1 00:00:51,009 --> 00:00:53,804 I ran into my friend, Skipper, on the street the other day. 2 00:00:54,054 --> 00:00:57,474 He was bruised and frantic. He'd just broken up with another girl. 3 00:00:57,558 --> 00:00:59,518 I mean, I thought everything was going fine. 4 00:00:59,601 --> 00:01:01,562 That's when they tiptoe up and clobber you. 5 00:01:01,645 --> 00:01:03,730 Well, what did she say she thought was wrong? 6 00:01:04,815 --> 00:01:07,150 Skipper, you're a very sweet guy. 7 00:01:07,734 --> 00:01:09,403 I mean, this isn't about anything you did. 8 00:01:09,486 --> 00:01:12,656 It's just that we're in very different places right now. 9 00:01:12,739 --> 00:01:14,700 We want different things from life. 10 00:01:15,450 --> 00:01:17,536 I feel like I need to spend more time alone. 11 00:01:17,619 --> 00:01:19,746 So, actually, we want the same thing. 12 00:01:19,830 --> 00:01:21,915 We both wanna spend more time with you. 13 00:01:22,332 --> 00:01:25,294 Three months before that, it was a dental hygienist named Tiffany. 14 00:01:25,377 --> 00:01:27,671 The timing is wrong, that's all. 15 00:01:28,130 --> 00:01:30,257 You're one of the nicest guys I've ever known. 16 00:01:30,591 --> 00:01:34,052 It's just that I feel like I've reached a time in my life 17 00:01:34,219 --> 00:01:36,096 when I need to focus on my career. 18 00:01:36,305 --> 00:01:38,307 And I don't wanna feel guilty about that. 19 00:01:38,390 --> 00:01:40,183 But I don't want you to give up your career. 20 00:01:40,267 --> 00:01:42,811 I know. I know. You've been great. 21 00:01:43,103 --> 00:01:46,273 You really deserve someone who will appreciate you. 22 00:01:46,815 --> 00:01:49,735 I just don't feel like I have anything to give at the moment. 23 00:01:50,235 --> 00:01:53,113 And last year, it was Miranda. 24 00:01:53,363 --> 00:01:56,033 I feel like I need to spend more time alone. 25 00:01:57,284 --> 00:02:01,288 I've just reached a point in my life where I need to focus on my career. 26 00:02:02,039 --> 00:02:04,666 I just don't think that I have anything to give at the moment. 27 00:02:05,626 --> 00:02:07,336 Skipper, what else can I say? 28 00:02:07,794 --> 00:02:09,838 I have such horrible luck with women. 29 00:02:10,255 --> 00:02:12,507 I totally should've seen this coming, but of course, I didn't. 30 00:02:12,924 --> 00:02:16,803 Because they wait for you to get relaxed and get comfortable 31 00:02:16,887 --> 00:02:19,806 before they bring the ice pick down right between your eyes. 32 00:02:19,890 --> 00:02:20,974 Not all women, 33 00:02:21,058 --> 00:02:23,435 just the types of women you seem to be attracted to. 34 00:02:23,518 --> 00:02:26,104 Yeah. Over and over and over again. 35 00:02:26,563 --> 00:02:29,107 Well, those ladies don't know what they're missing, 36 00:02:29,191 --> 00:02:30,734 and missing and missing. 37 00:02:30,901 --> 00:02:32,736 Skipper's pattern was clear to both of us. 38 00:02:33,028 --> 00:02:35,989 He was a sweet guy who was perpetually attracted to women 39 00:02:36,073 --> 00:02:37,282 who were looking for jerks. 40 00:02:37,908 --> 00:02:39,951 Later that night, on a date across town, 41 00:02:40,035 --> 00:02:42,287 Miranda was repeating a pattern of her own. 42 00:02:42,371 --> 00:02:45,707 She had been dating a lawyer she met when they got into a big fight in court. 43 00:02:45,999 --> 00:02:50,128 A frequent guest on MSNBC, Kevin was not just argumentative, 44 00:02:50,253 --> 00:02:51,880 he was an anger professional. 45 00:02:52,172 --> 00:02:54,257 You know, I think I gotta revise my opinion 46 00:02:54,341 --> 00:02:57,469 that you gotta be an idiot to want to go out to a movie these days. 47 00:02:57,552 --> 00:03:01,431 I mean, it was worth the $19, plus $10 in snacks and water, 48 00:03:01,515 --> 00:03:04,851 just to hear that bus driver behind us explaining filmmaking to his wife. 49 00:03:04,935 --> 00:03:07,104 He certainly had some wonderful insights to share. 50 00:03:07,187 --> 00:03:09,898 But at least, on the bright side, it was an interesting movie, right? 51 00:03:09,981 --> 00:03:11,817 Oh, yeah, right. It was a real Citizen Kane. 52 00:03:11,900 --> 00:03:14,194 Well, I thought the actor who played Carlo was kind of charming. 