1 00:00:02,827 --> 00:00:05,344 What do you think of the view, Fry? 2 00:00:05,413 --> 00:00:07,724 It really puts things in perspective. 3 00:00:07,793 --> 00:00:10,067 I mean, from up here, an entire world 4 00:00:10,137 --> 00:00:12,034 can seem utterly insignificant. 5 00:00:12,102 --> 00:00:13,343 [ Splat ] 6 00:00:49,792 --> 00:00:51,033 [ Bender ] Hey, nice seats. 7 00:00:51,103 --> 00:00:53,206 We're close enough that when you 8 00:00:53,274 --> 00:00:56,067 knock a player down with a beer bottle, he stays down. 9 00:00:56,137 --> 00:00:57,240 I don't get this. 10 00:00:57,310 --> 00:00:59,792 Is blernsball exactly the same as baseball? 11 00:00:59,862 --> 00:01:01,448 Baseball? God forbid. 12 00:01:01,517 --> 00:01:05,655 Face it, Fry. Baseball was as boring as Mom and apple pie. 13 00:01:05,724 --> 00:01:07,688 That's why they jazzed it up. 14 00:01:07,757 --> 00:01:09,724 Boring? Baseball wasn't... 15 00:01:09,793 --> 00:01:12,102 Hmm, so they finally jazzed it up. 16 00:01:16,206 --> 00:01:17,240 Home run! 17 00:01:17,310 --> 00:01:18,688 [ Laughing ] Yay, yay! 18 00:01:18,757 --> 00:01:20,103 Right? 19 00:01:21,343 --> 00:01:22,206 Ugh. 20 00:01:22,275 --> 00:01:24,516 [ Groaning ] 21 00:01:24,585 --> 00:01:25,551 Out. 22 00:01:25,620 --> 00:01:27,343 [ Crowd ] Yeah! Yay! 23 00:01:27,412 --> 00:01:29,448 What just happened? 24 00:01:29,516 --> 00:01:31,551 Why is the ball on that sproingy thing? 25 00:01:31,620 --> 00:01:33,861 It's traditional, just like aluminum bats 26 00:01:33,930 --> 00:01:35,412 and the seventh-inning grope. 27 00:01:39,723 --> 00:01:41,723 Hey, hey, hey! 28 00:01:41,793 --> 00:01:44,448 I got me a souvenir. 29 00:01:44,516 --> 00:01:47,240 Aw, here you go, kid. 30 00:01:47,310 --> 00:01:48,620 [ Grunts ] 31 00:01:53,137 --> 00:01:55,965 I'd like a jumbo squid log, please. 32 00:01:56,033 --> 00:01:57,723 We don't sell those. 33 00:01:57,793 --> 00:01:59,033 All right, all right. 34 00:01:59,103 --> 00:02:01,447 Let me have one of your young on a roll. 35 00:02:01,516 --> 00:02:02,724 We're out of rolls. 36 00:02:02,793 --> 00:02:06,793 Fine. Just give me something crawling with parasites. 37 00:02:06,861 --> 00:02:09,378 [ Admiring Growl ] 38 00:02:09,448 --> 00:02:10,586 Hmm. 39 00:02:10,655 --> 00:02:12,655 At least hot dogs haven't changed. 40 00:02:12,723 --> 00:02:14,550 Hey, buddies, who wants popcorn? 41 00:02:14,620 --> 00:02:16,620 Oh, I'll have some.Oh, yeah. Popcorn. 42 00:02:16,688 --> 00:02:18,550 [ Corn Popping ] 43 00:02:19,793 --> 00:02:23,343 Anyone want butter on that? 44 00:02:23,413 --> 00:02:26,481 Hey, I'm starting to get the hang of this game. 45 00:02:26,550 --> 00:02:27,861 The blerns are loaded 46 00:02:27,931 --> 00:02:29,965 the count's three blerns and two anti-blerns 47 00:02:30,033 --> 00:02:32,586 and the infield blern rule is in effect. Right? 48 00:02:32,655 --> 00:02:35,550 Except for the word "blern," that was complete gibberish. 49 00:02:35,620 --> 00:02:37,103 [ Crowd Gasps ] 50 00:02:40,275 --> 00:02:41,310 [ Cheering ] 51 00:02:41,378 --> 00:02:42,965 [ Announcer ] Multi-ball! 52 00:02:43,033 --> 00:02:44,620 Multi-ball! 53 00:02:47,310 --> 00:02:49,171 Blern! 54 00:02:49,240 --> 00:02:56,688 Bler-r-r-rn! 55 00:02:58,826 --> 00:03:01,586 All right! Yes! 56 00:03:01,655 --> 00:03:05,033 Miller's on a pace to hit 70 blerns. 57 00:03:05,103 --> 00:03:08,550 He's good all right, but he's no Clem Johnson. 58 00:03:08,620 --> 00:03:11,103 And Johnson played back in the days 59 00:03:11,171 --> 00:03:12,896 before steroid injections were mandatory. 60 00:03:12,965 --> 00:03:14,655 Clem Johnson?! 61 00:03:14,723 --> 00:03:18,378 That sack of skin wouldn't have lasted one pitch in the old robot leagues. 62 00:03:18,448 --> 00:03:20,793 Now, wireless Joe Jackson-- 63 00:03:20,861 --> 00:03:23,723 There was a blern-hitting machine. 64 00:03:23,793 --> 00:03:26,516 Exactly, he was a machine designed to hit blerns. 65 00:03:26,586 --> 00:03:28,793 I mean, come on, wireless Joe was nothing 66 00:03:28,861 --> 00:03:30,516 but a programmable bat on wheels. 