1 00:00:04,439 --> 00:00:06,529 [ Man ] One, two! One, two, three! 2 00:00:35,252 --> 00:00:38,042 [ Man ] Shatner's log: air date, unknown. 3 00:00:38,167 --> 00:00:40,257 The impossible has happened. 4 00:00:40,387 --> 00:00:44,037 It would take days to recount the events I've witnessed. 5 00:00:44,173 --> 00:00:46,923 So, settle in. It all began-- 6 00:00:47,046 --> 00:00:50,046 Quiet, you! This court-martial is now in session. 7 00:00:50,179 --> 00:00:52,919 The honorably sexy Zapp Branigan residing. 8 00:00:53,052 --> 00:00:54,922 Bring in the accused. 9 00:00:57,274 --> 00:00:59,414 - [ All Gasping ] - Oh, my. 10 00:00:59,536 --> 00:01:02,316 Philip J. Fry, you stand accused... 11 00:01:02,453 --> 00:01:05,283 of traveling to the forbidden planet Omega 3, 12 00:01:05,412 --> 00:01:08,982 a crime punishable by 12 concurrent death sentences. 13 00:01:09,111 --> 00:01:13,121 - Do you understand the charges? - One beep for "yes," two beeps for "no." 14 00:01:13,246 --> 00:01:17,026 - [ Beeps Once ] - Yes. So noted. Do you plead guilty? 15 00:01:17,164 --> 00:01:21,344 - [ Beeps Twice ] - Double yes. Guilty! 16 00:01:21,472 --> 00:01:24,212 I will now carry out the sentence. Kif, my gun. 17 00:01:24,344 --> 00:01:26,174 Wait! He pled "not guilty." 18 00:01:26,302 --> 00:01:28,352 Order! Order in the court! 19 00:01:28,478 --> 00:01:33,528 Very well then, Mr. Fry. Please recount the events that led you to be guilty. 20 00:01:33,658 --> 00:01:36,178 [ Rapid Beeping ] 21 00:01:41,796 --> 00:01:45,366 [ Leela ] The professor said he was taking a brief nap, so we only have time for six movies. 22 00:01:45,496 --> 00:01:48,586 Let's take these six Jim Carrey movies and record over them! 23 00:01:48,716 --> 00:01:53,286 You know what six movies average out to be really good? The first six Star Trekmovies! 24 00:01:53,417 --> 00:01:57,117 - [ All Gasping ] - Everybody hit the deck! 25 00:01:57,246 --> 00:01:59,336 Shh! Those words are forbidden. 26 00:01:59,466 --> 00:02:02,116 - What words? Star Trek? - [ Alarm Sounding ] 27 00:02:02,251 --> 00:02:04,821 Shh!Shut your gills! 28 00:02:04,950 --> 00:02:08,220 [ Siren Wailing ]That sound. It's patrol car 718! Hide him! 29 00:02:13,263 --> 00:02:15,133 ♪♪ [ Scatting ] 30 00:02:16,484 --> 00:02:18,144 [ Rapid Beeping ] 31 00:02:18,268 --> 00:02:20,138 The court is intrigued. 32 00:02:20,270 --> 00:02:22,930 Perhaps we could hear more about these forbidden words... 33 00:02:23,055 --> 00:02:26,615 from someone with a sexily seductive voice. 34 00:02:26,754 --> 00:02:30,854 With pleasure. You see, the show was banned after theStar Trek wars. 35 00:02:30,975 --> 00:02:33,275 You mean the vast migration of Star Warsfans? 36 00:02:33,413 --> 00:02:36,033 Uh, no. That was the Star Warstrek. 37 00:02:38,375 --> 00:02:40,855 By the 23rd century, Star Trekfandom... 38 00:02:40,985 --> 00:02:45,295 had evolved from a loose association of nerds with skin problems... 39 00:02:45,425 --> 00:02:47,815 into a full-blown religion. 40 00:02:47,949 --> 00:02:50,819 And Scotty beamed them to the Klingon ship... 41 00:02:50,953 --> 00:02:53,173 where they would be no Tribble at all. 42 00:02:53,302 --> 00:02:56,392 All power to the engines. 43 00:02:56,524 --> 00:02:59,184 [ Nichelle Nichols ] As country after country fell under its influence, 44 00:02:59,308 --> 00:03:02,918 world leaders became threatened by the movement's power. 