53 00:03:14,277 --> 00:03:17,656 That moron looked like he walked into work before the anesthesia 54 00:03:17,739 --> 00:03:18,949 wore off from his lobotomy. 55 00:03:19,032 --> 00:03:21,284 All right, all right, I'll just get us a cab, okay? 56 00:03:21,743 --> 00:03:22,744 Taxi! 57 00:03:22,828 --> 00:03:24,830 You gotta face uptown to get a cab around here. 58 00:03:25,414 --> 00:03:27,541 I've caught plenty of cabs this way. 59 00:03:27,624 --> 00:03:29,918 Yeah, in Never-Never land, where people constantly confuse 60 00:03:30,001 --> 00:03:32,087 a complete lack of talent with charm. 61 00:03:33,797 --> 00:03:35,924 Come on, Gene Shalit, get in the damn cab. 62 00:03:37,050 --> 00:03:38,093 Come on. 63 00:03:39,803 --> 00:03:41,179 Get in, sore loser. 64 00:03:41,346 --> 00:03:42,806 Come on, in. 65 00:03:43,724 --> 00:03:45,600 -In, come on. -Jesus! 66 00:03:46,476 --> 00:03:49,479 Miranda hated how he ordered her around and told her what do, 67 00:03:49,855 --> 00:03:51,773 every place except one. 68 00:03:52,941 --> 00:03:54,234 Put your hands up over your head. 69 00:03:59,197 --> 00:04:00,282 Spread your legs. 70 00:04:11,710 --> 00:04:17,299 The weird thing is, when he tells me what to do in life, it drives me crazy. 71 00:04:17,382 --> 00:04:21,011 But when tells me what to do during sex, it really drives me crazy. 72 00:04:21,094 --> 00:04:22,345 -Oh. -It's totally hot! 73 00:04:22,929 --> 00:04:24,055 That looks like a good spot. 74 00:04:24,556 --> 00:04:26,141 Everybody, check for park poo. 75 00:04:26,391 --> 00:04:27,726 I mean, isn't that funny? 76 00:04:28,185 --> 00:04:31,062 That what I hate in life, I love in sex? 77 00:04:31,188 --> 00:04:34,858 So, how about if you limit your contact with him to just sex? 78 00:04:35,066 --> 00:04:37,319 Oh, that's a nice, healthy relationship. 79 00:04:37,569 --> 00:04:40,071 The thing is, I'm not ready yet, to throw in the towel. 80 00:04:40,155 --> 00:04:41,698 No, you're just ready to wrap it around his neck. 81 00:04:43,200 --> 00:04:46,703 He's going through a very stressful time waiting to make partner at his firm. 82 00:04:46,787 --> 00:04:49,706 When that finally works out, I think maybe he'll lighten up a bit. 83 00:04:49,873 --> 00:04:53,043 Or maybe you should face the fact that you're attracted to angry guys. 84 00:04:53,126 --> 00:04:55,712 -Deviled eggs? -Wait a second, hold the eggs! 85 00:04:55,796 --> 00:04:58,006 What about Skipper? He never got angry. 86 00:04:58,089 --> 00:04:59,841 Yeah. And you dumped him. Fits a pattern. 87 00:04:59,925 --> 00:05:01,176 I don't have a pattern. 88 00:05:01,259 --> 00:05:03,345 In math, randomness is considered a pattern. 89 00:05:03,428 --> 00:05:06,181 Yes, and I'm what they call a prime number. 90 00:05:06,681 --> 00:05:08,600 She's got a very obvious pattern, you know? 91 00:05:08,975 --> 00:05:11,228 I do? What? Tell me! 92 00:05:11,478 --> 00:05:14,356 You wait for a perfect guy to ask you on a perfect date-- 93 00:05:14,439 --> 00:05:17,901 And when he does, you project this huge fantasy on him, 94 00:05:17,984 --> 00:05:20,195 setting up these enormous expectations-- 95 00:05:20,278 --> 00:05:22,489 Which promptly blow up in your pretty little face. 96 00:05:22,572 --> 00:05:24,950 You put all your deviled eggs in one basket, so to speak. 97 00:05:25,367 --> 00:05:26,827 That's a horrible pattern. 98 00:05:26,993 --> 00:05:29,120 Well, spread it around a little more. 99 00:05:29,204 --> 00:05:32,624 Date a few guys at once and then you won't feel so disappointed. 100 00:05:32,707 --> 00:05:36,253 -Are you asking Charlotte to juggle? -It's all about multi-tasking. 101 00:05:36,628 --> 00:05:39,923 None of us can afford to fall into this "one man at a time" pattern. 102 00:05:40,006 --> 00:05:42,551 I mean, look at how much time you wasted with Big. 103 00:05:42,759 --> 00:05:44,344 Yeah, but Big was an aberration. 104 00:05:44,427 --> 00:05:46,429 Next time I meet a handsome, wealthy, 105 00:05:46,555 --> 00:05:48,139 and emotionally unavailable 43-year-old man, 106 00:05:48,223 --> 00:05:49,432 I'll know what to expect. 