1
00:00:57,000 --> 00:00:58,380
New York City...
2
00:00:58,458 --> 00:01:00,378
home to one million
exciting,
3
00:01:00,458 --> 00:01:03,208
eligible,
single men...
4
00:01:03,291 --> 00:01:06,831
and four cold, and slightly
cranky, single women.
5
00:01:06,917 --> 00:01:08,077
Well, this is good.
6
00:01:08,166 --> 00:01:10,416
We're actually crossing water
to meet men.
7
00:01:10,500 --> 00:01:13,460
Reminder, I'm not going
to Staten Island to meet men...
8
00:01:13,917 --> 00:01:16,207
I am going
to judge them.
9
00:01:16,291 --> 00:01:19,171
-Once of the perks of being a
minor New York celebrity...
-A little help, a little help.
10
00:01:19,250 --> 00:01:21,580
...is that you get invited
to major events...
11
00:01:21,667 --> 00:01:23,577
like the Fire Department
of New York's
12
00:01:23,667 --> 00:01:25,957
Annual Calendar Competition.
13
00:01:26,875 --> 00:01:28,415
This is an awfully
long way to go
14
00:01:28,500 --> 00:01:30,710
to watch some firemen
take their shirts off.
15
00:01:30,792 --> 00:01:32,422
Honey, I'm on
the fucking ferry.
16
00:01:32,500 --> 00:01:34,040
I better see
more than just pecs.
17
00:01:34,125 --> 00:01:36,705
-Ooh! I'm freezing!
18
00:01:37,709 --> 00:01:39,379
I just--
I don't understand
19
00:01:39,458 --> 00:01:42,328
why they couldn't just hold
the competition in a bar
in Manhattan.
20
00:01:42,417 --> 00:01:44,917
I mean, they have firemen on the
Upper East Side too, you know?
21
00:01:45,000 --> 00:01:46,330
Yes, I know,
they do, sweetie.
22
00:01:46,417 --> 00:01:49,327
And they only put out
the really top-notch fires.
23
00:01:50,750 --> 00:01:52,630
Look at
how small it looks.
24
00:01:53,333 --> 00:01:55,423
Who would've thought
an island that tiny
25
00:01:55,500 --> 00:01:59,170
would be big enough to hold
all our old boyfriends?
26
00:02:05,875 --> 00:02:09,995
Paul Roncello. He's a Virgo.
He loves to cook.
27
00:02:10,083 --> 00:02:12,793
Says he can whip up
a great baked ziti.
28
00:02:12,875 --> 00:02:16,375
He's from Engine 275,
Ladder 133.
29
00:02:16,458 --> 00:02:19,078
Way, way out
in Queens!
30
00:02:23,000 --> 00:02:26,540
♪ Sittin' here eatin'
my heart out, waitin' ♪
31
00:02:26,625 --> 00:02:29,825
♪ Waitin' for
some lover to call ♪
32
00:02:33,542 --> 00:02:34,962
Is he hot?
33
00:02:35,041 --> 00:02:36,381
He's a six.
34
00:02:36,458 --> 00:02:37,958
On a scale of
how many?
35
00:02:38,041 --> 00:02:39,381
♪ Lookin' for
some hot stuff ♪
36
00:02:39,458 --> 00:02:41,128
His name was Bill Kelley.
37
00:02:41,208 --> 00:02:42,538
He was a divorced politician
38
00:02:42,625 --> 00:02:45,165
campaigning for New York City
Comptroller...
39
00:02:45,250 --> 00:02:47,710
and the token
male judge.
40
00:02:50,709 --> 00:02:52,329
Watch the firemen!
41
00:02:52,417 --> 00:02:54,417
I'm more into cops.
42
00:02:54,500 --> 00:02:58,130
Billy McCloud,
he's a Cancer and married!
43
00:02:58,750 --> 00:03:00,670
Sorry, ladies!
44
00:03:00,750 --> 00:03:03,290
His wife Maria,
she says he's a good guy,
45
00:03:03,375 --> 00:03:05,625
-but he works too hard.
Excuse me.
46
00:03:05,709 --> 00:03:08,879
-Work it, Billy! Whoa!
47
00:03:12,917 --> 00:03:15,417
Ladies,
over here!
48
00:03:16,583 --> 00:03:18,833
Okay, they don't
make cosmopolitans.
49
00:03:18,917 --> 00:03:21,127
It's a Staten Island
Iced Tea.
50
00:03:21,208 --> 00:03:23,668
Is that like
a Long Island Iced Tea?
51
00:03:23,750 --> 00:03:25,210
I think so.
52
00:03:26,542 --> 00:03:28,002
Hello,
I'm drunk.
53
00:03:28,417 --> 00:03:31,667
Do we have to be this close?
It's embarrassing.
54
00:03:31,750 --> 00:03:33,920
You gotta be
in it to win it.
55
00:03:34,000 --> 00:03:35,330
I'm moving back.
56
00:03:35,417 --> 00:03:37,787
No, come on, I can't see
the cute firemen
57
00:03:37,875 --> 00:03:39,575
from back there
without my glasses.
58
00:03:39,667 --> 00:03:42,167
Why do you even care
if you can see? You have Steve.
59
00:03:42,250 --> 00:03:43,630
I do not have Steve.
60
00:03:43,709 --> 00:03:45,539
There is no having
of the Steve.
61
00:03:45,625 --> 00:03:46,955
We're just friends.
62
00:03:47,041 --> 00:03:49,881
No, we're just friends,
I don't put my dick in you.
63
00:03:49,959 --> 00:03:52,379
Another one of these
and I might let you.
64
00:03:53,458 --> 00:03:55,208
There are no
datable men here.
65
00:03:55,291 --> 00:03:56,881
What was
your first clue,
66
00:03:56,959 --> 00:03:59,829
the pleather jackets
or the smell of Hai Karate?
67
00:03:59,917 --> 00:04:02,917
This is Ricky Fantucci,
he's a Capricorn,
68
00:04:03,000 --> 00:04:05,420
all his uncles
are firefighters.
69
00:04:05,500 --> 00:04:09,880
Yes, ladies,
that's a cheetah on his arm!
70
00:04:11,375 --> 00:04:16,825
Ricky represents from
Engine 53 in lower Manhattan!
71
00:04:18,000 --> 00:04:21,290
I'd like to show him
my lower Manhattan.
72
00:04:22,041 --> 00:04:23,461
Ew.
