1
00:00:51,009 --> 00:00:53,804
I ran into my friend, Skipper,
on the street the other day.
2
00:00:54,054 --> 00:00:57,474
He was bruised and frantic.
He'd just broken up with another girl.
3
00:00:57,558 --> 00:00:59,518
I mean,
I thought everything was going fine.
4
00:00:59,601 --> 00:01:01,562
That's when they tiptoe up
and clobber you.
5
00:01:01,645 --> 00:01:03,730
Well, what did she say
she thought was wrong?
6
00:01:04,815 --> 00:01:07,150
Skipper, you're a very sweet guy.
7
00:01:07,734 --> 00:01:09,403
I mean,
this isn't about anything you did.
8
00:01:09,486 --> 00:01:12,656
It's just that we're in very
different places right now.
9
00:01:12,739 --> 00:01:14,700
We want different things from life.
10
00:01:15,450 --> 00:01:17,536
I feel like I need to
spend more time alone.
11
00:01:17,619 --> 00:01:19,746
So, actually, we want the same thing.
12
00:01:19,830 --> 00:01:21,915
We both wanna spend more time with you.
13
00:01:22,332 --> 00:01:25,294
Three months before that,
it was a dental hygienist named Tiffany.
14
00:01:25,377 --> 00:01:27,671
The timing is wrong, that's all.
15
00:01:28,130 --> 00:01:30,257
You're one of the nicest guys
I've ever known.
16
00:01:30,591 --> 00:01:34,052
It's just that I feel like I've reached
a time in my life
17
00:01:34,219 --> 00:01:36,096
when I need to focus on my career.
18
00:01:36,305 --> 00:01:38,307
And I don't wanna
feel guilty about that.
19
00:01:38,390 --> 00:01:40,183
But I don't want you
to give up your career.
20
00:01:40,267 --> 00:01:42,811
I know. I know. You've been great.
21
00:01:43,103 --> 00:01:46,273
You really deserve someone
who will appreciate you.
22
00:01:46,815 --> 00:01:49,735
I just don't feel like I have
anything to give at the moment.
23
00:01:50,235 --> 00:01:53,113
And last year, it was Miranda.
24
00:01:53,363 --> 00:01:56,033
I feel like I need to
spend more time alone.
25
00:01:57,284 --> 00:02:01,288
I've just reached a point in my life
where I need to focus on my career.
26
00:02:02,039 --> 00:02:04,666
I just don't think that I have
anything to give at the moment.
27
00:02:05,626 --> 00:02:07,336
Skipper, what else can I say?
28
00:02:07,794 --> 00:02:09,838
I have such
horrible luck with women.
29
00:02:10,255 --> 00:02:12,507
I totally should've seen this coming,
but of course, I didn't.
30
00:02:12,924 --> 00:02:16,803
Because they wait for you
to get relaxed and get comfortable
31
00:02:16,887 --> 00:02:19,806
before they bring the ice pick
down right between your eyes.
32
00:02:19,890 --> 00:02:20,974
Not all women,
33
00:02:21,058 --> 00:02:23,435
just the types of women
you seem to be attracted to.
34
00:02:23,518 --> 00:02:26,104
Yeah. Over and over and over again.
35
00:02:26,563 --> 00:02:29,107
Well, those ladies don't know
what they're missing,
36
00:02:29,191 --> 00:02:30,734
and missing and missing.
37
00:02:30,901 --> 00:02:32,736
Skipper's pattern was
clear to both of us.
38
00:02:33,028 --> 00:02:35,989
He was a sweet guy who was
perpetually attracted to women
39
00:02:36,073 --> 00:02:37,282
who were looking for jerks.
40
00:02:37,908 --> 00:02:39,951
Later that night, on a date across town,
41
00:02:40,035 --> 00:02:42,287
Miranda was repeating
a pattern of her own.
42
00:02:42,371 --> 00:02:45,707
She had been dating a lawyer she met
when they got into a big fight in court.
43
00:02:45,999 --> 00:02:50,128
A frequent guest on MSNBC,
Kevin was not just argumentative,
44
00:02:50,253 --> 00:02:51,880
he was an anger professional.
45
00:02:52,172 --> 00:02:54,257
You know,
I think I gotta revise my opinion
46
00:02:54,341 --> 00:02:57,469
that you gotta be an idiot to want to
go out to a movie these days.
47
00:02:57,552 --> 00:03:01,431
I mean, it was worth the $19,
plus $10 in snacks and water,
48
00:03:01,515 --> 00:03:04,851
just to hear that bus driver behind us
explaining filmmaking to his wife.
49
00:03:04,935 --> 00:03:07,104
He certainly had
some wonderful insights to share.
50
00:03:07,187 --> 00:03:09,898
But at least, on the bright side,
it was an interesting movie, right?
51
00:03:09,981 --> 00:03:11,817
Oh, yeah, right.
It was a real Citizen Kane.
52
00:03:11,900 --> 00:03:14,194
Well, I thought the actor who played
Carlo was kind of charming.
53
00:03:14,277 --> 00:03:17,656
That moron looked like he walked into
work before the anesthesia
54
00:03:17,739 --> 00:03:18,949
wore off from his lobotomy.
55
00:03:19,032 --> 00:03:21,284
All right, all right,
I'll just get us a cab, okay?