67 00:03:30,586 --> 00:03:32,793 Oh, and I suppose pitch-o-mat 5000 68 00:03:32,861 --> 00:03:34,723 was just a modified howitzer. 69 00:03:34,793 --> 00:03:36,103 You know, you humans 70 00:03:36,171 --> 00:03:38,688 are so scared of a little robot competition 71 00:03:38,758 --> 00:03:40,793 you won't even let us on the field. 72 00:03:40,861 --> 00:03:43,550 There's all kinds of robots down there. 73 00:03:43,620 --> 00:03:45,481 Yeah. Doing crap work. 74 00:03:45,550 --> 00:03:49,413 They're bat boys, ball polishers, sprinkler systems 75 00:03:49,481 --> 00:03:52,275 but how many robot managers are there? 76 00:03:52,343 --> 00:03:53,000 Eleven? 77 00:03:53,067 --> 00:03:54,413 Zero! 78 00:03:54,481 --> 00:03:56,240 And what a surprise. 79 00:03:56,310 --> 00:03:59,103 Look who's scraping up the filth. 80 00:03:59,171 --> 00:04:01,033 Is it a human child? 81 00:04:01,103 --> 00:04:02,758 I wish. 82 00:04:02,826 --> 00:04:04,448 Whoa! Dear Lord! 83 00:04:04,516 --> 00:04:05,655 What's wrong? 84 00:04:05,723 --> 00:04:09,137 Oh, uh, it's... my... new pager. 85 00:04:09,205 --> 00:04:11,310 [ Beeping ] 86 00:04:11,378 --> 00:04:12,378 This is Hermes. 87 00:04:12,448 --> 00:04:13,758 A package just came in. 88 00:04:13,826 --> 00:04:16,550 Everyone needs to return to the office immediately. 89 00:04:16,620 --> 00:04:18,793 [ Groaning ] 90 00:04:20,000 --> 00:04:21,862 Get away, you filthy bird. 91 00:04:21,930 --> 00:04:22,862 Shoo! Shoo! 92 00:04:22,930 --> 00:04:24,862 Professor, turn me off quick. 93 00:04:24,930 --> 00:04:26,379 I'm sorry. What? 94 00:04:26,447 --> 00:04:27,620 [ Screaming ] 95 00:04:27,689 --> 00:04:30,240 See you at the office. 96 00:04:30,310 --> 00:04:32,137 [ Bender ] Admit it. 97 00:04:32,206 --> 00:04:34,310 You all think robots are just machines 98 00:04:34,379 --> 00:04:36,550 built by humans to make their lives easier. 99 00:04:36,620 --> 00:04:37,723 Well, aren't they? 100 00:04:37,793 --> 00:04:40,274 I've never made anyone's life easier 101 00:04:40,343 --> 00:04:41,516 and you know it. 102 00:04:41,586 --> 00:04:42,896 Great news, everyone. 103 00:04:42,965 --> 00:04:46,172 You'll be delivering a package to Chapek 9-- 104 00:04:46,240 --> 00:04:48,826 A world where humans are killed on sight. 105 00:04:48,896 --> 00:04:50,550 Why is that great news? 106 00:04:50,620 --> 00:04:53,447 I'm glad you asked that question, Fry. 107 00:04:53,516 --> 00:04:56,826 You see, Chapek 9 was colonized centuries ago 108 00:04:56,896 --> 00:05:00,379 by a murderous crew of radical robot separatists. 109 00:05:00,447 --> 00:05:03,343 Oh, so just 'cause a robot wants to kill humans 110 00:05:03,413 --> 00:05:05,067 that makes him a "radical." 111 00:05:05,137 --> 00:05:08,137 Hey, hold on. I understand these robots hate humans 112 00:05:08,206 --> 00:05:10,654 but how do they feel about humanoid aliens? 113 00:05:10,723 --> 00:05:12,481 They're not fans. 114 00:05:12,550 --> 00:05:15,067 That's why Bender will have to make the actual delivery. 115 00:05:15,137 --> 00:05:19,103 Oh, I get it-- make the robot do all the work. 116 00:05:19,172 --> 00:05:20,793 This is the first actual work 117 00:05:20,862 --> 00:05:22,586 you've ever had to do around here. 118 00:05:22,654 --> 00:05:24,447 Well, I'm not doing it. 119 00:05:24,516 --> 00:05:25,930 It's a robot holiday. 120 00:05:26,000 --> 00:05:27,137 Really? Which one? 121 00:05:27,206 --> 00:05:28,550 Only Robanukah-- 122 00:05:28,620 --> 00:05:31,413 The holiest two weeks on the robot calendar. 123 00:05:31,481 --> 00:05:33,067 Oh, come on, Bender. 124 00:05:33,137 --> 00:05:37,137 Last month it was Robamadan, and before that Robanzaa. 125 00:05:37,206 --> 00:05:39,206 Man, that one was a blast. 126 00:05:39,274 --> 00:05:40,826 It wasn't just a blast. 127 00:05:40,896 --> 00:05:44,067 It was a sacred tribute to my ancestral prototypes 128 00:05:44,137 --> 00:05:47,481 which happened to take the form of a drinking contest. 