73
00:04:24,208 --> 00:04:26,828
Look at his arms, they're huge.
74
00:04:26,917 --> 00:04:28,497
You know
what they say...
75
00:04:28,583 --> 00:04:31,213
"Big arms,
big arms."
76
00:04:31,291 --> 00:04:33,581
Hello, 911?
77
00:04:33,667 --> 00:04:36,127
I'm on fire.
78
00:04:39,542 --> 00:04:50,792
♪ Toot toot,
Hey, beep beep ♪
79
00:04:50,875 --> 00:04:53,285
After the contest,
I began to realize
80
00:04:53,375 --> 00:04:57,125
that Staten Island was like
a quaint European country.
81
00:04:57,208 --> 00:04:59,668
The American music
was 20 years behind
82
00:04:59,750 --> 00:05:02,630
and you could smoke
wherever you wanted.
83
00:05:02,709 --> 00:05:07,129
♪ Talking about
Bad girls, yeah ♪
84
00:05:07,208 --> 00:05:11,378
♪ See them out on the street
At night, walking ♪
85
00:05:11,458 --> 00:05:14,168
♪ Picking up
All kinds of strangers ♪
86
00:05:14,250 --> 00:05:16,040
♪ If the price is right ♪
87
00:05:16,125 --> 00:05:18,995
♪ You can score
If your pocket's nice ♪
88
00:05:20,125 --> 00:05:22,705
♪ But you want a good time ♪
89
00:05:23,792 --> 00:05:24,832
Hi.
90
00:05:25,291 --> 00:05:26,831
Do you know if
those shirts are for sale
91
00:05:26,917 --> 00:05:29,787
because I'd like
to get one for my nephew.
92
00:05:29,875 --> 00:05:31,875
Uh, yeah, you could
buy 'em, but like,
93
00:05:31,959 --> 00:05:33,709
I don't know if you can
buy 'em here or not.
94
00:05:33,792 --> 00:05:35,292
I got
this one at work,
95
00:05:35,375 --> 00:05:37,415
but I'm sure you can buy 'em
in like those other places.
96
00:05:37,500 --> 00:05:39,670
I've seen 'em in those shops,
like on Bleecker or--
97
00:05:39,750 --> 00:05:41,000
Samantha.
98
00:05:41,083 --> 00:05:44,133
-Ricky, how you doing?
-Good, how are you doing?
99
00:05:44,208 --> 00:05:45,998
I saw you up there.
100
00:05:46,083 --> 00:05:47,133
I saw you too.
101
00:05:47,208 --> 00:05:48,788
You looked fantastic.
102
00:05:48,875 --> 00:05:49,995
-Yeah?
-Yeah.
103
00:05:50,083 --> 00:05:51,833
I never did anything
like that before.
104
00:05:51,917 --> 00:05:53,537
But my sisters were like,
"Do it Ricky,"
105
00:05:53,625 --> 00:05:55,665
and I'm like,
"I never did anything
like that before."
106
00:05:55,750 --> 00:05:56,790
And they're like--
107
00:05:56,875 --> 00:05:58,995
Well, you did it
very well.
108
00:05:59,083 --> 00:06:02,043
Hey, I wonder
what month you'll be.
109
00:06:02,125 --> 00:06:03,665
I don't know,
maybe like October.
110
00:06:03,750 --> 00:06:05,170
My birthday's
in October.
111
00:06:05,250 --> 00:06:09,500
I'll bet July or any month
that's hot.
112
00:06:09,583 --> 00:06:12,173
Two songs later it was time
for this dancing queen
113
00:06:12,250 --> 00:06:14,170
to take a breather.
114
00:06:14,250 --> 00:06:15,330
Hello.
115
00:06:15,417 --> 00:06:17,167
-Hi.
-Can I bum a smoke?
116
00:06:17,250 --> 00:06:19,080
-Sure.
-Thanks.
117
00:06:19,166 --> 00:06:20,496
There you go.
118
00:06:21,500 --> 00:06:23,170
Mmm...
119
00:06:23,250 --> 00:06:25,080
Man, that's good.
120
00:06:25,166 --> 00:06:26,576
I quit three years ago.
121
00:06:26,667 --> 00:06:27,747
How's that
working out for you?
122
00:06:27,834 --> 00:06:30,424
Good, I allow myself
one a week.
123
00:06:30,500 --> 00:06:32,790
Mmm, you live right on the edge,
don't you?
124
00:06:33,375 --> 00:06:34,495
Can I buy you
a beer?
125
00:06:34,583 --> 00:06:35,713
No, thanks,
I got it.
126
00:06:35,792 --> 00:06:36,882
C'mon, it's on me.
127
00:06:36,959 --> 00:06:38,579
For helping me out
during the contest.
128
00:06:38,667 --> 00:06:40,037
Okay, sure.
129
00:06:40,625 --> 00:06:43,705
And by the way, you have
the worst taste in men ever.
130
00:06:43,792 --> 00:06:45,212
No way.
131
00:06:45,709 --> 00:06:48,419
You gave that guy
from midtown a seven.
132
00:06:48,500 --> 00:06:50,380
Hey, I like a firefighter
with love handles.
133
00:06:50,458 --> 00:06:52,208
Gives you something
to hold onto when you ride him
134
00:06:52,291 --> 00:06:53,581
down the side
of a burning building.
135
00:06:53,667 --> 00:06:55,537
You got a point there,
my friend.
136
00:06:55,625 --> 00:06:57,205
But you,
you were tough.
137
00:06:57,291 --> 00:06:59,381
And what's with all
those half points?
138
00:06:59,458 --> 00:07:01,078
Six and a half,
eight and a half?
139
00:07:01,166 --> 00:07:04,496
What can I say?
Sometimes a girl needs a half.
140
00:07:06,333 --> 00:07:07,383
So...
141
00:07:07,625 --> 00:07:09,955
Which district
do you vote in?
142
00:07:10,834 --> 00:07:13,044
Whichever one
is near Barneys.
143
00:07:13,125 --> 00:07:15,205
Are you saying you've
never voted in New York City?
144
00:07:15,291 --> 00:07:17,131
You are correct,
Mr. President.
145
00:07:17,333 --> 00:07:18,793
What's your address?
146
00:07:18,875 --> 00:07:21,915
Official government purposes,
I can tell you your district.
147
00:07:22,458 --> 00:07:26,578
Officially,
it's 245 East 73rd Street.
