'ER NIGHT" FOR EDNA? 255 00:12:14,442 --> 00:12:15,608 NO, NO, NO. I GOT IT. 256 00:12:15,776 --> 00:12:18,236 I'LL CALL JACKIE. 257 00:12:20,698 --> 00:12:22,157 HER DAD'S A LAWYER, 258 00:12:22,324 --> 00:12:26,953 AND SHE'S GOT A CHECKBOOK. 259 00:12:27,121 --> 00:12:28,288 HELLO? 260 00:12:28,456 --> 00:12:31,583 JACKIE? OH, THANK GOD YOU'RE HOME. 261 00:12:31,751 --> 00:12:33,042 I WAS DRIVING A STOLEN CAR, 262 00:12:33,210 --> 00:12:34,961 AND I GOT ARRESTED. 263 00:12:35,129 --> 00:12:37,046 OH, MICHAEL, THIS IS JUST LIKE THE BOOK 264 00:12:37,214 --> 00:12:39,132 "PRISONER OF LOVE" WHERE CLIFF, 265 00:12:39,300 --> 00:12:41,468 THE RUGGED YET SWEET MOTORCYCLE MECHANIC, 266 00:12:41,635 --> 00:12:43,845 WAS THROWN INTO JAIL, 267 00:12:44,013 --> 00:12:45,889 AND THEN HIS TRUE LOVE TASHA WAS FORCED 268 00:12:46,056 --> 00:12:48,767 TO BE A SLAVE FOR THIS REALLY RICH MEAN GUY. 269 00:12:48,934 --> 00:12:50,174 JACKIE, I'M NOT KIDDING AROUND. 270 00:12:50,311 --> 00:12:53,730 I'M REALLY IN JAIL. 271 00:12:53,898 --> 00:12:56,274 OH MY GOD. ARE YOU OKAY? 272 00:12:56,442 --> 00:12:58,026 YEAH, I GUESS, 273 00:12:58,194 --> 00:13:00,278 BUT I'M A LITTLE COLD. 274 00:13:00,446 --> 00:13:03,948 IT'S LONELY IN THE JOINT, JACKIE. 275 00:13:04,116 --> 00:13:05,950 OH MY GOD. YOU'RE REALLY IN JAIL. 276 00:13:06,118 --> 00:13:08,077 WHAT IF YOU NEVER GET OUT? 277 00:13:08,245 --> 00:13:11,289 THAT WOULD REALLY... SUCK? 278 00:13:11,457 --> 00:13:13,291 YES, IT WOULD, MICHAEL, AND I PROMISE, 279 00:13:13,459 --> 00:13:14,739 THE MINUTE YOU GET OUT OF PRISON, 280 00:13:14,877 --> 00:13:17,045 I'M GONNA PROVE MY LOVE TO YOU. 281 00:13:17,213 --> 00:13:20,840 COOL. THANKS. 282 00:13:21,008 --> 00:13:22,175 MICHAEL, DO YOU EVEN KNOW 283 00:13:22,343 --> 00:13:23,593 WHAT I'M SAYING TO YOU? 284 00:13:23,761 --> 00:13:26,221 YEAH. 285 00:13:26,388 --> 00:13:29,098 NO. 286 00:13:29,266 --> 00:13:31,976 WE'RE GONNA MAKE LOVE, YOU IDIOT. 287 00:13:32,144 --> 00:13:34,771 ALL RIGHT! 288 00:13:45,199 --> 00:13:46,908 YOU TWO HAVE A NICE LITTLE TALK? 289 00:13:47,076 --> 00:13:49,035 OH YEAH! 290 00:13:51,539 --> 00:13:52,747 YOU KNOW WHAT'S FUNNY? 291 00:13:52,915 --> 00:13:54,082 WHAT? 292 00:13:54,250 --> 00:13:55,458 NOTHING! 293 00:13:55,626 --> 00:13:59,295 BECAUSE YOU FORGOT TO ASK HER FOR HELP, YOU MORON! 294 00:14:00,464 --> 00:14:03,216 OH MY GOD. YOU'RE RIGHT. 295 00:14:03,384 --> 00:14:05,635 GIVE ME ANOTHER DIME. 296 00:14:05,803 --> 00:14:08,263 WE ONLY HAD ONE DIME. 297 00:14:08,430 --> 00:14:11,516 WE ONLY GOT ONE PHONE CALL. 298 00:14:11,684 --> 00:14:14,143 OH MY GOD. 299 00:14:14,311 --> 00:14:15,478 SOMEBODY GIVE ME A SPOON. 