1
00:00:48,966 --> 00:00:52,761
<i>When it gets cold outside,
New Yorkers head inside,</i>

2
00:00:52,844 --> 00:00:55,472
<i>and look for ways to generate heat.</i>

3
00:00:55,597 --> 00:00:59,017
Hey.
Watch those hands, mister.

4
00:00:59,101 --> 00:01:02,187
They are cold, and you are warm, so...

5
00:01:02,563 --> 00:01:05,148
- People are looking.
-No one is looking.

6
00:01:06,149 --> 00:01:07,609
Petrovsky.

7
00:01:08,193 --> 00:01:09,486
Hey, hi.

8
00:01:10,195 --> 00:01:11,655
Seated at the star table, I see.

9
00:01:11,905 --> 00:01:13,198
Where else would I be?

10
00:01:13,949 --> 00:01:15,576
-Come and join us.
-No, we wouldn't wanna...

11
00:01:15,659 --> 00:01:18,829
-Yes, come.
-You saved our lives.

12
00:01:18,912 --> 00:01:22,082
Ten thousand restaurants
in New York and everyone's at Pastis.

13
00:01:22,332 --> 00:01:23,542
Introductions.

14
00:01:23,750 --> 00:01:25,669
This is John Paul Sandal,

15
00:01:25,752 --> 00:01:28,630
-the most fantastic painter in New York.
-Hi.

16
00:01:28,714 --> 00:01:30,757
-I'm not paying for lunch.

17
00:01:31,466 --> 00:01:33,594
-You know my assistant Lee.
-Yes, hi.

18
00:01:33,760 --> 00:01:37,431
Audra Clark, she's the editor of
<i>Artlife</i> magazine.

19
00:01:37,889 --> 00:01:39,516
-Carrie Bradshaw.
-Hi.

20
00:01:39,600 --> 00:01:42,811
Handsome Lee has just informed us
of your upcoming show in Paris.

21
00:01:42,894 --> 00:01:43,854
Congratulations.

22
00:01:44,062 --> 00:01:48,483
Yeah, right, a solo exhibit at the
Galerie Nationale du Jeu de Paume.

23
00:01:48,567 --> 00:01:49,943
Just another day.

24
00:01:50,319 --> 00:01:51,862
You are so full of shit.

25
00:01:52,779 --> 00:01:53,947
I never said I wasn't.

26
00:01:54,031 --> 00:01:57,534
It's your first new exhibit in what,
four years?

27
00:01:57,618 --> 00:01:58,452
Six.

28
00:01:58,535 --> 00:02:02,039
Well, the world is waiting with breath
that is baited.

29
00:02:02,331 --> 00:02:04,124
We need menus and a wine list.

30
00:02:04,541 --> 00:02:05,834
So, how are they?

31
00:02:05,917 --> 00:02:07,544
The oysters are very good.

32
00:02:07,628 --> 00:02:09,046
No, his pieces.

33
00:02:09,421 --> 00:02:13,342
Oh, um, I don't know.
I haven't seen them yet.

34
00:02:13,508 --> 00:02:16,303
-Are you an artist as well?
-No, I'm a writer.

35
00:02:16,386 --> 00:02:17,346
Novels?

36
00:02:18,055 --> 00:02:20,932
No, I write a column for a newspaper.

37
00:02:21,058 --> 00:02:23,352
<i>-The Times?
-The New York Star.</i>

38
00:02:23,560 --> 00:02:28,106
It's very good column
about women, men, and sex.

39
00:02:28,565 --> 00:02:30,609
Very smart, and very funny.

40
00:02:31,109 --> 00:02:32,152
I'm sure.

41
00:02:32,402 --> 00:02:34,404
You're not sure, you're snide.

42
00:02:36,198 --> 00:02:38,825
-May I borrow your newspaper?
-No, no, what are you... Oh.

43
00:02:38,909 --> 00:02:39,951
Let's see.

44
00:02:40,911 --> 00:02:46,958
"It's my belief that the last time
anyone actually enjoyed the 69 position

45
00:02:47,042 --> 00:02:48,710
was in 1969."

46
00:02:51,338 --> 00:02:52,964
I think it's funny.

47
00:02:54,716 --> 00:02:58,053
That wasn't one of my smartest ones.

48
00:03:02,015 --> 00:03:04,851
<i>And further uptown,
Charlotte didn't mind the cold.</i>

49
00:03:04,935 --> 00:03:07,604
<i>She had a new puppy love
to keep her warm.</i>

50
00:03:07,729 --> 00:03:10,107
That is the most
precious little thing.

51
00:03:10,190 --> 00:03:11,900
-Thank you.
-What's her name?

52
00:03:11,983 --> 00:03:13,944
-Elizabeth Taylor.
-Oh!

53
00:03:15,696 --> 00:03:18,407
That is the fourth person
to stop and gush.

54
00:03:18,490 --> 00:03:20,492
I swear that dog's getting
cruised more than me,

55
00:03:20,575 --> 00:03:22,285
and we're on the corner of gay and gay.

56
00:03:22,452 --> 00:03:25,914
She loves the attention, doesn't she?
Look how she prances along.

57
00:03:25,997 --> 00:03:28,250
-Do you see her prancing?
-Yes, she's very prancy.

58
00:03:28,375 --> 00:03:31,628
She was a show dog, you know.
She even competed at Westminster.

59
00:03:31,712 --> 00:03:32,838
Did she ever win anything?

60
00:03:32,921 --> 00:03:35,590
Well, no, but I think that was only
because her last owner

61
00:03:35,674 --> 00:03:37,050
wasn't very supportive.

62
00:03:37,467 --> 00:03:39,428
I think she misses the competition.

63
00:03:39,511 --> 00:03:42,055
-See how she's showing off.
-She's a freaking attention whore.

64
00:03:42,139 --> 00:03:43,849
-Cute dog.
-Thank you.

65
00:03:44,141 --> 00:03:46,101
I'm thinking of re-entering her.

66
00:03:46,184 --> 00:03:48,311
I think with my love
and a little encouragement,

67
00:03:48,395 --> 00:03:50,147
she could actually win.
What do you think?