148
00:07:26,667 --> 00:07:27,827
-District 23.
-Mmm.
149
00:07:27,917 --> 00:07:29,077
Same as mine.
150
00:07:29,166 --> 00:07:30,916
I'm at
Madison and 82nd.
151
00:07:31,000 --> 00:07:32,290
Fancy.
152
00:07:32,375 --> 00:07:34,915
I thought all honest politicians
lived in small studios
153
00:07:35,000 --> 00:07:36,500
and ate beans
out of a can.
154
00:07:36,583 --> 00:07:38,173
I'm not
a fan of beans.
155
00:07:39,667 --> 00:07:41,207
Can I get
your phone number?
156
00:07:41,291 --> 00:07:43,251
Government purposes only.
157
00:07:43,333 --> 00:07:45,133
You know what?
I'm just here with my friends
158
00:07:45,208 --> 00:07:46,288
having a good time.
159
00:07:46,375 --> 00:07:47,995
I'm not really
into dating right now.
160
00:07:48,083 --> 00:07:49,713
Why, bad break up?
161
00:08:04,959 --> 00:08:07,039
That was
a long silence.
162
00:08:07,500 --> 00:08:09,790
Actually, it was
a silence and a half.
163
00:08:10,041 --> 00:08:11,541
Have dinner
with me.
164
00:08:13,458 --> 00:08:15,378
Would it help
if I took my shirt off?
165
00:08:18,166 --> 00:08:20,706
Okay, time to go,
politician's hittin' on me.
166
00:08:20,792 --> 00:08:22,712
And is that
a bad thing?
167
00:08:22,792 --> 00:08:25,212
He's just way too
"I'm the guy."
168
00:08:25,291 --> 00:08:27,171
Are you sure?
He's pretty cute.
169
00:08:27,250 --> 00:08:29,040
I didn't want to
have to tell you this,
170
00:08:29,125 --> 00:08:31,625
but I actually saw him
give someone a thumbs up.
171
00:08:31,709 --> 00:08:33,169
We're outta here.
172
00:08:33,250 --> 00:08:35,790
Samantha went home
with that firefighter.
173
00:08:35,875 --> 00:08:37,245
"Toot toot,
beep beep."
174
00:08:37,333 --> 00:08:39,463
And Charlotte's
around here somewhere.
175
00:08:41,709 --> 00:08:44,669
How many cocktails
did she have?
176
00:08:44,750 --> 00:08:47,000
A couple, why?
177
00:08:47,083 --> 00:08:48,253
♪ Hello ♪
178
00:08:48,333 --> 00:08:50,673
♪ Hi, honey, it's me ♪
179
00:08:50,750 --> 00:08:53,630
♪ I went to see
The doctor today ♪
180
00:08:53,709 --> 00:08:55,829
♪ 'Cause ever since
You've been gone ♪
181
00:08:55,917 --> 00:08:59,457
♪ I had a pain
Deep down inside ♪
182
00:08:59,542 --> 00:09:02,212
♪ He says there's nothing
Really wrong with me ♪
183
00:09:02,291 --> 00:09:04,711
-♪ I'm just missing my man ♪
-Missing my man!
184
00:09:04,792 --> 00:09:08,462
♪ So honey, please
Come on home ♪
185
00:09:08,542 --> 00:09:10,712
♪ As soon as you can ♪
186
00:09:10,792 --> 00:09:13,672
♪ Doctors orders ♪
187
00:09:13,750 --> 00:09:18,580
♪ Say there's only
One thing for me ♪
188
00:09:18,667 --> 00:09:20,707
♪ Nothing he can do ♪
189
00:09:20,792 --> 00:09:23,712
And so, three girls
headed home,
190
00:09:23,792 --> 00:09:27,252
taking with them only their
fond memories of Staten Island
191
00:09:27,333 --> 00:09:29,173
and its infamous
iced teas.
192
00:09:29,250 --> 00:09:31,080
Whoo!
193
00:09:31,375 --> 00:09:34,375
Honey, honey,
close up, it's cold.
194
00:09:34,458 --> 00:09:36,498
Whoo-hoo!
195
00:09:37,333 --> 00:09:38,793
Are you
gonna help?
196
00:09:38,875 --> 00:09:41,285
I held her head
in the taxi.
197
00:09:43,834 --> 00:09:45,544
-Oh...
-Oh...
198
00:09:45,625 --> 00:09:47,325
You're so nice, Carrie.
199
00:09:47,417 --> 00:09:49,667
I'm nice too,
aren't I?
200
00:09:49,750 --> 00:09:51,420
Yes, you're nice.
201
00:09:51,500 --> 00:09:53,290
I'm nice!
202
00:09:53,375 --> 00:09:56,415
I'm pretty
and I'm smart!
203
00:09:56,500 --> 00:09:58,080
I'm a catch.
204
00:09:58,166 --> 00:10:00,286
Yes, you're a catch.
205
00:10:00,375 --> 00:10:02,205
I hate you.
206
00:10:02,291 --> 00:10:03,961
You know what?
207
00:10:04,583 --> 00:10:08,333
I'm gonna meet the perfect guy
and I'm gonna get married.
208
00:10:08,417 --> 00:10:10,997
Yes, you're
getting married.
209
00:10:11,083 --> 00:10:12,173
Whoo-hoo!
210
00:10:12,250 --> 00:10:14,250
You hear that,
New York?
211
00:10:14,333 --> 00:10:16,713
I'm getting married
this year!
212
00:10:17,125 --> 00:10:20,535
I'm getting married
and here I come!
213
00:10:20,625 --> 00:10:23,745
If she falls over
I will never stop laughing.
214
00:10:23,834 --> 00:10:26,044
I wasn't quite sure
if it was the iced teas
215
00:10:26,125 --> 00:10:29,375
or the Staten Island dating pool
that broke the camel's back,
216
00:10:29,458 --> 00:10:31,828
but something
set Charlotte on fire.
217
00:10:31,917 --> 00:10:34,377
And uptown
on dry land...
218
00:10:34,458 --> 00:10:37,998
Samantha and Mr. July
had their own fire going.
219
00:10:38,083 --> 00:10:41,753
You're so
big and strong!
220
00:10:44,583 --> 00:10:47,833
I believe the official
fire department term is
221
00:10:47,917 --> 00:10:49,247
"a four alarmer."
222
00:10:49,333 --> 00:10:50,423
Thank you.
