1
00:00:57,375 --> 00:00:59,166
[Carrie] Let's be honest.
2
00:00:59,250 --> 00:01:01,291
Sometimes there is
nothing harder in life
3
00:01:01,375 --> 00:01:03,750
than being happy
for somebody else.
4
00:01:03,834 --> 00:01:05,333
Like lottery winners
5
00:01:05,417 --> 00:01:09,792
or extremely successful
people who are twenty-seven.
6
00:01:09,875 --> 00:01:12,417
And then there's
that hell on earth
7
00:01:12,500 --> 00:01:15,750
that only your closest
friends can inflict on you.
8
00:01:16,792 --> 00:01:19,166
The baby shower.
9
00:01:19,250 --> 00:01:20,458
You could not drag
me to that thing
10
00:01:20,542 --> 00:01:22,792
if you put a grappling
hook in my mouth.
11
00:01:22,875 --> 00:01:24,333
Frankly, I think it's sad.
12
00:01:24,417 --> 00:01:27,250
The way she's using a child
to validate her existence.
13
00:01:27,333 --> 00:01:28,125
Exactly.
14
00:01:28,208 --> 00:01:29,417
Why can't she just use sex
15
00:01:29,500 --> 00:01:31,041
and a nice cocktail
like the rest of us?
16
00:01:31,125 --> 00:01:33,417
[Charlotte] I'm happy for her.
I am.
17
00:01:33,500 --> 00:01:34,917
If I see another
crepe paper stork,
18
00:01:35,000 --> 00:01:37,250
I'm gonna rip its
cardboard beak off.
19
00:01:37,333 --> 00:01:38,250
Can I ask you...
20
00:01:38,333 --> 00:01:39,917
would any baby shower bother you
21
00:01:40,000 --> 00:01:42,959
or is this one worse
because it's Laney's?
22
00:01:50,208 --> 00:01:51,583
[Carrie] Laney Berlin.
23
00:01:51,667 --> 00:01:53,000
You can't really describe he.
24
00:01:53,083 --> 00:01:54,250
You just had to know her.
25
00:01:54,333 --> 00:01:56,417
[screams]
26
00:01:56,500 --> 00:01:59,959
Chances are eight years ago,
you probably did.
27
00:02:00,834 --> 00:02:02,083
So help me.
28
00:02:02,166 --> 00:02:03,625
She fucks on my couch,
29
00:02:03,709 --> 00:02:04,750
she buys it.
30
00:02:05,041 --> 00:02:07,125
Isn't that how you
got the couch from me?
31
00:02:07,208 --> 00:02:09,291
[man] Hey, Laney,
show us your tits!
32
00:02:09,375 --> 00:02:10,458
Oh, give it a rest.
33
00:02:10,542 --> 00:02:12,875
You guys have seen enough
of my tits.
34
00:02:14,542 --> 00:02:17,792
[cheering]
35
00:02:17,875 --> 00:02:20,417
[Carrie] Laney did A&R
for a record label,
36
00:02:20,500 --> 00:02:23,625
or as she used to call it,
sex with an expense account.
37
00:02:23,709 --> 00:02:25,583
Every time she went
on a scouting trip,
38
00:02:25,667 --> 00:02:27,291
she came back with
some hot new group
39
00:02:27,375 --> 00:02:30,792
and a gynecological condition
no one had ever heard of.
40
00:02:30,875 --> 00:02:33,375
Those things make so
many public appearances,
41
00:02:33,458 --> 00:02:35,375
they need a booking agent.
42
00:02:39,542 --> 00:02:40,583
[Samantha] Look at her.
43
00:02:40,667 --> 00:02:42,625
The poster girl
for low self-esteem.
44
00:02:42,709 --> 00:02:45,792
You know, I have low self-esteem
but I express it the healthy way
45
00:02:45,875 --> 00:02:47,750
by eating a box of
Double Stuf Oreos.
46
00:02:47,834 --> 00:02:50,625
She's so sad.
47
00:02:50,709 --> 00:02:51,625
[chanting]
48
00:02:51,709 --> 00:02:53,333
Take it off!
49
00:02:53,417 --> 00:02:55,166
[cheering]
50
00:02:55,250 --> 00:02:58,375
[Carrie] Samantha and Laney had
a long standing rivalry.
51
00:02:58,458 --> 00:03:00,625
Both wild, both sexy.
52
00:03:00,709 --> 00:03:03,583
Both incredibly insecure.
53
00:03:03,667 --> 00:03:07,625
Two years ago, Laney did
the most shocking thing of all.
54
00:03:07,709 --> 00:03:10,250
She met a Wall Street
investment banker,
55
00:03:10,333 --> 00:03:12,542
married him and
moved to Connecticut.
56
00:03:12,625 --> 00:03:14,250
That wasn't supposed to happen.
57
00:03:14,333 --> 00:03:16,166
She was supposed to
have sex with Sid Vicious
58
00:03:16,250 --> 00:03:17,792
and move to heroin.
59
00:03:20,375 --> 00:03:21,959
Come on, you guys,
it'll be fun.
60
00:03:22,041 --> 00:03:24,500
We've never even been to
visit her in Connecticut.
61
00:03:24,583 --> 00:03:25,834
Exactly.
There's a reason for that.
62
00:03:25,917 --> 00:03:27,834
-Lyme disease?
-That's another good one.
63
00:03:27,917 --> 00:03:29,625
But it's a baby shower.