56
00:03:21,743 --> 00:03:22,744
Taxi!
57
00:03:22,828 --> 00:03:24,830
You gotta face uptown
to get a cab around here.
58
00:03:25,414 --> 00:03:27,541
I've caught plenty of cabs this way.
59
00:03:27,624 --> 00:03:29,918
Yeah, in Never-Never land,
where people constantly confuse
60
00:03:30,001 --> 00:03:32,087
a complete lack of talent with charm.
61
00:03:33,797 --> 00:03:35,924
Come on, Gene Shalit,
get in the damn cab.
62
00:03:37,050 --> 00:03:38,093
Come on.
63
00:03:39,803 --> 00:03:41,179
Get in, sore loser.
64
00:03:41,346 --> 00:03:42,806
Come on, in.
65
00:03:43,724 --> 00:03:45,600
-In, come on.
-Jesus!
66
00:03:46,476 --> 00:03:49,479
Miranda hated how he ordered
her around and told her what do,
67
00:03:49,855 --> 00:03:51,773
every place except one.
68
00:03:52,941 --> 00:03:54,234
Put your hands up over your head.
69
00:03:59,197 --> 00:04:00,282
Spread your legs.
70
00:04:11,710 --> 00:04:17,299
The weird thing is, when he tells me
what to do in life, it drives me crazy.
71
00:04:17,382 --> 00:04:21,011
But when tells me what to do during sex,
it really drives me crazy.
72
00:04:21,094 --> 00:04:22,345
-Oh.
-It's totally hot!
73
00:04:22,929 --> 00:04:24,055
That looks like a good spot.
74
00:04:24,556 --> 00:04:26,141
Everybody, check for park poo.
75
00:04:26,391 --> 00:04:27,726
I mean, isn't that funny?
76
00:04:28,185 --> 00:04:31,062
That what I hate in life, I love in sex?
77
00:04:31,188 --> 00:04:34,858
So, how about if you limit
your contact with him to just sex?
78
00:04:35,066 --> 00:04:37,319
Oh, that's a nice, healthy relationship.
79
00:04:37,569 --> 00:04:40,071
The thing is, I'm not ready yet,
to throw in the towel.
80
00:04:40,155 --> 00:04:41,698
No, you're just ready to
wrap it around his neck.
81
00:04:43,200 --> 00:04:46,703
He's going through a very stressful time
waiting to make partner at his firm.
82
00:04:46,787 --> 00:04:49,706
When that finally works out,
I think maybe he'll lighten up a bit.
83
00:04:49,873 --> 00:04:53,043
Or maybe you should face the fact
that you're attracted to angry guys.
84
00:04:53,126 --> 00:04:55,712
-Deviled eggs?
-Wait a second, hold the eggs!
85
00:04:55,796 --> 00:04:58,006
What about Skipper? He never got angry.
86
00:04:58,089 --> 00:04:59,841
Yeah. And you dumped him.
Fits a pattern.
87
00:04:59,925 --> 00:05:01,176
I don't have a pattern.
88
00:05:01,259 --> 00:05:03,345
In math,
randomness is considered a pattern.
89
00:05:03,428 --> 00:05:06,181
Yes, and I'm what they call
a prime number.
90
00:05:06,681 --> 00:05:08,600
She's got a very obvious pattern,
you know?
91
00:05:08,975 --> 00:05:11,228
I do? What? Tell me!
92
00:05:11,478 --> 00:05:14,356
You wait for a perfect guy
to ask you on a perfect date--
93
00:05:14,439 --> 00:05:17,901
And when he does,
you project this huge fantasy on him,
94
00:05:17,984 --> 00:05:20,195
setting up these enormous expectations--
95
00:05:20,278 --> 00:05:22,489
Which promptly blow up
in your pretty little face.
96
00:05:22,572 --> 00:05:24,950
You put all your deviled eggs
in one basket, so to speak.
97
00:05:25,367 --> 00:05:26,827
That's a horrible pattern.
98
00:05:26,993 --> 00:05:29,120
Well, spread it around a little more.
99
00:05:29,204 --> 00:05:32,624
Date a few guys at once
and then you won't feel so disappointed.
100
00:05:32,707 --> 00:05:36,253
-Are you asking Charlotte to juggle?
-It's all about multi-tasking.
101
00:05:36,628 --> 00:05:39,923
None of us can afford to fall into this
"one man at a time" pattern.
102
00:05:40,006 --> 00:05:42,551
I mean, look at how much time
you wasted with Big.
103
00:05:42,759 --> 00:05:44,344
Yeah, but Big was an aberration.
104
00:05:44,427 --> 00:05:46,429
Next time I meet a handsome, wealthy,
105
00:05:46,555 --> 00:05:48,139
and emotionally unavailable
43-year-old man,
106
00:05:48,223 --> 00:05:49,432
I'll know what to expect.
107
00:05:49,516 --> 00:05:50,433
Will you?
108
00:05:50,600 --> 00:05:52,894
Or will you just make the same mistake
all over again?
109
00:05:53,520 --> 00:05:54,521
I wondered,
110
00:05:54,604 --> 00:05:57,399
were we all just victims
of conditioned responses?
111
00:05:57,774 --> 00:06:00,861
Doomed to repeat the same
unconscious relationship patterns?
