1 00:00:00,627 --> 00:00:03,630 "Will & Grace" is shot before a live studio audience. 2 00:00:03,696 --> 00:00:07,300 Okay, so I got two poached eggs for Grace, 3 00:00:07,367 --> 00:00:09,335 one over easy for Jack, 4 00:00:09,402 --> 00:00:12,672 and eggs Benedict for Karen, sub vodka for bread, 5 00:00:12,739 --> 00:00:14,890 and tomato juice for everything else. 6 00:00:15,942 --> 00:00:18,812 Thanks for the bloody, Mary. 7 00:00:20,947 --> 00:00:23,516 You're in a good mood. Wonder why that is. 8 00:00:23,583 --> 00:00:27,487 I know it's not from having sex or stepping on a scale. 9 00:00:27,554 --> 00:00:29,989 Oh, did Target release a new dish scrubber? 10 00:00:34,394 --> 00:00:36,870 He literally just made you eggs. 11 00:00:37,597 --> 00:00:39,999 I am in a good mood 'cause I finally found a woman 12 00:00:40,024 --> 00:00:41,692 with a perfect uterus. 13 00:00:41,968 --> 00:00:44,611 You're a dirty dog, Will. 14 00:00:45,572 --> 00:00:47,990 I knew you'd find your way back. 15 00:00:48,773 --> 00:00:52,544 It's got to be a real kick in the balls for you, Red. 16 00:00:56,749 --> 00:00:59,085 I'm talking, of course, about a surrogate. 17 00:00:59,152 --> 00:01:01,554 Her name's Jenny, she's been through the process before, 18 00:01:01,621 --> 00:01:04,290 and her lady apparatus gets stellar reviews. 19 00:01:04,357 --> 00:01:05,883 Apparatus? 20 00:01:06,499 --> 00:01:09,303 Sounds like Jay Leno built it in his garage. 21 00:01:10,163 --> 00:01:11,865 So you have an egg donor, 22 00:01:11,931 --> 00:01:13,746 but this other woman is gonna carry 23 00:01:13,771 --> 00:01:16,142 your gay baby for nine months? 24 00:01:16,167 --> 00:01:19,271 How much is making God cry going to cost you? 25 00:01:20,440 --> 00:01:21,708 It's not about the money. 26 00:01:21,774 --> 00:01:23,776 She just loves helping people become parents. 27 00:01:23,801 --> 00:01:25,336 30 grand. 28 00:01:25,445 --> 00:01:28,155 Why do women get all the best jobs? 29 00:01:29,449 --> 00:01:31,151 Oh. I should go. 30 00:01:31,217 --> 00:01:32,552 I still got to figure out 31 00:01:32,577 --> 00:01:34,679 how I'm gonna get up to Newburgh to meet her. 32 00:01:34,704 --> 00:01:36,139 I can't even picture where that is. 33 00:01:36,164 --> 00:01:37,866 You know, in my mind, it goes New York, 34 00:01:38,057 --> 00:01:40,927 the Neiman's in White Plains, then Canada. 35 00:01:40,952 --> 00:01:43,121 Oh, that's a coinky-dink. 36 00:01:43,146 --> 00:01:45,315 I'm going to the ballpark in Blattsville. 37 00:01:45,340 --> 00:01:47,925 I go right through Newburgh. 38 00:01:48,394 --> 00:01:50,385 Well, good luck with whatever your thing is. 39 00:01:52,539 --> 00:01:54,807 Karen, can I get a ride? 40 00:01:54,874 --> 00:01:58,310 It's really out of my way, but fine. 41 00:01:58,978 --> 00:02:02,022 You can hold the steering wheel while I flash truckers. 42 00:02:07,055 --> 00:02:15,061 Synced & corrected by -robtor- www.addic7ed.com 43 00:02:15,086 --> 00:02:16,196 Look. 44 00:02:16,262 --> 00:02:18,598 There's a reunion today for anyone who played Annie 45 00:02:18,665 --> 00:02:20,967 on Broadway or national tours. 46 00:02:20,992 --> 00:02:22,417 What? 47 00:02:23,736 --> 00:02:25,538 - Annie-Con is today? - Yeah. 48 00:02:25,605 --> 00:02:27,273 Does it say who the guest of honor is? 49 00:02:27,340 --> 00:02:29,108 - I-I... - Sarah Jessica Parker. 50 00:02:29,175 --> 00:02:30,676 It's Sarah Jessica Parker! 51 00:02:32,512 --> 00:02:34,374 Oh, but it's sold out. 52 00:02:34,440 --> 00:02:39,052 Ugh. I wanted to play Annie so badly when I was a kid. 53 00:02:39,118 --> 00:02:40,820 My mom directed a production 54 00:02:40,845 --> 00:02:42,313 in the Schenectady Women's Center, 55 00:02:42,422 --> 00:02:46,192 and she cast herself as Mommy Warbucks. 