1
00:00:57,792 --> 00:01:00,922
[Carrie] In a city where
cynicism is as prevalent
as pashmina,
2
00:01:01,000 --> 00:01:02,500
there is nothing more hopeful
3
00:01:02,583 --> 00:01:05,543
than the "getting ready
for the first date" routine.
4
00:01:05,625 --> 00:01:07,375
His name was Will O'Connor.
5
00:01:07,458 --> 00:01:09,878
He was a smart, cute,
urban planner
6
00:01:09,959 --> 00:01:11,379
Miranda had met at Starbucks
7
00:01:11,458 --> 00:01:14,378
when he had mistaken her latte
for his double caff
8
00:01:14,458 --> 00:01:15,788
and had offered to make it up
to her
9
00:01:15,875 --> 00:01:18,075
by buying her
a real drink that Saturday.
10
00:01:18,166 --> 00:01:21,536
Samantha preferred the
"saying goodnight
to the first date" routine.
11
00:01:21,625 --> 00:01:23,625
His name was Sebastian Wyse.
12
00:01:23,709 --> 00:01:26,249
For Sam,
it was a very good night.
13
00:01:26,333 --> 00:01:27,793
Meanwhile, uptown,
14
00:01:27,875 --> 00:01:30,705
Trey and Charlotte were
practicing their new routine.
15
00:01:30,792 --> 00:01:32,082
Alrighty.
16
00:01:32,166 --> 00:01:33,576
The schooner's got the sails up.
17
00:01:33,667 --> 00:01:35,327
Yes, I can feel it.
18
00:01:36,166 --> 00:01:37,496
Alrighty.
19
00:01:37,583 --> 00:01:39,083
I'm bringing it into the harbor.
20
00:01:39,166 --> 00:01:40,826
-Bring it in.
-Okay.
21
00:01:42,667 --> 00:01:45,457
All right, here I come.
22
00:01:47,500 --> 00:01:49,170
Here I come.
23
00:01:52,750 --> 00:01:54,290
Honey?
24
00:01:56,500 --> 00:01:58,000
The wind died.
25
00:01:58,583 --> 00:01:59,543
I'm sorry.
26
00:02:03,333 --> 00:02:05,583
[Carrie] After a week
of the same routine,
27
00:02:05,667 --> 00:02:07,667
the only thing getting up
in their bed
28
00:02:07,750 --> 00:02:09,080
was Charlotte's libido.
29
00:02:10,208 --> 00:02:11,288
As for me,
30
00:02:11,375 --> 00:02:13,625
my routine
had become very routine.
31
00:02:13,709 --> 00:02:16,669
I was spending almost
every night in, working.
32
00:02:16,750 --> 00:02:18,500
[telephone rings]
33
00:02:19,125 --> 00:02:20,125
Hello?
34
00:02:20,208 --> 00:02:22,748
Okay, my date
is three hours late.
35
00:02:22,834 --> 00:02:24,634
I'm being stood up, right?
36
00:02:24,709 --> 00:02:26,079
[Carrie] Maybe he got lost.
37
00:02:26,166 --> 00:02:27,076
Carrie!
38
00:02:27,166 --> 00:02:29,126
Well, it doesn't look good.
39
00:02:29,208 --> 00:02:31,418
Oh, and I'm wearing
a new dress from Barney's,
40
00:02:31,500 --> 00:02:33,080
and I'm eating out of plastic.
41
00:02:33,166 --> 00:02:35,076
Oh, man, I'm sorry.
42
00:02:35,166 --> 00:02:36,456
[Miranda]
He doesn't even know me!
43
00:02:36,542 --> 00:02:38,462
The least he could do
is wait to get to know me
44
00:02:38,542 --> 00:02:39,632
before he rejects me.
45
00:02:39,709 --> 00:02:41,789
Yeah, that's illegal dumping.
46
00:02:41,875 --> 00:02:43,575
[Miranda] It's crazy.
47
00:02:43,667 --> 00:02:45,577
This hasn't happened
to me since I'm 27.
48
00:02:45,667 --> 00:02:48,077
I'm older. I should know better.
49
00:02:48,166 --> 00:02:51,036
I thought I got
a little smarter about
picking 'em now, you know?
50
00:02:51,125 --> 00:02:53,535
I can't believe
guys still stand girls up.
51
00:02:53,625 --> 00:02:56,205
I can't believe
I'm eating a frozen dinner.
52
00:02:56,291 --> 00:02:57,831
I'm such a cliché.
53
00:02:57,917 --> 00:02:59,627
You wanna grab
a drink or something?
54
00:02:59,709 --> 00:03:01,379
No, I can't. I have to work.
55
00:03:01,458 --> 00:03:04,828
I agreed to teach these stupid
Learning Annex classes.
56
00:03:04,917 --> 00:03:07,287
They're calling it
"Bright Lights, Date City."
57
00:03:07,375 --> 00:03:09,955
Ugh!
I'm so embarrassed for you.
58
00:03:10,041 --> 00:03:11,921
Hey, they're paying me
300 bucks a pop.
59
00:03:12,166 --> 00:03:13,876
It's a seminar
on where to meet men.
60
00:03:13,959 --> 00:03:15,749
Apparently, I'm an expert.
61
00:03:15,834 --> 00:03:17,924
Tell them to steer clear
of Starbucks.
62
00:03:18,333 --> 00:03:20,003
Who would pay
for something like this?
63
00:03:20,083 --> 00:03:22,213
Now? Maybe me.
64
00:03:23,041 --> 00:03:25,711
[sighs] Okay, gotta go.
65
00:03:26,000 --> 00:03:28,330
This dress is making
a mockery of me.
66
00:03:28,417 --> 00:03:30,037
I'm sorry, sweetie. Bye.
67
00:03:30,125 --> 00:03:32,745
Please. Bye.
68
00:03:32,834 --> 00:03:35,714
[Carrie] Stood up at 27,
Miranda had done nothing.
69
00:03:35,792 --> 00:03:37,212
At 34?
70
00:03:37,291 --> 00:03:39,921
She decided she wasn't going
to take this stand-up
71
00:03:40,000 --> 00:03:41,330
lying down.
72
00:03:41,417 --> 00:03:43,707
Will may have given her
the cold shoulder,
73
00:03:43,792 --> 00:03:46,582
but he had also given her
his home number.
74
00:03:46,667 --> 00:03:47,577
[woman] Hello?
75
00:03:47,667 --> 00:03:49,327
Hi. Is Will there?
76
00:03:49,417 --> 00:03:50,787
[woman] Who's speaking, please?
77
00:03:50,875 --> 00:03:52,035
Miranda Hobbes.
78
00:03:52,125 --> 00:03:54,705
[woman] Miranda,
this is Will's mother.
79
00:03:54,792 --> 00:03:56,462
Well, Will's mother.
80
00:03:56,667 --> 00:03:58,577
I don't know how
you raised your son,
81
00:03:58,667 --> 00:04:01,207
but he just stood me up
for a date.
82
00:04:01,291 --> 00:04:03,131
[woman] Will died today.
83
00:04:06,166 --> 00:04:08,456
-They're starting to die on us.
-Oh, my God.
84
00:04:08,542 --> 00:04:10,172
Well, at least
you weren't stood up.
85
00:04:10,250 --> 00:04:11,670
Thirty-five and they're dying.
