1
00:00:48,007 --> 00:00:51,007
[Carrie]
My friend, Miranda, was dating
Thomas John Anderson,
2
00:00:51,010 --> 00:00:53,020
an up and coming
New York playwright.
3
00:00:53,019 --> 00:00:58,019
Oh, God!
4
00:00:59,000 --> 00:01:02,020
[breathing heavily]
That was wonderful.
5
00:01:02,019 --> 00:01:05,019
[Carrie] Things were going great
except for one thing.
6
00:01:05,020 --> 00:01:07,010
I'll be right back.
7
00:01:09,008 --> 00:01:10,998
[Carrie]
Immediately after sex,
8
00:01:11,004 --> 00:01:13,024
he'd hop out of bed
and shower.
9
00:01:14,001 --> 00:01:15,021
[shower running]
10
00:01:16,012 --> 00:01:22,022
Oh, God!
11
00:01:25,000 --> 00:01:25,020
Wow!
12
00:01:26,016 --> 00:01:27,016
Be right back.
13
00:01:27,018 --> 00:01:29,998
[Carrie] Night after night,
it was the same thing.
14
00:01:30,003 --> 00:01:34,013
Oh, God!
15
00:01:37,003 --> 00:01:39,003
-I'll be right--
-Yeah.
16
00:01:39,002 --> 00:01:41,012
[Carrie] She decided to confront
Thomas John Anderson
17
00:01:41,015 --> 00:01:43,005
as soon
as he dried off.
18
00:01:47,005 --> 00:01:50,005
So, what's
with the showers?
19
00:01:51,006 --> 00:01:52,006
What do you mean?
20
00:01:52,014 --> 00:01:55,004
You always get up and shower
right after we're done.
21
00:01:55,006 --> 00:01:57,006
I'm starting to
feel like it's me.
22
00:01:57,009 --> 00:02:00,009
Oh, no, no, no,
it's not you.
23
00:02:00,009 --> 00:02:01,019
It's just...
24
00:02:01,021 --> 00:02:02,021
What?
25
00:02:03,001 --> 00:02:04,011
Just a habit I have.
26
00:02:04,010 --> 00:02:08,000
Growing up, the nuns told us
that sex was a sin,
27
00:02:08,003 --> 00:02:12,013
so I just got into the habit
of taking a shower after I...
28
00:02:12,016 --> 00:02:13,016
you know, came.
29
00:02:13,020 --> 00:02:15,010
Oh, the nuns.
30
00:02:15,008 --> 00:02:19,008
[Carrie]
Miranda suddenly realized
she was dating "Catholic guy."
31
00:02:19,014 --> 00:02:21,014
So you think
the water serves as
32
00:02:21,011 --> 00:02:23,021
a retro baptism
kind of thing?
33
00:02:23,020 --> 00:02:25,010
Beats me, if I'd known
he was Catholic,
34
00:02:25,015 --> 00:02:27,005
I never would've gone out
with him in the first place.
35
00:02:27,016 --> 00:02:29,006
They should make them
wear a sign.
36
00:02:29,008 --> 00:02:30,018
[Carrie]
Single people in New York
37
00:02:30,018 --> 00:02:32,998
rarely ask about their dates'
religious backgrounds
38
00:02:33,003 --> 00:02:34,023
for the same reason
they don't ask
39
00:02:34,020 --> 00:02:37,010
the number of former
sex partners, too scary.
40
00:02:37,008 --> 00:02:39,998
I mean, he's a rational,
logical guy
41
00:02:40,002 --> 00:02:42,012
in every respect
but this.
42
00:02:42,008 --> 00:02:44,008
Clean, you forgot clean.
He's a clean guy.
43
00:02:44,014 --> 00:02:46,024
Leave it to me to find
the only religious guy
44
00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:48,010
still left in Manhattan.
45
00:02:48,016 --> 00:02:51,006
[Carrie] New York is a city
filled with places to worship,
46
00:02:51,008 --> 00:02:52,018
but it recently
dawned on me,
47
00:02:53,001 --> 00:02:56,011
the only time I ever heard
anyone mention going into one
48
00:02:56,007 --> 00:02:58,007
was for
a singles mixer.
49
00:02:58,016 --> 00:03:02,006
Are relationships
the religion of the 90's?
50
00:03:02,008 --> 00:03:04,998
Having been raised
in the church of
"Be nice to people
51
00:03:05,004 --> 00:03:07,004
and don't talk
with your mouth full,"
52
00:03:07,005 --> 00:03:09,995
I decided to check out some more
traditional religious types
53
00:03:10,005 --> 00:03:11,015
in their natural habitat.
54
00:03:11,017 --> 00:03:13,007
As I watched people
leaving church,
55
00:03:13,011 --> 00:03:15,011
I was amazed
at how they looked.
56
00:03:15,010 --> 00:03:17,000
Valentino, Escada,
57
00:03:17,005 --> 00:03:18,015
Oscar de la Renta.
58
00:03:18,020 --> 00:03:20,020
What is it about
God and fashion
59
00:03:20,019 --> 00:03:22,019
that go
so well together?
60
00:03:22,018 --> 00:03:26,018
And suddenly, there he was
wearing Armani on Sunday...
61
00:03:27,008 --> 00:03:29,008
Mr. Big.
62
00:03:29,013 --> 00:03:31,013
I admit it was
kind of a shock.
63
00:03:31,009 --> 00:03:34,999
Up until that moment,
I thought he only
believed in the Yankees.
64
00:03:41,017 --> 00:03:43,017
Well, hello there,
church-goer.
65
00:03:43,019 --> 00:03:45,009
Hey...
66
00:03:45,012 --> 00:03:47,022
What are you
doing here?