223
00:10:50,500 --> 00:10:51,670
The next morning
at breakfast,
224
00:10:51,750 --> 00:10:53,380
Miranda and I
wanted poached eggs,
225
00:10:53,458 --> 00:10:55,498
Samantha wanted to
give us the juicy details,
226
00:10:55,583 --> 00:10:58,173
and Charlotte wanted to
keep her head from exploding
227
00:10:58,250 --> 00:10:59,710
all over her
Burberry raincoat.
228
00:10:59,792 --> 00:11:01,042
And I'm telling you,
229
00:11:01,125 --> 00:11:03,205
I don't think a guy's
ever gotten me that wet.
230
00:11:03,291 --> 00:11:04,461
-Pass the salt.
-Milk?
231
00:11:04,542 --> 00:11:06,292
Ladies, let me tell you
about his cock.
232
00:11:06,375 --> 00:11:07,625
Will you be quiet?
233
00:11:07,709 --> 00:11:10,079
The people at the next table
have a child.
234
00:11:11,458 --> 00:11:12,708
Well, that's their choice.
235
00:11:12,792 --> 00:11:14,462
Little Miss Hangover's right.
Can we, uh...
236
00:11:14,542 --> 00:11:16,832
lighten up on the
cock talk till cocktail time?
237
00:11:16,917 --> 00:11:19,247
Fine. I just wanted to let
you know that my fireman
238
00:11:19,333 --> 00:11:21,713
was every bit the fantasy
I had in mind.
239
00:11:21,792 --> 00:11:22,922
New York's finest.
240
00:11:23,000 --> 00:11:25,040
-That's cops.
-Whatever.
241
00:11:25,125 --> 00:11:27,125
I think it's wrong
to sleep with a man
242
00:11:27,208 --> 00:11:28,958
just to fulfill
A certain fantasy.
243
00:11:29,041 --> 00:11:31,921
Please, all the men we sleep
with fulfill a certain fantasy.
244
00:11:32,000 --> 00:11:34,830
-Or nightmare.
-You fantasize a man
with a Park Avenue apartment
245
00:11:34,917 --> 00:11:36,497
and a nice big
stock portfolio.
246
00:11:36,583 --> 00:11:38,293
For me, it's a fireman
with a nice big hose.
247
00:11:38,375 --> 00:11:41,165
-And why are firemen
always so fucking cute?
-Mmm!
248
00:11:41,250 --> 00:11:43,330
Even when they're not that cute,
they're still cute.
249
00:11:43,417 --> 00:11:44,457
What's up with that?
250
00:11:44,542 --> 00:11:46,252
Well, first there's
a weight limit.
251
00:11:46,333 --> 00:11:48,043
And second,
it's the hero thing.
252
00:11:48,125 --> 00:11:49,665
You know, you see them
up on that truck.
253
00:11:49,750 --> 00:11:50,880
Mmm! That truck is hot.
254
00:11:50,959 --> 00:11:52,209
Hurrying off
to save someone
255
00:11:52,291 --> 00:11:53,791
trapped on a burning ledge
or something.
256
00:11:53,875 --> 00:11:54,995
Plus they've got that
257
00:11:55,083 --> 00:11:56,753
"I'm a good guy"
look in their eyes.
258
00:11:56,834 --> 00:11:58,214
It's that look.
259
00:11:58,291 --> 00:12:01,331
It's because women really
just want to be rescued.
260
00:12:01,417 --> 00:12:02,877
There it was,
261
00:12:02,959 --> 00:12:05,039
the sentence independent,
single women in their 30's
262
00:12:05,125 --> 00:12:07,245
are never supposed to think,
let alone say out loud.
263
00:12:07,333 --> 00:12:09,753
I'm sorry, but it's true.
264
00:12:09,834 --> 00:12:11,214
I've been dating
since I was 15.
265
00:12:11,291 --> 00:12:13,381
I'm exhausted,
where is he?
266
00:12:13,458 --> 00:12:15,038
Who, the white knight?
267
00:12:15,125 --> 00:12:17,375
That only happens
in fairy tales.
268
00:12:17,458 --> 00:12:18,918
My hair hurts.
269
00:12:19,583 --> 00:12:20,923
Charlotte, honey,
270
00:12:21,000 --> 00:12:23,500
did you ever think that maybe
we're the white knights
271
00:12:23,583 --> 00:12:26,503
and we're the ones
that have to save ourselves?
272
00:12:27,500 --> 00:12:29,580
That is
so depressing.
273
00:12:30,125 --> 00:12:32,245
Is it?
274
00:12:32,333 --> 00:12:36,173
Later that day, I got to
thinking about fairy tales.
275
00:12:36,250 --> 00:12:39,000
What if Prince Charming
had never showed up?
276
00:12:39,083 --> 00:12:42,253
Would Snow White have slept
in that glass coffin forever?
277
00:12:42,333 --> 00:12:45,753
Or would she have eventually
woken up, spit out the apple,
278
00:12:45,834 --> 00:12:47,464
gotten a job,
a health care package,
279
00:12:47,542 --> 00:12:50,332
and a baby from her
local neighborhood sperm bank?
280
00:12:50,417 --> 00:12:51,917
I couldn't
help but wonder,
281
00:12:52,000 --> 00:12:55,420
inside every confident,
driven single woman,
282
00:12:55,500 --> 00:12:58,250
is there a delicate,
fragile princess
283
00:12:58,333 --> 00:13:00,293
just waiting to be saved?
284
00:13:00,375 --> 00:13:02,035
Was Charlotte right?
285
00:13:02,125 --> 00:13:05,245
Do women just
want to be rescued?
286
00:13:05,333 --> 00:13:08,633
And after your
laser surgery on Saturday,
287
00:13:08,709 --> 00:13:12,629
you'll need a significant other
or a friend
288
00:13:12,709 --> 00:13:15,789
to help get you home...
Sign here.
289
00:13:15,875 --> 00:13:18,785
While for some women, the idea
of rescue was a life raft,
290
00:13:18,875 --> 00:13:20,325
for Miranda,
it was an insult.
291
00:13:20,417 --> 00:13:23,747
I really don't need anybody
to help me, I'll be fine.
292
00:13:23,834 --> 00:13:27,084
No, you'll be sedated
and your vision will be blurred.
293
00:13:27,166 --> 00:13:30,496
You will need someone
to get you home and up to bed.