86
00:04:11,750 --> 00:04:12,880
We should just give up now.
87
00:04:12,959 --> 00:04:14,209
Well, on the bright side,
88
00:04:14,291 --> 00:04:16,081
this could explain
why they don't call back.
89
00:04:16,166 --> 00:04:17,036
How did he--
90
00:04:17,125 --> 00:04:19,165
Heart attack, at the gym.
91
00:04:19,250 --> 00:04:20,670
See, this is why
I don't work out.
92
00:04:20,750 --> 00:04:22,830
You want to hear the worst part?
I felt so bad,
93
00:04:22,917 --> 00:04:25,037
I told his mother
I would go to the wake.
94
00:04:25,125 --> 00:04:26,325
You don't even know him!
95
00:04:26,417 --> 00:04:28,667
And it's safe to say
she never will.
96
00:04:28,750 --> 00:04:30,830
Well, I, for one,
am far from being dead.
97
00:04:31,166 --> 00:04:34,246
I just got us reservations
at Samba next week.
98
00:04:34,333 --> 00:04:36,043
Ooh, fancy.
99
00:04:36,125 --> 00:04:37,455
But I could only
get us a four-top.
100
00:04:37,542 --> 00:04:39,712
Do you think Trey
would mind staying home?
101
00:04:40,000 --> 00:04:41,040
No.
102
00:04:41,125 --> 00:04:43,035
He doesn't seem up
for much these days.
103
00:04:43,792 --> 00:04:45,292
[sighs]
104
00:04:47,333 --> 00:04:49,633
Charlotte, is everything okay?
105
00:04:51,000 --> 00:04:52,500
[deep sigh]
106
00:04:53,333 --> 00:04:55,463
We've been trying,
you know, to--
107
00:04:55,542 --> 00:04:56,792
Fuck?
108
00:04:56,875 --> 00:04:58,125
[Charlotte] Whatever.
109
00:04:58,208 --> 00:04:59,958
And it's just not--
110
00:05:00,041 --> 00:05:01,251
Getting big and hard?
111
00:05:01,333 --> 00:05:03,043
What is this, dirty Mad Libs?
112
00:05:03,125 --> 00:05:06,995
I love him, and he's trying,
but this is so frustrating.
113
00:05:07,083 --> 00:05:09,383
-Of course it is.
-I mean, last night,
114
00:05:09,625 --> 00:05:12,035
I got so turned on I almost--
115
00:05:12,375 --> 00:05:13,245
Hey!
116
00:05:13,333 --> 00:05:14,543
You almost masturbated,
117
00:05:14,625 --> 00:05:15,575
he almost got it up,
118
00:05:15,667 --> 00:05:17,497
together you almost had sex.
119
00:05:18,041 --> 00:05:21,131
Right next to my husband.
I feel so ashamed.
120
00:05:21,208 --> 00:05:22,628
Everybody masturbates.
121
00:05:22,709 --> 00:05:24,209
I did it this morning.
122
00:05:24,291 --> 00:05:25,711
That explains why
I got your voicemail.
123
00:05:25,792 --> 00:05:27,542
He masturbates
and he reads porn.
124
00:05:27,625 --> 00:05:29,625
But when it comes
to dealing with me...
125
00:05:29,709 --> 00:05:30,629
nothing.
126
00:05:30,709 --> 00:05:31,629
Madonna-whore.
127
00:05:31,709 --> 00:05:33,709
-You think?
-Absolutely.
128
00:05:33,792 --> 00:05:35,712
Trey sees you
as his virginal wife,
129
00:05:35,792 --> 00:05:37,252
not his sexual plaything.
130
00:05:37,333 --> 00:05:38,833
You're not going to get anywhere
131
00:05:38,917 --> 00:05:41,457
until you change
how he sees you.
132
00:05:41,542 --> 00:05:42,832
I don't know if I can do that.
133
00:05:42,917 --> 00:05:44,377
Yes, you can. Come on!
134
00:05:44,458 --> 00:05:46,998
You're sexy.
He should see you.
135
00:05:47,083 --> 00:05:48,503
You're something to see.
136
00:05:48,583 --> 00:05:50,423
Oh, yeah.
137
00:05:50,917 --> 00:05:52,167
[growling playfully]
138
00:05:52,250 --> 00:05:54,670
[Carrie] The next night,
I realized firsthand
139
00:05:54,750 --> 00:05:56,500
just how many desperate
New York women
140
00:05:56,583 --> 00:05:57,963
there actually were out there.
141
00:05:58,834 --> 00:05:59,884
Wow.
142
00:06:00,250 --> 00:06:01,580
Hi.
143
00:06:04,041 --> 00:06:06,001
-Hello.
-[women] Hi.
144
00:06:06,083 --> 00:06:08,333
Gosh, I'm flattered
that so many of you ladies
145
00:06:08,417 --> 00:06:09,917
showed up to hear me talk.
146
00:06:10,250 --> 00:06:12,830
Well, the fact is,
147
00:06:13,083 --> 00:06:16,883
I have had a lot
of experience with men.
148
00:06:16,959 --> 00:06:19,039
Some of it good, some of it bad,
149
00:06:19,125 --> 00:06:20,625
and some of it very, very ugly.
150
00:06:20,709 --> 00:06:22,079
-[women laugh]
-Wow.
151
00:06:22,166 --> 00:06:27,206
Well, there are two million
single men in the city.
152
00:06:27,583 --> 00:06:29,463
I have dated about
a million of them.
153
00:06:31,125 --> 00:06:34,285
And all of these men
are right outside your door.
154
00:06:34,375 --> 00:06:36,705
So the next time
you step out in the morning
155
00:06:36,792 --> 00:06:38,172
with your shoes, and your tote,
156
00:06:38,250 --> 00:06:40,460
and your traveling cappuccino,
157
00:06:40,542 --> 00:06:42,582
take a look around,
because I'm telling you,
158
00:06:42,792 --> 00:06:45,582
our little metropolis,
it is stacked with men.
159
00:06:45,667 --> 00:06:47,537
You never know who
you're gonna run into.
160
00:06:47,625 --> 00:06:49,825
You can turn a corner and boom!
161
00:06:49,917 --> 00:06:52,247
"Bright lights, date city."
[laughs]
162
00:06:56,417 --> 00:06:58,077
Could you be more specific?
163
00:06:58,166 --> 00:07:01,666
Um, you mean, like,
places to meet men?
164
00:07:02,250 --> 00:07:05,250
Sure, um, well, let's see...
165
00:07:05,333 --> 00:07:07,213
Uh... Samba.
166
00:07:07,750 --> 00:07:10,080
Um, really, any sporting--
167
00:07:10,166 --> 00:07:11,416
Sports bars.
Mickey Mantle's.
168
00:07:11,500 --> 00:07:12,580
Oh, I've gone there.
169
00:07:12,667 --> 00:07:14,577
All the men were married.
170
00:07:14,667 --> 00:07:16,377
Oh, really? Hmm.
171
00:07:16,458 --> 00:07:19,628
Okay, well, uh, let's see.
172
00:07:20,583 --> 00:07:23,333
Well, I once met this fella
on the Hampton Jitney.
173
00:07:23,834 --> 00:07:25,504
Of course, it turned out
that he couldn't drive,
174
00:07:25,583 --> 00:07:28,543
and he was on some sort
of parole program.