64
00:03:29,709 --> 00:03:30,875
No, it's a cult.
65
00:03:30,959 --> 00:03:32,625
It's a cult?
What are you talking about?
66
00:03:32,709 --> 00:03:33,792
Listen to me.
67
00:03:33,875 --> 00:03:36,125
They all think the same,
dress the same
68
00:03:36,208 --> 00:03:38,458
and sacrifice themselves
to the same cause:
69
00:03:38,542 --> 00:03:39,458
babies.
70
00:03:39,542 --> 00:03:40,750
She's insane.
71
00:03:40,834 --> 00:03:43,542
Hey, I've lost two
sisters to the motherhood.
72
00:03:43,625 --> 00:03:45,125
I know what I'm talking about.
73
00:03:45,208 --> 00:03:47,709
I think we should go,
it's the right thing to do.
74
00:03:47,792 --> 00:03:49,375
Give me one good reason.
75
00:03:49,458 --> 00:03:50,667
Okay,
76
00:03:50,750 --> 00:03:52,709
you're driving down
the road, you see a sign,
77
00:03:52,792 --> 00:03:54,375
it says, "Two-headed snake."
78
00:03:54,458 --> 00:03:55,709
You pull over.
79
00:03:55,792 --> 00:03:58,834
Wild Laney is having a
baby shower, you pull over.
80
00:03:58,917 --> 00:04:01,667
She's got a point.
It's the right thing to do.
81
00:04:01,750 --> 00:04:05,375
Just imagine how
fat she must be.
82
00:04:05,458 --> 00:04:07,375
[Carrie] As I penciled in
the date,
83
00:04:07,458 --> 00:04:10,166
I noticed something missing.
84
00:04:10,250 --> 00:04:13,458
In between the Versace
show and dinner at Moomba,
85
00:04:13,542 --> 00:04:15,417
there it wasn't.
86
00:04:15,500 --> 00:04:17,792
My period... four days late.
87
00:04:19,083 --> 00:04:20,000
That Saturday,
88
00:04:20,083 --> 00:04:21,583
also known as seven days late,
89
00:04:21,667 --> 00:04:25,000
four city girls set off
to visit the country mice.
90
00:04:25,083 --> 00:04:27,333
Are we there yet?
91
00:04:29,166 --> 00:04:30,667
I've already had
two of these,
92
00:04:30,750 --> 00:04:32,291
so we're gonna
be stopping a lot.
93
00:04:32,375 --> 00:04:34,500
[laughs] Hey, nice outfit.
94
00:04:34,583 --> 00:04:36,333
Is there gonna be some
belly dancing at the shower?
95
00:04:36,417 --> 00:04:38,083
Yeah, right after the gifts.
96
00:04:38,166 --> 00:04:40,750
Oh, shit.
I totally spaced.
97
00:04:40,834 --> 00:04:42,458
I forgot to buy her a present.
98
00:04:43,375 --> 00:04:44,959
How tacky is it to
give the mother to be
99
00:04:45,041 --> 00:04:46,166
a fistful of cash?
100
00:04:46,250 --> 00:04:47,709
Oh, don't worry about it.
101
00:04:47,792 --> 00:04:49,291
You can go in on mine.
102
00:04:49,375 --> 00:04:52,333
You bought a pregnant
woman a bottle of scotch?
103
00:04:52,417 --> 00:04:53,959
The invitation said BYOB.
104
00:04:54,041 --> 00:04:56,792
That meant bring your own baby.
105
00:04:56,875 --> 00:04:58,875
-What did you get her?
-Condoms.
106
00:04:58,959 --> 00:05:00,625
Seriously, what'd you get her?
107
00:05:00,709 --> 00:05:01,709
Seriously.
108
00:05:01,792 --> 00:05:03,542
They're pastel.
109
00:05:04,000 --> 00:05:05,917
-Oh.
-[Charlotte] Hey, guys!
Wait, wait!
110
00:05:06,000 --> 00:05:08,333
Hey, guys, wait for me!
111
00:05:08,417 --> 00:05:09,959
-Oh, my God.
-[Charlotte] Wait!
112
00:05:10,041 --> 00:05:11,709
[Miranda] Look at the size
of that thing.
113
00:05:11,792 --> 00:05:13,083
We can drive that
to Connecticut.
114
00:05:13,166 --> 00:05:14,959
I'm putting my
name on that card.
115
00:05:15,041 --> 00:05:16,000
[Charlotte] All right.
116
00:05:16,083 --> 00:05:18,083
[Carrie] Go, go, go, go, go.
117
00:05:23,125 --> 00:05:25,208
Does anybody know how to drive?
118
00:05:30,458 --> 00:05:33,417
[Carrie] As I turned
the mid-size coupe on to
Holly Hock lane,
119
00:05:33,500 --> 00:05:36,458
I was struck by how a
place so filled with nature
120
00:05:36,542 --> 00:05:38,917
could look so unnatural.
121
00:05:39,917 --> 00:05:42,083
[dog whimpers]
122
00:05:48,250 --> 00:05:49,333
Oh, Toto.
123
00:05:49,417 --> 00:05:51,917
I don't think we're in
Manhattan anymore.
124
00:05:52,834 --> 00:05:55,333
[gasps] Oh, her house
is beautiful.
125
00:05:55,417 --> 00:05:58,083
Oh, and look at her dog.
126
00:05:58,166 --> 00:05:59,417
Hey, boy.