112
00:06:01,319 --> 00:06:03,780
Were we all, in fact, just dating
113
00:06:04,114 --> 00:06:06,575
the same person over and over again?
114
00:06:06,908 --> 00:06:09,744
Well, I guess I have dated
quite a few artists.
115
00:06:09,870 --> 00:06:12,247
But I don't think they were
all the same person.
116
00:06:12,497 --> 00:06:16,751
Okay, yes. They were all narcissists
with commitment phobias
117
00:06:16,835 --> 00:06:18,295
and substance abuse issues.
118
00:06:18,378 --> 00:06:22,340
But, in my opinion, the painters
were very different from the sculptors.
119
00:06:23,341 --> 00:06:25,969
Handsome waspy assholes
who treat me like shit.
120
00:06:26,177 --> 00:06:28,430
I only date girls
with Sony Playstations.
121
00:06:28,555 --> 00:06:29,764
Or breasts.
122
00:06:32,183 --> 00:06:34,144
That night, Samantha
became acquainted
123
00:06:34,227 --> 00:06:35,645
with the new neighbors next door.
124
00:06:37,772 --> 00:06:39,774
Though she had never met them
face to face,
125
00:06:39,858 --> 00:06:41,359
she already knew them intimately.
126
00:06:44,279 --> 00:06:47,490
The idea that someone else
was having great sex and flaunting it
127
00:06:47,574 --> 00:06:48,909
was more than she could bear.
128
00:06:49,492 --> 00:06:52,037
So she decided, if you can't join 'em,
129
00:06:53,413 --> 00:06:54,414
beat it.
130
00:06:57,500 --> 00:07:00,045
It all fit Samantha's pattern to a T.
131
00:07:01,046 --> 00:07:04,507
Having a wall between her
and the person she was having sex with.
132
00:07:06,009 --> 00:07:08,303
After a few weeks of not seeing Big,
133
00:07:08,386 --> 00:07:11,765
I was beginning to fall into
some familiar patterns of my own.
134
00:07:11,973 --> 00:07:14,559
Staying out till 3:00 a.m.
and sleeping till noon,
135
00:07:14,643 --> 00:07:17,103
ordering takeout from
the same greasy Chinese,
136
00:07:17,270 --> 00:07:21,358
and calling old friends who would always
be there for me when I was feeling...
137
00:07:21,900 --> 00:07:22,901
restless.
138
00:07:25,236 --> 00:07:26,529
McFadden.
139
00:07:26,655 --> 00:07:28,114
Hey John, it's Carrie.
140
00:07:28,406 --> 00:07:31,368
Carrie, hey, how are you? Long time.
141
00:07:31,493 --> 00:07:35,205
Yeah, I know. Listen, I thought
if you weren't doing anything,
142
00:07:35,372 --> 00:07:37,540
you might want to meet
for a drink after work.
143
00:07:37,791 --> 00:07:39,292
Yeah. Sure, that would be great.
144
00:07:39,376 --> 00:07:41,378
How about six-ish?
145
00:07:41,461 --> 00:07:42,963
I could be there about 6:30.
146
00:07:43,046 --> 00:07:44,214
Perfect, I'll see you then.
147
00:07:49,427 --> 00:07:51,471
That evening, at 6:30 sharp,
148
00:07:54,599 --> 00:07:57,477
-Hey! You, too.
-Hey. Wow, it's great to see you.
149
00:07:57,560 --> 00:07:58,436
Wow.
150
00:07:58,520 --> 00:08:01,189
Come on in. I was just gonna
open up a bottle of red.
151
00:08:01,272 --> 00:08:02,899
Oh, red, yeah, beautiful.
152
00:08:03,692 --> 00:08:06,778
I just... I gotta be somewhere by 8:30.
153
00:08:07,529 --> 00:08:09,364
Oh, that's okay.
I've got dinner plans at 8:00.
154
00:08:09,447 --> 00:08:10,532
Okay.
155
00:08:12,742 --> 00:08:13,743
Hm.
156
00:08:21,960 --> 00:08:25,380
John was as dependable a pal
as a gal could ever hope for.
157
00:08:26,756 --> 00:08:29,175
Fun, comfortable and easy to be with.
158
00:08:29,634 --> 00:08:31,886
The kind of guy who you
could shed all inhibitions
159
00:08:31,970 --> 00:08:33,680
and really be yourself around.
160
00:08:33,888 --> 00:08:36,599
No muss... no fuss.
161
00:08:37,183 --> 00:08:38,435
Phew.
162
00:08:41,354 --> 00:08:43,064
So how's the...
163
00:08:43,898 --> 00:08:45,859
-going?
- Great.
164
00:08:46,609 --> 00:08:47,527
It's great.
165
00:08:47,986 --> 00:08:49,946
-How's work with you?
-Never dull.
166
00:08:50,655 --> 00:08:51,740
Never dull.
167
00:08:52,782 --> 00:08:55,368
How's your younger sister doing?
168
00:08:55,535 --> 00:08:56,536
Brother.
169
00:08:58,038 --> 00:09:01,624
The one that moved to Phoenix?
170
00:09:02,042 --> 00:09:03,960
-Tallahassee. Yeah.
-Right.
171
00:09:05,253 --> 00:09:07,130
So how's he doing down there?