107 00:05:49,516 --> 00:05:50,433 Will you? 108 00:05:50,600 --> 00:05:52,894 Or will you just make the same mistake all over again? 109 00:05:53,520 --> 00:05:54,521 I wondered, 110 00:05:54,604 --> 00:05:57,399 were we all just victims of conditioned responses? 111 00:05:57,774 --> 00:06:00,861 Doomed to repeat the same unconscious relationship patterns? 112 00:06:01,319 --> 00:06:03,780 Were we all, in fact, just dating 113 00:06:04,114 --> 00:06:06,575 the same person over and over again? 114 00:06:06,908 --> 00:06:09,744 Well, I guess I have dated quite a few artists. 115 00:06:09,870 --> 00:06:12,247 But I don't think they were all the same person. 116 00:06:12,497 --> 00:06:16,751 Okay, yes. They were all narcissists with commitment phobias 117 00:06:16,835 --> 00:06:18,295 and substance abuse issues. 118 00:06:18,378 --> 00:06:22,340 But, in my opinion, the painters were very different from the sculptors. 119 00:06:23,341 --> 00:06:25,969 Handsome waspy assholes who treat me like shit. 120 00:06:26,177 --> 00:06:28,430 I only date girls with Sony Playstations. 121 00:06:28,555 --> 00:06:29,764 Or breasts. 122 00:06:32,183 --> 00:06:34,144 That night, Samantha became acquainted 123 00:06:34,227 --> 00:06:35,645 with the new neighbors next door. 124 00:06:37,772 --> 00:06:39,774 Though she had never met them face to face, 125 00:06:39,858 --> 00:06:41,359 she already knew them intimately. 126 00:06:44,279 --> 00:06:47,490 The idea that someone else was having great sex and flaunting it 127 00:06:47,574 --> 00:06:48,909 was more than she could bear. 128 00:06:49,492 --> 00:06:52,037 So she decided, if you can't join 'em, 129 00:06:53,413 --> 00:06:54,414 beat it. 130 00:06:57,500 --> 00:07:00,045 It all fit Samantha's pattern to a T. 131 00:07:01,046 --> 00:07:04,507 Having a wall between her and the person she was having sex with. 132 00:07:06,009 --> 00:07:08,303 After a few weeks of not seeing Big, 133 00:07:08,386 --> 00:07:11,765 I was beginning to fall into some familiar patterns of my own. 134 00:07:11,973 --> 00:07:14,559 Staying out till 3:00 a.m. and sleeping till noon, 135 00:07:14,643 --> 00:07:17,103 ordering takeout from the same greasy Chinese, 136 00:07:17,270 --> 00:07:21,358 and calling old friends who would always be there for me when I was feeling... 137 00:07:21,900 --> 00:07:22,901 restless. 138 00:07:25,236 --> 00:07:26,529 McFadden. 139 00:07:26,655 --> 00:07:28,114 Hey John, it's Carrie. 140 00:07:28,406 --> 00:07:31,368 Carrie, hey, how are you? Long time. 141 00:07:31,493 --> 00:07:35,205 Yeah, I know. Listen, I thought if you weren't doing anything, 142 00:07:35,372 --> 00:07:37,540 you might want to meet for a drink after work. 143 00:07:37,791 --> 00:07:39,292 Yeah. Sure, that would be great. 144 00:07:39,376 --> 00:07:41,378 How about six-ish? 145 00:07:41,461 --> 00:07:42,963 I could be there about 6:30. 146 00:07:43,046 --> 00:07:44,214 Perfect, I'll see you then. 147 00:07:49,427 --> 00:07:51,471 That evening, at 6:30 sharp, 148 00:07:54,599 --> 00:07:57,477 -Hey! You, too. -Hey. Wow, it's great to see you. 149 00:07:57,560 --> 00:07:58,436 Wow. 150 00:07:58,520 --> 00:08:01,189 Come on in. I was just gonna open up a bottle of red. 151 00:08:01,272 --> 00:08:02,899 Oh, red, yeah, beautiful. 152 00:08:03,692 --> 00:08:06,778 I just... I gotta be somewhere by 8:30. 153 00:08:07,529 --> 00:08:09,364 Oh, that's okay. I've got dinner plans at 8:00. 154 00:08:09,447 --> 00:08:10,532 Okay. 155 00:08:12,742 --> 00:08:13,743 Hm. 156 00:08:21,960 --> 00:08:25,380 John was as dependable a pal as a gal could ever hope for. 157 00:08:26,756 --> 00:08:29,175 Fun, comfortable and easy to be with. 158 00:08:29,634 --> 00:08:31,886 The kind of guy who you could shed all inhibitions 159 00:08:31,970 --> 00:08:33,680 and really be yourself around. 160 00:08:33,888 --> 00:08:36,599 No muss... no fuss. 161 00:08:37,183 --> 00:08:38,435 Phew. 162 00:08:41,354 --> 00:08:43,064 So how's the... 163 00:08:43,898 --> 00:08:45,859 -going? - Great. 164 00:08:46,609 --> 00:08:47,527 It's great. 165 00:08:47,986 --> 00:08:49,946 -How's work with you? -Never dull. 166 00:08:50,655 --> 00:08:51,740 Never dull. 167 00:08:52,782 --> 00:08:55,368 How's your younger sister doing? 