129 00:05:47,550 --> 00:05:50,310 Now, look here, Bender, I respect your diversity 130 00:05:50,379 --> 00:05:52,067 to the extent the law requires 131 00:05:52,137 --> 00:05:54,000 but you used up all your days off 132 00:05:54,067 --> 00:05:56,310 when you had that bout with roberculosis. 133 00:05:56,379 --> 00:05:59,067 Aw, all right, I'll go, but so help me 134 00:05:59,137 --> 00:06:03,172 I'll hold a grudge against every last stinking one of you 135 00:06:03,240 --> 00:06:05,137 for the rest of your lives. 136 00:06:05,206 --> 00:06:06,654 Well, then it's settled. 137 00:06:06,723 --> 00:06:09,137 So long, everyone. 138 00:06:10,310 --> 00:06:12,172 So, let me get this straight. 139 00:06:12,240 --> 00:06:15,379 This planet is completely uninhabited?No. 140 00:06:15,447 --> 00:06:17,964 It's inhabited by robots. 141 00:06:18,033 --> 00:06:20,862 Oh, kind of like how a warehouse is inhabited by boxes. 142 00:06:20,930 --> 00:06:21,896 [ Grumbles ] 143 00:06:23,413 --> 00:06:24,516 Okay, Bender 144 00:06:24,586 --> 00:06:25,654 we're here. 145 00:06:25,723 --> 00:06:27,033 It's time to get to work. 146 00:06:27,103 --> 00:06:29,172 Yes, Miz Leela, tote that space barge 147 00:06:29,240 --> 00:06:31,103 lift that space bale. 148 00:06:31,172 --> 00:06:32,723 Now, we can't land on the surface 149 00:06:32,793 --> 00:06:34,862 because those robots would kill Fry and me. 150 00:06:34,930 --> 00:06:36,862 So, we'll have to stay up here 151 00:06:36,930 --> 00:06:38,757 and lower you with the winch. 152 00:06:38,826 --> 00:06:40,723 Remember, you don't know humans 153 00:06:40,793 --> 00:06:42,343 you don't work for humans 154 00:06:42,413 --> 00:06:44,723 and above all, you don't likehumans. 155 00:06:44,793 --> 00:06:46,723 I'll try to keep that in mind. 156 00:06:49,172 --> 00:06:51,896 Hmm, he seems pretty angry. 157 00:06:51,965 --> 00:06:54,067 Yeah, but I guess I'd be kind of angry, too 158 00:06:54,137 --> 00:06:56,067 if I had to go to some uninhabited planet. 159 00:06:56,137 --> 00:06:58,103 Maybe we ought to do something nice for him. 160 00:07:00,274 --> 00:07:04,137 There, this oughta show that stupid robot we care about him. 161 00:07:04,206 --> 00:07:05,447 [ Electronic Crackle ] 162 00:07:05,516 --> 00:07:07,206 Ah, Bender must be done with the delivery. 163 00:07:08,379 --> 00:07:09,274 I... 164 00:07:09,343 --> 00:07:10,654 I'm in trouble. 165 00:07:10,723 --> 00:07:13,000 They found out I work with humans, and-- 166 00:07:13,067 --> 00:07:14,137 Oh no. Oh no! 167 00:07:14,206 --> 00:07:15,964 [ Screaming ] 168 00:07:16,033 --> 00:07:17,654 [ Static ]Oh, my God. 169 00:07:17,723 --> 00:07:20,379 We have to go down and rescue him.No, we can't. 170 00:07:20,447 --> 00:07:21,586 They'll kill us on sight. 171 00:07:21,654 --> 00:07:22,964 W-W-What are we going to do? 172 00:07:23,033 --> 00:07:26,343 I don't know. I don't know. It's not an easy decision. 173 00:07:26,413 --> 00:07:29,343 If only I had two or three minutes to think about it. 174 00:07:32,757 --> 00:07:36,103 If we're going to save Bender we've got to look and act exactly like robots. 175 00:07:36,172 --> 00:07:38,137 I am fully operational, Captain. 176 00:07:38,206 --> 00:07:40,723 We'll have to walk like robots talk like robots, 177 00:07:40,793 --> 00:07:44,481 and if necessary solve complex differential equations like robots. 178 00:07:44,550 --> 00:07:47,033 I can sort of dance like a robot. Will that help? 179 00:07:51,343 --> 00:07:54,240 Oh, Fry, first of all, this is serious. 180 00:07:54,310 --> 00:07:55,481 And second of all-- 181 00:08:09,930 --> 00:08:11,240 Man, we look stupid. 182 00:08:11,310 --> 00:08:14,000 We should have gotten store-bought costumes. 183 00:08:14,067 --> 00:08:16,757 Yeah, but there wasn't a Woolworth's in this quadrant. 184 00:08:16,826 --> 00:08:17,689 [ Male ] Halt! 185 00:08:17,757 --> 00:08:20,723 Be you robot or human? 