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00:00:59,667 --> 00:01:01,707
[Carrie] There is nothing more
humiliating for a woman
2
00:01:01,792 --> 00:01:03,882
than a visit
to the gynecologist.
3
00:01:04,291 --> 00:01:05,881
Do you need more Ortho-Novum?
4
00:01:05,959 --> 00:01:08,579
[Carrie] Unless it's having
to tell your gynecologist
5
00:01:08,667 --> 00:01:10,787
that you don't need to be
on the pill anymore.
6
00:01:10,875 --> 00:01:13,075
Actually, I'm going off it.
7
00:01:13,166 --> 00:01:16,126
-Are you trying to have a baby?
-No!
8
00:01:16,458 --> 00:01:17,628
No, I...
9
00:01:17,959 --> 00:01:19,539
guess I sort of jumped the gun
10
00:01:19,625 --> 00:01:22,285
going on it in the first place,
because Steve...
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00:01:22,542 --> 00:01:24,422
the guy that I went on it for,
12
00:01:24,500 --> 00:01:28,000
the first real relationship
I've had in years, is over
and...
13
00:01:28,333 --> 00:01:31,293
I don't need a daily reminder
that I'm not having sex.
14
00:01:31,375 --> 00:01:32,455
So...
15
00:01:32,542 --> 00:01:34,712
that's the story with the pill.
And, uh...
16
00:01:35,166 --> 00:01:37,166
Okay, I'm quiet now.
17
00:01:37,250 --> 00:01:39,920
[Carrie] Just when Miranda
thought she'd hit rock bottom,
18
00:01:40,000 --> 00:01:43,460
she discovered a new
geological layer of humiliation.
19
00:01:44,583 --> 00:01:47,333
Well, we got your tests back
and everything looks fine.
20
00:01:47,417 --> 00:01:48,287
Great!
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00:01:48,375 --> 00:01:49,665
Just one small thing.
22
00:01:49,917 --> 00:01:52,287
It appears you have
a lazy ovary.
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00:01:52,875 --> 00:01:54,165
A lazy ovary?
24
00:01:54,250 --> 00:01:57,630
Yes. Your right ovary
has stopped producing eggs.
25
00:01:58,208 --> 00:02:00,668
Is it possible
it's just on strike?
26
00:02:02,000 --> 00:02:03,330
I know what this is.
27
00:02:03,625 --> 00:02:05,285
My right ovary has given up hope
28
00:02:05,375 --> 00:02:07,625
that I will ever get married
and have kids.
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00:02:07,709 --> 00:02:10,329
It's like working on a case
that you know
is gonna settle out of court.
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00:02:10,417 --> 00:02:11,417
Why bother?
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00:02:11,500 --> 00:02:12,750
Well, the left one
still believes.
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00:02:12,834 --> 00:02:14,464
I'm a biological underachiever.
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00:02:14,542 --> 00:02:17,382
And it's ironic because
that ovary went to Harvard.
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00:02:18,083 --> 00:02:19,713
I have a tilted uterus.
35
00:02:20,542 --> 00:02:23,212
-So?
-So the sperm have to jump
36
00:02:23,291 --> 00:02:25,131
over that hurdle
to get to my egg.
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00:02:25,208 --> 00:02:27,788
Yes, but once they get there,
there will be an egg.
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00:02:27,875 --> 00:02:30,455
I need a new gynecologist.
Do you like yours?
39
00:02:30,542 --> 00:02:31,922
Not right now, no.
40
00:02:32,000 --> 00:02:33,080
Well, at least she's a woman.
41
00:02:33,417 --> 00:02:35,957
I tried to go to a man,
but it was just too strange.
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00:02:36,041 --> 00:02:39,081
Having a guy spend
all that time down there,
and then you leave
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00:02:39,166 --> 00:02:40,536
without an orgasm and a bill.
44
00:02:40,625 --> 00:02:42,285
Here, you guys,
I'm gonna get this.
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00:02:42,375 --> 00:02:43,455
[Miranda] You know,
46
00:02:43,542 --> 00:02:45,422
I don't think
these are accepted here.
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00:02:45,667 --> 00:02:46,877
Oops!
48
00:02:48,208 --> 00:02:49,918
I'm spending the night at Big's.
49
00:02:50,000 --> 00:02:53,290
My God, after all this time,
you don't have so much
as a drawer there?
50
00:02:53,375 --> 00:02:54,995
Big is weird about stuff .
51
00:02:55,083 --> 00:02:58,383
All men are.
That's why you have to just
stake out some territory.
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00:02:58,458 --> 00:03:00,828
Sweetie, it's not a land run,
it's a relationship.
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00:03:00,917 --> 00:03:02,747
Exactly, talk to him about it.
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00:03:02,834 --> 00:03:05,044
With Big, I think it's best to
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00:03:05,125 --> 00:03:07,165
walk softly and carry
a big purse.
56
00:03:07,250 --> 00:03:09,080
Yes. She shouldn't leave
anything there.
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00:03:09,166 --> 00:03:11,376
It's important to remain
a creature of mystery.
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00:03:11,458 --> 00:03:14,248
What's the big mystery?
He knows that
she wears underwear.
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00:03:14,333 --> 00:03:16,083
I never leave underwear
at a guy's place
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00:03:16,166 --> 00:03:17,246
because I never see it again.
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00:03:17,333 --> 00:03:18,463
What happens to it?
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00:03:18,542 --> 00:03:19,922
Nothing, I just never go back.
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00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:21,540
[Carrie] Doesn't that get
a little expensive?
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00:03:21,625 --> 00:03:24,325
Disposing of lingerie every time
you sleep with a guy?
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00:03:24,417 --> 00:03:26,707
That's why I stopped
wearing underwear on dates.
66
00:03:26,792 --> 00:03:29,632
And that's why I'm never
borrowing a dress
from you again.