300 00:14:15,646 --> 00:14:19,023 I'M GONNA DIG MY WAY OUTTA HERE. 301 00:14:25,030 --> 00:14:26,197 LOOK AT THIS. 302 00:14:26,365 --> 00:14:27,725 HERE WE ARE SITTING DOWN TO DINNER, 303 00:14:27,741 --> 00:14:29,367 ERIC'S NOT EVEN HOME YET. 304 00:14:29,535 --> 00:14:31,494 WELL, HONEY, YOU TOOK AWAY HIS CAR. 305 00:14:31,662 --> 00:14:35,164 HE HAS TO WALK EVERYWHERE. 306 00:14:35,332 --> 00:14:37,834 WALKING'S GOOD FOR HIM. 307 00:14:38,002 --> 00:14:40,879 RED, WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE SO HARD ON HIM? 308 00:14:41,046 --> 00:14:43,715 SAME REASON MY OLD MAN WAS HARD ON ME... 309 00:14:43,883 --> 00:14:46,634 TO PREPARE ME FOR THE WORLD. 310 00:14:46,802 --> 00:14:49,262 YOU KNOW, KITTY, WHEN I WAS HIS AGE, 311 00:14:49,430 --> 00:14:52,307 I COULD HAVE PARACHUTED ONTO A DESERTED ISLAND 312 00:14:52,474 --> 00:14:54,851 WITH NOTHING BUT A SWISS ARMY KNIFE, 313 00:14:55,019 --> 00:14:57,854 AND I'D HAVE SURVIVED. 314 00:14:58,022 --> 00:14:59,355 WELL, OKAY, THEN, WE'VE LEARNED SOMETHING... 315 00:14:59,523 --> 00:15:02,942 NO SKYDIVING FOR ERIC. 316 00:15:03,110 --> 00:15:06,070 I TELL YOU, KITTY, THE WORLD IS A TOUGH PLACE. 317 00:15:06,238 --> 00:15:08,698 YOU DROP YOUR GUARD FOR ONE SECOND, 318 00:15:08,866 --> 00:15:12,994 AND IT'LL KICK YOU RIGHT IN THE ASS. 319 00:15:13,162 --> 00:15:17,749 WELL, YOU'RE RIGHT, RED, THE WORLD IS HARD. 320 00:15:17,917 --> 00:15:20,919 SO WOULDN'T IT BE NICE IF ERIC CAME HOME TO A PLACE 321 00:15:21,086 --> 00:15:24,255 THAT WASN'T? 322 00:15:24,423 --> 00:15:25,840 ALL RIGHT, KITTY, 323 00:15:26,008 --> 00:15:27,717 WHEN YOU WIN THE LOTTERY, 324 00:15:27,885 --> 00:15:31,054 YOU CAN BUY HIM DISNEYLAND. 325 00:15:34,433 --> 00:15:36,267 I CAN'T BELIEVE SHE WENT TO THAT CLASS. 326 00:15:36,435 --> 00:15:40,939 MARRIED WOMEN DO NOT ABANDON THEIR FAMILIES. 327 00:15:41,106 --> 00:15:43,942 SURE THEY DO, DAD. IT'S THE SEVENTIES. 328 00:15:44,735 --> 00:15:45,944 I KNOW WHAT DECADE IT IS. 329 00:15:46,111 --> 00:15:47,612 DOESN'T CHANGE THE FACT I'M EATING A SANDWICH 330 00:15:47,780 --> 00:15:50,114 INSTEAD OF A HOT MEAL. 331 00:15:50,282 --> 00:15:53,409 WELL, WANT ME TO MICROWAVE IT FOR YOU? 332 00:15:54,453 --> 00:15:56,996 I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY SHE NEEDS THIS. 333 00:15:57,164 --> 00:15:58,706 I'VE GIVEN HER A GREAT LIFE. 334 00:15:58,874 --> 00:16:01,292 DAD, THAT'S NOT THE ISSUE. 