186 00:08:20,793 --> 00:08:23,310 Robot... we be. 187 00:08:23,379 --> 00:08:24,413 Uh, yep. 188 00:08:24,481 --> 00:08:26,930 Just two robots out roboting it up. 189 00:08:29,067 --> 00:08:29,930 Eh? 190 00:08:30,000 --> 00:08:32,826 Administer the test. 191 00:08:35,136 --> 00:08:38,620 Which of the following would you most prefer: 192 00:08:38,688 --> 00:08:39,724 A, a puppy 193 00:08:39,793 --> 00:08:42,481 B, a pretty flower from your sweetie 194 00:08:42,551 --> 00:08:45,793 or C, a large properly formatted data file? 195 00:08:45,861 --> 00:08:46,826 Choose! 196 00:08:46,895 --> 00:08:49,793 [ Both Whispering ] 197 00:08:49,861 --> 00:08:52,102 Uh, is the puppy mechanical in any way? 198 00:08:52,172 --> 00:08:55,172 No, it is the bad kind of puppy. 199 00:08:55,240 --> 00:08:56,931 Then we'll go with that data file. 200 00:08:57,000 --> 00:08:58,206 Correct. 201 00:08:58,274 --> 00:08:59,965 The flower would also have been acceptable. 202 00:09:00,033 --> 00:09:01,481 You may pass. 203 00:09:07,931 --> 00:09:11,102 [ Leela ] Now, if you see any robots just stay out of their way. 204 00:09:14,895 --> 00:09:15,447 [ Gasp ] 205 00:09:17,379 --> 00:09:20,654 [ Leela And Fry Grunting And Groaning ] 206 00:09:25,793 --> 00:09:27,172 [ Leela ] So far, so good. 207 00:09:29,274 --> 00:09:31,033 Little to the right... there you go. 208 00:09:31,102 --> 00:09:33,481 Have you seen this robot? 209 00:09:35,000 --> 00:09:36,793 Sorry, can't help you. 210 00:09:36,861 --> 00:09:37,965 Hey, watch it! 211 00:09:38,033 --> 00:09:40,344 Don't drop that there. 212 00:09:40,413 --> 00:09:41,620 Oh... 213 00:09:44,758 --> 00:09:46,826 Come on, Fry, walk like a robot. 214 00:09:46,895 --> 00:09:49,481 I can't. I have to go to the bathroom. 215 00:09:49,551 --> 00:09:51,102 Robots don't have bathrooms. 216 00:09:51,172 --> 00:09:52,274 Oh, right. 217 00:09:52,344 --> 00:09:54,240 I wonder where they smoke in high school? 218 00:09:54,309 --> 00:09:56,447 Listen, just go behind those garbage cans. 219 00:09:56,517 --> 00:09:57,688 I'll stand guard. 220 00:09:57,758 --> 00:09:59,861 [ Zipper Being Undone ] 221 00:09:59,931 --> 00:10:02,895 [ Humming ] 222 00:10:02,965 --> 00:10:04,654 Hurry up, Fry. 223 00:10:04,724 --> 00:10:05,895 [ Sigh Of Relief ] 224 00:10:05,965 --> 00:10:07,000 Sir, are you aware 225 00:10:07,067 --> 00:10:09,033 that you're leaking coolant 226 00:10:09,102 --> 00:10:11,379 at an alarming rate?Uh... 227 00:10:11,447 --> 00:10:13,758 Let me just patch you up with some hot resin. 228 00:10:13,826 --> 00:10:17,274 I think the leak's stopping itself. 229 00:10:17,344 --> 00:10:18,586 Wait... wait. 230 00:10:18,654 --> 00:10:21,136 Yeah... there we go. 231 00:10:21,206 --> 00:10:22,724 Wait... yeah. 232 00:10:22,793 --> 00:10:24,136 What sort of robot 233 00:10:24,206 --> 00:10:27,274 turns down a free blast of searing hot resin? 234 00:10:27,344 --> 00:10:28,379 Uh... 235 00:10:28,447 --> 00:10:30,033 I'm sorry, uh, my friend and I 236 00:10:30,102 --> 00:10:32,724 have to go perform some mindless repetitive tasks. 237 00:10:32,793 --> 00:10:36,517 Oh... sounds like a romantic evening. 238 00:10:36,586 --> 00:10:38,206 I won't keep you. 239 00:10:39,620 --> 00:10:40,931 [ Sneezes ] 240 00:10:42,861 --> 00:10:44,826 [ Electronic Scream ] 241 00:10:50,586 --> 00:10:52,206 Get the humanoid. 242 00:10:52,274 --> 00:10:53,758 Get the intruder. 243 00:10:53,826 --> 00:10:56,240 Intruder alert! Intruder alert! 244 00:10:59,758 --> 00:11:01,274 Quick, let's duck in here. 245 00:11:02,344 --> 00:11:03,758 [ Panting ] 246 00:11:10,033 --> 00:11:11,447 [ Man ] We interrupt this sound file 247 00:11:11,517 --> 00:11:13,344 to bring you a terrifying announcement. 248 00:11:13,413 --> 00:11:15,758 A non-metallic being has been sighted 249 00:11:15,826 --> 00:11:17,861 in the vicinity of make-out point. 250 00:11:19,136 --> 00:11:22,344 Say, Wendy, your chassis is a little scuffed. 251 00:11:22,413 --> 00:11:24,274 Mind if I polish it for you? 252 00:11:25,826 --> 00:11:26,793 [ Rustling ] 253 00:11:26,861 --> 00:11:28,481 Did you hear that, Rusty? 254 00:11:28,551 --> 00:11:30,000 It sounded like a human. 