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00:03:30,041 --> 00:03:33,211
I once found another
woman's underwear
in a man's bed.
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00:03:33,291 --> 00:03:35,921
-Maybe it was Samantha's!
-[clears throat]
69
00:03:36,000 --> 00:03:39,710
You know,
once in Steve's bathroom,
I found one of those
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00:03:39,792 --> 00:03:41,752
hair scrunchies from the '80s.
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00:03:42,083 --> 00:03:44,083
I'm not sure
what was more disturbing,
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00:03:44,166 --> 00:03:45,996
the fact that he had
a girlfriend before me
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00:03:46,083 --> 00:03:48,963
or the fact that he dated
someone who wore a scrunchie.
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00:03:49,041 --> 00:03:51,711
Half my music collection
is left behind
by past boyfriends.
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00:03:51,792 --> 00:03:53,252
I always give that stuff back.
76
00:03:53,333 --> 00:03:56,043
Oh, I don't. I consider it
a parting gift.
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00:03:56,291 --> 00:03:59,711
Thanks for playing,
and here's the latest
from Hootie and the Blowfish.
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00:03:59,792 --> 00:04:01,422
They're sexual souvenirs.
79
00:04:01,500 --> 00:04:03,380
Okay, then I want
a t-shirt that says,
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00:04:03,458 --> 00:04:07,288
"I dated a bartender and
all I got was this lousy ovary."
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00:04:11,333 --> 00:04:14,133
[Carrie] The next morning
at Big's, I started to think...
82
00:04:14,208 --> 00:04:15,668
If the things we leave behind
83
00:04:15,750 --> 00:04:19,380
become the archaeological relics
of our sexual history,
84
00:04:19,458 --> 00:04:21,288
I should be able
to leave something.
85
00:04:28,000 --> 00:04:31,290
Ancient man left cave drawings
to prove they existed.
86
00:04:32,083 --> 00:04:33,963
I left a Hair Pro 1200.
87
00:04:39,125 --> 00:04:40,245
And I didn't stop at that.
88
00:04:40,333 --> 00:04:42,793
[Big whistling]
89
00:04:47,417 --> 00:04:49,287
Man may have discovered fire,
90
00:04:49,375 --> 00:04:51,665
but women discovered
how to play with it.
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00:04:54,041 --> 00:04:56,291
Charlotte was making
history, as well.
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00:04:56,375 --> 00:04:58,995
Tired of the Neanderthal
she'd been dating,
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00:04:59,083 --> 00:05:00,833
she was spending
her Saturday night
94
00:05:00,917 --> 00:05:03,707
with a gay friend
who'd catered parties
for the gallery,
95
00:05:03,792 --> 00:05:05,632
dessert chef, Stephan Bodine.
96
00:05:05,709 --> 00:05:09,129
I had no idea that
Betty Buckley was so talented.
97
00:05:09,208 --> 00:05:11,328
Please, she's the cat's pajamas.
98
00:05:11,875 --> 00:05:13,205
Why do people say that?
99
00:05:13,291 --> 00:05:15,751
I have no idea.
Maybe because she was in Cats .
100
00:05:15,834 --> 00:05:16,714
[hisses]
101
00:05:16,792 --> 00:05:18,132
Hey, let's start another one.
102
00:05:18,208 --> 00:05:21,208
-Like, "She's the dog's tuxedo."
-[laughing] Okay.
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00:05:22,542 --> 00:05:24,082
Thank you so much
for inviting me.
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00:05:24,166 --> 00:05:25,876
No, no, no, please, thank you
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00:05:25,959 --> 00:05:27,709
for accepting
my last-minute invite.
106
00:05:27,792 --> 00:05:29,292
My friend Don
canceled this morning
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00:05:29,375 --> 00:05:30,535
and we had had tickets forever.
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00:05:30,834 --> 00:05:32,924
Well, you can call me any time.
It's just so refreshing
109
00:05:33,000 --> 00:05:35,130
to go out with a man
that I can actually talk to.
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00:05:35,375 --> 00:05:36,495
You want to grab a cappuccino?
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00:05:36,583 --> 00:05:38,833
Oh, no, I've just
got to get on home.
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00:05:38,917 --> 00:05:40,917
-Well, you're uptown?
-Yeah, and you're...
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00:05:41,000 --> 00:05:42,040
Chelsea.
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00:05:42,542 --> 00:05:43,582
I'll hail you a cab.
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00:05:48,792 --> 00:05:50,082
[laughing] What?
116
00:05:53,417 --> 00:05:54,957
Or you could get one yourself.
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00:05:55,250 --> 00:05:56,830
Just helps to show a little leg.
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00:05:56,917 --> 00:05:59,207
You know, I've tried that,
and nothing.
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00:05:59,291 --> 00:06:00,381
[Charlotte laughs]
120
00:06:00,875 --> 00:06:02,745
Thank you, goodnight.
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00:06:13,041 --> 00:06:14,041
Goodnight.
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00:06:19,625 --> 00:06:21,535
[Carrie] So, what happened?
What do you think?
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00:06:21,834 --> 00:06:25,174
I am so confused.
Is he gay
or is he straight?
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00:06:25,250 --> 00:06:26,710
Well,
it's not that simple anymore.
125
00:06:26,792 --> 00:06:28,502
The real question is,
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00:06:28,792 --> 00:06:30,292
is he a straight gay man?
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00:06:30,375 --> 00:06:32,245
Or is he a gay straight man?
128
00:06:32,333 --> 00:06:35,543
The gay straight man
was a new strain
of heterosexual male
129
00:06:35,625 --> 00:06:38,205
spawned in Manhattan
as the result of overexposure
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00:06:38,291 --> 00:06:41,081
to fashion, exotic cuisine,
musical theater,
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00:06:41,166 --> 00:06:42,286
and antique furniture.