67
00:03:47,017 --> 00:03:48,997
Research.
68
00:03:49,002 --> 00:03:51,012
I'm doing a column
on closet Presbyterians.
69
00:03:51,016 --> 00:03:52,006
You know any?
70
00:03:52,016 --> 00:03:53,996
Actually,
I'm an atheist,
71
00:03:54,003 --> 00:03:56,013
but don't tell that
to the minister.
72
00:03:56,012 --> 00:03:58,012
Who's the
mystery woman?
73
00:03:59,022 --> 00:04:00,022
My mother.
74
00:04:02,000 --> 00:04:04,010
I take her to church
every Sunday.
75
00:04:04,010 --> 00:04:06,010
Really?
76
00:04:06,011 --> 00:04:07,021
I'm so loving that.
77
00:04:08,000 --> 00:04:10,000
How come
you never told me?
78
00:04:10,003 --> 00:04:12,023
Well, you write
every Sunday, so...
79
00:04:12,021 --> 00:04:16,011
So, every Sunday... church.
80
00:04:16,010 --> 00:04:17,020
Right.
81
00:04:20,000 --> 00:04:21,020
[both laughing]
82
00:04:21,021 --> 00:04:23,021
You know, I've got 20 minutes
before my racquetball game.
83
00:04:23,023 --> 00:04:25,023
Why don't we have
a cup of coffee?
84
00:04:25,017 --> 00:04:26,017
Oh, I can't,
I'm on deadline
85
00:04:27,001 --> 00:04:30,001
and this cappuccino
just kicked in, so...
86
00:04:30,020 --> 00:04:32,000
So?
87
00:04:32,005 --> 00:04:33,005
Bye.
88
00:04:36,016 --> 00:04:37,016
God bless.
89
00:04:38,001 --> 00:04:40,011
It was one of those awkward
relationship moments
90
00:04:40,008 --> 00:04:42,008
where you feel like
you know nothing about
91
00:04:42,010 --> 00:04:45,010
the person you thought
you knew everything about.
92
00:04:45,013 --> 00:04:47,003
He goes to church
with his mother?
93
00:04:47,005 --> 00:04:49,005
-That can't be good.
-Oh, don't listen to her.
94
00:04:49,013 --> 00:04:52,013
A man who cares about his mother
makes a wonderful husband.
95
00:04:52,014 --> 00:04:53,024
I think
it's sweet.
96
00:04:53,021 --> 00:04:55,001
Sure, all religions
are sweet
97
00:04:55,004 --> 00:04:57,014
until you get to that
shower after sex phase.
98
00:04:57,007 --> 00:04:58,017
Oh, my God,
is he still doing that?
99
00:04:58,023 --> 00:05:00,023
Please, it's amazing
he has any skin left.
100
00:05:00,018 --> 00:05:02,018
Well, have you tried
taking a shower with him?
101
00:05:02,019 --> 00:05:05,019
No, I'm afraid he'll
pull out garlic and a cross.
102
00:05:05,019 --> 00:05:08,009
So which church does
his mother go to?
103
00:05:08,016 --> 00:05:09,016
Park Avenue Presbyterian.
104
00:05:09,023 --> 00:05:10,023
Good church.
105
00:05:11,000 --> 00:05:12,020
It's one of the best
on the east side.
106
00:05:12,019 --> 00:05:13,019
What are you
rating churches?
107
00:05:14,001 --> 00:05:15,011
Is there a Zagat guide
for that?
108
00:05:15,010 --> 00:05:16,020
Four stars,
great bread,
109
00:05:16,018 --> 00:05:18,008
disappointing wine selection.
110
00:05:18,007 --> 00:05:21,017
The thing is, I'm dying
to meet his mother.
111
00:05:21,018 --> 00:05:22,018
Can you imagine?
112
00:05:22,022 --> 00:05:24,022
Getting on the good side
of his mother
113
00:05:25,000 --> 00:05:26,010
is like
closing the deal.
114
00:05:26,016 --> 00:05:27,016
Hey, I'm sorry
I'm late.
115
00:05:27,023 --> 00:05:29,013
[Carrie] Well,
it's about time.
116
00:05:29,010 --> 00:05:31,010
I just had a five hour lunch
with James.
117
00:05:31,014 --> 00:05:33,014
Five hour lunches,
I remember those.
118
00:05:33,015 --> 00:05:36,005
Ladies, I have
an announcement.
119
00:05:36,007 --> 00:05:37,997
Please don't laugh.
120
00:05:38,002 --> 00:05:39,002
What?
121
00:05:39,021 --> 00:05:41,021
-I'm in love.
-What?
122
00:05:41,021 --> 00:05:44,011
[Carrie] Samantha uttering
those words to us
123
00:05:44,012 --> 00:05:46,022
was an event
as unfathomable
124
00:05:46,021 --> 00:05:50,011
as Moses
parting the Red Sea.
125
00:05:50,010 --> 00:05:52,020
It all started
a couple of weeks ago
126
00:05:52,020 --> 00:05:54,020
on a particularly
blah Wednesday night.
127
00:05:55,001 --> 00:05:56,021
Samantha decided
to treat herself
128
00:05:56,023 --> 00:05:58,023
to a night
of great music.
129
00:06:02,006 --> 00:06:05,006
I couldn't help but notice
how you move to the music.
130
00:06:05,015 --> 00:06:07,005
It's beautiful.
131
00:06:07,014 --> 00:06:09,014
Well, I love jazz.
132
00:06:09,015 --> 00:06:11,005
That's pretty clear.
133
00:06:11,016 --> 00:06:13,996
Are you
a musician?
134
00:06:14,019 --> 00:06:16,019
Yeah.
135
00:06:16,017 --> 00:06:18,017
Trapped in the body
of a lawyer.