172
00:09:07,338 --> 00:09:09,424
-He's doing great, thanks for asking.
-Sure.
173
00:09:14,471 --> 00:09:16,139
And then I realized it.
174
00:09:16,514 --> 00:09:20,810
I didn't have a relationship pattern,
I had a between-relationship pattern.
175
00:09:21,186 --> 00:09:23,980
I always went back to John
after every devastating,
176
00:09:24,064 --> 00:09:25,940
soul-shattering, gut-wrenching break up.
177
00:09:26,399 --> 00:09:28,735
He was sweet, handsome, uncomplicated.
178
00:09:28,943 --> 00:09:31,446
A real shot in the arm
for my sexual self-esteem.
179
00:09:31,529 --> 00:09:32,947
Thanks for the call, gorgeous.
180
00:09:36,743 --> 00:09:38,578
Sure put a cherry on my sundae.
181
00:09:39,537 --> 00:09:42,123
Why had I been keeping him
on the bench all these years?
182
00:09:42,582 --> 00:09:46,169
Did I really believe a relationship
had to be difficult in order to work?
183
00:09:48,004 --> 00:09:49,089
Hey.
184
00:09:49,756 --> 00:09:51,299
Do you want to have dinner Friday night?
185
00:09:51,800 --> 00:09:52,801
Dinner?
186
00:09:52,926 --> 00:09:54,511
Uh, yeah.
187
00:09:55,053 --> 00:09:57,180
Sure. I should check my schedule,
but I think I can make it.
188
00:09:57,430 --> 00:09:58,389
Great.
189
00:09:58,556 --> 00:09:59,974
You want to say, like...
190
00:10:00,308 --> 00:10:01,392
eight o' clock?
191
00:10:01,643 --> 00:10:02,852
How about 8: 15?
192
00:10:03,061 --> 00:10:05,897
And just like that,
I broke my pattern.
193
00:10:07,148 --> 00:10:09,943
Carrie, you can't date your fuck buddy.
194
00:10:10,026 --> 00:10:13,279
Say it a little louder. I don't think
the old lady in the last row heard you.
195
00:10:13,363 --> 00:10:16,533
You're gonna take the only person
in your life that's there purely for sex
196
00:10:16,616 --> 00:10:18,827
no strings attached,
and turn him into a human being?
197
00:10:18,910 --> 00:10:19,911
Why?
198
00:10:20,411 --> 00:10:22,580
Excuse me, "fuck buddy"?
199
00:10:23,206 --> 00:10:24,874
What is a "fuck buddy"?
200
00:10:24,958 --> 00:10:27,252
-Oh, come on.
201
00:10:28,253 --> 00:10:31,172
A fuck buddy is a guy you probably
dated once or twice,
202
00:10:31,256 --> 00:10:32,423
and it didn't really go anywhere,
203
00:10:32,507 --> 00:10:35,343
but the sex is so great,
you sort of keep him on call.
204
00:10:35,468 --> 00:10:36,845
Hm, he's like "dial-a-dick."
205
00:10:37,053 --> 00:10:42,183
You mean you just call this guy up
when you're, you know, horny?
206
00:10:42,267 --> 00:10:43,560
-Mm-hm.
-Yes.
207
00:10:43,643 --> 00:10:45,061
And he just comes right over?
208
00:10:45,145 --> 00:10:47,856
Well, he's not a slave, sweetheart.
He does have a life.
209
00:10:47,939 --> 00:10:49,774
But you don't really have to
know about it.
210
00:10:49,858 --> 00:10:53,236
And you're generally guaranteed delivery
within Manhattan in six hours or less.
211
00:10:53,653 --> 00:10:55,238
And you guys all have one?
212
00:10:55,488 --> 00:10:58,992
Well, mine moved to Chicago
but now we have phone sex.
213
00:10:59,117 --> 00:11:00,618
What's he doing in Chicago?
214
00:11:00,743 --> 00:11:02,662
I have absolutely no idea.
215
00:11:03,621 --> 00:11:05,915
A few moments later,
emboldened by our conversation,
216
00:11:05,999 --> 00:11:08,459
and high from too many
tantric headstands,
217
00:11:08,793 --> 00:11:11,754
Charlotte asked a man out
for the first time.
218
00:11:11,838 --> 00:11:13,381
Man, that class was tough.
219
00:11:13,715 --> 00:11:15,592
I never sweated so much
in my entire life.
220
00:11:17,468 --> 00:11:19,429
Would you like to go out
to dinner Friday night?
221
00:11:20,638 --> 00:11:21,639
Sure.
222
00:11:25,977 --> 00:11:26,978
I wondered,
223
00:11:27,228 --> 00:11:29,564
if Charlotte could break her pattern
and start asking out
224
00:11:29,689 --> 00:11:32,942
every man in Manhattan, why couldn't
I start having a deeper relationship
225
00:11:33,026 --> 00:11:34,777
with a man I have shallow sex with?
226
00:11:40,533 --> 00:11:42,076
Wow.
227
00:11:42,827 --> 00:11:44,746
You're all dressy. Yeah.
228
00:11:45,330 --> 00:11:46,956
Well, I guess.
229
00:11:48,082 --> 00:11:49,042
Thanks.
230
00:11:49,250 --> 00:11:52,212
The fact was, I wanted to tell him that
he'd never actually seen me in clothes.
