1
00:00:46,009 --> 00:00:49,009
[Carrie] There are a million
reasons to celebrate
in New York City...
2
00:00:49,013 --> 00:00:52,003
Steve no longer
having testicular cancer,
3
00:00:52,002 --> 00:00:54,002
was just one of them.
4
00:00:54,022 --> 00:00:57,022
I only have
one ball left.
5
00:01:01,003 --> 00:01:02,013
I don't care
who wins,
6
00:01:02,015 --> 00:01:04,015
it's me and you
after this, buddy.
7
00:01:04,019 --> 00:01:06,009
Great!
8
00:01:06,010 --> 00:01:09,010
It all comes down to
just one little ball.
9
00:01:10,007 --> 00:01:11,007
Who wants a beer?
10
00:01:11,008 --> 00:01:12,018
-Oh!
-Hey!
11
00:01:17,022 --> 00:01:19,012
Samantha?
12
00:01:23,018 --> 00:01:24,998
One ball?
13
00:01:25,023 --> 00:01:27,013
One ball?
14
00:01:27,007 --> 00:01:28,017
Oh, I'm sorry,
I wasn't thinking.
15
00:01:29,000 --> 00:01:30,000
Was he upset?
16
00:01:30,002 --> 00:01:31,012
Embarrassed,
I think.
17
00:01:31,012 --> 00:01:32,022
There's nothing to
be embarrassed about.
18
00:01:32,022 --> 00:01:33,022
He's still got one.
19
00:01:33,023 --> 00:01:36,003
Oh, Miranda,
they come in a set,
like earrings.
20
00:01:36,003 --> 00:01:37,013
Oh, he's doing great.
21
00:01:37,012 --> 00:01:39,012
If it were me,
I'd be sitting home
all depressed.
22
00:01:39,012 --> 00:01:40,012
Explain that to me.
23
00:01:40,014 --> 00:01:41,014
Tell me why
you'd be depressed
24
00:01:41,014 --> 00:01:42,024
if you were
perfectly healthy
25
00:01:42,021 --> 00:01:45,001
but had to go through
life without balls.
26
00:01:45,002 --> 00:01:47,002
-Well...
-I was talking to Aidan.
27
00:01:47,004 --> 00:01:48,024
Well, maybe
it's bullshit, but...
28
00:01:48,023 --> 00:01:51,003
I might feel like less
of a man or something.
29
00:01:51,004 --> 00:01:52,014
A couple of
hanging glands
30
00:01:52,013 --> 00:01:54,023
has nothing to do with
making somebody a man.
31
00:01:54,017 --> 00:01:55,017
[Samantha] She's right.
32
00:01:55,018 --> 00:01:56,998
I once went out
with this guy,
33
00:01:57,005 --> 00:01:58,015
the biggest balls
I've ever seen,
34
00:01:58,023 --> 00:02:00,013
complete pussy.
35
00:02:00,012 --> 00:02:01,012
How big?
36
00:02:01,010 --> 00:02:04,000
Huge, I could barely
fit one in my mouth.
37
00:02:05,020 --> 00:02:07,020
Welcome to my world.
38
00:02:07,021 --> 00:02:09,021
The irony is that
I don't think
women care
39
00:02:09,021 --> 00:02:11,021
that much
about balls.
40
00:02:11,019 --> 00:02:13,019
I know I don't,
do you, Carrie?
41
00:02:13,019 --> 00:02:15,019
Except for yours,
darling.
42
00:02:15,019 --> 00:02:17,009
I'm very
into yours.
43
00:02:17,007 --> 00:02:19,017
I have never met a man
who wasn't into his balls.
44
00:02:19,023 --> 00:02:22,013
"Oh, yeah, baby,
that's it,
45
00:02:22,013 --> 00:02:25,013
grab my big balls,
lick them, pull them."
46
00:02:25,012 --> 00:02:26,022
You pull
the balls?
47
00:02:26,022 --> 00:02:29,002
Mm-hmm,
they like it.
48
00:02:29,002 --> 00:02:30,012
I went out with
this guy...
49
00:02:30,010 --> 00:02:32,020
-I'm sure you did.
-Wait, please let her finish.
50
00:02:32,023 --> 00:02:34,023
She's done.
51
00:02:34,018 --> 00:02:37,008
Now, I'm thinking
balls are to men,
52
00:02:37,014 --> 00:02:39,014
what purses
are to women.
53
00:02:39,012 --> 00:02:41,002
It's just
a little bag,
54
00:02:41,002 --> 00:02:43,022
but we'd feel naked
in public without it.
55
00:02:43,018 --> 00:02:45,008
[man]
Samantha Jones.
56
00:02:46,009 --> 00:02:48,019
Hey, how are you?
57
00:02:48,019 --> 00:02:50,009
Great!
58
00:02:50,011 --> 00:02:52,021
Everyone,
this is, um...
59
00:02:52,023 --> 00:02:54,023
Allan,
Allan Jannis.
60
00:02:55,000 --> 00:02:56,020
Allan Jannis,
right, we...
61
00:02:57,001 --> 00:02:57,021
Fucked!
62
00:02:57,023 --> 00:03:01,023
Fucked, I knew
I knew you!
63
00:03:01,018 --> 00:03:02,018
How the hell
are you?
64
00:03:03,000 --> 00:03:03,020
Not bad,
65
00:03:04,000 --> 00:03:05,020
just designed
the new Richard Wright hotel.
66
00:03:05,018 --> 00:03:08,008
I've been trying to get
a meeting with him
for months.
67
00:03:08,007 --> 00:03:09,007
Who's doing
his PR?
68
00:03:09,014 --> 00:03:11,024
I think he's talking
to Brad Rosen.
69
00:03:11,020 --> 00:03:12,020
Oh, he's a hack.
70
00:03:12,022 --> 00:03:14,012
Get me a meeting?
71
00:03:14,011 --> 00:03:15,021
I'll do what I can.
72
00:03:15,019 --> 00:03:17,009
Good seeing you...
73
00:03:17,008 --> 00:03:18,008
Allan.
74
00:03:18,008 --> 00:03:19,998
I know!
75
00:03:23,017 --> 00:03:25,007
[Carrie] And up
on Park Avenue,
76
00:03:25,012 --> 00:03:27,012
a different
reason for celebrating.
77
00:03:27,007 --> 00:03:28,007
So, I told him,
78
00:03:28,013 --> 00:03:30,023
when I hire a contractor
to do a job,
79
00:03:30,017 --> 00:03:31,997
I expect him
to finish on time.
80
00:03:32,006 --> 00:03:33,016
Good, honey, good!
81
00:03:33,017 --> 00:03:35,017
You know, sometimes they just
need to hear it from a man.
82
00:03:36,000 --> 00:03:38,000
A little more
mu shu, my mu shu.
83
00:03:39,001 --> 00:03:40,011
So, I saw
my doctor today
84
00:03:40,013 --> 00:03:41,023
and I told her how
frustrated we were
85
00:03:42,001 --> 00:03:43,001
that we weren't
pregnant yet.