175
00:07:28,625 --> 00:07:30,325
So I guess that's a bad example.
176
00:07:30,417 --> 00:07:33,167
Suddenly, I felt like
the bad example.
177
00:07:34,000 --> 00:07:35,580
Yes, you.
178
00:07:35,667 --> 00:07:37,287
Are you married?
179
00:07:37,375 --> 00:07:38,665
Uh, no.
180
00:07:39,709 --> 00:07:41,079
Yes?
You, right there.
181
00:07:41,166 --> 00:07:42,706
Have you ever been married?
182
00:07:42,792 --> 00:07:45,212
Uh, no.
Not that I'm aware of, no.
183
00:07:45,291 --> 00:07:47,171
Yes, you all the way
in the back there, yes.
184
00:07:47,250 --> 00:07:48,500
How old are you?
185
00:07:48,583 --> 00:07:49,923
[laughs]
186
00:07:50,125 --> 00:07:53,455
Look, I'm really
not an expert on men, okay?
187
00:07:53,542 --> 00:07:55,172
I just write about this stuff.
188
00:07:55,250 --> 00:07:58,880
Then why are we paying
to hear you talk about it?
189
00:07:59,125 --> 00:08:00,915
[crowd rumbling]
190
00:08:01,000 --> 00:08:03,000
Hey, hey, come on. Be quiet!
191
00:08:03,083 --> 00:08:06,833
She's older than us.
We can learn something!
192
00:08:06,917 --> 00:08:09,577
[Carrie] The only thing
I had learned that night
at The Learning Annex
193
00:08:09,667 --> 00:08:12,037
was that maybe
I should have stayed home.
194
00:08:13,375 --> 00:08:14,995
Can I smoke in here?
Is that all right?
195
00:08:15,083 --> 00:08:16,213
[women] No!
196
00:08:16,291 --> 00:08:17,251
[Carrie] If you stay single
197
00:08:17,333 --> 00:08:18,633
in New York long enough,
198
00:08:18,709 --> 00:08:20,669
you're supposed
to get wiser about dating.
199
00:08:20,750 --> 00:08:23,040
What men to pick.
Where to meet them...
200
00:08:23,125 --> 00:08:25,915
But what really
made any of us experts?
201
00:08:26,000 --> 00:08:27,830
Wasn't our single status
a neon sign
202
00:08:27,917 --> 00:08:29,457
that we couldn't get it right?
203
00:08:29,542 --> 00:08:31,042
What if all these years
in New York
204
00:08:31,125 --> 00:08:35,665
have only made us older,
more confused, or dead?
205
00:08:35,750 --> 00:08:38,500
Are we getting wiser,
or just older?
206
00:08:39,083 --> 00:08:40,883
I swear to God, if they'd been
holding tomatoes
207
00:08:40,959 --> 00:08:43,329
instead of Louis Vuitton
clutches, I'd be a dead woman.
208
00:08:43,417 --> 00:08:44,827
Or at least gazpacho.
209
00:08:44,917 --> 00:08:48,287
Do you know that there are
no available men out there?
210
00:08:48,959 --> 00:08:51,329
We're at my date's wake,
so, yes.
211
00:08:51,417 --> 00:08:53,787
Gosh, they were so hostile.
212
00:08:54,125 --> 00:08:55,955
-Fuck 'em.
-Well, maybe they're right.
213
00:08:56,041 --> 00:08:57,081
I mean,
what do I know about men?
214
00:08:57,166 --> 00:08:58,126
All I have
215
00:08:58,208 --> 00:08:59,748
is a bunch
of failed relationships.
216
00:09:00,083 --> 00:09:01,423
And one affair.
217
00:09:01,500 --> 00:09:02,460
Thanks.
218
00:09:02,917 --> 00:09:05,457
As if being dead-person adjacent
isn't bad enough.
219
00:09:06,000 --> 00:09:08,040
I'm supposed to teach
another one of these classes
next week.
220
00:09:08,125 --> 00:09:09,375
What am I gonna do?
221
00:09:09,458 --> 00:09:10,958
Hire a bodyguard.
222
00:09:12,417 --> 00:09:14,247
This is my first wake.
223
00:09:14,333 --> 00:09:16,133
Don't expect a goodie bag.
224
00:09:17,125 --> 00:09:17,915
[gasps]
225
00:09:18,000 --> 00:09:19,000
Oh, my God.
226
00:09:19,083 --> 00:09:20,633
Open casket.
No, no, no, no, no.
227
00:09:20,709 --> 00:09:22,499
I've never seen
a dead body before.
Let's get out of here.
228
00:09:22,583 --> 00:09:24,463
We can't,
people are looking at us.
229
00:09:35,625 --> 00:09:39,955
[gasps] Oh, wow, he's cute.
230
00:09:40,458 --> 00:09:41,458
Was.
231
00:09:43,458 --> 00:09:44,498
Damn.
232
00:09:50,291 --> 00:09:51,671
See, this would've helped me.
233
00:09:51,750 --> 00:09:54,000
"Place to meet men:
an after-wake party."
234
00:09:54,083 --> 00:09:56,253
He had money set aside for this.
235
00:09:56,333 --> 00:09:57,423
It's nice.
236
00:09:57,500 --> 00:09:59,210
"I'm dead, you're not,
enjoy the buffet."
237
00:09:59,291 --> 00:10:00,831
Damnit, I like him
even more now.
238
00:10:00,917 --> 00:10:02,707
He was organized enough
to have a will.
239
00:10:02,792 --> 00:10:04,542
And some very
attractive friends.
240
00:10:04,625 --> 00:10:06,575
This place is lousy with men.
241
00:10:06,667 --> 00:10:08,167
[Miranda] Look how freaked out
they all look.
242
00:10:08,250 --> 00:10:10,080
[Carrie] That's 'cause they know
any minute... boom!
243
00:10:10,166 --> 00:10:11,376
They're outta here.
244
00:10:11,834 --> 00:10:12,834
[man] Carrie?
245
00:10:13,250 --> 00:10:16,000
Hey, it's me, Jim.
246
00:10:17,208 --> 00:10:20,628
Oh, my God! Hey, Jim.
247
00:10:20,709 --> 00:10:22,579
Hey, your hair--
248
00:10:22,667 --> 00:10:25,497
Yeah, I know.
I cut it for a real job.
249
00:10:25,583 --> 00:10:26,833
I'm an engineer now.
250
00:10:26,917 --> 00:10:28,497
-On the railroad?
-Civil.
251
00:10:28,583 --> 00:10:30,793
Oh. [laughs]
What happened to the band?
252
00:10:30,875 --> 00:10:32,825
Turns out,
I really wasn't talented.
253
00:10:32,917 --> 00:10:35,287
Oh, wow.
Oh, Miranda,
254
00:10:35,375 --> 00:10:37,625
sorry, this is Jim.
255
00:10:37,709 --> 00:10:40,829
We dated like
a grillion years ago.
256
00:10:40,917 --> 00:10:43,577
-Or eight.
-Miranda. Nice to meet you.
257
00:10:44,041 --> 00:10:45,631
I'd ask if you two
are having fun,
258
00:10:45,709 --> 00:10:47,459
but that seems
totally inappropriate.
259
00:10:47,542 --> 00:10:49,712
It is, and we are, thanks.
260
00:10:50,125 --> 00:10:51,825
So you were friends with Will?