45 00:03:03,051 --> 00:03:05,231 And so the Trekkies were executed... 46 00:03:05,359 --> 00:03:07,929 in the manner most befitting virgins. 47 00:03:08,056 --> 00:03:10,226 Whoa!He's dead, Jim. 48 00:03:10,364 --> 00:03:13,894 He's dead, Jim. He's dead, Jim. 49 00:03:14,019 --> 00:03:16,979 Finally, the sacred texts were banned. 50 00:03:18,545 --> 00:03:22,455 [ George Takei ] The last copies of the 79 episodes and six movies... 51 00:03:22,592 --> 00:03:26,342 were dumped on the forbidden world Omega 3, 52 00:03:26,466 --> 00:03:30,946 along with that blooper reel where the door doesn't close all the way. 53 00:03:31,079 --> 00:03:34,339 Thus, Star Trekwas forever scoured from human memory. 54 00:03:34,474 --> 00:03:38,444 Another classic science-fiction show canceled before its time. 55 00:03:38,566 --> 00:03:41,306 Tsk, tsk, tsk. I've never heard of such a brutal... 56 00:03:41,437 --> 00:03:44,437 and shocking injustice that I cared so little about. 57 00:03:44,572 --> 00:03:48,442 Next witness!Bender the Robot, please take the stand. 58 00:03:49,706 --> 00:03:52,536 She's all yours, buddy. 59 00:03:52,667 --> 00:03:55,407 I'd only met the defendant, Fry, once, 60 00:03:55,538 --> 00:03:57,538 but I knew he was up to no good. 61 00:03:57,671 --> 00:04:00,411 - Please use the beeps. - Oh! 62 00:04:00,544 --> 00:04:02,424 [ Rapid Beeping ] 63 00:04:04,592 --> 00:04:08,772 Mr. Nimoy! I came as soon as I heard what happened centuries ago. 64 00:04:08,900 --> 00:04:10,770 I can't believe your show was banned. 65 00:04:10,901 --> 00:04:14,211 I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about. 66 00:04:14,341 --> 00:04:16,261 [ Clicking, Whirring ] 67 00:04:16,386 --> 00:04:19,206 You know-- 1966? 68 00:04:19,346 --> 00:04:21,776 Seventy-nine episodes? About 30 good ones? 69 00:04:21,913 --> 00:04:26,183 Oh, really. I've done too many things to remember one particular TV series. 70 00:04:26,309 --> 00:04:28,359 But if-if you want to discuss my books of poetry-- 71 00:04:28,485 --> 00:04:32,355 Come on! Remember that episode where you got high on spores and smacked Kirk around? 72 00:04:32,488 --> 00:04:37,008 No. Perhaps you're thinking of my one-man show about Vincent van Spock. 73 00:04:37,146 --> 00:04:39,446 I-I-I mean van Gogh. Damn! 74 00:04:39,582 --> 00:04:41,372 Aha! You can't escape it. 75 00:04:41,497 --> 00:04:44,497 [ Sobbing ] Oh, you're right. 76 00:04:44,632 --> 00:04:46,812 I can't. 77 00:04:46,937 --> 00:04:49,987 Uh-- Geez, don't get upset. 78 00:04:50,115 --> 00:04:52,195 I mean, okay, I outwitted you, but-- 79 00:04:52,334 --> 00:04:55,214 No. It's my fellow cast members. 80 00:04:55,338 --> 00:04:58,778 Three hundred years ago, they left Earth behind. 81 00:05:02,605 --> 00:05:05,565 This planet doesn't appreciate us anymore, Leonard. 82 00:05:05,696 --> 00:05:10,266 Bill, you are, and always shall be, my friend. 83 00:05:10,396 --> 00:05:13,006 But I just signed a six-month lease on my apartment. 84 00:05:13,137 --> 00:05:15,357 I can't walk away from a commitment like that. 85 00:05:15,488 --> 00:05:18,098 Farewell, my friend. 86 00:05:18,230 --> 00:05:20,450 Oh! 87 00:05:27,588 --> 00:05:31,808 [ Sobbing ] Why did the world turn its back on our obvious greatness? 