168 00:08:55,535 --> 00:08:56,536 Brother. 169 00:08:58,038 --> 00:09:01,624 The one that moved to Phoenix? 170 00:09:02,042 --> 00:09:03,960 -Tallahassee. Yeah. -Right. 171 00:09:05,253 --> 00:09:07,130 So how's he doing down there? 172 00:09:07,338 --> 00:09:09,424 -He's doing great, thanks for asking. -Sure. 173 00:09:14,471 --> 00:09:16,139 And then I realized it. 174 00:09:16,514 --> 00:09:20,810 I didn't have a relationship pattern, I had a between-relationship pattern. 175 00:09:21,186 --> 00:09:23,980 I always went back to John after every devastating, 176 00:09:24,064 --> 00:09:25,940 soul-shattering, gut-wrenching break up. 177 00:09:26,399 --> 00:09:28,735 He was sweet, handsome, uncomplicated. 178 00:09:28,943 --> 00:09:31,446 A real shot in the arm for my sexual self-esteem. 179 00:09:31,529 --> 00:09:32,947 Thanks for the call, gorgeous. 180 00:09:36,743 --> 00:09:38,578 Sure put a cherry on my sundae. 181 00:09:39,537 --> 00:09:42,123 Why had I been keeping him on the bench all these years? 182 00:09:42,582 --> 00:09:46,169 Did I really believe a relationship had to be difficult in order to work? 183 00:09:48,004 --> 00:09:49,089 Hey. 184 00:09:49,756 --> 00:09:51,299 Do you want to have dinner Friday night? 185 00:09:51,800 --> 00:09:52,801 Dinner? 186 00:09:52,926 --> 00:09:54,511 Uh, yeah. 187 00:09:55,053 --> 00:09:57,180 Sure. I should check my schedule, but I think I can make it. 188 00:09:57,430 --> 00:09:58,389 Great. 189 00:09:58,556 --> 00:09:59,974 You want to say, like... 190 00:10:00,308 --> 00:10:01,392 eight o' clock? 191 00:10:01,643 --> 00:10:02,852 How about 8: 15? 192 00:10:03,061 --> 00:10:05,897 And just like that, I broke my pattern. 193 00:10:07,148 --> 00:10:09,943 Carrie, you can't date your fuck buddy. 194 00:10:10,026 --> 00:10:13,279 Say it a little louder. I don't think the old lady in the last row heard you. 195 00:10:13,363 --> 00:10:16,533 You're gonna take the only person in your life that's there purely for sex 196 00:10:16,616 --> 00:10:18,827 no strings attached, and turn him into a human being? 197 00:10:18,910 --> 00:10:19,911 Why? 198 00:10:20,411 --> 00:10:22,580 Excuse me, "fuck buddy"? 199 00:10:23,206 --> 00:10:24,874 What is a "fuck buddy"? 200 00:10:24,958 --> 00:10:27,252 -Oh, come on. 201 00:10:28,253 --> 00:10:31,172 A fuck buddy is a guy you probably dated once or twice, 202 00:10:31,256 --> 00:10:32,423 and it didn't really go anywhere, 203 00:10:32,507 --> 00:10:35,343 but the sex is so great, you sort of keep him on call. 204 00:10:35,468 --> 00:10:36,845 Hm, he's like "dial-a-dick." 205 00:10:37,053 --> 00:10:42,183 You mean you just call this guy up when you're, you know, horny? 206 00:10:42,267 --> 00:10:43,560 -Mm-hm. -Yes. 207 00:10:43,643 --> 00:10:45,061 And he just comes right over? 208 00:10:45,145 --> 00:10:47,856 Well, he's not a slave, sweetheart. He does have a life. 209 00:10:47,939 --> 00:10:49,774 But you don't really have to know about it. 210 00:10:49,858 --> 00:10:53,236 And you're generally guaranteed delivery within Manhattan in six hours or less. 211 00:10:53,653 --> 00:10:55,238 And you guys all have one? 212 00:10:55,488 --> 00:10:58,992 Well, mine moved to Chicago but now we have phone sex. 213 00:10:59,117 --> 00:11:00,618 What's he doing in Chicago? 214 00:11:00,743 --> 00:11:02,662 I have absolutely no idea. 215 00:11:03,621 --> 00:11:05,915 A few moments later, emboldened by our conversation, 216 00:11:05,999 --> 00:11:08,459 and high from too many tantric headstands, 217 00:11:08,793 --> 00:11:11,754 Charlotte asked a man out for the first time. 218 00:11:11,838 --> 00:11:13,381 Man, that class was tough. 219 00:11:13,715 --> 00:11:15,592 I never sweated so much in my entire life. 220 00:11:17,468 --> 00:11:19,429 Would you like to go out to dinner Friday night? 221 00:11:20,638 --> 00:11:21,639 Sure. 222 00:11:25,977 --> 00:11:26,978 I wondered, 223 00:11:27,228 --> 00:11:29,564 if Charlotte could break her pattern and start asking out 224 00:11:29,689 --> 00:11:32,942 every man in Manhattan, why couldn't I start having a deeper relationship 225 00:11:33,026 --> 00:11:34,777 with a man I have shallow sex with? 226 00:11:40,533 --> 00:11:42,076 Wow. 227 00:11:42,827 --> 00:11:44,746 You're all dressy. Yeah. 228 00:11:45,330 --> 00:11:46,956 Well, I guess. 