132
00:06:42,375 --> 00:06:44,035
Well, hopefully he's a gay
straight man.
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00:06:44,125 --> 00:06:46,745
Which means he's straight
with a lot of great
gay qualities.
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00:06:46,834 --> 00:06:48,424
Whereas a straight gay guy,
135
00:06:48,500 --> 00:06:51,330
is just a gay guy who
plays sports and won't fuck you.
136
00:06:51,417 --> 00:06:53,207
He must be a gay straight man
137
00:06:53,291 --> 00:06:55,381
because he asked Charlotte out
for a second date.
138
00:06:55,458 --> 00:06:57,918
Unless he's a straight gay man
in denial.
139
00:06:58,166 --> 00:07:00,166
But our thing Saturday night
wasn't even a date.
140
00:07:00,250 --> 00:07:02,710
I didn't wash my hair
and I wore my glasses.
141
00:07:02,792 --> 00:07:06,332
Are those recreational?
Because this drink
isn't doing it for me.
142
00:07:06,417 --> 00:07:09,497
They're hormones. I'm trying
to jump-start my ovary.
143
00:07:09,583 --> 00:07:11,543
I think my mother's taking
those for menopause.
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00:07:11,625 --> 00:07:13,785
Why, does she have
a tilted uterus too?
145
00:07:14,500 --> 00:07:18,080
Hey, isn't anybody
going to notice my purse?
146
00:07:18,166 --> 00:07:19,496
-Aw!
-Cute!
147
00:07:19,583 --> 00:07:20,673
Is it new?
148
00:07:20,750 --> 00:07:23,880
No, but it is quite small
and panty-free.
149
00:07:23,959 --> 00:07:25,629
You left your underwear
at Big's.
150
00:07:25,709 --> 00:07:29,379
Well, no, but I did leave
a hairbrush, a hair dryer,
151
00:07:29,458 --> 00:07:31,498
razors, tampons...
152
00:07:31,959 --> 00:07:33,129
and eye makeup remover.
153
00:07:33,208 --> 00:07:34,828
Wow, good for you!
154
00:07:35,750 --> 00:07:37,170
And something else.
155
00:07:38,250 --> 00:07:40,380
What?
156
00:07:42,792 --> 00:07:44,712
For the first time at Big's...
157
00:07:45,041 --> 00:07:46,171
I did a number two.
158
00:07:46,250 --> 00:07:47,880
Oh, no!
159
00:07:48,291 --> 00:07:49,461
No!
160
00:07:49,542 --> 00:07:51,672
Yes! Now I think
it's a good sign
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00:07:51,750 --> 00:07:54,830
that I feel comfortable enough
with Big to do a number two.
162
00:07:54,917 --> 00:07:56,457
It is not a good sign.
163
00:07:56,542 --> 00:07:58,132
It's the end of romance.
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00:07:58,208 --> 00:07:59,748
[Miranda] This is a big deal.
165
00:07:59,834 --> 00:08:01,384
I went through
an entire relationship
166
00:08:01,458 --> 00:08:03,128
never doing that
at the guy's place,
167
00:08:03,208 --> 00:08:05,918
including a weekend in Bermuda
where I spent the whole time
168
00:08:06,000 --> 00:08:07,130
running to the lobby.
169
00:08:07,208 --> 00:08:08,538
Yeah, it's tough in New York,
you know.
170
00:08:08,625 --> 00:08:10,325
Apartments are small,
there's one bathroom.
171
00:08:10,417 --> 00:08:11,707
You can hear
everybody's everything.
172
00:08:11,792 --> 00:08:13,832
That's why
I only date rich men.
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00:08:13,917 --> 00:08:15,537
Money means that
there's enough space
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00:08:15,625 --> 00:08:17,825
to distance yourself
from the number two.
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00:08:17,917 --> 00:08:21,827
I have never done a number two
at a boyfriend's place.
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00:08:21,917 --> 00:08:25,577
Honey, you're so uptight,
you need to do a number seven.
177
00:08:25,875 --> 00:08:26,875
[bartender] Excuse me.
178
00:08:27,417 --> 00:08:29,247
It's from that guy
at the end of the bar.
179
00:08:29,750 --> 00:08:31,080
Oh, really?
180
00:08:35,834 --> 00:08:38,294
Oh, my God, it's Dominic.
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00:08:38,375 --> 00:08:41,325
[Carrie] Dominic Delmonaco
was a publishing magnate,
182
00:08:41,417 --> 00:08:44,787
and the first and only man
Samantha really loved.
183
00:08:44,875 --> 00:08:46,125
He wined and dined her,
184
00:08:46,208 --> 00:08:47,828
set the bar for hot sex,
185
00:08:47,917 --> 00:08:51,537
then dumped her for an
Icelandic supermodel named Anka.
186
00:08:51,625 --> 00:08:53,285
Once on the cover of Fortune,
187
00:08:53,375 --> 00:08:56,705
he'd fallen to tabloid level
due to a messy public divorce.
188
00:08:57,834 --> 00:08:59,254
I'm just gonna say hello.
189
00:08:59,834 --> 00:09:01,214
After what he did to you?
190
00:09:01,291 --> 00:09:03,831
-What did he do?
-He broke her heart.
191
00:09:03,917 --> 00:09:06,327
Imagining Samantha
with a broken heart
192
00:09:06,417 --> 00:09:08,127
was almost more confusing
to Charlotte
193
00:09:08,208 --> 00:09:09,878
than a French kiss
from a gay man.
194
00:09:09,959 --> 00:09:10,999
Ancient history.
195
00:09:11,083 --> 00:09:12,923
I'm the one
with the power now.
196
00:09:13,417 --> 00:09:15,127
I've evolved past him.
197
00:09:28,291 --> 00:09:29,211
Hey, beautiful.
198
00:09:29,291 --> 00:09:30,631
Hiya, handsome.