86
00:03:43,004 --> 00:03:44,014
Mm-hmm... Wonton?
87
00:03:44,010 --> 00:03:46,010
And she said that
the easiest thing to do
88
00:03:46,013 --> 00:03:48,003
would be to
test your sperm.
89
00:03:49,023 --> 00:03:52,023
Charlotte,
I'm eating.
90
00:03:52,020 --> 00:03:55,010
Is it too much to ask
to have my mu shu
91
00:03:55,008 --> 00:03:56,008
without a side
of sperm?
92
00:03:56,016 --> 00:03:58,996
Why are you
getting so mad?
We're just talking.
93
00:03:59,002 --> 00:04:01,012
Hells bells, it's only
been three months!
94
00:04:01,012 --> 00:04:03,022
And why would you just
leap to the conclusion
95
00:04:03,023 --> 00:04:05,013
that the problem is me?
96
00:04:05,012 --> 00:04:06,022
I'm not
leaping to anything.
97
00:04:06,020 --> 00:04:09,010
It's just easier to
test the man first.
98
00:04:09,008 --> 00:04:10,018
Less invasive.
99
00:04:10,020 --> 00:04:12,010
I'm sure your
sperm is fine.
100
00:04:12,016 --> 00:04:15,006
No, it's better than fine,
it's fantastic.
101
00:04:15,009 --> 00:04:17,019
This little
subject matter
102
00:04:17,023 --> 00:04:19,013
has put me right
off my dinner.
103
00:04:19,013 --> 00:04:22,023
-Excuse me.
-Trey!
104
00:04:22,017 --> 00:04:25,007
-Honey?
-Not now!
105
00:04:30,002 --> 00:04:31,002
Do men?
106
00:04:31,006 --> 00:04:32,016
Do men what?
107
00:04:32,023 --> 00:04:34,023
Like 'em pulled?
108
00:04:34,020 --> 00:04:36,010
How would I know?
109
00:04:36,010 --> 00:04:37,020
Do you?
110
00:04:39,001 --> 00:04:40,001
Do I what?
111
00:04:40,005 --> 00:04:40,995
Like 'em pulled?
112
00:04:41,006 --> 00:04:43,006
How do I know?
113
00:04:43,013 --> 00:04:46,013
Well, why don't we give
a little tug and see?
114
00:04:46,013 --> 00:04:48,023
You wanna give
a little tug?
115
00:04:55,009 --> 00:04:57,009
Ha, ha, you're gonna
do it too hard!
116
00:04:57,011 --> 00:04:59,001
No, I won't!
117
00:04:59,003 --> 00:05:00,013
Alright.
118
00:05:04,011 --> 00:05:07,011
[phone ringing]
119
00:05:07,010 --> 00:05:10,020
You were saved by the bell.
120
00:05:10,023 --> 00:05:14,003
Bradshaw "house of pain,"
how can we hurt you?
121
00:05:14,005 --> 00:05:15,005
Hello?
122
00:05:15,012 --> 00:05:17,022
[Big]
Oh, hey, uh...
Hey man, it's me.
123
00:05:17,023 --> 00:05:20,013
I'm sorry to be, uh,
calling you this late.
124
00:05:20,010 --> 00:05:21,010
Is Carrie there?
125
00:05:21,007 --> 00:05:23,007
Yeah,
just a sec.
126
00:05:23,014 --> 00:05:24,024
Who is it?
127
00:05:25,000 --> 00:05:26,000
Hello?
128
00:05:26,004 --> 00:05:28,014
[Big] It's me, I need
to talk to you.
129
00:05:28,011 --> 00:05:30,021
Oh, well, it's really
not a good time,
130
00:05:30,022 --> 00:05:32,022
-we're about to go to bed.
-[Big] It's important.
131
00:05:32,023 --> 00:05:35,023
Willow is totally fucking
with my head, please.
132
00:05:36,001 --> 00:05:37,021
Alright.
133
00:05:38,000 --> 00:05:39,010
He's having
girlfriend problems.
134
00:05:39,016 --> 00:05:41,016
I'm gonna be
just a minute.
135
00:05:44,022 --> 00:05:46,022
[Carrie] Apparently,
dating a movie star
136
00:05:46,020 --> 00:05:49,000
makes you as crazy
as dating anyone else.
137
00:05:49,002 --> 00:05:50,012
What's the problem?
138
00:05:50,009 --> 00:05:52,009
She's in town,
she's at the Mercer.
139
00:05:52,007 --> 00:05:53,007
We were supposed to
get together tonight.
140
00:05:53,016 --> 00:05:55,006
She hasn't gotten
back to me.
141
00:05:55,007 --> 00:05:56,997
Well, did
you call her?
142
00:05:57,002 --> 00:05:58,012
Yes, I called her.
143
00:05:58,010 --> 00:06:00,020
I called all
five of her numbers.
144
00:06:00,023 --> 00:06:02,013
She never answers.
145
00:06:02,010 --> 00:06:04,010
See, here, here's
the thing, see.
146
00:06:04,011 --> 00:06:08,011
She can reach me,
but I can't ever get her.
147
00:06:08,011 --> 00:06:09,021
Maybe she never got your--
148
00:06:09,017 --> 00:06:11,007
[Big]
No, no, you don't get it.
149
00:06:11,011 --> 00:06:17,001
She can reach me,
but I can't get her ever.
150
00:06:17,002 --> 00:06:18,022
How fucked up is that?
151
00:06:19,000 --> 00:06:20,020
I don't know, very?
152
00:06:20,020 --> 00:06:23,010
I thought everything
was going great.
153
00:06:23,007 --> 00:06:25,007
It was, I mean,
I flew out to L.A.
154
00:06:25,012 --> 00:06:27,022
to take her to that
MTV award thing...
155
00:06:28,000 --> 00:06:30,010
I'd better start feeling
sorry for you soon.
156
00:06:30,013 --> 00:06:32,013
And then she
totally dissed me.
157
00:06:32,009 --> 00:06:33,999
I was following
her around
158
00:06:34,003 --> 00:06:35,023
like a goddamn dog.
159
00:06:35,018 --> 00:06:38,008
I'm just gonna be
one more minute, okay?
160
00:06:40,001 --> 00:06:42,011
Listen, to this
message she left me.
161
00:06:42,007 --> 00:06:43,017
Oh, I gotta go to bed!
162
00:06:43,020 --> 00:06:44,020
[Big]
Wait wait, listen,
163
00:06:44,023 --> 00:06:46,013
listen to this,
listen to this.
164
00:06:46,012 --> 00:06:47,022
[Willow] I miss you.
165
00:06:47,020 --> 00:06:49,020
I can't wait until
I'm in New York,
166
00:06:50,000 --> 00:06:51,020
in your arms.
