1 00:00:48,008 --> 00:00:50,998 ♪ They say it's spring ♪ 2 00:00:52,012 --> 00:00:56,022 ♪ This feeling Light as a feather ♪ 3 00:00:56,020 --> 00:00:59,010 ♪ They say this thing ♪ 4 00:01:00,017 --> 00:01:04,007 ♪ This magic we share together ♪ 5 00:01:04,015 --> 00:01:08,015 ♪ Came with the weather too ♪ 6 00:01:08,023 --> 00:01:12,003 Here are some things I love about New York. 7 00:01:12,004 --> 00:01:14,024 That week in spring when it's warm, but not hot, 8 00:01:14,020 --> 00:01:17,010 and the trees are just beginning to bloom. 9 00:01:17,012 --> 00:01:19,012 Men in suits. 10 00:01:19,008 --> 00:01:21,998 Three papers and 12 gossip columns. 11 00:01:22,005 --> 00:01:24,015 It's easy for me to say, "I love you, New York." 12 00:01:24,019 --> 00:01:29,009 It's not so easy to say, "I love you, Mr. Big." 13 00:01:29,013 --> 00:01:32,023 The first time I realized I actually loved Big 14 00:01:32,020 --> 00:01:35,000 was over toast and coffee one morning. 15 00:01:35,006 --> 00:01:36,006 What? 16 00:01:37,009 --> 00:01:38,009 You got... 17 00:01:38,021 --> 00:01:40,011 Huh? Oh. 18 00:01:40,018 --> 00:01:41,018 Thanks, honey. 19 00:01:46,016 --> 00:01:47,016 What? 20 00:01:48,002 --> 00:01:49,012 Nothing. 21 00:01:49,013 --> 00:01:51,013 The first time I actually felt like saying it 22 00:01:51,012 --> 00:01:53,012 was the night he took me to the ballet. 23 00:01:53,012 --> 00:01:55,002 And he hates the ballet. 24 00:01:55,009 --> 00:01:56,019 I don't want to disappoint you, 25 00:01:57,013 --> 00:02:00,013 but I think a couple of those dancers had on wires. 26 00:02:01,005 --> 00:02:02,995 -They were not on wires. -Oh, yeah. 27 00:02:03,003 --> 00:02:05,013 On a couple of those big leaps I saw the wires. 28 00:02:06,022 --> 00:02:08,002 You know what? 29 00:02:09,003 --> 00:02:10,003 What? 30 00:02:11,014 --> 00:02:14,014 I love your hair like that. 31 00:02:14,023 --> 00:02:16,013 Cut it out. 32 00:02:19,021 --> 00:02:23,011 And then there was the time I never expected to say it. 33 00:02:24,017 --> 00:02:28,007 Last Friday night at approximately 7:20 p.m... 34 00:02:28,010 --> 00:02:29,020 Yuck. 35 00:02:29,021 --> 00:02:31,011 ...Big was picking me up to take me out to dinner. 36 00:02:31,008 --> 00:02:34,998 Hey. Hi, I just have to change my shoes. 37 00:02:35,002 --> 00:02:36,022 Well, hurry up, we don't want to be late. 38 00:02:36,018 --> 00:02:39,008 If we grab a cab on Madison, we can be there in five minutes. 39 00:02:46,010 --> 00:02:48,000 Okay. Okay. 40 00:02:48,003 --> 00:02:49,003 Here. 41 00:02:50,012 --> 00:02:52,002 Well, what's this for? 42 00:02:52,003 --> 00:02:54,023 Oh, I just saw it and thought of you. 43 00:03:07,004 --> 00:03:09,024 It was just... wrong. 44 00:03:09,020 --> 00:03:11,010 It was wrong. 45 00:03:11,008 --> 00:03:13,008 I didn't know what to say except... 46 00:03:16,015 --> 00:03:17,015 I love you. 47 00:03:18,008 --> 00:03:19,018 You told Big, "I love you," 48 00:03:19,020 --> 00:03:21,000 because he gave you that? 49 00:03:21,006 --> 00:03:23,016 What did you think it was, a large diamond duck ring? 50 00:03:23,018 --> 00:03:25,008 I think my mother has one of these 51 00:03:25,008 --> 00:03:26,008 in the shape of a squirrel. 52 00:03:26,015 --> 00:03:29,015 Note, I did not say I love the purse. 53 00:03:29,022 --> 00:03:31,012 And then what did he say? 54 00:03:31,009 --> 00:03:34,019 Well, he just sort of reacted stunned for a moment 55 00:03:34,023 --> 00:03:36,013 and then he said... 56 00:03:36,008 --> 00:03:37,008 Well... 57 00:03:38,023 --> 00:03:39,023 you're welcome. 58 00:03:39,023 --> 00:03:42,023 I'll just wait for you outside. 59 00:03:43,017 --> 00:03:46,017 Well, maybe he thought you said, "I love it." 60 00:03:46,020 --> 00:03:49,020 No, it was a very deliberate and distinct "you." 61 00:03:50,001 --> 00:03:52,011 So he just sort of pretended like you didn't say it? 62 00:03:52,009 --> 00:03:54,019 Yeah, sort of. But we both know I did. 63 00:03:54,018 --> 00:03:56,008 So, now I've laid down the gauntlet. 64 00:03:56,008 --> 00:03:57,018 He either has to say "I love you" back, 65 00:03:58,001 --> 00:04:00,011 or I guess I'm gonna have to break up with him. 66 00:04:00,016 --> 00:04:01,996 Well, how long are you gonna give him? 67 00:04:02,004 --> 00:04:04,004 Well, I didn't put an expiration date on the sentiment. 