56 00:02:46,775 --> 00:02:50,112 I sang my little heart out. 57 00:02:51,030 --> 00:02:54,908 And my own mother said I wasn't Annie material. 58 00:02:57,270 --> 00:02:58,738 You can get me into Annie-Con. 59 00:02:58,805 --> 00:02:59,539 How? 60 00:02:59,606 --> 00:03:01,140 You could've played Annie 40... 61 00:03:01,207 --> 00:03:03,109 Careful. 62 00:03:04,210 --> 00:03:06,446 Several years ago. 63 00:03:10,984 --> 00:03:12,901 One sec. 64 00:03:13,559 --> 00:03:15,628 Before I open this door, you should know I have a knife... 65 00:03:15,888 --> 00:03:17,222 and a dog. 66 00:03:18,023 --> 00:03:19,625 And the dog has a knife, too. 67 00:03:19,826 --> 00:03:21,995 Uh, it's Will. Will Truman. 68 00:03:22,061 --> 00:03:25,105 I feel weird 'cause I don't have a knife. 69 00:03:27,934 --> 00:03:29,702 Hey, sorry about the knife thing. 70 00:03:29,769 --> 00:03:32,238 It's kind of how we say hello in this neighborhood. 71 00:03:32,263 --> 00:03:33,614 Well, and good-bye. 72 00:03:35,107 --> 00:03:38,077 You must be Jenny. Wow. 73 00:03:38,104 --> 00:03:40,037 You, me, this is... 74 00:03:41,593 --> 00:03:43,162 this is us. 75 00:03:43,449 --> 00:03:45,218 Yeah. 76 00:03:45,285 --> 00:03:47,453 It's a big thing. We're gonna make a person. 77 00:03:48,655 --> 00:03:49,856 Excuse the mess. 78 00:03:49,922 --> 00:03:51,524 I hope you're not one of those gay guys 79 00:03:51,549 --> 00:03:53,251 that needs everything to be neat. 80 00:03:53,276 --> 00:03:54,843 What, me? No. 81 00:03:55,468 --> 00:03:58,905 Uh, I know I'm... I know I'm early. 82 00:03:59,098 --> 00:04:01,401 I got a ride with an insane person who thinks 83 00:04:01,467 --> 00:04:04,102 that stoplights are only for the 99%. 84 00:04:04,837 --> 00:04:07,814 The taxes I refuse to pay built those highways. 85 00:04:08,722 --> 00:04:10,043 Hi. Jenny. 86 00:04:10,109 --> 00:04:12,027 Well, hello, Hi-Jenny. 87 00:04:13,313 --> 00:04:14,905 I'm Hi-Karen. 88 00:04:17,150 --> 00:04:18,951 Oh, I like this one. 89 00:04:19,018 --> 00:04:22,021 Just a minute. I have to finish up a work thing. 90 00:04:23,696 --> 00:04:27,132 Well, she does have a nice uterus. 91 00:04:27,157 --> 00:04:28,425 What are you doing here? 92 00:04:28,628 --> 00:04:29,929 I had to tinkle. 93 00:04:29,996 --> 00:04:31,764 Well, you couldn't do it somewhere else? 94 00:04:31,831 --> 00:04:34,400 I usually go in the car and hand it to driver, 95 00:04:34,467 --> 00:04:35,568 but he just joined a union, 96 00:04:35,635 --> 00:04:37,844 and now he's technically a person. 97 00:04:45,978 --> 00:04:47,880 Oh, God. 98 00:04:49,868 --> 00:04:52,437 Oh, no, no. 99 00:04:52,462 --> 00:04:55,487 Maybe just one. Eenie, meenie, miney, filthy. 100 00:04:57,976 --> 00:05:00,012 Okay, guys, I'm signing off. 101 00:05:00,286 --> 00:05:01,928 Mike, we already talked about this. 102 00:05:01,994 --> 00:05:03,429 I don't like that aggressive crap. 103 00:05:03,496 --> 00:05:05,031 Guys, you know the rules. 104 00:05:05,098 --> 00:05:06,366 If you don't play nice, you're gone. 105 00:05:08,000 --> 00:05:09,635 Thanks for the tip, Feenster. 106 00:05:11,070 --> 00:05:15,141 What is this? Is this a porn site? 107 00:05:15,208 --> 00:05:18,211 No, it's not porn. I'm a cam girl. 108 00:05:18,277 --> 00:05:22,215 Guys pay me a little to flirt, show some skin. 109 00:05:22,240 --> 00:05:25,777 "He looks super gay." Who? 110 00:05:25,802 --> 00:05:29,229 Guess what, DongerDoyle. I am super gay. 111 00:05:29,969 --> 00:05:32,571 Weird flex, but okay. 112 00:05:42,479 --> 00:05:45,716 Oh, my ginger. 