167
00:06:51,021 --> 00:06:56,011
♪ I'm in a New York
State of mind ♪
168
00:06:56,008 --> 00:06:58,008
"A New York
State Of Mind"?
169
00:06:58,014 --> 00:07:01,024
It's Billy Joel,
we love that song.
170
00:07:01,023 --> 00:07:03,023
-Goodnight.
-Should I call her again?
171
00:07:03,018 --> 00:07:05,018
No, goodnight.
172
00:07:09,021 --> 00:07:11,011
I'm sorry.
173
00:07:11,011 --> 00:07:14,001
So, you still want me
to give 'em a little pull?
174
00:07:14,006 --> 00:07:15,006
Naw.
175
00:07:15,009 --> 00:07:16,019
Why'd you take
the phone in there?
176
00:07:16,019 --> 00:07:19,999
'Cause I know you don't
like him calling here, so...
177
00:07:20,004 --> 00:07:24,014
Carrie, you tell me
nothing's going on,
then nothing's going on.
178
00:07:24,013 --> 00:07:26,023
I mean, you don't
gotta run in a closet.
179
00:07:27,020 --> 00:07:29,020
Well, I didn't run,
180
00:07:29,017 --> 00:07:31,007
and I went in there
'cause I know
181
00:07:31,016 --> 00:07:33,016
how uncomfortable
it makes you.
182
00:07:33,018 --> 00:07:35,018
How uncomfortable
it makes me, or you?
183
00:07:36,001 --> 00:07:39,011
Me, yes,
I'm uncomfortable.
184
00:07:39,014 --> 00:07:41,014
I don't want you
to feel threatened.
185
00:07:41,016 --> 00:07:42,996
You think I'm
threatened by him?
186
00:07:43,002 --> 00:07:44,012
No, not "threatened."
187
00:07:44,010 --> 00:07:46,010
I could take him.
188
00:07:46,015 --> 00:07:49,005
Who said anything
about "taking him"?
189
00:07:49,012 --> 00:07:50,022
I'm just saying,
it's like the time
190
00:07:51,001 --> 00:07:52,021
Batman and the Green Hornet
got in a fight.
191
00:07:52,019 --> 00:07:54,009
Everybody expected
Batman to win
192
00:07:54,013 --> 00:07:56,023
'cause he's got the gadgets
and the cape and shit,
193
00:07:56,021 --> 00:07:58,011
but the Green Hornet
had the moves.
194
00:07:58,014 --> 00:08:01,014
See, I'm the Green Hornet,
I got the moves,
195
00:08:01,015 --> 00:08:03,005
plus, I got Pete
and he's like Kato.
196
00:08:03,014 --> 00:08:05,004
Aren't you, boy?
197
00:08:05,002 --> 00:08:07,002
Hey, Petey, come here,
boy, come here!
198
00:08:07,005 --> 00:08:08,995
Who's your buddy,
who's your buddy?
199
00:08:09,002 --> 00:08:11,012
It's Kato, it's Kato!
It's Kato, it's Kato!
200
00:08:11,010 --> 00:08:12,010
[dog barking]
201
00:08:12,015 --> 00:08:14,015
What do superheroes
have to do with it?
202
00:08:14,017 --> 00:08:16,997
I have no idea,
it's a guy thing.
203
00:08:17,002 --> 00:08:19,012
All I know is that
in order to deal with Big,
204
00:08:19,016 --> 00:08:21,016
he had to turn himself
into the Green Lantern.
205
00:08:22,000 --> 00:08:24,000
-Hornet.
-I don't care if
he's the Green "Bee."
206
00:08:24,004 --> 00:08:27,014
I just wish there was
a way for Aidan
207
00:08:27,009 --> 00:08:29,009
to really understand
that he has nothing
208
00:08:29,014 --> 00:08:31,014
to worry about.
209
00:08:31,011 --> 00:08:34,001
Maybe I should try
to get Big and him
210
00:08:34,002 --> 00:08:35,002
and me together.
211
00:08:35,005 --> 00:08:36,005
Did you have a big plate
of crazy for lunch?
212
00:08:36,014 --> 00:08:38,014
We could all talk
and Aidan could see
213
00:08:38,016 --> 00:08:40,996
once and for all
that I love him,
214
00:08:41,004 --> 00:08:43,014
and Big and I
are just friends.
215
00:08:43,010 --> 00:08:44,020
Carrie,
I don't know.
216
00:08:44,023 --> 00:08:47,013
Seriously.
Keeping my relationship
with Big in the closet
217
00:08:47,015 --> 00:08:48,995
only makes
things worse.
218
00:08:49,002 --> 00:08:51,012
These are guys,
they don't talk, they fight.
219
00:08:51,012 --> 00:08:53,022
They can't help it, it's
all that crazy testosterone.
220
00:08:53,021 --> 00:08:55,011
God bless it.
221
00:08:55,014 --> 00:08:58,014
We're having
Trey's sperm tested.
222
00:08:58,015 --> 00:09:00,015
Is it not doing
well in school?
223
00:09:00,021 --> 00:09:03,001
We were discussing it
over dinner last night,
224
00:09:03,004 --> 00:09:04,024
and he just blew up.
225
00:09:04,021 --> 00:09:06,011
One minute he was
perfectly happy,
226
00:09:06,011 --> 00:09:08,011
the next minute,
furious.
227
00:09:08,008 --> 00:09:09,008
That time of
the month?
228
00:09:09,012 --> 00:09:11,012
It's a side of Trey
I've never seen.
229
00:09:11,016 --> 00:09:13,016
It's about the sperm.
230
00:09:13,018 --> 00:09:14,998
What is it
with that area?
231
00:09:15,006 --> 00:09:16,006
It's like
a minefield.
232
00:09:16,013 --> 00:09:18,023
[Carrie] I spent the afternoon
thinking about my friends.
233
00:09:18,020 --> 00:09:22,020
Body image depression,
unpredictable mood swings,
234
00:09:22,017 --> 00:09:24,007
late night
phone calls
235
00:09:24,013 --> 00:09:26,003
obsessing
about a relationship.
236
00:09:26,004 --> 00:09:28,014
Did I mention these
are my male friends?
237
00:09:28,014 --> 00:09:31,014
So, maybe men and women aren't
from different planets
238
00:09:31,015 --> 00:09:33,005
as pop culture would
have us believe.
239
00:09:33,014 --> 00:09:35,024
Maybe we live a lot
closer to each other.
240
00:09:35,017 --> 00:09:37,017
Perhaps,
dare I even say it,
241
00:09:37,017 --> 00:09:39,017
in the same zip code?
242
00:09:39,021 --> 00:09:41,011
In view of current
circumstances,
243
00:09:41,016 --> 00:09:43,006
I couldn't
help but wonder,
244
00:09:43,009 --> 00:09:45,999
are men just
women with balls?
245
00:09:46,002 --> 00:09:47,002
[Steve]
Look at that.
246
00:09:47,002 --> 00:09:49,012
-[Miranda] Look at what?