335 00:16:01,460 --> 00:16:02,961 THE WHOLE POINT OF THE EQUAL RIGHTS 336 00:16:03,128 --> 00:16:04,568 AMENDMENT IS SO THAT WOMEN DON'T HAVE 337 00:16:04,630 --> 00:16:07,006 TO DEFINE THEMSELVES BY A MAN. 338 00:16:07,174 --> 00:16:08,341 DONNA, IS THIS ABOUT CLOTHES? 339 00:16:08,509 --> 00:16:10,468 'CAUSE I COULD BUY YOU CLOTHES. 340 00:16:12,930 --> 00:16:15,223 THIS IS POINTLESS. 341 00:16:15,391 --> 00:16:16,557 HEY, WHILE YOU'RE UP, 342 00:16:16,725 --> 00:16:19,644 YOU WANNA GET DADDY A BEER? 343 00:16:19,812 --> 00:16:22,105 HONEY? 344 00:16:23,941 --> 00:16:26,317 ERIC, YOU GOTTA DO SOMETHING, MAN. 345 00:16:26,485 --> 00:16:27,652 ME? 346 00:16:27,820 --> 00:16:30,196 HEY, WHAT ABOUT YOU, KELSO, OR HYDE? 347 00:16:30,364 --> 00:16:35,159 I CAN'T TALK TO COPS, MAN. I GO INSANE WITH RAGE. 348 00:16:35,327 --> 00:16:38,037 OH, AND... ME TOO. 349 00:16:38,205 --> 00:16:41,082 NUTS. WHOO! 350 00:16:41,250 --> 00:16:43,459 ERIC, YOU GOTTA HELP US. 351 00:16:43,627 --> 00:16:48,840 SO NOW I'M BACK IN CHARGE? THIS IS SO TYPICAL. 352 00:16:50,509 --> 00:16:52,010 OKAY, YOU KNOW WHAT? FINE. 353 00:16:52,177 --> 00:16:54,512 ONCE AGAIN, I'LL SUCK IT UP, BE THE MAN, 354 00:16:54,680 --> 00:16:57,473 AND SAVE ALL OF YOUR SORRY ASSES. 355 00:17:01,562 --> 00:17:04,480 OFFICER, I NEED TO TALK TO YOU, PLEASE. 356 00:17:08,861 --> 00:17:11,154 YOU GOTTA LET ME GO! 357 00:17:11,321 --> 00:17:12,488 PLEASE, GOD! 358 00:17:12,656 --> 00:17:14,657 MY DAD'S GONNA KILL ME. 359 00:17:14,825 --> 00:17:16,284 YOU STOLE A CAR, KID. 360 00:17:16,452 --> 00:17:19,412 WHAT KINDA COP WOULD I BE IF I JUST LET YOU GO? 361 00:17:19,580 --> 00:17:23,124 MY BEST FRIEND THE COP? 362 00:17:23,292 --> 00:17:24,625 LOOK, IT REALLY WASN'T MY FAULT. 363 00:17:24,793 --> 00:17:26,461 WE BORROWED IT FROM A FRIEND. 364 00:17:26,628 --> 00:17:28,108 YEAH, I HAVEN'T HEARD THAT ONE BEFORE. 365 00:17:28,255 --> 00:17:29,547 HEY, GUESS WHAT? 366 00:17:29,715 --> 00:17:31,049 THEY DIDN'T REALLY STEAL THE CAR. 367 00:17:31,216 --> 00:17:32,633 THEY BORROWED IT FROM A FRIEND. 368 00:17:32,801 --> 00:17:34,343 WELL, ACTUALLY, THEY DID. 369 00:17:34,511 --> 00:17:36,137 TURNS OUT THIS GUY SULLY BORROWED IT 370 00:17:36,305 --> 00:17:37,930 FROM HIS GRANDMOTHER, AND SHE FORGOT 371 00:17:38,098 --> 00:17:39,891 AND CALLED IT IN STOLEN. 372 00:17:40,059 --> 00:17:42,852 NICE OLD LADY, THOUGH. SHE PLAYS BINGO. 373 00:17:44,146 --> 00:17:45,313 OH MY GOD. THIS IS GREAT. 374 00:17:45,481 --> 00:17:46,647 SO WE'RE FREE TO GO? 375 00:17:46,815 --> 00:17:47,982 YEAH. WHICH ONE ARE YOU? 376 00:17:48,150 --> 00:17:49,567 ERIC FORMAN. 