68 00:04:04,006 --> 00:04:06,006 But I figure it's got the shelf life of a dairy product. 69 00:04:06,016 --> 00:04:08,006 It's gonna start to curdle in about a week. 70 00:04:08,011 --> 00:04:10,001 You know, it's so interesting. 71 00:04:10,002 --> 00:04:11,012 You can tell a man, "I hate you," 72 00:04:11,013 --> 00:04:13,013 you have the best sex of your life. 73 00:04:13,008 --> 00:04:14,998 But tell him, "I love you," 74 00:04:15,008 --> 00:04:16,998 you'll probably never see him again. 75 00:04:17,004 --> 00:04:19,014 Well, that's just very comforting right now. 76 00:04:19,020 --> 00:04:21,010 Wait a minute. Time out. 77 00:04:21,018 --> 00:04:24,008 Did you ever think that at this very moment 78 00:04:24,007 --> 00:04:26,997 the man might be trying to find his own way to tell Carrie 79 00:04:27,006 --> 00:04:28,016 that he loves her? 80 00:04:29,000 --> 00:04:32,000 Listening to Miranda wax optimistic about love 81 00:04:32,002 --> 00:04:35,002 was more disorienting than a heat wave in February. 82 00:04:35,002 --> 00:04:36,002 - 83 00:04:36,011 --> 00:04:37,021 No. 84 00:04:37,017 --> 00:04:38,017 But it seemed that Miranda, 85 00:04:39,001 --> 00:04:40,011 formerly love's greatest skeptic, 86 00:04:40,011 --> 00:04:43,011 had recently experienced a romantic epiphany. 87 00:04:43,012 --> 00:04:45,022 Go grab us a seat outside and I'll meet you out there. 88 00:04:46,004 --> 00:04:47,014 Will you let me pay this time? 89 00:04:47,014 --> 00:04:49,004 No, no, no, your money's no good here. 90 00:04:49,003 --> 00:04:50,023 Go grab... grab us a bench. 91 00:04:51,016 --> 00:04:52,016 All right. 92 00:04:54,015 --> 00:04:55,005 How much? 93 00:04:55,013 --> 00:04:57,003 $5.90. -Ow! 94 00:04:57,003 --> 00:04:59,023 She was dating a bartender who worshiped her. 95 00:05:00,001 --> 00:05:02,021 And Miranda was so crazy about him in return 96 00:05:02,017 --> 00:05:04,007 that she let him take her out to dinner. 97 00:05:04,008 --> 00:05:06,018 But only to places she knew he could afford. 98 00:05:07,001 --> 00:05:08,001 Mmm! 99 00:05:08,004 --> 00:05:09,024 Best slices in the city, don't you think? 100 00:05:09,018 --> 00:05:10,018 Mmm. 101 00:05:12,013 --> 00:05:13,013 So... 102 00:05:13,020 --> 00:05:17,010 Saturday my firm is having its annual dinner thing. 103 00:05:17,022 --> 00:05:21,002 And I was wondering if you think that maybe the bar 104 00:05:21,004 --> 00:05:23,014 could spare you for a night, you could be my date. 105 00:05:23,011 --> 00:05:25,011 I warn you, it's going to be totally boring. 106 00:05:25,014 --> 00:05:27,014 It's not gonna be boring if I'm there with you. 107 00:05:34,011 --> 00:05:36,021 You probably should wear a suit. 108 00:05:36,020 --> 00:05:38,000 Oh! 109 00:05:38,020 --> 00:05:41,020 So it's gonna be a big fancy affair. 110 00:05:43,003 --> 00:05:44,023 You do have a suit, right? 111 00:05:45,002 --> 00:05:45,022 Sure I do. 112 00:05:46,001 --> 00:05:47,011 It's really nice. 113 00:05:47,008 --> 00:05:48,008 It's gold. 114 00:05:49,012 --> 00:05:50,022 It's gold? 115 00:05:50,019 --> 00:05:51,019 Yeah, you know, um... 116 00:05:52,014 --> 00:05:53,024 corduroy. 117 00:05:56,023 --> 00:05:58,023 What's wrong with corduroy? 118 00:05:59,000 --> 00:06:02,020 I don't have enough time to tell you what's wrong with corduroy. 119 00:06:06,011 --> 00:06:07,021 For the first time, 120 00:06:07,021 --> 00:06:10,011 Steve took Miranda back to his place. 121 00:06:12,022 --> 00:06:14,002 So... 122 00:06:14,007 --> 00:06:15,017 this is your apartment. 123 00:06:15,022 --> 00:06:17,002 Yeah. 124 00:06:17,004 --> 00:06:18,014 You like? 125 00:06:18,022 --> 00:06:20,022 It's sweet. 126 00:06:20,017 --> 00:06:23,997 I modeled it after De Niro's place in Taxi Driver . 127 00:06:26,001 --> 00:06:27,021 I'm kidding! 128 00:06:28,008 --> 00:06:29,008 Yeah, I... 129 00:06:30,004 --> 00:06:31,004 It's cheap. 130 00:06:31,002 --> 00:06:32,012 And it's near the bar. 131 00:06:32,023 --> 00:06:35,013 And you never have to come here again. 132 00:06:48,015 --> 00:06:53,005 That evening, Miranda experienced her first pangs of yuppie guilt. 133 00:06:53,023 --> 00:06:57,013 A lot of wonderful artists worked as bartenders for years. 134 00:06:57,012 --> 00:06:59,022 That doesn't mean he won't be making money someday. 