261
00:10:51,917 --> 00:10:52,787
May he rest.
262
00:10:52,875 --> 00:10:54,245
[Jim] Roommates in college.
263
00:10:54,333 --> 00:10:56,133
It was weird, we were friends,
264
00:10:56,208 --> 00:10:57,668
but we were really competitive.
265
00:10:57,750 --> 00:10:59,790
We were always fighting it out
for everything.
266
00:10:59,875 --> 00:11:01,625
I mean, look,
he even died first,
267
00:11:01,709 --> 00:11:03,789
just to beat me to the punch.
268
00:11:03,875 --> 00:11:05,455
[laughs] Bad.
269
00:11:05,542 --> 00:11:06,672
But you laughed.
270
00:11:06,750 --> 00:11:08,960
Well, you guys were
the classic "frenemies."
271
00:11:09,041 --> 00:11:10,461
"Frenemies." Nice word.
272
00:11:10,542 --> 00:11:12,332
Well, I'm a full-time
writer now.
273
00:11:12,417 --> 00:11:13,997
-I know.
-I'm a lawyer.
274
00:11:14,083 --> 00:11:15,173
And I'm not drunk enough.
275
00:11:15,250 --> 00:11:16,670
Can I get you ladies anything?
276
00:11:16,750 --> 00:11:17,880
Oh, a martini.
277
00:11:17,959 --> 00:11:18,829
No.
278
00:11:18,917 --> 00:11:20,827
Don't go anywhere. I'll be back.
279
00:11:20,917 --> 00:11:22,537
He's kinda cute.
280
00:11:24,792 --> 00:11:26,422
He's kind of an asshole.
281
00:11:26,500 --> 00:11:28,920
-Really?
-Oh, yes, indeedy.
282
00:11:29,417 --> 00:11:30,417
But he seems great.
283
00:11:30,500 --> 00:11:31,500
Sure,
that's what I thought too
284
00:11:31,583 --> 00:11:32,753
when I started dating him.
285
00:11:32,834 --> 00:11:34,214
Then, when we both knew
it wasn't working,
286
00:11:34,291 --> 00:11:35,501
and I broke up with him,
287
00:11:35,583 --> 00:11:36,923
hello, asshole.
288
00:11:37,000 --> 00:11:40,960
You know, snide comments,
rumors spreading, the works.
289
00:11:41,041 --> 00:11:42,421
But he's so cute.
290
00:11:42,500 --> 00:11:43,580
Hmm.
291
00:11:44,250 --> 00:11:46,040
-Incoming.
-Outgoing.
292
00:11:47,125 --> 00:11:48,955
-Here you go, Miranda.
-Thanks.
293
00:11:49,333 --> 00:11:51,883
I would love to stay
and chat inappropriately,
294
00:11:51,959 --> 00:11:54,289
but I'm due to give a toast
in the other room.
295
00:11:54,375 --> 00:11:55,995
So this is kind of
a working wake for you.
296
00:11:56,083 --> 00:12:00,383
[chuckles] Listen,
I'd love to get together
with you sometime.
297
00:12:00,458 --> 00:12:03,208
Oh, here's my card.
298
00:12:03,291 --> 00:12:07,041
My e-mail address is
on the back, and my cell.
299
00:12:07,125 --> 00:12:09,535
[Carrie] Apparently, Will's
death had turned Miranda
300
00:12:09,625 --> 00:12:13,035
into my target audience:
a desperate woman.
301
00:12:13,125 --> 00:12:16,125
Downtown, Samantha
was getting wise...
302
00:12:16,208 --> 00:12:18,538
Sebastian Wyse, again.
303
00:12:18,625 --> 00:12:19,745
[Samantha moans]
304
00:12:19,834 --> 00:12:21,004
While uptown,
305
00:12:21,083 --> 00:12:23,043
Charlotte was
getting nothing at all.
306
00:12:23,125 --> 00:12:24,165
[sighs]
307
00:12:24,250 --> 00:12:27,040
I'm telling you,
we almost broke the bed.
308
00:12:27,125 --> 00:12:28,205
You can't break a bed.
309
00:12:28,291 --> 00:12:29,961
What does this stallion
do for a living?
310
00:12:30,041 --> 00:12:31,461
-I'm not sure.
-Huh.
311
00:12:31,542 --> 00:12:33,752
Hey, does he go
to Mickey Mantle's?
312
00:12:33,834 --> 00:12:34,884
You got me.
313
00:12:35,333 --> 00:12:37,043
How can you not
know anything about him?
314
00:12:37,125 --> 00:12:37,955
You slept with him.
315
00:12:38,041 --> 00:12:39,211
I fucked him.
316
00:12:39,291 --> 00:12:40,831
He made me come six times.
317
00:12:40,917 --> 00:12:42,957
That's good enough for me.
318
00:12:43,041 --> 00:12:44,171
Stop it!
319
00:12:45,709 --> 00:12:48,249
Why do you always have
to talk about sex like that?
320
00:12:48,333 --> 00:12:50,083
Because I can.
321
00:12:50,166 --> 00:12:51,246
Okay, girls, simmer down.
322
00:12:51,333 --> 00:12:52,753
Mommy hasn't
had her caffeine yet.
323
00:12:52,834 --> 00:12:54,924
I-- I can't take this anymore.
324
00:12:55,000 --> 00:12:56,460
Oh, hey, frittatas.
325
00:12:57,500 --> 00:12:59,420
Sex is something special
326
00:12:59,500 --> 00:13:02,580
that's supposed to happen
between two people
who love each other.
327
00:13:02,667 --> 00:13:03,827
Or two people who love sex.
328
00:13:03,917 --> 00:13:05,167
Oh, my God, you're such a--
329
00:13:05,250 --> 00:13:07,580
A what? What am I, Charlotte?
330
00:13:07,667 --> 00:13:09,917
When are you gonna learn
that you can't just sleep
331
00:13:10,000 --> 00:13:11,670
with everything
that comes along?
332
00:13:11,750 --> 00:13:14,670
Hey, Mrs. Softee,
at least I'm getting laid!
333
00:13:15,291 --> 00:13:17,331
And you can forget Samba!
334
00:13:18,542 --> 00:13:20,212
That girl needs
the stick out of her ass
335
00:13:20,291 --> 00:13:22,381
and a dick
in her coochie, pronto.
336
00:13:22,458 --> 00:13:24,288
-Am I right?
-Not gettin' involved.
337
00:13:24,375 --> 00:13:25,665
I'm with her.
338
00:13:25,750 --> 00:13:29,080
You know what?
I don't need this.
339
00:13:29,667 --> 00:13:32,377
Maybe you guys
should forget Samba too.
340
00:13:36,000 --> 00:13:37,830
We knew this was coming.
341
00:13:37,917 --> 00:13:40,537
But it's so sad and petty.
342
00:13:40,875 --> 00:13:42,495
I'm staying way out of this one.
343
00:13:42,583 --> 00:13:45,043
Way out. New Jersey out.
344
00:13:46,375 --> 00:13:48,325
Okay, speaking of petty,
345
00:13:48,417 --> 00:13:50,877
how upset would you be
if I went out with Jim?
346
00:13:52,000 --> 00:13:54,290
Jim-old boyfriend-Jim?
347
00:13:54,375 --> 00:13:55,495
He called me.