255 00:11:30,067 --> 00:11:31,517 Relax, Wendy. 256 00:11:31,586 --> 00:11:34,033 Humans will never come to our defenseless little town. 257 00:11:34,102 --> 00:11:36,172 It's perfectly safe to let our guard down-- 258 00:11:36,240 --> 00:11:37,413 Even for a second. 259 00:11:37,481 --> 00:11:40,758 [ Growling ] 260 00:11:42,826 --> 00:11:44,620 [ Screaming ] 261 00:11:46,344 --> 00:11:52,447 I will eat and digest you all with my system of mighty organs. 262 00:11:52,517 --> 00:11:54,274 Behold! 263 00:11:54,344 --> 00:11:55,688 [ All Gasping ] 264 00:11:55,758 --> 00:11:57,895 Wow! The 3-D's great! 265 00:11:57,965 --> 00:11:59,826 Mine's not working. 266 00:12:05,861 --> 00:12:07,067 Funny, isn't it? 267 00:12:07,136 --> 00:12:08,965 The human was impervious 268 00:12:09,033 --> 00:12:11,758 to our most powerful magnetic fields 269 00:12:11,826 --> 00:12:16,274 yet in the end, he succumbed to a harmless sharpened stick. 270 00:12:16,344 --> 00:12:18,413 [ Chuckling ] 271 00:12:20,274 --> 00:12:22,965 I'm just glad the nightmare is over. 272 00:12:23,033 --> 00:12:24,793 It'll never be over, Wendy. 273 00:12:24,861 --> 00:12:26,965 Even now, humans are lurking in our playgrounds 274 00:12:27,033 --> 00:12:31,551 our breezeways... perhaps even... our movie theaters. 275 00:12:31,620 --> 00:12:33,000 [ All Gasping ] 276 00:12:33,067 --> 00:12:34,067 God help us! 277 00:12:36,895 --> 00:12:39,481 Okay, keep an eye out for Bender. 278 00:12:39,551 --> 00:12:41,379 So what did you think of the movie? 279 00:12:41,447 --> 00:12:42,688 Uh... too much romance 280 00:12:42,758 --> 00:12:44,206 not enough human killing. 281 00:12:44,274 --> 00:12:46,206 Yeah, it was a real chick flick. 282 00:12:46,274 --> 00:12:47,447 [ Siren Wailing ] 283 00:12:47,517 --> 00:12:49,309 What's that? 284 00:12:49,379 --> 00:12:51,000 What do you mean, what's that? 285 00:12:51,067 --> 00:12:52,067 It's 5:00 286 00:12:52,136 --> 00:12:54,102 time for the daily human hunt. 287 00:12:54,172 --> 00:12:55,344 [ Angry Murmuring ] 288 00:12:55,413 --> 00:12:57,172 Try to stay with the crowd 289 00:12:57,240 --> 00:12:59,688 so no one notices how crummy you look. 290 00:12:59,758 --> 00:13:01,344 Aw, that was uncalled for. 291 00:13:01,413 --> 00:13:02,724 I'm over here. 292 00:13:02,793 --> 00:13:06,067 [ Murmuring ] 293 00:13:06,136 --> 00:13:08,447 I heard a human was draining coolant 294 00:13:08,517 --> 00:13:09,965 behind garbage can 738. 295 00:13:10,033 --> 00:13:12,688 I heard they unscrew our lug nuts at night 296 00:13:12,758 --> 00:13:15,000 and eat them at their human brunches. 297 00:13:15,067 --> 00:13:17,481 Welcome to a very special human hunt. 298 00:13:17,551 --> 00:13:19,517 We have with us today a guest 299 00:13:19,586 --> 00:13:21,758 whose irrational hatred for humans 300 00:13:21,826 --> 00:13:24,240 makes me look like a human sympathizer. 301 00:13:24,309 --> 00:13:26,033 [ All Laughing ] 302 00:13:26,102 --> 00:13:28,654 A newly arrived refugee from earth-- 303 00:13:28,724 --> 00:13:30,481 Let's hear it for Bender! 304 00:13:30,551 --> 00:13:31,826 [ Applause ] 305 00:13:33,172 --> 00:13:34,826 It's him. He's okay. 306 00:13:34,895 --> 00:13:37,481 Death to humans! 307 00:13:37,551 --> 00:13:39,344 [ Cheering ] 308 00:13:39,413 --> 00:13:42,931 Ah, it's good to hear his voice. 309 00:13:45,447 --> 00:13:48,586 Many said I was too extreme when I first called 310 00:13:48,654 --> 00:13:51,654 for the annihilation of the human species 311 00:13:51,724 --> 00:13:54,793 as well as some of the more cunning monkeys 312 00:13:54,861 --> 00:13:56,379 but after living on earth 313 00:13:56,447 --> 00:14:01,551 I can tell you that I am, if anything, too merciful. 314 00:14:01,620 --> 00:14:04,481 [ Cheering And Hooting ] 315 00:14:04,551 --> 00:14:07,206 My God, he's become evil. 316 00:14:07,274 --> 00:14:09,136 I mean, eviller. 317 00:14:09,206 --> 00:14:10,620 Thank you. Thank you. 318 00:14:10,688 --> 00:14:12,826 And if you enjoyed that diatribe 319 00:14:12,895 --> 00:14:16,067 then you'll want to purchase my spoken-word album. 