113 00:05:48,407 --> 00:05:50,275 Think how much skin cancer there is 114 00:05:50,300 --> 00:05:52,002 in this room right now. 115 00:05:53,004 --> 00:05:54,606 Okay, okay, go up to that table 116 00:05:54,631 --> 00:05:57,101 and grab an unclaimed name tag, all right? 117 00:05:57,321 --> 00:06:00,658 And I'll scan the crowd for... Sarah! 118 00:06:00,683 --> 00:06:02,763 Oh, it was just a ladder. 119 00:06:04,556 --> 00:06:06,992 Welcome to Annie-Con. I'm Pam Muntz. 120 00:06:07,059 --> 00:06:10,395 I did two tours as stage manager in '03 and '09, 121 00:06:10,462 --> 00:06:12,864 plus three months of transitional protocol 122 00:06:12,931 --> 00:06:15,442 in the South Korean Theater in '98. 123 00:06:16,368 --> 00:06:18,153 Thank you for your service. 124 00:06:19,071 --> 00:06:22,140 I'm just gonna grab my name tag. 125 00:06:22,165 --> 00:06:23,867 - You're Ramona Delaney? - Mm-hmm. 126 00:06:23,976 --> 00:06:25,310 You're a legend. 127 00:06:25,377 --> 00:06:26,812 I can't believe you showed. 128 00:06:26,878 --> 00:06:28,180 Thank you. 129 00:06:28,246 --> 00:06:30,983 It's always nice to meet the fans. 130 00:06:31,049 --> 00:06:34,586 We are in, and apparently, I'm a legend. 131 00:06:34,653 --> 00:06:37,556 Oh, crap. Jerry Sussman is here. 132 00:06:37,622 --> 00:06:39,891 He used to be a catty audition accompanist, 133 00:06:39,958 --> 00:06:43,136 then he made it big, and now he's a big, huge pianist. 134 00:06:44,162 --> 00:06:45,097 Uh, what was that? 135 00:06:45,163 --> 00:06:47,432 A big, huge pianist. 136 00:06:47,499 --> 00:06:49,309 I just heard that. That's amazing. 137 00:06:50,635 --> 00:06:52,070 But he's the worst. 138 00:06:52,095 --> 00:06:53,330 Hello, Jack. 139 00:06:53,355 --> 00:06:56,233 Hello, Jerry. Nancy meeting you here. 140 00:06:57,409 --> 00:06:58,825 That fell a little flat. 141 00:06:58,892 --> 00:07:02,180 Just like the G you tried to hit in "Corner of the Sky" 142 00:07:02,205 --> 00:07:03,907 at that non-equity "Rent" audition. 143 00:07:04,016 --> 00:07:09,621 You were, like, "G, what if this were an F-sharp?" 144 00:07:09,965 --> 00:07:12,557 Oh, my God. Ramona Delaney. 145 00:07:12,624 --> 00:07:14,851 Uh, yes, it is. That's... that's me. 146 00:07:14,852 --> 00:07:16,645 I've been obsessed with you since forever. 147 00:07:16,670 --> 00:07:17,938 You were born to play Annie. 148 00:07:17,963 --> 00:07:19,732 Thank you, thank you. 149 00:07:19,757 --> 00:07:21,259 I always thought the same. 150 00:07:21,500 --> 00:07:23,735 My mother said I wasn't Annie material, 151 00:07:23,802 --> 00:07:25,037 but I guess she was wrong. 152 00:07:25,103 --> 00:07:26,405 So wrong. 153 00:07:26,471 --> 00:07:27,772 Like when Jack tries to sing. 154 00:07:27,773 --> 00:07:29,107 Beat it, Jerry. 155 00:07:30,776 --> 00:07:32,477 Obsessed. 156 00:07:33,845 --> 00:07:37,449 I thought that pianist would never get out of my face. 157 00:07:37,516 --> 00:07:39,359 Never said that sentence before. 158 00:07:40,385 --> 00:07:43,955 This is so amazing. 159 00:07:44,022 --> 00:07:47,826 It's like I get to experience all the joys of living my dream 160 00:07:47,893 --> 00:07:49,928 with none of the bad parts. 161 00:07:49,995 --> 00:07:52,998 Ramona? Ramona Delaney? 162 00:07:53,065 --> 00:07:54,599 Is that really you? 163 00:07:55,666 --> 00:07:57,419 It is. Would you like a picture? 164 00:07:59,571 --> 00:08:03,208 I've wanted to do that for 36 years. 165 00:08:10,315 --> 00:08:11,917 Okay, Will, I drained the main vein. 166 00:08:11,983 --> 00:08:13,151 I'll be in the car. 167 00:08:13,218 --> 00:08:16,021 Good Lord, is this the Port Authority? 