348
00:13:55,583 --> 00:13:57,583
Oh, Miranda, no.
349
00:13:57,667 --> 00:14:00,627
Honey, he so needs
to be voted off the island.
350
00:14:00,875 --> 00:14:02,035
I know how you feel,
351
00:14:02,125 --> 00:14:05,035
but he was so sweet
on the phone, and...
352
00:14:05,291 --> 00:14:08,171
it was eight years ago, Carrie.
Maybe he's learned something.
353
00:14:08,250 --> 00:14:10,000
I mean, haven't you learned
anything in eight years?
354
00:14:10,083 --> 00:14:11,633
Apparently not.
355
00:14:12,166 --> 00:14:13,916
He's alive and he asked me out.
356
00:14:14,583 --> 00:14:16,213
I'm a little fragile right now.
357
00:14:16,291 --> 00:14:18,461
All right, fine, go. Go.
358
00:14:18,542 --> 00:14:19,712
And you know what they say,
359
00:14:19,792 --> 00:14:21,172
one woman's asshole
is another woman's--
360
00:14:21,250 --> 00:14:22,210
A-hole.
361
00:14:22,500 --> 00:14:24,420
Well, as long as
you're okay with it.
362
00:14:25,917 --> 00:14:27,997
[Carrie] Later that week,
Charlotte decided
363
00:14:28,083 --> 00:14:29,333
if she was
ever gonna get Trey
364
00:14:29,417 --> 00:14:31,037
to see the sexual part of her,
365
00:14:31,125 --> 00:14:32,575
she'd have to dress the part.
366
00:14:32,667 --> 00:14:35,037
I'm going to get him
to notice me, Carrie.
I have to.
367
00:14:35,542 --> 00:14:36,792
I think that's a bottom.
368
00:14:36,875 --> 00:14:38,205
Oh.
369
00:14:38,291 --> 00:14:40,131
You know, if you're gonna
go the lingerie route,
370
00:14:40,208 --> 00:14:42,828
why not go La Perla,
or something a little more...
371
00:14:42,917 --> 00:14:45,377
upscale and a little less
flammable?
372
00:14:45,458 --> 00:14:47,538
I don't want to be me!
I want to be someone else!
373
00:14:47,625 --> 00:14:49,665
Well, that's the basis
for a healthy relationship.
374
00:14:49,750 --> 00:14:51,540
What about these?
What do these say?
375
00:14:51,625 --> 00:14:53,785
Um, "read my lips"?
376
00:14:54,208 --> 00:14:57,538
I want to be
"call girl meets Park Avenue."
377
00:14:57,625 --> 00:15:00,665
Then you're gonna have
to pair that with a nice,
little cardigan.
378
00:15:00,750 --> 00:15:02,880
Oh, this is important
to me, Carrie.
379
00:15:02,959 --> 00:15:04,379
I need him to see me sexually.
380
00:15:04,458 --> 00:15:07,288
I know you do, sweetie,
I'm just not sure I need to.
381
00:15:07,834 --> 00:15:11,134
You know, this is much more
a Samantha job.
382
00:15:11,208 --> 00:15:13,828
Oh, please.
I need a break from her.
383
00:15:13,917 --> 00:15:15,877
You shouldn't be so hard on her.
384
00:15:15,959 --> 00:15:17,749
She doesn't mean to be hurtful.
385
00:15:18,500 --> 00:15:19,540
Well, she was.
386
00:15:19,625 --> 00:15:21,125
Well, I believe there were
two of you
387
00:15:21,208 --> 00:15:22,418
ruining my breakfast.
388
00:15:22,500 --> 00:15:23,540
You know what?
389
00:15:23,792 --> 00:15:25,332
I have enough problems
in my life right now.
390
00:15:25,417 --> 00:15:27,287
I really don't
need any lectures.
391
00:15:29,667 --> 00:15:31,577
[Carrie] It was my second
lecture that week
392
00:15:31,667 --> 00:15:33,127
that was a failure.
393
00:15:33,208 --> 00:15:34,418
And across town,
394
00:15:34,500 --> 00:15:36,330
Samantha decided
the wise thing to do
395
00:15:36,417 --> 00:15:39,377
was to take a break
from all of us and go shopping.
396
00:15:42,333 --> 00:15:44,043
Oh, I'm sorry.
397
00:15:44,125 --> 00:15:46,205
Let it go and no one gets hurt.
398
00:15:46,291 --> 00:15:48,581
I think I was holding it first.
399
00:15:48,667 --> 00:15:50,537
I know Tae Kwon Do.
400
00:15:50,625 --> 00:15:51,995
I know the manager.
401
00:15:52,083 --> 00:15:55,333
[laughs]
402
00:15:55,417 --> 00:15:58,537
You're spunky.
I like spunky women.
403
00:15:58,625 --> 00:16:00,495
We're a dying breed.
404
00:16:00,583 --> 00:16:01,673
No kidding.
405
00:16:02,041 --> 00:16:03,291
I'm Claire Anne.
406
00:16:03,375 --> 00:16:05,625
Don't let the southern accent
fool you.
407
00:16:05,709 --> 00:16:07,129
I'm Samantha.
408
00:16:07,208 --> 00:16:08,628
Nothing fools me.
409
00:16:08,709 --> 00:16:09,959
[laughs]
410
00:16:10,041 --> 00:16:12,791
I'll tell you what,
I'll let you have the scarf
411
00:16:12,875 --> 00:16:15,455
if you show me where a gal
can get a hard drink
412
00:16:15,542 --> 00:16:17,672
in a dark bar around here.
413
00:16:17,750 --> 00:16:19,880
Done and done.
414
00:16:20,542 --> 00:16:22,082
Well, my last date died,
415
00:16:22,166 --> 00:16:23,786
so the fact that
you're still breathing
416
00:16:23,875 --> 00:16:25,455
makes this a huge success.
417
00:16:25,542 --> 00:16:27,882
Low standards. I like that.
418
00:16:35,041 --> 00:16:36,211
This was really nice.
419
00:16:36,291 --> 00:16:37,881
Yeah, it was.
420
00:16:38,291 --> 00:16:40,961
You know, Carrie wasn't sure
that we would get along.
421
00:16:41,166 --> 00:16:42,826
She knew me a long time ago.
422
00:16:42,917 --> 00:16:44,327
I've changed.
423
00:16:44,417 --> 00:16:48,497
I mean, back then I was
in a band called
Uncle Ted's Ass,
424
00:16:48,583 --> 00:16:50,833
-[laughs]
-and I could sit on my hair.
425
00:16:50,917 --> 00:16:52,537
Wow, that's impressive.
426
00:16:52,625 --> 00:16:54,955
You didn't hear us play.
[laughs]
427
00:17:03,166 --> 00:17:04,496
I'd like to see you again.
428
00:17:04,583 --> 00:17:06,253
I'd like that.
429
00:17:07,083 --> 00:17:09,793
Goodnight.
430
00:17:13,083 --> 00:17:14,793
[Carrie] The next morning,
Miranda called
431
00:17:14,875 --> 00:17:17,375
with the postmortem
on her last date with Jim.
432
00:17:17,458 --> 00:17:18,708
[telephone rings]
433
00:17:20,333 --> 00:17:21,173
Hello?
434
00:17:21,250 --> 00:17:22,540
Hey, it's me.
435
00:17:22,625 --> 00:17:24,625
Oh, thank God.