199
00:09:36,625 --> 00:09:38,125
Hey! What's this?
200
00:09:38,500 --> 00:09:40,670
Oh, just a few things
you left at my place.
201
00:09:43,083 --> 00:09:44,133
Oh...
202
00:09:45,041 --> 00:09:46,001
Thanks.
203
00:09:51,333 --> 00:09:53,173
It's like I had
one too many items
204
00:09:53,250 --> 00:09:56,540
and I was being kicked out
of the relationship
express lane.
205
00:09:56,625 --> 00:09:58,825
What is it about
Big's apartment?
206
00:09:58,917 --> 00:10:01,877
Nothing ever sticks,
it's like Teflon for women.
207
00:10:09,500 --> 00:10:12,170
I meant to leave that stuff
at your apartment.
208
00:10:13,834 --> 00:10:14,834
Why?
209
00:10:15,125 --> 00:10:16,035
Well...
210
00:10:16,667 --> 00:10:20,287
For one thing, I don't wake up
looking like this.
211
00:10:20,500 --> 00:10:23,420
I actually need stuff
to look like this.
212
00:10:23,500 --> 00:10:25,580
And it would be nice
not to have to
213
00:10:25,667 --> 00:10:28,707
carry it around all day
with me like a nomad.
214
00:10:29,375 --> 00:10:31,375
It's just a few things.
215
00:10:31,625 --> 00:10:32,995
And you can leave stuff here.
216
00:10:33,083 --> 00:10:34,463
I don't want to
leave stuff here.
217
00:10:34,542 --> 00:10:36,922
Well, not a lot of stuff,
just like...
218
00:10:38,125 --> 00:10:40,075
You know, if you want to
shave in the morning.
219
00:10:40,166 --> 00:10:41,166
I shave at the gym.
220
00:10:41,375 --> 00:10:43,205
Okay, then, I don't know.
221
00:10:43,709 --> 00:10:44,629
Socks.
222
00:10:45,000 --> 00:10:46,460
You want me
to leave socks here?
223
00:10:46,542 --> 00:10:49,212
Well, never mind what I want,
what do you want?
224
00:10:49,291 --> 00:10:51,211
I don't know,
let's save an hour.
225
00:10:51,709 --> 00:10:53,249
Why don't you just
tell me what I want?
226
00:10:53,333 --> 00:10:55,463
No, really. In your mind...
227
00:10:56,083 --> 00:10:59,213
what is the ideal
living situation
for two people
228
00:10:59,750 --> 00:11:00,920
in a relationship?
229
00:11:05,875 --> 00:11:07,375
Exactly what we have.
230
00:11:08,291 --> 00:11:09,381
And what is that?
231
00:11:09,750 --> 00:11:11,130
I have my place,
232
00:11:11,458 --> 00:11:12,578
you have yours.
233
00:11:13,125 --> 00:11:14,575
We're together
when we want to be.
234
00:11:14,792 --> 00:11:16,542
And we're apart
when we want to be.
235
00:11:16,917 --> 00:11:18,207
Like Woody and Mia.
236
00:11:18,291 --> 00:11:20,171
Before Soon-Yi.
237
00:11:20,250 --> 00:11:24,460
[Carrie] Ever since Woody Allen
described waving to Mia Farrow
across the park,
238
00:11:24,542 --> 00:11:26,332
single men in Manhattan
had yearned
239
00:11:26,417 --> 00:11:28,827
for that kind
of separate togetherness.
240
00:11:28,917 --> 00:11:31,207
I felt like the last dinosaur.
241
00:11:31,291 --> 00:11:33,291
Was I the one
who needed to adapt?
242
00:11:33,375 --> 00:11:35,745
Was my view
of a relationship extinct?
243
00:11:37,667 --> 00:11:39,167
I couldn't stop
thinking about it.
244
00:11:39,250 --> 00:11:42,170
This is a city where gay men
are so out, they're in.
245
00:11:42,250 --> 00:11:44,330
Where women
are so chronically single,
246
00:11:44,417 --> 00:11:46,827
ovaries may be
the next vestigial organ.
247
00:11:46,917 --> 00:11:48,667
We can have anything
delivered at any hour.
248
00:11:48,750 --> 00:11:50,710
We can have our dogs walked,
our clothes cleaned,
249
00:11:50,792 --> 00:11:52,082
our food cooked.
250
00:11:52,166 --> 00:11:54,536
Who needs a husband
when you have a doorman?
251
00:11:54,625 --> 00:11:57,035
Are New Yorkers
evolving past relationships?
252
00:11:57,125 --> 00:11:58,745
[Samantha] Relationships
have been on the decline
253
00:11:58,834 --> 00:12:00,714
since women came out
of the cave, looked around,
and said,
254
00:12:00,792 --> 00:12:02,042
"This isn't so hard."
255
00:12:02,291 --> 00:12:04,921
Okay, so you don't need a man,
but do you still want one?
256
00:12:05,000 --> 00:12:06,540
Oh, honey,
I want more than one.
257
00:12:06,625 --> 00:12:09,495
I can't decide whether
you represent our future
258
00:12:09,709 --> 00:12:11,879
-or our demise.
-I am the future.
259
00:12:12,166 --> 00:12:15,916
Seeing Dominic reminded me
of how needy I was
and how far I've come.
260
00:12:16,000 --> 00:12:17,500
We're going out
Friday night.
261
00:12:17,583 --> 00:12:21,383
Oh, sweetie! It took you
a year to get over him.
262
00:12:21,458 --> 00:12:23,078
He treated you like shit.
263
00:12:23,375 --> 00:12:24,785
Why would you want to
go out with him again?
264
00:12:24,875 --> 00:12:26,415
Because he treated me
like shit.
265
00:12:26,500 --> 00:12:28,210
Okay, I'm leaning towards
demise.