68
00:03:50,272 --> 00:03:51,773
What the hell, do it.

69
00:03:51,857 --> 00:03:53,817
Nobody puts baby in the corner.

70
00:03:55,193 --> 00:03:57,112
<i>Dirty Dancing,</i> hello?

71
00:03:57,863 --> 00:04:02,284
<i>And over in Brooklyn,
someone was not feeling so prancy.</i>

72
00:04:04,953 --> 00:04:06,121
-Hey.

73
00:04:06,955 --> 00:04:08,749
Man, your face is freezing.

74
00:04:08,832 --> 00:04:10,959
I had to walk all the way
from the subway in these heels.

75
00:04:11,042 --> 00:04:12,502
My feet are killing me.

76
00:04:12,586 --> 00:04:14,963
Why didn't you just carry 'em and wear
sneakers like everyone else?

77
00:04:15,046 --> 00:04:16,006
Stop.

78
00:04:16,089 --> 00:04:19,009
You can take me out of Manhattan,
but you can't take me out of my shoes.

79
00:04:19,384 --> 00:04:21,344
Then stop complaining about them.

80
00:04:21,428 --> 00:04:23,889
You're right. I have much bigger things
to complain about.

81
00:04:23,972 --> 00:04:26,433
Did you get a chance to install
my DSL line today?

82
00:04:26,641 --> 00:04:28,477
I was putting up sheetrock
in Brady's room.

83
00:04:28,560 --> 00:04:31,229
Steve, you know I can't live
without internet access.

84
00:04:31,313 --> 00:04:33,482
You want your kid to live without walls?

85
00:04:33,565 --> 00:04:35,567
Here. This ought to cheer you up.

86
00:04:35,650 --> 00:04:37,652
The Pony Express finally got
our address right.

87
00:04:37,736 --> 00:04:39,946
-We have mail?
-Yeah.

88
00:04:40,030 --> 00:04:41,531
My <i>Tattle Tale</i> came.

89
00:04:41,823 --> 00:04:44,117
Finally, a connection to the real world.

90
00:04:44,201 --> 00:04:46,578
I can't believe that you read that crap.

91
00:04:46,661 --> 00:04:48,747
I love it, it's my thing. Let it go.

92
00:04:50,290 --> 00:04:53,960
-Oh, Magda and Brady--
-I'm reading this, you no longer exist.

93
00:04:55,879 --> 00:04:59,132
<i>That night, over at the only
restaurant that seemed to exist...</i>

94
00:04:59,466 --> 00:05:02,010
Oh, there's Samantha's boyfriend, Smith.

95
00:05:02,177 --> 00:05:04,721
-Oh, where?
-Star table, let's say hello.

96
00:05:04,805 --> 00:05:05,847
I'm nervous.

97
00:05:05,931 --> 00:05:08,767
He's so unbelievably hot
in that Gus Van Sant movie.

98
00:05:10,560 --> 00:05:14,147
But can he pull off
a fuchsia Ozwald Boateng shirt?

99
00:05:15,232 --> 00:05:16,775
Hi, sorry to interrupt.

100
00:05:17,067 --> 00:05:19,069
We've met before.
We're friends of Samantha's.

101
00:05:19,152 --> 00:05:21,321
I hear she's a wonderful woman.

102
00:05:21,822 --> 00:05:25,242
Oh, my God, that's a good look for you.

103
00:05:25,325 --> 00:05:26,827
It's very Jefferson Starship.

104
00:05:26,952 --> 00:05:31,081
Well, I decided to turn a little
hair loss into a lot of hair gain.

105
00:05:31,164 --> 00:05:32,999
Oh, you're getting wiggy with it.

106
00:05:33,083 --> 00:05:34,918
Come on.
Jam in here right next to me.

107
00:05:35,085 --> 00:05:37,796
Oh, we don't wanna disturb.

108
00:05:37,879 --> 00:05:39,923
Are you kidding?
Any friend of Samantha's.

109
00:05:40,006 --> 00:05:40,924
Okay.

110
00:05:41,508 --> 00:05:44,094
This is my boyfriend Marcus.
Marcus, Smith Jerrod.

111
00:05:44,594 --> 00:05:46,096
Oh, whatever you're drinking,
looks yummy.

112
00:05:46,179 --> 00:05:49,391
Smith Jerrod. Gah... All right.

113
00:05:49,474 --> 00:05:50,767
How you doing, boss?

114
00:05:50,934 --> 00:05:53,103
Dude, my girl loves you.

115
00:05:53,478 --> 00:05:56,189
-You gotta let me get a picture.
-Only if you get my friends here.

116
00:05:56,273 --> 00:05:57,232
All right.

117
00:05:59,609 --> 00:06:04,614
I heard that Aleksandr Petrovsky
is having a solo show in Paris.

118
00:06:05,365 --> 00:06:07,158
Don't believe everything you hear.

119
00:06:07,242 --> 00:06:09,536
It's exciting, tell me about your show.

120
00:06:10,412 --> 00:06:12,873
Why would I want to talk about my work

121
00:06:13,790 --> 00:06:15,917
when I have you in bed with me?

122
00:06:17,669 --> 00:06:20,839
Because I want to know about it,
'cause it's important to you.

123
00:06:21,882 --> 00:06:23,550
This is what's important to me.

124
00:06:23,633 --> 00:06:25,218
Hmm.

125
00:06:27,596 --> 00:06:30,140
-I'm serious, come on.
-So am I.

126
00:06:30,557 --> 00:06:31,850
Very serious.

127
00:06:32,726 --> 00:06:37,480
I just... I wanna know more about
what you do.

128
00:06:37,898 --> 00:06:40,191
If for no other reason,
than I would like to avoid

129
00:06:40,275 --> 00:06:42,027
having this face in restaurants.

130
00:06:45,739 --> 00:06:50,660
I prefer keeping my work
and my private life separate.

131
00:06:51,119 --> 00:06:53,413
All this art talk,
it's so fucking boring.