I thought it was
The Learning Annex
436
00:17:24,709 --> 00:17:26,379
bugging me about my next class.
437
00:17:26,458 --> 00:17:27,378
When's that?
438
00:17:27,458 --> 00:17:28,878
The 12th of never gonna happen.
439
00:17:28,959 --> 00:17:30,879
Do you know,
people actually asked
for refunds
440
00:17:30,959 --> 00:17:32,079
after my first class?
441
00:17:32,166 --> 00:17:33,536
What do they know?
442
00:17:33,625 --> 00:17:34,955
[Carrie] Apparently,
more than I do.
443
00:17:35,041 --> 00:17:37,211
I feel like a total sham.
444
00:17:37,291 --> 00:17:38,461
Oh, easy.
445
00:17:38,542 --> 00:17:40,212
That's my friend
you're talking about there.
446
00:17:40,291 --> 00:17:41,291
Hmm.
447
00:17:42,667 --> 00:17:44,827
So, I went out with Jim.
448
00:17:44,917 --> 00:17:46,997
Don't make me say I told you so.
449
00:17:47,083 --> 00:17:48,383
Carrie, it was great.
450
00:17:48,458 --> 00:17:50,328
It was fun and romantic.
451
00:17:50,417 --> 00:17:51,997
We talked so long,
we closed the restaurant.
452
00:17:52,083 --> 00:17:53,173
I think you're wrong about him.
453
00:17:53,250 --> 00:17:54,290
I think this could be good.
454
00:17:54,375 --> 00:17:55,785
Are we talking
about the same Jim?
455
00:17:55,875 --> 00:17:57,205
Jim, asshole Jim?
456
00:17:57,291 --> 00:17:58,631
He's not an asshole.
457
00:17:58,709 --> 00:18:00,249
Yeah, not till
you break up with him.
458
00:18:00,333 --> 00:18:02,753
Come on, he says
the greatest things about you.
459
00:18:02,834 --> 00:18:03,924
He does?
460
00:18:04,000 --> 00:18:05,960
I'm going out
with him again on Friday.
461
00:18:06,041 --> 00:18:07,331
Go. Godspeed.
462
00:18:07,417 --> 00:18:08,377
Carrie...
463
00:18:09,000 --> 00:18:11,960
I feel weird dating a guy
that you don't like.
464
00:18:12,041 --> 00:18:13,631
We should all go out.
465
00:18:13,709 --> 00:18:16,289
Have a drink sometime.
One drink.
466
00:18:16,375 --> 00:18:18,285
Question, what do you
know about this guy?
467
00:18:18,375 --> 00:18:19,915
You've been
on one date with him.
468
00:18:20,000 --> 00:18:22,130
What do you know about him?
It's been eight years.
469
00:18:22,333 --> 00:18:23,583
Think about the drink.
470
00:18:23,667 --> 00:18:25,417
[Carrie] Uptown,
Charlotte decided
471
00:18:25,500 --> 00:18:26,790
this would be a good time
472
00:18:26,875 --> 00:18:28,915
to spend
with her real, old friends,
473
00:18:29,000 --> 00:18:30,790
the sisters
of Kappa Kappa Gamma.
474
00:18:30,875 --> 00:18:33,785
Oh, my goodness,
has it been forever, or what?
475
00:18:33,875 --> 00:18:34,955
It has.
476
00:18:35,041 --> 00:18:36,251
[Meg] It is so great to see you,
Charlotte.
477
00:18:36,333 --> 00:18:38,423
We've really missed you.
478
00:18:38,500 --> 00:18:40,580
And I have missed you.
You have no idea.
479
00:18:40,667 --> 00:18:42,877
Well, congratulations
on your wedding.
480
00:18:42,959 --> 00:18:45,079
Welcome to the married
old gals club!
481
00:18:45,166 --> 00:18:46,376
[women laugh]
482
00:18:46,458 --> 00:18:48,378
[Stephanie] He is so handsome.
483
00:18:48,709 --> 00:18:50,169
Oh, my God.
484
00:18:50,250 --> 00:18:53,000
I would like to trade
my husband in for him, please.
[laughs]
485
00:18:53,083 --> 00:18:54,963
[Carrie] She knew they would
understand her.
486
00:18:55,041 --> 00:18:57,211
After all,
they were all married too.
487
00:18:57,291 --> 00:18:58,921
I remember being a newlywed.
488
00:18:59,000 --> 00:19:00,960
We hardly ever got out of bed.
489
00:19:01,041 --> 00:19:02,211
[Meg] Sydney!
490
00:19:02,291 --> 00:19:04,541
[laughs] What?
It's just us girls.
491
00:19:05,041 --> 00:19:06,961
My husband can't get it up.
492
00:19:07,041 --> 00:19:09,041
[Carrie] Perhaps it would have
been wiser
493
00:19:09,125 --> 00:19:11,125
for Charlotte to have had
a Kappa Kappa cappuccino
494
00:19:11,208 --> 00:19:12,958
instead of that third martini.
495
00:19:13,041 --> 00:19:14,961
I'm so frustrated.
496
00:19:15,041 --> 00:19:16,211
Charlotte...
497
00:19:16,291 --> 00:19:17,291
I mean, don't you ever just want
498
00:19:17,375 --> 00:19:18,875
to be really pounded hard?
499
00:19:18,959 --> 00:19:20,039
You know?
500
00:19:20,125 --> 00:19:22,745
Like when the bed
is moving all around,
501
00:19:22,834 --> 00:19:24,134
and it's all sweaty.
502
00:19:24,208 --> 00:19:27,078
And your head is knocking up
against the headboard,
503
00:19:27,166 --> 00:19:29,286
and you feel like
it might just blow off...
504
00:19:29,709 --> 00:19:31,829
Damnit, I just really want
to be fucked, you know?
505
00:19:31,917 --> 00:19:33,747
Just really fucked!
506
00:19:34,750 --> 00:19:36,330
[Carrie] The only heads
blowing off
507
00:19:36,417 --> 00:19:38,457
were those
of Kappa Kappa grandma.
508
00:19:38,542 --> 00:19:39,792
Charlotte...
509
00:19:40,583 --> 00:19:42,333
this is really inappropriate.
510
00:19:42,417 --> 00:19:44,167
Yeah, we're eating.
511
00:19:44,250 --> 00:19:46,630
[scoffs] What's wrong with you,
Charlotte?
You're such a--
512
00:19:46,709 --> 00:19:50,789
What?
What am I, Sydney?
513
00:19:50,875 --> 00:19:54,375
[Carrie] Charlotte realized
how much they'd all changed
since college.
514
00:19:55,792 --> 00:19:58,002
Her friends
had become frenemies.
515
00:19:58,083 --> 00:20:00,213
And to them, she had become...
516
00:20:00,291 --> 00:20:01,711
Samantha.
517
00:20:04,041 --> 00:20:06,001
Here's to new friends!
518
00:20:06,083 --> 00:20:08,923
And gorgeous New York men!
519
00:20:09,000 --> 00:20:10,170
Mmm.
520
00:20:11,583 --> 00:20:15,753
Hey, would you like to join me
at Samba on Friday night?
521
00:20:15,834 --> 00:20:19,834
Two hot broads
at a hot restaurant,
I love it!
522
00:20:19,917 --> 00:20:22,417
The reservation's for four.