294
00:13:30,583 --> 00:13:32,883
Then you take
two sleeping pills.
295
00:13:32,959 --> 00:13:35,129
Sleep for 12 hours,
wake up,
296
00:13:35,208 --> 00:13:36,918
and you'll be able
to see perfectly.
297
00:13:37,000 --> 00:13:38,710
I can't believe
I'm gonna wake up
298
00:13:38,792 --> 00:13:41,332
and be able to see clearly
without glasses or contacts
299
00:13:41,417 --> 00:13:43,787
for the first time
in my life.
300
00:13:43,875 --> 00:13:45,035
Believe it.
301
00:13:46,709 --> 00:13:48,709
And then they slit
your eyeball open
302
00:13:48,792 --> 00:13:49,832
and flip up the top.
303
00:13:49,917 --> 00:13:51,127
Oh, man, gross.
304
00:13:51,208 --> 00:13:53,918
Steve, it just flips right up,
flip, my eye!
305
00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:55,500
Okay, okay, stop.
306
00:13:55,583 --> 00:13:57,463
This little blade
cuts it...
307
00:13:57,542 --> 00:13:58,832
Just--
308
00:13:58,917 --> 00:14:00,577
Like the top
of a grape.
309
00:14:03,291 --> 00:14:05,081
That sounds
pretty bad.
310
00:14:06,583 --> 00:14:08,753
You want me to come down
and hold your hand?
311
00:14:08,834 --> 00:14:11,754
I'm fine, I do not need
anyone to hold my hand.
312
00:14:11,834 --> 00:14:15,254
Jeez, I'm not saying
you need anyone,
313
00:14:15,333 --> 00:14:17,173
I'd just like
to be there.
314
00:14:17,417 --> 00:14:19,077
To help you,
whatever.
315
00:14:19,500 --> 00:14:21,330
You're gonna need help
getting home.
316
00:14:21,417 --> 00:14:24,417
Um, yeah,
I'm gonna ask Carrie.
317
00:14:26,083 --> 00:14:29,003
Why do you have to ask Carrie
when I'm offering right now?
318
00:14:29,083 --> 00:14:32,003
Because, you know,
Carrie's my friend.
319
00:14:32,083 --> 00:14:33,883
Oh, okay,
and what am I?
320
00:14:33,959 --> 00:14:36,999
Well, we haven't exactly
established that yet.
321
00:14:38,500 --> 00:14:39,790
Are you coming up?
322
00:14:39,875 --> 00:14:43,915
Eh... We haven't exactly
established that yet.
323
00:14:48,417 --> 00:14:49,787
What are we doing here?
324
00:14:49,875 --> 00:14:50,995
I mean, are we--
325
00:14:51,083 --> 00:14:52,043
Steve...
326
00:14:52,125 --> 00:14:53,745
After they
flip the eye up,
327
00:14:53,834 --> 00:14:55,964
then these jets--
328
00:14:57,583 --> 00:14:59,213
And over on the East Side,
329
00:14:59,291 --> 00:15:01,881
at a more
Charlotte-friendly bar,
330
00:15:01,959 --> 00:15:04,289
the Iced Tea Princess
began her quest
331
00:15:04,375 --> 00:15:05,875
for a white knight.
332
00:15:05,959 --> 00:15:08,419
Oh my God,
so cute.
333
00:15:08,500 --> 00:15:09,630
Cute, right?
334
00:15:09,709 --> 00:15:10,829
Very cute.
335
00:15:10,917 --> 00:15:13,167
And let's not forget,
I'm a professional.
336
00:15:15,166 --> 00:15:16,416
I have to
meet him.
337
00:15:16,500 --> 00:15:17,790
How am I
gonna meet him?
338
00:15:17,875 --> 00:15:19,415
Sweetie, we got here
ten minutes ago,
339
00:15:19,500 --> 00:15:20,580
pace yourself.
340
00:15:20,667 --> 00:15:21,997
Hey, beautiful.
I'm J.J.
341
00:15:22,083 --> 00:15:24,083
Can I buy those
sweet lips a drink?
342
00:15:24,166 --> 00:15:26,076
-Oh.
-Um...
343
00:15:26,166 --> 00:15:28,626
I'm sorry,
we were just leaving.
344
00:15:28,709 --> 00:15:30,289
Charlotte was a firm believer
345
00:15:30,375 --> 00:15:32,245
in the laws of
dating feng shui.
346
00:15:32,333 --> 00:15:34,583
Change location,
change luck.
347
00:15:34,667 --> 00:15:37,577
Why is it always a guy
like that, is it me?
348
00:15:37,667 --> 00:15:39,037
No, sweetie,
it's not you.
349
00:15:39,125 --> 00:15:41,285
Into every life,
a little J.J. must fall.
350
00:15:41,375 --> 00:15:45,165
I just want a nice, sweet,
handsome, funny,
351
00:15:45,250 --> 00:15:47,080
great guy who doesn't
say things like,
352
00:15:47,166 --> 00:15:48,576
"Sweet lips."
353
00:15:48,667 --> 00:15:50,377
Is that
too much to ask?
354
00:15:50,458 --> 00:15:51,998
Hey, hey!
355
00:15:52,083 --> 00:15:53,883
You didn't leave,
you're just over here now.
356
00:15:53,959 --> 00:15:55,499
C'mon, let me
buy you a drink.
357
00:15:55,583 --> 00:15:56,793
I'm really
not interested.
358
00:15:56,875 --> 00:15:58,875
One drink, I'll even
buy blondie here one.
359
00:15:58,959 --> 00:16:00,289
One little drinky.
360
00:16:00,375 --> 00:16:01,785
Excuse me,
361
00:16:02,083 --> 00:16:03,583
she said
she's not interested.
362
00:16:03,667 --> 00:16:04,787
Am I talkin'
to you?
363
00:16:04,875 --> 00:16:05,785
No.
364
00:16:05,875 --> 00:16:07,285
-Come on--
-You're not listening.
365
00:16:07,375 --> 00:16:08,285
The lady said--
366
00:16:08,375 --> 00:16:09,705
Hey, fuck you.
367
00:16:10,583 --> 00:16:11,543
Oh!
368
00:16:13,542 --> 00:16:15,212
I'm sorry
about that.
369
00:16:15,291 --> 00:16:16,711
Um...
370
00:16:16,792 --> 00:16:18,502
Did you
hurt your hand?