229 00:11:48,082 --> 00:11:49,042 Thanks. 230 00:11:49,250 --> 00:11:52,212 The fact was, I wanted to tell him that he'd never actually seen me in clothes. 231 00:11:52,587 --> 00:11:54,756 Uh, so, do you want a glass of wine first, or... 232 00:11:54,839 --> 00:11:57,550 No, I'm fine, thanks. 233 00:12:00,720 --> 00:12:03,097 -Hey, wait, wait, wait. Wait. -Oh. 234 00:12:03,765 --> 00:12:06,184 -I made reservations. -Huh? 235 00:12:06,559 --> 00:12:08,728 -At a sushi restaurant. -Oh. 236 00:12:09,812 --> 00:12:12,398 Oh, cool. I see. 237 00:12:12,690 --> 00:12:14,817 No! I mean, God! 238 00:12:15,318 --> 00:12:17,362 I mean sushi. 239 00:12:18,112 --> 00:12:20,240 -Japanese food! -Oh! 240 00:12:20,323 --> 00:12:22,784 When you said dinner, you meant dinner. 241 00:12:22,909 --> 00:12:23,785 Yeah. 242 00:12:23,868 --> 00:12:25,787 Oh, no. It's just that, whenever we've had dinner, 243 00:12:25,912 --> 00:12:26,746 we've always, you know-- 244 00:12:26,829 --> 00:12:27,956 Yeah, I know. I know. 245 00:12:29,540 --> 00:12:32,418 All right. I'm gonna... I'm just gonna get my purse. 246 00:12:33,044 --> 00:12:36,172 Like most first dates, we were off to an awkward start. 247 00:12:45,348 --> 00:12:51,187 Um, the yellow tail sashimi, two pieces of salmon sushi, 248 00:12:51,271 --> 00:12:53,523 and a spicy tuna hand roll. 249 00:12:53,606 --> 00:12:55,066 Oh, do you like eel? 250 00:12:55,275 --> 00:12:56,567 Uh, no way. 251 00:12:56,651 --> 00:12:59,862 I'll have the chicken teriyaki, well done. 252 00:13:00,071 --> 00:13:02,657 No, the sushi's so amazing here. 253 00:13:02,740 --> 00:13:03,658 No, I just-- 254 00:13:03,783 --> 00:13:05,702 I can't deal with the raw stuff. Yeah, it just doesn't work. 255 00:13:05,785 --> 00:13:07,829 Well, why didn't you tell me? We could've gone some place else. 256 00:13:07,912 --> 00:13:10,540 No, don't worry about it. If I'm hungry, I'll grab a burger after. 257 00:13:10,832 --> 00:13:11,833 Okay. 258 00:13:13,084 --> 00:13:15,503 Oh, hey, listen, before I forget, 259 00:13:16,587 --> 00:13:18,089 this is for you. 260 00:13:18,673 --> 00:13:21,175 Oh! Thanks. What is it? 261 00:13:21,259 --> 00:13:25,471 Forty minutes free long distance, continental U.S., no strings attached. 262 00:13:25,722 --> 00:13:28,266 It's to promote our new 7-7-3 service, see? 263 00:13:28,349 --> 00:13:31,477 Seven days, seven hours, $3 a day. 264 00:13:32,186 --> 00:13:33,479 Well. Thank you. 265 00:13:33,563 --> 00:13:34,689 So you, like-- 266 00:13:34,772 --> 00:13:37,734 Think these gimmicks up? Sort of. I mean, officially, I sell time. 267 00:13:37,984 --> 00:13:40,945 But I get these incentive minutes which I can distribute at my own discretion. 268 00:13:41,154 --> 00:13:42,155 Oh. 269 00:13:42,405 --> 00:13:45,033 So, if I'm lucky, I might get a whole hour next time? 270 00:13:45,116 --> 00:13:46,534 I don't think so. But if you're 271 00:13:46,617 --> 00:13:48,369 currently an MCI customer and you switch, 272 00:13:48,453 --> 00:13:50,121 then you get two hours for free. Hm? 273 00:13:50,538 --> 00:13:51,748 I was kidding. 274 00:13:51,956 --> 00:13:53,833 Oh. Right, gotcha. 275 00:13:57,712 --> 00:14:00,757 So, maybe we should just order some sake? 276 00:14:01,174 --> 00:14:02,133 Oh, yeah, sure. 277 00:14:02,216 --> 00:14:03,885 Hey, sake to me! 278 00:14:07,472 --> 00:14:09,432 We went back to my place for a quickie. 279 00:14:10,850 --> 00:14:14,020 I needed to erase the stagnant memory of the past two hours. 280 00:14:14,354 --> 00:14:17,231 Was it really possible that someone so stimulating in bed 281 00:14:17,315 --> 00:14:19,025 could be so tedious in life? 282 00:14:30,536 --> 00:14:33,247 Meanwhile, Samantha was actually beginning to look forward 283 00:14:33,331 --> 00:14:34,957 to the company of her new neighbors. 284 00:14:36,000 --> 00:14:37,335 Every night, like clockwork, 285 00:14:37,418 --> 00:14:39,796 right after the end of the 11 o'clock news... 286 00:14:48,137 --> 00:14:51,099 Samantha relished her role as the invisible guest vocalist 287 00:14:51,182 --> 00:14:52,266 to an unseen band. 288 00:14:58,523 --> 00:15:00,900 Until one night, she wasn't so invisible. 