266
00:12:28,291 --> 00:12:29,211
It's called revenge.
267
00:12:29,291 --> 00:12:30,461
I'm gonna make him want me,
268
00:12:30,542 --> 00:12:31,922
then right before we do it,
269
00:12:32,000 --> 00:12:33,960
I'm gonna drop him
like he dropped me.
270
00:12:34,291 --> 00:12:35,501
As long as you got a plan.
271
00:12:35,709 --> 00:12:38,579
Not only a plan,
I have a dress.
272
00:12:38,667 --> 00:12:41,747
[Carrie] Samantha's revenge
fantasy, like all her fantasies,
273
00:12:41,834 --> 00:12:42,924
was even better live.
274
00:12:43,000 --> 00:12:43,960
[Dominic] Wow!
275
00:12:44,041 --> 00:12:45,881
You're more beautiful
than ever.
276
00:12:46,333 --> 00:12:49,083
So successful,
and I'm getting gray hair
277
00:12:49,166 --> 00:12:51,826
and Anka is taking me
for everything I've got.
278
00:12:52,417 --> 00:12:55,667
I read that she got
the sailboat.
279
00:12:55,917 --> 00:12:57,957
Yes, well, we had good times
in that boat.
280
00:12:58,375 --> 00:12:59,495
You and Anka?
281
00:12:59,834 --> 00:13:02,174
-You and I.
-Oh!
282
00:13:02,542 --> 00:13:04,002
Have I mentioned how...
283
00:13:04,458 --> 00:13:06,668
unbelievable you look
in that dress?
284
00:13:11,834 --> 00:13:14,044
[Carrie] And since
Stephan hadn't come out,
285
00:13:14,125 --> 00:13:16,705
Charlotte accepted
his invitation to stay in.
286
00:13:23,667 --> 00:13:24,707
Mm...
287
00:13:25,041 --> 00:13:26,291
That's delicious.
288
00:13:26,375 --> 00:13:27,915
Grilled portobello pizzas
289
00:13:28,000 --> 00:13:31,130
topped with fresh basil
and Parmigiano-Reggiano cheese.
290
00:13:31,208 --> 00:13:32,078
Mm!
291
00:13:32,166 --> 00:13:33,206
It's Martha's recipe.
292
00:13:34,208 --> 00:13:35,878
Well, I love Martha Stewart.
293
00:13:36,041 --> 00:13:37,581
She's the dog's tuxedo.
294
00:13:39,125 --> 00:13:40,165
Oh, look.
295
00:13:40,625 --> 00:13:43,375
You have these silk place mats
I've been eyeing at Bergdorf's.
296
00:13:43,875 --> 00:13:44,995
You have good taste.
297
00:13:45,208 --> 00:13:48,668
Well, this is
my fantasy kitchen.
298
00:13:49,041 --> 00:13:50,671
And this is my fantasy.
299
00:14:02,417 --> 00:14:04,077
Is that dress Cynthia Rowley?
300
00:14:06,000 --> 00:14:08,580
-Uh-huh.
-[Carrie] Charlotte wanted
to be open-minded,
301
00:14:08,667 --> 00:14:11,577
but Stephan seemed to be
making it as hard as possible.
302
00:14:14,041 --> 00:14:17,921
Meanwhile, Samantha was making
Dominic as hard as possible.
303
00:14:21,417 --> 00:14:22,747
So, do you want me?
304
00:14:23,792 --> 00:14:24,752
Oh...
305
00:14:25,625 --> 00:14:26,915
do I want you.
306
00:14:32,917 --> 00:14:36,627
[Carrie] This was the moment
Samantha had waited years
and years for.
307
00:14:36,709 --> 00:14:38,459
What was another couple hours?
308
00:14:39,125 --> 00:14:40,285
[moans]
309
00:14:46,959 --> 00:14:48,129
[phone ringing]
310
00:14:50,166 --> 00:14:51,376
Hello.
311
00:14:51,458 --> 00:14:52,878
I've been trying to call you.
Were you at Big's?
312
00:14:52,959 --> 00:14:54,629
Oh, no, I was out shopping.
313
00:14:54,959 --> 00:14:56,379
My relationship
is at a standstill.
314
00:14:56,458 --> 00:14:58,498
So instead,
I'm evolving my look.
315
00:14:58,583 --> 00:15:00,213
Hey, how did it go with Dominic?
316
00:15:00,458 --> 00:15:01,538
I slept with him.
317
00:15:01,625 --> 00:15:03,415
Well, that wasn't
part of the plan.
318
00:15:03,500 --> 00:15:06,210
It's part of the new plan.
I wanted to remind him
what he was missing.
319
00:15:06,709 --> 00:15:09,539
I can't believe I thought
he was such a great lover.
320
00:15:09,750 --> 00:15:11,130
I'm better than him now.
321
00:15:11,208 --> 00:15:12,828
-[Carrie giggles]
-[Samantha] Bye.
322
00:15:15,000 --> 00:15:18,210
[Carrie] In order to survive
two decades of dating
in New York,
323
00:15:18,291 --> 00:15:20,751
Samantha had become
a powerful hybrid,
324
00:15:20,834 --> 00:15:24,794
the ego of a man
trapped in the body of a woman.
325
00:15:24,875 --> 00:15:27,575
Charlotte feared the opposite
was true of Stephan.
326
00:15:27,667 --> 00:15:30,327
She still needed help
classifying her find,
327
00:15:30,417 --> 00:15:32,577
so she brought in
a team of experts.
328
00:15:32,667 --> 00:15:35,627
Uh... Carrie, Stanford,
this is Stephan.
329
00:15:35,834 --> 00:15:36,674
-Hi.
-[Stephan] Hi.
330
00:15:36,750 --> 00:15:37,790
-Ciao.
-[Stephan] Oh!