523
00:20:27,542 --> 00:20:30,332
Done and done.
524
00:20:30,709 --> 00:20:32,329
[both laughing]
525
00:20:32,417 --> 00:20:33,707
[Carrie] An hour later,
526
00:20:33,792 --> 00:20:35,042
Samantha couldn't believe
527
00:20:35,125 --> 00:20:36,285
how much fun she was having.
528
00:20:36,375 --> 00:20:37,625
She had finally found a woman
529
00:20:37,709 --> 00:20:39,579
who was as open about
her sexuality
530
00:20:39,667 --> 00:20:40,457
as she was.
531
00:20:40,542 --> 00:20:41,542
I call the blonde!
532
00:20:41,625 --> 00:20:46,205
[laughs] Oh, you are too cute.
533
00:20:46,291 --> 00:20:48,291
I could just eat you up.
534
00:20:49,333 --> 00:20:50,633
Yes, I could.
535
00:20:51,750 --> 00:20:54,000
I'm gonna eat you up!
536
00:20:54,083 --> 00:20:55,883
[screams and laughs]
537
00:20:56,667 --> 00:20:57,877
Claire Anne?
538
00:20:57,959 --> 00:20:59,629
[unzipping sound]
539
00:21:04,000 --> 00:21:05,670
Oh, my God!
540
00:21:05,750 --> 00:21:06,960
Excellent!
541
00:21:10,000 --> 00:21:11,670
Claire Anne, I'm going!
542
00:21:11,750 --> 00:21:13,880
[Claire Anne] Wait!
I'll come with you.
543
00:21:18,750 --> 00:21:20,670
And you can forget Samba!
544
00:21:20,750 --> 00:21:22,750
Hey, where are you going?
545
00:21:22,834 --> 00:21:26,544
[Carrie] That night,
Samantha learned she had
a little Charlotte in her.
546
00:21:26,625 --> 00:21:29,575
Just like Charlotte, she had
a line that could be crossed.
547
00:21:29,667 --> 00:21:31,667
Hers was just
a little more to the left.
548
00:21:32,750 --> 00:21:34,080
The next night, I agreed
549
00:21:34,166 --> 00:21:35,576
to meet
Jim and Miranda for drinks.
550
00:21:35,667 --> 00:21:38,787
Jim took me to an amazing
poetry reading last night.
551
00:21:38,875 --> 00:21:40,745
The unpublished works
of Robert Lowell.
552
00:21:40,834 --> 00:21:42,294
He wrote his thesis on Lowell.
553
00:21:42,375 --> 00:21:43,455
Really?
I didn't know that.
554
00:21:43,542 --> 00:21:45,422
There's a lot
you never knew about me.
555
00:21:46,458 --> 00:21:48,208
Another chardonnay
for the beautiful lady.
556
00:21:48,291 --> 00:21:49,711
Oh, thank you.
557
00:21:49,959 --> 00:21:54,499
[Jim] So I lost track of you,
but I always read your column.
558
00:21:54,583 --> 00:21:55,793
It's really good.
559
00:21:55,875 --> 00:21:56,705
Thank you.
560
00:21:56,792 --> 00:21:58,252
Maybe I'd been wrong.
561
00:21:58,333 --> 00:22:01,633
Jim seemed kind,
funny, attentive...
562
00:22:01,959 --> 00:22:03,749
There's a lot of sex in there.
563
00:22:04,375 --> 00:22:05,785
It creeps in.
564
00:22:06,250 --> 00:22:09,420
You didn't seem to know too much
about sex when we were dating.
565
00:22:09,500 --> 00:22:11,420
[Carrie] And still an asshole.
566
00:22:11,500 --> 00:22:12,540
All right, then,
good to see you.
567
00:22:12,625 --> 00:22:13,785
Don't leave. Don't leave.
568
00:22:13,875 --> 00:22:14,915
I was joking.
569
00:22:15,166 --> 00:22:17,746
Stay.
I have really bad timing.
570
00:22:18,125 --> 00:22:20,495
Speaking of which, did you
ever hear his band play?
571
00:22:20,583 --> 00:22:21,713
No, uh-uh.
572
00:22:21,792 --> 00:22:24,172
She was too busy
going shopping for shoes.
573
00:22:24,250 --> 00:22:26,000
I do like my shoes.
574
00:22:26,083 --> 00:22:27,463
Yeah, they come in handy
575
00:22:27,542 --> 00:22:30,132
when you're walking
all over people, huh?
576
00:22:30,417 --> 00:22:31,827
Hey, Jim, c'mon.
577
00:22:31,917 --> 00:22:33,787
What?
Just reliving happy memories.
578
00:22:33,875 --> 00:22:35,955
Carrie doesn't
walk all over people.
579
00:22:36,041 --> 00:22:37,291
She sure as fuck did with me.
580
00:22:37,375 --> 00:22:39,575
Well, maybe that's because
you're an asshole!
581
00:22:39,667 --> 00:22:41,997
I'm an asshole?
She's the asshole.
582
00:22:42,083 --> 00:22:43,883
She never called me once
after we broke up.
583
00:22:43,959 --> 00:22:46,379
That's because
you're an asshole!
584
00:22:46,458 --> 00:22:47,498
She's the asshole.
585
00:22:47,583 --> 00:22:48,583
She's not an asshole!
586
00:22:48,667 --> 00:22:49,667
Thank you, sweetie.
587
00:22:49,750 --> 00:22:50,920
You know what?
588
00:22:51,542 --> 00:22:52,712
Never call me again.
589
00:22:52,792 --> 00:22:54,082
You're breaking up with me?
590
00:22:54,166 --> 00:22:55,246
Oh, yeah!
591
00:22:55,333 --> 00:22:57,213
Ooh, the fancy lawyer lady's
592
00:22:57,291 --> 00:22:58,211
breaking up with me.
593
00:22:58,291 --> 00:23:00,131
Like I give a shit!
594
00:23:00,208 --> 00:23:02,328
[Carrie] Jim hadn't gotten
older or wiser.
595
00:23:02,417 --> 00:23:05,247
Once dumped, he would still
dump on everyone else.
596
00:23:05,333 --> 00:23:07,463
You are such assholes!
597
00:23:14,125 --> 00:23:15,375
Okay, say it.
598
00:23:15,458 --> 00:23:17,038
I told you so.
599
00:23:17,125 --> 00:23:18,205
What an asshole!
600
00:23:18,291 --> 00:23:19,711
I told you so!
601
00:23:20,166 --> 00:23:22,876
Is it bad that it makes me
feel good to say that?
602
00:23:22,959 --> 00:23:23,919
No.
603
00:23:24,250 --> 00:23:26,710
I can't believe
I fell for that asshole.
604
00:23:26,792 --> 00:23:28,582
Your date died. You panicked.
605
00:23:28,667 --> 00:23:30,537
Yeah, you know me too well.
606
00:23:30,625 --> 00:23:33,705
Hey, there are plenty
of other assholes out there.
607
00:23:33,792 --> 00:23:34,792
Ya think?
608
00:23:34,875 --> 00:23:36,785
Yeah, I know.
And I'm an expert.
609
00:23:36,875 --> 00:23:39,325
[laughs] You're such an asshole.
610
00:23:40,417 --> 00:23:42,037
[Carrie] Meanwhile, uptown,
611
00:23:42,125 --> 00:23:45,665
the Samantha in Charlotte
was finally ready to come out.