88 00:05:31,939 --> 00:05:34,419 I'm literally angry with rage! 89 00:05:34,550 --> 00:05:36,420 Your costars may be gone, 90 00:05:36,552 --> 00:05:39,562 but we can still get those episode tapes back for the whole world to see! 91 00:05:39,687 --> 00:05:41,557 Come on![ Groans ] 92 00:05:41,689 --> 00:05:43,429 Yes! Front row! 93 00:05:48,521 --> 00:05:51,001 You can't go to Omega 3! 94 00:05:51,132 --> 00:05:53,222 It's forbidden! I forbid you! 95 00:05:53,353 --> 00:05:56,833 But we have to! The world needs Star Trekto give people hope for the future! 96 00:05:56,965 --> 00:05:59,445 But it's set 800 years in the past. 97 00:05:59,576 --> 00:06:01,356 Yeah! Why is this so important to you? 98 00:06:01,490 --> 00:06:03,450 'Cause it-- it taught me so much. 99 00:06:03,579 --> 00:06:05,579 Like how you should accept people, 100 00:06:05,713 --> 00:06:09,933 whether they be black, white, Klingon, or even female. 101 00:06:10,064 --> 00:06:13,504 But most importantly, when I didn't have any friends, 102 00:06:13,634 --> 00:06:15,684 it-it made me feel like maybe I did. 103 00:06:15,810 --> 00:06:19,330 Well, that is touchingly pathetic. 104 00:06:19,466 --> 00:06:21,246 I guess I can't let you go alone. 105 00:06:21,380 --> 00:06:25,600 I'll go too-- with Leonard's permission, of course. 106 00:06:29,692 --> 00:06:32,172 We're entering the Omega system. [ Alarm Sounds ] 107 00:06:32,303 --> 00:06:35,313 [ Female Voice ] Warning. You are now in forbidden space. 108 00:06:35,437 --> 00:06:37,397 Forbidden, schur-schmidden. 109 00:06:37,526 --> 00:06:39,176 What are they gonna do, write a letter? 110 00:06:39,310 --> 00:06:41,400 Ooh, I'm so scared. 111 00:06:41,531 --> 00:06:43,311 [ Alarm Sounding ]I've lost control of the ship! 112 00:06:43,446 --> 00:06:45,666 [ Babbling ] Lost control of the ship! 113 00:06:58,591 --> 00:07:01,121 [ Gasps ]Oh, dip! 114 00:07:01,245 --> 00:07:02,985 Dip, indeed. 115 00:07:08,557 --> 00:07:10,727 [ Fry ] It's all stuff from that forbidden show. 116 00:07:10,865 --> 00:07:14,605 So many cardboard sets. So many memories. 117 00:07:14,737 --> 00:07:16,957 If only the others-- [ William Shatner ] I guess that's my cue. 118 00:07:18,915 --> 00:07:21,085 - Bill! - L-Dog! 119 00:07:21,223 --> 00:07:23,313 Hey! This is wonderful!Oh, man. 120 00:07:23,442 --> 00:07:27,012 I feel like hugging you.Well, I would, except you have no body. 121 00:07:27,141 --> 00:07:29,971 And we're both men. 122 00:07:30,100 --> 00:07:33,450 [ Nimoy ] Nichelle! George! Walter! 123 00:07:33,582 --> 00:07:35,762 DeForrest! Welshie! 124 00:07:35,889 --> 00:07:40,589 - Welshie? - We did some musical reunion specials in the 2200s. 125 00:07:40,721 --> 00:07:43,251 But the guy who played Scotty had trouble yodeling. 126 00:07:43,375 --> 00:07:46,675 Ever since then, Welshie has been a welcome participant... 127 00:07:46,814 --> 00:07:48,474 in our escapades. 128 00:07:48,598 --> 00:07:50,728 Aye! [ Speaking Gibberish ] 129 00:07:50,860 --> 00:07:53,600 I can't believe it! How'd you all end up here? 130 00:07:53,733 --> 00:07:57,563 We were on our way to Welshie's cousin's house to stay in the guest room... 131 00:07:57,694 --> 00:08:02,054 when our ship was pulled down to this planet and crashed, just like yours. 132 00:08:03,569 --> 00:08:05,179 When we woke up, we had these bodies. 