168 00:08:16,088 --> 00:08:19,791 Yeah, you just missed the Greyhound in the living room. 169 00:08:19,858 --> 00:08:20,826 Who are you? 170 00:08:20,892 --> 00:08:22,427 Karen Walker. 171 00:08:22,494 --> 00:08:24,596 I drove my sissy friend here to meet a surrogate. 172 00:08:24,663 --> 00:08:27,407 Oh, don't tell him I called him a friend. 173 00:08:29,000 --> 00:08:30,669 The surrogate's my sister. 174 00:08:30,735 --> 00:08:31,769 I see. 175 00:08:31,770 --> 00:08:34,372 And you're faking a disability so that you can cash 176 00:08:34,439 --> 00:08:37,000 a government check to buy cigarettes? 177 00:08:38,110 --> 00:08:39,778 Shrapnel from an IED 178 00:08:39,845 --> 00:08:43,348 destroyed my C7 vertebra in Iraq three years ago. 179 00:08:43,415 --> 00:08:45,283 Well, then you must've been on vacation 180 00:08:45,350 --> 00:08:48,486 because we liberated Iraq in 2003. 181 00:08:49,454 --> 00:08:51,473 Mission accomplished. 182 00:08:53,017 --> 00:08:55,685 Those must've been tourists who were shooting at me. 183 00:08:57,241 --> 00:08:58,142 Huh. 184 00:08:58,430 --> 00:09:00,198 Okay, go for it. 185 00:09:00,265 --> 00:09:02,167 I know you want to call me a brave hero 186 00:09:02,234 --> 00:09:03,368 with tears in your eyes. 187 00:09:03,435 --> 00:09:05,137 Honey, I'm the brave one. 188 00:09:05,203 --> 00:09:09,508 I just flushed a toilet myself for the first time in 20 years. 189 00:09:12,377 --> 00:09:13,545 Do a lot of people do that? 190 00:09:13,612 --> 00:09:15,580 I'm inspiration porn. 191 00:09:17,246 --> 00:09:19,575 You're dry and bitter. 192 00:09:19,618 --> 00:09:22,337 Two things I like in a drink and a man. 193 00:09:22,988 --> 00:09:25,056 Hey, can you help me get some pills? 194 00:09:25,123 --> 00:09:27,392 What kind of woman do I look like? 195 00:09:27,459 --> 00:09:29,594 The kind who goes to international waters 196 00:09:29,619 --> 00:09:31,429 for a doctor's appointment. 197 00:09:33,064 --> 00:09:35,267 I meant my pills. They rolled under the bed. 198 00:09:35,333 --> 00:09:36,452 Are you sure? 199 00:09:36,477 --> 00:09:39,195 I've got some black beauties, some green beans, 200 00:09:39,220 --> 00:09:43,591 and a half a bottle of California turnarounds. 201 00:09:43,742 --> 00:09:45,544 What's a California turnaround? 202 00:09:45,610 --> 00:09:47,612 You take one, you can drive to California, 203 00:09:47,679 --> 00:09:50,156 turn around, and drive back without sleeping. 204 00:09:51,750 --> 00:09:53,752 Those are a little Dark Web for me. 205 00:09:53,818 --> 00:09:55,520 Maybe just help me find the ones 206 00:09:55,587 --> 00:09:57,255 I actually have a prescription for. 207 00:09:57,322 --> 00:09:59,457 Well, if we're talking Dark Web, 208 00:09:59,524 --> 00:10:02,127 I've got one called the grassy knoll. 209 00:10:03,428 --> 00:10:06,089 It hits you in the head twice from two directions. 210 00:10:13,719 --> 00:10:16,455 Look, you're making way too big of a deal about this. 211 00:10:16,521 --> 00:10:18,523 Guys literally get on for 20 minutes, 212 00:10:18,590 --> 00:10:19,942 we chat, they hop off. 213 00:10:19,967 --> 00:10:22,230 Right, so they get on and get off. 214 00:10:23,295 --> 00:10:25,864 This wasn't on your profile. 