331
00:15:37,875 --> 00:15:39,075
You changed your hair.
332
00:15:39,166 --> 00:15:41,456
Oh, yeah, I just...
it's just straightened.
333
00:15:41,542 --> 00:15:42,922
-Have we met?
-Oh, no, no, no.
334
00:15:43,000 --> 00:15:44,750
I've seen your column.
And in that photo,
335
00:15:44,834 --> 00:15:46,754
your hair is, like,
free-flowing and...
336
00:15:46,834 --> 00:15:47,884
Botticelli-esque.
337
00:15:48,834 --> 00:15:50,334
It's fabulous either way.
338
00:15:50,417 --> 00:15:51,537
So...
339
00:15:52,000 --> 00:15:54,670
Cannolis and cream puffs
and tarts, oh my!
340
00:15:56,834 --> 00:15:58,544
I put a little bit
of everything.
341
00:15:58,625 --> 00:16:00,745
Um... This one's an experiment.
342
00:16:00,834 --> 00:16:03,424
It's a date tart
with a pumpkin custard.
343
00:16:04,125 --> 00:16:05,285
This is all for us?
344
00:16:05,375 --> 00:16:06,745
Sweets for my sweet.
345
00:16:06,834 --> 00:16:08,464
And her freeloading friends.
346
00:16:08,542 --> 00:16:11,882
My nutritionist will kill me,
but somebody hand me a fork.
347
00:16:11,959 --> 00:16:13,579
-Can you join us?
-I'd love to,
348
00:16:13,667 --> 00:16:15,417
I have got to glaze
my wedding cake.
349
00:16:19,083 --> 00:16:20,713
[Stephan] Get back to me
on the tart.
350
00:16:26,166 --> 00:16:27,916
I find him very attractive.
351
00:16:28,000 --> 00:16:30,040
Which of course means
he's straight.
352
00:16:30,125 --> 00:16:32,205
Plus, he's obviously
choosing to be straight
353
00:16:32,291 --> 00:16:35,331
because he seems to be
head over heels about this one.
354
00:16:35,959 --> 00:16:38,539
What if he's gay
and he doesn't know it yet?
355
00:16:38,625 --> 00:16:40,875
Honey, we are aware.
356
00:16:41,208 --> 00:16:43,628
When I was a boy,
my father gave me a book
357
00:16:43,709 --> 00:16:46,669
about the female body
to teach me about sex.
358
00:16:46,750 --> 00:16:49,040
I took one look
at it and said,
359
00:16:49,792 --> 00:16:50,832
"No."
360
00:16:50,917 --> 00:16:52,287
Well, how is he in bed?
361
00:16:52,375 --> 00:16:54,375
I don't know, I haven't slept
with him yet.
362
00:16:55,333 --> 00:16:56,333
Really?
363
00:16:56,417 --> 00:16:57,577
But he wants to.
364
00:16:57,917 --> 00:16:59,327
It's so not fair.
365
00:16:59,417 --> 00:17:01,167
All the good ones are straight.
366
00:17:01,250 --> 00:17:02,580
Even the gay ones.
367
00:17:03,542 --> 00:17:04,922
Give me a cannoli.
368
00:17:16,750 --> 00:17:18,420
Are you looking
at my forehead?
369
00:17:18,500 --> 00:17:20,130
No, no!
370
00:17:20,208 --> 00:17:22,708
[Carrie] That night,
Miranda went out
with Joseph Adler,
371
00:17:22,792 --> 00:17:24,132
a labor relations lawyer
372
00:17:24,208 --> 00:17:26,248
who'd been after her
since the firm retreat.
373
00:17:26,333 --> 00:17:27,923
The lamb is delicious.
374
00:17:28,000 --> 00:17:30,250
You can look if you want,
I've got nothing to hide.
375
00:17:31,166 --> 00:17:32,706
It's actually
starting to fill in.
376
00:17:32,792 --> 00:17:33,792
Mm-hm.
377
00:17:35,625 --> 00:17:37,035
[Carrie] She'd refused him
twice before
378
00:17:37,125 --> 00:17:39,375
but since she was down
to her last ovary,
379
00:17:39,458 --> 00:17:42,378
Miranda decided she was
in no position to eliminate men
380
00:17:42,458 --> 00:17:43,998
on the basis of hair plugs.
381
00:17:44,083 --> 00:17:46,383
I'm telling you,
I was practically bald.
382
00:17:46,458 --> 00:17:47,538
I remember.
383
00:17:47,625 --> 00:17:50,285
And now I have hair.
This is a miracle.
384
00:17:51,333 --> 00:17:53,583
-Some more bastilla?
-Oh, sure.
385
00:17:56,041 --> 00:17:57,671
You probably think I'm crazy.
386
00:17:58,458 --> 00:18:00,668
Actually, I was thinking
you seem very happy.
387
00:18:01,000 --> 00:18:05,170
You know, the funny thing is,
I never thought that I'd be
the kind of guy to get plugs.
388
00:18:05,500 --> 00:18:08,290
But I've learned that
you should never say never.
389
00:18:09,375 --> 00:18:10,495
I know what you mean.
390
00:18:10,834 --> 00:18:13,044
There are things that
I've been considering lately
391
00:18:13,125 --> 00:18:15,495
that I never thought
I would consider.
392
00:18:15,834 --> 00:18:16,884
Like what?
393
00:18:18,041 --> 00:18:19,291
Do you really want to know?
394
00:18:19,542 --> 00:18:20,542
Sure.
395
00:18:21,917 --> 00:18:25,917
Well, I recently found out
that I have a lazy ovary.
396
00:18:26,000 --> 00:18:27,330
Which is no big deal.
397
00:18:27,542 --> 00:18:30,502
It just means I only produce
an egg every other month.
398
00:18:30,583 --> 00:18:32,793
And I'm not even sure
that I want kids, but...