-[Steve] That dog's sack!
247
00:09:49,007 --> 00:09:51,007
No, thank you.
248
00:09:52,022 --> 00:09:55,002
Did you know you can't
enter a dog in a dog show
249
00:09:55,002 --> 00:09:56,012
if he's only
got one ball?
250
00:09:56,013 --> 00:09:58,013
Where'd you
hear that?
251
00:09:58,014 --> 00:10:00,014
Around.
252
00:10:01,018 --> 00:10:04,008
They even make
fake dog balls.
253
00:10:06,022 --> 00:10:09,012
They make 'em
for humans, too.
254
00:10:11,017 --> 00:10:12,997
I'm thinking
about getting one.
255
00:10:13,005 --> 00:10:15,005
No, Steve, no,
why would you do that?
256
00:10:15,013 --> 00:10:17,013
Why not, women get
breast implants all the time.
257
00:10:17,008 --> 00:10:20,008
Steve, trust me,
I've been to the "area"
258
00:10:20,012 --> 00:10:21,012
and I swear to God,
259
00:10:21,016 --> 00:10:24,006
I wouldn't know
if you had one or four.
260
00:10:24,010 --> 00:10:26,010
But I know.
261
00:10:26,008 --> 00:10:28,008
Every time I look
down at my nuts,
262
00:10:28,009 --> 00:10:30,019
correction, nut...
263
00:10:32,010 --> 00:10:33,010
I look all lopsided.
264
00:10:33,014 --> 00:10:35,024
Women don't care!
265
00:10:35,019 --> 00:10:38,019
We care about
nice arms,
266
00:10:38,018 --> 00:10:40,018
great eyes,
big dick.
267
00:10:41,001 --> 00:10:43,001
I have never once
heard a woman say,
268
00:10:43,005 --> 00:10:46,005
"he had such
a big, full scrotum!"
269
00:10:47,015 --> 00:10:48,015
I made an
appointment,
270
00:10:48,022 --> 00:10:50,002
I'm talking
to the doctor.
271
00:10:50,006 --> 00:10:51,016
Will you go
with me?
272
00:10:52,001 --> 00:10:54,001
Where, testicle
shopping?
273
00:10:55,016 --> 00:10:56,016
[groans]
274
00:10:56,020 --> 00:10:58,020
[Carrie] Samantha finally
got her meeting
275
00:10:58,018 --> 00:11:01,008
with hotel magnate,
Richard Wright.
276
00:11:01,011 --> 00:11:04,021
Smart, tough,
a real ball buster.
277
00:11:04,018 --> 00:11:05,998
Well, I've enjoyed
meeting you,
278
00:11:06,003 --> 00:11:07,023
but truth be told,
Ms. Jones,
279
00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:10,000
your resume's
all fluff.
280
00:11:10,004 --> 00:11:11,014
Fluff?
281
00:11:11,008 --> 00:11:12,998
It's just parties
and social events.
282
00:11:13,003 --> 00:11:16,003
Well, what is it that
you do in your hotels,
283
00:11:16,005 --> 00:11:17,005
nuclear fission?
284
00:11:20,021 --> 00:11:22,001
[intercom beeping]
285
00:11:24,002 --> 00:11:26,012
I admit,
I'm intrigued.
286
00:11:26,012 --> 00:11:28,012
If I wasn't, you woulda
been down in the lobby
287
00:11:28,016 --> 00:11:30,006
having a cappuccino
ten minutes ago.
288
00:11:31,019 --> 00:11:33,009
Here's an idea.
289
00:11:33,010 --> 00:11:34,010
I'm talking
to Brad Rosen.
290
00:11:34,016 --> 00:11:37,006
Maybe you two can get
together and share the work.
291
00:11:37,009 --> 00:11:39,009
Five hotels,
it's a big job.
292
00:11:39,016 --> 00:11:40,016
I know it's a big job,
293
00:11:41,001 --> 00:11:43,021
that's why I'm still here
and not down in the lobby
294
00:11:43,023 --> 00:11:45,023
having a cappuccino.
295
00:11:45,018 --> 00:11:47,018
I appreciate
your offer, but...
296
00:11:47,023 --> 00:11:49,023
I don't need
a partner.
297
00:11:49,022 --> 00:11:53,012
Read between
the lines, Ms. Jones.
298
00:11:53,014 --> 00:11:56,024
I deal with a lot
of business... "men."
299
00:11:57,021 --> 00:11:59,011
What are you saying?
300
00:11:59,009 --> 00:12:02,019
That business "men" would
be more comfortable
301
00:12:02,021 --> 00:12:04,001
dealing with a woman
302
00:12:04,004 --> 00:12:05,024
if she were working
next to a man?
303
00:12:06,000 --> 00:12:07,020
You have
a lot to offer.
304
00:12:07,018 --> 00:12:09,018
You might want to consider
working with a partner
305
00:12:09,023 --> 00:12:11,023
who isn't so...
306
00:12:11,018 --> 00:12:13,018
emotional.
307
00:12:13,022 --> 00:12:15,022
"Emotional"
is just code for
308
00:12:15,019 --> 00:12:17,009
"I don't want
to hire a woman."
309
00:12:17,010 --> 00:12:19,010
Exactly.
They're that way
at my firm, too.
310
00:12:19,015 --> 00:12:21,005
They think you're gonna
cry over a legal brief.
311
00:12:21,009 --> 00:12:22,999
Well, have you ever
cried over a brief?
312
00:12:23,003 --> 00:12:25,013
Certainly, but only
in the privacy of
my own office.
313
00:12:25,007 --> 00:12:26,017
I cried once
at the gallery,
314
00:12:26,020 --> 00:12:28,020
once, in ten years,
315
00:12:28,017 --> 00:12:29,017
and from that
day on it was,
316
00:12:29,023 --> 00:12:32,003
"Careful, don't
make Charlotte cry."
317
00:12:32,006 --> 00:12:33,016
I have never
cried at work.
318
00:12:33,021 --> 00:12:36,011
I fake cried to my editor
when I missed a deadline.
319
00:12:36,010 --> 00:12:38,020
I told him I was having
a bad time at home,
320
00:12:38,023 --> 00:12:40,003
but really,
321
00:12:40,005 --> 00:12:41,005
I was having a good time
in the Hamptons.
322
00:12:41,016 --> 00:12:43,996
Well, that makes
the rest of us look bad.
323
00:12:44,003 --> 00:12:45,023
Oh, boo-hoo,
it was 80 degrees and sunny.
324
00:12:45,018 --> 00:12:47,008
A guy gets angry
in a meeting,
325
00:12:47,007 --> 00:12:49,007
he's a pistol,
a woman, she's emotional.
326
00:12:49,013 --> 00:12:50,023
If I'd say
anything, like,
327
00:12:50,020 --> 00:12:52,010
"I don't think that's
hung high enough,"
328
00:12:52,012 --> 00:12:53,022
they'd say,
"Ooh, careful,
329
00:12:53,021 --> 00:12:54,021
don't make
Charlotte cry"!