215 00:10:25,931 --> 00:10:28,424 So any other things that I should know about you? 216 00:10:28,491 --> 00:10:30,363 Yeah, I mean, I make my own root beer. 217 00:10:30,569 --> 00:10:32,337 I once killed a drifter 218 00:10:32,404 --> 00:10:34,706 to watch the life drain from his eyes. 219 00:10:36,208 --> 00:10:37,871 That's a joke. 220 00:10:38,196 --> 00:10:40,131 - Both parts. - Okay, okay. 221 00:10:40,379 --> 00:10:41,446 Look, it's no big deal. 222 00:10:41,447 --> 00:10:44,383 It pays the bills until somebody puts a baby in me. 223 00:10:45,536 --> 00:10:48,381 - Not what she meant. - Oh, not like that. 224 00:10:50,589 --> 00:10:51,885 Um... 225 00:10:52,070 --> 00:10:55,273 I'm not saying this in a... in a judgmental way... 226 00:10:55,539 --> 00:10:57,141 despite the tone I hear in my voice 227 00:10:57,166 --> 00:10:58,667 and the face I'm trying not to make. 228 00:10:58,692 --> 00:10:59,827 Um... 229 00:11:00,098 --> 00:11:03,268 are you gonna be doing this while you're carrying my child? 230 00:11:03,335 --> 00:11:05,103 Look, I don't smoke. I don't drink. 231 00:11:05,170 --> 00:11:06,271 I don't do drugs. 232 00:11:06,296 --> 00:11:08,298 Nothing harmful goes into my body, 233 00:11:08,323 --> 00:11:09,958 and perfect babies comes out. 234 00:11:09,983 --> 00:11:12,552 I'm like a machine... but with emotions. 235 00:11:12,577 --> 00:11:14,679 So, like, machines in two years. 236 00:11:16,740 --> 00:11:19,677 You've done surrogacy before. I haven't. 237 00:11:19,702 --> 00:11:21,537 Um, I really want to trust you, but, you know, 238 00:11:21,562 --> 00:11:24,699 now that I've seen behind the curtain, 239 00:11:24,724 --> 00:11:27,627 literally, I, um... 240 00:11:27,685 --> 00:11:29,120 I just... I just... 241 00:11:29,428 --> 00:11:31,029 I got some things to think about. 242 00:11:31,054 --> 00:11:32,122 We're cool. 243 00:11:32,147 --> 00:11:34,116 Nobody gets that this is a big decision more than I do. 244 00:11:34,266 --> 00:11:36,134 Thanks. Thank you. 245 00:11:36,159 --> 00:11:37,427 Plus, your timing's perfect 246 00:11:37,452 --> 00:11:39,153 'cause my pimp's gonna be here any minute, 247 00:11:39,178 --> 00:11:41,267 and he really doesn't like white guys. 248 00:11:42,873 --> 00:11:44,475 Joking. 249 00:11:44,500 --> 00:11:46,336 - Both parts. - Both part, okay. 250 00:11:48,194 --> 00:11:49,948 Okay, okay, so I asked around, 251 00:11:50,015 --> 00:11:51,383 and the woman who threw the drink in your face 252 00:11:51,450 --> 00:11:52,818 is Molly McGann, 253 00:11:52,843 --> 00:11:55,846 and "you," Ramona Delaney, were her understudy. 254 00:11:55,871 --> 00:11:57,206 During previews, 255 00:11:57,231 --> 00:11:58,933 "you" gave her a bottle of water 256 00:11:58,958 --> 00:12:00,393 spiked with tabasco sauce, 257 00:12:00,418 --> 00:12:02,020 so she lost her voice during "Tomorrow," 258 00:12:02,045 --> 00:12:03,998 - and "you" replaced her. - Oh. 259 00:12:04,729 --> 00:12:07,031 That is terrible. 260 00:12:07,245 --> 00:12:08,586 But I was better, right? 261 00:12:09,701 --> 00:12:11,736 Okay, listen up, Annies. 262 00:12:11,761 --> 00:12:14,130 Apparently Sarah Jessica Parker is running late 263 00:12:14,155 --> 00:12:17,011 because she did not believe this was a real thing. 264 00:12:18,176 --> 00:12:21,680 So we're gonna need someone else to sing "Tomorrow." 265 00:12:21,746 --> 00:12:22,481 Hello. 266 00:12:22,547 --> 00:12:24,349 Obviously it should be a sing-off 267 00:12:24,416 --> 00:12:26,485 between Ramona and Molly. 268 00:12:27,652 --> 00:12:30,355 I'll do it. What do you say, Ramona? 269 00:12:30,422 --> 00:12:32,757 Are you scared for a fair fight? 270 00:12:32,782 --> 00:12:34,919 Molly, what I did to you was so awful, 271 00:12:34,962 --> 00:12:38,630 but I was a different person back then, literally. 