399
00:18:33,125 --> 00:18:36,745
all of a sudden it hit me
that if the other ovary
shuts down,
400
00:18:36,834 --> 00:18:38,504
I'm out of business. So...
401
00:18:39,000 --> 00:18:40,500
I've started taking hormones,
402
00:18:40,583 --> 00:18:44,003
and now I'm actually
considering freezing my eggs.
403
00:18:45,250 --> 00:18:46,540
Freezing your eggs?
404
00:18:46,625 --> 00:18:49,875
Yeah, you know, like
a fertility savings account.
405
00:18:49,959 --> 00:18:51,749
I think it would
take the pressure off.
406
00:18:51,834 --> 00:18:54,584
It removes the whole
biological clock issue.
407
00:18:54,667 --> 00:18:57,037
Yeah, but it raises
a lot of other issues.
408
00:18:57,625 --> 00:19:00,035
Such as?
409
00:19:00,125 --> 00:19:02,745
What is all this reproductive
technology doing for us?
410
00:19:02,834 --> 00:19:06,884
I mean, do we want
desperate women
having babies at 50?
411
00:19:07,834 --> 00:19:10,004
Maybe some people aren't
supposed to procreate.
412
00:19:10,500 --> 00:19:14,210
Maybe this is the world's way
of weeding out the weak.
You see?
413
00:19:14,500 --> 00:19:17,330
If you ask me, this is
a ridiculous abuse of science.
414
00:19:17,625 --> 00:19:22,205
You have now designer sperm
and these simulated wombs.
415
00:19:22,542 --> 00:19:23,632
Here's a good idea.
416
00:19:24,083 --> 00:19:27,133
-Why don't we just
eliminate men altogether?
-Hey!
417
00:19:27,542 --> 00:19:31,002
I don't need to be lectured
about science by a man
who's doing crop rotation
418
00:19:31,083 --> 00:19:32,583
on his forehead.
419
00:19:32,667 --> 00:19:34,497
[Carrie] Miranda
went off the hormones,
420
00:19:34,583 --> 00:19:36,463
not because
of what Joseph said,
421
00:19:36,542 --> 00:19:38,422
but because she was only 33,
422
00:19:38,500 --> 00:19:40,080
she still had her left ovary,
423
00:19:40,166 --> 00:19:42,246
and she wasn't ready
to settle out of court.
424
00:19:44,083 --> 00:19:47,003
Maybe someday there would be
eggs in her freezer.
425
00:19:47,083 --> 00:19:48,083
But not yet.
426
00:19:50,333 --> 00:19:51,753
["Believe" by Cher playing]
427
00:19:51,834 --> 00:19:53,964
Meanwhile, Charlotte decided
to stop trying
428
00:19:54,041 --> 00:19:56,461
to figure out
her creature of mystery,
429
00:19:56,542 --> 00:19:57,882
and just enjoy.
430
00:19:58,792 --> 00:19:59,792
Cher?
431
00:20:00,291 --> 00:20:01,581
I love her.
432
00:20:01,750 --> 00:20:03,290
She's such a survivor.
433
00:20:10,500 --> 00:20:11,500
[Charlotte] Wait.
434
00:20:13,458 --> 00:20:14,958
I have to ask you something.
435
00:20:19,083 --> 00:20:20,793
Have you ever been with a man?
436
00:20:23,625 --> 00:20:24,575
No.
437
00:20:24,667 --> 00:20:26,247
Have you ever
been with a woman?
438
00:20:26,750 --> 00:20:28,330
I'm sorry, it's just...
439
00:20:30,792 --> 00:20:32,132
Betty Buckley and...
440
00:20:32,667 --> 00:20:35,827
Martha Stewart and,
and Cynthia Rowley!
441
00:20:38,000 --> 00:20:39,330
Are you gay?
442
00:20:39,583 --> 00:20:40,833
[laughs]
443
00:20:42,291 --> 00:20:43,461
Charlotte,
444
00:20:44,250 --> 00:20:47,750
I'm a 35-year-old pastry chef
who lives in Chelsea.
445
00:20:48,333 --> 00:20:49,963
If I were gay,
446
00:20:50,458 --> 00:20:51,748
I would be gay.
447
00:20:54,500 --> 00:20:56,500
You're the one
who doesn't want to make love.
448
00:20:59,125 --> 00:21:01,325
I wouldn't be
so sure about that.
449
00:21:11,709 --> 00:21:13,749
[Carrie] Charlotte was relieved
and delighted
450
00:21:13,834 --> 00:21:16,714
to discover Stephan
was definitely straight,
451
00:21:16,792 --> 00:21:19,002
or at least a gay straight man.
452
00:21:19,083 --> 00:21:21,503
Frankly, after two orgasms,
who the hell cares?
453
00:21:21,583 --> 00:21:22,833
Oh, God.
454
00:21:27,917 --> 00:21:30,077
[Carrie] The next morning,
it dawned on Samantha
455
00:21:30,166 --> 00:21:34,326
that her desire for revenge
was not as strong
as her desire for Dominic.
456
00:21:36,375 --> 00:21:37,375
You're awake.
457
00:21:39,125 --> 00:21:40,075
Yes.
458
00:21:42,709 --> 00:21:44,539
You're so incredibly beautiful.
459
00:21:44,917 --> 00:21:46,827
[purrs]
460
00:21:49,375 --> 00:21:50,705
God.
461
00:21:51,375 --> 00:21:52,495
I'm gonna miss you.
462
00:21:53,000 --> 00:21:54,710
What do you mean?
463
00:21:55,041 --> 00:21:57,041
Anka and I are giving it
another shot.
464
00:21:58,667 --> 00:22:00,877
It's mostly financial.
465
00:22:02,250 --> 00:22:03,670
You can't do this to me.
466
00:22:03,750 --> 00:22:06,250
-I know, I'm sorry.