612
00:23:46,875 --> 00:23:47,955
Hey.
613
00:23:51,083 --> 00:23:53,173
What in God's name
are you wearing?
614
00:23:54,667 --> 00:23:56,667
It's supposed to be sexy.
615
00:23:59,041 --> 00:24:01,331
C'mon, Charlotte,
you're my wife.
616
00:24:01,959 --> 00:24:04,209
That's not you. Take it off.
617
00:24:05,166 --> 00:24:06,206
Fine.
618
00:24:12,625 --> 00:24:13,825
Charlotte...
619
00:24:16,375 --> 00:24:17,495
Look at me.
620
00:24:23,000 --> 00:24:24,210
This is me.
621
00:24:25,834 --> 00:24:29,544
I'm not a Madonna
and I'm not a whore.
622
00:24:30,792 --> 00:24:35,082
I'm your wife,
and I'm sexual,
and I love you.
623
00:24:46,041 --> 00:24:47,171
What are you doing?
624
00:24:49,792 --> 00:24:51,382
I'm touching myself.
625
00:24:53,959 --> 00:24:55,209
I can...
626
00:24:56,125 --> 00:24:57,535
I can see that.
627
00:24:59,083 --> 00:25:00,383
Good.
628
00:25:12,166 --> 00:25:13,576
Trey?
629
00:25:15,417 --> 00:25:17,577
I think we have a stiff breeze.
630
00:25:17,667 --> 00:25:21,167
[Carrie] That night, Trey
successfully screwed his wife
631
00:25:21,250 --> 00:25:23,710
for a full minute and a half...
632
00:25:23,792 --> 00:25:25,382
before the wind died.
633
00:25:26,166 --> 00:25:27,996
After Charlotte's night of love,
634
00:25:28,083 --> 00:25:30,043
she called the one person
she knew
635
00:25:30,125 --> 00:25:32,205
who would
appreciate it the most.
636
00:25:32,291 --> 00:25:33,081
Hello?
637
00:25:33,166 --> 00:25:35,996
Well, he fucked me.
638
00:25:36,083 --> 00:25:38,003
Oh, honey, that's great!
639
00:25:38,083 --> 00:25:39,583
I knew you could do it!
640
00:25:39,667 --> 00:25:40,667
Thanks.
641
00:25:40,750 --> 00:25:41,830
[Samantha]
Oh, hey, don't forget
642
00:25:41,917 --> 00:25:43,207
Samba, Friday night.
643
00:25:43,291 --> 00:25:44,751
I'll be there.
644
00:25:44,834 --> 00:25:46,384
Did you come?
645
00:25:46,458 --> 00:25:48,248
[laughs] Samantha!
646
00:25:48,333 --> 00:25:50,253
[Carrie] Having spent time
with their frenemies,
647
00:25:50,333 --> 00:25:52,633
Charlotte and Samantha
forgot they were enemies
648
00:25:52,709 --> 00:25:54,959
and went back to being friends.
649
00:25:55,041 --> 00:25:58,171
I realized I had become
my own worst frenemy.
650
00:25:58,250 --> 00:26:01,290
I had let 300 desperate women
and one asshole
651
00:26:01,375 --> 00:26:03,245
convince me that
I didn't know anything.
652
00:26:03,333 --> 00:26:05,883
But they were wrong.
I was older and wiser.
653
00:26:05,959 --> 00:26:07,999
So I decided to keep
my second date
654
00:26:08,083 --> 00:26:09,793
with The Learning Annex.
655
00:26:09,875 --> 00:26:12,625
Unfortunately,
my reputation had preceded me.
656
00:26:12,709 --> 00:26:14,459
Wow. Is this it?
657
00:26:15,959 --> 00:26:18,329
Okay. Wow.
658
00:26:18,709 --> 00:26:20,499
Um, hi.
659
00:26:21,125 --> 00:26:22,625
I'm Carrie Bradshaw.
660
00:26:22,875 --> 00:26:25,495
Um, I know you've paid
good money
661
00:26:25,583 --> 00:26:27,633
to find out how to meet men.
662
00:26:27,959 --> 00:26:28,959
And I have to tell you,
663
00:26:29,041 --> 00:26:29,921
I don't know a whole lot
about it,
664
00:26:30,000 --> 00:26:30,960
but I do know this,
665
00:26:31,041 --> 00:26:32,081
you are not gonna meet them
666
00:26:32,166 --> 00:26:33,416
sitting in
a Learning Annex class.
667
00:26:33,500 --> 00:26:35,790
So ladies, grab your bags.
668
00:26:38,166 --> 00:26:40,166
Come on,
we're not getting any younger!
669
00:26:41,208 --> 00:26:42,288
Chop, chop.
670
00:26:43,333 --> 00:26:45,673
That's right.
Just trying to give you
your money's worth.
671
00:26:45,750 --> 00:26:46,960
All right.
672
00:26:47,041 --> 00:26:48,381
I took them
around the corner to a bar,
673
00:26:48,458 --> 00:26:51,128
and took my $300
and bought them drinks.
674
00:26:52,208 --> 00:26:53,328
Okay, Anne.
675
00:26:53,417 --> 00:26:55,457
That guy over there
is checking you out.
676
00:26:56,583 --> 00:26:57,673
Twelve o'clock.
677
00:26:57,959 --> 00:26:59,999
Not everybody, just Anne.
Just Anne.
678
00:27:00,417 --> 00:27:02,417
All right, go over there
and ask him for a light.
679
00:27:02,500 --> 00:27:03,790
I'm already lit.
680
00:27:05,250 --> 00:27:06,670
[women laugh]
681
00:27:06,750 --> 00:27:08,830
Go. Go.
682
00:27:12,000 --> 00:27:14,380
-Hi, got a light?
-[Carrie] Oh, yeah. Victory.
683
00:27:14,458 --> 00:27:15,418
Sure.
684
00:27:15,709 --> 00:27:17,459
Oh, yeah. See?
685
00:27:17,542 --> 00:27:19,752
Okay, one down, five to go.
686
00:27:19,834 --> 00:27:21,294
[Liz] Hey, what about him?
687
00:27:21,375 --> 00:27:23,745
[man] No, that's totally cool
with me. It's fine.
688
00:27:24,709 --> 00:27:25,829
-Excuse me?
-Hey.
689
00:27:25,917 --> 00:27:27,957
Hi. Have you met Liz?
690
00:27:28,041 --> 00:27:29,421
She works in TV.
691
00:27:29,500 --> 00:27:31,580
Get out of here!
I love TV!
692
00:27:32,041 --> 00:27:33,251
Something in common.
693
00:27:33,333 --> 00:27:35,383
That night,
I made three matches.
694
00:27:35,458 --> 00:27:36,788
I didn't even look for myself.
695
00:27:36,875 --> 00:27:39,205
After all,
I try not to date where I work.
696
00:27:39,291 --> 00:27:42,461
So I guess the old and wise
adage is true:
697
00:27:42,542 --> 00:27:44,292
Those who can't do, teach.
698
00:27:44,375 --> 00:27:46,325
And those who can't teach, do.
699
00:27:46,417 --> 00:27:48,497
There's a live one.
Go get him, tiger.
700
00:27:48,583 --> 00:27:50,253
Go, run like the wind.