136
00:06:18,019 --> 00:06:21,009
Well,
we won't tell anyone.
137
00:06:22,017 --> 00:06:24,007
May I join you?
138
00:06:25,012 --> 00:06:26,022
Sure.
139
00:06:31,019 --> 00:06:33,019
[Carrie] After they closed
the jazz joint,
140
00:06:33,018 --> 00:06:35,008
they walked
and talked for blocks.
141
00:06:35,012 --> 00:06:37,022
You have to at least
try one of the glazed.
142
00:06:38,001 --> 00:06:39,021
It's a little
bit of heaven.
143
00:06:41,000 --> 00:06:43,000
Mmm, heavenly.
144
00:06:43,004 --> 00:06:45,014
And I never thought
I'd get there.
145
00:06:45,013 --> 00:06:47,013
Why not?
146
00:06:47,013 --> 00:06:49,003
An angel like you?
147
00:06:50,009 --> 00:06:52,009
[Carrie] And then Samantha
did something
148
00:06:52,008 --> 00:06:54,008
rather shocking
for a first date.
149
00:06:54,012 --> 00:06:56,012
She didn't
ask him home.
150
00:06:57,004 --> 00:06:58,024
Thanks, James.
151
00:06:58,020 --> 00:07:02,010
I had
a wonderful time.
152
00:07:02,013 --> 00:07:04,013
Can I see you again?
153
00:07:05,018 --> 00:07:06,998
I'd love that.
154
00:07:09,020 --> 00:07:11,010
[Carrie]
And with that one touch,
155
00:07:11,016 --> 00:07:14,996
Samantha, who was never
a believer in relationships,
156
00:07:15,002 --> 00:07:17,002
suddenly became
a convert.
157
00:07:17,004 --> 00:07:18,024
I mean, I'd totally given up
on the idea
158
00:07:18,021 --> 00:07:20,021
that you could
actually talk to men.
159
00:07:20,021 --> 00:07:22,011
Hey, don't
spread that around.
160
00:07:22,008 --> 00:07:23,998
Before James,
all my conversations
161
00:07:24,006 --> 00:07:25,996
consisted of two sentences.
162
00:07:26,002 --> 00:07:29,002
"Give it to me"
and "Go home."
163
00:07:29,005 --> 00:07:30,995
And I owe it
all to Charlotte.
164
00:07:31,005 --> 00:07:32,005
Me?
165
00:07:32,013 --> 00:07:34,003
What did I do?
166
00:07:34,005 --> 00:07:35,015
All that bullshit
you spout
167
00:07:35,021 --> 00:07:38,021
about not sleeping with men
right away actually paid off.
168
00:07:39,000 --> 00:07:41,000
I mean, if I'd fucked
James already,
169
00:07:41,006 --> 00:07:42,016
who knows
where we'd be.
170
00:07:42,017 --> 00:07:44,017
Wait, you haven't
had sex yet?
171
00:07:44,021 --> 00:07:45,021
Soon.
172
00:07:46,023 --> 00:07:48,003
You know,
173
00:07:48,004 --> 00:07:51,014
I think he's someone
I could actually marry.
174
00:07:52,019 --> 00:07:55,009
Samantha,
that's great.
175
00:07:55,007 --> 00:07:56,017
[Carrie]
The idea that Samantha
176
00:07:56,019 --> 00:07:58,019
could possibly get married
before she did,
177
00:07:58,022 --> 00:08:01,012
shook Charlotte's
beliefs to the core.
178
00:08:01,008 --> 00:08:03,008
She took some
drastic action.
179
00:08:03,010 --> 00:08:05,020
She made an appointment
to see Noanie Stein,
180
00:08:05,019 --> 00:08:07,999
psychic to the stars,
and a cosmic connection
181
00:08:08,006 --> 00:08:09,006
who lived
in a brownstone
182
00:08:09,015 --> 00:08:11,015
between Central Park West
and Columbus.
183
00:08:11,020 --> 00:08:13,010
Is this you
and Madonna?
184
00:08:13,015 --> 00:08:16,015
Yeah, we go to
the same kabbalah class.
185
00:08:18,006 --> 00:08:19,006
Now...
186
00:08:20,005 --> 00:08:21,015
Pick three cards,
187
00:08:22,001 --> 00:08:24,021
face down
with your left hand.
188
00:08:24,023 --> 00:08:27,023
[Carrie]
Charlotte had heard about Noanie
through a sorority sister
189
00:08:27,020 --> 00:08:31,000
whose marriage she had
very accurately predicted.
190
00:08:31,004 --> 00:08:32,014
Okay,
191
00:08:32,008 --> 00:08:35,018
now is there one
question in particular?
192
00:08:36,001 --> 00:08:40,011
Well, no, just...
193
00:08:40,012 --> 00:08:41,022
There is.
194
00:08:42,020 --> 00:08:44,020
When will
I get married?
195
00:08:47,010 --> 00:08:50,010
Ace of wands,
prosperity.
196
00:08:52,001 --> 00:08:53,011
Nine of cups,
197
00:08:53,011 --> 00:08:55,021
strength
and independence.
198
00:08:57,015 --> 00:09:00,015
The hanged man,
a new awakening.
199
00:09:00,019 --> 00:09:03,019
You're a strong
independent woman
200
00:09:03,018 --> 00:09:05,008
with great success
in your future,
201
00:09:05,013 --> 00:09:07,013
but I do not
see marriage.
202
00:09:09,001 --> 00:09:10,011
Excuse me?
203
00:09:10,011 --> 00:09:11,021
I don't see it.
204
00:09:12,018 --> 00:09:13,018
What?
205
00:09:13,020 --> 00:09:15,020
I don't
see marriage.