371
00:16:18,583 --> 00:16:19,503
No.
372
00:16:19,583 --> 00:16:21,213
His name was Arthur.
373
00:16:21,291 --> 00:16:23,541
He was a nice, sweet,
handsome, funny,
374
00:16:23,625 --> 00:16:25,035
great investment banker
375
00:16:25,125 --> 00:16:27,495
who lived between
Madison and 5th.
376
00:16:27,583 --> 00:16:30,043
So, maybe there really
were white knights.
377
00:16:30,125 --> 00:16:32,035
A little help...
378
00:16:34,792 --> 00:16:36,752
The day after Charlotte
met her knight,
379
00:16:36,834 --> 00:16:38,464
I met my credit card limit.
380
00:16:38,542 --> 00:16:40,002
With no man in sight,
381
00:16:40,083 --> 00:16:43,333
I decided to rescue my ankles
from a life of boredom
382
00:16:43,417 --> 00:16:46,917
by purchasing too many pairs
of Jimmy Choo shoes.
383
00:16:47,458 --> 00:16:49,328
Hello.
My name's Bill Kelley
384
00:16:49,417 --> 00:16:51,457
and I want to be
your city comptroller.
385
00:16:51,542 --> 00:16:52,712
You're not
seriously here.
386
00:16:52,792 --> 00:16:54,582
Oh yes, ma'am,
I assure you, I am.
387
00:16:54,667 --> 00:16:57,327
And I brought along
some voter registration forms.
388
00:16:57,417 --> 00:16:59,127
I took the liberty
of filling out your name.
389
00:16:59,208 --> 00:17:01,328
Under "occupation"
I put heartbreaker.
390
00:17:01,417 --> 00:17:02,917
I really did, look.
391
00:17:03,417 --> 00:17:06,127
You're like a Jehovah's Witness
with a good suit.
392
00:17:07,041 --> 00:17:09,171
So how long you been
sitting here?
393
00:17:09,250 --> 00:17:10,170
Your number's
not listed.
394
00:17:10,250 --> 00:17:12,000
-Exactly.
-What'd you buy?
395
00:17:12,083 --> 00:17:14,293
-Shoes.
-Let me see.
396
00:17:15,000 --> 00:17:16,500
C'mon, sit down
and show me.
397
00:17:16,583 --> 00:17:18,383
God, you are...
398
00:17:18,875 --> 00:17:20,125
I know.
399
00:17:23,125 --> 00:17:25,455
I'm not
showing you a shoe.
400
00:17:26,125 --> 00:17:28,415
Ooh, sexy.
401
00:17:29,041 --> 00:17:30,381
Hey, I need a favor.
402
00:17:30,458 --> 00:17:31,628
Oh, you do?
403
00:17:31,709 --> 00:17:33,499
Actually, it's for
The city of New York.
404
00:17:33,583 --> 00:17:35,583
See, I really am
one of the good guys.
405
00:17:35,667 --> 00:17:37,287
And right now I'm carrying
all the boroughs,
406
00:17:37,375 --> 00:17:39,035
but I still need help
in Staten Island.
407
00:17:39,125 --> 00:17:41,325
-You want one?
-No, I had one Thursday.
408
00:17:42,000 --> 00:17:43,960
So, here's the thing.
409
00:17:44,041 --> 00:17:45,541
I gotta go
back out there
410
00:17:45,625 --> 00:17:48,375
to do a schmooze
at the Capri Restaurant
411
00:17:48,458 --> 00:17:49,708
on Sunday night
412
00:17:49,792 --> 00:17:51,672
and I want you
to go with me.
413
00:17:52,291 --> 00:17:53,751
And why is that?
414
00:17:53,834 --> 00:17:55,504
'Cause they have
great Italian.
415
00:17:55,583 --> 00:17:58,793
And also,
for the record...
416
00:18:00,417 --> 00:18:02,167
I can't stop
thinking about you.
417
00:18:03,625 --> 00:18:05,325
So I'll pick you up
at 7:00.
418
00:18:05,417 --> 00:18:07,827
-Um, no.
-Don't answer now.
419
00:18:07,917 --> 00:18:09,287
-I just did.
-Think about it.
420
00:18:09,375 --> 00:18:11,915
I'll drive by at 7:00,
I'll wait down in the car.
421
00:18:12,000 --> 00:18:13,750
You come down,
you come.
422
00:18:13,834 --> 00:18:16,634
You don't, no pressure,
wear the shoes.
423
00:18:17,500 --> 00:18:19,630
Oh, keep these.
424
00:18:20,000 --> 00:18:21,330
Pass them out.
425
00:18:22,583 --> 00:18:24,213
That Saturday, when I was unable
426
00:18:24,291 --> 00:18:26,041
to take Miranda
to her laser surgery
427
00:18:26,125 --> 00:18:28,375
due to a looming
column deadline,
428
00:18:28,458 --> 00:18:29,958
she didn't call Steve.
429
00:18:30,041 --> 00:18:32,751
She decided to take things
into her own hands.
430
00:18:32,834 --> 00:18:34,754
Who needs a man
to hold your hand
431
00:18:34,834 --> 00:18:37,334
when you have cab fare
and a big black marker
432
00:18:37,417 --> 00:18:39,667
to write down
emergency numbers.
433
00:18:39,750 --> 00:18:41,750
And while Miranda
was under the knife,
434
00:18:41,834 --> 00:18:44,544
Charlotte was having
her first glass of white wine
435
00:18:44,625 --> 00:18:45,875
with her white knight.
436
00:18:45,959 --> 00:18:48,039
So I did the Hasty
Pudding show a couple times
437
00:18:48,125 --> 00:18:49,455
just to
blow off steam.
438
00:18:49,542 --> 00:18:51,172
My friend Tom says
that Harvard is still
439
00:18:51,250 --> 00:18:53,920
the most massively aggressive
place he's ever seen.
440
00:18:54,000 --> 00:18:55,330
And he's a trader.
441
00:18:55,417 --> 00:18:56,327
Not Tom Kennedy.
442
00:18:56,417 --> 00:18:58,377
Oh my God, yes!
Do you know Tom?
443
00:18:58,458 --> 00:19:00,328
Great guy.
And how about his wife?
444
00:19:00,417 --> 00:19:03,537
Now that's my idea
of the perfect marriage.
445
00:19:03,625 --> 00:19:04,745
Totally.