132
00:06:54,080 --> 00:06:56,166
It wouldn't be to me.

133
00:06:56,249 --> 00:06:57,834
Then you're an exception to the rule.

134
00:06:58,752 --> 00:07:00,086
Well...

135
00:07:00,211 --> 00:07:04,633
then if you're not going to tell me
about the Gallery National de blah blah,

136
00:07:04,716 --> 00:07:07,302
then I need to get serious
about my busy day.

137
00:07:07,385 --> 00:07:08,637
Oh, don't go.

138
00:07:08,970 --> 00:07:13,725
-I have many, many...
-Oh, schedule. You're so New York.

139
00:07:14,059 --> 00:07:17,687
Stay here, do nothing, get in trouble.

140
00:07:17,771 --> 00:07:20,190
-Be spontaneous.

141
00:07:21,358 --> 00:07:23,902
But I'm meeting people for things.

142
00:07:24,444 --> 00:07:28,907
It's cold out there.
Stay here where it's warm.

143
00:07:32,369 --> 00:07:35,121
Samantha, I don't know
how to tell you this,

144
00:07:35,205 --> 00:07:38,583
but I was reading my <i>Tattle Tale</i>
and there's a picture of Smith.

145
00:07:38,667 --> 00:07:41,670
Miranda, what in the world are you doing
reading something like that?

146
00:07:41,753 --> 00:07:44,881
-I love it, it's my thing. Let it go.
-Oh, Smith is always in that rag.

147
00:07:44,965 --> 00:07:48,468
Yeah, but this time, he's gay.

148
00:07:49,260 --> 00:07:52,931
Oh, "Boysss Night Out."

149
00:07:53,014 --> 00:07:55,850
"Smith Jerrod cozies up
to Broadway dancer,

150
00:07:55,934 --> 00:07:59,771
Marcus Adant, and unidentified
older gay gentleman."

151
00:07:59,854 --> 00:08:00,981
Oh, poor Stanford.

152
00:08:01,189 --> 00:08:03,566
-Smith is not gay.
-Of course not.

153
00:08:04,025 --> 00:08:05,777
So, this makes you his beard.

154
00:08:06,069 --> 00:08:09,489
-I'm a beard in a wig.
- You're not upset?

155
00:08:09,698 --> 00:08:13,535
Oh, please, after the big C,
you don't sweat the small stuff.

156
00:08:13,910 --> 00:08:18,081
And besides, once the gay rumors start,
it means you're really a star.

157
00:08:22,419 --> 00:08:24,546
-Hello.
-Hi, sweetie, it's me.

158
00:08:24,629 --> 00:08:26,256
Carrie, where are you?

159
00:08:26,339 --> 00:08:29,217
Oh, bad news,
I don't think I'm gonna make it.

160
00:08:29,467 --> 00:08:30,885
You can't come? Are you okay?

161
00:08:31,136 --> 00:08:32,637
<i>No, I'm fine.
I'm just, you know,</i>

162
00:08:32,721 --> 00:08:36,516
I'm just all the way downtown
with the Russian and it's very cold out.

163
00:08:37,017 --> 00:08:39,144
She's still downtown and it's too cold.

164
00:08:39,686 --> 00:08:42,188
Well, you know,
we haven't seen you in forever and...

165
00:08:42,272 --> 00:08:43,481
Oh, I have news.

166
00:08:43,982 --> 00:08:47,610
Elizabeth Taylor is going to be
in a dog show.

167
00:08:50,030 --> 00:08:53,867
-My Elizabeth Taylor.
-Oh. Congratulations.

168
00:08:54,743 --> 00:08:58,121
And Miranda wants to really talk to you.
And Smith is gay.

169
00:08:59,039 --> 00:09:00,457
What do you mean you're not coming?

170
00:09:00,665 --> 00:09:01,499
Smith is gay?

171
00:09:01,750 --> 00:09:04,335
Don't try to change the subject.
I came in all the way in from Brooklyn.

172
00:09:04,419 --> 00:09:05,545
Oh, who are you kidding.

173
00:09:05,628 --> 00:09:08,006
You'd use any excuse
to come in the city.

174
00:09:08,173 --> 00:09:10,008
You owe me a trip to Brooklyn.

175
00:09:11,217 --> 00:09:13,928
Carrie, we're fine. Everything's fine.

176
00:09:14,012 --> 00:09:15,513
Smith is not gay.

177
00:09:15,638 --> 00:09:19,476
It's too cold to leave the house.
You stay downtown with your hot man.

178
00:09:19,559 --> 00:09:20,685
Okay.

179
00:09:28,068 --> 00:09:29,152
Ah.

180
00:09:29,444 --> 00:09:33,740
<i>Which is exactly what I did.
For the next four days.</i>

181
00:09:33,865 --> 00:09:34,699
Oh, my.

182
00:09:41,831 --> 00:09:44,084
<i>With my column tragically overdue,</i>

183
00:09:44,167 --> 00:09:46,878
<i>I finally left the Russian's
warm apartment.</i>

184
00:09:46,961 --> 00:09:48,963
Oh, good God.

185
00:09:51,007 --> 00:09:53,176
<i>And came home to the tropics.</i>

186
00:09:57,639 --> 00:10:00,934
<i>When you've been spending
all your time in your new world,</i>

187
00:10:01,101 --> 00:10:03,728
<i>it's easy to forget that there might be
people trying to reach you</i>

188
00:10:03,812 --> 00:10:05,188
<i>from your old world.</i>

189
00:10:05,688 --> 00:10:07,607
<i>Hey, kid, how's it going?</i>

190
00:10:08,024 --> 00:10:09,901
<i>We just put our new Cabernet to bed.</i>

191
00:10:10,026 --> 00:10:11,402
<i>Made me think of you.</i>

192
00:10:12,821 --> 00:10:13,905
<i>Give me a call.</i>

193
00:10:14,823 --> 00:10:16,658
<i>Saturday, 10:00 p.m.</i>

194
00:10:17,575 --> 00:10:19,536
<i>Playing hard to get, huh?</i>

195
00:10:19,953 --> 00:10:22,497
<i>Called your cell,
but I think I copied the number wrong.</i>