330
00:12:55,000 --> 00:12:56,020
What does he think
I'm going to do,
331
00:12:56,020 --> 00:12:58,010
get my period and
ruin his empire?
332
00:12:58,012 --> 00:12:59,022
Yes, men,
333
00:12:59,019 --> 00:13:02,009
wait, let me rephrase that,
some men--
334
00:13:02,012 --> 00:13:04,012
Good move, counsel.
That will look much better
335
00:13:04,009 --> 00:13:06,009
on the court transcripts
of this dinner.
336
00:13:06,007 --> 00:13:08,017
Some men are threatened
by strong businesswomen
337
00:13:08,021 --> 00:13:10,001
and they have to find a way
338
00:13:10,006 --> 00:13:11,016
to make her be
just a woman again.
339
00:13:11,021 --> 00:13:13,011
Hence, you're
too emotional.
340
00:13:13,010 --> 00:13:14,020
"Hence," yet.
341
00:13:14,020 --> 00:13:16,010
Well, I'm going
back in there,
342
00:13:16,009 --> 00:13:17,999
guns blazing, cool,
calm, collected.
343
00:13:18,003 --> 00:13:20,023
I'm going to impress that
arrogant motherfucker so much,
344
00:13:21,000 --> 00:13:23,000
he's gonna beg me
to take the job.
345
00:13:23,003 --> 00:13:24,003
Just don't cry.
346
00:13:24,006 --> 00:13:25,016
Once, once
in ten years!
347
00:13:25,017 --> 00:13:26,017
Well, this
chickie's gotta run
348
00:13:27,000 --> 00:13:28,010
or I'm gonna miss
my ride with Aidan,
349
00:13:28,007 --> 00:13:29,997
and then I'm gonna have to take
mass transit to the country.
350
00:13:30,005 --> 00:13:31,015
Then there'll be
some tears.
351
00:13:31,018 --> 00:13:32,018
The next day,
352
00:13:32,022 --> 00:13:35,012
while Aidan was
tearing down the old shed,
353
00:13:35,007 --> 00:13:36,017
I was tearing through
the new InStyle
354
00:13:37,000 --> 00:13:39,020
with Big's big movie star
on the cover.
355
00:13:40,019 --> 00:13:42,009
[phone ringing]
356
00:13:44,016 --> 00:13:45,016
Hello?
357
00:13:45,018 --> 00:13:47,008
Hey, it's me.
358
00:13:47,015 --> 00:13:49,005
What's the matter?
You sound terrible.
359
00:13:49,014 --> 00:13:50,024
I hope you don't
mind my calling.
360
00:13:50,021 --> 00:13:52,011
I got the number
off your machine.
361
00:13:52,014 --> 00:13:54,014
Where's area code 8-4-5?
362
00:13:54,011 --> 00:13:56,011
Upstate,
we're in the country.
363
00:13:56,013 --> 00:13:57,023
On a Thursday?
364
00:13:57,018 --> 00:14:00,008
We're taking
a long weekend,
what's wrong?
365
00:14:02,005 --> 00:14:03,995
She broke it off.
366
00:14:04,002 --> 00:14:06,022
She said she never
wants to see me again.
367
00:14:06,023 --> 00:14:09,023
Oh, I'm so sorry.
368
00:14:09,023 --> 00:14:11,013
[Big] I don't even
know what I did.
369
00:14:11,016 --> 00:14:13,006
She won't
return my calls.
370
00:14:13,015 --> 00:14:16,995
See, see,
she can reach me,
371
00:14:17,004 --> 00:14:18,014
but I can't get her.
372
00:14:18,012 --> 00:14:20,012
You mentioned that.
373
00:14:22,003 --> 00:14:23,023
Well...
374
00:14:23,023 --> 00:14:25,023
She's crazy,
I'm telling you.
375
00:14:25,019 --> 00:14:27,009
She has the eyes
of a crazy person.
376
00:14:27,010 --> 00:14:30,000
Man, I was such a chump.
377
00:14:30,002 --> 00:14:32,022
I really put
myself out there
378
00:14:32,018 --> 00:14:34,998
and she drop-kicked me
379
00:14:35,002 --> 00:14:36,022
right in
the fuckin' heart.
380
00:14:39,005 --> 00:14:40,015
When are you coming
back to the city?
381
00:14:40,021 --> 00:14:41,021
Monday.
382
00:14:41,018 --> 00:14:42,998
Not 'til Monday?
383
00:14:46,023 --> 00:14:48,003
Fuck.
384
00:14:51,003 --> 00:14:53,023
Well, I would,
385
00:14:53,022 --> 00:14:56,022
I'd invite you out here,
but it's just so far away.
386
00:14:56,019 --> 00:14:58,009
How far?
387
00:14:58,008 --> 00:15:01,008
It's 40 minutes, you know,
if there's no traffic,
388
00:15:01,009 --> 00:15:03,019
but with the weekenders
and everything, I don't know.
389
00:15:04,000 --> 00:15:05,020
An hour,
maybe even two.
390
00:15:05,019 --> 00:15:06,019
It's Thursday afternoon.
391
00:15:06,021 --> 00:15:08,011
Yeah, don't you
have to work?
392
00:15:08,008 --> 00:15:09,018
[Big]
I have to see you.
393
00:15:09,020 --> 00:15:11,020
I'll get my jag
out of the garage.
394
00:15:11,020 --> 00:15:13,000
Maybe the drive
will do me good.
395
00:15:13,006 --> 00:15:14,006
Uh-huh.
396
00:15:14,007 --> 00:15:15,997
[Big] I'll come up for
an hour, we'll talk,
397
00:15:16,006 --> 00:15:17,006
and then
I'll head home.
398
00:15:17,013 --> 00:15:18,023
Uh-huh.
399
00:15:18,017 --> 00:15:20,997
How do I get there?
Let me get a pen.
400
00:15:27,006 --> 00:15:28,016
[Pete barking]
401
00:15:31,013 --> 00:15:32,023
Hey darlin'.
402
00:15:32,021 --> 00:15:34,021
We gotta close
these windows up,
403
00:15:34,022 --> 00:15:36,022
it's gonna rain.
404
00:15:37,001 --> 00:15:38,011
Did I hear
the phone ring?
405
00:15:38,014 --> 00:15:39,024
Uh-huh.
406
00:15:41,017 --> 00:15:43,007
Who was it?
407
00:15:43,009 --> 00:15:44,009
It was Batman.
408
00:15:45,018 --> 00:15:47,008
I invited him up.
409
00:15:49,008 --> 00:15:51,008
I didn't mean to, I...
410
00:15:51,015 --> 00:15:52,995
I just got trapped.
411
00:15:53,005 --> 00:15:56,015
That crazy movie star
lady broke up with him,
412
00:15:56,017 --> 00:15:57,017
he's devastated,
413
00:15:57,017 --> 00:15:58,997
he has no one
else to talk to.