133 00:08:05,310 --> 00:08:07,920 - Say it in Russian. - [ Groans ] 134 00:08:08,052 --> 00:08:10,972 Ven vee voke up, vee had these wah-dies. 135 00:08:11,098 --> 00:08:13,358 Eee! Now say nuclear "wessels"! 136 00:08:13,492 --> 00:08:15,582 - No! - We love it here. 137 00:08:15,711 --> 00:08:18,501 Everything is provided for us, and we never age. 138 00:08:18,627 --> 00:08:20,587 Check out these abs. 139 00:08:20,716 --> 00:08:23,626 Yowza!But who's doing all this for you? 140 00:08:23,764 --> 00:08:26,514 You know, we never thought about it. We're famous celebrities. 141 00:08:26,636 --> 00:08:29,986 We're used to this sort of treatment. [ Male Voice ] It is I! 142 00:08:30,117 --> 00:08:33,597 - [ All Gasping ] - Whoa! What a cheesy effect! 143 00:08:33,730 --> 00:08:36,950 I'm not an effect! You doubt my power? 144 00:08:37,081 --> 00:08:39,301 I do! 145 00:08:39,431 --> 00:08:41,781 Aye![ All Gasping ] 146 00:08:41,912 --> 00:08:45,872 [ Maniacal Laughing ]Welshie! 147 00:08:53,620 --> 00:08:57,580 This court will now hear some very sensual testimony... 148 00:08:57,711 --> 00:09:00,541 from this court's ex-lover, Turanga Leela. 149 00:09:00,669 --> 00:09:02,669 Go [ Beep ] yourself. 150 00:09:02,802 --> 00:09:04,762 [ Rapid Beeping ] 151 00:09:04,892 --> 00:09:06,812 Behold another power, 152 00:09:06,937 --> 00:09:10,327 different from the one you saw earlier! 153 00:09:13,116 --> 00:09:16,766 Hey! A body! Buff, tan-- 154 00:09:16,903 --> 00:09:18,913 Yeah. This is mine, all right. 155 00:09:19,036 --> 00:09:20,776 All right, you gas. What's the deal? 156 00:09:20,908 --> 00:09:25,778 Centuries ago, the videotaped adventures of the Enterprisecrew... 157 00:09:25,913 --> 00:09:28,743 rained down upon my planet. 158 00:09:28,871 --> 00:09:31,001 Over and over I watched them, 159 00:09:31,134 --> 00:09:33,754 especially the five with the energy beings. 160 00:09:33,876 --> 00:09:38,616 I am Melllvar! Seer of the Tapes! Knower of the Episodes! 161 00:09:38,751 --> 00:09:42,631 Tremble before my encyclopedic knowledge of Star Trek! 162 00:09:42,755 --> 00:09:44,625 Tremble? I laugh. 163 00:09:44,758 --> 00:09:48,538 - Nobody knows more about Star Trekthan me! - I beg to differ! 164 00:09:50,067 --> 00:09:53,677 Long have I waited for the one who played Spock. 165 00:09:53,809 --> 00:09:56,769 At last we can begin. 166 00:09:57,683 --> 00:10:00,343 Cool! A Star Trekconvention! 167 00:10:00,469 --> 00:10:02,689 Uh-- Uh, Melllvar? Can you give us some idea... 168 00:10:02,818 --> 00:10:04,688 how long this is going to last? 169 00:10:04,821 --> 00:10:07,821 - Until time stops. - What? - You can't do this! 170 00:10:07,955 --> 00:10:10,345 Now, we have a full schedule of events. 171 00:10:10,479 --> 00:10:13,699 Uh, can people who hate Star Trek leave?Good question. 172 00:10:13,830 --> 00:10:17,620 - No. You have to stay even longer! - [ Both Grumbling ] 173 00:10:17,746 --> 00:10:19,786 [ Snoring ] 174 00:10:19,923 --> 00:10:22,753 Um-- Uh-- Sign it to Melllvar. 175 00:10:22,883 --> 00:10:24,803 Melllvar has three "L's". 176 00:10:24,927 --> 00:10:28,887 I think I've done enough conventions to know how to spell Melllvar. 177 00:10:30,716 --> 00:10:34,366 - Say "nerd"! - Nerd! 178 00:10:34,503 --> 00:10:37,073 I'm Slim Shady. 179 00:10:37,201 --> 00:10:39,601 Yes. I'm the real Shady. 180 00:10:39,725 --> 00:10:43,415 All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating. 