206
00:09:15,019 --> 00:09:18,009
Well,
how can you just...
207
00:09:18,007 --> 00:09:20,007
say that
like that?
208
00:09:20,013 --> 00:09:24,003
I mean, what about
my feelings?
209
00:09:24,006 --> 00:09:27,016
Honey, I'm a psychic,
I'm not a shrink.
210
00:09:27,018 --> 00:09:30,008
So, who is this fabulous
mother in the hat,
211
00:09:30,008 --> 00:09:33,008
and when do I get to go
to church with you two?
212
00:09:33,010 --> 00:09:35,020
You want to
go to church?
213
00:09:36,000 --> 00:09:38,020
You say that like
I'm the Antichrist or something.
214
00:09:38,022 --> 00:09:41,012
No, it's just I never thought
of you
215
00:09:41,014 --> 00:09:43,014
as the church type.
216
00:09:43,008 --> 00:09:44,018
Oh, really?
217
00:09:44,022 --> 00:09:46,012
What type am I?
218
00:09:46,009 --> 00:09:50,009
The incredibly beautiful
and intelligent type.
219
00:09:51,019 --> 00:09:53,009
What religion
are you?
220
00:09:53,013 --> 00:09:55,023
I'm no one religion
in particular.
221
00:09:55,020 --> 00:09:56,020
I'm open to all.
222
00:09:56,023 --> 00:09:58,013
Oh, kind of like
a 7-11?
223
00:09:58,015 --> 00:09:59,015
Come on,
224
00:10:00,001 --> 00:10:02,021
I want to go to church
with you and your mommy.
225
00:10:02,020 --> 00:10:04,010
How about
this Sunday?
226
00:10:04,010 --> 00:10:07,020
Well, it's just
a private little thing
227
00:10:08,001 --> 00:10:10,011
my mother and I do,
just the two of us.
228
00:10:18,020 --> 00:10:20,020
Want to go to
the Caribbean next week?
229
00:10:21,001 --> 00:10:23,001
Sure, I'll go
pack my Jet Ski.
230
00:10:23,005 --> 00:10:24,005
No, I'm serious.
231
00:10:24,009 --> 00:10:26,009
We can both
use a vacation, come on.
232
00:10:26,014 --> 00:10:29,004
The sun, the sand,
you and me.
233
00:10:29,005 --> 00:10:31,005
You waiting on me.
Can you get away?
234
00:10:31,008 --> 00:10:32,998
Yeah, but I can't
afford it.
235
00:10:33,002 --> 00:10:34,012
Well,
I'll tell you what.
236
00:10:34,015 --> 00:10:36,005
I'll buy the tickets,
when we get to St. Barts,
237
00:10:36,016 --> 00:10:39,016
you can buy me
one big margarita.
238
00:10:42,001 --> 00:10:47,021
Oh, God!
239
00:10:54,010 --> 00:10:56,020
Wait, I want
to hold you.
240
00:10:57,010 --> 00:10:58,020
I'll be right back.
241
00:10:58,021 --> 00:11:00,001
Stay here a second.
242
00:11:02,005 --> 00:11:05,015
Isn't this nice?
Us together?
243
00:11:06,000 --> 00:11:08,000
Yeah.
244
00:11:08,004 --> 00:11:09,024
Look, I'm just gonna go
jump in the shower
245
00:11:10,001 --> 00:11:12,021
and then boom,
I'm all yours.
246
00:11:12,022 --> 00:11:15,012
There's nothing
sinful about sex.
247
00:11:17,000 --> 00:11:20,000
Oh, oh, really?
248
00:11:20,002 --> 00:11:22,022
Well, thanks
for clearing that up.
249
00:11:22,021 --> 00:11:25,021
And what is that?
The gospel according to Miranda?
250
00:11:25,022 --> 00:11:28,012
What are you gonna tell me next,
that God made the body?
251
00:11:28,012 --> 00:11:29,022
And if God
made the body
252
00:11:29,020 --> 00:11:31,010
and sex is an expression
of that body,
253
00:11:31,011 --> 00:11:33,021
how can anything made by
that God-made body
254
00:11:33,023 --> 00:11:35,013
be considered sin?
255
00:11:35,011 --> 00:11:37,011
Well, yeah.
256
00:11:37,008 --> 00:11:40,008
Oh, it's a miracle,
I'm healed!
257
00:11:40,013 --> 00:11:42,023
You're free to go work
with the lepers now.
258
00:11:42,017 --> 00:11:44,007
I guess this means
I'm not going to hell.
259
00:11:44,016 --> 00:11:45,996
Great news!
260
00:11:46,006 --> 00:11:47,016
Thank you, Miranda.
261
00:11:47,019 --> 00:11:50,009
Thank you for
saving my immortal soul.
262
00:11:50,012 --> 00:11:52,012
[Carrie]
In her effort to help,
263
00:11:52,009 --> 00:11:54,999
Miranda had accidentally
detonated some kind of
264
00:11:55,004 --> 00:11:56,024
Catholic guilt bomb.
265
00:11:57,022 --> 00:11:59,022
I'm gonna
go take a shower.
266
00:12:00,001 --> 00:12:01,001
When I come out,
267
00:12:01,005 --> 00:12:02,995
I'd kind of like it
if you weren't here.
268
00:12:04,001 --> 00:12:05,001
You got it.
269
00:12:05,005 --> 00:12:07,015
[Carrie] Six months later,
that exact same speech
270
00:12:07,018 --> 00:12:10,008
would find its way into
Thomas John Anderson's
271
00:12:10,008 --> 00:12:13,008
hit off-Broadway play,
Shower of Shame.
272
00:12:15,016 --> 00:12:17,006
Meanwhile, downtown,
273
00:12:17,013 --> 00:12:20,023
Samantha was
preparing to see God.