127
00:05:59,500 --> 00:06:01,166
Hey, boy, come here, boy.
128
00:06:01,250 --> 00:06:02,291
Come here, boy.
129
00:06:02,375 --> 00:06:03,667
[sound of electric current]
130
00:06:03,750 --> 00:06:05,083
[dog whimpers, barks]
131
00:06:08,041 --> 00:06:09,333
Why didn't he come?
132
00:06:09,417 --> 00:06:11,208
Invisible electric fencing.
133
00:06:11,291 --> 00:06:12,458
It's the latest thing.
134
00:06:12,542 --> 00:06:14,250
My sister has it.
135
00:06:14,333 --> 00:06:15,500
Okay.
136
00:06:15,583 --> 00:06:17,166
Ready, girls?
137
00:06:18,125 --> 00:06:19,125
Let's go.
138
00:06:24,750 --> 00:06:27,000
Ooh, Charlotte, sweetie,
don't forget our gift.
139
00:06:27,458 --> 00:06:28,625
Come on.
140
00:06:31,917 --> 00:06:33,125
[knocking on door]
141
00:06:37,125 --> 00:06:40,375
[screaming]
142
00:06:40,458 --> 00:06:42,500
Oh, look at you, you're huge.
143
00:06:42,583 --> 00:06:43,917
I know, isn't it great?
144
00:06:44,000 --> 00:06:46,041
I can eat anything I want.
Jealous?
145
00:06:46,125 --> 00:06:47,458
-[laughs]
-Come on in.
146
00:06:47,542 --> 00:06:49,083
Come in, come in.
147
00:06:50,041 --> 00:06:52,917
Brigid, Roxanne, these are
my friends from the city.
148
00:06:53,000 --> 00:06:55,208
-[Carrie] Hi.
-We didn't think you'd make it.
149
00:06:55,291 --> 00:06:56,375
Oh, we got lost.
150
00:06:56,458 --> 00:06:57,625
We took the wrong bridge.
151
00:06:57,709 --> 00:06:59,166
Oh, remember that feeling
like if you left
152
00:06:59,250 --> 00:07:00,917
Manhattan even for a second,
153
00:07:01,000 --> 00:07:02,375
you'd fall off
the edge of the Earth?
154
00:07:02,458 --> 00:07:04,750
Oh, God, don't remind me.
155
00:07:04,834 --> 00:07:05,709
Hi.
156
00:07:05,792 --> 00:07:06,750
Oh, my God.
157
00:07:06,834 --> 00:07:08,959
It's the Bellini baby basket.
158
00:07:09,041 --> 00:07:09,917
[women] Aww!
159
00:07:10,000 --> 00:07:11,125
Oh, look.
160
00:07:11,208 --> 00:07:14,750
Everybody,
it's the Bellini baby basket.
161
00:07:14,834 --> 00:07:16,709
Speaking of bellini's,
162
00:07:16,792 --> 00:07:18,667
I'm gonna have a big drink.
163
00:07:19,083 --> 00:07:20,166
Jealous?
164
00:07:22,458 --> 00:07:25,583
Is she still bar hopping
and bed hopping?
165
00:07:25,667 --> 00:07:27,417
It's so sad, isn't it?
166
00:07:27,500 --> 00:07:29,000
When that's all you have.
167
00:07:29,458 --> 00:07:31,250
Okay, this is Rebecca.
168
00:07:31,333 --> 00:07:32,583
-Hi.
-[Miranda] Hi.
169
00:07:32,667 --> 00:07:33,583
[Laney] Susan.
170
00:07:33,667 --> 00:07:34,625
-Hello.
-Hello.
171
00:07:34,709 --> 00:07:35,583
-[Laney] Mindy.
-Hey.
172
00:07:35,667 --> 00:07:36,709
Don't get up, sweetheart.
173
00:07:36,792 --> 00:07:38,125
She's doing this in vitro thing.
174
00:07:38,208 --> 00:07:40,709
She's not supposed
to move at all.
175
00:07:41,458 --> 00:07:43,291
And that's Betsy
and her boy, Harry.
176
00:07:43,375 --> 00:07:45,667
They're inseparable.
They do everything together.
177
00:07:45,750 --> 00:07:47,375
We call them our
old married couple.
178
00:07:47,458 --> 00:07:49,041
Except it's not
really that funny
179
00:07:49,125 --> 00:07:51,542
now that Betsy and her
husband are getting divorced.
180
00:07:51,625 --> 00:07:53,542
[woman] Laney,
we need you.
181
00:07:54,834 --> 00:07:57,709
So, all I have to do
to meet the ideal man is...
182
00:07:58,083 --> 00:07:59,542
give birth to him.
183
00:08:00,041 --> 00:08:01,542
I love my son.
184
00:08:01,625 --> 00:08:02,875
Andy's eleven months old.
185
00:08:02,959 --> 00:08:06,208
He is a God and
I tell him so every day.
186
00:08:08,917 --> 00:08:10,291
Thirty years from now,
187
00:08:10,375 --> 00:08:12,333
what do you think the
chances are that some woman's
188
00:08:12,417 --> 00:08:14,792
gonna be able
to make Andy happy?
189
00:08:14,875 --> 00:08:16,500
I'm gonna go with zero.
190
00:08:17,250 --> 00:08:19,166
[guests swoon]
191
00:08:20,041 --> 00:08:23,125
Oh, it's adorable.