414
00:15:59,004 --> 00:16:00,024
And before I knew it,
I was telling him
415
00:16:00,017 --> 00:16:03,997
to make a right at the sign
for farm fresh summer squash.
416
00:16:04,003 --> 00:16:05,013
I don't want him
in my house.
417
00:16:05,010 --> 00:16:06,020
I totally understand.
418
00:16:07,001 --> 00:16:08,011
Look, he's gonna
come up here
419
00:16:08,015 --> 00:16:09,015
and we're gonna
have a quick talk,
420
00:16:09,019 --> 00:16:11,009
and then he is gonna
go right back to the city
421
00:16:11,012 --> 00:16:13,012
where he belongs.
422
00:16:13,007 --> 00:16:14,017
Oh, fuck!
423
00:16:16,001 --> 00:16:17,011
Hey.
424
00:16:17,011 --> 00:16:19,011
You're my man.
425
00:16:19,015 --> 00:16:21,005
And I love you.
426
00:16:23,007 --> 00:16:25,017
He's just
a friend in pain.
427
00:16:26,023 --> 00:16:29,023
I would never do this,
but he's really hurting.
428
00:16:29,018 --> 00:16:32,008
Come on, haven't you ever
had a girl break your--
429
00:16:33,017 --> 00:16:36,007
[thunder rumbling]
430
00:16:36,014 --> 00:16:38,024
Well, he better
be fucking upset
431
00:16:38,022 --> 00:16:41,002
when he gets here,
there better be tears.
432
00:16:41,002 --> 00:16:43,012
Thank you.
433
00:16:45,022 --> 00:16:47,022
Let's go, Pete.
434
00:16:49,010 --> 00:16:52,000
He's got some balls
coming up here.
435
00:16:54,013 --> 00:16:55,023
[Dr. Manuel] The prosthesis
approximates
436
00:16:55,017 --> 00:16:58,017
the weight, shape, and feel
of a normal testicle.
437
00:16:58,020 --> 00:16:59,020
Squeeze it.
438
00:17:04,023 --> 00:17:08,003
Oh, I'm sorry.
439
00:17:08,002 --> 00:17:10,012
I dropped the ball.
440
00:17:10,014 --> 00:17:13,024
[laughs]
441
00:17:13,020 --> 00:17:15,020
Now, it comes
in four sizes.
442
00:17:15,021 --> 00:17:18,021
Extra small, small,
medium, and large.
443
00:17:19,022 --> 00:17:22,012
I'd be a...
444
00:17:22,011 --> 00:17:26,021
Jeez, Miranda,
what would I be?
445
00:17:28,006 --> 00:17:31,016
Umm...
Medium?
446
00:17:31,017 --> 00:17:34,017
Yeah?
I was thinking large.
447
00:17:34,022 --> 00:17:37,002
Well, I'm really
not an expert.
448
00:17:38,001 --> 00:17:39,011
Large, then.
449
00:17:41,001 --> 00:17:44,001
Medium...
Really?
450
00:17:44,005 --> 00:17:46,005
A large-medium, Steve.
451
00:17:46,008 --> 00:17:47,018
Now, to get
this model,
452
00:17:47,017 --> 00:17:49,017
you have to enroll
in a clinical trial
453
00:17:49,020 --> 00:17:50,020
for market clearance.
454
00:17:50,020 --> 00:17:52,010
Excuse me?
455
00:17:52,015 --> 00:17:53,015
It's not
approved yet.
456
00:17:53,020 --> 00:17:55,010
It's still being
tested for safety.
457
00:17:55,008 --> 00:17:57,008
No, Steve...
458
00:17:58,001 --> 00:17:58,021
No.
459
00:17:59,001 --> 00:18:01,021
I assure you,
it's perfectly safe.
460
00:18:02,000 --> 00:18:03,020
He says
it's perfectly safe.
461
00:18:04,000 --> 00:18:06,010
That's what they said
about the Ford Pinto.
462
00:18:06,007 --> 00:18:07,997
Think about it, Steve.
463
00:18:08,002 --> 00:18:09,022
You want a Pinto
near your penis?
464
00:18:15,022 --> 00:18:18,012
[Carrie] And in a different
urologist's office
465
00:18:18,009 --> 00:18:20,009
at the exact same time...
466
00:18:20,012 --> 00:18:21,022
[knocking]
467
00:18:22,008 --> 00:18:23,018
Hi!
468
00:18:23,022 --> 00:18:27,002
Is everything okay?
The nurse said
you wanted to see me.
469
00:18:27,004 --> 00:18:30,004
I'm afraid our old problem
has reared its ugly head.
470
00:18:30,002 --> 00:18:32,022
I can't seem to
rise to the occasion.
471
00:18:32,021 --> 00:18:35,001
Well, let's not assume
it's the same problem.
472
00:18:35,005 --> 00:18:38,015
Here, I bought
you this.
473
00:18:38,021 --> 00:18:39,021
Juggs?
474
00:18:39,022 --> 00:18:41,012
I know how much
you like them.
475
00:18:41,007 --> 00:18:43,007
[laughs] You knew I'd
have a problem.
476
00:18:43,014 --> 00:18:46,004
No, no, I just
came prepared.
477
00:18:46,020 --> 00:18:48,010
Look,
478
00:18:49,000 --> 00:18:50,020
she's got big boobs.
479
00:18:52,007 --> 00:18:53,997
Look, so does she.
480
00:18:54,006 --> 00:18:55,996
It's the big boob
bonanza issue!
481
00:18:56,003 --> 00:18:57,023
It's not that, it's...
482
00:18:57,022 --> 00:18:59,022
What, honey?
483
00:19:00,019 --> 00:19:01,019
I'm afraid to.
484
00:19:01,023 --> 00:19:04,013
I don't think I can handle
another problem
485
00:19:04,016 --> 00:19:05,996
-in that area.
-Oh...
486
00:19:09,015 --> 00:19:11,995
Don't you worry,
Trey MacDougal,
487
00:19:12,006 --> 00:19:17,006
I'm sure that you have
very strong Scottish sperm.
488
00:19:17,007 --> 00:19:20,017
And if you don't,
we can just,
489
00:19:20,022 --> 00:19:24,012
spin them,
and whip them up,
490
00:19:24,007 --> 00:19:26,017
and do whatever it is
you sexy doctor types do.
491
00:19:27,000 --> 00:19:28,020
Mmm, that's good.
492
00:19:28,018 --> 00:19:30,018
-Yeah?
-Mm-hmm.
493
00:19:30,019 --> 00:19:33,019
-Oh, yeah, keep doing that.
-Mm-hmm.
494
00:19:36,002 --> 00:19:37,022
Do that
thing I like.
495
00:19:37,017 --> 00:19:38,997
Which thing?
496
00:19:39,004 --> 00:19:41,024
You know,
give a little tug.