181 00:10:43,554 --> 00:10:47,784 So, won't the real Slim Shady please stand up? 182 00:10:47,908 --> 00:10:50,348 Please stand up. Please stand up. 183 00:10:50,475 --> 00:10:53,645 How can you do a spoken-word version of a rap song? 184 00:10:53,783 --> 00:10:55,653 He found a way. 185 00:10:55,784 --> 00:11:00,664 For 100 quatloos, who did the captain maroon on Ceti Alpha Five? 186 00:11:00,789 --> 00:11:02,659 Khan! 187 00:11:02,792 --> 00:11:04,752 [ Bell Dings ]Uh, Khan? 188 00:11:04,880 --> 00:11:07,580 - Correct! - My button has broken! 189 00:11:07,710 --> 00:11:10,800 The trivia contest is ended. I now have a surprise. 190 00:11:10,931 --> 00:11:13,461 You will perform a fan script... 191 00:11:13,585 --> 00:11:15,665 written by the ultimate Trekfan! 192 00:11:15,804 --> 00:11:20,114 You have my fan script?I meant me! Melllvar's the ultimate fan! 193 00:11:20,244 --> 00:11:23,604 Oh. I was confused because the scoreboard says something different. 194 00:11:23,725 --> 00:11:26,685 [ Grumbling ] Trivia contest over! Take your scripts! 195 00:11:26,816 --> 00:11:29,636 We have limited rehearsal time. 196 00:11:29,775 --> 00:11:31,905 Now, I didn't make enough copies of the script, 197 00:11:32,038 --> 00:11:35,168 so George and Walter will have to share. 198 00:11:35,302 --> 00:11:40,052 Uh-- You probably don't want us to see you rehearsing, or it'll give away the ending. 199 00:11:40,177 --> 00:11:42,827 That's right! The ending must not be ruined! 200 00:11:42,962 --> 00:11:44,662 - We'll go wait in the ship. - Okay. 201 00:11:44,790 --> 00:11:47,490 Not till I get my 600 quatloos! 202 00:11:50,927 --> 00:11:53,447 This is wrong. We shouldn't have abandoned them there. 203 00:11:53,581 --> 00:11:55,581 I don't know. I'm feelin' pretty good about it. 204 00:11:55,715 --> 00:11:58,975 I didn't want to leave them either, Fry. But what were we supposed to do? 205 00:11:59,109 --> 00:12:02,719 Well, usually on the show, someone would come up with a complicated plan, 206 00:12:02,851 --> 00:12:04,721 then explain it with a simple analogy. 207 00:12:04,854 --> 00:12:08,864 Hmm. If we can reroute engine power through the primary weapons... 208 00:12:08,989 --> 00:12:11,689 and reconfigure them to Melllvar's frequency, 209 00:12:11,817 --> 00:12:14,037 that should overload his electro-quantum structure. 210 00:12:14,168 --> 00:12:16,518 Like putting too much air in a balloon! 211 00:12:16,648 --> 00:12:18,908 Of course! It's so simple! 212 00:12:22,044 --> 00:12:25,884 "Alas, my ship, whom I love like a woman, 213 00:12:26,005 --> 00:12:27,875 is... disabled." 214 00:12:28,008 --> 00:12:31,268 - Oh, Lord. - "Fascinating, Captain. 215 00:12:31,402 --> 00:12:34,012 And logical too. Yet we need some help." 216 00:12:34,144 --> 00:12:37,714 "Look, Captain. Melllvar will help us." 217 00:12:41,282 --> 00:12:44,462 "Captain, I wope he will welp our vessel." 218 00:12:44,588 --> 00:12:46,198 - Wessel! - [ Shuddering ] 219 00:12:46,330 --> 00:12:50,680 - You're not acting hard enough! - Melllvar, you have to respect your actors. 220 00:12:50,812 --> 00:12:53,862 When I directed Star Trek IV, I got a magnificent performance out of Bill... 221 00:12:53,990 --> 00:12:55,860 because I respected him so much. 222 00:12:55,991 --> 00:12:57,861 And when I directed Star Trek V, 223 00:12:57,994 --> 00:13:02,004 I got a magnificent performance out of me because I respected me so much. 224 00:13:05,567 --> 00:13:09,267 Okay! I'm done "recafoobelling" the energy-motron! 