192
00:08:23,208 --> 00:08:24,750
Look at that Charlotte.
193
00:08:24,834 --> 00:08:27,000
Oh, I wish they made
this in my size.
194
00:08:27,083 --> 00:08:27,834
[women laugh]
195
00:08:27,917 --> 00:08:29,208
I told you, it's a cult.
196
00:08:29,291 --> 00:08:30,625
We can't separate.
197
00:08:30,709 --> 00:08:33,208
Once they isolate you
from the herd, it's all over.
198
00:08:33,291 --> 00:08:36,291
[Carrie] As I watched Laney tear
open a terry cloth baby bib
199
00:08:36,375 --> 00:08:38,792
with the same enthusiasm she
once reserved for tearing off
200
00:08:38,875 --> 00:08:42,208
rock stars' pants,
I couldn't help but wonder...
201
00:08:43,250 --> 00:08:45,000
was I next?
202
00:08:45,083 --> 00:08:46,625
[gasps]
203
00:08:47,250 --> 00:08:49,250
You know what, I have to pee.
204
00:08:49,333 --> 00:08:52,917
If you're not back in five
minutes, I'm coming after you.
205
00:08:56,417 --> 00:08:59,250
[Carrie] The truth is I needed
to escape.
206
00:08:59,333 --> 00:09:01,834
The party had
turned into a preview,
207
00:09:01,917 --> 00:09:05,458
a preview of a life I didn't
know if I was ready for.
208
00:09:11,458 --> 00:09:13,333
Even seven months pregnant,
209
00:09:13,417 --> 00:09:15,583
Laney couldn't keep
her clothes on.
210
00:09:15,667 --> 00:09:18,959
Clearly a part of the
old Laney had survived.
211
00:09:19,041 --> 00:09:21,291
But I wondered,
what was still buried
212
00:09:21,375 --> 00:09:23,667
deep inside
the mommies downstairs?
213
00:09:23,959 --> 00:09:27,709
Before I married my husband,
I slept around with everybody.
214
00:09:27,792 --> 00:09:30,291
Now I have an internet lover.
215
00:09:30,625 --> 00:09:32,625
-No one knows.
-[baby hiccups]
216
00:09:34,000 --> 00:09:35,667
When I was
senior vice president,
217
00:09:35,750 --> 00:09:38,750
212 people reported
to me on a daily basis.
218
00:09:38,834 --> 00:09:40,959
Now I just yell
at the gardener...
219
00:09:41,041 --> 00:09:43,458
who doesn't understand
a single word.
220
00:09:44,792 --> 00:09:46,625
I'm exactly the same.
221
00:09:46,709 --> 00:09:48,166
I love my life.
222
00:09:48,250 --> 00:09:51,709
But every now and then
I can't help but think about...
223
00:09:52,834 --> 00:09:53,834
Lisa.
224
00:09:54,250 --> 00:09:57,667
Sometimes I climb up
into the kids' tree house
225
00:09:58,000 --> 00:09:59,625
with my walkman,
226
00:09:59,709 --> 00:10:03,709
light up a joint
and listen to Peter Frampton.
227
00:10:03,917 --> 00:10:05,875
[both giggle]
228
00:10:13,333 --> 00:10:15,333
[Carrie clears her throat]
229
00:10:18,917 --> 00:10:21,208
There's a woman in there
breastfeeding a child
230
00:10:21,291 --> 00:10:22,583
who can chew steak.
231
00:10:23,000 --> 00:10:24,709
You know how I feel about that?
232
00:10:24,792 --> 00:10:28,500
If you can ask for it, you're
probably too old to have it.
233
00:10:28,875 --> 00:10:30,750
[woman] Jeremy, no!
234
00:10:31,792 --> 00:10:33,291
I just realized,
235
00:10:33,375 --> 00:10:36,166
maybe it's maturity or the
wisdom that comes with age,
236
00:10:36,250 --> 00:10:39,208
but the witch
in Hansel and Gretel ,
237
00:10:39,291 --> 00:10:41,125
she's very misunderstood.
238
00:10:41,208 --> 00:10:43,792
I mean, the woman builds
her dream house
239
00:10:43,875 --> 00:10:47,667
and these brats come along
and start eating it.
240
00:10:50,792 --> 00:10:53,208
I just have to tell you
your home is beautiful.
241
00:10:53,291 --> 00:10:54,250
Thank you.
242
00:10:54,625 --> 00:10:56,458
[Laney] I know it's
a big change.
243
00:10:56,542 --> 00:10:59,875
But at some point you have to
get serious and settle down.
244
00:10:59,959 --> 00:11:02,417
I mean, life is not a
Jacqueline Susann novel.
245
00:11:02,500 --> 00:11:06,000
Four friends looking for
life and love in the big city.
246
00:11:06,083 --> 00:11:07,166
No.
247
00:11:08,709 --> 00:11:09,875
Stop it.
248
00:11:09,959 --> 00:11:12,166
You are not gonna clean
up at your own shower.
249
00:11:12,250 --> 00:11:15,750
Yeah, relax, 'cause once little
Todd or Shayla comes around,
250
00:11:15,834 --> 00:11:17,458
you'll never stop cleaning up.
251
00:11:17,542 --> 00:11:18,917
Shayla? Did you say Shayla?
252
00:11:19,000 --> 00:11:21,083
It's so unique, isn't it?
253
00:11:21,166 --> 00:11:22,458
It's so my name.