196
00:10:22,747 --> 00:10:25,333
<i>Unless you're a ticked off guy
named Paco.</i>

197
00:10:25,416 --> 00:10:28,044
<i>Hey, I wanna talk to you, call me.</i>

198
00:10:28,503 --> 00:10:30,588
<i>Monday, 2:00 p.m.</i>

199
00:10:31,172 --> 00:10:35,135
<i>Carrie, it's me. Again.</i>

200
00:10:35,468 --> 00:10:38,638
<i>Listen, uh, did I do something
to tick you off?</i>

201
00:10:39,222 --> 00:10:42,600
<i>If I did,
call me and I'll apologize. Okay?</i>

202
00:10:44,018 --> 00:10:45,019
<i>Okay.</i>

203
00:10:45,812 --> 00:10:47,856
<i>Wednesday, 8:00 p.m.</i>

204
00:10:50,900 --> 00:10:54,320
<i>Deleted. Deleted. Deleted.</i>

205
00:10:56,739 --> 00:10:58,116
I deleted Big.

206
00:10:58,241 --> 00:10:59,868
-You deleted Big?
-Yep.

207
00:11:00,451 --> 00:11:02,287
Did you call him to tell him
you deleted him?

208
00:11:02,370 --> 00:11:04,914
-Nope.
-Wow, that's new.

209
00:11:05,081 --> 00:11:08,001
Delete, delete, delete.
Three messages last week.

210
00:11:08,084 --> 00:11:10,420
-What do you think he was calling about?
-Don't know.

211
00:11:10,795 --> 00:11:13,631
And for the first time,
don't really care.

212
00:11:13,965 --> 00:11:17,468
After his last trip, I finally got it.
What's the point?

213
00:11:19,387 --> 00:11:21,472
Things are serious with the Russian.

214
00:11:21,890 --> 00:11:23,975
Really? That's great.

215
00:11:24,350 --> 00:11:27,061
It's just so different and so...

216
00:11:27,478 --> 00:11:28,521
What?

217
00:11:29,898 --> 00:11:32,192
It's grown up.
There's not a lot of fuss,

218
00:11:32,275 --> 00:11:37,071
there's no confusion about how he feels
about me, he tells me all the time.

219
00:11:37,363 --> 00:11:39,616
Unlike answering machine
up there in Napa.

220
00:11:39,699 --> 00:11:41,576
-Sounds perfect.
-Yeah.

221
00:11:42,368 --> 00:11:44,412
-There's just one thing.
-Thank God.

222
00:11:44,662 --> 00:11:46,414
I was beginning to feel bad
about Steve and me.

223
00:11:46,497 --> 00:11:47,832
What's the thing?

224
00:11:47,916 --> 00:11:48,917
Well,

225
00:11:50,084 --> 00:11:53,713
we don't really have anything
in common but each other.

226
00:11:54,464 --> 00:11:57,050
We're not really involved
in each other's lives.

227
00:11:57,884 --> 00:12:00,303
He never shares anything about his work.

228
00:12:00,386 --> 00:12:01,930
I don't talk to Steve about my work.

229
00:12:02,013 --> 00:12:04,515
-And he doesn't mind?
-I think he prefers it that way.

230
00:12:04,599 --> 00:12:06,309
But you guys share everything else.

231
00:12:06,684 --> 00:12:09,395
Because we're in Brooklyn.
There's no one else to talk to.

232
00:12:10,563 --> 00:12:13,066
Besides, Carrie,
every couple's different.

233
00:12:13,858 --> 00:12:18,613
Yeah, I guess I just had this idea
about a couple sharing everything.

234
00:12:18,988 --> 00:12:20,657
At least their passions.

235
00:12:20,740 --> 00:12:22,742
You want passions on top of passion?

236
00:12:27,247 --> 00:12:28,957
Hey, Carrie, welcome back.

237
00:12:29,040 --> 00:12:31,000
You see the new walls?
Nice progress, huh?

238
00:12:31,084 --> 00:12:34,754
-I'll say. It's really coming together.
-What's all that?

239
00:12:34,837 --> 00:12:37,423
Oh, I stopped off and picked up
some dessert for you ladies.

240
00:12:37,507 --> 00:12:40,343
Brooklyn's finest,
we have cheese cake,

241
00:12:41,052 --> 00:12:41,970
and cannolis.

242
00:12:42,053 --> 00:12:43,846
What a delightful borough.

243
00:12:43,930 --> 00:12:45,473
I'll put this stuff out in the kitchen.

244
00:12:47,642 --> 00:12:49,018
I love having your friends over.

245
00:12:53,231 --> 00:12:55,692
I want you to meet him, my Russian.

246
00:12:55,984 --> 00:12:57,318
Can't wait.

247
00:12:59,028 --> 00:13:01,364
That log is really
heating up the joint, huh?

248
00:13:05,827 --> 00:13:06,828
Good morning.

249
00:13:07,453 --> 00:13:08,788
All night again?

250
00:13:09,622 --> 00:13:10,999
How's the work going?

251
00:13:11,833 --> 00:13:13,918
<i>It was clear from his silence
we weren't having</i>

252
00:13:14,002 --> 00:13:16,212
<i>passions on top of passions
for breakfast.</i>

253
00:13:16,296 --> 00:13:18,548
Hey, what are you doing Sunday night?

254
00:13:18,631 --> 00:13:20,216
I have no idea, why?

255
00:13:20,300 --> 00:13:24,971
Well, I was thinking since I met
some of your friends the other day,

256
00:13:25,054 --> 00:13:26,806
maybe you could meet some of my friends.

257
00:13:27,056 --> 00:13:29,851
Those people were my colleagues,
not my friends.

258
00:13:29,934 --> 00:13:31,853
My friends are mostly in Europe.

259
00:13:31,936 --> 00:13:34,731
Well, my friends are here.
And they're fantastic.

260
00:13:35,148 --> 00:13:37,900
Then on Sunday, I'll be happy
to meet your fantastic friends.