225 00:13:09,397 --> 00:13:11,267 Or whatever! 226 00:13:11,399 --> 00:13:13,489 Fire! 227 00:13:16,883 --> 00:13:21,503 "My, what a handsome energy creature you are. 228 00:13:21,625 --> 00:13:23,975 I love you." 229 00:13:24,106 --> 00:13:27,276 [ Screaming ]Hey, you wrote it! 230 00:13:31,027 --> 00:13:34,377 [ Groans ] 231 00:13:34,509 --> 00:13:37,289 It's not working! He's drawing strength from our weapons! 232 00:13:37,424 --> 00:13:39,824 Like a balloon, and... something bad happens! 233 00:13:40,907 --> 00:13:43,257 [ Shouting ] 234 00:13:43,386 --> 00:13:46,036 [ Both Screaming ] 235 00:13:57,357 --> 00:14:00,317 [ Bender ] Yep. 236 00:14:00,447 --> 00:14:02,617 So, uh, how's rehearsal going? 237 00:14:02,754 --> 00:14:06,854 Lousy. Here I've been admiring a bunch of actors, while you, 238 00:14:06,975 --> 00:14:10,845 a crew of genuine space heroes, risked your lives to save them. 239 00:14:10,980 --> 00:14:13,110 Hey, we've done heroic things too. 240 00:14:13,243 --> 00:14:15,863 Yeah. In the third season, I kissed Shatner. 241 00:14:15,985 --> 00:14:19,505 Silence! My whole world has turned upside down. 242 00:14:19,640 --> 00:14:21,510 I have but one option. 243 00:14:21,643 --> 00:14:23,953 - Keep them and let us go? - No! 244 00:14:24,080 --> 00:14:27,650 To determine who is more worthy of my fanatical devotion, 245 00:14:27,778 --> 00:14:32,218 I shall pit you against each other in armed combat... to the death! 246 00:14:34,090 --> 00:14:36,220 Where'd you get an idiotic idea like that? 247 00:14:36,352 --> 00:14:40,012 Episodes 19, 46, 56 and 77! 248 00:14:40,139 --> 00:14:44,929 Great list. Except you forgot episode 66. [ Chuckling ] 249 00:14:45,057 --> 00:14:47,577 [ Stammering ] I was getting to that one! 250 00:14:47,711 --> 00:14:49,891 [ Shouting ] 251 00:14:57,808 --> 00:15:00,678 So Melllvar ordered a battle to the death. 252 00:15:00,812 --> 00:15:03,252 - I assume no one survived? - [ Sighs ] 253 00:15:03,379 --> 00:15:06,119 Can we get on with this? My foot's getting tired. 254 00:15:06,253 --> 00:15:08,083 [ Beeping ] 255 00:15:09,211 --> 00:15:12,131 This will be your standard battle to the death. 256 00:15:12,259 --> 00:15:15,349 The only weapons-- whatever you can find. 257 00:15:15,479 --> 00:15:17,649 But I warn you. Do nothing... 258 00:15:17,786 --> 00:15:20,266 until I have signaled the start of combat. 259 00:15:21,398 --> 00:15:24,008 Okay, start.[ All Gasping, Shouting ] 260 00:15:24,139 --> 00:15:26,399 [ Wind Howling ] 261 00:15:30,885 --> 00:15:34,105 I don't have much experience at fighting, except with you guys. 262 00:15:34,236 --> 00:15:37,456 I have an idea. Wasn't there an episode where I threw my shoe at the enemy? 263 00:15:37,587 --> 00:15:40,677 - You mean Doohan? - [ Both Chuckling ] 264 00:15:40,808 --> 00:15:43,418 Whoever it was, I did it like this. Yaah! 265 00:15:43,551 --> 00:15:47,121 - Ow! - My foot's cold. 266 00:15:48,643 --> 00:15:50,863 There. We can make these into spears. 267 00:15:50,993 --> 00:15:54,613 And we can tie these caterpillars together to make bow strings for bows and arrows. 