289 00:15:19,210 --> 00:15:21,129 That Saturday, Miranda planned for us all 290 00:15:21,212 --> 00:15:22,922 to meet her latest fling for brunch. 291 00:15:23,214 --> 00:15:25,591 Apparently, he had flung himself elsewhere. 292 00:15:25,675 --> 00:15:27,510 He should be here any minute, really. 293 00:15:27,593 --> 00:15:29,720 Hey, don't worry about it. If it's just us, it's fine. 294 00:15:29,804 --> 00:15:31,931 It's not like we've got anywhere else to go. 295 00:15:32,181 --> 00:15:33,474 I do have a date tonight. 296 00:15:33,558 --> 00:15:35,351 -With whom? -That yoga guy. 297 00:15:35,643 --> 00:15:36,727 I asked him out. 298 00:15:36,894 --> 00:15:38,938 -Hm? -Wow, I'm impressed. 299 00:15:39,188 --> 00:15:42,358 You know, once I broke the ice with him, it was just like riding a bike. 300 00:15:42,817 --> 00:15:45,945 I have so many dates this week, that I just scheduled two in one night. 301 00:15:46,070 --> 00:15:48,322 -You double-booked? -Well, I had to. 302 00:15:48,406 --> 00:15:50,116 This one guy was going out of town for three weeks, 303 00:15:50,199 --> 00:15:51,659 and the other guy, I didn't wanna cancel. 304 00:15:51,742 --> 00:15:53,870 So, how do you conceive pulling this one off? 305 00:15:53,953 --> 00:15:56,998 Early dinner with bachelor one, late supper with bachelor two. 306 00:15:57,081 --> 00:15:59,792 My God, you're turning into a man. 307 00:15:59,876 --> 00:16:02,545 Apparently, Charlotte had done more than break a pattern. 308 00:16:02,628 --> 00:16:04,505 She had actually changed genders. 309 00:16:05,339 --> 00:16:08,176 I just don't know how I'm ever gonna eat two dinners in a row. 310 00:16:08,259 --> 00:16:11,220 And then, just like that, she was a woman again. 311 00:16:11,471 --> 00:16:12,472 Sorry, babe. 312 00:16:12,555 --> 00:16:16,267 The idiot who drove me here apparently passed his driving test in Bangladesh. 313 00:16:16,767 --> 00:16:19,520 I'm just happy to get off that fuckin' rickshaw in one piece. 314 00:16:19,604 --> 00:16:22,982 Kevin, this is Carrie, and Samantha and Charlotte. 315 00:16:23,065 --> 00:16:24,525 -This is Kevin. -Oh, it's nice to meet you. 316 00:16:24,609 --> 00:16:26,360 I have to go make a quick phone call, I'll be right back. 317 00:16:26,694 --> 00:16:28,321 Waitress! Draft beer here. 318 00:16:30,615 --> 00:16:31,741 He's cute. 319 00:16:31,824 --> 00:16:33,910 In a tightly wound sort of way. 320 00:16:33,993 --> 00:16:36,746 He's finding out on Tuesday whether he made partner. 321 00:16:36,913 --> 00:16:39,957 I'm keeping my fingers crossed that he'll unwind some after that. 322 00:16:44,962 --> 00:16:46,088 What are you doing? 323 00:16:46,339 --> 00:16:48,841 I just-- I just don't want him going off on the waitress. 324 00:16:50,593 --> 00:16:53,262 That evening, Charlotte set out to break her pattern. 325 00:16:53,387 --> 00:16:55,556 A casual meal with Eric from yoga, 326 00:16:55,640 --> 00:16:58,893 where they discovered a mutual love for long drives up Maine coasts, 327 00:16:58,976 --> 00:17:00,937 and reruns of "Nanny and the Professor". 328 00:17:01,020 --> 00:17:03,231 -She was psychic, wasn't she? -Absolutely. 329 00:17:03,314 --> 00:17:05,858 No, but it was very subtle, very sophisticated. 330 00:17:05,942 --> 00:17:08,528 I don't even think that kids today would understand it. 331 00:17:08,986 --> 00:17:09,904 No. 332 00:17:10,154 --> 00:17:11,531 I'll tell you something, when I have kids, 333 00:17:11,781 --> 00:17:13,699 I'm gonna be a total Nazi with the remote. 334 00:17:13,783 --> 00:17:14,951 I want them to read. 335 00:17:15,034 --> 00:17:16,410 How many kids do you want to have? 336 00:17:16,827 --> 00:17:18,412 Two, one of each. 337 00:17:18,829 --> 00:17:20,039 Sounds perfect. 338 00:17:20,790 --> 00:17:22,875 Just as Charlotte began to swim in visions 339 00:17:22,959 --> 00:17:24,919 of family summers in Kennebunkport, 340 00:17:25,211 --> 00:17:27,380 she realized she was late for the second shift. 341 00:17:27,547 --> 00:17:28,548 Oh, my God. 342 00:17:29,632 --> 00:17:30,633 What's wrong? 