261
00:13:38,192 --> 00:13:39,444
Oh goody.

262
00:13:40,028 --> 00:13:43,531
And FYI, you have
a friend in New York, me.

263
00:13:43,865 --> 00:13:45,867
You're not my friend, you're my lover.

264
00:13:46,242 --> 00:13:48,578
And that is a much better thing.

265
00:13:51,956 --> 00:13:53,750
Mmm. Come to bed.

266
00:13:53,875 --> 00:13:56,085
Oh, no, no, no. I have to go home.

267
00:13:56,169 --> 00:13:58,421
I have to write my column.
I can't turn it in late again.

268
00:13:59,297 --> 00:14:00,381
Work here.

269
00:14:00,465 --> 00:14:01,966
I can't, my computer's at home.

270
00:14:02,383 --> 00:14:05,261
I have a computer very good
for writing columns.

271
00:14:06,346 --> 00:14:09,182
You would let me use
your fancy computer?

272
00:14:09,557 --> 00:14:10,808
Mmm-hmm.

273
00:14:11,017 --> 00:14:13,811
In exchange for one hour in bed.

274
00:14:17,648 --> 00:14:18,691
Okay.

275
00:14:21,569 --> 00:14:25,615
<i>They say that opposites attract,
but they never say for how long.</i>

276
00:14:26,157 --> 00:14:29,243
<i>Should the relationship-savvy person
stoke the fires of passion</i>

277
00:14:29,327 --> 00:14:31,412
<i>with the kindling of work and friends</i>

278
00:14:31,496 --> 00:14:35,083
<i>or should we simply be satisfied
with the romance that sizzles?</i>

279
00:14:35,792 --> 00:14:37,377
<i>I couldn't help but wonder.</i>

280
00:14:37,460 --> 00:14:39,420
<i>Without sharing your worlds,</i>

281
00:14:39,504 --> 00:14:42,382
<i>can even the hottest relationship
stop cold?</i>

282
00:14:48,388 --> 00:14:49,597
-Um...

283
00:14:51,933 --> 00:14:54,477
<i>Meanwhile, Samantha was about to
hear the hottest rumor</i>

284
00:14:54,560 --> 00:14:56,562
<i>from the city's hottest rumor mill.</i>

285
00:14:57,063 --> 00:14:58,815
<i>Two young PR girls.</i>

286
00:14:58,898 --> 00:15:01,776
Did you see that picture
of Smith Jerrod online?

287
00:15:01,859 --> 00:15:03,194
I can't believe he's gay.

288
00:15:03,277 --> 00:15:05,446
No one that good-looking
is ever straight.

289
00:15:05,530 --> 00:15:07,365
I thought he was dating Samantha Jones.

290
00:15:07,448 --> 00:15:10,660
All this time, I thought she had
the hottest sex life in New York City.

291
00:15:10,743 --> 00:15:12,578
Turns out she's just a fag hag.

292
00:15:12,703 --> 00:15:15,331
<i>And that stopped Samantha cold.</i>

293
00:15:16,332 --> 00:15:17,792
<i>And here comes
the hound group.</i>

294
00:15:18,251 --> 00:15:19,961
<i>This is a beautiful group.</i>

295
00:15:20,044 --> 00:15:23,214
<i>There's the Pharaoh Hound champion
Eleanor Pendragon,</i>

296
00:15:23,297 --> 00:15:25,425
<i>four-time Best in Show winner.</i>

297
00:15:25,508 --> 00:15:27,343
<i>And take a look at that outfit.</i>

298
00:15:27,927 --> 00:15:29,637
Everyone's talking about me.

299
00:15:30,012 --> 00:15:33,141
In the blink of a tabloid,
I went from Demi to Liza.

300
00:15:33,224 --> 00:15:35,059
At least people know who you are.

301
00:15:35,143 --> 00:15:37,478
"Unidentified older gay gentleman."

302
00:15:37,770 --> 00:15:40,189
Marcus got three auditions
off that picture.

303
00:15:40,565 --> 00:15:41,774
I got outed.

304
00:15:41,941 --> 00:15:43,651
Oh, poor Stanny.

305
00:15:44,152 --> 00:15:46,362
How can they just assume I'm gay?

306
00:15:48,865 --> 00:15:52,618
Okay, I've got ten bucks on
Lord Reginald the Fourth down there.

307
00:15:52,702 --> 00:15:55,163
-Any takers?
-Oh, you are a good friend.

308
00:15:55,246 --> 00:15:57,748
All the way from Brooklyn to see
a bunch of dogs run in a circle.

309
00:15:57,832 --> 00:16:01,210
She came to watch my baby get baptized,
I came to watch her baby get judged.

310
00:16:01,294 --> 00:16:03,880
I almost didn't show my face. "Fag hag."

311
00:16:03,963 --> 00:16:07,175
There go years and years of
fucking everything that walks.

312
00:16:07,550 --> 00:16:09,760
I thought you weren't gonna
sweat the small stuff.

313
00:16:09,844 --> 00:16:12,472
Look, I can't have cancer
and be a fag hag.

314
00:16:12,555 --> 00:16:14,765
Hey, you guys want to have drinks
with the Russian tomorrow night?

315
00:16:14,849 --> 00:16:15,725
-Sure.
-Oh, I'm in.

316
00:16:15,808 --> 00:16:16,976
Me, too.

317
00:16:17,059 --> 00:16:19,562
Oh, sweetie, I'm sorry.
It's just the girls this time.

318
00:16:19,812 --> 00:16:23,608
Oh, what am I now?
Your unidentified older gay friend?

319
00:16:23,691 --> 00:16:25,359
You'll be in the next round, I promise.

320
00:16:25,443 --> 00:16:27,737
Okay, I gotta go backstage
and check on the little mother.

321
00:16:27,820 --> 00:16:28,738
Well, take your time.

322
00:16:28,821 --> 00:16:32,950
We've still got sporting
and working and toy. Oh my.

323
00:16:36,454 --> 00:16:39,081
This was not the type of blow job
I was hoping for today.