497
00:19:42,000 --> 00:19:45,020
[Carrie] Turned out,
Trey's Scottish sperm was fine,
498
00:19:45,020 --> 00:19:48,000
no, better than fine,
fantastic.
499
00:19:48,005 --> 00:19:49,005
Where's the cup?
500
00:19:49,016 --> 00:19:52,016
Well, I have to admit,
you're the best
person for the job,
501
00:19:52,021 --> 00:19:54,021
but I'm not
gonna hire you.
502
00:19:56,003 --> 00:19:59,003
Give me one legitimate
reason why not.
503
00:19:59,002 --> 00:20:00,022
Do I have
to say it?
504
00:20:00,022 --> 00:20:01,022
Yes.
505
00:20:02,000 --> 00:20:05,000
I'd like to hear the words
come out of your mouth.
506
00:20:05,004 --> 00:20:08,004
Okay, you slept
with my architect.
507
00:20:08,002 --> 00:20:10,012
[Carrie] Turns out,
Samantha was wrong,
508
00:20:10,010 --> 00:20:11,020
men do talk.
509
00:20:11,018 --> 00:20:12,998
And I don't wanna
get into all that.
510
00:20:13,005 --> 00:20:15,015
Into all what?
511
00:20:16,001 --> 00:20:18,001
It happened
a hundred years ago!
512
00:20:18,002 --> 00:20:20,012
I barely know the guy!
513
00:20:20,009 --> 00:20:23,009
And how does
my personal life
affect your business?
514
00:20:23,009 --> 00:20:25,009
I think the more accurate
question would be,
515
00:20:25,014 --> 00:20:28,014
how does your personal life
affect your business?
516
00:20:29,015 --> 00:20:30,995
It's too bad.
517
00:20:31,002 --> 00:20:33,012
Other than that,
you had the job.
518
00:20:37,012 --> 00:20:38,012
You know what?
519
00:20:39,008 --> 00:20:40,018
If I was a guy,
520
00:20:41,000 --> 00:20:42,010
you would have
shaken my hand,
521
00:20:42,016 --> 00:20:45,006
bought me a scotch and
given me a key to an office.
522
00:20:45,013 --> 00:20:46,013
It's amazing.
523
00:20:46,015 --> 00:20:48,005
A man with such
innovative vision
524
00:20:48,008 --> 00:20:50,008
can be so
short-sighted.
525
00:20:53,004 --> 00:20:54,024
Ms. Jones, wait.
526
00:20:54,017 --> 00:20:55,997
[Carrie] But Samantha
couldn't wait.
527
00:20:56,003 --> 00:20:58,013
She could feel the tears
building up inside her.
528
00:20:58,009 --> 00:20:59,019
Come on,
come on!
529
00:20:59,018 --> 00:21:01,018
[Richard] Wait,
not so fast!
530
00:21:01,018 --> 00:21:04,008
-Close... close!
-[Richard] Ms. Jones!
531
00:21:07,021 --> 00:21:11,011
[Carrie] The next day,
Richard Wright hired Samantha.
532
00:21:11,007 --> 00:21:14,007
He told her
he admired her balls.
533
00:21:16,010 --> 00:21:18,020
When Big still hadn't arrived
two hours later,
534
00:21:19,000 --> 00:21:21,020
I was secretly praying
he had missed the sign
535
00:21:21,017 --> 00:21:25,007
for farm fresh
summer squash.
536
00:21:25,013 --> 00:21:28,013
Then, there it was,
the Batmobile.
537
00:21:28,014 --> 00:21:30,024
[thunder rumbling]
538
00:21:37,023 --> 00:21:39,023
[horn honking]
539
00:21:41,004 --> 00:21:43,024
Maybe he doesn't wanna
come in and meet your dad.
540
00:21:49,013 --> 00:21:52,003
[on radio]
♪ I'm takin' a greyhound ♪
541
00:21:52,003 --> 00:21:55,013
♪ on the Hudson River line ♪
542
00:21:57,002 --> 00:22:01,012
♪ I'm in a New York
State of mind ♪
543
00:22:02,010 --> 00:22:04,010
What are you doing
just sitting here?
544
00:22:04,015 --> 00:22:06,005
Waiting for you.
545
00:22:07,015 --> 00:22:09,015
Why didn't you
come in?
546
00:22:11,021 --> 00:22:13,021
I don't wanna go in.
547
00:22:13,018 --> 00:22:15,018
Let's go have
a drink or something.
548
00:22:16,001 --> 00:22:17,011
Wanna get
a drink, where?
549
00:22:17,015 --> 00:22:20,015
At "ye old country
lemonade stand?"
550
00:22:21,001 --> 00:22:23,011
[music continues]
551
00:22:23,016 --> 00:22:26,016
Why are you
listening to that?
552
00:22:26,018 --> 00:22:30,018
[music continues]
553
00:22:30,022 --> 00:22:33,002
Come on, turn off the car
and come inside.
554
00:22:33,002 --> 00:22:34,022
We'll talk, alright?
555
00:22:34,020 --> 00:22:37,010
♪ I'm in a New York
State of mind ♪
556
00:22:37,016 --> 00:22:38,016
[music stops]
557
00:22:44,016 --> 00:22:45,016
Is he in there?
558
00:22:45,022 --> 00:22:47,012
Yes.
559
00:22:47,013 --> 00:22:49,013
I can't talk about
this in front of him.
560
00:22:49,015 --> 00:22:53,005
Yes, you can,
and you better.
561
00:22:53,010 --> 00:22:55,020
So, come on,
let's go.
562
00:22:55,017 --> 00:22:57,017
Come on.
563
00:22:58,001 --> 00:22:59,021
Oh, shit.
564
00:23:01,008 --> 00:23:03,998
An hour and two bottles
of red wine later,
565
00:23:04,006 --> 00:23:05,016
Big started talking.
566
00:23:05,022 --> 00:23:08,002
Unfortunately,
it was mostly to himself.
567
00:23:08,005 --> 00:23:10,005
"Her luminous skin,
568
00:23:10,015 --> 00:23:14,005
a product of
vegan diet discipline."
569
00:23:14,016 --> 00:23:17,996
Vegan diet, bullshit.
570
00:23:18,006 --> 00:23:19,006
Alright, give me
the magazine.
571
00:23:19,014 --> 00:23:21,014
No, wait, wait, wait,
listen to this one.
572
00:23:21,016 --> 00:23:24,996
"I'm looking for
that someone special."
573
00:23:25,006 --> 00:23:28,016
She's not looking
for anybody, bullshit.
574
00:23:30,013 --> 00:23:31,023
Any more wine?
575
00:23:32,000 --> 00:23:33,020
Nope.
576
00:23:40,004 --> 00:23:43,014
"Let's go have a drink
and a smoke sometime."
577
00:23:45,010 --> 00:23:47,000
You can't smoke
in the house.
578
00:23:47,002 --> 00:23:48,012
Huh?