343 00:17:33,261 --> 00:17:36,097 My throat is so sore. 344 00:17:36,722 --> 00:17:39,809 I've just been fighting this cold all week. 345 00:17:40,935 --> 00:17:42,228 Let me get the check. 346 00:17:42,520 --> 00:17:43,938 I'm so sorry. 347 00:17:44,522 --> 00:17:46,440 I had a really great time. 348 00:17:46,983 --> 00:17:48,985 Yeah. Me, too. 349 00:17:50,695 --> 00:17:53,114 While Charlotte was off to her next engagement, 350 00:17:53,364 --> 00:17:56,534 Samantha was imagining an engagement of her own. 351 00:18:04,208 --> 00:18:05,835 Excuse me, Jesus! 352 00:18:08,671 --> 00:18:10,506 Hi, I was just wondering, 353 00:18:10,673 --> 00:18:12,800 do you know who lives in that apartment right there? 354 00:18:13,718 --> 00:18:15,595 Yes, yes. 355 00:18:16,762 --> 00:18:17,888 Very nice. 356 00:18:18,556 --> 00:18:21,267 Musician. His wife, a dancer. 357 00:18:21,601 --> 00:18:24,895 Really? And are they... nice looking? 358 00:18:25,730 --> 00:18:28,316 Yes, very nice. 359 00:18:29,734 --> 00:18:30,735 Very good. 360 00:18:30,818 --> 00:18:32,695 Okay, then. Carry on. 361 00:18:36,866 --> 00:18:38,909 Later that night, Charlotte was returning 362 00:18:39,035 --> 00:18:42,747 from a second dinner of steamed mussels and fries with bachelor number two, 363 00:18:42,913 --> 00:18:44,665 an art loving commodities broker. 364 00:18:44,749 --> 00:18:46,834 -I had a really great time. -Me, too. 365 00:18:47,627 --> 00:18:48,544 -Yeah. -Oh. 366 00:18:48,628 --> 00:18:50,379 Excuse me. 367 00:18:51,380 --> 00:18:53,132 So, can I call you? 368 00:18:53,591 --> 00:18:55,676 -Definitely. -Okay. 369 00:19:03,392 --> 00:19:04,435 Charlotte? 370 00:19:05,519 --> 00:19:07,897 Eric, what are you doing here? 371 00:19:08,105 --> 00:19:09,899 I was just leaving you some chicken soup 372 00:19:10,441 --> 00:19:11,442 for your throat. 373 00:19:11,942 --> 00:19:13,152 But I see you've healed. 374 00:19:14,195 --> 00:19:15,404 Who is this guy? 375 00:19:15,488 --> 00:19:17,990 I'm the guy she had dinner with before you. 376 00:19:19,325 --> 00:19:20,576 You-- You double-booked us? 377 00:19:20,660 --> 00:19:21,869 Hey, hey. Don't feel bad, bud. 378 00:19:21,952 --> 00:19:24,455 At least, you got the late shift. I mean, you get to take her upstairs. 379 00:19:24,538 --> 00:19:25,581 I don't think so. 380 00:19:26,123 --> 00:19:28,626 Hey, you know what? Enjoy the soup. 381 00:19:29,627 --> 00:19:30,795 Hey, you going uptown? 382 00:19:31,837 --> 00:19:33,881 -Yeah, West Side. -Wanna share a cab? 383 00:19:34,507 --> 00:19:35,508 Sure. 384 00:19:37,051 --> 00:19:39,553 From that moment on, Charlotte developed a new pattern. 385 00:19:39,762 --> 00:19:42,973 She made it a rule never to take advice from her friends again. 386 00:19:46,727 --> 00:19:48,312 Very late that night, 387 00:19:48,396 --> 00:19:52,233 Samantha decided to roll out the welcome mat for her new neighbors. 388 00:19:58,614 --> 00:20:01,450 The musician and the dancer turned out to be a middle-aged, 389 00:20:01,534 --> 00:20:03,035 Eastern European couple. 390 00:20:03,327 --> 00:20:05,996 He played in a polka band. She was a dancer... 391 00:20:06,288 --> 00:20:07,623 once upon a time. 392 00:20:07,998 --> 00:20:09,250 Samantha? 393 00:20:11,585 --> 00:20:13,421 Would you mind keeping it down? 394 00:20:14,171 --> 00:20:15,881 I'm trying to get some sleep. 395 00:20:18,509 --> 00:20:20,261 Samantha broke a pattern after all. 396 00:20:22,722 --> 00:20:25,266 She decided to move her bed to the opposite wall. 397 00:20:26,976 --> 00:20:29,812 Later that week, Kevin experienced a dream come true. 398 00:20:30,020 --> 00:20:32,982 He was made a full partner of the law firm where he worked. 399 00:20:33,315 --> 00:20:35,317 He took Miranda out to celebrate. 400 00:20:36,986 --> 00:20:37,987 A toast. 401 00:20:38,279 --> 00:20:40,823 -To a very happy occasion. -Oh, yeah. 402 00:20:40,906 --> 00:20:42,867 I'm falling all over myself with glee. 403 00:20:42,950 --> 00:20:45,411 Now I get to work 60 hours a week for pretty much the same salary. 404 00:20:45,494 --> 00:20:46,662 I'm walking on air. 405 00:20:46,746 --> 00:20:48,914 Can't we enjoy your success for one fucking second? 406 00:20:48,998 --> 00:20:51,542 You know, it just pisses me off you don't get how much pressure I'm under. 