272 00:12:39,890 --> 00:12:41,431 You sing that song for the fans. 273 00:12:41,475 --> 00:12:42,509 You deserve it. 274 00:12:42,534 --> 00:12:44,603 It figures you would back down. 275 00:12:44,628 --> 00:12:47,417 You were never Annie material anyway. 276 00:12:48,006 --> 00:12:51,343 What the freckle did you just say to me? 277 00:12:54,746 --> 00:12:56,477 How many of these do you take? 278 00:12:56,502 --> 00:12:58,720 - Two. - And how many do you want? 279 00:13:00,218 --> 00:13:01,152 Two. 280 00:13:01,177 --> 00:13:02,678 Really? 281 00:13:02,854 --> 00:13:04,422 Okay. 282 00:13:09,528 --> 00:13:11,129 Are you looking down my dress? 283 00:13:11,196 --> 00:13:12,400 No. 284 00:13:12,656 --> 00:13:14,444 How about now? 285 00:13:15,700 --> 00:13:17,302 Wow. Congrats. 286 00:13:17,369 --> 00:13:18,870 Oh, thanks. 287 00:13:18,895 --> 00:13:21,034 I just had them balanced and rotated. 288 00:13:24,728 --> 00:13:27,798 So it's just you and your sister squatting here? 289 00:13:27,946 --> 00:13:29,681 No girlfriend? 290 00:13:29,706 --> 00:13:31,975 Is there a Mrs. Wheelchair? 291 00:13:34,235 --> 00:13:36,555 I was engaged before my deployment, 292 00:13:36,580 --> 00:13:38,349 but, you know, things change. 293 00:13:38,456 --> 00:13:39,824 People grow apart. 294 00:13:39,849 --> 00:13:42,621 One of you suffers a catastrophic spinal injury. 295 00:13:42,646 --> 00:13:46,081 Has there been anyone else? You getting any? 296 00:13:46,106 --> 00:13:47,393 Oh, yeah. I'm rolling in it. 297 00:13:47,491 --> 00:13:48,427 Hmm. 298 00:13:49,293 --> 00:13:51,063 You're funny. 299 00:13:52,110 --> 00:13:53,858 You should do stand-up. 300 00:14:00,685 --> 00:14:01,653 Well... 301 00:14:01,686 --> 00:14:02,753 But I get it. 302 00:14:03,081 --> 00:14:04,516 Ever since my divorce, 303 00:14:04,583 --> 00:14:06,351 there hasn't been too much action 304 00:14:06,376 --> 00:14:08,311 on my southern front either. 305 00:14:08,336 --> 00:14:10,037 I find that hard to believe. 306 00:14:10,188 --> 00:14:13,962 I'd say something about taking cover in the bush here... 307 00:14:15,260 --> 00:14:16,728 but you seem like a lady. 308 00:14:16,795 --> 00:14:18,925 You're a terrible judge of character. 309 00:14:20,298 --> 00:14:22,567 Don't worry about me. I did my share. 310 00:14:22,592 --> 00:14:25,028 And maybe sex isn't that important. 311 00:14:25,136 --> 00:14:26,537 You know, I promised myself 312 00:14:26,562 --> 00:14:29,098 and my parole officer that I would never slap 313 00:14:29,123 --> 00:14:31,187 another man in a wheelchair. 314 00:14:32,336 --> 00:14:34,739 There are two things that are important in this life... 315 00:14:34,939 --> 00:14:36,875 sex and money. 316 00:14:36,914 --> 00:14:38,349 And if you don't have one, 317 00:14:38,374 --> 00:14:39,942 you sure as hell better have the other. 318 00:14:40,285 --> 00:14:43,116 Well, I guess I better pray to win the lottery. 319 00:14:43,468 --> 00:14:45,570 I think you're about to. 320 00:14:45,595 --> 00:14:48,865 As I said to Judith Lard at the Tenth Street Baths... 321 00:14:50,962 --> 00:14:55,267 It's about to get a lot hotter in here. 322 00:14:55,333 --> 00:14:58,670 Grace, you can't beat Molly McGann in a sing-off. 323 00:14:58,737 --> 00:15:00,505 She's a Broadway star. 324 00:15:00,572 --> 00:15:01,973 She played Tracy Turnblad 325 00:15:02,040 --> 00:15:04,220 and Eponine on an Alaskan cruise. 326 00:15:05,176 --> 00:15:06,678 Jack, I can do this. 327 00:15:06,703 --> 00:15:08,104 I am as good as... 328 00:15:08,129 --> 00:15:10,831 as any of those washed-up, old cruise ship Annies. 