324
00:16:39,582 --> 00:16:43,461
She looks so pretty. Yes, she does.

325
00:16:43,753 --> 00:16:45,838
Did you see how impressed
the host committee was?

326
00:16:45,922 --> 00:16:47,465
I really think she has a chance.

327
00:16:47,548 --> 00:16:49,467
You know, you think
with all these faggy little dogs,

328
00:16:49,550 --> 00:16:52,261
there'd be at least
one horny circuit muscle gay here.

329
00:16:52,345 --> 00:16:56,182
No, nothing but boxy thick-legged ladies
and tweedy old queens.

330
00:16:56,265 --> 00:16:57,350
Shh.

331
00:16:57,850 --> 00:16:58,809
-Char.
-Hmm?

332
00:16:58,893 --> 00:17:00,394
Did you cut yourself with the scissors?

333
00:17:00,478 --> 00:17:01,771
There are drops of blood here.

334
00:17:03,481 --> 00:17:05,858
Wait, it's coming from her.

335
00:17:06,234 --> 00:17:10,780
-No. Don't tell me.
-Oh no, she's in heat.

336
00:17:11,072 --> 00:17:12,907
-Hey, how's it--

337
00:17:13,574 --> 00:17:16,035
-What's wrong?
-The freaking dog just got her period.

338
00:17:16,244 --> 00:17:19,247
-Excuse me?
-Oh, yeah, Aunt Flo's in doggy town.

339
00:17:19,580 --> 00:17:21,457
-Show over.
- Don't say that.

340
00:17:21,541 --> 00:17:22,667
We can still compete.

341
00:17:22,750 --> 00:17:25,086
I once won a junior gymnastics meet
when I had mine.

342
00:17:25,711 --> 00:17:27,421
It's a dog.

343
00:17:27,505 --> 00:17:30,383
What are you gonna do? Run around
looking for a teeny tiny tampon?

344
00:17:35,388 --> 00:17:36,889
You're right, it's not funny.

345
00:17:37,139 --> 00:17:38,975
I'm a woman. I should know better.

346
00:17:45,189 --> 00:17:47,984
Trouble. Elizabeth Taylor
just got her period.

347
00:17:48,067 --> 00:17:49,277
-What?
-Mmm-hmm.

348
00:17:49,360 --> 00:17:51,320
Backstage. That time of the month.

349
00:17:51,487 --> 00:17:53,364
I thought she looked a little bloated.

350
00:17:53,447 --> 00:17:55,575
And she was so bitchy earlier.

351
00:17:57,034 --> 00:17:58,869
<i>And here come the toy dogs.</i>

352
00:17:59,245 --> 00:18:03,249
<i>Many viewers don't realize
that these little dogs can actually</i>

353
00:18:03,332 --> 00:18:06,460
<i>be a lot harder to care for
than ones ten times their size.</i>

354
00:18:06,544 --> 00:18:10,172
<i>Grooming a Yorkie or a Pomeranian
like Champion Philip Turner</i>

355
00:18:10,256 --> 00:18:12,425
<i>can take up to three hours a go.</i>

356
00:18:12,508 --> 00:18:14,635
<i>Gait is important for this group,</i>

357
00:18:14,719 --> 00:18:17,305
<i>and the King Charles Spaniel
is moving nicely.</i>

358
00:18:17,388 --> 00:18:20,641
<i>Next to her is the Shih Tzu,
and there's the Maltese</i>

359
00:18:20,725 --> 00:18:24,854
<i>followed by Miniature Pinscher
champion Big Bark Little Bite.</i>

360
00:18:32,236 --> 00:18:34,905
<i>The judges narrowed it down
to the Toy Poodle,</i>

361
00:18:34,989 --> 00:18:39,577
<i>champion Diamond Pico,
the Shih Tzu, champion Yurosaki,</i>

362
00:18:39,660 --> 00:18:42,913
<i>the Pomeranian,
champion Justine Greystoke,</i>

363
00:18:42,997 --> 00:18:45,875
<i>and the King Charles Spaniel,
Elizabeth Taylor.</i>

364
00:18:46,709 --> 00:18:49,920
Come on, Elizabeth Taylor. Woo!

365
00:18:58,512 --> 00:19:00,931
<i>Charlotte was
a dog show natural.</i>

366
00:19:01,265 --> 00:19:03,517
<i>Thanks to her blue blood background.</i>

367
00:19:05,102 --> 00:19:06,437
Let me see the move.

368
00:19:07,104 --> 00:19:08,522
<i>And speaking of blood...</i>

369
00:19:15,905 --> 00:19:18,783
<i>The judge is examining
the dogs' gaits one more time</i>

370
00:19:18,866 --> 00:19:20,618
<i>before he makes his decision.</i>

371
00:19:20,701 --> 00:19:21,952
Okay, Elizabeth.

372
00:19:22,244 --> 00:19:23,704
-One.

373
00:19:24,330 --> 00:19:29,251
<i>It's the King Charles
Spaniel, followed by the Shih Tzu,</i>

374
00:19:29,335 --> 00:19:32,213
<i>-the Pomeranian, and the Toy Poodle.</i>
-That's my friend.

375
00:19:32,713 --> 00:19:34,590
<i>All the dogs were champions,</i>

376
00:19:34,674 --> 00:19:38,636
<i>but to the judge,
Charlotte was the best in show.</i>

377
00:19:39,345 --> 00:19:40,388
<i>Period.</i>

378
00:19:42,515 --> 00:19:45,518
Samantha Jones, I thought that was you.

379
00:19:45,601 --> 00:19:47,853
Tom, what are you doing here?

380
00:19:47,937 --> 00:19:49,480
I handle the press
for this tacky thing.

381
00:19:49,563 --> 00:19:50,439
Oh.

382
00:19:50,523 --> 00:19:53,442
Listen, could I get
Smith Jerrod's number?

383
00:19:53,776 --> 00:19:56,737
Tom, no. I'm fucking him.

384
00:19:57,530 --> 00:19:59,573
Sure you are.