135 00:07:00,000 --> 00:07:02,010 He's not an artist slash bartender. 136 00:07:02,015 --> 00:07:05,005 He's just happy being a bartender, period. 137 00:07:05,009 --> 00:07:07,019 No aspirations beyond shaking the cocktails 138 00:07:07,022 --> 00:07:09,022 and refilling the peanut bowls. 139 00:07:09,018 --> 00:07:10,998 How's he in bed? 140 00:07:12,001 --> 00:07:13,011 There are no words. 141 00:07:13,015 --> 00:07:15,015 Sounds like a dream relationship to me. 142 00:07:16,001 --> 00:07:17,001 Yeah, he can make you cum 143 00:07:17,006 --> 00:07:18,006 and then he can make you a Cosmopolitan. 144 00:07:19,021 --> 00:07:22,011 Honestly, I don't know how you can get serious with a guy 145 00:07:22,013 --> 00:07:24,023 whose entire future is based on tips. 146 00:07:24,022 --> 00:07:26,002 Wait a minute. 147 00:07:26,012 --> 00:07:29,022 Rich men date not so rich women all the time. 148 00:07:30,000 --> 00:07:31,020 I mean, come on, look at me and Big. 149 00:07:31,021 --> 00:07:34,011 It's not about money, it's about compatibility. 150 00:07:34,016 --> 00:07:37,006 Yeah, but it's normal for the guy to have more money. 151 00:07:37,009 --> 00:07:38,999 Oh, c'mon. -God. 152 00:07:39,006 --> 00:07:42,006 I know lots of women who make more money than their husbands. 153 00:07:42,011 --> 00:07:44,011 You're all missing my point. 154 00:07:44,009 --> 00:07:45,019 None of this matters to me. 155 00:07:46,000 --> 00:07:47,020 I just don't want it to matter to him. 156 00:07:47,018 --> 00:07:49,018 It's like when single men have a lot of money 157 00:07:49,023 --> 00:07:51,003 it works to their advantage. 158 00:07:51,002 --> 00:07:52,022 But when a single woman has money 159 00:07:52,019 --> 00:07:54,019 it's a problem you have to deal with. 160 00:07:54,021 --> 00:07:56,001 It's ridiculous. 161 00:07:56,005 --> 00:07:56,995 I want to enjoy my success, 162 00:07:57,004 --> 00:07:58,014 not apologize for it. 163 00:07:58,023 --> 00:08:00,023 Bravo, honey. Bravo. 164 00:08:01,011 --> 00:08:04,021 But you're talking about more than a difference in income. 165 00:08:04,021 --> 00:08:07,021 You're talking about a difference in background and education. 166 00:08:07,022 --> 00:08:09,022 This guy is working class. 167 00:08:09,019 --> 00:08:10,999 Working class? 168 00:08:11,006 --> 00:08:12,016 Yeah. -It's the millennium, sweetie. 169 00:08:12,021 --> 00:08:15,001 We don't say things like "working class" anymore. 170 00:08:15,004 --> 00:08:17,004 But you're trying to pretend that we live in 171 00:08:17,003 --> 00:08:20,013 a classless society, and we don't. 172 00:08:25,003 --> 00:08:27,013 Okay, Marie Antoinette, we get the picture. 173 00:08:28,007 --> 00:08:28,997 Thank you. 174 00:08:29,006 --> 00:08:30,006 You know, she's right. 175 00:08:30,019 --> 00:08:34,009 I'm dating a guy right now, and he's got an actual servant. 176 00:08:34,013 --> 00:08:35,023 What? 177 00:08:35,019 --> 00:08:36,019 -Really? -Yeah. 178 00:08:36,020 --> 00:08:38,010 It seems that Samantha 179 00:08:38,016 --> 00:08:39,996 was dating Harvey Terkell, 180 00:08:40,006 --> 00:08:41,006 a real estate investor 181 00:08:41,015 --> 00:08:43,005 who had just made a killing in the market 182 00:08:43,015 --> 00:08:45,995 turning Chelsea sweatshops into luxury co-ops 183 00:08:46,002 --> 00:08:47,012 for the upwardly trendy. 184 00:08:47,012 --> 00:08:49,022 Sum is a fantastic cook. 185 00:08:49,023 --> 00:08:52,013 You won't eat better Thai food in Bangkok. 186 00:08:52,010 --> 00:08:54,010 More cellophane noodles, Mr. Harvey? 187 00:08:54,012 --> 00:08:56,012 Yes, please. 188 00:08:57,019 --> 00:09:00,009 You like spicy like Mr. Harvey, miss? 189 00:09:00,012 --> 00:09:02,012 I love spicy. 190 00:09:02,008 --> 00:09:04,008 Enjoy. 191 00:09:05,005 --> 00:09:06,015 Isn't she the best? 192 00:09:06,022 --> 00:09:10,012 I tell you, I could not live without her. 193 00:09:10,016 --> 00:09:14,016 I wondered, was New York really any different from New Delhi? 194 00:09:14,020 --> 00:09:18,000 Had our class system been replaced by a caste system? 195 00:09:18,004 --> 00:09:22,024 And if so, can we date outside our caste? 196 00:09:22,017 --> 00:09:25,997 That night, Big took me out for a romantic dinner. 