377 00:17:49,735 --> 00:17:51,194 FORMAN? 378 00:17:51,361 --> 00:17:54,197 IS YOUR DAD RED FORMAN? 379 00:17:54,364 --> 00:17:56,282 UH... YEAH. 380 00:17:56,450 --> 00:17:59,035 YOU POOR BASTARD. 381 00:18:03,499 --> 00:18:04,665 THANK YOU. 382 00:18:04,833 --> 00:18:07,085 HERE. 383 00:18:15,219 --> 00:18:16,427 SO? 384 00:18:16,595 --> 00:18:19,555 SO, CALL A CAB. WE'RE SPRUNG. 385 00:18:20,599 --> 00:18:22,850 WHAT? WE'RE FREE? 386 00:18:23,018 --> 00:18:24,894 ALL CHARGES DROPPED. 387 00:18:25,062 --> 00:18:28,481 WAIT, THAT IS WHAT YOU WANTED, RIGHT? 388 00:18:33,278 --> 00:18:35,738 LET'S GET THE HELL OUTTA HERE. 389 00:18:46,375 --> 00:18:47,959 OH... 390 00:18:48,127 --> 00:18:50,086 HI, BOB. 391 00:18:50,921 --> 00:18:53,673 MIDGE, I, UH... I BEEN THINKING. 392 00:18:53,841 --> 00:18:55,241 IF TAKING THAT CLASS MADE YOU HAPPY, 393 00:18:55,384 --> 00:18:57,969 THEN I GUESS I'M HAPPY. 394 00:18:58,137 --> 00:19:00,638 OH, SWEETIE, IT MEANS SO MUCH TO ME, 395 00:19:00,806 --> 00:19:02,086 AND IT'S ONLY TWICE A WEEK, SO... 396 00:19:02,224 --> 00:19:03,474 WHOA, WHOA, WHOA. 397 00:19:03,642 --> 00:19:06,269 I THOUGHT THIS WAS A ONE-TIME DEAL. 398 00:19:07,354 --> 00:19:09,647 BOB, YOU CAN'T LEARN TOTAL FEMALE EMPOWERMENT 399 00:19:09,815 --> 00:19:11,315 IN ONE NIGHT. 400 00:19:11,483 --> 00:19:14,318 IT TAKES 10 NIGHTS. 401 00:19:14,486 --> 00:19:15,653 WAIT. UH-UH. 402 00:19:15,821 --> 00:19:18,739 MIDGE, YOU'RE NOT GOING BACK. 403 00:19:19,491 --> 00:19:21,492 APHRODITE, THE GODDESS OF WAR, WOULDN'T TAKE THIS, 404 00:19:21,660 --> 00:19:23,786 AND NEITHER WILL I. 405 00:19:31,628 --> 00:19:32,795 HEY, DAD. 406 00:19:32,963 --> 00:19:35,298 HOLD IT. 407 00:19:39,386 --> 00:19:43,598 ABOUT THE CAR... 408 00:19:43,765 --> 00:19:46,309 I KNOW IT WASN'T... 409 00:19:48,478 --> 00:19:51,272 [CLEARS THROAT] AND I, UH... 410 00:19:54,359 --> 00:19:57,236 YOU SEE, WHEN I WAS A KID... 411 00:20:02,326 --> 00:20:05,286 MAYBE I CAME DOWN... 412 00:20:06,580 --> 00:20:09,332 EH, HERE'S THE KEYS. 413 00:20:10,709 --> 00:20:13,044 THANK YOU, SIR. 414 00:20:13,462 --> 00:20:14,712 SO, WHERE YOU BEEN ALL NIGHT? 415 00:20:14,880 --> 00:20:16,422 PRISON. 416 00:20:16,590 --> 00:20:19,300 YEAH, OKAY. 417 00:20:23,305 --> 00:20:24,472 JACKIE! 418 00:20:24,640 --> 00:20:27,266 MICHAEL! YOU'VE BEEN SPRUNG! 419 00:20:29,895 --> 00:20:31,062 YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE 420 00:20:31,230 --> 00:20:34,065 ON THE INSIDE, JACKIE. 