254
00:11:22,959 --> 00:11:24,959
I thought your name
was Charlotte.
255
00:11:25,041 --> 00:11:26,208
No, it's not my name.
256
00:11:26,291 --> 00:11:27,500
It's my name.
257
00:11:27,583 --> 00:11:29,667
My secret baby name
that I made up when I was
258
00:11:29,750 --> 00:11:32,208
eleven years old for my
daughter when I had her.
259
00:11:32,291 --> 00:11:33,333
I told you.
260
00:11:33,417 --> 00:11:35,166
Don't tell me you
don't remember.
261
00:11:35,250 --> 00:11:37,542
No, I'm sorry.
I-- I really don't.
262
00:11:37,625 --> 00:11:39,000
[Carrie] A complete lie.
263
00:11:39,083 --> 00:11:40,291
She remembered.
264
00:11:40,375 --> 00:11:41,625
We all remembered.
265
00:11:41,709 --> 00:11:44,333
Charlotte had made us all swear
never to use it.
266
00:11:44,417 --> 00:11:46,333
Anyway, I think my husband
heard it somewhere else.
267
00:11:46,417 --> 00:11:49,000
Really, where?
Because I didn't tell him.
268
00:11:49,083 --> 00:11:51,959
I can't believe you're
freaking out over a name.
269
00:11:52,041 --> 00:11:54,083
I mean,
you're not even pregnant.
270
00:11:54,166 --> 00:11:55,458
[Charlotte] That's not
the point!
271
00:11:55,542 --> 00:11:57,166
What's going on?
272
00:11:57,250 --> 00:11:59,125
She stole my baby name.
273
00:11:59,333 --> 00:12:01,250
-You bitch!
-[gasps]
274
00:12:01,709 --> 00:12:03,125
Let's go.
275
00:12:09,291 --> 00:12:12,208
[Carrie] Beers and bar nuts at
Flanagan's off route five
276
00:12:12,291 --> 00:12:15,959
were the perfect antidote to
Laney's house of humiliation.
277
00:12:16,041 --> 00:12:18,709
If I hadn't waited this long
to have a baby,
278
00:12:18,792 --> 00:12:20,291
that name would be mine.
279
00:12:20,375 --> 00:12:22,375
Oh, Charlotte, come on.
You're still young.
280
00:12:22,458 --> 00:12:24,709
You have plenty of
time to have children.
281
00:12:24,792 --> 00:12:26,125
No, no I don't.
282
00:12:26,208 --> 00:12:29,291
I don't want to be one of
those forty-year-old moms.
283
00:12:29,792 --> 00:12:31,083
No, no offense.
284
00:12:31,166 --> 00:12:33,417
Well, I don't want to be
one of them either.
285
00:12:33,500 --> 00:12:36,166
There are no frozen
eggs in my freezer.
286
00:12:36,959 --> 00:12:38,542
Was the bathroom clean?
287
00:12:38,625 --> 00:12:40,375
What do you think?
288
00:12:40,458 --> 00:12:43,583
This is why I hate baby showers.
289
00:12:43,667 --> 00:12:45,417
Always leave
feeling depressed.
290
00:12:45,500 --> 00:12:47,542
Patty, another round.
291
00:12:47,625 --> 00:12:50,917
Well, I for one love my life
and I will not be
292
00:12:51,000 --> 00:12:54,083
made to feel inadequate
by all this baby talk.
293
00:12:54,166 --> 00:12:56,667
I spoke to a woman
with a master's in finance.
294
00:12:56,750 --> 00:13:00,125
-All she wanted to talk
about was her Diaper Genie.
-[Samantha scoffs]
295
00:13:00,208 --> 00:13:02,166
Oh, come on, you guys,
it doesn't have to be like that.
296
00:13:02,250 --> 00:13:04,083
You don't have to lose
yourself to have a kid.
297
00:13:04,166 --> 00:13:08,667
I know plenty of cool,
hip mothers who live in the city
298
00:13:08,750 --> 00:13:11,875
and who still have
great careers and stuff.
299
00:13:11,959 --> 00:13:13,417
-Who?
-Who?
300
00:13:14,709 --> 00:13:16,458
I'm late.
I missed my period.
301
00:13:16,542 --> 00:13:19,333
Patty, honey,
where are those beers?
302
00:13:19,709 --> 00:13:20,834
How late?
303
00:13:20,917 --> 00:13:24,458
I don't know, just a few...
seven days.
304
00:13:24,542 --> 00:13:26,917
Oh, honey, gray area.
305
00:13:27,000 --> 00:13:29,125
True, you're in front
of the firing squad,
306
00:13:29,208 --> 00:13:31,500
but you haven't been shot.
307
00:13:31,583 --> 00:13:33,458
I was once ten days late.
308
00:13:33,542 --> 00:13:34,458
Really?
309
00:13:34,542 --> 00:13:36,166
Were you having sex?
310
00:13:36,959 --> 00:13:38,041
No.
311
00:13:39,375 --> 00:13:41,458
-What are you gonna do?
-[Carrie sighs]
312
00:13:41,542 --> 00:13:42,834
You gonna tell Mr. Big?
313
00:13:42,917 --> 00:13:45,792
No, I am not gonna tell him
until I know what I...
314
00:13:45,875 --> 00:13:48,709
Until I know how I...
What--
315
00:13:49,875 --> 00:13:53,625
No, I'm,
I am not going to tell him
316
00:13:53,709 --> 00:13:56,542
until I know how to
finish the sentence.