329 00:15:10,856 --> 00:15:12,825 How about having a little faith in me? 330 00:15:12,944 --> 00:15:15,012 I absolutely have faith in you. 331 00:15:15,037 --> 00:15:17,206 Let's try it one more time. Last eight bars. 332 00:15:17,248 --> 00:15:21,719 ♪ You're always a day ♪ 333 00:15:21,744 --> 00:15:32,832 ♪ Away! ♪ 334 00:15:36,433 --> 00:15:38,235 Hey, you want this extra water? 335 00:15:38,260 --> 00:15:39,661 - Yeah. - Don't drink it. 336 00:15:39,686 --> 00:15:41,154 Why? 337 00:15:41,179 --> 00:15:43,515 Oh, oh, oh, oh. 338 00:15:43,540 --> 00:15:45,909 You think I went to the trouble of putting tabasco 339 00:15:45,934 --> 00:15:47,202 in a sealed bottle of water 340 00:15:47,227 --> 00:15:49,229 and then re-sealed it just to sabotage you? 341 00:15:49,688 --> 00:15:51,790 Here, you want the one I already drank half of? 342 00:15:51,856 --> 00:15:53,925 Knock yourself out. 343 00:15:55,860 --> 00:15:57,562 I guess we were a little silly. 344 00:15:57,587 --> 00:15:59,355 I mean, it was an unopened bottle. 345 00:15:59,380 --> 00:16:02,084 No, Grace, we were very, very smart. 346 00:16:11,053 --> 00:16:13,986 Sure, Jenny's life choices are a little questionable, 347 00:16:14,068 --> 00:16:16,036 but, you know, maybe the surrogacy fee 348 00:16:16,061 --> 00:16:17,996 will help lift her out of where she is now. 349 00:16:18,021 --> 00:16:20,557 When did you start wearing a flag pin? 350 00:16:23,126 --> 00:16:26,362 I want to show I support the troops. 351 00:16:26,675 --> 00:16:29,822 Their full body weight, if necessary. 352 00:16:30,133 --> 00:16:32,669 In a position I may have just invented. 353 00:16:34,803 --> 00:16:36,705 I don't know what that means, but... 354 00:16:37,085 --> 00:16:38,620 you know, the more I think about it, 355 00:16:38,645 --> 00:16:41,981 the more I think I should give this to her. 356 00:16:42,006 --> 00:16:44,876 You know, maybe by helping me bring a life into this world, 357 00:16:44,901 --> 00:16:46,903 she'll also be saving her own. 358 00:16:46,928 --> 00:16:49,731 Who else can do that for her? DongerDoyle? 359 00:16:49,756 --> 00:16:51,657 I don't think so. 360 00:16:53,175 --> 00:16:54,276 It's her. 361 00:16:54,301 --> 00:16:55,469 Uh... 362 00:16:55,577 --> 00:16:58,013 "Not feeling it. Sorry. 363 00:16:58,038 --> 00:17:00,007 I'm gonna pass. Good luck." 364 00:17:01,753 --> 00:17:03,172 She's passing on me? 365 00:17:03,197 --> 00:17:07,235 Well, of course, she is. You're a snob. 366 00:17:08,323 --> 00:17:10,092 Oh, that's rich coming from you. 367 00:17:10,446 --> 00:17:13,141 Honey, everything's rich coming from me. 368 00:17:14,930 --> 00:17:16,632 I am not a snob. 369 00:17:16,886 --> 00:17:19,889 Her life choices are questionable. 370 00:17:19,914 --> 00:17:23,017 You're going to lift her out of where she is right now. 371 00:17:23,042 --> 00:17:24,143 Please. 372 00:17:24,168 --> 00:17:25,069 You were looking at her 373 00:17:25,094 --> 00:17:27,905 like she was wearing one of Grace's outfits. 374 00:17:29,524 --> 00:17:31,125 What do you want me to say? 375 00:17:31,150 --> 00:17:34,086 I mean, s-s-she's getting paid to show strange men her body. 376 00:17:34,111 --> 00:17:36,447 And you want her to stick to getting paid 377 00:17:36,472 --> 00:17:39,241 to let strange men put babies in her body. 378 00:17:39,266 --> 00:17:41,802 This is... that is complete... 379 00:17:41,827 --> 00:17:43,045 Since when... 380 00:17:43,859 --> 00:17:45,794 do you make so much sense? 381 00:17:45,819 --> 00:17:47,717 Look, I understand. 382 00:17:48,477 --> 00:17:50,579 You see someone living in that apartment, 383 00:17:50,604 --> 00:17:54,675 and you think, "Life gave them a raw deal." 384 00:17:54,700 --> 00:17:57,069 But when you let yourself see the whole picture, 385 00:17:57,412 --> 00:18:01,215 really roll a mile in their wheelchair... 