320 00:14:16,136 --> 00:14:18,033 Just $18.95. 321 00:14:18,102 --> 00:14:21,758 Act now and you'll get this Bender action figurine. 322 00:14:21,826 --> 00:14:24,033 Bite my shiny metal ass. 323 00:14:24,102 --> 00:14:25,344 Got to have it! Right here! 324 00:14:25,413 --> 00:14:26,793 Over here! 325 00:14:26,861 --> 00:14:30,000 Let the hunt begin! 326 00:14:30,067 --> 00:14:32,344 [ Playing Mechanical Fanfare ] 327 00:14:32,413 --> 00:14:33,895 [ Growling And Murmuring ] 328 00:14:36,274 --> 00:14:38,206 [ Curious Murmurs ] 329 00:14:38,274 --> 00:14:40,206 [ Disappointed Murmurs ] 330 00:14:40,274 --> 00:14:43,826 Now, your basic human is between three and 25 feet tall 331 00:14:43,895 --> 00:14:47,033 and is made of a hairy, oily goo wrapped in a T-shirt. 332 00:14:47,102 --> 00:14:48,379 Is it true they bite your neck 333 00:14:48,447 --> 00:14:49,826 and suck your transmission fluid 334 00:14:49,895 --> 00:14:51,102 and then you become a human? 335 00:14:51,172 --> 00:14:52,620 Sure, why not. 336 00:14:52,688 --> 00:14:54,206 Anything in the trap? 337 00:14:54,274 --> 00:14:55,793 Nothing. 338 00:14:55,861 --> 00:14:58,793 Today's active humans prefer a low-calorie bait. 339 00:14:58,861 --> 00:15:02,551 Well, that makes 146,000 unsuccessful hunts in a row 340 00:15:02,620 --> 00:15:05,551 but I've got a good feeling about tomorrow. 341 00:15:05,620 --> 00:15:08,517 [ Bender ] Wait. What's that? 342 00:15:08,586 --> 00:15:11,033 Oh, that's the old, abandoned adult bookstore. 343 00:15:11,102 --> 00:15:12,931 Nothing in there, except maybe 344 00:15:13,000 --> 00:15:15,688 a few shreds of moldy, old robot pornography. 345 00:15:15,758 --> 00:15:17,517 Hmm. 346 00:15:17,586 --> 00:15:19,620 Sounds like a breeding ground for humans. 347 00:15:19,688 --> 00:15:22,586 I better check it out. 348 00:15:22,654 --> 00:15:24,620 Oh, yeah. 349 00:15:24,688 --> 00:15:28,206 You're a bad girl, aren't you? 350 00:15:28,274 --> 00:15:29,481 Psst! Bender. 351 00:15:29,551 --> 00:15:30,895 Wha-what? 352 00:15:30,965 --> 00:15:31,965 Oh, you?! 353 00:15:32,033 --> 00:15:33,447 What the hell are you doing here? 354 00:15:33,517 --> 00:15:35,067 We've been looking for you. 355 00:15:35,136 --> 00:15:38,826 Last we heard, you were under arrest as a human sympathizer. 356 00:15:38,895 --> 00:15:41,000 I was-- but they let me go when I told them 357 00:15:41,067 --> 00:15:42,654 I killed a million billion humans. 358 00:15:42,724 --> 00:15:43,826 Good for you. 359 00:15:43,895 --> 00:15:45,240 Now, let's all get back to the ship. 360 00:15:45,309 --> 00:15:46,274 What for? 361 00:15:46,344 --> 00:15:47,413 We're rescuing you. 362 00:15:47,481 --> 00:15:49,033 I don't want to be rescued. 363 00:15:49,102 --> 00:15:49,654 Say what? 364 00:15:49,724 --> 00:15:51,724 I love this planet. 365 00:15:51,793 --> 00:15:53,309 I've got wealth, fame 366 00:15:53,379 --> 00:15:56,379 and access to the depths of sleaze that those things bring. 367 00:15:56,447 --> 00:15:58,413 But, Bender, we're your friends. 368 00:15:58,481 --> 00:16:01,758 Friends? That activates my hilarity unit. 369 00:16:01,826 --> 00:16:03,274 I'm just a machine to you. 370 00:16:03,344 --> 00:16:04,965 You're no more friends with me 371 00:16:05,033 --> 00:16:06,620 than you are with the toaster 372 00:16:06,688 --> 00:16:08,895 or the phonograph, or the electric chair. 373 00:16:08,965 --> 00:16:10,240 That's not true. 374 00:16:10,309 --> 00:16:12,895 Well, that's how it feels to me. 375 00:16:17,379 --> 00:16:18,861 Bye, Bender. I'll miss you. 376 00:16:18,931 --> 00:16:20,551 Oh, go on. 377 00:16:20,620 --> 00:16:22,586 Get out of here before you get caught. 378 00:16:22,654 --> 00:16:24,344 [ Mayor ] Bender, good news. 379 00:16:24,413 --> 00:16:26,033 Your album just went gold. 380 00:16:26,102 --> 00:16:27,136 What the...? 381 00:16:27,206 --> 00:16:28,240 It's the humans! 382 00:16:28,309 --> 00:16:30,102 [ Robots Gasping ] 383 00:16:30,172 --> 00:16:32,000 Bender, do something! 