407 00:20:51,625 --> 00:20:53,794 You really do live in Never-Never land, don't you? 408 00:20:56,213 --> 00:20:57,173 By the way, 409 00:20:57,631 --> 00:20:59,800 if there's a difference between this $100 bottle of champagne 410 00:20:59,884 --> 00:21:01,135 and the crap they sell for 29 bucks, 411 00:21:01,218 --> 00:21:03,763 it takes a more delicate palate than mine to detect it. I don't know. 412 00:21:03,846 --> 00:21:06,932 Well, I like the champagne, and the bread is fabulous. 413 00:21:07,057 --> 00:21:09,643 Oh my God, look at those flowers. 414 00:21:09,852 --> 00:21:10,936 Don't piss me off. 415 00:21:14,815 --> 00:21:15,941 Where are you going? 416 00:21:16,400 --> 00:21:17,943 Back to Never-Never land. 417 00:21:18,027 --> 00:21:21,530 And by the way, never-never call me again. 418 00:21:21,697 --> 00:21:22,865 Have a nice day. 419 00:21:23,199 --> 00:21:24,241 What? 420 00:21:24,450 --> 00:21:27,828 Miranda broke her pattern in a way that she had never expected. 421 00:21:28,162 --> 00:21:31,457 The angry guy had turned her into a cock-eyed optimist. 422 00:21:32,041 --> 00:21:34,460 There could not have been a more perfect moment 423 00:21:34,543 --> 00:21:37,171 for her to run into Skipper for the first time since she dumped him. 424 00:21:37,254 --> 00:21:39,340 Hey, Skipper! 425 00:21:40,966 --> 00:21:42,051 Hey. Slow down a minute. 426 00:21:42,134 --> 00:21:44,220 Hey, you know what? Don't tell me what to do, okay? 427 00:21:44,929 --> 00:21:47,640 I just wanted to say hello. How've you been? 428 00:21:48,432 --> 00:21:49,558 How've I been? 429 00:21:49,767 --> 00:21:52,603 You know, you got a lot of nerve talking to me like nothing happened, 430 00:21:52,686 --> 00:21:55,105 ever since you tossed me out like bad milk. 431 00:21:55,189 --> 00:21:57,024 You know, I'll tell you how I've been. Friggin' wonderful, 432 00:21:57,107 --> 00:21:58,901 now that I've got you out of my system. 433 00:21:59,235 --> 00:22:01,237 Can't I just talk to you for a minute? 434 00:22:01,737 --> 00:22:03,781 Could I buy you a beer or something? 435 00:22:04,114 --> 00:22:06,408 Miranda had never seen him as angry as this before. 436 00:22:06,534 --> 00:22:08,828 Much to her horror, she was attracted. 437 00:22:09,036 --> 00:22:10,454 That's the thing about patterns. 438 00:22:10,788 --> 00:22:12,665 They don't just break because you tell them to. 439 00:22:12,998 --> 00:22:14,458 Have you been working out? 440 00:22:15,417 --> 00:22:18,963 And a few nights later, John and I went out for a movie. 441 00:22:19,255 --> 00:22:22,258 I refused to believe that a passionate sexual connection 442 00:22:22,341 --> 00:22:25,594 could not be translated into a meaningful friendship at the very least. 443 00:22:26,720 --> 00:22:28,055 So, did you like the movie? 444 00:22:28,222 --> 00:22:30,140 -Was it a comedy? -No. 445 00:22:30,224 --> 00:22:31,392 I didn't think so. 446 00:22:33,310 --> 00:22:35,771 Isn't this the most amazing block? 447 00:22:36,021 --> 00:22:38,524 All these brownstones are over 100 years old. 448 00:22:38,607 --> 00:22:40,234 You know, it's like being in the New York 449 00:22:40,317 --> 00:22:42,862 of Edith Wharton and Henry James. 450 00:22:44,780 --> 00:22:48,492 Sometimes, I can't believe how lucky I am to live right here. 451 00:22:53,247 --> 00:22:54,248 What? 452 00:22:55,040 --> 00:22:56,667 Your tits look really great in that thing. 453 00:22:56,876 --> 00:23:00,296 At that moment, I knew we only had two things in common. 454 00:23:01,005 --> 00:23:02,923 Listen, I'd invite you in, but-- 455 00:23:03,007 --> 00:23:04,466 Oh, no, that's okay. 456 00:23:04,758 --> 00:23:06,510 I got to be up really early tomorrow. So... 457 00:23:07,469 --> 00:23:08,554 Okay. 458 00:23:14,935 --> 00:23:15,936 I'll call you. 459 00:23:16,312 --> 00:23:17,313 Goodnight. 460 00:23:20,357 --> 00:23:22,693 I knew it was the last time we'd ever see each other. 461 00:23:26,655 --> 00:23:27,781 And just like that, 462 00:23:27,865 --> 00:23:29,950 I was thrown right back into my old pattern, 463 00:23:30,826 --> 00:23:34,371 Greasy Chinese, sleeping till noon, 464 00:23:34,747 --> 00:23:36,832 and feeling restless.