268 00:15:54,735 --> 00:15:56,905 And we can use this machine gun to shoot them! 269 00:15:57,043 --> 00:15:59,223 Yee-haw! 270 00:16:04,049 --> 00:16:06,049 [ Clicking ] 271 00:16:06,182 --> 00:16:08,842 [ Laughing ] That was fun. 272 00:16:10,273 --> 00:16:13,973 What if I distract them with my famous fan dance? 273 00:16:14,102 --> 00:16:16,152 Oh, that's good, good, good, good. And then, George, 274 00:16:16,278 --> 00:16:19,538 you give them a karate chop.I find that offensive. 275 00:16:19,673 --> 00:16:24,503 Just because I'm of Japanese ancestry, you assume I know karate. 276 00:16:24,634 --> 00:16:28,294 Have I ever led you to believe I have studied karate? 277 00:16:28,422 --> 00:16:30,992 Well, no. But you never talk about yourself. 278 00:16:31,120 --> 00:16:34,640 Maybe if you showed a little interest. 279 00:16:34,775 --> 00:16:36,645 Well, here goes nothing. 280 00:16:37,996 --> 00:16:40,216 [ Screaming ] 281 00:16:44,003 --> 00:16:46,003 Hello, boys. 282 00:16:48,136 --> 00:16:50,566 Whoa! 283 00:16:50,705 --> 00:16:53,005 Hyah![ Shouting ] 284 00:16:54,230 --> 00:16:56,230 Aah![ Gasps ] 285 00:16:56,363 --> 00:16:59,503 - There's no right way to hit a woman. - Then do it the wrong way. 286 00:16:59,626 --> 00:17:03,016 Fine. Yeee-oh-ho! 287 00:17:03,152 --> 00:17:06,682 - Is that all you got? Hyah! - [ Groaning ] 288 00:17:17,384 --> 00:17:18,824 Come on, Walter!Take that! 289 00:17:20,125 --> 00:17:23,605 [ Whooping ][ Groaning ] It hurts. 290 00:17:23,738 --> 00:17:27,128 Let's see if this actually works. [ Grunts ] 291 00:17:28,047 --> 00:17:31,177 Ow! Ow! Ow!Aah! My face! 292 00:17:31,310 --> 00:17:33,100 [ Groans ] My face too! 293 00:17:34,140 --> 00:17:36,060 May I? 294 00:17:36,184 --> 00:17:38,064 - Hyah! - [ Groans ] 295 00:17:40,232 --> 00:17:43,502 Excellent. Excellent. 296 00:17:43,626 --> 00:17:47,146 Leela, please. This is exactly what Melllvar wants. 297 00:17:47,282 --> 00:17:50,422 We're just pawns in his diabolical game of checkers. 298 00:17:50,547 --> 00:17:53,417 Can't we resolve our differences some other way? 299 00:17:53,549 --> 00:17:56,809 Melllvar! Dinnertime! 300 00:17:56,944 --> 00:18:00,214 Aw, but, Mom! I'm playin' with my collectibles! 301 00:18:00,383 --> 00:18:03,733 Now![ Groans ] 302 00:18:03,865 --> 00:18:07,215 All this time, we thought he was a powerful super-being. 303 00:18:07,346 --> 00:18:12,306 - Yet he was just a child. - He's not a child! He's 34! 304 00:18:13,743 --> 00:18:17,233 All right, Koenig! I've wanted to do this for years! 305 00:18:17,356 --> 00:18:21,136 Bender, wait! This is our chance to escape before Melllvar comes back! 306 00:18:21,273 --> 00:18:23,843 But we all need to work together. 307 00:18:27,236 --> 00:18:30,456 I love you so much.[ Nimoy Clears Throat ] Hello. 308 00:18:30,586 --> 00:18:33,546 We've decided to work together.Yeah, so did they. 309 00:18:33,676 --> 00:18:35,976 Now, how do we escape? 310 00:18:36,115 --> 00:18:37,985 We can't use our ship. 311 00:18:38,116 --> 00:18:40,246 We have life support, but the engines are wrecked. 312 00:18:40,380 --> 00:18:45,120 Ironic, because our engines work, but our life support systems don't. 313 00:18:45,253 --> 00:18:49,303 Hey. If your engines work--And your life support systems work-- 314 00:18:49,432 --> 00:18:51,432 Stop! You're just goin' around in circles! 