385
00:20:03,035 --> 00:20:06,288
I'm a laughingstock.
I have got to put a stop to this.

386
00:20:06,956 --> 00:20:08,958
<i>And from dog show
to doggy show...</i>

387
00:20:09,458 --> 00:20:10,668
Are you sure you wanna do this?

388
00:20:10,751 --> 00:20:12,211
It worked for Paris Hilton.

389
00:20:12,336 --> 00:20:14,839
I need to set
the record straight, literally.

390
00:20:15,047 --> 00:20:16,799
But I don't care
if people think I'm gay.

391
00:20:19,468 --> 00:20:21,095
This isn't about you.

392
00:20:21,595 --> 00:20:24,223
Now, when we get going,
make sure to say,

393
00:20:24,306 --> 00:20:27,476
"Samantha Jones,
you are one hot piece of ass.

394
00:20:27,560 --> 00:20:30,271
I could fuck you all night long,
Samantha Jones."

395
00:20:32,148 --> 00:20:33,649
How are you going to get this around?

396
00:20:33,816 --> 00:20:38,738
I'm a PR pro. I know exactly
whose hands to drop this into.

397
00:20:39,613 --> 00:20:44,493
<i>The very next day, two PR girls
got an anonymous triple X from FedEx.</i>

398
00:20:45,411 --> 00:20:47,413
- Go get it!

399
00:20:50,374 --> 00:20:53,294
You have to come next time,
she was so happy.

400
00:20:53,502 --> 00:20:56,881
You know what would make her happy?
Letting her off that show leash.

401
00:20:57,089 --> 00:21:00,092
Oh, no, I don't think so.
What if she gets hurt?

402
00:21:00,259 --> 00:21:03,721
Come on, honey. Give her a little
victory lap on her own.

403
00:21:04,722 --> 00:21:09,310
You're right. Okay, Elizabeth. Go play.

404
00:21:18,152 --> 00:21:23,324
Oh, look, she made a little friend,
isn't that sweet?

405
00:21:27,286 --> 00:21:32,416
Oh, oh, no. No, stop, stop that.

406
00:21:32,666 --> 00:21:34,710
She's a blue ribbon winner, stop.

407
00:21:34,877 --> 00:21:40,090
Stop it. Honey, go.
Do something, Harry. Hurry.

408
00:21:40,299 --> 00:21:42,426
-Stop it. She's in heat.
-Stay away.

409
00:21:42,510 --> 00:21:47,139
No, stop it, get off.
Get off Elizabeth Taylor.

410
00:21:47,431 --> 00:21:49,767
Watch out. More coming, honey. Oh!

411
00:21:51,185 --> 00:21:53,103
Watch out for the big one.

412
00:21:53,187 --> 00:21:54,730
- Hey, hey, hey, shoo!
-Oh!

413
00:21:55,314 --> 00:21:57,858
Elizabeth Taylor got gangbanged
in the park?

414
00:21:57,942 --> 00:21:59,652
Oh, God, that is so '80s.

415
00:21:59,735 --> 00:22:03,405
<i>There we were at Asia de Cuba
waiting for my lover de Russia.</i>

416
00:22:03,489 --> 00:22:04,573
-Oh!

417
00:22:05,991 --> 00:22:07,785
Hi, where are you?

418
00:22:08,160 --> 00:22:10,830
Seriously, I could not believe
how many dogs she was with.

419
00:22:10,913 --> 00:22:13,374
It was disgusting, my sweet little girl.

420
00:22:13,499 --> 00:22:15,251
Well, I think she's a woman now.

421
00:22:15,334 --> 00:22:17,670
-Oh, really?

422
00:22:18,712 --> 00:22:20,881
No, no, I understand.

423
00:22:21,590 --> 00:22:23,509
Oh, okay, I will.

424
00:22:24,051 --> 00:22:25,302
Okay.

425
00:22:26,846 --> 00:22:30,015
-Yeah, he's not gonna make it.
-Ah, that's too bad.

426
00:22:30,099 --> 00:22:30,933
Is he okay?

427
00:22:31,016 --> 00:22:33,561
Yeah. No, he's just in the middle of
something at his studio.

428
00:22:33,644 --> 00:22:35,396
-He can't stop right now.
-I understand.

429
00:22:35,479 --> 00:22:37,606
If he's feeling inspired
then he shouldn't stop.

430
00:22:37,731 --> 00:22:41,235
He's getting ready for this big exhibit
at some Paris museum.

431
00:22:41,318 --> 00:22:43,028
He's been staying up nights.

432
00:22:43,112 --> 00:22:46,323
Oh, I'm disappointed.
I wanted you guys to meet him.

433
00:22:46,407 --> 00:22:47,700
Another time.

434
00:22:48,868 --> 00:22:51,620
Compliments of Mr. Petrovksy
with sincere apologies.

435
00:22:51,704 --> 00:22:53,831
Aw.

436
00:22:55,124 --> 00:22:57,376
Hey, you know what,
why don't we finish these off,

437
00:22:57,459 --> 00:23:00,129
crack this open, give him some time
and then go over there and say hello.

438
00:23:00,212 --> 00:23:01,839
Oh, honey, you sure
you want to disturb him?

439
00:23:01,922 --> 00:23:03,299
Yeah, yeah, we'll just go say hi.

440
00:23:03,382 --> 00:23:05,467
He's always telling me
to be more spontaneous.

441
00:23:08,012 --> 00:23:11,307
<i>A couple cocktails
and a bottle of champagne later...</i>

442
00:23:13,559 --> 00:23:15,436
Eighth floor, Lingerie.

443
00:23:16,228 --> 00:23:19,857
-Uh, apartment, studio.
- Ah, oh.

444
00:23:20,232 --> 00:23:24,570
-He has the whole floor.
-Ooh.

445
00:23:24,820 --> 00:23:27,072
Wait a minute, wait a minute.

446
00:23:27,281 --> 00:23:29,283
Sister's got to get ready.

447
00:23:32,870 --> 00:23:35,664
-Hello?

448
00:23:41,337 --> 00:23:44,340
Oh! Hi, hi.