317
00:13:58,792 --> 00:13:59,834
What did I miss?
318
00:13:59,917 --> 00:14:01,417
[all three] Nothing.
319
00:14:03,625 --> 00:14:06,875
[Carrie] That night,
Charlotte got out her wish box
where she kept
320
00:14:06,959 --> 00:14:10,250
reminders of all the
things she hoped for in life.
321
00:14:10,959 --> 00:14:12,583
A gift for Shayla.
322
00:14:15,291 --> 00:14:17,166
A townhouse in the city.
323
00:14:17,250 --> 00:14:19,542
A beach house in East Hampton.
324
00:14:23,458 --> 00:14:24,709
Her dream man.
325
00:14:28,792 --> 00:14:30,417
Her back-up dream man.
326
00:14:32,625 --> 00:14:34,834
It's very strange
when the life you never had
327
00:14:34,917 --> 00:14:37,125
flashes before your eyes.
328
00:14:38,041 --> 00:14:40,417
Carrie held hostage, day eight.
329
00:14:40,500 --> 00:14:42,333
Miranda and I went shopping.
330
00:14:42,417 --> 00:14:44,709
I'm on total ovary overload.
331
00:14:44,792 --> 00:14:46,208
Which kind do I get?
332
00:14:46,291 --> 00:14:49,083
Here, this one's on sale.
Half off.
333
00:14:49,166 --> 00:14:51,375
Sweetie, I just spent three
hundred and ninety-five dollars
334
00:14:51,458 --> 00:14:53,417
on a pair of open
toed Gucci's last week.
335
00:14:53,500 --> 00:14:56,125
-This is not the
place to be frugal.
-All right.
336
00:14:56,208 --> 00:14:57,542
Well, what about this one?
337
00:14:57,625 --> 00:14:59,458
Oh, First Response.
I remember First Response.
338
00:14:59,542 --> 00:15:01,875
I had a very reassuring moment
once with First Response.
339
00:15:01,959 --> 00:15:03,250
Oh.
340
00:15:03,333 --> 00:15:05,625
[sighs] Here's hoping.
341
00:15:05,709 --> 00:15:09,041
[announcement over PA]
Cosmetics, pick up line two.
Line two, Cosmetics...
342
00:15:09,125 --> 00:15:10,166
What if I am?
343
00:15:11,083 --> 00:15:12,875
If you am, you am.
344
00:15:12,959 --> 00:15:15,917
I don't think I'd be
very good at this.
345
00:15:16,000 --> 00:15:18,542
I mean, am I maternal?
346
00:15:19,291 --> 00:15:21,709
-Um...
-You know, when I was
a little girl,
347
00:15:21,792 --> 00:15:24,500
I left my favorite baby doll
out in the rain for four days.
348
00:15:24,583 --> 00:15:25,750
Her face peeled off.
349
00:15:25,834 --> 00:15:26,709
That can't be good.
350
00:15:26,792 --> 00:15:28,083
Yeah, but, I mean,
if you--
351
00:15:28,166 --> 00:15:30,250
I shaved my Barbie's head
when I was mad at her.
352
00:15:30,333 --> 00:15:32,250
When I was little,
I took a rubber band
353
00:15:32,333 --> 00:15:34,333
and put it around
my dog Pepper's snout.
354
00:15:35,834 --> 00:15:37,458
-What?
-Oh, God.
355
00:15:41,291 --> 00:15:42,750
Can you picture it?
356
00:15:42,834 --> 00:15:43,750
Us with...
357
00:15:43,834 --> 00:15:45,166
Kids?
358
00:15:45,792 --> 00:15:46,917
Babies.
359
00:15:47,000 --> 00:15:49,417
[sighs] I'll probably
end up with five.
360
00:15:49,500 --> 00:15:52,125
[Carrie] Five hours
and two packs of gum later,
361
00:15:52,208 --> 00:15:54,166
I decided I couldn't
take the test
362
00:15:54,250 --> 00:15:57,041
till I knew exactly how
I felt about the results.
363
00:15:57,125 --> 00:15:58,125
Either way...
364
00:15:58,208 --> 00:16:01,041
[phone ringing]
365
00:16:04,417 --> 00:16:05,417
Hello.
366
00:16:05,500 --> 00:16:06,333
It's Laney.
367
00:16:06,417 --> 00:16:08,083
Oh, hi.
368
00:16:08,166 --> 00:16:10,542
I just wanted to tell you
it was so great to see
you guys the other day.
369
00:16:10,625 --> 00:16:11,959
I know I was a big bitch,
370
00:16:12,041 --> 00:16:14,750
but you gotta know my
hormones are going wild.
371
00:16:14,834 --> 00:16:16,709
The truth is Laney's
hormones have been
372
00:16:16,792 --> 00:16:18,500
going wild since
she was ten.
373
00:16:18,583 --> 00:16:22,458
And seeing you made me remember
how much fun we used to have.
374
00:16:22,542 --> 00:16:23,625
Yeah, we did.
375
00:16:23,709 --> 00:16:25,750
It's amazing how
much time has gone by.
376
00:16:25,834 --> 00:16:27,208
Tell me about it.
377
00:16:27,709 --> 00:16:28,792
But I miss us.
378
00:16:28,875 --> 00:16:29,875
I really do.
379
00:16:29,959 --> 00:16:31,959
We should
get together more often.