274
00:12:22,021 --> 00:12:25,021
I know it's only been
a couple of weeks,
275
00:12:25,023 --> 00:12:27,023
but I love you,
Samantha.
276
00:12:27,020 --> 00:12:29,020
Oh, I love you too.
277
00:12:37,006 --> 00:12:39,996
Oh, honey,
I can't wait any longer.
278
00:12:40,006 --> 00:12:42,996
Just unzip
and get over here.
279
00:12:55,012 --> 00:12:57,022
Okay,
I'm ready.
280
00:12:57,019 --> 00:12:59,009
Put it in.
281
00:12:59,016 --> 00:13:02,006
It is in.
282
00:13:02,007 --> 00:13:05,007
[Carrie] Samantha said a little
prayer that he was kidding.
283
00:13:06,006 --> 00:13:07,016
He wasn't.
284
00:13:09,017 --> 00:13:10,997
Sunday morning,
285
00:13:11,002 --> 00:13:14,012
a time for rest,
a time for relaxation,
286
00:13:14,014 --> 00:13:16,024
a time for spying.
287
00:13:16,021 --> 00:13:19,011
The plan was simple,
just get a look at the mother,
288
00:13:19,015 --> 00:13:21,005
then Miranda and I
would go for eggs.
289
00:13:21,015 --> 00:13:23,005
Look at how
crowded it is.
290
00:13:23,015 --> 00:13:24,005
What a sham.
291
00:13:24,016 --> 00:13:25,016
Will you
lighten up?
292
00:13:25,017 --> 00:13:27,007
It's a Presbyterian church,
not a Catholic one.
293
00:13:27,016 --> 00:13:29,016
Whatever, Catholics,
Episcopalians,
294
00:13:29,023 --> 00:13:31,013
Buddhists,
Shakers, Quakers,
295
00:13:31,016 --> 00:13:34,006
all the same, all designed
to fuck up our sex lives.
296
00:13:34,016 --> 00:13:35,016
Here, pray.
297
00:13:37,005 --> 00:13:38,005
Oh, there they are.
298
00:13:38,012 --> 00:13:40,002
-Where?
-Right there.
299
00:13:40,006 --> 00:13:44,006
[Carrie] As I watched
Mr. Big standing
quietly next to his mother,
300
00:13:44,011 --> 00:13:47,011
tall, proud,
respectful,
301
00:13:47,014 --> 00:13:50,014
I think I fell a little bit
more in love with him.
302
00:13:50,013 --> 00:13:52,023
Let us pray.
303
00:13:52,020 --> 00:13:54,020
We come together this day...
304
00:13:54,019 --> 00:13:55,019
We're out of here.
305
00:13:56,000 --> 00:13:57,010
...to receive your blessings...
306
00:13:57,016 --> 00:13:58,006
[screams]
307
00:13:58,015 --> 00:13:59,015
...Lord and Savior...
308
00:14:03,008 --> 00:14:06,008
[people chattering]
309
00:14:08,017 --> 00:14:09,997
Here they come.
310
00:14:10,004 --> 00:14:11,014
I say we make
a break for it.
311
00:14:11,013 --> 00:14:13,013
No, no, they saw me,
I have to say hello.
312
00:14:13,008 --> 00:14:15,008
I can't just
pray and run.
313
00:14:15,012 --> 00:14:17,012
Oh, there they are.
314
00:14:17,011 --> 00:14:19,001
Okay, go, I'm fine.
315
00:14:19,003 --> 00:14:20,013
Go.
316
00:14:23,014 --> 00:14:26,014
Aren't you the young lady
who made all that noise?
317
00:14:26,011 --> 00:14:28,011
Slippery gloves.
318
00:14:28,016 --> 00:14:29,006
Morning.
319
00:14:29,015 --> 00:14:31,015
-Good morning.
-It's a lovely church.
320
00:14:31,017 --> 00:14:33,007
Yes, isn't it?
321
00:14:33,011 --> 00:14:34,021
Don't you think
it's lovely?
322
00:14:34,021 --> 00:14:37,021
Mother, this is
my friend, Carrie.
323
00:14:37,017 --> 00:14:38,997
[Carrie]
I searched her face,
324
00:14:39,005 --> 00:14:41,005
looking for the light
of recognition.
325
00:14:42,021 --> 00:14:44,011
But there was nothing.
326
00:14:44,009 --> 00:14:45,019
Carrie, Carrie.
327
00:14:46,001 --> 00:14:47,021
I'm just gonna go and
say goodbye to the pastor.
328
00:14:47,023 --> 00:14:49,023
It was lovely
meeting you.
329
00:14:52,010 --> 00:14:53,020
"My friend, Carrie"?
330
00:14:53,021 --> 00:14:56,001
You show up at church
after I asked you not to.
331
00:14:56,004 --> 00:14:57,024
What are you trying to do,
test me?
332
00:14:57,023 --> 00:15:00,013
Why all the sudden interest
in meeting my mother?
333
00:15:00,012 --> 00:15:02,002
Well, has the woman
ever even heard of me?
334
00:15:02,006 --> 00:15:04,016
My mother doesn't need
to meet another girlfriend.
335
00:15:05,014 --> 00:15:07,004
Oh.
336
00:15:07,022 --> 00:15:10,002
I didn't mean that--
337
00:15:11,011 --> 00:15:12,011
I mean,
338
00:15:12,013 --> 00:15:15,013
I'll introduce you as
my girlfriend when I'm sure.
339
00:15:15,011 --> 00:15:17,011
Oh.
340
00:15:17,008 --> 00:15:21,008
Look, I have to do things
on my time frame.
341
00:15:21,013 --> 00:15:23,003
Time frame?