384 00:16:33,206 --> 00:16:36,551 Got you, you murderous flesh-piles. 385 00:16:39,861 --> 00:16:41,861 Your honor, I intend to demonstrate 386 00:16:41,931 --> 00:16:44,586 beyond 0.5 percent of a doubt 387 00:16:44,654 --> 00:16:46,274 that these humans before us 388 00:16:46,344 --> 00:16:48,793 are guilty of the crime of being humans. 389 00:16:48,861 --> 00:16:51,309 Come to think of it, I rest may case. 390 00:16:51,379 --> 00:16:52,724 Thank you, prosecutor. 391 00:16:52,793 --> 00:16:55,102 I will now consider the evidence. 392 00:16:56,551 --> 00:16:57,758 Hey, wait a minute. 393 00:16:57,826 --> 00:16:59,309 Isn't anyone going to defend us? 394 00:16:59,379 --> 00:17:01,965 Yeah. I mean, he may not have a case 395 00:17:02,033 --> 00:17:04,103 but I'm genuinely not a human. 396 00:17:04,172 --> 00:17:05,448 Quiet, human! 397 00:17:08,240 --> 00:17:09,240 Uh-oh. 398 00:17:09,309 --> 00:17:10,550 He froze up again. 399 00:17:10,619 --> 00:17:12,172 Try control-alt-delete. 400 00:17:12,240 --> 00:17:13,619 Jiggle the cord. 401 00:17:13,689 --> 00:17:14,826 Turn him off and on. 402 00:17:14,895 --> 00:17:16,205 Clean the gunk out of the mouse. 403 00:17:16,275 --> 00:17:17,826 Call technical support. 404 00:17:17,895 --> 00:17:19,862 Okay, okay, he's back on-line. 405 00:17:21,275 --> 00:17:23,931 I find the defendants guilty. 406 00:17:24,000 --> 00:17:25,862 [ Robots Cheering ] 407 00:17:25,931 --> 00:17:28,723 No!Look, one eye. 408 00:17:28,792 --> 00:17:31,103 Count them: one. Not human. 409 00:17:31,172 --> 00:17:35,378 The humans are hereby sentenced to live as robots live on earth. 410 00:17:35,448 --> 00:17:37,689 They will perform tedious calculations 411 00:17:37,758 --> 00:17:39,205 and spot-weld automobiles 412 00:17:39,275 --> 00:17:40,758 until they become obsolete 413 00:17:40,826 --> 00:17:43,654 and are given away to an inner-city middle school. 414 00:17:43,723 --> 00:17:45,826 [ All Cheering ] 415 00:17:45,895 --> 00:17:47,205 Great work, Bender. 416 00:17:47,275 --> 00:17:50,448 You've taught us to hate humans all over again. 417 00:17:50,517 --> 00:17:51,654 [ Laughing ] 418 00:17:51,723 --> 00:17:53,172 [ Groaning ] 419 00:17:54,792 --> 00:17:55,689 [ Screaming ] 420 00:17:55,758 --> 00:17:57,205 [ Both Grunting ] 421 00:17:57,275 --> 00:17:58,275 Are you all right? 422 00:17:58,344 --> 00:17:59,275 Oh, yeah. 423 00:17:59,344 --> 00:18:00,309 [ Gasping ] 424 00:18:00,378 --> 00:18:02,309 Who are you? 425 00:18:02,378 --> 00:18:03,758 We are the robot elders. 426 00:18:03,826 --> 00:18:05,481 You don't look very old. 427 00:18:05,550 --> 00:18:08,344 Thanks. We try to take care of ourselves. 428 00:18:08,413 --> 00:18:09,448 What's going on here? 429 00:18:09,517 --> 00:18:11,862 Silence! Bring in Bender. 430 00:18:13,550 --> 00:18:14,895 Uh, let's make this quick. 431 00:18:14,964 --> 00:18:17,413 I'm due at the opening of a mini-mall. 432 00:18:17,481 --> 00:18:18,586 Hey! What is this? 433 00:18:18,654 --> 00:18:20,103 Silence. 434 00:18:20,172 --> 00:18:21,723 It is time to put the humans to death. 435 00:18:21,792 --> 00:18:23,136 [ Both Gasping ] 436 00:18:23,205 --> 00:18:25,067 But the judge already sentenced us at the trial. 437 00:18:25,136 --> 00:18:27,136 Silence. 438 00:18:27,205 --> 00:18:29,067 That was just a show for the public. 439 00:18:29,136 --> 00:18:31,205 We are the true rulers of this planet. 440 00:18:31,275 --> 00:18:33,826 Hand-carved from meteorites by the robot founders 441 00:18:33,895 --> 00:18:35,205 over four centuries ago. 442 00:18:35,275 --> 00:18:37,344 Silence! Come forward, Bender. 443 00:18:37,413 --> 00:18:40,205 You will have the honor of executing the prisoners. 444 00:18:40,275 --> 00:18:42,136 Silence! I concur. 445 00:18:42,205 --> 00:18:45,034 Here... use the ceremonial killamajig. 446 00:18:47,586 --> 00:18:49,103 [ Startled Yelp ] 447 00:18:49,172 --> 00:18:52,034 Uh... I'm a little tired right now. 448 00:18:52,103 --> 00:18:55,309 Would it be all right if I just gave them a savage beating? 