231
00:11:52,587 --> 00:11:54,756
Uh, so, do you want
a glass of wine first, or...
232
00:11:54,839 --> 00:11:57,550
No, I'm fine, thanks.
233
00:12:00,720 --> 00:12:03,097
-Hey, wait, wait, wait. Wait.
-Oh.
234
00:12:03,765 --> 00:12:06,184
-I made reservations.
-Huh?
235
00:12:06,559 --> 00:12:08,728
-At a sushi restaurant.
-Oh.
236
00:12:09,812 --> 00:12:12,398
Oh, cool. I see.
237
00:12:12,690 --> 00:12:14,817
No! I mean, God!
238
00:12:15,318 --> 00:12:17,362
I mean sushi.
239
00:12:18,112 --> 00:12:20,240
-Japanese food!
-Oh!
240
00:12:20,323 --> 00:12:22,784
When you said dinner, you meant dinner.
241
00:12:22,909 --> 00:12:23,785
Yeah.
242
00:12:23,868 --> 00:12:25,787
Oh, no. It's just that,
whenever we've had dinner,
243
00:12:25,912 --> 00:12:26,746
we've always, you know--
244
00:12:26,829 --> 00:12:27,956
Yeah, I know. I know.
245
00:12:29,540 --> 00:12:32,418
All right. I'm gonna...
I'm just gonna get my purse.
246
00:12:33,044 --> 00:12:36,172
Like most first dates,
we were off to an awkward start.
247
00:12:45,348 --> 00:12:51,187
Um, the yellow tail sashimi,
two pieces of salmon sushi,
248
00:12:51,271 --> 00:12:53,523
and a spicy tuna hand roll.
249
00:12:53,606 --> 00:12:55,066
Oh, do you like eel?
250
00:12:55,275 --> 00:12:56,567
Uh, no way.
251
00:12:56,651 --> 00:12:59,862
I'll have the chicken teriyaki,
well done.
252
00:13:00,071 --> 00:13:02,657
No, the sushi's so amazing here.
253
00:13:02,740 --> 00:13:03,658
No, I just--
254
00:13:03,783 --> 00:13:05,702
I can't deal with the raw stuff.
Yeah, it just doesn't work.
255
00:13:05,785 --> 00:13:07,829
Well, why didn't you tell me?
We could've gone some place else.
256
00:13:07,912 --> 00:13:10,540
No, don't worry about it.
If I'm hungry, I'll grab a burger after.
257
00:13:10,832 --> 00:13:11,833
Okay.
258
00:13:13,084 --> 00:13:15,503
Oh, hey, listen, before I forget,
259
00:13:16,587 --> 00:13:18,089
this is for you.
260
00:13:18,673 --> 00:13:21,175
Oh! Thanks. What is it?
261
00:13:21,259 --> 00:13:25,471
Forty minutes free long distance,
continental U.S., no strings attached.
262
00:13:25,722 --> 00:13:28,266
It's to promote our new
7-7-3 service, see?
263
00:13:28,349 --> 00:13:31,477
Seven days, seven hours, $3 a day.
264
00:13:32,186 --> 00:13:33,479
Well. Thank you.
265
00:13:33,563 --> 00:13:34,689
So you, like--
266
00:13:34,772 --> 00:13:37,734
Think these gimmicks up? Sort of.
I mean, officially, I sell time.
267
00:13:37,984 --> 00:13:40,945
But I get these incentive minutes which
I can distribute at my own discretion.
268
00:13:41,154 --> 00:13:42,155
Oh.
269
00:13:42,405 --> 00:13:45,033
So, if I'm lucky,
I might get a whole hour next time?
270
00:13:45,116 --> 00:13:46,534
I don't think so. But if you're
271
00:13:46,617 --> 00:13:48,369
currently an MCI customer
and you switch,
272
00:13:48,453 --> 00:13:50,121
then you get two hours for free. Hm?
273
00:13:50,538 --> 00:13:51,748
I was kidding.
274
00:13:51,956 --> 00:13:53,833
Oh. Right, gotcha.
275
00:13:57,712 --> 00:14:00,757
So, maybe we should just
order some sake?
276
00:14:01,174 --> 00:14:02,133
Oh, yeah, sure.
277
00:14:02,216 --> 00:14:03,885
Hey, sake to me!
278
00:14:07,472 --> 00:14:09,432
We went back to my place
for a quickie.
279
00:14:10,850 --> 00:14:14,020
I needed to erase the stagnant
memory of the past two hours.
280
00:14:14,354 --> 00:14:17,231
Was it really possible that
someone so stimulating in bed
281
00:14:17,315 --> 00:14:19,025
could be so tedious in life?
282
00:14:30,536 --> 00:14:33,247
Meanwhile, Samantha was
actually beginning to look forward
283
00:14:33,331 --> 00:14:34,957
to the company of her new neighbors.
284
00:14:36,000 --> 00:14:37,335
Every night, like clockwork,
285
00:14:37,418 --> 00:14:39,796
right after the end of
the 11 o'clock news...
286
00:14:48,137 --> 00:14:51,099
Samantha relished her role as
the invisible guest vocalist
287
00:14:51,182 --> 00:14:52,266
to an unseen band.