197 00:09:26,003 --> 00:09:27,013 I could smell it coming, 198 00:09:27,009 --> 00:09:28,019 the way you can smell a thunderstorm 199 00:09:28,023 --> 00:09:30,013 right before it hits. 200 00:09:30,011 --> 00:09:33,011 A mere two days after I had said, "I love you," 201 00:09:33,008 --> 00:09:37,008 Big had found his own way to say I love you to me. 202 00:09:37,007 --> 00:09:38,007 You're gonna love this. 203 00:09:38,018 --> 00:09:41,018 It's from a small winery in the heart of Tuscany. 204 00:09:43,013 --> 00:09:44,023 Mmm. 205 00:09:44,018 --> 00:09:46,008 Delicioso. 206 00:09:48,020 --> 00:09:51,010 I rented a villa there one summer with the ex. 207 00:09:52,004 --> 00:09:53,014 It was incredible. 208 00:09:56,003 --> 00:09:59,013 I've always wanted to go back with someone I actually liked. 209 00:10:03,002 --> 00:10:05,022 Listen... there's something I've been meaning to tell you 210 00:10:05,021 --> 00:10:08,011 ever since the night I gave you the purse. 211 00:10:10,015 --> 00:10:11,015 Yeah? 212 00:10:14,003 --> 00:10:16,023 You can take it back if you don't like it. 213 00:10:16,017 --> 00:10:19,007 That became the first night I wanted to tell Big, 214 00:10:20,003 --> 00:10:21,013 "I hate you." 215 00:10:26,001 --> 00:10:28,011 The next afternoon, Charlotte made the acquaintance 216 00:10:28,007 --> 00:10:30,017 of a member of the very highest caste. 217 00:10:30,019 --> 00:10:33,019 A caste that, from coast to coast, rich and poor, 218 00:10:34,000 --> 00:10:37,000 everyone deferred to and honored without question... 219 00:10:37,018 --> 00:10:39,008 the movie star. 220 00:10:42,004 --> 00:10:44,014 Hi. I'm Charlotte York, 221 00:10:44,009 --> 00:10:45,019 I'm the director of the gallery. 222 00:10:46,001 --> 00:10:48,001 Hi. Wylie Ford. 223 00:10:48,002 --> 00:10:49,022 Yeah. I know. 224 00:10:51,006 --> 00:10:52,996 How much for this piece? 225 00:10:54,002 --> 00:10:56,012 The fire extinguisher? 226 00:10:58,002 --> 00:10:59,012 Oh, no, no, no. 227 00:10:59,014 --> 00:11:01,024 That's a real fire extinguisher. 228 00:11:01,018 --> 00:11:03,998 You know, like for the gallery 229 00:11:04,002 --> 00:11:06,012 in case there's a fire. 230 00:11:08,012 --> 00:11:09,022 I guess I'm a total idiot. 231 00:11:09,020 --> 00:11:13,010 No, no, it happens all the time. 232 00:11:14,003 --> 00:11:16,013 You can have it. Take it. 233 00:11:16,007 --> 00:11:17,017 You can say you got it here at the gallery. 234 00:11:17,020 --> 00:11:22,020 And people will probably think it's a Jeff Koons. 235 00:11:23,022 --> 00:11:25,022 You are adorable. 236 00:11:26,021 --> 00:11:28,001 What do you think about closing up 237 00:11:28,004 --> 00:11:29,024 for the rest of the afternoon? 238 00:11:34,023 --> 00:11:37,003 Man, Charlene, you are so hot. 239 00:11:37,006 --> 00:11:38,996 I can't wait to get you to bed. 240 00:11:39,004 --> 00:11:40,014 Um... 241 00:11:40,007 --> 00:11:41,007 Charlotte. 242 00:11:41,011 --> 00:11:42,021 My name is Charlotte. 243 00:11:42,023 --> 00:11:45,003 Oh. I prefer Charlene. 244 00:11:45,004 --> 00:11:47,004 Okay. 245 00:11:50,000 --> 00:11:52,010 Oh, man, this champagne is running through me. 246 00:11:52,015 --> 00:11:55,995 Yo, bud, pull over, I need to take a leak. 247 00:12:02,005 --> 00:12:03,015 Sit tight, beautiful. 248 00:12:03,023 --> 00:12:05,003 Okay. 249 00:12:14,020 --> 00:12:15,020 Hello? 250 00:12:15,020 --> 00:12:17,020 You'll never believe where I am. 251 00:12:17,017 --> 00:12:21,007 I'm in the back of a limo about to go have sex with Wylie Ford. 252 00:12:21,016 --> 00:12:22,016 Where is he now? 253 00:12:22,019 --> 00:12:24,009 He's taking a leak out in the alley. 254 00:12:24,009 --> 00:12:25,019 Isn't that cute? 255 00:12:25,020 --> 00:12:27,000 Yeah, it's adorable. Now, Charlotte, 256 00:12:27,002 --> 00:12:28,002 listen to me. 257 00:12:28,002 --> 00:12:29,012 Get out of there immediately. 258 00:12:29,015 --> 00:12:31,005 All my rules just went right out the window. 259 00:12:32,001 --> 00:12:33,011 It's like he wants me. 260 00:12:33,022 --> 00:12:35,002 And I have to obey. 261 00:12:35,004 --> 00:12:38,014 Oh, he's zipping up, I gotta go. 262 00:12:41,002 --> 00:12:42,022 Hey, hey. -Hey. 263 00:12:48,017 --> 00:12:51,017 While Charlotte began to enjoy the perks of celebrity, 264 00:12:51,022 --> 00:12:53,022 Samantha discovered that Harvey Terkell 265 00:12:53,020 --> 00:12:56,010 came with some nice perks of his own. 266 00:12:56,015 --> 00:12:59,005 Now, you stay in bed as long as you want. 267 00:12:59,013 --> 00:13:00,023 And Sum will make you breakfast. 