380
00:16:32,041 --> 00:16:33,333
Mm-hmm.
381
00:16:34,208 --> 00:16:36,542
But, I mean,
we should get together.
382
00:16:36,625 --> 00:16:39,625
Not just say we're going to,
but really do it.
383
00:16:39,709 --> 00:16:40,792
Absolutely.
384
00:16:40,875 --> 00:16:42,500
Listen, I've got to go.
I'm running late.
385
00:16:42,583 --> 00:16:43,834
Where you off to?
386
00:16:43,917 --> 00:16:45,917
Um, actually Samantha's
having one of her parties.
387
00:16:46,000 --> 00:16:47,792
-She is?
-Yeah.
388
00:16:47,875 --> 00:16:49,125
Oh, man.
389
00:16:49,333 --> 00:16:51,834
See, that's the kind of thing--
I love Samantha's parties.
390
00:16:51,917 --> 00:16:53,041
Why didn't you tell me?
391
00:16:53,125 --> 00:16:55,333
Next time, I promise,
all right?
392
00:16:55,417 --> 00:16:57,041
Okay, bye.
393
00:16:59,375 --> 00:17:01,208
[Carrie] Faced with
her own inadequacy,
394
00:17:01,291 --> 00:17:03,875
Samantha did something
only Samantha could do.
395
00:17:03,959 --> 00:17:06,166
She threw an "I don't
have a baby" shower
396
00:17:06,250 --> 00:17:08,333
to let everyone know
she was fabulous.
397
00:17:08,417 --> 00:17:10,458
Great to see you.
398
00:17:10,542 --> 00:17:12,500
Oh, I don't have a baby!
399
00:17:12,583 --> 00:17:14,208
Everybody drink!
400
00:17:14,291 --> 00:17:15,500
[laughs]
401
00:17:15,583 --> 00:17:16,792
Are you having fun?
402
00:17:16,875 --> 00:17:19,750
Yes, I am, but not quite
as much fun as Miranda.
403
00:17:19,834 --> 00:17:22,875
[Carrie] Still convinced that
marriage plus baby equals death,
404
00:17:23,000 --> 00:17:24,417
Miranda chose life.
405
00:17:24,500 --> 00:17:27,375
Also known as Ed,
Samantha's accountant.
406
00:17:27,458 --> 00:17:30,250
If she fucks on that couch,
she buys it.
407
00:17:31,083 --> 00:17:32,709
[screaming]
408
00:17:32,792 --> 00:17:35,125
[unexcitedly] Ah...
409
00:17:37,041 --> 00:17:38,166
Hey, you guys.
410
00:17:38,250 --> 00:17:40,458
The entertainment has arrived.
411
00:17:42,625 --> 00:17:43,875
What are you doing here?
412
00:17:43,959 --> 00:17:44,959
What I do best.
413
00:17:45,041 --> 00:17:46,333
Partying!
414
00:17:46,417 --> 00:17:48,041
Here, maybe we better
sit down.
415
00:17:48,125 --> 00:17:49,542
Fuck no.
Where's the bar?
416
00:17:49,625 --> 00:17:50,959
Somebody get me a drink!
417
00:17:51,041 --> 00:17:52,917
No, I don't know, Laney.
You think that's a good idea?
418
00:17:53,000 --> 00:17:54,375
Fuck yeah, I'm due any day.
419
00:17:54,458 --> 00:17:56,458
What's one little drink
gonna matter?
420
00:17:56,542 --> 00:17:59,250
Maybe it will help
me go into labor. [laughs]
421
00:18:00,000 --> 00:18:03,333
She gives birth on that couch,
she buys it.
422
00:18:03,417 --> 00:18:04,750
What are you doing here?
423
00:18:04,834 --> 00:18:06,083
What is she doing here?
424
00:18:06,166 --> 00:18:07,959
-I missed you guys.
-[Charlotte] Oh, us, us?
425
00:18:08,041 --> 00:18:09,583
The pathetic,
live for the moment,
426
00:18:09,667 --> 00:18:11,458
New York single girls
who think that life
427
00:18:11,542 --> 00:18:12,959
is a Jacqueline Susann
novel?
428
00:18:13,041 --> 00:18:15,542
Look, I'm sure you get
asked this all the time, but...
429
00:18:15,625 --> 00:18:16,750
what is your problem?
430
00:18:16,834 --> 00:18:18,166
My problem?
431
00:18:18,250 --> 00:18:21,250
Just that I had a dream
and you killed it in a nutshell.
432
00:18:21,333 --> 00:18:22,959
Really?
Well, then you're lucky.
433
00:18:23,041 --> 00:18:25,208
Because at least you know
what happened to your dream.
434
00:18:25,291 --> 00:18:27,458
I have absolutely no
idea what happened to mine.
435
00:18:27,542 --> 00:18:29,375
-[man] Hi, Laney!
-[giggles]
436
00:18:29,458 --> 00:18:32,542
[Carrie] I spent the next hour
keeping Charlotte
away from Laney
437
00:18:32,625 --> 00:18:34,417
and Laney away
from the vodka.
438
00:18:34,500 --> 00:18:36,417
Well, well, well,
look who came up for air.
439
00:18:36,500 --> 00:18:39,834
He's a good kisser and he's
gonna do my taxes for free.
440
00:18:39,917 --> 00:18:41,291
Excuse me. Sorry.
441
00:18:41,375 --> 00:18:42,333
Hey, Carrie.