288
00:14:58,523 --> 00:15:00,900
Until one night,
she wasn't so invisible.
289
00:15:19,210 --> 00:15:21,129
That Saturday,
Miranda planned for us all
290
00:15:21,212 --> 00:15:22,922
to meet her latest fling for brunch.
291
00:15:23,214 --> 00:15:25,591
Apparently, he had
flung himself elsewhere.
292
00:15:25,675 --> 00:15:27,510
He should be here any minute, really.
293
00:15:27,593 --> 00:15:29,720
Hey, don't worry about it.
If it's just us, it's fine.
294
00:15:29,804 --> 00:15:31,931
It's not like we've got
anywhere else to go.
295
00:15:32,181 --> 00:15:33,474
I do have a date tonight.
296
00:15:33,558 --> 00:15:35,351
-With whom?
-That yoga guy.
297
00:15:35,643 --> 00:15:36,727
I asked him out.
298
00:15:36,894 --> 00:15:38,938
-Hm?
-Wow, I'm impressed.
299
00:15:39,188 --> 00:15:42,358
You know, once I broke the ice with him,
it was just like riding a bike.
300
00:15:42,817 --> 00:15:45,945
I have so many dates this week,
that I just scheduled two in one night.
301
00:15:46,070 --> 00:15:48,322
-You double-booked?
-Well, I had to.
302
00:15:48,406 --> 00:15:50,116
This one guy was going out of town
for three weeks,
303
00:15:50,199 --> 00:15:51,659
and the other guy,
I didn't wanna cancel.
304
00:15:51,742 --> 00:15:53,870
So, how do you conceive
pulling this one off?
305
00:15:53,953 --> 00:15:56,998
Early dinner with bachelor one,
late supper with bachelor two.
306
00:15:57,081 --> 00:15:59,792
My God, you're turning into a man.
307
00:15:59,876 --> 00:16:02,545
Apparently, Charlotte had done
more than break a pattern.
308
00:16:02,628 --> 00:16:04,505
She had actually changed genders.
309
00:16:05,339 --> 00:16:08,176
I just don't know how I'm ever
gonna eat two dinners in a row.
310
00:16:08,259 --> 00:16:11,220
And then, just like that,
she was a woman again.
311
00:16:11,471 --> 00:16:12,472
Sorry, babe.
312
00:16:12,555 --> 00:16:16,267
The idiot who drove me here apparently
passed his driving test in Bangladesh.
313
00:16:16,767 --> 00:16:19,520
I'm just happy to get off
that fuckin' rickshaw in one piece.
314
00:16:19,604 --> 00:16:22,982
Kevin, this is Carrie,
and Samantha and Charlotte.
315
00:16:23,065 --> 00:16:24,525
-This is Kevin.
-Oh, it's nice to meet you.
316
00:16:24,609 --> 00:16:26,360
I have to go make a quick phone call,
I'll be right back.
317
00:16:26,694 --> 00:16:28,321
Waitress! Draft beer here.
318
00:16:30,615 --> 00:16:31,741
He's cute.
319
00:16:31,824 --> 00:16:33,910
In a tightly wound sort of way.
320
00:16:33,993 --> 00:16:36,746
He's finding out on Tuesday
whether he made partner.
321
00:16:36,913 --> 00:16:39,957
I'm keeping my fingers crossed
that he'll unwind some after that.
322
00:16:44,962 --> 00:16:46,088
What are you doing?
323
00:16:46,339 --> 00:16:48,841
I just-- I just don't want him
going off on the waitress.
324
00:16:50,593 --> 00:16:53,262
That evening,
Charlotte set out to break her pattern.
325
00:16:53,387 --> 00:16:55,556
A casual meal with Eric from yoga,
326
00:16:55,640 --> 00:16:58,893
where they discovered a mutual love
for long drives up Maine coasts,
327
00:16:58,976 --> 00:17:00,937
and reruns of "Nanny and the Professor".
328
00:17:01,020 --> 00:17:03,231
-She was psychic, wasn't she?
-Absolutely.
329
00:17:03,314 --> 00:17:05,858
No, but it was very subtle,
very sophisticated.
330
00:17:05,942 --> 00:17:08,528
I don't even think that kids today
would understand it.
331
00:17:08,986 --> 00:17:09,904
No.
332
00:17:10,154 --> 00:17:11,531
I'll tell you something,
when I have kids,
333
00:17:11,781 --> 00:17:13,699
I'm gonna be a total Nazi
with the remote.
334
00:17:13,783 --> 00:17:14,951
I want them to read.
335
00:17:15,034 --> 00:17:16,410
How many kids do you want to have?
336
00:17:16,827 --> 00:17:18,412
Two, one of each.
337
00:17:18,829 --> 00:17:20,039
Sounds perfect.
338
00:17:20,790 --> 00:17:22,875
Just as Charlotte
began to swim in visions
339
00:17:22,959 --> 00:17:24,919
of family summers in Kennebunkport,
340
00:17:25,211 --> 00:17:27,380
she realized she was late
for the second shift.
341
00:17:27,547 --> 00:17:28,548
Oh, my God.
342
00:17:29,632 --> 00:17:30,633
What's wrong?
343
00:17:33,261 --> 00:17:36,097
My throat is so sore.
344
00:17:36,722 --> 00:17:39,809
I've just been fighting
this cold all week.