342
00:15:23,005 --> 00:15:25,005
We've been going out
for months.
343
00:15:28,015 --> 00:15:31,015
I really don't know
what else to say to you.
344
00:15:31,018 --> 00:15:32,018
We'll get there.
345
00:15:33,001 --> 00:15:34,021
You just have to have
a little faith.
346
00:15:35,000 --> 00:15:36,000
Faith?
347
00:15:36,003 --> 00:15:37,023
Yeah.
348
00:15:37,018 --> 00:15:39,018
Look, in a couple days
we're going on vacation,
349
00:15:39,020 --> 00:15:40,020
we'll have plenty of time
to talk this out.
350
00:15:41,000 --> 00:15:43,010
Right now I've got to get
my mother home, okay?
351
00:15:43,013 --> 00:15:44,023
Well, go.
352
00:15:46,018 --> 00:15:48,008
Just go.
353
00:16:04,013 --> 00:16:06,003
Move over.
354
00:16:11,015 --> 00:16:13,005
I didn't leave.
355
00:16:13,015 --> 00:16:15,015
You didn't
seem fine.
356
00:16:15,022 --> 00:16:19,002
He introduced me to
his mother as a friend.
357
00:16:20,018 --> 00:16:22,008
She never
heard of me.
358
00:16:23,016 --> 00:16:25,016
That isn't
a good sign.
359
00:16:27,010 --> 00:16:29,000
Maybe they're
not that close.
360
00:16:29,002 --> 00:16:31,012
Come on, don't lie,
you're in a church.
361
00:16:36,008 --> 00:16:38,008
I can't
get inside.
362
00:16:40,003 --> 00:16:43,003
I don't know
what else I can do.
363
00:16:43,003 --> 00:16:44,023
[disco music playing]
364
00:16:44,023 --> 00:16:47,023
[Carrie] Later that night,
in the church of disco,
365
00:16:47,019 --> 00:16:49,009
Stanford invited
everyone he knew
366
00:16:49,016 --> 00:16:51,996
to a party to introduce
a new fragrance...
367
00:16:52,005 --> 00:16:54,005
Fallen Angel.
368
00:16:55,017 --> 00:16:57,007
[Stanford] Hi, Carrie.
369
00:16:57,007 --> 00:16:58,017
Carrie!
370
00:16:58,019 --> 00:17:02,019
[Carrie] Also, he wanted to show
off his new boyfriend, Alanne.
371
00:17:03,021 --> 00:17:05,021
-Hi.
-Isn't this fun?
372
00:17:05,019 --> 00:17:08,009
It's like hell
with a cover charge.
373
00:17:08,011 --> 00:17:10,001
Carrie,
this is Alanne.
374
00:17:10,004 --> 00:17:11,014
Alanne, Carrie.
375
00:17:11,015 --> 00:17:13,005
Hi, nice to meet you
finally.
376
00:17:13,010 --> 00:17:14,010
You, too.
377
00:17:14,007 --> 00:17:15,007
Did I tell you
that Alanne
378
00:17:15,016 --> 00:17:17,016
designed
the Fallen Angel bottle?
379
00:17:18,020 --> 00:17:20,010
Yes, congratulations!
380
00:17:20,014 --> 00:17:22,014
Thank you.
381
00:17:22,009 --> 00:17:23,009
Excuse me
for a second.
382
00:17:23,015 --> 00:17:26,005
I just saw someone
I want to say hello to.
383
00:17:31,005 --> 00:17:32,995
So you know
what we did today?
384
00:17:33,005 --> 00:17:36,015
We shopped for
deco cabinet handles
385
00:17:36,017 --> 00:17:37,017
for his armoire.
386
00:17:38,001 --> 00:17:39,021
I turned into one of those
couples we hate,
387
00:17:39,019 --> 00:17:41,009
and I'm loving it!
388
00:17:41,014 --> 00:17:44,014
[Carrie] Stanford and Alanne
worshiped the same God...
389
00:17:44,016 --> 00:17:45,016
style.
390
00:17:45,020 --> 00:17:49,010
So, you all excited
for the big "vacationné"?
391
00:17:49,009 --> 00:17:50,019
Oh, I don't know.
392
00:17:50,018 --> 00:17:51,018
I can't help
feeling like
393
00:17:51,022 --> 00:17:53,022
it's some sort of
consolation prize
394
00:17:53,018 --> 00:17:55,018
for not letting me
in his life.
395
00:17:55,018 --> 00:17:57,018
Well, what is going on
with you two?
396
00:17:57,022 --> 00:17:59,022
We're not
in the greatest place.
397
00:18:00,000 --> 00:18:02,000
What happened?
398
00:18:02,005 --> 00:18:04,015
He wouldn't introduce me
to his mother.
399
00:18:05,007 --> 00:18:06,007
Ouch.
400
00:18:09,002 --> 00:18:10,012
Thanks.
401
00:18:11,007 --> 00:18:13,007
Skipper, hi.
402
00:18:13,009 --> 00:18:16,019
[Carrie]
It seems Stanford had invited
everyone in his rolodex.
403
00:18:16,022 --> 00:18:18,022
I, uh, I was hoping
I'd see you here.
404
00:18:18,023 --> 00:18:22,013
I've been totally thinking
about you since we broke up.
405
00:18:22,008 --> 00:18:23,008
You have?
406
00:18:23,009 --> 00:18:24,009
Totally.
407
00:18:25,023 --> 00:18:27,023
You look great.
408
00:18:27,023 --> 00:18:29,013
Thanks.
409
00:18:29,021 --> 00:18:31,001
So do you.
410
00:18:31,002 --> 00:18:32,022
[Carrie]
Miranda looked at Skipper,
411
00:18:32,019 --> 00:18:35,019
the months apart had shed
a new light on him.