268 00:13:01,001 --> 00:13:03,001 Oh, that's really not necessary. 269 00:13:03,003 --> 00:13:04,003 What? No, no, no. 270 00:13:04,005 --> 00:13:06,005 Wait, please. She loves it. 271 00:13:06,020 --> 00:13:09,000 Do you like fresh orange or grapefruit? 272 00:13:09,005 --> 00:13:10,015 Hmm. Orange. 273 00:13:10,021 --> 00:13:13,001 -Orange. Eggs? 274 00:13:13,003 --> 00:13:14,023 -Coddled. 275 00:13:14,023 --> 00:13:16,013 Coming right up. 276 00:13:19,020 --> 00:13:20,020 I'll call you. 277 00:13:20,020 --> 00:13:22,010 Mm-hmm. 278 00:13:22,011 --> 00:13:24,021 While Samantha didn't believe in having servants, 279 00:13:24,020 --> 00:13:27,020 she realized she had no problem dating a man who did. 280 00:13:27,023 --> 00:13:29,023 She knew it might take some adjusting, 281 00:13:29,019 --> 00:13:31,019 but she could get used to this. 282 00:13:33,015 --> 00:13:34,995 Oh, bye, Sum. 283 00:13:35,006 --> 00:13:37,006 Now, take good care of Samantha. 284 00:13:38,010 --> 00:13:41,020 -Bye, bye, Mr. Harvey. -Oh, yes. 285 00:13:42,006 --> 00:13:43,006 Okay. 286 00:13:47,022 --> 00:13:50,012 Okay, lazy bones, out of bed. 287 00:13:50,014 --> 00:13:51,024 Excuse me? 288 00:13:52,000 --> 00:13:53,010 Up, up, must wash sheets. 289 00:13:53,013 --> 00:13:54,013 Okay. 290 00:13:55,002 --> 00:13:57,002 Should I have my breakfast in the dining room, or... 291 00:13:57,006 --> 00:14:00,006 Breakfast? I got no time to make breakfast. 292 00:14:00,008 --> 00:14:02,018 Got a lot of work to do around here. 293 00:14:06,016 --> 00:14:08,006 It was then that Samantha realized 294 00:14:08,015 --> 00:14:11,015 that Sum was not so servile after all. 295 00:14:11,020 --> 00:14:13,020 That afternoon, during her lunch break, 296 00:14:14,001 --> 00:14:15,021 Miranda took Steve shopping. 297 00:14:15,020 --> 00:14:17,010 -Thank you. -You're welcome. 298 00:14:17,016 --> 00:14:18,016 What do you think? 299 00:14:19,003 --> 00:14:21,013 I think it's kind of frightening how good I look. 300 00:14:21,015 --> 00:14:23,005 It's a beautiful suit. 301 00:14:23,018 --> 00:14:25,008 I think we should take it. 302 00:14:26,001 --> 00:14:28,011 Could you do a cuff with a nice little break? 303 00:14:28,007 --> 00:14:29,007 Will these be the shoes? 304 00:14:29,018 --> 00:14:31,008 I think we should take the shoes. 305 00:14:31,021 --> 00:14:33,021 Don't you think we should take the shoes? 306 00:14:34,007 --> 00:14:36,007 I guess we're taking the shoes. 307 00:14:38,015 --> 00:14:40,015 Uh-huh. Yeah. Just like that. 308 00:14:42,003 --> 00:14:43,013 Jesus. 309 00:14:43,014 --> 00:14:44,024 Eighteen hundred bucks. 310 00:14:45,008 --> 00:14:47,018 I guess I better not spill anything. 311 00:14:49,012 --> 00:14:51,022 Don't worry. It's my treat. 312 00:14:52,016 --> 00:14:53,006 What? 313 00:14:53,016 --> 00:14:54,016 I invited you to this thing, 314 00:14:54,023 --> 00:14:56,003 I want to pay for the suit. 315 00:14:56,004 --> 00:14:58,024 No way, you're not buying me a suit. 316 00:15:04,012 --> 00:15:06,022 But I wanted to do this for you. 317 00:15:07,012 --> 00:15:09,012 Then I start to think of you like my mother. 318 00:15:09,016 --> 00:15:12,006 And that can get a little weird for me. 319 00:15:13,003 --> 00:15:14,023 Sorry, sir, it was declined. 320 00:15:15,001 --> 00:15:16,011 Would you like to try another one? 321 00:15:16,014 --> 00:15:17,024 Why don't you try one of mine? 322 00:15:17,018 --> 00:15:19,018 No, no, no. How about this? 323 00:15:20,011 --> 00:15:23,001 Let's try $800 on the card, I'll write you a check for $1,000, 324 00:15:23,005 --> 00:15:24,015 and I'll give you the rest in cash. 325 00:15:24,021 --> 00:15:27,001 Steve, forget it. It's too expensive. 326 00:15:27,005 --> 00:15:30,005 Would you just let me buy the fucking suit? 327 00:15:35,015 --> 00:15:38,995 That Saturday, Big took me to a cocktail party 328 00:15:39,005 --> 00:15:40,995 at the home of Serena Bush. 329 00:15:41,005 --> 00:15:43,005 Great purse, fabulous. 330 00:15:43,011 --> 00:15:44,021 Careful. 331 00:15:44,021 --> 00:15:46,011 White rugs. 332 00:15:46,009 --> 00:15:47,019 An Upper East Side hostess 333 00:15:47,018 --> 00:15:49,008 famous for her husband's money 334 00:15:49,007 --> 00:15:51,017 and a close personal friendship with Tina Brown. 