449
00:23:44,965 --> 00:23:48,010
-What are you doing?
-I'm being spontaneous.

450
00:23:48,218 --> 00:23:49,637
I told you I was working.

451
00:23:49,720 --> 00:23:52,264
I know, but I just wanted
my friends to meet you.

452
00:23:52,348 --> 00:23:54,266
Well, Charlotte, you've met.

453
00:23:54,350 --> 00:23:59,730
But, this is Miranda and Samantha,
a.k.a. Foxy Brown.

454
00:23:59,813 --> 00:24:01,482
-Hello.
-Hello.

455
00:24:03,651 --> 00:24:06,028
And I wanted them to see the house.

456
00:24:06,278 --> 00:24:08,447
When I say I'm working,
I'm working, okay?

457
00:24:08,530 --> 00:24:12,868
I'm sorry, guys, I'm very, very busy,
but please do stay.

458
00:24:12,952 --> 00:24:15,996
Enjoy the apartment,
we'll meet one day, all right?

459
00:24:16,288 --> 00:24:18,540
Sorry...

460
00:24:21,418 --> 00:24:23,170
Oh.

461
00:24:24,129 --> 00:24:26,423
I'm sorry, I thought...

462
00:24:26,924 --> 00:24:28,634
-It's fine.
-He's working.

463
00:24:28,717 --> 00:24:31,720
Oh, do you guys still want to
see the apartment?

464
00:24:32,596 --> 00:24:35,849
Well, it's late.
I should get back to Brooklyn

465
00:24:35,933 --> 00:24:37,726
before Steve thinks I've defected.

466
00:24:37,810 --> 00:24:40,521
Another time.
Foxy's ready to hang up her wig.

467
00:24:41,772 --> 00:24:44,066
Do you wanna come share
a cab with me uptown?

468
00:24:44,400 --> 00:24:48,821
Oh, no, no, I'm think I'm gonna stay.

469
00:24:49,363 --> 00:24:51,365
-Okay, nighty night.
-Okay, sleep tight.

470
00:24:51,448 --> 00:24:53,033
Bye.

471
00:24:54,535 --> 00:24:55,577
Bye.

472
00:25:08,340 --> 00:25:11,760
-I am so glad to be home.
-You are?

473
00:25:13,971 --> 00:25:16,098
I love you for loving my friends.

474
00:25:17,349 --> 00:25:22,521
And I love you for no walls,
and cheese cake, cannoli.

475
00:25:25,983 --> 00:25:30,320
Well, if you love me for that stuff,
what's gonna happen now?

476
00:25:31,864 --> 00:25:34,158
-I put in your DSL line.

477
00:25:35,576 --> 00:25:37,161
Steve.

478
00:25:50,883 --> 00:25:53,469
<i>And although Steve
had satisfied Miranda,</i>

479
00:25:54,136 --> 00:25:55,596
<i>she still wanted more.</i>

480
00:26:08,400 --> 00:26:10,944
<i>Samantha Jones,
you're one hot piece of ass.</i>

481
00:26:11,028 --> 00:26:11,987
<i>Yes.</i>

482
00:26:12,071 --> 00:26:13,739
<i>I'd fuck you all night long,
Samantha Jones.</i>

483
00:26:16,742 --> 00:26:21,413
<i>Samantha's hot tape cooled
Miranda's love of gossip for good.</i>

484
00:26:23,123 --> 00:26:24,541
<i>Or at least for now.</i>

485
00:26:26,502 --> 00:26:27,628
<i>And try as I might,</i>

486
00:26:27,711 --> 00:26:31,548
<i>I could not forget the Russian's
icy treatment of my friends.</i>

487
00:26:37,638 --> 00:26:39,973
Hey, I need to talk to you.

488
00:26:43,352 --> 00:26:47,439
Uh, I know that you're busy,
but those were my...

489
00:26:49,525 --> 00:26:50,776
Is something...

490
00:26:51,610 --> 00:26:52,778
Are you okay?

491
00:26:55,030 --> 00:26:56,281
Yeah, I'm fine.

492
00:27:04,915 --> 00:27:06,500
No, you are not fine.

493
00:27:09,253 --> 00:27:13,799
Did something happen with... the piece?

494
00:27:15,551 --> 00:27:17,010
Hey, come on, talk to me.

495
00:27:21,765 --> 00:27:24,434
What if it's not enough, huh?

496
00:27:25,477 --> 00:27:26,645
All these pieces,

497
00:27:28,355 --> 00:27:29,439
six years.

498
00:27:29,857 --> 00:27:31,233
It's going to be enough.

499
00:27:32,526 --> 00:27:35,279
It's true I don't know anything
about the piece but...

500
00:27:39,449 --> 00:27:40,742
you are brilliant.

501
00:27:43,495 --> 00:27:47,124
"The world is waiting with breath
that is baited."

502
00:27:48,667 --> 00:27:51,837
Oh, she's just an uptight bitch.

503
00:27:53,213 --> 00:27:54,631
Well, that's better.

504
00:27:54,882 --> 00:27:56,425
You're a little scary.

505
00:27:59,303 --> 00:28:01,054
So, talk to me, what's the problem?

506
00:28:01,263 --> 00:28:04,850
I may not understand, but...
But I'll listen.

507
00:28:08,770 --> 00:28:10,647
Well...

508
00:28:12,191 --> 00:28:14,443
Yesterday I looked up,

509
00:28:14,526 --> 00:28:20,908
and the entire thing
looked so utterly stupid

510
00:28:20,991 --> 00:28:24,286
and flat and needless and childish...

511
00:28:24,912 --> 00:28:26,955
<i>It's a cold hard fact.</i>

512
00:28:27,581 --> 00:28:32,336
<i>Sometimes, there's not enough time
in a night for both your worlds.</i>

513
00:28:32,419 --> 00:28:34,379
<i>I'm only afraid of one monster</i>

514
00:28:34,504 --> 00:28:36,465
Not at all what I hoped...

515
00:28:37,007 --> 00:28:40,761
<i>I stand illuminated...</i>