412
00:18:36,001 --> 00:18:37,011
Actually, they'd shed
a new light
413
00:18:37,012 --> 00:18:39,022
on his shower-free
feelings about sex.
414
00:18:40,015 --> 00:18:41,015
Later that night,
415
00:18:41,017 --> 00:18:43,017
the three of us tracked Samantha
to the ladies room
416
00:18:44,001 --> 00:18:46,011
to get the lowdown
on her love life with James.
417
00:18:46,007 --> 00:18:48,007
Here you are, we've been
looking for you everywhere.
418
00:18:48,015 --> 00:18:51,005
So, how is everything?
419
00:18:51,015 --> 00:18:53,995
She means have
you and James done it yet?
420
00:18:54,013 --> 00:18:55,023
Mm-hmm.
421
00:18:55,018 --> 00:18:56,998
And?
422
00:18:58,014 --> 00:19:00,004
It's nice.
423
00:19:00,004 --> 00:19:02,004
I'm so happy for you.
424
00:19:05,005 --> 00:19:07,015
Sweetie, what-- what?
What is it?
425
00:19:07,023 --> 00:19:09,013
Nothing.
426
00:19:13,017 --> 00:19:15,007
[Carrie] Hey. Hey!
427
00:19:15,012 --> 00:19:17,022
What's going on?
Why are you crying?
428
00:19:18,013 --> 00:19:19,023
James has
a small dick.
429
00:19:19,023 --> 00:19:23,003
Oh, well, it's not
the end of the world.
430
00:19:23,003 --> 00:19:24,023
-It's really small.
-How small?
431
00:19:25,001 --> 00:19:27,011
-Too small.
-Well, size isn't everything.
432
00:19:27,010 --> 00:19:28,010
Three inches?
433
00:19:28,011 --> 00:19:29,021
Well...
434
00:19:29,018 --> 00:19:31,998
-Hard?
-[Carrie grunts]
435
00:19:32,004 --> 00:19:33,014
Is he
a good kisser?
436
00:19:33,013 --> 00:19:35,003
[Samantha]
Oh, who the fuck cares?
437
00:19:35,006 --> 00:19:37,006
His dick is like
a gherkin!
438
00:19:37,011 --> 00:19:38,021
I feel so terrible.
439
00:19:38,020 --> 00:19:40,020
Listen to me,
I'm a bad person.
440
00:19:40,021 --> 00:19:42,011
Don't beat
yourself up.
441
00:19:42,007 --> 00:19:44,007
You had certain expectations
and you're disappointed.
442
00:19:44,013 --> 00:19:46,013
Why?
443
00:19:46,014 --> 00:19:48,024
Why does he have
to have a small dick?
444
00:19:49,014 --> 00:19:51,004
I really like him.
445
00:19:51,006 --> 00:19:52,016
I thought
you loved him.
446
00:19:53,001 --> 00:19:53,021
Well...
447
00:19:53,023 --> 00:19:56,003
Oh, look,
we've all been there.
448
00:19:56,003 --> 00:19:57,003
That's for sure.
449
00:19:57,003 --> 00:19:58,023
I was once with a guy
the size of one of those
450
00:19:58,023 --> 00:20:00,023
little miniature
golf pencils.
451
00:20:00,018 --> 00:20:03,008
I couldn't tell if he was
trying to fuck me or erase me.
452
00:20:06,000 --> 00:20:08,010
I'm-- I'm sorry, it's just--
it's funny.
453
00:20:08,012 --> 00:20:10,022
Let's not
lose perspective.
454
00:20:10,021 --> 00:20:12,011
There are ways
to work around it.
455
00:20:12,013 --> 00:20:14,023
[Samantha]
Well, I don't want to work
around it.
456
00:20:14,018 --> 00:20:15,998
I love a big dick.
457
00:20:16,005 --> 00:20:17,015
I love it
inside of me.
458
00:20:17,020 --> 00:20:20,020
I love looking at it,
I love everything about it.
459
00:20:22,005 --> 00:20:23,015
When I blow him,
it's like...
460
00:20:25,004 --> 00:20:28,004
Nothing.
461
00:20:28,005 --> 00:20:29,015
Can you talk to him
about it?
462
00:20:30,000 --> 00:20:31,010
No.
463
00:20:31,013 --> 00:20:34,013
It's the only thing
we can't talk about.
464
00:20:36,023 --> 00:20:38,023
What am I gonna do?
465
00:20:39,012 --> 00:20:41,022
How is he
with his tongue?
466
00:20:44,017 --> 00:20:46,007
[Carrie]
Charlotte left us all behind
467
00:20:46,007 --> 00:20:48,017
telling us she had another
party to go to.
468
00:20:50,011 --> 00:20:52,011
She took a cab
to a part of town
469
00:20:52,010 --> 00:20:54,020
never mentioned in
The New Yorker.
470
00:20:55,001 --> 00:20:56,021
Will I ever
get married?
471
00:21:00,011 --> 00:21:03,001
[man] I call the power
of all the saints.
472
00:21:03,006 --> 00:21:04,006
Saint Lazarus.
473
00:21:04,010 --> 00:21:05,020
Santa Rosa.
474
00:21:05,019 --> 00:21:07,999
Saint Rosa,
send me your guidance.
475
00:21:08,002 --> 00:21:09,012
[chanting in Spanish]
476
00:21:09,015 --> 00:21:10,005
Send me the truth.
477
00:21:10,016 --> 00:21:13,996
[continues chanting in Spanish]
478
00:21:14,004 --> 00:21:15,024
[man] Send me an answer.
479
00:21:27,002 --> 00:21:28,022
No yolk.