446
00:19:04,834 --> 00:19:06,254
Charlotte nodded,
thinking,
447
00:19:06,333 --> 00:19:08,253
"What a nice, sweet,
Handsome, funny,
448
00:19:08,333 --> 00:19:09,833
great couple they made."
449
00:19:09,917 --> 00:19:13,247
Excuse me, you just
bumped into her chair.
450
00:19:13,333 --> 00:19:14,543
A little crowded.
451
00:19:14,625 --> 00:19:16,415
Yes, it's crowded,
but you bumped her chair,
452
00:19:16,500 --> 00:19:17,580
spilled her wine.
453
00:19:17,667 --> 00:19:19,127
You should
say you're sorry.
454
00:19:19,208 --> 00:19:20,128
It's okay.
455
00:19:20,208 --> 00:19:21,578
No, it's not okay.
456
00:19:22,375 --> 00:19:23,955
That's no way
to treat a lady.
457
00:19:24,041 --> 00:19:26,711
Lighten up,
it's brunch.
458
00:19:32,917 --> 00:19:34,537
Charlotte suddenly realized
459
00:19:34,625 --> 00:19:37,915
that her date wasn't a man
who came to a woman's rescue.
460
00:19:38,000 --> 00:19:40,130
He was a man who liked
to start fights.
461
00:19:40,208 --> 00:19:42,078
-Excuse me, sir.
-You want a piece of me?
462
00:19:43,750 --> 00:19:45,170
And just like that,
463
00:19:45,250 --> 00:19:49,170
Charlotte's white knight
changed into a white nightmare.
464
00:19:50,750 --> 00:19:53,080
Miss Hobbes,
Your friend is here.
465
00:19:54,417 --> 00:19:55,667
Carrie?
466
00:19:55,750 --> 00:19:57,210
Actually no, it's me.
467
00:19:57,291 --> 00:19:59,921
Carrie thought you might need
a little help, is that okay?
468
00:20:00,291 --> 00:20:03,251
I'm on Valium,
everything's okay.
469
00:20:04,083 --> 00:20:05,833
Here, give me
your hand.
470
00:20:05,917 --> 00:20:07,127
I'm good.
471
00:20:08,709 --> 00:20:10,919
Just don't let me
hit the door frame
472
00:20:11,000 --> 00:20:13,420
and never mention
these goggles.
473
00:20:15,834 --> 00:20:19,004
One cab ride and two
potent sleeping pills later,
474
00:20:19,083 --> 00:20:20,543
Steve put
Miranda to bed.
475
00:20:20,625 --> 00:20:23,285
Alright, okay,
no, give me your leg.
476
00:20:23,375 --> 00:20:24,575
No-- Yeah, this leg.
477
00:20:24,667 --> 00:20:26,747
No, I want this leg.
Give me--
478
00:20:26,834 --> 00:20:29,214
Stop!
No, no rescue.
479
00:20:29,291 --> 00:20:30,711
Alright,
fine, okay.
480
00:20:30,792 --> 00:20:33,922
Alright, put your feet
under here, sleeping beauty.
481
00:20:38,166 --> 00:20:40,746
The next morning,
after what felt like she'd slept
482
00:20:40,834 --> 00:20:42,214
for a hundred years,
483
00:20:42,291 --> 00:20:44,291
Miranda awoke.
484
00:20:52,667 --> 00:20:54,787
And for the first time
in her life,
485
00:20:54,875 --> 00:20:56,955
saw things clearly.
486
00:21:11,000 --> 00:21:13,750
That night, Mr. July
invited Samantha to come down
487
00:21:13,834 --> 00:21:17,504
and hang with him while
he worked the Sunday shift.
488
00:21:18,500 --> 00:21:20,040
Hello!
489
00:21:20,125 --> 00:21:22,325
Where is everyone?
490
00:21:22,417 --> 00:21:24,247
The idea of spending
time in a firehouse
491
00:21:24,333 --> 00:21:27,043
filled with a veritable
calendar year of hot firemen
492
00:21:27,125 --> 00:21:28,665
was a fantasy,
Samantha felt,
493
00:21:28,750 --> 00:21:30,920
whose time had
most definitely come.
494
00:21:31,000 --> 00:21:32,040
Boys.
495
00:21:39,208 --> 00:21:41,378
This was not
the firehouse fantasy
496
00:21:41,458 --> 00:21:43,078
Samantha had in mind.
497
00:21:48,250 --> 00:21:50,080
-Hey, Samantha.
498
00:21:50,166 --> 00:21:52,786
I just put a pot of chili on,
c'mon, c'mon, sit down.
499
00:21:52,875 --> 00:21:55,285
C'mon, brother, get up,
make room for Sam.
500
00:21:58,041 --> 00:21:59,711
I'll be right back.
501
00:21:59,792 --> 00:22:01,542
Samantha's rescue fantasy
502
00:22:01,625 --> 00:22:04,785
was suddenly something
she needed to be rescued from.
503
00:22:09,166 --> 00:22:11,036
It's me, leave a message.
504
00:22:11,125 --> 00:22:12,785
Hey...
505
00:22:12,875 --> 00:22:15,245
I'm still down here
in the car.
506
00:22:16,583 --> 00:22:20,043
Alright, I'll wait ten more
seconds and then I'll go alone.
507
00:22:20,125 --> 00:22:24,875
Ten, nine,
eight, seven,
508
00:22:24,959 --> 00:22:28,079
six, poor me,
509
00:22:28,166 --> 00:22:33,456
five, four,
three, two...
510
00:22:34,709 --> 00:22:35,959
one,
511
00:22:36,041 --> 00:22:37,921
one and a half.
512
00:22:38,000 --> 00:22:40,380
Sometimes a girl
needs a half.
513
00:22:41,750 --> 00:22:43,540
Okay, that was
my best shot.
514
00:22:44,417 --> 00:22:45,787
You're not coming.
515
00:22:46,583 --> 00:22:48,003
So long...
516
00:22:48,083 --> 00:22:49,583
Vote!
517
00:23:04,375 --> 00:23:06,035
I don't know
what I'm doing.
518
00:23:06,125 --> 00:23:07,245
Okay.
519
00:23:07,333 --> 00:23:09,583
I'm standing here,
fully dressed,
520
00:23:09,875 --> 00:23:12,875
watching that politician guy
521
00:23:12,959 --> 00:23:15,879
drive off to Staten Island
without me, why?