386 00:18:02,851 --> 00:18:05,320 - They can surprise you... - Hmm. 387 00:18:05,345 --> 00:18:07,914 Like, a big surprise. 388 00:18:12,127 --> 00:18:14,494 Way bigger than you had expected. 389 00:18:16,411 --> 00:18:19,047 So big that it's difficult to take it all in 390 00:18:19,072 --> 00:18:20,541 but in a really good way. 391 00:18:26,822 --> 00:18:28,891 You know what I'm saying? 392 00:18:30,113 --> 00:18:31,393 I think you're saying 393 00:18:31,418 --> 00:18:33,721 I should check my assumptions about Jenny... 394 00:18:34,090 --> 00:18:35,858 and that also maybe you had sex 395 00:18:35,883 --> 00:18:38,476 with a well-endowed disabled person? 396 00:18:39,675 --> 00:18:41,521 Bingo and bango. 397 00:18:42,911 --> 00:18:45,680 ♪ I love you tomorrow ♪ 398 00:18:45,705 --> 00:18:50,009 ♪ You're only a day ♪ 399 00:18:50,034 --> 00:18:56,774 ♪ Away! ♪ 400 00:19:05,280 --> 00:19:07,713 Jack, I did it! That was all me. 401 00:19:07,738 --> 00:19:10,141 I am Annie material. 402 00:19:11,333 --> 00:19:14,736 I'm never gonna come down from this high. 403 00:19:14,990 --> 00:19:16,722 There you are. 404 00:19:18,453 --> 00:19:20,518 I'm Ramona Delaney. 405 00:19:20,896 --> 00:19:23,354 That was for pretending to be me. 406 00:19:27,770 --> 00:19:30,773 Is the theater world always this dramatic? 407 00:19:30,826 --> 00:19:32,280 Yes. 408 00:19:37,379 --> 00:19:39,147 Yes, it is. 409 00:19:51,487 --> 00:19:52,588 Hi. 410 00:19:52,613 --> 00:19:53,676 Hey. 411 00:19:54,469 --> 00:19:58,039 I judged how you use your body 412 00:19:58,064 --> 00:20:00,641 while I was asking if I could use it, too. 413 00:20:01,496 --> 00:20:02,497 Okay. 414 00:20:02,522 --> 00:20:03,873 I thought I was just choosing you. 415 00:20:03,898 --> 00:20:07,648 It didn't even occur to me that you have to choose me, too. 416 00:20:08,490 --> 00:20:09,524 Okay. 417 00:20:09,591 --> 00:20:12,294 I'm a middle-age gay man who's trying to have a baby 418 00:20:12,319 --> 00:20:14,588 on his own, and it scares the crap out of me, 419 00:20:14,613 --> 00:20:17,579 and I need someone like you who's been through this before, 420 00:20:17,604 --> 00:20:20,740 'cause I don't know what the hell I'm doing. 421 00:20:23,966 --> 00:20:25,567 Okay. 422 00:20:27,222 --> 00:20:29,825 Really? Like, okay, okay? 423 00:20:29,850 --> 00:20:32,353 Well, it took a lot for you to come all the way back here 424 00:20:32,378 --> 00:20:34,680 and say all of that, so, yeah. 425 00:20:34,705 --> 00:20:36,594 I want to help you become a father. 426 00:20:37,613 --> 00:20:39,081 Thank you, Jenny. 427 00:20:39,235 --> 00:20:42,116 - Can I hug you? - Got to tip big for the hug. 428 00:20:42,141 --> 00:20:44,510 Of course. 429 00:20:44,535 --> 00:20:45,903 - Joking, joking, joking. - Joking. You're joking. 430 00:20:45,928 --> 00:20:47,863 You're joking. Okay. 431 00:20:48,130 --> 00:20:51,292 What... What does this make us now? 432 00:20:51,317 --> 00:20:52,401 Friends? Family? 433 00:20:52,426 --> 00:20:54,945 Co-founders of a startup? I can't... 434 00:20:55,630 --> 00:20:58,166 It makes us two people 435 00:20:58,191 --> 00:21:01,027 about to do something really incredible together. 436 00:21:02,391 --> 00:21:03,626 Yeah. 437 00:21:03,651 --> 00:21:04,752 Well, three if you count the cleaning lady 438 00:21:04,777 --> 00:21:06,078 that starts on Monday. 439 00:21:06,103 --> 00:21:08,339 That's my nonjudgmental gift to you. 440 00:21:08,504 --> 00:21:09,766 I think that's more of a gift to you. 441 00:21:09,791 --> 00:21:11,793 Fair enough.