421 00:20:34,233 --> 00:20:37,109 DID THEY BEAT YOU? 422 00:20:37,277 --> 00:20:39,946 YEAH. 423 00:20:40,113 --> 00:20:41,739 DAMN THOSE POLICE. 424 00:20:41,907 --> 00:20:43,282 OH, NO. IT WAS HYDE, 425 00:20:43,450 --> 00:20:45,910 BUT HE REALLY FROGGED ME. 426 00:20:46,078 --> 00:20:48,579 OH, POOR BABY. 427 00:20:48,747 --> 00:20:50,706 THANKS, J. 428 00:20:52,417 --> 00:20:55,086 OKAY, SO LET'S DO THIS THING. 429 00:20:55,254 --> 00:20:56,462 THIS IS SO PERFECT. 430 00:20:56,630 --> 00:20:58,256 I DON'T EVEN MISS THE PEIGNOIR, 431 00:20:58,423 --> 00:21:00,383 THE PIRATE SHIRT, OR THE WIND. 432 00:21:00,550 --> 00:21:02,510 WHAT ABOUT THE BANNER? 433 00:21:02,678 --> 00:21:04,595 IT'S OKAY. 434 00:21:04,763 --> 00:21:09,267 THE IMPORTANT THING IS I'M HERE WITH YOU. 435 00:21:09,434 --> 00:21:13,688 AND I'M PREPARED TO GIVE MYSELF TO YOU, 436 00:21:13,855 --> 00:21:17,525 BODY, MIND, AND SOUL. 437 00:21:19,152 --> 00:21:21,487 MICHAEL, THIS IS GONNA BE THE MOST MAGICAL NIGHT 438 00:21:21,655 --> 00:21:25,074 OF OUR LIVES. 439 00:21:28,620 --> 00:21:30,788 OH YEAH. AND ONE MORE THING. 440 00:21:30,956 --> 00:21:32,456 MY PARENTS ARE AT THE A & P, 441 00:21:32,624 --> 00:21:35,251 SO WE ONLY HAVE, LIKE, 15 MINUTES. 442 00:21:38,130 --> 00:21:46,130 ♪♪♪ 443 00:21:56,606 --> 00:21:58,065 YOU GUYS ENJOYING YOUR BURGERS? 444 00:21:58,233 --> 00:21:59,400 GOT ENOUGH PICKLES ON THEM? 445 00:21:59,568 --> 00:22:00,848 THAT'S HOW FATSO BURGER DOES 'EM. 446 00:22:00,902 --> 00:22:02,069 LOTS AND LOTS OF PICKLES. 447 00:22:02,237 --> 00:22:04,697 YES, YES. 448 00:22:04,865 --> 00:22:06,157 [MUMBLING] YEAH. GREAT. 449 00:22:06,325 --> 00:22:07,533 GOT ENOUGH ROOM BACK THERE? 450 00:22:07,701 --> 00:22:08,868 ACTUALLY, IT'S A LITTLE BIT CROWDED. 451 00:22:09,036 --> 00:22:11,120 GOOD, THAT'S THE WAY IT SHOULD BE. 452 00:22:11,288 --> 00:22:13,497 YES, YES. 453 00:22:13,665 --> 00:22:14,999 I FEEL LIKE GOING TO THE MOVIES. 454 00:22:15,167 --> 00:22:16,334 WHERE DO YOU GUYS WANNA GO? 455 00:22:16,501 --> 00:22:17,668 LET'S GO TO THE RESERVOIR. 456 00:22:17,836 --> 00:22:19,003 MOVIES IT IS. 457 00:22:19,171 --> 00:22:20,838 YES, YES. 458 00:22:21,006 --> 00:22:23,174 I KINDA FEEL LIKE GOING TO THE RESERVOIR. 459 00:22:23,342 --> 00:22:26,135 RESERVOIR IT IS. YES, YES. 460 00:22:26,303 --> 00:22:28,179 CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY CARSEY-WERNER PRODUCTIONS AND FOX BROADCASTING COMPANY 461 00:22:28,347 --> 00:22:30,827 CAPTIONING PERFORMED BY THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE, INC.