335 00:15:52,000 --> 00:15:53,010 I used to know her ten years ago 336 00:15:53,010 --> 00:15:55,010 when she was famous for her father's money 337 00:15:55,008 --> 00:15:57,998 and a close personal friendship with her drug dealer. 338 00:15:58,007 --> 00:16:00,017 Oh, God, I hate Park Avenue. 339 00:16:00,021 --> 00:16:03,011 It's like being in a foreign country. 340 00:16:03,017 --> 00:16:05,997 Just think of me as your passport, baby. 341 00:16:06,005 --> 00:16:07,015 As we walked through the room 342 00:16:07,023 --> 00:16:10,013 of women clutching their bejeweled swan kitten 343 00:16:10,008 --> 00:16:12,008 and asparagus purses, 344 00:16:12,011 --> 00:16:14,001 I realized, to my horror, 345 00:16:14,006 --> 00:16:16,006 that not only did Big not love me, 346 00:16:16,007 --> 00:16:19,997 he had absolutely no idea who I was. 347 00:16:20,003 --> 00:16:21,003 Can I get you a drink? 348 00:16:21,004 --> 00:16:22,024 Yeah, Tanqueray and tonic. 349 00:16:22,022 --> 00:16:24,002 Carrie, a drink? 350 00:16:24,014 --> 00:16:27,014 Oh, red wine please. 351 00:16:27,015 --> 00:16:31,005 I'm sorry, Miss Bush doesn't serve any brown food or drink. 352 00:16:31,022 --> 00:16:33,012 Can I get you something clear? 353 00:16:35,019 --> 00:16:37,009 Uh... yeah. 354 00:16:37,021 --> 00:16:39,001 Vodka on the rocks. 355 00:16:41,008 --> 00:16:43,008 No brown food? 356 00:16:43,014 --> 00:16:45,024 I think we've just encountered a mutant strain 357 00:16:45,023 --> 00:16:47,023 of Upper East Side anal. 358 00:16:48,004 --> 00:16:49,014 She's a little strange. 359 00:16:49,009 --> 00:16:50,019 I've known her for years. She's okay. 360 00:16:51,000 --> 00:16:52,000 Oh, yeah, I'm sure she's fabulous 361 00:16:52,004 --> 00:16:53,014 until you spill something. 362 00:16:53,011 --> 00:16:54,021 It's like she's consciously trying 363 00:16:54,022 --> 00:16:57,002 to cultivate an eccentricity so people won't notice 364 00:16:57,004 --> 00:16:59,024 that she's completely devoid of personality. 365 00:17:00,012 --> 00:17:01,022 Well, don't be a bitch. 366 00:17:01,020 --> 00:17:03,010 I'm not being a bitch, I'm just being myself. 367 00:17:03,011 --> 00:17:05,001 You're being a little bit of a bitch. 368 00:17:05,004 --> 00:17:06,014 Sweetheart. 369 00:17:06,021 --> 00:17:08,001 -How are you? -Hey! 370 00:17:08,002 --> 00:17:10,002 It's been forever. 371 00:17:11,023 --> 00:17:13,013 Thank you for having us. 372 00:17:13,015 --> 00:17:15,005 Serena, you know Carrie. 373 00:17:15,015 --> 00:17:16,015 Yes. 374 00:17:16,023 --> 00:17:18,003 Hey. 375 00:17:18,013 --> 00:17:19,023 Uh, darling... 376 00:17:20,014 --> 00:17:21,024 can't smoke in here. 377 00:17:21,020 --> 00:17:24,010 No, no. Terrace. 378 00:17:24,017 --> 00:17:27,007 Then that's where I'll be. 379 00:17:27,015 --> 00:17:32,015 And just like that, I was cast out of the fancy party. 380 00:17:32,018 --> 00:17:35,008 That same evening, Charlotte found herself the newest member 381 00:17:35,016 --> 00:17:37,006 of Wylie Ford's entourage. 382 00:17:37,016 --> 00:17:41,006 When did marijuana become legal in restaurants? 383 00:17:42,019 --> 00:17:43,999 It didn't. 384 00:17:46,020 --> 00:17:48,020 -Here. -Oh, no, thank you. 385 00:17:49,000 --> 00:17:51,000 I don't smoke pot. 386 00:17:55,003 --> 00:17:57,003 -You do now. 387 00:18:09,010 --> 00:18:10,010 You know... 388 00:18:10,018 --> 00:18:13,008 Sum was very rude to me the other morning. 389 00:18:13,016 --> 00:18:16,006 She practically threw me out of bed. 390 00:18:16,022 --> 00:18:18,002 No, no, no. 391 00:18:18,008 --> 00:18:19,008 You must have misunderstood. 392 00:18:19,013 --> 00:18:21,023 Her English isn't really that good. 393 00:18:21,018 --> 00:18:22,998 Shh, shh. 394 00:18:26,002 --> 00:18:28,002 More asparagus, miss? 395 00:18:28,002 --> 00:18:34,012 It was then Samantha realized she wasn't so dim, that Sum. 396 00:18:34,009 --> 00:18:37,019 That night I realized that relationships had a caste system of their own. 397 00:18:38,001 --> 00:18:40,011 There's the person who says I love you. 398 00:18:40,009 --> 00:18:42,019 And there's the person who never responds. 399 00:18:42,021 --> 00:18:43,021 Carrie. 400 00:18:44,021 --> 00:18:45,021 Hey. 401 00:18:46,008 --> 00:18:47,018 Jeremiah. 