442
00:18:42,417 --> 00:18:43,834
Hey, Jonathan.
443
00:18:43,917 --> 00:18:45,750
Listen, I've just been talking
to your friend, Charlotte.
444
00:18:45,834 --> 00:18:48,875
She's really great.
Is, um, she seeing anybody?
445
00:18:48,959 --> 00:18:49,959
Wide open.
446
00:18:50,041 --> 00:18:52,333
Just don't mention
the name "Shayla."
447
00:18:52,417 --> 00:18:53,542
Sorry?
448
00:18:53,625 --> 00:18:54,834
Nothing.
It's a private joke.
449
00:18:54,917 --> 00:18:57,125
Go forth... and date.
450
00:18:57,208 --> 00:18:59,250
[Carrie] His name
was Jonathan Bicks.
451
00:18:59,333 --> 00:19:01,125
He was a trader
at Bear Stearns
452
00:19:01,208 --> 00:19:05,250
and had just closed escrow
on a house in the Hamptons.
453
00:19:05,333 --> 00:19:08,583
Charlotte suddenly
realized all was not lost.
454
00:19:08,667 --> 00:19:10,166
As she sipped her beer,
455
00:19:10,250 --> 00:19:12,291
she mentally scotch-taped
her dream house
456
00:19:12,375 --> 00:19:13,709
back together again.
457
00:19:15,834 --> 00:19:18,125
[sighs] This party sucks.
458
00:19:18,208 --> 00:19:21,458
Laney, maybe we should
think about getting you home,
all right?
459
00:19:21,542 --> 00:19:24,041
No, I don't want to go
back there.
460
00:19:26,750 --> 00:19:29,959
Hey, you fuckers!
Who wants to see my tits?
461
00:19:31,375 --> 00:19:32,709
I'll take a look.
462
00:19:32,792 --> 00:19:35,000
Laney, Laney,
come on, come back.
Don't do this.
463
00:19:35,083 --> 00:19:37,125
Relax.
This is gonna be fun.
464
00:19:37,208 --> 00:19:40,000
All right, look.
Now we're gonna have a party.
[laughs]
465
00:19:40,083 --> 00:19:42,917
All right.
Pregnant lady showing her tits!
466
00:19:43,000 --> 00:19:44,250
Whoo!
467
00:19:46,375 --> 00:19:47,709
Oh, my God.
468
00:19:47,792 --> 00:19:49,834
This is at once so sad
469
00:19:49,917 --> 00:19:54,125
and the most fabulous validation
I've ever gotten in my life.
470
00:20:04,125 --> 00:20:05,709
This is weird.
471
00:20:07,125 --> 00:20:08,750
I-- I don't-- I...
472
00:20:09,583 --> 00:20:11,625
I don't think I can do this.
473
00:20:12,792 --> 00:20:14,166
No biggie.
474
00:20:17,291 --> 00:20:20,041
[Carrie] Despite her best
efforts to run free,
475
00:20:20,125 --> 00:20:23,333
it appeared that Laney Berlin's
invisible electric fence
476
00:20:23,417 --> 00:20:25,750
stretched all the
way to Manhattan.
477
00:20:27,375 --> 00:20:28,959
No, no, I know I can do it.
478
00:20:29,041 --> 00:20:30,583
Just-- just give me
one more chance.
479
00:20:30,667 --> 00:20:33,208
Laney, Laney,
it's not who you are anymore.
480
00:20:33,291 --> 00:20:34,792
It's all right.
481
00:20:35,458 --> 00:20:37,875
But I didn't know
that was gonna happen.
482
00:20:37,959 --> 00:20:40,125
No-- nobody told me
that was gonna happen.
483
00:20:40,208 --> 00:20:43,291
I mean,
somebody should warn you.
484
00:20:44,375 --> 00:20:46,000
All right.
485
00:20:47,417 --> 00:20:49,041
One day you're gonna wake up
486
00:20:49,125 --> 00:20:51,834
and you're not gonna
recognize yourself.
487
00:20:59,834 --> 00:21:02,166
Can you take her to Connecticut?
488
00:21:11,375 --> 00:21:14,792
[Carrie] I spent the entire
next day sitting on a park bench
489
00:21:14,875 --> 00:21:16,959
watching children play.
490
00:21:19,542 --> 00:21:22,375
If I had to, could I do this?
491
00:21:24,542 --> 00:21:26,375
Would I be any good?
492
00:21:27,834 --> 00:21:30,667
Would I somehow
manage to stay me?
493
00:21:38,917 --> 00:21:40,709
[Carrie laughs] Hello.
494
00:21:40,792 --> 00:21:43,875
Oh, my.
[laughs]
495
00:21:43,959 --> 00:21:45,709
Oh, sorry.
496
00:21:46,208 --> 00:21:47,542
That's okay.
497
00:21:47,625 --> 00:21:48,792
She's adorable.
498
00:21:48,875 --> 00:21:50,458
Yeah, most of the time.
499
00:21:50,542 --> 00:21:51,959
-[mom] You want to go home?
-[girl] Yeah.
500
00:21:52,041 --> 00:21:53,333
Yeah, yeah.
501
00:21:53,417 --> 00:21:55,417
-Bye.
-[Carrie] Bye-bye.
502
00:21:56,417 --> 00:21:57,875
Bye.
503
00:22:01,166 --> 00:22:05,000
[Carrie] On the way home,
I got my period.