522
00:23:15,959 --> 00:23:17,249
You hate
Staten Island?
523
00:23:17,333 --> 00:23:20,003
No, don't think so,
any other ideas?
524
00:23:23,667 --> 00:23:25,127
Just say it.
525
00:23:25,834 --> 00:23:27,004
Big.
526
00:23:27,083 --> 00:23:28,883
You're terrified
of getting hurt again.
527
00:23:28,959 --> 00:23:31,039
There it was,
the phrase single,
528
00:23:31,125 --> 00:23:32,575
independent women in their 30's
529
00:23:32,667 --> 00:23:35,537
are never supposed to think,
let alone say out loud.
530
00:23:35,625 --> 00:23:37,785
-Yep, okay, gotta go.
531
00:23:39,458 --> 00:23:40,668
Miranda was right.
532
00:23:40,750 --> 00:23:42,500
I was like a woman
frozen on the ledge
533
00:23:42,583 --> 00:23:44,133
of a building on fire.
534
00:23:44,208 --> 00:23:46,628
I'd been so burned
in my last relationship,
535
00:23:46,709 --> 00:23:49,829
I was afraid to
leap off into the next one.
536
00:24:05,709 --> 00:24:07,459
Excuse me
for a second.
537
00:24:08,166 --> 00:24:09,166
Hey.
538
00:24:09,250 --> 00:24:10,880
Hi, how'd you
get here?
539
00:24:10,959 --> 00:24:12,169
Ferry.
540
00:24:12,250 --> 00:24:13,210
All alone?
541
00:24:13,291 --> 00:24:14,831
I'm very independent.
542
00:24:14,917 --> 00:24:16,207
I can see that.
543
00:24:16,291 --> 00:24:18,881
And... this isn't a date.
544
00:24:19,625 --> 00:24:21,285
I'm here
as a concerned citizen.
545
00:24:21,375 --> 00:24:22,575
There's a woman
on my block
546
00:24:22,667 --> 00:24:24,127
who will not pick up
after her poodle.
547
00:24:24,208 --> 00:24:25,748
I'll see what I can do.
548
00:24:26,041 --> 00:24:27,671
Can I take your coat?
549
00:24:29,208 --> 00:24:31,538
And, Mr. President...
550
00:24:33,000 --> 00:24:34,750
It was
a bad break-up...
551
00:24:34,834 --> 00:24:37,544
So I need to
take this slow.
552
00:24:42,542 --> 00:24:44,832
Somewhere between
The chili and halftime,
553
00:24:44,917 --> 00:24:48,287
Samantha decided if she wanted
her firehouse fantasy to happen,
554
00:24:48,375 --> 00:24:50,285
she'd have to
make it happen.
555
00:24:50,375 --> 00:24:52,035
Up here!
556
00:24:57,041 --> 00:24:59,961
Nice pole,
wanna see it again?
557
00:25:00,041 --> 00:25:01,211
Oh, yeah.
558
00:25:05,125 --> 00:25:08,245
Samantha rode the pole
a couple of times that night.
559
00:25:13,208 --> 00:25:16,168
Why are these boots
set up like this, huh?
560
00:25:16,250 --> 00:25:18,330
You have to be ready
at a moment's notice.
561
00:25:18,417 --> 00:25:20,957
Oh, well I should be a fireman,
562
00:25:21,041 --> 00:25:24,291
because I'm always ready to go.
563
00:25:27,417 --> 00:25:29,287
We got a job!
564
00:25:31,875 --> 00:25:33,165
-Get out of my gear.
-Hmm?
565
00:25:33,250 --> 00:25:35,630
Get the fuck out of
my fucking gear!
566
00:25:35,709 --> 00:25:39,039
Let's go, move lady,
there's a fucking fire!
567
00:25:43,417 --> 00:25:45,327
I'm coming.
568
00:25:58,667 --> 00:26:00,627
Samantha learned
there was quite a difference
569
00:26:00,709 --> 00:26:04,669
between a rescue fantasy
and a rescue reality.
570
00:26:09,000 --> 00:26:10,540
It's getting late,
you think, uh--
571
00:26:10,625 --> 00:26:12,075
Sure I can't
give you a ride?
572
00:26:12,166 --> 00:26:13,786
No, no.
573
00:26:14,250 --> 00:26:15,750
I'm good.
574
00:26:16,041 --> 00:26:17,421
You go...
575
00:26:18,291 --> 00:26:20,041
You go
do your thing.
576
00:26:20,125 --> 00:26:21,995
Hey, do I get
your vote?
577
00:26:28,750 --> 00:26:30,130
Too fast?
578
00:26:33,250 --> 00:26:36,040
Oh, my God, you're so sexy,
come home with me.
579
00:26:36,333 --> 00:26:38,293
No, no, kissing
is enough.
580
00:26:38,375 --> 00:26:40,825
It's enough
for tonight, really.
581
00:26:44,041 --> 00:26:45,131
Oh!
582
00:26:51,333 --> 00:26:54,833
Oh, shit, it's almost 12:00.
I'm gonna miss the last ferry.
583
00:27:08,500 --> 00:27:10,290
Oh, wait!
584
00:27:10,375 --> 00:27:11,285
Oh!
585
00:27:13,959 --> 00:27:15,539
Wait!
586
00:27:18,083 --> 00:27:20,883
I lost my Choo!
587
00:27:22,083 --> 00:27:23,293
Shit.
588
00:27:39,041 --> 00:27:40,421
Need a ride?
589
00:27:43,333 --> 00:27:45,963
Well, he didn't
have a white horse,
590
00:27:46,041 --> 00:27:49,631
but he did have a BMW
with a working heater.
591
00:27:49,709 --> 00:27:53,749
So I guess sometimes a woman
absolutely has to be rescued.
592
00:27:54,208 --> 00:27:56,498
You're taking me
to my apartment and that's it.
593
00:27:56,583 --> 00:27:57,793
That's it...
594
00:27:58,041 --> 00:27:59,291
for tonight.
595
00:28:03,250 --> 00:28:06,920
Now, do you have any idea how
we get the fuck off this island?
596
00:28:07,875 --> 00:28:09,495
Um, okay,
make a right.
597
00:28:09,583 --> 00:28:14,003
And sometimes a woman
absolutely has to rescue a man.
598
00:28:14,083 --> 00:28:15,503
At least that's how it ends
599
00:28:15,583 --> 00:28:18,293
in this Staten Island
ferry tale.