402 00:18:48,003 --> 00:18:49,013 What are you doing here? 403 00:18:50,003 --> 00:18:51,023 Purveying the beverages. 404 00:18:52,004 --> 00:18:54,024 -Just snuck out here to smoke, actually. -Ah, good. 405 00:18:54,022 --> 00:18:57,012 Are you friends with these people? 406 00:18:57,009 --> 00:18:58,019 Oh, God, no. No. 407 00:18:58,022 --> 00:19:00,012 Yeah. A little uptight. 408 00:19:00,012 --> 00:19:02,012 What's with the no brown food deal? 409 00:19:02,007 --> 00:19:03,017 Whatever. 410 00:19:03,018 --> 00:19:06,008 Jeremiah was a famous downtown performance artist 411 00:19:06,009 --> 00:19:07,019 who was best known uptown as, 412 00:19:08,001 --> 00:19:10,001 "Hey kid, let me have another scotch and soda." 413 00:19:10,002 --> 00:19:12,022 We had engaged in a mild flirtation for years. 414 00:19:13,004 --> 00:19:14,014 So, who are you here with? 415 00:19:14,012 --> 00:19:17,002 Oh, some guy. 416 00:19:18,012 --> 00:19:20,012 Hey. I just got a new tattoo, you want to see it? 417 00:19:20,014 --> 00:19:21,024 -Yeah. -Yeah? 418 00:19:21,020 --> 00:19:22,020 Sure. 419 00:19:25,007 --> 00:19:25,997 Is that real? 420 00:19:26,006 --> 00:19:27,006 Yeah, it's real. 421 00:19:27,009 --> 00:19:28,019 Wowsa. 422 00:19:28,018 --> 00:19:30,018 How far down does that go? 423 00:19:32,012 --> 00:19:33,022 Pretty far. 424 00:19:34,006 --> 00:19:35,006 Check it out. 425 00:19:39,000 --> 00:19:40,000 Oh. 426 00:19:41,010 --> 00:19:42,010 Holy moly. 427 00:19:42,016 --> 00:19:45,006 -Ahem. -Shit. 428 00:19:46,000 --> 00:19:47,020 Excuse me. 429 00:19:49,019 --> 00:19:50,999 Ah, shit. 430 00:20:08,023 --> 00:20:10,003 Uh... 431 00:20:10,020 --> 00:20:13,000 Were you really out there giving the caterer a blow job? 432 00:20:13,006 --> 00:20:15,006 First of all, he's not a caterer. 433 00:20:15,015 --> 00:20:17,015 He's a very well-known performance artist. 434 00:20:17,021 --> 00:20:18,021 Oh! 435 00:20:19,001 --> 00:20:21,001 Well, that didn't answer my question. 436 00:20:21,003 --> 00:20:22,023 Because it was offensive. 437 00:20:23,015 --> 00:20:27,005 Well, whatever you were doing, please stop. 438 00:20:27,013 --> 00:20:28,023 You're embarrassing me. 439 00:20:28,022 --> 00:20:30,022 I'm embarrassing you? 440 00:20:30,021 --> 00:20:33,011 Well, maybe if you'd join me on the terrace like a gentleman 441 00:20:33,013 --> 00:20:36,013 we wouldn't be standing here having this conversation. 442 00:20:36,010 --> 00:20:37,010 Let's just go. 443 00:20:37,013 --> 00:20:40,003 No, you go, I'm having a good time. 444 00:20:45,004 --> 00:20:48,024 And across town, Miranda was late for the firm dinner. 445 00:20:50,023 --> 00:20:52,013 Okay. 446 00:20:58,018 --> 00:21:00,008 Why are you dressed like that? 447 00:21:00,020 --> 00:21:02,020 I returned the suit. 448 00:21:03,017 --> 00:21:05,017 Frankly, I couldn't afford it. 449 00:21:06,015 --> 00:21:08,015 Then why didn't you let me pay for it? 450 00:21:08,022 --> 00:21:13,022 Miranda, you need to be with a guy who's more on your level. 451 00:21:14,007 --> 00:21:14,997 Steve. 452 00:21:15,005 --> 00:21:16,015 Being in that store with you, 453 00:21:18,004 --> 00:21:20,014 I didn't feel good about myself. 454 00:21:21,013 --> 00:21:24,013 Look, I think you're an incredible lady. 455 00:21:25,002 --> 00:21:27,022 You want to break up with me over a suit? 456 00:21:29,001 --> 00:21:30,021 Fuck the suit. 457 00:21:31,015 --> 00:21:33,005 It's not just the suit. 458 00:21:34,011 --> 00:21:37,001 There's always gonna be things out of my reach. 459 00:21:38,021 --> 00:21:41,011 So I'm being punished for being successful. 460 00:21:43,001 --> 00:21:44,021 That's not how I mean it. 461 00:21:46,012 --> 00:21:47,012 Got it. 462 00:21:48,006 --> 00:21:49,006 Well... 463 00:21:50,002 --> 00:21:52,022 thanks for the info and standing me up. 464 00:21:52,019 --> 00:21:54,009 And it's been nice knowing you. 465 00:21:55,013 --> 00:21:56,023 An hour later, 466 00:21:56,021 --> 00:21:59,021 adrift in a sea of Italian wool crepe, 467 00:21:59,018 --> 00:22:03,008 Miranda wondered what was really so wrong with corduroy anyway. 468 00:22:07,007 --> 00:22:08,017 In the space of one evening, 469 00:22:08,022 --> 00:22:12,022 Charlotte had gone from girlfriend to groupie. 