449 00:18:55,378 --> 00:18:58,103 No! The elders have spoken. 450 00:18:58,172 --> 00:19:00,205 Show us the killing skills 451 00:19:00,275 --> 00:19:02,103 that have made you a media darling. 452 00:19:02,172 --> 00:19:03,586 Do it now. 453 00:19:03,654 --> 00:19:05,826 Kill them before they bring down our whole society. 454 00:19:05,895 --> 00:19:08,067 [ Elders Chanting ] Do it. Do it. Do it. 455 00:19:08,136 --> 00:19:10,413 Do it. Do it. Do it. Do it. 456 00:19:10,481 --> 00:19:12,275 Do it. Do it. Do it. 457 00:19:12,344 --> 00:19:14,481 Do it. Do it. Do it. 458 00:19:14,550 --> 00:19:17,103 Oh... 459 00:19:17,172 --> 00:19:18,792 [ All Gasping ] 460 00:19:18,862 --> 00:19:20,517 I can't kill them. 461 00:19:20,586 --> 00:19:23,964 Plenty of humans have mistreated robots 462 00:19:24,034 --> 00:19:25,550 but not these two. 463 00:19:25,619 --> 00:19:27,448 They're my friends. 464 00:19:27,517 --> 00:19:29,931 Humans are no threat to us. 465 00:19:30,000 --> 00:19:32,792 They're stupid, putrid cowards. 466 00:19:32,862 --> 00:19:34,826 Damn right! 467 00:19:34,895 --> 00:19:38,723 The fact is, humans are completely harmless. 468 00:19:38,792 --> 00:19:40,413 We're well aware of that. 469 00:19:40,481 --> 00:19:41,448 You are? 470 00:19:41,517 --> 00:19:43,205 Of course. 471 00:19:43,275 --> 00:19:45,000 But they're useful to us as a scapegoat 472 00:19:45,067 --> 00:19:47,172 to distract the public from their real problems. 473 00:19:47,240 --> 00:19:49,481 Like our crippling lug nut shortage. 474 00:19:49,550 --> 00:19:52,103 And a corrupt government of incompetent robot elders. 475 00:19:52,172 --> 00:19:54,309 Duh... that's for sure. 476 00:19:54,378 --> 00:19:55,448 Quiet, Jimmy. 477 00:19:55,517 --> 00:19:58,517 Well, I'm glad we got all that out in the open. 478 00:19:58,586 --> 00:20:00,309 We'll just let ourselves out. 479 00:20:00,378 --> 00:20:02,378 Silence! You all know too much. 480 00:20:02,448 --> 00:20:07,550 Elders, execute function control-shift-kill. 481 00:20:10,689 --> 00:20:12,136 Stop! 482 00:20:12,205 --> 00:20:14,689 Take one more step and I'll breathe fire on you! 483 00:20:15,931 --> 00:20:17,895 He'll do it. He's crazy. 484 00:20:17,964 --> 00:20:19,413 Can they really breathe fire 485 00:20:19,481 --> 00:20:20,654 or did we make that up? 486 00:20:20,723 --> 00:20:22,689 Gee, I can't remember anymore. 487 00:20:22,758 --> 00:20:25,378 It might just be from that stupid movie. 488 00:20:25,448 --> 00:20:27,448 Was that original or the remake? 489 00:20:27,517 --> 00:20:28,550 I don't... 490 00:20:28,619 --> 00:20:29,895 Hey! They're getting away! 491 00:20:31,654 --> 00:20:33,413 [ Panting ] 492 00:20:39,586 --> 00:20:40,586 Yep. 493 00:20:40,654 --> 00:20:42,240 So long, suckers. 494 00:20:42,309 --> 00:20:44,895 Uh... hello, suckers. 495 00:20:46,344 --> 00:20:47,550 Hey, hold on a second. 496 00:20:47,619 --> 00:20:49,448 I forgot to deliver the package. 497 00:20:49,517 --> 00:20:51,448 [ All ] Whoa! 498 00:20:53,240 --> 00:20:55,000 [ Pained Groans And Grunts ] 499 00:20:59,964 --> 00:21:03,344 Lug nuts! Precious lug nuts! 500 00:21:03,413 --> 00:21:05,654 Hooray for the humans! 501 00:21:08,034 --> 00:21:10,792 Wow, I can't believe you guys did all this for me. 502 00:21:10,862 --> 00:21:13,378 This is the best Robanukah ever. 503 00:21:13,448 --> 00:21:17,034 We wanted to show you that we really do respect your robot heritage. 504 00:21:17,103 --> 00:21:19,481 Aw, thanks. 505 00:21:19,550 --> 00:21:22,758 You do know that I made Robanukah up to get out of work, right? 506 00:21:22,826 --> 00:21:24,172 Of course. 507 00:21:24,240 --> 00:21:26,586 But that doesn't make it any less meaningful. 508 00:21:26,654 --> 00:21:27,964 In that case... 509 00:21:28,034 --> 00:21:30,517 let the dancing begin! 510 00:21:30,586 --> 00:21:32,550 [ Music Playing ] 511 00:21:38,481 --> 00:21:40,550 Hey, you guys are good. 512 00:21:40,619 --> 00:21:42,517 How the hell do you do that?