480
00:21:28,018 --> 00:21:29,018
What does that mean?
481
00:21:30,001 --> 00:21:31,021
[woman speaking in Spanish]
482
00:21:31,018 --> 00:21:32,998
You'll never be married.
483
00:21:33,003 --> 00:21:35,013
[woman continues speaking
in Spanish]
484
00:21:35,012 --> 00:21:36,022
You are cursed.
485
00:21:38,006 --> 00:21:38,996
But do not worry,
486
00:21:39,003 --> 00:21:42,013
for the hundred dollars,
we can remove it.
487
00:21:48,004 --> 00:21:49,014
[Carrie]
The entire way home,
488
00:21:49,014 --> 00:21:52,024
Charlotte berated herself
for being so foolish.
489
00:21:52,017 --> 00:21:54,007
She simply refused
to give into the idea
490
00:21:54,016 --> 00:21:56,006
that she would
never get married.
491
00:21:56,013 --> 00:21:57,013
-Sorry.
-Sorry.
492
00:21:57,014 --> 00:21:59,024
[Carrie] All she had to do
was keep believing
493
00:21:59,017 --> 00:22:01,007
and it would happen.
494
00:22:04,008 --> 00:22:06,018
It was 3:00 a.m.
in the church of disco,
495
00:22:06,019 --> 00:22:09,019
and Miranda couldn't believe
what she was about to say.
496
00:22:09,017 --> 00:22:11,017
You want to
spend the night?
497
00:22:11,017 --> 00:22:12,007
The night?
498
00:22:12,015 --> 00:22:14,015
The whole night?
499
00:22:15,000 --> 00:22:17,010
Yeah,
the whole night.
500
00:22:20,021 --> 00:22:22,011
I knew we'd
get back together.
501
00:22:22,014 --> 00:22:24,004
You did, huh?
502
00:22:24,020 --> 00:22:25,020
Yup...
503
00:22:26,001 --> 00:22:29,011
Every night I'd light a candle
and say a little prayer.
504
00:22:30,009 --> 00:22:31,019
You're a freak.
505
00:22:33,011 --> 00:22:35,011
[Carrie] Samantha tried
desperately to believe
506
00:22:35,016 --> 00:22:37,016
that love was
stronger than sex.
507
00:22:38,000 --> 00:22:39,010
[crying]
508
00:22:39,013 --> 00:22:40,023
Why are you crying?
509
00:22:42,009 --> 00:22:44,009
I'm just so happy.
510
00:22:47,010 --> 00:22:49,020
[crying]
511
00:22:49,020 --> 00:22:51,000
[Carrie]
I stayed up all night
512
00:22:51,006 --> 00:22:52,016
questioning
my faith in faith.
513
00:22:53,001 --> 00:22:56,011
I mean, hadn't I had faith
in us all along?
514
00:22:56,015 --> 00:22:58,005
[door buzzing]
515
00:23:01,023 --> 00:23:04,013
Faith that all
the withholding would stop...
516
00:23:06,012 --> 00:23:08,022
Faith that he'd say,
"I love you."
517
00:23:09,000 --> 00:23:10,010
Let's go!
518
00:23:10,008 --> 00:23:13,998
Hey, hurry,
we're gonna miss the plane.
519
00:23:14,005 --> 00:23:16,005
Wait, wait, wait,
put them down a second.
520
00:23:17,013 --> 00:23:19,003
Just put them down.
521
00:23:21,007 --> 00:23:22,007
Okay.
522
00:23:23,017 --> 00:23:25,007
What?
523
00:23:26,012 --> 00:23:28,022
I need a sign.
524
00:23:29,000 --> 00:23:33,000
I mean, you told me
to have faith, but see, um,
525
00:23:33,004 --> 00:23:36,014
I'm kind of
losing mine, so, so...
526
00:23:37,012 --> 00:23:38,022
I need a sign.
527
00:23:38,019 --> 00:23:41,009
What, like in those
old religious movies,
528
00:23:41,007 --> 00:23:43,007
you want a voice
from above?
529
00:23:43,014 --> 00:23:45,014
Just tell me
I'm the one.
530
00:23:46,021 --> 00:23:49,011
Come on, you don't
have to tell your mother
531
00:23:49,012 --> 00:23:51,022
or the whole world,
just...
532
00:23:53,020 --> 00:23:55,010
Just tell me.
533
00:24:11,009 --> 00:24:13,009
I can't do this.
534
00:24:14,007 --> 00:24:16,007
Carrie, Carrie.
535
00:24:17,022 --> 00:24:22,002
Carrie, just get
in the car, please.
536
00:24:23,013 --> 00:24:24,023
I can't.
537
00:24:26,016 --> 00:24:28,016
I love you, but I can't.
538
00:24:34,011 --> 00:24:36,011
So that's it?
539
00:24:50,002 --> 00:24:52,002
♪ No regrets ♪
540
00:24:53,022 --> 00:25:00,012
♪ Although our love affair
has gone astray ♪
541
00:25:00,009 --> 00:25:05,009
♪ No regrets ♪
542
00:25:05,010 --> 00:25:08,000
[Carrie] After he left,
I cried for a week.
543
00:25:10,005 --> 00:25:12,015
And then I realized
I do have faith...
544
00:25:12,023 --> 00:25:15,023
Faith in myself.
545
00:25:15,023 --> 00:25:18,013
Faith that I would
one day meet someone
546
00:25:18,016 --> 00:25:21,996
who would be sure
that I was the one.
547
00:25:22,005 --> 00:25:27,005
♪ Still in my heart
you'll be ♪
548
00:25:27,023 --> 00:25:32,023
♪ Forever mine ♪
549
00:25:34,000 --> 00:25:37,010
♪ No regrets ♪