470 00:22:13,008 --> 00:22:14,018 Who had the rum and Coke? 471 00:22:27,009 --> 00:22:29,009 Listen... Charlene. 472 00:22:29,023 --> 00:22:32,003 I want you to do something for me. 473 00:22:32,020 --> 00:22:34,020 I want you to go to the ladies' room, 474 00:22:35,004 --> 00:22:40,024 stick your finger in your pussy, come back, and let me smell it. 475 00:22:49,002 --> 00:22:50,022 I don't think so. 476 00:22:54,020 --> 00:22:56,010 -Excuse me. -Charlene? 477 00:22:56,015 --> 00:22:58,995 Charlotte realized another moment at the top 478 00:22:59,002 --> 00:23:01,012 and she would have become an untouchable. 479 00:23:03,011 --> 00:23:06,011 ♪ Jeremiah was a bullfrog ♪ 480 00:23:06,007 --> 00:23:07,007 ♪ Bah, bah, bah ♪ 481 00:23:07,008 --> 00:23:09,008 ♪ Was a good friend of mine ♪ 482 00:23:09,013 --> 00:23:10,023 ♪ Bah, bah, bah ♪ 483 00:23:10,022 --> 00:23:14,002 ♪ I never understood A single word he said ♪ 484 00:23:14,003 --> 00:23:15,013 ♪ But I helped him... ♪ 485 00:23:15,007 --> 00:23:17,007 After Jeremiah got fired, 486 00:23:17,015 --> 00:23:18,015 we celebrated downtown 487 00:23:18,022 --> 00:23:21,002 with a couple of pitchers of margaritas. 488 00:23:21,003 --> 00:23:23,013 ♪ Joy to the world ♪ 489 00:23:23,011 --> 00:23:24,011 Yeah! 490 00:23:24,011 --> 00:23:27,001 ♪ All the boys and girls ♪ 491 00:23:28,006 --> 00:23:29,016 ♪ Joy to... ♪ 492 00:23:36,020 --> 00:23:39,010 ♪ Joy to the fishes In the deep blue sea ♪ 493 00:23:39,015 --> 00:23:41,005 I don't live here. Whoa. Whoa! 494 00:23:41,012 --> 00:23:42,022 ♪ Joy to you and me ♪ 495 00:23:42,023 --> 00:23:45,013 That was the last thing I could remember that night. 496 00:23:45,008 --> 00:23:47,998 ♪ If I were the king of the world ♪ 497 00:23:53,004 --> 00:23:54,024 -You just relax. -I will. 498 00:23:55,001 --> 00:23:56,021 I'm gonna go grab a shower. 499 00:23:56,022 --> 00:23:58,002 Oh. 500 00:24:05,003 --> 00:24:06,013 Excuse me. 501 00:24:07,005 --> 00:24:08,005 Nasty. 502 00:24:09,000 --> 00:24:10,010 Nasty girl. 503 00:24:10,021 --> 00:24:13,011 You dirty cock-sucking whore. 504 00:24:15,000 --> 00:24:17,010 Must wash sheets right away. 505 00:24:17,013 --> 00:24:19,023 Stop it! Let go. 506 00:24:20,001 --> 00:24:22,001 You're crazy. Oh! 507 00:24:22,006 --> 00:24:23,016 What's going on out here? 508 00:24:24,013 --> 00:24:26,013 Mr. Harvey. 509 00:24:26,009 --> 00:24:28,009 I'm so sorry. 510 00:24:28,022 --> 00:24:33,012 I just tried to wash the sheets, but that lady hit me. 511 00:24:33,011 --> 00:24:35,001 Oh, come on! 512 00:24:35,003 --> 00:24:37,003 How dare you treat Sum that way. 513 00:24:37,004 --> 00:24:38,014 Let me explain. 514 00:24:38,011 --> 00:24:39,011 No! 515 00:24:39,014 --> 00:24:41,014 There's no explanation. 516 00:24:42,002 --> 00:24:44,022 Just get out of here. 517 00:24:44,018 --> 00:24:46,018 Samantha realized that there was only room 518 00:24:46,022 --> 00:24:48,002 for one woman in Harvey's life. 519 00:24:48,005 --> 00:24:48,995 Shh, shh. 520 00:24:54,012 --> 00:24:55,012 Oh, Jesus. 521 00:24:59,002 --> 00:25:00,012 Hello? 522 00:25:00,010 --> 00:25:01,010 Listen... 523 00:25:01,019 --> 00:25:03,999 I know what you're really pissed off about. 524 00:25:04,018 --> 00:25:08,018 But it's just something I've gotta do in my own time. 525 00:25:10,012 --> 00:25:11,012 Okay? 526 00:25:14,000 --> 00:25:16,000 Well, I fucking love you. 527 00:25:16,002 --> 00:25:18,012 All right? You know I do. 528 00:25:18,019 --> 00:25:19,019 Hey, good morning. 529 00:25:20,001 --> 00:25:23,001 It's just a tough thing for me to say 530 00:25:23,020 --> 00:25:28,000 because it always seems to get me in trouble when I say it. 531 00:25:28,017 --> 00:25:29,017 Okay? 532 00:25:30,019 --> 00:25:31,019 Okay. 533 00:25:33,006 --> 00:25:34,016 Are we okay? 534 00:25:36,018 --> 00:25:37,018 We're great. 535 00:25:39,005 --> 00:25:40,015 Hey, I love you too. 536 00:25:41,010 --> 00:25:43,000 I'll call you later, okay? 537 00:25:52,014 --> 00:25:53,024 Did we? 538 00:25:56,002 --> 00:25:57,022 Definitely not. 539 00:25:58,014 --> 00:26:00,004 I didn't think so. 540 00:26:06,020 --> 00:26:09,020 I felt like I was the lowest of the low. 541 00:26:09,019 --> 00:26:11,009 But I never told Mr. Big. 542 00:26:11,008 --> 00:26:13,008 I figured everything before "I love you" 543 00:26:13,016 --> 00:26:14,016 just doesn't count.