315 00:18:51,565 --> 00:18:54,825 Think, Fry. Think. Everyone's depending on you. 316 00:19:03,445 --> 00:19:07,275 We're too heavy! You guys need to lose some weight. Fast! 317 00:19:11,366 --> 00:19:13,846 Fish. 318 00:19:13,978 --> 00:19:16,418 Look! Leonard! We're light enough to keep the tapes! 319 00:19:16,546 --> 00:19:20,026 Isn't that great?I'm living in a gefilte fish jar. 320 00:19:23,162 --> 00:19:25,252 We did it![ All Cheering ] 321 00:19:27,165 --> 00:19:30,815 [ Melllvar Chuckling Evilly ] 322 00:19:30,951 --> 00:19:34,391 - [ All Shouting ] - Melllvar's got a spaceship! 323 00:19:34,520 --> 00:19:36,610 Yes! In mint condition! 324 00:19:36,740 --> 00:19:39,180 And you made me take it out of the package! 325 00:19:45,705 --> 00:19:48,265 The Nimbus! We're saved! 326 00:19:48,403 --> 00:19:52,283 You're under arrest. Prepare to be boarded. 327 00:19:52,407 --> 00:19:55,057 So I boarded you, huh? Uh, what happened next? 328 00:19:55,193 --> 00:19:57,283 You started this stupid court-martial! 329 00:19:57,413 --> 00:19:59,553 Now if you don't mind, we're still fighting Melllvar. 330 00:20:02,940 --> 00:20:05,120 [ All Panting ] 331 00:20:10,338 --> 00:20:13,208 - [ All Gasping ] - One more hit, and we're done for! 332 00:20:13,342 --> 00:20:16,652 Let's take him out with us. Do you guys have a self-destruct code? 333 00:20:16,779 --> 00:20:21,219 Like destruct sequence 1-A, 2-B, 3-- 334 00:20:21,349 --> 00:20:24,309 Thanks a lot, Takei! Now everybody knows! 335 00:20:24,440 --> 00:20:28,750 If I can't have the original cast of Star Trek, no one will! 336 00:20:28,878 --> 00:20:30,748 Prepare to die! 337 00:20:30,881 --> 00:20:33,801 Wait! If they mean that much to you, why do you want to kill them? 338 00:20:33,927 --> 00:20:36,577 Because I-- I-- 339 00:20:36,712 --> 00:20:38,802 I don't know what I'd do without them. 340 00:20:38,932 --> 00:20:42,372 Melllvar, you can't let a TV show be your whole life. 341 00:20:42,501 --> 00:20:45,201 You can do anything you want. Look at Walter Koenig. 342 00:20:45,330 --> 00:20:47,250 After Star Trek, he became an actor. 343 00:20:47,375 --> 00:20:50,415 Not just an actor but a well-rounded person... 344 00:20:50,552 --> 00:20:53,252 with my own friends and credit cards and keys. 345 00:20:53,382 --> 00:20:57,432 Well, I... guess I could move out of my parents' basement. 346 00:20:57,559 --> 00:21:00,609 - Maybe get a temp job. - Whoa, whoa. One step at a time. 347 00:21:00,737 --> 00:21:02,777 I thank you, Fry. 348 00:21:02,913 --> 00:21:05,573 You know, you and I are of a kind. 349 00:21:05,699 --> 00:21:09,309 In a different reality, I could have called you... friend. 350 00:21:09,442 --> 00:21:12,272 Episode 10. "Balance of Terror." 351 00:21:12,401 --> 00:21:14,581 More like episode nine, loser! 352 00:21:14,708 --> 00:21:17,228 In your face! Victory is mine! 353 00:21:17,363 --> 00:21:19,323 [ Taunting Laughter ] 354 00:21:20,583 --> 00:21:22,503 I wonder, my friends. 355 00:21:22,628 --> 00:21:25,278 Was he really such an evil energy gas? 356 00:21:25,413 --> 00:21:27,763 He did give us eternal youth. 357 00:21:27,894 --> 00:21:29,774 Twenty-four hour Laundromat. 358 00:21:29,896 --> 00:21:33,986 A full assortment of rum, both spiced and regular. 359 00:21:34,117 --> 00:21:36,247 Truly, it was a paradise. 360 00:21:36,382 --> 00:21:40,432 And all you had to put up with was one really annoying Star Trekfan. 361 00:21:41,560 --> 00:21:43,430 Let's get the hell out of here.