579
00:23:48,015 --> 00:23:51,015
You can't smoke
in the house.
580
00:23:51,019 --> 00:23:54,019
That's cool.
581
00:23:54,020 --> 00:23:56,020
Guess I better
head back.
582
00:23:59,008 --> 00:24:00,018
Thanks.
583
00:24:04,019 --> 00:24:06,019
Oh, Jesus.
584
00:24:06,017 --> 00:24:09,007
Look at him,
he can't drive.
585
00:24:18,019 --> 00:24:20,009
Hey, what do you
think you're doing?
586
00:24:20,007 --> 00:24:21,007
You can't drive.
587
00:24:21,015 --> 00:24:22,005
Call my driver.
588
00:24:22,015 --> 00:24:24,015
We're an hour
outside New York.
589
00:24:24,018 --> 00:24:27,018
♪ I'm in a New York
State of mind ♪
590
00:24:28,000 --> 00:24:30,010
♪ Seen all
The movie stars ♪
591
00:24:30,012 --> 00:24:32,012
Alright, you're gonna have to
sleep on the couch.
592
00:24:32,007 --> 00:24:33,017
I better not.
593
00:24:33,019 --> 00:24:35,999
He doesn't
want me here.
594
00:24:39,020 --> 00:24:43,000
You can't drive,
sleep on the couch.
595
00:24:45,019 --> 00:24:47,019
That's cool.
596
00:24:49,019 --> 00:24:51,019
[Carrie] After the ball plan
backfired,
597
00:24:51,019 --> 00:24:54,999
Miranda took Steve out to
dinner to lift his spirits.
598
00:24:55,002 --> 00:24:57,002
Here's the book
I was telling you about,
599
00:24:57,004 --> 00:25:00,004
A Positive
Outlook To Healing.
600
00:25:03,005 --> 00:25:05,005
Steve, I'm starting
to hit my limit.
601
00:25:05,008 --> 00:25:08,008
I know, um,
I just,
602
00:25:08,014 --> 00:25:13,014
I was just really
counting on that fake ball.
603
00:25:13,014 --> 00:25:17,014
It's just, every time
I look down there,
I feel...
604
00:25:17,009 --> 00:25:19,009
What?
605
00:25:19,016 --> 00:25:22,016
This may be hard
for you to understand,
606
00:25:22,017 --> 00:25:25,017
um...
607
00:25:25,020 --> 00:25:28,020
But who's gonna fuck
a uni-ball bartender?
608
00:25:36,004 --> 00:25:39,024
[Carrie] Miranda realized
the one thing she could do to
help Steve
609
00:25:39,022 --> 00:25:42,012
didn't involve
books or balls.
610
00:25:46,001 --> 00:25:49,011
[ball bouncing]
611
00:26:01,017 --> 00:26:04,017
[bouncing continues]
612
00:26:09,023 --> 00:26:12,003
[groaning]
613
00:26:16,021 --> 00:26:18,021
What's that
pounding?
614
00:26:18,020 --> 00:26:20,020
Aidan's shooting hoops.
615
00:26:23,014 --> 00:26:26,004
Isn't it
a little early?
616
00:26:26,006 --> 00:26:28,016
You have to go out there
and make friends with him.
617
00:26:31,014 --> 00:26:33,004
[sighs]
618
00:26:34,009 --> 00:26:36,009
What are you
talking about?
619
00:26:39,010 --> 00:26:41,010
We're middle-aged men,
we don't make friends.
620
00:26:41,012 --> 00:26:42,012
We have
nothing in common.
621
00:26:42,016 --> 00:26:43,996
You have me
in common.
622
00:26:44,002 --> 00:26:46,012
And if you and Aidan
don't become at least
a little friendly,
623
00:26:46,015 --> 00:26:48,015
I'm not gonna be able
to stay in your life.
624
00:26:55,019 --> 00:26:58,009
Well, how do
I do this?
625
00:26:59,020 --> 00:27:01,010
You're a guy,
he's a guy,
626
00:27:01,012 --> 00:27:04,012
there's a ball,
figure it out.
627
00:27:28,023 --> 00:27:30,023
Hey, man.
628
00:27:31,022 --> 00:27:33,022
I'm sorry about
last night,
629
00:27:33,022 --> 00:27:36,022
I guess I got
a little drunk.
630
00:27:36,018 --> 00:27:40,008
I didn't mean to come up
and ruin your weekend
or anything.
631
00:27:43,014 --> 00:27:45,004
You play
hoop, huh?
632
00:27:45,002 --> 00:27:48,022
Here, why don't you
give me a shot?
I play a little.
633
00:27:53,015 --> 00:27:55,995
A little muddy,
I guess all that rain, huh?
634
00:28:06,012 --> 00:28:08,012
Watch it, man,
that was a little hard.
635
00:28:08,007 --> 00:28:10,007
That wasn't
that hard.
636
00:28:14,005 --> 00:28:15,005
[grunting]
637
00:28:19,004 --> 00:28:21,004
[Pete barking]
638
00:28:25,002 --> 00:28:27,002
[Aidan and Big grunting]
639
00:28:27,004 --> 00:28:28,004
[Carrie] There they were.
640
00:28:28,004 --> 00:28:30,014
Batman and
the Green "Bee."
641
00:28:31,004 --> 00:28:33,024
Hey! Stop!
642
00:28:34,015 --> 00:28:36,005
Stop it!
643
00:28:37,003 --> 00:28:39,003
[both grunting]
644
00:28:39,005 --> 00:28:42,005
Stop it!
You're middle-aged!
645
00:28:45,009 --> 00:28:46,999
-[Pete growling]
-[Big] Ow!
646
00:28:47,002 --> 00:28:49,012
That dog
just bit my ass!
647
00:28:49,010 --> 00:28:50,010
Pete!
648
00:28:50,009 --> 00:28:51,999
[Carrie] And just like that,
649
00:28:52,002 --> 00:28:53,022
Kato stopped the fight.
650
00:29:04,013 --> 00:29:06,023
And the thing is, see,
651
00:29:06,022 --> 00:29:12,012
she could reach me,
but I could never get her.
652
00:29:13,005 --> 00:29:15,995
Day or night,
whenever,
653
00:29:16,002 --> 00:29:18,002
she could
reach me,
654
00:29:18,002 --> 00:29:20,002
I couldn't
get her.
655
00:29:20,004 --> 00:29:21,014
See?
656
00:29:21,014 --> 00:29:24,024
-That's fucked up.
-Yeah, yeah.
657
00:29:24,019 --> 00:29:26,019
[Carrie] Somehow,
the storm had passed
658
00:29:27,001 --> 00:29:30,011
and I never fully
understood why.
659
00:29:30,010 --> 00:29:34,010
Okay, maybe men and women don't
live in the same zip code,
660
00:29:34,011 --> 00:29:36,021
but we're moving closer.
661
00:29:36,021 --> 00:29:38,021
-Good eggs.
-[Aidan] Mmm.