345
00:17:40,935 --> 00:17:42,228
Let me get the check.
346
00:17:42,520 --> 00:17:43,938
I'm so sorry.
347
00:17:44,522 --> 00:17:46,440
I had a really great time.
348
00:17:46,983 --> 00:17:48,985
Yeah. Me, too.
349
00:17:50,695 --> 00:17:53,114
While Charlotte was off
to her next engagement,
350
00:17:53,364 --> 00:17:56,534
Samantha was imagining
an engagement of her own.
351
00:18:04,208 --> 00:18:05,835
Excuse me, Jesus!
352
00:18:08,671 --> 00:18:10,506
Hi, I was just wondering,
353
00:18:10,673 --> 00:18:12,800
do you know who lives in that apartment
right there?
354
00:18:13,718 --> 00:18:15,595
Yes, yes.
355
00:18:16,762 --> 00:18:17,888
Very nice.
356
00:18:18,556 --> 00:18:21,267
Musician. His wife, a dancer.
357
00:18:21,601 --> 00:18:24,895
Really? And are they... nice looking?
358
00:18:25,730 --> 00:18:28,316
Yes, very nice.
359
00:18:29,734 --> 00:18:30,735
Very good.
360
00:18:30,818 --> 00:18:32,695
Okay, then. Carry on.
361
00:18:36,866 --> 00:18:38,909
Later that night,
Charlotte was returning
362
00:18:39,035 --> 00:18:42,747
from a second dinner of steamed mussels
and fries with bachelor number two,
363
00:18:42,913 --> 00:18:44,665
an art loving commodities broker.
364
00:18:44,749 --> 00:18:46,834
-I had a really great time.
-Me, too.
365
00:18:47,627 --> 00:18:48,544
-Yeah.
-Oh.
366
00:18:48,628 --> 00:18:50,379
Excuse me.
367
00:18:51,380 --> 00:18:53,132
So, can I call you?
368
00:18:53,591 --> 00:18:55,676
-Definitely.
-Okay.
369
00:19:03,392 --> 00:19:04,435
Charlotte?
370
00:19:05,519 --> 00:19:07,897
Eric, what are you doing here?
371
00:19:08,105 --> 00:19:09,899
I was just leaving you some chicken soup
372
00:19:10,441 --> 00:19:11,442
for your throat.
373
00:19:11,942 --> 00:19:13,152
But I see you've healed.
374
00:19:14,195 --> 00:19:15,404
Who is this guy?
375
00:19:15,488 --> 00:19:17,990
I'm the guy she had dinner with
before you.
376
00:19:19,325 --> 00:19:20,576
You-- You double-booked us?
377
00:19:20,660 --> 00:19:21,869
Hey, hey. Don't feel bad, bud.
378
00:19:21,952 --> 00:19:24,455
At least, you got the late shift.
I mean, you get to take her upstairs.
379
00:19:24,538 --> 00:19:25,581
I don't think so.
380
00:19:26,123 --> 00:19:28,626
Hey, you know what? Enjoy the soup.
381
00:19:29,627 --> 00:19:30,795
Hey, you going uptown?
382
00:19:31,837 --> 00:19:33,881
-Yeah, West Side.
-Wanna share a cab?
383
00:19:34,507 --> 00:19:35,508
Sure.
384
00:19:37,051 --> 00:19:39,553
From that moment on,
Charlotte developed a new pattern.
385
00:19:39,762 --> 00:19:42,973
She made it a rule never to take advice
from her friends again.
386
00:19:46,727 --> 00:19:48,312
Very late that night,
387
00:19:48,396 --> 00:19:52,233
Samantha decided to roll out
the welcome mat for her new neighbors.
388
00:19:58,614 --> 00:20:01,450
The musician and the dancer
turned out to be a middle-aged,
389
00:20:01,534 --> 00:20:03,035
Eastern European couple.
390
00:20:03,327 --> 00:20:05,996
He played in a polka band.
She was a dancer...
391
00:20:06,288 --> 00:20:07,623
once upon a time.
392
00:20:07,998 --> 00:20:09,250
Samantha?
393
00:20:11,585 --> 00:20:13,421
Would you mind keeping it down?
394
00:20:14,171 --> 00:20:15,881
I'm trying to get some sleep.
395
00:20:18,509 --> 00:20:20,261
Samantha broke
a pattern after all.
396
00:20:22,722 --> 00:20:25,266
She decided to move her bed
to the opposite wall.
397
00:20:26,976 --> 00:20:29,812
Later that week,
Kevin experienced a dream come true.
398
00:20:30,020 --> 00:20:32,982
He was made a full partner
of the law firm where he worked.
399
00:20:33,315 --> 00:20:35,317
He took Miranda out to celebrate.
400
00:20:36,986 --> 00:20:37,987
A toast.
401
00:20:38,279 --> 00:20:40,823
-To a very happy occasion.
-Oh, yeah.
402
00:20:40,906 --> 00:20:42,867
I'm falling all over myself with glee.
403
00:20:42,950 --> 00:20:45,411
Now I get to work 60 hours a week
for pretty much the same salary.
404
00:20:45,494 --> 00:20:46,662
I'm walking on air.
405
00:20:46,746 --> 00:20:48,914
Can't we enjoy your success
for one fucking second?