-No.
467
00:22:06,709 --> 00:22:08,959
No, no, no, no, no!
468
00:22:09,041 --> 00:22:10,791
I'm supposed to do this to you.
469
00:22:10,875 --> 00:22:12,995
I had a plan. This is all wrong!
470
00:22:13,083 --> 00:22:14,253
I should go.
471
00:22:15,500 --> 00:22:16,630
Get out!
472
00:22:16,834 --> 00:22:18,214
[Dominic] I said I was going.
473
00:22:18,625 --> 00:22:19,625
-[groans]
-[Dominic] Hey!
474
00:22:19,709 --> 00:22:22,039
Stop beating me to the punch!
475
00:22:22,125 --> 00:22:24,785
[Carrie] As she watched
history repeat itself,
476
00:22:24,875 --> 00:22:27,745
Samantha realized she couldn't
do what Dominic did,
477
00:22:27,834 --> 00:22:30,754
because she hadn't evolved
past having feelings.
478
00:22:31,667 --> 00:22:32,787
And in a way,
479
00:22:32,875 --> 00:22:34,245
that was nice to know.
480
00:22:40,875 --> 00:22:43,915
-Good morning.
-Good morning, sleepy.
481
00:22:44,750 --> 00:22:46,500
Something smells amazing.
482
00:22:46,583 --> 00:22:48,633
It's warm cranberry
buttermilk scones.
483
00:22:48,709 --> 00:22:50,289
-Mm!
-And lemon curd.
484
00:22:50,750 --> 00:22:53,960
If I continue dating you,
I'm gonna gain ten pounds.
485
00:22:54,041 --> 00:22:55,631
You'll still be gorgeous.
486
00:23:00,542 --> 00:23:02,462
-You want some tea?
-Yes, please.
487
00:23:03,083 --> 00:23:04,133
[squeaking]
488
00:23:04,625 --> 00:23:05,995
What is that noise?
489
00:23:06,291 --> 00:23:09,461
-What noise?
-It's kind of...
it's like a squeaking.
490
00:23:09,542 --> 00:23:10,962
[squeaking]
491
00:23:14,000 --> 00:23:15,880
Oh my God, oh my God.
492
00:23:15,959 --> 00:23:17,169
It's a mouse.
493
00:23:17,250 --> 00:23:18,920
-Are you sure?
-Yes, it's in that glue trap.
494
00:23:19,000 --> 00:23:19,880
Where?
495
00:23:19,959 --> 00:23:21,129
Uh... there. Oh, ew, ew!
496
00:23:21,208 --> 00:23:22,828
[Charlotte] Oh! Oh, my God!
497
00:23:22,917 --> 00:23:24,417
Its legs are stuck!
498
00:23:24,500 --> 00:23:26,540
-Ew! Get it out!
-Ew, do something.
499
00:23:26,625 --> 00:23:29,495
-Well, don't kick it to me!
-Get it out, get it out!
500
00:23:29,834 --> 00:23:32,044
-Ah! Will you do something?
-It touched my skin!
501
00:23:32,125 --> 00:23:34,205
It touched my skin!
It's coming out that way!
502
00:23:34,458 --> 00:23:36,748
[Charlotte] Ah! Get it away,
away!
503
00:23:38,500 --> 00:23:39,420
[Stephan] Ew!
504
00:23:39,500 --> 00:23:40,540
[squeaking]
505
00:23:40,625 --> 00:23:43,625
Oh my God, oh my God,
oh my God...
506
00:23:43,709 --> 00:23:47,079
[Carrie] At that moment,
Charlotte realized her
masculine side
507
00:23:47,166 --> 00:23:49,416
wasn't evolved enough
for a man whose feminine side
508
00:23:49,500 --> 00:23:52,130
was as highly evolved
as Stephan's.
509
00:23:55,166 --> 00:23:57,416
And I spent the night at Big's
for the first time
510
00:23:57,500 --> 00:23:59,880
since my stuff was
kicked out of the nest.
511
00:24:12,333 --> 00:24:14,043
Oh, God.
512
00:24:14,458 --> 00:24:15,538
Where are you going?
513
00:24:16,333 --> 00:24:19,333
-Home.
-No, nope.
514
00:24:20,709 --> 00:24:23,209
That's where my hair dryer is.
515
00:24:26,917 --> 00:24:28,827
I have to dry my hair.
516
00:24:29,375 --> 00:24:32,205
I'm wearing it straight
in case you didn't notice.
517
00:24:32,291 --> 00:24:33,711
I noticed.
518
00:24:34,792 --> 00:24:37,382
But I think it looks
pretty amazing right now.
519
00:24:38,542 --> 00:24:40,212
[laughing]
520
00:24:44,834 --> 00:24:45,754
[Big] Hey.
521
00:24:46,041 --> 00:24:48,631
Bring that gorgeous ass
back into bed.
522
00:24:49,417 --> 00:24:52,207
I just have to make sure
I didn't leave anything else.
523
00:25:04,041 --> 00:25:05,631
And suddenly I realized...
524
00:25:05,709 --> 00:25:08,999
I didn't have to worry about
leaving something behind,
525
00:25:09,083 --> 00:25:10,633
because I was there.
526
00:25:19,083 --> 00:25:20,083
Okay.
527
00:25:21,250 --> 00:25:22,750
I'll stay a little longer.
528
00:25:23,792 --> 00:25:25,582
But I'm leaving
this underwear here.
529
00:25:26,458 --> 00:25:27,538
Is it clean?
530
00:25:38,625 --> 00:25:39,575
[Carrie] Okay.
531
00:25:39,667 --> 00:25:41,667
It was a small step for mankind.
532
00:25:41,750 --> 00:25:44,420
But it was a really
big step for Big.
533
00:25:46,458 --> 00:25:48,418
[moaning softly]