406
00:20:48,998 --> 00:20:51,542
You know, it just pisses me off you
don't get how much pressure I'm under.
407
00:20:51,625 --> 00:20:53,794
You really do live in
Never-Never land, don't you?
408
00:20:56,213 --> 00:20:57,173
By the way,
409
00:20:57,631 --> 00:20:59,800
if there's a difference between this
$100 bottle of champagne
410
00:20:59,884 --> 00:21:01,135
and the crap they sell for 29 bucks,
411
00:21:01,218 --> 00:21:03,763
it takes a more delicate palate
than mine to detect it. I don't know.
412
00:21:03,846 --> 00:21:06,932
Well, I like the champagne,
and the bread is fabulous.
413
00:21:07,057 --> 00:21:09,643
Oh my God, look at those flowers.
414
00:21:09,852 --> 00:21:10,936
Don't piss me off.
415
00:21:14,815 --> 00:21:15,941
Where are you going?
416
00:21:16,400 --> 00:21:17,943
Back to Never-Never land.
417
00:21:18,027 --> 00:21:21,530
And by the way,
never-never call me again.
418
00:21:21,697 --> 00:21:22,865
Have a nice day.
419
00:21:23,199 --> 00:21:24,241
What?
420
00:21:24,450 --> 00:21:27,828
Miranda broke her pattern
in a way that she had never expected.
421
00:21:28,162 --> 00:21:31,457
The angry guy had turned her
into a cock-eyed optimist.
422
00:21:32,041 --> 00:21:34,460
There could not have been
a more perfect moment
423
00:21:34,543 --> 00:21:37,171
for her to run into Skipper
for the first time since she dumped him.
424
00:21:37,254 --> 00:21:39,340
Hey, Skipper!
425
00:21:40,966 --> 00:21:42,051
Hey. Slow down a minute.
426
00:21:42,134 --> 00:21:44,220
Hey, you know what?
Don't tell me what to do, okay?
427
00:21:44,929 --> 00:21:47,640
I just wanted to say hello.
How've you been?
428
00:21:48,432 --> 00:21:49,558
How've I been?
429
00:21:49,767 --> 00:21:52,603
You know, you got a lot of nerve
talking to me like nothing happened,
430
00:21:52,686 --> 00:21:55,105
ever since you tossed me out
like bad milk.
431
00:21:55,189 --> 00:21:57,024
You know, I'll tell you how I've been.
Friggin' wonderful,
432
00:21:57,107 --> 00:21:58,901
now that I've got you out of my system.
433
00:21:59,235 --> 00:22:01,237
Can't I just talk to you for a minute?
434
00:22:01,737 --> 00:22:03,781
Could I buy you a beer or something?
435
00:22:04,114 --> 00:22:06,408
Miranda had never seen him
as angry as this before.
436
00:22:06,534 --> 00:22:08,828
Much to her horror, she was attracted.
437
00:22:09,036 --> 00:22:10,454
That's the thing about patterns.
438
00:22:10,788 --> 00:22:12,665
They don't just break
because you tell them to.
439
00:22:12,998 --> 00:22:14,458
Have you been working out?
440
00:22:15,417 --> 00:22:18,963
And a few nights later,
John and I went out for a movie.
441
00:22:19,255 --> 00:22:22,258
I refused to believe that
a passionate sexual connection
442
00:22:22,341 --> 00:22:25,594
could not be translated into a
meaningful friendship at the very least.
443
00:22:26,720 --> 00:22:28,055
So, did you like the movie?
444
00:22:28,222 --> 00:22:30,140
-Was it a comedy?
-No.
445
00:22:30,224 --> 00:22:31,392
I didn't think so.
446
00:22:33,310 --> 00:22:35,771
Isn't this the most amazing block?
447
00:22:36,021 --> 00:22:38,524
All these brownstones
are over 100 years old.
448
00:22:38,607 --> 00:22:40,234
You know,
it's like being in the New York
449
00:22:40,317 --> 00:22:42,862
of Edith Wharton and Henry James.
450
00:22:44,780 --> 00:22:48,492
Sometimes, I can't believe
how lucky I am to live right here.
451
00:22:53,247 --> 00:22:54,248
What?
452
00:22:55,040 --> 00:22:56,667
Your tits look really great
in that thing.
453
00:22:56,876 --> 00:23:00,296
At that moment,
I knew we only had two things in common.
454
00:23:01,005 --> 00:23:02,923
Listen, I'd invite you in, but--
455
00:23:03,007 --> 00:23:04,466
Oh, no, that's okay.
456
00:23:04,758 --> 00:23:06,510
I got to be up
really early tomorrow. So...
457
00:23:07,469 --> 00:23:08,554
Okay.
458
00:23:14,935 --> 00:23:15,936
I'll call you.
459
00:23:16,312 --> 00:23:17,313
Goodnight.
460
00:23:20,357 --> 00:23:22,693
I knew it was the last time
we'd ever see each other.
461
00:23:26,655 --> 00:23:27,781
And just like that,
462
00:23:27,865 --> 00:23:29,950
I was thrown right back
into my old pattern,
463
00:23:30,826 --> 00:23:34,371
Greasy Chinese, sleeping till noon,
464
00:23:34,747 --> 00:23:36,832
and feeling restless.